Citation Needed - The Spanish Flu

Episode Date: April 15, 2020

The Spanish flu, also known as the 1918 flu pandemic, was an unusually deadly influenza pandemic. Lasting from January 1918 to December 1920, it infected 500 million people – about a quarter of the world's population at the time. The death toll is estimated to have been anywhere from 17 million to 50 million, and possibly as high as 100 million, making it one of the deadliest pandemics in human history.[2]

I'm telling you, it's great! It is not great! Oh, hey guys, Cecil, Tom, will you guys talk to him? I'm also here. I heath, I- Uh, talk to him about what? I know. Nothing, it's nothing, no it's just jealous.

Jealous of what? Uh, me getting Broadway all to myself. That's super dumb. Thank you. Why not? Everyone else is staying inside, so it's fine. It's just me and coffee Steve. Coffee Steve, like he enjoys a caffeinated beverage on occasion. No.

Burn him. Yeah, let's burn him. Let's just burn him. Let's just burn him. I'm just gonna bite him on fire. A grade. 100%. Guys, just to be clear, I am running out of clones. Yeah does not dissuade me literally in this economy

Hello and welcome. The citation needed. The podcast where we choose a subject, read a single article about it on Wikipedia and we're 10-Ware experts. Because this is the internet, and that's how it works now. I'm Eli, and I'll be desperately hoping that this episode is never described as really ironic and retrospect But only to people to share the responsibility Yeah, wish I hadn't written

First up two guys who were social distancing before it was cool. No, what end he yeah, you know like whenever people start talking about limiting your social context I remember to check their fucking privilege about limiting your social context, I remember to check their fucking privilege. Okay. And by the way, social distancing has a warmer sound on vinyl. Most people can't appreciate the difference. I can. I can.

And also joining us tonight, two men who swear they owned that much toilet paper anyway. Cecil and Tom, look, as this shows that it, I clean up after four assholes every week so fuck me. And I'm just saying a clean ass hole is a happy asshole. These are words to live by. Now before we begin today going whatever moment to thank our patrons.

They don't let me get one bidet Costco. I wanted to get a whole card full Wanted to get a whole bunch top's just got a card of 19 Fuck you guys poor people use toilet paper They're not technically limited sir. Go ahead. This is weird Sir, that's just a sprinkler from the garden section. You got a squeeze knot. Okay, so, so, I'm telling you how to use what I want to use.

Now, before we begin tonight, I could take it. I could take it. P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P You're buying an Audi Turbo along with these, what's happening? Sorry, I'm before we begin tonight. I'd like to take a moment to thank our patrons. Patrons, without you, I wouldn't get to call all the fortnight. I've been playing, working from home. So, if you'd like to learn how to join their ranks and there's never been a better time, be sure to stick around to the end of the show.

And with that out of the way, tell us Noah, what person place thing, concept, phenomenon, or event? We'll be talking about today Well, you know a lot of people scared and in their homes. We thought we'd do something lighthearted this week But Tom vetoed that so We're gonna talk about the Spanish flu or as Trump likes to call it the Chinese Spanish flu Tom you thought to yourself you know, what's a great subject for jokes right now? And I'm like, are you ready to use the other episode?

We recorded tonight. Honestly, honestly, to be fair, this seemed like a less horrifyingly inappropriate idea last week when I thought about last week, it was a hoax. We record this in when it's you say, see yeah depending on how far in advance we're recording this episode it's going to get more and more inappropriate it's fun like that so to quote my wife's wedding vows were here now and people are listening so he might as well what was the Spanish flu? Okay, I again I know this seems like something of a macabre topic.

That's because it is. And I know this is gonna like release sometime in mid-April when almost none of the current analogs to our world will seem even mildly appropriate for humor. Nonetheless, the Spanish flu pandemic. I don't have any counter points. I just have the rest of this episode. I just wanted to announce that that was said.

And keep going. I'm just gonna go. Yes. All right, the spirit's flipping up in the back of 1918 and 1919. It was one of those actually kind of weird, rare events that was just massively important and global in scope and yet somehow rarely discussed or taught. And while maybe this is a little too much too soon

for a lot of people to be comfortable, it seems like if we don't learn the lessons we can about this now, we're missing some pretty big opportunities to be much less dead. Yeah, no, this is a great time for a teachable moment. Yeah. Yeah.

