Citation Needed - Urban Legends Part 2

Episode Date: November 3, 2021

An urban legend or contemporary legend is a genre of folklore comprising stories circulated as true, especially as having happened to a "friend of a friend" or family member, often with horrifying or humorous elements. These legends can be entertaining, but often concern mysterious peril or troubling events, such as disappearances and strange objects. They may also be confirmation of moral standards, or reflect prejudices, or be a way to make sense of societal anxieties. Our theme song was written and performed by Anna Bosnick. If you’d like to support the show on a per episode basis, you can find our Patreon page here.  Be sure to check our website for more details.  

I'm sure it's fine. No, Cecil, you don't understand, man. You can't just tell Eli he's allowed to do a spooktacular. He mentioned like twice last week. How bad could it be? Like four times, but it was more than twice, but that was last week. Like this time he's had time to plant. You guys don't know, trust me.

Oh, welcome to the spooktorian. You know what? That's on me. No, I should know better, you're absolutely right. I told you! Yeah? I have collected your deepest jerkest fears, and now that you have entered my Spookatorium, you may never leave! For Tom of her! It's not my name.

A refrigerator. A refrigerator? Seriously, let me guess, it's's empty because I like to eat so much ooooh no Tom it is a smart fridge oh you need to do to open it is download the app and log in with your Facebook nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo And Noah, this is for you. Look, Eli, whatever you think you've done, I'm not gonna be scared of it. Oh, I haven't done much. I just said this week's scathing episode to release at 701A. Oh, fucking bastard, I have to fix this. Yes, but you can't, because I've changed our Patreon password to password 12345. But that's so insecure!

Okay, Eli, let me have it. What did you do? Destroy like all the mics or kill my family? What'd you do? Oh no, see, so I would never do anything like that to you, but I guess since no and Tom are busy, this week's podcast will just be you and me. No!

No! Stoicetacular! Oh Okay, that's a little that's a little much it's a little much Oh, I got so much it's a little much Tation needed it's a focus where we it doesn't even work subject what what read a single a subject. How do we do? Ooh, a subject.

Boo a subject. Read a single article about it on which appedia. Which appedia. That's not bad. Which appedia. And pretend we're experts because this is the internet and that's how it

looks now. Okay, I'm Eli Bosnick and I'm done with this bit. I will be the host of this Sputacolor Stravaganza Topia. First up, two men who would refer to Victorian ghosts as kids these days. He's the only one who knows. Check out my antique ghost restoration channel

on Boutube. It's pretty awesome. That it's not even October anymore and you're accusing me of living in the past. Okay. I was not unclear. I was not clear about the schedule. And also joining us tonight, a man whose appetite is used to scare poorly behaved, chupacabra

children. Okay. I originally read that as charcuterie Children and I've decided not to correct it. Before we begin tonight, I want to remind you of the urban legend of the artists who didn't have to quit and get a day job. Because of your financial support, some of you can say you can still hear them at night for as little as a dollar over. Forward slash citation pod. And with that out of the way, tell us know what person plays thing concept phenomenon or event.

We'll be talking about today. We're going to be talking about still more urban legends. Ooh, and see so like every good Halloween, you needed a part two. Are you ready to season of the witch slapper audience? Okay, are you going to stop now? Are you done? I'm almost done. Okay audience? Okay, are you gonna stop now? Are you done? I'm almost done.

Okay, all right. I'll do it then, sure. So, see, so tell us more religions please. So, it turns out there's a lot of legends about holes into hell. And what better hellish place to start than stall Kansas? Oh, no, that's just like an exit ramp the hell right there. Stahl is a home to a cemetery. The cemetery has the town's namesake and is supposed to

be a hole into hell. The devil comes up to visit Kansas on Halloween and the spring equinox and people there believe there is this is one of the seven gates that lead to the underworld allegedly on a trip to Colorado in the 90s. The pope flew over Kansas, but evidently flew around stall to avoid it. The wiki notes that there's no evidence for this and says quote, most academics, historians and local residents are in agreement that the legend has no basis in historical fact and was created and spread by students. And quote, no shit, Wikipedia.

