Coffee Convos with Kail Lowry and Lindsie Chrisley - A Little Rage Bait & A Lot of Truth

Episode Date: April 23, 2026

Disclaimer: this episode was recorded before recent events have transpired. I am so grateful for your understanding and support Love, LindsieCC 475: Nothing is off-limits in this episode of Coffee Convos from unfiltered conversations about live show anxiety and the reality of being perceived in real life, to wildly honest takes on confidence, relationships, and what people assume versus what’s actually true, this episode leans all the way into the chaos. A heated debate about thong bikinis turns into a deeper conversation about projection, judgment, and autonomy, while dating standards and financial dynamics bring unexpected self-awareness.Things shift between hilarious and brutally real as Kail and Lindsie test how well they actually know each other, revisit personal habits, and open up about emotional responses, parenting styles, and the ways their past still shows up in the present. And just when you think it can’t get crazier a dating foul play closes things out in the most unforgettable way.Get your Fatherless Behavior Tour Tickets herePlease vote for us in the lifestyle category here!For full videos head to patreon.com/kaillowry To send in your Foul Plays email us at [e-mail] you for checking out our sponsors!RoBody: Find out if you’re covered for free at ro.com/coffeeconvosChime: Join the millions who are already banking fee free today. Head to Chime.com/COFFEE. Zocdoc: Stop putting off those doctors appointments and go to Zocdoc.com/CONVOS to find and instantly book a doctor you love todaySkims: Shop our favorite bras and underwear at SKIMS.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows.Merit: Right now, Merit Beauty is offering our listeners their Signature Makeup Bag with your first order at meritbeauty.com.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey y'all, it's Lindsay. I just wanted to hop on here really quick before the episode starts and let you guys know that this was recorded prior to any recent events. So if you're listening and feel like something isn't being addressed, that's simply because of the timing. I'm going to be taking the time that I need to process some of these things and handle it in the right way. And I really appreciate you guys giving me that space. And I just appreciate your love and support more than you know. It truly means everything to me. I hate gift giving and receiving. Receiving gifts is so weird. What do you say thank you? This is coffee convoes with Kail Lowry and Lindsay Crissly. I really want you to be in your feels, Kail. That does not interest me whatsoever. I feel very attacked by you.

A spirited discussion about motherhood, friendship, family, and life in the public eye. I'm just not with the fakery anymore. There's a fakery bakery around here. Here's Kail and Lindsay. Are we ready? Good morning and welcome back to another episode. of Coffee Convo's podcast. It's me and Kail and our Nitos. And our Nitos. I got the pink glitter one. How you doing? Pretty good. Just sending out tour links to everybody so that they can come on tour

with us like for funsies. I love that. Actually, speaking of tour, I got a couple of text messages privately from people who I've not heard from in forever that was like, hey, I'm going to come to y'all's Atlanta show. And I'm like, can you not? They're like, well, I bought front row seats. So this does make me nervous. It does make me, because I feel like I've done a good job separating. Like I can compartmentalize the way that I say the most unhinged stuff on these podcasts. I can't.

And I go out in the world in the wilderness and I assume that the people that know me in real life do not know what I talk about on these podcasts. So then I think, oh, fuck. you're going to buy tickets to my live show and then I'm going to be face to face with you while I'm saying some off the wall shit about doing anal with my ex. Do you know what I mean? So like in real time on a day to day basis, I just assume these people have no idea what the fuck I'm doing. You know what? Speaking of anal, somebody told me recently, they were like, we're going to get you some like balls like to try to like loosen it up back there. So it'll work.

Probably not. Do you know anything about that? Benoit balls. I do know about Benoit. I also know about anal beads, but I just don't know that that would be a pleasurable experience for me. There was a person on the crew of Chris Lino's Best who walked around with Ben Waw balls and all day, all day long. And I'm like, how tight would that be? Yeah, I probably need that. Pelvic floor, honey, you've got to do Pilates for the pelvic floor. I'm going to try to do Pilates at killer sports. I'll do my best. But the reformers. I'm going to train you. Yeah. Count me in. Um, can we talk about a hill that we would die on? So this has to be an unpopular opinion. It's something that we refuse to budge on. So an example would be, I'm going to get really emotionally charged here in a minute.

And I'm not rage baiting you. I'm going to rage bait everybody and I'm going to flip out. An example would be Pluto is a planet. No, I have a top sheets are useless. That is true. books should be organized by color, not genre or last name. Also no. So what's yours? Like one that's not on this list? Yeah. Because what I have to say, I'm pissed about.

Okay. And I don't know if Ike was rage baiting me or not. So we're about to get into this. And I know Alessandra will back me the fuck up. So Ike, when you fucking hear this, I hope you eat your fucking words. As she's looking directly at the camera. So I'm scrolling on Facebook yesterday. try to follow a bouncing ball. This is a hill I will die on. So try to follow the bouncing ball and circle it back to I'm dying on this hill.

Scrolling on Facebook. And you know how they do like the reels that are just for attention, like you're to grab your attention? Yeah, Kail, I've fell into those reels multiple times, brought up topics on the podcast and you're like, Lindsay, that's rage bait. Yes. Or it's AI, which I also have fallen for. Yeah. Now this specific one, full transparency, full disclosure, I do not know if it was rage bait. I do not know if it. it was AI. All I know is that it sparked a conversation with Ike that sent me into a fucking tunnel vision spiral that I can never get out of. There was this woman who was with a man. I don't know if it was her man. I don't know if it was her brother. I don't give a fuck who it was. It was a man was with her. She was a grown adult in a thong bikini. And if you've ever been to Miami or any other strips where sometimes there are restaurants lining the strip and you come

off the beach and you have to walk through the, you have to walk through the crowds of these tables, right? Right. Regardless of any of that, I am of the opinion that I do not give a single fuck if a grown woman wears a thong bikini or not. I don't give a fuck.

That does not mean that she's looking for attention. That is because she either feels confident. She feels good about herself. It has nothing to do with self-respect. It has nothing to do with wanting attention. Now, does that, is that a one size fits all? No. There are women who look for attention.

just like there are men who look for attention. But this specific video without knowing details, I argued because he was like, oh, she doesn't respect herself and she's just looking for attention. Why are you assuming she's looking for attention? That's projection because you post selfies and you like the attention because you know you look good. So you post selfies or videos of yourself because you know you look good and you're looking for attention. He agreed.

