Citation Needed - Salish Sea Human Foot Discoveries

Episode Date: March 27, 2019

Since August 20, 2007, at least 20 detachedhuman feet have been found on the coasts of the Salish Sea in British Columbia, Canada, and Washington, US. The first discovery, on August 20, 2007, was on Jedediah Island in British Columbia. Feet have been discovered on the coasts of islands in British Columbia, and in the US cities of Tacoma and Seattle.

Dude, what? How could you be Team Raja? Seriously? Well, it's, I'm a dynasty man, that's easy. Come on. You're a fuck up the choreography and lie about your dance training man is what you are. Okay, she didn't lie. Lying. Oh, strong.

Okay. Okay. There's two other devin' boards. Guys, guys, guys, stop whatever you're doing. We have to change this week's episode. Wait, what? I found a magic bottle. Wait? I found a magic bottle. Wait, you found a magic bottle.

Magic bottle, yes. So a few nights ago, I noticed all these empty bottles outside of Heathroom, and I was like, that's weird. I never even heard of this kind of juice. So I go to the store, I buy some more, and when I came back in the morning, it was gone. Guys, I have put this juice outside of Heath's room three nights in a row and every morning, when I wake up, the juice has disappeared. Eli, what was this juice? Like what was it called? It's called rum or room. I think it's supposed to be like a play on young. Like is a tasty, you like, you like, let me just,

just stop you there. That, um, um, Cecil, Cecil. That is not a bad idea for a show. Good job, buddy. Good job there. Yeah, magic. But it's good. You up, you just keep filling it, man. It's a magic bottle. That's awesome. It's good. He up. You just keep filling it, man.

It's a magic bottle. That's awesome. It's crazy. I have no idea. He doesn't know. He watched. Get scotch juice. Maybe try. Hello! Welcome to Citation, native of the podcast where we choose a subject, read a single

article about it on Wikipedia and pretend we're experts because this is the internet. That's how it works now. I'm Tom and I'll be regretting most of my life's choices in no particular order, but I'm not alone in writing my own personal tragedy joining me today are three men whose personal ring of hell has been set aside since birth, Cecil Eli and he. It's not a ring, Tom. It's not a ring, it's a wedding band. Don't worry. I do whatever I want every day. It's awesome. I'm not sure Jesus is whatever you want.

Jesus, just whatever you want. Jesus, they're amazing. How many Jesus do you want? I have, however many I want, nobody says anything. It's the best. Coastic Costco, Pretensi works for a summer camp. No questions asked. The fucking best.

I ruined my appetite for more cheese. It's nobody says shit. Nobody says anything to you, but about you is different. Yeah, it's a little. Don't care. All right. All right, well, not terribly notably absent today is Noah. Was Bizzley, I don't know, excavating an ancient Etruscan burial ground or whatever.

So, so he'll be back next week to bore us with the details of which fucking badger brush works best on 4,000 year old bone fragments. And while we all wait with baited breath to find that out. Let's stop for just a moment to thank our patron. I'm actually, Tom, I got back early, so I am here. And I still stand by what I said. So here we go. Not all of it. I thought it'd be awkward.

I wasn't. Not all of it. It's not too awkward for one of us. All right, thank you patrons. Remember, when you woke up this morning patrons, you mattered. And if you want to matter, hang out with us until the end of the show for a chance,

for us to care that you're listening. All right, with that passive aggressive dig out of the way, tell us Eli, buddy, what person, place, thing, concept, phenomenon or event? Will we be talking about today? Well, thanks to patron Christian, we'll be talking about the Salish Sea human foot discoveries. Okay.

All right. All right. Sounds feels like we knew about those before the Salish Sea. Whatever. We're all just in-finced like laying in cripple like, holy shit, I have feet. This is amazing. I sounds weirdly fetishy. So, well, I'm definitely in.

