Coffee Convos with Kail Lowry and Lindsie Chrisley - Dealing With Mom Guilt
Episode Date: September 29, 2022EP245: Kail is still recovering from this morning's chaos... she explains what happened that still has her adrenaline running. Lindsie is back from Orlando and shares the horrible discovery she has le...arned from Suburban Dad that involves sharting. Kail talks about her meltdown from this past week that many moms might relate to. The intrusive thoughts that mothers have can be overwhelming but sometimes we must understand that these moments may not be as big as we think they are... Lindsie gathers some questions from Facebook and a double wammy on Foul Play that gives us an update from a previous submission.  Thank you to our sponsors! Body Guardz: Go to BodyGuardz.com/coffee to protect your phone today Faherty: Visit FahertyBrand.com/COFFEECONVOS and use code COFFEECONVOS for 15% off your order Upside: Download the FREE Upside App and use promo code coffeeconvos to get $5 or more cash back on your first purchase of $10 or more Visa: Anyone can change the game Wondery: Listen to Whose Amazing Life? on Amazon Music, Apple Podcasts or the Wondery app
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                                        I hate gift giving and receiving receiving gifts is so weird. What do you say?
                                         
                                        Thank you. This is coffee convos with kale Lowry and Lindsay Chrisley. I really want you to be in your feels kale
                                         
                                        That does not interest me whatsoever. I feel very attacked by you a spirited discussion about motherhood friendship
                                         
                                        Family and life in the public eye. I'm just not with the fakery anymore. There's a fakery bakery around here
                                         
                                        Here's kale and Lindsay
                                         
                                        We are always fucking it up
                                         
                                        Hey, hello and welcome to coffee convos podcast kale Lowry. How are you?
                                         
                                        Um, I have no words for the amount of chaos that ensued this morning. So I am
                                         
    
                                        Coming down from an adrenaline rush. Would you like to share the chaos with the chaos crew or yeah, I would um, okay
                                         
                                        so
                                         
                                        Lincoln had like a dental issue and was beside himself because he was so afraid
                                         
                                        So the other night I laid with him until he fell asleep
                                         
                                        Laudita fast forward. He gets on antibiotics
                                         
                                        Um and requests that I'm there at the dentist appointment this morning
                                         
                                        And the only time that they had available which the dentist wanted to see him immediately
                                         
                                        Um was 8 a.m. And like that's all fine and good
                                         
    
                                        But my kids have to be to school at 8 15 and creed has to be like 8 39 o'clock
                                         
                                        My alarm didn't go off for some reason and I don't know if like I'm not doing something right
                                         
                                        But like I know I said it and I even woke up and I checked it and it was set but it never went off
                                         
                                        So I wake up at
                                         
                                        720 and the dentist appointment was at 8 and I still had to drop creed off at school
                                         
                                        And then I was like fuck it. I guess lux is coming with because
                                         
                                        What the actual fuck? Well, they ended up having to give him what is it called nitrous?
                                         
                                        Mm-hmm. Like the gas. Mm-hmm. They gasped your baby up
                                         
    
                                        Yeah, because he was so just like worried and upset and scared and um, I walk in and
                                         
                                        You came in here guns blazing, you know, it's like well, I overslept
                                         
                                        I didn't want to miss it. I didn't want to like upset him even more because I knew how upset he was
                                         
                                        And I don't know. I just think that there's something about moms with sons that
                                         
                                        That there's just like that nurturing calming usually
                                         
                                        Oh
                                         
                                        For sure to so
                                         
                                        As an adult like we see our kids and we know it's not that bad like we see
                                         
    
                                        What's good and the doc the dentist was like, this is nothing like the picture you sent like it's completely
                                         
                                        Not as bad as what the picture looked like and I was like, okay. Well, I'm relieved. I'm sorry for scaring everybody
                                         
                                        But like whatever wait, can you tell us what the what the issue was was this like a dangling tooth?
                                         
                                        Was this like an abscess like I thought well
                                         
                                        So I thought we thought it was like an abscessed and like a root canal like we thought it was a cavity
                                         
                                        That was so bad that was gonna need a root canal. No, man
                                         
                                        And so I I'm friends with one of the receptionists and she's like, can you send a picture or get him in?
                                         
                                        Um, and she's like, no, he you know, the dentist really wants to put him on antibiotics right away
                                         
    
                                        Um and get him in right away. So I'm like, okay, cool. Um, that being said, it was not that bad
                                         
                                        it was just and she was like, I just looked at his um
                                         
                                        X-rays from april that was a really really fast decline because nothing was on his
                                         
                                        X-ray from april not even a little cavity not a start of a cavity
                                         
                                        So but he does have an expander in his mouth. So he's not able to floss
                                         
                                        that tooth that great and so, um
                                         
                                        And I'm not shading hobby when I say this but I thought it was funny because it's not funny, but it is funny
                                         
                                        This this is no shade and I'm not I'm not being um
                                         
    
                                        malicious when I say
                                         
                                        Petty spaghetti. No, I'm really not like I'm just I want to talk about the experience because like
                                         
                                        The receptionist was so nice and when they were about to numb him
                                         
                                        With the needle they called lux out to go like pick a prize from the the cheser chest
                                         
                                        So I thought that was really smart and I didn't even think of that although lux was completely unfazed
                                         
                                        And asked when he was getting his teeth cleaned again. Um, and I'm like lux
                                         
                                        No, and he's like, but I like the feeling I'm like lux just chill out and hobby is rolling his eyes the whole time just like
                                         
                                        Not give like he
                                         
    
                                        Because as adults, we know it's not as bad as it feels when we're a kid
                                         
                                        And I think that hobby like does
                                         
                                        It's I shouldn't laugh, but it's like not I'm also don't care because I'm like rubbing lux uh, Lincoln's legs
                                         
                                        um
                                         
                                        Like his calves and stuff holding his hand and lux holds his hand
                                         
                                        And hobby's in the corner like rolling his eyes like he's fine like everyone needs to chill out
                                         
                                        But I like as his mom like fed into the drama a little bit and then
                                         
                                        I had my cats in the car because
                                         
    
                                        I feel like Susie cats in the car
                                         
                                        Yeah, kitty gang was coming with me riding dirty in the in the fucking car this morning
                                         
                                        Um, like this literally sounds like my worst fucking nightmare
                                         
                                        Do y'all remember my episode of 16 and pregnant where my mom's cat lived in the car?
                                         
                                        Anyway, I had the cats in the car
                                         
                                        You don't remember well if you didn't see that episode you wouldn't know but my mom was homeless and the cat lived in the car
                                         
                                        And when she picks me up from school one day the cat is in
                                         
                                        The back seat like you know that like little space like between the wind the back windshield and the seats
                                         
    
                                        There's like a little like flat area. Yeah, it's where like people used to keep beanie babies. Yes. Yes. Yes
                                         
                                        Yes, that's where that's where Salem would sit. Okay, wait
                                         
                                        I've got so many notes that I've taken just said like I don't miss any points while we have been going through this
                                         
                                        literal train wreck
                                         
                                        um
                                         
                                        But like
                                         
                                        Why the fuck were the cats in the car? I was gonna tell you so I did I didn't mention it on
                                         
                                        Maybe mama's but I didn't like it didn't get done yet. So now that it's been done. I'll tell you
                                         
    
                                        um
                                         
                                        I rescued the cats from the spca and I just was like freaking out about bugs and stuff like that
                                         
                                        So Kristen set up a flea bomb for me at the house and I wanted the to flea bomb the house because I just
                                         
                                        Felt gross and dirty and it was just like disgusted because yes, the spca is great
                                         
                                        but like they sometimes they don't treat the fleas and I just was freaked out so
                                         
                                        Um, we can't be in the house for four hours after they're done. So now they're here at the office with me
                                         
                                        Um, and so it's just been kind of a shit show and these cats in a cage
                                         
                                        They're in a little they were in a little carrier in my car, but now they're here at the office. So just like roaming
                                         
    
                                        Yeah, but like what if they shit is your litter box there? No, okay, so they're just gonna shit
                                         
                                        I've never been through this like I've never rescued a kitten and I've never
                                         
                                        um
                                         
                                        Had to do this. So this is my first time next time. I'll know
                                         
                                        Hopefully there won't be a next time to have a portable litter box in the event that we ever needed to do this
                                         
                                        Again, like wait, what's the cat count up to now? We have two inside plush plush your kitty. So
                                         
                                        Wow, that's a lot uh, it was just a lot this morning that shit going on
                                         
                                        Okay, wait, okay
                                         
    
                                        So we're gonna back up because there's a couple points that I want to talk about
                                         
                                        Um, the phone alarm thing. Yeah
                                         
                                        I think that any person who's listening to this is going to relate to this like very hard
                                         
