Citation Needed - Famous Historical Animals

Episode Date: August 18, 2021

This week, Cecil takes us through a series of some of history's most courageous, most loyal, and most memorable animals. Our theme song was written and performed by Anna Bosnick. If you’d like to support the show on a per episode basis, you can find our Patreon page here.  Be sure to check our website for more details.

I thought Taskmaster was cool. It's just, you know, such a cool idea for a villain. I feel like they kind of half-assed it. Cause, you know, yeah, Natasha doesn't have any superpowers. Doesn't have any superpowers. Yeah, that's gonna be an issue. Heath, Heath, you have got the whole step. Jesus Christ!

The Ow! Seriously? You're startling him. You're startling him. Oh, oh, I'm sorry. I'll try to be an agony more calmly for the rest of this. Guys, what the hell is going on? Hey, no, hey, Cecil, get off me.

You know how I'm always coming up with awesome ideas to bring us more brand awareness, if you will? I think not. Yeah, last week you suggested we sell cocaine. Right, so this week's episode got me naked. What's up? I'm gonna show you missing. That's right, you got what's our show missing that's right and a door of the animal mascot stop what you're moving you

stop moving you're getting me stop and and I'm not and more adorable than a duck bill plan close am I right yeah I mean they are pretty good their little bills exactly yeah so turns out way less cute and friendly in person. And also poison, they're poisonous. Yes, they're poisonous. They're poisonous.

Finally venomous. Got him. Ha ha. There we go. Who's that mean man bothering you, Billy? Well, he's night night now, buddy, isn't he? Isn't he, buddy? He's named Billy.

That's adorable. I love it. I love it. I love it. Hate you guys. Hello and welcome to CitationNate in the podcast where we choose a subject to read a single article about it on Wikipedia and pretend we're experts because this is the internet, and that's how it works now. I'm no illusions and I'm going to be keeping this zoo this week, but I'm sure these motherfuckers are going to break out of their cages regardless.

First up, we have two men who scratched Eda famous animal onto their to-do list when they saw the title for this episode. He was... And... Oh yeah, when the episode doesn't relate to it, that's not part of it. My bucket list is always the three of us, just a list of animals that I want to fry and then serve in buckets. You would eat baby shark fin soup right now. Just like, for the story of something.

All right, also joining us tonight, two men whose body hair requires them to put and don't send me to a fucking bed on their emergency alert bracelets, Eli and Cecil. Yeah, I mean, technically don't send me to a vet and do not resuscitate are the same thing. So yeah, fat girl.

I'll do it. The body body here is mostly a downside, but occasionally a random lady in the park over my belly. So, you know, there's some pluses. All right, so before we get going today, I wanted to talk to you guys about some decidedly unfamous animals. That's us. We'd be lying if we said we didn't start the show in hopes of becoming a famous animal, but we'd be relying even more if we said that we accomplished that, but we didn't start the show in hopes of becoming a famous animal, but we'd be relying even more if we said that we accomplished that But we shouldn't go all the way out in the picture yet

So if you want to help us on that end be sure to stick around to the end of the show and with that out of the way Tell us Eli what person plays thing concept phenomenon or event what we'll be talking about today Famous animal concept. We've so rarely do concepts awesome and Cecil I'm not sure if you read a wiki about this or interviewed the subjects personally one way or the other are you ready to tell this tale? Oruses know so it's one of the main reasons I Get this started right guys. Let's get it Alright guys, let's get outside. Rain it in. Let's get it started.

Nane, Nane. We'll let him have it. Alright, so where are our cocks? Sorry. Alright, so Cesar, where does this? You're nading a lot. I don't know. Of course.

Alright, so Cesar, where does this story begin? Our list of famous animals starts with Sergeant reckless the pack horse. Sergeant reckless started out with the name Morning Sun, named by a Korean stable boy that owned her. This stable boy needed money to buy a prosthetic leg for a sister who had injured the leg in a minefield. And he had to sell his horse.

