Coffee Convos with Kail Lowry and Lindsie Chrisley - 187: Kail's Car Accident, A Rude Awakening, and Parenting Styles

Episode Date: October 28, 2021

This week on Coffee Convos Kail and Lindsie have A LOT to catch up on. First Kail talks about the car accident she was in the morning before recording the episode. She explains what happened and the aftermath. Thankfully no one was hurt. Then Lindsie talks about the rude wakeup call she had the other day involving a weed-wacker. And recently Kail and Lindsie have been thinking a lot about how the parenting choices and style of their parents have impacted their own styles today. What is the good that can be taken from it, and what have they chosen to leave behind?  This episode was sponsored by: Athena Club, MamaZen, Peloton, & Everly Well Music by Nathaniel Wyvern. Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License.

Hello and welcome to another episode of coffee combos podcast. We are so sorry that this episode is late. However, we hope you guys enjoy and are so thankful that y'all are here with us every week. Lindsay, I've had such a shit day today. I am finally at the office. It's 6 p.m. and I'm so sorry for my chaos spilling into your life. Welcome to coffee combos podcast. So I got into a car accident this morning. Didn't expect it. Also was in a panic because after the accident occurred, I couldn't find my phone to call for help. I'm driving down this long road and I was on my way to take the kids to school and there was two cars in front of me. One was a van and then one was either a

van or some type of SUV and we were all slowing down because the very first car was turning right into her driveway and so I slowed down and just you know chilling almost at a complete stop like almost and I did not see any car behind me at any point. That is how fast this car was flying behind me and slammed into me. When I tell you that I am so fucking thankful that I had my seatbelt on and my kids were strapped up properly because my face would be fucked up or I would be through the windshield if I one didn't drive a suburban and two if I didn't have my seatbelt on. What exactly was this car doing? Like where were they going? What was he said that he was dropping his child off at school and then just like coming back down the road. That is so scary.

Did you see it coming? No I never saw it coming. I never I never saw it coming. I never saw it coming. I don't know what's worse if you are in an accident and you see it about to happen or if I think they say you get hurt worse. More if you tense up. Yeah because if you see it coming you tense up and then you get hurt worse but the fact that I didn't see it coming I had my seatbelt on and the way that my head and my neck flew forward like I felt it right after I drove away from the like I felt it like in my neck in the back of my head like I hit my the back of my head on my like on the car like head part so hard and immediately like had a headache so I had to go get checked out today. I'm okay the kids are okay I did have to go get a rental vehicle

and I had to buy new car seats which the car seats were for both of them was like over $600. Well first of all car seats are so expensive but but when I had been in an accident with Jackson and even I was told this one time I was in an accident when he wasn't in the car that if there's a car seat present in the car at the time of an accident that you should just get rid of it and get a new seat um and I don't know how much validity there is to that but anytime I've ever been in an accident whether he's been in the seat or not in the seat I still always get or always did get a new seat when he was in a seat. I have always been told if you're in any type of accident you have to replace the car seats and I think there's a lot of people who don't know that

because so again I'm probably gonna get in big trouble for saying this but I had I called Harvey because I didn't really know what to do and I didn't have like I didn't know I just panicked like I don't I didn't I don't know um Jose was at the rescue again no he didn't he didn't come because he was in Baltimore but he called his dad who came to help me um but when I told Harvey about the car seat thing he said he didn't know that he was like why why do you have to replace the car seats I said truly I don't know if it's like a defect thing um but I would imagine right like when you get into an accident even if you don't see damage there could still be damage to the car you know what I mean so I would imagine it's the same thing for the car seat is like just because

you don't see damage nothing's cracked nothing's broken there it could still be like defective at that point. Correct so wait you get in this crash you start looking for your phone like where is I couldn't find it I because trying to get two toddlers in a car seat when they both have bags for school and then also I had like other things with me to bring with me um I had like a progress report and like a little bag because I had just whatever my extra stuff so I'm looking for my phone I can't find it finally call it and he's like I don't know what you're calling me for you have to call the police so I was like okay I call the police and um they took 30 minutes to get there well I was like oh is that like real like I don't know because I've never been like I think the last

like accident accident where like there needed to be like a tow truck and things like that was like maybe 2010 well I also think you live like in the middle of nowhere so this is true this is true you know it might take an officer 30 minutes to get there but then also did you tell them that everyone was like visibly okay I did yeah okay so then maybe that's but there was like no shoulder either so it's kind of like holding up traffic a little bit but shout out to Tracy from Delaware Gators football team because she drove by and then she her and her daughter like stayed with me for the rep until like the police gave us the police report at the end um so thank you Tracy um I appreciate you um it was it was a long thing it literally took like from the time the accident

happened which was before 8 30 until I left the scene was probably by like 10 it was like two hours yeah but then you're texting me telling me I've been in a car accident and I might be a little late to like record it because I was so like upset that you like would have to rearrange your schedule and like I know what that feels like like I when you're just like okay this is not realistic and like I know it's out of anyone's hands but also like I know like it's okay but it's like not okay because I have other shit to do you know yes and I I just don't think that um you getting in a car accident like now if you had been speeding and you got in a wreck oh and you would hit somebody I would be like Kale I'm very not happy about this like why were you speeding like where were you going what

was happening but this truly was like out of your control an accident yeah honestly though I have to say like the guy that was driving behind me that did it he was very apologetic he what like took a responsibility for the whole thing like he was it was at first I was like crying and upset because they then the kids were upset and then and then I was mad and then like as I sat there longer I was like it is what it is like getting mad at this person is not going to do any good for me it's not going to do any good for him and he like came up and he's like I'm so sorry like you know this was completely my fault like I apologize whatever so in that regard I will say that I feel like he handled it really well um and yeah so I just got my rental like I said at like maybe like five or

