Citation Needed - The Assassination of Archduke Franz Ferdinand

Episode Date: May 17, 2017

Only four episodes in and we've worked "ass" in to the title twice.   The assassination of Archduke Franz Ferdinand of Austria, heir presumptive to the Austro-Hungarian throne, and his wife Sophie, Duchess of Hohenberg, occurred on 28 June 1914 in Sarajevo when they were shot dead by Gavrilo Princip. Princip was one of a group of six assassins (five Serbs and one Bosniak) coordinated by Danilo Ilić, a Bosnian Serb and a member of the Black Hand secret society. The political objective of the assassination was to break off Austria-Hungary's South Slav provinces so they could be combined into a Yugoslavia. The assassins' motives were consistent with the movement that later became known as Young Bosnia. The assassination led directly to the First World War when Austria-Hungary subsequently issued an ultimatum to the Kingdom of Serbia, which was partially rejected. Austria-Hungary then declared war, triggering actions leading to war between most European states. In charge of these Serbian military conspirators was Chief of Serbian Military Intelligence Dragutin Dimitrijević, his right-hand man Major Vojislav Tankosić, and the spy Rade Malobabić. Tankosić armed the assassins with bombs and pistols and trained them. The assassins were given access to the same clandestine network of safe-houses and agents that Malobabić used for the infiltration of weapons and operatives into Austria-Hungary. The assassins, the key members of the clandestine network, and the key Serbian military conspirators who were still alive were arrested, tried, convicted and punished. Those who were arrested in Bosnia were tried in Sarajevo in October 1914. The other conspirators were arrested and tried before a Serbian court on the French-controlled Salonika Front in 1916–1917 on unrelated false charges; Serbia executed three of the top military conspirators. Much of what is known about the assassinations comes from these two trials and related records. From wikipedia:  https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Assassination_of_Archduke_Franz_Ferdinand_of_Austria

Hello and welcome to Cytation Needed, the podcast where we choose a subject, read a single Wikipedia article about it, and pretend we're experts. Because this is the internet, and that's how it works now. I'm Cecil, and I'll be guiding you through this limitless orifice of wiki knowledge, but because I have to do all the work on the show, I'm going to get some help on this one damn it. So, joining me from a city that doesn't differentiate between street food and restaurant food because both places have the same amount of garbage in them No illusions and he then right

Thanks Tom my Turn on's My turn on's include short walks on the beach Everyone's into fucking distance walking no fuck that short walk Ridiculous. I'm sorry. I've got a backup just a second here. You can talk all this shit you want about me, but let's not impune the integrity of New York's thriving. I have no running water at this booth

and yet I'm serving you food industry. Okay. Some lines you don't cross. On its best day, everything tastes like Purell. Like that's what you know that it's okay. Like I'm not going to get sick, or I'm not going to get sick, or you've already heard one of them, but also pausing their ongoing debate on whether or not diarrhea counts as calisthenics. If you use a squatty potty, please welcome my friend, Tom, and the winner of the greater Long Island speed-shitting competition, Eli.

Thank you. thank you. Thank you. I don't know. I feel like speed-shitting is like magic, the gathering tournaments. I think we're all losers. The flavors aside. Like, I don't know if it counts, but according to the Fitbed, and I spent a diarrhea, is indistinguishable from a proper workout.

Or a win. Thanks a lot. Just saying there's a lot of sweating. Also according to the people at my planet fitness. I like planet fitness because everybody is about planet size. Yeah. Okay, fellas, we're about to drop some knowledge. But before we did, I wanted to thank our patron supporters for making the show possible.

If you want to know how to join their ranks, stick around until the end of the show. And with that other way, Tom, tell us what person place thing event concept or phenomenon brings us together today. Well, today, Cecil, we're going to be talking about the assassination of Archduke Frames Ferdinand. I just feel like a nail man. And he since we make an arbitrary decision on who goes next, you have the honor of kick things off, you read the Wikipedia article on the assassination. I noticed he didn't qualify that with entire. So yes. Here next, but now teach us all there is to know. All right. So Franz Ferdinand Carl Ludwig Joseph Maria was born December 18th, 18th.

Eight-Mail three. And he was born into the hazardous occupation of heir apparent to the throne of Austria Hungary. And if you need a visual image, he looks like live action von Kaiser from Punch Out, like an example, like exactly like that. For those at home, for whom peeing is easy all the time, Punch Out was a boxing game about racism.

