Club Shay Shay - Fashion and drama from Miami Swim week and Garbielle Union’s one strike rule | Humble Baddies

Episode Date: June 3, 2025

Sharelle and Alexis discuss all the fashion and drama from Miami Swim week, Gabrielle Union’s one strike rule, & Vic Mensa opens up about his depression as a black man and much more!08:48 - Miami Swim Week16:35 - Cardi B & Stefon Diggs23:21 - Gabrielle Union30:55 - Vic Mensa on depression44:30 - Humble Baddies Questions from Fans47:49 - Humble Baddies Mail(Timestamps may vary based on advertisements.) #ClubSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is an iHeart podcast. What's up? Hey, Max Boo. Hi. It's Trisha Rose. You need a skincare. I think at this point, you just need to come out with your own skincare line.

No, the glow is glowing. It's really water. It's happiness. It's... Don't tell him. Don't tell him. You know, I might have to drop something, you know. You might have to drop something, Felix. How have you been? I have been... Do you hear my voice? It's kind of a little... It's a little off. Um, I've been in the kitchen at Smith and Webster

on the weekends. And I mean, I'm overwhelmed. It's in such a great way from running the line of being a prep cook as well as getting to know everyone's energy. So it's becoming familiar to me now. And just being in the kitchen, I'm just feeling about passion. So I'm just like living it up, but I'm like yelling at the staff

and like telling the orders up. And it just was a long, long weekend. We have dinner on Friday nights and Saturday nights. And then brunch. She's always the brunch. Yeah, the brunch is on Sundays and it's a vibe too. So it's just been packed. It's been overwhelming, but it's been great at the same time.

I'm happy. My mother and my aunt came by on Friday night and celebrated her 82nd birthday. So that was fun. The fact that they got to see me and before she left to St. Louis, she got to see me in my element. So it was a proud moment and full circle moment because now I could like nourish them and give them food. So it's great, you know?

And then my house is quiet. My children are away for the summer and I'm just like, don't know what to do with this new found peace. So I'm just low key just enjoying that and adjusting to it and happy and grateful. So here I am. What about you? I know that's right. I'm just living my best life. Spirit free. I've just been enjoying life. I'm traveling and I'm about to get ready,

getting my costume, my outfit together for the Beyoncé concert in Paris. When is that? On my hit Juneteenth. So I'm actually gonna go, she's gonna perform on Juneteenth. And then, you know, while I'm there, I may go to the South of France. You should. You know, enjoy the beautiful life. Yeah, you should.

You know, this is the time to be traveling, you know what I mean? Like the summertime. And very much, I feel like Miami's kinda like a, it's not as busy as it is, because everyone's done with school and everyone leaves. Everyone is like, oh, we're in Italy. We're in the south of France and all of that. So we definitely, yeah.

I know, man, she's taking her second trip, you know, she just graduated college, so she's taking her second trip alone with her friends. It's gonna be a graduation trip, so... She's about eight years old. I'm like, now is the time to live and then I'll have to, you know, get her every... We're gonna throw her a trump party and send her off to college. That's amazing.

So, be excited. Be great. Call for it. I was like, I'm big sis now. They... I was like, don't call me big sis. I love that. I love that. I do want to mention, I do want to real quick, I do want to mention, um, I was in the culinary space.

The at Smith and Webster, they do a great job of incorporating the students of Job Corps. And unfortunately, it was my last weekend with two young students who depended on this program that unfortunately had to dissipate due to the new administration. There was no funding. So a lot of students that are underprivileged and also wanted just to have a path in a professional field are now being forced to leave. They don't know where to go. They live there. They were bused there, just very much given the opportunity. And so many professionals use Job Corps. If they didn't have that, then they would have been stuck in these impoverished communities and very much stuck in the system. So I just want to send out a shout out to

the two students that were there. I just wanted to wish you guys good luck. And it's unfortunate that it's a lot of students, a lot of kids between the ages of 16 and 24 that are now affected. So, it sucks. So I just wanted to give a shout out and give them some glory real quick. Aw, that was sweet. Like, it does suck, you know... Terrible. ...how they spend their money and how they budget

and how they just cut everything that means something. Like, we're putting money towards irrelevant crap right now. But I do have a program since we're talking about that. But my program has veterans. So with the Lord Realty, if you're a veteran and you're stationed out of Florida, they have a program that's called the Bridge Program where basically you're transitioning it if you want to get into, let's say, real estate or be your own entrepreneur. I have allowed military personnel who are transitioning from the military into

civilian life to come shout on me. So I still have that program. No, I don't get paid for it, but it's just something to give back to support and help veterans because it's hard, you know, being in the military and that's all you know, and coming back into the civilian life, like it's hard to adapt back into that, or even get into that civilian life because like me, that's all I knew.