whenever I four like when I texted you and then I was trying to take the old car seats out and then the insurance their insurance asked me for like pictures and stuff and then um then I could install my new car seats and then I'm pretty sure I'm going to have the rental for like about a month oh that's the worst remember that time that I told you about sideswiping the teenager near Costco I don't remember the Costco part but yeah yeah well you know I was just obviously um didn't see the car and it was in my blind spot and I went to get over and you know he let me know that he was there right away because I heard it go and oh shit and he was so calm about it he was like I'm just coming from hockey practice and I was going to meet my parents for food so

they're right around the corner it's not a big deal like thank goodness the crowd now that one was my fault but like the person that hit you like he was also chill so I don't know what it would be like I'm sure people have horror stories of car accidents and altercations with people on the side of the road yeah I've almost been no I've not almost been I've been in two accidents near Costco why Costco is not a good a good place for you it's a great place for me not for my bank account but like it's a great place for me to visit um and they also have really good hot dogs I think you can get a Costco hot dog first of all shut up what are you to everyone talks about Costco hot dogs yeah they're so good and it's so cheap and you can also get

although I do think I can't remember if it's Costco or Sam's um because I frequent both but one of them has Pepsi products and that makes me upset um but the hot dog's good um but yeah I've been in two accidents near Costco and the people that hit me near the other Costco that I went to it was actually a weird situation and I thought that the insurance company wasn't going to cover it because the person that was hit that hit me worked for like a car max and the the person that was driving was the spouse of the person that was insured to be driving the car oh shit because it was a company car and so I thought they weren't going to cover it and I was all the pieces it was like a brand new car I had just gotten it like a couple weeks ago

and it was smash city and well that's what I'm saying this car that I got I mean it's brand new I got it in January and I've already gotten a flat tire on the turnpike what was that like a month ago and then I had to get all new tires and then now this I'm like I don't know how much better it's gonna get this year for me with cars um let me just say though like I don't like driving other people's cars like I don't want to drive someone else's vehicle ever let alone a rental like obviously I love driving rentals I love it you do I don't I'm just I love my car so like my when I have a car that is not like I told you I'm so like when I wake up every day I'm thankful for my vehicle like I know that sounds fucking crazy but like I'm thankful for my goddamn

vehicle and I was switching things over from my car my truck to this new truck and I'm like I just don't feel comfortable driving this rental even though it's the same year make and model okay well I would be so comfortable in doing that because putting miles on someone else's vehicle yeah it's not mine first of all I'd be making plans for trips and then also it's like who cares if like french fries or nuggies get spilled right because you don't it's not yours it's just a rental you know that's what they're there for totally love it love it love that for you all right everyone I want to take a break really quickly to talk to you about something that I'm obsessed with right now and it's smooth legs by Athena club's razor so this razor is

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your first order just go to athenaclub.com and use promo code coffee combos that is A-T-H-E-N-A-C-L-U-B .com with promo code coffee combos for 20% off what about the other shenanigans that's been going on in your life more specifically your Instagram story okay I have a lot to unpack here and so I know that our listeners don't love you know extra long conversations about this so I'm going to make it as short and tidy as possible but I did write down like specific bullet points that I wanted to cover um there's about four pages but I'm gonna I'm gonna summarize um a novel stories a novel love it so if you follow Kale and the chaos on any type of social media and and podcasts and

things like that um and by chaos I mean the baby daddies um I address some things on my Instagram story that were a response to something that chris publicly stated so I was responding to him claiming that you know in a nutshell he you know we have a very toxic relationship and um I can email him and cash up him requests for the kids so I responded saying with the screenshots from three different medical bills one was $50 that was for a copay for chest x-rays and a doctor a sick visit and then one was a $175 balance for lux at the pediatrician and one was a $175 balance for creed at the pediatrician I posted these stories in response to him publicly stating you know that I could cash up him requests when I heard about this I just needed to respond

because I felt that it was so objective and clear that nobody else would I guess I didn't think that people would question it because it's one of those things where it's like so clear cut do you get what I mean yes I do okay he was in Miami at the time that I did this and I again this just further proves my point I don't care that he was in Miami I didn't do this because he was in Miami it was because I was responding to what he publicly said I don't care about the timing I don't care about his trip I don't care about that for the last month or so I have been requesting money from Chris for medical because he has not paid or tried to pay towards his child support order that is already in place and I believe it's been in place about three years maybe a little bit

longer he is ordered a set amount for one child and he is not ordered for a creed so Chris and his mom did try to convince me to let me or to let you know him put them on his insurance however Chris is on state insurance and he put lux I believe on his state insurance without my knowledge but I have access to to healthcare like I have access and I have my own private policy so I don't know but I'm pretty sure that the state doesn't give insurance for people who have access to that which lux does so I declined I I think that that state insurance should be given to somebody who actually needs it and if there if that is allowed then Chris's insurance should be added as a secondary option I'm okay with that and I I did tell Chris that but I don't know if he's

taken the necessary steps to do that so after I posted the screenshots and receipts to to my stories I was really mind-fucked at the the excuses that people were making for him and it wasn't about $50 it was more for you know medical is a necessity I'm not asking him to pay for recreational things or things that the kids want can I can I interject here for a second yes yes I think where people choose to turn a blind eye is there's an expectation set when people think that you make a lot of money that the responsibility financially solely belongs to you and and that's good and great and I'm I'm saying you but really anybody that's in this situation and just because there is an income variation between parties does not mean that another

party shouldn't pay based off of their income the payment would be that they needed to pay because it's 50% of their responsibility and so I think that income doesn't really play a factor in this when you're specifically talking about necessities for minor children that should be 50 50 split you are mom he is dad oh a hundred percent a hundred percent and that was so many people were saying that he doesn't make what I make and I can't believe that excuse that that excuse isn't valid to me because Joe doesn't make what I make hobby doesn't make what I make and let's not forget about the fact that chris has a bachelor's degree hobby and Joe do not have degrees and chris chooses to not work at all he doesn't carry a job but the other two do not only do they have

