Citation Needed - Cannabis

Episode Date: February 10, 2021

Cannabis (/ˈkænəbɪs/)[2] is a genus of flowering plants in the family Cannabaceae. The number of species within the genus is disputed. Three species may be recognized: Cannabis sativa, Cannabis indica, and Cannabis ruderalis; C. ruderalis may be included within C. sativa; all three may be treated as subspecies of a single species, C. sativa;[1][3][4][5] or C. sativa may be accepted as a single undivided species.[6] The genus is widely accepted as being indigenous to and originating from Central Asia, with some researchers also including upper South Asia in its origin.[7][8] --- Our theme song was written and performed by Anna Bosnick. If you’d like to support the show on a per episode basis, you can find our Patreon page here.  Be sure to check our website for more details.

But the magic armor doesn't even make a difference just like an outfits change or something. Well, no, no, no, it protects her from Kristen Wiggs Clause. God, I'm a little stupid though. So stupid. It really was Jesus Tom who call now. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no fire. I'm a Hissie's uh, I'm going. Okay, what happened in here? Yeah, so you know how this week's essay is on cannabis? I do, yes. I feel like I don't spend enough time telling you guys how much I love doing this show. Right, so keep an eye. We thought, but let's do the show high.

So we bought a bunch of weed like a bunch of weed like I like you guys well we were always friends But like this show medicine to a fan yeah, and as you can see no came in early and smoked it all I got you okay, so no is just Super duper high. Yeah, but like more than usual. More than usual, yes, which is almost impossible. Okay. So again, business as usual. Yeah, I guess so.

Yeah, I guess it's the same. Right. Yeah. You guys want Thai food? I want Thai food. I mean, yes. Yeah. I do want to share.

Yeah, that's a good idea. Sure. Awesome. Hello and welcome to Citation Needed, the podcast where you choose a subject, read a single article about it on Wikipedia and pretend we're experts because this is the internet and that's how it works now. I'm Heath and fuck Nancy Reagan. I'm gonna throw that out there and I'm joined by the usual joint subcommittee first up

We have three husky narks from 21 plump street Digestion is 910 to the locky I've always thought husky was a weird euphemism for fat, you know like somewhere out there There's a three-pack a day smoker upset because now her voice sounds big bone And he if you laugh, but if you always look like you're wearing a bullet-provest the bad guys don't know when you are so think think We also have a guy who fought the war on drugs better than the DEA with personal consumption alone. No way is here. I don't mean to brag, but yes, I've taken out more weed than periquat.

Yeah, you've also put a lot onto the street, too. It's fine. That's it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, so Noah, after that edit, what person-place thing, concept phenomenon or event? Are we going to be talking about today? We're going to be talking about cannabis. Fantastic. And apparently you translated the majority of your cellular structure into an S-

and all of these H's and C's. Are you ready to give everyone an audio contact high somehow? Okay, now I'm concerned about the people who are commuting. Heath, listen to this when you get home. Yeah. All right, so let's start at the beginning. How is John Lithgow involved? Right. Especially even,

especially even though he was a trust can. Okay, so the 1998 film Homegrown opens up with John Lithgow pointing out that there are more terms from marijuana than there are for anything other than sex and defecation. And well, that's almost certainly not true. There's no way it's not. There's no club. No, but he says it. The fact that it's even in the running is a pretty solid indicator of its cultural

importance in the modern world. And it's also my way of apologizing in advance for probably 20 different terms for weed before this is over. So just keep up. We get it. And you know what people have 70 words for snow. Noah has that many for weed. It tracks.

