Clinton Jaws - Sorry About Last Night | Ep 02

Episode Date: August 3, 2022

Ex Police Officer finds his dead childhood friend on a wellness check.  Clinton Jaws describes the time he almost got aids from an infected person he arrested.  Police taking the HIV cocktail can be damaging. All hospitals need to make police priority when they attend with mental health subjects.   call the hotline [phone] Clinton Jaws: Official Website https://www.clintonjaws.com https://thegoldenbadge.comJoin this channel to get access to perks: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCWxFkykJzUk32iGqzSzXNYQ/join https://www.instagram.com/clintonjaws/ https://open.spotify.com/show/3hWntbop6gLEg6RFR0aOzJ https://www.facebook.com/clinton.jaws.7/ https://twitter.com/ClintonJaws

Hey, get into it. Yo, what? Get into it. You're so grumpy now. I hope you play a clip of the music video. It's so good. She's crazy like a fool. I have no topics.

I've got topics. So, this is your podcast, then. No, it's yours. No. I want it to be yours. I don't want it to be mine. The pressure is on you. No pressure.

I don't want people seeing my tits right now, and I can't do it up for some reason. Daddy cool. I sound exactly like it when I do that. Oh, that's way better. I don't like you starting off angry. You know what? Let's burn some sage. Okay, because I said what?

I can just tell you're mad. Let's just shake it off, and we're going to just wing it. They told us, I feel like we're pressured. I do, you know. We did get pressured, but this is the praise. And I got, I can't put the buttons in. Okay. You can put buttons on.

Just take your time. Remember, have I ever told you the story about Paul? The button guy. You don't like the story because I, I say things that you don't like. Okay, Paul. And I told you the story once, and you didn't even flicker to a laughter. Okay, well, let's hear it now. Maybe I wasn't listening.

Paul. Now you still won't find it from there. Okay, who is it? It's obviously a button story, so those are always. good. This is a police story, actually. I'll tell you the truth. I put them in a headlock in grade six. Where? Okay. Grade six. See, I can't do it. Is this inside out? No. It's inside out. Make sure it's inside out. That's why. Inside pocket? Because I see a pocket there. Is this not inside out? Okay. So me and the park are in grade six. I had, uh, I had him in a headlock. It was, uh,

It was during the John Howe at Mad Hatter's days. It was at nighttime. Man, he made me so angry. I was so mad at him. He was like, hey, Clay, what are you going to do? What are you going to do? And so I jumped off my desk. This is middle of the classroom?

It's not recess. It's like, it's at seven at night because we had the Mad Hatters. It was like a carnival that they had. Okay. So you're in a classroom. In a classroom. And Paul pissed me off so much. And so I threw him in a headlock.

And for the first time ever, my dad picked me up, which was really weird. And he's watching all this. But he's outside. He's outside. The door's open? He's peeking in. Yeah. And he goes, and I got Paul in a headlock.

Like the tightest headlock. you'd ever see I just want to kill him what did Paul say to you he was making fun to me what did he say I don't know I think you know

no that was that's the later story about the buttons okay and then I so I got Paul on a headlock oh am I am I boring you with the story

I'm taking a drink so are people not allowed to drink I got Paul in the headlock. I got Paul in the headlock. I was really worried that me and Paul was going to hurt me. So I got him in a tight headlock

and all of a sudden I hear and I look up and it's my dad standing at the doorway. Come on. Let's go. And I'm like and I'm like

and I let go. I freaked out. I'm like I'm in trouble. I'm in trouble because I have Paul in this headlock my dad is going to be so mad at me I don't think your dad's going to be mad at you for this I know Wayne it's very cool so we start walking I'm beside my dad and we start walking pieces it's like a I'd say a summer's Eve it's 11 second walk to the

car okay and I'm like oh I'm in so much trouble because my dad just caught me no your dad's gonna think my dad just caught me no with this guy in a headlock Mm-hmm. And you know what he said to me? Good job, son. No, no, not that far. What do you say? Pretty good headlock that you had that guy.

Yeah, exactly. Right. What was that all about? And I'm like, I don't know, I don't know. What was it about buttons? And that's all he said. Well, it's a pretty good headlock. Yeah.

And I thought, F and A. F and A. And that's, that. That's the dad I want to be where you don't have to say so much. You don't have to say so much. And that's how bosses should be with the RCMP, with any police force. You don't have to say things. Right.

You don't have to reg on people. No. And when you see bad, maybe it's good. Maybe it's actually good. If you trust the person, your dad trusted you in that moment, knew that that guy needed a headlock. But is this about buttons? Like, where do the buttons come in? I can't even hear you.

Where do the buttons come in? Yeah, you're going to have to talk into the microphone. I am, right? Okay. I'll just, right here. By the way, I like your white shirt. This one? Yeah.

It's way better than the last episode. And it's Fallon, guys. Hi. It's Fallon. Yeah. We did a podcast. This is, sorry about last night. podcast episode two and i asked her if she would come again and she's come twice yeah yeah it's

nice it is will you come multiple times oh my god clint what tell me about the buttons i'm just asking you a question will you come multiple times well yeah stop it have you done that before Clinton Jaws. Remember when we were out and someone said Is that Clinton Jaws? You tell the story. Oh, you want me to tell the story. You're dying for me to tell the story.

I already told it on the podcast. Go ahead. No, no, if it's been told. No, I want to hear somebody else's... I don't want to see somebody else's side of it though. That's good. That's good. That's good. That's good. I like that. And light up... I'm going to light up a cigarette while you... Say that story.