50 50 custody but I mean hobby and I split finances down to 50 50 for lunch money right and hobby doesn't make what I make but he doesn't question it doesn't second guess it doesn't even it just is what it is I mean I don't understand how you can make an excuse for someone who literally chooses not to work he chooses I mean last I knew he was living at home he's 27 years old living at home with his mom collecting ebt which is food stamps and state insurance by choice because he is not he's choosing not to work so to me in my opinion that should be one that's not fair and two you don't get to take that away from somebody who actually needs it needs it and is working and is trying to make ends meet but we've talked about even to refer back to maid that we covered on

you know two different episodes that the system and the way that it's set up I think is just wacky and it kind of is unfortunate that there are loopholes that people can use the system unfairly and then people who actually do need it can't get it and it's so it's so sad and I don't say that to talk about anybody specifically I'm saying that generally that that's just a really sad reality the way that the system works but I don't disagree with you that if if your children do have access to private insurance that that's totally fine if you know they do qualify for the state benefits if that's something that wants to you know be added as a secondary that's one thing but it also would kind of be negligent on your part if you do have access to private insurance

and don't have them on your policy and then you use the state insurance to not have them privately insured then that's wrong too I agree and again this is all in response to what he publicly stated first I would not have addressed this or put this on social media or address it again on this podcast if he didn't bring it up first and I just want to reiterate the fact that like if it is legal for him to have his state insurance as secondary I'm perfectly fine with that but he needs to take them if you know he is you know wanting to to to have them on there he needs to take the necessary steps to add the his insurance as a secondary insurance that is number one again don't give a shit that he was in Miami I just think that his kids need to be taken care of before he leaves for

a trip so whether that's adding the secondary insurance or not I don't really care that needs to be done or his expenses the fact that he had every opportunity to sign up for a teen mom prior to this and get paid and he could literally catch up on all of his child support or do whatever he needed to do is mind-blowing to me but now he wants to do it and still not catching up on child support not paying towards medical he basically was saying like if he put them on his insurance he wouldn't have to pay those copays because his insurance would cover them which may be the case then add them secondary but you know he'll drop off he to the last two times he's dropped off groceries and again last that I was aware he was able to get food stamps

for them and that's all good and great but again fifty dollars a hundred dollars in groceries is not enough when you are an able body and you are able to go get a job and you have a degree and you have a vehicle to get to work like these things are I and I'm not going to address it again after this because it's one of those things where it's like if you see it any other way than I see it um then you're committed to seeing it another way and a hundred percent a hundred percent that's the thing that I think that um I mean you and I've talked about this before just in passing conversations but people are committed to seeing what they want to see and no matter what you say they're going to see what they want to see right it could be one thing and they're seeing

something totally different I did I did talk to my therapist about it I was like listen I responded to this stuff on my stories and she was like Kale at the end of the day even when you defend yourself you're not people who are committed to seeing you as a villain are committed to seeing you as a villain she was like so you're you responding or not responding doesn't really get you any further but at this point I've already I already posted the stuff on my story so I told her I was like why I'm gonna address it one last time I was like I'm gonna be done with it but like moving forward I'm not I'm not gonna address it because we've talked about it a hundred times and um I definitely will say though um the things that I respond to are fewer and far between

now you know what I mean like I think the last thing that I responded to was like the fat shaming stuff and um I know it's like oh you know Kale's the drama or whatever but like it is less and less things that I'm responding to um and so this this let this be the last time I address something you know like this because it isn't anybody's business but when you call me out and say oh you can just cash out me requests and it's like you won't even pay a $50 request because you're claiming that your insurance will cover it but then you didn't call and put them on your on the insurance a secondary or whatever I don't know what the state thinks about all of it I don't know if he claims them I don't know because he claimed he claimed lux on taxes um and I did file a claim against him

for that because he doesn't have lux all the time um so he received who knows how much money for that um and it's just like it's just not I do want to just address what you said this is you know you saying this is the last time that you're going to address something I don't think you owe that to anyone to say that it's going to be the last time that you address something because your life is how you live your life and what you do and what you choose to address is what you feel is appropriate and so sure there's going to be other situations that are going to come up that come along with the different baby daddies that you're probably going to address in the future I don't think it's an issue with addressing something I think it's how something is addressed and is it

appropriately possibly helping someone else and you know that probably when you're sharing this someone else has been through this as well actually you've got so many dm's about it yep um nobody really saying anything negative to me other than like you know this isn't for instagram or whatever I got like one or two of those but a lot of them were like I'm in the same boat I did get a bunch of messages like oh just put them on child support just put them on child support just put them on child support so the thing about that is he is on child support but the state of Delaware doesn't really care about child support um and the only thing that they would do is maybe take your license yeah and then you run the risk like it's a toxic cycle right because

then are you going to turn him in and have his license taken but then you're giving the kids to him and then potentially he gets pulled over and then gets arrested with the kids in the car like there's a bunch of different things that could happen it's like a trickle effect right um that just doesn't really make sense but I do think that that's wild how different states handle child support situations um oh 100 Joe whenever Joe was on child support years ago um I want to say don't quote me on this but I want to say it was like season one maybe season two he he went to jail and I didn't put him in there the state did yeah it was like he some states will pick you up yeah and he didn't I think he he got out when he paid it it was like not he was very very very short