He sold it to Lieutenant Peterson of the United States Marine Corps for $250. The horse was then brought to the front, trained to carry loads of 24 pound artillery shells on its back for the recoilless rifle platoon of the fifth regiment. That's the saddest start to any story ever. She's so hot. There's nothing on Sergeant Brackless. There's an amputeil, a little girl. I know. I know. I know, man. I know man, I know. Yeah, this is sad on so many levels. I don't even know which ceramic locklin song to play. It's sort of mon.

Legs of an angel. I do. The horse is also legs of an angel. The horse is also an angel at the very most. Maybe the one. The horse was also trained to avoid barbed wire. I don't know. I don't know.

I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. The horse is also legs of an angel. The horse is also an angel at the very most. Maybe the one. The horse was also trained to avoid barbed wire lie down on the ground when it was under fire and to run to the bunker when it heard someone shout incoming. I feel like that guy. I feel like the guy who's in the bunker for the first time doesn't know the horse yet. Actually, we threw a lot of horses to didn't learn it quickly. My it's just like evolutionary pressure on them.

Yeah. The horse at first was kept near the camp, but after a while, they just let it roam free where she could walk into anyone's tent and lie down next to the hot stove inside on cold nights. The horse loved to eat. And here's a list from Wikipedia of what the horse love to gobble down. Quote.

She was fond of a wide variety of foodstuffs, entertaining the platoon by eating scrambled eggs and drinking Coca-Cola and beer. Food could not be left unattended around her. She was known to eat bacon, but her toast, chocolate bars, hard candy, shredded wheat, peanut butter sandwiches, and mashed potatoes. However, Mitchell advised to the platoon that she not be given more than two bottles of Coke a day. No beer limit. Interesting. She was not only fond of chewing on food, she ate a blanket and unattended poker chips as well. Okay, you know some new guy in that platoon got the ass blanket.

Like, no, seven out of seven out of seven. Yeah. Also, that section of Wikipedia is a fun and cheeky way of saying, we didn't have any food for our fucking horse. Yeah. We got to go. Yeah. On her first day in combat,

she brought shells with a little help from someone leading her. And when the gun went off, at first, she was spooked. After she calmed down, though, she was fine and quote, the second time the gun fired, she merely snorted. And at the end of the mission of the day, appeared calm and was seen trying to eat a discarded helmet liner. Just a shot of the horse lying on a bed under a ceiling fan. There's something happening here. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, the Battle of Vegas Hill, she made 51 solo trips with the artillery shell she was carrying

over 9,000 pounds worth of ammo that day. She was wounded actually twice that day in the left eye and in the left flank, but she kept working. And because of her dedication, she was promoted to corporal later that day. Later, after the war ended, she was promoted twice more, once to Sargent on April 10th, and then to Staff Sergeant on August 31st. She was honored with a 19 gun salute and a 1700 man parade. Yeah, if they really meant it, all the people would have marched in the middle and the horses would have gotten to watch from the sidelines.

That's what she would have wanted, see? That's what she would have wanted. 150 guys is the asses and 850 guys. In World War One, a group of soldiers numbering about 550 were trapped behind a hill, behind enemy lines without supplies when they began to be bombarded by their own sides artillery. After a bit, the number left alive was down to just below 200. You're trying to out sad the one like in Korean. They couldn't send any human runners because they're too close to German machine guns, so they decided to dispatch a carrier pigeon. The first pigeon and me calling it the first bird

here is probably the spoiler. It was released with a message that said, quote, many wounded, we cannot evacuate. End quote, it was shot down. The second bird, you notice that I'm still not naming them spoiler had this message, quote, matter of suffering can support be sent. End quote, it died valiantly in the line of duty. Okay. See, so I don't want to cast a pall over your whole essay here, but I'm pretty sure none of these birds like signed up

