Coffee Convos with Kail Lowry and Lindsie Chrisley - 213: It's Caramel NOT Carmel!

Episode Date: March 31, 2022

The Q&A continues! Can the honeymoon phase last forever? Is Bradley Cooper stanky if he doesn't wear deodorant? What Kail can't stop thinking about throughout sex, Lindsie shares her thoughts on the Will Smith/Chris Rock incident, and we do some Duggar talk! Thanks to our sponsors! CBDx: Visit CBDX.com and use code COFFEE for 20% off your first order Cocofloss: Go to Cocofloss.me/coffeeconvos get 20% off sitewide Peloton: Visit onepeloton.comto learn more!  Wondery: Listen to Sydnee in the Sheets at Wondery.com 

I hate gift giving and receiving receiving gifts is so weird. What do you say? Thank you? This is coffee convos with Kale Lowry and Lindsay Chrisley. I really want you to be in your feels Kale That does not interest me whatsoever. I feel very attacked by you a spirited discussion about motherhood friendship Family and life in the public eye. I'm just not with the fakery anymore. There's a fakery bakery around here. Here's Kale and Lindsay Hello, hello, is anyone there? It's coffee convos podcast Wait, is this your own skit that you just came off with? Yeah, you didn't like it. You're not okay. I'll try I'll try again next week I was hoping that it was gonna be a singing one since everyone loved my singing last week and said that I should either go on the

Mask singer or American Idol, so I I never listened back to podcast our podcast episodes because I get embarrassed at the sound of my own voice, but for whatever reason I listened back last week and I was Crying at your singing. Why like cuz it was so good But it was funny kill Tell me were you making fun of me? Were you laughing with me or were you laughing at me? Yes. No, of course. I was always laughing with you. I'm never laughing at you bitch

Instagram story like I'm in a fighting mood. It's like that. It's like Bitch, I want to fight or something. I'm never at it. Let me go look. Okay. Play the Okay, the music we're stating stories That's why you like this that's my mood right right now and all day by the way My closets are complete and never been in a happier mood. Honestly back patio Stuff's going on that'll be complete headed to the beach next week So, you know, everything's looking good on this front, but I do have a couple of questions for you. Actually, okay

What are the questions? One are you well? I am well. I am well today. Are you well? No, why but that's that's just never at this point So, you know, I'm I'm thriving but like not and The next thing that I was gonna ask you is how's hot neighbor hot neighbors good He is Actually, I don't know. He I think he's good. I think he's great. What do you mean? We don't know I saw him. He was he had this like

So the only thing separating my house from his house is like besides a driveway is up is barns He is like barns and like a garage and stuff that like literally are in between the house the houses and yesterday I got I got home. He had this like I don't think it was a tractor it was some sort of like machinery that you like sit in and you like move dirt around and Kind of like like a digger. It was like isn't it called like a Batco I don't know what the fuck it was called, but he was in it driving it around and like Doing dirt stuff and I was just like wow like Imagine knowing how to operate this type of machinery. I feel like okay and anyone can relate to this

I know that they can when you really start liking someone Everything that they do is so impressive until it's not anymore Wait, I need an example. I need an example right now Okay, well, I'll just give you an example of stuff that will used to do Okay, like when we first started dating we would have sleepovers and he would always make eggs and they were so foul But I thought it was like the greatest thing ever. What are you that he made eggs? Yeah, I was like wow like he really was raised so well like he knows how to make eggs like he knows how to make sweet tea like This guy really has it together and then

at some point I just really fucking hated the eggs and You know that's where the downhill slide started happening and it was like non-recoverable wait Where where is that line in like any type of relationship, right? Like when you're with anyone hat where is that line like when does the thing when do the things that were impressive? No longer impress you and it's just like not enough. Is that like when you're not in love with them anymore Or it's just like you get used to it or This is a big topic that I feel like we need to spend a little bit of time on because I

Don't really know a direct answer to this and that's pretty typical for me because I never really know a direct answer for anything But I can tell you that I think it's Maybe when you start falling out of love like in my opinion and in my experience When I look back on it, I'm like, okay, those were good indications of like we shouldn't be doing this anymore But we're just doing this because it's like a comfortable thing Um, I I have to say as you were saying that I was thinking about all of the Relationships that I've been in that were I didn't actually love them or was in love with them

I was just like infatuated with them and then that eventually goes away. I don't know if even infatuated was the right word But like you should still be in the honeymoon phase for like a year or two years I feel like a year or two years if I make it to a honeymoon phase with anybody for two years I might get married against sweetheart. Wait, really? Because I just feel like my honeymoon phase is lasted like There's no reason why I should have dated someone for like two years and we're already out of the honeymoon Like I just feel like that's weird. Okay. Wait. This is just turned into a straight. It's not that's a red flag Okay, this is just turned into like a straight-up red flag podcast and also like this is a relationship podcast podcast I feel like um

Okay, I need to do here. Did you see my tiktok from Lux what Lux said? No, what did he I probably did see it But I I'm gonna play it right now because I was dying Okay, so I had asked him what do I do for a living and he said well you run and draw and then huh when he realized What the other boys had said yeah, that's what he said first of all, I'm not running nowhere I I've not run in nowhere except for my from my problems But he was he heard the boys what they said podcasting and stuff. So he wanted me to ask him again I'm gonna play it. Okay. Lux wanted me to ask this again because I replayed the video where I asked him what I do for work So what do you think I do for work?

podcast and And work yeah, yeah, what do you think a podcast is? Talking to people okay, that's a pretty good answer and do you want to come on my podcast? You do what would we talk about? You're shitty draw He said he wants to talk about relationships because he wants me to have a boyfriend so bad. So bad, I-

Why did he say that? I didn't even know he knew the word relationships, but like, anyhow- Lux is trying to act like he's grown, first of all. I don't know why he is doing, like, where did he come from? Why does he know the word relationships? He's four years old.

But like, back to the situation about relationships, like, do you not feel like the, before you're married, say, whether there's kids involved or not, you don't feel like two years in that you should still be like, I don't know, maybe I've like over-romanticized or like over, like I'm being unrealistic. No, I feel like if you do the relationship right,

the honeymoon phase shouldn't end. Like, there should still be elements of the honeymoon phase forever. But that brings me to a point last night, Caroline and I were being a little trashy girls and we were drinking white claws and eating some pizza and we were having conversations about sex and relationships and does it change over time?

And at what point does that change? And I definitely think that it does change over time. I think that it could go one of two ways. I think it could get better or I think it could get worse. I, do you think it could get better over time? Yeah, yeah. Because you get more comfortable with a person. So I feel like the more comfortable you become,

then the more comfortable you become in the situation. Totally. So for that aspect, like I, I've never been a person who could, and I say this to not judge other people. This is not me judging other people whatsoever. I, it takes me a really long time to warm up with someone for set, like in having sex.

So like I wouldn't be able to just like hook up, just to hook up only because I wouldn't be comfortable, I wouldn't be comfortable enough to like relax enough to be able to like get off or anything. So for me, after like several times of having sex, then I'm like, okay, now I can be comfortable enough to like be, to have good sex. Does that make sense?