Yeah. Yeah. Just fought the different races. Yeah. And then you do. You fought the stereotypes. It was like the beach races. And then you thought you thought the stereotypes to be trace. It was amazing. And I actually had a white guy one.

Exactly. Yeah. Exactly. She know, I had him down. I's a fat eb farmed with an else marriage and mustache. From Ferdinand, Carl, Ludwig, Joseph, Maria. Yeah. We've got collecting names for later use for some reason. I'm going to need this one for later. This is my saving name. All right. So here's the story. In June of 1914, it begins and Archduke Franz Ferdinand decided to make a trip to Sarajevo. That makes Gilgons trip looks straight up unfaithful.

But before we get to that, I want to take you all the way back to the 1878 Treaty of Berlin, which said that Austria-Hungary had a mandate to occupy and administer the Ottoman vile yet of Bosnia, even though technically the Ottoman Empire still claims sovereignty over it. Sure. He gets time travel powers and he takes us to 19th century Bosnia. Is anybody else already spacing out? Because I don't know where any of these places are and I'm not really convinced they're

real. All right. So also worth mentioning, the same treaty made an autonomous state out of Serbia and they quickly became a nationalistic militarized government that was really pissed at Austria Hungary about their occupation of Bosnia. And this led to an outbreak of assassination attempts against Austro-Hungary about their occupation of Bosnia. And this led to an outbreak of assassination attempts against Austro-Hungarian officials in the region. Many of them were actually successful, starting in the early 1900s. Well, maybe an assassination vaccine would have halted that outbreak,

or maybe it would have given them a lot ofism. I don't know how to say that's not the dumbest claim about vaccinations I've heard this week and And no additional amount of sarcasm by the way would have gotten Just keeps missing because he's looking at his shoes The getaway driver is a very good driver. You can't show that anybody during the lock. So, uh, it was just by the way our hilarious. All right.

So that was somebody's child. Is is Tom forever actually forever. No, not of me and Peter Singer have our way. Everybody check out miracle mineral solution. I thought we weren't doing eugenics this. I've only decided against you, Jen. All right. So back to the story, when did the light go out of Franz's eyes?

I guess that's what I was. All right. So in 1913, Austrian, Hungarian, Emperor, Franz Joseph, are they all Franz? Are there a lot of Franz? A lot of Franz's. Yep. And so Franz Joseph, and I'm assuming he was pissed about how unwieldy their

Eminem was. He ordered Archduke Ferdinand to observe annual military maneuvers in Bosnia scheduled for June of 1914. And since nothing listens to ladies like military maneuvers in a hostile occupied territory, Sploosh. He just had to bring his wife Sophie along for the trip. Oh, this story ends with Sophie making a choice as well. The casket design. Can you just brother there so there wouldn't be a bunch of pictures of strange women licking him when she wasn't there on Facebook? You don't know. You don't know.

You know, when you try to turn a business trip into a romantic little getaway, You don't know. You don't know. You don't know. You don't know. You don't know. You don't know. You don't know. You don't know. You don't know. You don't know. You don't know. You don't know. You don't know.

You don't know. You don't know. You don't know. You don't know. You don't know. You don't know. You don't know. You don't know.

You don't know. You don't know. You don't know. You don't know. You don't know. You don't know. You don't know. You don't know. We're near as excited as members of a dissident Serbian nationalist group called the black hand. Because that sounds scary to white people. It's the black hand. Oh, no, it's the black hand doesn't sound scary when it's in chains or a ninja uniform. Yeah. Then they can only attack you one at a time or or up in the air in an obvious sinus.

No, never mind. Wait. Sorry. Sorry. Either way, Dan Errol approves either way eugenics is next week. So the black hand is going to play the part of the villain in the story. I guess. But also the part of the keystone cops as you'll soon find out it It's pretty ridiculous. Basically, there were a group of dissidents in Bosnia that had Serbian backing. They had access to weapons, and they had some serious guerrilla training, which is a shame because they'd come off as much less stupid if they were just a bunch of untrained yoke. Now that you have mastered the sword, you must master Yakini sats.

Very flinchy. When you can take the arch duke from the palm of my black hand, the student has become the master. Yes. So these guys decide to murder the arch duke. And after a series of comically inept efforts to get proper weapons, like they were the idiots from lock stock into smoking barrels, they finally get themselves armed and choose Sarajevo as the side of the assassination.

