Clutterbug - Real-Life Hacks and Tips to Declutter, Organize and Clean your Home Fast - How to Simplify your Life - Step Three - Wanting Less | Clutterbug Podcast # 78

Episode Date: October 18, 2019

In the final podcast of our three part mini series, I'm sharing three strategies for wanting less. This is about being present, grateful and happy with our life right now.  You can download my FREE "How to Simplify your Life" mini journal at: https://clutterbug.me/2019/10/how-to-simplify-your-life-free-mini-journal.html Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hey guys, welcome back to the Clutterbug podcast. We're doing a three-part mini-series about simplifying your life, basically how to be lazier and still get all of your wonderful dreams achieved. And first we talked about the first step, which is having less. Then we talked about the second step, which is doing less. And now today's podcast is about the third step, which is wanting less. So thanks so much for joining me on today's podcast. as part of the three-part mini-series about simplifying your life. We all want to do less. We want to have less. We just want life to be easier, right?

Life is so hard, but we make it harder than it has to be. So this little podcast series is about making life easier so we can be happier. That's what this is all about. And if you miss the first two parts, the first one was step one, having less. So make sure you go back and to listen to that and where I talk about three, simple things that you can do to have less. The other one was step two, doing less, how to be less busy. Three steps that you can take to just do less. So you have more time for the things that do make you happy to stop that cycle of being busy for no reason other than to say that we are busy.

And that was the last podcast. So make sure you check out that called doing less. And today we're talking about wanting less. And I feel like this is the hardest. one for me personally. I have the type of personality where I'm always looking for the next thing. I never feel satisfied whether it comes to food or it comes to material possessions or success. There's never like that top of the mountain. I find myself constantly wanting a bigger home, better furnishings. I want just more out of life. And is that a bad thing? Well, not always, but it can really be distracting from today. Always looking to the future and always looking for the things that we don't currently have that we want is a great motivator sometimes.

But it also can make us feel like crap and it can distract us from enjoying what we have today. There is really something to be said for people who are grateful for what they have and who are not always looking for the next score, for the next thing. in life for really just being present in today. And so that's what we're going to talk about. Three steps that we can do to want less. And the first part of that is gratitude. It's practicing gratitude, practicing being grateful for what we have today. So it brings back our focus to the moment, to where our feet are planted right now, not where they're going to take us, not what's coming down the path but today being aware of where we are today and being really happy for the things that we actually have and practicing gratitude is way easier than it sounds it's literally just writing down

stuff that we're happy for a lot of people call this like gratitude journaling but you can just grab a scrap piece of paper and write down things that you're really grateful for things that you're happy things that you like about your house today things that you love about your career right now, things that make you so happy in your family, in your relationships, in yourself. What are you grateful for about yourself now? Let's look at how far you've come and let's really take a moment to be present and be grateful for that. That can stop us from constantly feeling bad about what we don't have.

and that can definitely create a cycle of just like self-hatred and low self-esteem and this vicious cycle of just like never having enough, never feeling enough, which often translates into us filling that void or that feeling like we have not enough with other things like food, in my case, or material possessions, people who shop, people who do drugs, people who gamble, people who do these negative things. things because we feel like there's this hole and this void in today. And we can fill up that just by being grateful, by really stopping and looking at what we currently have. I'm not suggesting that we don't want to move forward in life, that we're not wanting to have a bigger house or further that career or have better relationships. I'm saying there really is a magic that comes from just being grateful for what we have right now and wanting less and wanting to not fill that void. So the step one is writing down what you're grateful for. Whether that is a piece of paper or you get a empty journal and every day you try to write something that you're grateful for.

I mean, this is a practice. This isn't something that's like a one and done. Having gratitude in our lives is a habit that we have to really grateful. grow just like any other habit. So maybe every night before we go to bed, we set an alarm in our phone that we're going to write five things that we were grateful for today. We're going to leave that notebook on our bedside table. And that's a new habit that we're creating a habit of gratitude. And then throughout the day, you're going to find that you're like, oh, you know what, I'm really grateful for this. Or I'm going to write this down later. I'm grateful for my friend that I had

coffee with. I'm grateful that my husband emptied the dishwasher. I'm grateful that my home is, you know, beautiful today, that it's clean today. Let's write that down. Let's be present and let's change our mindset about where we are right now. So the second step of wanting less is just that self-awareness of why we want more in the first place. And it always comes down to happiness. We feel that when we have that promotion or when we start a business or when we earn enough money or when we have the house of our dreams then we'll be happy but what is that happiness really look like and what does make us happy and I've been doing a lot of work on this lately um looking at my own happiness and where that comes from and for me I feel the most happy when I feel like I'm making a

difference when I feel like I'm having an impact on someone else's life. I don't know why. I just do. It's probably selfishness. I feel like I'm not here for nothing. I have a purpose. I have a worth in this life. And so that really does bring me happiness. My husband feels happiness in other ways. He feels truly happy when he focuses on what he has right now, when he focuses on kids in his house. and the fact that he has time in his life to just enjoy the now and the present, whereas I really do feel happiness when I'm growing, when I'm moving forward into the future. And so what does make you happy?