See, I wouldn't have sex with someone until I was like comfortable enough in that situation with the person that I could enjoy it. Does that make sense? Like I need to. So like when you're, when you have sex with someone, maybe, I don't know, because you're just like newly not with Will anymore.

So like, I don't know if you're the right person to ask, but like- I mean, I was having sex with Will. So what, what's the question? Oh, okay. Okay, okay. Yeah, for a while. So when I first,

I'm literally putting my dick on the table with this one. Up until eight, eight or nine weeks ago, but continue, go ahead. So if I'm having sex with someone, like say it's someone new, and I'm like in a relationship with them, cause I don't just do random hookups. And the entire time for the first at least 10 times,

I'm like, wow, is he looking at my cellulite? Oh wow, did I miss a spot shaving? Oh my God, like do I, I'll smell my armpits. Do I stink? Like what, like I am so insecure. I literally am thinking that they're gonna see

the stretch marks on my thighs or is like, did I miss a spot shave? Like it's just awful. Like I hate it. Kale, I feel like- Do not do that. No. Do I stink?

Am I? Do I smell that? Even though I just took a shower, do I have BO? Like what if I don't do enough? I've never smelled you. What if I don't do enough? What if I don't do enough?

I've never smelled you. Do you not think about this when you have sex? You're not a stinky person first of all. Like that's just weird. Or say I have sex with them and it's like, I didn't shave my legs because I just shaved my legs, not last night, but the night before. And then I'm like,

you know that period between like shaving and then like getting your hair back? It's like, it kind of hurts. It's like, it's like pokey. Like what if I have sex during that time and then I put my legs around their neck and then like my feet- Oh, this escalated.

My feet are on their shoulders and like my leg hairs are stabbing them in the fucking neck. Like, you don't think about this stuff? No, no one. I feel like no one really thinks about this stuff. Okay, I have a couple things. No, everyone does. I have a couple things.

One, you say legs and eggs. I say legs and eggs. Okay, legs and eggs. That's first of all. Secondly, I feel like the fact that you're thinking so hard into that, that there's no possible way that you could be enjoying any experience

because you're thinking of all of the negative things that are going on. Like I'm pretty sure that he's not worried about being stabbed to death by your second day leg hairs. They're wrapped around his neck. Like I don't think that's a thing. Oh my God. Like what do I need to know as a man,

like what goes through their heads the first time they have sex? Like I'm thinking about- We should pull it. We should pull it. Okay, so when I, if I'm on my back and my boobs like fall to the side- Wait, are you trying to lay down?

You sound like you're trying to lay down. No, listen to me. I worry about what does it look like from, if I'm like, if we're in missionary, what does it look like if my boobs are like flopped to the side, like my, I have huge boobs. Like what is, does it look bad? Like does they just like,

I shouldn't be having sex. That's the bottom line. Wouldn't that be nice to know like what the angles looked like? I need to know. But like they probably would wanna know as well, you know? No, that they don't care. Men don't care about anything.

Which is further proves that they don't care about your pokey second day hairs. Like they don't- How do we pull this without being super graphic? You pull it graphically, I feel like. Should I just text? No, who are we pulling? I feel like we're pulling Instagram, not text messages.

Like who are we texting? I can just text. And you're the type of person that when you pull something, like you will not talk to somebody for like four weeks and then all of a sudden they get a text. And it's like, do you care if someone has second day unshaven legs

that are wrapped around your neck? I need an answer really quick. It's like no one is answering you on this one. They answer me every time. It's so funny. Delta 8 THC is the new cannabinoid that is sweeping the hemp and health and wellness market. CBDX.com sells Delta 8 products

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Four letters CBDX.com. Do not drive or operate machinery when using these products. Please be responsible. I need to know a follow-up if you checked your son's underwear for shit stains. I did and I didn't see any. But you know what?

It might have been a good week. It might have been a good week. I don't know. They weren't turtling. They were not. Thank God. Oh my God, that's so disturbing. You said that's so disturbing.

Wait, okay. So I have a couple of Q and A questions that we didn't get to that we definitely need to get to. Okay, fine. First one. Why does shit follow y'all everywhere that you go? I thought we answered that one.

Did we answer it? We answered that one. I don't feel like we came up with an answer. I don't think you answered that one. I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that we have manifested shit following us everywhere that we go. Because we talk about it so much

that inevitably it's going to find us. But can I just say that that being said, if I am recapping something or I'm responding to someone else's bullshit, that is a response. It's not me starting shit. It's not us starting shit. It's just, well, the recaps of anything or.

Chill. I'm pretty sure they're talking about physical shit. Oh. Like diaries and turds. Oh, well, it seems that I always have a stomach bug around the time that I have to be with Lindsay. Okay. So you thought this question was like drama.

Yes. I'm not the drama. Am I the drama? No. I feel like you're absolutely correct. I feel like when anytime anything is said on Coffee Combos podcast, then people just inevitably have a problem with it

because we have the fluffers. We have the kiddie gang and people just get really upset because our people go hard. I was under the impression that this question was about actual physical shit. And I don't know. Lindsay stepped in shit at the Airbnb.

I still don't know what was in that target video. People said that it was milk duds, but I'm pretty sure it wasn't because I looked closely and I saw no caramel. Like none. Got it. Which leads me to ask the question, is it caramel or is it caramel?

It's caramel, but I think sometimes I do say caramel, but if I think about it and if I see it, I'm gonna say caramel, but I think sometimes I accidentally say caramel. But why? Like why would you accidentally say that? Actually, I was talking to my attorney yesterday and he made me think about this

because he said he'll be reading with his son and he's like six and a half years old. And he said they'll get to like page six and he'll be like, I can't really remember this word. And he's like, what the fuck do you mean you can't remember this word? You said this word 21 times before we got to this page.

It's the, the. No. And it's like- You said 21 times? Yeah, like 21 times. Like why are we just now like getting to this point that we're forgetting words that we knew a page ago? Like a sentence ago actually.

Like you just said it in the sentence right before this. I think that's more common than we think. So then why are you out here saying caramel? I don't know. That's how I pronounced it my whole life until I don't know I opened my fucking eyes and realized it was spelled caramel. And so then when I realized it was spelled caramel,

then I was like, I should say caramel instead of caramel. But sometimes like my childhood comes back to me and smacks me in the face and it's like caramel, but it's really caramel. You know what I mean? Wait, so you were the type of kid that you went to like McDonald's to get a Sunday. First of all, no, I never got a Sunday at McDonald's

in my entire life until I was an adult. Pardon? Like what? I never got a Sunday from McDonald's until I was an adult. How come? My mom never took me to McDonald's ever. The only time I ate at McDonald's was if my grandmother took me

and she never bought me a caramel Sunday ever. You would have been like, I'll take a caramel Sunday. And it's like, no, you won't because that doesn't exist. That was back when, I don't know why I thought about this the other day too. Like maybe my kids were eating chicken nuggets. I don't know, but whenever I specifically remember McDonald's chicken nuggets

before they were like all quote, white meat, unquote. And I remember sitting in the play place with my grandmother and it definitely was like whatever scraps were left. And I remember like it was like, there was like a hard part in it. And I was just like, I hate it. But now I know that it's like more white meat or white meat scraps.

