Coffee Convos with Kail Lowry and Lindsie Chrisley - Catching Cheaters & Popping Cherries

Episode Date: April 6, 2023

CC278: Kail makes good on her promise of sharing the ways she was able to catch a cheater, Lindsie explains why she believes a cheater IS NOT always a cheater. Today's listener topics ask if couples should "be allowed" to take separate vacations and what are some Wifey Things that you shouldn't have done for your boyfriend? Kail and Lindsie deep dive into their experiences.As we all know, Kail has had some high conflict coparenting that she has been struggling with these past few months... She explains her recent frustrations in final say and Lindsie shares what has worked for her in her parenting plan. Lastly for Foul Play, hotels are disgusting, duh, and popping cherries in cringey ways that has Lindsie flabbergasted.  Check out our Instagram @coffeeconvospodcast for more!  Thank you to our sponsors!Better Help: This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/coffee today to get 10% off your first monthCare/of: Visit TakeCareOf.com and enter code COFFEE50 for 50% off your first orderKiwico: Get 50% off your first month on ANY crate line at kiwico.com/COFFEEProgressive: Visit progressive.com to learn moreTrailmix Games: Download Love & Pies for free at the App Store or Google PlayTreehut: Shop Tree Hut at Ulta, Target, and Walmart, online and in-store. Check out treehutshea.com/podcast for more details 

I hate gift giving and receiving receiving gifts is so weird. What do you say? Thank you? This is coffee convos with Kale Lowry and Lindsay Chrisley. I really want you to be in your feels Kale That does not interest me whatsoever. I feel very attacked by you a spirited discussion about motherhood friendship Family and life in the public eye. I'm just not with the fakery anymore. There's a fakery bakery around here Here's Kale and Lindsay. I I just sneezed as soon as I was accepting you into the recording and Kristen was like, oh, I love that No, just a regular one. I just have regular sneezes. Are we on the air? We're on the air. Good morning. Oh, Wow, I wish everybody saw what I just saw a coke the coke in the can

Love it. That tells me that you were not prepared for today. I absolutely was not I don't have any water here. The only thing I have in the office fridge is soda My god, I want to tell you that the amount of shit that I just got accomplished in 15 minutes So that I was only five minutes late to this is Incredible honestly incredible Eating besides the fact that I burned this English muffin. It's normally pretty good But like this is gonna be like a little bit. Is it called ASMR? Listen. Yes. Oh People are gonna love that. I know they're gonna love it. That's why I can't eat it

But it's so good. I eat this almost every day. If I don't eat a meal, I eat this English muffins are disgusting. There's no flavor to them. They are foul. They're like eating cardboard That's a lie. No, like that's categorically false I just like don't like that. You said that and also what's the difference in an English muffin and bread like bread has? English muffin has better texture to me than bread. I Don't have any tissues here and my nose is running also and So if y'all see me wipe my nose with my sleeve, sorry about it No bread is fluffy and delicious and English muffin is like stale bread like that's what it reminds me of

No, like you just didn't have it the right way before I mean, it's not the right way, but eggs benedict. No, I hate eggs benedict Because isn't that like a poached egg? Yeah. Yeah, I hate poached. Well, do we runny eggs like regular runny eggs? Yeah, I call them drippy, but eggs. Um, was it on here that I was talking about? Egg in a hole or egg in a basket What where you talking about? Oh, what where you take a piece of? Julie's dad used to do this for us when we were kids all the time. So shout out Papa Harvey

He would like cut I thought he invented it, but I don't think he did. I think that I just like thought it when I was a kid Other people do do it, but it's where you take like a piece of bread and then you put it like in your skillet with butter And then you crack your egg It you make a hole like out of the center of your bread like a lot of people use like a cookie cutter So you have a hole. Okay, and then you crack your egg in that hole So it kind of like keeps it uniform Okay, then you cook the egg and then you have the other little piece of like bread that you cut out You put it down in your pan and get it, you know, like with butter on it

And then you can put jelly on that one and then you have like an egg in a hole with your toes You've never done this with your kids. No, I've never no I've never even heard of this So I'm gonna need you. It sounds cute. It sounds like a fun time. I'm gonna need you to make it like I'm gonna need you to make it immediately I've never been able to successfully make runny eggs or drippy eggs by myself Excuse me. I love a bit drippy egg like when you can like slop up the um Like drippiness with your toast

Oh, that's what I typically like But I've been slowing down on the eggs since I found out that I'm allergic to egg whites Wait, what? Who's allergic to egg whites? Me. That's alarming. Um, that's very alarming. I'm like, I can't eat bread gluten egg whites Chicken like all the things that I would normally like normal people would have in like a meal plan to like eat healthy I can't have it or I'm not supposed to I I do but I'm not supposed to I just hate that for you um Apologies for anybody who is seeing this video

In advance, but like after the fact also that my titties are just out This is like the best tank top ever though. Look at it. They look good. It almost looks like the one I have on This this is like the best and um, can we talk about? Where is that from? Uh amazon so is mine. Yeah We need to be linking this shit up because whoever does not have these like immediately needs to add it to their closet I wonder if we have the same ones. Is your coming to four pack Mine came in a two pack specifically because I wanted to try the two before I wanted the four

I wonder if we're wearing the same one wait. Are we different purchasers in that way? Like you'll buy if it seems like a good deal like you'll buy the bigger pack Just like in case you like it. I didn't even think to buy the two pack I bought these to go to thailand and I was like, um, it's a four pack and I just assumed it was the same kind of like material or whatever as Other ones that I bought so I didn't even think to buy the two pack I just went for the four pack And I never tried them. So the fact that you just said you wanted to try the two pack before you got the four pack

Is something that I should be doing So thank you for that. Um, I think I'm gonna become a consignment store person now I think I'm gonna start selling my stuff on posh mark. I'm not even kidding I think no like because I feel like we just waste so much and you need to get the fuck out of my head because I literally passed A thrift shop when I was taking the kids to this about this jumping place the other day And my friend Emily was with me. She has four kids I had four kids and we're walking by the thrift shop and I said, I'm actually going to go in there

Because there was so much stuff. I didn't go in. I'm gonna go in We should do that. Let me tell you what my nanny does like And I feel like maybe I'm becoming her as I start aging um When we moved to Atlanta, she would go to the goodwill like because They had like really nice stuff at this one And she would buy like all this

shit And it's like, why do you need? Oh like beer steins or something? Is that what they're called? Steins like a beer like a stein Isn't that elaborate like what is it for? um I don't know. I think it like happens in another country or something like that What the fuck are you talking about? It's like something that you like put beer in okay, okay, and

And she would like go and buy all of these Collectibles or she thought like antique yes, and she would put them in her um Little like cabinet that had like clear glasses and stuff. Yeah like a china cabinet sort of thing a china cabinet a china cabinet Yeah, she put it in there and would like put this stuff on display and i'm like you got this at goodwill Like why are you trying to act like this is like a family heirloom like it's just weird Is that an old is that like um, what generation are our grandparents because my grandmother carol gene? carol gene cj. She would do stuff like like yard sales

um garage sales antique shops like all of that and she would collect like i mean her house was I loved her house and the way that she decorated it and stuff but like Also same like she would display these things that she got and she would call them antiques But like were they actually antiques because I can't imagine that they would sell antiques at a fucking yard sale first of all They're not antiques and I call my nanny calliope because that bitch has a little of something of everything What is calliope? I don't know it's just like an I heard this name like growing up and I feel like it's just somebody who just like has a bunch of like shit like