I'm in. So, see, so you read the article. You ready to jump right in and kick some knowledge out of it? I am ready to dive in feet first, Tom. That's a great plan, but clench your cheeks if it's over 20 feet. Where does the story begin, bud? Can't unclench my cheeks, Tom. That's a great plan, but clench your cheeks if it's over 20 feet. Where does the story begin, bud? Can't unclench my cheeks, Tom. It's because of the enormous girth I carry around. There are contests in the clench. That's for a very special episode of Citation. So before we get to the meat of the story, we're going to need to pick around the bone a little first.

So the Salish Sea is a channel of water that basically surrounds Vancouver Island or as I like to call it New York West, although presumably there's more trees, less garbage and better pizza. I call bullshit everywhere has less garbage than New York sea, so that's not useful signifier. All right, wait, still very confused with less garbage. Isn't that mean there's also less pizza? So you know, and this whole bitter dispute, if you should call one's would just call your thing, lasagna low for tomato cake or something like that. Right? Already has a word bread, but yeah, there you go. And then you can stop pretending that you don't love New York's amazing pizza and garbage ramparts

It's adorable that just like oh, we're arrival of New York where it's no Now when you win you're no longer the right. You're not even a silver We don't get you get nothing. I could barely hear you from Cincinnati. What did you say? You guys want some chili with green jello on it You guys want some chili with green jello on it? Huh? That would be so much better than the fucking chili day. You want to watch two lesbian's get a divorce? Let's do this thing. Come on.

Cincinnati style. That would be so much better than the chili day. Oh, God. Oh, my God. Skyline chili tastes like suicide. It's just exactly what it tastes like. And cinnamon, we're the end cinnamon. Taste amazing.

Taste like swing state. So Puget Sound makes up the southern part of the Salish Sea, and it's a waterway that connects Seattle with the Pacific Ocean. The northern body of water is the straight of Georgia, and the western part of the sea is the straight of Wanda Fuka. The other port cities include Vancouver, Tacoma, Bellingham, Port Angeles, and Victoria. Yeah, and by the way, he had a really funny comment here,

but then he erased it and protested a season not using an Oxford comma in that list. Is there a city called Port Angeles and Victoria? That's a weird name for a city. Yeah, it's just dumb. It's like Bosnia and Herzegovina kind of thing. The sea itself is about 18,000 square kilometers, which is a little bigger than Lake Ontario,

the runt of the Great Lakes litter. The sailor sea is actually a pretty recent term for this body of water, coined in 1988 by marine biologist and a Truscant Enthusias Bert Weber. He, quote, created the name for the combined waters in the region with the intention to complement the name's Georgia straight, Puget Sound and straight of Wandafuka, not replace them." And to erase awareness of this ecosystem, an ecosystem that we will find out in a moment here has a foot fetish.

Interesting. You walk onto a beach and the sand is like, exfoliate the fuck out of that epidermis. We used socks and he used socks. Come on. Anyway, to spice things up a bit, I wanted to read a particularly sad entry from the Salah Sea wiki page quote, the plight of the Southern resident orca in the Salah Sea has attracted global attention as these fish eating whales are starving due to low salmon populations.

Video footage showed an orca named telequa who carried her dead calf on her head for more than a thousand miles over 17 days before parting with it. And quote, that's rough. I want to hear that squeak fight on the 17th day though. Why are we feeling sorry for the fucking city? Ah, humans, the only animal to film a starving creature carrying its dead young I feel sorry for the fucking shit. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha I know that whale was just fucking showing off for attention. Oh, look at me. My baby's dead. Sad face whale blah blah blah. My grief and viral. Find me and go find me.

Real fucking sad. Call me when your kids live and you have to get up every morning on every Saturday, full of sad for lucky fucking whale. I don't, I may have steered us a little off. Of course, that was, I That was my bad see so funny. All right now we know Where and what the Salish see is I'm not regretting my whole life tell us about these discoveries man I don't know a little more not so fast not so fast. We're gonna cover this but to give some perspective

I wanted to talk about other weird shit that is washed ashore from the ocean. Uh, you're doing this on... Poypus, aren't you? Poypus. Poypus. Well, I can't rule that out, Tom. Ha ha ha ha ha. Yes. So I found several oddities that have washed ashore all over the world.