lived um but and thankfully I took him off and all of that so we don't have to go through that but so Pennsylvania doesn't play about child support Delaware doesn't give a shit the Pennsylvania is not playing because we talk about all things mom on here I really want to talk to you about how hard motherhood really is we all know it's really freaking hard and as moms our emotional and mental well-being has been neglected for a long time I know I've been a mom for almost 12 years now and you do not want to let that get the best of you so mom is then is a revolutionary solution for motherhood burnout anxiety irritability impatience and so much more and we know for a fact that happy moms raise happy kids right so as a mom I have so much going on especially being

the team mom for one of my kids football teams I have kids of all ages even the toddler sedages like four and one um where they're just like not quite on the same page but you know the toddler years are um are very trying years sometimes so you guys get it with impatience and things like that also mom guilt impatience anxiety anger yelling dealing with a lot of um kids at once I have four kids you guys know how it goes it's so important to take control of your mental health and just be a happier mom so that you can do the best for your kids I personally started using the mama zen app probably six weeks ago and it just helps me learn how to be more patient learn how to kind of manage my emotions a little bit better and it just helps me actually avoid nasty feelings of

anger or rage mainly impatience for me and mom guilt those are the two things that I really struggle with mama zen will teach you how to deal with your kids difficult behavior if you you know are struggling with that and we handle it with more love and patience so after you download the mama zen app you'll create they will create a personalized program for you that fits your own motherhood journey so yours will be very different than mine probably but it is super easy to use and you just pop in your headphones close your eyes and listen mind power sessions are short so just two to 18 minutes long um and they have super short emergency sessions for whenever your head is spinning out of control and you need to calm down immediately and I had one of those moments

this morning when I got into a car accident so when I had a minute of downtime just log on to the mama zen app I really want you guys to try mama zen and see for yourself how much better you can feel as a mom you can download it on the app store or google play and download mama zen today that's m a m a z e n and right now you can use promo code convo's that code will unlock your free trial so you can try mama zen for yourself mama your mental and emotional well-being is the most important thing for you your kids and your family don't postpone it any longer I will say just full transparency that there is no child support exchanges in my situation and thank goodness we're in a place that we don't you know require that and it's amicable enough that

we're just I say we're two responsible adults that can get along well enough and I'm also saying this after the fact of saying a will was a cop caller last week but we can get along well enough to know like when Jackson's with me I take care of everything when he's with his dad he takes care of everything we literally never talk about finances and I don't even care um it's just not a battle that I'm going to pick but also in my situation there's a lot of things that I don't deal with that you've had in multiple of your situations so um sometimes you know you just have to pick and choose your battles and obviously this is one that is is a big deal and I see it as a big deal and I think that a lot of people see it as a big deal but um I don't know that's

I don't know that's interesting that's an interesting take that the state wouldn't have the copay so that's the the argument I'm very interested to find out like the legalities of that well I haven't been able to get like clear answers so I would be and I've talked to like I've filed not filed I talked to somebody from the welfare office to kind of see but he wasn't really super helpful because again if it is allowed and legal I am not opposed to having them as secondary so that he doesn't have to come out of pocket but I'm not going to put my kids on state insurance when they have access to my private healthcare I'm not like there's no I would prefer to leave that for someone who actually needs it I was on it at one time I needed it um I also wasn't

booking trips to Miami when I needed it um but that's just my personal opinion and I think also that the timing of the situation just in general looks bad because things have been going on behind the scenes that you haven't said anything about and then it's like okay it's just simultaneous with the Miami thing with what he posted and then now your response you know so had maybe you said something about it earlier on maybe people's perspectives would have been a little bit different true but anyway we don't have to spend the entire episode on it I just wanted to address it um because you know I have no there's I could tell the whole I could tell the whole story I don't have to leave anything out um I want to tell a story yeah okay tell me I want to hear

so um I chatted with will and um he was like you need to do a make good and tell people that I didn't call the cops and I was like okay I'll tell everybody on coffee compost podcast that you didn't call the cops and I was just laughing about it because honestly I got so many messages about this and multiple people told me that like in the state of Georgia cops do get involved in civil disputes um and custody agreements but then I called the cops myself and they told me that they didn't so I don't know if it's like by county if it's different um I really have no idea but I still think it's funny and then the Braves are now playing in the world series so I thought I was gonna say that I thought oh wow I'm gonna one up you I shit you not I looked at the schedule and

of course they're playing in Atlanta when Will has Jackson and I'm like you know what of course it's just not it's not my year it's not my year to go but you know what next year will be next year will be you and Jackson at baseball games all season long and it'll be it'll be perfectly fine and you know what and good spirits I will still invite Will um because at this point everything's just funny and hunky dory and we're we're all good we're just like living the best life um Jackson has his first basketball practice tonight and oh that's exciting after we record I'm gonna go and try to catch some of it but he is super excited about it and I'm kind of excited to see him play something else other than baseball um he seems like so much more excited about this and I don't know if it's

because it's more fast paced or I remember you telling me that one of your boys like couldn't get into baseball because it was slow yeah it was Isaac Isaac could he didn't want anything to do with it he was like no um moving it's so wait can I just can I just say one thing really quickly before we move on yeah it's really crazy how different like the states are too with sports because I also signed my kids up for basketball um Isaac and Lincoln both start but ours doesn't start until January oh it doesn't no I got it said like the first practice was like mid-January oh wow yeah so and I I don't know if it's just like the league or like the state I don't know like I was just and um Lincoln is very very very excited to try basketball again he played one

season before so um I'm so excited to see videos of him I just like didn't realize how different the sports like timing was but yeah we don't have to yeah moving on it is weird and I think like it's also weird that your kids don't start school until like a month later we get out a month earlier um there's just a lot of of geographical differences I feel like um by the way can I tell you that the other day I woke up and Jackson was not home by the way um I woke up because I heard did I tell the story about how I woke up to the guy with a weed eater at my window no no first of all it's a weed wacker in a weed eater no it's a weed wacker okay well whatever kale weed wacker um he had the wacker like at my window so close and it was like probably 745

ish it was extremely early to have a wacker out um and I I guess I forgot I must have just like fallen asleep and not realized that I did because my curtains were open which I always close them so he was looking at me and his gardener hat like while I was laying in the bed with his wacker like going and I'm like okay this is awkward so I'm in like these little like small night shorts and a t-shirt so I'm like okay obviously I have to wait until he leaves until like I get up he can't see me like this so I go to walk in my kitchen and when I do I realize my door is all the way open coming in from my garage and my garage door had been opened all night long so with all of this being said I have ordered um an alarm system so that I can remember because like I feel like if