They're just like eclectic and so I would go to my grandparents house and they would just have like all this shit like sitting out and i'm just like Why what is this why this is a dust collector? and I think it turned me off from having like knickknacks around and My dad said that He would like have someone go over and like pack up her stuff Like that she definitely didn't need that she bought a goodwill and take it back to goodwill and then The bitch would go and repurchase stuff that she already had did she know that she like she was like she knew

I don't think she knew my grandmother had rest in peace carol gene Um, she had like when you first walked into her home like her first of all my grandparents built it They were together for like 50 years They built this house. I mean you first walk in the front door. They had And again, like it was it was decorated very nicely But like the church pews were the bench was the bench where you walk into the house And there's like a bench that you sit on and that was like old church pews

So you immediately felt bad for committing crimes in their home? I would never commit a crime in my grandparents home. That was those they were like My ride or dies. I loved them. Um, they just owned me when I was 14, but nonetheless He disowned you Well, I mean, you know Susie and everything else they want to believe their daughter. I get it. I get it. I get it So like anyway, but I love them so much But yeah, the church pew I actually have one of the benches now and then they have this like

antique ladder Above their kitchen island and it was like Um suspended from the ceiling and it had like pots and pans like dangling from it Oh, she was one of those I can picture her Yes, like antique pots and pans hanging from the antique ladder. I have the ladder now I'm not sure what to do with it, but like whenever My grandfather passed away My uncle let me like go get some stuff from the house

And that was one of the things that I picked. I don't know what to do with it But like because it was in their kitchen. It was such a staple for me I've looked on Pinterest and stuff and I've seen like The way that people like repurposed ladders, but like I'm not farmhouse So I got to find something that works for us. Trust me. I know that we are not farmhouse. I always wonder Like do you ever just like look at real estate and you go on these real estate websites to see houses? Like basically around you just to be nosy to see what they have Yeah, and they're all farmhouse every single one of them like literally everyone and you'll see where they have like their pots and pans and shit like

hanging from Hooks like around their stove or whatever. Yeah, I'm just like, how do those not just become dusty as fuck Maybe they don't use those like maybe those are decoration like my grandparents I just feel like you would need Uh, not an eclectic set but like a matching set if they're gonna be decorative pieces And I certainly wouldn't like are you trying to kill somebody like what if What if the house started shaking and those that shit just like started falling like do people think about this stuff? I don't know. That's a great question. And I don't have the answer

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Go through my ex's phone when he was asleep. This was like in like crazy kale era. This is not I'm not there anymore crazy kale era Go through his phone when he was sleeping and the thing was that he would keep his phone in his shoes on the stairs Or he would keep his phone back up. Why was his phone in his shoes to hide it because he didn't want me to get to it But you knew that was in his shoes Yeah, because at the time one of my girlfriends was living with me and she would see and she would text me Hey, just so you know, he came down and put his phone in his shoes Or like when he got in bed with me

He would take his pants off and like just have his boxers on and his phone would be in his pants pocket So like he thought he was being slick, but like I'm one step ahead of you So like sir, you are not slick Rick. You're not slick at all at all Or he would have all of his message all of his eye messages go to his computer And I'd be like, oh, I need to use your computer and then I'd go through the messages So with the phone thing I wait till he go to sleep And I will go through his phone and that's the other thing I never showed him what cards I had So like I would see him put the password in but I would never act like I cared

I wouldn't be I wouldn't act pressed. I would just keep it in my head. So he'd go to sleep go through his phone and I didn't want him to know what I was doing. So then I would put the phone back Text my friend and say, you know, this person this is what was in the text messages blah, blah, blah, blah So then she would text me From an app like a phone app. Mm-hmm with a random phone number and be like Um Kale So and so is cheating on like I'm with him like I suck this dick. Well, but like she would tell me tell on her

Tell on me Tell on him. Sorry. Tell him him Based on everything that I found in the phone She would text it to me so then I would wake him up and be like look at the text I just got like what the fuck is this and he would admit it every time But my dumb ass my dumb fucking ass never left like I would leave but then we would get back together So it's like if I'm gonna stay I need to shut the fuck up if I want to get back with him I need to shut the fuck up and not go through his phone because at the end of the day

I was gonna get back with him anyway Yeah, I came with all these Apologies and promises and I'll never cheat again and it was a weak moment for me and this that in the third but I Loved him. So I believed him every time and I got back with him. But like it worked every single time So can you tell me You would like call him out on this, right? He would admit it

And then he would be like, I'm so fucking done with you. Yeah And then he would leave or or you would leave like one specific time I left and he followed me home And was like no like like almost in tears crying like begging for me and then at one point on a different occasion He got on his physical knees and was bawling. So obviously I believe that Okay, but that tells you That I'm psychotic Yes, and like also me because there is some type of thrill that is associated with

That type of chasing That if you're not careful, you will just like slip down into a straight up slippery fucking slope Like break your neck never come back. Yeah, and it was like It was just like I think that's kind of part of the cycle, right? It was like the He's fighting for me Where if it was someone else who didn't show that same emotion and didn't fight for me I would be like, see, I knew it. You never loved me all along But but why do they do that? That's what I'm trying to figure out. Like why do

people cheat beg for you back Go through that whole process just to Do it again. I think I think it's real for them to Do maybe some people and I do think there are like serial cheaters and then there are people who fuck up and they're not always a cheater You know, like I don't believe once a cheater always a cheater for some people I think they're serial cheaters and he was one of them. I don't even think that he knows why he does it I

Have two statements to make about this Once a cheater always a cheater. I was just having this conversation last night And I don't think once a cheater always a cheater, but I think once a cheater in a relationship That you've been with that you have cheated on that person or been cheated on by that person That there will always be an aspect of that within that relationship. Yes, I agree with that So I think if you like that relationship is kind of tainted a little bit. Yes. Yes, I agree But I think you can go into something new. Yeah And not cheat agreed. I agree with that

second thing is I don't believe at this point just based off of Lived experience based off experience that I know that you have lived That it has anything to do with what someone looks like. No, it doesn't it doesn't because I mean people hear it all the time Like you could literally have the most gorgeous girlfriend or the most gorgeous wife husband Whatever and they go cheat on you with someone that's bottom of the barrel Not to talk about anyone's looks, but like yeah, they don't care. They don't think it's about looks at all and I um, I saw this tick talk and it was talking about how

If if you have been cheated on by somebody and they come back it's likely because of this um unattainable aspect of you and When they're cheating with somebody they're choosing somebody that they know is like a solid play Say that again It's like a solid play so they can they're cheating on you with someone that they know that they can have and

That person would like be with them even if you won't But they're gonna keep you as long as you'll keep them But they're gonna have that other situation on the back burner So give me an example. So like this person that I was just talking about when he was cheating on me If I was to leave him, he knows that that person would keep would be with him So then why be with me at all? I don't know. I think that's the question that you have to ask the cheater And like what is it? What is it? What is the thrill? Like why are why are you who you are?