Go. Someone recognized you. You have to the end. Talk to the camera. Talk to the camera. No, I'm not going to play it all up. Someone saw you and they were like, Clinton Jaws,

my brother's sister's friend watches your podcast. That's a great story, Phelan. And then he said a lot of things, actually. He talked to you for a while. Is that your setup to the story? I mean, I don't want to, like, just pump your tires here. Okay. Because you already told it, you said.

Okay, we'll skip over it then. Okay, let's back up. So we're sitting at, okay, do you not want it? We're sitting at the Garrick's Head Pub. I don't know if I wanted it. Maybe people want to hear it. Oh, is it Garex? We're sitting at Gerex Head Pub.

See, I didn't know which pub it was. It was by that Japanese Irish Time pub. We're at downtown Victoria, right in the heart of things. Okay, why did the girls wear kiltz at an Irish times? Isn't that, kiltz aren't Irish? They're Scottish. So why are they wearing kilts? You're right.

What the F is up with that? And they look like Christmas trees. They don't look good anymore. They look old. Those kilts. Have you seen them? It's also very dusty in there. They're nasty.

Well, if you go in there. The kilts are nasty. If you go in there, they put you up on the second floor and then they have like a bunch of bubbles and chotchkes like up on shelves and they're dusty, like really, really dusty. It's very dirty in there. But it's a tourist place. And their kilts are good. gross. It's not even a nice sparkly kilt. You want a sparkly kilt.

I went over there and I was like, what is that? Really? Yeah. You want to kill with sparkles. And you know they're wearing underwear underneath that. That's BS. That's also not kill like. No.

No. It's not authentic. But it's not, why is it an Irish? Are you sure that was the Irish Times or was that Barden Banker that they were wearing kilts? Are you positive? You might be right. That's Irish Times.

You might be right. But the sculptish. The Scottish wear the kids. I think do Irish people wear kiltz? I really don't know. Now, we're going to look like fools if they do. No, I think they're going to like the story. Well, you're right.

So we're sitting at Garrick's Head Pub. And it's the four of us. You've got to speak it on the mic. It's the four of us. We're sitting there and someone walks by and he, we had only been sitting there for two minutes, I think. That was the really wild part. That's all it takes.

Yeah, two minutes. Somebody walked by and he grabbed his sunglasses like this and he was like. Oh, you've seen that? I didn't see that. No, that's not true. Nobody does that. He grabbed the sunglasses? I was going to say you went like, what, what, what, look, look, like. Oh, did he or not? No. I was just embellishing.

Oh, you're making up stories. And he was like, but he, this part's true. He said, Clinton Jaws. And I was like, what? I've never heard you be called Clinton Jaws before. I'm not called Clinton Jaws between you and I. So as soon as he said that, I'm like, this is a family. This is somebody who has seen the show. How rare.

How unusual. Then he said it again. Yeah. Clinton Jaws? Really nice guy. You know it's funny that we're talking about one person that acknowledged me. Yeah. Well, that's what I'm saying.

It's like a rare thing. Like how could anybody even recognize you? You're so wildly unpopular. Just it. Oh, we got to. fan base behind us, don't we? All I'm saying is

it was rare, like it was shocking. That's all I'm saying. I was surprised. I was more surprised than I was as surprised as anyone. Can you do me a favor? Can you help me with this button? I can't.

I can't figure out the hole. Is it upside down? Is it inside out? Is my shirt inside out, guys? Yeah. No, it doesn't look like it. So why can't? Oh, there's no pocket.

Yeah, it is. No, there is a pocket. It looks like they're on the other side. You know what pissed me off about that guy? He didn't ask for a picture. He's probably watching right now. No, actually, he doesn't like my episodes. No, so.

Yeah, I said, I said, we just did a podcast with Fallon. No, no, no. No, no, hold on. He goes, you interrupted. No, I didn't interrupt. It was creepy.

No, I did not interrupt it. It was not creepy. But I did say. I'm going to finish. I'm going to finish the story. Okay. No,

what are you going to tell lies? Okay. So you went, you had to make it about yourself. You're like, did you see me? Oh, you're copying Tommy when he said,

yeah, I did make it about myself. I was on the podcast and I'm like, okay. Stealing Tommy's joke. She was on podcast 100. Wow. And he's like,

no, no. No, Oh, I didn't watch that one. You know what? You're just stealing Tommy's joke because Tommy said, you had to make it about yourself. And he was.

Oh, it's so true, though. It was. True. Well, I just wanted to be part of it. It was such a great moment. You are a great guest, though. I just wanted to be part of it. Like, let me be part of it.

And then he was just immediately rejected me. He's like, no, I've absolutely not seen that. I skipped over that one. Can I say something? We were talking about something earlier, and then I didn't finish my story, and I can't remember what that was. The button.

You said I get to hear about it later. Because I met, guys, you got to listen to this. Because as a police officer, I met up with Paul again. Did I tell you this? Ever? I don't know. So I'm over at Paul's house and I know you don't like it when I talk about this, but we're in his, his mom said, come on over for a birthday cake, Clint.

And we're sitting around the table. And the mom goes, you know how you put money in cakes? This is the money cake story. Yeah, I do know. You hated it when I told it before. No, I just like. You didn't like my accent because it sounded. What?

I don't remember this at all. Okay, tell it. Like, I'll be hearing it for the first time because I don't remember it. Yeah. Okay. So the money cake story. Money cake. I can't stand a birthday cake filled with money.

I don't think. Anyone does it anymore. It was a thing when we were younger. They would put 25 cents in. They would put. Didn't they wrap it? They wrapped it, right? And tinfoil?

