Coffee Convos with Kail Lowry and Lindsie Chrisley - 133: Kail's Stressful Weekend, Visiting Elves, and Separation

Episode Date: December 3, 2020

This week on Coffee Convos, Kail and Lindsie are back to catch up since the holiday weekend. Kail tells Lindsie all about the wild past few days she had, including some less than fun events that have occured. Then, with the holidays just around the corner, the Elf on a Shelf is making it's annual appearance, and it seems as though some elves have been doing some shopping for props. Find out where Lindsie says those props can be found to elevate any elfish doings. Plus, knowing when a relationship has run its course can be hard. Sometimes you just need a little advice. Kail and Lindsie read a listener submitted story, and talk about their own experiences with separation in a relationship. This episode was sponsored by: KiwiCo, VistaPrint, Man Crates, & Canvas People Have a question you want answered? Want to give Kail and Lindsie a call? Leave them a message at ?(609)-316-0060?. Music by Nathaniel Wyvern. Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License.

Hey guys welcome to another episode of coffee combos podcast good morning that's like me half crying half excited just so you know oh I always like it when you're like slightly singing the intro because I'm like yeah this is gonna be a good day like there's no bullshit happening and then okay when I hear that voice I'm like you're a little worried what happened yeah so okay let me just catch you up let me give you a rundown today is what Wednesday yes I really know but yes so you know we usually podcast on Tuesdays like that's our thing and we were supposed to podcast yesterday so for those who are

listening right now I'm going to go on a tangent really quickly about between Sunday and today so Sun as I talked about before I spent Thanksgiving in Texas and it was like an amazing visit and I got to see one of my best friends after not seeing her for a year the kids hadn't seen each other for three years Lottie dog great visit come home on Sunday and you know I'm just exhausted it was like one of those things where it's like I really didn't want to leave Texas but like once I got up and going and got to the airport it was like okay now just get me home kind of thing so get home Monday rolls around actually I

don't really know what happens one day so just forget that Tuesday yesterday was a fucking shit show so I I was very very very reluctant to talk about this too much but I am obviously selling my Middletown house as you all know and the troll page knows because all the troll pages posted it someone evidently tried to like break into the house and I don't know if it was targeted if it was random if it they just wanted to see like what was in it if they wanted to damage something I don't fucking know so on top of that I was supposed to podcast and I wasn't able to podcast I texted Lindsay I was like listen I got to

go figure out the situation I got to drive up north and figure that out and then I can't podcast today okay so now it comes to the TMI information that I asked Lindsay if I could talk about before we podcasted because my life is a disaster and if there are kids in the car listening I really apologize so I don't know if any of our listeners have this problem but I don't know if it's the older I get the more kids I have I don't know but my periods are so heavy and I'm talking soaking through tampons and pads in less than an hour and this time has been so bad I'm literally changing my clothes four times a day and

that is with changing my would you call them toiletries like not changing my toiletries changing my lady things and I just want to know if like what do I need to do I really really like your intimate like your yeah my intimate that's a good no like my tampons my pads like I'm changing my toiletries like I at this point I'm wearing TMI but tampons and pads because I'm literally and I'm not talking like a little bit soaking through I'm talking soaking through to the point where it's everywhere and it's just so I don't understand I'm almost 30 years old why is this happening to me well okay so I have a couple of

questions okay I'm also eating my Dunkin while I'm while we're talking about this so thank you for giving me the extra time so first of all every time that you have a child I say every time because you've done it four times does this always happen or is this like a new thing I mean it did get pretty bad when I had Lux but now it's like exponentially worse okay so I'm just like I'm changing my clothes at night in like wake up in the middle of the night last night and the night before I changed my clothes twice have you called your doctor to just like let them I'm gonna call I want to call today because you know my

friend my friend Natalie was like okay at this point it's just not normal like it's just not and like I know people are gonna say go on birth control go on birth control but go on birth control and that's fine but like I shouldn't have to this obviously is a problem at this point so like I shouldn't have to like put hormones in my body to stop the bleeding like there's obviously an underlying issue that I need to correct before I go on birth control well right and there's obviously an underlying issue on why you like your body would be causing you to bleed that bad it's Lindsay I and I wonder if that's why I'm

struggling to like I'm so so so tired and I don't yeah like the bleeding well yeah because I'm sure like the amount of if if you're bleeding like that the amount of blood loss I'm sure that would make you exhausted so I just don't know if anyone else has had this problem I'm definitely gonna call the doctor once they well they're probably open now so once we're done podcasting 100% gonna call it's right down the street so but if you guys have had this issue and it was not a major concern please let me know but also if it was a major concern tell me because I don't know what's going on well I had something remember me texting

you the other day and I was like I need to ask you something on the podcast yes and you're so scared and you're gonna be like go away okay so I thought that was gonna be the serious part of this conversation but obviously like your story is way more important than what I have to say so I wonder this every time I get in the situation so let's say you're driving down the road and you sneeze and you hit someone is that your fault you know what that has to be a good question because I thought the same is that your fault I mean if you Google it it's like it's impossible to keep your eyes open while you sneeze so I feel

