Club Shay Shay - Club Shay Shay - Dr. Cheyenne Bryant Part 2

Episode Date: December 3, 2025

Visit https://prizepicks.onelink.me/LME0/SHANNON and use code SHANNON and get $50 in lineups when you play your first $5 lineup! Exclusive $45-off Carver Mat at https://on.auraframes.com/SHAYSHAY.  Promo Code SHAYSHAY Shannon Sharpe sits down with Dr. Cheyenne Bryant—renowned life coach, psychology expert, spiritual mentor, and influential voice in wellness and relationships—for a powerful and deeply personal conversation. Dr. Bryant opens up about growing up in Los Angeles with teenage parents, navigating emotional turmoil, and witnessing addiction, violence, and instability in her household. She explains how her mother’s drug use, her father’s involvement in the streets, and the pain she endured shaped her worldview, her healing journey, and her path toward becoming a leading mental health figure. She also shares why she is grateful for the examples she observed, using Cam Newton as an illustration of learning what not to do. Dr. Bryant reflects on how these early experiences influenced her understanding of relationships, including why people choose certain partners, how childhood wounds show up in adulthood, and how she rebuilt her sense of self-worth. She speaks candidly about her father’s passing, her teen pregnancy and abortion, and the work required to forgive and break generational cycles. The conversation shifts to her media and coaching career. Dr. Bryant discusses co-producing MTV’s Teen Mom Family Reunion, her time on Basketball Wives, and working with icons like Iyanla Vanzant and Oprah Winfrey. She addresses public scrutiny, criticism around her credentials, misconceptions about life coaching, and the differences between therapy and coaching. She also offers insight into the mental health challenges facing Black men. Dr. Bryant and Shannon explore modern dating, breaking down healthy relationships, dating patterns, toxic cycles, submission, alpha women, finances, “princess energy,” polyamory, cheating, and why some people pursue taken partners. She also gives candid views on athletes and entertainers, marriage, prenups, red and green flags, conflict resolution, love languages, transactional dating, and whether women should shoot their shot. Dr. Bryant also speaks on Summer Walker’s viral situation and what it reveals about modern relationships. They dive into men’s loneliness, emotional leadership, dating without fear, and balancing ambition with partnership. Dr. Bryant highlights the importance of trauma healing, boundaries, emotional maturity, and discovering self-worth. She speaks about motherhood, why she chooses not to date men with children, the rise of older women giving birth, whether people should stay for the kids, and the dangers of settling. She weighs in on Michelle Obama’s comments about a woman president, Ayesha Curry’s criticism, and the pressures fame puts on relationships. Dr. Bryant also breaks down her new book Mental Detox, how 50 Cent helped her secure her publishing deal, La La Anthony’s support, and the co-parenting lessons people can learn from La La. She shares her experience meeting Shedeur and Deion Sanders and discusses the mental health issues affecting Black athletes today.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

I'm Stefan Curry, and this is Gentleman's Cut. I think what makes Gentleman's Cut different is me being a part of developing the profile of this beautiful finished product. With every sip, you get a little something different. Visit gentlemen's cut bourbon.com or your nearest Total Wines or Bevmo. This message is intended for audiences 21 and older. Gentleman's Cut Bourbon, Boone County, Kentucky. For more on Gentleman's Cut Bourbon, please visit gentlemen's cut bourbon.com. Please enjoy responsibly.

Hey there, Dr. Jesse Mills here. I'm the director of the men's clinic at UCLA, and I want to tell you about my new podcast called The Mail Room. And I'm Jordan, the show's producer. And like most guys, I haven't been to the doctor in way too long. I'll be asking the questions we probably should be asking, but aren't. Every week, we're breaking down the world of men's health from testosterone and fitness to diets and fertility.

We'll talk science without the jargon and get your real answers to the stuff you actually wonder about. So check out the Mailroom on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get, favorite shows. Podcasters, it's time to get the recognition you deserve. The IHeart Podcast Awards are coming back in 2026. Got a mic?

Then you've got a shot. Every year, we celebrate the most creative, compelling, and game-changing voices in podcasting. Is that you? Submit now at IHeartPodcastawards.com for a chance to be honored on the biggest stage in the industry. Deadline December 7th. This is your chance.

Let's celebrate the power of podcasting and your place in it. Enter now at iHeartpodcastawards.com. Hey, it's Eric Andre. You won't believe what happened on the latest episode of bombing with Eric Andre. First time I tried to land 900, I fell forward, broke my rib, and I was late to pick up my son at preschool.

Wow. Our latest episode features Tony Hawk, Rico Nasty, Yamanika Saunders, and Derek Beckles. Listen to bombing with Eric Andre on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast. I'll be with Eric Andre.

Hey everybody, Daniel Jeremiah here. And I'm Bucky Brooks. On Move the 6th, we take you inside the game from breaking down college prospects and NFL rookies to evaluating team-building philosophies, coaching trends, and how front offices construct winning rosters. We study the tape,

talk to decision-makers, and give you a perspective you won't find anywhere else. It's everything you need to understand the why behind what happens on Sunday. Don't miss it. Listen to the Move the Sticks podcast on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Thank you for coming back. Part two is underway.

Toxic relationship. How soon do you think a person, can you tell, I mean, could you tell within, say, a week, a couple of months that this is going to be toxic? There's too much toxicity in this, and this is not going to end well, and I just need to go down. Red flags show up, I believe, in their first interaction. People just choose not to see them because they're desperate. There's two people. There's people who have a full plate and they've got to make room for what they want. And there's people that have an empty plate.

And they want anything just to fall on it at any time. That's called desperation. You can see red flags when you have a full plate from the beginning. Me and you can have a conversation at a restaurant or at a gym, right? And the first five, ten, ten, 50 minutes, I can tell. He's too resistant for me. He's not going to be conducive for me. Or this man knows how to have a conversation with my strong personality.

This might work out. You will be able to tell, who she feisty, not my type. Yeah, man. Or we got a live one here. Live with here. Or like, ooh, that fiery is kind of sexy to me. I like this, strength. I can play with this.

Those things show up the first five, ten minutes, if you're not desperate. Desperation means I'm coming in with my own idea of what. I want you to be. I'm afraid to see you for who you are because that means I may have to say no to you. And I want somebody so bad that I'm going to put my ID on you, not see none the red flags on purpose so that I can have something to plug into. That's desperation. How about I see you as you are and not how I wish you to be?

Because I think that's a lot of things that be at play. They don't see the person for who they actually are, but who I wish you to be. That's the fairer ideology. I wish you were wine, but you water. We are not Jesus. We are not turning water to wine. This is always going to be water. And what people do is they go, mm, it's wine, sit it on the shelf, watch this.

And every time they take a sip, they're like, oof, I don't like you. Right. I don't like you because you're not wine. But how many times does that water tell the person, I'm just water. Just plain water. I'm just water. Can you fix a toxic relationship? Can you be toxic in the beginning and all of a sudden not be toxic?

Yes, but it takes a whole hell of a lot of work and a lot of dedication. And it takes two people that are in therapy, having individual sessions and couple sessions. So my couples come individually one week and then a couple's next week, individual and couples. And it takes a lot of self-awareness, meaning I'm going to be poking and thriving and give an inventory on this is how you usually. show up that is causing impairment for yourself. See, we don't really cause impairment for people first. The impairments that you experience,

I'm already experiencing within me. Otherwise, you could have never experienced them. So if you think you have a problem with the shit you got a problem with me with, how you think I'm dealing with myself? That's what people have to understand. So that thing that you do, that doesn't work

for us, you do it with you and don't like it anyways. That's how it shows up in our relationship. So when you're in session with me as your doctor, I'm saying, listen, Shannon, that thing that you keep doing that she doesn't like, tell me how you like it within yourself. And I've almost never heard a person say, oh, I love that I drink and I'm abusive, do you? Because what does yourself talk when you're drinking? How abusive are you with your narrative to yourself when you are under the influence? Damn, doc, you're right.

Damn, doc. So let's fix it with you. because if I could fix it with you, guess what? It won't happen with her. But what people go wrong at, they want to fix it within the relationship. Without fixing themselves. Come on now, but you still got it.

Right. So if you got it, you're going to project it. We are all just little projectors walking around here. Everything I have, you are going to feel less. So I'm just projecting on to you who I am. If I feel sexy, you're going to see sexy in me because I'm projecting that. I'm eluding that. If I'm feeling insecure, you're going to feel, so we're just projectors.

And yes, folks can go from toxic, or, you know, trauma bonds to healing bonds. But that usually happens with folks who've been married for 10, 15 years, I'm being honest, where they have toxic and trauma, they hail out of each other. And they came to a peak of saying, one thing we know for sure we don't want to leave. We don't want to leave each other. Right. But we don't want to stay like this. But we can't stay like this.

Now, unless those two people know that, one thing is I don't want to leave you, you don't want to leave me. We just can't stay like this. The relationship can work past it. Right. But if one of us wants out, it's over. It's not working past it. It's not working past it.

No. But when you get a relationship where they say, look, Shannon, I'm just never going to leave you. And you're like, Doc, I'm not, I ain't going nowhere. But we got to do better than this. And you're like, we do. We're in a good position. Okay. And we can work through that.

Okay. I like that. this this uh this relationship with the women now you got to take me here you got to take me there we go in half on the bills i just grew up like i said i'm going from a different time my grandfather handled all the bills um i never remember i when i was in high school or college i never really heard a woman says i took my took him to the movies or i bought i never heard that that i guess i don't know when did that when that came about that you know women took guys on days and they paid for things you not like that i've just oh i just oh i just that's how i'm a man's man you're just a man's man so i pay i pay

all the bills we go out to eat i pay i do i do i do i do all that if i don't know i mean have a woman taking me to dinner yes but i probably can count on one hand in my 57 years of living that someone is taking me to dinner and actually pay for it taking me to a movie and pay for it i just i just i don't feel i feel i don't i feel i don't i feel less than yeah Yeah. What's the question? So what, yeah, what happened? That's sexy. You ask, wait, what's the question? Because if a man is saying I'm taking care of everything,

and you got a woman who is, you're a man's man, and I'm a lady's lady. Of course, I'm going to want to spoil you at times. But I would have no problem with you saying, baby, I want to take care of everything. It wouldn't stop me from still buying you things and loving on you. But I would show love as a lady. When did the 50-50 come into effect? Or when did we get to this notion that some of these restaurants and everything ain't got to be master's or state 48? When did we like, oh, that is beneath me.

You can't take me there. So there's a two-part question that I'm hearing. One of the 50-50 become the thing, right? So that's a two-part answer. Okay. One part is when desperation start to become a thing with women. Okay. Where, again, anything, just a breadcrumb, please fall on my plate.

Right. And I'll even buy the breadcrumb and the loaf. Wow. Just fall on my plate. That's a woman operating from a desperate space of I would do anything to have somebody. I don't care what it is or what I have to do. I'll take care of you. I'll pay a bill or two or three.

You can move in with me. It doesn't matter. You can be the father of my kids and do nothing for these kids. As long as you come by and sleep with me once a week, I'm okay with that. desperation. Then you have these other women who say, look, I'm with this man. He's a great man. He's faithful. He's loving. He's a family guy. He does well, but not enough to sustain my lifestyle. Okay. So he may pay for 60% of things. And I don't mind doing the other four. That's a whole different woman who's saying that I want to bill with this man and I see so much value in him that I don't mind making some monetary investments in us. Nothing wrong with that. Desperation, big problem. Okay. But as far as, you know, a, I think a man saying, I want to take care of everything. And you remember, I was a kept woman. Yeah.

And I can say this. I was engaged twice, my first fiancé who was a great guy. He made money, but I was a breadwinner. Mm-hmm. Okay? The second guy was a kept woman. I wasn't always as respectful to the first guy where I was winning the bread and where I was in the more masculine role when it come to bills.