A lot of people didn't when I was a kid. They were just, it would just be money. Who would want a nickel? Oh, wow. I got the birthday cake with a nickel or a dime. It's bad. And the big deal was a quarter because that's the biggest money that you can get. Right.

They didn't even have loonies back then. That's right. Yeah. So I go to Paul's house. and her mom makes a money cake, but she puts buttons in it. I think I did like this story. It's sounding familiar. She puts small buttons and big buttons.

The small buttons. We're times. What? The big buttons were cord. Oh, so you would at the end of the day exchange it? Yes. Wait, were the buttons metal? Because wouldn't they?

No, they're just buttons, okay? Don't go, like, go weird. They're just buttons. No, but if you bake up. plastic button in a cake. Can I just finish the story? I'm finding. No, she put it in after.

She stuffed him in. And then Paul. That's weird. With his mouth open. In the back of his tongue. He goes, Mom. Drop the big button.

It is dangling. I got the big button. Is that the big button? And I'm looking. Okay, no, no, I'm not done. Can we wrap it up? No, he kept on saying it. I see, you hated this first.

I told this story about six years ago, and you still hate it. Okay. And I seen the button swirl around the back of his tongue. No, you did. I swear to God, I'll never forget it. It's ingrained in my head. And I went home. I went home.

I'm like, that's disgusting. That's gross. That Paul did that. I didn't like it. Okay. You're told my parents. parents. It's the most disgusting thing. We got a quarter for it.

You got a quarter for it? He got a corner. What did you get? What kind of button? I didn't know. No. I didn't even eat the cake. Oh, come on.

It was grade six. It was the worst birthday party ever. That's a grade six birthday party? You know it was funny? Like Asher and Lori, I think they live in the same house as Paul, next door to it. I don't know why that's funny. Maybe he'll watch this and remember, and he'll call in with his. His version.

He won't because I showed up one day as a police officer. Paul's dead as fuck. Oh. Oh, that's really sad. It is sad. Oh, man. And I'm like, I look at him and I'm like, fuck, dude.

Did you think about the button story? Oh, right away. Oh, it's really messed up. I shouldn't have said face flashes. I think you're going to have to take this part out. I might. You can't leave it in. And you got to take it out.

And. Maybe you have to beep out his name. That's what you got to do. That's crazy. You're not supposed to touch it, A Ben. It can kill you, right? No, I know. I know.

Crazy. Yeah. Poor little. Oh, that's sad. There's a tragic story to a cute, tragic end to a cute story. Very dark. Yeah, bugged me. It bothered me.

Yeah, of course. How are we going to come back from this? We've got to change the moon now. Stop. Did you get your buttons figured out there? Did you get at least one done up? What was the best part about today, Clint? You're not having fun, are you?

I'm depressed about Paul. Yeah, I wish you wouldn't have told that story. Where'd that come from? Started with buttons. You made it dark and weird. We weren't that close. It's just weird to grow up in your hometown where you have to then go to calls where... It was so strange to come to the hometown.

Because we were supposed to... like continue with life. Right. And like talk about that. Like I was supposed to one time talk about that with him and say, hey, remember, dude, remember I had you in that head luck. Rubber the button cake. Yeah.

And it was so many memories with the guy and we weren't, we weren't really good friends. Yeah. But it was just like a guy that bug me, right? Yeah. But it was a good bug. And he would, he would sit behind me and he would do this with a shirt and you go, what's that he didn't like the sleeves oh and you go like this you'd go oh and then go teacher he's doing it again and mrs hillman would go stop it paul stop it maybe he was on the spectrum a little bit oh

great sex spectrum what does that mean autism like oh no no no he was he was totally sane no autism does not mean insane you just call them autistic No, it doesn't mean insane to be on the spectrum. Some people with autism don't like to wear gloves and stuff. It's just like... We can't hear you when you don't talk into the... Wait, just hold on. Oh, what do you got there?

Oh. I'd like more ice, but... Okay, hold on. We'll get more ice. Can I... Guys, we need more ice, please. Can you hurry? Don't move the camera, though, please. Can we have some ice, please?

She's peeing right here. Oh, my. God, good one. Can I have a little? Can I have a lot. Can you help me out with that? Well, if you go this way, you can't, we need a ton of ice.

She was actually going to move the video camera. Can I have some ice? Like, it's way over there. Like, it's a mile away. I swear to God, if you hear a cord, it's going to be fresh beatens in the morning. You know what? You've got to do that every now and then.

You got to freshly beat your woman. Is that so bad? No. That is bad, isn't it? It's really bad. Of course it's bad. Have you ever got freshly beaten? No.

How that? No. No? No, nobody freshly beat you? No. Not even stale beating. Ready? Yeah, go ahead.

How has being a cop changed the way that you are as a person and the way that you, like, watch people? and be around people because you notice everything about people. It's weird. Like you notice things about people that I don't actually see. Name one thing that you,

if someone, if someone's not taking a drag of a cigarette properly, or if someone, no, you do other things too. You just notice things about people and you like, analyze them. Okay, let's tell, that short story. So we had a couple over the other night. And we're on the boat and they wanted

our cigarettes, but we only had like 10. And they wanted to have a sick. They don't, they're not smokers. They don't smoke. And I'm like, oh, I'm bad. And he's like, can I have a cigarette? And I'm like, no, I don't really want to give you my cigarettes. It's not that I can't afford it. It's just that I don't have any to give you. Right. And then when he does take it. We're out on a boat too. Like we can't get more. Go say yes. We're also out on a boat. Like we can't go get more.