                                        I think that you set the alarm and I think it does go off and I think that you
                                         
                                        Somehow turn it off in your sleep
                                         
                                        Forget that you did it and then you wake up and you're like, I never turned it off and something is glitching
                                         
                                        Who who said that it be glitching it be glitching. I don't know remember that
                                         
                                        No, I think it was Chris Lopez. Um, it be glitching. Um, the phone like I don't think it's glitching
                                         
    
                                        I think it's just
                                         
                                        Like you do it in your sleep and you don't realize that you did it
                                         
                                        This happened to me the other day and specifically that's how I know. Okay. Well, it is very frustrating also
                                         
                                        When it's possibly glitching or you just like turned it off
                                         
                                        That's the worst feeling in the world when you know that like you have things that you have to do
                                         
                                        And you wake up in a fluster and it's just like
                                         
                                        Why did I need to like turn that off or just like fuck up that early in the morning when I could have just come correct and
                                         
                                        Done the right things and I wouldn't be in such a fluster like running around here like this
                                         
    
                                        Well, I'm just thankful to whatever god people believe in that my
                                         
                                        Lucks and creed were angels this morning. They did not give me a hard time. I didn't have to yell
                                         
                                        I didn't raise my voice like trying to rush everybody at the house. Like they were extremely cooperative
                                         
                                        Um creed was not a baby alligator when I tried to change his diaper and put his new clothes on this morning
                                         
                                        He did a fantastic job
                                         
                                        And you know the appointment was at eight. I think we rolled up at the dentist at like 807
                                         
                                        So like I look like hell, but my kids were put together and ready to go
                                         
                                        I mean, it's always the best like when you look like hell. Okay, let me tell you one of my biggest fears
                                         
    
                                        And I still do it knowing that it's like my biggest fear
                                         
                                        And I've actually talked about this fear before
                                         
                                        um
                                         
                                        In the mornings whenever I get Jackson ready if I know that like I just need to come back home for a couple of minutes because I
                                         
                                        didn't have time to
                                         
                                        Fix my like workout drink or whatever. I'll just brush my teeth wash my face
                                         
                                        Brush out my hair still put it on top of my head, but at least it's brushed
                                         
                                        I will put on a cardigan
                                         
    
                                        Like with my pj's on the bottom and then drive him to school
                                         
                                        And if I get near like the red light near the school and it's like seven minutes before the tardybo
                                         
                                        I start panicking. I'm like
                                         
                                        What would I do like if I am dressed like this? I'm legitimately going to have to go back home
                                         
                                        Put on the clothes that I should have put on before I got in this car
                                         
                                        Um, and then take him back just like extra tardy
                                         
                                        Just give back extra tardy because I would have to
                                         
                                        Get out looking like like what does the parents do like what I I have played the scenario in my head so many times
                                         
    
                                        Like as I'm driving around and they've got like the little green sign going on at the school
                                         
                                        They've got the red sign like to stop and like your kids like get out here
                                         
                                        And there's you know, like all the attendants that are like, you know helping the kids get out of the car
                                         
                                        Like what I tell one of those other little kids who's helping Jackson get out of the car like hey
                                         
                                        I look like shit
                                         
                                        And I can't go in to sign the paper. So can you just like tell the principal that like is that what I would do?
                                         
                                        I've sent my kids in and I because Isaac's schedule was it was really weird
                                         
                                        Um, this year at first I was told he has to be there at 7 15
                                         
    
                                        And then the email that I got said 755 and then he told me that the he has to be in the classroom at 8 13
                                         
                                        So I was so confused by all of it. So the one day
                                         
                                        I we were late um, because I I really wasn't sure about the schedule
                                         
                                        And I said, I'm not walking you in so tell them that I drove off
                                         
                                        He did
                                         
                                        I need to mean he just sent me the thumbs up. So I mean, I wasn't getting out of the car every single day
                                         
                                        I get I dropped my kids off. I sometimes will stop to get breakfast
                                         
                                        Um, and then I'll either go back home and get ready or come to the office and get ready
                                         
    
                                        Um for that same reason, but also I was just complaining to Kristen
                                         
                                        About I love this school. So I hope anyone that works here
                                         
                                        Who may be listening, please don't take offense to this
                                         
                                        But for those reasons actually it was for a different reason
                                         
                                        And normally I feel this way because I look like shit, but yesterday when I dropped off creed
                                         
                                        I actually felt really bad for the other moms because they are pulling
                                         
                                        strollers out of their trunks no
                                         
                                        To walk into the school to drop off their toddlers and their hands are full
                                         
    
                                        So they have to have the stroller. They have to have their toddler
                                         
                                        They have
                                         
                                        Backpacks and lunches and a bottle and this that and the third and then when they get there
                                         
                                        What if they do with their class or their childlers classroom is upstairs, then they have to leave the stroller at the front desk
                                         
                                        And I'm like for as much as we pay in tuition
                                         
                                        There should be some sort of drop-off system outside in the morning
                                         
                                        Yes, absolutely. I've had four kids go through this school and I
                                         
                                        Again, I hope that this is just constructive criticism and I love you all. So please
                                         
    
                                        Please don't yell at me if you see me at pickup
                                         
                                        Um, but just one of those things where I'm like, we pay so much
                                         
                                        Why don't they have a drop-off system like that?
                                         
                                        So these moms don't have to get their newborns out of the car
                                         
                                        In my opinion, I'm like it would be better for everyone in the like
                                         
                                        Preschool or daycare system if like the parents aren't coming in because you have less traffic coming in and out
                                         
                                        And less upset for the kids the transition period with the kids like is less because they're not seeing
                                         
                                        Mom or dad like at the classroom and then leaving them
                                         
    
                                        right
                                         
                                        There's a lot of of benefits of that but it's more work for them. But at the same time, it's like
                                         
                                        It's happening at free public schools. Why is it not happening at the private school that I pay?
                                         
                                        Thousands for my kids to go to it's just frustrating the whole the whole thing about kids. It's just frustrating to be honest
                                         
                                        So from cringing at the pump to getting an eye popping check at your favorite restaurant
                                         
                                        Inflation is hitting us where it all hurts and it really hurts, especially me because I have four kids
                                         
                                        And we go everywhere. So that's why I started using upside. Thankfully, Kristen told me about upside
                                         
                                        It's an incredible app for anyone who buys gas groceries or dines out. So with every purchase, I'm earning cash back
                                         
    
                                        Thanks to upside also
                                         
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                                        Loves this app so much
                                         
                                        He was using it when we were on our way back from Orlando and it is so cool
                                         
                                        To be able to save money and to be able to just get cash back. It's so awesome
                                         
                                        He's been using it since Kristen told us about it
                                         
                                        And I think it's absolutely amazing anytime that you're saving money or getting money just by using an app like this
                                         
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                                        Cash back on your first purchase of ten dollars or more
                                         
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                                        Using promo code coffee combos
                                         
                                        But back to the dentist as you were saying that
                                         
                                        Javi was like rolling his eyes or whatever
                                         
                                        I don't know if it's like a mom
                                         
                                        Thing in general or if it's a mom of boys
                                         
                                        But I am like that with Jackson and it also drives
                                         
    
                                        Will nuts and he is like you need to stop babying him. He's like I was feeding into it. Yeah
                                         
                                        Yeah, like all the time. And so I think that just might be like a dad thing or
                                         
                                        Definitely like an ex-husband thing
                                         
                                        Um, also, I think if they had daughters, they would be that way with their daughters. Yeah, exactly. So like why are you judging?
                                         
                                        It was just because I think the eye rolls were more towards me than they were turned towards Lincoln
                                         
                                        Oh, they were for sure
                                         
                                        Like because I'm like rubbing his legs holding his
                                         
                                        Hey, it wasn't even that like but I get it. It's scary, you know, you don't you're getting a needle put in your mouth
                                         
    
                                        Like I get it also
                                         
                                        I need to know anyone who's listening if you would rather have dental work done
                                         
                                        Or rather go to the general physician and get shots because I am choosing general physician to get shots all day every day
                                         
                                        I hate to have dental work done
                                         
                                        Um, I'm just not a fan of it. I do like to go and get a teeth cleaning
                                         
                                        But I don't like when they like start strolling around your grill
                                         
                                        Doing those numbers and shit because I'm like, oh, does that number mean cavity?
                                         
                                        Like because I know that I'm gonna have to roll back up in here and get a shot in my mouth
                                         
    
                                        And it's just not something that I'm looking forward to
                                         
                                        Um at that point. I'm just like, let me just get dentures
                                         
                                        I've thought about that. I'm like, honestly, should I instead of the lumineers that I got should I
                                         
                                        Fucking shave all my teeth down and get the nears, but um, I would also pick the physician because at the dentist number one
                                         
                                        You really can't see what's being done. Um, and if you did it's probably will freak you out more
                                         
                                        And it's just the sounds of everything
                                         
                                        Even though they numb you
                                         
                                        For certain things you can still hear them and I think the sounds freak me out more
                                         