Oh, I can't believe you was like that. This is the truth. Let me tell you what happens, though. What happens? When a man can't provide for a woman and he wants to, he naturally emasculates himself. Mm-hmm. And when you emasculate yourself, how in the hell do I respect a man who was emasculated within himself? Because remember, I'm just the mirror it.

Life is mirroring you. Mm-hmm. So as you become emasculated and you feel less than because you can't provide what you want to do. Yes. Even if I didn't ask you to. Even if I didn't ask you to, now, how am I supposed to respect someone who doesn't respect themselves?

I'm going to respect you at the level that you respect yourself. It doesn't mean that I'm calling you out your name. It just means respect level. Now, the second fiancee who took, I was kept, I didn't buy a grape. I mean, I don't have card notes now, but I have card notes then to a G-Wragging. A bit. And this man took over everything. What?

Everything. You ain't married him? Honey, everything. Now, they, yeah, be quiet. Mind your business over there. My name's over there. Everything. My love or respect for him was very different.

Very different. Now, not that I denied either one of them, you know, love making in the home or, but the first guy was, by all means necessary, I'm in college, I'm building my business, I'm making money, I'm in my bag, you're secondary. Kind of how you are with work. Oh, you're denying him. Not, well, not intimacy. You didn't deny that?

No, not neither one. I don't believe in that. Okay. If I'm with you and we're intimate, I'm not going to be doing that sometime. I don't. I'm very submissive when it comes to that. I'm not into casual sex. So if we are doing the do, we're going to do it.

We are committed and we are together. I have full access to you and everything you got going on. And this, we are committed. So I don't need to deny you. My sex drive is so high that if I'm mad, there's no denying. We're going to do what we do. Now, move past that. We move past that.

It always been like that, even in my 20s and I'm in my 40s. So use your imagination. Now, what? What? Yes. Now, the guy who took full care of me... He might circle back. Please don't.

He might circle back here and you talk like this? Do not. Do not. You go home, he right in the driveway. Do not. Now, now, I had a level of respect for him where I put work second. I couldn't wait to cook for him. There was times where he would get back from practice.

It's 12.1 a.m. at night and we sitting in bed and he's like, babe, like, I want X, Y, Z to eat. And it wasn't him asking me to do it. I got up, put my gospel music on, and was making sure I was cooking for this man. Whatever he needed. When he was working, I would make coffee every single morning and I was so submissive that, you know, I can just warn the coffee or put the damn milk in. No, he wanted the milk in first, the milk warmed up, then the coffee put an after. Now, how would he know I'm doing it that way? He went in the kitchen, but I still did it that way. Because I know that's what he liked. Because I know that's what he was.

like and because the investments that he was making in us to cover me to take care of me how could I not make any and every investment that I had to show him that I'm grateful and that my position that he put me in as far as being kept was not taking for granted and so there was nothing that he asks of me that I didn't not want to do meaning I wanted to do these things and I would even check in sometimes and be like is there anything more that I could or not be doing, whether it's from sexually to cooking. I don't eat red meat. He a black man. He loves his pork chops and his steaks. Yeah, yeah. And I'm cooking all the red meat that I don't eat and I'll just make me something separate on the side. Wow. But because this man created an environment

that was safe. Now, not only was he paying bills, but this man was faithful. I had full access. Not only am we living together, but I have passwords to cell phones and social media. You sure you don't want to go back and get it? I don't. And bank accounts. I mean, you ain't going to find nobody better than he paying all the bills and let you get the password to account. Hey, babe, let me get your phone. Let me call my girlfriend.

Here you go, Bay. He has two beautiful girls. Oh, that's right. He had the key. By two different women. And the girls were never at issue. He did a great job at the co-pay. And I got to give him his flowers.

He did a great job at blending, meaning like there was never baby mama drama. The girls were very respectful of me and me of them. You know, we did things as a family. So, but I say that to say there plays a role in certain women on how they can respect who they're with. I want to say this to women. If you can't respect them, you shouldn't choose him. If the dollar amount that he makes is going to lessen your respect for him or lessen his value to you, don't choose him. If he needs to take full care of you for you to submit, he ain't the right one.

you got to choose somebody who you know that every time you give them every single thing that you got that you're doing it because you love doing it and it turns you on too every time I did something for that man I was turned on

I don't remember doing one thing Shannon for him that I was like oh yeah I mean nothing I mean it was just okay baby okay daddy to the point where

and folks gonna have an issue with this I don't care I would get dressed and wear certain things and we go out and do our wherever we go into a game or whatever to families. If he said that's too much I changed. What?

Without a problem. He wasn't controlling. It wasn't take that shit off. It was like, baby, that might be a bit much. Yeah. No problem. To the point where I'd have come out and be like, okay, is this good? Because he had me so safe. He had me so covered that I wanted to make sure that I reciprocated that same safety and covering for him.

See, women cover you. all differently. And our covering is allowing you all to one be exactly who you need to be right, to be in your full pleasure of your masculinity and also to submit to your needs of us that are past

just sexual and domesticated. If he had a request by me that wasn't abusive and I was okay with, why does it matter? And if like he would say, if I am the only man you're trying to be sexy for why does it matter?

There be times where he would say, baby, don't wear makeup. Like, I like you with no makeup. It's gorgeous. Just throw your hair with no makeup. Now, I love to be daughter. I love to be daughter. Yeah, yeah. But I would do it for him, no makeup.

Because I'm sure there's many times where I wanted Giuseppe boots. Or the Paris trip, him and I took. Hold on. Or the trip to Africa we took. What? That he probably, not probably, that I seen him have to work double and triple for. That he didn't huff-a-puff about. There were times where this man got two jobs to make sure that.

things were covered that I wanted. So me changing clothes or him having a request as something is minute to me seeing him put in the work to make sure that I'm happy beyond just having a roof up from my head. And I think that, you know, and that was his first time taking care of a woman, and he was 50 at that time. I was 14 years younger than him. I think that women state, they want a safe space for them to be in their soft and they're feminine. But on the flip side, men also need an environment that makes them feel very loved, submitted to, appreciate it when they're taking care of your ass as well. I think it goes both ways. Yeah.

It is definitely a reciprocal thing. And I think that when we get to a place of understanding that, it's a win-win situation in the relationship. And then you start to see what the Bible talks about equally yoked. So yeah, I would take that offer again of being kept in love and the hell out of my man. It just has to be the right one. Not him, but the right one. Why you say it like that? I don't want it.

Listen, when I'm done, when I've gone on, I've gone on. It's nothing to do with you. Oh, you never spun the block? No, I don't really, I don't spin the block. No, what happens is I can have long-term relationships, and if we happen to, you know, have a break of something, like we're just no longer in relationship, and then we happen to maybe get back into a relationship, yes.

But spinning the block, meaning like we're just going to go back and sleep together going to do this thing? No, that's not how I show up. No. Let me sit my dark. You see, I know you saw it because you, you know all things that's what's going on. Summer Walker went viral because she's had a relationship with Rich the Kear who's engaged and he saved her under Pizza Hut in his phone. I don't know what that means. Now, Pizza Hut used to have, this is before your time, but Pizza Hut used to have buffets.

They have all the pieces up there, and you just go get a slice of pepperoni, you know, whatever, mushroom. You get ground beef, all that anchovies. Just, I don't know what that mean. How did the fiancé find out that she was pizza hut? Do we know that? Don't start me to lie. Okay. I'm just trying to figure out what is it about women and married men?

Because normally married men, like, oh, she married? I don't want to Because men are different Hold on just look at a man He might not even He might not be as interested As he was once before But the moment another man

Show interest You will have a problem doc But women What is it about women That are attracted to married men Because I just saw the study They say women are more attracted To married men

Okay Another two-part question Yeah yeah yeah You're not messy your craft. First of all, men love married women as well. We're not going to let men off the hook.

A man will love to listen. A man will love to say, how you doing? Oh, I'm good. Can I get your number? I'm married. Oh, that's fine. It's all good. You can't have friends? You can't have friends?

So we're not going to make this a one gender thing. Men and women both will cross that boundary in disrespect, the satiety of marriage, equally. You thought so? The difference is the man who was saying, I don't care if you're married, is clearly boldly saying,

I just want to sleep with you. Okay. The woman who was saying, I like you because you married, she's saying at some point, I want her position. Oh. And women are usually attracted

to the married men who are good men to their wives. Mm-hmm. Not faithful men. I'm Stefan Curry, and this is gentleman's cut. I think what makes Gentleman's Cut different is me being a part of developing the profile of this beautiful finished product. With every sip, you get a little something different.

Visit gentlemen's cut bourbon.com or your nearest total wines or Bevmo. This message is intended for audiences 21 and older. Gentleman's Cut Bourbon, Boone County, Kentucky. For more on Gentleman's Cut Bourbon, please visit gentlemen's cut bourbon.com. Please enjoy responsibly. Hey there. Dr. Jesse Mills here. I'm the director of the men's clinic. at UCLA Health. And I want to tell you about my new podcast called The Mail Room. And I'm

Jordan, the show's producer. And like a lot of guys, I haven't been to the doctor in many years. I'll be asking the questions we probably should be asking, but aren't. Because guys usually don't go to the doctor unless a piece of their face is hanging off or they've broken a bone. Depends which bone. Well, that's true. Every week, we're breaking down the unique world of men's health, from testosterone and fitness to diets and fertility, and things that happen in the bedroom. You mean sleep? Yeah, something like that, Jordan.

We'll talk science without the jargon and get you real answers to the stuff you actually wonder about. It's going to be fun, whether you're 27, 97, or somewhere in between. Men's Health is about more than six packs and supplements. It's about energy, confidence, and connection. We don't just want you to live longer. We want you to live better. So check out the mailroom on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your favorite shows. Podcasters, it's time to get the recognition you deserve.

The IHeart Podcast Awards are coming back in 2026. Got a mic? Then you've got a shot. Every year we celebrate the most creative, compelling, and game-changing voices in podcasting. Is that you? Submit now at iHeartPodcastawards.com for a chance to be honored on the biggest stage in the industry. Deadline December 7th. This is your chance.

Let's celebrate the power of podcasting and your place in it. Enter now at IHeart Podcast. The big take podcast from Bloomberg News dives deep into one big global business story every weekday. A shutdown means we don't get the data, but it also means for President Trump that there's no chance of bad news on the labor market. What does a bacon, egg, and cheese sandwich reveal about the economy? Our breakfast foods are consistent consumer staples, and so they sort of become outsize indicators of inflation. What's behind Elon Musk's trillion-dollar payout? There's a sort of concerted effort to message that Musk is coming back.

He's putting politics aside. He's left the White House. And what can the PCE tell you that the CPI can't? CPI tries to measure out-of-pocket costs that consumers are paying for things, whereas the PCE index that the Fed targets is a little bit broader of a measure. Listen to the big take from Bloomberg News every weekday afternoon. on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Hey, it's me, Eric Andre, bombing with Eric Andre and Will Ferrell's Big Money Players and the IHeart Radio. We are back! With fresh chaos. Our latest episode features Tony Hawk, Rico Nasty, Yamanika Saunders, and Derek Beckles.

Here's a fraction of what happened. This is your worst injury in your career, correct? It's the most traumatic in terms of, uh, Danger factor and life-threatening, yes. What were the injuries? Fractured skull, broken thumb, fractured pelvis. Look at your thumb. Yeah, it changed my signature.

I can tell if I signed stuff before or after that. You got help insurance? I do. I'm not explicitly putting down what I'm doing on insurance forms. Listen to bombing with Eric Andre on the Iheart radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast. Bombing, bombing with Eric Andre. Just good men. through their transactions,

not from their heart. Because they're not committed. Commitment is a heart thing. That's a spirit thing. So transactionally, I see that you do the things that I like. You got cars. You got first.

You got diamonds. Y'all going trips. Mm-hmm. So if you do that for her, maybe that's, you know, I'll be the starting quarterback one day. And y'all do it for her. Let me go further.

Y'all do more for her than you do for the wife. Way more for her. I have clients who have the password to their merry man's phone that the wife don't have the password to. She thinks that's a flex. You have the number because you know that he's married.

