Coffee Convos with Kail Lowry and Lindsie Chrisley - 159: Traveling Guilt, Phone Calls, and Football Uniforms

Episode Date: May 13, 2021

Traveling for work can be fun, but as parents it can be hard to travel without your kids. With some upcoming trips for work, Kail and Lindsie talk about the mom guilt they feel when they have to leave their kids at home. Especially when it comes to going places they know their kids would enjoy. And does anyone else hate when you are in the middle of a texting conversation with someone and they call you? Plus Kail tells Lindsie all about the new football uniforms she got for her son's team that has a very special sponsor. This episode was sponsored by: Better Help, The Pill Club, Embr, & Function of Beauty Have a question you want answered? Want to give Kail and Lindsie a call? Leave them a message at ?(609)-316-0060?. Music by Nathaniel Wyvern. Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License.

All right, everyone, we're back with our regular scheduled programming. Welcome to Coffee Combo's podcast. Kill. Is this like a radio show? That's what I'm practicing for, because I will not for, but I feel like podcasting is like radio. You know, honestly, there is a local radio station here and I don't want to call them out, but it's a station that I do listen to. And I will say it's a country radio station.

And they actually do Florida stories now. And I'm like, okay, did someone who runs that radio station, listened to Coffee Combo's and like steal the whole idea? Oh, a hundred percent. A hundred percent they did because I feel like we were really focusing on Florida people. Definitely. And I was just, when I heard it, I was a little salty

about it, honestly. Like I hate when people steal my ideas or like our ideas. I'm not flattered. Um, Lindsay and I, for those of you who got, you guys who don't know, um, the reunion is next week, um, in New York and we are doing an in-person one. And Lindsay and I are trying to figure out the logistics of it. And I just planning for this. I'm like, we want to record with Ashley and we have like another guest

that we're going to have on either before or after her. Um, and we're just trying to figure out the logistics of it. And I'm a little bit stressed because I feel like now I get it, Lindsay. Like I, you know, when like you have a good idea and then like it sounds great. And then when the actual planning of it comes down and you're like, wait a minute, that's how, what the fuck? Yes. And you know what's so funny is over the course of Coffee Combo's, I feel

like there's been a bit of a role reversal with our personalities, but because very early on, I feel like I was so much more high strong and like not laid back or go with the flow. Like I wanted a plan and everything to go according to plans. And Kale was not like that at all. And then like Kale might be at a dentist appointment, getting veneers, podcasting from the chair, like whatever. And me, I'm like, okay, I need a professional studio.

Like I need to take this very seriously. And now I feel like everything has reversed. I'm way more calm and lax about everything. And Kale's like, oh my God, I need a plan. I don't even know where I'm going to put my luggage. Like, do you know what I, where I think it comes from? Because I think it really, my word of the year, which I've said a million times is budget, I think that's what it comes from for me, not for everybody, but for

me it was like, I wasn't paying attention to how I was spending, where my money was going, like my schedule, like it would be like, oh, it's fine. Like I'll just like pay to do this or like, I don't care. I'll just take an Uber, but like not for nothing. But in New York City, you never know what the traffic is going to be like. You never know how long something is going to be. And an Uber can be for $50 to go one mile. So it's like, I am just thinking in terms of like budgeting, you know what I'm

saying? So it's like, do I do some of the stuff at home before I leave, or do I pay extra money for the convenience to do it all while I'm there? I think it's things like that for me that are like, I am trying to be not, I don't know if frugal is the right word, but like, conscious. Yeah, it's spending conscious, I feel like. Yeah. And that actually re-triggered the idea of talking about budgeting on here.

And I know that there's like a lot of transition stuff going on. We talked about christing, um, assisting with the podcast and stuff now. And I feel like, and maybe a month from now, things are going to look totally different in our world. And so we'll be able to follow through with more stuff, but budgeting, I feel like is something that everybody can relate to, to a degree. And honestly, I've kind of found myself looking at stuff like a little bit differently, like, uh, do I need to like go to Chick-fil-A six times this week?

Or, you know, can I like get away with just going three times and eating at home? So I think it's just like relative to different, different people, but really honestly, the thing with the Ubers and New York City, that is so true. How expensive they are to go like one mile. Yeah. Well, and it will take you like two hours to walk somewhere. Yes. And I just like don't want to even think about it.

So, um, I definitely want to like plan it out. I think that it's important for us to like be together, get what we want, get what we need, but like also just like plan it out at least, at least, um, with, with some flexibility, but realistically. And Kale sent me a thing and was like, I'm not going to say hotel names or anything, but she was like, are you saying such and such place? And I'm like, no, like I'm staying in another place. And I could just tell like Kale was like, wait, you're not at the same hotel.

Like please just take me out right at this moment. Like take me out. Take me the fuck out. I was like, okay, okay. This is, it's just a little bump in the road. It's fine. It's a hiccup. Calm down.

It's a hiccup. It's a speed bump. I wanted to stay, you know, I don't get away often. Well, I say that, but then like I go a lot of places, but, um, I don't get away by myself often. So whenever I do, I'm like, oh, I want to stay at like this boutique, like hotel. And it's like very chic and whatever. And Kale's like, uh, I'll stay at embassy suites.

I'll stay somewhere anywhere that has room service or cheap food or convenient. That is very much at my disposal. Um, I can't, I literally, I can't. I can't, um, no, but this actually the whole trip, um, that we planned Lindsey and I planned for the podcast was also falling on the same week as the reunion for, for that reason, because we knew Ashley would be in town. And, um, I just, I, I have to say that I do get frustrated when they, and I know it's not just my schedule, but this is one of those trips where unfortunately it falls

on my week with the kids. Um, and so I have to ask their dad to take them for the week. Um, or just, you know, the three days that I'll be gone, but, um, everyone on the show has a different custody schedule and so, um, or a different situation. And so, you know, they can't just plan it around me. You know what I mean? So it's, um, I didn't even think about that. Honestly, like, wow, that's something that I never thought about with your

cast and you guys getting together. Yeah. So, um, I know that Ashley had told me that she had to come kid free. So then it's like making arrangements for her child. And I know that her, I'm, I, let me not say I know. I'm, I think her and bar together. And so like, what does that look like? Does he, and I don't know if he works or anything.

