Club 520 Podcast - It’s 5:20 Somewhere - Pulled Over Hanging Out the Car?! 😂🚔

Episode Date: July 26, 2026

This week on It's 520 Somewhere, the girls take a trip down memory lane and relive one of their wildest moments—hanging out of Freaky Malc's car... only to end up getting pulled over by the police. 😂🚔After sharing that unforgettable story, the conversation shifts to the classic sayings only old-school parents and grandparents could get away with. From hilarious catchphrases to life lessons, you'll probably recognize a few you grew up hearing.And of course, it wouldn't be It's 520 Somewhere without relationship talk. The girls dive into dating, communication, and the realities of modern relationships with their usual honesty and humor.It's another episode full of laughs, nostalgia, and the unpredictable conversations you love.🎙️ Tap in and join the chaos!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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or wherever you get your podcast. Well, welcome back to It is 520 somewhere. I am your girl Barbie. It is still the twins' birthday. To my left, I got the beautiful truck. What did, Mama? Hey. Did you have an amazing birthday?

I did. It was pretty awesome. Not gonna lie. Not gonna y'i. And we got bust down motherfucking key to the right. Let me put your wrist up because. Okay. Yeah.

Seeing Kinky in the club last night, it was so packed. She had like threw her arm up to do something. And I was like, diamonds, diamonds, diamonds on me dancing. I'm like, bitch, you got your watch? Miss Mish going to say, hold on, you being too humble for me. Too humble. I would have been in the club like, don't fuck them all. Don't fuck them out.

Like maybe that wasn't a good song choice. But yeah, Kee. You had an amazing birthday? I did. I did. Honestly, I don't even think I would have really went and got it. if you want to put me on the spot last episode, I'm like, now I've got to do it.

Because we talked about it. Indeed. It did. So I was like, I can't sit on the couch next week without this. Like, I just cannot. And who bought your watch for you? That would be me. Girl, the fuck you me.

Because last night, I kind of got sad. I'm like, damn, I got bad pussy management because why? You were so funny. God damn. No, no. When I bought it, I was literally thinking. And I'm like, because truthfully, I could have been, I could have been dead this. Been being, being.

No funny shit. Like, no funny shit. I could have been dead this. Let them know that you want shit. I feel like for whatever reason when you're a girl, especially when it comes to like, your first watch, you damn near want. It's like a hood trophy a little bit. You kind of want a man to buy it for you.

So I don't know. I was in a relationship for a while and I was like waiting on a nigga to buy it for me. I really could have did it by myself as much shit as I bought that nigga. but he said, don't hold your breath. Right. Don't want to have ever been and I just went ahead and did it for myself.

And I'm so happy for you. Just do it, girls. Girl power. Yes, because you want to cheers to that. Cheers to that. So we got us a girl la la, basically. Oh, nice.

It's a girl la la la la. That's cute. Basically like a strawberry ranch water. So something light because I feel like I am about to pass out. I'm so freaking tired. The limit drop festival. Y'all went outside.

Outside. You know me, I'd be outside until the next day starts. It's ridiculous. Yes. Everybody was looking for you guys yesterday. Oh, at the Lemon Drop. Yeah, so Lemon Drop Festival was so fire, y'all. I'm going to out-girl-dorley.

I've seen so much stuff about it, too. It looked like I got to get to him. I'm my out. Oh, I said it wrong. Outgirl, Dorley. Outdoors, girl. Outdoorsy girl. Me.

Me, my, blank, my eyes. Outdoor girly. I love festivals. verbally. I'm dyslexic ADHD and I have slight autism. All self-diagnosed. A little bit. I know I'm on the spectrum.

Okay, but back to the Lim and Drop Festival. It was absolutely amazing. Seeing like all the city come out be together, everything ran smooth. Like they really put their best foot forward with throwing this event. So many people came out. The food was fires. The drinks was fire. It was two performances, Rocco and Vito.

It was just a vibe. Like summertime vibe. Oh, I don't know Rocco was going to be. there? Yes, it was so good. Like we were just out there just vibe and just drinking, just having a good time. And it's like now I felt like that was so good for the city because you know how it's Black Expo weekend. And we all complain about Black Expo not being as lit as it used to be. We complain about the old performers. So to have Rocco and Vito there and just having an amazing time that DJs with fire, like I can't wait till next year. Yeah. Yeah. I'm glad that they did it on Expo

weekend too. Is it going to be like that every year? I don't know. But I'm, excited to see what they do going forward because it's only going, it's only been getting better. So shout out to them for throwing that. Next week, I am going to be bartending with Belair. They booked Barbie Mobile Bar. Yeah. Booked and Busy, howls.

Yeah, so the Bellies and Bullshit block party, Saturday, July the 25th, I will be there bartending for Bellair. So make sure y'all stop and come see me there. But yeah, I had an amazing night. everybody was looking for y'all at the lemon drop festival um the fever one so pulled up on the girls they were looking for y'all oh yeah so where the fuck you didn't know that girl i'm partied out yeah i don't know i am i think i'm the homebody of the crew love that i'm not i'm not gonna claim being a homebody on some delusional shit and be like i never go out like i know i'm not

that. But if I can sit in the house, I do enjoy a night in the house, a weekend in the house. And I had to wake up early and go, my kids had a game at 8.30 a.m. So I knew I wasn't going outside. I mean, and we was out on Thursday. Well, we did our dinner on Thursday. And then we went out. And I don't know. That should just, people was texting me all weekend. Like, you coming out, you coming out? I'm like, no. I literally fell off in the club last night. That was so random, I wasn't dressed. I didn't have on heels or nothing. He was by yourself?

Did you talk out with Barbie? Or like, did you? I met. So, you know, because Barbie was in a group chat because she was giving us a playbby play of her night. Like, where are you bitch is at? Come find me, please. Finally, I'm like, okay, well, where are you at?

And then she was like saying she was going somewhere. I'm like, bitch, Webby's here. We need to go there. She was like, you know what? You're right. Let's go. I'll meet you. Why would y'all text privately outside the chat?

I caught her. Oh, you caught her. And Trump, you don't respond. to shit. I didn't respond. You, you texting me and said that that man gave you $100 to give me his number. He's going to give me some more money, so text him back. Text him.

I don't want to text him. He's fucking annoying. Is he? Yes, he's annoying. Did he not give annoying when you saw him? Yeah, he's always been annoying. He, like, almost ran me over in the parking lot trying to like. Anoint, like, overbearing, bro.

And that's a older than night was that. And that was an older neighbor. That was an older. He's not even that much older, though. He's not. How is he? I don't know. He's not that old.

I don't know either. When I say Webby was so fat, though, like, okay, so these bitches left me. And I'm like, I don't know where the fuck they did this. Who is these bitches? Barbie and P. They like, I don't know where they went. I was talking. No, y'all didn't intentionally leave me, but somebody was, like, talking to me. And I'm just like, you didn't make me lose my bitches.

So now, and it's so fat. So, boom. So I see, like, my friends do on the stage. So I'm like, you know what? I don't have my glasses on. I don't see anybody for her. I don't see my girls. So I'm like, I'm about to go up here on the stage, right?

So I'm just on the stage. And then Barbie couldn't even get to me. It was so fat or whatever, right? It was so fucking fat. Girl, I'm just on the stage. I hear them playing the Webby songs or whatever. Finally, we get off the stage. We go get in the section or whatever.

And I'm looking at the stage and I'm like, damn, that's Webby. And then I asked Barbie. I'm like, so he was on the stage the whole time. It's Wendy. I'm on the stage. I didn't even realize he was up there. Maybe like two people in front of Webby then Kiki.

