Clutterbug - Real-Life Hacks and Tips to Declutter, Organize and Clean your Home Fast - 30 Minutes to a Cleaner & Happier Home | Clutterbug Podcast # 170

Episode Date: April 25, 2023

Clean with me! In today's podcast we are spending 30 minutes cleaning our homes together! We will let go of the resentment, overcome the overwhelm, and gift ourselves a cleaner and happier home today!      You can find more Clutterbug content here: Website: http://www.clutterbug.me YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@clutterbug TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@clutterbug_me Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/clutterbug_me/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Clutterbug.Me/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today we're cleaning together. This is all about motivation, inspiration. We're getting our butts up and we're making our house better because we deserve it. Hey, Clutterbugs, welcome back to the Clutterbug podcast. I'm going to be honest with you. I'm feeling a little resentful and frustrated today. So I thought I would do this podcast because we can support each other today. Maybe you can relate. I was gone all weekend. doing a CPR and first aid course and it was legit like all day 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. I didn't get home until dinner and my kids my husband they're great they try their best but I came home to a house with dirty dishes I came home to laundry that hadn't been kept up we have a family of five and it's effort even though my house is tidy even though I have these great organizing systems in place there's day-to-day stuff that's just never freaking ending. And if we skip a day, we're always behind.

It's so frustrating. I thought about just leaving it. I thought about saying, you know what, forget it. And I'll do it tomorrow. This is tomorrow casts this problem. And this is something I used to do all the time. I used to procrastinate the tidying and the cleaning and the picking up. Because honestly, I was kind of mad about it.

Not only mad that I feel like my family, wasn't as helpful as they should, but mad at the mess in general, mad that I didn't clean it up earlier, mad that I have to do it at all. I have this inner teenager who looks at mess and just just like, I wish this wasn't my problem. Why is this my problem? How am I stuck being this grown up that has to do this? And I don't feel this all the time. I used to feel this all the time, but it still creeps up every now and then. So I wanted to do this podcast so we can clean together because here is the undeniable truth. When my house is out of control, when there's a bunch of dirty dishes in the kitchen, when the

living room's a mess, when my bedroom is a mess, I am so much more anxious. I'm stressed out. I don't sleep as well. So we're tackling it right now. And as you listen to this, get up. Let's go to the kitchen together and let's just make it. it better. We can unload the dishwasher, we can reload the dishwasher, we can hand wash dishes. We always think this is going to take so much longer than it actually is. Like I

procrastinate because I look at the kitchen when it's really messy and I'm thinking this is going to take a full hour. I don't want to do this right now and it's always a 10 minute job or less. So right now together we're going to make the kitchen better and if your kitchen's already looking amazing, let's put away some laundry, or let's make the bed, or let's declutter something. We are going to be talking today about our why. Our why this is important to get this done, not for our husbands, not for our children, not for our guests, but for us. Because I'm telling you, the state of your home directly affects your mood. It affects how you feel about yourself. And I see this not only with myself, I definitely feel this way, but with so many people that I talk to that I've helped with clients and even friends and family.

We're just like we chat about this because especially as women, it's a huge part of our life. We live in this house. It's our home. It's our nest. It catches us at the end of a long day. It's our retreat from the outside world. And it's also a reflection of ourselves. and whether we want to admit this or not, when our house is out of control, it makes us feel like our lives are out of control.

It's embarrassing, first of all, if anyone else was to see it because it's sort of like we're exposing the truth that we're just not really in control like we want to be. Like it's some sort of moral failing, which it isn't, by the way, which it isn't at all. You are still a good person, even if you can't keep your house undercum. control. The two things are not connected, but we can't help but feel bad when it's a disaster, when it's messy. And here's why. When our minds are bombarded by like a bunch of stimuli, a bunch of dishes in the sink, a bunch of clutter on our surfaces, it distracts our attention, first of all. It's stealing our focus, but it also makes it really hard to relax. Physically, mentally, even if you're sitting on the couch and you're zoning out to TV or Facebook or you're

surfing the web, it is still in your mind. It is signaling your brain that there is still work to be done and that you're not done. And you are, whether you realize it or not, feeling guilty when you're relaxing, when you're doing something for yourself and taking time for yourself, when things are messy. So we can do two things. We can do two things. We can keep on distracting ourselves and hope that that like little nagging feeling of unworthiness or self-hatred goes away or we can stand up and spend 15 minutes because here's the magical thing. We don't have to get it back to perfect to feel better.

We just have to take a few steps. We need to make it better to be able to say, okay, so it isn't perfect and it isn't done. But I worked on it today. I'm closer. I took a step. Now I can feel good. Now that doesn't feel like a to-do list or a pile that I've procrastinated to later, because I have taken action on it, it doesn't have to be perfect. We don't have to be finished, you guys.