I don't know who, like what, who provides her childcare. But like for me, um, you know, I, I really only try to travel on the, the days and the weeks that my kids are with their dad. So like this week, my kids go with their dad, Lux leaves tomorrow. Um, and the other kids are with their dad. So it's like, I, I am a little frustrated. And so I feel like I have more planning to do next week, as far as like getting the kids to where they need to be before I leave and before their dads take over.

Um, and it just like gets me all out of like, um, like off my schedule. Well, and because you are so particular about when you have your kids, you have your kids and like, you don't want to be away from them. So I know that's another whole aspect. It's like an emotional aspect, adding into like a logistical thought process. Well, it's just like, I'm, you know, the older kids, especially I have 50, 50 custody. So why would I plan to be away from them when I already have them?

Like when I don't already have, yeah, like I could plan on the 50% that I don't have them. And then, um, you know, Lux has gone from Thursday to Sundays now on those same weeks that the older boys are gone. And then, you know, by the end of the year, Creed will be the same. So why would I plan to be gone when I have them? It just doesn't make sense. And so it is a little frustrating, but at the end of the day, like it is for work.

So it's not like I'm, it's not, you know, just because I feel like it. So, um, you know, I can get paid and pay my bills and do everything that I need to do. And then hopefully it won't happen again until, you know, next year, if there is a reunion or whatever. So it'll be fine. I just, it requires a lot of planning and there is a very, very, very big lack of communication.

And so, um, I, I just got asked today, what time do I want to leave to go to the hotel? And I'm like, um, well, we're now six days prior to me leaving. So, you know what I mean? Like there's just like no communication. So I just wonder how many working moms have mom guilt. Cause I know everybody's situation is different. Like even moms that work corporate jobs, moms who are real estate agents, moms

who are people like us, maybe there's like a select few people, but I just wonder how many moms actually have mom guilt, knowing that you're doing something that is beneficial for your family as a whole, but also you feel guilty for doing it because it's taking time away from spending with your kids. I, I hate it. And so I can't even imagine, I mean, I know they think about all the people that have corporate jobs that have set hours and they don't have control over, you know what I mean?

Like I feel bad too because, you know, I think about, you know, I am blessed to be able to be home with my kids most of the time, but, um, I feel guilty even though I think part of my specific guilt comes from people making me feel like I don't have a real job. And so what I call work to other people may not seem like work to them. And so then I, it, I feel like you're having to overcompensate and like prove the fact that you're actually working. Actually, that was a point that I was going to bring up that sometimes our

work is fun, not all the time, but sometimes there's like fun aspects of the work. So then you almost feel even more guilty because it's like, okay, I'm also kind of having a good time while I'm also making money to provide. Does that make sense? That's literally how I feel. And I should, I need to work on that. Actually, I'm going to bring that up in therapy tomorrow because I feel like I

definitely need to work on that. But I feel for like, I remember going to work at the dentist office over 40 hours a week and we, you know, I knew that I was bringing home a paycheck but leaving my son with, you know, Javi's mom at the time was like, fuck, you know what I mean? Even though I know that I have to go to work to, I feel for all those moms. I really, I really fucking do. I feel for every single one of you.

Like I, it's, it's tough. And so, you know, next week is one of those weeks for me where I feel like, okay, I am taking, I have to do this. I'm actually required to buy contract to do this. And it just so happens to fall on my week. So that sucks. It does. Then I was thinking about us going to California in June, which is so soon.

Yeah. And I feel a total, I know that you can relate to this before I even say it, but I feel a total sense of guilt because I have never taken a trip with Will without Jackson because I always find when I've tried to book trips, like a couple's trip or anything like that. I always find myself feeling guilty that those could be experiences in a place that Jackson would also like. And so I always just bring him on the trip, even if it was intended as a couple's

trip, but then I look at the trip that we're going on in June. And even though it's for work, there's a lot of fun things that we're going to get to do. And I'm just like, oh, that might be a cool place that like I would potentially take my child to vacation. And I just feel like a sense of guilt almost that I'm having an experience that he's not having. Right.

I mean, I feel like luckily for us, I think that we, I mean, if you wanted to bring him, I don't see why you couldn't. I feel like we could, he could be entertained while we're actually doing the, you know, the work portion. And then when we're done working, you guys could go do excursions or whatever you wanted to do. Like I would be fine with that. I mean, I'm not going to, but cause it's like a girl.

I'll bring you bring Jackson. I'll bring, I'll bring, um, I was going to say I'll bring will. I'll bring, um, no, don't bring will. Okay, guys. Um, if there is something interfering with your happiness or preventing you from achieving your goals, better help can help you better help will assess your needs and match you with your own licensed professional therapist. You can start communicating in under 48 hours.

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can get anxiety from sitting in the waiting room. So I get that 110% better help is committed to facilitating great therapeutic matches. So they make it easy and free to change your counselors if you need to. And this is more affordable than traditional offline counseling. And, um, just so you guys know, financial aid is available. Better help wants you to start living a happier life today. Visit their website and read their testimonials. They are posted daily.

Visit better help.com slash combos. That's better H E L P and join over the one million people who have taken charge of their mental health with the help of an experienced professional. In fact, so many people have been using better help that they are recruiting additional counselors in all 50 states. This podcast is sponsored by better help and coffee convo's listeners get 10% off their first month at better help.com slash convo's. Lincoln, um, actually knocked his front tooth out yesterday.

