Coffee Convos with Kail Lowry and Lindsie Chrisley - 85: Lindsie's Adoption Story, Sliding Into DMs, & YouTuber Domenick Flores

Episode Date: June 27, 2019

Kail & Lindsie talk to Youtuber Domenick Flores! Kail talks about the twitterverse & why she likes to meet other influencers Domenick shares how she found out she was adopted & how her mom used a Cabbage Patch Doll to explain the situation. She explains why she didn't want to find her biological mom until her adopted mom passed. Lindsie talks about being adopted as an adult & why it was hard. They talk to Domenick's biological brother Jamal about his adoption.

Hey guys, welcome to Coffee Combos, Lindsay, I feel like you're far away from me today. You do? Mm-hmm. I feel like I'm close. Okay. Okay. So June, it's still June, it's still Pride Month, and we're super excited because I have another friend of mine here on the podcast today.

Her name is Nick. Thank you. So welcome to Coffee Combos podcast. Thank you for having me, guys. I appreciate y'all. Yeah. How do you feel about being on Coffee Combos? Did you ever listen to us before?

You know, I listened to it when Kale put me on to it, and I started watching, and I am really excited to be here. One, not only because I developed a friendship with Kale, but I get to meet you and explain- So you really wanted to meet me? Yeah. Well, because she's been helping me put the Coffee Combos videos on my YouTube channel. I love it. Yeah.

So I've been like behind the scenes, and you didn't even know it. And I didn't even know it. Obviously, I needed to meet you. But obviously, I think that happens a lot. I think there's a lot of behind the scenes that I don't know about some stuff, and I like it to stay that way. Exactly. She's overwhelmed.

You're brain full. Yeah. Yeah, for sure. Kale gives me anxiety. Oh, so you need some of that CBD hair care? Yes. Because it needs to soak right into- For brain.

I do. I need something. Something more than what I'm doing now. Well, it is so nice to meet you. I'm so glad that you're on, and I'm so glad to be able to hear about your story. I'm excited to share it with you guys. So I think we met on Twitter, kind of, right? Again.

Yes, because I am part of the Twitterverse, like meeting new people and just like- I'm part of Twitter, too, but not in the same aspect as you are. Because I'm not meeting random people. I'm meeting other people, other influencers, YouTubers, people that do the same type of thing that we do, not like randoms. But I don't really- Also, I would probably be- Talk to anybody that does the same thing as we do.

You wouldn't? No. I mean, I'm not saying I wouldn't. I'm just saying I don't. Yeah. Kind of. Your friends with people that have done The Bachelor or The Bachelorette, your friends with people who have done Team Mom and other shows, so that's not necessarily true.

Yeah, I guess. But maybe you can meet them on Twitter. What about you on Twitter, kind of? True. See? See? It's not that weird. But I feel like it's just different.

I don't know. Because I just- Because Kale just talks to everybody. Yeah, I love it. And I don't. I feel- You know what I mean? I don't say everybody.

I'm kind of more low-key. But- Kale's a slide into the DM's, you know? Okay. But I did not slide it. Let's clarify. I did not slide into mixed DM's. I'm not saying that.

Because I'm also friends with her fiance, and that is not the case. I know. I'm not saying like that. I'm not saying in a sexual way. I'm just saying Kale is, like, in all aspects, a slide into your DM's. I don't think that I am that aggressive or ballsy. You know, you actually gave me motivation to slide into people's DMs. Not only because you respond to people's DMs, and I used to be like that.

Who does that? A social media person that does not respond. That's me. I started sliding into people's DMs, and that's actually how I got interviewed with Amanda Perez. Because the worst that they can say is no or not answer it. Exactly. The worst.

You know what I mean? So best case scenario, they're going to say yes. They're going to get the interview. You're going to get to, you know, network. So why not? Exactly. But what do you slide into DMs about? Like, well-

How does that start? Like, where do you even, like, go? For Nick? I mean, we just communicated on social media, and then when I met her in Dallas, the same time I met Reagan, we filmed a video for her YouTube channel. So it's kind of like cross-promoting each other's brands and like what we're doing. Yeah. So it worked.

That's so cool. So what did you guys film about? Oh, we interviewed Kale. Oh, you did? Yeah. You got to see that on YouTube. What was that like? Oh, that was different.

It was different. Yeah. It was like on the whim interview. So we were like crammed in this corner. Me and my friend actually shared a seat when we were interviewing, so it was kind of awkward, but we made it happen, though. Yeah, no, it worked. Kale can be an awkward person.

She says she's not. No, I am. She says she's not weird, but Kale is. She's definitely awkward because I just am weird like that. Yeah, 18 Pisces. We weird. Yeah. Oh, wait, you're Pisces, too?

Yeah. And I think her fiance is a Virgo. Oh, really? I'm a Virgo. Yeah, I am. So we vibing. Yeah. When's your fiance's birthday?

September 5th. Okay, I'm the 17th. 17th, okay. Yeah. Cool. Go, September. Go, Virgo. Shout out, fiance.

Hey. Shout out, fiance. So what we really wanted to talk to you about was the adoption story that I had came across on your Twitter. Yes. So Nick has this incredible adoption story that she put into a thread on her Twitter, and you can obviously plug your Twitter so people can go find it and read it. And I bawled my eyes out, and I don't really, before I even knew her, I think I read it,

right? Oh, yeah, probably, because it's pinned on my Twitter right now. Yeah. So I remember, I came across it before we met, and I cried, and I don't think I ever told you that, but it was just like, I felt... Kale's also a very emotional person. Picy. Sensitive.

Sensitive. Sensitive emotions. But I love her. So I really just wanted to give you another kind of platform to talk about it, and we don't really get to talk about adoption a whole lot on our podcast. I mean, we've touched on it here and there. But it's been requested. Yeah, it has.

So I definitely think that you should share your story. Yeah, for sure. Like, really, I started looking for my biological family only because I had a health scare. So, and it wasn't a big one. I had to have my appendix removed. But when I was going under the knife, the doctor was like asking me all these questions. Family history? Yeah, and I'm like, man, maybe I should know these things.

Like, I'm about to get cut open. But you knew you were adopted at this time. Yeah, I knew I was adopted. I found out probably around second grade. My parents told me, because I was getting bullied at school for not looking like them. Okay. Different ethnicity or what? Yeah.

My parents are both Hispanic. So, you know, I would be, you know, I'm mixed, half black, half Mexican, but, you know, in school, I was pretty, pretty dark as a kid. Sure. And they were like, those are your parents, those are your grandparents. And I was like, man, these are my parents. And I finally went home and I was letting them know that I was getting bullied. And they were like, well, you have the best of both worlds.

And it was kind of interesting the way my adopted mom introduced me to me being adopted is she bought a cabbage patch doll and you have to adopt them. They come with like a little birth certificate. Yeah. So, honey, I've been to Cabbage Patch Land. I know about it. I have a Cabbage Patch Land. There's a Cabbage Patch Land?

What? Yeah. I didn't know there was land in Cabbage Patch Land. I've probably got a used one as a kid. They have a general hospital for Cabbage Patch Babies. And I've been there. Okay. That's dope.