    
                                        So I would with science and like the way that technology has come along
                                         
                                        It's always made me think every time that I go to the dentist
                                         
                                        I think this thought every single time I go
                                         
                                        Why have you guys not figured out
                                         
                                        How to make these tools silent because that's part of the problem. It's like the screeching. It's like
                                         
                                        I literally thought that today because I was like poor Lincoln into the sound for him
                                         
                                        Also, I have a video that we are going to share of
                                         
                                        Jackson and myself trying to pull one of his top teeth. He was
                                         
    
                                        on a call
                                         
                                        with will
                                         
                                        yesterday and
                                         
                                        I was like, I need to get this tooth out before
                                         
                                        I leave town because I don't want him to lose his first top tooth
                                         
                                        At your house without me being there and it made me think of like
                                         
                                        Parents who have co-parented forever and like one parent's always missing out on something, you know
                                         
                                        Yeah, it's like he loses if he loses that little damn tooth that I've been waiting so long for it to come out
                                         
    
                                        And I'm not there
                                         
                                        That's gonna be like a bad experience for me. Yes
                                         
                                        So I tried to pull it. I got out dental floss tighter around it. I was like, I will buy you v-bucks if
                                         
                                        You let me get it out before you go
                                         
                                        And of course wills like you just want to have the video like you just want this you just want that and I'm like, no like
                                         
                                        It's truly not because I want you to miss out
                                         
                                        I'm literally like you can come over here and also pull it with me
                                         
                                        Like I don't even care like we don't even like each other
                                         
    
                                        But like you want to roll up in here and pull the fucking tooth like cool
                                         
                                        As long as you get to be there and experience it
                                         
                                        Yeah, like I don't even care and I'm like trying to come up with cool ideas and Jackson's like, oh, let's tie it to a basket ball
                                         
                                        Um, and then we'll just like throw the ball and it'll fall out
                                         
                                        But I don't want to see the blood and I'm like, well, that's a surefire way of like splattering the walls
                                         
                                        Um, we did the football with Lincoln, but was it bad? No, it was he
                                         
                                        We didn't even know it came out until we
                                         
                                        Lincoln like checked in his mouth and it was he's like it's out and then we had to find it on the floor and it was
                                         
    
                                        Still attached to the dental floss. It worked. So the basketball could work
                                         
                                        Well, I'm telling you this is a public service announcement specifically to my ex-husband that if he tries to pull that tooth
                                         
                                        While I'm out of town
                                         
                                        When he specifically told me Lindsay stopped trying to pull the tooth because it's not ready
                                         
                                        Um, everybody heard it here first. So I will bitch about it in a future episode if that happens
                                         
                                        So just in case anybody need to know also the other thing that I wanted to say before we like completely move on
                                         
                                        Um is about the cats in the car and your mom having Salem like riding on that like flat part
                                         
                                        I always used to wonder like why people put beanie babies back there and like stuffed animals
                                         
    
                                        And I still wonder that every time I see it and it's the same thing that I wonder about why people put bumper stickers on their cars
                                         
                                        Also the bobble heads on the dashboard. Yeah, like what possessed people to do this?
                                         
                                        It's probably literally like every thing. It's probably every single person that
                                         
                                        Um is listening to this podcast or like Lindsay I roll around the beanie baby like in the back
                                         
                                        But like why like is that uh collectors?
                                         
                                        Uh landing or like what like what is that?
                                         
                                        Like what tell me like you know the answer
                                         
                                        say something like that like
                                         
    
                                        tattoos on someone's body or like bumper stickers on a Bentley or something like that yet
                                         
                                        They were with two very tatted people. So they must like a bumper sticker on a Bentley. I mean
                                         
                                        I just don't get it. But like tell me why did you have you never wondered this like when you're just strolling down the freeway?
                                         
                                        And or like you're stopped in a red light and you see
                                         
                                        literal like bumper stickers all over the back of someone's car and you're like, oh well like at what point did you start doing that?
                                         
                                        And at what point did it become like this collection?
                                         
                                        And also at what point did you think that you were going to want to look at this for the rest of forever?
                                         
                                        Or do they like like it? I used to think like like I have cute license plate holders and um
                                         
    
                                        I used to hang a crystal from my rear view mirror, but like that's as far as I would go
                                         
                                        Now I don't have anything um on my rear view mirror and nothing on my dash or anything. Um,
                                         
                                        I don't know. Maybe some people just like it
                                         
                                        I'm thinking that Salem was back there because it was basically like sunbathing. I'm gonna google and see what picture. Um
                                         
                                        Kale, Lowry, mom, cat, car. Let's see what comes up. Also like was this your mom's like companion?
                                         
                                        She was home. You said she was homeless and she just like had a car?
                                         
                                        Yeah, she was like living in a hotel and then um also in the car.
                                         
                                        But did she get the cat prior to like living in the hotel and the car?
                                         
    
                                        Yeah, we had it. We had it at an apartment. Um
                                         
                                        But we got evicted from that apartment and I was a it was right before I lived with Joe
                                         
                                        So I was a sophomore in high school and Salem was in the apartment
                                         
                                        But then when we got evicted my mom kept the cat in the car
                                         
                                        Okay, well someone will find it
                                         
                                        While you're looking that up or we're just encouraging people to do the work for us
                                         
                                        Um when I say this like someone, please find it and send me the photos because I would love to see it
                                         
                                        I found it. Oh, you did. Are you gonna send it to me right now? Yeah, okay
                                         
    
                                        I've got my phone open ready to go
                                         
                                        Yeah, I have acne all over my face. Um, we're gonna post this photo. This why does this say
                                         
                                        First of all, they have the details already. Okay. Okay. Okay. It says
                                         
                                        Katelyn says her mom has struggled a lot
                                         
                                        And now she's living in a hotel with her boyfriend. She also has a car cat
                                         
                                        Um, I'm not from Nazareth, Pennsylvania for any of you guys listening. I've never been from Nazareth, Pennsylvania
                                         
                                        I went I literally lived there for a year and a half. Why did it take so long? Were you photoshopping this? No, I was
                                         
                                        I wish it was photoshopped. That's so embarrassing. Okay, hold on. Let me see
                                         
    
                                        Oh my gosh, I see the cat in the in the back part that you're talking about. I told you
                                         
                                        First of all black cats cats in general just freaked me out. Um, like I told you guys before like the spines and shit
                                         
                                        like are just like really weird and
                                         
                                        And that to me
                                         
                                        Being a black cat like sitting on that landing
                                         
                                        And then seeing your face look like that traumatizes me
                                         
                                        So now that I've experienced that trauma on today's episode of coffee humboss podcast
                                         
                                        I want to talk about the Kardashians. I know that you had something to say about kim, but
                                         
    
                                        I was just scrolling through Courtney's
                                         
                                        Instagram story
                                         
                                        And I saw where she
                                         
                                        Said it was like her car pool
                                         
                                        Look, and I want to let you know like if the Kardashian said it
                                         
                                        It's the bible. So it's carpool. I'm looking right now. Um
                                         
                                        At her story just because you said I don't follow any of them
                                         
                                        but I
                                         
    
                                        have fallen in love with all of them over the last several weeks and
                                         
                                        I'm just like not really willing to say anything negative
                                         
                                        At this point like I just love them so much. I like hate that I love them, but also love that I
                                         
                                        I don't know
                                         
                                        Courtney looks great. I see all her lemmy stuff
                                         
                                        um actually watched an interview yesterday of kim on regis and
                                         
                                        Ryan not regis and ryan. Oh my god. Kelly and ryan
                                         
                                        Regis and ryan goodbye
                                         
    
                                        That sounded good though. Um rest in peace regis. Um
                                         
                                        Kim was saying how all the kids go to the same school and she sees all her kiss
                                         
                                        Kisses she sees all her sisters in the drop-off line and stuff and I just think that's so cool that like
                                         
                                        They're one letting the kids go to public school because I feel like that's an experience that a bunch like kids do need to
                                         
                                        You know, at least experience it. I know there's homeschool too, but
                                         
                                        um, and then she sees them all in the in the drop-off line
                                         
                                        But I actually had kim on my list of topics because this photo
                                         
                                        When it's going viral, I'll send it to you. Okay, and it's from it's kim in 2017 and then kim in 2022
                                         
    
                                        Her hair is the same, but her body is not the same
                                         
                                        She looked great both ways, but I wonder like is this like
                                         
                                        Is she setting a new trend like is that what's happening? I think that anything that the kardashians does
                                         
                                        Sets a trend like
                                         
                                        They made
                                         
                                        Curvy and big booties fetch like they made it happen
                                         
                                        To me. I feel like because they did it's never gonna go out like I just think that they just
                                         