You know, I went from high school straight into the military world, and that's all I depended on. So, um, I did start, I signed up to help, uh, military personnel is transitioning from being a soldier back into the civilian. That's how, if you're in the Bay Area, Area, a little real tea welcomes you. I love your internet. You know, it's each one's each one, and it takes a village for sure.

So, yeah. Yeah. Definitely does. Well, let's get into it. I'm glad everything's going good. When I'm in Miami, I have to come check you out. Let's sexy legs. The only thing I regret with Smith,

and I remember I used to go there a while back and the grits, they wasn't like your regular Southern grits. They used, they still use them. They use a Georgia grit. And like, it's like, it's been in that pot for a couple hours and it's just, they're delicious. Wait, they must change shit because they ain't used to use the Southern grits no more. They, I mean, um, they used to use a different type of grit.

It wasn't like this one. Yeah. So I have this one, nice and creamy, you know, yeah. Okay. I'm gonna have to go check it out. All right. Since we're talking about it, let's get into Swim Week. I was watching and the girls were killing it.

The recap of, were they on 10? The baddies, were they on 10? So did you check out any of the shows, Lex? Unfortunately, I was not. I was doing the runway in the kitchen, in the back of the restaurant. Okay, okay. But I did see a few highlights, you know, other than that.

I was watching and the girls were serving. I loved it. The walk, some of the girls needed some work on their walk. But their bodies were on point. I'm like, oof. You know, the way I do follow up is a few of the girlfriends that we follow, like, shout out to Bunny and... Bunny, listen.

Oh, yeah, yeah. You know what I mean? I was about to see Swim Week through them too. Yeah, she shut it down. I was just, it was her, her whole Instagram was a movie for me the whole weekend. Because I was excited to see all her looks. Like, she was serving, the waltz was her, her whole Instagram was a movie for me the whole weekend. Because I was excited to see all her looks. Like, she was serving, the waltz was there,

her husband, Peaky Sweats, was there supporting her. I was like, girl, you are killing it. Yeah, well, shut up. It's a big deal here in Miami, you know? Um, I didn't know that until I ended up going to support friends over the summer. But it's a big deal. Miami is popping. It's always something going on in Miami. I know that there's different fashion weeks around the United States in different times,

but swimwear in Miami is different. You have the beach. It's usually great weather. So it's that last you know, it's that last little cusp of entertainment before everyone kind of starts to relocate for the summer. So I love that. Yeah. Shout out to the life. My biggest highlight was Jordan. When Jordan was walking the room, her swimsuit on, she did a front flip and kept strolling.

I was like, girl, you better walk it. I think she had the best walkway, and she was the highlight over the weekend of Swim Week. So shout out to our girl Jordan, for tossing up and being an athlete into the whole fashion space. She is our comedy of the week. I love that. You know, as she should, use the runway. We saw her on the main stage of the USA,

well, representing the USA in the Olympics. And so we are just cheering for her all the time. And she is a baddie. I love seeing the different... Speaking of that, I love seeing the different standards of beauty. And she's a shorter girl and very strong and just her thighs and just beautiful in her own way. And so like, I love the fact that we can see a plethora of bodies, your body type,

because everyone, you know, we live in swimming suits out here. It's basically where our island's at, and everyone has a swimsuit, and everyone's confident from around the world. So, I love that she did her front flip. I mean, we get to see her do it in her element, and, like, she upped it a little bit

because not everybody can do that, you know, the straight line. You gotta have a little price to it. You have to. A little piece that's Jordan to swim with. Yes, I love it. price to it. Yeah, you got to. A little price that's Jordan to Smumweed. Yeah, there is. I love it. I love it. Would you rather slay the wrong way or... or not? Would you, like, would you, at today's age, would you give it a stroll?

Yeah, why not? I'm actually the most confident I've ever been in my life. I wish, I tell my girls all the time, embrace their bodies because, you know, gravity takes over and age does too. But I would definitely represent for the baddies of my body type and very much like strut my stuff. Depends on the type of swimming suit though, you know, like when we on the islands and we're away, the thong will come out, you know what I mean?

But that's not for the runway, you know what I'm saying? I don't know if that's gonna happen for me. I mean, if we all sexy legs, because you got that body girl. No, not for the runway, but I definitely... You know, the beach way, when it's like the girls trip, or, you know, couple, just myself and a guy, then that'll happen.

That'll come out. But other than that, I would probably do like a high waisted situation and just strip my stuff for sure. What about you? I definitely would. You know, I have a walk. The walk has always been there and I feel like, um..., I have a walk. The walk has always been there, and I feel like I'm... You got a walk.