Why do you do the things you do when I cheated on? When Jordan it was I mean, I was young. I was 18 But that being said, I feel like I cheated because not because I actually wanted to be with Joe I think it was like we were young. I didn't want him But I didn't want anyone else to have him at that time. You know what I mean? And so there wasn't really a thrill there. It was just more like we call that greedy. Yes. I was greedy immature Selfish. I didn't really care about anyone else's feelings at that time. I know a situation that That you have been in multiple times

I'm scared That you've allowed someone to hang around Who? I'm not going to say that person's name Well, tell me um I don't know what you just said. I don't even know what that was Um, was it like this? Yeah. Oh, okay. Gotcha. Gotcha. Yeah that you could

Yes, like basically one up and use as leverage, which is fucked up But again, it's like you're shitting where you eat. So now Don't fuck with me. Mm-hmm. And you need to be honest about the situation or It's gonna come out like the truth is gonna come out somewhere even if it's not from me You're gonna get caught up We're I mean, we're essentially just like now the new catch-a-cheater Um, I love that for us. So if you guys have any questions about how You want to catch somebody cheating

Just write us and we'll try to help you. Um, can you also tell me about your pregnant cat and why I knew that this was going to become an issue so barn cat is pregnant one of the barn cats and And I don't sleep with I need to know because I have not I've seen one other stray cat in my whole like Existence where I live now And we don't feed any of the other cats like the only cats I feed are like barn cat and like my indoor cats and I don't know. I've never seen another cat out there. Well, like maybe like six ish weeks ago Um, couldn't find barn cat like could not find her. She was out hoeing

And she was hoeing and actually I didn't even know she I would didn't even know if it was a boy or girl Like it was not confirmed if it was a boy or girl. So I just said I think it's a she And um, Isaac was at his dad's and I told Natalie I'm like, I'm gonna have to tell Natalie that barn cat is gone because I haven't seen her And she's like just wait Isaac comes back the cat comes back. So I was like, okay, that's it's fine Didn't even think of the possibility that this fucking cat could have gotten pregnant because all my cats are fixed So I just don't know why I assumed that she was also fixed

um Because this specific one I didn't take to get fixed. So I just assumed How do you know she's pregnant though? Do you see your nipples? Oh because she I'm not I don't know this for certain But before I took her to the vet originally because I take I took her to the vet a couple weeks ago Because it looked like she had some sort of eye infection And I told the vet I was like she got out and this is how she came back Like I don't even she disappeared out into the fucking tundra and I never saw her for like two weeks

Um, and this is how she came back. So I took her to the vet and they were like, don't worry about it We'll put her on some antibiotics got her all figured out and then they that's when they confirmed it was a girl So I was like, okay. Well, she must have been pregnant at that time So she's already like just like and I don't know this for sure But I think she may have had worms as a baby because she never really grew to like a full cat size like my indoor cats are huge And she never grew like she still looks like a kitten herself back up back up good So worms make she not grow

I don't know. I'm assuming if they have worms for a long period of time It probably stood up stunts their growth, right? Because you need the nutrients To grow and if you have worms and they're eating all the nutrients that you that you're eating. I'm assuming I don't know. That's I don't like a fucking parasite. I think worms are a parasite No one should listen to this podcast Like the stuff that we say like no one should No one so anyway, she's a naturally like she looks like a fucking kitten herself like she never grew to full size Get back from Thailand and me and that are looking at her like wow

She's really getting big like we go away for 10 days come back and she's a different fucking cat Didn't think anything of it the next day. Lindsay the next fucking day She waltzes herself right in up on the couch and she rolls onto her back And her belly is like this and her nipples are enlarged. I said this motherfucker is pregnant Hmm, how's he was that pulling a kale from 2009 that you know what that's exactly what I was about to say I was like, you know about the enlarged nipples like Okay, I could not believe it. I have to tell you and I'm not trying to scare you

No, but growing up my biological mom had a cat infestation. Remember me telling you about this Absolutely. No, I don't remember telling you telling me about this. I'm pretty sure I talked about this on the podcast at some point but she Had these cats we had we started with two and then They just started multiplying and once that happens. It's really hard to like get control of it Unless you take every single one of them to get fixed. Yes

It's like really really hard and then the cats just like kept having babies and then the kitten started having babies and it just became like Way out of fucking control. I mean to the point that Um, I felt like she was a cat collector. Um, she had all these cats like in her garage It was it was literally insane And they got pregnant by wild cats Like bobcats and like different and they came out with no tails and they were mean as fuck That's like wolf dog hybrids. Yeah, they were mean as fuck. Like you couldn't even touch them like to try to

Even get them to the vet. We had to call somebody out To like come catch them to catch them so that we could even get them to the vet Because they were wild like they had no tails pro create with themselves too, which probably also made them mean Yeah, they were basically incest. Well, I wish that I could I I'm actually should have like the cameras roll back and see if I wish I knew what date she like actually disappeared because I would roll back the cameras and like check Um, I haven't seen any cats around. So if it's a like bobcat or something. That's actually terrifying Um, my plan right now is as soon as she gives birth

I don't know how soon I can get her fixed But I want to get her fixed and I don't I need to find out how soon I can get kittens fixed Because I don't want any of them pro creating not not just for like cat control population But like for their health and safety themselves, you know what I mean? Oh, absolutely like I I feel like that's a very very very slippery slope also just want to tell you that um I used to be like really into watching scary movies when I was a kid And then I kind of like grew out of it. I I now like really don't love to do it

Um, I have to be like super in the mood to do it. Yeah, I had this bedroom in the basement because our house Didn't how it had like the main floor and then you like went under So it was like what is it called a split level? Yeah, it was like a split level And my room was down there and this was when I was in like sixth and seventh grade and um I would go to bed at night and Hear what I thought was a baby crying

It was cats it was cats fucking outside the window And like I was scared to tell my parents that somebody was dropping their baby off like I was a dumbass I was like someone's dropping their baby off in these bushes And I didn't even know what sex was then like I had no idea What it was because like I told you we didn't have those conversations like I was very juvenile for My age. I was just like very sheltered So I didn't even know what that was so like cats having sex was not

On your radar whatsoever radar whatsoever. So immediately I'm like there is a baby out there in a carrier and like Someone's dropping it off like in these bushes at night And it was cats fucking. Do you know that that's what they sound like a baby crying? No, but I did hear I read online that they'll like Nest and then they'll start like pretty much screaming and crying when they give birth So like I'll very much probably know when she goes into labor. Oh, you absolutely will Coffee combos podcast is sponsored by better help

Lindsay and I talk about therapy all the time and we want to remind you that as the weather gets nicer You want to feel good? You want to feel your best? Therapy is a great option. Better help is a great option. I absolutely love better help I absolutely love therapy and when you're at your best you can do great things Sometimes life can get you bogged down. You might feel overwhelmed or like you're just not showing up the way that you want to And working with a therapist can help you get closer to the best version of you because when you feel empowered You are more prepared to take on everything life throws at you Also, that's not to say that it won't be hard working through, you know

Some of the things that you need to get through can be challenging. So keep that in mind But if you do want to try therapy, definitely give better help a try. This is a great option It's convenient flexible affordable and entirely online All you have to do is fill out a brief questionnaire to get matched with a licensed therapist and you can switch therapist Anytime for no additional charge. If you want to live a more empowered life therapy can get you there Visit betterhelp.com slash coffee today to get 10 off your first month. That's better help HELP.com slash coffee Tree Hut is the creator of america's number one body scrub and they've just released new hydrating gel washes