I said, so you're projecting onto that woman who you're saying is only looking for attention. Just because she's in a thong fucking bikini. doesn't mean she's looking for attention. She just wants to fucking feel good about herself. That doesn't, well, that gives us the right to speak to her to, these are the same women that get mad that they're being cat called. Fuck you. Cat called is crazy. You don't get to cat called. You don't even get to look. That doesn't, just because someone is walking by in a thong bikini does not give the right to a man to look. Control your fucking self as a man. Control your eyeballs. Look that way. I don't care. And he's like, well, we can't look. No. Just because.

she's walking around naked, half naked, whatever, does not mean it's a lack of self-respect, does not mean looking for attention, does not mean that it is welcoming eyes and comments. Just because you cannot control your fucking self does not give you the right to look or say anything to me. I would tend to agree with everything that you're saying. I also would say people who have an issue with that and it's involving children, then maybe take your kids to more kid-friendly places. So then you are somewhat controlling the environment that you're putting them in. Like, I had a friend years ago who did wear a thong bikini to my child's

birthday party. And I did feel like that was a little bit inappropriate. That had nothing to do, in my opinion. I don't think she was looking for attention. I think she was just confident in who she was. And she didn't really think about like the surroundings, unfortunately. So to me, I was just like whatever, let's just like who she, but like, on a regular fucking day, I don't give a fuck if you wear a thong bikini, if you don't wear a thong bikini. Is it something that I would necessarily do? No, but I don't care if somebody else who's a grown adult does it. That does not mean she's looking for attention. She just might feel like she looks good herself. You don't need male validation to decide to wear certain things. Let me tell you, and I'm going to find the photo

so that we can post it on Instagram. I went to Great Wolf Lodge one time. This was when I was still married. And that was back in the era where I cared what we all looked like collectively. Now I just really don't give a fuck. But I really cared. And I'm like, okay, I'm going to buy like family matching bathing suits. Like that was the era I was in. So like Will's trunks are going to be the same pattern is like my bathing suit. And Jackson's going to have the same trunks as Will. Okay. So we take a photo at Great Wolf Lodge and some woman passes by me. and says completely inappropriate bathing suit. Mind you, this was a high, like a high, it was a bikini, but it was like the high wasted ones

that like completely basically cover your belly and there's like a small gap between your top. Now, was it cheekier than maybe a one piece probably, but I don't think it was inappropriate at all. Also, there are cheeky one pieces now. For sure. And it's just like, why did you just ruin my time? Because now I just went back into like our little private area and now I'm crying and feel humiliated because I was just trying to be cute with my family and now you're in my business. But I don't understand why she was saying it was so inappropriate because it was a little

cheeky. Yeah, because it was cheeky. Projection. That has to be. That's projection. I remember those days when you did that. And I distinctly remember seeing a. picture of you guys at Great Wolf Lodge or Kalahari, something like that. I don't remember the exact

bathing suit, but like... And yeah, my cheeks were out. I'm not saying that they weren't. But it also wasn't a thong either. No, it was not. But to me, I don't know. And like, why are you hurting my feelings? That's projection. That is projection because she wishes that she could wear that. And I don't mean that in a mean way because she probably doesn't even realize it's projection the same way that Ike doesn't realize that what he did was projection, what he said was projection. That has to be she's not happy with her body. And so she felt like she needed to make you feel like you were inappropriate. Well then, so Ike calls Twizz.

And Twiz is like, oh, if she's with her man, no, she's just with her man. She's doing whatever. But if she's by herself, then yeah, she's looking for attention. What? Like, what if she just wanted to look cute with the girls? I was just so, I said, I'm going to talk about this on my, I'm going to talk shit about you on my podcast. I'm going to talk shit about you on my podcast.

If you're listening, I am sorry. I'm disappointed. In advance. I'm sorry in advance. Y'all, I wear skims every single day and I won't switch to any other place. Okay. They're undergarments, their outfits, they're everything. I wear bras, panties, tank tops, t-shirts, all of it.

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is that a man who's financially stable can love you just as much as one that's not. And I used to say, a man that is financially stable can, love you just as much as one who's not. Yeah, of course. But I used to think, and maybe this was like post-oxic Lindsay? Yeah, and also it was post-divorce of the only person that's going to love me is someone that's going to financially provide? No.

Somebody who can love me is maybe going to love me for what I can bring to the table. and so maybe they have less than or perceived that they have less than what I have. So I was scraping the bottom of the barrel, finding somebody who couldn't bring something to the table. Hold on. So am I tracking correctly when I say, okay, so if you are in the dating pool, you thought that dating someone who couldn't take care of you financially would look to you to take care of them financially. Mm-hmm. But like maybe they could provide more because like finances might not have been their thing. Maybe they could provide more like emotional stability because they would have more time to be able to do that. And you think now that now that I've done it. Yeah. I definitely think that somebody that could provide financial stability or join in providing financial stability can also give me the time and the emotional being. width that I'm looking for. Wait, so you're saying that someone that can provide financially and can't, they can love you the same? Yeah. You're saying they can. They can, but I don't want it

anymore. I don't want the one that can't. I'm not saying I need anything. No, no, of course, of course. I didn't take it that way. But what I've found. I'm just like really trying to pick my own brain about that specifically. I've never been with someone who could provide for me financially. What I found through experience and through experimenting is that, and maybe it can work for other people. I'm just saying for me. I have had multiple situations that once they realize that I financially can do for myself, then it's somewhat of an expectation that I'm going to financially do for all. and it makes me feel like, okay, you're only in this for that, which I thought I was, I was more in it for,

okay, because they can't bring something financially to the table, they can emotionally, like, help, but I realize that because they weren't financially bringing anything to the table and then taking from me that it all almost was like emotionally breaking me down. Because I was like, oh, is that all I'm worth? Does that make sense? Yeah. I built resentment in two relationships post-divorce, and it's like I was looking at that person, and it's like, yes, I have fun with them.

And we get to go on these trips and we get to do this stuff, and they're always there. But then I'm building resentment on the back end because it's like, okay, well, we're only doing these things because I'm providing to do these things. and would we be doing this stuff and having this much fun if I didn't do it. But moving on from that, we are going to go a little more lighthearted on how well do Keel and I actually know each other? When is my birthday? September 17th, 1989. March 14th, 1992.

Yeah. Solid. I'm going to ask you questioned it. She's like, wait a minute. Hold on. If I ordered a pizza, what toppings would I put on it? And would I be able to finish it on my own? A pizza, what toppings would you put on it?

Trying to think the last time that we ordered pizza together would have been at the Webbies. Yeah, last year. Maybe pepperoni. Yeah. I'm not super picky about my pizza toppings. I'll do just cheese. I'll do meat lovers. I'll do pepperoni.

I'll do pineapple and whatever. Oh, see, that's a hill that I will die on. Pineapple does not belong on pizza. It's like a sweet and savory kind of buying. I know, but you have to like sweet and savory, and I don't. I love all. I mean, I like sweet and savory, but not together. But not together.

I'm a big sweet and savory together. Together. Yeah. If you were to order a pizza, I would say, yeah, like maybe pepperoni. A pepperoni pizza. Yeah. Or just like a plain cheese, but I don't really like anything like extravagant.

Me neither. I'm not like a huge, like a, what is it like the everything? Supreme. If there's a Supreme, I'll eat it. But it's not something that I'm going to order on purpose. Does that make sense? The next part of the question is, would I be able to finish it on my own? Three years ago?

Yes, I would. You? No. I can eat a large, and I can have proof of this. I can eat a large domino's thin crust. pepperoni pizza by myself. I think I could eat a dominoes pizza by myself, but like a pizzeria-style pizza, no, no. I also, for some reason, I don't know if it's the Adderall or whatever.

I don't really finish anything at this point. I'm also a picker. So like I want to go to a restaurant and order five things and pick a little bit of everything. See, that drives me nuts. I love it. It's hard because financially it's not great. Yeah. But that's what I do.