Yeah. So you could give me that walk, but I am stage frightened. So, I don't know, I would have to drink. You? I am shy. You? Like, in real life. I am sexy licks. Like, I'm really shy in real life. Like, oh my God.

With the cameras and everything, if I can look past that. But people actually looking at me and all eyes are on me, I do not like that. Well, you could definitely shut the wrong way. Like, come on now. I know you could. I could get on with a little sexy walk. Yeah. Are you kind of in a certain type of...

I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I know you could... I think I don't want a little sexy walk. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Are you coming in a certain type of swimming suit over another or it's just whatever for you? Because you're like, I don't care. I'm seeing you, sis. Like... Yes, I have been working out, been getting rid of the backpack. But I hate my tats, too. So, if I could go back and remove that, I would. But, yeah, I would probably rock both, either or. Yeah. I guess the standard of beauty is a whole spectrum now, which I love.

You know what I mean? Tall, short, wide, skinny, you know, whatever the case may be, I'd love to see it. So we can to see it. We can definitely. We got the energy. Shout out to the ladies who was killing it during swim week. Yeah, we talking about them. Gave them suits and all this. Now our girl Cardi was showing out on the boat with Stefan Diggs.

Yes, yes. But it was a lot of going back and forth between Stefan and Offset. And Cardi and her soon to be ex-husband too. It's just a lot of feelings, a lot of emotions and she was wearing that swimsuit, baby. She was definitely wearing the swimsuit, but it was a lot of emotions, and she was wearing that swimsuit, baby. She was definitely wearing the swimsuit, but it was a lot of controversy. People were supporting her because allegedly she came out and officially announced her

as Stefan Diggs by the post that they put on, and offset as Stefan was throwing shots back and forth, subliminal calls back and forth. My question is, because I was looking, I know people support, but I don't know, I just feel different. I want better for Cardi. Cardi is a mom now and I feel like, you know, she went from one relationship to another, and Stefan does not have the best reputation when it comes to women. And a lot of his exes and women that he dealt with are saying, you know, you went from one dog to another one, and maybe he's worse.

So it's like, I've been different about it. One, people can't help when they meet each other. You know what I'm saying? I believe in divine timing. I also believe in like following your heart and just being happy. I don't, we don't know the, I feel like we also put too much pressure on everyone. One, with the soft launch and now that now we are expecting them to do X, Y, and Z and then or hard lunch or whatever. So it's like, I low key want to stay out of people's businesses because I'm just like, look, you know, it's too much. In one week, they'll be this way, and the next week, we don't know.

And so it's just like, it's tough because when you're public figures, people want to speculate. They want to speculate. They want the best for you too, and then they're going to also chime in on your relationship, your status, who you with, and all that kind of stuff. So it's added pressure. So I think whatever is making her happy, get through this time because divorce is not easy.

And now you have children, you have businesses, things you've built together as a marriage. But at the same time, you've got to move on too, you know? But I feel like that's the problem. Us as women, we go through, we always, we move on too quickly, not saying that she did, but we think that, you know, because you found somebody that temporarily makes you happy, you're in a good place, but all you're doing is just putting the band-aid over the wound. You're in that cycle. I was in that space at one time and I had to learn, like, I can't continue to depend or find a man

to continue to make me happy. And you go to the same cycle, finding that same type of man. It's like, you just keep on repeating the same steps over and over and over again. Yeah, yeah. And it's very hard to transition too, like, when you go from a breakup, like, being with someone for so long, learning them, understanding them, planning with them, to a sudden breakup, and now you're, like, trying to figure out, like, assets and time and whatever

the case may be. It's definitely hard. It's traumatic. And you get triggered from anything like red flags or something, traumas and triggers that have happened in that past relationship, you also don't want to bring it into your new situation, your new friendship or your new partnership with someone. So it is definitely a healing space. Marriage is one of the hardest things in the world to do. And the fact that they even tried for love, you know, it failed, which happens obviously all the time. But the fact that she's willing to give, like, give it again,

like, you know, just really be a woman that wants to love and be loved, and they're having fun, you know what I mean? Like, I guess, what is it, six months or something like that, that they've been together, whatever. I mean, you got kids, you get older. But that's the beautiful thing is this too. Like, I mean, I've been told no one's gonna want me, you know, with four kids and...

But it's not even, it's not even them. It's just like, where are your kids? And you know, where are the, there's just people are trampling in on so much. What do you think? What do you say? They shouldn't worry about, I'm sure, Cardi is a great mom. It's not that like, where worry-a-kiss.