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I wouldn't starve with And that is definitely the era that I'm in right now Explain that a little bit further. So is that is that like I'm not gonna do anything for someone that I wouldn't go through Hell with is that kind of what he's saying? Yeah, like I don't want just like extra Seeds in my table right that I can't go through like all of the life phases with does that make sense? Right I think will smith said something along the lines of like if you're not there for my struggle You don't deserve to be there for my success and that's kind of like

Goes hand in hand. Yeah Like someone that's not going through hell with me doesn't deserve to sit there at the top with me kind of thing like I have taken this to the next level of I'm proud of myself But at the same time it's almost scary because I've caught so much noise out of my life And so when it's silent, that's almost scary too and I think it's just because

I've had so much chaos around my life for such a long period of time that now that it's gone like It's almost like you don't know how to function without it But that's not to say like I don't wish you the best and want you to succeed and sit at your own table There's room for all of us at the top. Just maybe not with me I don't want to go through hell with you if you're gonna Make it harder to get through shit that I'm already going through Yeah, like I only want to go through hell with somebody who is willing to hold my hand through the fire And then we're coming out on the other end, right? Like you're just gonna hold me back

While I'm trying to fucking jump through these fire rings and I'm not you're not for me Like when I tell you I probably text five people like five You and Kristen are two Um, I follow bunny hidea on tiktok. Do you know who she is? Is that? Jelly rolls No, no, no, no like funny um this other girl bunny hidea is

Is she's like a pilot and her husband, I believe is also a pilot and they homeschool their son or whatever They're actually going through a divorce. I think oh, wow but she Got she caught a lot of heat on tiktok because she said she has 30 best friends 30 best friends I don't even know 30 people she said that like she has 30 best friends that she texts on a daily to monthly basis I don't even have time to do that So how do you feel about that like having 30 best friends? No, because you don't have 30 best friends Why though like you just don't

Like I feel like you have a lot of friends too and it's Kind of like alarming to me. I don't but I don't now Consider them friends like their acquaintances. They are I don't invite people to my house anymore I don't have like people in and out like I used to like I just don't I would consider the people that I talk to you A lot of them are acquaintances. They're not my friends But see I wouldn't even talk to acquaintances You can literally confirm this with Kristen like I just I don't like I just talked to my friends What would you consider an acquaintance just someone that you know from

Jackson school or like you know of them. Yeah, like I know of them I mean, I'm not going to go out of my way to like Be mean or rude to anybody like I'm always going to be like nice and if I see them I might carry on a conversation with them But it's going to be one of those conversations that's probably like very surface Like I don't want to know your business and I don't want to in mine. Okay, you know, yeah Like I'm not going to open up to that person It's going to be like, hey, how's your family?

You know shoot the shit a little bit and then be like, okay, I'm about to be on my way and I hope you are too So like maybe at like basketball with one of the parents That's how we go. Yeah, same. But like I just don't like Like why does acquaintances need to be texting me? No, I don't think acquaintances need to be like text your friends Like no shame, but don't text me Um, so what do you do if someone that you consider an acquaintance? considers you a friend because that's that's me a lot of the time is people think that I'm their friend But they're an acquaintance to me. That's because you allowed them to

To let them think that you're their friend. So what would you do if the if someone no one thinks that? Like literally no one thinks that you're like, I wouldn't give someone the chance to think they're my friend No, I will be honest with you I think within the last three years because I've just been through so much with a public divorce um my parents stuff There's just been like a lot That there is no question like no nobody thinks that they're my friend. That's not my friend

Like nobody and that's not to be rude. It's just like no, no, no, no not at all I like my people and they're my people and then I don't care about the other people I wish I was like that, but I feel like I'm too nice to people And then they think we're besties and we're just not like what would you do? No, I definitely have that situation Um, and you set yourself up because then they be thinking you are their friend How do you not like how do you draw that line without saying like Lately, you're my acquaintance. I'm not actually your friend. Like how do you say that without saying it?

You do it in your approach of your Acquaintance ship. You know what I mean? Like no, you're just like, oh like I I hope you have a good life like What No, okay. So like let me let me let me let me come up with an example. Okay I'm at football with lux. Yep And someone walks up to me and they're talking to me and I'm talking back small talk or whatever How do I let them know in that conversation that I'm talking to you as an acquaintance? Not as a friend because you're not going to that level of friend conversation

There's a difference between an acquaintance conversation and a friend conversation. So when they take it too far What do you do go somewhere else? I just will be getting up. Okay. So you're like, okay. I'm gonna go get a drink I'm gonna go run to the bathroom I'm gonna go put on some lip gloss gonna run in my car anything with this Do anything with this? Okay. Yeah That's that's what I'm gonna be doing. I'm gonna try that on next sunday when I have when lux has football Mm-hmm. I will be trying that and letting you know how it goes. I love these case studies Are you also going to make egg in a hole? Yeah, I'm gonna try that as well

I might have a lie should try it first and then I'll replicate Yeah, because otherwise it'll be the blind meaning the blind Okay, so I want to talk about this Listener topic because I think it's there's actually two really good ones should people in relationships and marriages be able to go on vacation without each other and I feel like My answer to this looks different today than when I'm gonna say my first marriage in case I get married again I am gonna go ahead and say yes

They should be able to and I don't know why be able to be able is in quotes. I'm not sure about that um Because I think they're saying like Allowed, you know, like okay, like be allowed Here's the thing. I have to fill my own just like being a parent. You have to fill your own cup before you can fill anybody else's cup um If you're in a stable marriage or you're in a stable relationship where you're not worried about cheating or this that in the third Why the fuck not? Why can't you go on a on a trip without without your significant other?

That takes me back to the point that I was saying once a cheater always a cheater or not always a cheater I think that if you Have toxic patterns in a relationship that like that exists and has ever existed Then that's where this comes into play because there's not enough trust for this to be able to happen But I think that if you never Break trust from the jump Why wouldn't this be a normal situation? So like for example

Elijah and I I told him off rip I was like I go on a lot of trips whether it's a work trip a fun trip a kid trip I like to travel that is a number one thing for me He he said he would go but he also doesn't have the same sense of like urgency to visit around the world and like to Go here and there and everywhere If he happens to get his passport and i'm going somewhere he would come But like that that too is like he loves to tinker and do shit in the garage and like build shit and like mow the lawn and like

Stuff i'm not interested in i'm interested in traveling. Why can't we coexist and be in a stable relationship? Or those you know, I like to travel in my time and he likes to do the things that he does in his time And then we have separate stuff that we do together I feel like you absolutely should be able to do Trips that's my opinion like let's say I was in a relationship with somebody that Likes to do let me think of something. I don't want to do um

Go hunting for example if you think i'm waking up at 2 30 or 3 o'clock in the morning to go sit in a deer stand You're absolutely out of your fucking mind immediately know Like you are going on that trip never like that's off the table You are going on that trip on your own and I don't care and i'm not going to blow you up and quite frankly if you are sitting Drinking beer in a deer stand for however long Honestly, that's a babysitting service for me. So like good like i'm i'm glad that that's what you're doing