Sarajevo, if you lived here, you'd be assassinated by now. Actually, no, now the story ends and the proficiency of Bosnian assassins. You probably just fine, actually. Yeah, right. Okay. So, uh, this is where I'll introduce Gavrilo Princeip hi Gavrilo. No, I don't like new people Princeip he's a member of young Bosnia and He grew up as a peasant farmer in a place that seemed backwards compared to other parts of

19th century Bosnia. No, I literally can't even imagine a place more backwards than 19th century Bosnia, except possibly 21st century Bosnia. Yeah, not great. And he looks like, he looks like a parsnip came to life as Casey Affleck. And like a parsnip and Casey Affleck, he needs assault. What we're saying is everyone who comes from those two places are rapists, boss, and boss rapist boss. Yeah. All right. So a couple of other fun facts about princip. He was the second of nine children and six of them died in infancy. And he'll eventually wind up as the trigger man.

Ah, trigger warning. Yeah. Six of them died in infancy six. When you bury half a dozen infants, I'm thinking that all you're raising are trigger maps. Yeah. So a little bit more about the eventual shooter. He was a sickly child, but by all accounts, a decent student, at least when he wasn't attacking his classmates with a

knuckle duster. And he was expelled from school in 1912, but oddly enough, not for the knuckle duster stuff. Actually, it was for participating in a demonstration against Austro-Hungarian authorities. I just want to point out that we are raising a nation of pussies by comparison. Infernalized by safe spaces. Yes. After getting expelled, he walked 170 miles to Belgrade. He was actually 830 miles short of his goal of falling down at your door.

As it turns out, he doesn't have something exactly like a protest. Well, he walked 170 miles to Belgrade because he wanted to join the Serbian gorillas fighting the Ottoman Turks. Now, I know that you mean gorillas with a U, but in my imagination, you don't. That would be so much more fun. Oh, racist. Dicks out for the Ottoman turk gorillas. Why are there still Ottoman turk gorillas? No, all right.

So he eventually, he eventually made the team with the Serbian gorillas. But at first, he got rejected for being too small and too weak. The E-Li-Bosni story. What's still mean? Or the lying Bosnian story. And I was hoping this is where he started his people to kill list if he hadn't done that already. Mine started with Amanda Binds.

I get it. Never returned my letters. I died before I could have her. Pretty sure she's still alive, dude. She's dead to me. And all of us, one of the last time you checked on Amanda Bines, never. Never. The day she dies, you're going to go, oh. When you, when you die later this episode, I'm going to go, I'm going to go. All right. So back to the story eventually,

some kind of enterprising revolutionary must have recognized the orange Duke assassinating potential in government principle, because after several months, bombing back and forth between Belgrade, it's Harry A, he bit us to join the Black Hand and become one of their assassins. Aw, just like Rudy. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Take a quick break for everyone's favorite mid-episode, use of interstitial music, apropos of nothing. Next. Good evening, sir. Name? Gabriel Princeip. Okay, Gabriel, why do you want to join the black hand?

Because I'm still pissed off about shit that happened in 1167. Okay, okay, good answer. And what position are you applying for? A sesion. Gotcha. Okay, good answer. And what position are you applying for? S-s-s-in. Gotcha. Now, do you have any special skills that would be relevant to that position? Well, I'm pretty good with a knuckle duster. A knuckle duster? Yeah.

You're going to assassinate people with a knuckle duster. Well, I mean, I could do it. Come on. That's just your fist, but heavier. That's not so much a weapon is just admitting the other guy punches harder than you in advance, isn't it? I guess so. Okay. So I say again, do you have any skills relevant to assassination? I, I eat a lot of sandwiches. I don't see how that's relevant.

Well, not yet, obviously. Okay, okay. How are you jumping into cards full of hay from up on high? What? Or suddenly blending into a crowd, even though the people are chasing you and you're still wearing the same thing, you just start walking.

I'm not really sure. If you ever jumped from one roof to another, I'm from rural Bosnia. We don't have roofs or hey yet. Yeah. No, I guess you wouldn't look. We get a lot of applicants and I'm not seeing anything that screams higher over here on your resume. What else can you tell me? I'm young, hopeless and willing to die for a cause I can't remotely understand. You're hired. Same reason to work at Staples. Stand behind desk pretend I can't see you. stand behind this pretend I can't see you. I'm a painstaker.