And I need to visit Cabbage Patch Land. You should, for sure. Like, hello. But, yeah. So, she explained that to me and I guess fast forward to today, you know, I had to have the surgery. Yeah, curious. And I made a video with the little cards, you know, you write on the sign and you don't

say anything. You just people read the cards. I knew that would go viral. And it did. I've seen this. Yeah. Yeah. So, it went viral and this lady reached out to me.

Her name is Jerry. And apparently she lost her son a long time ago to CPS and never got him back. And after she cleaned up her life and everything. She's still never got him back. Still never got him back. Doesn't know where he is. Stuff like that. So, it's a conversation called America's Taken and just kind of like exposing that industry

because it's kind of janky. And she's like, I help people reunite for a living and I would like to help you. And she reached out to some lady. I forgot her name. I wish I knew her name right now. But she reached out to her and she called her a search angel and she lived in Houston, Texas. She found my family within like five minutes.

Five minutes. Five minutes after sending me, sending the information, she was like, send me all that you know about yourself, about your biological family, like anything that can help me. Literally have chills. I know. I literally, yeah. Yeah. Would you buy a t-shirt for $50 if you knew it only cost $7 to make?

Because we wouldn't. And that's why we love Everlane. With Everlane, you never overpay for quality clothes. What's not to love about that? Everlane only makes premium essentials using the best materials without traditional markups. And they want you to know what you're paying for and why. So they'll tell you the real cost and they are radically transparent about every step of the process from the materials they use to the ethical factories that they work with.

Everlane's clothes look better, cost less, and last longer because Everlane sells directly to you. Their prices are 30% to 50% lower than traditional retailers. Essentials like their cotton crew t-shirt are exactly what they should be, simple, stylish, and made from quality materials. They have a 100% grade A cashmere, quality cotton basics, sustainable silks, premium Japanese denim made from the world's cleanest denim factory, Italian made leather shoes, outerwear made from recycled water bottles.

My favorite Everlane items are the denim skirts that I ordered. I wore one when Kale and I were in New York City a few weekends ago. Just super traditional. The denim's awesome. I have it in black as well. And I have now switched my wallet over to a travel wallet from Everlane and I am obsessed with it. So right now, you can check out our personalized collection at everlane.com slash coffee, plus

you'll get free shipping on your first order. That's everlane.com slash coffee, everlane.com slash coffee. Take us back for a second because when your mom came to you with the cabbage patch doll, what was your reaction to finding out that you were even adopted? Because I feel like as a child, that would be hard to process. That's such a tender age. What was the reaction like? What was that like?

My first reaction was like, I trusted everything my parents told me. We've always been open and my reaction was just like, okay, so what do I tell these kids at school basically? Oh, wow. So you were not like upset or anything like that? No, I was too young to be upset. So they were like, my mom was like, tell them you have the best of both worlds. And that's what I went to school telling people.

I was just like, man, I got the best of both worlds and you don't be like, so it didn't really faze me. And I think it's because I was so young and not not young like a teenager, you know, right? That's like a time where it might be a little bit harder and unpredictable about how they're going to react. Exactly. So like it was divine timing, I guess.

Do you have other siblings that are also adopted into your family or do your family? Does your parents have biological children? No. My family could not have kids and that's why I was adopted and ours was a closed adoption. My mom, my biological mother was 18 at the time and she could not like raise me like under her circumstances. And so I went up for adoption and they actually worked at Walmart together and they linked up and it was a closed adoption.

Oh wait. So they knew each other. So why didn't your mom help you find your biological mom? She was going to. I just was never interested because I had such a good family. I didn't. I wasn't missing anything. Sure.

You know, so I just kind of went on about my life and I cared so much about my adopted mom. I didn't want to do anything to hurt her, you know, and she ended up passing away and I felt a little more comfortable to do it. You know, had she been alive, I don't know if the situation would still been the same. Sure. But she ended up passing away and still I didn't look for them. But when I went to the hospital, I was like, man, I should probably know just for my own

well-being. Right. Right. You know, and yeah, so. So you didn't find your biological mom until your adoptive mom passed? Yeah, I didn't. I could understand that. Why you would, it's almost like a respect thing.

Yeah. It was, it was a respect thing like, I, she, we talked about it. We had those conversations all the time. She told me her name. I knew her name for a long time. And, you know, I wasn't for sure because time was going on and then she had passed away. So I couldn't ask any more questions, but before she passed away, she was like, if you need to find your biological mom, go to your aunt, she knows more info.

Go to this person. They know info and stuff like that. But she was like, at any point, if you want to find them, I will help you. So she set you up for success. What was your dad's role in all of this because he's still, was he still alive at the time? Yeah, my dad's still alive and he is so supportive. Like he's so dope. He did, did whatever my mom said, like my mom was a boss, I think.

So my dad is just like backdooring her like, yeah, if you need help, I'll help you. Obviously he was more protective. So it's crazy cause my adopt, my biological mother used to come and visit me up until like the, well, at least the first year, and then my dad kind of cut her off like, hey, we need to raise her by ourselves now, you know, so it can't come around anymore. And then we ended up moving to Corpus Christi, Texas for a little while and then coming back to Dallas. So what was, was there any type of change in relationship between you and your dad at

all once you did finally meet your biological mom? Um, no, it wasn't. And I was nervous about that, but I was like, dad, I need you here. Like I was real adamant on him being a partner with me and finding this, like, like, we're doing this together. That's your family. That's what you know. Exactly.

And I was like, nothing's going to change the fact that you're my dad, you know, like, um, that, that's not going to change anything. You are my dad. You are my parent. You're the person who raised me. So I need you with me, you know, and he's like, I'm, I'm there with you. So okay. Wow.

That's like so much to take in at one time, but I know. So has your adoptive, no, let me not say that word because he's raised you. Your dad, has he reconnected with your biological mom then since you have? Or you kind of, they keep everything separate. Yeah. They've had, we've had dinner together more than once. Uh, I celebrated my 30th birthday with both of them. Um, he's been to my mom's house.

Uh, so it's, it's really, he's around, you know, he ain't going nowhere. He's still my dad and they link up just like normal people. I mean, my dad is old enough to be my mom's dad. Oh wow. Yeah. My mom's 50 and my dad's already 72. So yeah. So there's a big age difference and my dad is just like, I just want you to have a nice

life. He's so happy that I found my brothers. He's like, like that was his main concern. I was brought up as the only child and then him leaving this earth and not having anyone. So your mom had, your biological mom had other children. Yeah. So my biological mom had two other kids and we're all from the same mom, same dad. Two of us went up for adoption.

Why? Um, she, okay. So my biological father was older than she was and she told me that she was just like really naive when she got pregnant. And uh, so I went up for adoption first. I was the oldest and then she ended up keeping our middle brother and, um, you know, I was kind of curious about that. So I asked my mom, like, why'd you keep the middle one?

