Coffee Convos with Kail Lowry and Lindsie Chrisley - 130: Lindsie's Audio Journey, She's Her Own Twin, and Hard Decisions

Episode Date: November 12, 2020

Lindsie's audio mishaps journey has finally (fingers crossed) come to an end. Finally all the equipment is working, and she lets listeners know all about the road to fixing the problem. Then Lindsie and Kail talk about a super interesting article about a woman who was not a genetic match to the children she gave birth to. And holidays can be hard, especially where there is tension between family members. Lindsie tells Kail about some tough decisions she has made recently, and the hard conversations she has had about it. Sometimes you just need to do what's best for yourself. Plus, some actual coffee convos, on this week's episode of Coffee Convos. This episode was sponsored by: O-Shot, FightCamp, VistaPrint, & Tru Earth Have a question you want answered? Want to give Kail and Lindsie a call? Leave them a message at ?(609)-316-0060?. Music by Nathaniel Wyvern. Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License.

Hey guys it's coffee combos podcast you've been crazy busy and we really haven't had time to catch up I ghosted you ghosted me no I ghosted everybody like okay so I'm not I'm not offended then if it's everybody but if it was just me I would be like hmm why is she ghosting yeah um okay so first of all it's so funny because I saw on your Instagram story that you stopped at Starbucks today and got a coffee and I also had plans after my appointment to stop and get a coffee to record with on my way home and I stopped at Duncan and it's funny that you said that you're like not broken up with Starbucks anymore

because I'm now not broken up with Duncan so I feel like it's a really good place to be yeah I you know what it's I'm glad you brought it up because I really wanted to start this podcast episode out with a coffee convo and so um you know I wanted to let everyone know that me and Starbucks are back together and I'm thinking it I mean Starbucks is really fucking expensive and I also so that was like one thing that I kind of felt I've always felt that right but I also had like this like want I wanted to talk about this too was do you ever you're a Duncan drinker but for those that drink Starbucks do you ever

feel like a grande is too small but a venti is like too much coffee because that's where I'm at hmm see I when I do drink Starbucks I have thought of that actually you have yes it's like it almost makes you feel like if the grande was just like a couple ounces more yes then it would be better yeah maybe we should come up with maybe we should be cup inventors yeah like grande and a half yes literally we just told everybody our next business plan I just it's one of those things where it's like a grande for what I ordered today I got a skinny iced vanilla latte with pumpkin cold foam cream or whatever it is

and my publicist was the one that gave me that order and go follow her Alexa Garcia but anyhow so it's so good but it's also over five dollars it's like five something it's so expensive I'm just like why are why is coffee it's so good and I'm gonna keep buying it but it's it's really like sometimes out of budget you know we need to do a coffee combos line of coffee for sure okay next thing I went and got waxed this morning and I can waxed where like your cat yeah my cat okay I can officially say that I have not used a razor since August wow okay so that's pretty I mean I still like shaped my legs and my arm

right right right right but now it's like a slippery slope right it's like once you start getting the cat wax it's like okay should I move to like my pits too and would it last as long I don't know I feel like my armpit here grows back faster than any other hair yeah do you feel like that yes 100% but I will say I'm a 100% advocate for the cat wax like 100% it's like the grow out is just so much better the texture is just different I don't know I'm just and definitely get the butt strip I I never thought that it was painful to get like my asshole wax like that was never an issue I literally had that conversation

with my wax girl today about how so many people when we talk about waxing said that they would be scared to like get their ass waxed mm-hmm and it's honestly the least painful part of the whole experience so if you guys want to get your booty wax like get out there and do it you won't regret it get your booty wax you won't regret I promise you won't so positive experience and I don't think I'm gonna go off of it and in fact I put on my Christmas list that I just wanted like a wax pass because where I go you go to the same place I do yeah but I just want a wax pass for for Christmas I think that's a perfect gift and so and

that's something that I would use obviously monthly so speaking of waxing okay so I have someone my friend actually who helps me with the babies like while I'm while I work on certain days right so I had asked her to come help me this morning I was like I have a wax appointment and this is just for my eyebrows but I was like I have a my eyebrow appointment for tint and wax at 10 15 so I probably need someone you know I need to leave by 9 30 to get there on time she gets to my house and I get like the little reminder text and it's like your appointment for November 10th and I was like oh wait what's today's

date I'm thinking all day today that today is Monday November 10th and so she came way earlier than I needed her and I felt really bad but actually my appointment is tomorrow oh wow yeah yeah that's where I'm at that's happened to me before as well okay I'm not the only one yeah I've actually shown up to an appointment and like gone to check in and they're like yeah your appointment's like three days from now and I'm like okay but could you fit me in at this time like right now right here you know right right like I don't want to come back I I'm too much I swear I really am too much you know what we are what we

are the worst couple you know why because we didn't wish each other a happy anniversary and I'm salty about it what it was it already why did I think it was like November 17th or something well we posted our first post on coffee combos podcast Instagram on November 4th of 2017 so let me go let me go creep for a minute well it's archived so you would have to go into the cives you know why don't I'm not even logged into that account do less or more actually do I need to do more do more please but yes our first actual episode I'm not sure but basically it's our anniversary so happy three years of podcasting happy