like no it should not be your fault I've also wondered the same thing about like the Sun when the Sun is literally going down and blinding you at the same exact time like you can't control that I'm like y'all that's God like if I crash somebody I'm gonna be like the good Lord did this to me like and the insurance company is gonna say well I don't care what the good Lord did to you it's your fault and now your insurance is going up exponentially I use that word I mean State Farm is right next door I'll call them up right now and yes I should the eye sneezed on Wednesday and almost crashed into someone and so because my

eyes were closed and the good Lord did that to me and I need to know if my deductible is gonna go up if I hit somebody right I mean that's a good question I feel like that's a really good question it really is and then obviously I asked a couple of people that don't podcast with me and they were like absolutely that's your fault Lindsay like if you crash into somebody for any reason then it's your fault and I'm like okay well we'll find out from State Farm so you know what's actually crazy that you brought that up is when we were landing in Texas and my friend picked us up from the airport someone

actually hit her did they sneeze I don't know I mean probably cuz they drove off and didn't give a fuck so yeah probably oh my gosh you guys were in a hidden run well okay so this is what happened we were getting off the exit and a car from the right literally came and cut sterling off and so literally no way around it she could like she wasn't gonna avoid it so either she was gonna hit that person if she didn't stop or if she stopped then she was gonna get re-arrended which is exactly what happened but this person like literally flew out of right out of right field is that a thing right field instead of left

field I mean sure like it's a thing since we just did it and so we felt really really bad for the girl behind her because normally when you get re-arrended it's that person's fault but sterling was going to get either she was gonna hit the car in front of her or you know what I mean so it's just not great so yeah speaking of of getting in a crash that's and knock on wood though I haven't been I just knocked so that was me I I'm not a great driver and I actually haven't been in any accidents lately so besides that one but I wasn't driving well you know I'm glad that you haven't been in any accident so we talk about me hitting the

teenager on the podcast I think we did it didn't um what no yes we did liar no we didn't mm-hmm yeah so over the summer you hit a teenager yeah I'm like they were walking like a pedestrian like a teenager driving a car you might have talked about this I don't recall well I hit them in front of a Costco of all places and thank God the people were nice but I felt so bad he was so chill about it too when he got out of his car he was like oh I was just coming from hockey practice it's not a big deal like what and he was like it's just no big deal yeah and I'm thinking to myself this is a Saturday this is the first thing

that happened to me like I woke up took a shower and fucking crashed into you so this is kind of a big deal to me like I was just coming from hockey practice like I was just going to get some food you know and I'm like okay you're like okay and like the whole front of your car is like hanging off but like it's not it's not funny but I'm glad that he was super chill about it because it could have been worse me me as well I'm so glad and I didn't get ticketed so you know like that made it even better and then you know I only did like four thousand dollars worth of damage to my car so you know it's like whatever oh I at this

point I don't I've said it before on this podcast at this point I don't even fix the shit on my car like when people I'm sure like shopping carts have ran into my truck and there's like little dents here and there that I have no idea where they could have possibly come from and I'm just like what the fuck ever it's so funny that you say that because yesterday I went to the grocery store to grab a few things and like back in my teenage years I would have parked like the furthest thing away from any cars that looked like they could possibly damage my car or like where they store the buggies like in the

parking lot the buggies the carts yeah the buggies I would have parked anywhere but beside there yesterday I literally waited on a minivan to pull out of the spot beside the buggies so that I could park there so that I could walk a shorter distance because it is so cold in Georgia it's so weird the things that we like value and like also devalue whenever we become older yeah for sure it is weird how things change actually speaking of that so do you know who Billy Eilish is I mean I've heard that name but I don't really know who it is she's just so cool to me like okay so she's a singer I guess based on

what I've heard she started singing like she became let me start that she's so famous she's so she's 70 million followers on Instagram oh my god so she is I think she's like 18 or something and she started like becoming more well known I guess when she was 13 or whatever and my friend I was like she's so cool like she's so badass I just love her and my friend was like that I guess they do like this interview that around the same time every year and see kind of like how her answers change like they ask her the same exact questions yeah we should do that we should definitely do that on the podcast that's so interesting you know

that yeah like a Q&A yeah but I feel like to your and see how much we change I feel like when you're asked a question about something that it's not always like a definite answer it's like that might be right like at that time but it might change like a year from now because I do know yeah just going through therapy and stuff I do know that the way I would have responded to something even three months ago is different than how I would respond today oh a hundred percent a hundred percent and yeah to that point actually had a question because somebody messaged me and asked me and I was like oh well I just need to save

this one for coffee combos it was do you think that money buys happiness and I have a very like like strong belief about this let's hear it cuz I also have feelings on this okay so I was actually talking to Will the other day about it without even knowing that this person had sent me this question but we were talking about like our old house and just the fact of everybody knows we've talked about it on the you know podcast before that I'm in the process of land and building and Kale's to going through that same process and stuff so it was just kind of like a common conversation that we're having about moving and you

know all these things so we were talking about our house that we live in now and then like compared to our first house that we built which was like 1,800 square feet it was like tiny and it was super cute but it was little and I was telling him I was like I sometimes miss that house and he was like why do you miss that house like you have so much better now than you did then and I was like I don't know it was just like the times were so much simpler and so yep I just feel like sometimes when you get in the race of like feeling like you need to get to the finish line and you it's great to have goals and I agree with that