I don't know. It literally hit in the back of my throat right now and it's making me churn. Like I am, my belly is churning. My throat's gagging. Sorry. That's foul and every person has bitten into a chicken nugget that has that hard part and it is so foul.

It's so bad. Not a fan. Actually, we were talking about dino nugget yesterday. Jackson and I were. And I said, what's the thrill? Like is it the texture? Is it because they're shaped like dinosaurs? It's everything.

It's all of the above. They just don't know other store bought chicken nugget compares like none. That's what he says. And then I want to know if people have ever put them in the air fryer. I have and I did try that. I don't, I don't know what it is.

And like maybe I'm doing something wrong but I just think that things don't taste as good out of the air fryer. Okay. So I am not the only person that feels like air fryers smell like burning plastic. Yes. And that's what my, when I put the dino, thank you

because I put the dino nuggets in the fucking air fryer and it literally, they literally came out tasting like burning plastic. Like they're already processed, they're already fake. They're processed food. They're not good for us. And we're going to then put it in the fucking air fryer and have them taste like plastic on top of them

already being not good for us. Like no, thank you. I'm not air fucking air frying shit. No, thank you, ma'am. I prefer the oven. Okay, next question. Same. What are your phone settings?

Are they in dark mode? Dark mode. I have dark mode and I do keep my phone on do not disturb a lot, not because I'm hiding anything but because I cannot do notifications. So like sometimes I've caught myself like right now my little text app, it says I have three text messages because we're recording, I don't want to read them

but I will open them so that the notification goes away and I cannot do notifications. So I do not have banners on my phone that tell me that I have stuff where my phone is in lock screen or if I am on TikTok or Instagram, my text messages do not drop down from the top because I never want to have to like stop what I'm doing

to go open a text message. And also if I hand my phone to someone, they don't need to know who's texting me. Okay, so in the event, I'm gonna send you a screenshot right now. It's probably going to cause you to have severe anxiety. Bye, get out, get out, no. Okay, so I have my phone set in dark mode.

If you don't, you're probably a serial killer and you should tune into our true crime. We will likely be investigating you in a couple of years. Notification settings, I have all of my notifications on at a certain time, I send everything to like that focus mode or whatever. And then it's also on do not, it's like focus and do not disturb at 850 PM.

And it does not come back on until 10 AM. So have enough time to like go to the gym, all that before my notifications start. And then I have gotten much better in the past probably three months with my text messages. Like you used to, I used to delete nothing out, but now I feel like I'm just in such a healthy place and therapy that I don't feel like I need to keep anything

because I know whatever the truth is for stuff. So I'm not like trying to pull out receipts on people. So... Oh, I am, I very am right now. We've traded places. We have traded places. And I only ever open a text message if I am going to answer it.

Never open it if I'm not going to. Okay, okay, I feel like that's fair. I, we've definitely traded places because I'm keeping everything and I'm coming with all these motherfucking receipts because nobody's going to say, lie on my name, say I did something I didn't do. Nobody's going to tell someone I hacked their account

to get information when you fucking sent it to me. I am keeping all fucking receipts. You said what you said and I have proof, here you go. I am absolutely not deleting anybody's text messages. So if anyone thinks that they're going to text me and it's going to remain confidential, it can and will be used against you in the court of law. In the court of coffee commas podcast.

In the court of coffee commas podcast, I'm coming with receipts. I will come with receipts. You know, there are certain things I will say that I know when and where I need to keep things and then there are certain things that I'm just like, you know what, you're not even. Worth it.

Yeah, you're not even worth the save. So get the fuck out of here. Sound settings, I turn my volume sound on when my focus mode goes off. Oh, I didn't even read the sound settings. Sound settings, I don't have sound settings. It's on vibrate at all times. I never have sound settings.

But you know what I just recently did, actually on the plane to Dallas whenever, what, when did we go last week? Yeah. I got sick of looking through my phone, my camera roll for like things that I needed. And like say we get a gallery from Dallas and then come fucking May,

I want to post something from that gallery. I get so sick of like looking for stuff or going to a gallery that I created photo albums in my phone. So I have like my plants, any picture that I take, I go in and immediately move it to plants and my dogs. Any pictures I take of my dogs, I immediately go over and remove it to my dogs

or not remove it, but put it in my dog's album. Same for everything else. Like I've made albums for everything so I don't have to spend so much time looking for the shit. Am I the only psychopath that has so many screenshots in my camera roll? I have currently screenshots 6081. Okay, why?

Like why are we like that? I just cleared all of mine out. And I'm like, why would I need a screenshot of a funny meme that's still funny? But like why do I need that in my camera roll? Like no chance I'm ever going back to that and finding it. Like I'll find recipes in there that I've never made, like funny memes, screenshots of people

that like I just don't like. And I'm like, why is that in there? And you're like, this is not, what am I doing here? Like this is not what I signed up for. I don't know why I have, I wish I had an answer for you. Okay, which one of you care about phone notifications? Well, obviously it's Kill.

I hate notifications. I hate, don't ever send me a voicemail because I hate voicemails more than anything. And I don't like voice notes. I only do voice notes if I'm like driving or something and I don't want to text and drive because I'm really trying to do that. Kill, you send me voice notes all the time.

But not like one after another. I will just like randomly send like a few if I'm doing something, like I'll send you one. Or like talk to texts and then we'll get a voice note after that. And it'll be like, sorry, I'm driving. I'm using talk to texts. It's like no shit.

Like I realize. But I just don't know if you're gonna like figure out what I'm trying to say because talk to text is so fucked up and that brings me to another thing. You know when you put like closed captioning on like your TikToks or your Instagram stories? I knew it.

I cannot stand when people don't correct their fucking closed captions. Like why are you not correcting them? Like I pissed my own self off when the other day I posted a TikTok of me and you and I forgot to change the spelling of Lindsay to like your spelling of Lindsay. And I really pissed my own self off

because you can't go back in and edit them. Why do you have closed captions on if you're not fucking making them say what you're saying? Why? Because it gives you the roundabout gist. No, it doesn't. It does. Like everyone who's watching that is like,

okay, they don't give a fuck if my name is misspelled. If someone has a speech impediment or if my kid, you can't understand my kid, the point of me putting the closed captions on or like if I mispronounce a word you can like fix it in the closed captioning. So if someone can't have the sound on or is deaf, actually deaf, knows what the fuck you're saying.

Like why do you even put them on? No, they don't. I don't. If someone, I'm trying to think of something that sounds like something else. Like if you lip the words olive juice, it looks like you're saying, I love you. It's the same thing with closed captions.

Yeah, but Kil, when they're making the closed captions, it's going off of what you're saying, right? So if you said olive juice, chances are it's not gonna be like, I heard, I love you. I disagree with you. You are worried about spellings of things that no one else cares about. Like.