We're great at this. America's not great at learning from mistakes. We're that kid who looks at the stove and thinks it couldn't possibly be hot 45 touches in a row. If enough of your skin sticks to it, then it's not. Exactly. You're adequately insulating. So the Spanish flu pandemic was set amidst the backdrop of the end of the first world war. So soldiers from all over the globe, it's spent months, sometimes years packed in a filthy trenches, confined to tight quarters, malnourished and under just intense stress with no opportunity

to practice social distancing, much less even reasonably acceptable social hygiene. There was, however, strangely, a reasonable amount of toilet paper. Huh. Oh, so 247 rolls. A person. Okay. That's a lot. See you. Even though none of these people ever really ate enough, the soldiers still had to eat something. So often in the trenches, they were right among the rank and file soldiers. They were frequently pigries. Oh,

word which I just learned and I love like almost no other word. Oh, I'm gonna make your day time that can also be used to describe swineish behavior. I didn't make my day. The higories at the local supermarket these days. Oh, I love it. Yeah. My whole life just got better because I learned that there was also just tons of poultry everywhere like live poultry. That's healthy.

So basically like imagine a timeline where that kid from the Twilight Zone who has ultimate power, he's a flu virus. It's that. It's fucking flu topia. It really was. You know, the Piggory thing, it makes for a boring nurse or I'm if every piggy just goes to the front lines. It's super boring.

And this is a biggie got caught. All right, so a new disease began to spread. The name Spanish flu, that's actually something of a misnomer. A number of sources I looked at couldn't agree on where the virus originated, but all of them agreed that it was not Spain. The flu was actually called the Spanish flu because Spain was neutral during World War One. And because of this, Spain had one of the few national press systems that wasn't completely controlled by government censors, jealous of trying to reshape the national narrative.

So it wasn't actually that the flu came from Spain. It was just that Spain was the only country that wasn't lying about the flu. Well, that's yet another reason why COVID-19 should not be called the Chinese virus. Good point. You know, with the nationalist tendency to name flu's after nationalities, we don't like I for one. I'm just grateful we've never had a Jew flu. I mean, it runs. Yeah, that's actually Eli. If you will get to that history eventually. But you flew. Damn. Hebola. Hebola. Oh my God.

Oh my God. That's... Somebody said, go ahead. But since people are fucking stupid and they're gullible and they really need easy villains, this didn't prevent anybody from blaming Spain for the flu. In fact, the British press seized on the idea of the Spanish flu so hard that they blamed the flu on the weather in Spain saying, and this is a quote,

the dry, windy, Spanish spring is an unpleasant and unhealthy season. And then they had the gall to suggest that the wet climate of Britain might be better. This actually marks the only time in all of human history where Britons were able to pretend the weather wasn't the worst in the entire fucking world. Okay, but wouldn't that flu only survive in Spain then? And mostly not in the planes. Just a COVID-19 allergic to gumption and gun control. What fine? Just a bunch of brits standing in the fog and drizzle. Ah, you feel that pinking scooting for the soul.

You're not even wrong. So as troops from around the world, disperse from the battlefield back to their home countries, they brought back with them this new form of influenza. This not only allowed the virus to spread more rapidly across more of the globe than had ever before been possible, but this also happened at exactly the wrong point in medical history. Cool. Cool.

We haven't hit the right point yet, but as soon as we know, we'll let you know. Look, we even had a pandemic test run last year that we totally failed, but we didn't do anything to fix it because we were all taken selfies with the Dow Jones. So we climbed to the top and slide down. Yeah, it's more like it's more like that ride at like the amusement parks that doesn't have a slope. It's literally just a straight down drop that they just drop you from. It's one of those routes. It doesn't even know what this means.

This is a, I don't even know. It's crazy. So medical science had at this point just about an hour ago or so, figured out that bacteria was a thing and it caused a hell of a lot of problems. And they figured out that topical antibiotics helped to fix a lot of those problems.

So they discovered those and they began their very effective use during World War I in the form of sulfates. Viruses, however, are way fucking smaller than bacteria. It's like with a very good light microscope, you can see bacteria, those are visible. And although known to medicine already, viruses are much, much fucking smaller than bacteria. And so just inherently more difficult to study and understand.

