Clutterbug - Real-Life Hacks and Tips to Declutter, Organize and Clean your Home Fast - Are your limiting beliefs making your home MESSY? | Clutterbug Podcast # 85

Episode Date: March 11, 2020

In this podcast we talk about your natural thought patterns and how your habitual beliefs could actually be making your home messy! My new guided journal, "The Declutter Challenge" walks you through 30 easy steps to help you change your mindset and create NEW habits and beliefs about decluttering, organizing and housework. Learn more: https://clutterbug.me/the-declutter-challenge         You can find more Clutterbug content here: Website: http://www.clutterbug.me YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@clutterbug TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@clutterbug_me Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/clutterbug_me/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Clutterbug.Me/   #clutterbug #podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today we're talking about limiting beliefs, what they are and how your limiting beliefs could actually be making your home messy. Hey clutterbugs, welcome back to the clutterbug podcast. Today we're talking about limiting beliefs. What a limiting belief is, it's a belief that you have that's a habit, it's a thought that you just habitually have about certain things. that is keeping you small. It's keeping you from really growing as a person. And we're talking specifically today about decluttering limiting beliefs. So limiting beliefs that you could have that

stopping you from letting go of clutter, stopping you from having a home that just is easy to keep clean and tidy and it's easy to find everything and it's easy to put away and your home is not a huge chore on your to-do list. And it could be something is so small as a habit thought that you're having that's stopping you from having this and achieving this. So let's jump in. Let's talk about those limiting beliefs right now. The first limiting belief I want to talk about is that you may think of yourself as a messy person. You may have the belief that why even bother it's just going to get messy again. I can't do this. I'm bad at it. I'm bad at it. this I'm not good at housework and that's a belief that you've probably had for a really long time

it's a habit it's a thought that just naturally pops into your head and it's a negative thought that's probably becoming a self-fulfilling prophecy nobody wants to engage in activities that they think they're bad at so if you're telling yourself that you're bad at housework you're just never going to feel that motivation to do it if you're telling yourself that you're bad at housework you're probably looking for evidence for that everywhere. I mean, when we have a limiting belief, we're constantly seeing ways to reinforce that thought everywhere we're looking because we're looking for that evidence. So maybe you've tried and failed to organize something in the past. And you're like, see, see, I am actually bad at that. Or maybe you've, you know, done the

dishes and then the next day your kitchen's a mess again. And you're like, see, why would I bother? it just gets messy again. So you're looking for evidence to support that thought that you're just naturally bad at this. And unfortunately, like I said, it really does become a self-fulfilling prophecy. So how do we change that? How do we make the opposite, a positive thought, become a self-fulfilling prophecy? We first become aware that you're having that thought in the first place. And then you actively change that thought when it pops into your head.

So instead you're like, actually, I'm kind of good at organizing. And you're looking for proof to support that thought. So I'm really good at keeping up my calendar. I'm good at filling out my planner. My paperwork is pretty organized. I always hang my coat up when I come in the door and put my shoes away. I don't care how tiny it is. Let's look for ways that you can have a positive thought about yourself when it comes to your home.

So you can change that habit belief that you're, bad into creating a new habit belief that you're actually good at this. Because when you feel like you're actually good at this, you're going to naturally be motivated to keep doing it and to do it more often. Another limiting belief that I say all the time. And I really wanted to talk about this because I have a client that I just worked with who struggles with this. I've had many clients.

But last week I just finished working with a client who believes that buying stuff, saves them time and money. So not only do they believe that buying stuff makes them happy, I mean, everybody feels this way. The media tells us, buy a new car, buy this new product, buy this fancy thing, and you'll be happy. Everybody feels that way. But there's also a belief that people feel if they buy things, especially in bulk, it's going to save them time and money. and there definitely is a belief but i mean there's a reason for this going to Costco buying 50,000 cookies yes you don't have to go to the grocery store as often to buy cookies but everything in moderation and so often people either doing extreme couponing or constantly buying in bulk what ends up happening

is they're trying to save time and money but it ends up costing them time and money because they can't find anything. They have so much that they have no space to actually prepare meals. They end up putting things here, there, and everywhere and forgetting that they have it so the food is expiring. And creating, like making dinner is so much harder because they have to sift through so much product to find this stuff they need. And so they're wasting time and they're wasting money.