You know, and she said that our father convinced her that he was going to be around for her. You know, like, I'm going to help you raise this child, don't give it up for adoption. So pretty much he is the reason why she kept him and, uh, she got pregnant again. And at that time she was pregnant and so was like the next door neighbor or something. And it was like bad and she was like, man, I'm not doing this again with him. And I'm finally going to leave your father at this point. Okay. So in a nutshell, it's more like, okay, so they were together, probably not healthy,

young. Yep. They got pregnant again, got pregnant again, thinking that it's going to get better. I feel like as a lot of unhealthy relationships go, I mean, I've been in one just like that where you think that they're going to change. They show you some sight, some type of change. You realize it's not changing, but now you've already had this child get pregnant again. And it's like, okay, we're not doing this again.

Right. Okay. So that can, you know, make some type of sense. Let's take a minute to talk about getting a bargain. Who doesn't love a deal? And thanks to Poshmark, you can get awesome clothes for amazing prices. Here's the scoop. Poshmark is an app you can download where you can buy gently used or even new with tech

items that people are selling for a fraction of the retail price. Plus, you can list the items from your own closet that you no longer want or need to make money. I personally have started a Poshmark account, haven't loaded anything on it yet, but I have so many clothes that I've worn maybe one time taken photos in them. And now people probably don't want to see me in them or I don't want to see myself in them. So look out for me this summer because I promise I'm going to be like having a little Poshmark

shop for you guys to shop. Even I'm thinking about listing some of my stuff so that you guys can grab those. Shopping on Poshmark is amazing because they have a ton of cool items and all the brands that youth can think of like Nike, Abercrombie, J Crew and designer brands like Louis Vuitton. And today, if you download the Poshmark app and use our invite code, coffee combos, you'll get $5 off your first purchase. And invite code, coffee combos when you sign up. Invite code, coffee combos.

Do you feel resentment in any way for her keeping your brother and not you and your other brother? You know, a lot of people ask me that, but I think I'm so content. Like I was so happy like where I was that there's no hard feelings. You know, I'm glad if you didn't feel like you were up for it, I'm so glad you gave me the parents that I had because they were phenomenal. You know, I had everything I wanted. I mean, not everything, but you know, for the most part, I was a happy kid. So I wasn't, there wasn't a lack there of at all.

When I found out she kept my middle brother, I was just like, man, I can't believe like how he would have been brought up to know that he had siblings because my mom told him everything basically. And so he was alone. So that he was brought up as an only child as well. Was your youngest brother who was put up for adoption? Yeah. All of y'all were grown up, grew up as only children.

Yeah. All of us. That's so wild. Yeah. It's pretty wild. And one crazy thing is the other one that went up for adoption, they called my family. My family couldn't afford him and didn't end up taking him in. Oh, wow.

And I didn't know that that happened. That was probably heartbreaking for your parents too because they probably would have loved to. Absolutely. If they could have. Yeah. I was talking to my dad this morning, actually, and I told him, I was like, wouldn't it been so cool to have raised both of us, and he was like, man, I wish I had the money at the

time. I didn't think I could do it. He's like, I really regret that. So because they, your moms knew each other, was there a ton of like fees involved and all like, you know how in adoption today, I mean, you could spend over 50 grand to adopt to adopt a child. Was it the same then? Is that what the money situation was?

Or you're not really sure? I don't, I'm not sure, but I doubt it because it was 89. So I don't, I don't think the fees were the same. Like I got all my adoption paperwork and I know they had to go through a lawyer and stuff, but it was a closed adoption. So I didn't go through like foster or anything like that. Literally the day I was born, I was handed off to my family. Okay.

Okay. Yeah. That's similar to, I mean, you're familiar with Teen Mom. One of the girls on Teen Mom OG gave her daughter up for adoption the day that she was born. I think they were. But see, I feel like that's the way to do it in the responsible, the responsible way, you know, because it's like you're setting that child up for success and it's not getting so many emotions.

Right. I mean, it's emotional, but like not getting all the emotions involved of like becoming attached to the child and then having to, you know, have them move environment. Yeah. Well, there was a, there was a girl on 16 and pregnant. I don't remember her name, Ashley, I think she had her aunt or her cousin adopt her baby, but like went back and forth and like brought the baby home and then like decided she want to keep her and then changed her mind like a couple of weeks later and then like went

back and forth. And now I think, I don't know if it's the aunt or the cousin or someone in the family raises the daughter and then she went on to have more kids later on. I think that when you get pregnant and the choice is adoption, I think you have to make an adult decision of it's not about your feelings anymore. It's about what's the most healthy thing for the child and not, you know, can I live with this? Can I not and go back and forth because that's not healthy for you or the baby, you know?

So I don't, I don't know, but I was adopted as an adult. And so lots of emotions went into that for me only because I know my biological mother and I lived with my dad growing up and his wife. And I feel like looking back on it, doing it, I feel like my parents had such a bad relationship that neither of them liked each other. And so I felt like a product of my mother and living under the same roof as my dad, his current wife and other children that I always felt like a sense of I didn't fit there. And because of the hostility between my parents, I felt like maybe the way to end all of that

would be just to get adopted. And then that would fix all of the problems and it never fixed the problems because I felt like it was too far. And I've talked so much about it to other friends that if you're going to go through an adoptive situation and make it the type of situation that you've had that ideally you do that from birth and you don't have that relationship with the other parent because then you're always going to go back to what you know, you know, like just going to go back to what you know.

And biologically, I don't know why, but I feel like so many people that are in adoptive situations, even though they have a great life, they still want to know more. Right. Because it's like where they came from. Absolutely. I wasn't adopted, but I didn't know my dad. So my whole life I spent time wondering like, what was it like? Who is he?

What is he? Where do we come from? Right. Met him one time and then I was like, well, that didn't really work out. But I still even now like want to know. So it's like the mystery, but what is the relationship like with your mom now? Because I know that she was going to be here today, but it didn't work out. Yeah.

Our relationship is pretty cool. Like we are very much alike. I didn't know that DNA was going to happen. That's what I was going to ask, like that it is insane how much alike we are. And I see where I get a lot of my personality traits from like the she's, she's actually a very successful person. She dedicated her whole life to be successful in case we came back. So like, yeah, like she's like, I did all that I could just to make sure that when y'all

found me, y'all wouldn't find me like bummy or anything like that. Right. Like she really took the time to get her whole life together. Yeah. She like really got it together. What is the relationship now between her and your biological father? They're not together. They're cordial.

My biological father is kind of a rolling stone. He's still not settled down. I've met him already and I could tell that he's just not a family guy. Like Peter Payne. Yeah. He's just not a thing. So did he help raise your brother that she raised or was he kind of like in and out? What, what he was kind of in and out and that's where what kind of sucks for my, my younger

brother is that he was in and out of his life, I think until six and then just kind of ghosted. You know, Oh, wow. See that's hard because then you look at the situation as a whole and you're like, okay, you went to a functional family that you didn't have that in and out. And then the younger, did he go to a functional family that didn't have the in and out? Yeah. Same.