I set it then I'll remember to do it because it'll be something that's like on my task list yeah but I don't know what happened like with someone rummaging around my house all night and eating snacks and stuff and like I don't know what was going on and I was just in my bed and I woke up and the weed wacker's going with the man in the window and my garage is all the way open there's a blower going outside um no idea what happened um first of all 7 45 a.m with a weed wacker is not a good way to wake up like immediately no immediately no um also today I had a ton of stuff to do and do you ever feel like okay and you're gonna feel like this whenever you move I can guarantee you and I also have a question about that okay um I have appointments like mostly

all day every day and it might be like across town and I need to get to it but then I also have appointments that like need to be done at the house like stuff going on and so I mismanaged my schedule this morning and needed to let the people in so I was like almost gonna be late to my other appointment so I could let the people in but I just left them let them in and prayed that they didn't steal anything and left oh that happened to me just the other day at the office I literally like this office is it it used to be a house and um so there's a bathroom like a full bathroom and a full kitchen and then essentially like bedrooms but I use the bedrooms as like other office rooms the guy was coming here to like check out the water heater and then the AC and I told

like first of all he was late and I had somewhere to be I said I hope that you're okay but I have to go and I just hoped and prayed that he didn't take anything yeah that's what I did I was living on a prayer like driving through town same coming back and I was like oh wow looks like they did everything that they said that they were gonna do but like I hope nothing stolen right that's all you can do because I mean I'm for some reason to the last two weeks I've been taking 8am appointments because when up like when my water heater um wasn't working I had to get an 8am appointment that's all he had available same thing for like the gym sometimes and I have to get all the way across town like I'm taking appointments earlier than I normally would um and just like trying to get

just like trying to get everywhere I also just like hopefully no one hopefully you're you're safe you're good yeah I hope so also I was praying that I wasn't gonna walk through my house and then of course I'm doing like the little like creeping walk walking through my house making sure no one's in here like is someone sleeping in Jackson's bed like could someone be partying on the couch upstairs what could be happening but nobody was here so that was good all right you guys we're gonna take a quick break to talk about one of our partners Peloton and I am so excited to chat with you guys about this because one I've shared it before and two if you are like me and you have tried to fit exercise into your routine and find it hard to stick with

or find time for um I just know committing to making time to work out can just be so tough but with Peloton you can start building fitness into your routine with thousands of cardio and strength classes that take as little as 15 minutes the original Peloton bike now costs $400 less so now is the perfect time to start building the momentum to reach your fitness goals and for me sometimes things can just get overwhelming and taking care of yourself is the first thing to go but even if you can just spare 15 minutes you can seamlessly fit cardio and strength classes into your routine with Peloton there's truly never been a better moment to commit to your fitness goals because the original Peloton bike is now like I said $400 less which is a huge savings

and sometimes just fitting that fitness class in your day and taking time to drive to and from the gym just isn't happening so I love that Peloton has inspiring instructors they have curated music and it's cardio and strength so Peloton isn't just game changing cardio you can add strength class to your ride or you can combine cardio and strength into one workout which I love doing with the bike boot camp and get a total body fitness experience and also one subscription for the whole family so the all-access membership is like a family plan for no additional cost which I think is huge and you can just bring home the Peloton experience for your whole family with access to their entire class library encouragement from expert instructors and then the convenience of

also working out at home there's been so many times that I felt like oh I need to get to the gym but I really don't have time to go to the gym and there's just cuts out all of that and then there's classes for every level so if you are you know a beginner or if you are an expert they have something for you and you can experience motivation like never before with the Peloton bike now $400 less I keep saying that but truly $400 less go to onepeloton.com to learn more that's O-N-E-P-E-L-O-T-O-N.com I did need to ask you though about the siting issue on your house because I saw your stories and on a very lower scale this reminded me of when I got my glider for Jackson's nursery

and Will kept telling me it was blue but it was gray and when we got it he was like yeah that's definitely gray but what he saw on the swatch was blue and your siting looks like what you put up and then like what you were what you got and what you were supposed to get to me look like totally different colors. 1000 percent different colors to and everyone I even had messages that was like wow that blue is so nice and I literally responded was like it's supposed to be gray. But how did this happen and are you keeping it that way like what's the details? To be perfectly honest with you I don't know how to address it because I don't I don't I don't know if anyone is at fault I don't know if the wrong color got ordered I mean it was very clear what

color I wanted and I even said examples and then we that is not it looks blue to me. Okay so this is the question when you picked the color of your house did you pick it off of examples of pictures that you sent from Pinterest or did you actually pick from a swatch that has like a number that says this is the color? So both I picked out from pictures that I saw on Pinterest and then I went and looked at what color siting it was by what company. So do you have written communications of where you communicated this color? I think so. I think you need to pull the written communications and then also get a swatch from that company and put it up against the siting on your house. Okay I'm writing this down so any emails any emails and texts and then what? And then get

a swatch from the company of this of a sample of the siting and put it up to your house to see if it matches and then you'll know if they did wrong. I remember I don't know if anyone follows me on Instagram and on my stories and stuff I had actually taken all the samples to the house and I lined them up outside the house. I need I left them at the house but I need to go back and see if they're at the house because I want to see if that sample that I picked from that matches the siting. Yes you need to put it up to it and see if it matches and then address it from that. Okay so then I did get some messages saying that it's typical for swatches to look different than when you put them up on the house. Not that big of a variation it shouldn't look it shouldn't