So you know there's other women. That's not a flex. She don't have the password because if she finds out, guess what? He got something to lose with her. He ain't got shit to lose with you, sis, because you decide chick. And it's very rare that y'all leave the wife for who? Side chick. Very rare.

That's the position that ain't up for grabs. because even if he ain't attracted to her the fact that he's even cheating on the wife is what makes him feel indebted to her side chicks are stupid to think it's the other way I'm already cheating on her I've already cheated on her multiple times because that's not his first time doing it

she has my kids at least we have family over here and the side chick is what gets me in a good enough mood to come home to her anyways and I can't leave her hanging like that baby? Because then she wouldn't get my retirement. And I've already done her wrong. So guess what? I'm forever indebted to her. So I can't leave this. This is why men say, I'm not going to leave what I'm indebted to. But I can come over here and play. And oftentimes, I found that the

merry man be in love with the side shake. Yeah, for sure. In love. And has still left her every time to remain at home. It is a very dead-in situation when a woman is attempting to take a position that ain't even up for grabs. They're just not up for grabs. It's not. You are this man's pacifier

and you are what this man needs to survive his marriage. You run out as promised land whatsoever. And so those kind of women are women who are extremely broken they have parental issues they are definitely lost in the sauce and there is no self-love or self-value or self-worth there whatsoever

you cannot value yourself and see yourself in the position of two or three because if he got kids that means you three you can't be one or two the wife and kids you're number three so you have somewhat self-worth

that you want to be number three for a trip to Fibaldi when women nowadays are making so much money on their own, Shannon. What? We can take ourselves to Bob. Hold on, you can take, hold on.

A madman can take a side chick to Bali? How he, how he poured that off? Oh, hey, you know, me and the boys going to Bali. Me and the boys go into the Maldives or the Mawfi Colts. How? Shannon, don't you sit up here and try to follow the boy code code? No. And I'll call the boy coat on purpose because men don't have codes.

Men are grown. The boy cold. What you mean? I'm going to work to Costa Rica to check on the restaurant that we own out there for a little bit. And it end up in a whole other country. Oh, I don't know about that. Or some men, okay, let's be real.

Men who can move like that have money called motion like that. Yeah. You can't be broke and move to Bali. Now, you can be broke and have a couple side checks in the hood. We're talking about going to Bali and going shopping. So usually those men have to have businesses. Yeah. And they're taking business tricks.

Okay, okay. And they're different places. Okay. So I always tell women this. If a man is trying to fly you out the country or the state that he lives in, to see you or date you, he has a wife or a woman, 100%. The first place you should be going when you visit this man is to his house, his casa. Whoa, whoa, whoa.

If it ain't in his house, there's somebody else in his house. Hold on, let me tell you something. Was dating somebody? And don't ask me who, because you know him real well. So mind your business. Okay. Don't be messy right now. You know him real well.

And he takes care of his mother. Yeah. And so she's there off. My first time him flying me to see him. He says, baby, do you want to stay here and know a mom's is here? Or would you rather us get a room somewhere else? Yeah. You like get a room.

I said stay there. Huh? You can't do that with the mom in the house? You can't do that. First of all, I'm not doing nothing my first time flying out of you. Because that's casual sex. Okay, I didn't know. Okay, my bad.

No. That's very presumptuous with me. I'm sorry. Take it back. Okay, I'm sorry. I thought this one, you know. But this is my thing. It was a test on his behalf for me,

but it also gave me transparency. Because he didn't just say my mom's here. I take care of my mom. Let me just put us in a room. Because I would have said no to the trip. He welcomed me to his home and gave me an option because he's letting me know, ain't no woman here.

You're more than welcome. So I came and stayed with him and mom and had a great time, a great time. And let me go further. You said, mom, is there any grown-ass man your age? Yeah. Taking care of your mama. She's not in the room next to you, baby.

And your house better be big enough to where she in another quarter of a half. Yeah, but still, I feel, I feel bad. But I'm just saying, do you get what I mean? If a man is not inviting you to his home, he is not thinking about making you his home. That's just what it is. Why am I flying out the country or state to see you

for the weekend or two? Fly me in when we are at your house. And after I visit at your house a couple of times, we could talk about going to Florida or Miami or Costa Rica or Columbia. Until then, I don't want to take a trip with you. I'm good because I have to have clarity that I'm not wasting my time. See, I have money. I can spend my own.

Wow. But I need to make sure that my time, which I don't get back. Right. That I can't clock in or get another speaking event. Right. That is not wasted. And I don't want to be in a situation where I've allowed you to deceive me. because every woman knows when a man moves a certain way, her spirit does something,

women just decide to go against it because they want that trip, they want that bag, they want that experience. We have to stop wanting experiences at the expense of our dignity, at the expense of our respect, at the expense of our self-love. Absolutely not. And I also find to women and men don't hate this, and I'm okay with that. the more we hold off on what y'all usually want that thing the more y'all do anyways the more y'all give and the more y'all do the only men who won't do more are the men who only want that so if you

want to vet them out anyways sis vet them out and watch them show up a man should penetrate your heart in your mind before he ever penetrates your body then you will really experience the true essence of an orgasm anyways. I've had men say to me, which besides the best friend, the guy I just mentioned about flying out to his home with the mom, he was one of them. If I can't marry you, I don't even want to touch your body. Now, that's a man who isn't a sucker. That's a man who is of age, a mature age, who is ready to have a wife. and he is no longer so superficial when he's thinking

that the best thing about a woman is her sex. He's finding value not only different in women, but watch this, in himself. Because I only get to experience the parts of you that you've already given you. And so a man who only sees value in a woman being just sex is a man who doesn't see value in himself. It is just, we are just mirrors to each other.

I see value in myself. That's why casually you cannot make love to my body. Because I don't see value in casual sex. I don't see value in an orgasm without being connected to you, without being committed to you, without having access to your home or to who you are or what you do. I don't see value in that. An orgasm doesn't do it for me. But your heart does, your commitment does, your time does, right?

Your thoughtfulness. Yes. That's what I want. Then you can take me to Bora Bora. Then we could be tearing Bore Bore up And you could be tearing me up and bore Bore But until then Until then

It ain't happening You're going to access me Love me You're going to pursue me You're going to court me And I will do the same with you And then by time we do do what we're doing It will be fireworks

People are having horrible sex too Because all they doing is Casually And they're calling freaky Good sex And this is why nobody But how come sexual relationships aren't even lasting? If it's so good, why y'all not f*** the same person for years at a time?

I'm confused because it ain't good. It's freaky. It's something you can get anywhere you go. That's what makes it casual. When you plug into a man or a woman and y'all are having real sensual sex that is nasty, not just freaky, you can't get that anywhere. That's a few of things. What about nasty is freaky? You can do freaky and nasty

But as long as it's fused and connected On a deeper level than just Casualty And that means the orgasm isn't what we are thriving for It's the act And the engagement of the sex That's orgasmic within itself

See, that's grown people talk You kids Y'all having this little high school sex Y'all doing that little rabbit shit still We don't want that We don't want that You can keep that right over there You're right over there.

I thought the further the trip, the freakier and the nastiest guy, doc. Listen. The further the trip to my heart, to my safe space, to my mind, to me accessing everything, your cell phone, everything you have is the more sex we have. That's the nastier that a woman who loves herself and respects herself will get. The more that you create an environment that I can trust. you in that I am safe in. It's not about freaky. I'll never say no. About whatever we, as long as I have the capacity to do it and take it, I will capacity inbound with you. But I got to be safe. I got to have access. And there has to be transparency. They say I read a study

to say the more educated the woman is the freakish year. Facts. I read that. Facts. I read that in Cosmo. The facts. Shout out to Cosmo. Shout out to Cosmo. Cheers, Cosmo. Yeah. How many degrees you say? You got? Six.

Oh, my goodness. Six. Gee. Lord have mercy. What you're a guy? When you're going to fight? You got a good one. Six.

Hey, somebody I just tell you. She said she's like, he's ready. Don't have them in my d'em. They're going to be that time about boy or boy? Do men and women cheat differently? They do. They do. But I'll answer that.

do we care about the different ways of cheating, or do we care about the dismantling and the impact of cheating? Because it's, I don't care how you did it. I'm dismantled now. My heart is broken. My safe space is scattered. Right.

And now I have to learn to love myself different and you. Because, see, if I didn't know you were a dog from the beginning, I was loving a good man. Mm-hmm. A good man eats something different, sleeps different and I love you different but if now I'm loving to Cancorso I'm feeding you different

right right I'm loving you different and I have to become a different what person so this is why cheating is so excruciating because it's not about people always say can we get the trust back the trust back

is way down here after we work through all of these layers can you learn to love a dog If we're married and I cheated on you, can you learn to love a dog? Not can you trust me again? Because trusting me means you have to believe that I'm no longer the woman that cheated on you. That's deception in itself. Can you love a woman who has deceived you and has the capacity to do it again?

Because whatever I've done to you, I now have the capacity. Right. Which means what? You now know what I'm capable of doing. Come on, baby. So can I love you knowing that you're capable of being a snake? Can I sleep in the bed with you knowing that you may not bark for six months? But in August, I might hear a rough, oh, that's right.

That's what you were. I'm with a dog. And now this Negro, this Cancorso needs that steak because you already got a taste of blood. Can I do that? If the answers, no, you have to dissipate the relationship. If the answer is yes, then we have to talk about what that looks like and it's going to look different on both of you. Yes, because you might can forget, because this is what happens, Doc, you might forgive, but you're not going to forget. Because the first time you get mad, you probably would that be.

You probably called that, you probably did this. And now we. And men cheat off of lust. women cheat y'all we cheat oftentimes because now we're vindictive on that bullshit you did no let me go further let me go further we so cold your home boy I'm gonna tell you how women work your home boy that was already looking at me five six years ago who I curved because I'm a good woman yeah because I wouldn't do you like that because I was loving a good man and not a dog Now, I said this to you earlier about Cardi being offset.

Yeah. Hmm, I've become a product of you. That means if you're deceptive, I became a product of what? Now, you've got to be deceptive. Or you could be deceptive. You don't have to be. There you go. This doesn't happen with everybody, but it happens with most people, men and women.

I will become a product of my environment before it becomes a product of me. My environment will change me before I change it. That's just law. So if I'm with a man who cheats long enough, it doesn't mean every woman will do it, but it does mean this. The deceptiveness in her, you can then uproot if it's in her. If it's in her, you are going to uproot it, period. Now, whether she acts on it or not is up to her. But when a woman chees just because she's cheating, not because of deception, it's not that we do it different.

It's that the male counterparts are for some women they cheat in with a woman. The woman counterparts seem to be able to regulate their emotions better, right, with the woman who's married, then let's just say women who are dealing with the married man. Because usually, remember again, the men who are sleeping with the married woman are sleeping with her for the sleeping compatibility, the sexual compatibility. But when a woman is sleeping with the married man, she has an end goal of taking that position. Right. Man ain't really looking like, oh, I want to be a hubby. Because you said it early on. A man who's trying to be a husband, he's like, he's turned off by a married woman.

Because he's not trying to go behind no other man anyways. No. That's a man who's like, I'm just trying to swing in when I can. And that man usually already has something at home, even if it's not a wife. So that woman is already his overcompensation for what he already has. So it's a win-win for him. Right. How do you, how do people break up?

Is there such a thing as breaking up amicably? Because, you know, sometimes, you know, look, and I was telling someone this. I said, breaking up is easy if you're the one that want to do to breaking up. True. When you don't want to be broken up with, it's hard. Just move on. It's not that simple when you still want to be in this relationship. Now, if you won't out, why you hit the door, hey, and don't even look back at the door.

And sometimes you, when you want out, you don't hit the door and not look back. Sometimes you hit the door and you, because I don't want to make it seem like the person leaving also isn't experiencing some heartbrain. You know, I left both my fiancés. And my first fiancé, I left and I was very heartbroken leaving him. It took me almost a year and a half just to leave. And we worked through the leaving together until we both were like, and we're both crying and excruciating pain and tears. years. His parents are there trying to help us break up. What?