Blind as hell. But I literally thought that they were just playing the Webby songs because it was a Webby event. Yeah. Like I'm thinking he did a walkthrough and they just playing all his shit. No, he was performing. Girl, oh my gosh, stay woke. Stay woke.

The city literally popped their shit for Black Expo weekend. So Webby was at All-Star. It was lit. He played some hits. I had a good time there. It just was overly fat. I couldn't breathe about. I bet.

Then I went back to try to find her And she's like looking down on me from the stage Like I was gonna put a fucking peasant I'm like I'm not even about to push up there I've been like Get up here It was too much I was just trying to breathe

And remember Remember last time when we was in the club Trying to get on the stage That Hoochie Mama Oh my gosh You remember that pissed me off so bad Remember that dude You were trying to get up on stage

One of y'all was trying to get up on the stage And he down there was like Pushing y'all to get on the stage So he could get up there and twerk his ass Doing too much Which party was this? This was Bees'all's a birthday party

You remember? Oh yeah, I remember I remember the bad And I was like Y'all were, I actually have a video that encounter Y'all are funny as fuck

Because he pissed me off so bad He was like I got cloud on social media too I'm like Who gives a fuck about cloud on social media? Why? And what do you care about

cloud on social media? You are a man You are a boy, Damon Barbie was like Let him be a bad bitch Just let him be a bad bitch He wanted to get up and twerk his Warrack his eyes

He looked at you He squeezed his tiny ass up into this right next to me and I said, I'm moving and I got off this day. They were starting shit that. Boy, watch you all. The girls were beefy that night.

The gals. Gross. Quiet on the creek, y'all. It's okay that we weren't all together this weekend because next weekend is WMBA All-Star in Chicago. And it is 520 somewhere in Chicago.

We outside. We outside. We're definitely. So are you going on Friday? though. And then coming back. I'm going to make it happen. I'm going to make it happen.

I'm going to come down there Friday, turn up Friday, and then get right back for the bullshit and belly's in bullshit. Okay, cool. Yeah. Yeah. So y'all stay down there and enjoy y'allself for me. Like to be young and turn again. Like, oh my God.

I wish I could bounce around like I used to because the old me would have been there Friday, came back Saturday, hit the road. Saturday came back. Been near Sunday. Like, unnecessary shit. Like, calm down. It's okay. It's okay to breathe a little bit, but

y'all ain't get no food at All-Stars last night. Girl, how you was going to eat chicken wings like this? A food wasn't going to get head. I mean, I'm sure their kitchen was crashed because it was like so many people there. It was no bullshit. I'm just asking you know, Kiki, last time we was at all-stars. She over there.

I wasn't covering up a thing. I don't give a fuck. She was smashed. I had to eat before I drink. Jeff was in this section looking at her like, damn, little lady. Like. So you ain't busted down no,

10 piece of lemon pepper in the club. Yeah, I will. I don't give us. I'll be smashed. I mean, dancing with my chicken wing like I'm outside at a barbecue. You know what? But we didn't eat with her. That's why we was probably so drunk that night.

Y'all was drunker than me that night. That never happened. I know I was drunk. And then we got our bottle so late, we had to. Oh, yeah, we went crazy. We had to gope it down. Shout out to Swift. Shout out to Swift.

Shout out to that late bottle. Shout out to NAP, baby. The city is overly turned. I'm loving it. I am loving it. But speaking of Black Expo, Black people activities, what's your favorite black catchphrase? Hmm. What your grannies used to say? My granny, I actually have a funny story. My granny one time she was, because my parents have like hilly kids, right? And so we used to come and stay the summers like for three months, the whole summer when we was kids and stay with our granny. How it should be? The hell.

Right. Get these kids. Like, you baby boomers. Don't get, don't, don't get this good starting. Yeah, don't. Okay. I'm not even going to get started on you baby boomers and how y'all are terrible grandparents, but. Like you. But no, I remember we were like, we were like, what, nine when our little sister was born, this number six or whatever.

They pulled up, surprised us all. They came early to pick us up. They didn't even pick us up. That's how good they had it. They didn't even pick us up. They just pulled up to. surprise us with the baby. They had just had our little sister, our little cancer baby or whatever. Oh, Miko. So they cut out and my granny was like, I know they did not have another kid or whatever.

And she's just talking to herself. Anyway, she said, they need another kid. Like, I need a hole in a head. And I was like, what do you mean, grandma? She was like, do I need another hole in the head? No, she said, do I need a hole in the head? I said, no. She said, all right, then. I'm just like, I never knew what that meant until you just broke it down like that okay so you get it now like they don't need no another kid and then they still

and then my mom still had two more after that like that girl wait so y'all didn't know she was pregnant and stuff like no we never knew because y'all was with the granny for three months

no we nobody ever knew when she was pregnant she's a heavy weight and she carry it good like in her back you would look at her and not know she's fucking pregnant When you did that, that is her mind.

That is so funny. Like, don't she look? Oh, my God. What? She did she just carry this. She took a moan. But I'm just imagining a Samoa man when they be doing that little, y'all traditional dancing stuff. So I didn't matter her popping up, like, oh, it's a baby.

Yo! Did they do the dance with the baby or just like here? Come on. Just weddings. I don't know. I'm not that cultured. I wish I was. Just weddings.

You know what I say, though? That's like a black thing. I think it's a new black thing. But I love saying, I love that for you. It's a black girly theme. My favorite thing is like, Kiki my ass. Because ain't shit funny. Or anything in my ass.

Like, I swear. Or your ass. Like, when you're about to, when you get in trouble, like, they'll be like, I don't know. They'll put your ass on the end of something. Yeah. Put your ass on the end of something. Yo ass. Oh.

That's your. Um, okay, telling your ass or, I don't know, PlayStation your ass type shit. I feel like the new thing is playing in your ass. Is that new? You didn't take the chicken out the freezer because you only here playing in your ass.

Niggas been doing that for centuries. Oh, just kidding. Since like Caesar's time. Did you wipe your ass? Is that your ass? Kiki, surprise. Wait, what are they? Did you wash your ball?

Wait, she was ready. What's the phrase? Say it. Say it disappointed. Say it disappointed. Did you wash your balls, nigga? Okay. Say it, say it, say it, say it happy.

Did you wash your balls? Say it sad. Did you wash your balls? What in the fuck? Please wash your balls. It's too hot outside. It is good all the time. That's a black catch phrase.

I feel like. White people don't. Say that. Or when you, telling a story that'd be like, mind you. Mind you.

Mind you. We are overdue to mind you. Or like, when you're on the road and they be like, that's why your shit fucked up now. No,

speaking of fucked up cars on the road, my road rage is absolutely terrible. That's why you ain't got no time inbuilt, bitch. Yeah,

that's what's going on. Like, my road right around with that motherfucking buffer. About to fly. Fucking like that cussing people out. I'm gonna be like, that's why your bumper falling off, bitch. And I'd be like so, bitch, fuck you.

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Listen to you're the problem with Yamanika on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. You. Because my role rage is so bad, even if I'm in the wrong, I'm yelling at you. You ain't she. I don't care. When I'm wrong, I'd be like, sorry. I swear I will say sorry. I'll say sorry like that.

Yes, I'll be like, no. I blow my horn back. Like, fuck you. I know I was supposed to be doing it. But damn, calm down. You don't got to do it. So why are you mad at me? People fuck up.

Accountability. Where is DJ? I have no accountability. Clearly. And I've been getting into it with old white men on the road. Since I got a job and got to be out here in the world all early and stuff, I've been getting into it with old white men on the streets. And I cussed they old white ass out.