It's more, like... Heal yourself first and then find someone that... You can't keep going, repeating the same cycle. I mean, this man was just on a boat with you and other women calling him daddy. It's not a good look. I mean, it's not a great look, but we also don't know their bedroom situation,

what their thing is. I mean, obviously like, you know, I really don't, you know, I don't, I hate, that's the one thing I don't like to do is be in people's bedrooms with them. So we don't know what their preferences are and what they're into, but she's having fun. And so is he, you know what I mean? That it's just, it's summer, it's their lives.

And... I guess it's hot girls also by any means necessary. You're gonna do whatever it takes to make it look good. And I agree, you do need a heal from her situation and, you know, just before you get into anything else. Because that's not fair for the new partner. That's not, you know, take the time to build a friendship and really get to know somebody. And really know yourself too,

because your morning, you are grieving, you are, you know, adjusting and... Arnie is a Libra girl. She's a lover girl. Libras are lovers. Yes. No matter how much we say, you know, F this, I ain't trying to be in no more relationships no more.

I'm done. We fall in love. We are not it to just be outside. Like, that's not what Libra... We want to be locked down. Like, we want to be locked down. And our whole mindset, we think that, oh, we can change somebody. This that in the third. Oh, they gonna fall in love with me.

And you gonna end up getting your feelings hurt. We all been there. Yeah. Oh, I'm praying for my girl Cardi, you know, have your fun, but don't, don't lock it. I think it's like a, you think it's like a rebound. I think she just going through her stages right now. I hope and pray she just going through her stages right now. I hope and pray she just going through her stages and it's nothing serious.

Okay, well that's that. But I'm happy that she's happy. Same here. But I want Cardi to find real true love. I just want her to be at peace. And make some more music. Maybe this is inspiration. Our girl, Gabrielle Union, she did a podcast and she was basically saying that she has a one strike rule.

Like, now at this age, stage of life, I don't have time for the bull crap. Like you got one time to irritate me and you're deleted and blocked. How do you feel about that, Leigh? I agree with her 100%. I am learning the power of know what is worth my time, what is not worth my time, who values me, and who really wants to really, who do I want in my space and to disturb this peace in a roundabout way?

So yeah, bye. If you're not adding value on this journey with me, then you don't need to be here with me. One time is enough. If you are rude, if you are not irritable, if you're just very much not for my growth, I will 100% not need to have that conversation with you. It's sacred to be in your space. It's sacred to be in your, just your life in general. And not everybody's meant to be there in the longterm.

So I'm okay with letting people go, whether that's family, whether it's business, whether it's anything. I'm definitely one of those ones. I will give you, if you're doing something very disrespectful, then we just, we have no ties. I actually just don't have to see you. I don't want to be in your presence.

You're going to see me, you know, in the past then, but we don't have to be in that, be around each other in that capacity and you don't get this energy anymore. So I'm all for it. And yeah. What about you? I kind of disagree because I mean, sometimes we have bad moves and we're in, we could be thinking that, you know, any and everything irritates us. So somebody can catch us on a bad day where it's not even their fault and they're just irritating. And we sometimes,

you know, when we're in those type moves, we take our stress and we don't even look at it from, it's just anything can aggravate them. So I don't look at it like that. You really have to do something to a point where it's just, it crosses one of my boundaries where it's like, okay, I'm gonna cut you off. But I am always open no matter how old I am

to giving people a chance. But there's boundaries that are set. Yeah, she said, I'm at an age where if you irritate me, she ain't playing no games. You like, I'm at that age. And time is precious. And, you know, again, in your space, in your bubble, who you allowing your home, who do you show up for, who do you spend time with? Time is valuable and we definitely take it for granted.

And I'm not, you know, you show up for those who show up for you, you're gonna pull up and you're gonna be there for those people. We don't have time for the people who want to see us fail and negative and heavy energy. I don't know. It's not my house for me. Yeah. Yeah, it's not noticeable. Yeah. Yeah. It's non-adulcible. Yeah.

Before I could get ran over, you know, people would take advantage of that kindness and then they start planning your face and we don't have time for that anymore. Not at all. I do have a little room for grace, but I am all about protecting my peace. My peace is my number one priority. You have a little room for grace, but I am all about protecting my peace.

Peace is my number one priority. So I mean, for me, like I said, it's boundaries. How many chances should you give someone before they're blocked for good? Blocked for good? Because you're not a block body. And then we'll block them. Okay Okay, I block them. Let me I I love to I love I I'm a little I'm passive petty. That's what us Pisces are Where I'll meet you

That way I don't have to have like, you know, I don't have to have dings or alerts about you But I want you to see what's going on to over here that shit don't have to have deans or alerts about you, but I want you to see what's going on too, over here, that shit don't stop. So, it might be me blocking you, so we're not having communication, but I definitely won't block you so you can see what's going on over here. Because, you know, I just, we have a good time.