I saw that. Um, so funny because the first two teeth that he lost, he tied the string to a football and threw it and that was before his football obsession. And then it just so happens that his front tooth was knocked out by a football and I've never met someone more proud to lose a tooth by getting hit in the face with a football. So, um, he called everyone.

He called me, he called my friend, he called, um, Natalie, he called everyone. Isaac, he, it was so funny. Did he swallow the tooth? Did it get lost in the grass? Like where is it? I, I really don't know. I didn't ask. He's with hobby this week.

So I, I don't know, but I'm sure I'll hear all about it at football on Friday and he just looks so cute with his little. No tooth. I know what I saw. I was like, it's actually really cute. Um, Jackson's teacher came to one of his last baseball games a couple of weeks ago and I was asking her about kids losing teeth at school and stuff. And she says that she always tells him like, be really careful so you don't

swallow it. But I was terrified that he was going to lose his first tooth at school. And like, I would be miss it. Yeah. So upset that I would miss that part, but will thinks it's crazy because I have the two teeth that he's lost, like in a Ziploc bag. And he's like, why is that something that you would keep? Like that's weird.

But like the other moms do that. Um, I have some of my kids' teeth now because after we had this conversation like years ago, I just like keep the teeth. Are you like hoarding them? Do you know which tooth belongs to which child? Are they all together? Are they in Ziploc bags with names? They're in Ziploc bags.

They don't have names on them, but I know whose is whose. How do you know? Time out. Time out. Time the fuck out. Time the fuck out. I got a DM yesterday that pissed me the fuck off and it was about Isaac's teeth. Oh no.

Tell me everything. Yes. I am going to read it on the podcast, which I normally wouldn't exploit things like this, but it, it really pissed me off. And I feel like I need to talk about it. So I got a message yesterday at 2.18 p.m. from instilis bay underscore. And yes, I'm saying her name because she deserves to be called out. Call her out.

Yes. You should put the same effort into brushing Isaac's teeth as you do getting your hair done. Oh wow. I said brushing his teeth. What? Isaac has never had a cavity in 11 whole years. Lincoln has had cavities, but Isaac has not.

I said the color for him unfortunately is genetic, but it's an unfortunate that you feel the need to comment on something like that. I can't imagine being that miserable. I, that's something that he actually struggles with. Like he, he wants to smile and show his teeth, but he, he actually said something to me last week about the color of his teeth. And I was like, we, you know what? Like don't even worry about it.

I was like, you're going to get braces in November. He's scheduled to go in the middle of November to get braces. And I said, when they take them off, they'll ask you if you want them to be whitened and I don't want to touch them until then. I mean, I believe it or not, like despite the color, they are a little bit, but that's also on Joe's side of the family. Like that's Joe's teeth are the same way. And so unfortunately sometimes people just have like a yellow color to their teeth and

it doesn't mean that there's anything wrong with them. That's just how it is. Literally, I can think of someone that I grew up with that had that same thing, but probably as far as like a, um, dental standpoint, probably had actually better teeth than I did. Cause I'm always getting cavities, but like my teeth are white. Same. So much. I had a lot of cavities growing up.

Like I, and not because I didn't brush my teeth. I just like, it would be like between teeth or, you know what I mean? I just feel like cavity prone and Lincoln has had, I think two or three cavities. So it's like, I, I actually rude for someone first off to do that, to target a child. No, they think they thought they were targeting me. They thought they, they thought they were going to hurt my feelings. I'm, I actually take pride in the fact that I make sure my teeth, my kids teeth are brushed all the time.

You know, like I, that's something that I never, I never struggled with, but unfortunately for, you know, for Isaac, he, he has that and, um, I just felt like you, you fucked up because you tried to target me, but you came at my kid. So again, it's one of those things where like maybe don't say anything because you don't know. That's so hurtful and rude though, just in general, and actually it made me think about a conversation that I had a couple of years ago with a friend. I'm not going to mention who they are on Instagram, but someone who was on a big show and stop

posting photos of their child on Instagram when they started going through an awkward phase because people were so mean. And it's like, why is that something that we have to think about that we can't even post a picture of our kid because we're afraid someone's going to make fun of or be harmful and it's so harmful as a mom to like hear something negative about your child. It's just like something just like doesn't sit right. It's even if it's coming from a person that you don't even know, like you, you grow a tough skin when it comes to you, but when it's your child, it's a whole different thing.

Actually I remember years ago, um, Snooki wasn't posting pictures of her kids for a long, long time. And then I went through, I don't remember what her reasoning was, but I want to say it was something similar to like what you just described. And then I also, like there were so many comments. I don't remember about which kid or why, um, but I stopped posting pictures of Lincoln and Isaac for a long, like months and months because I was just like, this is not, they didn't sign up for the exploitation and they didn't sign up to, you know, now they're old

enough and they like don't care, but, um, you know, it just like wasn't fair for them to read or see, or for me to read and see things about my kids just because people are miserable. Well, and people are so mean to about Lux and Creed and that whole situation and because they think they look different. If people actually saw more than what you just post on Instagram, they would see how much Lux and Creed actually do look alike despite their skin color being different. And it's just like who goes out of their way to like be that invested in someone's life

or children that they feel the need to comment. Yeah. It's weird. It's weird. Weird. Like I don't understand it. I don't get it. And it's just, and I understand in the situation because I kind of experienced this too.

Like Jackson didn't sign up to be on Instagram, you know, like that's not what he signed up for other people who are normal post their kids. So I feel like we should be able to post our kids and be proud of them and like want to post pictures with them. But people are so mean and so cruel on social media that it's just kind of like no wonder Kristen Cavallieri doesn't post her kids faces. Like maybe she did something right. Like maybe she got it right.

That's a good point. That is a really good point. I always thought it was weird that like she didn't. But now the more I think of it for like security reasons, for people not to be able to like make fun of appearances, whatever, like there's so many benefits of that. And honestly, if I'm out in public, more people will recognize me by Jackson than do you experience that too? Yes.