Old young. I mean, they probably deserve it. Man, one time I got into it with a big bitch on the road, right? Oh, shit. She driving. I don't know why. Tusha to your big bitch story, right? She must have been.

She was turning. and left I'm about to turn right we at the light she, I don't know if she like cut me I don't know what the fuck happened but my window's down her windows down and I'm like bitch next thing I know she said bitch fuck you I said bitch fuck you fat bitch

bro next thing I know this bitch pops a Yui and turns the fuck around she gets behind me and she said now what did you say bitch I said scurred I don't know smoke with you bitch I was just playing biggie no it's dangerous

So road rage is dangerous because you're really big out your body. I do not. I don't even play like that anymore. I don't play like that. Especially if I got my kids in a car. And motherfuckers will shoot you in the motherfucker and shoot you. They will unalive you and you're like you need a hole in the head. I don't know.

Whenever I feel anything like fishy, I'll clutch. I don't. Is that too much? But I think everybody needs to calm down on the roads. Just calm down. Take a deep breath. Coming from a person who yells at people. And we used to be good.

We used to be good at throwing stuff at people's course. Remember that at the time we was on our way home from IU? And we was like, somebody like cut us off or was, because white people like over honk they horn. Like, why do you honk your horn? And now they'll be the main ones to cut your dick. I'm not much of a horn honker. Running a stop sign. The Jeep didn't have a horn, y'all.

My Jeep did not have a horn. Good. Worst 10 years of my life. I used to be so shitty. So now that I got a horn. I hate a overly honking-ass bitch. I'm going to honking so you can't hear me no more. Why are you honking like that?

We was on the way home from Bloomington and this man was like honking his horn. We start throwing coins out the cup holder. We start throwing water bottles off type of shit at his shit. What the fuck this nigga going to flash a badge at us? Take y'all to fly it. Fuck it, jeez. And we was like, oh. He was off, dude.

He was doing something he wasn't supposed to do anyways. No, for real. Speaking of a bash, we need to post that video when we was downtown hanging out the window, hanging out the roof with Mel. Oh my gosh. And the police slid on us. And they let us, yeah, they let us have that one. I would have felt so bad having to give Mike a, Mike, Mike, Mark, Mike, Mike, Mike, my deal, pod checks to pay for this ticket.

Because he was like, no seat bill, no seatbelt, reckless driving. I can give you six different tickets. I was like, we are so sorry. We are all hanging out of a window in Malk's car. And one of us was out the roof. Yeah. I was not respond to this. He was very calm.

He was. He was, he was calm. Yeah. Because we were like, we were so, we were overly talking to the police officer. We were so sorry. So we just slid back in, put our seatbelt on. We literally had the video. He said, you're just letting them hang out your window like this.

I could give you one ticket, two ticket, three tickets. Like, like, reckless driving. I was like, please don't. We're so sorry. We were just trying to have fun. I mean, it's literally a fat ass hanging out of every window. And the roof. And the roof.

We were clown. I was out of the roof. Well, how many? It was five fat asses in the court. Five fat asses. Five. Four. Oh, okay.

It was five. You're right. It was. Allegedly. Good time. On G. Oh, you're trying to be funny. I didn't say.

No, no, no, no. Not talking about you. No. He was looking over here like he was looking earlier. He's just. He's talking about your. responding to the story, Kiki. Oh, I thought you were trying to say my

real. You know your ass is fat. Y'all, y'all, y'all know I get conscious about this. Why are you acting so sensitive? Not right now. You were mean when I first came in. You know what you did? Today?

Yes. You know what you thought? He missed judged. Oh, yeah. Oh. That was me. He was trying to. He was trying to.

be a jerk head. Yeah, he's trying to be funny. I would be just humbling you, that's all. But you, you did that for me. I respect it. Why do you want, why would you want to humble us? We're your friends. Everybody needs a little humble pie.

Nah. I need a little humble pocket. We don't do you like that. Oh, wait. No, no. Hold on. I wasn't here. I wasn't in on it.

That was these bitches. David Ruffing. Yeah. What happened, Mike? Y'all definitely tried to that one day. Oh, my God. Did you know what he's talking about? Were we trying to humble you or?

Oh, my goodness. I just got a haircut. What? What? Or was we speaking facts? I mean, y'all. Did you switch barbers?

What had happened? No, because why did your hair look at? It's a terrible. Mike. It's the same hair right now. Y'all, I can't even see. So I can't even laugh with, with they ass. I was not in on that.

He came in while we were recording. I looked up. I was like, I looked away, he stopped, kept trying to do the show. As soon as the show ended, Trump said, boy,

that my fucking haircut and got to appealing him. And we were like crying tears. Crying tears. What did you say he looked like? First day in school, he looked like a youth preacher or something. And it was so funny.

And Mike was just standing in. I swear y'all like the temperature. after the perm. You just looked at so old. I just didn't know what. I called me a barbershop. They combed my hair out. So it was like a Norbert fro straight up.

You don't need it. Keep the little curl. Yeah. Oh, that makes sense. It was just straight, just a straight peaked-out fro. Fuck it ugly. We was over there looking like, did you get a different haircut? It was so.

Y'all, when I say there's no. I know. You can tell like I can see the steam roller for your head. He wanted to call us. There's no way to put into words. We should have been recording it. was being like it was so hilarious and I can't even roast. Yeah, I almost ended y'all show that day.

Look, there he go. He always wanted to do that. He goes low. This is, you see, y'all see? He go to hell, y'all. Every time I'm talking about some humble pie. But yeah. Do y'all Barbara got a, like a full-time job work?

Or is that his main? You needed to juice it and sponge it. It was just the fact that it was. He needed some leaving conditioner or something. It was so bad, Mike. And then you just didn't in a, door just look ugly as hell. It was so.

Like, get the fuck out of here, Tito. All right. Worse from the block. Y'all know, we still had then came up with our own lingo for overly explicit things, but I've seen this on X. It said, we need a word that's more

romantic than fucking, but less corny than making love, and we need it now. We have that. We always say crack. That is, don't say you cracking me. It sounds a little about murk and knocking the boots. romantic than fucking.

Okay. More romantic. But less corny than making love. I got nothing. Mating. No, I don't want to have your kids. That is so scientific.

What about? You know, I'm a logical bitch. What about? Fornicating. Oh, no, that's cheating. Is it cheating? Fornicating. What was they say,

getting the skins or something? Screwing, coupling, nooky. Bumping. Bunkin panky panky The nasty Shagging, shagging Shagging

Rumpy pumpy Fregin I know what you're Procreation no Conno Cornel What is corneo? What hole is that?

Carnal? Oh Nuky I don't see you with her Is it a hole? No What does that mean, Mike Or a

Pinnah Triton What? Nuckie is cute If you Cuddy We be saying Cuddy. But like, I want to make love with him, but I want to fuck him too. Honestly, I haven't come up with the word.

Intimacy. I'd be saying fucking. Just fuck me. That's very sad. I use Cuddy a lot. I use Cracking or Cracked. I'd be like, sometimes. That's so childish.

It's childish, but it's cute. They think it's cute. You're trying to hump? Or I swear I'd be like, you're trying to do it or you want me suck? That sounds childish, but it kind of, I don't know. Niggas like that. Bring that dick here, boy. That's cute.

I'm switching up now. I switch it up, however, I say those too. Well, I used to have a little code. I would text and I would say read books. Read books? My little geeky anime guys, come on, let's read books. And we would have nasty hot sex. Flipping every page.