We're gonna keep it moving. And have some memories and you get to miss out on it. So I'm kind of like in that space of it. How many times? It does take a little bit for me. I'll just kind of start backing off and weaning off of you. But you would have to do something on my list of disrespect for me to just be like, nah, this ain't worth it. You know what I mean?

Because I love the fact that you can hit a little button and make all that disappear. Yeah. Yeah, because at home... I'm Eric Petty. I hit a, you know, when the bubbles are typing. Blah, blah, blah. Because what you about to say in the green... Yeah.

Ha, ha, ha. That's how petty I get. Because what you about to say is not great. That's how petty I get, baby. You're not about to write me no whole book. Yeah. And how I'm like, you don't like the book? Mm-mm. Nope. And then five minutes after you send what you sent, because it's not going to come once I'm blocking it and you hit send, you're going to have to resend it.

I'll take, I'll have mine in my notes and say everything I need to say, cut you out, unblock you, send it, and block you back. So you don't even, that's, that's very toxic. You don't even want to hear what they got to say. You want the final word. The last word. Okay. And I said that and I'm standing on business. Right.

Block. That's the old Sherelle though. I don't have to deal with those issues anymore. Your filter is better. I have. So now you can go on there, right? That's the lesson learned. We're not. We're not.

Good. I like the growth. I actually love the growth, Sherelle. The growth has been amazing. Don't you see me glowing? Yeah, we have to grow and we have to, you know, accept criticism and feedback. That way that gets us better, you know? And so we do better, we know better, we do better. Yes, I see. I had so much...

I had, from my friends to my counterparts, my business partners, we had talks and talks. And I was like, oh my goodness. I was, I'm glad y'all, I'm glad y'all held me accountable. Like y'all coming to me and telling me how I was to get me back. Now your girl is on a mission, nonstop. You know, that's what you're supposed to do is surround yourself with the right people. You know, consistently. Because Misery Loves Company, you know, we's what you're supposed to do, is surround yourself with the right people, you know? That's true. Consistently, because Misery Loves Company,

you know, we've had this conversation to where they will definitely bring you down if someone's down, someone is not in a hilled space. Yeah, we don't have time for that. Yeah. That's why it's very important. That's why I was saying with Karlie, it's very important because you, being in toxic relationships, you become such a different person.

You miss out on so many opportunities. You don't even put yourself first anymore. It's like you're not who, you're not your real self. Because you're going... Yeah, it changes you. Exactly. Very. So. Very. So, I just think that, you know, I have friends who are accountable partners

that make sure I'm good. That makes you good. All right, let's get into it. Mimsa's, is that how you say his name? Mimsa? I believe so. I don't know. Rock. So he did a podcast with Jason Lee, and he spoke about a lot of things. What really, you know, caught my attention was, um,

his depression as a Black man, and not only as a Black man, as a child. Like, he, at five years old, he knew something wasn't right with him. That's amazing awareness. He opened up about suicide. Like he was having suicidal thoughts at five years old. Being a black man in America and how society worsened his mental health.

We're gonna talk about the stigma around black men discussing mental health. I think we spoke about this a few times before, but it's very, you know, I think we should continue to speak on it and make it a safe space, especially for our black men to open up and talk about, because they hold so much in.

Like, I'm always talking to my boys, like, talk to me, tell me what's going on. It's okay to let it out, like cry it out. It's okay to show emotions. It's okay to open up. But he basically spoke about his suicidal thoughts and, you know, five years old about to commit suicide. At five, like, how do you know just going through so much at five years old? Yeah, it's a lot that we don't know that goes on in these households. You know, there's

a lot of depression. It's a lot of undiagnosed people that are in your household and in and out. There's a lot of heavy energy. There's poverty. There is no food. There's abuse. There's so many things you can name. And I just wanna give a shout out to, it's actually June is Men's Mental Health Awareness Month. So we're actually, this is a great time

in that we're speaking on this. But the fact that these men are being vulnerable and breaking the cycle and the generational curses, especially in our communities, of speaking out and being very honest about it, to me is very masculine, is very sexy, that people are saying, you know what, this is who I am, this is how I felt and I'm to fix it. And then speaking on it so you can help others. It's really each one teach one. And the fact that these men can be vulnerable enough to express their feelings and communicate

really does help us as a community, in marriages, as partnerships, in business, and really rearing our next generations of youth. To see your parents go to therapy, to see your parents talk about things, to see everyone in your household be open about their dialogue of just what's going on in their minds and their hearts and their brains. There's a lot of energy around us.