Also words if the words are wrong, okay? Like it's okay. Like we're all gonna survive. We're all making it through today, through Instagram closed captioning. Like we are- Just fix your goddamn captions and then we don't have a problem.

All right guys, I have a quick question. Are you an everyday flosser, an aspiring flosser or trying to get folks in your life to floss? Like maybe your kids, because if that is you, that is also Kil and myself. And we are obsessed with cocoa floss. If you guys have never heard of cocoa floss, they deliver superior textured floss,

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I also just love this because of the packaging. You guys know I'm a sucker for packaging. My kids love it because they love the way it looks and they love the way it feels. So if you guys wanna try this out, go to cocoafloss.me slash coffee combos to get 20% off site-wide and free shipping. Again, that's cocoafloss.me slash coffee combos.

There is a four-piece set. You can try four different fragrances. You're gonna love it. It's C-O-C-O-F-L-O-S-S dot M-E slash coffee combos and the discount will be automatically applied at checkout. It's all lowercase, cocoafloss.me slash coffee combos. All orders over $20, ship free in the U.S. Hey guys, it's your girl Bea Rivera

back again with a brand new podcast. This time it's with my lifelong friend, me, Alessandro Gonzalez, and this is Vibe and Kind of Thrive-In Podcast. Tune in every Monday to hear all about our victories, our failures. You can't forget about the blockchain chain. That's gossip in Spanish, in case you didn't know.

So come vibe with us and be a part of this beautiful and kind of thrive-in sisterhood. Follow us on Instagram at Vibe and kind of thrive-in. We'll catch you on Mondays. Okay, funniest memory together. There's a lot. But I would have to say, wait, Kristen will kill me. I have that video on my phone of Kristen.

Literally, literally I have this video on my phone from Dallas. And it's Kristen showing Kill how to ride Dick. And that probably was the funniest thing ever. It's like a three slider and Kill is literally in the floor laid out, like passing away in this video. It, to be fair, to be fair, it was a new technique of riding.

Okay, well, whatever. It was a new technique that I have never used before. Obviously with four children, we know that there's some game. I don't have any game. I don't even know how I have four children. We don't know the answer to that, but that is a really funny memory of mine

that is ingrained in my head. Actually, every single day, since we've been back from Dallas, I've gone back and watched that before I went to bed and literally just like laughed my ass off. I just don't know what's wrong with us. I'm trying to think. I don't know.

We just like have lots of memes, like. I mean, we snuck out of Todd Crisley's house over the weekend, last weekend. We did. We snuck out. We did the gritty the whole way out. I was dead. People were like sending me messages about that TikTok

and they were saying, are you guys going to go into more detail about this or are you just going to like leave us here? Well, what is going to go into detail about it? Obviously, you're being left there. Like, you got what you got, okay? We give you an inch. Don't take a mile.

Yeah. Okay. Lindsay, what do you think parenting Lux is like? A dream? No. I'm obsessed with Lux. No. First of all, Lindsay has loved Lux since the day he was born

and it's so funny because over the weekend he had football and like Lux, I know his sport is baseball. It's very, very clear and apparent to me, but he keeps wanting to sign up for other sports and I let him because I think at some point he will actually like enjoy playing them. But like all the parents, it's just kind of like you singing, right?

Like we just laugh with him because he's in his own fucking world and like he's out there like just the team goofball on the football team. Like just the parents are just like, you know, go be like Lux. Like just go, he's happy to be there. You know what I mean? We love, we love a happy to be there. He doesn't know what's going on and I love that about Lux.

Don't count on him to score a touchdown because it's not going to happen, but he will make you laugh. Wait, Kale was like, I don't know what I should do. Like Lincoln has this and Isaac has this and Lux has this and I'm like, you know, naturally I'm going to be like, we got to go to Lux's game. We got to go watch him just skip up and down the field and like maybe pull a flag, but probably not.

He's a good time. He's a good time. He's the life of the life of the party for sure. But it's so funny because there's a little boy on his team that was also on his basketball team. And like when I tell you, like he's a Lincoln, like this other kid on the team is like a Lincoln, like you put a ball in his hand and he's going to be good at it.

No matter what sport it is, like he's going to fucking thrive and just do the damn thing. And like Lux is the complete opposite and it was just so funny because like he really likes the other kid. He'll like walk up to him and like talk to him and stuff. But I'm like, he's just definitely not. He's not a, he's not a Lincoln. He's just not.

I love it. Okay. Last question we're going to answer. If you had to set each other up on dates, who would you set the other up with and why? I want Anthony Davis and you can have Bradley Cooper. Oh, that's a good one. Wait, is Bradley Cooper the one that doesn't wear deodorant

because hygiene is a big thing for me. What? First of all, I don't know. How do you, why do you know that? Hold on, let me Google it. Is it Bradley Cooper? I don't think so. Does, does Bradley- Bradley Cooper wear anti-perspirant?

Wow. In an interview with Esquire, Cooper revealed that he does not wear deodorant but does typically take two to three showers per day. Okay. So the fact that he is, but celebrities who proudly refuse to wear deodorant include Matthew McConaughey, Britney Spears, Cameron Diaz, Courtney Cox, Gwyneth Paltrow, Diane Kruger.

Why do, how do people know that these people don't wear deodorant? Like they say, I guess they've confessed. Maybe they've confessed. Maybe native would be good for them. We don't know. But what I do know is I love the idea of the three-shower man. Okay, so you could do that with the deodorant? Well, we don't know about this because I'm like, okay, does the

three showers a day solve the problem for the lack of deodorant or is he still stank? Because if he is stanky, like I don't want any part of that. What's however. Courtney Kardashian actually said during a 2013 episode of Courtney and Kim Take Miami that she was changing over to an all-natural deodorant and Kim actually said she reeks only because she doesn't believe in wearing deodorant because she thinks it's bad for her breastfeeding or something.

Okay, so there's a lot of studies that go along with this and I'm not going to sound dumb. Sorry, Scott said that. I'm not going to sound dumb about this because I need to do some more research to bring some facts. But evidently, I think it's like the aluminum and stuff in regular deodorants. So... Super toxic.

There is something to be said for it, but... Still a question. Do you wear deodorant to bed? Ooh, that's a good question. And no, I do not. You do? I know several people who wear deodorant to bed. Well, I'm not going to lie.

Just in the event that I'm in a relationship, yes, I would. But if I'm sleeping by myself, no, I would not. Okay, so I take a shower right before I go to bed and put on my PJs, put my hair on top of my head, do all of my skincare and get in the bed. Never even think about putting on deodorant before bed. I don't know why. But that's a good question for us to pull to everyone who's listening. I would love to know and why you do it.

Do you actually like sweat and bed and get stinky? No, I'm just insecure, I think, with like, what if I smell, you know? Okay, so you set yourself up on that date. Like, I didn't even get a pick. Oh, okay. Well, could you pick for me? I feel like the person that I would pick would not be the... LeBron James.

Jackson would love that. Jackson would be thrilled. We would be at your house every day. He would be like, I need to go see Uncle LeBron. Like, I need to go over right now. I need to go play ball with Uncle LeBron. Yes. Honestly, Kale, I would not know who to set you up with.