at a recruitment center. I want to kill them. I'm so glad. I feel like we just need to take a moment to appreciate how polite that second bird letter was. Like there's 300 of your friends blown to ship by your own army all around you. And you're still asking politely like you want to be excused from the day your serves your man's please stop

murdering us. We're on your team. So they reach into the coop and they get the next pigeon. This one, Chera me was given the note, quote, we are along the road parallel to set to 276.4. Our own artillery is dropping a barrage directly on us for heaven's sake stop and quote. The bird was released and immediately shot down by the Germans with shotgun, but but here's through the brass and missing an eye, it got up and flew 25 miles to the head. Jesus. With the message delivered, she's credited with saving the lives of all those

that were left. When she arrived back, her leg was damaged so bad that they had to remove it. Sorry. And the soldiers sent the bird back. No, no, when she arrived, no, when she arrived at the place of the hourglass, she was like, like, well, she had like a dangling. So they had to cut it off. Oh, and then they put a, they actually, but this is kind of adorable. They, the soldiers carved a peg leg out of wood for her. And then they gave it to her. And she could sort of hobble around that way. Cherimie was, that is, it is, it is a terrible, terrible path. It is a terrible path.

She sits on her shoulder. Cherimie, Cherimie was awarded the, the crowd to go. There you go. I was a medal and then a palm of Oakleaf cluster for her heroic service. Okay, so there's this fucking man, I moody looking pigeon getting free drinks at the bar, trying to hit on the wager says, you're now a safe 200 guys from their own. I'm, she's busy. She's busy. They're all too busy for sure at me. She's a very spoken class. Nice. Pearlsman. The band. Very good. Very good. He, I laughed. I thought it was good. Another war story. This one's from World War II. Smokey, the Yorkshire Terrier, Smokey was a tiny little gal way and only four

pounds and only seven inches tall. There's like this adorable image on Wikipedia, this dog inside an army helmet and it looks like a swimming pool. It's fucking so small. It's adorable. You have to see it. Smokey was found by a GI in the jungle of New Guinea. That GI sold her to another for six bucks and some change so he could keep playing poker. And the new GI, William Wynn, he would take Smokey and his backpack on missions for the rest of the world. Yeah. Because if there's anything soldiers don't have enough of its responsibility and weight again. We've got to be quiet, Smokey, the German and you're barking at a shadow. Cool, cool, good dog, good dog.

Smokey ate leftover rations in spam. She had a little doggie bed in winds tent. Smokey flew on 12 different combat missions dangling from winds pack. She was awarded eight battle stars and I'm not sure what that is. I only know that term in the context of galactica. She also pairs serites. She also survived the 150 air raids and a typhoon. Here's a quote, quote, smokey even parachuted from 30 feet in the air out of a tree using a parachute made just for her." When said the dog saved his life on multiple occasions as an early warning system for artillery, Smokey was also taught several tricks, including learning to walk a tightrope blindfolded.

Wait, really? Yeah. Okay. The day that ate off in a fucking battle, the trainer got me. Me too. See. guy made us see. I bet he did. I need a blindfolded tight, wrong walking dog. That's what you sounded like this all the time.

They're really killed by Nazis. Fuck you. She also performed for wounded soldiers at the hospitals. And because of this, Smoky is the first recorded therapy dog. Boy, I'll tell you a Cec swallow is just adorable, huh? Okay. Okay.

Let's talk about a few dogs that were loyal until the end. Oh, if you're talking about that fucking future on my episode, I'm leaving now. It's kind of, kind of, kind of, it's kind of, it's damage. This first is Hachiko. I don't know if I'm saying that correctly. It's in Akita from Japan. The dog's owner was a professor at Tokyo Imperial University.