And that's exactly what I'm seeing with the client that I have now. she has four kids and so she loves going to Costco she's like this is saving me time and money and I promise you in the in the beginning she was finding proof for this because she was buying huge boxes of diapers and wipes and maybe formula or baby food and in that time it was saving her time and money as an exhausted new mother but now her pantry is so full she was trying to make soup while I was there. I was at her house decluttering. She was trying to make soup in an instaput. It took her over 40 minutes to find all the products that she needed because she had so many canned goods. She couldn't find her boxes of chicken bouleon. She couldn't find the things in the

freezer because it was so jam-packed. And so buying in bulk was a hindrance to her. Not only was her pantry full, but her laundry room was so full. We found over 40 boxes. of cereal that she had no space to fold clothing. So for her four children, doing laundry for that many kids was so hard because she had so many food products and other things that she had bought in bulk with the idea that it was going to save her time and money. She had more organizing products than any home I'd ever seen just creating clutter because it was that buying was going to save her time and money. So again, if you're suffering from this limiting belief. You're probably seeing evidence while I've run out of cereal. I can just go and find more.

I'm so glad I bought that in bulk. But I want you to take a step back and ask, have I crossed that line? Have I crossed that line where this is actually saving me time and money into this is costing me time and money? And can I find evidence to prove that this is costing me time and money? Is this taking away my valuable real estate in my home, is this clutter making me miserable? And is it worth buying in bulk anymore? So I'm not suggesting you never buy in bulk again, but if this is one of those limiting beliefs that you're really struggling with, I want you to start looking for the opposite evidence to prove that this isn't always true. If you have 15 boxes of baggies, like those clear plastic baggies, you have too much.

If you cannot fit all of your aluminum foil into a drawer in your kitchen, you have too much. If you have so many boxes of cereal, I don't care if you bought them on sale, that they do not all fit in the space that you have to store food, you have too many. And your thought that buying and bulk is saving you time and money is a lie. It's a lie that you're telling yourself, and as soon as you're aware of that, you can start actually finding evidence that it isn't an actual lie and stop the behavior to save yourself more time and money by having less stuff. Another limiting belief that people have that can create clutter is believing that they will be happy they kept it. And this is a habit that we've had

that is probably placed in our brains by loved ones, parents, without us even realizing it. We've probably carried this from childhood. Maybe your parents kept everything because they went through the depression and it's a habit for them to think, oh my gosh, I might need this one day. It's going to save money. It's wasteful to get rid of it. But this limiting belief is probably keeping you from really enjoying your home. It's probably filling up your home with unnecessary things and it's causing you fear and anxiety about getting rid of things because you're worried you're going to regret that you did. And you're probably, again, seeing evidence to support this limiting belief. Maybe you kept Halloween costumes from your kids and now your grandkids are wearing it. And you're like, see,

I'm so happy I kept that. Or I have another client that I'm working with that has never gotten rid of any of her clothing. And she was working with a dance group at her local church and they needed costumes and she literally, I mean because her house is filled to the top with stuff, was able to find enough clothing to completely have enough costumes for all of these people in the dance group to wear. And that is justification for her. I'm so, see, see, I'm glad I didn't get rid of any clothing ever because I was able to give costumes to all of these kids for nothing. And that was a sense of real pride for her. But the truth is that few minutes of pride, that few minutes where she could be like, yes, see, was not worth all of the pain and suffering that she has dealt with, all of the

humiliation and all of the self-depreciation that she's felt living in this really cluttered, messy home. But because her belief is, I'm going to be thankful I kept that. she's only looking for evidence to support that and of course you're finding it when you look for evidence everywhere of course you're going to find some supporting evidence to to reinforce that belief but if she could take a step back and really look at is it worth it the answer is 100% no and instead if she could look for evidence to say I'm not going to be happy that I kept it by looking around her home and saying oh my gosh my closets are so full I can't find it anything to wear in the morning. I don't have any extra space to breathe. My floor is covered with