but I think sometimes when your whole focus is just like okay I need to be in like my forever home by the time I am 32 or whatever and it's like everything revolves around like a monetary value I feel like you lose so much in life it's like yeah things might be easier in the sense that like you don't have to worry about your bills or you don't have to worry about certain things that come along with having access to a little bit of money but I do think that there are more problems associated with it than there are benefit oh a hundred percent at to your point like does money buy happiness no but does money relieve a

lot of stress yes it can and I think that that's like a huge misconception with people that think oh well she's got money you know that makes things so much easier this that or the third it's like yes in some ways it can relieve a lot of stress but in some ways it can create a lot of stress and this is coming from someone who owned a 2300 square foot house and then bought a 7000 square foot house and let me just tell you one of the biggest lessons I learned in this is like aside from like don't try to make other people happy to like fit into your life is bigger is not always better and when I tell you I don't think in

that aspect like money did not buy my happiness like I was way happier and just like you said things were way more simple in my 2300 square foot house like I nobody needs 7000 square feet sorry but no one needs it I don't know why I thought that that was gonna be a good idea unless you're like the duggers right like right right right but like someone in my situation doesn't need that and so I feel like yes we've outgrown even 2300 square feet so we're gonna build something that's like happily in the middle maybe a little bit less than in the middle but yeah I don't I don't think money buys happiness and in fact the

more money that I've got that I've made in my lifetime the weirder I got for sure and I I also think that if you have access to any kind of money that would be like more than just like a regular salary or whatever I feel like and you and I have both experienced this that a lot comes along with that right like legal fees well first of all my taxes don't come out of my money so that's also a huge thing that people don't understand is like they see like my net worth or like what they think I make and then they don't even realize how much of that I'm actually like I I pay you know right that we pay that you pay

too I know it's just it's insane but I just wanted to know right what other people's thoughts were on it because I think obviously people that you know are on dealing with hard times financially and whatever they're gonna have a completely different viewpoint because of and it doesn't mean that what they're saying is wrong or not valid and honestly if I was in that situation probably the same thing like my my view might change I just know from the experience that I have had that I find myself missing my old house and just the times being so much simpler it was like I was not just a stay-at-home mom but my

income was minimal like I wasn't you know doing too much and I was just able to be like a little homemaker and do laundry and cook dinner and just take care of my 1800 square feet which seems like nothing now then you know I I might have been overwhelmed being a new mom and being like oh my god I have to clean the guest room but now it's like I look back and I'm like oh wow that was so easy I could have cleaned that house like every single day but yeah I was like I don't find myself missing that house at all actually and I'm like oh well that's good for you will fuck off you know respectfully fuck off yeah

respectfully please do and then that brings me to my next point and I talked about I posted this in my story this week about laundry and if people have laundry days or if people do laundry every day or what does that look like in your house because I feel like it is a big task and I feel like you can get very overwhelmed with laundry yeah and it can get piled up like for me if we don't stay on top of it it could get piled up and be an issue I laundry gets done in my house a couple times a week but not every day okay okay well like three times three or four times a week so part of the time every other week you

don't have two of the boys laundry right yeah it still gets done it was still gets done three or four times a week on that even on the off weeks I forget like what it was like having a little baby and like what laundry was associated with that it's just like more than just like clothes and stuff because I the sheets the comforters that I use throw blankets like what my kids are blanket babies like we just love throw blankets and then I also have dogs so we also have those to throw in the mix and then like I wash the dog beds and it's just you know towels even when the kids aren't there so it usually is like it's a lot oh my gosh

okay so I have to tell you this I don't know what made me think of it but how many people's elves came out because our elf made its grand appearance from the North Pole yesterday and he is officially in quarantine he was sanitized before he left the North Pole but he is officially in quarantine until December the 9th he's in a quarantine box and he has a little radio in there so that he can radio to the North Pole from there I need you I need you to post a picture of the quarantine box I will and you guys I have the cutest things for elf on the shelf I found them on Etsy oh you can buy stuff

for elf on the shelf oh my god okay so I found this shirt for him and it says Merry Christmas filthy animals from like home alone little like tiny things of toilet paper of Lysol of Purell boxes of pizza like the props that's amazing y'all don't sleep on it you need to get on Etsy and you need to get you something because it's gonna make it so much easier and so fun and it's just so themed for 2020 that I just absolutely love it and honestly it probably will be our last year doing elf on the shelf because we in our house found out about the Easter Bunny this year so with that being said