I love the word most there so much. Wikipedia. Susan, you want to get on that girl? Susan, a true story that devil shows up on Halloween and the spring aquanox only because even the devil can only stomach two days in case. Maxed out. The 100% factual Trinity Broadcasting Network put out a story in 1989 about a whole into hell.

They said that there was a team of scientists and engineers in Siberia that drilled down 14 and a half kilometers. The drill broke through a large cavern down there so they decided to send a heat-proof microphone down the whole... What then? That could withstand the heat of a hundred, pardon me, a thousand Celsius heat. Oh, yeah, right. That's a... By the way, that's the melting point of copper that's used in Mike's and that's

not to mention any solder or plastic. But anyway, they ran the mic down there and they heard the screams of all the people that have been Evelyn God sentenced to torture for eternity. I guess they, they played a clip for this on their station, but people figured out it was a clip from the movie Baron Blood. Yeah. This story also ran in the weekly world news. You know how true it is. Well, you know science. Every time they discover something new, the first question they ask is,

okay, so what is it sound like? I love the idea that if that were true, we could start selectively rescuing people from hell, right? Quick grab my hand I'm from the future turns out hell was like the 45 minute trip downward So come on we're getting you the hell out of here, but first, what did you get sent to hell for? I, tonight, the word of the church. Well, grab my hand, we're getting you out of here. What about you?

Um, I, you know, philosophically, punishment for eternity is always unfair. Even if it's really bad stuff. I don't listen to him. He got to the front of the line without knowing what he wanted to order. Oh, come on, tantalty. Okay, you belong here. You stay open. You can't see the side to you get up to the front there gone. It's

fine. Another devil place. This one is called the devil's tramping ground. It's a campground in Bear Creek, North Carolina. So, Baron's circle. When they're at the tramping ground, they have to eat spaghetti until their lips touch in the middle. There's a Baron's circle in the woods where nothing grows. In this spot, you can supposedly hear dogs yipping at night.

How scary. Things placed on the ring get moved. Nothing grows there. And supposedly anyone staying the night there experiences weird shit. All of those things are true of Eli's living room too. I'm sitting very true. The legend is that this is the area where the devil paces.

What? Seriously, they think he just walks in circles at night there. I guess the pine does for it. Yeah, no, yeah, that's his pacing spot. I guess this is a pine forest and there's a high salt content in the ground, which attracts yipping wildlife that lick the ground to get the salt that inhibits plant growth. So yeah, or or the devil has anxiety and sort of works through it at night. Yeah. Yeah, I'm talking about some weird stuff. I'm talking about one of those many holes. Yeah.

Yeah. But most academics agree with Cecil. Another famous cemetery legend is that of the devil's chair. Before there were benches built in cemeteries, they would carve ornate seats out of stone. These were called morning chairs. Some of these stone chairs are still accident. Well, the legend is that local students and other young people dare each other to sit in the chair and then something bad happens to them because they had the hubris to sit in the chair or something

good happens to them because they had the courage to sit in the chair. Sometimes bad and good. I know it does. It can be either or. I'm not sure. Sometimes this happens on a special night, so it won't work unless they sit in the chair on New Year's Eve or on Halloween. Some say a hand will come up and drag into the ground and guys in Italy, they have a similar legend, but if a girl sits on the chair, she'll be married in here. To an Italian guy. So that's pretty spooky.

Okay. racist. Thank you, racist. They're white. I'm allowed. I am a white now. I would never. They're white. I'm allowed. I am allowed. They're white now.

I would never say that about a trustance, never. While some of these are, you know, regional or niche, this one feels like something we've all heard. It's a story that's been in lots of forms, either told by a survivor or as a police bulletin. The gist is that there's been a rash of people getting robbed out of mall or in a city metro area. The robbers, clever little devils here, they wait until the person, almost always a woman, is standing at her car laden with packages, struggling to open the car door with the keys.

Then the burglar who's been under the car the whole time slices her ankle with a razor What now evidently a group of thieves knows how to cut someone to disable them Because the thief calmly climbs out from underneath the car takes the keys and anything else they want drives away Sometimes this is for a gang initiation in the bulletin other times it's for sexual assault This is for a gang initiation in the bulletin. Other times it's for sexual assault. Sometimes people under the car will make a noise while the car is moving, and the person will exit the car

and get their ankle slash. No idea how someone fits under a car, let alone does it while they're driving. So your guess is as good as mine. No, Timmy, there are no monsters under your bed. Now shut up while I look for the under the car for Razer Wheel to drive this. Just come out.