It tracks us. It does. All right. So cannabis is a genus of flowering plant. And there's actually a bit of disagreement as to how many species there are in that genus. But the two that matter are cannabis, the TV and cannabis, indica. And while hippies will go on and on about how you can make great rope and paper and shit out of its fibers and great oil out of its seeds, odds are pretty low that they'll be able

to tell you about the rope making qualities of any other plants. The real reason that anybody gives this shit about it outside of the textile industry is that buds get you mad high. Textile hippie in the back of the room slowly and sadly puts away trifold presentation. I could tell you. All right, so now like humans cannabis is sexually dimorphous, meaning that there are male and female varieties that differ beyond their sex organs. And like humans, the male variety is pretty much useless

unless you wanna make rope out of it. Well, actually, Noah, actually, I think I'd make a bad rope. If I was a person, I'd explain to you. Yeah, I'd say I'd like to play devil's advocate here. It's the only rope you can render. Yeah. So, but the females produce those aforementioned buds, which in turn produce that aforementioned mat high, specifically

quoting from the Wikipedia article here, cannabinoids, turponoids, and other compounds are secreted by the glantular trichromes that occur most abundantly on the floral callixes and bracts of female plants. And quote, the key is yes, it's exactly a sexy as that. Calixente, yeah. Honestly, the only centerfold I ever put on my wall

was from High Times Magazine, like that's true. All right, so marijuana got it started. Something's healing actually. Not that I remember back. It really was. All right. So marijuana got it started in Central Asia back in the Neolithic age where it was used for fabric and ropes and also probably for smoking because our record of the psychoactive

properties are recorded in the very earliest records they possibly could be recorded in. Now, the earliest definitive archaeological record of its use comes from around 5500 years ago in Romania, but the kind of evidence that we would have probably wouldn't last more than 5500 years, so there's little doubt it was along established practice by that. I like the idea of an old-timey weed dealer. So like, oh, you want to announce no problem. I'm just going to take my horse to my guy. You just wait here on this log with my creepy girlfriend. Like two days back.

Will she change out of just my t-shirt? No, no, she won't. No, I'm sorry. No, she's an artist. Talk to her about art. Tell them about your poems. Tell them about your poems. I'll be back. So, yes. So, the working theory among scholars now is that marijuana was first used for its psychoactive properties by the proto-indo-European tribes at least 7,000 years ago.

Now, if you're familiar with them at all, with the proto-indo-European, it's probably because there's the parent language of Spanish, English, Portuguese, Hindi, Urdu, Bengali, Russian, Punjabi, German, Persian, French, Italian, and a couple of languages, I've never heard of. So needless to say, their customs got around quite a bit. Yeah, I like the Proto-Indo Europeans first album before they were signed. That's all those other likes, don't you?

Motherfucker of the Proto-Indo Europeans become the new fucking atrustskins Everything starts with the fucking prodo Indo-Europeans or whatever. No, there's no way to do an essay on that without it Turned a Nazi in a certain point All right, so so marijuana's antiquity is also visible in a few of our oldest holy books There's some research suggesting that the Indo-Iranian drug, Soma, which is mentioned in the Vedas, may have been cannabis-based or at least sometimes cannabis-based.

There's also some recent archeological findings that suggest early Hebrew rituals may have regularly burned cannabis as a sacrament. And since Frankensteads and Murr are basically two words for the same thing, there's long been speculation that one of the gifts the wise men brought to Mary after she squeezed out baby Jesus was originally we.

Not not so that baby Jesus could do bung rips, of course, but because it's common sense for women after child. Jesus goes to cover the ball with his hand and he makes a smoke rink. Yeah. I wait, no, I can hit it through this guys watching. All right, so I'm pretty sure that the earliest written record of marijuana comes from the

ancient Assyrians who blame the Iranians for introducing them to it when Assyrians mom caught them. And the Assyrian word for it, Kunubu, gives us the modern day cannabis, almost certainly. But the Iranians weren't just getting the Assyrians high. They were also introducing the shit to the Scythians, the Thracians, the Dacians who took such a liking to it that eventually their shamans were known as Kapnobatai, which means those who walk on clouds. Okay, I get it.