There's nowhere to get more. He's not inhaling it. Right. So why wouldn't I notice that? Well, I didn't notice it. Yeah, but you're not looking. You're not paying attention. I'm just wondering, is that from being a cop or is that just you?

No, it was always me. I think it was always me. This is all this. This is the stuff that I always noticed. And you've always been like that with the, A lot of different things, though. You just, I can't really give you examples, but just in knowing you, you notice things about people that are, I don't know, it's just not something I would notice. And then later, you mention it.

Keep on talking. Okay. Well, you notice things about people and I don't notice them. Makes me wonder why you notice them. I don't know what to say. Talk more. Okay. I just increase your levels.

They were way too low. They were low. And you were giving me a hard time. Like you wanted me to be right up on this. There we go. Now we're good, eh? Halfway in. Yeah.

Anyways, I was just wondering, because I don't know if it's, because I didn't really know you before you were a cop. I met you right after you became one. I feel like you think that that is like a special quality that I had. Why do you think, like, is that a big deal? Is that such a big deal? No, no. I just wondered if it came from being. a cop because it's unusual that I notice things you know so is is that like are you

attracted that quality of me what I am I attracted to that quality yeah do you like that quality I mean I find it interesting because you pick up on things that I don't notice so I'm like I just I find it interesting is it attractive you notice stuff that I don't notice her you notice stuff I don't notice is that a big deal no it's not a big deal But you brought it up. It was something that I was actually wondering. You're like, Clint, notice us things. No, I was just wondering.

I was just wondering if it comes from interrogating people and like having to assess everybody that you pull over. Or if you were just always like that. Okay. You know what I think it is? I'll tell you. I think there's certain levels of common sense with people. Right. And I don't have those because I don't notice.

But we're not talking about you right now. What are you talking about? I haven't finished the story. Please finish. There's certain levels of common sense. Okay. The best cop is a cop with common sense. Okay.

Like everybody says, you know, honesty and tragedy and credibility. It's actually common sense. Like that should be the core values of the RCMP. And when they interview you, they should be interviewing your common sense. How can you judge that though? Like nobody has it. That's a story that you just told.

You just told a story about me with common sense because I can see it. I guess it's just paying attention to people, which I don't necessarily do. Maybe that's what it is. It's common sense. And so many bosses don't pay attention

to individuals. Right. They don't use their common sense because you know why? They don't have any. They don't have any common sense. Right. That's the problem with RC&P bosses.

That's the problem with police bosses. And I don't even know if I'm making sense because we just got off the boat and I'm ripped as a rat. I'm kind of like going in circles. But the only reason I noticed that was because of common sense. I think people have certain stages of common sense.

I think it's stage one, stage two, stage three, stage four. stage four is poor common sense it's like uh think of your best friend or one of your good friends that has no common sense and then think of me top notch i think you overanalyze though that's what you need to do yeah to be a good cop maybe over analyzing is not over no it's analyzing perfectly well it's sometimes there's a lot why tell me why because things bother you that I don't notice about people tell me more it's hard to think of examples clint but just you notice things about people and you bring them up later you're like did you

notice this and I'm like yeah I guess I didn't really think about it but I guess that's true but why is that a bad thing it's not a bad thing unless it bothers you about people oh I mean I don't go I don't go into my crib and start crying well I'm not saying you're crying I don't know I was just asking if it was something that it came naturally to you or what? Jesus, did my voice go shrill? I don't know. I was just asking if it was something that you...

Okay. I'm sorry. I got some dogs barking. Your dog back first. My dark barked back louder. I don't think we should get off this topic just yet. Okay. Because I don't think we're telling the viewers if it's a good thing or a bad thing.

I guess it depends. Like, does it make you... If it makes you... No, when you say that you notice things that other people don't notice. Are you saying that's a good thing or a bad thing? Depends on if it makes you not like people or not. Does it make you not like people? I don't know.

Maybe it messes up. Like, maybe becoming a cop. You have to be very observant of people. Oh, you're so right there, though. Yeah. You know why you're right. That's a good point. I don't really like people.

If it makes you not like people that you notice all the people, things. That's all. I hope the dogs bark one more time. I think they will. Yeah. And then they're just going to sit behind us and go, that's good. They're barking. Yeah. I guess I just maybe it would make you, like if you have to always be analyzing people, maybe you continue. I don't always analyze. I just naturally do. Naturally do. But is that something you got from, I guess I was just wondering if it makes you a different person. I think it's kind of draining. Yeah. I think it's kind of draining. Like, can you turn it off? I don't think you can turn it off? I don't think you can turn it off. I think, oh, you know what? After I retired, I think I've, uh, like, remember how mad I was?

Yeah. When I was a cop. At first, no, because at first you loved it. Then what happened? Then you got mad. But at first you were like quite happy doing it. Tell me about the times I got angry. Do you remember? I think you just saw some stuff. No, I'm not talking about seeing, like, I'm talking about like, when you hung out with me. Really? Yeah. Yeah, you got pretty mad. Tell me the moments.

Really? No, I don't know. You guys, you... That's a good talk. No, it's not really a good talk. I mean... Tell me the moment. Do you just, you were always,

you guys were always, you were always fighting with your wife because you were always grumpy. Jesus Christ, I don't know. I'm just talking, I'm not talking about my wife, I'm just talking about, I was always grumpy?

Yeah. Well, I think you guys were fighting because you were grumpy, because you were angry. And she was happy. Well, who could be happy but somebody was always mad? That's true.