three years really enjoyed it and I was gonna like fake like I'm quitting but like I'm not yeah no we can't we're not this we've worked too hard for this we've come way too far we're not quitting this is it we are three years deep into this relationship oh man hey also another thing that I was thinking about was the fact of my really bad audio and I need to tell everybody the story about this so please do because if I get one more goddamn message about it I'm like we're fixing it relax like calm down so obviously my fault but originally my recorder was set to it has like an internal mic on there so for the first

like however long we were recording when we moved over to our new home I was basically using a mic as a prop and talking into it but it wasn't working the whole time so anything that was getting picked up was getting picked up on the internal mic on the recorder right so once that got fixed I was like oh that fixes the problem so then there was still a little bit of issues so they thought oh well tech people thought oh well it's probably the cord like there could be like a short in the quarter whatever so then they send me a new cord I replace it there's still an issue so then I'm like oh well then it's got to

be the recorder so then I get to Philly and literally my recorder just doesn't work so basically they sent me a new recorder overnight and then we ended up not using it when we were in Philly because Kale's recorder has two like holes that you can plug mics in so then I just plugged into that so then I'm like damn it it's got to be the microphone because I'm plugged into Kale's device and she doesn't have any issues with it so like there's got to be that issue so then last week when I went to record some stuff I used the new microphone that they sent me with the new cord that they sent me with my old recorder and it

worked perfect so long story short you're in business fix yes we are back in business yes although I have to say I listen to I don't normally listen back to us it's just like something I just don't do but the other day I and I texted you because I said you know what we're really actually funny like I don't care what anyone says like I didn't not notice a sound issue you didn't know in the Philly cheesesteak episode where we're talking about Philly cheesesteaks with the cheese whiz and stuff like that like you sounded perfectly fine to me but I think it was because some of my audio was getting picked up on yours and like

I literally was holding a mic the whole time I was in Philly and it wasn't picking up at all at all yeah so it doesn't it doesn't it didn't sound weird on my on my phone though when I played it so I don't I don't know how some people are hearing the the problem and some people aren't I mean it's whatever it's fixed now that's the most important thing but yeah I didn't I didn't notice it well hopefully we get good reviews about this and you can hear me and it's all good next topic that I just my phone literally started ringing ten minutes

before we were supposed to start recording and it was the school and I'm like oh shit like maybe he fell on the playground like I don't know so the it's a principal and he's telling me that Jackson had to come to the office because it was an incident so of course I'm thinking like oh my gosh like what happened like what did he do so story goes that Jackson was in the bathroom and he was standing behind some kid and waiting on the kid to wash his hands and the kid was like monkeying around or something and Jackson told him that he needed to hurry up like a move so the kid literally goes and punches him in the

chest okay and what and then well of course will of course will was like what did he punch him back and I'm like no like he didn't punch him back and will's like why so I just wonder like how many people that have calls home like this or how they've like taught their children to handle situations like this because I feel like growing up I was taught if somebody puts their hands on you as long as they put their hands on you first like you fight back a hundred percent I I don't I understand other people's perspectives on that and like I hear you if you don't want to teach your kids that but for me I'm I'm teaching my

kids to fight back they ditched it out so you know give it back apparently Jackson just went back to his class and was like hey so-and-so punch me in the chest and then the principal got involved at that point so I don't know obviously that's probably taking the higher road and just like not getting in the weeds or whatever you want to call it but I don't know I was just like well thanks for calling and letting me know and I guess when Jackson since you can't tell me what the kid's name is they hit him when Jackson gets home I'm gonna find out I'm gonna find out who it is and then I'm gonna call his mama

I'm not I can't just like first of all who just like goes and hauls off and hit somebody in the school bathroom in the first grade bathroom at that like but why like what is I don't I don't get it oh it was so funny too because he was like explaining the situation of like what was going on and I'm just like I find it really hard to believe that Jackson said something so violent to this kid that it would result in him just like hauling off and punching him in the chest so yeah I don't I don't picture Jackson ever saying something that like that you know what I mean for sure and then this little soul and he would like

he's very nurturing too so like he's always like trying to make sure nobody's getting hurt and like all of that so I was just so confused so I was like well obviously I wasn't there and I'm not gonna you know try to be like my kids perfect but it just doesn't sound like something that Jackson would do and right he was like well yeah I mean I kind of gathered gathered that but you know there is disciplinary action being taken against the other child so I'm like good that little shit needs to be suspended and I better not see him at carpool it's not carpool but I get you I better not see him at carpool I better

not and I have a feeling that I know who it is and I'm like don't let me catch him on the playground oh so Jackson wouldn't tell you the name no the school won't why because they said that it's like sometime type of like protection of privacy or something like that and I'm like okay well that can play his hands on my kid it's like I should be knowing protection of privacy to when your kid fights somebody I thought you do get to know who the person is yeah if your kid tells you used to but though like when we were in school I don't know if you remember this but like if there was ever any altercations everybody's parents