The Iranians were the latchkey kid with divorced parents in the Middle East. No, we get it. I gotta say, as somebody who has done far less drugs than everyone else on this show, I get a test to this. There is no easier way to get high than to tell people you don't get high. They will make getting you fucked up your life's mission. Like that's all that happened in Iran. Tom, you don't get high?

I haven't gotten high in a year. I'll be there in a minute. Patreon go. No, of course, there are a lot of different ways to use weed, and it's not always clear from the record how it's being used, right? So, like, then, figure out, dabs and shit, yet. So, ancient potheads generally had three choices. You could either ingest it by cooking it into a food or a drink or something. You could burn it in an incense bowl and in an enclosed space,

or you could just cut out the middle man on that last one and smoke the shit. The earliest evidence of smoking comes from a 2,500 year old tomb in Western China. Okay, I got an idea. What if we just poke a little hole and we suck on the tent? We're gonna put a hole on.

Hold on, I even have a better idea than that. Yeah, we can just... We like the whole tent on fire. Okay, but I get to eat the tent. I get to eat the tent. Damn it. All right, so... Pocket.

Now, in the Wikipedia article, the history section jumps straight from Ethiopian pipes with traces of cannabis that carbon date back to 1320 CE to the 1840s. But rest assured stuff happened in the interim is just that weed history is harder to remember than regular history, I guess. Alright, so in 1842 there was an Irish physician named William Brook O'Shaughnessy. Because you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, you did, He tried to enjoy it with taking it. You're right. Wow. Ah! Ah!

Ah! Ah! I'm gonna call counterweight and make them call you and you have to call them back. I'm gonna take that though. We need another take of that though. We need another take of that. You got to say it one more time. You are to enjoy it.

You are to enjoy it. Ah! Ah! Yes. That's my ringtone now. That's amazing. That's my ringtone for Heath now. Can you guys each do an impression of a slur for my people one by one? That'd be great. Wait, that wasn't already your ringtone for you. That's so good. So good. Alright, so oh, Sean, I just finished up. I guess I need not apply to this podcast.

Oh, Sean, I just finished up. I guess I need not apply to this podcast. Very hard for our people historically. All right, so. That's so good. All right. So, Ashana, who had just finished up a stint in Bengal as a medical officer for the East India Company, brought home a parting gift in the form of a quantity, nobody knows how much, of cannabis, which Oshonasi, or St. Willie,

as he's known in my household, used to reignite interest in the drug in the West. There's just some hard-up teenager trying to scrape 700-year-old resin from the plunder room in the British museum. Okay, but that's pretty much all the rooms at the University of America. You got to be way more specific. Very true.

Very true. Exactly. All right, so it's also in the 1840s when we start to see the first legal prohibitions against wheat. The colonial government of Mauritius banned wheat in 1840 because they were afraid it would bring joy to their indentured servants. The same thing happened in Singapore in 1870, but eventually the white ruling class realized that marijuana wasn't just popular among dark-skinned people in their overseas colonies.

It was also growing popular among the dark-skinned people in their home countries. So they started banning it all over the place in the early 20th century. And that's been the policy ever, Sam. Yeah. Yeah. I love that they don't want their indentured servants to be happy like wouldn't they be Easier to deal with it. They be lazy. No Tom that ruins it. I just So so the first law banning marijuana in North America comes in 1906 in the District of Columbia

But it would take another three decades for the cause to catch on nationwide. In fact, Canada actually criminalized it nationally before we did with their opium and narcotic active 1923, but the US wasn't be out prudent by a bunch of uppity Canadians for long. So we followed suit in 1937 with the marijuana tax act, but they spelled marijuana with an H because they be fucked if they were going to bother to learn how to spell in Mexican ease. And they chose to use the less familiar term marijuana over the more familiar hemp because it crusade to stamp out the dangers of rope fibers that you know that just didn't catch on them with the public's imagination, but a crusade against a scary Mexican word was a hell of a lot easier to sell.