Who, who, who, who, who, flipping me, baby. You know, corny men be having the... They be having good dick? Oh, long. Don't pose, baby. I'm just watching it. I don't know about corny man, but I know broke men do. Yeah, we don't want to...

I'm not interested. But, um, yeah, no, me neither shit. Also, it's not worth it. I am challenging. I'm going through some broke-ass shit right now. My tenant didn't pay rent this month. On my birthday month, so did she say for it? Yeah, he got your messed up.

Your tenant knows that it's your birthday month? I'm pretty sure he's cool with my baby daddy. Oh, damn, you just called him all the way out. Okay. Pay your rent, fuck, nigga. Right. But we come find you. Like, don't play with her.

She just, what? And he's doing a bitch, don't he? And he helps your nigga. A wife. She needs to hold him like a count. They're married. She needs to hold him like town of old. A two-income household.

What do we do? We know what I'm saying. Our rent and mortgages by ourselves. Yo, you mean y'all have to pay two wrists this month. Nobody say a thing to me. At this point, go sell some dick. Like, but this is what I'm saying, though, and this is why they be, when I say I'm traumatized by broke niggas, it's just like, bitch, do you not know that

I'm a single mom ho? Like, I literally had to pay for you to live. Like, to the point where I got to kick you out and guess what, when I kick you out, you still got to live off me for a whole month. Wow. That's some lame-ass shit to me. No, I had to give him a 10-day eviction notice. So, like, then he can get a, but by then it's going to be the end of the month.

You mean you bust your wrist and your tenant ain't even pay their rent? Oh, wow. Big boss, bitch. I do not come in your size. Amen, amen, amen. Praise more saints. Okay, saints. But, yeah, no, thank you for that, guys.

Because I literally keep telling myself, like, I'm just be positive. Like, it's cool. Like, everything happens for a reason. But also, I will say this, though. Rainbow Storm. and then the rainbow. So it's fine. You're just getting all the bullshit out the way.

That's how I view shit like this. When you go through like bullshit, it's like, okay, cool. I'm just getting the bullshit out the way and then the rainbow is going to come. But y'all, literally when I say I have to send him an eviction notice every month. And it's just like, why the fuck do I got to sit here

and threaten to evict a grown-ass man every fucking month? This is so weird. That's why I'm like broke, niggas. It's like, y'all don't care. Y'all have no, like, moral compass. Like, bitch, this falls on. I'm definitely traumatized. And I feel like, I don't know, it just makes it even harder when I'm going to just shut up.

I'm going to stop right there. You good, landlord, Key? No, sometimes. I don't. And I'm trying to cook. Can we cook? We can cook. Okay.

Why, you got some policies and procedures for my bitch? No. No. Don't sell it. I told you, let me rent it out. I'm trying to, I'm literally, oh my God, I'm literally trying to, I've been trying to turn it into something else before he ever even got there. You can do it, do it, yes.

Have a state thing. Yeah, but I just kind of got comfortable and, you know, that's like a time frame. We'll put our heads together. Sometimes you win and sometimes you learn. Let's cook. Do something. Let's cook, Chef Key. I'll be your suit chef. This guy, this is a really ruined my fucking birthday month.

Like, a person planned. He didn't. He didn't, because I had a great birthday. Like, if nothing else, I don't know. We haven't even addressed that. Oh, yeah, July was crazy. Yeah, Poppian she key. July was crazy, guys.

And also, we're going to end it off with a new house. Yes. Honestly, y'all, I hate this. Okay, Trubb, you kept telling me when I got a new car. You was like, bitch, it's okay. You got a new car. That's normal. You're not irresponsible because you got a new car.

I literally had to get a new car. Because my other car, it didn't break down. but I can hear it and I can tell that and the dealership quoted me $7,000 to get it fixed. Bro, we got some mechanics in the hood. Yeah, period. So now I'm be two car shoddy. Well, I am too car shoddy, but.

Period. Can you pop your shit? Yeah. But yeah. Pop it, ho. But yeah, so, yeah, he really pissed me off. No, nigga. No sponsor.

My own. Oh, speaking to no sponsor. All right, this or that. Would y'all rather be in a relationship or single? Relationship. relationship if it's beneficial right if the niggas doing it right relationship for sure because i'm gonna say relationship just because i'm not gonna choose at this stage and age i'm not choosing to be in a relationship unless it makes sense unless i'm happy like i would rather stay single than to be

in an unhappy relationship for sure but like i said if he's doing it right because what girl really we really just want to be girls. Who wants to go at life alone? Like, Hey, I'm Ruby Carr, the host of the podcast, OnCore. Check out our brand new episodes featuring music from the show that everyone is reheating as we speak. Heated rivalry. Join me as I go behind the songs that brought Shane and Elia together. I'll tell you the stories of Fice, My Moon, My Man, Wolf Parades, I'll Believe in Anything, and tattoos all the things she said, and how they all became a part of this global phenomenon. Stream Encore on IHeart radio, crave, or wherever you get your podcasts.

What's up, fam? I'm sports journalist, Ari Chambers. Hey, what's up, y'all? It's your girl, Sam J. And we're the host of everyone watches women's sports, a new podcast from Together and I Heart Women's Sports. Because let's be real. Women's sports is giving us way too much to talk about these days. So Kelsey Finler, she became the first female solo roer to go from California to Hawaii. My first thought is, like, what's up with the snacks? Like, what are we eating? The highlights. the rivalries, the breakout stars, the moments that take over your entire timeline.

And the conversations that start during the game and somehow keep going all week. Every week, we're breaking down the biggest stories across women's sports. Naomi Osaka showing out, she beat. Sabalinka. Shout out to you, Naomi. You get the palm, Naomi. You get the palm for that. Because we're not just interested in what happened.

We're interested in why everyone's talking about it. Because everyone watches women's sports. Listen to everyone watches women's sports. On the IHeart Radio app. Apple Podcast. or wherever you get your podcast. Hey, Portlandia fans. Carrie Brownstein and Fred Armisen here.

You know us, or rather you know them. Tony and Candice, Nina and Lance, Spike, and yes, The Chicken. We've played a lot of iconic characters over the years, but today we're showing up as ourselves to tell you about Podlandia, AEO, rewatch, our brand new podcast. Each week, we'll revisit an episode of Portlandia from the very beginning, breaking down the sketches, exploring the backstories

of our most iconic characters, revisiting the Portland locations you know and love, and opening up about our creative process. How did any of this get made? Why do we think that was a good idea? We're ready to talk about it. And we'll also be joined by the people who helped bring it all to life. Guest stars, collaborators, and friends,

including director Jonathan Chrysler, the mayor himself, Kyle McLaughlin, legendary musician Amy Mann, and many more. Kyle is going for it here. You fully improvised, not just words, but a song, a melody. Well, I thought he was going to write. I thought you were all going to write a song. I remember you thinking that.

Listen to Podlandia. Ayo, rewatch on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. This is Chelsea Handler from Dear Chelsea. Every week, the news gets worse. The world gets crazier. And Yamanika is here to tell whoever's responsible, you're the problem. If you come over here to play games, I'm a check you. Okay?

If you do some in the news that don't sound good, I'm a plumbin. You join Yamanika Saunders as she breaks down the week's most problematic stories on her new podcast. You're the problem with Yamanika. Do you know I just found out who Sidney Sweeney was? New episodes weekly every Wednesday is part of my new network, the Dear Chelsea Network. If he got a bunch of women, then I should have a bunch of men. Do better or do less so I don't have to do so much. So join Yamanika each episode as she answers one question.