That's a babysitting service. Also I have no Interest in the fucking world to go snowboarding or skiing if you want to go on a snowboarding or skiing trip I'll see you in a week. I'm not interested There's a lot of things that i'm not interested in quite frankly. Um, but there's a lot of things that i'm also interested in and Here's another thing like i'm okay with going on a trip with someone and Let's say like i'm in a relationship with this person and they like to do things that I don't like to do

Like i'm perfectly cool with them going and doing their own shit like on that same trip Yep And me doing my own shit on that trip because everybody should be able to enjoy right? Yeah, yeah, yeah Of course And that goes for trip like friend trips too Like if you and I went on a trip and you want to go sit by the pool and I want to go a tving That doesn't piss me off in any way shape or form Like if you want to go get dusty as fuck and i'm sitting by the pool drinking a mojito

Like that's on me and that's on you Yeah, you know, I agree. I definitely agree with I'm glad we're on the same page with that one. I think it goes Not only like just cheating like come into play in that situation and like a trust thing, but I think also just overall stability in a relationship Of and having the confidence within yourself not just in that relationship That relationship but just having enough confidence within yourself to know like okay This person has interest and wants to do things and like wants to spend time with other people

And I want to do you know things and spend time with other people And we're always not going to want to do like the exact same things And that should be okay at the point that you are in a relationship Where you feel like you have to babysit somebody and check in with them Like they are your teenage kid Then you need to be out of it Have you ever been in a relationship where you did not want to travel because you didn't want to leave said person by themselves

Yes, because of cheating not because you felt bad leaving them because that's probably One of my darkest relationships was when I was like Didn't want to do work did not want to go on work trips did not want to do anything because if I was afraid if I left They would cheat and like obviously they're gonna they're gonna find a way to cheat whether you're in town or out of town But there's that do we know why I have not been on trips For like the past what since september because literally every trip I went on in This relationship that I was in the person would come back and cheat on me Even if they were with me on the trip would come back and cheat it's but like why like I need to know

For serial serial cheaters like why I need to know what like what the why is I think some people are very scared of commitment and when they see it right in front of their face They they want that But they don't know how to do that. Well, that makes me go back to the conversation we had weeks ago where Men will marry whoever's in front of them when they're ready to settle down not necessarily who they're in love with I mean that could very well be true because I mean it's unfortunate mindset, but Could be true Couldn't be me

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It's just very convenient. I am looking forward to My trips coming up because I just feel prepared if you guys want to try this Definitely go check out care of vitamins and supplements and for 50% off your first care of order go to takecareof.com And enter code coffee 50 again That's 50% off your first care of order go to takecareof.com and enter code coffee 50 Okay, this is a second one. What is something that you would do for a husband that you would never do for a boyfriend? um made a huge mistake

in dating will made a huge mistake dating suburban dad doing wife things for A boyfriend and then by the time I got married to will I had set the tone and it became expectations versus

Like I'm doing this out of the kindness of my heart and like I want to do this because it helps you or it makes you feel good or whatever Um, it was almost an expectation at that point and I allowed it to be an expectation because I allowed him to expect it I'm stuck on this one. I can't really think of I'll tell you a couple that I did. Okay I cooked a lot when we were in college. Okay, and early in our marriage and It became a chore versus

Like oh like I'm very thankful that you know, she does this and I'm not saying that I need to be praised for putting a meal on the table um, but at the same time Some would be nice, you know versus just like expecting it every night. Right. So when I stopped doing it Um, and started working more than resentment built. Yep so like setting a tone and then I wasn't able to keep it up because Life things changed for me, but life things stayed the same for him. I wouldn't repeat those Things in a relationship at 33 years old

Okay, I'm gonna go in to that relationship Saying like do not expect me to cook every night. Do not expect that You know, I'm gonna have my shit together 24 seven like I have a calendar. I have shit that like I have to do and Monday through Friday It's grind time and the weekends like if we want to grill if we want to whatever then that's perfectly fine, but I'm not going to Be super planned out on fucking dinner plans like that stresses me out and I'm just like not going to do that

um Washing clothes every single day like I might do that But I also might not because I might have other shit to do that reminds me of I I'm not going to look for it because it's going to take too much time But that reminds me of a tiktok I just saw and it was highly controversial with the like Viewers because they were like, oh fuck. No, just say that you're living with someone and she was going on to say like She doesn't do her partner's laundry and it's her husband. She's like he I've seen this

I've seen it. I think she had like blonde hair. It was like a girl with blonde hair. Yeah, she was like, I don't do his laundry um, we have two separate bank accounts and like people were pissed but also You have to do what works for you and I have made so many mistakes throughout all of my relationships where like You know, there was you know, when I was married there was a portion of that marriage where I've already told the story. So I'm I don't feel bad saying it again um, you know, I was cooking regularly um, so that he would have a hot meal when he came home and It became an expectation kind of like what you said and it does start to build resentment like when you don't keep up with it

and the same goes for me like I'm sure I've Introduced people to something that I that I never maintained but you know things change or whatever Um, the day that he flipped out about the carrots in the pot roast I was like, oh no, we're not doing this anymore. And so I'm sure he hated my guts after ever since then but um, You know, I've bought cars for people. I wasn't married to I've bought Beds and apartments and so there's really nothing that I can say that I wouldn't do for a boyfriend or that I wouldn't do Until we were married. I think That one's tough for me because I just feel like

Married or not. I'm not doing your laundry married or not. We're we're Delegating to whoever is best fit for the task Well, we were talking about the you know It should be the most efficient. Yeah the person that can do it most efficiently um Not that I wouldn't do Some of those things for a boyfriend. I just don't want it to be an expectation that I'm going to do those things So like if I'm doing it

That's out of the kindness of my heart and don't expect it. Um, also you should be working together as a team So like if my day looks over full and you know that like I I can't do more But there are things that need to be done And their day is not as busy pick up those tasks and I will return that it has to be uh A partnership and I think that's where a lot of people go wrong where it's there's all these expectations on this one person And then not the expectations on the other and then it just becomes a resentful situation Um, and I think once the resentment sets in it's really hard to get away from it Yeah, once the resentment sets in it's almost like and maybe I'm only speaking for women because I feel like we stay in

relationships until we're the fuck over them and then we get out when we're done done done The once the relationship builds for me at least I'm like it's not you can't get me back after that. Mm-hmm. Oh, yeah No, I think I regularly say like once I'm done I'm done, but it takes me a long time to get there. Mm-hmm. You know because we were talking about how I am Really a stayer versus a lever even though I've been the one to leave in two different situations But you stay until you can like you're done. Yeah until I'm like until I am for real done Yeah, no, I agree with that. Um, I want to ask you about high conflict parenting um

you had said that you want to talk about this and um Question is is how do you decide who has the final say in certain situations? I want to know high high conflict Yeah, high conflict. Um, I know you and will Have been high conflict at some point and I've been high conflict with my situations um, and so I guess my question is You know, you had mentioned before

You have it in your co-parenting plan that you know, you have final say on medical He has final say on sports So you did your plan after I did mine with my high conflict situation And there's a lot of things that are very ambiguous or vague in mine That is really frustrating and the way I feel like it was handled was very frustrating because there is nothing in there that says final say and the judge knew Very much so that we were high conflict So how does like I just feel like that should go without saying that it should be included