Yeah, the first day in the Oval Office after he removed the Diet Coke button, Biden also signed an order that we had to stop playing the first few bars of box to Cotta and Fugan D minor whenever someone said Mexican. Damn, and he's costing American jobs already. I knew I should have voted third party. I knew it. Wasted your vote, buddy. No, no, no, no.

We should do that when we said third party too. Now, it's worth noting, as his name implies, the marijuana tax act wasn't actually an outright prohibition. What the law did was require a person to obtain a tax stamp in order to sell marijuana and they just made it impossible to get the stamps. So that bizarre construction was just how it worked until part of that law was struck down as unconstitutional in 1969. I guess the argument was that like the law violated

the Fifth Amendment since you could only obtain the stamp by presenting the weed that you want to stamp at which time they would arrest you for having the un-stamp. Right? I kind of love it. I'm not going to lie. I just love it. Oh, you want me to get the stamp? What are we to stamp in? And you're arrested. Great. Yeah, good job. Oh, man, damn it. But no, but they didn't like get rid of the law they just replaced it with the controlled substances act of 19 okay, okay, the government is gonna close its eyes and turn around and the weed shows up at the desk at the front of the room Your stamp no, I have a solution you shake my hand with the weed I shake your hand with the stamp You arrest me. Nope, that's wrong. Sorry Crumble up the stamp and throw it on the ground off

all right so not everybody was on board with the push to criminalize weed though the chief voice pushing for the tax act was a dude named Harry Anselinger who ran the now defunct federal bureau of narcotics and the chief voice of opposition was famed to New York City mayor and shitty airport namesake ferello la guardia who had a damn tough moral code to parse right because he was all about keeping weed legal but fought against the scourge of pinball machines to his dying day yeah weird dude anyway he commissioned a report on ancillary or proposed law that concluded it was fucking stupid One thing I like about doing the show is that there's sort of a running theme that no matter what point in history

You are there's always one guy who was just like come on everybody. That's fucking stupid. It's obvious. We should Obviously we should do this right. Yeah, no, no. And for the last couple hundred years, that guy was Bernie Sanders. That's true. Yeah, right. That's the late 1700s. Yeah.

All right, so now the actual findings of this report are super interesting. It's actually the first known in-depth study into the effects of smoking weed in the US. I ultimately drew 13 conclusions. Most of them directly contradicting the hyperbolic propaganda of the day that suggested we cost like fucking axe murders and shit. They showed that it wasn't addictive, at least in the medical sense of the word, that

it didn't lead to the use of harder drugs, which we've had to prove 165 times since, an hour or so, that it didn't lead to juvenile delinquency, and that it wasn't a determining factor of major crimes. But in addition to those types of conclusions, it also tossed in a few that highlighted the real reason for the push to criminalize weed in the first place, such as conclusion number four, quote, the distribution and use of marijuana is centered in Harlem. And conclusion number five, quote, the majority of marijuana smokers are blacks and Latin America and you forgot conclusion number three sale of marijuana increases the sale of patchouli by 400%

Well there's that that's the reason I wholeheartedly support banning it that is the right that's the best argument against it I will have to know I don't need that but despite having the date on his side few prominent voices were willing to join in LaGuardia's defense, and ultimately the law would pass, and then a great darkness would fall over the United States in a great sadness that we're praying for a hundred years. Okay, but counterpoint, Heath's financial aid package had a great campus job. And speaking of which, we're gonna take a quick break for some opera pove. I'm gonna go smoke a joint right now. Hi, I'm Eli Bosnick. and I'm Cecil, something Italian.