Every day after work, the professor would arrive at the station and the dog would be there waiting for him. One day at work, the professor had a cerebral hemorrhage and died at school. The dog though would go each day for the next nine years of its life and waited at the station at the same time each day for its human to come home. There's actually

a bronze statue of the dog at Shia Buia station made in its honor. Dogs just sitting there. When this motherfucker shows up, I'm going to bite him so hard. He's so lame. Yeah. Meanwhile, I sometimes remember to call my dude every couple of weeks. I should really do better. I'm going to get him a dog. Another similar story out of Edinburgh. This is the story of Bobby.

Now this is probably more story than something a hundred percent documented. So keep that in mind here. But the story goes something like Bobby belong to a guy named John Gray. He's a night watchman for the police. I don't know what that is. Anyway, he died when he and when he was buried, Bobby spent the rest of his life on his human's grave.

He said to have guarded the grave for 14 years. And there's a statue of Bobby and Edinburgh at the corner of Candle Maker Row and George the fourth bridge. Guys, Scottland, can we circle up real quick? Take a knee. When a dog is living on a grave for what did you say 14 years? 14 years. Yeah. It's a story. 14 years. Okay. So when that happens, maybe we adopted it and give it a new home instead of letting it live in perpetual. I would make a better story. Yeah, it stayed there for a single day and was adopted. That's a better story than that one.

This dog seems sad. Let me take it home. Even some fucking. Yeah, just avoided a citation needed for you. You're welcome. Next, let's talk about pickles that the crime-solving dog. In 1966, this is my favorite. The Jules Remette trophy, which was the World Cup trophy up until 1970, was taken from a stamp exhibition in London. Well, yeah, mostly they got a well-meaning employee who was like, well, I didn't even fucking stamp. That doesn't go wrong. a well-meaning employee who's like, well, I didn't fucking stamp that doesn't go wrong. The guard took a short break to come back and find the cup gone.

The people who took the cup took the trophy, which wasn't worth all that much and left the rare stamps that were over three million bucks. Jesus Christ. The chairman of Old Timy FIFA got a call demanding $15,000 in ransom money for the trophy, and the police conducted the drop-off for that ransom money using slips of paper covered with five-pound notes, and then they wound up catching the guy. So, first of all, they asked for fives and ones originally, and then that's what happened, and then they were like, it fives intense.

We're going to make it fives intense. originally and then that's what happened and then they were like, five centense, we're gonna make a five cent. So an undercover cop showed up with the money and the fake paper and the thief was like, he didn't bring any cops, right? And the undercover cop was like, no. And that worked. How does that ever work? They did a lot, right? The cops can laugh they want. I'm sorry, seriously. Was this Ruse Pickles idea? How does the dog work? They big lot, right? The cops can laugh, they want. Sorry, seriously. Was this Ruse Pickle's idea? How does the dog work into the story? I'm so confused.

He's like, you don't really need a five pound note for everyone. He's not gonna pound them. Make him show you your dick. It's fine. It's fine. His dick. Eli, I mean, like, no one takes half an essay

to get to the point. I take one paragraph in your on my dick. The point is that half of the essay. Also, no one is never promising me pickles the crime solving dogs. All right, here comes pickles. He's so cute. Sometimes you just So fat. But the guy who stole the trophy did not give up its location. So enter pickles. He's out with his owner. He gets off his lead and he runs straight to the neighbor's car and he finds a little

package wrapped in paper. So he starts tearing at it and it turns out it was the trophy. So the dog's owner goes to the local police station, sets the trophy down and declares that he has found the world cup. And the police officers said something so prototypical, police and British quote, doesn't look very world copy to me son. And quote, and then after some investigation, I know right? Yeah. And after some investigation and some explanation because they thought he was probably the beef. Yeah, right. He and his dog pickles were heralded as heroes. Okay, that guy was so clearly the fucking thief or part of the guy.

He got a reward of 6,000 pounds eventually. And he got the party with the English team after they won that tournament in 66. So clearly part of the crime. His dog pickles was given the national canine defense medal and appeared in a film called the spy with the cold. That's excellent. And he won Italian dog of the year. Oh, okay.