Who's the problem? I'm Yamanika. Listen to You're the problem with Yamanika on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. Bitch, I'm going through all this shit. The last time a motherfucker played with me on rent, I had a nigga and he just paid it, you know? And it's just like, how is that ass backwards? Because your man is saying someone, another man's rent. No, that mortgage.

No, no, no, no. It wasn't a man. It wasn't a man. Oh, it was your rent. No, it was a girl who was living there You always had terrible tenants? Your man is paying another tenant rent. No, they got the fuck out.

He gave her the money. He covered the mortgage. That she was missing. He covered the mortgage. On my own. Also, it was Christmas time. And he bought my kids Christmas. Like, I just miss being somebody's baby.

I just miss being like. Am I your baby? I wish I said, Daddy, am I your baby? I want to be somebody. I want to be somebody's. I don't want to be my own responsibility. I can be my own responsibility.

Clearly. But I don't want to. You got it. You got it. You trust me. I've been doing this shit a long time. And I don't want to. Okay.

That's what I'm saying. But you can. Girl, push it, push it. Even emotionally, though. I want to go home and cry to my nigger and be like, can you believe this nigga play with me? And that's the thing about being single. Like, I've been vented to my sisters.

I didn't be like, do y'all know everybody has somebody. Do you know how it feels to go home after a long-ass, 13-hour shift? Nobody loves me. You don't got nobody to talk to about, Karen, have you fucked up? That's my favorite thing to say.

Like, I'd be like, her wig is so fucked up and she got a man. Like, somebody loves her. Or she's slow as hell and she got a man. Why can't I find love? Like, what is it? Because a lot of these motherfuckers is unhappy. Cool.

Granted. And I don't want to be unhappily. happy. And that's the thing. We're not about to be in a relationship until we know that we're going to be happy. Yeah, because I'm going to go hard. I'm going to do all the chores. I'm do all the things. I'm going to suck out of cock. I'm going to do everything.

Well, shit. I hope he ain't sucking cock. Oh, really? I thought I was being professional. On YouTube it's the worst word to use. Cock. What? Cut it. Cut it. Rooster.

Stop saying that. Rooster. Choke is rooster. What's a fucking plant, y'all. Mike. What? Swan said. Swanson.

No? That's like literally like old as fuck. You said how old is it? Speaking of old wording, listen. My bad. Niggas have been in my inbox sounded like fucking Shakespeare. Like Spears, whatever how you pronounce the shit. This man was like,

Oh, Barbies. Niggas have been in my inbox talk about the right shit. I know that's right queen. Bro, they be asking for my cash app, but I'm scared to give it to him. I'm not saying my cash app. I'm not sending my apple pay. The ones that ask for the Apple Pay, you can't have it. Because your Apple Pay is your phone number.

Yeah. But no, this dude was like, good afternoon, beautiful queen. Would you be capable of courting? And I was like, boy, shut the fuck up talking to me like this. Like, why are you, just talk. Why are you doing all that? That irritated you? Am I capable?

No, he said, do I have the capacity to court? I don't have the capacity to court. I don't have the capacity to listen to this shit. Why the fuck? I don't court you. Why would he say it like that? That's what I'm saying. Bro, don't piss me off.

Do I have the capacity? I don't. I'm insane in the motherfucking membrane. I don't have the patience for this weird shit. Do y'all hate good morning texts? Yes. Y'all do? Yes.

So when you're dealing with somebody, you don't, I text good morning every morning. Nigger, call me. You want him to call you in the morning? Yes. Please don't call me in the morning. Please call me. I honestly, I despise texting. Like, I don't despise it.

However, I'm a better caller. Because honestly, I'm super horrible at it. I'll see your text and it won't even register in my mind for real. No, yeah, I'm bad at texting. That I just read your shit. Or I'll swear that, oh, I'm about to respond to it as soon as I'm done scrolling. Like, and I won't. So, like, and I just don't.

It's too much of a paper trail. You're not about to have me and my feelings and your motherfucking. text messages. I'm sorry. So just call me. I'm gonna tell that man to call you so I can give me the rest of the money. I love you. What? I'm gonna tell that man to call you so he can give me the rest of the money. Where are you at? Don't tell him. No, don't tell that man to call me the fuck. What's wrong? What's wrong with him? She said he was calling me and annoying. He's, he's, he's, well, I'll tell you what, Mama, you fuck with him in them in.

What did she say? What did she say? Well, you, what movie is that? I'm waiting to exhale. Don't do that because you know he's a good man, Savannah. He said, well, I'll tell you what. Mama, do you sleep with him then? Y'all are so whooping-h. Like the hell. But speaking of day-ins and DMs and text.

He gave you the money. You text his ass. I can't. Uh-uh. I can't. He gave her 100. He gave Barbie $100 to give me his number. And look at me, I said, I said he should have gave you $200 to give me some money.

I told him, I said, because he had all his money. I'm the one part of that. He had all his money out like, man, tell Trop, listen, it's motion over here. She can get whatever. And 100 is not even that much. Kiki, remember that time that man gave me 500 to, to give you his number and put in a good word? And honestly, I was offended.

I'm like, where's mine? Where's my money? Right. Where's mine? But I ain't going to lie. He paid my rent a few times. I text, uh, Trop, I said, text him back and tell him to send your money. So you texting him back.

Then I get to get to get my money. It was a easy deal. I'm about to be a good. You said he got you some on the back end? Yeah. Sorry. You're not going to get it. I'm about to make a text app and be like, hey, babe, this is trope.

Listen, whoever you is, I'm the one you need to be trying to pay because I'm the one who's really, I got, listen, I got the end-spide in real. You could. Now, I'm the one. She got mind-control over D-Bow. I do got mind-control over D-Boh. No. It's okay. You about to get a text on.

worry. I'm about to download a fake number right now. I'm about to say, be sneaking pictures of Trot, her feed and shit. Yeah, just working, babe. 13 hour shifts, so tired. Miss you. My kids is fucking up my couch. I need a new couch.

Send that cash. I'm about to catfish. It's a bonless couch. It's only $700. I'm about to catfish in B. Trop. He's going to be so shitty when I pull up. And it's a fat-ass Kelly Price. I'm all for the bitch is getting an acoy. Yeah. Quiet on the cream.

Wait, what did you say? You said something, Barb. What? What did you say? I don't know. What was the question? No, it wasn't a question. It was something else.

I know you're one. When we first started talking about this subject, but I don't remember. Fuck it. Fuck it. But speaking of creepy men in DMs. You should have made words from the block quiet on a creep. I was going. Did y'all see the real?

Yes. That was so cute. I was going to, but I'm kind of grossed out. Because why? Quiet on the creek. I wanted it to be the words on the block. But it's Saucy Santana's song. He was like, and when I was a little girl,

and we used to go fishing, you had to be real, real, real quiet on the creek. And the motion that he's dung. I, in the visual. The visuals. What is it about DL men? They said that it's about DL men as well as like being somebody's like side chick or side dude. Like be real quiet. on the creek. That makes so much

sense. Yeah, so. But that's what he looked like when he do it. And it's just the emotion and being I'm just imagining, saucy. I didn't want to talk about it. Bark. All right. You acting like Henny. No, love who you love. But it's the DL thing.

It's the DL thing. And like to promote it in the song. I mean, but was he? Is that what it is? What's this? What is all this? bouncing on the creek. And you know, fish is like a term for like men that... Yeah. They say if we knew how many men, black men were D.O.

We would be floored. Really? You too loud on the creek. I think I am. Quite on the creek. That's just because... And it's the thing. Like, it be them overly freaky men.