Healthily. You know, so, yeah, so this was in my 20s, my first fiancé, but that was a very heartbreaking moment for him and I, right? It wasn't like scat and I'm good. The second fiancee, it was easier for me, right? Because I was already fed up and wanted out and knew that, you know, I started to dislike him as a person. That's what made it easier to leave.

Yes. Right? I liked his covering of me, but I started to not like him as a man. So that's easier to leave someone because you're like, I'm just turned off, right? The first one was like, you're just a dope-ass man. And leaving you is challenging. And if you could be a provider and didn't have certain conditions that I'm not going to share about him, right? Because I'm going to protect his privacy.

Then this relationship could be absolutely amazing. So that was challenging to leave. So I just want people to know that there are folks who are leaving who are bleeding while they leave too. And they're not running out the door saying, oh, I'm out, I'm free now. That is a coping mechanism that is a mask and it's fake. Everybody leaving who is doing the departing is feeling something. They're feeling the detachment. It might not be the one, it might not be to the extent of the one that's getting left, but they feel something.

They feel something. do have you uh i think there was a situation your offset was in your dm have you revealed anybody else that's ever been in your dm you put anybody on black i love that you said that offset was in my dm um and he just posed a question that said hey you know maybe you can help me with something he didn't say what it was that's all he said right um and because we he never followed through i never followed through We never did a session. He was never my client. When I shared that on Jason Lee's show, that was not a...

Like he was trying to slide. It was not a breach of confidentiality, first of all, because he was not and is not my client. So it was no breach. And he did not slide in my DMs asking for anything that had to do with me. It was very specific to, you know, hey, maybe you can help me with something. He never said what. And so when I said that, I was saying that to more use offset as an example because I could,

Because again, he's not my client, so that's not a breach of confidentiality, to say, listen, other black men, being the offset has a following. He's a rapper. He's in the limelight. He's, you know, he's attached to Cardi B. Asking for help is powerful. Right. You can slide in a DM to ask for help. It doesn't have to be to ask for something else. Yeah. And the fact that he did the appropriate thing. Right. And my intention was to give him props. Now, the Internet took it and made it something else. She tried to put him on masks. And I was trying to say, Listen, this man with all of his bad decision making, we're going to call it what it is. In that one moment, he made a right damn decision. And I was giving him as flowers and the internet took it as, this is her client.

I ain't telling shit. He's not my client. Neither one of us followed up. And that's just what it was. It was more saying he did the right thing in that moment. And no matter how many wrong decisions you've made, it's okay to make a right one, even if it's one out of 2000. because that one right one could be the one decision

that changes your life or saves your life that's it would you respond to a guy in your DM would you go out with somebody in your DM? Would I? You have.

I have. I know you have. I have. We wanted a nice date actually. Okay. He was a fine young he was younger than me too. Then boy.

Okay, I'm back. Yeah, it was nice. We wanted a nice date. Just one time that was it? We went on one date, because I'm busy, he's busy. No, it don't matter. B's are busy. People can find time when it's something they want to find time.

That's what you just told me. Did she just tell me that? Thank you. Your friend and your son told me, that's what you just told me. Yeah, no, we just, he was in season. Oh, you're like athletes, huh? Still do, because you told me you like athletes when you were younger. My ex-fiancee is a retired basketball player.

Uh-huh. So, I mean, but it's not just liking. It's, I work out, you know, I like men who work. So it's just more of an attraction. No, it's an attraction. You think the mother. No, I want to say this. What?

I don't walk into a room and say, I want an athlete. Those are the only guys I want. That's what you attract. That's what I attract. But also, that's what I'm attracted to. Exactly. Yeah. Because you think the moth want to fly into the flame?

It can't help what it's attracted to. There you go. So I am attracted to athletic men. Yeah, they work out. He probably could pick me up and I can't think he can pick me up. However, you know what I liked about my ex-fiancee was that he was retired? Because I like time with my man. And so there have been, you know, men who have attempted to date me who are still in season.

And I could be supportive in that, but that's a lot of time that's taken away from us. You know, for a woman like me, and I'm also busy. So anyways, the young man was great. We still talk. We're still good friends. We're still good friends because it was something very short-lived and casual.

But yes. It's something that can be, you know. I think he's too young for me, not in number, but in mindset. Sweet guy, but just too young for your mindset. But you did work publicly with Ray J. Right? I do.

You did? How was the Ray? I still do. I love Ray. Yeah. We've had Ray J. I had Reg J on the show. I know.

Why do you say it like that? Because Ray's my guy. Like, I, me, Ray, I love Ray. Ray. Ray has been with me for a long time. And Ray is just a person who is who he is. Yes. Right?

And that comes with a lot of misunderstanding. Yes. But I always say this, and I've said it to, you know, just people and even my assistant and best friend here that when you build a relationship with Ray, you start. to get a clear understanding why the people who love him, love him, because he's just that genuine of a person. And with whatever tactics he has and that he does, raise a type of man that when you are his person, like meaning someone he loves as a friend or family or me being his, his psychologist, doctor, he's loyal. And that man, he will turn a table over for you.

Ray will move a mountain for you, and it's because he loves so hard, honestly, and because he's so into that, I feel like sometimes the way that he shows it comes out very different than folks want to see it, and I just think that's what it boils down to. So, you know, I just love Ray. I have nothing but love for him. Where are you on pre-nups? You go over to pre-nup? Me giving it or me signing it? Both. You got that said you want to protect. I'm Stefan Curry, and this is gentleman's cut. I think what makes gentlemen.

Gentleman's Cut different is me being a part of, you know, developing the profile of this beautiful finished product. With every sip, you get a little something different. Visit gentlemen's cut bourbon.com or your nearest Total Wines or Bevmo. This message is intended for audiences 21 and older. Gentleman's Cut Bourbon, Boone County, Kentucky. For more on Gentleman's Cut Bourbon, please visit gentlemen's cut bourbon.com. Please enjoy responsibly. Hey there, Dr. Jesse Mills here.

I'm the director of the men's clinic at UCLA Health. And I want to tell you about my new podcast called The Mailroom. And I'm Jordan, the show's producer. And like a lot of guys, I haven't been to the doctor in many years. I'll be asking the questions we probably should be asking, but aren't. Because guys usually don't go to the doctor unless a piece of their face is hanging off or they've broken a bone. Depends which bone. Well, that's true.

Every week, we're breaking down the unique world of men's health, from testosterone and fitness to diets and fertility and things that happen in the bedroom. You mean sleep? Yeah, something like that, Jordan. We'll talk science without the jargon and get you real answers to the stuff you actually wonder about. It's going to be fun, whether you're 27, 97, or somewhere in between. Men's Health is about more than six packs and supplements. It's about energy, confidence, and connection. We don't just want you to live longer.

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And even harder to understand. Donald Trump's trade war, 2.0, is only accelerating the process of de-dollarization, which in a way is jargon for people turning away from the dollar. That is where the big take from Bloomberg podcast comes in, to connect the dot. How unusual is a deal like this? Unprecedented. Every weekday afternoon, we dive deep into one big global business story. The biggest story of the reaction of the oil market to the conflict in the Middle East is one of what has not happened.

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IHeart Radio. We are back with fresh chaos. Our latest episode features Tony Hawk, Rico Nasty, Yamanika Saunders, and Derek Beckles. Here's a fraction of what happened. This is your worst injury in your career, correct? It's the most traumatic in terms of danger factor and life-threatening, yes. What were the injuries? Fractured skull, broken thumb, fractured pelvis. Look at your thumb.

Yeah, it changed my signature. I can tell if I signed stuff before or after that. You got help insurance? I do. I'm not explicitly putting down what I'm doing on insurance form. Listen to bombing with Eric Andre on the Iheart radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast. I'm not signing a pre-nup.

You're not? No. Now, will I have one drafted? Maybe. But I'm not signing one. Why? Well, why would I? I mean, I just think, look, even before I had, I should tell my homeboys, I say, y'all got a pre-nup.

They say, shop, we ain't got nothing. I say, so when you leave, you keep all your nothing. You don't want half of you're nothing. So, I mean, look, I get it. If we get to a relationship, okay? I got X. We get to this relationship and I get Y, Z. Okay, I'm cool with that.

But you're not fin to get X. I had X before I met you. So a pre-nup that would be appropriate for me would be a pre-nup that lines out. If I stepped out and performed infidelity, this is the amount that would be paid out. and it's not going to be pennies. Okay. If we were to divorce amicably, right? Which I don't believe in that.

Right. So I'm never leaving unless, like the Bible says, two things that are permissible to leave, which is infidelity and unfaithfulness. That's it, right? Otherwise, I'm not leaving. So we're going to work through everything else. I go to death. Mm-mm.

Well, death do your part, but you still married in the covenant, you know? Oh, okay. But so if the prenut said, if we were to divorce, then, like you said, right, there's X, Y, and Z. Okay, Doc, you get Y and Z. You know, and maybe not X, but Y and Z is something that we could split. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. We're not splitting. No, no, no.

I'm not splitting. Oh, hello. I'm talking about on the pre-nup, you're going to be lining out what exactly goes to me being your wife. Right. For sticking by your ass, submitting love and making love, not denying, and pouring into you because I'm going to give you everything I got. I'm going to flip this whole table for you. Everything? Everything?

Okay. And I'm not going to say no, unless I don't. don't have the bandwidth for it. Then it's just that I don't have the capacity. Right. So in that pre-up, you're going to draw out if I cheat. Right. This is the amount that you get. And it's going to be a large-ass amount so that my heartbreak don't also feel broken in my pockets.

One, number two, if you got X, Y, and Z, it's going to be lined out that, let's just say X is $20 million of a property. I don't mind if you say, hey, then Doc gets $10 million of this one. And then of Z, Doc going to get her $7 million. But it's going to be lined out. clear on what I'm agreeing to. There will be no pre-nep that says, if we divorce, you get nothing. We don't marry. I'm not signing up for that.

That is, to me, a woman who would sign up for that, I just feel like, it's not that she's in it for love. I feel like she's been misguided. Okay. And again, I had a father. So my dad would turn in his grave if I signed up for that. And he would turn in his grave if I didn't get a pre-nup. So I would have a pre-nup that said, hey, baby, you know, this is my stuff.

And I couldn't see a man who is a man's man like you said you are, like my father was, who would have a problem with signing a prenum with me that said, I built all this. This is mine. I just don't see a man's man wanting that from me or from a woman, per se. I just don't see that. I see now a different kind of man, you know, maybe saying I want, but no, I wouldn't even marry that type of guy. When you see these, you let me know what you think. I think like when you date publicly, you married publicly and you outward with your relationship,

When it ends you know it's going to be public. We see Cardi being offset. We see I think Candy Burris just filed from a divorce and, you know, it's starting to make its round. Where are you on public dating, public marriage? I mean, I just think there's a lot of things that can be handled if it wasn't so public. Like if we get into, you know, something might have happened. We might can handle it behind the scenes. But, but. Once he gets out into this public sphere, everybody got an opinion. You're listening. Your family's listening. He's listening. His family, his homeboy, your home girls. It's hard to put that thing back together, dog. Yeah.

So I don't believe in public for myself until we're locked in married. Right. Or maybe possibly even ringing my finger, but I want to say Mary. I've dated. I've been single, I say, meaning not out of my last engagement that I called off my wedding for like nine, nine issues. years. I don't want to time's down, but it's been some years. But in between that, I have dated, you know, I have dated public figures like myself. And we, one thing I pride myself on is I do a really great job of keeping myself private. Yeah. Nobody knows who I dated. The gentleman that I brought up, that I said, you know him well. He is an extremely high profile and a public figure. And we weren't hiding it, but we just weren't being public with it. Right. Right. And so, And so we went to restaurants and went out and people screamed his name or my name. And it just was what it was.