Viruses are actually so small that they're only visible with an electron microscope, which is a tool which wouldn't even be invented until 1931. And in case you're wondering, virologists out there, no, I am not going to bring up the Pandora viruses. What am I some kind of pedantic, pretentious douche? Can I? Yeah, those ones only eat bamboo anyways. Ha ha ha ha ha ha.

There's like a handful of them in a zoo, but they won't even fuck each other. It's a pain in the hands to keep them around. Jesus. They're always social distancing, yeah. So medical science, having just figured out how to successfully treat some infections caused by bacteria, they were entirely unprepared to successfully treat some infections caused by bacteria, they were entirely unprepared to even think about dealing with viruses in any meaningful way.

Yeah, not like today where we have water, soap, and hiding from it like it's the monster from birdpox. It's got all this, it's got all this great stuff. So the world now had a virus which had developed and spread among a diverse and immune-weekened population that then carried that virus, often aboard overcrowded trains and transport ships across the globe to an unsuspecting populace. Well, this certainly contributes to the rapid globalization of the Spanish flu.

Another theory attributes it spread to the transport and abuse of Chinese labor. Okay, it's spread on American railroads got it. Not that far off in 1917 and 18 nearly 90,000 Chinese laborers were mobilized to the Western front. These laborers were sent in sealed transport containers for six days before arriving in France, they were tasked with digging the trenches, unloading trains, laying new tracks, repairing damage tracks, a lot of train stuff. The illnesses of the Chinese, the containers, they were sealed the seal like a window. You know, it's hard to say if they said sealed, sealed is the word that

they used in the articles I read. So the illness that Chinese labors were attributed to, and I love this, Chinese laziness, and that's all cat, that's like a pronoun, like Chinese laziness by the doctors, and their complaints were not taken seriously, and many of the transported workers were seriously ill, and many others just died before they ever made it to France.

Jesus, you're shitting so forcefully that the NASA ground launch sequencer engineer is giving you T minus 10 seconds. And your boss thinks it's because you're lazy. Look, no, fuck. Jesus, at least at Amazon, they do that regardless of ethnicity, right? That was fucking worse.

But you have to do it in a bottle there. You have to do it in between. So still the term Spanish flu stock, probably because the flu quickly struck El Fonz on the 13th. He was the king of Spain. He became very ill and nearly perished from it. Soon many Spanish politicians were taken ill and an estimated 40% of those who worked in close confines would come down with the illness. This caused widespread disruptions in Spain. The tram systems in Madrid ceased to function properly. Communication systems were in shambles,

and medical staff was soon very overwhelmed. Cool, cool and fun, fun and cool fun, cool fun, cool cool fun fun, apropos, nothing. Oh, everyone. As you know, the so-called Spanish flu has swept the nation, and it is the job of this class of force here to, I think one of the Spanish flu is not a great idea. We have no indication it started there and it might lead people to the false belief that only those who have been to Spain are vulnerable.

Oh. You know, I see that's actually a good point. Any other suggestions out there, anybody? Anyone? What about the Octavirun flu? Ooh, oh, I like that. We don't even have a voter for this. Because we can just give it a disease name, right?

You can't name it after a race or something that's dangerous and stupid. Yeah, yeah, stupid. Yeah. Super. What about the Anderson flu? Okay, super mature, guys. Anderson. Well, it's decided. This task force shall eliminate the Anderson flu. Oh, okay. Sure. Sure, guys. Anderson. Well, it's decided this task force shall eliminate the Anderson flu once and for all.

It's a great name. Nice. Can you not sit so close to me? Seriously, I don't want to get the Anderson flu. Me? Don't scooch. I hate your gross. You're gross, yes. If you're funny.

And we're back. When we left off, Tom was assuring us that his fiddle playing would take everyone's mind off the fire. So what happened next, Tom? Well, okay. Again, this seemed like a better idea before that first horseman. The virus wasn't contained by lack of political transparency. While Spain seemed hardest hit at first, that was only because, again, they just weren't

lying about it. Very soon returning soldiers had spread the virus across the world, began a Buddha pastor of struck, Germany, France, then Britain began to be affected. By September of 1918, the virus was effectively a global pandemic reaching as far as the United States, Sweden and South Africa, in addition to much of Europe. I'm sorry, did I miss a swig? The virus itself was an influenza virus. We meant to cause problems primarily in the respiratory areas of the body. The virus wasn't like the normal seasonal flu, however. The Spanish