Like you shouldn't have to ask for who has final say because when you're putting two high conflict parents In into a courtroom and you're laying out the like I'm saying if it comes to the judge's decision, which it did Why are you not including who gets final say? We clearly had could not get through mediation not once but twice We had to have somebody come in and do a huge All-inclusive evaluations on both homes watch how we interact with the kids. What kind of house do we live at all of these things? I mean our parenting plan is probably 40 pages and it has like the summary of like what she found and like All of this stuff and I just feel like Why is that not included who has a final say so one we live in two different counties two different school districts

We live an hour away Who gets final say it doesn't make sense to me? So I think it's pretty standard in the state of georgia that there are four areas that You know one or the other parent is you know, going to have the final say um And most custody Plans that are parenting plans that I am aware of It is normally set out something like okay

um education medical extracurricular and religion are the four areas right and There's some type of clause in there that says that you know, you should um try to reach agreement before The final sayer Makes the ultimate decision. So like if I for example, um take jackson to the doctor

I always am the person that has always taken him to the doctor every medical appointment, whatever I always let will know What's going on and keep him informed because not only is that the right thing to do? I am ordered to do that Um, but even if I wasn't ordered I still would do that Let's say there was a disagreement for some reason about something like I wanted to give him an antibiotic But will didn't or vice versa I have to consult with him About it, but if he disagrees with me, I still have the final say I just have to prove that

You're backed up by facts or whatever Reasoning you have to give it to him to give it to him. Yeah um I have heard people Actually recently I have heard Someone where they alternate odd even years on decision-making for that stuff But what about things that are you that are not that way like what about

Haircuts piercings school sports school districts. What about travel? Like what if someone is involved in a travel sport and one parent that has the child 50% of the time does not participate Who gets final say on that? I don't know because you're You have a situation of High conflict and some of the things that you experience I just don't have the experience and I think that I could go out on a limb and say I won't ever have those experiences so

whereas My parenting plan is is pretty thorough. It also doesn't have anything about like piercings or Mightness and either but I'm just like specifically medical and sports are where I struggle Because in one situation it's like I don't want to name names because I'm not talking shit in any way. So I just want to preface this I'm getting along with joe hobby and chris right now. So I do not want to rock the boat in any way

I'm just wanting to get through this so In a situation that I have that's not high conflict one of the situations that occurred was a falling out we'll call it between an activity and my child's father and Child's father said my child is not coming back to this association. And so So for me it was like

Why do you get why do you have a final say on where my child is going because it's my child too? And this is the only association of this Um Activity that we've done. So this is what we know. This is where his peers are. This is where his friends are And we've had a good run with them for several years So like does he have final decision making an extracurricular? There is no one no one has final say See, um Coming up

Easter Um, it was so sweet. Jackson was He woke up the other morning and we were just laying in the bed and he was like mom Easter is my favorite holiday and I told you I always do like big Easter baskets and you know, like we kind of go all out for Easter And I grew up that way. We always went to Julie's granny's and

um It was just a big a big to-do And I text will because I don't have him for Easter this year. It's been hard because I It's his spring break right now and him being away from me for A week is really hard But then spring break and Easter kind of like go together. So I lose spring break and Easter um, but it's okay because

Will's allowing me to have him two of his days of spring break so that I can Celebrate Easter and do like all of my Easter things ahead of Easter And so I think that if you can get past the conflict part and be solution oriented Then you guys can find a way to work together Hopefully, um, but you have to have a pattern of doing that. I mean right now you have to start somewhere on Sunday Chris I saw him at the football game and I'm like, please let's just do a truce like

Whatever it is going to take to do what we have to do for these fucking kids like I love the kids You love these kids like Please let's do a truce. So we've been getting along this week Um, and we're like, what's today? Tuesday. So it's only been a couple days. Um, Actually, that might have been last weekend. That's but it feels good, right? It does because yes, it I think it was actually last weekend. I don't think it was this weekend No, I know for a fact. So we've it's been at least a week So I'm like and it just feels good to like like I texted him yesterday and I was like, hey

Like do you mind not cutting creed's hair like that short? Um, because he they have this thing in their family I won't say what it's called because it's his dad's last name and I don't know if he've ever put that out there But it's this big lump on the back of their head. Mm-hmm And creed has it just like Chris and I was like if you leave his hair a little bit longer on top It doesn't show the back of his lump And he was like, yeah, no problem. So like just being able to get along for something like that. And then surprisingly Um, Javi said hi to me at Lincoln's basketball game over the weekend. So I was like, okay

I was like, we don't have to be best friends. We don't have to have a conversation But you saying hi. Good morning to me was like, okay, we're at least getting along like or we can at least be civil in the same area Like I'm happy with that. I want everyone to be good. I don't care if you never fucking talked to me between Now and the next game like that's fine. But if we're on a at a point where we can say hi to each other I know that we are capable of Getting past that conflict part. It feels so good. Um, big shout out to Jose and Chris um from coffee convos podcast lindsay chrisley and the kitty game

Yes Love you guys this week Coffee convos podcast is brought to you by progressive insurance. Hey kitty gang, whether you love true kind or comedies, celebrity interviews, news, even motivational speakers, you call the shots on what's in your podcast queue, right? And guess what? Now you can call the shots on your auto insurance too. Enter the name your price tool from progressive The name your price tool puts you in charge of your auto insurance by working just the way it sounds You tell progressive how much you want to pay for car insurance Then they'll show you a variety of coverages that fit within your budget giving you options

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Especially when there are really charming graphics and lead back gameplay with a full story of scandalous secrets For the perfectly cozy game you guys can download love and pies by trail mix games or free It's a casual merge to game where you build your very own cafe Combine ingredients and uncover a story of drama and romance You're going to play as Amelia as you take over the old family cafe and restore it to its former glory And you'll meet a diverse cast of characters as you uncover a family story full of secrets and laughs And honestly like who just like does not love secrets I think my favorite part is being able to decorate the cafe and surrounding area with items that you design

I just love a creative moment in a game. So that's my favorite part And they aim to create a safe and powering space for players of all ages So I do want to mention that with each beautiful game. They create they're fostering a culture of trust respect and creativity So for a tasty mix of love and drama download love and pies for free today That's love and pies free to download on the app store or google play I want to talk about this really really quick before we do foul play because Starting to get hot outside and we regularly see Headlines like this start coming up about this time of the year

I know that you've already seen it It says Florida grandmother charged in the hot car death of granddaughter less than a year after grandson drowned while in her care It says a Florida woman is demanding prison time for her own mother after two years After her two young children died less than a year apart while allegedly in their grandmother's care one in a hot car death And the other in an accidental drowning She was also a principal. Okay, but I just want to say before we like proceed any further from this If I had left my children in the care of my mother and One of them had already passed

Um, due to some form of negligence While in said grandmother's care. Mm-hmm. I wouldn't trust this person With my second child. No, absolutely not And I was watching an interview between the parents And they were saying how they didn't allow their oldest to go with the grandmother because they didn't trust her So something was very weird about that. So you didn't trust her with the oldest son But you trusted her not once but twice with the little two And they both died