I'm sorry, is the under the car for razor, will the drapes just come out? I'm sorry. Is the under the car part of this bullshit because people imagine themselves to be hard to stand without a sneak attack? Is it right? I'm not stuck. Right. No, I just can't imagine you getting out

from under the car. No, swiftly, right? No. And cars are like, and cars like aren't, they're close to the ground man. Like drop your keys like half under a drop your keys a foot and a half under the car and then try to get those keys see what happens. Oh, you have to buy a new car.

You have to get a new car. Guys, just wait and under my fucking Toyota Prius for four and a half hours. I try on AirPods at the Apple store. I'm a slice his ankle so bad. He gets in here. Let me wait in the cold. You go out to your car after the pandemic and this fucking skeleton under there is your way so long. Go ahead.

He would come back. Another super popular one is the killer in the back seat. The story can go several ways, but one version is that a woman, it's always a woman, is being followed closely behind by a car or a truck, and the truck keeps flashing its high beams at her, or sometimes even ramming her car from behind. When the woman makes it home, she gets out of the car and realizes that an escape mental patient or a killer was laying in the backseat. And every time we tried to get up the stepper, the car behind her flashes its lights and scares the guy back down.

In other versions, the woman quickly pulls up to a gas station and the truck drives off. She goes in to get gas like she's getting gas she goes inside and the attendant tells her that someone is in the back seat. Okay, I've heard this one. Does it feel like the moral of this story is, let that be a lesson to you ladies, not all cars that follow you and slam into you mean you are? You know, you know.

Of why would the attendant tell it, like he would just assume she had to somebody with someone in the back seat. It doesn't even make any sense. Wait, is she just shout out random, obvious observations all the time? Also, like, why does the truck drive away when she pulls in? I know.

I know. I'm going to drive home. Just off my hands, it's all beer 30. That's what we're saying right now. No, it's what also too, like the fucking lights scare the guy back down. Like off my hands. It's all beer 30. That's what we're saying right now. No, it's what also too like the fucking lights scare the guy back down like there's a light. Right. Right. And you can kill somebody but only the dog. Only if it's a surprise. It's a, if she sees me first, that ruins all the thing. I can't do it when you look. There's a supernatural version of this story. The woman is driving and then someone jumps out of nowhere and starts pounding on the car and screaming nonsense.

The woman freaks out, quickly drives away. She comes up to a stop sign, the same person slams the car, starts screaming. She does this a bunch of times, driving quickly away each time, then she goes to the police, runs inside. They come out to the car and find the killer in the back seat. And the person who's banging on the car was the ghost of the victim of the killer. And it was banging on the car and screaming nonsense in an effort to like warn the person, which seems like a really bad way to warn someone. Yeah. And the poor killers in the back seat like, you'll be cool. You're ruining the

vibe. That's my ex. Right. Ghosts truck drivers try. Hey, there's a killer in your back. We have words for this already. Does the killer have the word killer like? I know. I know. I know. I know.

I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. a young girl stays at home as a teenager. This is the first time that the girls left alone,

and she and her, she just has her trusty dog as company. And I mean, what do teenagers do when they finally have the house to themselves? They watch the evening news. The top story of that night is that the killer escaped from someplace, probably a jail, but sometimes a mental hospital. When she goes to sleep, she's a little afraid, so she reaches down in the dark to pet the dog, and she's reassured by a lick on her hand. When she wakes up in the morning to go to the bathroom, she sees the dog dead, sometimes skinned, and sometimes some other mutilation and written unblood on the wall, quote, humans can lick too. Some variations, the girls' parents come over in the morning, and she tells them that the dog kept her company all night and they said the dogs been outside all night and then again humans

Okay, you know what I mean? Girl goes to bed Dreams of being licked by a human this seems less urban legend and more sex advice column Allie Okay, I know the story is supposed to be chilling but like if you actually picture the frantic murderer under the bed being like, man, in a lot less scary and more fun, yeah, admittedly. No, right. Like, of all the things the escaped killer under her bed could have done in that situation,

this is pretty close to the least scary. What's your friend code and animal crossing? What? And why would he just lickers? He just looking to branch out from murder? Like I just tried so new today. Yeah, right. Yeah.

