Coffee Convos with Kail Lowry and Lindsie Chrisley - 86: Online Dating, Abusive Relationships, & YouTuber Brittani Taylor

Episode Date: July 4, 2019

Kail & Lindsie welcome YouTuber, Brittani Taylor. Lindsie admits to being afraid of Kail's illness & suffocating in her sleep. They reveal how Brittani avoided sex trafficking. They discuss online dating & why you should trust your gut. Brittani talks about being a virgin at 31, her lack of sex education, her pregnancy, & being a victim of abuse. If you'd like to follow Brittani's complete story, you can get her book, "A Sucky Love Story." Lindsie shares her first date with Will & more.

I feel like Dallas has been forever, but we've only been here for a few days, honestly, it's been a complete shit show. Totally. And I feel like we have learned so much about ourselves and like the last 48 hours that I didn't even know about myself or certain capabilities that I had and also that I don't have. Yeah, I, but it's weird because I was just here probably in February and I don't feel like it was as much of a shit show. So I'm not really sure what happened and why this was such a disaster. Well, partially I think because when you have multiple people with multiple personalities, you're so fly by the seat of your pants. Wait, did you mean like one person has multiple personalities? Yes, possibly. Possibly. Or multiple people with multiple personalities. Right, like everyone's different. No, no, no, no. I'm saying like multiple people individually with split personalities. I'm not one of those.

Kale's one of those. No. Actually, I busted in Kale's room at like 10 o'clock last night and she was in brawn underwear in bed and I didn't get out of with possible mono and I'm a germaphobe. So I'm kind of concerned and going to Clorox the mics before we leave. Yeah, so that I don't get mono. I don't know where I was. So I went to the doctor before I came to Dallas and I had to push my day back, my flight back to the following day. No, no, no. Can we rewind about all the flight changes that you had and how you were going to be filming? It was going to be filming for the show and we were going to maybe do Dallas Pride and all these things. And then I came home from camping. I think I mentioned before. Glamping.

My bad. They told me that I had strep throat, but they did not do a swab test. So they just based on my medical history or whatever they were like. Yep, it's strep. Here's some antibiotics, some steroids, steroid shot and beyond your way. I said, okay, can I get on a flight tomorrow? They said yes. As long as you've been on antibiotics for 24 hours, you're not contagious, you'll be fine. Great. Well, we're on day four now and I'm pretty sure I have mono. I don't think that it is in fact strep. Which is why I'm not going to question a doctor's ability because, you know, I'm no medical professional and I'm not going to diagnose anybody with anything. But why you would spend the time to go to urgent care and then look at your tonsils and say, oh, you have strep without doing a culture? Right. That's concerning to me.

Because I woke up this morning on day four feeling literally when I woke up, I was like, I cannot go back to sleep because I might suffocate. My tonsils are so big. Yeah. This is disgusting. People are going to ask me, they're probably going to harass me for even coming here while I'm sick. So question, I've only had strep throat one time and that was in like sixth grade. I think I've talked about it on the podcast before about how I was like quarantined to the basement. Yeah. Like a creature.

Yeah. And I felt like I was out of school for a really long time, but it probably wasn't, but I felt like it was two weeks. No, I've definitely been out of school for strep throat for like a week or two. So I'm going to say that it was two weeks because it kind of sounds a little bit more dramatic and a little bit better for the story. So two weeks out of school and I thought I was dying. My parents probably purged the couch that I was laying on because nobody, you know, wants to get strep. But I've heard that's the only time I've ever had strep in my life and you've had it since I've known you probably like six times. I mean, I've definitely had it more than the doctor told me I need to go get my tonsils out, but like I just don't have time.

I'm a mom. We work. I'm obviously working through the strep. So like I just don't have the time or, you know, the ability to just like take time like weeks off to recover. Like I just don't have it. Well, like moms do not get sick days ever. Ever. It's not sick days aren't a thing.

No, because even if there's a second person in the household, which for me, there's not even if there was that person is likely to be at work all day. And you're still taking care of the kids. Right. So it wouldn't really make a difference. And you can relate. And Kale was sending me pictures of Lux climbing all over her and like putting his fingers in her nose and like all this stuff. And I'm like, okay, great. Now Lux has it.

And now like the whole state of Delaware has it. Don't blame me. I got it from someone else. I don't know. Can you please tell the listeners what you told me about wearing a scarf to the airport? Oh, I said I was going to wear a scarf to the airport so that I don't contaminate it. I don't want them to say like team mom to spreads. Strep all over the airplane.

Strep all over American Airlines. Honestly, they pissed me off because they delayed the flight, changed the gate, did all that nonsense. So I had a terrible experience on my flight here. No Wi-Fi, which by the way, I always rave about Delta. I will forever be a Delta frequent flyer and they give Wi-Fi for free. So American, you're busted and I don't like you. And also they said, well, if you have a T-Mobile number, then you can get free Wi-Fi. And I'm like, first of all, who has T-Mobile?

I thought they went out of business. That's what I said. I said, wasn't T-Mobile like going under or weren't they like bought out by somebody? And she was like, oh, well, I don't know. I don't have T-Mobile either, but I have a friend who has T-Mobile, so I just put their number in. And I'm like, okay, first of all, that's extra and what's the number so I can have it for my Wi-Fi. But I was completely disconnected from the world for the flight. And then I asked the lady sitting next to me, bless her heart.

I don't even think she spoke English, but I was like, do you have T-Mobile? And she goes, yes, I have T-Mobile. And I'm like, bitch, give me your number so I can have Wi-Fi. But then she was saying they were playing Candy Crush. And I was like, okay, I just don't even have time for this. I'm just going to sleep. I have to say though, I do not typically get the Wi-Fi on the plane unless I really need it because I kind of like to be disconnected for those couple of hours.

You do? Yeah. See, I feel anxiety. Sometimes on the flight to LA because it's six hours for me. Sometimes I will. But typically I just... You never get the Wi-Fi. I know you don't.

Can you god damn Ben and Droll and let me pass out? And I've talked to my son probably like on FaceTime. You're not allowed to FaceTime on the plane. No, I've talked to him on this trip five times. I'm texting. The funniest message he sent me, I guess he was doing talk to text. And so it was so funny. I'm going to read it to you guys so that you can hear what it says.

Louise, mommy, that was my mommy, you're so awesome, Louise, mommy, went to his mom and you're so awesome, Louise, Molly would do it again. That is awesome. What was he trying to say? So I FaceTime with him and I was like, Jackson, were you trying to do the talk to text? He said, yeah, but it wasn't really working. He sent me this audio clip. Voice mail. Hold on.

Bad voice mail. Because he knew it didn't make any sense. I guess when it played back, it didn't make any sense. So then I FaceTime and I was like, what is all of this about? And he was like, well, I was just trying to say, that's so awesome, mommy. But I guess he kept trying to like say it over and over again. And it just kept saying Louise. I kept saying Louise, mommy.

That's great. Louise, mommy. And he's been wanting to FaceTime, Kale and I the whole time we've been here, he acts like I'm in a foreign country. I'm only in Dallas. And everything's fine. But I have major anxiety and I'm probably going to get more anxiety as this episode goes on. Because as I was surfing Instagram late one night, I came across a profile of a lady whose story just intrigued me. Is this what you're, our guest?