Like you have the middle child that had to deal with, you know, the in and out and not the stability. That's already hard enough as a middle child, I'm sure. Yeah. From what I've, what I've heard. From what I've heard. I was raised as an only child too. So yeah, that's, that's really crazy.

Have you guys ever wondered how your friend on social media can afford that fancy vacation or how your best friend can get that fancy leather bag? It's probably credit cards if we're being honest. And Lending Club wants to help people deal with the crazy credit card bills. It's a leading platform you can use to consolidate your credit cards and pay off the debt in one fixed monthly payment. It's super simple. Just go to lendingclub.com and tell them about yourself, how much you want to borrow, pick

the terms that are right for you. And if you're approved, your loan is automatically deposited into your bank account and as little as a few days. Since 2007, Lending Club has helped millions of people regain control of their finances with no trips to the bank and no high interest credit cards. But a lot of you know how frustrating credit card debt can be. So it's empowering to be able to do something about it. Lending Club is the number one peer to peer lending platform with over $35 billion in

loans issued. Go to lendingclub.com slash combos, check your rate in minutes and borrow up to $40,000. That's lendingclub.com slash combos. Lendingclub.com slash combos, all loans made by Web Bank member FDIC equal housing lender. So when you went into meeting her, did she kind of already know that you were popular on social media and had your own YouTube channel and did you talk to her about kind of telling your story? She didn't know at all.

She saw the video because the girl who found me on Facebook, Jerry, who reached out to the search angel, she acted as a communicator between me and my biological family in case something went wrong. So like in case they were like, no, we don't want to meet her, you know, she would tell me and said them. So she didn't know. She saw the video. She knew that the video went viral, but she didn't know that I was doing my thing like

on YouTube. Right. Right. So it's kind of a new life for her and she's fully supportive of it. She's actually really proud of everything that I've accomplished. But yeah, it's all it's all new to her. So she's kind of timid. I was going to say, would you film with her or no?

Yeah, she wants to do a Q&A on my channel. So she's down. She's down for everything like she's super down. Like really she wants to like, I feel like she wants to just dedicate the rest of her life to getting to know us because she's missed out so much. And yeah, it's just really wild. Our relationship really good. Matter of fact, she lives with me right now.

Oh, yeah. She's kind of, she hasn't aired it out or anything like that, but she's in a rough patch in her marriage. And, you know, luckily I just got a house last year. So like the timing was so divine, I can actually offer a room to my mom. I'm like, Hey, just come chill here, you know. How did you get in contact then with your brother? Because we do have Jamal here and we'll talk to him in a little bit.

But how did you get in contact with him? Did you get in contact with your mom first? How did that work? And were they interested in meeting as well? Yeah, so I didn't know that I had siblings when I did the search and I was hoping that I did, you know, and come to find out there, the search angel was like, Hey, you got more than one sibling. Well, because my mom was married.

So my mom had step kids and she was like, your, your family is like Puerto Rican. She wasn't too sure, you know, and come to find out there were step sisters that I had. And then I had two brothers that were biological. And I didn't know about Lance, who's the middle one. But I found out when the search angels told me, yeah, you have siblings. And I was like, Oh man, I need to find them then. Yeah. You know, they got to know about me like on their on their sister.

So I found them, met mom and Lance and had had dinner with Lance first before I met mom. And what was his reaction when he met me? Man, it was, it was just like, we looked at each other in the eyes, like all night long, we were just like, Oh my God, you look like me. You know, like, it was ever like an awkward moment or it was just like catching up on everything. Yeah. It was just catching up on everything.

Like, so whenever we met, we met outside first. We were supposed to meet inside, but we actually got out of our cars at the same time and we were like, Oh my God. And I was like, Oh my God. And he was like, give me your hands, give me your hands. And he just put my hands and he was just like, he's so affectionate is he's just like, grab me. He's just like, man.

Oh my God. I'm so happy to hear like, it was just the best thing ever. No question. Did he know about you growing? Like, did he know that your mom had a child before him and after he knew about both of us? What's the age difference? We're all two years apart.

So I'm the oldest and then Jamal is four years apart and then Lance is two years apart from me. Okay. Wow. Yeah. So and so he knew, but he didn't know like where y'all were or anything. Yeah. He didn't know our last names, anything like that.

So he told me, I wasn't going to look for y'all till I graduated college. I didn't want to look stupid. Oh. He's like, I didn't want to be a broke college student, but I kind of came into his life before then he's still broke college student. Do you guys still have a good relationship today? Yes. We talk all the time.

I mean, you guys hang out. We hang out. I went to see him at his college. We try to get together as much as possible. He borrows money from me and doesn't pay me back. He's just like, oh, normal. Normal sibling. Yeah.

That's awesome. Does he have kids? Like do you have nieces and nephews yet? Not yet. And I feel like I'm going to be before them. That's okay. You're one of the oldest. So that's fine.

It works out. I mean, I'm hoping they go first. But you know, is there a huge difference and we can ask Jamal too, but is there a huge difference in adoption story for you and for him? Big time. Oh, wow. I can't wait to hear. Yeah.

So I mean, I go ahead and say it, but Jamal could tell you the story, but Jamal didn't even know that he was adopted. You said when the search angel, was it called the search angel? Yeah. When the search angel reached out to Jamal, that's when he found out that he was adopted. Yeah. And it kind of spiraled from there. Yeah.

It threw him for a loop. He was just like, he was more like, like, are you sure you have the right person? Like he probably even gave her a little attitude back, you know, like quit messing with me basically. You know, and yeah, so he had no earthly idea that he was adopted. I kind of felt bad and selfish at the same time, like, but at the same time, his response was pretty phenomenal. So I think y'all will enjoy hearing that story from Jamal.

Okay. Well, before we get him on, I just wanted to ask one question. Would you have rather been in his position and found out that way or found out when you found out from your parents? That's a good question, Lunti. I think I was better off finding out early on. I really commend and look up to my brother for the way he responded to that. You know, like not everyone will respond that way and that level of maturity is something

to admire. Okay. Well, on that note, let's get Jamal on the podcast. Hey, Jamal. Thank you for coming on Coffee Combo. So what's up? So you've been sitting here listening to the whole interview. So you kind of got the introduction.

We would love to hear, you know, kind of your reaction and what you went through when you found out that you were adopted. Okay. Um, so basically, I think it was January 7th, I believe it was a Saturday. I was actually at the gym and I got a message on Facebook and I'm jamming out to my music and I'm getting like ding, ding, ding on my phone. I'm like, okay, what's going on? So I go ahead and check my Facebook and, um, this is Lady Jerry, um, and she's sending

me messages and she's like, um, will I have some information about your half siblings come to find out they're not half, they're full, full siblings. Um, but yeah, she was like, oh, I got some information. I'm just like, no, I can't believe this, you know, I'm kind of like, um, nah, you're joking with me. This is spam, you know, something. Um, I think it got to a point where, um, I kind of was asking her questions that were personal about me to see if she knew the answer to those questions that I'm asking her.