We don't have to be finished for that guilt, that shame, that embarrassment, that like, ugh, that feeling like you're, you just, you suck. Yeah, maybe you can relate. We just need to take action a little bit. And we can tell ourselves, you know what, I'm working on it. instead of lying to ourselves that we're going to do it later, which we know it's a lie. Come on. We're not fooling anyone. We know not only are we going to keep kicking that can down the road when we say that, but it's going to be so much harder tomorrow or on the weekend because we've just continuing to pile and make it worse. So we're taking action together right now. Right before I got on this podcast, I timed myself.

it was 13 minutes and I made a huge mess in the kitchen. My husband and I made this huge dinner and the dishwasher was running at the time because I hadn't started it yet that morning. I kind of was like slacking all day. Things were a disaster. I was tired from being gone all weekend. I had let things sit. I didn't clean it up when I got back from CPR training both days. So we have days worth of mess now. And every fiber of my being was like, leave it. But I started the dishwasher before dinner. It wasn't done after dinner. And it was 13 minutes to get that kitchen back.

I hand washed all the plates and the pots and pans and the baking sheets that are crusted with stuff. So much faster than I thought. There's still a little food on the stove right now. It's kind of like hardened on there. I just put some baking soda on top. I'm going to scrub that later, but I still instantly feel so much better. I do. And so if you're listening to this and there are areas of your home that just feel like this never-ending story and you can never get on top of it, let's do something right now.

Let's stop that clutter and that mess from bombarding our minds and our souls with all. They're like attacking us constantly with you're not good enough. Why can't you get this under control? You're a disaster. So let's fight it with taking action and telling ourselves, you know what? We're doing this. We're doing a small thing. We're doing five minutes.

We're doing 10 minutes. We're making a difference in our home right now. And the biggest difference. And I know I say this all the time, but I say this because listen to me with just please with all of your being listen every time we de-own something every time we remove something from our home our life is easier that's one less thing we have to remember it's one less thing we have to stuff shuffle it's one less thing we have to move to find the thing we're looking for it's one less thing that's on our brain and in our physical space everything we own everything we own

I feel like we have to pay taxes on mentally, physically. It's not only sitting in our house taking up space, but it's sitting in our mind too. And it's a constant thing. We're like, where are those scissors? Where's those post-it notes? Where's that thing that needs to be signed? Where's that bill? But also, where's that extra freaking chopper thing I bought when I went to that home show

that I never use? Whether we realize it or not, every possession we own is somewhere in our mind. that we're trying to remember that we own it and where it is. Subconsciously, it's there. So it's time to de-own. It's time to take some pressure off ourselves. And I think that this is the biggest difference between, I look at my grandparents who their house was always tidy and it didn't feel crazy overwhelmed. But she still worked full time too and had a buttload of kids and her house was always spotless, but she had way less stuff. She had nicknames. She had nicknames. and chotchkes for sure more than I have.

But she didn't have the stuff that I have. All the Walmart junk that I tend to accumulate. The fast fashion clothes, the little gadgets here and there, a million candles, you know, random books everywhere. I just, I feel like there's this steady influx coming in our home. Gifts at Easter for my kids and Christmas and birthdays. And even when we're out, we're just constantly like treating ourselves to these little things. and it's adding up to a mental and physical load. And we can unload it right now by letting go of

the guilt and shame that comes with decluttering. And instead of thinking like, I'm wasting this, I shouldn't have bought it in the first place. Why am I just letting it go? What if I regret this? What if I need it one day? We trust ourselves that we know we don't need this thing. And we look at this as standing up for ourselves. That's, I truly feel not only decluttering, but any type of home management is standing up for ourselves. It's putting ourselves first and saying we deserve a house that is tidy, that is organized, and that is clean.

Because at the core of our home is how we feel about ourselves. And when our house is under control, we feel good. And when our house, it doesn't have to be perfect. I mean, we are not spending hours a day cleaning. Listen, I will not let you spend hours a day cleaning because you have better things to do. But we are not going to let the clutter and the mess make us feel like crap. And the easiest way to do that is to get rid of the stuff we're not using and loving and to do our dishes and to clear off the counters and the flat surfaces of clutter to pick stuff off the floor, to make our bed, to put

away laundry. Little things. We just do little active things throughout the day and we think of them as acts of love because that's exactly what we're doing. We are not just scrubbing the dishes. We are loving ourselves because tomorrow morning when you wake up to a clean kitchen, that is a gift that you've given yourself. You deserve that. When you go to bed at night, you don't have to look around at a messy bedroom, you get to peel back the covers of a made bed and crawl into those cool sheets. There is nothing better. There is nothing better. And even if you're going to bed, you know, in a few hours, make your bed. Make your bed right before you crawl in. It's magical. It just feels like it just feels like you're letting all that tension out. When you're

When your bedroom is tidy, you just sigh. You sigh when you walk into a kitchen and there isn't dishes all over the counter and it feels clean. You make an audible noise. I know you do. Think about this. Think about the sounds you make when you walk into a room in your home. That's clean. That's tidy. Where there's zero mess. You make a sound. That is all the stress, the anxiety, the pressure leaving you. Your space has the ability to do that. Your act of tidying has the ability not only to make you proud of yourself because you're cleaning and make you feel like you're accomplishing something and you're taking a step forward and you see it as self-empowerment. But then now when you walk back into that room later today, tomorrow and it looks good, a little more stress and pressure melts away.