be navy blue when it's supposed to be gray. Gray let me actually look up um I completely forgot about that part I didn't even I would didn't even catch you guys up on that. I was like oh my gosh Lincoln picked the color of the house. He must have that must have been that's what happened it was Lincoln um oh my gosh oh p.s. you're not gonna love this but we're gonna love this um oh god I'm scared uh Jackson and I are going to Disney for the week of Christmas. Oh my god you guys are gonna love that. I love Disney at Christmas so much I know you you're just like not a fan but there's just something so magical about Christmas at Disney it's just so much fun I think he's gonna love it so much um we're staying at the animal kingdom and I am so excited about it like where the

animals come up to near the balcony um and I know a lot of people have asked me before about a Disney itinerary and I think that's so funny because my itinerary like way long ago didn't really work out in the way that I thought it was gonna work out which is partially why I didn't share it um but this time I hired a vacation planner and it's probably the best thing I ever did. Well I wonder if she will like help you pick like rides and fast passes and stuff to like go in order so that it would like make sense for you guys. Yeah to go in order. I tried to make it make sense but it didn't make sense you know what I mean. Yeah totally I get it and then I want to ask everyone who has been to Disney and has done character breakfast lunch or dinners um what are

the best ones we have done chef Mickey's um and that's the only character one that we've ever done but I would just love to have some recommendations um also I feel like I need to get on Etsy and Pinterest and come up with like outfit ideas and all of the things and I also have another big surprise coming in January and I can't tell anyone but you're gonna freak out. Do I know? Yeah I do. Yeah. Fuck yeah I love knowing secrets before everyone else. I'm so excited about it like I I almost am about to tell people but like I'm not. Okay wait but I only I know two things and I unless it's something else so I'm gonna text you when we get off and I'm gonna see if it's one of these two things. Yeah but it's going to be like um it's gonna be very very exciting and I feel

like people are gonna be just as excited as Jackson and I are um but anyway okay so also so let me tell you this I'm all over the place honey um Will and I went to a play therapist today um that's what Jackson does for therapy is play therapy have your children ever done that? No but I was gonna ask you about that. Okay so um he does see a play therapist and it's so cool they um play in a playroom and it it makes it easier for them to be able to communicate and I love that idea so much but Will and I had this parent um meeting for like two hours and it's interesting that listeners wanted to hear about parenting differently than you were parented and breaking generational trauma because it's something that came up in our meeting but then another thing

that also came up in our meeting was that people that get divorced um or they separate relationship just didn't work out and then we've coined this term you know I'm now co-parenting the therapist said you have always co-parented even when you were with someone because you are co-parenting um and so that co-parenting relationship changes when your relationship changes and that's why you have to figure out how to be able to work differently um and then it got into the conversation of do you parent differently than you were parented and interestingly Will parents very similar to how he was parented and I parent nothing like how I was parented and not that I was I feel that I was parented wrong because I think that um I do believe that

my dad did a lot of things the right way in the best way that he knew how and then I also kind of want to get into that conversation about as parents when we are parenting we always think that we're doing the right thing at that time but then we sometimes look back on things and we're like wow I probably should have navigated that a little bit differently do you ever do that oh all the time but think about it you would you can't see it that way when you're that far grown from it does that make sense like I can't I can't be like oh I should have done that differently when I did the best thing I could in that moment I did the best thing that I could in that year I was going through x y and z the kids were going through x y and z I did the best I could for that

time um it's hindsight is always 2020 I know the listeners love when I say that um I think I went through a period of always saying that but it's the same for parenting right like it's the same for parenting like you can't you can't look back and be like you know I should have done that differently well no at the time you you did the best you could and I think that that's something that I have had to accept um and just healing in my own personal life that right I always for the longest period of time want to have someone to place blame on okay I do this or I'm triggered by this because you did that and it's like you have to really step back and say okay in my situation Lindsay it wasn't your decision to parent yourself that was your parents decision how to parent you

and I wasn't responsible for that parenting right like I would I might have been harmed from it in some ways but like also helped from it in some ways but I can't just like carry that around for the rest of forever and some of the things that I feel like were negative in my childhood I have found more recently since I've gone through you know the separation and then divorce and now trying to navigate co-parenting with will and do it the best way possible some of the things that I experienced that I truly felt were so negative in my childhood have been so helpful to me and the co-parenting situation with will and things that I saw that did not work that like I never would do that makes so much sense to me that makes so much sense to me and I'm sure you probably have

done that yep from things that your mom did that you're like I would never I would never do that with my kids I mean I think I've talked about it before at some point it's like I'm you know my mom but but I also like it's hard because as a mom in the situation I am in with Chris for example you know my mom cut my dad off for the inconsistency you know what I mean for the excuses for because she knew at the time that the inconsistency was worse than cutting him off and at the time I was angry but now as a parent I understand it right but there are certain things at the time whenever you were growing up that I'm sure you viewed things very differently until you've been in a situation to where you can relate to that yes 100% and so I actually was talking to my therapist

today about how sometimes what I'm a 32 year old woman like I can't worry about something that happened on I'm just gonna make this up like on my sixth birthday that my brain like wasn't even fully formed like I can't even remember half of the things that were going on at that time I can't allow that to control my life at 32 years old like I've got bigger fish to fry um and sometimes I think that we hold on to to trauma because we I don't know like what the how the best way to say is like sometimes I feel like I've held on to things because it makes me feel safe because I'm comfortable there growth is uncomfortable yeah growth is so uncomfortable that's I literally this is the theme of my life right now I cannot stress to you enough like the growth is uncomfortable