Yeah. Yeah. Do you remember the moments where I got angry? Mm-mm. You don't? Nope. So maybe I wasn't that mad.

I don't know. My question was just how does it, like, how does that change you to just? But it turned into a question about, because you've known me a long time. Right. Where.

where did you see my change? You've been through a few. You're like a butterfly right now. Okay, when's the last time that you seen a negative change in me? No, no, that's been a long time. How, okay, tell me. That's incredible. Why?

Because that's like a compliment. That you negatively changed? No, that you haven't seen it in a long time. Okay. When's the last time? I don't know. five years ago maybe three years ago 2015 I can't remember the time like but a few years ago like what's five years ago from 2020 well I got to think like because the years have kind of slipped

away through COVID and stuff so 22 21 20 2019 2018 yeah around there 2017 2017 yeah oh that was bad that was a bad year that was terrible that bad year yeah and you haven't seen it since no not at all no a little bit maybe Well, I mean, you are who you are. Everybody gets mad. You were just mad. You were an angry person for a while. Oh, God, yeah.

Yeah. Isn't that something? Yeah. What was I angry at? I don't really know. He never told me. He never sat down and said, like, this is what I'm mad about, but you were mad at everybody. You never asked.

Well. That was kind of rude. Well, why didn't you ever sit me down and go, Clint? What are you so? matter yeah i guess i should have i let you down a little bit that's something i would have did with you i would have sat you down well you seemed like you were angry with people and around you that you cared about jesus christ so i just thought you didn't like everybody basically anyone he cared about yeah they were pain in the ass for me back then everyone that loved you you were at

of them. Who wouldn't be? Stop loving me. Stop loving me so much. I don't like it. Stop being such a great brother-in-law. Oh. Oh.

So you remember that? No, I'm just saying. Me and my brother-in-law getting into a flight one night. Just saying people who loved you. Me and my brother-in-law, he came over one night. And we went to. to the ground. I heard there was a lawn chair thrown.

We attacked each other. It's funny that I say we attacked each other, but, oh, that was, that was horrific. Yeah. What a great podcast. Yeah. I think we'll have to do another one tomorrow. What do you think? Do you want to do one tomorrow?

Yeah, of course. Or we could do it Saturday. I think this is just a warm up. How long are you staying for it? Monday. And you know what? Thank you for coming for Sorry About Last Night, Episode 2. This is Episode 2A.

We're going to do it. This isn't really, this is just the, like, we're just going to have clips. I'm going to show, yeah, this might not work out. But it was nice. You know what's funny about Sorry About last night? I'm at Fallon's House. I'll just keep this short and quick. We went to Fallon's House.

Sweet. Last week. Keep it short and sweet. And she goes to bed. She goes to bed early. On the second night. I'm aghast. Second night.

Goes to bed. After a full day. Drinking all day. And when I wake up in the morning to leave, because we're leaving the next day, it's like 9. It's like 7.30 in case she goes to bed. And I wake up. 10.30. And she says to me, Clint, are you sorry about last night?

Do you have anything to say sorry about? I'm like, what are you talking about? This is the story. And I'm thinking, don't you have a lot of things to be sorry about? I thought we worked this out. Why'd you go to bed, Fallon? Because... Why'd you ruin the night?

You ruined the night. But why did you think... What? You ruined the night. What did I do? Let's just pause it here. Just quickly, quickly. You for two hours complained about me looking.

too relaxed. What? And we could not talk about anything. Okay. So I said to, I said to Fallon. My hand was in my head. No. You looked too relaxed.

No. My hand was like this and you were like, I shouldn't have come. I'm going to leave. I shouldn't have gone. Yeah, you said I'm going home. I can't believe you're being like this because I was going like this. I didn't say I was going home. Oh yeah.

You did. You said I shouldn't have even come here. Oh, I think you're exaggerating. No. No, no, no. Do you want to bring on a third party witness? Don't you think I said, Fallon, why are you being so boring?

For two hours, you harassed me for looking comfortable hanging out with you guys. You're like this. Yeah, because I had my head in my head. I was tired. We got up early and went out. She was tired at 7.30. Yeah, second night, too.

We were up the night before. Are you tired now? Maybe I am feeling tired now. I'm feeling really tired. I'm going to go to sleep. See, I think that's what you do. I think you do that out of anger. You're like, I'm going to pretend to be tired.

Oh, wow. You think of that manipulative? No. Aren't we all? No. We always want to get back of people. Oh, my goodness. My word.

Okay, how about this one? I said, it's really nice to sit out here, felon, with no music. Mm-hmm. And you're like, clit. Do you want me to bring the music out? Yeah, it was, it was, it was 10.30 and the neighbors start yelling at, no, neighbors start yelling at 11. My neighbors.

Fall in it was 7.30. Nope. At 7.30, we were walking to the comedy show. Nope. Yep. This comedy show started at 7. No, it started at 8. We walked there at 7.30.

Then I had to go to the park. 8.30. Then I had to go to the park to get the kids because they were scared. Then I came back. Yeah. So 8.30? No, it was 10.30. So you went to bed at that 30?

10.30, yeah. And I slept like a baby with no regrets. But we were guests at your house. Yeah. Could you imagine? Yep. If you came down for one night. One night, you weren't down for one night. Two nights. Yeah, but the first night sucked because you're like, hey, we got Justin over here.

Okay. Okay. Okay. Should we, I think we should just... Okay. Clinton Jaws guys subscribe. So unsubscribe. Let's call it. He's a jerk. Okay. Bye-bye.