And you know, we've had a lot of fun today, but we'd be remiss if we didn't take a moment to talk about the real dangers of marijuana use. That's right, Noah. Did you know that marijuana users are three times as likely to not know their band sucks as non-marijuana users? three times as likely to not know their band sucks as non marijuana users. Which is why we here at Citation Needed Podcast are proud to introduce sober phone. The first sobriety inducing headphone for marijuana users. Our state of the art technology runs your band through date sugar marijuana's natural polar

opposite so that you can go from this dude have you ever actually like listened like listen to the lyrics of fish it's like fucking poetry man poetry to this holy fuck is that bad sober phones nobody is good at the pheroman I'm good at the Theraman. I'm good at the Theraman. No, you're not. You're not good at it. You don't know, fucking something. We're gonna see. We're gonna see. Where we leave off, man. All right, so cannabis was criminalized pretty much

everywhere by the midway point of the 20th century. Up around that time, a curious thing started to happen. White people started smoking it. Now, it was only a few of them at first, and mostly it was the ones that liked that un-Christian jazz music, but the numbers finally swelled until we reached a point where suburban and even upper-class white kids were being punished

for crimes, just like working class minorities, and that couldn't last forever. I mean, no, it'd be fair. We did have a pretty workable system of just selectively applying those laws more harshly to non-whites. I mean, we did that for quite a long time. Quite a while, yeah, it lasted a good run.

Yeah. But the first cracks in the worldwide proodery against weed came in the mid-70s when the Dutch government wrapped up a series of effort diminishing punishments with limited decriminalization. Starting in 1976, it became legal to buy weed and license coffee shops and to possess up to five grams for home use and it was only then That fetal Noah was ready to be born a Gamble strikes wood in Amsterdam a woman's water breaks somewhere in Detroit Now it would take a damn long time for any other countries to follow suit

But the inexorable shift to decriminalization started to gain momentum in November of 2012 when voters in Colorado went to the polls to vote on Amendment 64 and also Barack Obama. Now this wouldn't be the first state to vote yes on a referendum to decriminalize weed. California had a series of legalization efforts thwarted by the federal government starting in 1996, but Colorado was the first to do it

well, an awesome president that probably knows how to roll a joint was running the country. So this time it stuck. That's part of my presidential obstacle course, rolling a joint. You should have to do that. Oh, no. Just like play pool throw darts, do a cross repuzzle.

I don't know, just a bunch of stuff. Way better than debates, just a series of physical mental challenges. I would pay good money to watch joe biden try to roll a joy i was trying to crumple the paper around the weed in a sphere what do you think she's gonna do with that all right so said but birdie would definitely be president right like that

that's the qualification you think you can throw a? I don't think that goes well. Now what those mittens on he can't. All right, so since then 14 more states have joined Colorado with the legalization of recreational cannabis in another 22 of legalized medical cannabis, which is like recreational cannabis except a doctor has to lie and pretend to lead as medicine We are allowed to have it which is fucking stupid. Weed isn't Metas it's fucking weed man and sure it can stimulate your appetite And I guess maybe it helps with some chronic pains, but we have other shit that does that and it doesn't like you know

You don't have to smoke it. You know how much of the active ingredient you've taken at a time. You fucked up now. The cannabis fairy is definitely not gonna cure your cancer. Right, definitely not gonna do that. And no credible doctor has ever prescribed medicine in the gummy bear form. That's right.

Not to hurt a dog anyway. Yes, man. Just don't make it a bear. That just makes it sill to run a dog run anyway. Yes. Just don't make it a bear. That just makes it sillier, man. If you've got me something, just make it a rectangle. Just make it a rectangle. We're talking cloud coma here.

Come on. Yeah, right. It's a serious. All right. But so, but that means that if you're willing to lie to a doctor that's willing to lie back to you, we is legal in most US states. Of course, it's still illegal on the federal level, so that's weird ambiguity there in

the law. Hopefully that information is going to date this episode super, super soon. There's every indication that there's plenty of support in Congress to make the state's decisions official on this. But regardless of its legal status, cannabis remains the most popular drug in the world, and it's not even fucking close. In fact, according to the 2016 estimates cited on Wikipedia, there are more cannabis users than the users of Amphetamines, opioids, cocaine, and ecstasy combined. In fact, you can buy them and double those numbers and