                                        really set the bar and
                                         
    
                                        I love it. I love it so much now
                                         
                                        They're all I think they've all like kind of been into working out for
                                         
                                        A long time because I've seen them like in workout stuff like on their instagrams for a long time
                                         
                                        but now it's like more to an extreme and
                                         
                                        specifically like kim and chloe now they are just like so thin and fit and
                                         
                                        their
                                         
                                        butts look smaller and I think that they looked great both ways though. Yeah, I also think they look good both ways
                                         
                                        I just was um
                                         
    
                                        Like I knew kim had lost a ton of weight, but I didn't until I saw that picture and it put it in perspective a little bit
                                         
                                        I didn't realize how drastic it was
                                         
                                        Um, I think that I think that she looked great literally both ways. I think it's just a different phase of her life
                                         
                                        100% I need you to go and look in um our group chat right now and look at courtney kardashian and where she
                                         
                                        Says that it's her car pool look not car rider
                                         
                                        Her car pool look and then also me on the same day and my car pool look. So basically I am courting kardashian
                                         
                                        Oh, oh twins 100%
                                         
                                        Yeah, love that for us. So now now are you surrendering?
                                         
    
                                        Surrendering on carpool a kardashian said it. So it's bible. It's not car. It's not carpool. It will never be carpool
                                         
                                        So many people say that um, that's like one memorable thing that people always call me out on is like the carpool thing
                                         
                                        But then I guess my parents said it on their podcast
                                         
                                        So then I was like right all of a sudden because my parents said it and now that courtney kardashian said it
                                         
                                        I feel like I'm even more right
                                         
                                        But I also understand why people say that it's like car rider and not not carpool because when you carpool with someone
                                         
                                        It's like multiple people getting in the same car to go to a destination. I guess and when I think of carpool
                                         
                                        I'm not thinking of like because like, you know in california
                                         
    
                                        They have carpool lanes and I'm not thinking of
                                         
                                        Me and my kids going to a drop-off line. I'm thinking
                                         
                                        Multiple people going to work carpooling to work. Yeah. Yeah, that's what I think of
                                         
                                        All right, you guys
                                         
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                                        Jackson has a bunch of their stuff
                                         
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                                        I need to tell you this is like completely unrelated
                                         
    
                                        But i'm so glad that I am back home like I love going on vacation and I was talking about this on the southern tea
                                         
                                        Like I like going somewhere, but I'm good at like three or four days and then I'm ready to come back home to like my own personal dwelling
                                         
                                        um
                                         
                                        but
                                         
                                        Suburban dad came down for my birthday weekend, but then went home worked
                                         
                                        Grabbed his youngest daughter and drove back and then we did disney and I know that like you hate disney or whatever
                                         
                                        But I love it and got like really cute pictures and it was just like a really fun time very much enjoyed it
                                         
                                        but we went and took the kids to dinner pretty much every night and the first night we went to japanese
                                         
    
                                        and we're just like sitting there and enjoying our meal
                                         
                                        and Suburban dad leaned over to like tell me a secret and I'm like, huh?
                                         
                                        and he says it again
                                         
                                        And literally tells me like, okay, so you know how it's like
                                         
                                        A table that you sit with like other families or like other people there, right?
                                         
                                        Yep
                                         
                                        So we have like the four the four of us have the seats that are facing the grill and then there is
                                         
                                        a set of women like on one side and like a cup this couple on the other side
                                         
    
                                        And his butt was like facing this couple the whole time
                                         
                                        Because he's like turned into you guys. Yeah, he was like turned into us, right?
                                         
                                        Okay
                                         
                                        I was thinking to myself like maybe he was just like trying to be close or something like that and like super engaged
                                         
                                        And the conversation that we're having no he literally leans over and says I've been crop dusting these people the whole time
                                         
                                        I'm gonna vomit this poor couple
                                         
                                        Is
                                         
                                        Trying to eat and they're smelling his ass ripping. Yes. Yeah, and I'm like pardon like you
                                         
    
                                        Pardon and he's like. Oh my god. Yeah, I've been crop dusting these people the whole time
                                         
                                        And I'm like, no, you've just been shitting on them crop dusting
                                         
                                        It's literally like where you fart and like walk around away and then you're like away
                                         
                                        um
                                         
                                        No, literally was just like eight his farts for dinner. They literally were eating his farts for dinner and like I am scared
                                         
                                        This poor couple was problem. Oh this poor couple
                                         
                                        Suburban dad I was gonna call him hot neighbor
                                         
                                        Suburban dad needs to get it together or he needs to take an ammonium before dinner next time
                                         
    
                                        like so so foul and just
                                         
                                        gross and then um
                                         
                                        somehow we got on the topic like later because I was just like laughing about this
                                         
                                        And he tells me that
                                         
                                        every
                                         
                                        Guy his
                                         
                                        Sharded themselves
                                         
                                        That's what he tells me. He's like every believe that every man
                                         
    
                                        I don't know that every single man will admit it, but I definitely believe that and I'm like wait
                                         
                                        so like you regularly shit yourself or like
                                         
                                        Like what happens here and he's like no, I mean I'm just like
                                         
                                        Sharded before like I farted and just like shit by accident
                                         
                                        I haven't done that in a really
                                         
                                        Wait, you've done that. No, I have I've actually never sharded
                                         
                                        Um, but like full blown shit myself hasn't happened in quite some time. So I'm I'm very um
                                         
                                        I don't know if I'm getting my diet under control or I'm not as I don't know as anxious maybe
                                         
    
                                        But I have not done that in a long time, but I definitely agree with him
                                         
                                        I do believe that every not every man's gonna admit it though
                                         
                                        But why wouldn't they admit it like some some are super like
                                         
                                        But I guess he's the same way like super clean cut like my ex. I'm not gonna name which one
                                         
                                        But you guys could probably guess he said he's never done it and I don't believe him because he's like a bigger guy
                                         
                                        Um, but he's super clean cut and he said he's never done it and I just don't I don't believe him
                                         
                                        I I want to say that like every
                                         
                                        Man probably does it like pretty regularly if they were being honest because the way they start
                                         
    
                                        It's just like so
                                         
                                        Totally different. Oh and suburban dad was like in the shower. I'm so calling him out right now
                                         
                                        He was in the shower and like he went to laugh about something and I guess like when he went to laugh
                                         
                                        Like he just farted and I was like wait, did you just fart like?
                                         
                                        Why is it not okay?
                                         
                                        my worst fear is like if I'm having sex or
                                         
                                        coming get like off getting off the
                                         
                                        the dick
                                         
    
                                        Um, and I que for fart like there's a lot of pressure there. So you just like don't know what's gonna happen and I just
                                         
                                        Get very insecure and like get to the bathroom as fast as possible in case I have to like que for fart and I just
                                         
                                        It's a lot
                                         
                                        You know wait, so does this like regularly happen like you're literally has never happened. I'm just scared of it happening
                                         
                                        Oh my god, that's literally traumatizing. Could you imagine just like
                                         
                                        Hopping off and then just like a massive queef
                                         
                                        No, that has happened to me
                                         
                                        But farting has not well, how would they know the difference?
                                         
    
                                        Well, I was back to the conversation pretty bad
                                         
                                        This goes back to the conversation that we had do men know the difference between a queef and a fart
                                         
                                        I guess one smells and remember I was like, well, does one smell like the vagina and then like one smells like ball hole
                                         
                                        I would think so. Yeah. No, I think queefs don't have a smell. They might smell like sex
                                         
                                        Oh, that's so foul. Yeah
                                         
                                        Um, would you like to tell us about your meltdown?
                                         
                                        Yeah, I'll tell you all about my meltdown. I was having
                                         
                                        So christen and I do this thing called friends after five where I just really try my best
                                         
    
                                        To not text her about anything more related
                                         
                                        after five
                                         
                                        that being said
                                         
                                        I have a lot of I still rock creed to sleep every night. Um
                                         
                                        There's something I do. I like to do it. It's like my time with just him because of all the chaos
                                         
                                        But I also have a lot of thoughts
                                         
                                        I do a lot of thinking because sometimes it takes 30 minutes. Sometimes it takes an hour
                                         
                                        Last night it took two hours. Um
                                         
    
                                        Which was weird because he had like such a crazy day. I think he was still like also operating off of adrenaline
                                         
                                        Um
                                         
                                        So I'm sitting there rocking him and I just I'm looking at him
                                         
                                        He can't see me because it's so dark. I can barely see him, but I'm just like
                                         
                                        I love being a mom so much even
                                         
                                        through all of my depression and the hard times and all the chaos and
                                         
                                        I'm looking at him and I'm just so proud of him and then I'm like crying. I start crying because I'm like
                                         
                                        I need to update my will. Um, what am I going to do if something happens to me if I die?
                                         