was coming to the office and like he was both in there is that like is that like nationwide because I remember I mean Isaac's in fifth grade now but I remember distinctly a third grade incident and they told me the name of the other kid I don't know interesting everybody write in and tell us if it is if they tell you the person's name or if not or if they just know that I'm gonna go crazy and they're like I should maybe protect this person it's like yeah you probably should so anyway so that's how my day has gone up until this point and I'm like mmm that's been pretty eventful for what time it is you know

right I mean it's almost one I have not aside from my little like scheduling mishap I don't really have a whole lot going on I have the podcast and then just like taking care of the kids today so I haven't had too much of an eventful day oh so I'm working on like I went through the kids closets yesterday last night and I'm going through everything like truly getting rid of like things that don't fit donating whatever whatever so Isaac had so many like pretty much like brand new like clothes and I passed them down to Lincoln and Lincoln had so many like gently use stuff that I passed down to Luxe if it's really worn

down I don't pass them down just because it just doesn't make sense and a lot of times I honestly don't even pass stuff down from Lincoln from Isaac to Lincoln because their styles are just so different but because Isaac played basketball last year a lot of his like athletic shorts and stuff were like brand new he only wore them like once a week or you know what I mean like that kind of thing so I was doing that and I noticed you know when I got rid of pretty much everything for Isaac he has nothing he literally has nothing and I was just about to buy them all new fall stuff well now I really just cut my cost

into like a third because I don't have to buy anything for eyes for Lincoln I don't have to buy anything for Luxe the only thing I have to buy for is Isaac so I'm pretty pumped about that and I'm super excited to like just like downsize so much well first of all I love I feel like it's that time of the year maybe that people just get into like these nesting modes or whatever you call it where you go in your closets and just start like getting rid of stuff because I'm doing that at the end of the week and it always feels so much better to feel like a minimalist like okay I don't have things that like I don't need but to

your point of your kids all have different styles it's just so funny to me because when you say that they have different styles I'm like Jackson doesn't even know styles like I don't know how to describe it so like okay like when I picture when you tell me and I don't I hope this isn't like judgmental so like when you tell me about Jackson or like what I do know about him I feel like he probably dresses like Isaac but he is like he is a he plays baseball so like he has that little like athletic side to him Isaac is if Isaac could pick his own outfit he would wear like like fleece sweatshirts he loves fleece

sweatshirts like that's like his thing but he's like a polo or like button down khakis cargo kind of guy like he's not wearing you know Nike track suits where like Lincoln and Lux are wearing Nike track suits all day every day actually Lux is only wearing Nike track pants because he takes his shirt off immediately wherever we go and sometimes I have to bribe him to get into the car without the shirt and then just bring the shirt with me so that when we get out of the car I put the shirt on him to go somewhere in public oh my and the shirt comes off immediately like before we even get in the house he cannot stand to have a shirt

on I've heard people say that about kids with closed period and then people having kids that like refuse to wear shoes and I'm like if that was me I would literally lose my shit like God knew better than to give me a child like that because I would be like you're wearing these fucking shoes yeah sometimes yeah but you got to choose you got to pick your battles and the shirt thing I'm like you know what I'm not fighting you to put the shirt on but when we get there you're putting the shirt on and he'll be he'll move nine times out of ten he's like okay Jackson was so funny this morning he was like he has this dog man

shirt we talked about dog man before like it being books okay well so Will's mom bought him a dog man shirt and I guess she ordered it like off of Amazon or something like that books a million maybe and I guess he told Will that he wanted to wear it to school today and maybe it just didn't get relayed to me or something so obviously I was the one that got him dressed and it wasn't the dog man shirt so Jackson's walking around like a sour puss like all morning before school and he's like nobody even listens to me I wanted to wear my dog man shirt and now I have to eat six pancakes because my dad makes me eat

six little pancakes in the morning and it's like does sometimes your kids wake up and they're like in such a good mood and then sometimes they wake up and it's like no matter what you do it's wrong yes why is that I don't know I could never I don't know I don't know do you have any kids that are more morning people than the others Lincoln is a morning person through and through he will wake up and just be on go and then Lux he will sleep in but when he wakes up when he when his feet hit the floor in the morning he doesn't stop until 9 p.m. hell no I'm like we all need breaks like

yep you've been talking to me for five hours straight you've ran out of words you ran out of your limit for the day have you ever told your kids that they have a word limit no but I need to because Lux never stops talking I'm like and do you not get tired uh no Lux never gets tired and they don't ever get tired of talking that's for sure I'm like why why are our children this way um okay I've got to tell you about this because I've been wanting to talk about this for literally since I got back from Philly because I think that's when I saw the article it was in the Tennessean and it is about a man who

knowingly exposed women to HIV I've heard about this but what you you read this or you watched it no I read this is there something to watch no I'm I've just I've heard this somewhere I don't know if I read it somewhere or heard it but I've definitely I vaguely know what you're talking about because this is a recent arrest like October 15th ish kidding I'm just kidding I don't know about this then I've heard about this in the past like something similar so little cliff notes a fellow softball player who had been sleeping with him for years brought charges after contracting HIV and it's a felony to be