So it says that she was arrested and charged in November 2022 with aggravated manslaughter and leaving a child unsupervised in a motor vehicle Um, also, let me just mention to that point Um, my last vehicle was a 2019 and then my current vehicle is the 2021 both of them have the back of the car vehicles the 2021 both of them have the backseat reminders on them and This woman was driving a 2019 lexus and commenters were saying that they also drive a 2019 lexus Her model that also has the backseat reminder. So something is really and mine. I don't know if you have it or if it has ever gone off Um, specifically says on the like where the dash is like with all the odometer things

It says check your backseat reminder. Check your backseat or whatever and it dings like an alarm So it's like if you didn't see the dash like it's ringing So you have to check the dash to see what's going on and it just happened to me Yesterday when I was pulling in the garage getting out of my vehicle. It said don't forget to check your backseat So like something is not mapping. So it says that She was asked to watch the granddaughter um while the mom was at a hair appointment

mm-hmm, and It said that she drove to a restaurant with her friends. Um, they left the restaurant around 1 40 p.m security footage showed that she put the granddaughter in the rear car seat um and driveway and Said that she drove about 10 minutes to her home Parked the car went inside to Talk to her dog and practiced the piano

For a long time for a long time, right? Because it says that After 4 30 p.m. She took two cups of tea out of her vehicle for her and her grandson and then drove the vehicle to her backyard um I was in the backyard talk was talking for 10 minutes and Then all of a sudden it came across her head that the child was still in the car Said that they pulled the baby out immediately started

CPR and someone called 911 The baby was pronounced dead at the scene temperatures that day Reached 90 degrees the autopsy showed no signs of injuries and her death was ruled as a homicide It said in december 2021 the couple 16 month old Son died also while in her care court records state that nix was babysitting the little boy while she fell asleep The child wandered outside and drowned in a pond near her home She was not charged in that incident. How are you a principal and respond?

You're responsible for all those kids at a school, but you can't even watch Your two grandchildren safely also If you fall asleep watching my child and my child wanders down to a pool You're never getting a second chance to watch another one of my children ever again. That's what I was saying like that's that's very fishy to me as far as the parents go and I don't know if you saw the interview

um between the the parents um It was an interview I know some of the comments were like you can't judge how she's grieving or how he's grieving But like there is a lot of fishy things about the couple that really just kind of rubbed me the wrong way I'll be interested to see you know kind of how This plays out. Um I'm alarmed that she was never charged with anything the first time like whether you fall asleep or not a child

Still negligent died From an accidental drowning And that you're negligent you were negligent. Yeah, and it was I guess manslaughter would be like an unintentional Let me google it just before I Talk out of my ass manslaughter definition

The crime of killing a human being without malice at a forethought or otherwise in circumstances not amounting to murder So is common law legal term for homicide considered by law less culpable than murder the distinction between murder and manslaughter is sometimes said to have been To first been made by the ancient so basically Manslaughter should have been the first one negligence manslaughter something of the first child as well So I just don't really understand why that was never charged number one number two um Unintentional killing of another person

She should have been charged two children have now died because of your Negligent so that's what something is fishy about it. Like it's very weird It said that her pre-trial hearing is set for May 2nd. So I'm sure we'll be hearing more as it unfolds But there was a case in Georgia years ago I think it was in like 2018 with a little boy named Cooper Harris and

Um, it was also a hot car dad a hot car death. The dad worked at um, Home Depot corporate. Yep. I remember this and I was very very invested in this case and so alarmed by it. Um, I will post the Wikipedia because it does a pretty good job of like, you know covering the the story but But that one was intentional. No, that was that was intentional. Um, they actually there was so much media coverage around that They had to move his trial to another district

um to just keep Keep down the media. Um, it was it was really insane. But I mean that that case was so crazy Like we've said before with technology today Um, why people would think that they were going to get away with anything Is insane to me. He was research in all kinds of shit about how long it would take For a small animal to die in a hot car

Um on like his work computer. They see is his iPads all different kinds of stuff. So I I will be interested to see what what actually Comes of this situation because I agree. It's very fishy I just feel like there are so many Alternatives to killing your child like I full-on understand that having a child is a lot more work than people are willing to admit or Um, you know, you know, maybe they don't want to be the bad guy. They don't want to go sign off their rights They don't want to go put their child at a fucking Fire station or a church building or whatever. But like if you think you're going to get away with it

Like I wish I'm while I was googling manslaughter definition I'm like if I ever am under some shit and they google They look on my phone at what I not my phone my computer at what I googled and there's manslaughter on here Thank god we're recording so they can understand the contents. Yeah I mean, I just what goes through your fucking head go drop your if you don't want to be a dad anymore You want to go be with your mistress? You want to go do this? Your child is better off you leaving them and abandoning them than to Kill them go tell your wife you need to sign off her rights and you're not fit to be a dad

one of the biggest problems today is lack of mental health awareness and Seeking professional help for mental health issues because you cannot tell me that this person Especially in the case of cooper here is that there were not mental health things going on like no one just like googles This type of shit that he was googling well at the moment that you're think and I guess I guess it's not cut and dry and that's where I struggle is like

Some people with mental health illnesses mental illnesses like myself. I have depression But like it came to a point where like people in my corner were like you need to get help There were signs that people you know Kristen and Natalie were like you need help I also had to accept that and I and I do and I got the help and I'm On track with it, but I guess there are people who have mental illnesses who are not willing to accept that and so Maybe they just can't but like at what cost like you At the moment that you google or you're thinking about killing your child. You don't think to just go

Get help Even if you don't get help for yourself, but say hey, like i'm having these thoughts I need to go do I need to go take care of me like I need you to keep the kid for a while and I guess that's where I have a hard time because I haven't experienced that Like I wanted to get help for my kids um And so I guess it's really hard for me to see the other side of it and i'm not trying to like It's not a shaming. It's no like I don't want to shame anybody, but I guess at that point it's just like

Is it a mental health thing or are you just fucking evil? I don't know. I mean, I do think that that evil definitely exists, but I think that it is some type of like mental health issue and brain chemistry Issue like I I am convinced of that Um, I've just watched way too much true crime. Honestly, um Um, can we do foul play? Yes, I'm gonna pull it up right now

Foul play everybody Okay, I'm currently out of town for my partner's birthday weekend The first night we went we went a little too hard partying which isn't out of the norm for us Usually I'm lucky and don't experience bad hangovers. I woke up today feeling normal headaches needing some fluids Unfortunately, it took a huge turn for the worst. I've been non-stop vomiting We decided to take a shower and get ready Get get ready for the house thinking my hangover will pass We made it to the ocean and was able to spend time with the ocean that immediately needed to go home

Because I puke twice I felt awful that I ruined his birthday trip because I needed to stay in the hotel room He's extremely considerate and doesn't mind and says we can have a relaxing day with peace and quiet We have a toddler. We're sitting on the couch laying down watching hulu Just trying to be brought back to life as I was laying on the couch and felt the needed to need to art No, this is a shark. Oh, no. Yeah. Well, it wasn't a fart and I sharded all over the hotel couch He just laughs and tells me he loves me so much and we end up laughing and making jokes just my luck Okay. Well, that's a that's a keeper for you. Um