I found them conveniently bundled in a mental floss article. So, uh, let's start with the sentimental. The year's 2012, and in the distant and terrible lands in New Jersey, a stack of love letters washes it short. I don't like messages in a bottle. I didn't know that. These letters are from 70 years prior,

and were sent during World War II. They were love letters between a gentleman in the military and a woman back home, and they span five years from 1942 until 1947. The thing is that no one's really sure where the letters came from. Yeah, I'm going to guess the western one. They gave the letters to the niece of the people involved and at one point they mentioned that the lady who they're addressed to is still alive. She's 91 and in a nursing home. So she has no idea where her putting cup is let alone how these letters got in the drink. He didn't come to brunch with her shitty

friends. That's how they. I love they washed up on the Jersey shore. I'm just trying to imagine like a Jersey shore love letter like, oh,, you're so beautiful, your tits, they're like two boobs that none of my buddies even believe a fake, you know, like when we smash that cum so fast, because I've been dreaming of your hyper extended pucker-dass whole duck lips smile all awake. You're the only girl I loved all day. Okay, people in Jersey don't know the word hyper extended, Tom, that's a ridiculous exaggeration. So next, in 2011, there was a woman from Hampshire, England, Margaret Wells. Well, she had someone breaking her house and steal a life-size ET replica.

She had it, she had it because her daughter built it as part of a stage and makeup class, likely story. Exactly. Exactly. Alright. Funny coincidence. It's also the third best-selling real doll. So, he... Yeah, second is Yoda, which is weird. Anyway. Well, you would have thought the one with the magic finger would outsell yo that. Not Yoda can get it.

Belly's lighting up. What's going on? You could choke fuck yo. You know what I'm saying? Yoda's going to put it down. So not sure what happened, but a person's walking by the beach and saw it on the shore and then called the authorities That had to be a weird 9-11 call by the way Anyway miss Wells went to pick up the doll and my favorite part is the quote from Margaret here quote I always knew ET would come home I'm just so confused by this though. So somebody saw that ET replica and we're like, I wanna steal that thing and fucking in a boat.

That's happening. Right? Spoiler alert, that's the reason for 100% of this episode. Oh shit. All right, but okay, but the weirdest part of this story is that someone reported this discovery to the authorities. Right, I mean. Yeah. is that someone reported this discovery to the authorities, right? I mean,

y'all weren't doing anything. Were you? 2011, who tsunami killed almost 16,000 people and did about $300 billion in damage to the Japanese coastline. A survivor of that tsunami had lost his home and three members of his family. He also lost a van down by the river he was using as a storage shed. About a year later, that van washed ashore in British Columbia over 3,000 miles away inside was his Harley Davidson, Harley tracked down the owner and transported it back to Japan

and repaired it for him. By the way, while we're here with the whole Harley company, you want us to build you guys a nuclear reactor that's like a giant motorcycle or something? What do you want to do? Because that'd be way safer than what you got going right now. I gotta be honest. Right. I just love the idea that I'm showing up with a bike and him being like, did you find anything

of my family? A new bike. Huh? How great is that? Remember that bike? It's got to, bike. Brum Brum. That's how it sounds.

Your family's dead. So there's a story about a couple kids playing on the beach in Florida in 1896. They stumble across a big ass, Cheelle Flemte, Carcus, and still. They think it's a whale. Other people think it's an octopus and wacky 1900s cryptozoologists think it's some kind of monster.

They might have calling it St. Augustine's monster because either the cryptozoologists won out the naming rights or they just figured St. Augustine's whale is a boring name. Well, actually that name's already taken. The Augustine was fucking. In any case, they cut off samples this thing and they sent it around and the, it's an octopus. No, it's a whale chant lasts about a hundred years until we finally cared enough to have it tested in a modern lab in 2004. It was a whale.