It's freaking magical. It is so magical. And I forget. I forget how incredible this feels because now it's kind of become a habit, which is hilarious because I'm such a naturally messy person. And I am a slob and I am the person who just does not naturally put her dishes in the dishwasher when I'm done. I stick them in the sink. But then I make a point of a couple of times a day of just sticking stuff in the dishwasher. So it isn't like I'm constantly always keeping a tidy house. but I'm constantly tidying my house. Does this make sense? I don't think I'll ever be a person who is always putting everything back exactly when I'm done with it, but I will always be a person now through practice and training who without even realizing it is subconsciously tidying. So it doesn't feel like work. So I don't have to spend all day, Saturday, and Sunday.

But how do you get there? How do you get to a point where you're just picking up without realizing that you're picking up? It comes from practice. you're doing it right now and it comes from changing our mindset about the picking up. Instead of that grumbling that I was doing earlier today, that resentment, this isn't fair and I'm angry and I'm making a mountain out of it before I've even picked up the dishrag or the soap. Before I've even touched one thing, I'm mad and I don't want to do it. And I have to trick myself. I do. I have to trick myself and say Cass, it isn't about the fact that your husband didn't load the dishwasher, even though he should

have. It isn't about the fact that your kids left stuff everywhere, even though they're way old enough to pick up after themselves. You're going to go, you're going to ask them, you're going to say, okay, everybody, we're going to spend 10 minutes tidying. I need your help. Let's do this. And then you're going to just shut it off and you're going to do what you can do. Because the only person we really have control over is ourselves. And we're going to tell ourselves that we're doing this for us as a gift because we deserve it. And we're not the maid. And we're not picking up after other people because we have to.

And we're not. We're going to let that resentment melt away because nothing, nothing, nothing will make you feel better than waking up to a clean kitchen and feeling in control of your space and your home and your environment just starting every day from scratch again. and it again does not have to be perfect you just need to actively keep taking those steps forward and i know it feels like drowning sometimes and i know when there's 10 loads of laundry have to be done and and everywhere you look there's mess and you feel like i just clean this and it's and you like honestly tears i've cried and this is normal it is normal to feel upset

It's normal and it's okay. We have two choices. Two choices. We can continue to be upset and dwell and live in a house that's a mess or we can roll up our sleeves and kick some butt right now. Together. I want to take a second to thank Aura Frames for sponsoring today's video. ORAFraM's is hands down my favorite gift to give, especially to the moms on my list.

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on their best-selling frames. The deal ends on Mother's Day, May 14th, so don't wait. Terms and conditions apply. Okay, so I hope you're feeling really motivated. I hope while you're listening to this, you're putting away that laundry or you're doing in the kitchen, you're tackling a spot in your home that's kind of driving you crazy because, because an untidy house stresses us out. And what's so crazy is I know a lot of people, and I, I know a lot of people, and I,

used to say this too, who do have a messy home and they'll say things like tidy houses are for neurotic people or I've got better things to do than clean my house or the mess doesn't really bother me. But the truth is, that's a lie. I have never met anyone who likes the fact that their house is out of control. I also haven't met anyone who doesn't feel a sense of peace when their house is in control. It's just human nature. Forget the embarrassment. Forget friends coming over and somebody seeing your space.

Forget the fact that like today my daughter had a friend over for dinner and the kitchen was kind of like a hot mess and I felt that that stab of like, oh my gosh, embarrassment, even though it was a child seeing it, forget all of that. You. You, how do you feel when you walk into a space that's disorganized and messy? And it can feel really overwhelming, especially when things are really bad, or we feel like we constantly are cleaning and it's never staying clean because the truth is it isn't. The kitchen is something we're going to have to clean every day till the day we die. And it isn't fun. Now, I wish we didn't have to, but it doesn't have to be insane. It doesn't have to be this big time consuming thing that it is

when we've left it, when we've gone, like hours without picking up, or heaven forbid days, or go, my God, weeks. But it happens. It happens. It's so much harder to catch up than it is to keep up. And so if you're listening to this and you're catching up and you're scrubbing on deep down dirt or you're picking up things that are days accumulation of clutter or mess. or laundry or dishes.