an HIV to be HIV positive and have sex with someone else without telling them first that you have the virus police prosecutors and victims hope other women who have had sex with him will come forward a Nashville native who wrote a book about catching HIV from a prince charming in 2003 identified him as the same person in court last week but this was like October 15th ish so it says authority last week locked up an HIV positive man they believed may have infected dozens of women by having sex with them without first disclosing that he had the potential life-threatening virus now police prosecutors and two

victims are urging women who have had sex with a man 41 years old active in Nashville adult softball league for years to get tested for HIV metro police and the DA's office also said they will pursue additional charges against him if more sex partners come forward yeah so it says that he had had sex with as many as 19 women in the last two years so yeah no my thing is first of all he was in a men's or like a co-ed softball league who does he think he is first of all like why is he even playing in a co-ed softball league I'm just I'm confused as to what is that like a mental thing where like he feels like

because he has to suffer quote-unquote suffer and live with the disease that he wants to pass it on is it like a like like that kind of situation or he just doesn't give a fuck I mean I've heard of stories like this before not like to this degree but about it being a felony if you know you knowingly have HIV or hepatitis B or C and then you have sex with someone without telling them your medical condition prior than it is a felony offense in this situation I read more into it and it was saying that at first he tried to deny knowing that he was HIV positive but then when his medical records once they were able to

go into his medical records it was proven that he had received some type of treatment over a period of time so obviously you know he knew it's just so crazy to me we've talked about this so many times but just with technology and how everything's so accessible these days people thinking that they're gonna get away with something is just stupid yeah I mean no we have too many too many too much information and too many ways to get information for people to actually get away with these things like I don't know that's weird to me it's so strange and I feel so horrible for the women that we're out here having sex

with him and just not knowing and now their life is forever ruined wait so that you said that this one was last month yeah it was in the the Tennessee and like like Nashville area okay cuz I knew I I knew I had heard of this something like this from last year and this one was from this time last year where and I might have talked about it on the podcast I don't know if we did oh well I don't I must have talked to somebody about it but he that was released in December man arrested accused of knowingly spreading HIV to two people so that was I guess a different story but a 32 year old Mississippi man

oh yeah so see this this is a different one okay okay so yeah I mean this happens more often I guess than you think but that's that's really it's just scary but I mean it's another reason why we you know we shouldn't be having unprotected sex with people for sure you know for sure that's why I'm like well especially especially I knew you're gonna correct I don't know how to say it any other way so just everybody just fuck off I just feel like also with so much knowledge now just like I said with technology with whatever we do have access to so much that if you are out here having unprotected sex with someone

that you're not you know like in an exclusive relationship with or whatever there are so many risks that are involved I just think it's reckless to do that just something I wouldn't do but you know it to each their own if you out here doing it then you know there's right there's risk involved with I guess everything that you do right you sent me the article about she's her own twin yeah okay so tell everybody about it because when I was reading it my mouth was like oh okay I'm gonna read like part of it and then so my friend Darcy sent this to me and she probably had no idea that I was gonna read it on the

podcast but okay so it's called she's her own twin it was on ABC news comm so August 15 2006 a woman named Lydia Fairchild was a proud mother who faced the most unusual of challenges she had to fight in court to prove that the children born from her body were her own children so she said I knew that I carried them I knew I delivered them there was no doubt in my mind she had a fight for the kids unemployed and applying for public assistance in Washington State everyone in her family had to be tested to prove they were all related the Department of Social Services called Fairchild to and told her to

come in immediately and she thought it was like a routine like meeting with the social worker or whatever but it turned into an interrogation and then to her surprise she basically became a criminal suspect and they basically thought that she was a surrogate to her like she was a surrogate carrying the twins if that makes sense so that the egg and the sperm were not well I guess the egg wasn't hers right right so I'm trying to get down okay so the DNA test challenged everything about all of this so it says yes her boyfriend was the father to the children and yes they were related but according to the DNA the

mom's DNA was not in the children how does that freaking happen it says Fairchild was certain a mistake must have been made but she recalled the social worker saying to her nope DNA is 100% foolproof and it doesn't lie Fairchild was not only denied government assistance for her young children but she was now suspected of possibly acting as a paid surrogate mother and committing welfare fraud Fairchild said before she left the social worker told her you know we're gonna be able to come get your kids at any time so she became she began to panic she rushed home to search for the photos of her pregnancy and found her

children's birth certificates and obviously she told her parents and they couldn't believe like the test results and she said that she thought they were joking but at the end of it I'm not actually don't even know how they like it it says battling in court attorney's fees I don't remember how it all did you read the end because it was so long yeah it was so long I I don't know I don't know that it gave a and did it did it say like the full thing after an extensive search doctors found a sample of her thyroid tissue saved in nearby lab in the Boston area according to all this piece of tissue was the key

to solving the medical mystery the DNA would match her son's DNA wait the DNA that would have matched her son's DNA could have been anywhere in Keegan's body but her thought her thyroid was where she matched her son's genetic code the mystery was solved in a way Keegan was her own twin so in her blood she was one person but in her tissues she had evidence of being a fusion of two individuals what it's essentially it's the same thing it's kind as it's chimerism the same thing as Taylor yeah that is nuts yes so same kind of thing we had Taylor on the podcast what I guess in 2018 yeah and she was her own