Like I know old time movies had ways lower pacing than that, but I would love to know how the fuck they stretch dogs smell something in car into a feature So see so what'd be fair to say then that pickles is kind of a big deal Fantastic What do we get to talk about? It's a big deal What happened to you? It's a big deal. Fantastic. What do we get to pause? What happened to you? It's big deal. What happened? He lies to send my sauer about that. Ponds really are your bread and butter, Tom.

I'm just joking, you're joking. Oh. Flashing. In 1925, there was a potential for a deadly outbreak of diphtheria in Alaska. The serum to stop this was in Anchorage, and the plane that could get to Nome to deliver the serum was, which just wouldn't start. So a group decided to use dog sleds to get the medicine to the people that needed it. They would have to travel in minus 62 degree Fahrenheit. That's

50 degrees Celsius. Blizzard conditions and 674 miles. It's over a thousand kilometers to deliver it. Lots of people and dogs participated in this relay to get the medicine where it needed to be. But the one that got all the credit. And then 60% of people refused to take it. But the one that got all the credit and has a statue in New York Central Park is Balto, a Siberian husky. The Alaskan natives and the dogs that basically did two thirds of the run get glass over, but Balto was the one that was photographed after and afterwards was just hailed as a hero. But that was only for a short time,

because the dogs do their notoriety, helping the humans not die a disease, were sold off to the Vodville Circuit to live in just terrible conditions. They were basically kept barely alive and tiny little side show pens. They were eventually rescued from this super shitty life and spent the rest of their days

in the Cleveland Brookside Zoo, which actually doesn't sound much better to be honest. You kids want to go check out the dog section of the zoo? I'm assured that they've had truly terrible existences, kids. Come on, you're checking out the dog. Well, okay, so now we've learned that Cecil can even make like the Siberian Husky that saved half of Alaska into a bitter sad story. So I need a break.

And then when I get back and learn it was our own troops that were droppings of homes. Yeah, yeah, man. You've told me like a hundred times. I know the story. Oh, I'm sorry. Did you want to tell the story about the time you ate a blanket again? Oh, you don't even know. It was so dry.

Guys, guys, guys. We're supposed to be having a good time. Excuse me. I'm looking for a group of famous animals. Oh, no! Oh, no, no! How you doing, man? I'm pretty good, pretty good.

Just came back from them putting up a statue of me in New York cities. You guys hear about that? Yeah. Absolutely. Oh, man. Oh, my statue is in a training station. Oh, that's cool. I don't know about that. Oh, my statue is in a trading station. Oh, that's cool.

I don't really like trains. I kind of prefer to fly right share. Right? Yeah, it's a doll. Anyway, I can't stay long. Got a book signing this morning, you know, boring. But what are you gonna do? It's part of this publicity, right?

You know, right? Yeah. Yeah, I'm absolutely. Hey guys, am I late? Oh, um, and there are, uh, Mr. Handys. Oh, you kidn would miss this for the world? Famous animals together again. Am I right, eh?

Yeah, totally. Yup, of course. Mm-hmm, share, share. I didn't know he was coming. Don't phrasing. Right, share, share. I didn't know he was coming. Don't phrasing! Right, right, right. And we're back when we last left off. Animals had been shot, wounded with trapped no mistreated cage and thrown at a fucking tree. So see so This adorable little parachute

A peg leg for a page. I mean there's a lot of Somebody built a tree tiny little parachute. No, yeah, this is gonna work We've got a whole we got a whole like a whole loony tunes to draw from it. We could do 30 years out of this. Two weeks ago, we did a lady who starred people to death. Okay, get off my back. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

It's a tin star of animals. Next is the story of Banks horse. He lived in England in the late 1500s. The horse was named Morocco and was evidently a hell of a performer. I mean, we just did a Mr. Hands joke, C. So does it really? No, no. No.