And actually there was a couple of times that Natalie had my kids and she said that people came up. And it was last week or the week before she had the kids for the day while I was working and just the babies and her and both of her sons like took them out to eat or something and they came up to her about the kids. Yeah. See that really, really scares me and it goes into the next topic that I want to talk about because I was, I don't know if you saw my Instagram stories this morning, but I was talking

about abduction and how I had seen this article and I'll read it in a couple of minutes about this local woman from a Walmart. And I wonder about like, I always think about women getting snatched like at night and how dangerous it could be to be out there and like the Elizabeth smart situation, I always like go back to that case. And then people started writing in telling me that we needed to cover the Elizabeth smart case and I feel like we definitely do because not only does she have a book and she's surface actually more in the media within like the last two years than I've really seen ever

other than when the case was active and going on and she was actually missing. But I just wonder if people who are abductors, if they look for specific characteristics of someone like, is it personality characteristics? Is it extremely targeted? Is it random is it like by a physical appearance? Like, I just wonder, I would like to be, I think it's like a vulnerable thing. Like, I don't, I, yeah, I don't, I don't even think it's like just because I was listening to, I listened to Morbid and I also listened to Crime Junkies and actually I just listened

to one yesterday or the day before and it was about Catherine and David Bernie and this is an Australian case and they would just look for, first they tried to put an ad in the paper looking for a roommate, preferably female and lonely, which obviously didn't get any hits. And then when that didn't work, they just started picking up like random people asking if they needed rides. And so I think it was just like vulnerable and alone. Oh, wow.

So Will actually had sent me an email and I don't watch the local news or anything like that, but he had sent me an email and was just like heads up basically, but it says missing woman last seen in Cherokee County areas, officials say it said that they are searching for a woman that her last known location was in Cherokee County, possibly Canton and she was last seen picking up a prescription at Walmart. She was 42 years old, four foot 11 inches, 150 pounds with blonde hair and green eyes and police were just asking for any information of her whereabouts. So like, obviously she was abducted somewhere between the time that she picked up the prescription

and like went back to her car. And I just wonder, like, do abductors go to a specific place? Like did they know that like the Elizabeth smart situation, for example, that was like a very targeted abduction? I definitely think there are like stalking scenarios, like there's some that are they like stalk out their victims and things like that. But for a lot of them, at least in the podcast that I listened to are like, just vulnerable people like in a such like wrong time, wrong place.

Yes. And I'm just like, it's so sad that in today's world and I mean, maybe it was going on a long time ago before social media and before all that, but I feel like because we have access to so much information now that we just maybe hear about it more, or maybe it's just right, more people are more comfortable doing it. But then I always go back to the fact of why would people be more comfortable doing it now when there's so many like security cameras place like things for you to get caught track GPS trackers on cell phones where they can tap it back to like a tower that it pinged

off of like you would have to kind of be like a really good criminal with a very high IQ to get away with something today. Right. That's a good point. Like you'd have to you kind of have to be ballsy, like really ballsy to think that you're going to get away with it. And now with all like the just technology and DNA and fingerprints and just like you said cameras and stuff like that, like how do you, why would you even think that you could get

away with it? Yes. And then someone actually wrote and said that we need to look into Jamie Kloss and how she was targeted and how scary it was. So I'm going to look into that for next week just because I'm not familiar with that name. I know that I've seen it come up a couple of different times, but I'm going to look into it and read about it because supposedly it's like really creepy. Okay.

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will never get off the phone and you try to hang up so many times, but like they won't let you. Do you ever have like, um, like you're texting someone and then all of a sudden they just call you like, please just finish the conversation via text. I don't want to answer that literally just happened to me right before I walked into my office. I was texting my landscaper and in the middle of the conversation, he called me and it, I just like don't understand.

Like why is that a, why does that happen and why is a phone, even a thing anymore? Like, uh, to call, send me a voice note, if anything, don't, don't, don't call me, don't leave me a voicemail, but you can leave me a voice text. I can open it and close it and, um, you know, I'll listen to it when I can without the notification or if ever, well, I was doing so good. I did want to report that I was doing so good on my new phone, keeping up with all my texts, like doing all that. And then I woke up today.

It's about fucking time. I hate you. It's about fucking. I was doing so good, Kail, and I was so proud of myself, honestly. And then I woke up today and had 27 miss texts and I was like, okay, yeah, this is the beginning of the end. Like it, it lasted a good, like, however many weeks I've had this thing, like three. Um, I'm proud of you.

Are you proud of 27? Is that a normal number? Uh, no, but it's normal for you. It's very below what it normally would be for you. Yeah. Like in the 200s somewhere, you know, like I thought about, um, trying to see if I could do the same. Like after, um, I saw all your notifications and stuff, I was like, you know what?

Cause I, I'm a no, it's not that the, I'm not answering the text cause I do that a lot. I open them and don't answer them. Um, but I have a habit of just to get rid of the notification and I, I want to respond, but just to get rid of the notification, I will open the text thread, um, and then I'll not respond, but I also get rid of the notification and that, that'll be like in an appointment or something, and then I'll go to like text that person, um, and I meant to respond to that. I just cannot deal with the notifications.