    
                                        Um, I have a living will
                                         
                                        Um, but at the time when I did it, I put
                                         
                                        My cousin in charge of certain things and you know
                                         
                                        The kids custody is up in the air if something were to happen to me and so
                                         
                                        I texted christen and I'm like, I I don't know what to do. I'm having all these thoughts. I can truce of thoughts
                                         
                                        Um, I need to update my will. I need to change a couple things. I want to leave my house to natalie
                                         
                                        so that way
                                         
                                        She can keep lux and creed in the same school and keep them on the same schedule
                                         
    
                                        And they can still go to chris and they can still see their brothers and like was just having all of I don't even know
                                         
                                        Where they came from
                                         
                                        But when I tell you that I sobbed for a full hour and then I was fine
                                         
                                        It was the craziest
                                         
                                        Like I feel like they're valid because we're moms, right?
                                         
                                        Like even with Jackson you probably look at him sometimes and you're like you just love this person
                                         
                                        So much that you would do anything for them and you can't
                                         
                                        picture your life if something were to happen to you or him
                                         
    
                                        And so but then they go away
                                         
                                        But I think that's part of a depression and anxiety a little bit is like the the level that it got to like I was sobbing
                                         
                                        I'm holding him. I'm crying. I'm texting christen about if I like it was just a lot for me
                                         
                                        And then I was literally like 30 minutes after I like laid him down in his crib. I was fine
                                         
                                        But it was just I remember it was very when we talked about
                                         
                                        I think it was like a long time ago, but we talked about um
                                         
                                        How I would like drive the car because I was like afraid I was going to get in a car crash
                                         
                                        I would like drive it like near the shoulder of the road. So like yep if somebody was oncoming like I was just like terrified of this
                                         
    
                                        um, when you have these like
                                         
                                        Overwhelming intrusive thoughts as a mom
                                         
                                        It can be so overwhelming and so emotionally consuming that you do get to the point of those breakdowns because you're like, okay
                                         
                                        I have all of these things on my plate
                                         
                                        and I know I've created these little humans in my case this little human and
                                         
                                        I know how much I do for
                                         
                                        These kids or this child right and I don't know what life would look like for them if I wasn't here
                                         
                                        right, um
                                         
    
                                        I oftentimes get these intrusive thoughts when I see like stories in the news. So like
                                         
                                        um
                                         
                                        mom suddenly passes away or something like that and then there's like these gofundmes or whatever for
                                         
                                        Her significant other parents or whatever for like the raising of these kids
                                         
                                        And then I start thinking about like, okay. Well, what if that was me?
                                         
                                        Like what if I just like suddenly passed away?
                                         
                                        What would happen like I know all the things that I do and I'm sure you feel like that with creed
                                         
                                        And you know, especially him because he's the youngest, but all of your kids and then the
                                         
    
                                        complexity of the situation with him having different dads and the pressure of knowing
                                         
                                        Like would my kids be able to see each other if something happens to me
                                         
                                        That is especially something that I'm like because it's not always this deep about like if I die
                                         
                                        um
                                         
                                        sometimes
                                         
                                        The most recent one before that was me just like and I don't want to start crying. Um
                                         
                                        Um, so hold on. Um
                                         
                                        Just like holding him and apologizing and I do it with lux too, but lux will mainly be asleep
                                         
    
                                        Um, why am I getting emotional because I'm fine. Um, I'm fine. I don't want anyone listening to this like you can get emotional because it is emotional
                                         
                                        but I
                                         
                                        What was it? It was the other day and I just started like bawling my eyes out just like
                                         
                                        I'm so sorry for all this the mistakes that I've made and I'm like I
                                         
                                        I I know that my mistakes will affect them in some way or
                                         
                                        They might have to recover from them
                                         
                                        But like at the end of the day like we're all doing the best we can and
                                         
                                        I love them so much and I'm and I am sorry because I when I make choices
                                         
    
                                        I don't I don't make them with the intentions of like fucking up my kids or like traumatizing my kids, you know
                                         
                                        And so I'm always apologizing to them, but I'll hold them and I'll apologize to them and then I think oh my god
                                         
                                        Am I traumatizing them now because they don't understand what?
                                         
                                        They don't understand what I'm saying or you know what I mean like they don't get why I'm crying like Lincoln
                                         
                                        He he just like it's not his job to comfort me, but he like rubbed my back and he's like we love you
                                         
                                        It's okay, and I'm like
                                         
                                        They're just I don't know if I make it worse. I don't know if it's good that I'm apologizing
                                         
                                        I don't know
                                         
    
                                        but that was like like when you make adult decisions and then
                                         
                                        When you have kids that are old enough like Isaac and Lincoln and now Lux can like see things and
                                         
                                        You start apologizing for stuff that were adult decisions. It's like
                                         
                                        Should we apologize to our kids? We should normalize
                                         
                                        Apologizing to our children for things that we expose them to that was not by choice for them
                                         
                                        but also
                                         
                                        Are we apologizing for things that are things that they can't mentally
                                         
                                        Fully understand right I try not to do that, but it's more like
                                         
    
                                        um
                                         
                                        I try not to apologize for things that they don't fully understand right now, but um
                                         
                                        I have definitely apologized for like I think that day that the most recent one
                                         
                                        It was like I didn't feel good or something because I have
                                         
                                        Um, I do have depression. So I still have bad days and this one particular day
                                         
                                        I was just so tired and I you know
                                         
                                        I couldn't figure my life out that day for the life of me and it was just like one of those things where it's like
                                         
                                        I felt bad that I wasn't doing more for them
                                         
    
                                        I was actually having a conversation when we were in Orlando with suburban dad about
                                         
                                        Just like raising kids in general and I think as parents
                                         
                                        We try our best every single day or for the most part, you know parents who are choosing to raise their kids
                                         
                                        Are trying their best to put the best foot forward every single day
                                         
                                        And sometimes you come up short and you'll just find yourself like crying at the end of the night
                                         
                                        Like I could have done that so much better. I could have handled that situation so much better
                                         
                                        And you just get so overwhelmed in the feeling of like did I
                                         
                                        Mess up so bad in that moment that it's going to affect them for the rest of their life
                                         
    
                                        And I think you have to realize that it's just like a blip on the map. It's not
                                         
                                        It's always not something unless it's like extremely traumatic
                                         
                                        It's always not something that they might even remember in the morning by the time that they wake up
                                         
                                        but as parents
                                         
                                        Who put their kids first and want the best for their kids and their priority or their children
                                         
                                        I think it's a natural thing to think like man. I could have done that so much better and just be hard on yourself
                                         
                                        Yeah, I agreed. I definitely agree with that. I am
                                         
                                        I don't think that it's talked about enough like the mom guilt
                                         
    
                                        Um, or like we see all these highlight reels on social media of how fun it is to be a mom
                                         
                                        And and of course it is it can be
                                         
                                        Um, and but we also no matter how good things are we still have these thoughts like are we doing enough? Are we?
                                         
                                        Um, you know, could we are we lacking in some area?
                                         
                                        Could we do better in another area?
                                         
                                        And I I just want to make sure that you know my kids
                                         
                                        I know my kids are gonna have to heal from trauma
                                         
                                        But I don't want them to heal from have to heal from trauma that I cause over and over and over again
                                         
    
                                        You know, like I'm working on it and I'm hoping that
                                         
                                        I don't know. I wish moms would talk about that part more. I feel like
                                         
                                        We all make mistakes in life, right? Like
                                         
                                        There's always going to be something that you look back on and you're like I could have done that so much better or
                                         
                                        I totally shouldn't have done that and I shouldn't have done that
                                         
                                        and involved a child and even if it was
                                         
                                        Is involving a child without really involving them, but it had an effect on them in some way by making the decision that you make
                                         
                                        I think that you have to look at the progress that you have made from
                                         
    
                                        Where you came from from 16 and pregnant and you're raising and then what you're doing with your kids
                                         
                                        And really look at the progress that you aren't repeating same mistakes
                                         
                                        There are certain things that you might do that is trauma response from what you experienced through your childhood
                                         
                                        But you're not doing the same things that were done to you and for that you're blessed
                                         
                                        Listen, I'm always going to try to do better
                                         
                                        I might like fuck up sometimes along the way, but I'm I'm going to I'm going to try to do
                                         
                                        You know what I mean? Like I'm going to do my best and
                                         
                                        Um, I guess that's all we can do right like that's that's the best we can do. I am proud of you
                                         
    
                                        I will say I'm proud of you also
                                         
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                                        um, we do have a bunch of stuff that has been going on in the facebook group and I had just
                                         
                                        Gone through the facebook group and decided to put some stuff together
                                         
                                        Of things that various people wanted to know so we're going to run through that really quick just to like catch up with everyone
                                         
                                        um, but a big topic in there was
                                         
                                        about talking about influencers seemingly having endless money supply and
                                         
                                        Constant saw this one and I responded. Yeah, like constant thought of what am I doing wrong?
                                         
                                        And what are our thoughts on this? It said that these chicks and their new clothes constant home renovations
                                         