I just don't want no overly... I want a regular freak. Like, just be a regular freak. Them overly freaky men? What's overly freaky? I'm an overly horny. Overly, yes. Overly lustful.

What's overly freaky, though? Want to fucking marry ho. Oh, Lord. Is that? Is that freaky? Oh, my God. Barbie, that's definitely freaky. No nigga dick should be in your ear.

I'm really just talking about. That's my belly button, baby. I know. I don't think nothing's wrong. He wanted to put it in my ear. I know you knew. I knew. I knew you had a nigger.

a dick in your ear. No. You know what? That's a y'all girl called me DL, so maybe that's why. You don't think of a strap in the ears. Not a strap.

Whoa, whoa. That's too far. Pink flag. Pink flag. What? Flag on the flag. You got it. Ow.

All right, bitch. Let me find out you got a strapped in the ear. Strap in the ear is crazy. My ear is little. Why? I don't know. The ear? Maybe they, if they want to rub it

on the back there. Okay. I don't know. I would let people do. If we in a relationship shit. You can do whatever you want to do to me. I'm just going to. Yep.

Yeah, but if so y'all suck a niggottish, then I'm looking at you funny. Sucking toe a man's, I was suck a woman's toe. Sucking a man's, I would kiss a man's feet. Shut. Bitch, you were irritated. Bitch, you were aggravated. Wait, no. I'm going to get back to this.

Wait, before y'all got here, Mike was trying to get the tape off of this, and he's going to say, I'm not trying. Where did Mike come from? Listen. Listen, what he's saying? This guy breaking you hands today. Quiet on the creek, Mike. Cried on the creek.

Mike, where's your thing? Oh, man, listen. That's what you gave. Let him explain it. Because you decided to record. Because he's so loud on the creek. Chill out. You're in the chair.

It was some tape on the wall. I'm like, I'm not going to bust it open over the couch. Pause. I said, I'm not about to. do that. Why did you... I'm like, I'm not doing that. But this is the thing, as a man... All I said was, I'm not doing it.

As a man to get it, you just had to bend. Now, busting it open... This is busting it open. What are you going to do this to get the tape? Me said, I'm not going to do something. It's not crazy. I'm busy. I'm bursting.

I don't want to be like my... It's busting it open. You, talking about, I don't... Quiet on the creek. I missed it. That was crazy. I ain't trying to bust it open. So, I'm not fin to bust it open.

Man, he's lucky we were in here. Because what? I ain't never seen. And a man to bust it open has to be like. Yo. What do we go? Wide on the creek. Face your ass.

All force. Face down. As up. I like them. That's the way. Oh, y'all. Oh, what the hell's up you singing? Here she go.

That's the way. Baby, like, oh, that's like 2000. Bitch, you started in 2000? No, I'm thinking. You're a 90s, baby. Yeah. Okay. Late mid-90s?

No. But. This bitch said mid-90s. Oh, she's in her bag today. Early 90s. I was born in 94. Early. It's before 95.

So, whatever. Listen, though. I was trying to tell y'all something. Y'all wasn't listening to me. I know. I don't know. Y'all know I got ADHD real, real, real bad. Yeah, I do too.

I ain't going to lie. I'll be having, like, 50 tabs opening my head. Oh. Speaking of, you said pause, tell me you know you get an old win. It just reminded me, my son says pause now. Mm.

Like him and my nieces, her daughters, where, like, debating, like, they had all these squishies, right? And her kid was like, you can have this one. And he's like, no, I don't want that. I don't want that one. I want this one. And she's like, but it's hard.

He said, but I like heart. I like the hard ones. Pause. I'm like, oh, my God. Definitely a pause moment. Definitely a pause moment. How do he know a pause moment? That's what I want to know.

But the hard squishies are the better ones, though, if we're like the hard needos. The hard need those. Yeah. It's like, I swear I could squeeze on my motherfuckers. Just on some board shies. It's a needo. But, yeah, this nigger said pause. I'm like, whoa.

Wait, I got to stop watching Club 520 at home because my bones crack constantly. Your bones are always cracking. Yes. I think I'm going to have arthritis. Our mama has that. Yesterday, I could tell it was going to rain. All right, bitch. All right, bitch.

You can feel it in your body. You get old. I could feel it in my bones. Girl, yes. I'm over there. I'm in the driver's scene. I'm like, it's going to rain. I want to do white people's things say that.

Or is that just like some old black people's stuff? Like, yeah, I can feel it's about to rain. No, if you like broke a bone or got like a screwing your knee or something, you can feel it. I ain't never broke. Have you ever broke a bone? No, I don't do nothing to. So they say if you never broke a bone. If you never broke a bone, it's because you're chosen.

No. I am chosen. I am a favorite. Bless me. I'm absolutely chosen. You are, you're going to go through more emotional pain than physical pain. I believe it. Well, what the blood, honey?

Listen, I don't been dragged through the wringer. Through the wringer and back through the wringer. I haven't been dragged through the wringer emotionally and physically. You know what's crazy? Have you ever broke a bone? Yes. What bone? Bitch.

Oh, right. Yeah. Anyway. Damn, you made me lose. I'm trying to thaw. It was a traumatic experience. That's, yeah, it was, it was, who was there for you, though? My sisters.

These bitches was bringing me care packages and roses and all kind of shit. Just like how my sisters were there for me this birthday. Our sisters really did they shit. Yeah, they did. Let me just say this too. I felt so love this birthday. I love that for y'all. Literally, like, if nothing else, overly loved, overly shy of love.

I don't even have a nigger. My sisters bought me gifts. And they bought me flowers. Y'all flowers were so beautiful. Like, who sisters does that? Just so my sister can have some flowers on her birthday? Yeah. That wasn't, I don't know.

Them bitches almost made me cry for real. They ain't buy my flowers, but I did. And the reason why they bought me flowers, y'all, is because my twin had a nigger bought my twin some flowers. Aw, that's so sweet. And it was like, we can't have Kiki, not have no flowers. Yeah, that's so sweet. Give a fuck about not having no flowers.

I know I'm not talking to nobody. You needed your flowers, though. They are so, y'all. You deserve your flowers, yeah. You deserve yours, too, but it's just like, I don't know. That was so sweet. I just love them. So sweet.

Okay, so wait, so you said you don't, you're not dating anybody right now. But if you were dating, would you be like, do y'all believe in sharing locations with the person that y'all dating? Mm-mm. Where's y'all stamp? Hey, I'm Ruby Carr, the host of the podcast, OnCore. Check out our brand new episodes featuring music from the show that everyone is reheating as we speak.

Heated rivalry. Join me as I go behind the songs that brought Shane and Elya together. I'll tell you the stories of Fice, My Moon, My Man, Wolf forades, I'll believe in anything, and tattoos all the things she said, and how they all became a part of this global phenomenon. Stream encore on IHeart Radio, Crave, or wherever you get your podcasts. What's up, fam? I'm sports journalist Ari Chambers. Hey, what's up, y'all?

It's your girl, Sam J. And we're the host of everyone watches women's sports, a new podcast from Together and I Heart Women's Sports. Because let's be real. Women's sports is giving us way too much to talk about these days. So Kelsey Finler, she became the first female solo rower to go from California to Hawaii. My first thought is like, what's up with the snacks? Like, what are we eating? The highlights, the rivalries, the breakout stars, the moments to take over your entire timeline. And the conversations that start during the game and somehow keep going all week. Every week, we're breaking down the biggest stories across women's sports.