There's pressure at school, there's pressure on the fields and on the basketball courts. It's pressure to maintain certain lifestyle and keep up with the Joneses and all these things. So the fact that we are breaking, even we're just more aware, you know, our generation is very open-minded to learning and we are affording therapy and we're also knowing how to write it off for, you know, all these things, right? Whereas now our children are just very much more open to talk about it. They're really ahead of us in a beautiful way

with technology and things that they have because they can hit AI and be private and say, AI, I'm feeling like this, you know what I mean? Or try GPT and be like, I'm feeling like this. What are some symptoms or what is this going on? And their friends are talking about it more and more and more. So I just feel like the stigma is changing.

People are getting more open about being vocal and really seeking help. So I just think it takes a community of our strong black men and us women to uplift them and also encourage them because we need that. We need to have that conversation and that dialogue that way it's okay. Like it's okay.

You have to exercise your brain just like you exercise your body. You know, you have to exercise your heart and we have to take care of our bodies. That's how you stay mindful and stay resilient in this world. Cause it's heavy, it's hard, it's war, it's losing jobs, it's so much going on, and this is stuff that has happened

over the decades and over the generations, regardless of how you were raised. So shout out to him for saying, you know, really recognizing it, and that's a sad place to be at five, that's kindergarten, that's a precious age where you like, I just don't want to go on. You know, it's- You should get thinking like you're so sad.

Yeah. I know it's heavy, but you know, fast forward to where he is now, to where he has a platform where he's like, look, these are the options. these are the ways I did it, this happened to me and let it not happen to you, or this is very much relatable. Because I feel like over time we were just embarrassed

or we rely about it or not us, or what happens in this house stays in this house was like embedded in us. And unfortunately it made like very much shell shock and very much like, you know, closed in. And so now, now it's better to talk about things like this is very therapeutic for me to have my girl time to talk about how I feel and really to help others and inspire others to like be open to like dialogue about all issues. So I think it's definitely necessary in our community

and should be talked about more. Definitely. Do you feel like Black men get the safe space they deserve? If not, who's responsible for creating that? Um, I mean... Who's responsible for creating that? Um, I mean... I do feel like, you know, Black men do deserve this,

but all men do. We, you know, men have a lot of pressure being the head of the household and being the provider as well as the protector, and have to have this hard, like, always aware, like, I'm gonna, you know, be the lion, you know, I'm gonna protect my household. So, yes, it's hard, and it's...

It's not about being weak. Yeah, yeah, and you can't be weak. You can't cry. You can't, you know, you have to be this tough shell. And, um, at the end of the day, it's a partnership. When you're raising children, when you're raising, you know, just having a partner, if you have children or not, we both need that masculine and that feminine energy to connect and really build and grow and be vulnerable as partners, you know, whatever your situation

is. So men are needed to be in that leadership role. And it's very much, it's hard because, I always think back to just like the lineage of like how we got here in the first place with slavery and how people on your level, you will look up to and very much the strength of, sold off being bigger and stronger

and split up from your families. And then turn around and then, you know, the slave owners are using your own, who once was like a brother to you is now reprimanding you, beating you and turning on you, you know, that used to be a colleague. So you look at that where it's just like over time, men, they're in the prison systems, it's hard for them to seek employment.

They just have been just beaten for like really low key centuries. And women, we were definitely in the home, caretaking and being maternal and being much nurses and your OBGYNs back in the day. So it's just like, we as a community at whole have to recognize our power. You know, I say this over and over again,

because we are a very smart group of individuals that are very talented, that have the same opportunities. And we still do not get the reparations needed and necessary for us to even, you know, to keep growing. So we just have to keep going back to our communities, giving back to our communities and reaching out to our youth because they need us the most. And so we can keep that cycle going of growth instead of just that heaviness that's been pinned on us being in the United States.

And I feel like the more we speak on it, the more we talk about it, the more we have role models of men who open up about it, the more it's gonna be... okay to speak on, to talk about. So, shut up the guys who are opening up, talking about their trauma and saying that it's okay to release it, it's okay to talk about it.

And not only is it mental health awareness, it's also PTSD. So everyone who's going through PTSD, you know, I am a, I suffer from PTSD, and it's not easy. So if it is, don't mind the awareness, I keep on getting alerts on my phone,

but make sure if you're going through something that you seek some type of therapy, some type of counseling, talk to someone, shout to someone, don't just shut down. Because when you shut down, you don't know what can happen. You deal with so much and we don't want anything bad to happen. So make sure if you're going through something, you have a bad time, just reach out to somebody,

get out and do something positive. Yes. Whether it's a mentor, whether it's a superior, a brother, someone that you can trust that really is like, look, this work for me, I feel like honesty is the best policy just because when someone sees that they're vulnerable and open and honest about a certain situation, then that does open up the flogging some more to be more open about it.