So, no, no, no, I think about it. It really isn't that strange thing to be washed as short, because whales really aren't known for being on land and alive. So, I guess. But when you think about it, isn't this really about the friends we made a long away? Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Now their entry in the article is also something about it. Isn't this really about the friends we made a long away? Another entry in the article is also something you think you'd find in the sea. Just attached to something. A giant eyeball. In 2012, again in Florida, a giant eye washes ashore. And this is like a softball sized eye. So it's pretty big. No mention on whether or not they threw the oleira on the horn before bringing in a wild live fishals. But the eye was of a very large swordfish. Okay. So another ocean thing. I don't know. Stuff in the middle ends up on the sides sometimes. Like, I don't know that. It's a weird list from mental floss. Like what? And number three, hydrogen hydroxide was found.

Well, and again, the weirdest thing is that it was reported, right? Like somebody's just like, is any really big fillers gone missing? See, so this is why we lie. You got to be like, you know what else washed up? A baseball diamond. What? Now you got to be. You know that's not a kind of diamond, right? No.

Don't worry, Cecil. I understand. And I got you. All those in favor of more flots and tails say, I. I. I. Three best friends. Look at us. I prefer you. All those in favor, more flots and tails. Say I. I I I prefer Jackson. The eyes have it. In 1992, a shipping container accidentally dropped 29,000 rubber ducks into the ocean.

The ship. This is amazing. The ship left Hong Kong and lost the duck somewhere in its journey across Pacific Ocean. The ducks have traveled all over the world and some have wound up 17,000 miles from where they started. They should drop like a bunch of Ernie dolls from Sesame Street. These dolls have been founded Australia, Hawaii, South America, Western and Eastern United States and the UK. They were even wrote a book about it called Moby Duck. Oh, historically accurate shit tits.

Is anybody at all really think that that was an accident? No, it's like on the bug. What's in that crate? Rubber ducks. I know I'm getting fired up. I'm in trouble. Fuck it. Robert ducks. I know I'm getting fired up. In 2011, a Navy training mind washed ashore again in Florida. Training people flipped out when a five foot long mine was discovered. They called the police. The police, of course,

evacuated the beach and called the Navy. They told the public not to worry about it. It was inert and had come from an off-shar training. Yeah, cool. Maybe we label those from now on. I just, not a real bomb. Right, really big letters. So then if you make a bomb, what you just write not a real bomb on it,

is like, ah, go, don't say it now. I can't do my plan. Great. You use a special font. Comic sand. Lebeddings. I love the idea though of a guy like walk it up, pass the police signs and just grab in this thing and walk away like he's

taking out trash cans. Yeah. Everybody's like, what? Man. So we have giant pretend minds that occasionally come on more than float randomly about the Atlantic hard to see how that goes wrong. No. All right, 2011 was a banner year when it came to shit on Morden float randomly about the Atlantic. Hard to see how that goes wrong. I know. No kidding.

All right, 2011 was a banner year when it came to shit washing up. A hundred World War II bombs came ashore and hampshore again. What? No word if that ET replica was writing one. In any case, they were live fucking bombs and they had to get the British Navy out there

to detonate them. Okay, I mean, I get they had to use the Navy. I feel like they could have found some Nazis to deal with that to make it fair. Like, I'm making smoke the whole bag type of thing. Like, we can send you some next time. We're gonna have some bomb Nazis over there for you. This blew me away. Like, I had no idea bombs floated.

Like, I'm picturing God desperately trying to flush the ocean, like, gotta get him to go down, people are coming in, why do you use the guest ocean now? Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid. Something that washes up from the ocean that's basically a gross ass golden ticket is Amber Greece. This is a substance that's produced in a whales and testins and then it's vomited up. I guess it smells terrible so we decided to use it in expensive perfumes. The stuff acts like a fixer for the perfume,

a fixing the scent to the skin for a longer period of time. In any case, the stuff is worth a fortune. One person found a six pound clump of it and it was worth $180,000. I was that happened. Somebody's like, all right, well, this perfume is fading way too fast. I've got an idea. Yeah. I will need a whale and some yager. Okay, great. The scent is definitely not fading anymore, but neither are the whale vomit underpants.