Naomi Osaka showing out, she beat Sabalinka. Shout out to you, Naomi. You get the palm, Naomi. You get the palm for that. Because we're not just interested in what happened. We're interested in why everyone's talking about it. Because everyone watches women's sports. Listen to everyone watches women's sports on the IHeart Radio app.

Apple Podcast or wherever you get your podcast. Hey, Portlandia fans. Carrie Brownstein and Fred Armisen here. You know us or rather you know them. Tony and Candle. Nina and Lance, Spike, and yes, The Chicken. We've played a lot of iconic characters over the years, but today we're showing up as ourselves to tell you about Podlandia, AEO rewatch, our brand new podcast.

Each week, we'll revisit an episode of Portlandia from the very beginning, breaking down the sketches, exploring the backstories of our most iconic characters, revisiting the Portland locations you know and love, and opening up about our creative process. How did any of this get made? Why do we think that was a good idea? We're ready to talk about it. And we'll also be joined by the people who helped bring it all to life. Guestrars, collaborators and friends, including director Jonathan Chrysall, the mayor himself, Kyle McLaughlin,

legendary musician Amy Mann, and many more. Kyle is going for it here. You fully improvised, not just words, but a song, a melody. I thought he was going to write. I thought you were all going to write a song. I remember you thinking that. Listen to Podlandia. Ayo, rewatch on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

I'm Nick Totoro. You probably know me from NYPD Blue, the longest yard, or Spike Lee's Black Klansman. But I'm also from Queens, which means I know pizza. And on my new podcast, delivering happiness with Nick Tatoro,

I deliver pizza from Prince Street pizza to a new guest. Are you delivering pizza now? Then we sit down for a real conversation. I've shared a slice with everyone. From Seth Rollins. What are you doing my belt? To Alex Rodriguez. Just to let you people know,

we're talking to one of the goats here. To Bill Burr. I don't think I've ever. I've met somebody so exactly out of their mind as I am. And now we even have more great guests coming up, including the great John Tituro. It's called Happiness. Delivering Happiness. Mariano Rivera.

Oh, my God. And many, many more. Open your free High Heart Radio app. Search Delivering Happiness with Nick Totoro. And listen now. Some of that. No, I don't. Not at all.

No. Because when I used to share a local, when I used to share my location, this nigga would call me like, so why are you in that neighborhood? Why are you over there? I'm like, bro, I'm at Myers. What are you talking about? I'm at Myers, bro. I think it's a little toxic. You think it's toxic?

Why do you need all that? I think it's more of a safety thing. So I don't mind sharing my location with my man, but it just depends. Niggas don't be wanting to share their location and who, not. That's like getting somebody named and I'm not sharing my location with you and you not

sharing your location with me. But I also do feel like if you're constantly checking my location, like there's something wrong with you. Yeah. Like if you have like how I share my locations with my sisters, like, okay, cool, they're not constantly trying to see where I am or what I'm doing. I'll be checking my friends locations a lot. Catch me in a lie or none of that. It's just safety measures.

Like if I share my location with my man, it's just, I so don't give a fuck. I don't, it's so, I don't even know how to check a motherfucker location that I have. have. Like, literally my sister will be with me and she'll be like, man, I left my phone. She'll be like, can you check my location? I'd be like, bitch, how? This literally just happened to me like yesterday. So y'all don't think that y'all would want to share what y'am for safety reasons. Yeah, I would. I will send you my location. But if he's toxic and weird, if it was to ever get like weird and toxic, I'd be like, I'm cutting it off. It's nay on the elation K. But my ideal next guy, I would, that would be a safe

space to share my location, but I just feel like when I did do it in the past, it just like more so worked against me than like for me. Like, bro, I'm sharing my location. Why are you questioning me about where I'm at? At 4 p.m. It's crazy. Okay. Sharing locations. For me, it's a no. Following your guy on Instagram or social media, period. Yeah, your name. Yay. I would rather not. Yeah, when I say I don't follow a single person I ever cracked. Single guy I ever cracked. Because I will get irritated.

Because if I see somebody I don't like liking your stuff or something like that, and I feel like those are petty arguments, you can like whoever's stuff you want to like and all that. So I just feel like it's unnecessary drama that it brings. I don't lie. A man's persona online will turn me off. Granted. I like you way better in person. And then like see the stuff that you post and be like, ugh.

That's what's happening in my love life. Or even like how many girls pictures UNA likes. Like that's aggravating. Your nigga just floating around his little dumb ass He is. Just a little thirsty. Like I don't need to see that. Thirst my curse. Ew.

Get back. Oh my gosh. Yeah, that's, I don't like that. I don't want to see your man and 2100 other motherfuckers. Your thirsty ass nigga. Like this. And then it's just, and you posting yourself

selfies or posting stupid shit. Like you walk into the mailbox. It's just ugly. Like, get in the field, nigga. Get off. What I tell them, Trop? Go to war. Please.

Not this war, though. Go to war. Okay. Not this one. Go build a car. A house. Join the Black Panthers. Join the...

They changed their name or something, I believe. But you... The Black Coalition. You talked about persona on the internet. All right. Please, please. This, when people are, when you're riding with the guy, oh, God. You're riding in the car with the guy?

He's listening to his favorite song. And what is it, trap? He's off beat or he's just like, what is it that turns you off? Don't know the words? It's not, not knowing the words. It's just the vibe. Y'all, I kid you not. One time I was riding with this man.

And I was on the fence. Like, we were just dating, nothing serious yet. whatever. And I'm just like, da-da-da. And bro, it was like, it was my ox. It was like a Jay-Z song playing or something.

Oh, you were trying to be smooth. This must have been, it was like a, not a playlist, but I was on a random YouTube music. So it's just random shit, just spewing off. So, bruh, this song starts in must have been his shit.

When I say, I decided I did not like this man any longer in that moment, the way he started bobbing his head. What was the song? What was the song? Was it on beat? Or that's how he was moving?

Bitch who looked like radio. What was the song? Was it always close? It might have been a song cry or something. He was not. He was not moved like, though. He was like, this is my shit. That is my shit, though.

But why do you do it? It's right. It's my song. No, y'all don't understand the way it was looking. It was just like, I'm like, bro i kid you not the way he was bobbing his head and just like singing the song it's all right now you look like he wonder what i say this nigger was about to mind you he's driving this nigga at any moment was about to pull out

the finger drumsticks like oh shit he was i really want to guess who this nigger was don't even bitch obviously i'm not going to say it on here but it looked like he wanted to be like Oh, yeah. You never thought. One thing I will say, oh, no, no, no, no, no, I don't like them. Drop me off. Next. One thing I will say about Troptoe, this bitch know how to pick him.

We had like a holiday. I think it was Easter, y'all. It was Easter, y'all. She soft-launched. She hard-launched this nigga to us that she was talking to. He comes. He come in. And we all, somebody was on the ox.

This nigga begged for the ox, y'all. He requested the ox. And what do you play, Key? Tell me. What he played? Some bullshit. I mean, and he took the ox like. With pride.

He took the ox like, uh-uh, who's on the ox? Give me that. DJ, drop that shit. Bro, he started playing some shit. Like, what is that song? He said, you fucking on me. With all the kids running around. Bitch the Easter Bunny is here.

He said, Trout, listen. He said lock in. Lock in. Hello. But I'm not done, though. Yes. But he wasn't done.

Then he played. Can you throw me the paper towels? My titty's way so bad. Then he played DMX. DMAX. What, what, what, which song was it, Trow? Bitch, I don't remember.

Any D'AmX song is out of poverty. I suppress my niggas or whatever. Oh, it might be. I suppress those memories. All I know is, bro. We was literally like all looking around. All my sisters is side-eyeing and looking

and I'm like Like, bitch I was like On Easter Sunday Y'all should have did him like What's that Easter? What was that Apollo sweep his ass out of the house? Because what?