And somebody would have got a photo. We didn't care. But I do a good job of being private. I think that the privacy piece is needed because to your point, you know, had I been public with everyone I'm dating, then I would have been having to delete or explain, you know, multiple relationships when really nothing is serious, in my opinion, if you're in a season of dating or even in a season of dating. or even in a season of being committed as boyfriend and girlfriend. Until you are married with the covenant of God, I feel like there really isn't anything that you should allow people to be privy on. Right.

Because you have a relationship, but to me you really don't have any substance of value yet until you enter into that next covenant. So for me, nobody will be ever public on my page or on my platform until it is my husband. And I haven't really had people to have an issue with them. You got some people that kind of feel like, why are you hiding me? And I explain it's not the hiding.

It's one, the field I'm in. And two, the last person on my page was my fiancé with the ring on my finger. Until then, I'm not doing it. What about you? Do you don't, I mean, well. There you go. I mean, do you go, I mean, have you been public? No.

With nobody. So you, so to the public, you've never had a woman. No. which calls which leads to speculation i have well we we know that you have you have you have done sexual things with women oh lord have we heard no dog come on dog we still we i need another year give me one more year no i'm talking about we heard i'm saying i've done another year from that that's been a year ago so we two years you got to get two years grace you can't yeah statute of limitations still on it okay okay oh so we didn't hear nothing nothing nothing shit bad strokes was good okay okay

I was like, I was like, another guy that's been in the media a lot lately is Brian McKnight in the situation. I guess he went on, he went on somebody's pod and said some things about Mark Lamont Hill. Mark Lamont Hill, fireback, says, I've interviewed you several times and you were, you know, you weren't nasty to me, but you were nasty of people on the set, so forth and so on. And then I guess, what did he do? He had a son, Brian McKnight, Jr. But he had another son recently. named him and then took the son's name. So it's supposed to be like, he's Brian McKnight Senior. He had a Brian McNight Jr. So he named his son, Brian, gave him a middle name

and then took the name from the son. But for what? What was the point? That's what people tried to figure out. What was the benefit of that? I guess he's really trying to remove himself from the past. I mean, you know, he was talking about his sons, and that he's done all he could do.

I don't know. It's just maybe you need to talk to him. So wait, this is his biological son? Yes. That he is trying to disconnect from? They're older. I think one's like probably like almost 30. But this is his biological.

Yes. And he wants no dealings with him. I guess they had a, you know, I guess they had a falling out about something. But see, that's what I mean by some things are not privy to be public. Yeah. I think that is a conversation between a father and a son. Yeah. Because if we want to be realistic about family.

And parenting, there are some times where a parent and child can go a week or two or sometimes months without speaking because of whatever that parent may fail needs to be done based on consequences for that child to fail. I'm not saying Brian's right or wrong. But those are things that should stay private. Now, if he feels like he has to pull back because something his son has done as a parent and that is going to be for the benefit of his son, I see nothing wrong with that. But if he's doing it because he's saying, I don't want to have any type of involvement with you as my biological baby and my bloodline, I think that's something that needs to be. I think it's odd, though, that you have a junior, but then you have another son and name him and give him a different middle name than what you gave the other son, and then end up taking the new sons. Yeah, it just, I mean, it seems awful. But I also remember, we don't know people's motives, and what is in 10.

And he said he was never in love with his ex-wife, say that, I mean. But what the hell does that have to do with the child? I guess. I guess because unlike your mom and dad to say you was conceived out of love. Because I was going to say something. You know what? I also have found most of the time that that father loves that child at the level that he loves the mother of that child. And you can see the difference in those relationships.

And if y'all don't believe me, take some inventory. A lot of times when that father really loves that mother, that child, gets a different type of relationship and love from that father. It's just been proven. And it's unfortunate, but you just said to here would be midnight

that, you know, I wasn't in love with the mom and so he automatically feels some type of detachment from that child and it's showing. And it's unfortunate, right? They're not the first family. I just hate when people,

it becomes public because people are going to look at him a different way to like, you know, I just hate, I just hate when private matters become public. Yeah. And then the public makes it worse, I feel like,

because then it makes people take on a public TV personality. Yes. And you start to behave in ways that aren't even your true authentic self, right? And so it's like, and then you feel like you have to respond, which you don't. Right. Because it's known with business. Correct. You know, especially when it comes to kids and family.

Yeah. You don't owe anybody. An explanation. In explanation. When it comes to your child. You still want to have kids, Doc? I do. I am.

How many? Now listen It was four A while ago I think I'm maybe down to two Because if I can do two ends If I could do Don't knock on my door

That's a clock That's a clock ticket What you wait on? Oh you don't I don't want to be a I don't want to get a person But you froze yet I'm still bleeding

And I'm not in paramedipose Oh my goodness I'm not in pari menopause My period comes No you couldn't No you couldn't My menstrual comes Every 28 days

On time On time No, you couldn't just say You know what Yeah, I froze my eggs Shannon On time That thing

Like clockwork on Like that Like that again Like Like that On time Ain't no perimenopause Over here

Ain't nothing dried up But how long are you willing To wait Doc Look Look So I said Earlier this year

That I was now My choosing stage And so I literally said, okay, I'm now going to choose because, you know, I liked my space and my season of like building my career coming out of calling off my wedding. And I was very honest with guys. I never said, you know, manipulated and was like, oh, we date and to get married. No, I was very honest about, you know, we're dating spending time, but this is what I'm focused on. Right. And that focus paid off.

And so I am now in a place that I told myself when I was a younger woman, I want to be here before I do that. Right. And you're here now. I'm here now. And it's the thing. I'm not saying this from a place of bragging or trying to, from arrogance, but from a place of humility. I think if more men and women map out their life, life is going to life. Now, they ain't going to come out perfect.

But if you say I want to reach these milestones before I do this, I feel like you have a better chance and better odds of success at family and at career and business versus just letting life give you whatever crumbs it gives you because it's already given the people like me who are asking and curating what they want. we won't. So you get the crumbs that we said no to. Right. Don't do that. But now, you know, it's only been probably about six months since I said, okay, God, I'm ready. You know, I took my IUD out. I'm in my choosing stage. I'm ready to rock and roll. Let's choose it out.

I took it out. I took it out. The doctor, I said, show it to me. Be careful. Hey, God, be careful. She says she still have a cycle and they ain't got to be careful. It would be an excellent investment, but it can't be casual.

Be careful, God. be casual. You need to tell me to be careful because the way these men are set up, they're worse than women. A man... Oh, they try to put a baby in a woman who's successful,

especially no kids and beautiful. Shannon, you act like you ain't... You act like you stay on one house on the block. Stop acting like that. You do a man and you know men. Yes, yes, yes. It's not just broke men that do it. You got men who are well off

who go beautiful, no kids, look like she's 25. Can't wait to put one in you real quick. And a lot of times it could be the men who already have the damn kids who are saying, but you or who I want to be stuck with you. Then that keeps, that'll keep an attachment to you. Hello. And there's a one-nine to casual sex, especially now that my IUD out,

ain't nothing coming through casual, you hear me? Right. Nothing. Yeah, but I'm excited and I can't wait. And I'm hoping that it happens, you know, by next year. And I can be on tour with my little belly and happy and, or happy your eyes should say, because I'm very happy. You're happy right now.

And I think that's it, too. When you wait and you find what I call God's peace and you're real happy, people are not in competition with your desperation. They are now in competition with the healthy self of you, which means your choosing becomes a little more slim. Right. But your relationships become a lot more prosperity. Prosperous.

Prosperous. Then, you know, you choosing from a place of like, I'm young. There's a clock. But, I mean, you do look at Abraham and Sarah in the Bible. Yeah. God kept his promise. And because Sarah jumped the gun and said get Hagar, the maid pregnant, because I don't believe God to deliver his promises, Hagar got pregnant and had Abraham's first son.

And then as soon as she got pregnant, guess who got pregnant, Sarah? And Sarah told Abraham, she got to go. And Abraham said, baby, you got to go. just for Hagar the maid to come back. And now they're in a house that's now a broken home because Sarah, not Abraham, he just listened to his wife, said, baby, God's taken too long, get the maid present pregnant. And as soon as Sarah got God's promise that he never ever pulls back from and never returns void,

guess what? She wanted her gone. So you're not going to see me being a Sarah who says, let me jump the gun and take over God's timing. And then I end up choosing a man with kids or I end up jumping the gun with some other man when God said, it was probably only going to be about a six more months, baby.

It might have only been another year. But you're already in a good place. You're already happy. You can't wait on me. How many men should a woman entertain? She's not, she's eight. She ain't been locked down. How many?

One, two. Entertainment, date? Yeah. So I don't condone a woman having sex with multiple men, but I do want to say, y'all, do what you do.

You've grown. It doesn't mean I'm judging you. But as far as dating and getting to know, I think a woman should entertain as many men as she wants in the dating space. Yeah. Dating means we're going on dates. We're not exclusive.

And I'm getting to know you. And I don't know if I don't know if I like you. I don't know if I like this man yet. I think women should do now. Me, I tend to, I tend to go on dates or talk, right, to maybe one or two. But once I find that you have my attention, it's just challenging for me to not lock in with just you.

You tell, unfortunately, I'm not going to be able to. Or I just don't just, you know. You ghost it? No, you don't ghost, but people, so there's. You're starting to pull back home. Yeah, there's a different, there's a different sequence when you're not locked in, where you may talk once in a while and you kind of know what's going on or like, when I text Shannon, he, he texts back sometime.

But if it's like every day we talk and then you've got to have a conversation. Right. But I like exclusivity. So even if we're just dating and we're locking in, I like it. I like a we thing. I like an us thing. I don't like anyone outside of you or me until we decide either we not going through with this or we are.

I like, I don't like scattered energy. That feels safe for me. And then again, I'm not into casual sets. So if my spirit feels like you're not fully here, then I'm not turned on to be intimate with you, not even just sexually intimate, but intimate with our conversations or with my time. Right. is it like is it true that you terminated a pregnancy as a teen I terminated two pregnancies as a teenager

and yeah my father played a big role in that because the women I think the women I read the women wanted you to keep the children yep so does this did that Shannon did he is homework on the dog y'all this man getting a plus plus plus plus did that those pregnancies early on

Has that shaped how you think now? It has. But it wasn't because I terminated them. It was because I had a covering, which was my father, because my mother and grandmother were crying saying, and keep it. And my father was saying, not on my watch. And I leaned more with my father's choice

because nobody was forcing me with his choice. And his exact words were, you may hate me now, but you thank me later. And when I got in college, I think my sophomore year, I called, and I said, Daddy, thank you, and he said, for what? And I said, because you made the right decision for me. And so for me, it more shaped my trust in men who can lead because he led me into a

promised land, right? That allowed me, and I always say this, that allowed me to beat the odds. Didn't mean the odds didn't come against me because they did. It allowed me to beat the odds. It allowed me to not be a statistic. It doesn't mean women who have kids already or who, who kept yours and didn't terminate, that you're bad because you're a statistic. But if we're going to speak real, you are a statistic if you are a little girl from the hood and you end up pregnant as a teenager.

That's called teenage pregnancy. Right. And my father allowed me to beat odds that were against me. How did you, I mean, were you nervous, were you not nervous to tell your father that you were pregnant? I feel like he, because you hit the apple in his eye. and his little girl that he adores that he loves so much is expecting.

And it's not the first, not the, you know, the one time, okay, baby, that's an accident, accident can happen, but then it happened again. Were you, were you afraid to tell it? Were you ashamed? What was some of the emotions that you felt as a teenager? I love that question. So my parents and my father in particular, he's not a, a shame you type of father. Okay, okay.

He's a very, if you love me, I'll love you more. If you're honest with me, you'll get more out of me. And so I knew he wouldn't be ashamed of me, but I did know that he was going to keep it 100% real with me. And I knew that what he's seen was me becoming a product of him and my mother and me becoming a product of the woman that he made a product of him, which is a baby mom and a baby daddy. And because he knew the pain, the heartbreak that those women experienced, he couldn't see his little girl having that same experience. And so for him, again, he was crucifying who he was to tee up what was best for me. And that is what a parent does. That is what a great father does.