Yeah, another in the long line of somebody did that first things for me to wonder about when I'm trying to sleep, right? So speaking of shit, that's worth a fortune in May of 2015, a 66 pound bundle of cocaine washed ashore in Galveston, Texas. I guess finding quantities of drugs washing ashore is also a somewhat common occurrence, but just not an abundal that big. They wind up in the water when a drug boat capsizes or when the traffickers throw the drugs overboard

to avoid getting caught with them. Yeah, but you know whoever turned that in did not get their $8,976,000 worth, right? Yeah. Yeah, I feel like they're on the phone with a 911 operator and they're like, never turned that in, did not get their $8,976,000 worth, right? Yeah, I feel like they're on the phone with a 911 operator and they're like, well, how big a bun to listen? And he's like, how quick are you guys gonna get here? Great, awesome.

Cecil, now we all have to help Heath move to Galveston. So it makes the perfume stand my skin whatever What are their delights does the sea hold for a sea soul? This is amazing in Siberia 2018 a fisherman found not one not two but 54 severed hands on shore it is popular fishing spot There were initially rumors that this was a crazed killer's collection or that the Russian mob at a hand-chopping spree, but it turned out the local forensic lab had lost the bag of hands like us.

These hands were kept as a way of identifying people and then they were, quote, improperly disposed of. All right, we can lose track of these dead bodies. What if we chop off their hands, roll with me, and then we match up the hand with the corpse if we get a mixed up as a new system. I mean, we could also save the finger prints. That would. No, the finger tips too small. We'll lose them hands, which we're doing. I said, prints, not tips. Too late, I already agreed on hands.

Guy likes him, he's like, which body is this? He pulls out a giant ring full of hands, like a keeling. I was like, fuck the two of it. Like a giant ring? No, it's not it. Yeah. Eastern European guy, give one sick and I find it. All right, so finally, a shipping container filled with Lego bricks was lost at sea and

4.8 million Lego pieces were dumped in the ocean in 1997 and they've been found in England, Wales, in Ireland. Scientists confirmed that of the 4.8 million pieces, not one of them was the one they needed. Damn it! Ha ha ha! Where? And each one of those 4.8 million was found

by a parent trying to walk on the beach late at night looking for the goddamn bathroom. Ha ha ha ha! Yeah, right, I mean, as we'll learn eventually, there are human feet floating around in that ocean. That is fucking cruel. He has nothing on these assholes. Well, now that we have a firm footing, we can go to break in the big, being going to

break with a clean cut and come back and talk about the world's largest footpath. Yeah, from the bag big bag of hands that we have it's our system for identifying stuff. Yeah, no, no, I don't I don't think that's a great idea. So yeah, probably it's best to just not run that test Just okay, what's not a good idea? I didn't even say my idea yet. Yeah, but the Carson case, right? The Carson case really no just, just try something else. It says something else, something different, different things. It's really only, I just, what is really good with the hands, dude? It's always, it's hands, hands, hands. All you do is need hands out of the big bag of hands.

Yeah, seriously, I mean, you're obsessed with the fucking back of hands. It's like, you're working here one night and then you got horn hands, so you fucked that back of hands, but that was amazing. so you brought Frank here at night to show him then the bag I filled it too much come then you threw it away. It's probably you are so you didn't like that Yeah, that is That's what I'm like honestly, yeah, you are kind of like that Okay So you guys fucking back at hands and throw in the ocean? Yeah.

I mean, it was like proud surfing with just your penis. Awesome. Mm-hmm. Ah. All right, well, that hit a little too close to home, so let's never think about it again or attempt to run for public office that ship is safe. That's already a body. I believe you were telling a story of severed feet to go with the serving and hand job. We all just endured. That's so there have been at least 20 detached feet that have watched a shore in the

sailor sea in a 12 year time period. Detached ones. Interesting. Yeah. I mean, the Jersey Shore had way more in that period, but mostly attached. So yeah, yeah. I love that you're hedging your bets with that at least. Yeah. So I'm not going to go through every one, but I'll mention a number of them.