I'm not sure when the questions are gonna come about Santa and elf on the shelf so I'm just kind of really trying to enjoy this last year of the elf until we can't do it anymore and then I will be depressed for quite some time in case anybody cares um my friend texted me last night about her elf on the shelf for her girls and that might that makes a lot more sense now that you say that you can like buy a little stuff for it because I was wondering how her little setup was so tiny oh yeah like the the little props and stuff the little thing yes I'm gonna send it to you right now gosh I just texted it to you she

must have gotten I don't know I don't do elf on the shelf so maybe this is like comes with it I just sent it to you that was her little setup on how she like brought him her is it a girl is that a girl that's a girl yeah so she okay yeah so she definitely got props to which is super cute and listen he was so excited this morning whenever he woke up I went into his bathroom and he was like what is that note and so into it I was like he was he was reading it full force and just so I love that so into it I feel like you should do it for the younger boys because I mean I think that Lux would really get into it honestly but

since you don't do Santa I don't think that it matters though I think it's still and then that made me think we were talking about Christmas either last week or the week before whenever it was what about your little boys what about them are they gonna be with you or is their schedule the same they have to go to their dads the court order says that he has a supervised visit on Christmas Eve with Lux it's an overnight supervised visit and then Creed has a supervised visit from 12 to 4 on Christmas day oh wow yeah so yeah you really aren't doing Christmas well I think no either way I think that you

should still consider doing off on the shelf for them only because I think yours would be really funny you because I think you would be so surprised of yourself getting into it like I think you would really get into I'm gonna go spend like hundreds of dollars on little freaking props for elf I know that's why I think it's so funny oh my god I can totally see you doing that oh I just talk about this because I remember that Lincoln had this and now Jackson has it we have we have a dentist appointment today and it's just for like a regular cleaning but sharp teeth yeah Jackson has a shark tooth he does

yeah oh my god speaking of okay so does he think it's so cool cuz Lincoln thought his was so cool yeah he but he is so ready to lose the tooth he's like why do I have another tooth but my another tooth isn't coming out and I'm like I don't know and then I Google they will they will I Google you know and it's like because I I see it like I he brushes his own teeth and everything but occasionally like twice a week I will go in his bathroom and like do like a really good mom brushing and I'll go in and like floss and all of that and so when I did I saw it and I was like oh my gosh Jackson you have a shark tooth and

he was like what and he was like a shark tooth and he's like opening his mouth like all big in the mirror and you can hardly see it because it's just like barely it had barely broken the skin but I feel like it grew in super fast like it was like a nub and then all of a sudden it's like yeah and then I googled like do you go and get your kids tooth pulled like no they'll they'll let them just like kind of fall out on their own and then you'll be surprised how fast that shark tooth because it's the adult tooth it'll take the place of the baby tooth how quickly that'll happen yeah because it seems far back yeah but it

will move so quickly I couldn't believe how like compared to how long it took for the baby tooth to come out I couldn't believe how quickly the adult tooth took those because he lost those two where the shark teeth were yeah lost both of them in the same week and then those shark teeth moved right on up but Lincoln has like weird go ahead what we're gonna say I mean does the teeth look bad now no they just look way like his their adult teeth they look way bigger than the other baby teeth around them yeah okay what were you saying about me but his teeth are so weird so I have a picture that I took last night so

it's so insane that you brought up teeth he has this molar when we went to the dentist in September he had this molar that was like coming up under the gums but like it won't break through the gums and it's like fused to the tooth the molar in front of it and I'm gonna send it to you it's so weird and it won't like it's not coming through the gums but you can see it hold on I'm about to send it to you because it's so weird and I'm like Lincoln does that freaking hurt and it's like he's like that's where the blood was coming from and I was like what are you talking about and he's like it always bleeds what I'm sending you

the picture yeah I'm sending it to you right now and those are not cavities in his teeth don't worry he was probably just eating but there is that middle part if you I just sent it to you if you zoom in there's like a nodule a module a nodule what is the word a module kill module I think it's nodule nodule like a little nub thing in the middle of his and then if that hole it's like it's crooked and then like that whole gum area that's all the tooth underneath but it's like fused to the tooth in front of it oh my god it's you see that when you say fused you know what makes me think of what Matilda and her dad on that

movie where he's like the fibers are used to the head the tooth is fused to the gums yeah the truth is fused to the gum oh my gosh so it's so funny that you say that too because when I took Jackson to the dentist last time they told me that he still didn't have his six-year-old molars oh well I mean I've heard that that's a good thing like the longer the teeth take to come out the healthier and stronger they are that's what I've heard I don't know if that's I've heard that too but I'm like yeah he's almost eight and he still doesn't have six-year-old molars because the reason that I say

that is because I keep asking about like sealants to like put on them put up yep mm-hmm and they say we can't put sealants on cuz he doesn't have them oh that makes sense so I'm like oh wow I just I don't know and then I did a poll on my thing on Instagram about how when people's kids like lost their teeth or whatever and I feel like most people's kids lose their teeth when they're like five or six um Lincoln lost his I guess last year so he was six yeah and that was like the most common answer that I saw yeah but I don't know and then I think I was late too and then I guess Will's dad told him last night that he

was also late like he didn't lose his front teeth until he was almost nine so oh wow okay so I mean there's definitely like a variation in age yeah and then Will so Will said that he was like such a late bloomer and everything so and I think I kind of was too like I didn't get my period until I was in eighth grade so I don't know if that's normal like on track or if that's late or anything like that but maybe since we were both kind of later bloomers yeah then maybe he's just gonna be like naturally a late bloomer like a little bit yeah perfectly totally fine with yeah for sure did I lose his teeth like early Isaac lost