And I got to go a little further. Not only did he say this is the decision that you need to make, but he was the first along my parents. face or the last face I seen walking in to termination and they were the first faces I seen walking out and my dad took me to eat after and he baby how do you feel? Are you okay? You know, what's the plan moving forward? So he didn't just tell me the decision. He was there with me. He walked you through everything.

He held my hand through it and when I walked out I got to see that man's face and I asked could the boyfriend because it was my boyfriend. Yeah, that's what I'm going to say. Did you tell him? Did he have the boyfriend knew. I asked, could he come? Because we were in a relationship. This wasn't a plan. We were together all through, like, for years. My dad said, do you want him, dad?

I said, well, then, no, I guess you can't come. But I had to give that to my dad. I mean, he's, he was a father. Like, he's not trying to be next to this dude who is even touching his daughter's body. Yeah, yeah. It's one thing to think about it, but now you and I got to see you here. I already know what he's been doing. Yeah.

And my dad, again, we had an open relationship. where I can talk to him about anything. And so his support in that is what allows me to be the submissive, loving, trusting woman of you men. And that's why I don't have a, you know, I'm not going to submit to you. What can you do for me? It's, I love submitting to you. And that comes from a little girl who had a father who submitted to me. Right.

And through his submission to me, he taught me the value, right, and the beauty of submission. And had he not did that as a man, I probably would have used submission differently. And he also would have me do acts for him, like make his plate or make his drink that taught me how to submit to a man. And when his drink got low, I would watch, as a little girl would watch, and I would be like, Daddy, you want more? And he'd be like, yeah, baby, go in and get me some more. And I knew two ice cubes. I knew how much jack and how much Coke. I knew when his plate got low on food, it was a re-up or a throwaway.

There's just things. I knew when he was emotionally not in the way. the right place. And he taught me because being a man in my presence, I knew how to say, Daddy, it's okay if it's financial. Like, we'll be all right. Or is there something you need me to do? So this is why men are so important, man, just in women's life and in their boys' life, because he taught me how to navigate through a man's emotions. He taught me how to identify when those emotions are off-kilter. And he also taught me what he needed to be said as a daughter. And so when my fiance had an issue, my last one, and he just sitting on the couch

with ESPN and the top ten planes, you know, he's... Yeah, over and over. I sat on the couch right here, literally, and he said, and I sat here, and I just put my hand on him. I said, and he just, he ain't look at me. I said, baby, I don't know what it is, but I want you to know, whatever it is, even if it's financial, I'm not leaving you, and I love you, and we're getting through it. And he was looking how you looking, and I'm sitting here, he did this, and tears. just wrote by in that moment I was a product of my father

a product of my father teaching me what a man needs when women don't get that we don't know how to navigate that and a woman who doesn't get that can easily take that as that man as disconnected from her

and she could start to ask him ego-centric questions like what's wrong with you what did I do why are you not telling me why aren't you talking to me I knew in that moment there was nothing that man wanted to say

to me or anybody right he was having moment. And all I needed to do was reassure him that I'm not going nowhere. You're not going to lose your woman and whatever else you just lost. And whatever I have to do, I am going to rise to that occasion to make sure that we are good. That's why that man felt so good about taking care of me. That right there, because he knew the value of who we had. How different do you believe your life would have been had you not terminated those pregnancies? Would Chey and Bryant be sitting right here today

With all these advanced degrees With all this popularity and fame and all this money Would you have been the same person? I would have been a different woman Yes But I would have still went and got that shit Because I'm built like that I may have even went and got more

I'm just saying because I had two little ones to feet But I will say this I would have married much earlier Yeah because I would have took one for the team And I would have made sure that my babies had a home that was complete. And so who I would have married, it wouldn't have been the teenage boyfriends,

because teenage boyfriends don't laugh. You'd have done had your photo. That's for sure. Yeah. You'd have been five or six. That's the thing. It would have forced me to make a decision quicker than I wanted to.

Yes. And I would have chose what was best for them. For right then, instead of the long. And not for me. This is where I tell women the leverage of waiting is and the power is right now I am in the pit of my power not in my biological clock because I am choosing for me and obviously for my babies secondary who are not here yet right but I'm choosing a husband with just me right and that's it and I can choose to be a mother

or not to at any point of time right that's power and I'm now choosing from a place of wisdom not just experience forget accolades and degrees I'm choosing from a place of my healthy me from a place of being a woman who has experienced relationships

and my husband now gets to get a grown ass woman who's processed through her stuff and still got a lot more because there ain't nobody perfect not a little girl who's trying to figure out

who the hell she is and where does she land those are two different people right two different people now would I still wear his ass out if need me yes

but the little girl would have told him a whole new one. Right. You don't want her. Right. You don't want her. What about sex and arguments, sex after arguments? Yeah, no. So, again, I keep saying the disclaimer just because it's for me personally, all right?

Ladies, I want you out of casual sex all you want for the grown folks. Sex after an argument and we're together. Yeah. It needs to happen as quick as it can. Because I'm a love bug. So I don't like to be disconnected for. from you. I don't want to be in a negative space with you. No, you try to, you try to make me feel, you try to forget, make me forget what we

argued about. That's fine too. But I just need, I need you to love me how? Like this. Okay? Like that. Like that. So if we arguing, we like this, right? Yeah, yeah. You want to be up close. No, I need, I need skin to skin. I want you in my skin. Let me tell you something. You see that zipper you got? Yes. I'm a type of woman. I want you to unzip it. I want to hop in it. And know what I want you to do? Zip it up. And I'll be in there just like this.

And then when we have to depart, I didn't say want to, have to. You can unzip it. Not for a shower, because you can get in with me. We're not talking about me doing things like that. No, y'all water be too hot.

Y'all be cooking lobster and crab in our hot-ass water. And I'm even talking about just an intimate shot. I'm not talking about we have to do all the do. Just get in the shower. No, no, no, no, no, I'm at the back. It's cold back there. See, that's your selfish ass. Look at your selfish ass.

See? Look at you. Stand in the cold for a minute because your woman want a damn shower, Shannon. Take one for the team. Or switch. Okay. And then when we get out, we cuddle. Damn, what I was thinking about, though.

Cuddling comes with the lovemaking you're talking about. Yes. Yes. But you have to start involving your heart. Okay. I'm going to do that. So that it ain't just sexual. Yeah.

See, mm-mm-mm-do-that. You ain't ready yet. We need more sessions. We need more sessions. Did you see that study that came out? Sex before work leads to better productivity. I agree with that. I think that I could see that.

That means morning sex for the most people. Yeah, that's exactly what that mean. Now, I will say is this, women, I'm going to advocate for y'all, okay? I got you. I've been listening. This ain't just for me, but it's for y'all. If y'all can roll over, assume the position, get it in, do your thing, and get up out. More women would say yes.

Not every woman, which I am this woman, I don't mind the full act of sex in the morning, right? Because I am a sexual person who I'm with. Right. So I like the act. Right. It's not just that. But a lot of women are like, I got to go to work too, buddy. So can you roll over, not expect me to do a full production and get your shit?

That's why you're laughing. A quinky. You look quickie, huh? Most women do. Y'all like quinkies. Most women, I'm saying. No, they don't keep talking. Mm-hmm.

Nope. I thought, well, who's why? that Missie Allen said, I don't want no one minute, one minute? Well, it's going to take you more than one minute to roll over and do your name. Nine, not in the morning. Oh, but there you go. See, then you'll be the perfect match for a lot of women. Because when I'm in session, most of my wives are saying, I don't mind it in the morning, but I got work too, and he's taken too long.

Now, the women who are saying... Start earlier. The women, they don't want to work early because that sleep is what they need, because they got to go to work and come on and also be mothers and be a wife to your ass. So there has to be some type of compassion for the fact that. that I'm already letting you have it. I got the kid this afternoon. Can you? Shit, please.

That's what y'all say. Then y'all fall asleep and we have to feed their asses because you're coming up short. The biggest difference between Dr. Cheyenne Bryant and a 20s and a 40th. I'm Stefan Curry and this is gentleman's cut. I think what makes the gentleman's cut different is me being a part of developing the profile of this beautiful finished product. With every sip, you get a little something different. a little something different visit gentlemen's cut bourbon.com or your nearest total wines or bevmo this message is intended for audiences 21 and older gentlemen's cut bourbon boon county kentucky

for more on gentlemen's cut bourbon please visit gentlemen's cut bourbon.com please enjoy responsibly hey there dr jesse mills here i'm the director of the men's clinic at ucla health and i want to tell you about my new podcast called the mailroom and i'm jordan the show's producer and like a lot of guys I haven't been to the doctor in many years. I'll be asking the questions we probably should be asking, but aren't. Because guys usually don't go to the doctor unless a piece of their face is hanging off or they've broken a bone. Depends which bone. Well, that's true.

Every week, we're breaking down the unique world of men's health, from testosterone and fitness to diets and fertility and things that happen in the bedroom. You mean sleep? Yeah, something like that, Jordan. We'll talk science without the jargon and get you real answers to the stuff you actually wonder about. It's going to be fun, whether you're 27, 97, or somewhere in between. Men's health is about more than six packs and supplements. It's about energy, confidence, and connection. We don't just want you to live longer. We want you to live better. So check out the mailroom on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your favorite shows.

Podcasters, it's time to get the recognition you deserve. The IHeart Podcast Awards are coming back in 2026. Got a mic? Then you've got a show. Shot. Every year, we celebrate the most creative, compelling, and game-changing voices in podcasting. Is that you? Submit now at iHeartPodcastawards.com for a chance to be honored on the biggest stage in the industry. Deadline December 7th. This is your chance. Let's celebrate the power of podcasting and your place in it. Enter now at iHeartPodcastawards.com. The Big Take podcast from Bloomberg News dives deep into one big global business story every weekday. A shutdown means we don't get the data, but it also means for President Trump that there's no chance of bad news on the labor market.

What does a bacon, egg, and cheese sandwich, reveal about the economy? Our breakfast foods are consistent consumer staples, and so they sort of become outsize indicators of inflation. What's behind Elon Musk's trillion dollar payout? There's a sort of concerted effort to message that Musk is coming back. He's putting politics aside. He's left the White House. And what can the PCE tell you that the CPI can't? CPI tries to measure out-of-pocket costs that consumers are paying for things,

whereas the PCE index that the Fed targets is a little bit broader of a measure. Listen to the big take from Bloomberg News every weekday afternoon on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, it's me, Ergondra, bombing with Erigandre, and Will Ferrell's Big Money players and the I Heart Radio. We are back with fresh chaos. Our latest episode features Tony Hawk, Rico Nasty, Yamanika Saunders, and Derek Beckles.

Here's a fraction of what happened. This is your worst injury in your career, correct? It's the most traumatic in terms of danger factor and life-threatening, yes. What were the injuries? Fracture skull, broken thumb, fractured pelvis. Look at your phone. Yeah, it changed my signature. I can tell if I signed stuff before or after that.

You got help insurance? I do. I'm not explicitly putting down what I'm doing on insurance forms. Listen to bombing with Eric Andre on the Iheart radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast. Bombing with Eric Andre. Ooh. I knew you was going to come with a good question. You sound good.

You're too good at what you do. 20-0, Shyam. Straight shooter. I can see that. Still are, though. Yeah, I'm about to tell you different. Straight shooter. But probably bullets flying at everybody.

Mm-hmm. Right? 40-0. Cheyenne straight shooter knows her target. 20-0 Cheyenne outspoken because she has a message that she wants to land, and she's not really considerate or compassion about who it lands. on, or how it lands, I should say. Forty-old Cheyenne aware and very calculated on her message, the delivery, and how it impacts you, because I want to make sure the impact is coming from my true intention.