Yeah. So I'm like, okay, if you know this information, then you should be able to answer these questions for me. So I kind of was just asking her some questions and at one point she sent me a copy of my birth certificate and it was kind of, kind of like, whoa, okay, you know, like not too many people have that information. So it's like, how do you get that? Like I don't think that's personal.

Like what is it called? Public knowledge. Public record. Public record. Like she told me where I was adopted from and like it was just like, whoa, and then she sent me pictures of everybody. It was just, and then I was still kind of like, oh, nah, man, this is, this is BS. But then she was like, then she said something that was like, like, like kind of unprofessional

like, and she was like, no, like this is for real. Like you need to believe me, like, but not like that, but you know, that's how she was saying it. Like, yeah, this is real. So what was going through your head at that point? Did you immediately go home to your family and be like, what is this? Or were you kind of just like thinking about it and, you know, processing it before you ask any type of questions?

So it was more of a process. Like I really didn't go home and talk about it at all. You were trying to process it yourself. Yeah. Processing myself. So it took me about maybe like a good two weeks before I even, before I even brought it up to my parents, you know what I'm saying? Were you still in contact with Jerry for those two weeks or how, what was that like?

Actually, no, after me and Jerry were done contacting each other, I think after the day that she told me that same day we were done pretty much done contacting and she, we exchanged information, I guess she was like the middle man and I was kind of like sending her my information to my sister and then she sent her information to me. And then I had a conversation with Celeste from there and then I'm Celeste. I'm Celeste. That's my, that's my first name. Really?

What's your middle? Dominic, Dominic's my middle name. Oh. I go by Nick. It fits me. So wait. Back up. So before the Facebook messages, I want to know, do you look like your adoptive parents?

Like what? Okay. So growing up, I mean, a lot of people thought that I looked like my mom, my adopted mom. But you know, I was telling Nick, you know, I kind of, when I was a kid, you know, I never saw pictures of me, you know, when I was first born or my adopted mom being pregnant or anything like that. So I kind of never. Right.

That, that piece was missing. Yeah. That piece was missing. So did your biological mom put you up for adoption the same way that Nick was put up for adoption? Or was this like, they brought you home and then? Nah, I believe it was pretty much the same. Pretty much the same.

Okay. So after you process this kind of for two weeks. That's like traumatic. Did you approach your, and is it adoptive parents you have to mom and dad? Did you kind of approach them and say, you know, what's, what's going on? Okay. Yeah. The first person I approached was really my dad because my dad is like a straightforward

person and he's not like very, very emotional. He can get emotional, but not very emotional. So I kind of went to him first, you know, as a father, you know, his goal is to protect me as much as he can. Sure. So when I went to him, first thing, I mean, I didn't even know how to tell him myself and I kind of, I broke down in tears and he was like, he was like, are you okay? Are you in trouble?

Did something happen? And I'm like, no, no. And I just kind of told him, like, this is the information that I got, you know, and I just kind of laid everything on the table. And then from there, he just basically started telling me the reasons why, you know, he didn't tell me and stuff like that. And what were those to you mind sharing? So basically, basically he felt as if, you know, when I was younger that I wasn't mature

enough yet, in, you know, in a sense to him, or in another sense, he kind of didn't, he didn't, he didn't know how to tell me either, you know, right? Because I mean, at that point, it's been so long and you're comfortable, you guys are all comfortable in your relationships and your family. So at that point, how do you tell somebody? Right. And then they have kids that do rebel from their parents, you know, like, oh, I'm adopted. Oh, you're not my parents anyway.

Right. I don't want to deal with you guys anymore. You know, like, so yeah, I can, I can see that. I can see that being a good reason to not tell me. So then did you guys then go to your mom and say that you knew? So so basically, after I had a talk with my dad, my dad went to my mom and saw mom. So they had a conversation. I really don't know what their conversation was, but once we talk, once I talk to my

mom, it was pretty much the same thing that me and my dad talked about. It was pretty much the same. Okay, people, who's joining me on this fitness journey? Because it better be everyone. I don't want to be doing this by myself. Yes. Join us by using OpenFit, which is basically the Netflix of workout videos because they have something for everyone and you can do it from a tablet, phone, computer, wherever.

They have celebrity trainers, programs like extend bar where you can get a bar workout without an expensive membership and tons of equipment. OpenFit gets that everybody is different. So they have custom tailored original content. I personally don't do yoga, but I feel like it's something that I should get more into. I need something that's slow paced and I have major anxiety. So I think that's something that would really help me and slow me down. OpenFit has changed the way we work out and with our code coffee, you can join us on a

fitness journey personalized just for you. Again, use our code coffee and start using OpenFit for your journey to a healthier life. Right now, during the OpenFit 30 day challenge, our listeners will get a special extended 30 day free trial membership to OpenFit where you can lose up to 15 pounds and 30 days when you text coffee to 30, 30, 30. You'll get full access to OpenFit, all the workouts and nutrition information totally free. Again, just text coffee to 30, 30, 30.

Was there a resentment for you towards Sherry or Nick in how you found out? Did you feel any type of resentment or like, I guess, anger? No. Or towards your parents at all? I would say with my parents not anger, maybe a little overwhelmed, well, I was overwhelmed with Sherry and with my parents, it was more so like just disappointed a little bit. Sure. You know, and I mean, but there's a bunch of different emotions running through my head

at that point. I feel like... How do you process that? Yeah, it's a lot to process. The situation with Sherry is a little weird to me just from an outsider's perspective because in one, it's almost like a catch-22, right, because on one hand, she's helping Nick who wants to find her family and her biological siblings, but on the other hand, she has no idea if she's about to ruin another family's whole functionality in life.

So I feel like she was kind of in a position where maybe she could have approached it a little bit differently, like maybe reached out to your parents and said, you know, this is the situation at hand. How do you know he's adopted, do you want him to... Can I reach out? You know what I mean? Instead of being so abrasive because I feel like, you know, I found out that, you know, my mom's husband at the time wasn't my dad, you know, when I was like 12, and the way

that I found out was very abrasive like that. So it's like, I mean, I guess I knew that he wasn't my dad, but like them saying it, you know, it was a little bit different. So it was just like, you don't really, you're not, you don't even have the right to tell me that. Well, and then the next question I feel like, have you asked your parents if Jerry would have never reached out? Would they have ever told you?

Okay. So basically they, their plan was to just tell me, I guess whenever I got married. But in a sense to me, yes, I guess too late. Yeah. That's a long time. Yeah. That's too late for me. That's a long time.

So I'm pretty happy that I found out the way I did. I feel like kids are very resilient. And I have no place to really put judgment on this, but I, I do feel like just listening to both of y'all stories, like to find out as a younger child, you don't feel like you're living a lie or that you're missing something and you have your whole life and you understand, you learn to understand it as you go where, you know, as an adult, you're an adult, right? You're already who you are, you think you are who you are, you know what I mean? So I feel like it would be harder to come to terms with as an adult.

Yeah. Yeah. That's why I really commend the way he did. He handled it because I don't know how I would have responded, you know. Did you want to meet your mom right away or was that something that you were kind of apprehensive about? No, I wanted to meet her. You did?