Yes. Okay. Lindsay, I don't, I was in the mall parking lot. I don't know what the fuck I was doing, but I was parked and I wasn't shopping. And I was probably getting pregnant with another kid. Oh my God. That was by myself. Perfect.

That's good to know. I get a text from Lindsay and she sends me this video with Shane Dawson and I think they're friends, Brittany. And she's telling her story about human trafficking. And I literally, then I definitely wasn't going inside the shop because I needed to watch all 20 minutes. Yeah. Like I needed to sit there and figure out what the fuck was going on. So same. All right, y'all, I have a quick question.

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Yeah. We'll do Cliff Notes with like the juicy parts because like anytime I've sat down to tell my story from like start to finish and I've done it so many times for lawyers and what not. It always takes like at least three hours. And by the end everyone's mouths are always hanging open. Oh mindless. I sent it to everyone I know. After I saw the video I sent it to everyone else I know. Yeah I mean because it's, I mean I feel like I'm a very, I'm a somewhat intelligent female and if it happened to me it can happen to anyone and I felt like now like the only way for me mentally to survive all of this was to turn it into something positive and like a way to raise awareness.

And I think that's what you have to do or else you just go crazy like why did I make these decisions? Well so can you introduce yourself to our listeners and kind of explain your backstory or however you would normally start about where all this started? Oh yeah of course. Okay. I was a typical struggling actress in LA and I discovered YouTube and once I fell into that black hole it sucked me in. You know I kept thinking you know if I just became a name online that would probably open up doors for acting and I would just be another brunette female in Los Angeles. So through YouTube I just, I met Shane who you talked about and it was really the videos that we did early on that blew up like my channel. Like I was you know he was an amazing friend and he's really talented and you know we did one called Emo breakup and that did really well and you know before I knew it I had this career on YouTube that's lasted I don't know 14 years.

Can I just stop you right there and just say that I think that people really don't give enough credit to like a career in YouTube. Like I think that it's so underrated. It's kind of under the radar like you know it'll be, I'll be at the you know if I go to the mall or certain places where I know my demographics are like 18 to 25 year old female. So if I'm at a venue that I know there'll be women they'll come up and then their parents are always super confused like who's. Yeah. What is this? Like what does she do? So I started doing like mostly like music video parodies and sketch comedy and I was doing a lot of scripted stuff and then I of course was not really dating and I kind of like really focused on my career and pushed my love life to the side and before I knew it I was 31 and I had a cute little

house and you know money in the bank and it was so lonely. So I did what most people you know do and turn to online dating and I had a friend that we were at a conference in Florida and I had never heard of Tinder before and he opened up his Tinder app and like started swiping and I'm like what are you doing? He's like I'm going to find myself a date and he started showing me the like the profiles and like you know I was just you know intrigued by it. It was like a grocery shopping for potential partners right? Like what do you want? Do you want blonde? Do you want curly hair? Do you want tall? They are who they say they are. You can kind of filter through and find some people and before I knew it I you know was going on a lot of dates and I had a few like short relationships and then I met Milo and it was kind of a weird space in my life because I had someone right before him that I was really you know thought I was in love with and you know her puppy love and he broke up with me to marry someone for her green card. So she was a Russian. So I saw on his Instagram one day a photo like I follow him like there's no way I wouldn't have seen this right? So it says my wife and like a photo of this new woman and I text him right away and called him out and I'm like are you serious? Like that's why we broke up? Like you're broke and instead of getting a job you got a wife? Like that really happened. That really happened. I was in a really like strange head space. I think I felt like I you know I was like okay I'm going to go for people different than I normally choose. I'm going to go for someone who has a job and a car. That sounds like Kale. Kale always says the next person I'm with is I hope he has a job and a car.

Yeah and like you know goals like you know they have like things they want to do in life and you know it's not just talks because people can talk a lot but actions speak a lot about that. Yeah and so you know when I saw Milo popped up and like right away I'm like one I'm like okay he was gorgeous and from Europe. How did he look like that in real life? Was he like really? Oh yeah I was like at first I'm not getting like what is this? You know he had like professional photos on his Tinder profiles. Like you know there was one of him like you know on a boat like with an oar over his shoulders and like bulging muscles and you didn't even tell it was like a professional photo. So I swiped right and immediately he was messaging me and being like you know hello beautiful like you know and I could tell if English was like a little broken and I was like whatever like you know I think I'd watch enough TV and movies that I think I had this romantic vision of like oh cute foreigner who's a doctor like gonna sweep me off my feet so I mean I was a little hesitant going into it like you know just because I had just gotten out of a relationship like two weeks prior with the other guy but I also felt like there was something I needed to prove. So we started talking he got my number right away he was messaging me he wanted to take me out like I remember it was like that Sunday we were supposed to go out for coffee or something and then Sunday came around and he blew me off. And so it was like oh great like another L.A. flake whatever move on. So I was you get used to it I mean that's just the world.

But I was at a convention in VidCon in Anaheim and then it was like two weeks later and I remember it was like 11 o'clock at night I was with one of my really good friends and his boyfriend. And Milo started messaging me like saying oh like come out for drinks we're in like Manhattan Beach like come you know me and my cousin and I was like oh great hookup like you know he obviously is just looking for that. And I kind of you know told him from there like look we had plans like you didn't follow through best of luck. So he's like no no you don't understand like give me another chance like that kind of thing and then the next day I went back to California and he was asking me like you're going to you know we should go out let's go out let's go. Let's go out let's go to coffee like you know and he kind of forced me into it and I was obviously really curious like who is this person that keeps like pursuing me like a doctor. Who is the person like you know I was very you know intrigued so we went to coffee and I went to this roasters place and like at the moment like I saw him I kind of knew I was in trouble. He was like you know six foot two and he had freckles and tan and it's cute little accent and very smart and well spoken and spoke all these languages and but I mean even from the start though there was something weird like I couldn't in my gut. I didn't know it's like I was having anxiety because he like you know had a job and he was like oh man I've been dating boys or I just couldn't place it but I think I knew from the start something wasn't right.