And I just Googled Mr. Hands, Eli and I miss my sweet, sweet hands. I guess. Now you're curious. Don't do it. Just don't do it. Just don't do it. Just don't do it. Just don't do it. If you're a child, if you're a kid, we're the kid, especially if you like Jesus Christ. I see Jesus Christ. Kids, listen to this show sometimes. So let's go back to Morocco here. Morocco could walk on three legs, could lie down, play dead.

It could, it was able to pull people wearing specific things out of the audience for like, like, for instance, glasses. Morocco could distinguish between colors. It could drink a bucket of water and piss on command for clarity. It could drink a bucket of water. And then the horse would urinate on command. It wasn't a mixed bucket. I was very confused.

I guess, yeah, water and mixed bucket. Yeah, maybe I, comma, I don't know how to fix it. I don't think anyone blames you. It would, uh, it would go into the audience and pick out women that had thought were virgins and one had thought were harlots. And it would bow to the king and the queen. And it would bear its teeth like a dog and chase its owner around the stage. Oh, sure you were making me sludge shame, people banking.

Yeah, right. I'm going to make the fucking stakes. So I want to just point out that our piss jokes are really an homage to an art form that dates back to the 16th century. We're classic, guys, if you think about it, it's a lot. One famous trick which involves, would certainly involve some sort of clever slide of hand by its owner, Maraka would wait for the trainer to collect some money from the audience. Then it would count out with its hoof how much money was collected.

This act was so popular it inspired several other people to train animals and try to compete bank to out do the competition set up a show on the top of St. Paul's Cathedral, which was a great success. So then bank took the show on the road again, and it was a sensation. And in every case, Banky required everyone to exit through the gift show. Banksy. In Paris, the horse became known as Monsieur Morocco, word of its exploit spread so much that he was arrested in Paris because they thought he was a sorcerer, the owner was a sorcerer.

So they had to show them that he was using hand signals and not magic to cue the horse. Okay. In retrospect, I don't know why I did not see the fake thumb on the horse because he left Paris for Orleans and the show was huge hit. Until again, bank was charged with witchcraft. This time sentenced to burn at the stake. So then quote, banks was given a last show to redeem himself. Wait, it's so, you just had to not succeed at the trip. Right, keep going, no words keep going. It's a little different quote, continuing the quote, quote, during the performance, Morocco

knelt down before the cross, one of the pre-sound proving that he was not the double when Bank Lapuareans, he was given money and great commendations for his troubles. And quote, the war starts counting out the reward. But what did they think the devil's agenda was as a counting horse like what? I just came here to say that the guy with the magical horse was given way more of a fighting chance to prove he wasn't a sorcerer than literally anyone ever. Yeah. Horse and the dude. Today, he went.

Another horse of note was beautiful Jim Key. This horse was trained by a former enslaved person, Dr. William Key, a self-trained veterinarian. The horse could, according to Key, read and write, it could make change for a sale. It could do simple math for numbers under 30. The wiki also says it could do trigonometry, but I suspect do simple math for numbers under 30. The wiki also says it could do trigonometry, but I suspect those, the horse is two obtuse for that. Okay. She's like, you know, you've got a lot of tangent for every sign.

What a formula. Foulness function, Tom. Somebody who's seeking. Seek this. Damn it. This is close. Dr. Key said he never used a whip, but just his patience to train the horse and the horse traveled the nation, teaching children to be humane to animals.

The horse performed for President McKinley and he said, quote, this is the most, let me do it as President McKinley was saying, this is the most astonishing and entertaining exhibition I've ever witnessed. And quote, and McKinley also said that it was an example of what kindness and patience could accomplish. Cool. Yeah. And then pretty much immediately he got shot by someone he was giving up. Pretty funny.

I'm just saying. Kind of. Okay. All right. So let's be clear here like, um, fucking horse couldn't read or fucking write. Okay. Or do simple math, right? I mean, McKinley was just some dumbass.