                                        restaurants to restaurants trip to the next trip husbands just home chilling date nights
                                         
    
                                        Um, I need to delete social media because I'm like so stressed
                                         
                                        And then people feeling like it's just all fake because the stories just like are never ending posted daily
                                         
                                        Um, their lives aren't stressful, but playing an office stressful. Um,
                                         
                                        Yeah, so I have a lot to say about it. Um, and I think there's like
                                         
                                        Some positive things that I have to say but then also some negative things because I have also
                                         
                                        Had these feelings and I also want to say that when I comment on this
                                         
                                        I'm sure that people have looked at my page and
                                         
                                        Felt certain things about this, you know, like if I'm carrying a bag or if I'm on my stories and my makeup's done
                                         
    
                                        And I'm like on vacation. I want to preface
                                         
                                        this with a lot of times
                                         
                                        I think that
                                         
                                        People share all the good things because they want people to see all the good and to try to be like a
                                         
                                        Positive light in someone's day that could you know, potentially be gloomy and when they're tuning into
                                         
                                        your pages or your podcast or whatever
                                         
                                        Um, they want you to get something that like feels good
                                         
                                        But what I've learned over time
                                         
    
                                        Is that a lot of times people don't relate to the feel good stuff
                                         
                                        They're relating to your struggles that look like
                                         
                                        their struggles
                                         
                                        And so it is hard when you're on their
                                         
                                        Shareing things that are outside of someone's budget
                                         
                                        Um
                                         
                                        Things that other people would
                                         
                                        Potentially have to save for like a very long period of time to be able to do these home renovations if they could ever do them
                                         
    
                                        And so sometimes it does come across as bragging right or or inauthentic almost
                                         
                                        Yeah, um
                                         
                                        I've also I think that people would consider some people may consider me an influencer
                                         
                                        um
                                         
                                        But I've also had these same thoughts because I look at other influencers or
                                         
                                        Other people that I've met in the industry and they have way more than I do and
                                         
                                        I'm just like what am I doing wrong and I can't tell you how many times I've gone to christen and said
                                         
                                        Why can this person do this and I can't and I I get it I do I get it
                                         
    
                                        You know and I it's one of those like I didn't get a credit card until literally last year
                                         
                                        So or that might have been this year
                                         
                                        I was talking about on the southern tee about like watching some of my blogger girlfriends like over the weekend because I always feel like blogger
                                         
                                        um women are always so ahead on
                                         
                                        Like purchasing clothes for the season and the trends everything. Yep
                                         
                                        Yep decorating like way before you have time to be able to do it
                                         
                                        but I think that people
                                         
                                        Have to look at that this is their jobs and like what they're doing is
                                         
    
                                        completing a work task almost
                                         
                                        and
                                         
                                        It just kind of comes off as
                                         
                                        Like this is just a luxury thing that they have the luxury of being able to do
                                         
                                        But truly when they're linking this stuff and whatever they're also making money off of it. And so
                                         
                                        I think that it can become distorted a little bit like in that way
                                         
                                        I just like share the stuff that I actually
                                         
                                        Like pretty much like my fake fiddle figs like keel would never have these but like I'm
                                         
    
                                        Probably going to share them because they still look great like in my house like none of them have dead leaves falling off
                                         
                                        And I don't have root rot. So it's like
                                         
                                        And no, what are they called gnats?
                                         
                                        Yeah, like the gnats the whatever we
                                         
                                        Determined that those things were that I had to use for kanzivo to like capture all of them
                                         
                                        um
                                         
                                        But yeah, like I try to share things that I am actually using and I'm trying to get better about
                                         
                                        finding affordable or like more affordable
                                         
    
                                        products to be able to share and now that you can like link
                                         
                                        Home goods and like tj max and stuff like finding stuff like that to be able to link and then also
                                         
                                        I don't go overboard with anything like I'm more like a minimalist keel knows this about me and so
                                         
                                        A little bit goes a long way for me. So sometimes I do think that when people are seeing blogger girls
                                         
                                        Hosting stuff that they feel like it's overkill and like there's never any way that they would be able to do it
                                         
                                        Because all that stuff is so expensive. I do want to say
                                         
                                        Sometimes things that they're sharing. It's probably also gifted to them by I was going to say that next a lot of it is
                                         
                                        Influencers are getting
                                         
    
                                        Products and things like that sent to them solely for being influencers. And so they may not have paid the full thing
                                         
                                        Um, I'm not saying that's the case for everything
                                         
                                        But I watched a tiktok yesterday of an influencer that I follow and I love him
                                         
                                        Um, and he said and this is gonna he was showing a tour of his new house that he was able to buy from being an influencer
                                         
                                        And that's really cool. But it is a full-time job for him
                                         
                                        That is his full-time job is creating content to advertise and companies do have to pay for advertising
                                         
                                        so
                                         
                                        With social media being as prevalent as it is
                                         
    
                                        That is where companies are marketing. So they're going to find
                                         
                                        Influencers or people creators whoever who are willing to share their products and get you know word of mouth out get the videos out
                                         
                                        That is it's basically like the new version of commercials, right?
                                         
                                        Like we all saw those 1 800 commercials when we were kids about the color
                                         
                                        Pages and things like that. That's what they're doing now for social media and for content creators
                                         
                                        So it's their job and then secondly, so let me go back to what he he bought a house
                                         
                                        He's he's an um a social media creator content creator and he said he was showing a closet his guest room or something like that
                                         
                                        And it was like and this is where I'm going to put all my pr packages and do giveaways for you guys
                                         
    
                                        So their send companies are sending him products to market and advertise for them
                                         
                                        Um, so today you don't really need a marketing or advertising degree to be able to do those things
                                         
                                        And I think that that kind of gets lost in the sauce a little bit
                                         
                                        Um, you know, there's a ton of things that I have that I didn't buy that you know companies did send them to me
                                         
                                        Um, and I'm thankful and I can share them and I can say I really like it or I don't like it
                                         
                                        Whatever the case is, but I don't want people to get caught up in the you know, I wish I had this
                                         
                                        I wish I could do that
                                         
                                        It's like a comparison game, right and like keeping up with the Joneses
                                         
    
                                        Like I need to do this because they did this or you know, like I wish my front porch looked like this with all these
                                         
                                        Fucking paper bats that like I'm truly not going to spend that much time like doing that
                                         
                                        But like I love that someone else did it
                                         
                                        Um, I think that you just have to take it in stride and just realize that like these are people's jobs
                                         
                                        Um, the last thing that I want to talk about on this topic is husbands at home just chilling
                                         
                                        A lot of these women make millions of dollars a year
                                         
                                        Um, that you see that are posting in this way and the stories are never ending
                                         
                                        And so it has afforded for their husbands to be able to be at home
                                         
    
                                        Um, and leave their jobs and that's just
                                         
                                        The reality of it. Um, would I ever want my husband to be at home?
                                         
                                        And working with me, um, maybe if the season was right in life
                                         
                                        But then also I like having my own thing and someone else having their own thing
                                         
                                        And if they were kind of getting like their own deals and whatever that would be one thing
                                         
                                        But like I don't I don't really care to like necessarily do that. So
                                         
                                        Um, just wanted to say that rant over
                                         
                                        um
                                         
    
                                        The other thing that I wanted to talk about that was in the facebook group is
                                         
                                        Um, this person put hey guys, I just had a baby eight weeks ago
                                         
                                        And I really think that I'm struggling struggling with postpartum anxiety
                                         
                                        I know lindsay has mentioned it but has anyone else dealt with this issues
                                         
                                        What steps did you take my doctor didn't even mention any postpartum issues at my six week checkup, which I thought was odd
                                         
                                        I'm just struggling
                                         
                                        Um, I'm getting ready to go back to work in a couple of weeks and would like to have at least something figured out by then
                                         
                                        Um postpartum anxiety and postpartum depression to me are very different and present very differently
                                         
    
                                        um
                                         
                                        postpartum anxiety for me looks like all of the things that we were previously discussing just
                                         
                                        Uh, kind of like living in a state of fear and everything that you see you feel like
                                         
                                        Oh, like would that happen to my baby or like what if something bad goes wrong?
                                         
                                        and you think of
                                         
                                        All of the things that could go wrong because you're in full blown protection mode and I think for me
                                         
                                        It was to get off of facebook because I would see stuff popping up on facebook
                                         
                                        and then I would automatically like children's healthcare of Atlanta and like, uh
                                         
    
                                        Uh, the centers of disease control and like all of these things. I'm like, oh my god
                                         
                                        Like if what if my what if my kid gets like hand foot mouth or like what what if this happens and it was like unhealthy
                                         
                                        Anxiety to like a next level because I thought way more into those things than just like a passing thought
                                         
                                        I did not medicate myself for this. I learned coping mechanisms through therapy and I would highly
                                         