But as women I think sometimes we just ignore the red flags like not just anyone. I don't and maybe guys do it too I don't know but I think that every Lindsay and I can both you know yeah say that we probably ignored red flags that we shouldn't have. Well I don't really have like a dating major dating experiences because I've been with the person that I've been with since I was 19 so I don't really have all of the like tender bumble. I've never done I've never done them. I've definitely been in relationships where they're exhausting you're so lucky. Yeah because it gets stressful it's not and then you're like you start to overthink it like you know it makes I think it makes love easier and it makes also harder because you know you're going to these apps to try to find someone. But how do you know really just from a little profile and some photos like maybe that person just is really bad at writing out a description and had fuzzy pictures and they could have been the one so I think it's hard. It's hard sometimes when you know you try to take things into your own hands but we're all you know we're all just out there trying to find someone and when I was you know with me lotion you know one on that date like you know that first date

turned to two dates turned to like seven or eight dates and each day I would have major anxiety and I kept talking myself into it I'm like you know this guy he's obviously gorgeous like you're physically attracted to him like he checked every box if that makes sense. Yeah you know that's a red flag like when they check every box and you're like wait a minute. This is too good to be true. Yeah. Yeah exactly and I kept waiting for I think the other shoe to drop and then I remember like it was about date nine. I finally stopped fighting it a little bit and we're out you know in a park and we just had donuts and we're sitting down and just opening up about our lives and he had talked about before a lot about his wealth and you know that kind of turned me off because I'm not a person that's like you know I'm not money hungry like you know if you have a job cool it could be at McDonald's. I don't care like I. Right. It was a little weird that he was trying to I don't know I just thought maybe it was him trying too much to like impress me. That makes sense. Yeah. But I just I didn't like how he was talking about money so quickly and like the yacht they own and his family's businesses. He was big leading. Yeah but here's the thing though he had photos you know pull it up and show him like on the yacht and like you know it wasn't like him just talking like there was actual like proof of what was going on. Yeah. Yeah. By now you guys have heard us talking about how much we love our quick toothbrushes so I hope you ordered one for yourselves but if not you can do it now. Quick has finally updated the toothbrush situation with a sleek electric toothbrush that mounts to your mirror and is perfect for travel to. And now quick has a kids version of the toothbrush for smaller hands but with all the amazing features. It vibrates and then every 30 seconds it pulses you so you know when to switch sides which is great for kids who never seem to brush long enough. And they send you a replacement head every three months for just five bucks so you know you're

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not for and behind us and I think that anyone will tell you in a relationship with like their parents don't like you even if they've never met you that makes things really complicated so from the when we met got together his mom and her business partner started putting pressure on him right away to come back to Serbia because he was only supposed to come to LA to kind of like you know blossom steam he finished medical school he got his like masters and forensic pathology so he was actually in school. Yeah well he you know he was in he had just graduated from the University of Belgrade in Serbia so he had he had been in the US for it was only supposed to stay for a little while had been for almost two years when I met him and his family was like no like there's beautiful women in Serbia like go back to Serbia why are you dating this girl it makes silly videos on YouTube I don't understand so he was getting financial support from his family it was like 30,000 a month and then when it was legit. Well I mean he had an apartment in Beverly Hills he had an apartment in Rina Del Rey he had a really nice Lexus like everything he owned was designer like at that point I like believed that this was legit so basically when when he the family like cut him off financially I he at first was teaching tennis lessons because he was a tennis pro before and he tore his ACL so his clientele was mostly like rich women that were in their like 50s and they were always very like friendly with him and I think they just want to like stare at him more than anything so he you know needed to finish his medical boards here in the United States before he can practice medicine and if he was deciding to stay with me he needed to finish his boards and get a job here in the United States so we met in July and then by November of that year I said look because he was just driving back and forth on the 405 and that freeway is terrible and not getting his boards done I said I will financially support you

if you you know want two months to get your boards done just study and then you know get it done and then you know get to work kind of thing but the two months turned into four months turned into six months it got really crazy because about January of 2016 we had a woman contact us saying that like you know she basically was saying that Milo should her work together and that don't believe anything you saying and then he told me she was a call girl so she was just that she was just blackmailing him for money had found out about his family's wealth and whatnot and it felt like we he just couldn't get the boards done his drama kept happening if that makes sense and I at that point like he started to get very verbally abusive and I was kind of taking it because I felt like it was my fault like I felt like okay I'm the one they do him yeah they do and and I also felt like he has given up everything for me he always said like I had everything when I met you at everything and you know I felt like I had put stress on him financially and his family just because he wanted to stay in the United States and date me if that makes sense so I mean it got to a point though after the whole bunny thing happened with like her saying that they were sleeping together that I was like okay I just I went to New York in March of 2016 and when I was gone I was like oh I don't think I'm in love with this person anymore and I felt like the best thing would have been at that point for him to move out you know get a job and then maybe we just start dating and not be together and then just see if he can like you know get established on his own two feet but at that point when I was in New York I started really craving like chicken and like protein and it was weird because I was vegan and I'm like why do I just want a quest bar like what is wrong with me and then my period was late and I thought maybe it was I was stressed but then like four days five days like nine days later I kind of had it in claim that I may be pregnant so before I even

left New York I want an Amazon and I ordered like a bunch of pregnancy tests you know they have those like packs like 25 yeah yeah I didn't know that but for future references thank you and it's fantastic yeah you can just buy the like the little so like they're so I that was already at my house by the time I got back to California I you know Peter the cup dipped it in and like within seconds it was like pregnant again pregnant pregnant pregnant and I was like are you kidding me I want to break up this person and also I forgot also at that point Mila should have told me to this family had like mafia ties so part of the reason why that woman that they had come out like blackmailing that she stopped contacting and left him alone and she said you know he said that like they're the business partner and his mom took care of it and like what do you mean they took care of it like well basically he told me that they had sent like a car and like you know put a gun to her head and basically silenced her wow great so I'm involved with like a Russian monster but I mean again I'm an empathizer so I was like okay he had gone to medical school was trying to make something of his life he had you know left that business like what if I was born into like a mafia family like you can't help who your parents are sometimes like you know even but I was it was freaking me out and I kind of wanted to break up with them but once I got pregnant I had this father of my child living in the house and I had really horrible morning sickness so for about five months I stopped time out how did he react to the pregnancy was he excited was he nervous did he not want the baby well he had forever said that he wanted me like I would be a good mom like we need to have like four kids he had talked about having a family before like eventually but like I'm a very like I wanted to get married and like you know wait till right before my eggs are going to expire harvest them and maybe like

what do you think about it like I'm a very like I'm a workaholic and I love kids but it wasn't on my like life your career was coming first yeah I'm just I'm super OCD and I had this very like life plan and it was kind of messing with things like I wanted to be married and he at first was shocked like he didn't talk for like five minutes straight but then he I don't understand that like you can only get pregnant by not pulling out like you know here's the thing no no he okay Milo she was a medical doctor right and I had never had you know sex before yes I had sex education in high school but he told me that if he if he pulled out that I couldn't get pregnant so and I kept asking him do I need to be on birth control do I need this is not this is not I didn't feel he's like no it's like he's like even too healthy people that you know are trying have like you know really hard time having a child so it was my own naivete that and I mean at that point too I kind of felt like he got me pregnant I think he knew I was starting to like pull away and you know I was declaring my independence and you know I was you know he could tell you know people you can just tell you can pick up on the energies you can tell that you're not driving the way you were yeah yeah I think he knew and so so I you know was very like upset at him for like five months really you know getting me pregnant and I spent five months just throwing up like in the house it wasn't my third trimester that I finally got where I was like you know not queasy or I think I just also got really used to being nauseated so you know I was like okay I can be in the car and like a little green like I can do this so yeah about my third trimester Milo should tell me when I first met him that he did a little stint in oil and he invested money because his family has all these businesses they have a coffee company you know a furniture