Do you have a rule when you go out to eat with your kids? We don't go out to eat. Oh, okay. Fast food only. Oh, fast food only. I mean, the older two I'll bring out to eat. Like we went to Olive Garden before spring break so that Elliott and Lincoln could hang out before spring break. But I don't take Lux and Creed very hit or miss on restaurants.

I have never taken the babies to a restaurant. Still, haven't taken them. Okay, so I have a rule with Jackson that on the weekends, if we go out to a restaurant to eat, then you can get, your meal and a dessert. We're not doing that like through the weekdays. And then for vacation, you can order an appetizer, your entree, and a dessert.

Okay, I like that. But like we're not doing that every single meal all the time. I feel like it sets unrealistic expectations. I would agree. What school subject was I best at? You work best at, what are this, math, science, English, And social studies.

I feel like math is not one. Bitch, can you say I can't add? I was not good at math. Were you good at math? No. I just said math is not it and she got offended. I feel like you could write. So I'm going to say English.

Language arts, for sure. Okay. I could see that because I, for those of you who don't know, there have been times in the past where I have sent things to Lindsay to like help me fine tune a little bit because she's very quick-witted and has a like when she has a minute to actually look at something and type it out. I mean, you're very good with your words, especially in like writing. Don't try to get a skating email for me because I am not the one. Oh, if you want to be read for filth, Lindsay Crissly will do it. And she will do it in the most

professional and English professor type of way. Ooh, it's good. With all due respect, regards Lindsay Lindsay. I'm going to say that Kale was probably best at social studies.

I'm going to be honest. I struggled in school a lot. I was going to say my best subject was PE. Okay. But I don't know about you, but like when you look back at schooling, yeah.

School was not hard for me. I just didn't have the focus and the dedication to like I would take notes so well and then never study them, never look at them at them at home, and then I would fail the tests. So like I was present, but I would not absorb information just from the lecture. And I'm talking about like high school and also college. I would have to actually study the material. And it takes me a long time once I have it. And I said like today, if I was to go back to school, I would be fine. But at that time, I was undiagnosed, unmedicated,

and I was not getting shit done. Like I think I graduated high school with like a 2.5. Oh, so did I. I think mine was. was like less like maybe a two two like mine was I wasn't probably getting into attendance was horrible like it was bad oh no mine also was was very bad but then I made dean's list in college because so did I like folk I don't know if it was just like the just I don't know are we sisters yeah like Todd are you my dad um no I high school I feel like was really hard for me elementary school I think it's just because we moved around a lot. I'm going to contribute to some of that. Now, listen, anything that was like from memory. So remember like times tables test? Like I could do those and like

speed through those. But I also think like back in the 90s, you know how we had to, and they don't do this in school anymore. But it's like you had to write out sentences for memory. Did you all do that? I don't know. Where it's like you have to write such and such like five times. Did y'all do that? Yeah. And so I feel like that helped me, like, memorize. Like the repetition helped. They don't do that anymore in school.

And I'm like, well, what are y'all doing and how are you learning? And is that why all of our kids are medicated? Okay, random. But I've been in this phase of my life where I want to look like I have it all together, even if I absolutely do not. And you guys know that. But let's be honest, the routine sometimes takes longer than five minutes. and if it does, it's not happening.

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That's M-E-R-I-T-Buty.com to get your free signature makeup bag with your first order. Meritbeautcom. All I know is I had enough wits about me in school that I needed C's get degrees. Like that's what I was striving for. When I look back on my high school career, I wish I would have tried harder. Career is crazy. What is it? To say career.

My high school career. My high school career. It's four years in my life. But like I remember going to my friend, different Kristen, not the Kristen that you guys know, but like my friend Kristen from high school, she was just kind of naturally smart. So like she could listen to what the teacher was saying in class and then do the questions at the end of a chapter and then do whatever.

Oh, no, see, that was not me. That was not me. I would have to do it over and over and over again. And I remember the last little bit of ninth grade, this was around the time where my mom had gotten out of rehab and I didn't know about it. I was just kind of floating around like people's houses after school to just go to school and then to finish the year out. I was until I got kicked out, of course. But that end of the year, I had a D or an F in science

and I needed to get it to a C because I was going to then transfer schools. Well, I didn't know that at the time. But I'm like, I just need to get a C. Like, that's all I could strive for. So I remember her helping me study for that one class to bring like a test score up so that I would end it with like either I had an F and I needed a D or I had a D and I needed a C. But like now I look back and I'm like, if I just listened to the teacher one time, I would know. Did you just hear what you said? When I was in ninth grade and my mom left me and I didn't know that she was out of rehab. I was staying at people's help.

You can't learn and your brain cannot function when you're being neglected like that. You have so much else to think about and worry about that your brain cannot go to school and learn. Oh. Well, like now that you say it like that, that makes sense to me. Yeah, that's not your. Because like I think back is I'm like, I'm not, I'm really not dumb. I'm not a naturally smart person. but like if you give me some stuff, I can figure it out.

You know what I mean? Yeah. But then I couldn't. I can tell you I never really struggled in elementary school and middle school. I never really struggled with my mom being absent. I started noticing it when I was in high school. Like when I started my period in like those years. You started your period in high school?

I started my period the summer going into ninth grade. Yeah. Why you were way earlier? I started my. period this summer going into seventh grade. Oh, wow. The last day of school of sixth grade, I started my period. Yeah, I started my, it was 12 years old. Very late. I remember we went to my mom's for a weekend and I actually started my period while I was with my mom. And I was so grateful because I'm like, if not that my dad wasn't capable of being able to handle that, I think it was just a situation

of like, how do I tell my dad I'm bleeding from my vagina and he's going to tell me I cannot use a tampon. Why would he say you can't use a tampon? Oh, girl. That's a long, slippery slope. Like, you're going to lose your virginity if you use a tampon. Wait, so I'm very open about, you know already. I'm open about my period to even my voice, especially because I'm a heavy bleeder. And if I go out in public and I'm bleeding, I would want them to, one, know what to look for, what it is and how to help.

So not too long ago, it was probably like a month ago. So Rio has transitioned from his crib to his toddler bed. I don't know the timeline on that. but he transitioned before this happened. I say that to say, I have to lay with him at night now because he's in an open bed. It's not a crib.

And he wasn't going to sleep. And I said, Rio, I have to go take a shower. I'm bleeding. And I had blood through my clothes and I could tell. Okay, mommy, next time I go to lay with him, he was worried about me needing to leave to go shower. And he looked at me and he said, are you bleeding at your butt?

He's three. See, I love that about your parenting and it's a mark that I think I missed that I wish I could go back. Like if I could say something to go back in my parenting journey to maybe have a conversation about that, it would be periods and being open and honest about those conversations because it's always been something that I hid. But then I take it all the way back to your own childhood. My own childhood, you know. And so I just didn't know what the level of a purpose. appropriateness was for that um okay next question what is my all time favorite movie oh fuck your favorite

movie it's i have it on the tip of my tongue it's with a guy and the guy's name is give me a hint give me the name it's a it's a guy and you said he was so hot and i didn't think he was hot Vince Vaughn oh and Owen Wilson? You think Owen Wilson is hot? No, but his personality is. No, it's a movie, and you said that you loved it, and you thought the main character was so hot. It was like this, like, older white guy, and you were, like, in his youth.