It's like a subconscious thing for me that I wouldn't even be, I wouldn't allow myself to leave texts and phone calls and all the things, but what is more rude? Is it more rude that you've read it and they're not going to believe you anyway. They're not going to believe you anyway. Cause when someone tells me, when they text me and they're like, um, oh, I didn't even see your text above or like they'll text me and completely ignore that I texted them, texted them 17 days ago, um, I don't believe that they didn't see it. So even whether they do what you do and leave the text like unread until like you go back

into the thread or they open it and forget to respond, like, I don't believe them because I've done both or like I deliberately ignore them or I accidentally like, I don't believe you and you probably don't believe me. So fuck it. I mean, let's be honest. If I didn't respond to you for 17 hours, you would literally send 911 to my house. I would be like, I'd like to report a missing person, please. But the average person that would text me would probably be like, oh, this is just like totally

normal for Lindsay to respond 17 days later. Oh, that doesn't include you. Would you be worried if I didn't respond to you? I freaking told you that one time that I called Kristen and said I was calling 911. I was really sick though. Cause you didn't answer. I was so sick. Actually, that's, I have a, I have a story about that.

Tell me, is it during this podcast? Yeah. Okay. During that time, um, someone came to visit me. I'm not going to name names because that's that part is irrelevant, but I was so sick that I was like barely alive and I had the phone unlock situation where you could like put your face in it and it would unlock the phone. Yes.

And while I was asleep, the person that visited did that on my phone. Wait. And then went through your stuff. They said they, they like second thought, like they had second thoughts once they unlocked it, but I, after they saw that my phone unlocked with my face, um, it did unlock, but supposedly, which I obviously don't believe, um, they did not go through my phone. Yeah. No, they did.

Is that, isn't that insane? They did go through your phone. I hope they didn't go through our text messages. Cause if they did, they would have been very entertained for quite some time. Honestly. They would just be like stuck on our text thread and not see anything else. Yeah. Because I mean, we might be talking about a murder.

We might be talking about how our kids are crazy. We might be talking about trips that we can't plan. Um, there's a plethora of things of topics on there that would honestly, you know what, I really thought about this sometime in the last week to maybe start a thing on Instagram where we screenshot funny texts and put them on our Instagram that we send each other. That would be really funny. Actually. That would be a good, like, uh, because sometimes I get a text from you and I'm just like, what

the fuck? Yes. And then sometimes I know that you get a text from me like yesterday when I was telling you about a song that I liked, you were like, Lindsay, what are you, are you speaking right now? Like what, what are you saying? Um, but yeah, I think we should start doing that. What?

What is that? We should start doing that and not tell each other. Okay. I'm down. I'm definitely down. Cause I think it's really funny. Like some of the stuff I'm just like, people need to be aware of the types of conversation conversations that are going on.

You know, we might be talking about a pediatrician appointment, but then we might be talking about some story that we saw on tick talk that's completely inappropriate and it could be maybe two texts from each other. Like you don't. Correct. You don't really know. It's very random. It's very, um, sporadic, but hey, I do have something to say to you about how excited

I am about Lincoln's football uniforms. Those are so cute. Thank you. I'm very, very excited for them. I, I will say, um, when Javi and I were trying to pick a name for the team, um, wait, this was something that you and Javi came, you need to back up like you and Javi made this team together. Correct.

What? Have we talked about this? Has this ever been covered? I do not believe so. This has never been covered. Okay. Is this exclusive information right now? Um, probably.

I don't. Are we allowed? Yeah. No, we, we are definitely allowed. I am making that executive decision. Okay. Um, explain. Okay.

So Javi just, he knows like, I don't know if he just like the gods of the universe send him notifications for every single tournament in the United States, but, um, he always seems to know what tournaments are going on for Lincoln's age of football. I don't know if there's like a universal website that he like signed up for to get email. I don't know. So long story short, he texts me and he's like, Hey, like there's these tournaments, like here's the list of dates, the places, like whatever I want to sign up the team.

And um, as you guys know, Lincoln, he plays flag football for one league on Fridays and another league on Sundays. And basically what we did was ask, you know, some of the parents from each team and we made our own team. Um, and I, I funded it through coffee combos so that coffee combos could, you know, so that all the players could not have to, they don't have to pay for it. You know what I mean? Cause, um, I love this.

Yeah. Like a lot of the parents have other kids that are in sports and, um, there's all just like a lot of involved. There's like, um, tournament fees, jersey fees, things like that. And, um, you know, I, it's so crazy because I just, I am getting to know each of the players like just from Lincoln playing with them. And I just, it's weird to say, like I love them all. They're such good kids.

They love the sport. And I just don't want their parents to not like, if they're busy with their other kids, with other sports, with work, whatever, like, I didn't want them to have to worry about like financial stuff and like not be able to go or whatever. So, um, so we did that and when Javi and I were texting back and forth about the name of the team, um, I, I wanted something really cool in Spanish. Like I just thought like, I don't know why I just thought it would be like bad ass, like to have something sound really cool.

Um, and Javi was like, fuck no, everyone will mispronounce it. And I was laughing. And so I was like, all right, here we could do Delaware sharks. We could do gators. Like we could do whatever. Um, and Javi and Lincoln, I think I named like a couple other options and they, Lincoln really picked the Gators. So that was cool.

And, um, we work with a really cool guide to like help us design the uniforms and stuff. He did a great job. I feel like he executed perfectly. And I was like, I really want coffee combos on the Jersey and he, I feel like he fitted in nicely. And I'm not just having it like where the last name went that way, the kids can still have their last names on the jerseys and then also have coffee combos. I thought it turned out pretty bad ass.

Can we do like a whole like reels of them playing with these jerseys or like, oh, for sure. He has a tournament on Sunday. The first tournament is on Sunday. I want to get a team picture, coach picture, um, and I got shirts me for the parents. Yes. So we will get lots of pictures and a reel for you guys so you can see, um, maybe like once a year, coffee combos should like sponsor a team or something.

Yeah. We should. Yeah, that would be cool. We should, we should like set it up to where people send in like, what would it be? Like resumes or something for us to like an application, anything. Yes. We should definitely do that. I'm writing it down for Kristen.