company whatever he had done some in oil and he invested in this fund and he told me his portion that he was getting was $10 billion and I'm not he had a sheet from the bank showing the bank account all the information he had a setup with a real estate agent in Malibu and start looking at multi-million dollar homes because he was sure in a month or whatever that he was going to have like you know $150 million and we can easily get a house so he kept saying you know you don't need to keep your place in Highland Park because we're going to be you know getting one of these places and like unless you want to kind of thing and I was like okay well my house at that point with a spending family was going to be too small but I just don't understand like for him to he didn't actually have that but what did he think after you guys were going to buy this house with the with the fake sheet or whatever it was you know the bank statement we couldn't but how we're going to pay for that monthly like it's a monthly mortgage like how would you have but I think at that point though he there was something going on they would have been able to yes they would have been able to get the money I don't know I don't know if it was their money but they would have been able to get it yeah they would have been able to and like you know you have talking about how they would need to like wash it multiple different ways and go through multiple different banks because they can only like handle certain increments now looking back it seems really shady but you know at that point I did trust him and like that's not my expertise and like if he has proof of income of this that like a real estate agent believes him and we start looking at properties like you know come on

and you know I believed him and I mean it did it did weird me out a little bit because I felt like you know am I still with him because I'm pregnant and for security and it's like yeah I think the most terrifying and like time in a woman's life is when she's pregnant because you are so vulnerable yeah you're you're so vulnerable I thought the most powerful whenever I was pregnant to be perfectly honest so you did it you had love though right yeah a solid relationship and that's the difference that you have someone that you love that you created this life with and you are now creating another form of life and expression of your love like that is powerful when you're in a solid relationship but when you're not in a solid relationship it is terrifying because you almost feel like you're being bought or I felt like I was concerned that I was forgiving him and going along with things because he was just the father of my child and it would mean financial security because now I am so pregnant and cannot work because like I can't see my toes. I'm sure you guys have seen those face wash systems that are super expensive and abrasive for your skin and anyone who has problem skin knows that you'll try anything to get clear skin but there's a better solution which is bio clarity. Bio clarity is a three step system that clears your skin without the harsh chemicals or crazy price tag. I personally have been using the clear skin routine as I've talked about before. I love bio clarity and if you have not tried it I would definitely recommend it. It travels easy. It's very simple doesn't take a brainiac to be able to use it and that's one thing that I absolutely love about it.

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Were you kind of like sharing the story and like your relationship struggles and stuff with people around you like your mom your friends like did you have anyone to confide in did anyone else recognize red flags because I sometimes I feel like the people around you will notice red flags because they're not in that situation. So did you get any feedback from people around you at this point like were they like you're moving too fast or this is were you keeping it a secret from people because you were not sure or ashamed or. I think any victim of abuse will tell you that you try to defend your abuser so it's it's like I would tell my mom like he yells at me a lot or he's always really angry but I wouldn't go into details about like the extent of abuse or what he was doing like. It's like you need someone to confide in and talk to you but you don't want to say too much you don't you don't want repercussions but it comes back on you because then he would blow up at me and then I would have to deal with it so I think I. Had I am definitely hit on YouTube like you know they don't understand like all these blogs like I was only filming 1012 minutes a day there's 24 hours in a day so like I remember I would have I had some auditions that would happen for big TV shows and Milosh would always pick a fight with me and then. End up like I really need to learn the lines and like go to this audition and Milosh would just be be like terrible to me like almost sabotaging it and I didn't fill many of that I didn't I didn't put that part out because I didn't want my audience to hate him but. Going back to like red flags I don't I think my mom she kept saying like you need to stop like I don't care if you stress that you can't keep yelling at Brittany like I don't she's pregnant like what. And we had our first instance of like domestic violence when I was pregnant because I was that I had a weird hormone flux and I was just like you know I hate the world and I wanted him out and I hated being pregnant and I got a black trash bag and I started

picking up all this stuff and then he ended up chasing me around the house and I would try to call 911 he ripped the phone out of my hand and hurt my pinky but then I pushed his face away and he was like my eye my eye like you hurt my eye I'm a doctor like how am I going to be able to see whatever and ran out of the house so I immediately felt like I had hurt him so it was very confusing but again that's the manipulation right in it you can't get it's like a hole it's like a rabbit hole that you can't get out of. And they're and they're and they're that good like anyone going oh I know it's like these people like especially you know my ex are so good at what they do and we'll you know so like fast forward a little bit so we get you know we basically are going for the house like you know but then he tells me that the banker ran away with all the money at this point I had put my house up for sale in Highland Park and we had already had offers on it like we're at the point that we're going to be like closing and I couldn't like I didn't going like my real estate agent was one of my really good friends and she had already put in all this time and effort and work and I couldn't just like stop the sale because Milo's you know wasn't going to get the money and I thought okay well he's still going to get his boards done he even said what do you want to do like you know the we'll get the money but what do you want to do and I said okay we'll stick to our plan which was get down to San Diego because there's four major hospitals that have residencies easily once he gets his boards done get a job. So I you know we sold my house I was in October I was you know I was a month away from being you know giving birth and I'm like packing up everything in major nesting mode and I you know Milo's was still studying and we moved down to San Diego and when we got to San Diego is when things kind of hit the wall I think I the moment I like left my house I kind of knew that like things have been worse and worse and I kept thinking why can't our relationship just get a break like why why is every time that we get better it's like we take two steps

backwards but I think it's like other people who are in an outside perspective and they don't understand what it's like to be in a mentally or physically abusive relationship they're always like why didn't you get out or like they they don't understand that you just I don't know I feel like it's like you're in a sunken place sort of well they work you slowly they don't like I remember at first like the fights weren't huge but like he they figure out where to push and what hurts you and how to manipulate and they're really good at it so he like knew the buttons to push to like keep me in line or keep me in my place and he went at me for hours and hours and it becomes conditioning where you just don't want them to scream at you for four hours you're willing to do whatever they want just so they don't yell at you but then you still can't get out and I can definitely relate to that yeah and the tricky part too was I'm down in San Diego and I started to realize like wait a minute he like you know now we're not getting a house I'm you know was I sold my house because I was like also 30,000 or more in debt because of all the months that I didn't work and I'm financially supporting me lotion panel car payments and doing everything and all the medical bills so you know thankfully the house and cleared a lot of the debt but then I only had money for like two three months living and he needed to get a job so we got down to San Diego and I just got really weird I was like you know I you know I'm very pregnant my mom had helped us move and my computer had broke so my mom was on me lashes laptop because I was editing on my laptop and not my desktop because it was being repaired and she just wanted to go look at my YouTube channel so she started typing YouTube into malicious laptop and automatically it started populating like you just you porn and my mom's like pretty what is this so I'm like huge pregnant come over to the laptop and I went into a history in the past two or three days were fine it was just as like us Emily test like quizzes like you know his new sites but I just went into the history and started typing like keywords.