Oh, Hugh Grant. What movie was he in? No. Who, who's the lead of Pretty Woman? Richard Geer. Who does he play? He plays in Pretty Woman? So then it's Pretty Woman.

Or what is it? I do not have an all-time favorite movie. It was a trick question. Oh, fuck. But I know you like Richard Gere. I love Richard Gere. Like if he was, and I know this is going to sound gross, let's give me a little bit of grace. I would sleep with Hugh Grant right now.

Let me Google him because I don't know what he looks like. Hugh Grant or Richard Gere, like absolute hall passes. That's true fatherless behavior. That is fatherless behavior. Hugh Grant, isn't, didn't he play in Hannibal Lecter? Well, I mean, I don't think I want him as Hannibal Lecter. Wait, did he? I might be making that up. No. Liver spots and all. You're gonna have sex with this man.

Not the liver spots. What's liver spots? It's just the first picture. What's liver spots? And why are you going to the first photo? I'm talking 90s Hugh Grant. Get the fuck out of here. If right now at my age from the era that I liked Hugh Grant in. Okay. I was confusing.

Okay, 1990s Hugh Grant. No, Richard Gere was never hot. Yes, he was. What about mustache? Can I ask you for a mustache ride? Oh, okay. I could see this. I could see him in his younger years being a fine young man.

Fine young man. Who did I think was... But an old man, you know, like at the time when, like, if I'm 36 right now and I could transport back to the 90s as a 36-year-old person, absolutely all day long. Yeah, I definitely confused Hugh Grant with whoever's in Hannibal Lecter. I love that. Okay, so top favorite movies for me of all time. Pretty Woman.

Period. Missed Outfire and the breakup. I don't think I've seen the breakup. What's that one? It's with Vince Vaughn and Jennifer Aniston. Oh yeah, I have seen that one. I do like that one. Yeah, it's a goodie.

Mine would be 10 things I hate about you. That's really surprising. Yeah. And then I'm going after that. probably Cinderella. Like Cinderella as in like... The cartoon.

The original. Oh, wow. And then I'm going coach Carter. Coach Carter. Or 12 years of slaves. I'm really surprised that you didn't say the Eminem movie. Oh my God. Eight Mile.

No, let me take this back. Hold up. Hold up. That was the one I was going to answer. Eight Mile. Hold up. Top two. Ten things they hate about you in eight mile.

Then Cinderella. And then. Coach Carter. Love that for you. And 12 years of slaves. Okay. We're going to play a new game. We're going to mix this up.

Okay. We are going to play. This is the instructions of the game. Each player has to write on their whiteboard who they think that the answer aligns with most. And the question has to start with who is. So the first one is who is the better cook? Lindsay is the better cook for sure.

Okay. I will say that. Kale probably makes one mean recipe that I don't even know what it is, but it's like cream, cheese spaghetti. And I feel like it's the only meal that Kail knows how to make. I do bacon chicken ranch, chicken, bacon, alfredo. I can also do good chicken cutlets. Okay.

And I'm working on the mac and cheese recipe. I did teeny from TikTok's recipe again over the weekend. and this one I did I followed it exactly before I kind of like was mostly following it this time I followed it exactly with the Gouda cheese and the paprika I learned very quickly with that recipe after making an entire pan of it that I am not a smoked girly I do not like the flavor of smoked I do not like smoked cheese I do not want it to taste like it belongs with the barbecue chicken I am not a fan oh I love that. Okay, I am really good at following a recipe to a tea. What I'm not good at is making up recipes like as I go. And I think that is the definition of an actual good cook, somebody that can cook

something from not a recipe. I agree. And I'm not that girl. Okay, next one. Who is tidier? Lindsay. Lindsay said me. I said kale. Like tidier where? I just feel like, Okay, I definitely give off like a type A personality, but at any given time, you could go into my laundry room and there's shit everywhere. At any given time, you could go into my bedroom and not organized. My closet, clothes thrown everywhere. I think the average person that listens to this podcast would think that all of my stuff would just be like pristine. And I like it like that, but I am not tidy like that. I wish that I was more tidy than I am.

I am an aspiring type A. Yeah, but aspiring doesn't get us there. Oh, type C. Is that the combination of A and B? Oh, yeah, that's definitely what we all are. All right, y'all, let's take a quick second to talk about Chime. I love Chime so much, and Chime is changing the way that people bank. They offer the most rewarding fee-free banking.

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Okay, next one. Who is more forgetful? Oh, Kail says me and her, and I said Kail. I agree that it's. We've thought that Kales had like Alzheimer's for years. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Okay.

Who is more likely to get lost? Definitely I am more likely to get lost. Alice, Roms Alessandra is shaking her head. Yes. I couldn't. In Ohio, you got lost in the mall. The mall? Listen. First of all, when did you go to the mall? You went to the mall in Ohio? I just get lost everywhere. We were together. I know, but like we weren't. Why did you go to the mall on the way to the venue? I don't know. I don't know. But I can get lost anywhere. Were you buying somewhere? I don't think I was. I think I was just lost.

I was just, I was lost. I could get lost in. What's the saying? Not all that, not all who wanders. Wait. What's the saying? Not all who are law. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Not all who wander are lost. That is me. But I am so bad at geography. Is that what it is? And also like forgetting where I'm at and like what I'm doing. So I could be at Target, for example, and I'll be going down the aisles and I'll be doing really good for a minute and then I black out and it's like what am I here for? Yeah. And like why am I at Target? Okay. Sounds sounds like me. You know? Yeah, for sure. So maybe that is also forgetful. Or Alzheimer's, either one. Or that. But why was I at a mall in Ohio on tour and I was not buying anything?

I was just lost. Okay. Okay. Not all who wander are lost. Who is the better kisser? How would we determine this? Make out. Make out and scissor. Becky and I did it. So I guess it's, we all did that. You all made out? We did make out. On the podcast? No. No. I'm like what happened last week. Oh, at pride? This year? No. It was 2016. 2016. Did Becky think that you were a good kisser? Probably not. Did you ask her? No, because I don't want to hurt my own feelings. Can I ask her? I'm calling Becky. I hope she says she doesn't remember because I'll be really embarrassed. I feel like that would definitely be something that Becky would remember, you know. Hey Becky. I have a question for you. Kail and I are playing a game

at who's better at stuff and we got to the one who is the better kisser. And you and Kail kiss in 2016. Is this correct? That's correct. What do you have to say about Kale's experience with kissing. Like, is she really good at it? Is she, like, mediocre? You're also on air, so. You know, this is going to answer because I quite honestly don't remember the quality of that. Thank you.

Like, why were you all doing that? Great kisser. Thank you. I really appreciate that. Was it a pet kiss or was it like tongue? Becky, We made out with tongue. It was all, it was evidently made way more impactful to Kail's life than it was to yours.