flu symptoms were so violent, it was often misdiagnosed as cholera or dengue fever. One observer wrote of the victims of Spanish flu, quote, one of the most striking of the complications was hemorrhage from mucus membranes, especially from the nose, stomach and intestine, bleeding from the ears and petricial hemorrhages in the skin also occurred. And then she got like even weirder like somebody was just spending random points playing plague ink, but just using real people. The New York City Health Department's chief pathologist said quote, cases with intense pain, look act like cases of dengue, hemorrhages from nose or bronchi eye, parisis and paralysis of either cerebral or spinal origin, impairment of motion may be severe or mild, permanent or temporary, physical and mental depression,

intense and protracted prostration led to hysteria, melancholiaolia and insanity was suicidal intent Although usually the cause of death was just pneumonia as it off Nomonias like the flu's tag team partner except like With your grandma instead of John Cena Yeah, sorry, I got a threat of theory here Severe or mild impairment of motion, intense and protracted prostration, hysteria, melancholia, insanity, suicidal, and guys, I'm pretty sure Eli is taking a fever.

That's very true. Oh, the prestige. So this fool was also really unusual and there was mostly fatal among a segment of the population that didn't often succumb to the flu. The Spanish flu killed mostly people who were otherwise healthy, striking down people in the prime of their lives, most deadly to people in their 20s and 30s. This was particularly terrifying as the world had just lost rather a lot of its young men

in World War One. And now hot on the heels of one tragedy was this insidious new menace. The prevailing theory was that this flu for the young and robust, sometimes triggered an overreaction of the immune system called the cytokine storm. Yeah, and that was way more fun

when it was reuse special move in Street Fighter II of the cytokine storm. Down with the left and low punch, down left low punch. She got to roll it. So I'm not going to pretend to understand everything that a cytokine storm entails. What essentially happens though is that the immune system senses the problem,

goes completely fucking ape shit crazy, and the immune response is so aggressive that inflammation gets wildly out of hand, and then the organs and tissues are just ruined from the massive overreaction. Get everything it wants. It's flu garrags disease. Basically, the flu caused young people's immune system to just like hand over their cellular beer, scream, yoloolo would jump off a cliff. Whole time you insist some scream and stop eating yourself.

Stop eating yourself. Yeah, right. This seems like the fucking immunological equivalent of vote in third party to burn it all down. So, definitely more prevalent among people in their 20s and 30s, I get that though. I see what I'm saying. Man, a lot of countries with accelerationism on this one, it's gonna go good.

It's gonna go good. Yeah, right. So the advice that people got might sound pretty familiar from a hundred years ago. Doctors had no idea to treat the flu, so they just tried really hard to reduce its spread. Patients were ordered to be sequestered from others. People were encouraged to avoid large groups,

and this may sound familiar as well. Some people did a much better job at others in heating this fucking advice. In September of 1918, the health commissioner in Philadelphia warned the city that if they were not careful, a lot of people were going to be very sick. Instead of listening the very next day, 200,000 people gathered together for the largest parade in the city's history in support of the sale of Liberty Bonds. Within three days, every bed and all 31 hospitals in the city were completely filled. Thousands had fallen ill. And within a week, 45,000 people were sick. Yeah. but at least everybody else didn't have to watch the paraders on fucking Facebook.

Like idiots. Put me yellow hashtags on the fucking beach. Ah. Ah. Yes. All right, where there's sick people, there are also bullshit cures and those who seek to profit from the desperation caused by fear and misery. So people were told to eat some cinnamon.

What? Delicious. If somewhat ineffective cure for the flu. Others were told to drink more wine. Okay. Um, still others were admonished to consume a specific beef broth called, and I fucking love this. Oxo's meat drink.

Oh, God, there's two words that never belong right next to each other. And there's also a company called Formaments. And they just told everybody that everyone should suck on four or five of their vitamin lozenges every day to avoid quote, infective processes. Just a Russian guy in a fake mustache wandering around telling people not to take high-profile. He bumps into a middle-aged gym baker selling cupfuls, a colloidal silver to people. So of course all those fucking cures are bullshit and soon things began to crumble.

Businesses were shuttered. Schools closed as did theaters. People advised to stop shaking hands and to stay indoors. The city of New York even made spitting on the streets illegal, though I guess it's still perfectly legal to just piss anywhere you like and then dump your garbage on the frontstool. For sure.