his first tooth I think he was six okay so about the same oh my gosh yeah every time I look at pictures of Luxe with his teeth I'm obsessed with his teeth why are you obsessed with them it's got that little gap like on the top ones and I just love he has little chicklet teeth yeah that's what I love oh I'm like it's so cute I keep yeah he's um I Luxe is I'm curious to see how he reacts to losing his teeth because he's just like you never know what you're gonna get with him and so like I don't know if he's gonna be excited or if he's gonna be like really upset about it I don't know do you feel like he's gonna be dramatic about

it should we be concerned a little bit a little bit oh my god I'm dead okay wait so we have this message that I wanted to read I saved it for this episode okay it says hi ladies I listen to your podcast all the time and honestly it's getting me through some of the worst days this is if this is shared please keep my username private obviously I'm having some extra extreme lows in my life right now mainly with my husband who is amazing and hasn't really done anything specific wrong as far as cheating etc I have an overwhelming feeling our marriage is over but he really wants to fix things and he has way more of an

optimistic mindset than I can put myself into right now I think that we got married young and settled and now we're just living our life so routine I'm 25 he's 27 and I think we both deserve so much more we're supposed to be having fun and experiencing some of the happiest moments together and we have a beautiful child who is my entire world and honestly sometimes she is the only thing that keeps me going in the marriage but I know that that isn't necessarily healthy either Kale when you got divorced did you know what was over and sorry for the rant so okay I literally have the chills like if you

could see my arms my hair is sticking straight up I have the chills listening to that because I know that feeling all too well and I have a couple feelings on this because I totally understand what she's saying and like feeling like routine and that they settled but you know they're in my experience and like going through the whole thing I definitely feel like they're settling and then there's you know there's also like choosing to love somebody right like the grass was not greener on the other side for me yes I got two amazing kids out of it and have lux and creed now but the grass was not greener for me

I feel like the things that I like I'm don't get me wrong I'm happy now but I definitely don't think that I necessarily exhausted all my options like I thought I did because I was so just like over it and ready to get out and I felt like it was over however that being said when you feel that feeling there's no talking you back into trying to make it work you know what I mean like that has to come from within yourself and so unfortunately it's one of those things where you kind of have to figure it out for yourself like you're gonna kind of have to go through the steps to kind of end it or work through it you

have to do it on your own like nothing I say is gonna change your mind I wish I almost wish that Javi and I separated for a while first like yes we were separated legally separated but I wish that we would have and he's gonna give me so much shit for this because I promised I wasn't gonna talk about him and I'm really trying not to but this is like a question based on my fucking experience so I don't I'm not saying I want to be with him that is not what I'm saying I just think that because of the where I was at and feeling like things were just very routine and I you know there was other people out there

and like I got married so young I wish that we almost had been separated and lived apart for some time and if we needed to be with other people and then come back together we would have had that option like okay you know the grass is not greener on the other side and so for you obviously don't know your name but maybe consider doing something like that I just hate to see I've heard so many stories of like couples actually getting remarried because the grass wasn't greener they realized what they had was good and so I just I would hate to see you get divorced and then realize okay you weren't settling you just

needed to kind of change things up a little bit I don't know what your take would be Lindsay because I know you've been separated before yeah so I think my take would be the same take as your take I think it's easy divorce is so normalized in today's society and I think it's also encouraged like you know if you're not happy and you feel like you need to find yourself and you know you're not in the marriage then to get out and I feel like I used that excuse to validate separating and filing for divorce because I separated one time and followed for divorce the second time I will say for me filing for the divorce

and kind of doing my own thing for a little bit definitely gave me what I needed to be able to come back to make it work because I think if I didn't fall for divorce then I think that I would have continued to go through that same rodeo it was kind of like a wake-up call right like oh wow this is gonna be permanent this is gonna be a permanent thing and I just don't feel like will and I are the type of people I feel like once we went through the divorce even if we wanted to get back together I just don't think that we have that we would just because I think you go through all of the motions the trauma the you know

going through custody and all of that I just I feel like we're both hard headed in that sense that that like once it was done I think it would have been done I do think I am an advocate for separating if there can be with a child involved if there can be a healthy separation that it's not gonna affect the child in an extreme negative way right if if so or if you know the ultimate goal is to stay together and it's not because you want to see other people and no one else is involved I would definitely say try counseling before doing anything and sometimes as crazy as this sounds even in my marriage

sometimes it's just nice to sleep by yourself and sometimes like will go to the guest room or I'll go to the guest room and it's not because anybody's mad it's not it's just like there's a comfortability level they are like okay you need a break you need to have like five minutes to yourself you need to sleep in a bed by yourself I also say that it's sometimes nice just to go to a hotel and like sleep by yourself and to have right you know no interference you don't have to worry about you know somebody tossing and turning all night you don't have to worry about you know someone potentially trying to wake you

up to have sex that might be too it to TMI no but it happens I think too there's a lot to be said about like well I've lost my train of thought of just while you're thinking while you're thinking about your next train of thought I also was gonna say too that I think it also has become so normalized that people don't get married as quickly in today's society and are kind of doing their own thing so I feel like the people who make the decisions to do it younger then once you kind of like get settled into that routine then a lot of your friendships this was true for me that a lot of your friendships that surround

