Coffee Convos with Kail Lowry and Lindsie Chrisley - Ex-Wives & Butt Plugs Gone Wrong
Episode Date: June 15, 2023Seems like after last week's hemorrhoid talk Kail was unfortunately, and magically, able to manifest them for herself immediately afterwards. She shares the craziness that followed, her recent health... complication, and Lindsie asks Kail about her depression. The Facebook group brings up ex-wives which Kail and Lindsie are, but also have dealt with others.. they share their thoughts. Also, what's up with narcissists? Kail talks about her experience with them. For Foul Play, we learn Kail's butt cheeks go deep, and to read up on proper butt plug removal. Check out our Instagram @coffeeconvospodcast for more! Thank you to our sponsors!Better Help: This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/coffee today to get 10% off your first monthLiquid IV: Get 20% off when you go to liquid-iv.com and use code COFFEECONVOS at checkoutProgressive: Visit progressive.com to learn moreQuince: Discover the affordable luxury you deserve, go to Quince.com/coffee to get free shipping and 365-day returns on your next orderStitch Fix: Try StitchFix.com/coffeeconvos today and you'll get 25% off when you keep everything in your Fix
Transcript
Discussion (0)
I hate gift giving and receiving.
Receiving gifts is so weird.
What do you say thank you?
This is Coffee Convose with Kale Lowry and Lindsay Crisley.
I really want you to be in your fuel scale.
That does not interest me whatsoever.
I feel very attacked by you.
A spirited discussion about motherhood, friendship, family, and life in the public eye.
I'm just not with a faker anymore.
There's a fakery bakery around here.
Here's Kale and Lindsay.
Hello Lindsay. anymore. There's a fakery bakery around here. Here's Halen Lindy. Hello Lindy. Good morning, everyone and welcome to Coffee Hondo's podcast. Good morning, Halen Lowry. Good morning. I was
supposed to have two other recordings this morning and they got canceled and so my day kind of was thrown a curveball and so I decided to go to
PetSmart this morning bright and early get some stuff for Lux's fish tank and I
rescued a beta from there because they are in these little bowls and I know it's
not good to get fish from there but like also what's the alternative you know what do you mean it's not good to get fish from there,
but also what's the alternative?
You know what I mean?
What do you mean?
It's not good to get fish from there.
Well, they're just not pita friendly.
They have these little betas in these cups
that are literally the size of a coffee cup.
That's animal abuse.
Can I tell you about the animal abuse story
that happened right whenever I got Georgia?
Yeah.
So it was the same day that I got
locked out of my house. Do you remember me telling you that? And... Bigly yes.
Like got her, Caroline took me to Petsmart because I unexpectedly got Georgia. I was going to get
a dog from another breeder and then went like fell in love with her. So brought her home and had
absolutely nothing. So I go to Petsmart and I'm like strolling down the aisles and for whatever
reason, like I feel like PetSmart used to be so much better before Amazon. And now I feel like
their stock on everything is super limited and all the things that I wanted was actually on Amazon
and not at PetSmart. So just FYI, if you're getting a dog or want dog stuff, always check Amazon first.
So I'm strolling through PetSmart, have the dog.
So you know, everybody is stop and ask them to thicken pet,
whatever. And there's these teenage kids and they're with all the beta fish.
And I don't even know if I want to hear this fucking story.
If you tell me that they're shaking the beta fish, I will.
No, no, it's worse.
So they were talking about how they were trying to like pick which ones they wanted and I was watching this because back in college people used to buy them.
Not me, but like I knew people who did this used to buy them and would fight them. Why? I don't know. Like I guess because they are I don't think two betas can be in the same tank, right?
No, they can't.
So that was always like, I knew that from college
and I was like, something about these boys looks sus.
So I'm gonna stand by this thing
and listen to their conversation.
That was being a nosy-nelly.
And they were trying to both pick the biggest bait at each
and when I got up to the counter, I told the girl, I was like, I'm pretty sure those boys and they were trying to both pick the biggest bait at each.
And when I got up to the counter, I told the girl I was like,
I'm pretty sure those boys are trying to buy those fish
to fight them.
And the checkout girl went ballistic
and she was like, I'm gonna call the police.
Like if you are buying these animals to fight them,
that is animal abuse and absolutely not. She didn't let them buy them. They had to leave the store. Good, that is animal abuse, and absolutely not.
She didn't let them buy them, they had to leave the store.
Good, that's so good.
I didn't, honestly, that's so freaking sad
that you, that if my kids even thought it would be
a cute idea to fight fish, I would be like,
what the fuck is wrong with you?
I mean, obviously the parents probably didn't know
because they were in college, but I was not,
I mean, their fish selection at PetSmart
was not great.
And honestly, all the betas looked kind of sick.
Like they all just kind of looked, I don't know.