clothing. My home is bursting and it takes so long to clean and tidy that I'm miserable. And it's because I have too much. If she starts changing the belief and looking for the opposite of her underlying belief to prove that it isn't true, that's how she can really overcome that and finally start letting go without feeling that fear and anxiety. that she's going to regret it. Another limiting belief, I'm just going to throw them all at you, another limiting belief that a lot of people have. And again, I have another client that's dealing with this specifically, but I've had so

many clients that have expressed this to me, especially artistic people, they feel like if they let go of things, less stuff is going to stifle their creativity. So if they love sewing, they want to keep every scrap of fabric because they're going to create something out of it and they're going to be happy they kept it because they're going to turn it into something else. Or if they're really an eclectic person, they pride themselves on the fact that they have a lot of different styles and a lot of different stuff because it makes them feel creative and artistic and they can make something out of it. I definitely see this in a lot of craft rooms full, full, full with every little scrap of everything, pom-poms and

fabric and sewing supplies and crafting supplies, every old pieces of garbage that they could maybe turn into something cool. But what really happens is they're not feeling creative because their space is so full. They are feeling overwhelmed when they're in the space. They can't find the things that they need. They're forgetting about a lot of the stuff that they have because it's so full they can't see what they have. And they're not crafting nearly as much as they would like to because it is impossible to organize when you have too much stuff. But their belief that they get rid of things is going to make, you know, them less creative and they're going to craft less is actually not true.

So again, if you're struggling with this limiting belief, find the opposite. Find proof of the opposite. Yes, you can definitely find proof to, like, oh, I made a bag out of those old jeans, you know? or I was able to use those old, I don't know, egg cartons to make this really cool paper machet project with my kids. You can always find evidence to support it, but you can also always find evidence to support the opposite. How is all this stuff making your life harder?

How is all this stuff taking away your ability to be creative? How is this stuff really making you unhappy? and when you ask yourself the opposite of your limiting belief, you really can see the whole picture and make logical, real, true decisions that aren't influenced by those lies that your brain is telling you. So I want you really to ask yourself, if you're struggling with clutter, what is your underlying belief? What is that reason that you're feeling anxiety about letting go? and are you looking for proof to justify that fear? And what's the opposite of that?

How can you prove the opposite of that? If your belief is I'm going to regret getting rid of this, really think about how you can change that old thought process, right? That's probably something that's passed down to you from your parents that you've had for a really long time. Oh, I'm going to regret getting rid of this. The truth is, I've not regret. getting rid of anything. And there may be things, those 1% of things that you're going to have regret getting rid of, but 99% of the stuff that you're going to get rid of is going to make

your life easier. So is your fear over that 1% worth filling up your home, which is making your life harder? Is it worth it? And the answer is no. So take a look around your home and think to yourself, I'm fearful that I'm going to regret getting rid of these things. But is keeping these things making me happy? Is keeping these things worth the turmoil that I'm feeling and the embarrassment about my home or the amount of work that it takes to maintain a cluttered home? Is my fear really justified? Because is it really worth it to hold on to it?

And I can promise you the answer is no, because the truth is, is keeping those things as probably wasted years of you enjoying your home the way you really should be. It's probably taking so much of your time to maintain all of the things you have. It's probably wasting money because you've forgotten about so many things that you actually have by holding on to things out of fear of wasting money. It's so ironic, but I want you just to think about your limiting beliefs. That's what I'm hoping you're really taking from this podcast, thinking about what your brain naturally goes to when you're thinking about decluttering or you're actually decluttering a space, those thoughts that are habit to you, those old thought

patterns that come in? And are you trying to justify them by looking for proof? And how can you flip them on their head and look at the opposite? And how can you prove the opposite? And how can you really have a big picture understanding of your clutter and make real, informed decisions without relying on old habit patterns and thought and thought processes. So I hope you enjoy. I hope you're looking at your clutter in a little bit different of a way and I'm going to see you guys next time.