Starting in 2007 in August, a girl was visiting Jebadi Island, reaches down, grabs a shoe, a size 12 adidas to be exact. She sees there's a sock inside, opens that, finds a man's right foot. The shoe was made in 2003, and the remains were identified as a man who went missing, who also was suffering from depression. Okay. What's the winning scenario she was hoping for when she checked that? Right?

Gold inside the shoe, fucking whale vomit. What, like, I don't understand. There's no win. I don't even know why she's probably fucking depressed too if I lost my foot. Or die. So then in August of the following year, a size 12 re-buck washed up on Gaboria Island, and it was found by a couple, which probably were in date night. Or made date night amazing.

Right couple. This foot was deemed to have disarticulated due to decay. The shoe was a worldwide model that was popular around three years prior in 2004, but it was primarily sold in North America. This foot has since gone unclaimed. So normally some guy shows up and is like, fuck yeah, no, that's totally mine. I've been walking in circles. That's my foot. Well, the prince has to come up and be like, all right, let me check. Let me check. Oh, my God. This is embarrassing. You guys have no idea how many questions I get about this.

This is something else picturing like a barrel full of like foot-filled shoes in the lost and found at the beach just rummaging through. Some girls looking for engagement rings. No. No. It's just Pete, lady. Okay, look again. You find it? No, someone stole that. Take a piggy, leave a piggy. That makes sense.

Some asshole walks away with three feet. Well, you with the snow, there would be even no need for this. So six months later, in February of 2008, a size 11 Nike was found on Beldez Island. The shoe is of a type sold in the United States and Canada in 2003. They were able to determine the owner of this foot. The wiki says, quote, the remains were identified as a 21 year old man reported missing four years prior whose death is considered not suspicious, indicating either misadventure or suicide. Not suspicious.

It was one of those mundane missing person foot chopping scenarios. Later that same year in June, two hikers found the man's right foot floating in the water on a different. These all seem pretty commonplace. Our feet particularly severable. Okay, the line with determination and in the right embassy, everything is several. On Kirkland Island in May of that same year, a woman's right foot. Blue and white, new balance shoe was found inside. You guessed it, was a sock inside that. A foot. The shoe was manufactured in 1999.

They found the second shoe to this pair in 2011 in British Columbia, and they identified as a woman who jumped from the Pettulo bridge in 2004. Okay, I figured it out. There's a fish, right? And he just keeps swimming up to his body and he's like, dude, dude, I'm going to do another one. Watch. I'm going to break out. In August of 2008, a very good year for severed foot discovery, it seems. I feel like we define good very differently. Zero would be good. Yeah. My end. A man's black size 11 shoe washed up on a beach. A lucky camper found this one and was covered in seaweed.

Why are people going over to investigate loose shoes? What is happening in your life that you're like, I'm checking that out. I'm just no size 11 black Reebok. I'm missing one of these. Anyway, the reports seem to indicate that this shoe is probably from Canada and then set sale into the sale of sea. My favorite line from this entry is quote, testing confirmed that the foot was human. What were you trying to rule out, Ernie?

You know what, fuck you, Wikipedia. I just tagged that shit citation needed. You say stupid shit. I'll make you prove it, wiki nerds. I am the c-line of your website. Next up, a man's white and blue-sized nine runner was found in August of 2011. The man, she was the first they mentioned that had a leg attached up to the knee. That's exciting. I guess all these thus far had disarticulated at the ankle. They suspected that this, this our, disarticulation

occurred naturally due to the water. I'm sorry, naturally. Like if you stay in the back too long your foot falls off. I don't know about the hiker who fights it. So it's like, uh, knee attached, not ripe yet. But I was back. It's more time. There's got to be a cop up there who's like trying to figure this out. And he's like up to the knee. I he's got like a pegboard with yarn and push pins. And one picture. What does