This there's a couple thoughts that I have of this just how disgusting like actual we've talked about this before like hotels are Like the fact that we have a listener writing in telling us that That she sharded on said hotel couch like what hotel because I don't want to go to it You know, but I'm sure she had pants on so I don't think it's like on the hotel couch like actual couch Like it could have in fact have been like what if she was strolling around like me with a large t-shirt on no panties and sharded True. This is true or like Underwear and that's a chart is for sure coming through the underwear like you can't be so sure And that's what really alarms me about going to hotels in general

Like what is potentially in the carpet on all of the surfaces? It's when christen christen told me That they typically don't wash the comforter and that's what bothers me Why would you assume that you don't need to wash the comforter like who told you that's allowed If you have if you're washing the sheets, which you should be oh actually Chris that and I just stayed in a hotel last week and let me tell you something You found a cube on the sheet No, we came back from you know how usually like if you go to like the breakfast or if you go out in the morning

You come back usually they have gum and done housekeeping, which is like the trash and like making beds I came I had taken a shower and I put the little towel that they Specifically supply for the for the like the shower mat so that you can step out so that your feet drip on the towel Uh-huh So we go out for breakfast and we come back And I said did you roll that back up and she was like what and I was like the mat that you Step out on to from the shower. Did you roll it back up and she's like no why? I said

They didn't make our beds or anything else. They didn't clean up our room. They didn't make our beds They did nothing else but roll up the fucking mat from the shower and put it back on the on the um ledge of the tub like that to me um They didn't even restock our toilet paper and it freaked me the fuck out because I'm like What the fuck was it like a moment where they came in and then got preoccupied doing something else and like forgot to come back I don't know but I was just like that's so strange to me like they did nothing And it's not like anything was on our beds

Because we only had carry-ons because we never made it to our destination and we were only supposed to be there 24 hours anyway, um But yeah, I was like christen. What the fuck and then I just let it go but then I'm thinking to myself If that's what they're doing in here. They probably didn't even wash the sheets Oh, it's really honestly alarming and you should just if you're going to a hotel you should immediately stop thinking because At the point that you start thinking you you just would rather sleep in your car. Um, yeah I've thought about this with rental cars. Um, Um, specifically ones that don't have leather seats. Yeah

Um Hotels, I know that there are people that are listening to this that are going to second What I'm about to say that you have pulled down your sheets and seen like a cube um It's just it's really disgusting if you peel back the actual sheets You'll see like on the mattress pad how they'll be like little like Pubee looking hairs on it and it's like, okay. Yeah, like I I cannot do this. Um And now the fact that I know that somebody has sharded on a hotel couch

You're immediately alarmed. I'm immediately alarmed. I just also need to say that I hope that this person is still with the person that they sharded on the couch with Because seems like a good person to me. Yeah, I'm glad that he laughed and like made you feel okay about it. Um, next My name is Haley. I'm obsessed with you guys and your podcast Backstory when I was 12 or 13 in middle school. I wanted to be cool like the older girls and have sex Well, I was weird and emo and that was hard to come by so I just told everyone I had been having sex I started dating this older boy. Maybe one or two grades ahead of me I told him I wasn't a virgin and I was so of course he wanted to have sex

I told him let's just start slow and only do other things for a couple weeks One night I was at his house. His parents let us go into his room with the door shut Mind you his dad always told him if he didn't lose his virginity by the time he was 14 That meant he was gay. So by those standards. He had to live up to it. He wasn't a virgin I hate this person's dad. Who the fuck says that that is so disturbing to me that person's dad Anyways, we go into his room and we're making out and he starts to finger me. He's doing it so hard. He pops my cherry Neither of us noticed until we were done and he pulled his hand out of my pants with blood all over it We were both mortified. He said I thought you weren't a virgin and I played it off like I just

Like I had just gotten my period in the middle of it all He told everyone at our school and for the rest of middle school my middle school career. Everyone called me bloody mary Talk about horrifying. I hope you guys enjoyed my foul play. The whole situation still lives in my head But free 10 years later. Love you ladies. That's horrible. Honestly, I've heard of people getting their cherries popped like riding bikes Pogo sticks like weird shit. Yeah um That's just not happening with a finger for me. Like that's a no for me dog. Um, that couldn't have been pleasurable also

I'm not walking around lying about The fact that I've had sex if I haven't well, that's peer pressure. She was peer pressured. Okay But were you a type that were was peer pressured because I was not I was I was also wanted to have sex because One of my good friends was having sex and I felt like I needed to have sex as well The thoughts of even sex at 12 or 13 years old Like I was still going to blockbuster like on the weekends like that Looking for movies and snacks like I was not even I didn't even know what sex was

Oh, I didn't know what sex was when I had it. I had no fucking clue But like how did you know like to she told me play with his dick? Like how did you know I didn't play with it? There was no foreplay. There was no intimacy. There was stripped down on the sidewalk behind this building And put your shirt on the ground for me and I'll spread my legs like literally there was no romance no nothing No, no, no, no, no, no, no, but how did you know to spread them? He told me He told you he said spread your legs. Yeah, and then you just did it. Yeah. No immediately if someone told me to spread my legs I'm I'm yelling just turned 14 years old. I'm screaming for my dad immediately

I was newly 14. No, and I don't even think he wanted to do it But I was like, no Caitlyn said that we have to that like this is how we do it Did it feel good? Absolutely not if you were terrified. I walked home and there was blood dripping down my legs Wow But like I used to like walk miles and miles away from my home and like meet up with him Or like later on when we broke up and I was best friends with a sister Like we would walk miles and miles to like meet up with each other walk to the mall walk here and walk there like

We just it just like was a different Time than like right now. Yeah kill that But honestly at that that same time when it was like that time was also a different time for me. That's for you During that time Like if someone told me to go behind a building on a sidewalk and put down a shirt No Immediately. No, I'm running to the first fire station that I see. Yeah, it was probably like midnight also No

What were you doing at midnight on a sidewalk? Listen, my mom never asked where the fuck I was. She didn't ask who I was hanging out with She didn't know nothing. She knew nothing. No, I just casually walked in the house and walked straight up the stairs And that is why you are I'm not gonna say that's why you are that is probably why you are the type of parent you are today Oh my god, my kids can't like my kids can't get away with shit Isaac or Lincoln made one slip comment comments me last week and I was like, oh, okay bet And now he doesn't have his phone. So so bet try me if you want

Come for me. Um, okay, gonna end on this I want to leave you guys with this for the week because it was impactful to to my start of my week Um, it says emotional maturity looks like being okay with letting others be wrong and have the last word You drain yourself when you try to convince people to see a perspective They don't care to see be mature enough to disengage from things that disrupt your peace I absolutely love that and I'm gonna screenshot that so thank you Thank you, ma'am. Um, thank you guys for tuning in to our eclectic array of Bullshit this week. Um, if you have not subscribed to the show, you can do that on any podcast app

make sure you guys follow us on at coffee compost podcast on instagram and You can always get your podcast first at podcast one. Hope you guys have a great week and we'll talk to you soon See you All month long on Pluto TV stream the biggest Tyler Perry movies free Watch your favorites like Medea's witness protection and Medea's big happy family Join Tyler Perry as he goes on a couples retreat with Sharon leal and why did I get married or Idris Elba and Gabriel union in the Tyler Perry directed film daddy's little girls Plus Pluto TV has hundreds of channels with thousands more movies and TV shows available on live and on demand

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