like knowing that you have to look at how you do things and think about changing them or acknowledge the fact that how you've been dealing with things isn't correct or isn't right or isn't healthy is hard it's not a good time it's not fun to be like wow like I this is how I've been handling something for 10 15 years and it's actually wrong it's actually unhealthy it's actually you know what I mean like facing the music is not easy and making the necessary changes to like do better is not a good time at all no it's I feel like that is where you grow though um when you get really uncomfortable and and come and put yourself and allow yourself to be in uncomfortable situations that allows you to experience growth if you allow it right right yeah I'm 100% on on

the same page as you girlfriend are you guys we're going to take a quick break to talk about one of our partners Everly well and I have a quick question for you guys take a moment and answer this question how are you feeling today and if the answer is anything less than great it's time to learn more and demand better for your body take control of your health and well-being with an at-home lab test from Everly well Everly well offers affordable at-home lab tests that give you trusted physician reviewed results you can choose from test including food sensitivity metabolism sleep and stress thyroid and so much more for me I have done the food sensitivity test and I have also recently

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since we only have a little bit more time and there's two things that we like have to talk about did you see the um situation that happened with Alec Baldwin with Alec Baldwin isn't he related to um Justin Bieber's wife Haley Baldwin he was filming so he was filming um for this movie called Rust and he discharged a firearm and I I have so many feelings about this because um um he's he's just been all over these headlines for this and he was told that this firearm was cold or like unloaded and this happened on the set of an upcoming film and it resulted in the death of a cinematographer and now an investigation has been opened it was in New

Mexico um and no charges have been filed yet um but somebody died yes but the director also was injured um but has been released from the hospital and I am just like wait there's so many questions that I have about this that why was there an actual bullet in a like prop gun I'm so first of all it's really weird that you brought this up today because I actually got a call from the middle school here where um a middle schooler brought a loaded gun to school wait what today at one of the schools here are you kidding they called yeah like they sent out for the district they like sent out that's like crazy I have chills um what what the why would there be a bullet on there like how do you and that's like not an accident I to like leave a

bullet in there I mean how why was there how could that be an accident why was there only was there only one why wasn't there blanks like I don't understand is is there a way for I'm not familiar with firearms um so I don't know about like blanks or if there's like a possibility for or there to be an actual bullet um so I don't know but I do know that the director was terminated from a previous film for the same situation involving you're lying you're lying you're lying no and that was in um 2019 and a gun unexpectedly discharged in Arkansas on a set and then you need to tell me that the same no there's no coincidence here like something's up right that is so sketchy to me that is like what are the chances of the same thing that that um what

is the word I'm looking for like like one in a million what are the chances that the same that same thing happens to the same director I don't know and it said that he was taken off the scene like immediately um when that happened in 2019 so um yeah it's just it's crazy but that cinematographer died after being airlifted um I'm rest in peace I'm so sorry for anyone to affect like all of those affected by by that that is so sad and then according to the search warrant affidavit from the Santa Fe sheriff's office the director picked up a prop gun from a rolling cart prepared by the armorer and handed it to Baldwin moments before the fatal shooting um as he retrieved the weapon the director yelled cold gun a phrase that is meant to

indicate that the gun is not loaded and is safe to handle neither Baldwin or halls were aware that there was live rounds in the gun um and the director has not commented publicly on this Baldwin did speak out regarding the incident and said that he just I guess tweeted that there are no words to convey my shock and sadness regarding the tragic incident that took the life of a wife a mother and a deeply admired colleague of ours and just wanted to let people know that he was fully cooperating with the police and investigation to address how the tragedy occurred um I have chills like literal chills down my body because I cannot imagine I mean obviously it's just like a shocking incident but also for him to have accidentally

done that like you he has to live with that you know what I mean well I know and then um also it was said that someone from the production team had said that they are conducting an internal review on safety protocols um like as with any ongoing investigation and that they were limited in their ability to say anything further publicly or privately um and we're just asking for patience however um that's just to me someone from production saying that is just typical protocol for the entertainment industry to say you know hey there is an internal ongoing investigation going on in this um that's like a cover your ass move um right I just think doesn't really provide any type of um comfort to be honest but why would there have I just

want anyone who's listening to maybe help me understand what would there have ever been a need for like an actual bullet to be in a gun on set like can they not do the same same scenes with with blanks like was this or like a or like a prop like a fake gun you've seen these crazy scenes that people they have in movies and stuff they couldn't have like a a really really cool replica of a gun yeah I mean I don't know but that just seems like completely negligent to me um moving on we have not talked about this in some time but brian laundry yes um I saw an article on cnn it said that a notebook found near brian laundry's remains could answer some key questions experts are saying um obviously we all know that many questions still remain

unanswered uh following his death but crime experts are saying the notebook found near his remains in florida um the nature reserve park could shed some light on the circumstances of his disappearance what wait what time out a notebook found near brian laundry's remains brian laundry's dead kill are you under a rock wait he's answer me is he dead yes yes um brian laundry he was found he was when was this when did this occur like last week um the fbi basically confirmed that the remains that they had had found in the carlton reserve did belong to laundry and I believe that they confirmed those remains by dental records um there was no I believe and anyone correct me if I'm wrong that it was just like his bones like it there was no flesh or like anything

like that do they announce a cause of death it has been sent to some type of not like a pathologist but someone like a coroner no like past that it would they call it started with an a I forget what autopsy oh gal they they called it something else but it said that um um the everything in that area had been like wet and I don't know if his body had been under water for a period of time um how long he he actually had been dead but there's been so many things that also been said surrounding this that um I don't know if anyone's listening if you guys heard this that he had an uncle that lived kind of close to here and that supposedly he had been spotted um near his uncle's house um there was footage of him riding a bike like all sinister