She's like, it was tongue. Like a, yeah, you know. It's like a quick one and done. So the answer to this question is actually Becky, not Lindsay or Kale. We have us got to make out with them and then they get to choose who the best maker out of it. Well, who is it? You're not in the equation because you would be the winner so you can't be in the equation. But who's the target?

We have to find somebody that we're both. mutually attracted to. Okay, love you. Love you, bye. Be good, bye. Be good. Okay, next one, more likely to snooze their alarm. Both of us.

Both of us. She'll said herself, I said me. Yeah. Okay, I have to set multiple alarms. So like five minutes apart and it's not like the snooze feature. So like one snooze might be going off. And then the next one set for like six minutes. later so that's like a minute later that one will start going off and then I'll eventually get up like

the fourth time you know what I mean yes love that more adventurous kale definitely me for sure next one more honest I don't know if that's a fair question because honest is not the way that I'm taking that because I don't think that either of us are liars yeah and if I have you're hearing it first because I did see a TikTok recently. It was like, I think I caught kale in a lie. Oh, I saw that one. It was literally about drinking and the night I conceived Rio. And it's like, if I've ever lied, it was never intentional. It was just that I forgot. And I will always, if I then remember or someone reminds me, I will always go back and be like, oh, I'm so sorry. Like I completely forgot. And then I remembered. You know what I mean? Like, I'm not intentionally lying. So I feel like honest for me when you

read that is more like direct. Like if you ask somebody, I think that's the better question. More direct. Like it's like, okay, how does this outfit look? Who's going to be more honest about it where I might be a little bit of a people pleaser versus like... I'm trying to fake like I'm writing. Because you're like me. Me.

I feel like I am a very direct... And I said that earlier. I literally said like you're... Like it surprises me that the one you were talking about missing flights. Well, it's also like, for example, if Kale got a text from someone and it just like pissed her off she might do one of two things she might not respond to it immediately or ever or she might be like oh like I didn't know that you felt that way like I totally

like that's not what I meant by blah blah blah blah and me my response is two words fuck you yes that is correct like that's the end of the sentence put a period on it. Someone did a TikTok about something and I, Taylor sent it to me and I typed out a whole DM to him. But then I was like, this would not be best if I sent this. So I typed it all out and then I deleted it. So like I'm trying to avoid making those mistakes because I will regret. I do feel like it is a learned behavior to govern yourself and not be responsive, right? Because I do think the natural impulse is to to respond and give somewhat of an immediate answer. But everything does not need an immediate answer.

And I'm saying that as an impulsive person, I will just tell you, fuck you and mean it. And then I will say fuck you and not mean it. I know. And I will ride that forever. Like I've done it to Will before and he's like, I'm not talking to you until you apologize.

And it's like, well, then you're never talking to me again. Because I meant what I said. Sorry is not coming because I thought about what I said before I said it. Therefore, I would be lying if I'm apologizing for something that I'm not fucking sorry for. I love that for you. Okay, who is more emotional? We both said Kail. Yep.

But I think that people, the average person that has like watched us over the years together, if people were debating between Kiel and I, I think they would say I was the more emotional one. It kind of goes with like my aesthetic. I don't feel like I'm really that emotional. Like it takes me a lot. Like I can go through like a full blown breakup, divorce, indictment.

Speaking from experience, Lee? Or, I mean. And never cry. Truly. Where I'm crying every fucking day. Every day. But what is,

what is worse? I took Elliot. I think I'm worse. Because I think crying is so healthy. Yeah, but not probably to my level. Like I took Elliott and, Lincoln to dinner the other night and we started talking about, um, Elliot had to read a book about

the Holocaust. And so we were on the subject of the Holocaust and telling him about the nightingale, all the things. I just start crying in the middle of Olive Garden. I'm crying about the Holocaust. Don't get started with Anne Frank. I'll start crying. That is one area of life that. Lincoln looked at me and he goes, you're about to start crying, aren't you? And then here goes the waterworks. And I'm like, I'm literally in Olive Garden. Can we change the subject? It's so crazy that you say that because Jackson, if I cry, he's only seen me cry like a couple of times in life. And if I cry, he might run to the other room, close the door and call his dad and be like, something's very wrong.

Mom's crying. Because it's not like a normal. But if you cry, it's really serious. Yeah. Like it's really bad. I mean, I almost feel like that is better for the kids. And I'm going to tell you why. My kids see me cry so often that they don't know what is.

like I'm just a highly emotional person, but that doesn't mean that it's not important. Like certain things I'm going to are important and they're worth crying over. And I don't want my kids to ever be like, well, mom was dramatic. And then they don't know what weight to put with certain things. Does that make sense? So like I kind of need to rein back my emotional. I don't know though, because I've, there's like two sides of that coin. I think for Jackson, for him to like literally run to.

another room and possibly like texts his dad and be like hey something's really wrong with mom she's crying because it's so rare that that happens maybe that's not good because i hold so much inside there's not things that there are things that happen that make me want to cry but you don't actually cry okay let's talk about roboty because everyone is talking about glp ones and we all know that they can really help people but if you're interested in this and your overall health journey robot could be a perfect fit. They have GLP-1s for anyone on their weight loss journey with 100% online care, access to clinically proven FDA-approved medications and free insurance checks. They also have side effect management, dosing support, and so much more. And if you just want to try it to check it out

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all for just $45 for your first month and $145 per month thereafter. The row membership fee excludes the cost of GLP1 medication. Go to row.combo's to see if you're eligible for the new GLP1 pill on row. That's RO. dot CO slash coffee combos to get started on row. Go to row.com slash safety for box warning and full safety information about GLP1 medications. Based on a study in non-diabetics with obesity or overweight plus a weight related condition with diet and exercise. So I don't know if it would be more emotionally healthy for him to see me cry more often.

I mean, he's maybe seen me cry a couple of times in his life in 13 years, maybe like five times. That's so interesting. I would be curious to know if my kids understand like when I'm crying over like little shit. Like I go watch a fucking puppy adoption commercial and cry. Like I wonder if they know like mom's just like really in touch or if she's like if they're like no, mom's a crazy person. I would say that's more emotionally in tune. Rio is three and we talk about like I cried about Elliott and the Honor Society.

and I think it was that or it was something else that was good. And Rio was, Mommy, are you crying? And I said they're happy tears. So now he, all it took was at one time. And now he'll be like, are you sad or is it happy tears?

So like he's not sure. So he's like trying to figure it out. Versen Valley don't give a fuck if I'm crying. They do not give one single fuck. Actually, because it happens so often. They're just like, there she goes again.

Creed is hit or miss. Creed's hit or miss. Lux and Lincoln are so in tune with me crying and will like they don't even they don't ask why usually but if they see me crying they know that it's it's something and so they'll put their arm on me they'll hold my hand they won't ask any questions but they'll like like comfort me that's so sweet yeah it's so because you have so many kids you have so many different experiences that I don't have, only have the one to go off of. But like, I can think of something that I went through most recently. And Jackson will, like, if he's at Wills, he might on the phone call

that he has with me, he'll be like, well, is this something you're going to cry about? Oh. And it's almost like, if I tell him, no, it's not something that I'm going to cry about. He knows it's not like that serious. But if he knows that I'm going to cry, then he's like, okay, this is really bad. I think honestly there's like pros and cons to both. For sure. Yeah, I think there's pros and cons to both because like I do worry now that we're talking about it.