Drake? That would be... Well, he has children. Actually, LeBron, Anthony, and Drake all have children, so they would all be a hard no for me, but they are nice to look at. You know, someone told me, and I'm not going to tell you guys who told me this, but it's an unfair expectation when you have children to, like, draw a line in the sand and be like, I won't be with someone else because they have kids.

It's unfair? Yeah, it's like an unfair expectation, right? I don't agree. I don't agree. I don't think that's unfair. I think it's unfair. I think that's unfair because then what if someone, I would be so upset if someone just like, asked me because they were like, oh, you have a son.

I wouldn't be upset about it. You wouldn't? No. No. Okay, well then that brings me, you have four kids and three baby dads. I can't fuck with you. I'd be like, okay, I understand. What man out here is 35 years old, 36 years old, 37 years old, around that age that does

not have children, does not have an ex-wife. Well your standards are also different than mine. I don't care to have a 35, 36, 37 year old. Now if we're going into, if we're going in that direction, if we're going where I'm looking at someone who's 35, 36, 37 and then said, no, I don't want kids either, well one, that would be weird. And two, then I'm questioning the guy because how are you 35, 36, 37? You want kids.

You've never, like it just, I don't know. Like I feel like that would be. This is a great question. What is your range for age for a man? Like if you were just like out on the prowl looking for you a man, are you looking anywhere from let's say 25 years old to 35 years old? Yeah. Okay, I'm not.

I also just don't think, I don't, the oldest person I've ever dated, like 32. I'm not looking under 35. Okay, so then that's, that's part of it is like, I don't. So maybe that's the difference. Like. Yeah. Because I think if I was to say, okay, I'm specific, like I won't be with anyone under the age of 35, then I'm, then I don't think that's fair for me to say 35 and no kids.

Like that I would think is fucked up. Yeah. Cause then it's like, okay, well then what was wrong with him that, you know, he never had a kid, never had a wife, never like maybe doesn't have a job. Like those would be some flags, you know, one of those, one of those flags you have collected in several relationships, but I'm trying to think of someone that I've dated that I don't think I've ever been with anyone that's five years older than me. I don't think I've ever been with anyone that's two over two years older than me.

I dated one person that was like 32, um, and that was it. I don't think, I mean, every single, all my baby dads, no, I'm lying. Javi and I are like, um, nine months apart. I'm older than him by nine months. Joe is older than me by like five. And then Chris is younger than me by two years. Oh, wow. So you would date younger.

See, I would not date younger than myself ever. So interesting, but like, how do you find someone that's older than you and above six feet? I just feel like you're just like, there's no, but for me, like six feet, six feet tall. I'm five, four and a quarter. So I'm like, I, you know, and then my family, no offense to any man in my family that's listening to this. If you lied on your driver's license and said that you're six foot, you're a liar.

Um, I'm pretty sure everyone, I just never find them that are that much tall. Everyone that I date is always like my height. I've never, besides Jordan Wenner in 2011 or whenever that was 2010, um, I have no, I don't think I've ever been with someone taller than me. Wow. Well, they're always like pretty much the same height, which is very frustrating. Will and I were like a foot difference. If I say 35 years old, at least six feet because I'm five foot eight and they have to have

no kids. Like I'm really just like limiting, like it just gets, the pool gets smaller and smaller. Wait, there was like something that I found, did I send it to you? It was like no man has all of these things. Did I send it to you? No, you didn't send that. No. Um, I'll have to find it on my, it might be in my screenshots that got deleted, unfortunately.

Um, but it was like no man has all of these things. And one of them was like good dick, uh, over six foot tall. I'll find it. You might have, you might have sent that to me. If I send it to you, then please find it in your archives because I've deleted everything off of my phone. So here we are. Um, yeah, I was going to say, I don't come from like very tall men, so I'm okay with

not having one. Will was just kind of like an outlier, uh, being a foot taller than me. Um, I'm okay with like a little under six foot. Like that's okay for me. Um, outside of that. I saw this article on the New York post and was so shocked because this is a book that Will's mom read to Jackson and she was a public school educator for like 30 years. And so I thought it was so interesting.

It says school official fired for reading kids book called I need a new butt to students. It says the assistant principal at a Mississippi school has been fired for reading a children's book called I need a new butt to second graders. Toby Price said he was asked to set up a zoom class for the kids at this elementary school. And when the principal failed to show up as planned, he was told to read them a book NBC news reported. I text my boss said, well, go ahead and read. I wasn't planning on reading, but I went ahead, grabbed one of my books that I had nearby.

One of my favorites. I read it. I need a new butt. It's hilarious. He said, adding that it has fun. It's a fun and silly book. As his previous school said that he never had an issue with this, he's read it before. He said that there are books that have much more suggestive material that are much more

widely accepted. But shortly after the class ended, Price said he was summoned to the principal's office and told that a parent might complain about the choice of the book and he was placed on administrative leave. The bummed educator said that to his knowledge, no parents have ever complained, but the school system said that they found it inappropriate due to its use of words like butt and fart. And it showed a lack of professionalism and impaired judgment. I'm looking up the book right now because I want to see three hilarious stories in one

noisy book. It's a little boy on the front cover and just shows his crack with his pants on it. I need a new butt, why, and he's like looking in the mirror and hold on, I need a new butt, mine's got a crack. I can see it in the mirror, a crack at the back. Did I do it on the slide or on the banister inside? Or when I jumped my BMX or with the fart that happened next? I just, like, I can't, what the fuck?

Why is this happening? Let me just say, do I think he should have been fired over it? I don't know. Do I think it's probably not like a school classroom type of book? No, I don't think it should be in a classroom. But like, to be fired over it, I don't know. What was his man thinking when he grabbed this off his shelf and was like, oh, I'm a ...

Let's set the tone here. This is a man that we're talking about. They already just are not. Yeah. And he probably, because he's a man, he thought it was funny or whatever, but like, I don't know. Like, why is he fired for this? If Jackson came home and told me that this was going on at his school, I would be like,

what did you learn about having a crack in your ass today? Like, I would not be upset about this at all. I wouldn't either. And then just the fact that they were so serious and determined that they were saying a lack of professionalism and impaired judgment. Can you imagine getting... Okay, impaired judgment maybe, but like, even that I feel like is reaching. Impaired judgment, ma'am.

I'm like, okay, okay, we are not okay. I need to know what everyone thinks. Like, would you be upset if an assistant principal read, I need a new butt to your child at school because I'm not upset? I'm upset. I'm upset he got fired over it, yeah. Did you watch the Oscars last night? I don't have cable and internet, ma'am.

Okay, well, so you did not see Will Smith getting our Will Smith slap in Chris Rock in the face on stage? Hot Neighbor, I told you, Hot Neighbor ran a cable cord across my driveway and so like, it's very spotty. Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't and it's only for Wi-Fi, not for cable, but that being said, I did wake up to a slew of text messages about Will Smith. Did he smack him or did he punch him, punch Chris Rock? No, he slapped him across the face.