Another girl at home, this time a babysitter, the babysitters put the kids to bed, watches the news of course, like all babysitters do. A killer escaped, yada, yada, yada. She gets a call. This is back when house is, I got explain this gets a call. This is back when houses, I got to explain this to kids. No, this is back when houses used to have phone lines that were specific to that house. We call the landline. I understand what that is. Yeah, I know. I utilize staring at me puzzled. Anyway, she gets a call and someone whispers to check on the children. She thinks it's a prank, but after several calls, with the same result,

she calls the police. They traced the line somehow. Again, this is back before there was a caller ID on every single phone call. So they trace the call and they find that the call is coming from inside the house. She waits for the police. I know. It doesn't make any sense. You couldn't do that. You couldn't do that. You couldn't do that. It didn't work. It's a night that after a second line. I don't know. It doesn't make any sense, because back then, you couldn't do that. You couldn't do that. You couldn't do that. It didn't work. I'd be out of party lines. It's a night. That after a second line, I don't know.

It doesn't even make any sense. She waited, I know this is like an such an old guy joke. So she waits for the police, and then the killer has already killed the kids and was waiting for her to come upstairs because he had a favorite killer room, I'm guessing, I'm not sure. Sometimes in the story, the kids are playing a prank and the girl and the police come up and the police

just yell at the kids, which is a great, I like that one, I'm sure. Other times everybody dies. And in some variations of this legend, it ends with a time passing to when the young girl was now a mother, out with her husband, she gets a call at a restaurant, to tell her, check on her children.

She gets home and the kids are doing math. Oh, that good Here's a killer with a okay, but is this an urban legend or the 1979 I like that it takes several calls right this first time is like don't check the children no Because you know the killer then had a moment that was like, Hey, I have a whole thing. I just please, I have to find the rules of phone. Just do this, motherfucker. Please go check, please. Last killer one. This is of the hook or the hook man. The story often starts out with people driving up to make out point and they start to make

out. The news says a killer is on the loose because nothing sets the mood better than traffic and weather together on the A skies. You know, that's how you set the mood. In any case, the news says the killer is pretty easy to spot. He's got a hook hand prosthetic. Now, at some point, the guy gets out of the car either because they need some road maintenance or he's got a pee. Some version, he comes back and the woman's already dead. I guess Finland with your carburetor is louder than screaming

three feet away. I don't know. In other versions, the guy leaves doesn't come back. She's a woman's terrified and doesn't leave. She keeps hearing a scraping sound in the car and when Don rolls around, she psyched herself up sort of enough to get out of the car, and she finds that the guy hanging upside down under a tree, and he's parked, and there's sort of the dead guy is sort of swinging back and forth with his nail scraping the car as he sort of swings in the breeze.

Also, kind of the heart's unrelated in that one. Just like, and by the way, he has a disability. Yeah. But Eli and other versions, they do pull the trigger on check-on hook. Oh, okay. The guy gets in the car, the girl and he drive away,

but they hear her rattling, and then they look out and see the hook attached to the door. Okay, so that's, yeah. All right, well, I don't know about you guys, but I need to go turn on all the lights in my house while yelling really loudly. I'm only going to look for a little something I like to call After a poem nothing

Hey Brad, it's Jennifer. Yeah, you can come over whenever you want. The kids are asleep and the hinder since won't be home for hours. We can have all the sex. And depending on what this movie's rated, I might even take my bra off for it. Wait, one second, I've got a call on the other line. Hello? Hello Jennifer.

Have you checked the children? Let me see. Yep, they're fine. Wait, I'm sorry, what? Yeah, no, I just looked at them on the baby monitor. They're fine. How? How? It's dark in here. I mean, there. I hear that it is dark in that room. Oh, yeah, the baby monitor has night vision. Holy shit, baby monitors have night vision now. Oh yeah, no, that's actually pretty standard. Some of them have heart monitors and stuff. The like, register the game, yeah. The future is now, huh?