Like I don't want them to feel like I'm so fucking dramatic. I was always crying. But see, when I am around Kale, I feel like her emotional state can go from like she's crying and then she snapped out of it and then she's just back to like regular even kale and then sometimes when she's not on her medicine that's like a different kale I feel like I'm pretty even across the board pretty much at all times yeah there was a well obviously my depression which obviously that's like a literal mental illness but there was last year when we were going through the Elijah breakup stuff it was like like that was the only focus there was no other version of kale it

was just that no meds could have fixed that. I don't think. But like now, you know, before we started recording, I, you know, had a little breakdown about something that has nothing to do with work. And then I said that's, I looked at Alessandra and I was like, okay, I'm done crying for the week about that and then try to move on. So it's like I'm trying to rein it in, like just try to like compartmentalize, but it's hard.

But I wonder if people who are more emotionally like you are where they can just like dry the tears and then pick up and move on in the same day because when I cry, it's like, that is my task for the day. Like you're crying and there's no- Like I'm crying and there's no stopping it and it's going to keep coming until it's gone until I literally have no more tears to cry. I think like that specifically, and I said this about Elijah, I'll say it about the situation that you guys know that I'm in right now is like I don't have a choice. Like I have because part of me is like, okay, well, maybe I'm mentally ill because if I can turn my emotions on and off like that, like maybe there's something wrong with me.

But on the flip side of it is like, I don't have time because on any given day, I have to dry my tears up and keep it pushing. I don't have a choice because there's always, I had a mental fucking breakdown at soccer last week and I'm thinking to myself, I need to suck it the fuck up before Lincoln gets back in this car. Like I got to suck this shit up. Yeah. And so because in case the coach comes to talk to me or another parent stops over to my car, like, I'm going to have to suck this the fuck up. And then when I get home, I don't want the rest of the kids asking me why I was crying. So like I kind of just like don't have time. And it's like I have to like let it out because if I don't, something else will, it'll get worse. But then if I do,

I have to like give it a time and then keep it moving. Well, crying, it's an emotional release, right? I think for some people, somebody like me, I can. can just turn my emotions completely off, like a switch. Like it's, but I think that's a trained brain to be able to do that. And it could be from raising. I'm not really sure what it is. Actually, it's something that I'm working through in therapy because I'm like, I do, I said to my therapist when I went, I said, I do not cry. What is wrong with me? Like, it will not come out. Do you disassociate you think? I think so. I just sent somebody a text message before this recording. and I said, I'm traumatized.

And with this mindset and me out of town, this is not good. Please do not contact me. Did I act like like? No. And you haven't said anything until right now where I would have been like, I just texted this person. Yeah. No.

It's like I can just compartmentalize almost. But isn't compartmentalizing more like a man? Yeah. It's more like a male. Yeah. What you hear like in the media or what you read about is like men are very much. known for compartmentalizing and women are known to be way more emotional, like emotionally charged. I feel like Kiel, if we're going off of stereotypes, fits more of like the woman.

And I am much more like a guy in that way. I've actually been told dating in two different scenarios, you literally operate like a man. It's like you can't hurt me. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Don't fucking text me. Don't text me. Don't call me.

Don't see me. Don't drive by my house. That's what Rio says when he's mad. Don't see me. Oh, bless him. Don't see me. That's so sad. Don't see me.

And it's like, you're right here. Done being perceived. Okay, I need to ask this question now that it's at the tip of my tongue. If you're going through something relationally with somebody, can you just shut it off and be like, don't talk to me. I've got too much to do. Or are you like the high. hyper fixated. Like I need to focus on this right now and I need to fix it.

I need to fix it right now. See, I am not. And do not in your whole fucking life say, we need to talk when you get home. If you're not going to tell me right the fuck now, we can just talk when we get home. You don't need to announce it. Tell me now or I'm going to throw up. Tell me right now or I will throw up on this phone. See, I am the exact opposite.

It's like if something has happened and there needs to be a conversation, I need about 24 hours to process that. I might possibly be a slow processor, but I need time to process that before I even get to the conversation. And by the time that I get to the conversation, you're probably not going to like what comes out of my mouth, but I'm still going to say it. Well, I run through every scenario in my mind in like 24 hours of, is this even worth addressing?

And then if I deem that it's not worth addressing, I'm not having a conversation. I'm not having a conversation about it. Have a conversation with yourself. Why do we get to this point that you feel that we need to have the conversation? And I don't feel that we need to have the conversation. Yeah. Just tell me right now. If you can't tell me right now, don't tell me we need to talk later.

You're like, actually don't tell me at all. Like, if we need to talk later, just talk to me later. But it gives you bubble guts, right? Yes. It gives you, yeah. Why do you need to tell me that? You know I'm anxiety. And it's like in therapy, we learn like, you,

your perception is nobody's business or like your feelings are nobody else's business or like that's a you problem because they told you you need to talk and how your emotions towards that only you can control it. Okay. Well, my boundary though is do not because I can't function. That is something that I can't undo right now and I won't be able to undo in the foreseeable future. So do not do that to me. And that's my boundary. Like cool. You're not you can't manage my emotions about it. but like you can control whether or not you send that text. And I'm asking you, do not send me a text like that. I mean, I think that's fair.

I'm not saying that it's not fair. I'm just saying. Like you can handle it better than I can. Like if you sent me a text message when I get home and you're like, hey, we really need to talk about something. I would be like, okay, let me know in the next couple of days when we can talk. And you're like, no, I need to call right now. Or like whenever I had to talk to Madison, I was like, hey, like you're not in trouble at all. I just want to run through some things with you, but like you're not in trouble.

I just need to go over X, Y, and Z. Yeah. That's fine. But like if someone comes to me and it's like, hey, Kail, I don't, we don't need to talk right this second, but I wanted to talk to you about your refrigerator's not working. Okay, cool. Thank you. And see. But if you're like, hey, we have a big problem.

We need to talk. And it's literally my refrigerator. I'm shitting my brains out in the fucking Wawa bathroom. Fuck off. I mean, I get the perspective. Like, I get it. And I do feel like I used to be. be a little bit like that.

But it is not uncommon for me in a relationship for some shit to happen, argument, disagreement, whatever. And I am the person that's like, I am not talking about it right now. I have this on my schedule today. You are not fucking inconveniencing me. You have pissed me off. And there is going to be no conversation until I have time to process what I need to say. Situational.

If it's something I did wrong, I need to know right now. If it's something they did wrong, no hold bar. Anything goes at that point because now you're going to wait until I'm ready. But if it's something that I did wrong or I don't know, like a guilty conscience about something. No, now we need to figure it out now. Okay.

Do you know what I mean? Yeah, I can see that. Like if I text me right now, hey, I need to talk to you when I get home. No, the fuck you don't. You need to call me right now. You need to call me right now. I'm stopping the recording. Oh, my God.