So Lindsay, I'll let you take the reins on that one. Okay, so yeah, so Will Smith slapped Chris Rock in the face on stage at the Oscars after he made a joke about Jada Peek and Smith and what he said was, Jada can't wait for G.I. Jane to in an apparent, in an apparent reference to her shaved hairdo as a result of the hair loss condition, alopecia, Smith walked on stage struck Rock before returning to his seat and shouting, keep my wife's name out of your bleep mouth. He later apologized to the Academy and a tearful acceptance speech for Best Actor. He also said that he wanted to apologize to all of his fellow nominees, but no specific

apology for Rock. I think that it was very, and I've always kind of had an issue sometimes with comedians taking things a little bit too far and especially when I didn't know this is the first I knew that she had a hair loss condition. Like I didn't know that. I thought that she just was rocking that look and it works for her. So that's what I thought. So I had no idea, but obviously Will was very triggered by this.

Someone texted me that I guess Will laughed about it at first. I don't know if this is true. I don't know. But in the text message that someone sent me said that he thought it was funny at first, but then realized that it upset Jada. Yeah, she rolled her eyes because Will had initially laughed, clapped his hands before he was seen on stage walking up. So I don't know if this was like a, was this premeditated?

Was this like he got close and then just got like pissed off? Was he trying to cause a scene? I don't know. To me, this is just like very inappropriate. The joke or him smacking him or both? Both. Like the reaction to the joke and the joke itself, like the entire thing was inappropriate. Okay.

I didn't see it. I can't really speak on it too much, but it's, you know, I knew that Jada... I want to know what other people were thinking when they saw this. Like, oh, okay. Do they show it on TV? Like it was shown? Yeah, it was shown. Like and that's where we are today.

That's what we're doing. Okay. So, I wasn't okay with it. I'm pretty sure the people who are in my DMs about it this morning were not okay with it. And yeah, so that's it on that. All right, guys, we regularly talk about Peloton because we are absolutely obsessed, but Peloton is pushing you further with so much new on the Peloton bike and Peloton bike

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Moving on, I have some Duggar updates and surprisingly, Kale, the amount of people that have been in my DM sending me stuff that they must live close or have some type of relation to their religion or something like that because do you ever get DMs and you're like, okay, these people know something because it's too detailed. Do you ever get that? No. Not specifically about the Duggars, but just about anything. I...

And like, okay, obviously those people know something. Wait, actually, yeah, someone just messaged me right now. About the Duggars? No. They just said, actually, I used to work at a center, blah, blah, blah, which I think I remember you had slash still have a therapist there. You just know too much. What are you trying to...

What are you getting at here? Yeah, see, that's what I'm talking about. I feel like it's like people who know stuff. Oh, and then before... Yeah. Actually, I'll do it after we talk about the Duggars stuff because I was very triggered by this comment and I posted it on my Instagram story and then never followed up on it because I planned to follow up on it here, but I was just like very upset and then got a ton of

messages about it. But for this week, Duggars stuff is going to be pretty short. The following segment contains mentions of sexual assault and child abuse. We are picking up on February 23rd, 2016, TLC has announced at this point, counting on would be a regular show on their network, March 10th, 2016, Josh's family released a statement about Josh's release from rehab and a statement is as follows, Josh has completed his residential rehabilitation program. We are so thankful for everyone who worked with Josh in this program.

It was a crucial first step in recovery and healing for Josh. Josh has now returned to Arkansas where he will continue professional counseling and focus on rebuilding relationships with his family. We look to God for help and guidance and place all our trust in him. We are forever grateful for the love and prayers offered by so many and hope you will continue to pray in the days ahead. I have a couple thoughts on this and they're the same thoughts that I've had about every single statement pretty much that's made.

I don't want to discredit their journey with Christ, however, it seems like that every statement that is ever made, it's always like a fall back on to God for the things that he's done. It's like, okay, yes, he's done these things, but we're leaning on God and we're going to get through this and he is forgiven and he is this and he is that. I don't like that. I don't really like that and I also am a firm believer that this entire thing with Josh Duggar was a PR play.

They sent him away to this residential rehabilitation program because they did not have any other choice from the public having all of this knowledge. Would they have done the same thing if this had not been publicly uncovered? I don't think so. I really, really don't think so. I think that when there has been a pattern of repeated behavior as parents, you also have to stand your ground to let your position be known. There's a very fine line there when you're defending your child but also holding them

accountable and I think their version would probably be, oh, well, we held him accountable because we sent him to a residential rehabilitation program and that was his accountability. But I think that they have downplayed all of these things that he's done and also not allowed his victims to have the voice that they should have felt comfortable enough to have because of their constant downplay. It's all like manipulation tactic and like, I don't want to say gaslighting but kind of when you're like, oh, like, it's okay because God forgives us. No, it's literally not okay.

It's the things that were done are not okay. So moving on March 17th, 2017, Josh and Anna Duggar released a pregnancy announcement on the Duggar family website and I am mind blown by this. Again, it goes back to the Duggar family website. To me, that just feels, I don't want to say cold but very cold. Why are we using, again, a family website to release all of these statements? It's kind of self-serving and also brings attention to the website. It's like a distraction kind of.

And it's just like, okay, you just what, 10 days or however long prior, it was a year. So you're looking, March 10th, 2016 was when he was released from the residential rehabilitation program. March 17th, 2017 is when they announced another pregnancy. So you're talking like one year between that time. That just seems a little odd to me. So the statement was, for nearly the last two years, we have quietly worked to save our marriage, focus on our children and rebuild our lives together as a family.

Doing so is never easy after a breach of trust. We've learned that life of faith and rebuilding a life together is simply done one day at a time. As we continue our journey as a family and rebuild our lives, we are delighted to share with you that we are expecting a new baby. Later this year, beauty comes from the ashes and we cannot wait to see and kiss the face of this sweet new boy. I feel so sad for Anna because I don't know how you truly believe that I have a strong

relationship with Christ and this would not be something that I would ever be able to get over and move on from and stay married to a man like this. I feel like what is it teaching you? I understand that for people who do believe in God and Jesus Christ and things like that, there is some level of forgiveness and as long as you can look at yourself in the mirror and you can live with yourself day to day. I get that, but also this specifically, what is it teaching the women? It's teaching them to not have boundaries.

It's teaching them that they should stay no matter what. It's teaching them that you should be walked all over. You should be essentially abused, manipulated, conned, like all of these things and you should still stay. It just doesn't make sense to me. Well, and then outside of that, I'm just like, I wouldn't be able to sleep at night just feeling like knowing what had been done and having young daughters in the home. I wouldn't be able to sleep or just not think about it.

It would be a constant thought that would be in my mind. Ever since I became interested in covering this, it's been a constant thought that's ran through my mind. I just think about, okay, so when I was in a relationship and said person cheated on me with a grown woman who is of age and that was the adult choice that they made, I couldn't even let that go. How does a wife with children, with this man, let go of him sexually assaulting young children and women and not think about it regularly on a regular basis and let it go and try to

move on? It's just, I don't know. I don't know how you could do it. I don't want to say that she's strong for that because I don't know that that's strength. I think that she is manipulated and controlled and that her decisions are likely placed on her to make the decisions that she's making. I just feel bad because I feel like it's truly not fair to her because this is how she grew up and this is what she's doing as an adult, but she doesn't have to live like that.