Wow. 20-0 Cheyenne was a lot more conservative than I am at 40. You think I'm big on no casual sex now. I was very relational, but I also had a fiancee my whole time. time, right? And I was less emotionally regulated than. So I could be a lot more fiery and dominant in my relationships. And in my 20s, my submission hadn't peaked yet. Right. And then my 30s was when I was with my ex-fiancee who took care of me and my submission fully peaked. And so in my 40s, I am very emotionally regulated. My emotion intelligence is extremely high. And I, I,

I am, you know, extremely submissive. And it's not submissive because I'm waiting for you to create an environment. It's I'm submissive because that's who I am internally, innately as a woman, right? And so it's nothing you can do to make me not submit. It's just if I can't submit with you, I probably won't choose you. Wow. Because I got to be with who I can be soft and submit to. Right.

And so lastly, the 20-0 Cheyenne, I was a nest. I was a nest. And that's probably why I ended up with the guy who made money but wasn't a breadwinner, because I was the nests. And equally yoked means he can't be the nests too. Now I'm a nester. So I am nesting in you. And it's not that I'm waiting to see if you're a nest. I'm nesting in you because that's just my position.

Now, if you consume that role or not, it's up to you. But I'm nesting in you. And it's soft and it's safe. And lastly, one thing that's in common, though, 20-year-old shine and 40-year-old shine was never looking for a safe space. I already knew very early on that I was at safe space. And so I bring that with me everywhere I go. And so, yes, I want you to add to that, right? And don't attempt to dismantle it because it's mine so you can't.

But I don't need you to come in and I'm sitting here in fear until you create this space that I can nest in. That's not how it works at my age. Now, the man that's going to make a home, create a family, same age, a little younger, a little older. Because I don't, because I want a man who doesn't have children yet, he would probably need to be about my age or younger. But I haven't had a problem with meeting men with no kids. I always say people, people's limited thinking is what gets in their way. Right. And so if you think there are no men with no kids, then you're right.

I happen to know that I'm not looking for men with kids. I'm not polyamorous. I only need one. And if anyone is going to tell me that one man. There ain't one man that dude's world. But no kids who does well and he's a great human. Between the ages of 38 and 45. That's only 38 and 45.

That's what you're looking for. Get the fuck about here. Yeah, that's crazy. That's like saying one person ain't going to buy or ain't going to like this. That's crazy. We know you're looking for a lot, but we're talking about one. So, yeah, and I don't mind even like 35, 36. as long as the maturity is there.

Yeah. You know, because I've learned, you know, a lot of these younger men in that 35-ish range, even a little younger than 30, they are a lot more matured than a lot of these men who are 45 and up. Yeah. They're not stuck in their ways. Yeah. They are very flexible. They open doors.

They know how to date. They are actually hunters like men used to be. Yeah. They're calling. They're texting. They're love bugs. They want to get married. They're all in the old school.

We're the old guard. We're the hunters. And let me say this, not only women, but men in their 30s are the new generation that don't have baby mamas. You'd be surprised at how not thirsty for sex and women these younger men are, meaning like they are literally saying if we can't date or if we can't have some type of out of the bear romance, I'm turned off. There's so many young men here are like, women are just throwing the pussy at me. versus back of the day was men were the you know

were chasing the cat and that's a turn on for me and you have the older men who are just kind of like look it's kind of like you're saying I'm working

I'm doing me what you see is what you get and I definitely want the intimacy as far as sex with you but I'm not sure if I can commit I'm not sure if my old ways will allow me to

to you know to maneuver or to transform into what's needed for a relationship and your finding studies have shown the older ways

woman and younger guy is having the higher success rate when it comes to a healthy marriage and happiness. I beg your pardon? The older women and younger man. They're finding that that success rate has actually outdid the older man and younger women. Oh, really? And think about it, Shannon, though, the older, us older women, we actually keep

ourselves up a lot better than the generation of older women did prior to us, right? And so we are working out. I mean, of course, there's other augmentations that can be done. I'm not knocking nobody that women are willing to do. The self-care is there. Women are taking care of their skin. It's just, it's a whole other world for women right now in the sense of how they keep themselves up. And so there is no competition for us when it comes to young women because we really are those women.

Like that 35 to 45, and I've even seen women at 55, I'm like, sis, what are you doing? And Tracy Ellis is one of them Most of the women Who are gorgeous and still doing their thing And have that glow They ain't been married And they don't have no kids I'm just saying

We're out here glowing Yeah, there's a lot of y'all like that Not stressed out Very sexual, very happy, very loving Very rich Very well taken care of Dating No, having our way, very happy.

Yeah. And I'm not saying that there's not happy marriages because there are. Yeah, for sure. But when you choose from that place, you calibrate like-minded, like vibrational energy. You're less likely to get somebody who is not happy, who's not healthy. You repel a man who's out there womanizing and doing certain things because that man also knows he can't sustain that quality of women. Do you think men are lonely? I think men and women are lonely.

I think both are. I think that, again, we are in an over-sexualized culture right now. And sex satisfies the flesh like it's been doing you. It doesn't satisfy the heart. Our satisfaction comes from the heart. The heart already knows what you want. Half of us just are too afraid to let it have that because we don't know how to navigate it at the mind, intellectual space.

but the heart is saying but that right there is going to make me fully complete fully satisfied so yeah I think people are just lonely I think because folks are operating from this transactional space and everything is transactional

is either sex or a bag or prostitution or not and there's no relational things happening and I think relational experiences is what really makes the heart full Michelle Obama Former First Lady Michelle Obama

Said America's not ready for a woman president just yet So get out my face Do you think America's ready for a woman's president I don't think it matters what America's ready for America thought they're ready for Trump And obviously we were very unprepared and ready

For this type of leadership I think what America needs Is a little younger leadership I'm saying 20 or 30 I'm just saying younger than like Biden or Trump, right? Even if it's the 40 to 50-ish range, it could be male or a female. To Bill Clinton is younger than both of the last presidents, and he was president 25 years ago. Right.

And Obama was one of our youngest presidents. Yes. And so, but I think for the right woman, yes. And it could not be Michelle, but I love Michelle. But I think that what we do need is a change in leadership, and a woman would be a great change in leadership. And I do think that a woman leading doesn't mean that the leadership will be soft or the leadership will be less led. I think that for the first time in history, that leadership will be different than what we had. And if there is any time but now where we need different, this is the time.

Well, at this current time, anybody can be president. There's not a political office that you can't hold. No matter whether you think you're qualified, whether you're black, whether you're black, whether whatever your political affiliation is, what we've seen is that. Let me ask you this. Because I've always, because she's caught a lot of criticism online.

And I want to hear your expertise on what she's trying to say, Aisha Curry, because when she says that, man, I didn't really see myself as a wife. I was like, in his career, I'm going to be this entrepreneur, I'm going to be this.

I don't think she's saying she didn't want, she don't want to be married. She's upset that she married Steph Curry and has this beautiful family. family, but what can you do from what she's trying to say? What I heard, which is exactly what you said, nothing more or less, and I just heard her, I heard her being a woman with the voice. And it's kind of when you said, how come women can have preference, but men can't, right,

from your experience in the world. And I can see that. I don't believe that to be true for me, but I can see that perspective of societally with the constructs. When a woman speaks out against the societal norms, of a woman being domesticated or being a wife or being a mama, then she sounds ungrateful for having this wonderful husband who's providing and taking care of her

because that is most woman's dream, right? But there are other women like myself, right, and probably her too, from what she said, that their dreams are not limited to a position of a wife or mother and to just being this person's wife. And where I do understand her is that I told God earlier on my years, I said, God, I would love to marry a man of affluence and a man who does well.

But I don't want to be known as, let's just say Shannon's wife. I want to be known as like, this is Shannon Sharp. And you know, this is Bryant hyphenated Sharp. Oh, you're going to keep your last? Oh, so you will hyphenate the last.

You know, I mean, I've already built this thing. Okay. I was just checking. And this is his wife. And people go, oh, I know exactly who you are. You're the one that produced. Or you're the doctor next to you. Or if I introduce myself,

oh, that's Shannon. He's a Hall of Famer. Like, you did your thing. We love your show. Yeah. Power Couple. Right. And so I see her saying that she wanted to have what he had the luxury of having. He has a wonderful career and he has a wonderful family. She has a wonderful family. How come she gets deemed for saying, but I want to have the same equality as my husband. All I'm saying is love being a mom and wife because she's obviously doing a damn good job. Yes. Yes. Kids are great. But how come I can't also want...

Why can I have both? He has both. Why can't I? Why I got to be relegated to? And he has both because she sat at home and allowed him to build one. Right. And she built the other that she is allowing him to also take credit for. Right.

Because we know he'd been on the road. Not that he ain't been a great father. I love Steph Curry. But what she's saying is I should be able to, now that my kids are of age, the kids look kind of grown to me, go create what I want. And she did try. She started doing magazines in the past and covers. I think she got cooked wear.

Yeah, she tried. And so I think there's nothing wrong with her saying, look, I have aspirations too. And I'm not going to take away from what I've already been excelling at, but I'm also excellent at other things. We had two young men, black men, Karen Lacey and Marchand Mila. And we kind of briefly touched on it, not those guys specifically, but mental health in the black community. Do you think there were signs that these young men were dealing with something? It comes to find out, I think the police in Louisiana said something about he caused an accident that caused someone in his life. And the report's about he was about to get indicted and it was just overwhelming.

Neeland just had scored his first touchdown on the Monday night game. And then all of a sudden his girlfriend is calling frantically saying he's going to end it. He's going to end it. what is what with the black athletes and mental health because I think now more guys are getting more black let's speak to that because this is our community are starting to get in touch with their emotions starting to get in touch not as much as not more probably more need to but we are starting to see that shift where black men are not so rigid like man I don't need it I'm fine I can I can my daddy didn't do it my grandfather didn't do it what what do you think caused the shift And how can we prevent the Marshawn Neelan in the Karin Lacey's situation? You said something really, really, really primal. You said that back in the day black men would just pretty much shove their emotions down, right? And they would not allow them to come up.

So they didn't have to see them or face them, which means they didn't have to feel them. Right. The suicide rate was way lower than. The suicide rate is high now because you just said black men are getting more in contact with what? Their emotions. that emotion that's tied to trauma that emotion that is tied to pain and when that comes up they have to fill it and they have to face it and when there's no place to dump it or place it then they eat it and it internalizes anything that we internalize at some point is going to

externalize in some form of action whether it's them ending up in jail because they beat the shit somebody, domestic violence, which is a big one in sport, especially NFL, or suicide, unfortunately, right, or deep depression. And so I think that what needs to happen is what I am so, so honored to be able to provide, like I said, with the Steelers and the Browns, with the players, a safe space where I am allowing them to not just feel what they feel, but externalize it. And I'm holding space for that. And I'm helping them feel it and understand what those emotions are and also teaching them what to do with those emotions. For example, one of the young players has some emotions around his family using him. And there's some addiction involved in different stuff, right, within his parents. And he has a lot of emotions behind that about him being used.

But he also has emotions behind him saying no because guilt comes in, right? because there's a sense of, in the black community, entitlement. I'm supposed to take care of my family, no matter even if they didn't help me or do for me. Otherwise, I'm looked at as what? The sellout or the dude who didn't do nothing for no one. And so he's dealing with the duality of I'm being used and it feels horrible, right, to be taken advantage of by my parents

who did nothing for me, but I feel guilty when I say no. So what I mean by helping him is helping him identify those emotions and then teaching him how to set boundaries that help him regulate his emotions see boundaries are not for people they're for us and they are emotional regulators which says look mom dad i'm going to give you this amount a month that's all you get after that him and i are still working on what the guilt that comes from when they ask for more him saying no no that may sound like a small problem to people but to your point that small problem to us puts that boy in a dark space of depression and if we don't see that sign

as big because it's small to us, that suicidal ideation can turn into the act of suicide. And depression turns into suicidal ideation. And so my job, and I feel like it should be all of our jobs. I mean, every human, because mental health is a human, right, not just a one race or gender, right? But especially within our black community

is what I said earlier on. The check-ins need to be deeper than just, you good? When you know they're not good. Right. Stop asking people that. What's going on with you? Talk to me.

or talk to somebody else I'm not leaving until you talk no I'm gonna sit here until you express something I'm gonna call you I'm on my way well let's take a drive well let's go have coffee let's go have tea

let's watch a movie right those things have to be where we show more care and compassion I have to do it with the guys them guys sit in there and a lot of them are just like

you can tell it's at the tip of their tongue and I'm still pushing and pushing and poking I even sometimes appropriately confront them and say things that are completely

rude enough that I know we'll trigger them. Because if I can trigger the emotion to come out, then we got it to be externalized. I just needed to come out. You needed to come out. And I need you to know it's okay. So we have to start creating safer spaces for our loved ones. And loved ones don't mean someone you live in a house without all you love. I'm talking about you see someone on the street and just a loving person that looks like us. The check-ins should be there. When I see a man get off the plane with a cane and he's a black order man, I have waited next to him until his wheelchair came and said, I'm going to wait with you, and he goes, you are, but that's just me checking in with this older black man, because you're here with nobody.