twin so essentially if she was to have a child you know she doesn't know if her twin that she absorbed in the womb what would be hers or her sisters technically with the DNA situation so it was the same kind of thing I'm actually I'm gonna forward that to her and see if she's part of it that is so freaking nuts yeah could you imagine no and then you're fighting for like your own kid yes that's insane no I guess like you would absorb the twin and then you have two sets of DNA yeah okay so that's how I remembered it too that's so crazy okay so before we get too far into just rambling about our bullshit I had

promised on Instagram that we would talk about the holidays this week and how people spend their time and if they split time and what it looks like for family estrangement and if you don't get along with your in-laws and just like what does that look like because I feel like the holiday times I know that I have a weird situation but I feel like probably more people have weird situations than don't have weird situations does that make sense yes I never really had I was never I was always fine with Joe's parents and like his family I was pretty much always fine with Hobbie's parents and his family

and then like Chris's family was just like hit or miss but like never really like full-on arguing hated each other kind of thing so I don't really know what that would be like to have a mother-in-law or an in-law in general that I like dislike and can't get along with to save my life like that's never happened to me and I would be very afraid of that I think ever since Will and I have been together will never got along with my side of the family or they never got along with him so and never was really a thing I think maybe our first or second Christmas I think we might have gone to my parents but I don't think

it was on Christmas day or Christmas Eve I feel like it was just like to celebrate Christmas and we just exchanged gifts but I know some people do split holidays where it's like you know on this year we're gonna spend Christmas with mine and Thanksgiving with yours and then next year it like alternates but then that gets tricky whenever there's like multiple siblings involved because then if everybody is paired off or you know married off whatever then you would all have to be on that same schedule to always see each other on like the alternate holidays I guess right yeah so then that's tricky too and then just the

fact of like a strangement and just maybe not getting along with people and like where at what age do you just kind of like age out of just going to save face does that make sense yes like it at what point does that happen and so I think at 31 I'm there and officially this will be the first holiday Thanksgiving will be the first holiday that I have not spent with Will's family in 11 years so oh yeah so it's a big deal and I just I don't know we've struggled with this since July as you guys know I've talked about it on the podcast misfire text it's just one of those things that I think and it's caused some like issues between I

won't say like issues but just some hard conversations between Will and I because the way I see things and the way he sees them are consistent in a sense but the way that we handle things are a little bit different and so I think a lot of people can relate to the fact that like if my parents did something I can forgive it a lot quicker than he could and same thing goes for him like with his parents he right right right is gonna address whatever but then they're just gonna pick up and move on and it's just not my parents so I'm just not gonna do that and I think it goes back to boundaries and in my specific situation

if I had a standard for my own family I just don't feel right having that standard for my family and holding holding them to that and following through with that but then allowing some things that my family also has contributed to his family's contributing to and then just overlook it for the sake of peace like if I was gonna do that then I would have also done that with my family right it's it's definitely weird I think to your point you can definitely I definitely see how someone could forgive their own family sooner than the other person's family at some point though are you just like our both

parties just like okay we're gonna just do our own thing and not argue about this anymore I'm not gonna like you guys know I don't do holidays anymore it's just like one thing that I've just phased out of my life completely but like do you just not go to either family and just be like you know this is something that we can't agree on so we just don't go or like does he go to his families for holidays by himself then or like what does that look like well then I kind of get to a point where as much as you can love someone if you don't have a support system like on either side then it makes it very hard for the marriage or the

relationship because it's a divide and so it's like a complete divide down the middle and I don't want a situation where it's like you know I'm picking my wife or I'm picking my family and then years down the road the other side is gonna have to deal with the resentment because the person's going to feel a sense of guilt maybe later down the road like well you know I maybe should have done this or that differently and I just think I'm at a place in my life that I don't want to be responsible for somebody else's actions or feelings and so I don't know I feel like I may I drew a line in the sand when it came to mine and

so if what applies for mine should also apply to yours and if we can't meet on that then I think we're kind of like at a stalemate okay I mean I think that's fair everyone's gonna have their breaking point and what they feel like works best for them I always it's kind of like the only thing that I am able to relate this to is like the religion thing for me it's like I'm not gonna go to church with you but like if you want to take the kids and go to church like by all means like I think for me that's kind of what I would do it would be like I'm not gonna go but if you want you you and the kids can go and set up a time

like the go go ahead you know what I mean like you don't have to choose between us but we got to come up with like some type of like what is it called a compromise right and I guess for me because I have done it for 11 years with Will's side of the family I'm just like I have invested so much time and so there is a lot of resentment there and I'm just unwilling to back down from how I feel and I am convicted and what I know is right and what I know is wrong and I'm not going to back down from those things just to go and spend time on a holiday because then I also feel like that makes all of my points and progress