These are nice glasses. They aren't they? Yeah, they are. Put them at a garage sale. Can't tell. This is the best podcast you've ever done. Oh, I'm talking into it. Oh, there you go. Yeah, you can hear me. Now do you hear yourself?

I could hear myself before. But you can't, you can't be like this. Okay. You can't be like this. This is the best. the best podcast I've ever It has to actually, there has to be effort Into speaking. Well, that microphone's a lot better.

Like look how far away we were. No, so this one is an M58. It costs me a ton of money. That one's better. I like that one. Okay, I'll shut it off. He's a walking advertisement for cocaine. I fucking love that.

He is so strong out. He is buzzing. Looks like he hasn't eaten a meal in a week. Daddy Daddy, Daddy, His eyes are possessed Daddy, Daddy, cool Is he really dead?

He's dead? Oh, I would assume he is. This is like 1970s. Maybe he's got a tell-all book. No, he's a dead man. He got AIDS. He burned bright. You definitely got AIDS.

Wow, I don't know about that. Everybody's having sex with that guy. That's a daddy cool guy. Oh, yeah. His eyes, he's strung out. AIDS. I think he died of an overdose. Have you ever gotten AIDS before?

No. I got AIDS twice. Tell me about that. Forget the story. When the guy spit in your eye. Oh, yeah, you remember that. You actually know about this? Yeah.

What's the story then if you know? You tell the story. It was your birthday. Oh, wow. I didn't even know that. Yeah. Are you serious? Yeah.

It was my birthday. I think it was your birthday. And then a guy... Why would you remember that it was my birth? That's unbelievable. Because it's kind of messed up. It was messed up. Okay.

And then you arrested the perp. I just wanted to say perp. We've never, no cop in their entire lives. That's too bad. That's too bad. You're missing an opportunity. Maybe Canadian cops. You just start saying perp.

Perp walk. It's a perp walk. But that's racist, isn't it? No, it's a perpetrator. No, they'll find something. No, you cannot. It has to be subject of complaint. So the perp.

Yeah, there's no, you can't call anybody a perp. Okay, well, perp is all colors. Any color could be a perp. Okay. So the perp. Keep on going. It's your birthday. I love that you remember this.

You arrested him. And he's spit. it in your eye. Is that the story? That's all I got. Are you serious? Then what happened after? What did I do?

I think you had to go to like the hospital and get some some jamba juice and checked it into you, some sort of. No? Yeah. Yeah. You had to go and get some stuff. You're kind of right. Mm. So his name was Jimmy and he was a big mother effort like felon three times bigger than me and being Brad Sautchuk went into his house and he spat all over his girlfriend.

His girlfriend was soaked and he was 19 years old. His girlfriend was soaked. That's disgusting. But you know what I remember? The amount of saliva that he can produce this guy. That's crazy. It was nuts. Because when I heard the story, I just thought it, I assumed it was a single spit in your eye.

Sorry, I'm getting the stories confused. I didn't realize it was a spitter. I'm getting the stories confused. Because I got spit out twice. Three times. Can we get back to the Jimmy story later? We can go through it right now. Let's go back to when I got AIDS.

Okay. Are you even interested? Why are we always talking about me? What's your podcast? I'm just here to kind of pump your time. Are you, like, because I wouldn't hear about you. I don't have a lot to talk about. You got a sexy life.

You know, you do. I'm just here to say that you have a million dollar home. No, the bank has a million dollar home. No, you do. You know, the bank owns it. And you got a sexy boyfriend. That's true. Which, my girlfriend.

Yep, your girlfriend? My wife? It's getting serious. My wife wants to marry your husband. That did come out. We could play the clip. Don't do it. If I was 10 years younger, I would marry Tommy.

Play the clip. She said that. Play in the clip. No. You got to cut it out. Okay, so the aid story is, I'll make it quick. Piece is boring. Like, I know I'm going to bore the F out of you.

I'm just going to check out. Will you tell it? So I pull over a guy. No, no, I arrest him. I go back to the detachment. I pull, we go into cells. The perp. With the perp.

And the drawers, the drawers on the cell door, they come down. You know those drawers? It shuts. And I take this guy out. And I'm like, hey, we'll call him, I don't know, Dawson. Let's call him Dawson. No, that's. It's actually too good of a name.

Let's call him Henry. Oh, here we go. Technicality. This? You know what that is? That's a phone. Is it yours? That's hard going.

Glant. So, just I am in a long time. I don't have a phone in here. And so I bring them out of the car and we start. God, you always yawn when I tell stories. I was it yawning. Anyways. I'll do it quickly.

I took him out of the car and he looks at me and he starts talking to me and accidentally spats all into my eyeballs. That's not good. Like it went right in my eye. Yeah. Like right inside my eye. That was your birthday. No, like right inside.

Like inside. Like right in there. Like right inside. Like right in there. That's disgusting. Inside my eye. Inside. Inside my eye.

Like right in there. Like right inside. Like right inside. like directly inside of it right there gross and i knew the guy had something right because we arrested him for a bestiality and i knew that he had chinchivitis that can be really bad what's gingivitis inflammation of the gums bleeding of the gums which is caused by inflammation and he had AIDS we knew he had oh man disgusting yuck so we'll all I went into the cells and I pumped water into my eyes.

Yeah. The emergency eyewa station. Very good. Thank you. It's close. Very good. And then they rush me up to the hospital. Right.

And I see my doctor and he's like, cling! He was Puerto Rican and he called me cling. Yeah. Klang? Maybe I made that part up. Somebody's called you Kling before. for. Tar's called me cling.