you ultimately have to change because the people aren't going through the same things that you're going through and so I think that's hard I think it's hard to watch other people it's like oh I found my person and I married my person and you know we went through the exciting times and now we're kind of settled and now I'm watching everybody else have bachelorettes and you know doing all of these things or you know just living the single life and going out and doing whatever and I'm sitting at home on a Saturday night so but it doesn't have to be that way like I think that that was a huge thing for me too it was like I was

expected to do certain things because I'm a wife now but people forget that times are changing and that I'm still a human so I should still get to go out with my friends and I don't necessarily need to be home to make a hot meal at five o'clock on the dot like that's just like not a thing for me anyway I don't still don't remember what I was about to say I definitely agree that people are not getting married as young so that definitely is I think something to consider so that once you're like settled in you almost feel like you settled kind of and just like grow apart too I don't know I think there's a lot that

can be said about this and there's a lot of different things but I think once your your mind is kind of made up it's kind of hard to go back to the idea that maybe it could still work and I completely understand when she's saying like she her husband is like more hopeful than her because I feel like that was like my situation too right yeah and it also is really hard when you have one person that is on one playing field and feeling one way and another person being on like the opposite because as much as you guys want to be a team and you want to be on the same team it's almost like okay well that's not where

I'm at and that's where you're at and just finding like a level of respect there because it's almost like the person who really wants it has this expectation for you you know that because they want it that you also should want it and so right I think just finding like that common ground of being able to have mature conversations will and I have conversations all the time even if we're in a good place you know it's like this is something that bothered me and ultimately if I don't talk about this even though this is a hard conversation we need to have this conversation because it's just going to

fester and then eventually it's gonna become something really big and then that would be like a big problem so right I think communication in relationships too is something that a lot of people is a big deal just kind of like overlook it's like you know sex can't help everything like you know it's nice but it can't doesn't help everything right it doesn't it doesn't all right guys we're gonna take a quick break to talk about one of our partners canvas people if you are looking for a really special gift for the special people in your life you guys have to check out canvas people canvas

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so what's going on in the teen mom world I saw that you posted that oh it's birth was on teen mom you know sometimes it really pisses me off like really chaps my ass when they don't they don't tell us shit when things are airing and so I got an email yesterday right before like the episode aired and it was like oh you know like basically saying that Creed is born tonight and so I was like oh wow and we had football so I didn't even get a chance to watch it although I caught like the last half of it but I was I was super excited to see the episode I'm gonna have to like find it on demand or whatever and like replay it

so I can watch it but Creed was born last night on teen mom and I I wish that they were able to show more of my home birth and I wish that they would have made it more of a big deal because that was the first home birth that we've had on the franchise and so I don't know I'm pretty proud of it and I wish that you know they would have shown more I definitely talked way more about the experience and like how my body knows what to do and like all of that and so I really wish they would have elaborated and showed more of my diary cams but I guess they just didn't well I guess also I mean I didn't see I saw some of the

stuff that like you have had sent me and stuff but I think that maybe time wise or like footage wise or something maybe that's why they didn't but I also agree that it's kind of weird with it being like a first experience for the franchise that somebody's doing a home birth it just really sucks the fact that it was the first time anybody on the franchise did a home birth and then it also was during coronavirus so that's it would have been nice you know I don't know but then it it might have taken away from the experience a little bit like having the crew there and whatever so it is kind of cool that all the stuff

was like within your control yeah that's true that is true you know it's like yeah you you have to like think of multiple things like okay well if they did show more then that would have meant that the crew would have all been there and that the experience would have been a bit different so right right right right I don't know I just my one of my girlfriends is doing a home birth and I had seen like two girls on Instagram I don't even know what their names are but I was like I saw that my explorer page that did home births like in the pools and stuff and as cool as the experience looks and would be so cool

to be able to be like yes my body did that and I did a home birth I just don't think that I'm cut out to do that my idea is taking like gift baskets of like snacks and stuff to my nurses that are medicating me and you know just like being in a hospital yeah yeah that's my jam but you know to each to each their own if you feel like you know the home birth thing is is for you then you know it's for you oh I also wanted to tell you that I don't know if you do this but I started journaling and I feel like it's been so good for me you have I love love love writing and I'm telling you it's like literally therapy when you

start and once I don't know if it's the same for you but I've said this a million times like once you get it on paper and it just kind of like you stop thinking about it but wait you know how the one time on the podcast you were like but how do you pray do you remember asking that before okay so like I feel like I need to ask you the same question like how do you journal like what do you know what you're supposed to be writing do you put dates and be like today so when I wrote I used to try to do that but it never felt natural to me so like when I started writing when I wrote a letter of love I literally kept a diary

but I never was like today I started it off like I would get like an overwhelming feeling that I needed to write something down or like I don't know thoughts that I felt like other people could resonate with and I would just write it out and I put the date and stuff so when you read a letter of love it has the actual timestamp with it in some of the entries so like I wouldn't be like today I went to the office and podcasted it would be like you know write the date and it was like while I was podcasting and kind of like start it right right right right okay well that makes sense but then it brought me into my next thing that my