Kristen, if you're listening, um, she's probably not, she's like, these girls get on my nerves. We do get on her nerves. Plus her heart. Okay, so was Harvey fine repping coffee combos? Like is that, um, or what did a bone of contention asking for myself? It was not a bone of contention. Um, I, I think for something like that, like he knew that it was for the benefit of Lincoln

and the team. So I think it was one of those things like he, he had sponsored, um, Lincoln's first football team through CrossFit kill shot, um, when I remember that. Yeah. Yeah. So I, and I never, that, I never even had a problem with that at all. I thought it was really cool. Like, um, so I, I, I hope that that's how, kind of how he feels, um, about the coffee

combo stuff. The problem that Harvey and I are dealing with now on a co-parenting level is that Harvey wants to take these kids across America, uh, tournaments. Yeah. Like, yes, he wants us to sign them up for a tournament in Dallas and I'm like, are they going in your camper? Could you, that would be amazing. Actually if I had my camper right now, I would, I would say, you know what, fuck it,

let's take a road trip. Um, I don't know how the parents would feel about that, but that would be actually amazing. Um, but I, I told Harvey, I'm like, listen, they're not, they're not in high school. They're not getting scouted right now. Like let's just stick to like the local tournaments, please. But he's not having it. No, he'll, he literally will follow up every two or three days and be like, the registration is filling up.

And I'm like, no, we're not going to Dallas. Like unless you're financing that one, I'm not going to doubt it because I have four kids I got to take. So first of all, could you imagine y'all going through the airport trying to go to Dallas? I mean, it almost would be worth it for a camera to follow that. I might fund it. Honestly, honestly, like literally. That's really, that's really funny.

Like all of the aspects of that with you and Harvey, I'm laughing inside right now. I just, but I want to know how he, like, does he go on? Like does he Google on a day to day basis, like flag football tournaments? Like what is it? Like I don't know how he knows, you know what I'm thinking, like relating this to when you started saying that I was like, okay, this reminds me of like the bloggers that post all the deals and they all post similar deals on the same day and I'm like, how do they find them?

Like how do they know that a shark vacuum is on sale at Kohl's, right? You know, well, and that's what I said to my friend the other day, I said, I'm actually worried about when I, when it comes time to sign Lux up for sport, like he's in soccer right now, but it's not like a team. It's just like a practicing, like learning to develop mental, yeah, like fundamentals of the game. I worry about when I have to sign him up for football and soccer to be a part of a team because I might miss the, the schedule, like the signups or whatever.

Like hobby is always on time and knows exactly what's what. And I'm just like, I don't, I'm worried because I don't have that. We feel like we're the rejects of knowing the information and he's in the in crowd. You're not even kidding. Yeah. A hundred percent. It's, it's really annoying kind of, I kind of feel like that whenever I see that I didn't post about a shark vacuum being on sale at Kohl's when everybody else knew about it.

All right, guys, we're going to take a break to chat about function of beauty. I know that we've talked about them many of times, but I have a quick question. Which one of these is your favorite scent, mango, rose, pear or eucalyptus? These are just some of the amazing scents available with function of beauty's customized shampoo and conditioner. For those of you who have missed me talking about function of beauty, function of beauty is the world leader and fully customized hair care. They create your unique formula based on a short, but thorough quiz to give your hair

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Just to give you guys a little bit of information, my favorite right now is the crisp pear. I feel like it's such a good, fresh summer scent. So if you guys would like to try it, you can turn your beauty routine into an aroma therapy session, a tropical getaway even, you can go to function of beauty.com slash combos to take your quiz and save 20% off of your first order. That applies to their full range of customized hair, skin and body products. And honestly, I absolutely adore their body products. That's function of beauty.com slash combos to let them know that you heard about it here

and to get 20% off of your order function of beauty.com slash combos. I have a question though. Okay. So what? Um, when I, you might feel the same way about baseball. I don't know. But so in football, like I, I was telling one of the other parents, I was like, I'm going to end up saying hi to these kids, like if I ever see them out and the parents are going

to be like, who the fuck was that? Like, why are you saying hi to my kid? Like I, and I just like, it's weird, but I just, I just feel connected to all the kids on Lincoln's team. And I just like love them as if they're all like Lincoln's little besties. Um, you know what, if your son was on my son's team and I felt that way, would you think it's weird? No, but I've honestly had that same thought when I see other kids out with their parents

and I'll be like, I'm just going to make up a name like, Hey, John, and their parents are probably like looking at you like, why are you talking to my kid? Like, are you an abductor? Like, well, that happened on the field not that long ago. Some guy said hi to Lincoln and I was like, and we, I waited until we were like, I don't know, like 200 feet away or whatever. I'm not going to measure, um, but I was like, Lincoln, who was that? Like who was saying hi to you?

And he's like, Oh, that was like so and so. And I was like, Oh, okay. Like cool. Like, I love it, but like also I don't want to be like, I don't want to be weird. I'm not trying to like overstep or anything. I just like, or like when I'm cheering for, okay, because also, um, I'm like acquaintances kind of like friend sort of friendly with, um, one of the other moms and like if her, if her son scores, I like cheer for him.

You know what I mean? Like, yeah, like let's go and I don't want to weird her out or like overstep boundaries either. Do you know what I mean? I mean, I don't know. I guess like I just, I don't want to be weird. I can kind of like, I, I'm trying to relate that to baseball. Like I do cheer for some of the other, I mean, I cheer for them all, but like, especially

like ones that I'm like acquaintances or like friends with like their moms, like for sure. I'll say their name, you know what I mean? And I don't want to be weird, but like, how do I like ask the mom and not be weird? Cause I feel like even asking the mom is weird. Yeah. I'm questioning if it's weird. It's probably weird. Right?

What do you say? Or maybe you're just overthinking it. Like what would be the thing that you would say to, um, hey, hey, mom friend, um, can I, I'm putting that on a shirt. Hey, mom friend, can I cheer for John? Like what? I feel like you're fucking weird. Like, um, I would be like, because you specifically asked me that, absolutely not.

