Clutterbug - Real-Life Hacks and Tips to Declutter, Organize and Clean your Home Fast - How to Overcome Perfection Paralysis | Clutterbug Podcast # 70

Episode Date: March 5, 2019

Are you a perfectionist? Does your need to do things "right" cause indecision, overthinking and procrastination? Perfection Paralysis is a real thing and in this podcast I share a few tricks you help you overcome it once and for all. #productivity #selfhelp #perfectionist  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hey clutterbugs and welcome back to the clutterbug podcast. Today we're talking about overcoming perfection or perfection paralysis. So thanks so much for joining me on this podcast. I am Cass from Clutterbug. and today we're going to talk about perfection paralysis or overcoming perfection. And I thought this was a really great topic because we are going with our productivity boot camp and one of the biggest obstacles to being more productive in life, getting the things done that we really want to get done, is actually perfectionism. They've done a lot of studies on procrastination and what they've found is most people who tend to, to struggle chronically with procrastination are in fact perfectionists.

And not only can perfectionism lead to procrastination, but it can lead to mental exhaustion from overthinking things all the time, it can lead to indecision, and of course, it can lead to clutter. I actually just had a little conference call live with a CC. She contacted me. She wanted to talk about overcoming some of the... her clutter issues and so we did a live Skype call I just got off the Skype call with her and when I asked her what her clutter bug type was she told me she was a butterfly but I could tell immediately

that she was in fact a perfectionist that she was in fact a bee she was judging herself based on the fact that her place was messy based on the fact that she had clutter and piles and mess all around But what I saw when I looked at her clutter wasn't in fact a mess. I saw delayed work. I saw procrastination. I saw piling because she wanted to take the time to put it away properly. Because she wasn't sure of what to do with it. Because she struggled to find the best way to dispose of things.

Because she was fearful of letting go. Because she wasn't sure if she would need things in the future. So these are not typical traits that you see with, in fact, a butterfly. Butterflies generally aren't overthinking anything. They're not even realizing that they're making piles or dropping things. They're big picture thinkers. They're done with a wrapper. They're just tossing it down, not because they don't know the proper way to dispose of it,

but because they're not even thinking of what to do with the wrapper. They are on to something else. And so their clutter issues really come. from more of a lack of executive function, more of the ADD brain, the big picture thing, failing to stop and look at the details. Whereas a bee or a cricket, that perfectionism comes from looking too much at the details, focusing too much on the little things. It's the exact opposite problem.

So let's talk about perfectionism and how you can overcome it. I have to be honest with you. I am not a perfectionist in any way. I need to be a little bit more of a perfectionist. As a ladybug, I am a big picture thinker. I struggle to stop and plan, to stop and think about the details, think about the best way to do something. I'm just like, bam, bam, bam, doing all these things. And so it is hard for me to relate to the struggles of a perfectionist. But I do see it in my husband and I do see it in many many many clients and it's something now that I can recognize just by looking at a person's clutter and not to say that all perfectionists have clutter because they don't but sometimes a perfectionist can think that they are not a perfectionist because they have

clutter because they are not perfect because they're not doing something how they think it should look or how other people are doing it and all of this is boiling down to the same issue. And so how do we overcome that perfectionism? How can we recognize what is really going on and how can we stop ourselves from it leading to procrastination and indecision and mess? They are not messy people. They are very organized people. And in fact, that over-organization, that analytical, logical brain is in overdrive, causing it to overcomplicate and causing them to overthink things.

So I'm going to use Cece as an example. I know I'm throwing her under the bus here. But she had a pile that she had brought in from her trunk. She had cleaned out her car and put it in her bedroom so she could see it so she could remember so she could deal with it. and that pile had sat there for over a month. And when I look at that pile, I saw cardboard box that needed to be thrown out. I saw some papers. I saw some attempts at car organization that had failed that she just needed to unpack and put away.

And a few things that needed to be donated. When I looked at that pile, I saw 10 minutes of work. When Cece looked at that pile, she saw, I have no idea what to do with this. what is the best way to do these things. I'm going to need to take an hour out of my time and schedule and deal with this. She saw indecision and she saw anxiety and she saw overwhelm. And so what I really recommend if you are in the same boat, if you are feeling overwhelmed by just your brain going and overdrive,

overthinking things is to always start with a brain dump. So write down a list of, what you want to accomplish. If it is just that pile, I want you to just brain dump. No, not overthink it, not put things in order. It's the opposite of what I want you to do. I want you to grab a piece of paper and scribble messy. I got to donate some of that stuff. I got to throw some of this stuff out. I have to recycle this. Look at individual things. I have to put this away, these extra products away in the bathroom closet. As soon as you take the time to brain dump that out, get it out of your brain where you're overthinking, over processing, over analyzing, and put it on paper,

it's going to be so much easier for you to stop overthinking. Then I want you to look at your messy piece of paper and I want you to write a one on the thing that is the most important that you do through 10. And then start with the first thing. Not overthink it. Whatever you wrote that one beside. I want you to get up and do it immediately. And if you're struggling with that, the Mel Robbins approach, it's called the five second rule is very, very helpful. Mel Robbins is a perfectionist. She dealt with procrastination because of her perfectionism and what worked for her was the five second rule. So you count down from five, five, four, three, two, one. You say it out loud, you count down 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, and you burst like a rocket and make yourself do it.