mind's never stopping by the way in case anybody wonders because I'm I'm always doing like the next thing so I'm journaling and then I'm like oh wow wouldn't it be so cool if all of our podcast listeners and us committed to like journaling for the year but we've made like a coffee combos podcast journal that would be amazing and for like all of the pages to have like affirmations on them I love that and I feel like that's so important too is like knowing that like you're human and you're allowed to have these feelings and no matter what you're feeling you're not wrong you know what I mean yes yes

that would be awesome if we did that I was reading affirmations the other day and one that I came across of was it's okay to grow slow like everybody's pace isn't the same and I've learned that like areas sometimes it makes me feel inadequate that certain areas will stronger and than I am I know that I have a stronger areas than him in some respects but in some things he's much stronger than me and I have just had to accept the fact that I've been through things that he hasn't and so my life has looked a lot different and so it's okay if I grow slower as long as I'm growing so I think that that is super important

and my therapist told me last week that there was power in the pause and to start journaling and focus on positive affirmations and so I wanted to talk about if we did create a journal how many of you would be interested in doing it and not that we would be like having to share these you know like private you know entries or anything like that but just to like have a journal and know that we were all doing that would kind of like be accountability partners because I think that would be great I agree I think this is a great idea and I would love to hear like feedback if how many of you guys are writers and or

would be would want to write and I mean who doesn't need positive affirmations you know like it feels good to wake up I have this one thing it's like 42 days of positive affirmations that I found and so when I woke up today the one that I read says I choose to be happy and to love myself today but how great would that be to like have a journal to be able to like open it up to be able to write your thoughts but to also have like a daily positive affirmation I think it would be great yeah I love that I think that's awesome that's such a cute idea you're like yes Lisa Frank inspired please honestly speaking of Lisa Frank

did a makeup collab with I saw how do you say yeah more for morphe whatever it is yeah and it was so funny people must know my like my true obsession with Lisa Frank because the amount of messages that I got of the display of Lisa Frank pallets and like the whole thing in Ulta I just want to tell everyone thank you so much that really made me happy and it made me feel like I was back in the 90s like looking at school folders facts you know I yeah I my one of my makeup artists sent it to me and I thought it was so cute it are you gonna buy it yeah I'm gonna buy it for the nostalgia is that how you say that word just yeah

nostalgia I wonder right yeah yeah it's like the memories like the day job not like the that feeling that you get yes I saw she has a artistry palette which I don't know what the fuck that is and then I saw the brushes and I love that it's in Ulta and it's not in Sephora I first of all I didn't even know Ulta sold morphe I guess I thought that was just a Sephora thing oh well okay first of all that makes me think to ask everyone are you Sephora or or are you Ulta because I feel like I'm Sephora I feel like I'm both I can't decide which one I am so I'm definitely both like are you a Lindsay or are you a kale cuz I

can't decide yeah well I mean I need everybody to be at me but also half of the people to be a you because if there was all me is or all use it just you know like it doesn't work yeah for sure oh speaking of made me think of my caption on our post from Thanksgiving where I was like Ashley and Brittany and people were like what the hell is going on is this a crime junkie reference and it's like no no we don't even know who that is we made those names up and we went to Philly because we were on South Street and doing like content for our podcast and these guys came up to us and they were like is asking me if Lindsay

was a model because she was on one of the mosaic walls that was like really pretty on South Street and I was like yeah that's Ashley she's a huge international model and they wanted to take a picture with Lindsay so we gave ourselves names Brittany and Ashley wait should I post the picture of us with them oh for sure no no no I don't that is not a cute picture of me so you can put an emoji over my head and then you can post that no just let me post it it's funny oh my god now that everyone knows the story it's funny they were no you guys they were so serious about like taking a picture with us and I was like

wait do you guys have it was mainly Lindsay it was mainly Lindsay well because you lied and told them I was a model and now they probably were basically being a model you know it would be so funny if they went like back home and showed their parents or like their friends and we're like look we met this model this international model today and what if like they happened to recognize us like what if somebody and they were like wait a minute that's Lindsay Chrisley and then you're and they're like who and then they don't watch the show or listen to coffee combos podcast and they Google us and subscribe to the to the

podcast that would be amazing that would be amazing and then they see their picture like on the gram I think we're the only ones that think it's funny and then what if they took the picture home with both of us in it and they were like hey that's that girl from Teen Mom 2 that has like five kids and her name is not Brittany her name is not Brittany at all actually that would be really funny I hope they messaged us I hope they see this I hope you're this I hope they do too please if you if you see this and hear this please message us we are not Ashley and we are not Brittany but it was funny while it lasted and now we will

forever anytime we ever travel we will forever be Ashley and Brittany so well if you post the picture at least on the story can you please put an emoji over my head fine I'll I'll just put it on the story and then I'll just put emoji over your face just calm down Karen thank you you know what did you put it here did you hear about that Kale what about they're being a lawsuit from Karen's for not using the word Karen what did you know any Karen's I have in my life how many like just like Karen yes no like their names are Karen should we ask okay well I don't know any Karen's so well no I know a lot of Karen's but