If I hear you, I'm calling 911 like I will call the cops on you for sure. Hey, speaking of the little shirts, um, make sure you bring me one to New York city so I can rip. Oh, yes. Um, okay. Perfect. I'm actually going to remind myself that because I think they're going to be here. Remind yourself a couple of days.

Yes. I'm going to set a reminder right now. Please do. And also bring yourself one so we can take pictures in them so everybody can see how cool we are. And um, yeah, oh PS coffee combos is also sponsoring Jackson's, um, all star team. And I just think it's so cute. Like honestly finding sponsors for stuff like that is really hard actually.

Yeah. Mm hmm. And a lot of companies like, I don't know if y'all tried to like seek out sponsors or anything like that, but I know a lot of people told me that a lot of local places try to support the local high school teams and not little league. So I think it might be a good idea for us maybe to like put on our docket, um, or our talk to Kristen about supporting a team and like taking applications or something. Cause I think it's really cool.

Yeah. I think, um, I don't know for sure if this is why, but I think a lot of companies, um, they look for it as a way to advertise. Yes. I don't, I don't know for sure. Um, but that's my thought. And so sometimes if there's no advertising or marketing budget, it could be hard to find sponsors or maybe they've tried in the past and they don't get the return that they do

for, um, for advertising. But for me, this was, you know, this was my son and I love all the kids on the team. I want them to be able to play. So it wasn't really an advertising thing so much. It was more like, like a, to make it easier. Yes. You know what I mean? Like I, I don't know how to word that, but, um, yeah.

So that would be really cool. I think you're right. I think, um, cause obviously, you know, you want to, you want to advertise too, but you know, they're for us as moms, it's more about, you know, the kids playing, so, um, I think that would be cool. Even if it's just like one team a year or something, that would be really cool for coffee combos to do. I think so too.

Coffee, coffee combos loves the kids. Yes. We do love all the kids. I love all the children's. Um, hey, so I need to ask if Lincoln has ever had like a mental meltdown about losing. So, or has he never lost, um, he's, he has lost actually, we had a huge game on Sunday and that was like a really point of contention. Is that a word point?

Bone of contention. Yes. Um, he didn't cry, but another player on the team did and it was the most heart breaking thing that I've seen in a long time because I knew how fucking hard they played and I know what it means to them. And it, and if it wasn't for the other team being such assholes and like truly talking shit about our players and our parents, um, I don't think that it would have been as devastating, but it was one of those things where like they were really humble and they're just a

good team and they're a good group of kids and I watched them play their freaking hearts out. So I, I, Lincoln was disappointed. He didn't cry and it, but still it was heartbreaking. I mean, I've always been very supported, supportive and invested in all of Jackson's teams, but I think this team was just a little different. And I don't know if it's because of the age, them really, um, really realizing like the difference between a win and a loss.

Maybe like, I think that doesn't register until a certain point and they don't, maybe like the competitiveness isn't there yet, but this season definitely was and it was our first playoff game and because of weather here, it's been so rainy. And so it went from sink, um, double elimination to single elimination. So they played the best team and obviously lost, but lost by two runs, which is nothing in baseball and basically ran out of time on the game and a bunch of the kids that are also playing all stars on Jackson's team. And some of them because of the age, um, the age range of the team, some of them are playing

all stars on the seven U team and then Jackson's teams, the eight U team, and they were all crying kill and it was so sad. They were like, this means some of the kids that weren't playing all stars this summer, it was so sad to hear them because they were like, this means no more baseball. Like this is, it's over and the only thing I could think of was just like the little kids, like if you've ever watched the sandlot and like a little team that had like bonded and really like put in a group effort to do something and like played their hearts out and put their all into it.

It's different, um, watching when they might not care, but when they actually do care, it pulled at my heartstrings so bad. And then I, I kind of had like this internal conversation with myself, like this is really good for him to have this experience of loss and sadness, but then also I hated seeing him be so sad. I will say that that's something that I not necessarily this past Sunday's game because it was different circumstances, but other times I've told Lincoln so many times because he'll Lincoln knows when he's good at things and Lincoln is, I never want him to be arrogant.

I don't want him to feel like, like specifically on Sunday, this kid was like throwing up the peace sign and like, no, like while he was running and just this child, like that's you, you learned that from somewhere. Someone taught you to do that someone, you know what I mean? Yep. Um, and so that was one of the things I told Lincoln was like, I don't care how good you are at something. You need to understand that at some point there will always be someone who is better

than you at something and you need to humble, you need to remain humble. You need to work hard and if you, if and when you ever do, you know, surpass them in something, you be kind and you just remain quiet and humble and you do not act how you, what you experienced on Sunday, like don't ever act like that. And so in some ways I feel like the lost part of it is, is good for to, to remain humble, to know that you can always do better, to keep practicing things like that. So I think loss is still a really big part of, um, like losing to a team is still a really big part of like sportsmanship and, and building character.

Yeah. I was going to say like character building and there is such a thing like you want to be an instill in your children to be proud of themselves and, you know, that they're putting in their all and that they should, you know, be proud of that, but also there's a difference in celebration and excessive celebration. And I think, um, and really, truly just like cocky and arrogant, really it, it boils down to and there's just, I have experienced seeing that too and it's not, um, I wonder if the parents are proud when they see that, or if it's something that they're embarrassed by,

it has to be like a taught behavior. I would think it is because the coach acted like that as well. Okay. So yeah, the coach was like, Oh, do y'all want to shake this happen on Sunday? Do you want to shake hands? Not? Okay. And he laughed and walked off.

Actually, it's funny that you say that because one of Jackson's little buddies that he's become pretty good friends with over this last baseball season, um, he got off, he got out on first and threw his hands up and his dad literally ripped him a new asshole. Like, yeah, he said, if I ever, I heard him say this, he said, if I ever see you throw your hands up, you're out. When you're out, you get off the freaking field. Like there is no need for you to throw your hands up. Like you were called out.