I found out like all the night similar study was studying while I was pregnant he was basically watching porn all night long and like interactive porn and I took screenshots and I was gonna make it like his like screen like his background and his screen saver. When he came home I be like you know me what's this we need to talk but I you know I was really hurt because I feel like you know being pregnant is like a very like sacred point in time and like you know he was supposed to be studying and he was just watching porn all night long right so I think you know I got those started get those mommy protective instincts and I was like wait a minute I'm letting this man be like verbally abusive to me and not treat me the best and I'm paying for everything I think I started to wake up a little bit I was like shouldn't he treat me a little bit better if I'm taking care of everything. So to be perfectly honest when you're telling me this story. I think the way Kale explained it like people on the outside obviously it's like all after the fact and you're telling this story. Everything from like the start has been a red flag for you. Because you've never been in a relationship right like an abusive I don't want to speak for you but yeah whereas like for me I've been in an emotionally and abusive physically and emotionally abusive relationship and separately too so I can kind of see maybe the red flags that were

ignored and then you continue with the relationship but then you can't get out of it where like you have you're not understood from the jump why she was in it right. So they start to change you like he was lovely for the first three four months like Chris turns charming and then you're on the hook. You love them and it's like a drug and then they slowly start to manipulate and like you know with my acts being like a sociopath like it's a slow play. They enjoy it so it's not quick. It's very like it's a slow manipulation so by you know the more and more things that I allowed to happen. It's like he made me feel like I was doing everything wrong like even before my son was born they were talking about getting him like Bosnia and Serbia and citizenship and like we need to go to Serbia like you know we do all this stuff. Then I just started it's got weird for me. I'm like my son's an American citizen like and I started looking up you know what do you need to apply.

It's like no he just apply himself for citizenship for our son and get approved. I wouldn't even need to be you know approving it for him to get it and let's say we went to Serbia and our son was Bosnia and Serbian citizen and he you know is a citizen. I'm not. They could stay with my son and just send me home like I would have no legal rights. And that's scary. So scary. Yeah I started a little weird and I kept pushing it like when you know when he's four to five months old like we're going to the Serbia will get married all these things. So my son was born and his mom who I'd met before and you know she was nice like I didn't have any like weird things.

She just turned into like this Graham monster. The monster. My son was born. What is it called? Monster. Yes I could not do anything right. Like she put on a diaper right. I didn't bathe him right.

I wasn't burping him right. I wasn't doing anything right. I think that's relatable to a lot of people because yeah I mean not just in in your situation and I don't want to. You know downplay your situation but. Oh no not at all. Yeah. And a lot of people's lives I think that with their in-laws it's hard when it's not like the maternal grandmother because the maternal grandmother normally has a little bit more leverage because of the mom you know. And yeah and any more time and they're more comfortable in the room with them.

Right. And so I think that as the paternal grandmother she probably wanted to see you do things the way that like she felt was right but maybe the way that she did them was in a way of like aggression and control. But it was weird though because like she would take like my son was only a few years old and he was crying and I was like that and she would come and take my child from me and she would go my baby my baby and I was like no I just gave birth. This is my son like you know I. That could have been a huge sharing process you know like when you bring a new being into the world it's like you have to to learn to share but it's really hard with the mother because you go as a mom you go through like all of the things after you have a baby. That it's like okay I have done all of this for nine months and it's my baby. It was a weird situation though like I was around like other family members of his to but they you know they didn't treat it was like very possessive and when you know I finally had to talk to her about after four days I was like hiding out in the room because I'm right in the hospital. My mom we had got a bunch of trays of food because like luckily in San Diego at the hospital they had like catering.

So when we're in there that they ordered like breakfast and the my mom was going to hand me lunches tray and she yanked the tray out of my mom's hand and she was no I feed my son and like weird behavior so. It sounds like a sense of grooming to me. Did you ever did you make human trafficking ever crossed your mind at any point during this. I don't know what that was the conclusion that Milosh came to in the episode. I can't like legally say he was going to do this but everything was leading up to where it's getting very strange because like when my son was four days old I finally like four or five days old I finally wanted to just talk to her. Her English was really good and because she would understand a lot of what I was saying and like even when she pretended like she didn't. So I wanted to just sit down with her and say I just need you to be supportive and I just needed some supportive words and have that conversation just to get her to back off a little bit. And she went crazy right away and was like would you want us to leave and I was like I don't know I'm trying to talk this through it's like would you want us to leave.

And I said and she goes she started screaming at me she goes my baby my baby and I said no he is my son and that's when she went to her bedroom grabbed all her stuff through it in her suitcase. And Milosh and his mom and the dog left. So I just kind of like birth and then this random apartment in San Diego Milosh moves out with his mom to some hotel. And that's when things got really bad and Milosh would just come back like every day or every few days and he said I wasn't allowed to leave the home for the first month because our son you know immune system wasn't fully developed. So I didn't leave the apartment for one month. Well I basically that's relatable. That's relatable. I mean, yeah, for me.

I mean I'm sure he had different reasons but I didn't. I think I didn't leave home probably for the first time with my son other than to just do like the standard doctor's appointments. He was born in late December and I didn't probably take him out of the house until the second week of February. Yeah, it's not it's not it's not bad but the hard part was I wasn't allowed to leave and all I had to do all day was wait for Milosh to come back and like I just wanted to fix things. I mean, did you trust him at that point like if he was to come back to the house to see you know you and your son you know where you could like take a nap and he would you know kind of care for the baby or was he not hands on or what did that look like. He was he was completely emotionally detached from the moment that child. So why was he even coming around. I don't know he would come and scream at me and I started I started I got to the point I started documenting things as I thought legally I might need this so I started writing town like this day he said this like I remember one time.

I said to him as I wish things could go back to the way they were and he just was off and screaming he was grabbing his clothes that he had left and throwing them on the floor and my mom had come like she was with our son in the other room because I wanted him like away and I was like curled up on the bed crying like just begging him to stop and my mom like needed another diaper for my son. So she came over to like knock on the door and Milosh opens it a little bit and like starts screaming at her and she just like I need a diaper and he goes you get out you get out and you slam the door right in her face and it was like right. It almost hit my son and my mom and like I think at that point I knew I needed to get out. I just didn't know how and it was weird like he only wanted photos of my son even from the start his mom never took a photo of me and the baby it was always just the baby. She kept talking about how his skin was so smooth and he had no flaws and it was weird. I was thinking well if he had three eyes I don't care it's my son. I didn't understand the talk about him being like flawless or you know would even matter.

So I wanted to break up with him but then I got to the point that he was really sick and he had strapped throat. Going back to the worst for about 10 days and so he couldn't see me or Rex and then he started going to the doctor and it wouldn't go away. He had like a white streak down the back of his throat and they basically told him that he had cancer. So like this is what he's telling you or this is. Yeah he told me at first that he had milioi milioi fibrosis. It's a really rare form of blood cancer and the symptoms that he had do correlate with the symptoms that he was having like I went online and Google. Don't tell me that because I'm a hypochondriac. Yeah, you're fine.

Kale will go back to her room. She's going to go back to her room and be like I had cancer. Are you slain? You're slain and swollen and all these things. Like don't you're fine. But when this happened like he told me that they found out he had a milioi fibrosis and that was like devastating because my dad passed away from cancer. So I was like not again and I kept like praying to God I'm like this could not be happening. Like why things just get worse and worse. So I told my mom I'm like I need you to go back to Arizona.