So it's about having a good support group too, of individuals that will help elevate you, not like bring you down, but will give you good sound advice so you can make the right decisions. And it took me a minute to go through therapy to go through it. I mean, I remember when, you know, my daughter, I think I told this story before, my daughter, it took my daughter to tell me, Mom, you changed for me to go seek help. Because she was like, you're not

the same mom that you were before. And I had, it was probably like six months after I came back from Afghanistan. And I was like, my child see, you know, see something different. But I was still, I was still going through it with my therapist. I would be, you don't know what they have been through. Like, why am I talking to you? Like, all you're gonna do is just give me medicine.

I don't want that. Like, you can't stop. You haven't experienced what I... Like, I had a wall built up, even with my therapist, for so long. I went, I pulled out, waited a year, went again, and I kept going until I got it right. And I did some intense therapy to help me get through things that I went through during

my whole time in the military. So it was a great experience and I still, I learned coping skills when I went through therapy. I still utilize them. I still talk to my therapist to this day. So it's great. It's great to seek help and get help. Mm-hmm. And if you feel embarrassed too, or just not ready for it,

you can, they also have now where you can chat with someone one-on-one on your phone. You know, these tele visits are very popular and very much at hand, so you can start there too. Yes. All right, now it's time to get into our questions from our humble buddy fans. We don't have that many that came in today.

Only two came in, well, three came in, but we answered the first one. Will we ever do Miami Swim Week? And if so, what swimsuit would we rock? I think we both answered that one. The next one, what something petty someone did to you that made you instantly block them? I think for me, it's always just comments on Instagram. Like, you know, Instagram is there for

entertainment purposes. It's a double-edged sword for me. So I'll block some money in a minute if they say something out of line. I'm just like, block. I don't have time for this block. Like, you know, you know me, I don't, it takes a lot for me to engage. If you being disrespectful, but like, I understand that you're behind a phone. You could be a fan or a hater. Um, and I'm not going to let that ruin, like my moment. I'm on the gram either promoting something

or just being my free self and just expressing myself creatively. I don't need that negativity. I'm just like, uh, whatever. And I don't really, like, low-key don't even read the other comments either. I was just like, if something that I happen to be seeing, and I'm just like, what? That just blocked. So maybe that's petty or not, I don't know, but I'm protecting my peace.

So it's definitely like, easy. Mm-hmm. Block, block, block. This finger's strong. Well, listen, you know, I like to have the last word. So before I block... (*LAUGHS*) You wanna f***ing sing, you never leave the stinger in. I'll wait three minutes to leave the stinger in. I'll wait three minutes to leave the stinger in.

Let it marinate. I'll wait three minutes, let it marinate a little bit, go back, block. What's the pettiest thing for you? Will it be something that's said or just like... Yeah, probably something that's said on social media. I just like it. But I gotta say that sometimes I have my clap back, let it marinate a little bit and then block because we're not about to have that.

You got to let them know. I can't catch on on social media. We're not doing that. So you are here what I have to say. I feel the wrath of the rail. I just before we go into the humble baddies, I just got a text from my girl, Kennedy. Oh, my stink state. She's my bonnest child.

That's Chad's daughter who turned 10. She said, Sherelle, can you take me to Tampa this Saturday? Oh, uh-oh. She said, I want to get away. Shout out to Snoop. Today is her birthday. So shout out to my girl. She just turned 10.

Happy birthday. She want to getop. Today is her birthday. So shout out to my girl. She just turned 10. Happy birthday. She want to get away. She said, she's like, what does she call you? What do they call you? Like, what do they say? Hello, she just say, I'm Sherelle. No, I don't allow. They have a great mother.

Just Sherelle. They very respect, you know, they're still respectful and everything. She's like, Sherelle, can you take me to Tampa this Saturday? Yeah, she want the tour, she want the full, everything. I love it. That's my girl. But, um, so happy birthday, Kennedy, we love you.

Happy birthday. Let's get into this humble baddies mail. Want me to read it? Yeah. All right, here we go. I gave her everything and she still left me. Hey, humble baddies. Hey.