There is happiness out there, genuine happiness that you're not manipulated into and genuine men who would truly provide and care for her and her children in the way that she deserves and the way that her children deserve, but this is not it. But could you imagine being so deeply invested in this religion and this lifestyle that they live and knowing that she probably wanted to divorce her husband, but knowing that that really wasn't fundamentally an option and feeling that level of stuck, but then you have all of these other people around you. For us, it's very easy to be like, okay, I don't really care what anyone thinks.

I'm going to divorce this man. But the life that she likely lives looks very different than having that type of control to be able to make those decisions. It's not that easy to say, I don't care what anyone thinks because the same people, when I divorced Harvey, people may have been like, oh no, stick it out, but we're going to support you regardless kind of thing, whatever decision that you ultimately make, we're going to support you or even anything that any decision I've made since then, not involving my marriage is like my friends, my support system, they may not agree with what I'm doing, but they're

going to be there for me regardless. I don't think that that's the same for her. I think she's in a situation where she literally will have nobody. And yeah, it's nice to have like outpouring fans and supporters, but at the end of the day, you don't know them, you don't, you're not going to be able to confide in them the same way that you would confide in the people that are actually in your present circle. And I guess a big question that I have if she would have chosen that route, which I feel she has every right to and some, would the family have still supported her and her children

in the same way? I don't think they would. I don't think they would have either. And that, that sucks. Like that is freaking horrible because I think about my relationship and I know it's very different, but just like for context, um, I look at my, you know, I, I still have a great relationship with Harvey's sister to this day, you know, and I'm trying to put myself in a place where I'm like in Anna's shoes.

I couldn't imagine if I was in, what if me and Lydia hated each other? You know what I mean? Like that would be so hard for me because she's been so neutral and she has supported her brother, but also, you know, I am Lincoln's mom. And so we've had a good relationship. Like I can't imagine us hating each other or her hating me because I chose to leave. Like that would be a horrible feeling. And I wouldn't, that alone would make me not want to leave because I would have shitty

relationships with everybody that are involved in, that are related to my children. Well, that was a reason why I stuck it out so long with Will was because I knew what the repercussions were going to be when I finally did divorce. And I knew exactly what was going to happen and it's exactly what happened. Like I don't know if I'll ever speak to these people again. And these were people that I invested so much time of my life in. I mean, in the grand scheme of things from 19 years old until 32, those are pivotal years of your life, 12 years of time.

And I haven't spoken to these people in over a year, like, and I've seen them pretty regularly. That's weird. It's like, it's weird. And it's, yeah. Well, and it's uncomfortable. I mean, no matter how you look at it, no matter how you slice it, it's still not a fun feeling because at the end of the day, like you guys have like, I don't know, but I'm just assuming like if you guys have negative feelings towards each other, but it's still sad.

Even if you, even if the negative feelings are mutual because at the end of the day, these people are related to Jackson and Jackson does spend time with them. And so like that's not how it's just not, I can't imagine for Anna, but like also what do you do? Like what? Yeah, I don't know. I don't know what the solution is. I'm like, because I don't think that either solution, either choice for her is going to

be a positive, like she's damned if she does, damned if she doesn't. Correct. Yes. You know, that's the outcome. If you're too tired of sex podcasts that only focus on how to please your man, then Sydney and the Sheets is a podcast for you. In each episode, Sydney Page and her friends talk about incredible ways to help you transform your life in and out of the bedroom.

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To listen to Sydney and the Sheets, follow the show on Apple Podcasts, Amazon Music, Spotify, or wherever you listen. You can also listen, add free by subscribing to the Wondry Plus and Apple Podcast or the Wondry App. Okay. So I had received this message on the Southern T, but since I am not recording for that show this week, I have to talk about it on here because I was just like very upset by this and I wanted to get your opinion.

Please keep me anonymous if you discuss this, but I have very strong opinion about something and I'd like your opinion as well since I believe it happened to you. I mean no shade by this, by the way, love you and your podcast. I will never understand accidental pregnancy. In this day and age, there are so many forms of birth control. You can only feel so bad if someone ends up pregnant and didn't mean to. So oh wow, this is a hot topic and listen, I have four kids and I've been pregnant more than four times.

This is something that I think about regularly actually, like I agree, I mean the pull out method actually can work also, like if you do it properly and it's like the pull out method is an option, but like yeah, you're right, there's the birth control pills and the ring and the Implanon and the, you know, the IUDs and Morena and Condoms and all of that, but like also we're human and a lot of us are stupid. There's male birth control that's like in clinical trials right now. Yes, right now, but I don't know if it'll ever, I mean give all the women the side effects, but men, we can't really put this out on the market because of the side effects.

I think sometimes when emotions are involved, humans, people, us, men and women can be stupid. We don't think, we're not thinking clearly in the moment and that is part of human error, I would say. I think that they're, I'm 30 years old and I still don't know all there is to know about just sex and having sex and children and I don't know. I just, how does- I don't believe in accidental pregnancies though, like I don't think any child is an accident. No, that's my stance on it.

Okay, okay. Like I think that- Like it was essentially meant to be. Like if you end up pregnant, it wasn't an accident, it was because it was meant to be, is what you're saying. Yes, yes, and I don't, I don't believe in accidental children. Like yeah, the circumstances surrounding it, like you might not have been protecting yourself in a way to be able to prevent a pregnancy from happening, however, I still believe that

everything happens for a reason and that there is no such thing as an accidental pregnancy. Can I also just speak on like younger, well, anybody, I'm not even gonna say younger. I think a lot of people think that they are invincible or they think that getting pregnant is harder than it actually is sometimes for some people and so they think, oh, if I don't pull out this one time, it'll be fine or if I don't pull out this these two times out of 30 days in a month, probably not gonna get pregnant. Like nobody actually thinks that, like if they're not actively trying, they don't actually think it's gonna happen.

Even though that's very dumb and even though it's like clearly that's not true, I think that's what a lot of people think. It's like, oh, one time's not, like we can look at Drake and his baby mom, for example, you know what I mean? Like look at, there's so many examples. I mean Tristan Thompson's a big one. I mean, how he couldn't have seen her very often. I mean, I'm sure he'd saw her a few times, but like, what are the chances that she ends

up pregnant in one of the handful of times that they saw each other? You get what I'm saying? Like, I think people just genuinely don't think about how. Like if you're trying to get pregnant, slide interest in Thompson's DMs. Please don't do that to my girl Chloe. I'm just like, I can't. But I don't, I truly, I think that you're so right on everything that you're saying, but I just do not, I don't believe that babies are accidents ever.