And she would. And me, I'm over here sending a text. text like do not fucking contact me do not fucking contact me not the time or the place do not contact me okay next one who is more likely to cheat on a board game did you change your answer that's cheating okay she put luck i put kale i wouldn't cheat on a board game i feel like kale would cheat on a board game if it meant unless it's becky that's the only time that i would cheat on a board game is if it's becky because because you just hate losing to her so bad. Yes. And I don't know what it is. I think it's because I know that I'm going to lose.

Yeah. Because she's so competitive and she's so good at anything like competitive. Yeah. But I don't think like if it was with you, I wouldn't cheat with you. And if it was like my kids or something, I'm not going to cheat. Lux is the cheater and the family on board games. Okay. So one time we were playing board game. Jackson's like, oh yeah, we're going to play payday. Well, he was like hiding cards and money in his, in his like, in his like, draw, like, what, waistband? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, of his stuff. And I kept seeing him walk away and going towards the refrigerator.

I was getting water. And when I tell you, nothing pisses me off more than someone trying to cheat on something. Like, if I catch you trying to cheat or manipulate or you fucking lie to me, one single time, I don't care what it is. If I asked you, Kail, did you touch my Nido? And you said, where is it? It's right here. But if I said, kill, did you touch my Nito?

And I watched you do it and you say, no, I don't care if you didn't remember. You just lied to me. Like, literally do not lie to me. I hate it. I told Jackson, I was like, you are now restricted from family game night. I cannot believe that you would do something like that. That is so horrible. What if someone hears this story way down the line?

They're going to think that you cannot be fair with money. They think that you cannot play fair at life. Your boss when you grow up is going to find out about this and they're not going to trust you and hire you to do the job. This is terrible. And you have really disappointed your family members. What did he say? He said, it's not that serious.

It's just a board game and I wanted to win. And I said, what you wanted to do was cheat. And I don't have thieves in this house. do you understand? I said you get no snacks. You have to go and brush your teeth. You need to get in the bed. There is no TV.

Do not play with any toys. Do not open your eyes. Just because he cheated on a board game? On a board game. I take that stuff so seriously. Because also, what if you were in sports and like you lied to a referee or like what if you were playing a game at school and I've allowed you to get by with that at home and then you do that and embarrass yourself at school.

No, I'm going to embarrass you at home so that that will live with you for forever. And then I would keep going by this room and I was like, have you thought about what you did? Have you thought about the depths of your, what was I going to say? What is it? Deception, the depths of your deception. No, it did. It is. And I told him, I went in there, sat down on his bed after I got cooled off.

And I said, unfortunately, son, I think this is going to have to be something that we call your dad about because it's not something that I can keep in this house. Because, you know, you could lose a job over this one day. And what did he say? This would be horrible. He was like, please don't call my dad. I'm like, this is not funny. But Jackson, I'm laughing. but also.

But it also is funny. You see that United States map right there? Yeah, I can't read it. Becky and I did them here at the content house, like on a video. But we went home and I made the kids do it and Lincoln was using his Apple Watch and I caught him. But I didn't tell him I caught him. Like he doesn't know that I know. Oh, sometimes speaking of cheating and kids using like chat GPT and stuff, sometimes I will see Jackson doing something for school.

and I see him taking a picture of his laptop screen. And I'm like, I know what you're doing. Do you remember the board game? Do you remember the depths of your deception at Family Game Night, Jackson? Do you remember? And then the next time that he wanted to play Family Game Night, he was like, let me keep the score. I said, oh, do you remember that day that you cheated at payday? First of all, what the fuck is Payday?

And I told him some board game. And I told him next time it was like a snow day and he wanted to play like this sticky tick-tac toe game. And I said, you can get that game out. That's fine. But just know I'm watching. I'm watching you go to the fridge to get your water. Water.

Water. My snack. You will be let go from your job. Everyone's going to find out. And then I'm not lying as a reference. This behavior is going to ruin your entire career that you don't have. your career that you don't have you won't be able to get into college don't piss me off this is the scandal of aunt becky the what's the one from full house where she gets oh yeah that is what college

admission scandal that's going to be jackson 1,000 percent wait okay so let me tell you apparently let me tell you another parenting thing that i did and i hope that i found out that he and will possibly listen to coffee combos podcast so if you guys are listening shout out to y'all hope you're having fun on your cruise so i have been having a problem with finding like Sprite cans and Coke cans in Jackson's room. And it's like, I know that I've put you to bed with water and the teeth were brushed. You know, like I'm not that much of a degenerate, right? Right.

You've been put to bed. The fans are on. Like the dehumidifiers on. The TV is on with the timer. Like everything is in place, including you. Why am I coming in there? and I'm finding freeze, dried skittles and crumbs all over the bed and soda cans everywhere. In the middle of the night?

Well, I will see it in the morning when I go get him up. No, but like that means that he's doing it in the night. He was getting up, roaming. Yeah. And so I looked at him one day. Is he starving during the day? No. Like, are you starving him?

No. Well, you told him he couldn't have snacks. For game night. Yeah, but he might have been hungry. That wasn't on game night. This has been a habitual offense. Okay. and we don't need soda at after 10 o'clock at night.

I'm sorry, we just don't. And I also know that you have been fed three squares. You have had snacks. Squares. You have had snacks and you are very well hydrated. So there is no reason for that in said bedroom. Right. So I walk in there one morning and I see all this shit laying around and I'd let it happen

a couple days and I never said anything. But I just let him see my eyes. We're like tracking towards that way. way. I see it, but like, I'm not going to say anything. Well, then on the third day that I went in there, I saw it. And I said, where is this from? He said, what? I said, your drinks, your freeze, dried skittles. Where did that come from? Because the last time I saw it, it was in the pantry. Well, I just felt like I, I said, uh, uh, no, I didn't, you didn't feel like anything. What you were doing, you didn't feel like anything. You were roaming is what you were doing. You were roaming.

you were roaming around this house. So I waited until the next week. He comes back home and he sees that the new alarm systems like plugged up. I tell him that I have cameras everywhere in the house. I don't. I lied. Don't let him hear this podcast. I'm like,

Will please shut it off at this point? I told him that I have an alarm system that detects motion for certain hours of the night. No, I'm going to do the same thing when I get home. And that when I press those buttons, that we have a certain amount of time that we have to get to our rooms and it will go off. It's like those lasers where it's like

you have to like go over and under them. It's like that. It'll go off at 7 a.m. So it will stop detecting motion at 7 a.m. But any time before that, it's detecting motion. And he's like, why would you do that? That's crazy. I said, oh, I know it's crazy,

but what's crazier is a 13-year-old eating freeze-dried skittles and drinking two sodas in the middle of the night. So now I don't have to worry about it. To this point, like lying to our kids. Yeah. I told Creed. What's too far?

Nothing. Me. Nothing is too far at this point. I told Creed, I said, you know, when you lie, unfortunately, worms come out your butt. Oh. I don't know why. It was the first thing I came up with. Why?

Why? Did you say that? So he freaks out, right? Oh, my gosh. Just wait. He looks at me in the shower and he says, how come when I've been lying to you worms haven't been coming out my butt? And I'm like, Creed, if you thought worms were going to come out in your butt, why are you lying to me?