When I first met Tara, she had a Chinese accent. Oh, she's worked really hard on that. It's hardly detectable at all. Every time, the phone would ring. Kling! Telephone, cling! Do I have to edit that part out? Definitely take that out.

Then I made fun of her laugh. She's got a cute laugh. She sounds like a... Not back in 2002, when she was like, Kling, you're so far. Funny. No, she has a cute laugh. She sounds like a baddie rubble from the Flintstones.

She's got that like, she's got a little giggle. Did you know that Tara called me Kling? I don't know if I believe that. I think you're going to have to edit some of this out. Kling! Telephone Kling. No? No, not funny.

Not funny. Anyways, that was my doctor. He was talking to me like, Do you want to know something about Duncan Hospital? Duncan Hospital, there was a nurse there that was in love with me. But she was older, older and sexy, and every time I'd go up there with an inmate, she'd be like, you're first in line, man, so we can get you out the door. And that's what I loved about certain nurses.

Because you're a police officer. Like in Port Albarnie, you're a police officer? Go fuck yourselves. Because you should make RCMP members, police officers, priority. But you don't. So we sit there for three, four, five, six hours. What? They don't?

On chef? Yeah. No way. That's your line. You're number 72. No way. But in Duncan, this lady, this nurse, which was unbelievable. It would be priority.

Of course. You guys are working. And I'm saving you money. Yeah. But if you're sitting in there for four hours, that's how you should. Port Alberti. They don't give a rat. Fuck.

Never once gave us priority. And why wouldn't you? Yeah. That's crazy. It's tax payer's money. Yeah. Somebody's sitting there. Sitting there.

He could be saving a life. Get the cop back on the road. But they're too fucking stupid. Yeah. They're fucking idiots. It's not good. Seems obvious, right? I kind of went off there.

didn't I? Yeah. Anyways, so I, the doctor gave me medication. We found out the guy that had AIDS and I went on a 30 day cocktail, which was five pills. That killed me. Yeah, I bet they did. Oh, absolutely killed me. Did you get time off work?

No. Nope. And I never, my first five years of my, uh, my job, I never took a day off because I wanted to be proud. Yeah. I'm like, no, I'm saying a good deal. But you take medication to stop, like shut down your immune system, or I guess to super boost your immune system. I feel like, like I was such a slight dude.

I feel like I was maybe 99 pounds by the end of the 30 days, and I'm still working. Wow. That's crazy. Nobody gave a fuck. They're just like, oh, yeah, Clint's working good. We got a body. The body's filling a shoe. And imagine what that was doing to your immune system because.

It killed it. It killed it. And so one day in the mail, I'll never forget this, in the mail came, this is like a couple months later. They're like, it was a checklist, like check off. Oh, man. Everything, every symptom that you have. And I turned it over. And there was more.

So it was like it was, and it was one of those long letters. You know the legal letters? Yeah. Who came up with that? Why would you come up with a legal letter? So what did you check on? Then you have to get a new printer. To print out the legal?

Yeah. It's not good. So I started... Not at eight and a half by 11, but like an eight and a half by 14 or something. Yeah. Yeah. So I started ticking off everything. And some of the things were...

It kind of actually made me feel good because it was like depressed. Yeah. Are you depressed? Okay. And that's the first time I experienced depression was when I was on that cocktail. And I'm like, yeah. And have you thought of this? And I'm like, yeah.

Then I turned it over and I'm like, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like just, I went to the doctor at one point. This is so boring. But I went to the doctor at one point and I said, the pills are going through me. Like I took pills. Then I went to the washroom and the pills were in the toilet. Half an hour later.

Oh, my God. I know. And that's what he said. He went, you're taking time off. It was right around Christmas time. You're taking time off. And I said, I can't. I don't do that.

Like, I actually said that. And he goes, I said, I can only do it if you force me to. Right. Hoping me would. Please force me. And he goes, I'm forcing you too then. That's good. Oh, thank God.

Yeah. Like even a girl on my watch was like, whoa, there's something wrong with you, Clint. For taking time off? No, looked at me. Oh, yeah. How I was. Yeah. Yeah.

You should have been able to be supported in that and take the time off. That's crazy. That's a really harsh thing to go through. They look the other way. And then also you're like also the mental part about thinking for the month, am I going to have AIDS now? I knew I wasn't going to have AIDS because the doctor said to me, that nurse said to me, there's never ever been one case.

Okay. After you take these pills for 30 days. Right. If you got exposed in some way, minor. It's never happened before. Okay. So at the end of the 30 days, they give you a blood test to see if you have AIDS. Are you just?

Yeah, I made, I beat AIDS. You maids. No, I beat AIDS. Wow. I beat it. I made Survivor. Cheers. Good for you.

It was your birthday, too. It was a good day. I remember that. And then Tara came back home from, because she was in Korea. Did she go to Korea? She did go to Korea once, yeah. And then she came back. Oh, this was then.

I mean, she looked at me. She was like, oh, well. Who's this guy? Really? It was a string. You should post that now, that picture of the boat yesterday with the hat. What the hell are you talking about? Right here.

Edit in that picture of you in the hat. The hat. What do you mean? That picture of you on the boat with the red hat. I had a red hat. I'll check the picture later. You got really mad about the picture. I feel like I blacked out maybe yesterday.

Play the picture. You know what I think we should do? I think we should pretend the podcast is over. Pretend it's over then. And then we just like hang out. Do it. Like have a couple of cigarettes. Finish our drink.

Why don't we just end it then? Let's just say it's over. Okay, it's over. Okay, bye. Bye-bye. That's good. Cheers. Are we cheers?