Hear me. We just have to catch up and then we can keep up. Because keeping up is only a few minutes a day. Keeping up is a few minutes of tidying throughout the day. Keeping up means after every single meal, we do the dishes. We load them into the dishwasher or we unload or we wash them by hand if we don't have a dishwasher. But it doesn't take long because it's only one meal's worth.

we keep up we keep up on laundry a load a day man a load a day i know it's a pain but trust me you'll get used to it you throw it in in the morning you switch it over when you get home from work you put it away before bed i know this all sounds like oh i got tired and i got better things to do but are you going to be less tired on saturday no saturday you deserve and sunday you deserve to relax you deserve to still do the dishes and still do the dishes and still maybe do a load of laundry, but I do not want you scrubbing your house. I do not want you a chain to your washing machine and your dryer. I do not want you feeling like every day now is work. You deserve to do whatever the heck you want on the weekends. And we do our maintenance.

But that comes after the catch up. So while you're listening to this, it's going to be about half an hour, right? You're working together. We're doing this together. About 30 minutes of catching up, you can move a mountain. I hope you're looking around at what you've already accomplished when listening to this podcast and you are smiling and you are feeling proud and you're like, holy doodles, dudes. This house looks better. It looks better. And let's like rinse and repeat that. Okay. Until we're really caught up. And you might have to do this every day. But then once you're caught up, this is like every now and then we just catch up a little bit. We keep. We keep. up. We keep up. We load the dishwasher. We walk by. We're like, oh man, there's stuff out on the counter.

We pick it up. We put it away. No big deal. We go back to watching Netflix or whatever it is that you do. And I hope you have things that you do that aren't just working clean. Because you also deserve time for yourself. You deserve to watch a movie. You deserve to craft or knit or go out. out for coffee with friends go dancing go have some drinks go to a movie by your freaking self have you guys ever done this gone to the movie theater by yourself to watch a movie get a big bag of popcorn and a drink all by yourself no guilt why do we feel guilty about this why do we feel guilty about taking time to just enjoy ourselves without our family i don't know but i do I used to like always put myself less, always put my kids and my husband above myself.

And enough is enough. I deserve to do some things to make me happy because we can't pour from an empty cup. And the truth is most of us as women, we are the ones that kind of lead the household in mood. Does this make sense? Like when we are happy and calm and feel confident and proud, the rest of the members in our house, it's less stressful for them too. It just is. And maybe your household's different, but this is the way it is in my household.

Like when mommy's bad and when I'm in a bad mood and when I'm resentful and I'm tired, everybody else is cranky. Probably because I'm a big whiny baby about it. probably because I'm putting it on everyone. But yeah, I feel like my mood affects my family's mood more than anyone else's mood in the house affects everyone else. I'm like, yeah, I'm the mood leader, I guess. And the biggest thing that I can do is kind of just keep up.

And encourage my family to keep up too. We are all in this together. And the nagging and the screaming and the begging doesn't work for me. And my kids, it just doesn't. It doesn't work for my spouse. but when I lead by example and I show them that this is a positive experience and I just say to them, hey, we're all doing this now. I could really use your help. This isn't like a, we have to do it. It's, hey, let's see how fast we can do this. I really appreciate you guys pitching in.

This makes our whole house happier and healthier and more positive. Thank you. Thank you for doing this for me and mostly for yourself. because you guys, you, my kids, my husband, you deserve to have a clean room and a clean kitchen and a clean house too. And this attitude towards our home is contagious. And yeah, we got to fake until we make it sometimes because most of the time we might not feel this way. Most of the time we want to like punch our husbands in the throat. Why can't you just, you know, do the basic thing. or why do I have to give you a cookie when you clean the kitchen the one time, when I do it most of the time, we just got to let that go. We got to really just let that melt away, man, and focus

on the positive. Look around at what you've cleaned right now. Look around and feel good. Feel good. Feel good about what you've done. I'm going to leave this podcast right now. I'm going to go fill a bucket with some soapy water and I'm going to wipe stuff down with a microfiber cloth because for me my house smells better and I love like more than anything dumping the bucket out at the end and seeing how much dirt that I didn't even see go down the drain. Now what I mean? That was like a weird thing. I like watching people pop pimples on TikTok which I know is disgusting and I like watching how dirty I can get my bucket of water. You got to try this. Okay. So we're going to do this together. I want you to fill a bucket with hot water. It could just be a little bit of dish soap or any

multi-purpose cleaner. We don't have to overthink this. Get a clean rag and get some warm water and just wipe surfaces. Wipe those baseboards. Wipe your windowsills. Wipe your light fixtures. Maybe some ceiling fans. I don't know. You do you. You do you. And let's see how dirty we can get the water. It's satisfying, but it's also just, ah, you're going to lay in bed and you're just going to be like, I did something pretty amazing today. And I feel great about it. So thank you guys so much for listening. And I'll see you next time.