Yeah. And he's lying about dumb shit. Like what? Well, see, that's how you create like a pathological liar when they start lying about dumb shit, you know? Well, it's the same song and dance. Are you wearing Lux's underwear? Are you wearing your own? You know?

And so like I think that's probably like the subconscious reason I said worms will come out your butt. Because like if you're wearing Lux's underwear, now you're going to ruin his underwear because the worms are going to come out your butt. You know? But so now he knows like there's no like he's five and he barely believed my like reason for why he shouldn't lie. Well that one was crazy. Worms coming out of your butt is insane. I mean, at least think it through. Like.

Desperate? Shitting is going to happen. And if worms don't come out, you're done. Yeah, worms didn't come out. Like parenting is over for you. But, like, I didn't know he was lying to me either. So, like, that's a problem. Oh, I know when everybody's lying to me before I ask, right?

Like, if I ask a question and everybody in my life knows this, if I ask a question, it is because I already know the answer to it. Like, I am not wasting my time asking you something that I can find the answer on my own. You know you are trapped. So you might as well. go ahead and tell me wait keel should go and get like some worms from the gas station you know like the crawlers and put them in the toilet and be like creed you've been lying like who pooped there like like who pooped there no i'm just going to blame creed right off rib because he's the one that said he's

been lying he admitted to lying he's like so i'm going to be like you went to your dads and all the worms came back can you imagine can you video it no i will literally do that i love this idea just go I could do some crawlers, girl. I'm just going to... Hey, I, can you bring some worms home? Okay. On that note, we have foul play. Hi, Kitties.

I was on a second date with a guy who I really liked. On our first date, he was saying how much he loved a girl and a dress and how he loves women to cook for him. Okay, he's immediately off the date. Yep.

Immediately, I'm not interested. I decided to invite him over to my house. I put on a fancy dress, curled my hair, pinned up the front with a couple of bobby pins, secured it with a lot of hairspray. When he arrived, I told him,

was making homemade chicken Alfredo to really impress him, I decided to show off my grilling skills and grill up the chicken breasts. Good for you, girlfriend. The amount of effort that's just been said in these three sentences is way more than I've ever done my entire life. I'm not pinning my fucking hair in place and standing barefoot in the fucking kitchen to cook chicken Alfredo. Chicken Alfredo, that's crazy. Like, and also to do chicken Alfredo on the grill. Like, I don't have words for that. She says, we went outside and I went to light up the grill. I turn on the LP, turn down all four burners, and press the ignite button. Nothing happens, so I keep pressing the ignite button, but again, nothing happens.

My date begins to say, I think we should shut it off. I stick my head into the grill. Oh. Why didn't he just help her turn it on? How about that? I stick my head into the grill to get a closer look, push the ignite button, and boom, the grill. Grill blows up in my face. To my horror, I realized that my hair is on fire, quickly began patting it out with my hands to put it out.

I look at my date and say, how bad is it? His eyes say all, his eyes said it all. He had a completely horrified look on his face. He just says, just go to the bathroom. I excuse myself to the bathroom and to my horror, every single hair on my face was gone. No eyebrows, no eyelashes. And where every hair follicle was located was burned into a little black ball. I noticed my hairline was also singed. And when I put, when I pulled the bobby pens, out of the entire section. Did you guys make this up? No. I've never heard. I feel so bad and I feel horrible. Even worse that I'm laughing at her pain.

Like this is something that she probably struggled with for weeks. Weeks. Yeah. You said weeks. Her hair was were singed off. That's not growing back in weeks. Her facial hair. Like your eyebrows.

Your eyebrows would not grow back in weeks. My grandmother waxed my eyebrows in the night. 90s and one still fucked up. I'm so pissed at that guy for not helping her. I think we should turn it off. Fuck you and light the fucking grill. Fuck off. She says when I pulled the Bobby Pins out,

the entire section fell into this. Oh, no. No. I walked out of the bathroom and my date says, why don't you just take a shower? You smelled like a burn body. After showering, he was sweet enough. Oh, now he's sweet enough.

No, he belongs in hell. He was sweet enough to have dinner with me, but after this day, I never saw him again. This bitch burned her whole fucking facial hairs off. No. He had dinner with me, but I never saw him again. She said, I have never been more mortified, but it gives me a good laugh to this day. I hope it gives you guys a good laugh as well. Love the podcast.

You guys keep me occupied on long drives. Love Emily. I love Emily so much, and I'm so sorry that happened to you. We should have cut it off at the point that he tried to, like, he should have said, Hey, thank you so much for cooking. I'm offended. I'm going to go turn the grill on for you. The fact that he watched her struggle and then said, I think we should turn it off. It's giving like housewife.

It is. And it's giving like trad wife. Yeah. But also like the fact. Which is fine. I'm still stuck on the fact that he didn't help her with the grill. As manly as you are, you didn't have the common gentleman courtesy to help her turn on the fucking grill. Actually, what I've noticed, this might be a contribution.

take, but what I've noticed is... Men don't know how to do shit. No. Men who want a woman like this, they don't know how to do that stuff. Men who do know how to do it don't really care to have to have a woman like this. Could you imagine if I went and stuck my head into a grill with a man standing there and that thing ignited all over my face, brought my fucking eyebrows and my eyelashes and my whole hair to the...

My bobby pins like were singed. Could you imagine? I think you can simply cook the grill the chicken for me. So are we saying that that is a blue job? I'm saying that I would sue him for emotional distress. She deserved better. And on that note, we've got to go film TikToks to entertain you guys. Join us on the fatherless behavior tour this summer.

Tickets at kaleowry.com. Thank you for always supporting our show. Please subscribe and review on the Apple Podcast app. Follow and rate on Spotify or listen wherever you get your pods. for our latest merch, visit coffeeconvospodcast.com to shop. Full video episodes are available on Kail's Patreon at patreon.com slash kale-laury. Please don't forget to follow us on Instagram and join our Facebook group to connect with us and our community.

We hope you guys have a great week and we'll talk to you soon. See ya. Okay, guys, we're back. You asked for it and we're delivering. Killer is going on tour. We're super excited for the fatherless behavior tour, 23 cities, three countries, all in one summer. and you guys can check out tour dates and see if we're coming to a city near you

on kale lowry.com. And if you want early access to information and announcements, head over to Patreon because you might get it before everyone else. TV shows, movies like Pineapple Express, the entire Star Trek film franchise, and Gladiator, and TV shows like Survivor, SpongeBob SquarePants, the fairly odd parents and ghosts,

Pluto TV is always free. Hazzam! Pluto TV, stream now, pay never. Hey, quick question. Why do you keep thinking you can change that man? I mean, you are not his mother. Let someone else change that poopy diaper and focus on yourself. Hi, everyone.

I'm Vila Benson, your Russian vix sister, and an almost adulting Vila Benson. I give you that tough love, dating advice, and reality checks that you didn't ask for, but you absolutely need. We talk relationships, confidence, mental health, boundaries, and how to finally stop settling for crumbs. You deserve better, babe, and it starts with me. So new episodes every Thursday, come hang out with me, follow rate and review almost adulting wherever you get your podcast.