the pot smokers would still outnumber them by 10 million plus. Right, but the method cocausers have the strength of 10 men. So, I don't know. Well, and the weed smokers are not putting up much of a fight. Yeah You just got to be careful not to combine them or like dudes with the munchies I'll just chew right through their own cheeks. That's the right. Yeah Disagree I think Right so you know the estimate suggests that there are something like 200 million cannabis users worldwide, and although it wasn't entirely clear, I'm pretty sure that's the number that it used it in the past year. Now, I should point out that because of its illicit status, there's actually a death of high-quality research on the long-term effects of cannabis use.

The increasing availability, though, is starting to turn that around, but we still know way less about it than we should, that there's like, you know, whatever, three to five percent of Earth's population smoking this shit every year. Interestingly enough, by the way, it looks like the US does not lead the world in per capita weed smoking. I would have thought we had that, but apparently we're number two behind Zambia. And I'm pretty sure I'm the only one on this show doing as part to reclaim our leads. Hey, hey, I do my part. I've had the munchies since I was eight years old.

I'll have you. They don't count that in the statistics. You also wrote the essay about how Zambia's number one in Jankham used to be poo in a bottle smacking. I think one number two in that. So, no, of course, the effect that weed is going to have is going to vary widely depending on the person, the dosage, the method of delivery, and the quality and type of weed that it is.

But the list of effects Wikipedia lists are euphoria, altered states of mind, and sense of time, difficulty concentrating in pairs, short-term memory, and body movement, relaxation, and an increase in appetite. And higher doses, it can also cause anxiety, delusions, hallucinations, panic, paranoia, and psychosis. Okay, I don't want to correct the scientists, but there has to be a better term for, whoa, it's 4 p.m. already, then all too sensitive.

The first time I spoke to you, I was hoping I was going to wake up in the year 2024. I spoke to you. I was hoping I was gonna wake up in the year 2024 The problem is you never know which direction time will alter in Eli the last time I ate a bunch of gummy bears I ended up high for three hours every 10 minutes. It was That's what I mean that's the older sense So let me address the psychosis thing for a second though, because like when people hear that they tend to immediately go to that crazy like refer madness type shit that circulated to drum up public support for criminalizing this stuff in the first place. That propaganda is hilariously over the top and it often made references to a case where

a kid in Florida murdered his family with an axe back in 1933 That's a reference to a real event had fuck all to do with weed But there was a kid who killed his family with an axe that being said The press at the time said that the kid was addicted to marijuana and the anti-weed crusaders ran Yeah, that's not how it works if that kid couldn't find any weed that day The murder was gonna happen either way. It just made the ax murder super passive aggressive. Okay. The only practical difference is whether there's gonna be

a murder or a murder and a taco bell run. That's the only thing. Right. Right. So with shit like that, still echoing in the public consciousness, it's easy to laugh off claims that weed causes psychosis, but it does

okay so according to wikipedia article quote there is a strong relation between cannabis use and the risk of psychosis though the direction of causality is uh... debated and quote and that last bit is true in the sense that people will argue about any god damn thing but i smoke weed a lot uh... so i followed this shit pretty closely and as near as i can tell there is increasingly clear evidence that there's a causal link between cannabis use and psychosis, especially

when the cannabis user is in their teens or early 20s. Yeah, that's bad luck. Jerry smokes weed, gets giggling on the couch. You smoke weed. You need to kill everyone at Wendy's because the salad bar told you to. Different people. Now, there are a number of ways to enjoy marijuana, two of which I haven't tried. You can of course smoke the buds. This is typically done by rolling them into joints, slips or plunts, or you can skip the wrapping it in paper part all together and smoke it out of a pipe, long hookah, steam roller or vaporizer.