through the year invalid okay you know it's like I'm sucking it up to go and be around people who treated me bad all year and that's fair I feel like every yeah I mean it just it just is you know it doesn't have to be right or wrong in and you know that this is the best decision for you so that's just what it is and then you know Will and I talked yesterday and it's just his point is okay well they're making an effort because they're trying to have small talk and they're trying to mend the fences and whatever and it's like I get that but also you have to respect that I'm not in that place anymore like you

you've shown me so I'm gonna believe and I'm not gonna go down the path to get hurt again or to just like pacify whatever so that there can be peace because I honestly would just rather have an honest relationship of no relationship than having a relationship based off of like false pretense I guess right well no one wants to go be somewhere and be uncomfortable and have to like sit there and weird silence and like fake just like fakeness like nobody wants to do that so I mean hopefully will respects that like you don't want to even deal with the whole situation and I mean he says he's not

going either but like how long does that go on like is that just for this year and you think I'm gonna change my mind next year because I'm not you know it's like this is the new norm so you either have to accept that and we have to get past that or we're gonna have to make some significant change so that we can both move on with our lives in a constructive way that we feel is best for each of us individually and so that's just kind of where I'm out with it and it just I think we've talked about this before too and and some people will be able to relate on certain levels just as far as like being an

entrepreneur and a more what do you call it like a not conservative but like a nine to five what is it called traditional like a traditional career and so I think that has also built some resentment over time because it's like I can no matter how much I do and you know I could hang the moon and it's because I'm not doing it in a traditional way then it's almost overlooked and it's like oh well you have this kush life and you can do you know like whatever and yeah I do have a great life but also there's a lot of suffering that comes with that life and there's a lot of criticism that comes with that life and there's a lot

of other challenges that come with that life that you're not dealing with in your traditional job because you can separate job and personal life right okay really quickly I just want to talk about this new product that I've been using for my laundry and it's called true earth laundry strips they're super convenient there's no waste they're pre-measured and it's like literally a strip of laundry detergent 700 million laundry bags end up in landfills every single year plastic bottles take thousands and thousands of years to decompose true earth's packaging is compostable and recyclable helping

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help those in need true earth has a risk-free purchase so if you aren't satisfied they'll give you your money back it's obviously a no-brainer and at the very least you can just give them a shot and if you don't like it you get your money back so we have 10% off your order just head to www.truetru.earth and use promo code convos at checkout that's www.truetru.earth true.earth and if you have any questions send a message to at TRU Earth movement on Instagram that's at TRU Earth movement on Instagram yeah I mean I definitely agree with you there and you know I'm in kind of in the same boat and

that's on that note so I just it's it's weird to me that they would and I don't want to say they but it's weird that there would be judgment from that you know what I mean like everyone's different I don't know why we're still judging it's fucking it's almost 2021 why are you I get paid in real money folks like I don't know what you what you want from me I it's not monopoly money no it's not monopoly money you have you still have a degree so in the event that you didn't want to do this anymore you could go get a nine to five if that's what you wanted to do but you don't so that doesn't mean that you're

wrong it doesn't mean that you're that there anyone is better than you it's just different and this works with your lifestyle and what aligns with you and your family so like that's irritating because I promise you I feel not with like in-laws but just in general when people look down on me because they're like oh you just have reality TV it's like no like that's not all I do and that's not not all I'll ever do like I have I I have a degree I have businesses I do all these other things and even if reality TV was the only thing I wanted to do so be it like I pay my bills with this money and it aligns with how I'm what

I'm doing with my life so have a great day and maybe don't play at Chick-fil-A yeah exactly well and then I guess I didn't really notice the disrespect until Will's brother got married and now they have a child and it's like okay his wife has a corporate nine to five whatever and it's like oh well you know she has a nine to five so she has to have a nanny and she has to have this but she's also working from home so it's like I get that but also don't comment me with that bullshit sideways because I've filmed on a show with no help traveled with my child in and out of airports with no help and not one single time was

it oh she she might need help no you guys just watch the struggle yep every time every single time I hear you loud and clear I think that's like one of the biggest literally it's so funny that you say that and I yesterday or was it yesterday Saturday I like lost my shit on my kids I didn't like freak out I was just cussed I said the F word and my neighbors next door they know that I'm a single mom of four kids they know this and the dad over there was like do you hear her and it's like you can see me through the trees like you didn't ask me do I need help like don't fucking sit there and act like you're holier than

now because you are not well it's like you I've seen so many things online like memes or whatever where it's like if you see a mom in the grocery store that her kids are acting up instead of sitting there and staring in a judging way just like walk past and be like I've been there I feel you you just want to be heard and I think or understood or like not judged yes and it's so hard and I do feel like because we do put ourselves out there that people think that it gives them some form of entitlement to judge us more than another quote regular human being because we're putting ourselves out there to be judged and it's like my

neighbors don't have the right your in-laws don't have the right like that's not what I've learned what I've learned though is just because they're in close relation does not mean that they are in your circle or should be in your circle this is true you know yeah I learned that the hard way and I'm thankful for it you know I told Will yesterday I said I am so thankful for what has happened and how it's all transpired because there's transparency there not because it was a wanted transparency it was a oops I fucked up and now everybody knows and now she's gonna act on it it's like I don't want