                                        Encourage that. Um, we talk about better help pretty often and so if you guys have not tried that
                                         
                                        You can use our code. I think it's gives a discount
                                         
                                        And definitely look into something like that because I think just really training your brain and going through the therapy process
                                         
                                        Is very helpful. Um, hip. Did you deal with this with any of your kids?
                                         
    
                                        so I actually
                                         
                                        and
                                         
                                        I don't know if anyone else saw this but
                                         
                                        When I initially read it, I thought it was postpartum aggression
                                         
                                        um, oh my god
                                         
                                        And I thought it was like the postpartum rage type deal and I did experience that a little bit
                                         
                                        um with my last one and
                                         
                                        It's it's strange to me that they don't really do
                                         
    
                                        Much more on anything post it's like, are you feeling okay postpartum? But like they're not really like
                                         
                                        Digging in a whole lot or like really putting emphasis on that. And so I think a lot of times even at the 6 8 week 10 week
                                         
                                        Whatever checkup it almost gets dusted off or forgotten about it's very um, like a nonchalant situation
                                         
                                        And I'm not saying that's the that's the way it is for all doctors, but the questions aren't probing enough
                                         
                                        I think they're like such generalized questions come like I think even moms sometimes miss the symptoms or
                                         
                                        Dads miss the symptoms. Um, or just partners not necessarily dads. I have um
                                         
                                        A friend of mine was talking to me about his
                                         
                                        They're not married his girlfriends
                                         
    
                                        experience with their two kids and
                                         
                                        How she didn't want to take care of the kids. She didn't really do anything
                                         
                                        He would come home from work and do everything and I just thought to myself
                                         
                                        Actually, I said it out loud to him. I said, you know, did she have postpartum and you guys completely just missed it
                                         
                                        And he was more angry
                                         
                                        Um, I don't think that it was given much thought
                                         
                                        Um, or really checked out, you know
                                         
                                        And so I felt bad for her because I was just like, you know, she can't you're expecting her to do all of this stuff
                                         
    
                                        And you guys don't realize that we just birthed humans out of our bodies
                                         
                                        And the amount of stress and hormones and everything that's happening in our bodies and the changed environment
                                         
                                        After you have a baby or babies is I mean, it's night and day difference to your life before
                                         
                                        I also think that
                                         
                                        over time
                                         
                                        Things like postpartum anxiety postpartum depression postpartum aggression
                                         
                                        um
                                         
                                        Those things are or should be normalized to talk about because it's mental health issues and dealing with
                                         
    
                                        Things that you truly just don't have control of like you wouldn't choose to
                                         
                                        Deal with these things and I think it's sometimes easier
                                         
                                        For people to turn a blind eye to something and not recognize it because when you recognize it
                                         
                                        You have to do something about it. And so
                                         
                                        You know, I couldn't I couldn't even imagine
                                         
                                        Um, having like postpartum depression. I'm glad mine was more anxious feelings and not the depression side of it
                                         
                                        Or me wanting to neglect my child mine was like hovering and I don't want anybody to touch him
                                         
                                        I'm afraid of him like getting germs like those types of things. So
                                         
    
                                        I couldn't even imagine
                                         
                                        Some people's stories that actually I've heard people, you know messaging me telling me just like
                                         
                                        Very very extreme and horrific things and I truly also could not imagine like the aggression aspect of it
                                         
                                        And how it would make you feel as a mom if you were experiencing that and then getting to the point of
                                         
                                        Realizing that you're experiencing that right like you like guilt
                                         
                                        You feel the aggression or the rage and then the guilt that you feel after because that's what that was me
                                         
                                        I mean, I never
                                         
                                        Thankfully I got it under control, but it was just like I couldn't handle
                                         
    
                                        It could be ADHD
                                         
                                        I don't know because it was just like a lot like the sounds and this and
                                         
                                        Just everything I could not handle it and then the lack of sleep on top of it was just like
                                         
                                        Why is nobody doing anything and talking about this and we're shamed as mothers?
                                         
                                        Oh, well don't have kids if this is what if you don't want to you know, take care of them
                                         
                                        Or if you're mad or if you're going to be hateful or resentful and it's like
                                         
                                        Uh, that's not what any mom goes into being a mom thinking like they're not going to think that
                                         
                                        I do have
                                         
    
                                        One last thing that I want to say on this. Um, I do
                                         
                                        Do want to have another child. I have established that like along the way
                                         
                                        Um
                                         
                                        But one thing that I think is like the coolest gift ever is when people pull money together to help someone get like a
                                         
                                        Night nurse because it is so expensive that but the lack of sleep like with a newborn
                                         
                                        Um, if I would have had a night nurse with Jackson, I feel like it would have been so worth the investment
                                         
                                        I just didn't have the money at that time. Um, to be able to do something like that
                                         
                                        And I think to be able to like have people pull together and do like a collective gift for something like that
                                         
    
                                        I would rather have that and everybody pull
                                         
                                        Together on that and get nothing else so that I could sleep literally literally
                                         
                                        I literally
                                         
                                        Um
                                         
                                        What did I forget somewhat one of my friends got prescribed tracidone. You know, I was like, um,
                                         
                                        All my kids are pretty much grown
                                         
                                        But can I can I have one of those just to sleep like obviously I didn't I didn't take one like don't don't crucify me on here
                                         
                                        but um, you know just to be able to sleep when you have a newborn is
                                         
    
                                        It would be a game changer game changer. Um, I that's another thing going back to the bloggers and celebrities and influencers like
                                         
                                        How are they putting themselves together or it seems like they're putting themselves together every single day
                                         
                                        And they have like toddlers and newborns like do they have help do they have night nurses like what it like do they
                                         
                                        I think that's something that also should be shared. It's like, okay
                                         
                                        If you're showing like all this and I'm guilty of this too
                                         
                                        like you're showing all of this if I'm showing like my house clean, but
                                         
                                        But my cleaner comes like every other Friday, but really has been coming every Friday. Um for the past like five weeks or so
                                         
                                        Um, I didn't do all of this myself and then also do everything else that I've been doing and like also put myself together
                                         
    
                                        So I think maybe telling more of like the whole story
                                         
                                        Would probably be a little bit helpful to be like, okay
                                         
                                        Well, you're actually not failing because I didn't put myself together like this
                                         
                                        I actually put myself together like this, but I also had help and I also had a housekeeper
                                         
                                        Well, and I think that would be
                                         
                                        I mean, I think people would be like, well damn, I wish I could afford that but
                                         
                                        I think we would appreciate
                                         
                                        The work that goes into being an influencer a little more like people who don't understand it
                                         
    
                                        They would understand. Okay. I had to get a babysitter to film this video and be able to do my makeup and hair
                                         
                                        And put this outfit together in order to film this content or you know
                                         
                                        My child did have a meltdown on the way to school when I dropped her him or her off
                                         
                                        Before I had to film all this content. And so I'm dealing with some mom guilt today or whatever just like
                                         
                                        Even just talking about some of the realness. I think it would help people don't understand
                                         
                                        Influencing and creator content. It would just help a lot
                                         
                                        It's also with like the trends too though, right because social media has changed over time
                                         
                                        So I think that being able to read a room and being like, okay, everything's not perfect
                                         
    
                                        Like we all know that I love like a cute curated feed and like I have always been a photo girl like
                                         
                                        I had polaroid cameras growing up
                                         
                                        I always had like the top notch digital camera when those came out and like before that
                                         
                                        I strolled around with like those old school like rolly
                                         
                                        Ones that like you go and get developed like I rolled around with those like disposables
                                         
                                        Yeah, disposables like I have always been like a picture person
                                         
                                        So I don't really want to apologize for having like a pretty feed on instagram
                                         
                                        But at the same time like that's not what life looks like every single day
                                         
    
                                        And I feel like I don't come on the podcast and make it seem like that's what my life looks like every single day
                                         
                                        It's just like I like pretty photos
                                         
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                                        Like something that i want to talk about that came from the kitty gang that's like real real life
                                         
                                        Um, and then this is the last thing that we're going to talk about and then we're going to do foul play
                                         
                                        Um, it says lindsay. This is for you from the kitty gang. I saw this candle and it reminded me of
                                         
                                        The story that lindsay told about her and suburban dad
                                         
    
                                        And on the front of the candle it says when this candle is lit lick my clit
                                         
                                        What
                                         
                                        Yeah, and i'm like, okay
                                         
                                        I actually need that candle and i sent the screenshot of that
                                         
                                        To suburban dad and he was like, oh, so that's always going to be lit, right?
                                         
                                        I'm I can't right now because
                                         
                                        Did you ever just like not be in the mood for that or no? No, I mean, I'm always in the mood. Okay, because
                                         
                                        Liji asked me the other day. He's like because we were talking about dinner or something
                                         