Cheers and again. We're drunk. I've got for cheers that many times. I've been drunk. You're not anymore. though. Uh-uh. A good drive.

You got sober. Really? No. No. Daddy cool. That video. Daddy. Daddy cool.

I thought we weren't doing the podcast anymore. Daddy cool. It's for us. Yeah, you love it. Years down the road. Daddy. Daddy cool. Are we going to watch this years on the road?

What? Let's play some videos of us years ago. Daddy, Daddy, cool. Not on the podcast, just like. You think I got videos of us? I know you do. Where?

In my fanny pack? Like, what are you talking about? The wedding? Mexico. Oh, you want to, Okay. Do you want to see Fallon right now? Do a speechy?

Here it is. Cut it in. Good speech, Fallon. Thank you. Now I want you to play your speech. You want to see a couple of blurbs from my speech? Blurbs. Play the whole.

thing. 45 minutes? Yeah. Here it is. Here's me. So you're not sorry about you last night you said, I'm sorry. Sort of. You never really even apologize for it.

Yeah, well, you should. I wasn't sorry. You should be. I didn't do anything wrong, though. You did. What? You sat up and complained about me looking relaxed then. Is that a big deal?

Like, I'm going to be so. Hours? We couldn't even talk about anything else because you're like, you're so tired. Are you so tired? I can't believe that you don't take any credit on, like, you thought that you were in the right? You thought you were in the right? Blows my mind. I don't think we're ever going to be able to do this podcast. I don't think we're on in the air anymore, but. Tell people.

Did you really think that? Did you really think that? Did you really think. You still owe me an apology. Why? I just explained it. You were like, mad. But that's not a big deal for somebody to get so mad.

For two hours for you to sit there and be like, why are you just so tired? I was trying to get you up. And you know you were. You were so down in the dumps for some reason. And it was like trying to like, come on, fella. Like even when you're here, I'm like, come on, felon. Like sometimes. And then sometimes you like wake up.

Yeah, like I'm trying to wake you up. I think they're stretching. We should get them back into the mix here Should we? Oh, okay. They're leaving now. I see you again Good seeing you. I think so good. Sorry that I love you. I love with you See you a family. Yay, good to see you. It's always so good to see you Bye thanks for floating with us today You're walking through again? I'm going up Oh my god, I don't listen to him.

You're leaving, did you say? Okay, I thought I said I'm leaving. It's weird, so you keep on walking through here. I know, I'm annoying me, aren't I? No, not at all. I love it. I was just asking you earlier for a hot dog, if you got my head, you bit my head off. You know who you look like right now? Roadhouse Patrick Swayzee.

Remember when he's wearing the jogging pads? And he's got the hair and he's doing the tight team, right? He does. He does. Look at his hair. Oh my god, no. I don't know what else to do. He has some hands, like a normal person.

I don't know what I do. dude got some cans that i like great ash they're just so much i don't know you're kind of it's i'd run a couple glasses with ice it looks so blurry oh i was rubbing my finger on the man just cranking it no you weren't don't do that no you did not yeah i just lick my thumb you're fucking fucking with me yeah so often good job basher Love that one Okay, we're going to need more light than this

Can you fix that buddy? Do you think one of the... Testing, testing. Sounds loud, loud. Testing. Still loud. Remember when I told you to put a rock on it? And you're like, I'm not going to put a rock on it.

He does not a lot. Test, test, test. Yes, yes, yes. I can't because you won't let me wear my glasses because you say I look like a dork. Would it work if the light was like here? No. No?

Why are you on the golf cart right now? We need laps and shit. Should we set it up in my trailer? Yeah, let's... Let's redirect this podcast, and let's take everything apart and go into your trailer. Are you being sarcastic right now?

Let that sound. You just have to unplug it and walk it over there. Unplug it? Put it down. Put it down. Put it down? Put it down? Put it down.

It's getting weird Asher He was willing to hold it the whole podcast I would tie the string to it Can he plug in my computer, Tara? What? Tar can you plug in my computer instead? She's all

Val, look at She's over there plugging in my computer Look at it. Oh, good job. Good job. You're over there plugging in my computer? Look at her.

Look at her. Okay, okay. No, look at. Tara. You plugged my computer in. My computer's right here. My computer's right here. I'm going to ask again.

I don't want people getting mad at me. I'm not being a jerk, but I don't think I should get up again. Should I? No. Tara. Can you plug in my computer, please? You plugged in the hot tub. Tara, can you please plug in my computer?

What? You plugged in the hot tub, Tara. I'm just asking Tara to plug in my computer, but she's plugging in the hot tub. Tara, it's not turning on. Turned down. Can we get the laptop on? Because I want to hear Daddy cool.

Tara. I need the computer cord. The computer cords in there. But she won't listen. Why don't you nicely say where the computer. computer cord is. Sweetie? The computer card's inside.

The computer cord's inside, so I don't know what you're doing. I don't know why you're unplugging things and putting things back in. What are you plugging it? There's no computer cord here right now. Did she just say, my computer's not plugged in? If you look inside the house, there's a computer charger. Oh, really? Yeah.

Oh, I didn't. Nah. I have to get by it. Come on. Do you know where it is, Clint? I would look where every outlet is. And we got four. Do you want to set up in the podcast room?

Here. Yeah, let's set up. No. It's on plugger. I'll help you. Where do you put this? Put this in there. Lynn, stop showing off.

In the back. Oh, God. Please don't. Like, spare me. Well, I was wondering why you were. Is this still too loud? She was telling me She was unplugging the hot tub

Do we put the candle between us? It's a mosquito one Yeah