And I even said that when you were pregnant with Lux, like, or Creed, I don't believe that accidents like that happen. And so he was meant to be here. And so I just actually hate when people say, oh, that was like an accidental baby or yeah, it could have been unplanned, but it wasn't an accident. I just, I, there's so much that I could say, but I don't want to be controversial and I don't want it to be like, because I look at my, I look at my four kids and like, I, I don't know.

Like I can't really, I can't speak on it, but I can. But if I do, I'm a hypocrite. You know what I mean? Like it's very hard for me to be the one that's like talking about it because people, people are committed to making me a hypocrite versus speaking from experience. Well, do you believe in accidental pregnancies? I, I don't because and not, and not for the same reasons that you don't. I just feel like if two adults are having sex and they're having unprotected sex, you

weren't planning it, but you weren't fucking preventing it. So to say, oh, I got pregnant by accident or I got pregnant by mistake, no, you chose that. Yeah. And that doesn't mean that you didn't, for example, just by me saying that, I'm not saying that you thought you were gonna, I think you can still not prevent it. You chose it, but also didn't think that you were going to get pregnant. Like I still think that's possible.

Like people are so set on things being so black and so white and they're just, it's just not, there's just, it's just not that way. You could literally not plan it, not prevent it and also still be dumb enough to think it couldn't happen to you. But to your point and how you feel is like, well, then maybe the baby was meant to be here. I don't know. Like I just, I, there's just no black and white.

I just, that your, that question, actually I'm, my blood is starting to boil because I just, it's just not that black and white. It's definitely not. And then I wanted to follow that up with, that's how rumors get started because wherever has anyone come up with the idea that my pregnancy was accidental? Like I don't know. Is that where, is that where the question is coming from, saying that your pregnancy was, oh, okay.

And I'm like, wait, what? Like no, it was very planned and very tried for like, I even put a pillow under my butt and put my legs up in the air to make sure nothing got out. Like it was very planned, ma'am. Oh wait, does Todd know that? And now he does. Now he's going to be like, what the fuck? No, I'm just kidding.

I don't know him. But okay. So you, okay. I actually didn't know that. That's news to me. That's, that's new information. Well, I mean, yeah, I'm not just like walking around on the reg, just being like, this is what happened, but yeah, it was definitely planned.

I wanted a baby and to be a young mom and very much, you know, tried for that. I think I got pregnant on my third cycle and, what does that mean on your third cycle? You know, like I had two periods and then was like pregnant on the third one. So like we were trying for two cycles and then I got pregnant on the third cycle. Got it. Got it. Okay. Got it.

See, I'm 30 years old. I had a third cycle. What is that? Like third cycle. Since you started trying. Yes. Got it. Got it.

You know why you didn't get it? Cause you're like, okay, I was never technically trying. I was just enjoying the moments and the only one that I, well, no, I can't say that the only one, the only one of my living children that I like tried for and I literally could not get pregnant was Lincoln. And we, I physically went and had my IUD taken out and we tried for several months. And I didn't get pregnant. And then I saw him one time on Valentine's Day when he graduated from basic training

for the military. And I was 21 years, I was about to be 21 years old and I had no idea. First of all, my app said I wasn't ovulating that day. And I was like, I literally got to have sex with him one time. And from the time that he left for basic training until then, and how did I end up pregnant after one time having sex after not seeing him for two months? Like, and I was trying before that, you know what I mean? So like again, I had no idea, like I just didn't think it would happen.

We love this. We love stories like this. But yeah, I definitely had a planned, a very planned and wanted and prayed for baby. And so there's that. And you know, that's a pretty heavy topic to end on. So I think we're going to, you know, switch this up a little bit before we go and do the foul play. And Kale, you're reading it this time.

Great. Love that for me. Can't wait. Okay. Here we go. This is a foul play. Shit story time. Y'all have manifested these poop stories, which again, I also, I think that poop does

follow us everywhere. Yesterday, I got my son out of the bath and took him to the couch to dress him. I noticed something in the crease of the couch. I picked it up and squished it around a little. It was an old fruit snack or so I thought. About 10 minutes later, my four year old yelled, ill mommy, there's poop on the couch. I said, no, it's not poop. It's a fruit snack.

Remember, remembering that I needed to throw it away. I picked it up and realized, holy shit, this is a turd. I must have rolled it out of my two year old diaper after my husband changed him. I almost died and just prayed. I didn't just touch any of my kids before I could wash. My thought it was a fruit snack. Thought it was a fruit snack. Shit hands.

Needless to say, my husband found it hilarious. Note to self, check the couch for any rolling turds. Love you guys and all your shit stories. Okay. First of all, if I don't even have a husband, but if I did and he changed a diaper on my couch and I found a rolling turd, I would be so fucking pissed. I'm disgusted. Can you imagine?

Oh, I'm disgusted. I'm like, how, ma'am, I need you to answer more questions for me because I'm like, okay, the consistency of an actual fucking turd would not be the same consistency of a fruit snack. Like what kind of fruit snacks are you eating because, no. And also is the natural reaction, like when you find something like that, not to immediately smell it. Where is that?

Just me. No, I can't. No, I don't smell things. I can't smell things. My nose is very sensitive. What do you mean? No. I don't smell things.

You saw this rolling thing around. You squish it between your fingers. I don't need to smell it to just, I'm like, I'm, I can't, no, I'm not smelling things. I'm not even looking at things because I will throw up. Wait, no, but I'm saying you see, let's just picture this goes to couch, sees what we think as a fruit snack. No, she didn't look at it. Roll it between our fingers.

No, I'm not rolling anything between my fucking fingers. And then the consistency is, no, can we be done? I can't, no, I, no, no, I'm thinking of the, the great value, um, smiley, that's what I was picturing. Me too. But then again, I'm like, okay, what type of fruit snacks are these because is your kids turd, like red, like what color they could have been purple turd. And then I'm like, okay, natural reaction.

You put that between your fingers and you're like, what is this, like, I'm not smelling it. No, I'm not smelling it. And then automatically you're going to know it's a turd. Like we don't need our husbands for those of us who don't have husbands to come and tell us that there's a rolling turd on the fucking sofa, get out of here, like, but everybody knows if you've had a baby, there are such things as rolling turds. No, I've never had one.

I've never experienced that one. It's a constipated child. I've had this before and Jackson's done this before and it's just like little nuggets, like in the diaper, it's just like little tiny shards or something, you know, just like pellets, like rabbit turds. Yeah, that's exactly what it looks like, rabbit turds. And that's what I imagine that this looks like. And I'm upset for her.

And I also was upset that she didn't wash her hands before she realized it was shit. Well, she didn't know. She thought it was a fruit snack. I know. But even if I was rolling a fruit snack and was unsure of what it was, I'm still washing my hands. So on that note, I hope that you guys all have a blessed, a fabulous weekend. No, they've already had their weekend.

I hope that this airs on Thursday. Have a blessed Friday and weekend, I guess. And if you guys have not followed us on at coffee combos podcast on Instagram, make sure you follow us over there. And if you have not subscribed to our show, you can do that on the purple podcast app, Spotify, podcast one, all that other shit. And I hope you guys have a great week and we'll talk to you soon. See ya.

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