Yeah. Yeah. I think it's like, just like natural instinct. I mean, just like parents, like have a, like a mother has maternal instinct. And I think it's like kids have like a natural instinct to like want to know, especially their mother. Yeah. Well, so I asked Nick if she had any resentment towards y'all's mom, your biological mom,

for giving you guys up for adoption. Did you feel resentment or did you feel any type of? No, I didn't, I didn't have any resentment for my mom at all. It was, it was, it was, it was emotional, but I didn't really have any resentment towards her. I mean, like Nick, I, I had a great life, you know what I'm saying? I was only child as well. So I got pretty much everything I wanted as a kid growing up.

So I mean, I can't really, I'm not upset with her. You know, I'm just, I'm just happy that I'm able to be here to, you know, to, I guess, bring joy to her life. You know what I'm saying? Make it better for her. How did your family, your parents feel about you meeting her? Okay, so my, my dad was really excited about it actually. My dad, he's very positive about it.

My mom, my mom, she was a little bit emotional about it. You know, she was a little, she was a little upset, like, why did your sister have to find you like that? And why did they find you on, you know, but, but she eventually got over that, you know, it just took, it just took time. In her, in Nick's defense, I mean, she didn't have Jerry reach out to you in that way, right? It was just kind of the way it all kind of fell together. Right.

Right. It didn't happen that way at all. You know, she was just emotionally, emotionally upset, you know, and just doesn't want to lose her son. Of course. Yeah. I mean, I could understand being like, I'm not an adoptive mom, but if I was, I could understand like you've raised this baby.

Like this is your baby. This is your baby and, and you've raised them and don't want somebody to come in and like change everything, change everything and like make claim on something that you deem as your child, right? You know, and that would be hard. And especially you can't deny a biological bond, you know, I mean, there's just something, I don't know if you had it with your mom whenever you first saw her or if you did, but I just think that a lot of people have that natural.

Yeah, I would say that. Do you have a relationship with Lance, your other brother? Oh yeah, most definitely. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Okay. That's so crazy.

This is like literally the best case scenario of an adoption of an adoptive story. Like I don't think I've ever heard like such a like happy cohesive story when it comes to adoption. I feel like you always hear horror stories and it kind of puts a stigma on it and it's like, oh, you gave your baby away because, you know, you suck and that's just not the case ever. Yeah. And it really just worked out for everybody involved.

So could your parents not have kids either? Yeah, they couldn't have kids. We talk about that infertility, secondary infertility all the time on our podcast. And so, and we talked to Reagan about her fertility journey and stuff like that. So I feel like it's good to talk about, you know, the couples who can't have kids and get to adopt. And we get a lot of requests for that. So I'm, I'm just like blown away by the story.

I literally sobbed when I read it on Twitter. I was like, this is not real. Well, so did either of you, I mean, when you met your mom, like, what was that? Were you guys together when you met her? No. You met her on separate occasions and was Lance there or it was also separate? Lance was there both times. So you met them both at once.

Like you met Lance and your mom and then you met Lance and your mom. Well, I met Lance the day before I met my mom. So he wanted to meet me first that way, you know, make sure I'm not crazy. So we met, we met in Deep Ellum and Dallas and he was with his girlfriend and we linked and that's, he had pictures of me. He's like, just so you know, he's your baby pictures, you know, and yeah, she had a whole box of our items, like put in the attic and stuff and she pulled down what she could find. Um, so I met with Lance and he was like, Hey, there's another one of us, you know, and I

was like, what? He was like, yeah, we, there's another one. So you met Lance before you found out you had Jamal. Yeah. Before I even knew Jamal exists. I thought it was just me and Lance and uh, so what was your reaction then I was like, can we find him? That was the first question.

I was like, can we find him? Do y'all know where he is? What's his name? And he was like, we don't have anything. So your adoptive parents gave you guys your names? Yeah. Right. Yeah.

And it was clothes. So obviously they wouldn't, Lance wouldn't have known or your mom wouldn't even have known. Um, so did your mom pick the families? She, I believe so. My mom, I mean, she kind of landed in her lap, you know, and yours, right, but yours maybe not. No, I don't think so.

I don't think. His was a little different. He, he was at a church for a few days before he got adopted, but he went through the church so it was a little different. That's so clear. That literally breaks my heart. I know. I literally was tearing up when she went before we introduced Jamal because it was like, I

don't even know how you guys didn't just ball your way through this whole process. Oh man, we shed our tears. When I think about like the first moment that I heard Jamal's voice on the phone and me having to tell him like I cried. Okay. She did. Yeah. But does that look like, because I know that I've heard that before that, you know, kids

go to like churches and stuff before they find, you know, a suitable family for them to go to. So like, what does that look like? Are they with a church family or did your mom just like take him to church? Like, you know, they do like that drop off thing. Was it like that type of situation? No, it was a set up thingy, like thingy. It was a, she went to the church and they already had families ready for adopting.

That wanting to adopt. Yeah. And so, mom will go visit Jamal and I think it was like maybe a week that he was there. It was like an orphanage, I think, something like an orphanage with kids. But he was already... Of all ages or just infants? I'm not sure. I'm not sure.

Yeah, I'm not sure. But it was definitely like an orphanage kind of thing. Yeah. And it was literally like nine days, mom will go visit him back and forth until he got adopted. So that's how he has baby pictures of our mom. Who picked the family then? I believe the church does it at that point, yeah, like mom, even my family kind of landed in our mom's lap.

So it's not like she picked them, but they kind of found her. But not really. They kind of, right, right. So, yeah, with Jamal, it was a little different, but I guess she felt a little more comfortable because it went through a church, you know, and she was going to get her peace of mind. Yeah. Yeah. What a crazy story.

So wait, did you guys grow up in similar areas or no, no, I wouldn't say that. Where did you grow up? So I grew up in Southwest Houston. Okay. And where did you grow up? I grew up in Dallas. So I lived in the suburbs in Irving, Irving, Texas. And then your brother lands?

Ulyss. Ulyss. So when I found them, they were like, what's the gradient? Oh, five minutes. Five minutes. Wow. They were like five minutes away from my mom's house for the last five years. And I was like five hours away.

Do you? Oh. So wait, your parents, they weren't members of the church. The church just, I guess, had like a list of... Like an affiliation? Yeah. Maybe like an affiliation where they were looking for... Yeah.

Probably. So it was in the 90s, so I'm assuming that... Yeah, I'm just trying to figure out, like... They were all different then, but yeah, Jamal, that church, I don't... My mom didn't go to that church, you know, like it was just probably the hospital connected her with that. You know? I'm not sure.

That's something we'd have to ask mom. So did... I'm assuming your parents drove from Houston to get you and told you that? Right. They got a phone call from the church, I think. I think it was more like from them, from what I know, it was like they had like to do a little application, you know, and it took time, like it was a process behind it, and I guess the church called them, and so that's when they came to pick me up.