Well, I feel like you want to check out them anyway. Okay, fine. Hey, you guys okay? Yeah, we're fine. Yeah, totally good. I'm sorry, what was that? I used Waki Taki on my Apple Watch to ask him if they were okay. Jesus, the kids have Apple Watches.

What is with people these days? Technically mine's a fit bit. You know what? Never mind. I never mind. I'm upstairs and I'm going to kill you. Please come upstairs so I can murder you. Uh, no. What if I tell you it It's a TikTok challenge.

I'm on my way! Heh. Call back to last week. And we're back. We left off, we were visiting the Devil's Pier One imports and cereal colors. We're about as good at getting away with their crimes as Donald Trump. What's our next season? All right.

Let's finish up with creepy hauntings of urban legends. And let's start with all these belong in the toilet. There you go. There are several of these from Asian countries and from Japan in particular. This one's the legend of Hanako-san, sometimes called Hanako of the toilet in Japanese. The legend has variations, somewhere the girl killed herself in the toilet, others where she was murdered by an abusive parent or a teacher in the restroom, and others where she was killed in the toilet during an air raid in World War II. People can summon the ghost of the girl by going to the girl's restroom on the third floor of a school knocking three times on a stall and asking if Hanako son is there.

The ghost then answers, yes, I'm here. And then the person may see a ghostly hand. Sometimes that hand comes out of the toilet and pulls the person in, presumably to hell, or, and this one really threw me, quote, the individual may be eaten by a three-headed lizard who claims that the individual was invading Hanako's privacy and quotes, okay. Question, would the lizard be interested

in some American bigots bothering trans people in the bathroom because we got a big dinner waiting for you. If you are, buddy, I'm just saying. God, what can them to spend an eternity on the toilet? Eli, are you a Japanese ghost? You have to tell us if you are. Another from Japan, this is the legend of Kuchisaki, Ona.

Translates to Slitmouth woman. This is an old one, more folklore than urban legend, where a spirit will wander around with a mask that partially covers her face. It's old as new, I guess. In any case, this partially mass spirit woman will wander up to some stranger. She's carrying a sharp instrument like scissors,

then she'll ask them, while she's masked, if she's pretty. The respondent says, yes, then she takes off her mask and she asks again. This time the person she's asking can see her face, and there's a mouth that's sort of a bloody slit that's extended from ear to ear, cut ear to ear. And if they say yes again, she cuts their face to resemble hers.

If they say no, at any point in the conversation, she just up and kills them. The spirit woman, sometimes the story is disfigured because she was punished by her husband for her infidelity or she sometimes died of a botched medical procedure. There are there are ways to get away from her. And these are great. For instance, if she asks you, you could just say, or average and while she's computing whether to kill you with her flow chart, you can run away. Another possible escape method is to throw hard candies at her guys.

You could throw hard candies at her. That one works. I know it too. Nowadays, she comes up to ask if she's pretty and some fucking dude, bro's like, pretty sharp news. Okay, but there is actually good news. There's kind of a post script. You don't have to be worried about this ghost anymore. Pretty sharp knees, you know, sharp knees. Okay, but there is actually good news,

this kind of a post-crip. You don't have to be worried about this ghost anymore. On our trip to Japan, she tried her thing on Heath, three hours into him defining terms. She cut herself in half. So that's actually a huge factor just by all the legends done now. Next up, again from Japan,

the legend of Teke Teke. This ghost is super pissed because in life, they fell on some train tracks and their body was cut into. Now the ghost drags its upper half to round, making a scratching sound or the teke teke sound. She must move pretty quickly without legs

because if someone encounters her at night, she will quote, chase them and cut their body in half. End quote. Jesus. How will she perform such a task, you ask? Well, she carries around a sc you ask. Well, she carries around a scythe. Some versions of this story have her wander around bathrooms looking under stalls, asking people, which stall has her legs in it. And then she doesn't like

your answer. She cuts you in half and takes your legs. Well, jokes on her. I have terrible legs. Yeah. Ticket, ticket in the demon from its hollow should get together and form a pretty sure I can jog away from this haunting club. Now, on to Thailand for more woman ghosts. This is a pregnant woman who gets into one of the small taxis in Bangkok. They're called took took, which is like a motorized Rick Shaw. And if you've ever seen these like three wheels.