So I am responsible as a black woman to sit here and make sure you are cared for, because I'm going to take on that responsibility. And that little waiting for him made that man's whole year. He kept looking at me, and he goes, you're just an angel. No, I'm a human that's trying to do shit right. Right. And I respect my elders, and I would want someone to do it from my father or my grandfather or my husband, so I'm going to do it for you.

So we have to do them check-ins. You said, were there signs? There's always signs. And I'm not blaming the loved ones, I promise, I'm not. But we do have to be accountable because I'm telling you, we see signs. We are too busy to get involved. Or they've been the same thing he'd been doing for the past four or five years. He'd been doing that since he was 13.

But he's been dark since he was 13. Right. And you've been doing the same thing. You've been doing since he's been 13, just letting it do what it does, letting them get back on the football field. And you know, because you play ball, a lot of these kids, especially these black kids, I'm learning from working with the NFL so close now from a mental health expert standpoint, the black boys don't have supportive families.

They have entitled families. You're not saying you had an entitled family, but you had a family that you took out of poverty, so you get it. Am I saying they're entitled? went back and still gave it to them as though it was your duty and I'm not saying it wasn't but you did that like it was your duty these black young men Chador is an anomaly yeah he is an anomaly a very blessed young man to have that okay yes yeah those boys don't have that and I'm calling them boys because they are they 20s they 22 they think like boys they make a decision like

they don't have that support and the NFL needs to do a better job which they are Thank you for having me be a part of your doing better job with mental health, of having the me's in there and the ones that look like me in there to help these young men. Because, see, I represent more than just Dr. Bryant to them. I'm black and I'm woman. I represent a mama who they never had. I represent their mama who using them right now. I represent sometimes the mama who abused them. I represent the mother who they despise, who they are resistant toward.

And when they get a different experience of me being a black woman, it changes everything in them. And the way I'm able to love on them, the way I'm able to pour into them and not judge, but hold space for them is what they need. If you would have seen their reaction, let me tell you this, the session was so vulnerable, Shannon, that the director had to stop them and say, dot, got to go. I didn't. I would have stayed out. I love what I do. But some of the dudes was getting out their chair and walking out. Like, not walking a door, but get up like, yo, I just did.

One guy walked up and said, yo, this is not her talking. This is spirit talking. Like as though it took him to church. That showed how his spirit was moved in that session. Those young men not only need it, but they deserve it at the level that they are playing in that league. and the fact that the league is starting to care more or at least the staff that's working for the league

is saying, yo, I'm working close especially the player development directors. Those are the ones. You know, shout out to Ron and D.Y. Them dudes are changing lives in there. And they're working next to these players and they're seeing the hardships of these players. They're annoying when someone's grieving

because their mom just died. Right. And they're coming in there. And all they can do is perform because football is performative. Yeah. It's performative. And then you got family who wants you to perform, too, with your money.

So that's how you end up breeding men like you, who's just performative and transactional and ain't got no space for the heart. Love you to death, but we don't want a gang of Shannon Sharps running around from that capacity. The shit you do that's good here, we do. But from the place of being disconnected from yourself as a man or the heart space, we don't want that because then we don't get husbands. Right. We don't get, I'm not saying you're not a good father, but we don't get fully engulfs involved fathers.

We don't get families. We don't get the real wealth. We get detachment. We get transactional. We get someone who can perform. And so because all you can do is that, all you want to do is be able to perform in my body. And that ain't good enough. And now what I love about our sisters are we're saying we're not going to settle for that.

Right. So y'all got to come better, which is, I believe, also what has caused y'all. you have to become more vulnerable and get in contact with your emotions because we are now holding y'all to a higher standard in saying that although we love and go have y'all back we need more than just performance

from you. We need more than just y'all taking care of us and paying the bills. We need you present. We need your pain. We need your trauma. And we are strong enough and big enough black women to hold space, facilitate them like we've been doing this entire time and we will continue to do it.

And y'all have to just allow us to do it. But I can say this. The emotions that these black men are now coming in contact with and not having a place to dump it is causing depression. Because what do you do with emotions that you don't understand and that you didn't see your father process? He didn't show you how to process them because to your point, he shoved him. Right. But you're feeling him. And so even if you went to him, what does he tell you?

Suck that shit up. Or I just kept pushing, son. This what you did. Work, son. Work. Catch a ball. Just slide through, stick and move, son. Don't commit.

It's safe in the transactional world. It's not safe over there, son. Because if you don't tell him that, he's still going to see it. So it's learned behavior either way. And so there is a gap. And I'll wrap on it, there's a gap between the men who are men's men. I love that your age range are just man's man. That's sexy and itself.

But y'all have no emotional attachment or intelligence or heart space. It's like, yo, hello. So there's a gap between y'all and the younger generation. Right. And how you both process emotions. Absolutely. Y'all see them, am I saying you at the minute?

Y'all see them as soft sometimes. And they see y'all's old and stuck in your ways and don't know nothing and just stern. And there's that in between of who is teaching them when they don't know because they've never done it. how to process their emotions. So it doesn't become a mental health illness. And we don't continue to have these beautiful young men like these two men who had a hell of a day one day.

And then all of a sudden, it's dark. It's the worst day of your life. And you cannot tell me that that happened within that most time frame. It did not. There was conversations that that that girlfriend heard. There was things that were said. And oftentimes, loved ones don't know how to respond because you also don't want to take the wrong action.

and trigger it. Right. So it's sometimes a hard position for everybody, but the best thing you can do is to get that person help, whether it's calling the police to do a wellness check, and that is so hard because in our black community, we don't do what? We ain't calling no police.

Or make a doctor's appointment and say, hey, he just needs a wellness check. You can call the school that they're at, the school psychologist. If it's school, if it's college, you can even call up to the NFL and say, yo, I think something's going on, do a wellness check. They have psychiatrists and therapists that are on site that are supposed to be working for what they pay them to do.

This is your first book, correct? So that's my first book I wrote in 2014. It's called Mental Detox. Yeah, and it did so well that Hay House, Random House, my publisher, the biggest team publishing company in the world. Shout out to Hay House. They picked that book up in addition to my new book and said, you know what, we want to redo that and add a workbook component to it because it has been so. so life-changing and it, I self-published and it sold, it just sold, I mean, literally sold off the shelves as a self-pubbisher. So they picked it up. I added a workbook component

and we added more new information to it because I'm 2025. I'm a new woman. I got, you know, new tools. And yeah. You said 50 cent. 50 cent helped you. La La, Anthony wrote the preface. Yeah. The forward. Excuse me. She wrote the forward. what is what can we expect for people that haven't read it what is mental detox it is it teaches you how to detox your mind of negative thinking of your three-part house how you think how you feel how you behave and those things that don't serve you that have only been putting you in positions that breed results that you don't want right so when we do things with an intention of what we want and we reach a different goal that's called out of alignment manifestation doesn't make place in that space of disalignment and so it talks about that it talks about the lover's garden, how you show up emotionally within yourself so that you can actually connect, confuse with somebody else. It talks about professional garden. So we use a garden metaphor in there, the professional garden of how you show up at work and how it impacts you, how you can optimize yourself by making sure that your thoughts and your mind and your mental health is impaired and

not having impairments. And so we talk about all that. And we cover, I mean, everything from how you process your emotions, emotion intelligence, you bring about what you think about. You have domination over your thoughts all you have to do is possess it a lot of us are letting our thoughts dominate us and our mind is here to serve us and we are serving it and how do you allow your mind to serve you like it's supposed to as a man think it so is he we said that earlier and so we have to be very aware of what we're thinking and you work backwards right um what do i want to be how do i want to show up then what thoughts do i need to think so that those that person is curated. Another thing the Bible says, you can tell a tree by the fruit that it bears.

Right? And so I talk about, well, we first have to figure out what fruit we want to bear. People are trying to figure out what tree they want to be or what seed to plant. It's like, wait a minute. Well, how do you know what seeds are plant if you don't know the fruit you want to bear? Right. That's where exposure to environments is important. That's where choosing someone with wisdom and not experience is important because if I'm hearing your wisdom and it's getting me what I like, then I understand this is the fruit that I got to try to bear. Then I can understand what kind of tree I need to become. What kind of seeds? Your thoughts are your seeds? Do I need to plant? And so as I realize these are the thoughts I need to plant because there's seeds,

I can water and become this tree and I can become the fruits of my labor. And that's exactly what it teaches you in that book. And these are all principles that I've used and I still use on myself and my clients and so they've been proven to work and yeah the book has been going crazy I'm really excited about that book congratulations

I saw you at the Browns camp you cut a pass from my Ashdora I did you have leg I said look at Doc I had a little trot but look I made it all the way

you took your heels off took my heels off yes your door was getting fussy he was like go run I was like hold on I'm trying to I'm trying to get in position he said girl just run I said

like I told him I said going to throw me one of them Colorado passes. But that was before he had the good game with the ratings when he threw that long 55-yard pass. I said, Shador, throw me one of them good Colorado passes. He's like, you crazy, Doc. I said, everyone does. Yeah. Go get a book. New book is out. Mental Detox. Dr. Shian, Brian. Doc, thank you so much. Thank you. I appreciate you. Thank you for having me. I've been grinding on my life. All my life.

Been grinding on my life. Sacrifice. Pustle paid the price. Want to slice. Got the bowl of dice. That's why all my life. I've been grinding on my life. I'm Stefan Curry, and this is gentleman's cut.

I think what makes gentlemen's cut different is me being a part of, you know, developing the profile of this beautiful finished product. With every sip, you get a little something different. something different. Visit gentleman's cut bourbon.com or your nearest total wines or Bevmo. This message is intended for audiences 21 and older. Gentleman's Cut Bourbon, Boone County, Kentucky. For more on Gentleman's Cut Bourbon, please visit gentlemen's cut bourbon.

Please enjoy responsibly. Hey there, Dr. Jesse Mills here. I'm the director of the men's clinic at UCLA, and I want to tell you about my new podcast called The Mailroom. And I'm Jordan, the show's producer. And like most guys, I haven't been to the doctor in way too long. I'll be asking the questions we probably should be asking, but aren't. Every week, we're breaking down the world of men's health from testosterone and fitness to diets and fertility.

We'll talk science without the jargon and get your real answers to the stuff you actually wonder about. So check out the mailroom on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your favorite shows. Podcasters, it's time to get the recognition you deserve. The IHeart Podcast Awards are coming back in 2026. Got a mic? Then you've got a shot. Every year, we celebrate the most creative, compelling, and game-changing voices in podcasting. Is that you?

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I broke my rib, and I was late to pick up my son at preschool. Wow. Our latest episode features Tony Hawk, RICO Nasty, Yamanika Saunders, and Derek Beckles. Listen to bombing with Eric Andre on the Iheart radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast. Bombing, with Eric Andre. Hey, everybody, Daniel Jeremiah here. And I'm Bucky Brooks. On Move the Six, we take you inside the game from breaking down college prospects and NFL

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