Okay. So we know that Nick's dad has like had dinner and stuff with your biological mom. Have your parents been as involved in that side of the process, or is it basically just like you building your relationship with her on your own? Right now, I guess it's me building my relationship with her alone. My dad, my dad definitely wants to meet me, my mom, of course. He's met Celeste, so that's a good thing. My mom, she's kind of standoffish still, you know, but that takes time, you know.

That takes time. She just has to get used to... And she'll come around? Yeah, yeah. She'll definitely come around. I think now she's in a better place, and she kind of wants to meet everybody now, because every time Nick has came out to Houston, she was like, oh, why didn't you tell me your sister was here?

You know, you know, I wanted to meet her, I could have cooked, you know, stuff like that. So I think everything is... You've got to think about, like, all the emotions that are involved in the whole process, like you have emotions as the child that was adopted, you know, and still have a mother, a biological mother that's living, and then you've got the mother that raised you, that I'm sure she feels like a piece of her is like missing now, you know, because what she thought was going to be closed is now open, you know. I don't know if they should really do closed adoption at this point, because what if the

child, in a sense of, like, the child turning 18 and wanting to find their parents, they should have that right if they want to. But when it's closed and it doesn't leave them any, like, information to the child, that's not necessarily fair. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. Where... I feel like when the child is an adult, they should be able to make the decision, you

know, and have access to know what they were birthed from, you know. Like giving away all your rights. Because, or, I mean, do they not leave, like, their health history with the adoptive parents for, you know what I mean? Yeah. I think they do, though. Yeah, I think they do. Or you just didn't have access to it.

I just didn't know, because my mom was the person that, or my adopted mom was the person that I would go to for stuff like that, and my dad is, like, just there for moral support, you know. So, I needed my adopted mom to tell me those things, and I didn't know, because she had a gun. But afterwards, my dad gave me a big old box of, like, all my adoption stuff. Oh, okay. Okay.

And I found, like, old looking adoption paper where it had my actual last name before it changed and everything. Oh, wow. Yeah. Wow. Like, my last name was Jimenez, and, yeah, everything is crazy. Now it's not. No.

That's it. It's Flores now. Are you adopted? Yeah. You said you're Mexican, and? And Black. So, our father is actually Jamaican. Our grandfather is.

So, are your adopted parents Mexican? Yes. Okay. So, I got taught Spanish. And what about your parents? Yeah, they're African-American. Yeah. Yeah.

He didn't even know he was half-Mexican. I mean, I got clowned in school, you know. You did? Yeah. He was like, oh, you got mixed hair. Mixed people hair. You know? You might be Indian.

You might be Mexican. My son is Black and Mexican, and he's got long, black hair. Like, but it's like mine, but black. Yeah. Yeah. Hey, it's a hit or miss on the hair, man. I got screwed. Right.

You have nice hair. Stop it. Man, I got screwed. I see Black and Mexican kids with, like, luscious curls and stuff, and I'm like, boy, if I had that hair. My son's hair is stick-straight. Stick-straight. So, wait.

Does Lance look more like you or more like you? Yeah. Right in the middle. Yeah. I feel like he looks like me, how I look when I was a baby. Like the birth order. Right in the middle. He looks like me as a baby, too.

Yeah. So, I don't know. Because when you put us all together, people are like, dang, y'all look alike. And I have people that are like, you and Lance look just alike, and then I have people that are like, you and Jamal look just alike, so. It's so crazy to me that you guys all have the same exact parents. I know. That's what was crazy.

It was one of the weirdest parts to like here, because I feel like if it was, you all had different dads, or it was a little more dysfunctional, I would be like, okay, like I could see, but like, you don't really have the same parents. But it seems like a very dysfunctional. Yeah. You know what I mean? Like, a functionally dysfunctional. Yes.

Right here. Which is so weird. But like I said, it's like the perfect adoption story, because everything worked out. Yeah. I literally asked mom when I found out about Jamal, I was like, can we look for him? And she was like, I don't know. I don't know. I can give you his day to birth, you know, but his family, because I guess a long time

ago, mom, it used to be like, mom was allowed to reach out and stuff. For you? For myself and for your parents, let your biological mom reach out for a little while. Yeah. She used to send letters to my, to my mom, my adopted mom. So is that considered a closed adoption? Or not really? I'm not sure.

You're not sure? But I know she used to send letters, and then I guess my mom was like, yeah, you can't, yeah, stop sending her. And send it from my family to like, all right, it's time for you to go. I mean, at least you have, you know that your mom did it all out of a good place. It wasn't coming from anything other than wanting the best for y'all. You know what I mean? Do y'all call her mom?

Yeah. Yeah. Most definitely. That's so crazy. Yeah. And it's crazy because our mom is super conservative. So like, I, you know, I'm out and gay and I was going to ask you about that, but I didn't know how, I didn't know if we were going to go down the clouds again.

And what was her reaction to that? She was like, you know, I may not condone it, but I'm going to love you unconditionally. I don't care like what it is, you know. So I feel like me and Jamal coming into her life has opened up new doors in her mind, you know, like just to how to unconditionally love people and, you know, just get out of that, you know, I want, I don't want to offend nobody, but religious minds, you know, kind of sucks you in and she lives her life fully for God, which I'm proud of that, you know. But also accepting you exactly like kind of helping her understand that, you know, things

are okay. You know what I'm saying? Has your fiancee met her? Yes. She, she's met her. They get along. She loves her and she wants grandkids went on a trip together. Yeah, they did.

They went on a trip before I even got to go out with my mom. They went, she took my mom, took her to New York. I'm like, but you know what? That's so good though, because it comes full circle and it brings it back to like the idea of her accepting and like really opening doors for her, you know, and just being open minded to everything. What, when you found out that Nick was gay, did you have any, like, did you care at all? Not really.

I mean, my dad, my dad's side of the family, they're studs and on his side of the family. Yeah. You said they're studs on his side of the family. Lindsay didn't know what a stud was. I had to explain it to her. Yeah. Good thing it was now. Yeah.

I'm black and blue. She's lesbian and. Okay. So they're very accepting of it. Biologically or you're adoptive? No. Adoptive. Okay.

Adoptive. So they're kind of. I was already kind of around it. I mean, so, so it's really, it wasn't a shock for me, you know, I mean, I thought it was cool. She likes what I like. She dresses how I dress. Wait.

It's not hard to find gifts. You know what I'm saying? Is a stud like something that's like a new thing? No. No. That's been around for a while. It's like a word that's been around for a while. Yeah.

Yeah. It's like more of a, like a brown thing. Like studs. Okay. So like white people would call it butch, you know, but. No, I wouldn't call it that. But it's more common that you hear in like Hispanic or African American people, they call masculine women who dress like guys studs.

It's literally just the way you dress. Okay. Yeah. Got it. I hate labels. I hate labels. I don't understand the labels. No.

I don't call her a stud. I don't call her a stud. She sits. Yeah. Yeah. I just don't feel like it has to be like. A thing. A thing.

Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. Just for a lack of other words. When did you come out? Like when did you realize? I came out at 13. But I knew that I was gay.