I probably would have said the same thing about a linking rings roots. This will be great for our railroads. Pat, I got shot by a lady. Howie. The next story is Zerafa, the giraffe. The giraffe was a diplomatic gift to Charles X of France from the Ottoman viceroy of Egypt, Mehmet Alpasha, who made an appearance on our Suez Canal episode. The baby giraffe was captured in Sudan and then brought by camel to the Nile. Okay. All right. The image of a baby giraffe riding a camel goes a then brought by camel to the Nile. Okay. All right.

The image of a baby giraffe riding a camel goes a long way to make it up for all the dog getting shot by Nazi stories. We started with that. Yeah. Yeah. She went there by barge. There were three attendant cows that provided her with a daily requirement of milk, which was 25 liters.

When she made it to Alexandria, Zarafah, boarded a boat and set sail for Marseille, they had to cut a hole out of the top of the boats of the Giraffe constictate out. That's awesome. Man, that early periscope technology was weird. They decided that they were going to send her to Paris by land. So she spent the winter in Marseille and they made her this adorable yellow coat and little yellow shoes to keep her to Paris by land. So she spent the winter in Marseille. And they made her this adorable yellow coat and little yellow shoes to keep her warm in the winter. And then they set out for Paris.

And she was accompanied by her milk cows the whole way. She walked 41 days through the French countryside drawing crowds of up to 30,000 people. When she made it to Paris, she was presented to Charles X and over 100,000 people, which was about eight of the population of the city came to see her. After that, giraffes were in, giraff pottery, giraff ceramics, figurines, rugs. The color and pattern was all the rage. Even hairstyles were made super high to imitate the size of the animal. Zerafa lived 18 years

in Paris and then she died and then they stuffed her and they put her in a garden for a while and then in the natural history museum. Golden days of being a giraffe, my friends. These days, be coughed twice and they're fenial lines in front of Miss Michelson's third grade class. All right, let's end with a story of Lobo the Wolf. Lobo was a North American gray wolf that lived in New Mexico. Humans came to New Mexico and decided to kill literally all the game there. So there's no natural prey for the local wolves. Humans did bring a bunch of docile livestock with them.

So the wolves quickly took to hunting that. The local ranchers upset at the wolves for eating their animals started to set out poise and traps for the wolves, which the wolves would essentially discard. They'd eat around and them not dying and pissing off the ranchers even more. One could say that the ranchers were not jawliners. It's different. Right. The jawliners is so, but like, you know, Lobo is Spanish for wolf, right?

So at least I just, so you know, so something tells me the guys who named the wolf, you know, Lobo is Spanish for wolf, right? So at least I just so you know, so something tells me the guys who named the wolf, you know, wolf the wolf are about to get out. They put out a thousand dollar bounty on the leader of the pack, Lobo. That's about $32,000 in today's money. The trapper by the name of Ernest Thompson-Seten, Lord and by the money, decided to try for the bounty. He tried very carefully poisoning five different baits and he laid them out. The next day, all the baits were gone and he thought for sure that all I had to do was walk around and he would see the corpse.

Instead he found all five baits in a pile covered with wolf shit. That's kind of impressive. Like other stuff just to shit on my. Is that an infomer? Why? I just fell in it. No way. Tried a number of different types of traps, but he would go out and find that they were

carefully avoided or sprung and nothing was in them. Loco was basically springing all the traps here. This went on for four straight months. Cecil, I swear to God, if they don't fall in love by the end of this story. Okay. Well, while his traps are being thwarted, these four months did give earnest time to find out that Lobo had a mate. So he went about triangle.

Trapping her. He would have been with the like a mid-training basically. Yeah. Yeah. He was sitting. Lors has made in with a cattle head and he traps her. The trappers founder and Lobo was free and he was right next to her. They killed the mate and they took her to a cabin and Lobo followed. Also, in the story here, Lobo supposedly cried for like three days straight, like howling and they talk about how it's very, very sad.