For whatever reason, taking that time to count down from 5 really does help just switch off that overthinking brain and push you into action. It can push you into action. So we're going to brain dump, we're going to prioritize, and we're going to push into action. I also want, if clutter is the issue, I want you to consider. having a new mantra called when in doubt throw it out so many perfectionists actually it can lead to hoarding it can lead to having way too much stuff because they don't want to make a mistake they're not sure what to do with it they don't want to be wasteful they may need it one day it was

expensive what is the best way to recycle this who is the best person that i can give this to all of these struggles come down to one thing perfectionism it all comes down to overthinking and so when they're in doubt when there is indecision when they have to decide what the best thing is they shut down and make no decisions at all and it leads to piles it leads to indecision and so i want you to recognize this in yourself that this is something that you do and something that you struggle struggle with and I want you to embrace good enough and I want you to push yourself with the mantra when in doubt throw it out and it's it's drastic isn't it it's drastic so if you're not sure what to do with something throw it out and this is going to make you feel anxiety and this is going to

push you out of your comfort zone and just listening to this I want you to look around at things that you're perhaps holding on to because you're not sure what to do with them, and I'm going to tell you to throw them out. And that's going to make you feel gross inside, and that's good. I want you to feel uncomfortable. I want you to push yourself out of your comfort zone, out of that little cocoon of, I need this to be perfect, I need everything to have a plan and I need to do the best thing. I don't want to make a mistake. I want you to push yourself out of that comfort zone and embrace this in some small way. And is throwing out all of your stuff the best way to do it? No, it isn't. But what's happening right now for you is that you're stuck in a cycle of

indecision. You're stuck in that cycle of perfection paralysis, overthinking things, overcomplicating things, which is leading to you just having way more work than you need to. It's making your life so much harder than it needs to be. And so yes, I am not suggesting you throw out everything in your home, but today, right now, I want you to throw out something. I want you to throw something out and feel that feeling of liberation, no longer having to think about that thing anymore, stress about it and no longer having to worry about the best way to do it or clean around it, it's out, it's gone, it's out of your life, and you're moving on. And it's going to be something that I want you to practice until that indecision becomes

easier. And when you're pushing yourself, okay, I'm not sure what I'm going to do with this, I'm going to throw it out, I guarantee perhaps an answer will pop in, oh, I'm going to donate it instead or I'm going to give it to my sister or I'm going to use it for organizing my something you're going to force yourself to make that decision but when in doubt when that decision doesn't come when in doubt throw it out and so it's okay for us to feel anxiety sometimes it's okay to push through that feeling of anxiety and do it anyways because that's how we get to the other side That's how we level up in life. It's feeling uncomfortable.

It's pushing ourselves outside of our boundaries so we can be bigger and better than we are today. And so you've probably not loving this podcast if you're a perfectionist. You're probably feeling like I'm being a little more pushy and dramatic than I normally am. And I am because I know that when we push ourselves, outside of our comfort zone, when we really address what the underlying issues in our life are, and we force ourselves to deal with them in the ugliest, nastiest, most uncomfortable way, that's when we have real progress. And for you, the progress comes from realizing that you're overthinking things and stopping the cycle, realizing that your perfectionism is what's getting

in the way of you living the best life that you possibly can. and pushing yourself through that. Embracing good enough organization. Embracing good enough planning. Embracing that your house cleaning is good enough. Embracing whatever issues it is that you're procrastinating or that's causing indecision in your life. Pushing through those uncomfortable feelings and doing it anyways.

And realizing that everything that you think is going to take a long time is going to take a fraction of that actual time to complete. It really is, I promise you. So Mel Robbins, five second rule, look at something. Five, four, three, two, one, make yourself do it. So right now, I want you to stop listening to this podcast. I want you to look around at your home, find something that you've been struggling to deal with. You're not sure what to do with.

You're sick of looking at those piles of paper. You're sick of looking at that pile of clutter on your kitchen counter. you're sick at looking at those baby toys that your kids have outgrown, but you're not sure what to do with them. And when in doubt, right now, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, throw it out. Thank you guys so much for listening. You probably didn't enjoy, but that's okay. Sometimes I have to be here to help you through the hard stuff.

Thank you guys so much, and I'll see you next time.