To your parents? Yeah. To my doctor. Yeah. Okay. I just came out the closet at 13. I knew I was gay for a long time. I just didn't know that gay was a thing, you know, like I didn't know, like there was

a word for what I'm feeling, you know, I was just. What was her reaction to it? I told my mom first and she was like, don't tell your dad and like supportive, but don't tell your dad. Yeah. Like, like, okay, this is fine. Just don't tell him. Yeah.

Just don't tell your dad. And she actually cried. So and I think she knew though. Before. Yeah. She told me she knew. She was like, I knew because I didn't want to do the traditional female things, you know, like I didn't want to.

Wear dresses. And dresses. I didn't. That was the main thing. In Hispanic culture, you have a Quintanilla when you turn 15, and I was like, I was like, if I have one, can we wear Jersey dresses? She was like, I'll do whatever you want to do as long as you have one. And then I just kind of opted out and I was like, I don't want to wear any dress.

If that's cool, you know, and she was like, that's fine. But she said she knew at that moment for sure. Like, and I came out 13 and then later to my dad, he found a note probably like when I was 16 that I wrote to this girl, very provocative note on Valentine's Day. Oh, wow. And awkward. That's a weird thing. Awkward.

Awkward. Awkward. But he handled it way better. I was like, damn, I should have just told you first. He was like, man, I have gay cousins. He's like, anything you need to tell me, you tell me, I'm going to always be there. But maybe he knew too. Yeah.

I don't know. He acted like he didn't. What was your mom afraid then? I don't know. I guess she didn't feel like going down that route, you know, just maybe they never had that conversation. Yeah. I don't know.

Because my dad handled it pretty well. I was like, man, I should have told you first. Like, what was I thinking? So wait, your mom knew for like three years before your dad knew? Yeah. Three years. Yeah. And my dad knew that part.

No, she said that she came out at 13 to her mom. Oh, and then the dad found a note at 16. Yeah. So like, I had girlfriends and stuff like. And he had no idea. Wait, so was your mom letting you have sleepovers at your house with your dad not knowing that you were gay? No, not anymore.

So she shut it down. So the way she found out was horrible. I had lied to my mom, and it's the first time that online things were like happening in my space and stuff. And I had this girl move in with us. I was like, well, she has nowhere to go, this and that, like totally manipulated my mom and had this girl living with us. And she was my girlfriend.

And yeah. Wait, this was at 13? Yeah. And so. 13. And we were at church. Where were her parents? Oh, man.

I just found out what bongs were at 13. I didn't even know that this was a thing like living with each other and all that. Thanks to AOL instant messenger. We connected. AIM. Yeah. AIM. We connected.

Did you stick up your way message? Yeah. Around the house, BRB. Yeah. Exactly. TGG. Right. Exactly.

TGYL. Oh my gosh. Like, so yeah, she moved in and we were at church when I had to tell my parents. So this lady that found out she was my friend's mom and she was a lesbian in her past life, she said. What the fuck? Yeah. You don't be a lesbian in your past life.

Right. You're either. That's another story. Yeah. State or unit. Yeah. Yeah. So she was like, you have to tell your mom, no matter what.

Tell your mom. And so she went up to my parents right after church, me, my mom, my dad, my girlfriend. And she goes, hey, she has something to tell y'all when y'all get home from church or that ride home was so silent, awkward. My mom was like, like, I know when my mom was upset because she'd open her eyes real bit. I was like, she's like, another parent is telling me that you have something to tell me, like, what could it be?

You couldn't have made something up at that point. Man, I would have been like, I failed a Spanish test, but I don't even have Spanish. But I was so scared that they might talk and, you know, she brought it up like, hey, that was not her place, she was gay, you know, and it's weird because she was fully supportive that I was gay. She just thought my parents should know. Yeah, but she didn't mean that was not her place, that was not her position or her business. I was really upset, but yeah, my mom was crying and it went on and that's hard thing ended

up being okay. So did your girlfriend still live there? Right. That's the reason you're leaving me hanging. So my mom told me she had two weeks to get out and she was out in a week. Okay. And did y'all just sit together? No, she wouldn't.

No, we didn't. I was 13, like, that was the first time that, you know, the next week I was with some other girl or something. Yeah. In my own bag. Oh, my God. You know, I was like the only stud at school until like, for a while, like my junior year. And I was like, living the best life.

Living the best life with all the girls. Yeah. That's crazy. Like, I always love to hear, like, how people come out to their parents because you somehow sometimes hear people say like the craziest stories and then sometimes I'm like, why is this even a thing? Like, why is this like, why are people coming out? Well, you don't come out as straight, right?

So yeah, that's what I'm saying. What's the point? My mom's older brother never came out. Like it was just like, uh, we knew and we don't, we accept him and his husband, we don't, we don't care. And it's just not talked about, you know, like you should just come out. Yeah. I mean, if that's what you do, that mean that's what you do.

I just think like you just live your life to how you see fit. But then you hear like horror stories that they're like, won't accept their kids or you're going to be out of the will horrible. No, it's not. Yeah. Like, uh, the majority of homeless youth is LGBT because they're getting kicked out of their homes. So I just don't see how I just don't see how you could do that.

No. Yeah. That's crazy to me. Like, it shouldn't even be your business about what the next man sleeping with, like, I don't care. You know, especially your kids. So like why am I, you know, especially your kids, like, what, I don't care how you're having sex or what you're doing when you have sex.

Oh, I probably care. I just, I probably care, you know, and like practicing safe and like all that, but yeah, that stuff. Yeah. Yeah. I just, I don't know. And maybe it's just because we're all raised in a different time, maybe like things will change.

Yeah. Same generation. Yeah, for sure. Let us know like your YouTube channel, your social media is where people can find you. Cool. Cool. So I have four YouTube channels. My main channel started with my best friend is Studology 101.

Studology. Studology 101, class in session, and the next channel is with me and my fiancee, Nick and Les, and then I have my own channel called Not It's Nick, and my brother has a YouTube channel too. Right. Yeah, my YouTube channel is A-Leave King Lock. I go by that on every social media, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, Snapchat, everything. So yeah, I'm a musician.

If you girls want to Snapchat him, that's where you can find him. Are you single? Oh yeah. Left. Let him go. Yeah. Right in the background. Snap.

But yeah, like a little project I have going on right now, kind of not a little really big project, Gold Leaf CBD. So that's something I just landed a brand deal two weeks ago, and we are doing everything we can to release this product by June 1st. So like I'm being pulled left and right right now. We need to do a giveaway, a collab. I think so. We should do a huge giveaway for it.

I think so. It is CBD, we can offer a discount code or whatever, yeah, well Kim Kardashian's coming out with one. Oh, it's okay. It's with a line. So I'm like. We got this. We got this.

We were first. At least we can say that. Man. But anyway, thank you guys so much for telling your story and being a part of Coffee Combos podcast. We appreciate it. Thank you for real. We appreciate you.

All right, guys. I think that's all we have time for today. If you have not subscribed to us, you can do that by typing in Coffee Combos. Click subscribe, click the fifth star, and you can leave us a written review. We love to read those. We hope you guys have a great week and we'll talk to you soon. See ya.