In any case, this pregnant ghost will get in the cab. While the cab is driving along, she'll disappear from the back of the cab and sometimes wind up hanging upside down from a nearby tree. I like to do. Yeah, right. So the victim of a jealous husband,

the ghost also said to row a ghost boat in the waterways there. So acrobatics and rowing seemed like good ways of exercise to, if you're like a pregnant ghost, that seems like a good way to stay in shape. Okay, I love that the origin of this is very obviously pregnant women getting motion sick and bailing on tuk tuk which if you've ever been in one,

would make Buzz Aldrin blow his fucking trunks. Right. And so the driver looked back after she did that and is like, ghost, only explanation. What was it, ghost? I feel like Thailand is embarrassed by this one, right? Like all the other countries are sitting around going, like, yeah, no, we've got this equestrian,

suicide advocate with a hat. Oh, that's a question of getting ghost lady, steals your legs as a bathroom. And then Thailand's like, we have a ghost lady in her 123rd trimester that stiffs cabbies. Oh, boat. All right, staying in Thailand. And this one's a little involved admittedly.

It's the legend of Maymok. A woman, according to this story, was pregnant, and her husband was conscripted when away to war. While gone, his wife and child died during childbirth. But when he returns home, she's just there with the baby. The neighbors of course try to warn him that his brides are ghosts, but shortly after the warning, they wind up dead. One day, husband's returning home and his wife is making numb prick, which is like a chilly, base dip in Thailand.

Nice. And she drops a line. She's on the second floor balcony, it falls to the ground. She just reaches down, extending her arm all the way to the ground and picks it up. And the husband's like, okay, she's a ghost. Now I get it, she's a ghost. So after bed that night, he goes downstairs to pee and he just high tails it out of there. His wife gives chase and this is great, but it's caught by an exorcist with a ghost jar

and throws her in the river. Sometimes part two of this story, someone finds the jar in the river and lets the spirit out and the second part and sometimes end with a monk explaining to the murderous spirit that her husband will meet her in the afterlife and she disappears. Okay, so just to be clear in this story, the good guy leaves his wife in the middle of the night because she cleaned up after her mess while she was cooking for him. Yes. How's it going to say?

No man leaves a marriage because he finds out his wife is super naturally bending. Okay. We got some uses for that reach. Okay. Let's do one more from Bangkok. My butt hole. Yeah, because like so far, Thailand's ghosts have been a big ass disappointment. Try harder with this one.

Okay. Okay. A young man driving home late one night is waved down by two beautiful women. They're both dressed head to toe and black. They ask if he can take them to a temple called Wat Samayanari. I don't know if I'm pronounced in that correctly. He of course agrees and he drives these ladies to the destination. The whole time he's trying to chat him up, but he's getting nowhere. They don't answer him and they give short replies and he thinks that they just must be in mourning and that's why they're in all black. When he pulls up

to the temple, he turns to say goodbye and they're not in back. He turns around to see them and they're ghosts now. They're crawling along the train tracks only their top half after being cut in half by the train. In other versions, the guys driving over the tracks and he stalls. He notices the girls are gone and he looks out and he sees them dragging across the tracks and he flees the car just before it's destroyed. I'm sorry, Cecil, but that last one literally sounded like you forgot the second half of a ghost story. So you just retold one from earlier in the episode. Is that what happened, buddy?

It's okay. Nobody's going to be mad. You like skipped a page or Wikipedia. The tie culturally appropriated someone else's ghost story. I think he's half lady. Now, the next stop on our world tour is Ghana. This is a legend of Madam Koi Koi. else's ghost story, I've never heard a person eating and thought, yeah, nom nom, you fucking brieces. I go nom nom. You have been in a table with Eve, he goes nom nom.