I like I need to work things out with a father of my child. So my mom ended up leaving Milo she moved back in. But the first day he was there was our second instance of domestic violence. So it was like deja vu like he was out of control. He was holding her son. He was like screaming at me basically telling you that I caused this like you're the reason that all the stress you cause like you're the reason I had cancer. And he was just crazy. So I didn't believe that to do.

I did. Well I mean at that point I think I did now. No. But at that point I felt like everything was my fault because it always was. So so I was crying trying to call 911. And again he like you know ripped the phone out of my hand and a hyper send in my pinky and my son had split up on me earlier. So when we finally calmed down he gave me back my phone. I remember I went into the closet and I really quickly snapped some photos of my pinky because my pinky had like balloons.

Like three times the size of what it should be. Then I changed the lock screen on my phone because I want to make sure Milo couldn't get access to him. And I just hung on to him because I knew I might need them. But at that point too I felt like he has cancer. He's terrified. I made excuses for his behavior. But as this went on things got really weird because he wouldn't let me come to the hospital with him. And I was like well we can even have your mom watch.

I want to come to one of your appointments and he kept insisting no. You trusted his mom enough to let her around the baby by herself? Not really. But I was thinking well he has cancer and he's going and getting treatment on his own. And I thought well I at least want to meet his doctors or see what he's doing. And then they told me that they had misdiagnosed and he thought he had chronic lymphoplastic leukemia which has a really high cure rate. So we're like yay good news. He could be legitimately cured in two months at that point.

But it just kept not adding up. I'm like how is he getting tanner every time he goes to an appointment. And how is he still playing tennis. Well he told me in between his appointments he was sitting outside on the bench getting some sun just because he was depressed. And I was like but he's getting tanned everywhere. Are you sitting at the hospital with your shirt off? It was getting weird. But it was weird because he had the cancer symptoms.

He would sweat all night long. He was throwing up. He could have been under me all the time. And I was like we're getting to there. So then he had his heart was racing. He still had that white streak. Like his glands were swollen. Like all this weird stuff.

He was dropping a bunch of weight. So he kept telling me that he was on. It was what's called rotuxaban or rotabab or whatever it's called. And interferon alpha. They're immunotherapy drugs. Right. So I was up really late one night and I kept bugging him. I'm like why are we not going to like New York or like Texas.

Why are we not going to a really good cancer hospital if your family has all this money. Right. So I started looking up how these drugs were administered. And it said by IV and everything clicked. I'm like there wasn't a mark on his body. Because when I was pregnant in the hospital I had an IV for two days. They leave it in in case they need to have any surgery or you need to have a C-section. And I had a purple mark.

Like any person that's had an IV always have a mark. Right. And if he was getting those drug administered you know every couple days for months he should have been riddled with like purple and black and blue marks on his hands and arms and everywhere and there was nothing. So at that point I knew he was taking cancer. So I had to make a quick plan with my mom and when I was away from him I broke up with him and then I had you know the evidence from the photos and I filed for a police report

and I went through a trial for domestic violence and then I ended up getting a two year restraining order against him and then also full custody of our son. So did you leave like in the middle of the night and not tell him? No I was very smart. I told him because basically I'm the breadwinner so he needs money. Right. So I had legitimate meetings set up in Los Angeles and my son was still breastfeeding. So it was the perfect excuse to get away from him.

So my mom came into town to help me with my son even though he couldn't really stand my mom at that point because he's trying to separate us but my mom came into town. We went to LA. I wanted to file a police report in LA and they said you need to report it in the county of the crime. I'm like you have to be kidding me. So I had to go, I broke up with him by text message, had him move out his stuff. He stole my birth certificate and other things.

So I and also had, we had to have the locks changed right away because the way he left stuff he obviously still had keys because he put everything inside and locked the door but the key was inside so we knew he had an extra key. So then from there I had a police officer come over, file a police report, went myself the next day to the courthouse, stood in line, applied for the temporary restraining order and then I got a good lawyer. But the hardest part is not, the hardest part is not always when you're in it. The hardest part is when you get out because there's that fear factor and they use it against

you and I had, he had also recorded me in the shower. He had what he thought was blackmail on me. So it was a very scary process but I got my backbone back and what I didn't do for myself, I did for my son. So he moves out. Do you stay in the apartment or did you get a new place? I had to stay there. I wasn't allowed to leave because of the, I got to go to another apartment.

I had to stay in San Diego County and it was another like month until our trial for the, just the first initial like, you know, it wasn't the full trial. It was the first initial date to set the trial. I had to wait for permission from the judge to move out of state. The judge knew what we were asking and they approved it. They let me move out of state with the son and my son, you know, his name was Misha at birth but now Rex, Rex moved with me to Arizona and only the court had our address. So that was protected through the court.

Okay. So through all of this was, I know you have the restraining order. So was there any type of contact with him or it was just kind of like you were, it was done and then you haven't seen him since or what, what is that like now? I mean, legally, I can't talk about it. I don't think it'll ever be done. Like legally, you know, you'll know anyone that has been involved with a sociopath, it's never over, especially if you get away.

So I, you know, the question for us is like for, for us, just personally, because we're nosy about this and probably for the listeners, like, does he still exist in the United States? Like how does it work with you even communicate, like communicating, talking about this openly, your fears associated with that? Like just as a woman, how is that? Yeah, he's not had any contact with or tried to see Rex since I, or he didn't even ask about him at all during the trial.

Well, would you have let him even if he asked? I went illegally. He wasn't during the trial. He went to have been allowed to, but even afterwards, I mean, legally, he can see him if he wanted to, but he had to come to my county of residence. He has to pay all the fees. And is it supervised? Because I would be scared that he would take my son leave.

No, no, no has to be supervised. It can only be him. He cannot have anyone else with him and only for two hours at a time twice a week is what it would be. And I'm allowed to move anytime I want. And within like, you know, they made it really strict for liberal California courts. So he is not acted upon trying to see his son. And he has done this to any other women.

And if he has other children, yeah, I, yeah, I mean, that's the lowest heart. I tried to leave that out of the, like, because I started writing my book while the trial was going on, because I just needed someone to talk to. And I couldn't legally talk about it in a YouTube video. And I just started talking to my computer. But while I was writing it, he got involved with another woman because I, being on social media, like she's on social media too, his new wife. And this woman contacted me on Instagram and she's like, Brittany, like I,

here's, you know, Milo and Louie with another woman. Like, I don't know what happened with you, but should I be concerned? She's a friend of mine and she's this fitness blogger. Like, should I warn her? And I couldn't say anything because I was fighting for restraining order. And then like, just following that, then I got follow up messages, like, did you know she's pregnant? Did you know they're married?

So during my trial, like within a few months, he'd already met someone else, then got her pregnant and then married her. So where's her child? Is her child a thing? And joined the army. I don't know. He joined the army? Is that even legal?

Yeah, he, well, here's the thing. Like he testified all during the trial that he was the first Serbian doctor and whatever. And like, you know, I'm only allowed to say so much on FOIA request because a lot of that is like protected information. But I can say he did not enlist as a doctor in the army. So we did find out exactly what he enlisted as. I'm not allowed to say that, but he did not enlist as a doctor.