The cops did like spitting stang operations, hiding for long hours and the garbage forts on the sidewalk there, you know? Okay, all right, Cecil, those are ramparts for when the homeless attacks are dead. Yes, thank you. The healthcare system was soon completely overwhelmed. Doctors and nurses fell ill at alarming rates

and soon medical students had a pitch in to help. It's like, just imagine how little actual doctor is new in 1918, right? And probably in better shape before you learn that stuff, you know, just like random person. And like, now the guy helping you knows less than that guy. Like he's still in school. It's essentially healthcare provided by a series of animated Mickey Mouse

blooms wearing lab codes covered in blood. Yeah. And he got him stuck on a Disney cruise to see that. Yeah, the boat is the Diane King. Yeah. Diane Davis. Nice. So the body is then began to pile Yeah. Diane Dammace. Nice. So the body's then began to pile up.

And well, that's usually a metaphor. Here, this is very much not a metaphor. This is a thing that happened. The rate of fatality was nothing short of astonishing and there was simply no system in place to deal with the dead. Nurses visiting homes found patients sick with the flu, lying in bed next to family members

that had already succumbed. The mortuaries were so backed up with bodies, they resorted to just stacking the coffins outside. What a call from a guy named John Delaney recounts how he and his friends gleefully played on stacked up street coffins because that was a thing as kids pretending that they were climbing up the pyramids. Well, it's okay. The good news though is that if we have coffin pyramids on the streets by the time this

episode airs, these who can just edit out this paragraph, guys, you can use. We're living in the citation needed episode, yo. We're living in like three citation needed episodes now at the same time and that's terrifying. So many people were sick or dead. Relatives often had to bury their own loved ones. In New Jersey, prisoners were set to work digging graves, and Baltimore soldiers from nearby form mead were conscripted as grave diggers. Cascots themselves were also in short supply, since World War I had just ended and well,

fuck it's now this shit. So it got so crazy that the health commissioner from DC hijacked a train to steal the coffins being transported on it. They had those coffins redirected under his own personal armed guard to DC. In other places, bodies would be transported to the gravesite, then the body just dumped into the grave and then the coffin refilled like it was an empty cup at a soda fountain. Oh That's the worst because you know the lady at the morgue is glaring at you the whole time and you're like what you said unlimited Reveals this is You can't even get a mongstra to bring my

Environmental theater there's that one weird guy who mixes all the bodies to the morgan who is one coffin. He just keeps mixing up. It's not fucking weird. Okay. Okay. Okay. Now they make a whole bending, but she's because people like to do that. She's so normal. Call Dr. Pepper and it's delicious.

It's delicious. Love it. It's by the spring of 1919, the pandemic began to fade, but not before it had caused an unbelievable amount of carnage. Keep in mind that 1919 was a long time ago and we didn't have any nice things yet. So a lot of the numbers here are estimates, but conservative estimates put the number of infected at around 500 million worldwide. To put that into perspective,

the world's population was around 1.7 billion. So we're talking about a third world's population infected in just a breathtaking, sure, period of time, right? The depth toll for the span, hilarious. The depth toll for the Spanish flu ranges. Low end estimates that almost no one believes are around 17 million. That's on the low end. That's around 1% of the world's population though. So I keep running it in numbers that suggest 50 million

or more would not actually be a stretch for this thing. So the impact of this death poll was so immense that life expectancy in the US in 1918 dropped 12 years. Jesus. Yeah. The government had to go around killing old people the next year just to keep the numbers consistent. What?

Wait, what? It's not 100%. No, it would work. That's not. No, it's not. No, just go. No, I'm don't. Yeah, just keep going.

I move on. Ultimately, the Spanish flu receded in severity and lethality, not because we treated it or because we created a vaccine. We actually didn't do either of those things. Instead, what happened is it infected a large enough number of people that the population developed a certain amount of acquired immunity, which limited the disease as spread and the damage that it caused.

The psychological impact of the flu pandemic was so severe that for many years, relatively little scholarly material was available on the historicity of this incredible event. Several articles that I read suggested that the trauma of this flu so hot on the heels of World War I was simply too much to bear and that many people simply chose to ignore the incredible event as a means of coping. And while I'm not judging those that live through this catastrophe, I am suggesting that perhaps there are lessons here we might want to remain vigilant not to forget. No, no, but to be fair, they did a lot of histories of World War I and shit and didn't

learn a fucking thing from that. So I don't know if it matter. Totally. All right, Tom, yeah, summarize what you learned in one sentence. What would it be that we have never learned anything and we're not gonna start now? You can't make me. And are you ready for the quiz?