like people thinking that was him um all these different conspiracies about this man and he could have very well been dead for like a long period of time for for his body to decompose in this way but then a lot of people who do live in that Florida area so they don't find it to be weird that the body decompose in this way because with it being like so swampy there and with the water that it could have sped up the decomposition um but experts did tell CNN that the notebook believed to be laundries could offer some insight to a story um obviously that has grabbed all of our attention if that notebook contained for example information that could have been admissions it could be projecting blame or rationalization um all the information could help in the determination

and that was of um just a former FBI profiler had said that and then a source with knowledge of the investigation told CNN the notebook was clearly wet when it was found outside a dry bag authorities located in their search but it is possibly salvageable and that they're going to use any potential means to dry that out before opening it and that they were being very careful with that and I did just want to say that I find it to be very interesting that the laundries and the attorney had kind of remained so silent and on making any types of statements publicly but then were so quick um the laundry's family attorney was so quick to go and do like a world tour press tour taking all of these interviews and by the time he was like going through all of that

I was thinking to myself okay I think the laundry's family the family attorney needs an attorney himself I'm okay the word that you were looking for before was anthropologist forensic anthropologist um thank you so much you're welcome um that's what I'm here for um I clearly live under a rock I don't know where I I have been this entire week I kind of have a theory on this is it too soon to have one no I mean I think that we shouldn't be reckless in theory because it we don't want to be like conspiracy theorist but also I think it's fair to say since this is played out so publicly and the world is so invested in this that it would be like not normal to not have your own theory I honestly think that the family and him like knew that he was going to like leave and die

I also think that and it was said that um I can't remember if it was his mom or his dad had told authorities that he had left the house like very upset um and I believe they knew at that point that once he didn't show back up that there was a risk there of him not being coming back alive when there is only a skeleton left or like bones left is there a way to determine how someone like what the cause of death is I think that's why they sent it to the anthropologist yes because I think that there are ways to tell but also with limitations right like how decomposed was this body um is there enough there to even determine that who knows um there is actual zero down my mind though that his parents knew exactly where he was going like when he left

I agree wholeheartedly agree with that and there's just a couple of this the same sorry to cut you off was this the same reserve where they reported that his car was yes and also um the timeline that the attorney gave and then there's the fact that they cut the daughter off and weren't communicating with her about Brian was very telling to me because if you truly are trying to help or was this just something that the parents were internally dealing with that like they felt confident that their son had like gone off to die like is that why they weren't communicating anything and just waiting for his body to surface like I can't imagine um me being able to act that way knowing that like my child could just be out there in harm's way agreed you know agree with you

yeah no I completely agree with you and then I just think it's so insane to me that the laundry's attorney could be doing basically a world press tour but then be getting angry because reporters and stuff are calling him out it's like sir do you realize that the entire world is invested in this um and this is actually what happens when you have been asked to cooperate with law enforcement and like you haven't and then you go and start speaking you're going to get backlash like that's just what's going to happen the nature of right right right right so I'm just blown away by this I'm I'm I need to know I just I can't believe you haven't been following it it's not that I I guess not that I haven't been following it I literally thought to myself I said I haven't been

like I guess up to date like if there was new um like revel revelations in the case um but I was like surely if there was I would see them to click on them to read about them but I haven't been like googling it so I thought okay if they found him dead or alive like I would definitely see that but evidently I didn't so it does say on this article from CNN that determining the cause of death could be tricky because the skeletal remains um he was only able to be identified initially through dental records um and that it would be a much more difficult thing to do to make a good solid determination as the cause and manner of death um unless there was any unless there was like some kind of serious trauma possibly to the skull that could be identified

but there is a very good chance that there might not be a way to determine how he died like if he drowned um there wouldn't be any evidence of anything like that on his skeleton so that's actually infuriating because Gabby Petito's family deserves justice and it's infuriating knowing that not only does he essentially get away with murder but also you can't even see like anything about him or have any answers to like did his parents have anything to do with it does his family help him um no nobody pays for you know what was done well so before the FBI located him um or his skeletal remains the parents did join the search and found a bag that belonged to their son at the park um and the attorney described that as happenstance

I'm still I'm not convinced on the fence about that um and the attorney said they kind of knew his favorite spots and had told law enforcement from the beginning like where Brian most likely would be in the areas of the park um and said that this area was flooded when they had looked earlier um and then it was asked to the parents if they believed that Brian would take his own life and the attorney for the laundries said that he had discussed the possibility with them several times and um that they just didn't know but of course knowing his middle state when he walked out that that had always been a concern to the parents so um they did the lawyer did say that the parents knew that their son was grieving when he left grieving that's the word that's the

word that was used that there's that they knew Brian was grieving and had been extremely upset and that's what the laundries attorney told Good Morning America um when asked why the parents thought he was grieving and Steve said that they just wish that they could have stopped him and prevented him from going out but he was intent on leaving and um he also said that the parents currently were a mess right now just like completely distraught um I think that that's fair to say that you would be distraught when you've lost your child because I didn't see a good outcome from this regardless however I am very upset by the outcome because to me it's just like a cowardly way to go if you did kill right like how how fucking convenient for them for him to just

take his own life after he did this yeah and and I mean the poor potatoes I'm just like they for them to potentially even have to have the thought of never having answers that is awful so sad that is so sad well I'm glad that we um just continued chatting and kept going you know um Will's now texting me asking me if Jackson did his journal homework and I'm like look in the journal well if you can get back to um if you can get to Jackson's practice I hope you can I won't keep you any longer um well I love you I love you so much I love you back and if you guys have not followed us at coffee combos podcast on instagram follow us there if you have not subscribed to our show you can do that on the purple podcast app spotify or any other

podcast app of your choice hope you guys enjoyed our ramblings of the week and we will chat with y'all soon see you