like I don't know any no anyone with the name Karen right so can you ask your Karen since you know so many of them if they're offended by being Karen's like are they yes are they Karen are they like Karen Karen like right we need we need solid answers but supposedly there was a lawsuit or something like that filed for the name being used like that so I'm like you know what has this world come to and why are people like this I mean let's ask all the listeners yeah we need to know and if is there anybody that's listening that's name is Karen that is offended by the Karen memes because and were you part of the lawsuit

because I need info how do you come together and file a fucking lawsuit for that that just sounds ludicrous is this a class action against who who is it against and is it like I don't know I just have so many questions about this so facts anyway so what are you doing for the rest of the week anything exciting um no we have football be a football last night we got football tomorrow and Wednesday and then or tomorrow and Thursday what's today Wednesday oh my god we had football yesterday tonight tomorrow and Saturday and then I have some other just like bullshit stuff that I need to get done just like errands and

like all of that good stuff so basically like life like yeah you need to do life okay right yeah I did some errands yesterday and went to the grocery store because Jackson needed you know like stuff to put in his lunchbox and um he sometimes will do school lunch which I was totally against when he started school but I also don't want him to feel like a weirdo like he can never get school lunch so occasionally like I let him get it but then he wants to take it all the time now so I had to go and like get stuff because we were we were out of like some of the things mm-hmm which made me think how many people get the

letters home from school that your kid can't bring a peanut butter and jelly sandwich because oh yes has a peanut allergy has a peanut allergy and like I don't want to be insensitive to people who have allergies because like seriously it could be like a lifelike thing right but I would think that in first grade that they would be able to like control separate them I know my friend son Caden he's 15 and he is very very very allergic to peanut butter but he can he also can smell it from like a mile away which is so crazy to me and he like I'll eat a Snickers around him and he won't he'll be fine he just said

that when he was growing up in school they just had him sit at a different table well and then okay so we had tons of conversations about this in my house because it truly is very problematic because the only Jackson does not eat meat sandwiches so the only sandwich that he eats like he hates deli meat so turkey right right right he hates it so it's always been peanut butter and jelly so preschool he could basically take like snack items like bars and yogurt sticks and cheese sticks and that kind of stuff because he couldn't have a sandwich and then last year he didn't have any allergies so he was good to

just take like an uncrustable or something like that but this year there's an allergy and in my mind I'm like okay well my kid doesn't have an allergy so they should just like put the kids that do at a table together you know so that they're not being contaminated you know by these other kids but then also is that fair because then they're being separated from everyone to make them feel like they're so different it's definitely a weird it's hard because I actually sent you know those like a little like there's Nutella and you can put like Nutella on anything with yeah like those little

sticks like pretzels or like the little breadsticks with the Nutella yeah I had sent that in Lux's lunch at school and they sent me a letter saying that he can't have it because it has it's hazelnut yep so it's his school not free yep but it's it's it's a little bit hard because again it's like one of those things where like I'm not gonna make him a sandwich with bread because he's not gonna eat the bread he's probably gonna pick the meat and cheese off of it so I've been putting I got these like lunch containers from pottery barn yeah and I'll just put like turkey and like string cheese in one of the little

compartments and then I put rich crackers in another one just so that he it's like kind of like the same thing as a sandwich but it's hard to come up with like new options that is like still like a full lunch without having like a peanut butter and jelly like my kids love peanut butter with the exception of Lincoln they love peanut butter and jelly and they can't have it I know so that also makes me want to ask everyone moms who are packing lunches what nut free items are you putting in the lunchbox that makes sense because I feel like I run out of it's like okay well we've done that for like six weeks and

he doesn't want that anymore so then what do you put in there I don't know I don't know because you can't do any of the uncrustables because even the chocolate one is hazelnut so you can't do you can't do that either so and my kid freaking hates sandwich meat go figure so then what a lot of moms do like the little roll-ups so they'll do like a string cheese or something and put like sandwich meat around it like as you know like a little roll-up but yeah that doesn't work for my house either so I'm kind of like mmm yeah we just like eat a bunch of like snack things at school he did yeah he did used to like

salami for like a little period of time which was kind of weird but then he got off of that like really fast he was like yeah mom like I just I throw it away every day and I'm like oh you're like um why am I wasting my time and money well yeah like I would go to the deli and get it sliced and then put it in his lunchbox and I'm like how's the salami going and he's like well I throw it away all the days and I'm like okay so basically you aren't eating yet again got it okay good to know you're like okay on that note this whole time while we've been podcasting I also have been doing my makeup again oh good I'm glad

so I'm glad that you have that type of energy because I definitely do not yeah you know well when I've got a dentist appointment and then like two other appointments that I can't talk about then you know I kind of have to get it together you know I can't go looking like a troll so there's that so I slightly put myself together and I'm gonna take my hair off the top of my head whenever we get off of here and I'm gonna just like put a little you know Jeanette and then call it a day so yeah I hope everybody has a great rest of their week if you are not following us on at coffee combos podcast on Instagram

make sure you're following us over there and then also if you have not subscribed to us on iTunes you can do that by searching the purple podcast app type coffee combos click subscribe click the fifth star and leave us a written review only if it's nice hope you guys have a great week and we'll talk to you soon see ya