I just feel like that should not, he should not be allowed in the army. I don't, I don't, maybe they liked his language that he speaks, you know, Serbian and Russian because he does. But you can't trust him. You can't trust what he's going to do with the information. You don't know what he's capable of. I don't know. I can't, we have tried following, like we've spent, sent like multiple FOIA

requests to follow up on other things and not like, you know, that a lot of it's in appeals. Like we don't have answers to things, but I don't know. I don't know they're thinking or why, but maybe because all I tried to tell you guys why, when I first met him, he told me that this woman was his grandmother in Beverly Hills. Well, that was actually his wife. So when I met him, he was married to an elderly, like Russian woman.

And she was really hot though. She's gorgeous. And she, it was her apartment and, and, you know, in Beverly Hills, it was her house in the Hollywood Hills. She paid for the place in Marina Del Rey. She paid for Louis. She was the reason that Milos had like a temporary green card for like two years. So when I met him, he was actually married.

And the woman that contacted me, he did cheat on me. The one that he said was a call girl. She's not a call girl at all. And she said, you know, we don't even know if he's a doctor. Even now I can't say, I don't know. I don't know. I don't know if his name is Milos. I know that the coffee company that they said they own, they don't own.

I know what I think I figured out is that all these businesses, they're kind of like leeches. They present themselves to these foreign companies that maybe don't have an American contact. And they say, oh, we'll sell your coffee in the United States. Does that make sense? And then they tell the United States people like, oh, this is our company, but we don't, we get 10% of any coffee.

And they say, oh, we'll sell your coffee in the United States. But we don't, we get 10% of anything. So they figure out a way by attaching themselves to the people that have these companies that are legitimate businesses to, you know, get them something they need and then get a percentage of it. So it was just everything you told me. He told me also that he worked at this hospital, right? And then he was a doctor and he had a key card from this hospital with his

photo on it. Well, it was probably a janitor. And then I'll come to find out. He contacted the, the head of surgery who was his friend. And basically he got him an unpaid internship in his lab. Milo showed up, filled up, filled out like the paperwork, got his key card and then never showed up to the lab. So he posted on his LinkedIn, his Facebook, everywhere that he was a,

you know, employed by this hospital as a doctor. And, you know, I mean, you didn't state doctor. You just had employed at, you know, UMI, but it was another, you know, again, obviously there's no UMI hospital. I have to change the name, but it was a hospital in Orange County that was legitimate. So I, everything he told me was a beautifully crafted lie. It's so crazy to wrap your head, try to wrap your head around this

entire story and all the details. And, you know, there's so many things that play into a relationship like this and kind of like piggybacking off of what Lindsay said. It's really hard for someone who hasn't been in a relationship like that to kind of understand how you could get involved with something like this. And the complexity of a story like this. Yeah, like it's so hard even when you're, you've been in one and you're listening and you're like, wow, like how could this happen to

somebody? And, you know, I don't know, I feel like I looked at your YouTube before and I was like this, it would have been hard for me to really picture you going through something like this because I did see some of your other videos and I know how positive they are and how raw you are. And people, your fan base loves you. I tweeted about, you know, having you on the podcast today and, you know, everyone just couldn't stop tweeting about how great you were.

So it's so crazy that, you know, you have gone through something like this and, you know, we're fortunate enough to have had you on the podcast today. And yeah, I think you just, and it's hard. And, you know, people, if they do go through it, you can't. Like the hardest part for me was not like forgiving Milo. She was forgiving myself. Right. Because you got all this guilt.

Like why, why, why didn't I miss that? You look back, but the thing is, it happened. And hindsight is always 2020. You can't always see what's going on when you're in this situation. And that extreme charisma is like, it's, it's intoxicating. And like people like him have it. Like they just, you know, there's those people that walk into a room and everyone notices and they can wrap everyone around their fingers.

And you can't, they're, it's hard. It's really hard to resist that kind of person. And it's funny because my husband is probably completely opposite of that type of personality. He's like not a finesse or he has no charisma. You know, it's just like charisma. But you know what I mean? It's like, he's not like trying to.

He's not smooth. Yeah. He's not smooth. Like anything that he ever does, if he's like trying to be sneaky about something, he gets caught. Like he's not, he's not slick Rick, you know, so. Yeah. It's, and I'm not really attracted to slick Rick either.

I am. I for sure am. Like I'm easily like this could have happened to me. Right. Because of me not being attracted to that. I can't see myself in this situation, but I'm not going to say that it couldn't happen. You know, I think it could happen to anybody, but I think there's certain

personalities that like you, Brittany, you were attracted to his slick rickness and. I was, but also like he just, he figured out what I needed. And I wanted like a, you know, really sweet guy. So he was a sweet good listener for months before, you know, the true colors came out. So you can, they're just, they're like, they're chameleons and you can't like, I think the, the biggest thing, even if you would never be attracted

to it, it's good for people that have been in abusive situations to talk about it. Because then even if you would never fall for that, you could help someone who was going through it. Right. How else you understand unless you, I tried to like write it from when I was writing the book from my mindset. So you would understand how I fell for everything.

So, you know, it's, it's harder here. But like when you read about everything and then like, you start to understand how I mentally justified everything. A lot of people, you do that. Definitely what let us know, let our listeners know what your book is called and where people can find you, your YouTube, any social channels and things that you're working on now. Okay.

My book is called a sucky love story overcoming unhappily ever after. It's on audible iTunes at Barnes Noble, Amazon, iBooks, wherever books are sold. My YouTube channel is Brittany Louise Taylor, B-R-I-T-T-A-N-I. And I have some other stuff that scripted that I'm working on, like possibly like, you know, scripted podcaster, but it's not anything that will be as raw and real as my story was. So I'd rather do things that are more creative and not so hard because

like, you know, you can only live in that for so long. And I, you know, I went there, but I just don't, I don't, I want to move forward. As you should. Well, thank you so much for taking your time to tell our listeners your story and to let us get a little bit more information from what we've seen from YouTube and your social channels. Well, thank you for having me.

You guys have been lovely. I've not done most of the talking, but we, we only got like an hour. We got to like tack it in. It is a lot. Well, thank you so much. And we hope you have a great afternoon. Thank you too. And I hope I get to meet you guys some day in person.

We will. Thank you. Okay. Good. Bye girls. Bye. Okay. Well, that whole interview and the whole story is so crazy to me.

It's insane to me because I don't really understand like modern day dating, I guess. Well, I've never been on a dating app either. So I can't. I can't relate on how that kind of stuff happens and I can't. But even for me, like I said, being in an abusive relationship, I don't see how she didn't see the red flags. Right.

I mean, from the fact of, I guess I'm kind of like speaking from a point. If when I was dating will, if he would have given me anxiety, he gives me anxiety now. But when I was dating him, the only he gave me anxiety on our first date because he was drunk and he told the waiter that he wanted to order me the soup de jour and I don't even like soup. So that gave me anxiety. But other than that, on our first date, he was drunk.

Soup de jour. Like soup of the day or something. And the waiter came to the table and was like, he will goes, the madam will have the soup de jour. I was like, I'm never dating this guy again. But then I did. Right. So I kind of relate in that instance.