You're out, get off and get off quickly. But like people, I think people just raise their kids so differently and until you're in organized sports, I think that you just don't really realize the, um, different ways that people parent and how kids are raised. Like it's so weird to me. I'm like, we all live like in the same area, but everyone's so different. Like you have some people that are very similar, but then some like outliers and I'm just like, where did things go wrong?

I think it's, um, important too, because how they handle certain things like that, like loss or kind of like what you just described about, um, getting off the field and getting off quickly and things like that. I feel like, um, you know, how they're taught to deal with things like that, wins, losses, injuries, all of that from a young age is, is something that they will carry with them for, for life and it goes back to even just like the hygiene thing that we've talked about several times is like what you do now will, you know, the choices that you make now and what you do now will kind of be something that you carry with you through life.

And so you want to teach your kids to handle those things in an appropriate way. Um, I, um, I love even, I just like seeing the kids this past Sunday, like they played with so much heart, even though they lost and I was just so fucking proud of them yesterday. Um, and I'm sure that's the same for you and Jackson, but also there's two things I want to say. One, I watched a Tik Tok yesterday, um, and it was saying how, um, you should never tell your child how good of it, like don't only tell your child how good of a job they do when they have good results, tell them how good and proud you are of them for trying.

Because it, um, when you do that, it builds, um, what is unconditional confidence versus conditional confidence? Like they only want to do certain things when they're good at it or when they're going to get good results, but you can't always predict results or control results. And so I thought that was like, yeah, I really loved that and I liked it. So if I, um, if I can go back and find it in my likes, I'll post it tomorrow or today when you guys listen to this. And then the second thing that I wanted to say was something about the field.

Well, I don't remember now. Did you lose the thought? Cause I had a comment to say about the Tik Tok. So maybe you can, can rethink of the thought, but to that point, um, I always tell Jackson because he hates, he really, really hates losing. And I mean, I'm like that too. Like anything in life, like I, I mean, who freaking likes losing? Nobody likes losing.

Nobody. And so I tell him all the time, if you go out there and you give it your all, but you weren't the best. That's okay. So one, like you still win because you put your best foot forward, you put in your best effort. Now, if you go out there and half-asset and you're just like there to be there, I'm probably not going to be happy about that.

Like, and I'm not going to tell you that I'm going to be proud about that because I know that you can do better. And when you know that you can do better, you should do better to be better. Um, but yeah, I mean, sometimes we played a lot of baseball last week and I think it just kind of got to the point where it was like, there was so much baseball play that a lot of people were just like really tired. People are trying to like finish up with school. There's, you know, the, um, testing and everything that's like finishing up.

And then that made me think of like, I wonder what these test scores are going to look like because of COVID. I'm like, Oh, honestly, Isaac just, he had his last week, um, and I was just like, what the, I don't know what his scores are going to be like. I don't. Well, Jackson's math scores came back and we're exceeding. And so I was like, wow, it kind of makes me feel like I did something right and it was worth losing some of the hairs that I lost over the past year.

But I just wonder how, I know so many moms that were so worried about the, um, like reading portion of like grade level stuff because they were just like, we weren't diligent. And I know that you've talked about, you know, it just kind of gets to a point with so many people doing the digital and just trying to like get through it and your focus is on other things, maybe teaching them other things other than the tedious work that they might be doing. Um, I know a lot of parents were just worried, so I just wonder how many other people who are listening were worried about their kids into the year testing.

I mean, I was, but I also was just like, you know what, what are we supposed to do about it? Like, you know what I mean? The test is done. So, um, you know, it is what it is. You know, I mean, I let Jackson have a good breakfast and you know, popped him up in the car. That's all you can do.

Yep. And I was like, listen, you go in there and you do your best and you know what, you don't, you do the damn thing. And if you don't know it, don't spend a whole lot of time on it. And he's like, mom, I think that if you don't know it and they put a question on there to trick you that you don't know that you should be able to skip. And I'm like, bro, like this is not the SAT. Like I'm not going through this with you.

Like if you don't know it, just like circle C and keep going, like keep it moving. But he did, he did good and I'm excited that schools about to be over in, I think on Friday we'll only have two weeks of school left. I think that we have six weeks of school. Y'all go later. It's always so weird like with school when I talk to you, because y'all start so much later and then go so much later in the year. We started, I think like the first week of August, like July 31st, maybe or August 1st

is when we started school. And then y'all didn't start until what, like September or something? I think this past year we started the first week of September, but normally we do start the end of August. Yeah. So see there's, that's why you guys go so much longer. So it always seems like at the end of the year that your life is just drug out sis. Yeah.

Yes. It does feel like that. Like come on. I wouldn't know. Nobody's paying attention anymore. They're over it. They're over it. I guess the next time, well, the next time I talk to you, will we be in New York?

Yes ma'am. Okay. Well then, I mean, I'll see you there. I'll obviously talk to you before then so that we can actually have a plan. It's not like we're just going to like run into each other, you know, like on 21st Street or something. But do you remember that one time that someone casually like stalked your Instagram to like find me there?

Do you remember that? Yes. And I was in little Italy and I was like, wait, kill's not with me. I'm eating Italian with other people like on a girl's shirt. She's not with me. What? Um, yeah, but that, that was a weird experience actually some, we should talk about that next time.

Heavy, heavy IG stalking. Honestly. Um, yeah. So anyway, well, if you guys have not followed us on at coffee combos podcast on Instagram, make sure you follow us over there. And if you have not subscribed to our show, make sure you do that by searching the purple podcast app on your iPhone or any Apple device, type in coffee combos, click subscribe, click the star, leave us a written review.

You can also find us on Spotify or any other podcast app. We hope you guys have a great week and we will talk to you from New York next. See ya.