I just wanted to make sure I could emphasize the sad. Yeah, I know you want to do that. Yeah, I want to do that. Yeah, sure. Yeah, that's how many pounds. No, Tom starved people to death three weeks ago. Okay. So, he just, nobody would ever believe that I would starve somebody. Nobody trapped

a guy's wife and then he showed up and there was no food. Using the made his bait, they trapped Lobo and they could have killed the wolf, but seeing the dedication that Lobo had to his mate, seat and change his mind. And they muzzleed Lobo and they took him to the ranch. Lobo died four hours later of a broken heart. But hold on, but his death had changed the heart of Satan. He grew three times. Three sizes. He dedicated his life to championing the wolf after that.

Some say the retelling of the story by Satan was what started the conservationist movement. The story is called, It's called, Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Eli, you're making the story, Seth. The story is said to have inspired the great David Addenborough. And on the scene estate is now the Academy for the love of learning, which, and here's their mission statement, quote, explores the vital connections between seat and early 20th century vision of wild nature, contemporary environmental issues and thoughtful stewardship and quote. And if you had to summarize what you learned in one sentence, what would it be?

All of these famous animals would have more Twitter followers than Eli. Just wanted to say that out loud. Oh, I have that. I've tweeted five times last two years. Anyway, are you ready for the class? So under you. Yeah, sure. Let's do this. All right, Cecil. Most of these stories were really fucking sad. But not as sad as a Eli's pugs daily struggle to breathe. as a Eli's Pugs daily struggle to breathe. So a Marchary Tyrell is every moment is agony. It's that dog is so unethical.

So unethical crazy. So that's just so many pictures awful doubts. You do a dog man or was it a purchase? I rescue you. Did you rescue you do for an amount of money? I don't know.

Pussed for you, don't know. Hey Eli, why did you go? Why did you go Eli? Who rescued you? Am I right? All right. It's cool. Oops.

It's cool. Cecil, which of the following animal biographies would you like to read the most? Hey, stop bombing yourself, you fucking idiots. I share a meme in one mission. That's fucking amazing. B, I'll stop eating your blanket if you feed me some fucking hay by Sergeant Ernest.

See, the motherfucker who was incredibly late by H.O. Or G, he was asking for it by Mr. Hands. Oh, wow. No, wow. He was, uh, anything but D? That's great. That's great. That's great.

Yeah. So, correct. Correct. What? Correct. One more for you. Which of the following is the best title? The movie about the horse who does math.

I can't wait for this. It's amazing. You see it, eh? Blue-d-will-hunting. Fan. I see it. I like that. Let's get written figures.

You see? Black, beautiful mind. Black, beautiful mind. A leg of rainman. Oh, I like it. Rainman. Oh, I like it. Rainman. Oh, yeah.

All the above, they're fucking amazing. That's correct. Hey, you win. All right. Somehow despite Rainman's Cecil is our winner. So who's doing the next essay? Oh, we're going to pick Tom next week. All right.

Well, for Cecil, Tom Eli, and he thought I'm no one thank you for hanging out with us today. We'll be back next week. All right, well for Cecil Tom Eli and Heath, I'm Noah, thank you for hanging out with us today. We'll be back next week. By then, Tom will be an expert on something else. Between now and then, you can bathe your ears in our other shows by checking the website for links. And if you'd like to help to keep this show going, you can make a per episode of Nation of Patreon.com.

So, last citation pod, or leave us a five-star wherever you can. And if you'd like to get in touch with us, check out past episodes, connect with some social media, or check the show notes, be sure to check out citationpod.com And I figure, what the hell the guy's been over, nobody's around, why not? I am begging you to please stop telling me this story. Hey, I listed your story about the bombs.

Why did I not die, God? Why did I not die? Die, God! Why did I not die?