What are the things in your life that bring you the most joy? And how can we focus on that instead of distracting ourselves with other things, trying to get that happiness in so many other ways? When we really know the things that bring us joy, we can look at cultivating it in that little playground instead of all the other ways in our life that we're trying to fill those that get that serotonin drip, that little, those dopamine feelings when we want to feel happiness in all the wrong ways. It starts with knowing the right way, I guess. Does this make sense? I hope this makes sense. So write down some things that make you happy. Think about your past moments when you were the

happiest, what does happiness look like for you? And how can we get more of it in your life without having to shop or, I don't know, drink wine at the end of the night because you're feeling so stressed out or eat chocolate like I do when you want to feel those little boosts of happiness? What are other things that we can do that are positive to feel those boosts of happiness that don't involve filling that void with stuff, with things in our life that ultimately are not going to make us happier in the long run. I just rambled for a while, but what I basically mean to say is just having the self-awareness of actual things that do make us happy and kind of having a plan to incorporate those more into our lives so we're not

distracting ourselves with crap that is fleeting happiness. And last but not least, when it comes to wanting less. Let's focus on experiences over possessions. We live in such a horrible materialistic world where we're bombarded by ads and like all of our neighbors have new shiny things and we watch television and we have to every four minutes be bombarded by, buy these new things. They'll make you happy. They'll make you complete. You go shopping and you just see clothes and you're like, oh, this shirt seems so much better than every other shirt I have in my closet. And we can't help but feel like possessions equal happiness because that's what the world is telling us constantly. So instead, let's sort of change our mindset and focus on experiences over possessions.

Because as soon as we come home with that new possession, it just is one more thing that we chuck in the pile of stuff in our home. And ultimately, it doesn't make us any happier. Ultimately, it makes us more unhappy because now we have more clutter in our lives. and that's what we want less of because clutter equals work and we want less work. Unused stuff equals more time, more effort, more brain space, just more work, period. And we want less work. So we have to have less stuff, which means we want to want less stuff. But how do we stop that? How do we stop that cycle of going to the store seeing all those new shiny things and wanting to bring them home?

well we have to focus obviously on being grateful for what we have that was step one having self-awareness of the actual things that make us happy that aren't that shiny t-shirt that new water bottle the new car what are we what really makes us happy just being aware of that having that self-aware of the difference of fleeting happiness and real happiness and then choosing experiences over possessions. So making a list of places that you want to travel. Making a list of free date night things that you can do with your husband or your family locally. Making a list of all the books you'd like to read that you can get at the library. Make a list of movies that you want to watch. And reward yourself with those experiences instead of possessions. Have that list somewhere that's out

and visual. So when you are feeling low, when you are feeling like you need something to perk you up to give you that boost of happiness, we can turn to an experience over a possession. I'm not saying that you have a shopping problem, but I know that we all do this. I know that I catch myself when I'm feeling low. I go on Amazon Prime and I buy something useless or I'll go to the bookstore and I'll pick up a new book or I'll eat a chocolate brownie. The truth is I'm just looking to sort of fill that, to bring me back up, to perk me back up, to fill that little void that I'm feeling at that present time. But if I had a list of experiences that could fill that void instead of looking to the material possessions, I would get so much more. And I wouldn't be left with that material

thing that's taking away from me at the end. I wouldn't be left with that junk to add to the junk pile in my home that is ultimately taking from my happiness. So material possessions are such a fleeting happiness. We feel good for a minute or two and then overall it's taking from us. So focusing on the experiences over possessions. So really this step of wanting less is so easy because it comes down to a pen and a piece of paper. It comes down to writing down things that we're grateful for, writing down things that really make us happy. What is the things in our life that have long-lasting happiness? And writing down experiences that we can do, little things, whether it's watching the movie or reading books we want to read or places we can go.

We know apple picking with our kids on Saturday. We can get a blank. it and have a layout and having snacks and watching this under the stars on Saturday night with the kids. What are some things that we can do, experiences that we can do that can really bring joy in our lives that have long lasting joy that isn't just buying something to chuck into the pile? And so those three things can really make us want less stuff in life, can really make us appreciate what we have today can stop filling our home with that empty happiness, which all comes down to simplifying our life. So again, having less, doing less, and wanting less are the three things that we can do that can just simplify our lives in so many ways. And a simplified life equals a

happy life, a content life. And it opens up our space and our mind for so many cooler things. It gives us that space not only in our home but in our life to do the things that really will make a difference that will really bring us immense happiness and joy instead of filling it with all this busy, useless, empty things that are ultimately taking from us. So I don't know if this is helpful or not, but this is like the weird woo-woo journey that I'm on right now. And I'm not a woo-woo person. I'm not like a spiritual meditating person, but I cannot deny how organizing my life had a huge impact in my overall happiness because my life was simpler. It was just easier.

Every day it was easier to get ready. I didn't have to waste time finding things. It had this magnificent positive thing in my life and I want that in other areas too. I want to take the same feeling and overall impact that organization had and I want to have that in all areas of my life without having to do a lot of work. by being as lazy as possible. I want to simplify my life in really simple ways. And so having less, doing less, wanting less, that's my focus right now. And I have to tell you it is definitely working. So I'm going to continue to share my journey with you, but I wanted to challenge you to

three steps that you can do and three steps within those that are simple and easy and lead to a simpler, happier life. So thank you guys so much for listening. If you've missed the two other podcast, make sure you go back and listen to those. And I'm going to see you guys next time.