it make sense? In November of 2011, a size 12 right foot hiking boot was found with a foot inside. It was discovered in a freshwater lake just off the straight of Georgia. They were determined that the boot and the foot belong to a local fisherman who get this went missing 24 years earlier in 1987. The wiki says, quote, please believe that the foot separated naturally from the body and do not suspect fall play. And quote, naturally separated that break up wasn't anyone's fault. Sometimes you do fall out of love with your foot. I'm a police officer. It was mutual. It was the first it was a trial separation and then we got back to you. Foot never calls any more. It's like a whole

time. Next month, the December in Lake Union in Seattle, a foot with a leg bone attached was found in a black plastic bag under a bridge. They couldn't figure out what the cause of death or who it belonged to. And I'm going to throw out a wild guess here and that it wasn't a terrible sack race, Miss. So we're the police have decided this was a natural foot removal again. I'm being murdered by murder. Right now, nobody, nobody looked perfectly natural. Nostrial things happening.

This is suspicious. Nothing to see here. Then lots of my relatives die and rot in the ocean. Naturally, see so anymore. Totally not foul play involved floaters. Normal just throw grandma in the water. Fuck it. A month later in January at the waterline in a dog park in Vancouver,

quote, the remains of what appears to be human bones inside of boot were discovered. End quote, I suspect they have to rule out other bones. I don't get dog bones. Yeah, because it really could be any boot wearing mammal. I just want to stuff some dinosaur bones into a boot and throw it in the huge sound and fuck with these guys. So now we go almost two years with any reported detached feet, until a foot in a white new balance, size 10.5 men's shoe was discovered in Seattle along the shoreline.

It was found in May of 2014, and this model of shoe was available for sale in 2008. But fuck sick, we gotta start reading these things like goddamn tealies at this point, like white new balance, Velcro. See a ceiling fan and extension cord in your future. Oh wow. This is good.

I mean, I feel like at this point, there's gotta be at least some people chopping off their feet and toss them at Puget Sound just to fit in. I wasn't trying to get it going. Parachus with the feet inside were found a week apart two years later in February of 2016. They were both found on Vancouver Island and the corner confirmed the match in May of 2018, a man walking along Gabriola Island,

found a hiking boot with a foot inside a log jam. Okay, everybody, maybe we just stop hiking around here, huh? We're all just gonna find another hiking spot. Okay. And that fucking guy with the metal detector that hasn't found a single thing other than the cure for getting the fuck away from his wife is just Chuckling to himself like At least they never found a

What's this condom in a bunch of seaweed over here? I will investigate further Do you guys this tastes like human come Do you guys, does this taste like human come? Is this the thing? Let's take the lab. The fuck is happening. These discoveries keep on keeping on too. In January of this year, they found the remains of a foot in a boot in Everett, Washington, that at a DNA test

and found it belonged to a man that had gone missing two years earlier. I feel like belonging to the dude is basically the same as was the dude in this instance. But okay, okay. That's why. The number of found feet was described as astounding and beyond explanation. But that was, it was described like that when they had only found five feet in 2008.

The article says, quote, finding two feet has been given a million to one odds and has thus been described as an anomaly. Well, two of the same guy. Yeah. That's higher. The finding of the third foot made it for the first time. Three such discoveries had been made so close to each other.

The fourth discovery caused speculation about human interference and statistically was called curious, end quote. How are we calculating these odds? Yeah, run over how many things could wash up on shore, multiplied by one over how many body parts we have. We have to do it. I hear. No, that's not how they're calculating.

You can pull that one out. That's definitely not it. That's how I would do it. They got to have a metric for this. Like, you guys, this is like 22 rubber dox and a Lego worth a weird. I like that they had different names. Like I want to see their statistics scale. Like, okay, move the needle further.

Nope. Yeah, all the way to curious. You got it. All right. Curious. So it's hard to determine where these feet have come from. Because if you remember from earlier in the show, we talked about all kinds of things that wind up in the sea and drift half a world away.

T-composing human feet also produce a soap-like substance from body fat called adiposeeer, which thwarts forensic experts because it makes it harder for them to identify any clues. And don't Google adipseer, by the way. Just so-play. Keep, thank you. Cecil, so-play. No, so-play. You cannot keep a skull in our shared bathroom.