    
                                        He's like I could eat you and I was like, I'm not worried about that right now
                                         
                                        I'm not thinking about that right now like no
                                         
                                        I wonder if that changes like I wonder if that changes over time. I just don't know like
                                         
                                        I I think that I am just truly like so in love that
                                         
                                        Like anytime is really fine. And then someone did ask me
                                         
                                        Anytime is really fine
                                         
                                        someone asked me if
                                         
                                        Suburban dad realized that my hair was on fire and like I do want to like talk about that
                                         
    
                                        Just like really like 30 seconds briefly. No, he didn't fucking realize that my hair was on fire
                                         
                                        And so I really said like I smelled it and I was like
                                         
                                        Like like some things. I think something's burning like it's crisp
                                         
                                        Like you could like smell like crispiness and I was like, fuck is that like are we cooking chicken nuggets?
                                         
                                        Like what's going on? No, just like my hair was on fire. So I patted it out and I was just like keep going
                                         
                                        I patted it out. Okay. And then we talked about it like after the fact but like
                                         
                                        I hope you don't laugh about it. Like I hope someone draws a piece of art with your hair on fire
                                         
                                        Love that. Love that. Okay. Okay foul play
                                         
    
                                        Okay, number one foul play follow-up got cheated on and had crazy revenge ideas
                                         
                                        P carpet lady checking in. Thanks for sharing my story. I feel
                                         
                                        Vindicated by Kale's response. Okay. Vindicated. I don't know Kristen. Tell us what vindicated is
                                         
                                        Like attacked or does she feel no?
                                         
                                        She feels like justified and like rightful for her actions. Okay. Um,
                                         
                                        definitely
                                         
                                        I need to go back to college. Okay. So follow up with your questions. I go to the ob gyn every year every single year
                                         
                                        I went to my annual checkup and found out that not only do I now have hpb
                                         
    
                                        But that it was a very aggressive strain that I had acquired in that last year
                                         
                                        But it also progressed to stage two and then she puts in parentheses
                                         
                                        The x was my only partner during this time and we were together for three years
                                         
                                        Because of the strand of hpb and how aggressive it was progressing. They recommended removing my cervix and uterus asap
                                         
                                        I confronted the x about it and he fessed up that he had been cheating. Oh
                                         
                                        Fuck no, I did come up with all of this. I did come up with this all on my own
                                         
                                        I'm a normal nice person. I swear
                                         
                                        I just lost my damn mind for a minute when I found everything out and had a whole day to reflect on it by myself
                                         
    
                                        While I was packing and trying to figure out where to go now that I was broke
                                         
                                        The ideas were just a way of self soothing. But once he started bringing home chicks gloves were off and I just did it
                                         
                                        He's fine these days found a look alike to knock up four months later and found a better paying job
                                         
                                        He's now got two kids me single by choice
                                         
                                        How do I find these assholes and let them treat me like this and spend the pandemic doing a lot of therapy to work on
                                         
                                        Myself from better help. I use your code. Thanks for that by the way
                                         
                                        I'm in such a better place mentally after all of this and while my actions were definitely
                                         
                                        Like that of a crazy person. I'm living my best life
                                         
    
                                        She said I'm living my best sane life these days. Love you ladies and I look forward to your podcast every week
                                         
                                        Okay, I would if I had if they recommended to me that my cervix and uterus had to be taken out asap because of some cheating
                                         
                                        Fucking degenerate that comes into my house and I'm you know, loved for the past three years
                                         
                                        I think everything that she did was justified your dicks literally being soldered off with a fucking butter knife
                                         
                                        Like no questions asked immediately like Lorena Bobbitt right now
                                         
                                        Thank you so much for following up with us and giving us all
                                         
                                        the details and I am also so glad that you were able to get in therapy and
                                         
                                        Help yourself because I think oftentimes when you go through experiences like this
                                         
    
                                        it does take therapy to be able to get better and to like retrain your mind to
                                         
                                        think in a different way and to be able to heal and
                                         
                                        And sometimes the healing process
                                         
                                        Takes being able to do therapy and be able to talk it out
                                         
                                        And also sometimes karma does have to be taken into your own hands. So well, and then there's that okay
                                         
                                        The last one that we're gonna do it says hey, kala lindsay
                                         
                                        I'm a huge fan of coffee combos and love you both
                                         
                                        I decided to submit a foul play so here it goes a few weeks ago
                                         
    
                                        My husband and I of five years were having sex. We have two kids one and four
                                         
                                        We had put the kids to bed early and it was 11 p.m. So we we were sure that they were asleep as we were having sex
                                         
                                        I hear someone running back down the hallway laughing but nothing else that morning
                                         
                                        I asked my son how he slept and he said good last night. I saw daddy
                                         
                                        He's making the humping motion on top of mommy last night. I was mortified anyways
                                         
                                        I hope my foul play makes the podcast love you guys. Oh, um
                                         
                                        literal like
                                         
                                        The worst case scenario honestly, like I don't know if I would rather
                                         
    
                                        I would rather like walk in on my parents than have my kid walk in on me
                                         
                                        Rather walking on my parents than have my kid walk like I would rather be traumatized by
                                         
                                        My parents and like that experience. Yeah having sex and have had that experience
                                         
                                        Than my kid walking in on me having sex like no, like that is literally no like not fucking both
                                         
                                        No, which one were you more traumatized by my kids with me. Yeah, that's what I'm saying like yeah, yeah
                                         
                                        Yeah, no, no and but I mean luckily her kids are one and four
                                         
                                        Hopefully they for I mean she's not the parents are never gonna forget about this
                                         
                                        But one and four. Hopefully they forget about it
                                         
    
                                        Um, I have no
                                         
                                        Did you imagine just like your kid like air humping like showing you what they saw?
                                         
                                        No, that I that I would be more mortified by like
                                         
                                        I have no fucking words like or like if you were that situation where your kid walks in and like
                                         
                                        Point blank asks you like what are you doing?
                                         
                                        Like what are you saying? We're doing jujitsu
                                         
                                        Like no like oh my god. No, I'm traumatized like everybody needs to be in bed
                                         
                                        You need to check and make sure everyone's sleeping and like also drooling just in case
                                         
    
                                        And like also pray before you start doing this no one's gonna have a nightmare or throw up or need to take a shit
                                         
                                        That is coffee combos podcast
                                         
                                        That is
                                         
                                        Also, you have some things coming up that you want to talk about
                                         
                                        Well, yes, I do actually. Um, I was gonna ask you what you were doing for the rest of your week
                                         
                                        Um, one thing that we are managing chaos. Well, we already know that that's like very generic and like always all the time
                                         
                                        Um, but one thing that I did want to say is our next month's true crime. We're covering sins of our mother
                                         
                                        Um, so make sure you guys watch it. It's a three parter
                                         
    
                                        And lots of intricacies in that story and I have a ton to say about it
                                         
                                        So make sure you guys tune in to that true crime
                                         
                                        Episode I always love covering stories for some reason that involves
                                         
                                        Killing and religion. I don't know why like I don't know if that makes me a serial killer or like what but love that
                                         
                                        um
                                         
                                        outside of that at the end of this week, I'm going to be heading to Nashville to
                                         
                                        work on a little solo project for coffee combos podcast
                                         
                                        um
                                         
    
                                        and
                                         
                                        Kale's not going to be on that episode which I'm kind of like feeling weird about
                                         
                                        Uh, because we always just probably all right. I'm going to have a great time with my week off. So I mean don't act more excited about it
                                         
                                        I'll probably be taking a nap
                                         
                                        I'm glad I can hold down the fort. Um, it's something that I'm not going to tell you guys what it is
                                         
                                        I love when I'm able to tease something because you guys hate it and I love it
                                         
                                        but
                                         
                                        It's something that has been asked for for a very very long time
                                         
    
                                        And I'm excited to finally be able to do it and feel like I am in the emotional and mental place to be able to take on the project
                                         
                                        So make sure you guys stay tuned to
                                         
                                        Our social media for when that episode is going to be released
                                         
                                        Um, and if you have not followed us on at coffee combos podcast, make sure you follow us over there
                                         
                                        If you've not subscribed to the show, you can find us on any podcast app and always podcast one first
                                         
                                        We hope you guys have a great week and we'll talk to you soon. See ya
                                         
                                        Hi guys, I'm Teresa judeis and you know me from the red house was in new jersey
                                         
                                        And now you'll know me from my new podcast namaste bitches
                                         
    
                                        With my co-host melissa feaster. What's up? You guys? I'm melissa feaster and Teresa and I are talking about
                                         
                                        everything love life relationships. Yes sex
                                         
                                        Food and family we are getting into it all
                                         
                                        It's a real look at my life when the cameras aren't rolling
                                         
                                        But don't worry. We'll be talking about all that tv stuff too
                                         
                                        So follow rate and review namaste bitches now at apple podcast spotify or ever you get your podcast
                                         