Tomato tomato I mean And the thing is he really He was doing that shit He was doing the radio Like that song was playing It was some that little baby in Gunner or whatever I think the song was like

He turned off some cool shit That's what was playing. At the best of time. Because this was a minute ago. And he said, man, who, who's playing that shit? Oh, he turned from that. I said, oh, man. He turned that off and he said, he played, what these bitches want from a nigga?

What the fuck? Are you okay? I'm so dead. We were not okay. It was, I mean. Okay. Well, speaking of cringy things, Mike, play that video for me right there. Cringy, cringy things.

I'm, okay. Now, it's a lot of, this is kind of off topic, but, no, it's not. There's a lot of podcasts with, like, couples. Could y'all imagine doing a pod with somebody that you're dating or you're... No, thank you. No. I like being on here with my bitches. With my girls.

I like to be a little bit more unfiltered than probably what I would... I mean, I would probably see. And also, like, I don't want you to have no dialogue that's going to piss me off. Like, if you, like, my sister or something, like, okay, but my nigger, like, no. Okay, drop the beat. We locked in. Okay, Mike played the end of the video. Basically, they were talking about

if I can walk around with you on soft, then we are locked in. Like if a man was walking around with that thing and then shriveled up looking like the day he was born. Mm-hmm. You love him. Yeah.

You're okay with that? Yeah. Get some draw zone. I don't know what your shit look like. I'm not a tripping. I love you. I'm the only person should be walking out with their cat out.

Why is your cat out? I mean, I'm not saying if you, shit, because you just put that thing on them. I promise y'all. I don't care. That shit don't buy the man. Honestly, I'm offended if a man sleep and he's not naked. I'm offended. True, true.

That's cool. Walking around on us off. If we just did it. If we just did it and you not sleep and naked. I ain't going to hold y'all. You're being fully called after we did it? One of the funniest videos in my phone is of a nigger walking around on soft. And we were like talking shit to each other and not.

I was like, yeah, niggins. What you got the same now? And he was like hiding behind ducking and dodging corners and shit. But it's like, you're my baby. Who cares? I got a video on my phone of a man taking a leak in his lizard. And it was very. That sounds so disgusting.

I don't know. But don't get a little like. Leaking his lizard sounds so disgusting. It wasn't. It stays 100% soft when AP. It looks like it was. No, he's hard with NAP. That's what I'm saying.

It gets a little erect so that they can aim. You know they're supposed to wipe their ass sitting down. I don't know they dick is hard when they pee. I don't think it was. How is it soft while he's peeing? What? So, we have men right here. So when y'all pee, it gets like a little mid to it.

Wait, why? I'm pretty. You could be, you can aim on sauce? Wait a second. You think big is that I can get in a hard to go feed? So no, that niggas be pissing on them. that be pissing on the feet. I don't think that you have to be hard to pee, but for the line of piss to come out.

Imagine if you had to be turned on to pee. Not turned on, but your dick is standing up because piss is coming out of it. They got a joke. You're just letting your cousin. You hold it. Oh, yeah, you do hold it. They do be holding it. Shoot every which way.

Oh, wow. I never thought of that. After you. I'm too hard. You can't aim that motherfucker. That's why after 60. I would think that hard is. easier to a

I mean, but do y'all, so after y'all have, after y'all, who, do y'all pee not be sprinkling all over the place?

It'd be like a fier. Yeah, it'd be like, it'd be like, sprinkler. How many holes we got down there? Because it's like, I feel like it'd be coming

at all three of the holes. Yeah, it feels like it. It's two? Oh, well, and the ass is three. But you only have one urethro, but it literally goes north-south-east-west after.

I don't know north-south-east-west, none of that, so. So. Oh, I really did think that a man had to be on hard to pee. I mean, like, not turnt on, but I just, I'm not. Yeah, like a little, some, some, a little sick to be. Yeah, same. I'm like, let me go in there with you and your people.

Because we already know y'all niggas stand up when y'all white. And they don't soft. And they're on top. And they're a damn boy, mom. My son smashed his penis in the toilet seat the other day. Yikes. Did he cry? I was in my room for one of all the heart.

And I'm like, what? What? What? What's wrong? I'm still laying in the bed though. What's wrong? What's wrong? He was like, the toilet seat closed on my pee pee pee.

And I was like, and in my head, I'm like, little ass penis. How did it? The toilet seat didn't even clamp on it. What was he doing? Why are you blaming him? I'm not. I'm not. I was in there doing something.

I don't know what he was in there doing. He probably was like, You said blame the mama. Yeah. But also, how slow are your reflexes that this little bitty pee-p got caught in the toilet seat? It probably came down to ass, bitch. I just can't imagine it. He just got his order operations.

He probably didn't put it all the way of us. Instead of move, put the toilet seat down. He said, put the toilet seat down. He probably tried to, like, stand into it and flush it. Some. He probably put it up too fast and stuff. That sounds like, I want great kids. All right.

All right. Oh, I challenge all women this week. Throw away your toys. Throw a second day. I don't have a way. Excuse me. Your toys. We got to get back to good old-fashioned DJing. I beg your finest part.

We're losing feeling in our vagina. And we want these men to fuck like robots. Who can't? Because we used to the. Rose 9,600 and the honeycomb dick stretcher 23. Batteries, they charge them. You used to be my battery, I got old toys. I'm an old freak.

I got toys that still got batteries in them. Now, you plug it up like a Tia damn iPhone charger. Yep. You can charge it from your computer. I used to take batteries out of my blood pressure monitor to put into my toy. You ain't shit. Whoa, Barbie. I was like, I gotta get this off.

Come on. Gotta get this nut off. So I'm showing you y'all to get back to DJ and get back to doing. What was that song? Oops. There goes my shirt above my head. Oh my. She was talking about DJing that.

Kitting in there. I'm sorry. I could still flip my being real good. But sometimes that'll make your arm hurt. Your arm get tired. You got to like lay on it and make it go. Who wants to do that? And make it feel like somebody else is doing it.

It don't even take that long, y'all. You don't. That's because you're a professional DJ. The crazy thing is I could. I don't play with toys. It really be the thoughts. Like the thoughts that you're thinking about in your head. If I think, if I got some freaky tales going on in my brain.

Well. That's my thing. I don't show everybody. Throw those toys away. Get back into DJing and getting to know your body. And your need to. And your niger, let your man please you. Well, I don't have no man.

Yes. Same kind of. I can't get addicted to no machine. Like, I still want a man to be able to... I told you, I bought that rose. Please me. And it had an extendo clip on it. And once it went dead, I'm like, I'm never charging it again.

Bitch that sounds like the Nimbus 3-thous. What the fuck is that? I lost my rose. You put it on this and then you can stick another thing up in there. It's like, it's crazy. That's the damn devil. Like, Grey Wolf Lodge. I've still never used a rose, y'all.

That's good. you go girl I hate that for you but go them roses away now they got a hammer they got a hammer vibrator like what are we doing

shit beating the put no I'm just playing beating it down that's not flicking it down to the ground that was crushing it y'all clicks gonna fall off

who's I don't I don't even do that very often But if a toy company wants to sponsor, it's 520 somewhere, you know, the freakiest girls on the couch. I'll break my street for you. I'm a candy. I'll use it every night.

Listen. I'll use it on track. I'll fight every night to prove my love. I'll use it on trap. We can get into that. But I'm going to leave my being alone. Until then. Until next time, America.

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