Because Spanish lady is sending facts about the medicine. And we're back to learn more about the assassination of Archduke Franz Ferdinand. When we paused for a break, a Gavrilo principle had learned the secret black handshake, oh, jealous. And they picked the grassy knoll for the assassination. And now I believe it's time for us to kill some Austro-Hungarian nobility. That's right Cecil. It is. Oh good. So on the morning of June 28th, 1914, the Archduke got into a motorcade that was supposed to have six vehicles, but they somehow forgot three of them when all

the cops loaded into one. So, this actually happened. So, with this half the cars, how can I just hide it in the behind? How do we do that? How do we not notice like, they're going literally, they're going to get a fucking car. Wait, are we clowns or cops? Oh, fuck, I'm sorry. I just saw the scene. I Larry, get off my lap.

Larry, the scene says is we have six cars! I never get to sit with Shmirna. I love Shmirna. Oh, God. Yup, yup, really happened. So like half the cars are just idling behind them. They'll get to one. And they head off with Fernand for a well publicized drive

down a main road full of people who mostly wished somebody would kill him. The John F Kennedy story. So basically whenever Trump goes to a state, they can spell its name. Like that. And at this point, it's worth mentioning that the local military commander, general Michele von Appel suggested that to do this trip safely, they need to position troops along the route of the motorcade. But for fear of offending the local populace, they scrapped those plans. And in retrospect, considering that assassins were positioned along the way at intervals of power ups on a Mario Kart track, it probably should have just offended the locals.

I got to say, I sort of feel like if you're worried about being assassinated by the locals, the locals are already offended. I mean, that's just, that's just fucking sale, right? But I just wish that they would have told from turtle shells that the guy until he died that would have been amazing He almost makes it and then blue shell so man Throwed down his heart no, it's fucking bullshit. It's bullshit. You know it World War one would have been a radically different conflict, yo. Just imagine the French troops that have for done bouncing off bullet bills to make it

to von Falkenheim's flying pirate ship. There's not even a much more awesome war. I try to jump on there and the fucking the drawbitch burns behind it. All right. So the motorcade passed by the first two assassins who failed to act. They didn't do anything. They would both later say that there were too many innocent people nearby and that they didn't want to cheat on their really hot revolutionary girlfriend from Canada. You wouldn't know or be able to check on her. But I feel like it's safe to say they worst out. They worst out. That's what happened. They did have one. She lives in Niagara Falls

area. She totally wears like a Shea Gavaris T-shirt. They totally did it. She never shaves down there. It's terrible. Like Cecil doing a handstand. New York guys in New York. She's real and she's a pole dancer and she's totally real. All right. So this is where the third would be assessed and jumped out as the Archduke's car pass by and he threw a bomb at it. So also a lot like Mario Kart, but as it turns out, the third session has an arm like a fucking little league right fielder who's dad made him play. So that was me. It really was. So it does not work out. He misses by an entire car and the bomb. It's a way of the dates under the car. Next in line. Wow. Thanks Tim T. Bull. He didn't say that's never happened to me before. I bet he regretted it forever. No, we're actually getting to my favorite part. So the failed assassin, Nadelle, Nj, Nell, by the fucking bell.

What the fuck is happening? There's an LJ and I came next to each other. They should have killed him. No, go in pre-Soviet Russia worth consonant you. Admittedly, that name would kill it in Scrabble. Yeah, right. Quijibo. All right, so that guy swallowed a cyanide pill and jumped into the nearby

But then he accidentally vomited the cyanide pill back up Hot dry summer left the river all of 13 centimeters centimeters so this guy is so splash around like that in tight I just spit on my side I just spit on my side I just spit on my side I just spit on my side I just spit on my side I just spit on my side I just spit on my side I just spit on my side I just spit on my side I just spit on my side I just spit on my side I just spit on my side I just spit on my side I just spit on my side I just spit on my side I just spit on my side I just spit on my side I just spit on my side I just spit on my side I just spit on my side I just spit on my side I just spit on my side I just spit on my side I just spit on my side I just spit on my side I just spit on my side

I just spit on my side I just spit on my side I just spit on my side I just spit on my side I just spit on my side I just spit on my side I just spit on my side I just spit on my side I just spit on my side I just spit on my side Nobody's even tried to Nobody's even tried to arrest them to just watching them Nobody's even tried to Nobody's even tried to

arrest them to just watching them They're just They're just They're just They're just They're just They're just They're just They're just They're just They're just They're just They're just They're just They're just They're just They're just They're just They're just you around him, flailing around in a puddle. Are you done yet? He's like, I'm gonna time out. I just imagine this dude sitting in the garage in his Chevy bolt for a couple hours, trying to slit his wrist with a safety razor. He's not working, guys. The Arctuke, no doubt realizing how embarrassing it would have been to get assassinated by this

fucking group of idiots. He, uh, he worries on the speech he was supposed to give, which was tough since his notes were now all covered in blood. Um, after that, he decided to go to the local hospital to visit the people injured during that bombing. Yeah, he still shows up and gives a speech. I call and sick if somebody else gets a cold. That is a work ethic right there.