I'm dying to, we're all dying to, this seemed funnier the few weeks ago. Sure, I thought it was. Sure did. Sure. Let's do some more play about it. Perfect. All right. Tom, what's the best poetry to read during a quarantine. Is it a TB Cummings, B Edgar Allan polio, C Langston Flues or D, Ovid 19. It's very good. But I'm going to go with TB Cummings because the sentence is shorter. It was actually, first instinct, it was Ovid 19. Damn it. All right.

Okay. I've got one for you here. Eli's mom is reading lots of Ovid 19. Facebook Live. All right. I got one for you, Tom. How the fuck am I supposed to compete with a bit that contained both Edgar Allan Polio and the Publius Ovidius Nossal reference. Hey, saying over his whole name out. So it sounded like I was smart enough to get that

choke. Okay. Um, be go meta and make a whole bit about how much better heathstroke was than mine. Uh, see Colin sick or D remind you guys of that one time that we did to Brazilian guy who grew up in Squalor and I made that I mean the Brazilian Squalor baby joke. That was good. That was good. It was good. It was good. All right. Well, it can't be D because remember when is the lowest form of conversation. So I'm gonna call in sick. I'm just gonna go ahead and call and sick. you. That is correct, it is.

It is call and sick. That's what, yep. All right, Tom, since we're naming diseases after people we don't like, what would be a better name for this Spanish flu? He'll have. Hey, the people who get to the front of the line but don't know what they want flu.

Be anyone who's ever unironically talked about boosting your immune system, Flu. Or see the zip liner, Flu. Okay, zip liner even like a thing is somebody I dent to find has a zip liner. Oh, they're out there. Okay. Okay. Clearly it's be anyone who's ever unironically talked about boosting your immune system. It's the goop. It's the good. That is correct.

Or that is. Yeah. Tom, we learned about the pyramids made of flu coffins or they are wezer plateau earlier. What are some of other names of pandemic themed ancient wonders? Pretty good. Hey, the nausea Sophia. The recommended dosage mahal or scene, Aachu Pichu. That's what I'm saying.

Okay. Aachu Pichu is worth the flu pandemic. Like I don't even care. Like, okay, 50 million people, but I get Aachu Pichu out of, I know. I know. I'm not sure. I have no idea who wins. No, you were, D was wrong. Oh, sorry, it was the Nazia Sophia totally was.

Yeah. And by the way, he was right early or two. It's crazy. Sure. So, he's the wins. Yes. Exactly. I guess.

Yay. Sure. That works. No, I'm not really the, no, actually, it just supposed to be, I should be no, no, it's supposed to win. Let's do it. I just, let's sit this, let's sit this. No way.

Right for me. You can do the assay next time. What is happening? No, no, no. All right. Well, for Tom, see you have a system. We have to stay with God, Dan. I'm just going to be confused.

Jesus Christ. No, and Heath, I'm Eli Bosnick, making you for hanging out with us today. We'll be back next week, and by then, Heath will be an expert on something else. Which we now and then, Cecil will run out of sorts to shine in his house. Heath will be making toilet scotch. Noah's life will be unchanged, I'll be dead, and Tom will write an essay about it. I didn't even like that. He's so going. You can make a perip so donation at patreon.com slash citation pod or leave us a five-star

review everywhere you can. And if you'd like to get in touch with us, check out past episodes, connect with us on social media, or check the show notes, be sure to check out citation pod dot com. And remember, stay the fuck home. Yeah. If you can't, if you can. If you like it's killed by John Bennett Ramsey, that's like the funniest thing ever. I got it. It's pretty good. Yeah. You can't. If you like it's killed by John Bennett Ramsey, that's like the funniest thing ever. I got it.

It's pretty good. Yeah. That's pretty fun. Ha ha ha. Excuse me. Can you not stand so close to my sonny as a weakhold? It's just a name. Yeah. Well, at least we didn't give everyone the flu. Hey, people are idiots. Exactly.

Stop it. Stop it. I didn't... I hate this planet. We didn't give everyone the flame. People are idiots. That's coaching. I didn't, I hate this planet.