I really need y'all advice because I feel like my whole world just crashed. I've been with my girl for six years. I helped her through nursing school, paid some of her tuition, got her first car in my name, and even helped take care of her mom when she was sick. I did everything a man was supposed to do. She told me she loved me every day. But the moment she graduated,

got a career and started making money, she switched up. She started talking about finding herself, needing space and wanting to experience life. Three months later, she's posting trips to Tulum with some dude that owns a gym. It's like everything we built meant nothing. The part that hurts the most, she told me I was too good and she just needed someone with some edge. Like, what does that even mean? I love her purely, I was loyal, I sacrificed, and now I'm sitting here trying to pick up the pieces while she's out living her best life like I never existed.

Ladies, I need to know, is it true that some women only stick around until they level up and then leave the man who helped them get there? Was I just a stepping stone? Should I ever trust another woman again? Signed heartbroken and used. Bam. That's sad. I feel bad for him.

That's sad. Like it shows like she was never, she was only there for you for your benefits. That's sad. I feel bad for him. That's sad. Yeah. Like it shows like she was never, she was only there for you for your benefits. From the side that, from what he's saying, it's like you did everything for this woman and she basically took advantage of you. She had it in goal. Yeah. I honestly don't think he should judge every woman

off of, you know, the decisions that she made, because every person is not like that. It sucks because she has ruined it for a lot of women, but I wouldn't judge other women based off her actions. That's so sad. I feel bad for him. I agree with you, Sherelle. I wouldn't let it hinder my dating experience going forward. It does hurt.

It is hurtful. And that lets you know in a long run, she was not for you. We see it time and time again where one partner has that growth and the other one isn't there for that, and they just, you end up splitting up. But she showed her true colors, and that's realistically what people should be praying for. Like, reveal yourself to me, be yourself to me,

so now I know how to move accordingly. So use it as a blessing in disguise. It definitely is hurtful because you love, you invested in this person You were investing in there there You saw the potential in them as a potential partner and saw that growth in them But it's time for you to focus on yourself now, you know what you're capable of I always try to use a past experience to understand who I am Where my heart lies because I don't let people hurt in my heart. I still trust I still give loyalty

I still am gonna be that lover, I'm gonna still be Alexis. And so I'm like, look, the next person's gonna get even more, even more, because it's just like, I'm growing and I'm learning about, you know, who I am and what I tolerate, my boundaries and everything, and what I wanna give to the next person. And so if this won't let me take me, I'm realizing that I'm not internalizing it,

that these things happen for me and not to me. It's a big difference. And so it's like, I'm not using what these people, I always say, the girlfriend told me that she said, you gotta let people land. And so let them show you who they are. Like that's all you need for them. We do a horrible job as humans to like try, try to fix and, and, and, you know,

like, oversee things because we're, we love, you know, we're supposed to love. But at the same time, we're not supposed to be in pain either, and love does not suppose to hurt. I feel like he was putting everything in, putting it all in. And not reciprocated. Not reciprocate anything towards him. I mean, that's a sign. When you're doing everything and trying to win that person over,

you're doing too much. That person is not for you. And that's when you need to take a step back. And it's that there's good people out there, and you get into these relationships, and they just take advantage of it. Yeah, it's hurtful. It is hurtful. And then it does spill over, you know, like, accidentally into the next situation, Yeah, like, it is hurtful. And then it does spill over, you know, like,

accidentally into the next situation, because, you know, you're triggered and you're a little covered. You're like, you're just a little more tense, and you're just like, you know, it is, it's hard. But to me, communication and transparency and being vulnerable and letting that next person know, like, look, this happened to me and I'm trying to do better. So let me know if I feel a little triggered or traumatized from this situation because

it's painful. That's money, that's time, it's investing and everything, but that lets you know that if she's doing this now, she would have done it ahead. But y'all had your time together and use it for what that is. Understand that what you're saying. I mean, my money back, girl, because you have a good life. Karma, I believe in Karma, though. Like, he was there to give, you know?

You're supposed to give from your heart, you know what I mean? And not expect anything in return. So he blessed her and let it be that he's gonna be blessed. She's gonna get it with her so-called new love life. Exactly, exactly. Because you lose them how you get them, baby. All right. Yep.

So heartbroken in yous, we wish you nothing but the best. We hope that you find, you know, someone that can reciprocate what you're doing in that relationship. And appreciate you. Exactly. All right, you guys, that is it for Humblebatties. If you guys need any inquiries, any questions, anything, y'all can hit us at contact at humblebatties.com.

Make sure you subscribe to our podcast on YouTube. Also follow us on Instagram at HumbleBaddiesPodcast. I am Shara Rosado. You can find me at SharaRosado underscore. And I'm Alexis Walsh Saddamayr. You can find me at Alexis underscore Saddamayr on Instagram. Make sure you tell everybody, tell a friend to tell a friend to follow us and subscribe to HumbleBaddiesPodcast. Until next time, we'll see you guys on Wednesday. Take care, everybody.

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