Hey, two years earlier, Teddy Roosevelt got shot and did a 90 minute speech with a bullet in his ass. Austro Hungarians are pussy. They got nothing on us. They literally have nothing. They got nothing on us. They literally have nothing. They're not even a country. So yeah. All right. So meanwhile, Gavrilo Princeip learned of the unsuccessful assassination attempt and decided to head crying to a pastrami on rye about it. That actually sounds pretty good right now.

Oh, just drama. Sorry. Sorry. Okay. It turned out the deli was pretty much exactly on the route between the archduke's speech and the hospital just by chance. And even an even bigger coincidence, the archduke's car happened to stall out pretty much directly in front of the deli. Jesus Christ, at this point is Doc Brown panhandling for 1.21 jiggle wads outside. Yeah, the guy at the shop's like, Hey, Mr. I ain't got no change for a fight, but he got this bullet with one gun. I am not a super lazy time traveler. This guy's fucking car stalls out. not a super lazy time traveler.

This guy's fucking car stalls out. Nobody bothers to check the fucking mechanical integrity of the car that they're going to drive down murder all your way over the fuck they're driving around it. Okay, guys, maybe we should check this one out before we hop in or huh? I mean, I'm no nationally reviled, Ardstuk, but if my car stalled out in Sarajevo today, I'd be calling an air support Jesus, it's like, oh fucking Tesla. God damn it See all this happened and realizing it wasn't too late to get all that you know Marjorie pussy

Prinsip pulled out of gun and shot both the arch two can his wife from about five feet away. He fired two shots, one hitting Ferdinand in the jugular vein, and the other hitting Ferdinand's wife in the abdomen. Both victims died minutes later as the car drove off. Oh, okay. So this is the director's cut of selfie's choice. Okay. I believe friends said to his wife, stay alive for the children. You're gonna have to pick between them and act three. All right. Well, uh, Pertzip was arrested immediately. And in later testimony, he insisted

the second shot was intended for the regional governor, who was also in the car with like 25 little people. But despite being. Major, sorry. We called me. Yeah. But despite being real sorry about hitting the lady, he was sentenced to 20 years in prison. 20 years. Yeah.

And so if you're keeping track at home, murdering foreign dignitaries is to Sarajevo as selling 40 bucks worth of crack is to bolt. Yeah. 16 other defendants were sentenced in the assassination. Five of them were sentenced to death. And in the end, the guy who actually pulled the trigger was given a sentence that was tied for a seventh worst. No, it's because he was standing his ground, right?

I get it. Everyone was smudgy back then. How many shots does it take to get to the center of an art stuc? Two, it's two. I can beat that in one. This event is often cited as the event that sparked World War one. And even though that's a bit like trying the butterfly that caused the tsunami, there's no doubt that this did touch off a series of events that directly led to the first world war. And by extension, the deaths of like 17 million people, give or take. Yeah, but, but to be fair, they'd all be dead

by now anyway. Total non-offent. Okay, so one last thing, there's a silver lining the story, I guess. Thank you. So few shows talk about the light side of World War One. Right? Must have gas. I brought headdams. Superlating. One more time. The, the purpose of the assassination was to break off Austria-Hungary's Southern provinces to create a combined state of Yugoslavia. And although it took a world war, they eventually did achieve their goal and all the Yugoslavians peacefully ever had. That's over 91 or whatever. 17 million people died, so we can have the automotive miracle

that was the UGO. Worth it, guys. Once every one of them. So if you had to summarize Heath, what you learned, what would you say? Um, uh, first of all, always shoot him now. Never wait till you get home. Classic classic trick. Folks, money's gonna get you.