Absolutely. All right, Heath, you don't like it, but that's not the same as Kant. Two votes. Different one. Two to one. Also, the article says that the human body can remain in the water intact for 30 years.

So using the shoes to determine the age is really sometimes the only thing they have to go on. And while hands and feet do commonly decompose and disarticulate from the body and water, they normally don't float. It's suspected that the shoes have a bit of air in them and that's what's carrying these feet off like a message in a bottle. I am 100% gonna write notes in all of my shoes, blaming different people for my murder.

Like if you find this shoe, then I am dead. My aunt is gonna be, welcome all. One interesting theory on where these feet originated is that they may have come from the Asian tsunami in December of 2004. Many of the shoes were sold in 2004 earlier, and the ocean currents have a northward tendency from that part of the world.

So it could be that some of these shoes were from a disaster across the Pacific. Well, except that we identified a bunch of them as like, you know, dude, who was in this wooden and then died. I feel like a theory that explains some of the disartigulated feet creates more questions than an answer. I say one interesting thing and Noah shits on it. Thanks Noah.

Appreciate it. Next time say two interesting things. I know that's a lot of one that's a man. You've been limiting yourself to zero every assay. Oh That's a lot of one essay man You've been limiting yourself to zero every assay We get shit on all right Cecil if you had to summarize what you've learned in one sentence But what would it be walk on the ocean step on the stones flesh becomes water would becomes bone Toad the wetsprocket killed all those people guys that's Tote the wetsprocket killed all those people guys. That's

Alright, see, so are you ready to stomp some sense into the panel and kick off the quiz? Absolutely. Let's do it. Alright Cecil It's obvious that the sailor's C need some of the TV movie treatment What should the TV show slash movie about this phenomenon be called a But loose slash movie about this phenomenon be called a foot loose be told a line see this is where I start stretching get ready feet the parents a hill monsters

what? I didn't get there I don't know. There's a mictune from the 90s. No, but it's the mictune. Oh my God. Someone in my generation is like, what? No, they're not. I don't even know that they're impressed with me.

Shupacabra. I'm going to go with, I'm going to go with secret answer, E, Solman 2 arch enemies. I think that's cool. Oh, that is correct. All right. I, this is obviously the right question at this point. Cecil, what's the solution to this great mystery? Hey, the cobbler's assistant misunderstood. I need 20 feet of shoe leather in the most tragic of ways. Be, after a long

day, I hiking by the sea. Sometimes you just don't have it in you to untie both shoes. See Sasquatches also sometimes make fake human footprints, but they're way more hard for about it. Or D, you've been planning this episode for a while. I'm going to say to subject on D there, and I'm going to go with A. And for the record, foot cobbler is the worst cobbler flavor. Just want to put it on. I will be to Andrew. Subjectives say that you were right that it is. Yeah. Right.

False skyline chili is the worst flavor of cobbler. Actually, it's definitely pretty good with this. Truce will topping. All right. Uh, shit. Well, if I were a better man, I would maybe like rewrite a tongue twister about finding things down by the seashore and do it like a hilarious way that combines a well-known verse with some kind of like fun verbal puns and linguistic trickery and

maybe even weave in a diabetes joke for good measure, but I won't be doing any of that. Why not? Hey, I'm not that cleaver. Ah. That's fun there. Secret answer B, Felix found Felicities for a second foot and falsely confused it for flotsam. I got it, it's gone.

Okay, I'm supposed to win, but your answer was amazing, but I still win because that's how the show works So I get to torture Eli next Eli you're up buddy. Yeah All right, well for Heath Cecil and Eli I Did make it Tom. I stand by what I said for Heath Cecil and Eli I'm Tom thank you for hanging out with us today, and know it doesn't count. We'll be back next week, and by then Eli will have completed his Mule the Report of Lies. We now and then you can find all of our other products by heading over to CitationPod.com,

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Please stop. Like midnight tag for your meat hawk. You guys are fired. Just like a- like a sorority house of Hojo's. Just please stop. Please stop. Like midnight tag for your meat hawk. You guys are fired. Aww.