But I think mine was more of like a funny anxiety and hers is probably like I might get killed anxiety. Yeah. That's like more what I would have thought was going to happen was like he was going to try to kill her like based on what she said in the beginning. You know, and kind of how it played out and he blew her off. And then he was like so adamant about meeting up with her after that. But I was like, oh, he definitely wants to kill her.

Yeah, it almost makes you think like there was there was something like premeditated. I think if somebody blew me off, I would just I don't have anything invested in them already. So I'd probably just be like, okay, whatever. Right. Like I never meet up with them again. Right.

And I'm not like I said before, I'm not really, I've never been into like slick ricks, you know. Yeah. And I feel like you're probably into that. I mean, now I'm not. But old me for sure, slick ricks getting smooth, smooth talking their way right in. Right.

And you can't smooth talk me. No. You're not falling for it. I'm like, you're so full of shit. And please do go somewhere. Like don't try to smooth talk me. We didn't have enough time in the podcast to kind of tell the entire story. But if you want to listen to the full story from the beginning all the way

till the end, there's a video on YouTube, the one that I talked about that Lindsay sent me. And if you search Shane Dawson and Brittany Louise Taylor, it'll come up on YouTube. And there's more details. And it's the longer version of what she told us on the podcast. And unfortunately, I guess I would have liked to have known more information than even what was in the YouTube.

But I guess because of legal reasons and stuff, she can't, you know, give some of that information. So I wonder why I don't know. I just wonder how he was allowed to join the military. Me too. Like you can't trust somebody like that. So how are they going to? Well, it makes me feel like our system's flawed, you know, like in a lot of ways

because for this to have all gone on and for him to still be able to join. And did you notice how she said like if his name is even Milo's or whatever? Milo's Milo's like, how do you not know after you've gone to court? Because maybe you can change your name when you come to a new country. I don't know. Maybe. I mean, it's just all bizarre to me. I feel like she gave him so many chances over and over again,

and it makes me wonder if anybody who is listening, if you've ever been in a situation like this or maybe not to this extreme, but been in a relationship where you see all the red flags, people pointed out to you and you still give them chance after chance after chance. No, this is a safety thing. Yeah. Like they could have kidnapped her son. Yeah.

It made me think that all of the things that she said to me sounded like grooming. Like she was being groomed to be like a slave or something, or like her son was going to get trafficked, or maybe they were both going to get trafficked, I don't know. But that's what made it seem like to me. That's what I thought it was. Yeah. Because she kept saying how the mother-in-law kept talking about how the baby was flawless.

And I mean, obviously... I didn't get a chance to ask her what she has planned for the future to tell her son. Well, I know that she changed her son's name legally. I knew that. But I almost don't understand that too, because if they kind of assumed new identities, but he still has the right to come around a few months, I don't know what the point would be to change your identity.

Well, I also don't understand the point of him being in the U.S. Army. That really bothers me. It really bothers me too. Maybe if anybody is in the Army that's listening, can you please explain like... Like, do they not know this whole backstory? Why would they let him do that? Don't they do like background checks on people? Maybe he's so...

Maybe he changed his name again. Yeah, maybe he's so slick that he cheated the government too. It's just a wild story. I just don't think that I would ever believe somebody that I had been like paying their rent for six months or whatever, that I'm going to look at houses in Malibu. They were like eight and nine million dollar homes. Yeah, if I've been paying their rent for six months, that's pretty much a history. Like, you're not just gonna all of a sudden run into eight million dollars.

Well, how does a banker steal eight million or how much money did he have? I forget how much money it was, but it was like a significant amount of money. You don't get away with stealing that much money these days. Like, that's just like not a thing. No. So, as I heard her side of the story like talking to her and also watching the YouTube video, it made me feel like a situation in some ways similar to the Janelle and David situation. Yeah.

I mean, now that you say that, I definitely think both Brittany and... Not like trafficking or anything like that. No, but like Brittany and Janelle were both, they're very naive and I feel like more, they were like easily manipulated and naive and just kind of like more likely to, I guess, like ignore red flags and kind of see past them and hope that it still works, which in a lot of aspects is like me in past relationships that I've been in. And you just know that they're not a good fit, but you stay anyway. But I guess my question since I haven't been in those situations would be,

what are you holding out hope that this person is going to change or are you very aware that this person is like a flawed individual character wise? Yeah. I think a lot of it boils down to self-esteem, right? So, you know, unfortunately, you know, I've been not having self-esteem. You can't sit here and tell me that Janelle has self-esteem to put up with that stuff. And, you know, maybe Brittany felt the same way. This was the first person that she had ever been with. So, it's, I don't know how to describe it.

Right. And I think too, what was very scary since you hit on that point to me was the fact of the lack of sex education. Because I think, did you notice how she said that certain things like you learn in school or whatever, but it wasn't enough for her to kind of be prepared for a real actual like sexual relationship. Right. About like the birth control and how he was able to like convince her that, you know, it's hard for even too healthy people to get pregnant. Which is true.

And I mean, that is true. And I do get that to an extent, but I think back on sex education in school and they didn't really teach you anything. I don't know if it's like state mandated that they have to, you know, teach some certain things like sex education, but nothing that like happens in real life. I feel like I learned. I remember them going over like STEs, but I don't, I didn't even know what it was like what actually happened. Right. And that you need to, there's fluids that come out and this creates a baby.

That's not what I learned in the sixth grade. Right. It was like, if you have sex, you'll get this disease. Like the mean girls. And you're like, wait a minute, how does this happen? Like what is sex? If you have sex, you'll get gonorrhea and die. That's horrible.

But yeah, that's basically what I remember. Like I don't remember them like really explaining in sex ed. It wasn't until it was too late. Right. And I think that she was like one year old before she had sex for the first time. So, yeah. That's so wild. The whole, the whole story is so crazy.

It's very wild. Yeah. I think one big moral of the story is to trust yourself. And you know, I think a lot of times we second guess our, our instincts, but when you look back on everything and hindsight is 2020, you know that your gut instinct is always right. So, you know, don't second guess it. I always, I'm a second guesser about everything. Like I think the first thing, but I always think worst case scenario. And I normally go with that.

So I don't know if that's a flaw for me because I'm a pessimist or basically in situations like this, people are chameleons and you have to be a little bit pessimistic and not so realistic. I think pessimistic, pessimistic, whatever. I'm a pessimist. Yeah, basically. Yeah. So that was a really complex story. And like we said, go on YouTube if you want to watch the full thing in from start to finish. You know, glad that we got her on the podcast and I guess we'll see what's next.

If you guys also would like to read her book, she wrote a book in December of 2018 called a sucky love story. I'm sure that you can find it on Amazon or wherever. Thank you guys for listening. We hope that this brought some type of awareness to just be careful out there. Live chameleons guys. So I think that's all we have time for this week. If you guys have not followed us on at coffee combos podcast on Instagram, you can follow us over there. And if you have not subscribed to the podcast, you can do that by searching the purple podcast app on your iPhone typing in coffee combos, click subscribe, click the fifth star and leave us a written review. We hope you guys have a great week and we'll talk to you soon. See ya.

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