Anyway, she's pretty terrible with the kids. She beats them and eventually, and eventually, she gets fired on her way home. She gets into a car accident and dies. Her dying breath, of course, is her wish to get even with those meddling kids. Now, when you're staying late at school, you're in the dorm, you can hear the footsteps she makes

in the hall with the koi, koi sound. In other versions, the students rise up and murderer and then she slowly takes them out one by one, slash her movie style. Last one, guys. This is the legend of the vanishing hitchhiker. Story goes kindly person sees a hitchhiker walking down the road, picks him up after a chat,

and then dropping him off, they find something in the car that belongs to the hitchhiker, and it has an address. They go to the address and return the item, and then they find out that the person died, most likely in a car accident. Another version of this was the hitchhiker is borrow, like borrowers a jacket from the driver because they're cold. And then at some point the hitchhiker is let out and the driver finds out that the person's

dead goes to the grave and finds the jacket draped over the gravestone. And still other versions, it happens on a train and people on a train have a conversation. One asks the other what they're reading and they reply that they're reading a book about ghosts. When the reader asks the other person, if they believe in ghosts, they respond that they don't. And then the reader promptly disappears a ghost the whole time. Okay, 45% of Americans believe the same trick

works with viruses. Actually. Just. And if you had to summarize what you've learned in one sentence over these past two weeks, Cecil, what would it be? We sure do love to tell stories about women dying. Don't we? We do indeed. And are you ready for the quiz?

All right, let's move on and do the quiz. Sounds good. All right, Cecil, many of these stories feature ghostly murdered women. Why? Hey, hellhath, no fury like a woman mourned. Okay, that's it. That's it. That's the only pun you said. I thought it was one. A singular pun. Fine. A, but it's low effort. Low effort. Low effort. Thank you very much. A minus. It's a good one. I mean, it's a good one, but there's only one. I'm just saying low effort low effort high effort. Thank you very much. A minus. It's a good one.

It's a good one, but there's only one. I'm just saying low effort. There were three bad ones. If there were three bad ones and that one at the end, it would have worked. Okay, I say, yeah. Dually noted. Still have one good.

I normally I wouldn't just give away my secret like that. But yeah. All right, so, why do we call these myths urban? I can't wait. Hey, because suburban legends are mostly about promiscuous Canadian girls. Be because rural legends are mostly about horse D. What? See, because as anyone following the news about the Jacksonville Jaguars knows urban means

full of shit. So it's a pretty niche one there. I didn't expect to get one. It may last out of Tom or Eli on that one or D because admitting that there are just legends forces us to come to grips with the fact that we're not inherently superior to all other peoples of history. No matter what he says about a trust. I'm just going to choose D because it mentions the atraskin's that's always gonna be the one with the

Atraskin. Yeah, well played. All right, see, so when we die, where will we haunt? Interesting. All right. Hey, that all you can eat buffet that had to add an asterisk to their sign after Tom's dinner. They didn't mean it.

They shouldn't have put it there. B, an Irish airport. No one knows why. If all I do is haunt, then they got off light. See? The medieval battlefield of your dreams. Or D, Edinburgh. The place where we all died. D, we sure fucking did. Did we? That's right, you win. You win.

All right, well, I'm going to choose you for Jita to do an assay next week, Kila. Woo! Since we were doing untrue shit anyway, it's a bit of a pain. Might as well just keep it up. Everyone's got the taste for it. All right, well, for Tom, Cecil, and Noah, let me lie, Bosnick, thank you for hanging out with us today.

We'll be back next week and by then, I will make everyone regret letting me write an essay on something else. Between now and then you can check out our various podcasts, and hey, if you see Heath, can you tell them to call us? It's been a while. And if you'd like to help keep this show going, you can make a per episode donation at patreon.com, slash citation pod, or give us a five star review everywhere you can.

And if you'd like to get in touch with us, check out past episodes, connect with us on social media or check the show notes. Be sure to check out citation pod dot com. And then you bounced away? No, no, I ran it to the filter for pops and stuff. Well, it's still that size. Oh, no, that's smart. Yeah, yeah.

Guys, guys, Eli, what happened? I'll call an ambulance to get in the phone. The queen of chaos. She's escaped into the podcast, the verse. She's coming. No. Absolutely. You can't bring fucking D&D minus villains

into our other shows. What is the homies' particular? Absolutely not. No, still no, no. Boo. It's November 3rd.