I don't care to exchange niceties the only thing that I am required to do is I have a son I have a son with your son and my job is to be a positive influence on your grandchild and to do the best thing for your grandchild and if that is for him to come and see you but me not have a relationship with you that's perfectly fine we don't need to have small talk during exchanges we don't need to exchange niceties to face fuck each other goodbye goodbye it's a hello hope you're well goodbye that's it that's it I don't want you face fucking me I'm not I'm certainly not gonna face fuck you so I can't stand you and I

told Will I was like I really do wish everyone well and the whole entire situation and all of my situations I wish everyone well but stay the fuck away from me I just like what what brings things to this point for like I know every situation is different but like why does it have to be like that it's like for what like I guess they wanted to feel like they were heard or something I don't even know I mean hell she was talking shit about her own son so I'm like if she'll talk shit about her own son you know I don't stand a chance this is true you know I hope like because I have four boys I never I don't want to

ever be like a monster what is it called a mom stirring law yeah oh for sure I don't want to be that like I want to I want to be there you know as like a second mother figure and like although I don't know though because I don't have grown sons yet so I'm scared for that day like I'm very scared well and here's the other thing too that I think is a very relatable topic that chances are if someone's talking that kind of shit like the misfire text for example if somebody's talking that kind of shit to somebody else about you everybody else should not also feel safe with that person because if they're talking shit

about you they're also doing it to the other siblings and their spouses and whatever because obviously that's that's a comfort that something that the person has become comfortable doing that's not an isolated incident you couldn't convince me it's an isolated incident I know that there's been things that have been said to me about other people so it's like after reflecting on all of it it's like no that's just truly who you are so I just I don't know I guess I'm just kind of at a place at 31 that's like I'm gonna live my truth whether that truth be good bad ugly indifferent whatever you want to call it it is what

it is and I just don't require relationships that are more draining to me that are fulfilling what is that saying like if you're making more withdrawals than you are deposits then you got to go oh that's a good one it's one of those you know so yeah I just wonder how many people have dealt with similar situations because since I posted what I posted last night the amount of messages that I have received has been astronomical and I know family units are just so tricky in general and especially especially especially fuck off with in-law relationships and I just kind of don't get it and maybe if

we're still podcasting when one of our kids gets married we might be monster in laws and like I don't I don't know that I will be because I feel like I'm kind of level-headed and I can see from both sides yeah you know I mean yes and well the same thing for me and that's why I was saying I and I've kind of been through so much in the three different relationships and so I can see I can see both sides of so many perspectives that I feel like I would be pretty understanding and like no like my son my sons they're not gonna be perfect and they probably will cause you know like you guys are gonna fight just as much

because of my son as as they will because of you know their partner so I right I can see very like what's the part what's the word neutral yeah like non-bias yeah and I guess also another issue you know that I just like to shoot it straight so like if yeah and I think wills like well Lindsay everybody's not like that everybody's not you know just like so in your face where you can be like okay fuck you for doing X Y and Z and then you've called him out on their shit and then everything's okay tomorrow everybody's not like that and it's like okay well I don't know how to not I'm not gonna sit there and just be like oh

yeah everything's kosher when I know that you've been talking shit and then if you are so comfortable saying stuff behind somebody's back keep that same energy to my face yeah I am and I know it's hard for you to you don't like confrontation so it's like you might say but I think there's only so much excuse for that right it's like I don't like confrontation okay well then if you don't like confrontational confrontation don't be confrontational behind somebody's back you don't like it when it's convenient for you and that's the part that I don't like about some people it's like you're confrontational when

you're not gonna get called out right but you're it's like you're trying to pick and choose I'm not saying you specifically I'm just saying and the experiences that I have had it's okay you can be confrontational behind my back but you can't keep that same energy to my face why because you know that I don't mind being confrontational maybe that's it I don't know I don't feel like I'm very scary no I know I don't think you're scary it's just I'm I would never want to to be the like you know in there like Karen's asking for the manager or whatever yeah I would never want to be the manager yeah I'm so dead like what

is your problem what is your problem yeah yeah I don't have one I just I need I'm working on my backbone like I'm really working on it you know one time I sent somebody a text this is so mean but one time I sent somebody a text and I was like you need to go search him for your backbone because you hadn't found it yet I don't want to get a text like that could you imagine me sending you a text like that kill you would literally wreck your car if you were driving would I probably would do you know that I almost hit a deer last night you did almost I almost hit a deer it was so insane because earlier yesterday my

friend who lives in Michigan his wife hit a deer and I was like oh my god like I'm so sorry like really shook her cuz you know whatever but it was scary and she flattened that thing so it was I mean she flattened it out and so it's probably traumatizing and you're just scared and then like you you know that's a life you know that's still scary so I've never knock on wood I've never hit an animal a deer in my life and I drive a big-ass suburban but I live on back-ass country-ass roads so I and the crazy thing is as much shit as I've gotten for being on my phone which I try not to do anymore while I'm driving I