Um, also always bring a pocket sandwich. That's just kind of. All right. Well, since you read most of a mostly source article on the subject, I think it would be safe to say you're now an expert. So now it's time to throw it to the panel to see if one of our experts can stump you with an assassination of art, Duke, friend, Ferdinand related question. Are you ready? I'm yes. It's okay. We're all ready. Everybody's ready. Except you except for you. Yeah. Yeah. Do you need a do you need a no? I'm good. Keep going

It's time to get right now. All right. I'll start us off. All right. So as the nephew of Emperor France, Joseph, France, for none was not the first in line for the throne at birth. That honor belonged to crown prince Rudolph. Why did Fernand move ahead of him in the line of succession? Was it a that no one would let him play any Austro-Hungarian games? Be Fernand had some really delicious looking soup and Rudolph was hungry. See, that one was biblical. See, Rudolph committed suicide after news of an extramarital affair went public, he root off committed suicide after news of an extramarital affair went public. Or D, the Austro Hungarians didn't want to be ruled by a guy that looked like Anthony Jessen and Lix mom dressed them up for sailor pictures.

Oh, I'm so. Uh, killing the Jezneck looking mom, the guy thing. Yeah. D. Why not? Yeah. We'll say it was D because this relies on you having it right. All right. I got a question for you. What were the arch dukes? Final words. A, I'm dying. B, Sophie stay alive for the children. C, no fuck you, Alan. Or D none of the above because he spoke fernese or Austrian I'm not sure Final answer Um, I think it's I think it's actually D because I think you said pastrami on rye want to split it I think it's actually D because I think you said pastrami on rye want to split it. That is also correct.

Yes. What was Archduke Ferdinand named in his high school yearbook? A. Fertilicious. B. Most likely to be assassinated. C. The hardest working Archduke in show business. Or D. Most likely to be responsible for Dan Carlin taking over a goddamn year to teach us something. Uh, this is what I got in the high school year back to. I'm going with B most likely to be

by your time he's that's gonna happen. No, it's I'm sorry. It's the Dan Carlin answer. It's a Dan Carlin. All right. Okay, before we move on, I do have one more question for Heath. Archduke Ferdinand was so beloved that after his death, he will be forever known for this symbol. A, a green sash chosen because his lovely wife Sophie, it was his lovely wife, Sophie's

favorite color. And luckily, she didn't have to live through World War II and decide which one of her kids had to die. I don't know. B, the gold march dukes. See, a coat of arms that looks like a checkered board where the red line is about to scratch the fuck out of a gold castle. Or D, his weird cylindrical hat that looks like someone just on the whole of the fly. Definitely, definitely be the golden archducks. It's a red lion getting ready to scratch the fuck out of a castle.

We had recorded this episode before we finalized the website and the Twitter and the Patreon and all that. So the guys trusted me to close out the show on my own. Now, an unethical person might use this opportunity to make their co-hosts say some really embarrassing things, right, Eli? Big of fucking! But people who know me know that I'm not that type of person to do something like that. I am, however, the type of person to let people know I could do this.

So let me get on with closing the show. We're gonna have a new show next week and we also launch that same week. So we encourage everyone who likes the show to share it and rate it on iTunes when it launches. We wanna thank our Patron supporters, of course, this week for their generous support of our work. We really to thank our Patron supporters, of course, this week for their generous support of our work. We really do appreciate the donations and it makes this show possible. If you'd like

to join their ranks and sign up on Patreon for a per episode donation, you can go to patreon.com slash citation pod. That's one word. Our website, I'll also launch next week, which will have the show notes for this and all the other episodes, as well as links to our podcasts and links to connect with us on social media and that sort of thing. So check it out when it launches. It'll be citationpod.com. So for Tom, Heath, Noah and Eli, I'm Cecil, saying goodbye for this week and we'll be

back next Wednesday. For the next episode of Citation Needed, and hopefully by then, Eli can control his sexual Tom was the first though to stomp our expert this week, so he'll be taking over the hosting duties next week. And he gets to decide who has to read next week's article. Well, since this subject was full of clumsy man children struggling with basic tasks, I'm going to go with Eli Bosnian. Yeah. Yeah.

If he lasts that long, okay. So of course, it also included in your victory gift bag is getting to read the answer to last week's question. The question was from Eli, Why am I so cold? Someone hold me. I'm slipping into the abyss. And the answer is, Eli, it will all be over soon. Okay. All right. Well, for top of Eli, Keith and Noah. He likes me too. He likes me too. He likes me too.

He likes me too. He likes me too. He's the only one who's not with us. He's the only one who's not with us. He's the only one who's not with us. He's the only one who's not with us.