In addition to the buds, you can also add or substitute keef, which is the powdery resin glands that sit on the surface of the buds and have a much higher concentration of cannabinoids than the buds. Yes, we can pour gravy over your meat or we can inject it into your eyeball, which would the gentleman prefer? It's all about how serious you are about your gravy. Wait, which are the two you haven't tried? Well, I mean, like of everything, not just of what I'm listing here. Okay. If neither the buds door the keeper concentrated enough for you, you can always try Hashish or Hash, which is a concentrated resin that you get from pressing key

for boiling down the essence of the leaves and stems and shit. And that can be either smoked, vaped or eaten, or you could make it as hash oil, which is like, I just not having enough time to finish making your hash really. There are also a number of different tinctures and infusions and shit that exist in case you want to drink your weed or just rub it into your skin. What? What the fuck are you on? A mink just rolling on the floor.

Why are we getting fucking creative with these contra- It's got a USB port just burned, lighted on fire in paper man what is it a fucking nickerel patch just but and okay with nickerel patch would be sweet but to supplement the joints you're smoking

and smoke it when i was done all right no if you had to summarize what you've learned in one sentence, what would it be? I forget. Americans. And are you ready for the quiz? I'm pretty sure I am actually.

Alright Noah, I've got to admit for a 44 year old man, your descriptions of weed were disappointingly cool. Luckily, the rest of the world's 44 year old men were there to make up for it. According to AmericanAddictionCenters.com, which of the following is slang for smoking pot? Oh lovely, oh lovely. A. Poking. No. B. Cheaching.

Absolutely not. C. Hitting the hay. That's all the bad. D. What? Going loco. D. What? E. Getting the bad. D, going loco. What? E, getting the wind. All right, some kids, some of these kids told them that that was the thing so that they'd

get farted on. Yeah. F, blasting or G, none of the above, but the idiots who wrote that website are pretty sure it's all of the above. I'm sorry, I, you know what, I have been getting the wind recently, that website are pretty sure it's all of the above. I'm sorry, I, you know what, I have been getting the wind recently, so I'm not sure, but pretty sure it's G none of the above. Oh, fantastic. Well done. All right, Noah, I'm just surprised this article took as long as it did for you to write.

So why did it take Noah 200 episodes to write about cannabis? Right? Uh, A, this was actually the first episode that he did write. He just misplaced it for 200 weeks. B, every time he sat down to write this, not chose. See, it took him longer than expected to combine all of his love letters into a single essay or D. He was in jail for acts murder. That's it. There was a day. Oh, secret answer E. I wish waiting for episode number 420 and I ran out of it.

Oh yeah. I don't know what you got it. No one more for you. We learned of Jesus's Wagon Bake early in the episode. What's a Stoner's favorite part of the Bible? A chronic goals Chronic fish and loaves see the burning Kush D a book of jobs

Super clever. It's gotta be D. It is, you know what, I'm gonna answer something else so that you can win. Okay, it's A, knowing that it's D. Okay, I'm sorry it is D. Turns out it's a good job. All right, Cecil, you stumped him, I guess you won. I guess. Sure, well let's get Tom to do some work.

All right, all right. Okay, well for Tom, Noah, Cecil and Eli, I'm Heath. Thank you for hanging out with us today. We'll be back next week and by then, Tom will be an expert on something else. Between now and then, you can hear Noah, Cecil, and Eli, I'm Heath, thank you for hanging out with us today. We'll be back next week, and by then, Tom will be an expert on something else. Between now and then, you can hear Tom and Cecil on Cognitive Disnance, and you can hear Eli knowing myself on God-Alpha movies, The Skating Atheist, The Skeptocrat, and D&D Monis. And if you're feeling worried that all your friends don't really like you, and they're just tolerating you, you can make a per episode donation at patreon.com slash citation

God. They really don't like you. It's true. And if you'd like to get in touch with us, listen to past episodes, connect with us on social media or take a look at the show notes, check out citation pod.com. And that's why what you and I call Thai food is mostly street food from Singapore. See, I didn't know that. I love you, man. Love you too, Noah.