was not texting and I almost hit this fucking thing and when I tell you I was literally two inches for it from it the deer ran towards my car oh I know like are they are they stupid um I'm not sure if I mean I guess actually we I was talking about this with someone the other day about squirrels and like how they seem to like dodge cars but being like the worst situations it's like they're scurrying in the road is it the same thing with deers like they're just literally came like saw me on it was I was driving and there the deer was on the right side of the road and then like like looked at me like stopped

looked at me ran towards me and then went to the left like across and I was like what the fuck honestly hitting a deer is like one of my biggest fears I think I talked about on the podcast about how I hit like a hawk or something in my car I don't I don't recall okay well this was like two years ago and it was like the saga of like all of my cracked windshields remember like when I was having like multiple cracked windshields in the same year and it's like obviously I just need to throw this car away okay well it was kind of like one of those situations where the bird was flying and it was like I either

stop and somebody's gonna I'm gonna like dead stop somebody's gonna rear in me or I'm gonna keep going pray for the best and it it honestly sounded like a body like hit my car because the bird was so big and then it completely cracked my windshield but hitting a deer is literally one of my biggest fears and honestly one of my best friends growing up her stepdad was actually killed in an accident from hitting a deer and so they can be very like tragic accidents but then sometimes it can just be like a little bump and you move on but I know my mother-in-law hit a deer a couple of years ago I think before Jackson right

before Jackson was born and it like tore up the front of her car and then one time Will and I went to a tree farm and we were on our way back and it just like did a little boink to Will's car and or his truck and then that was it but then sometimes you see people that have hit them and it's literally like tragic have you ever seen like well I don't know if anyone else has but I'm where I'm from is literally the population is 4,000 so it's really really small and I'm very very country like houses are like miles apart they used to drive with SUVs with those like deer guards on across their sheet oh wow yeah is it like the black

things that like go on the front yeah is that what those are yeah I had no idea that's what those were yeah oh my gosh that's seriously so scary or at least that's what I was told they were for well I'm let me look it up I'm so glad maybe you need to get a deer guard um I don't think that's a thing anymore like I don't know if they even let me look it up deer guard watch it be for like a snow plow yeah dear guard for truck no yeah that's exactly what it is I it is yes I never yeah they have them for like like semis like the 18 wheelers and then they also have them for like Ford Chevy all that kind of stuff yeah I knew that's

what they were for oh my gosh maybe I need to get it your guard could you imagine me driving like my little SUV with like a deer guard on the front no totally something that I would do like also while wearing a helmet like like alright beep beep coming through yes yes so tell me what you have going on for the rest of the week anything interesting that I need to know about um interesting don't know what that is never experience that no I'm just kidding this week is a whole lot of nothing really I'm just trying to I haven't been in the gym for like two weeks and so I'm trying to get my life

back in order for that Lincoln has football Tuesday Wednesday Thursday and Saturday I have an eyebrow appointment tomorrow and I'm also just trying to like I don't know oh oh oh before we go I started watching this thing on Netflix and if you don't mind subtitles it's in Spanish so it's a murderer it's like a true crime murder thing that happened in Argentina so the whole thing is in Spanish but they have the English subtitles it's called Carmel who killed Maria Marta and it's so good and it's like you you don't even expect like what they're all saying and like it's like a family cover-up and

like this huge thing so if you have time it's like a couple episodes or you can probably get like the cliff notes offline if you so wait you're reading the whole time no yeah yeah count me out I mean I kind of like it because I'm trying I'm always trying to learn more Spanish and so I kind of I kind of love it but I'm on episode 3 and I'm trying to figure out like the murder who the murderer was but I'm thinking that they're not gonna ever figure it out well I want you to let me know how it goes and you're gonna give me the full synopsis next week on the podcast okay fine because I'm not watching it because

I just I can't do the subtitles thing you can't I have them on even when the TV's in English I would literally need 80 D meds to be able to focus on the subtitles and then I would be pausing it so I made sure that like I read everything in the right order I'm sorry so you don't keep you don't have subtitles on your TV with English no is that a thing yeah I leave subtitles on my TV all the time why I don't know I didn't I why do you need subtitles it's English I've literally been doing it for so long that I feel like that would be weird if I didn't do it it's like I'm reading a book but are you reading it

are you listening both no that's not a thing nobody does that like nobody kill I literally know nobody else that does this who else do you know that I actually need whose house have you been to that has subtitles on that speaks English that is watching TV in English that has subtitles on first of all I don't go to anyone's house but you can even tell me if you did because it's nobody you know what I want you to ask when this episode drops I want you to ask on the story because something tells me that there's somewhere someone somewhere that also does this yeah like a single person it'll be like one person

I don't know I don't know and then you'll send me that specific comment where you've like searched for hours and found it and you'll be like see I told you someone else does it I'm gonna ask Twitter no no yeah it's not it's not a freaking thing on that note I'm gonna go and sit in the carpool line and wait for my little kid that got punched today to get out of school I'll give you guys an update oh I feel confident that he's fine I'll give you guys an update on that next week and whatever show Kale's watching and subtitles and I hope that you guys have a great week if you have not subscribed to us on the purple

podcast app for iTunes make sure you subscribe you can do that by searching coffee combos click the subscribe button click the fifth star and leave us a written review we hope you guys have a great week and we'll talk to you soon see ya