But I picked the best one, the best looking one.
I actually feel bad.
And I know it's like falling into like the whole,
like if we keep buying them,
then they feel that there's a demand for them.
But there's no way there's a demand
like that at PetSmart for beta fish. I don't know. And also to your point about checking
the Amazon, also check your local pet stores because there's a pet store by us. It's on my
way home like from between the kids school and my house. And it's called PetSmart on 300.
It's like a family owned and operated little pet store. And that's where
you actually get to our dog food and stuff, like any like bones and stuff like, he'll get,
I think it's like a county or something, he'll get like actual stuff from there. It
is a little bit pricier, but you're also supporting a small business. So I was actually
going to say that that I think that some of the deterrent of shopping at like these small pet stores is the price.
Is the price point?
Because I went to get like Georgia treats one time
and they do have a better selection
and like cleaner versions of everything I feel like,
but it was like twice the price of what you're on Amazon.
If you live in like an area like Lindsay, I'm sure you have a ton of options nearby for us.
Pets on 300 is the closest pet store to us versus going the opposite way, 25, 30 minutes
to a pet smart.
You know what I mean?
So like the one that's a little bit more pricey is more convenient, but to your point,
yeah, especially in this economy, it's hard to, you know, make sense of the cost, but I need to tell you something.
What?
So, number one, I slept in this weekend, but it really was like a reverse sleep cycle
because I didn't go to bed until so late because I thought it was gonna be a really low-key evening.
And I had finished up work yesterday
and went and grabbed a drink with one of my girlfriends.
Her husband had gotten in a bad car accident.
So I was like, I'm gonna go and grab a drink with her
and find out what's going on.
And then I went and played guest who was Jackson
and played with Georgia and grocery store,
you know, like all the things came home and I was like,
yes, I can run some laundry, be out on my porch,
so I open up my back door and I have a little thing
that we'll keep it propped open
and then I can have my fire going
and all the things, fire and music.
So I'm just sitting out on my couches outside and all of a sudden I look like on the skirt
of my house, like on the brick.
I see something like moving kind of like, trickling along the way.
It was a snake, wasn't it?
No.
And I'm like, what the fuck is that?
And I'm on the phone with someone.
And I said, stop talking.
There is something. It's a rat. It's a mouse. It's a chipmunk. Like, I don't know what this is.
Okay, it went all on the skirt, like, on the whole back of my house. And I was like,
fuck, like, two things were going to happen. It's either going to go in my house, or it's going
to come this way. And either way, I'm gonna pass away.
So the fucker goes behind my phone and helps himself
into my house.
No, nope, nope.
He is in here somewhere.
I have no idea where he's at.
I saw him hanging out near my couch.
Like once he came in, like I tried to come in, I saw him hanging out near my couch. Like once once he came in, like I tried to come in,
I saw him hanging out by my couch, and I was like, if this little fucker thinks that he's gonna chill
in this house, and he is gonna take up residency, like that's absolutely not gonna happen. So like,
how do you get how do you get rid of them? So what was it? Was it a mouse? I'm on the phone with an unsaid named person
and he's like, do you have a box, Lindsay?
And I'm like, a box for what?
Like, what the fuck am I going to use a box for?
And he's like, what about a broom?
And I'm like, okay, so then I'm like, okay,
I don't think I'm going to be able to sleep tonight.
Like, this fucker is going to end up in my bed
and I'm gonna wake up and miss you those beaty little eyes
and like I need a life alert.
So I haul will and I'm like will and he goes,
this better be real fucking good
because you just woke me up from a deep sleep.
What time was it?
11.
Oh, I said, sir, I'm gonna need you to immediately tell
me what the fuck to do because there is either a rat, a mouse, or chipmunk inside the house. He said,
well, go and get a broom and usher it out. And I was like, do you two fenders think that he's just
hanging out like, you know, like a house pet like, oh come here,
like let me like broom you out of the house.
No, he's fucking running all over here, probably eating holes in all of my shit.
I think it happens that fast, Lindsey.
How do you humanely get rid of them?
This is maybe naive of me and I've never had to do it, but my instant thought when you said it was chilling by your couch was to like
So dumb sometimes
But like cheese like in a trail form out the door
You know what I mean like leave the door open and put cheese going outside
Like far outside so then it gets the idea to go outside and not come inside. You know what I mean?
Okay, but the risk there is my dad always told me growing up when it comes to rats and
snakes where there's a small one, there's bigger ones.
So I'm terrified to leave the door open because what if it's families out there?
Right, right, right, right, right, right.
Okay.
So now I don't know what to do.
If you would have saw the level of psychosis that was going on in this house last night,
that in itself would have been a scene on a reality show.
I was taking my broom, no lie, like,
and by the way, also my broom is completely broken
because I left it and it smashed, like either underneath my tire wheel
when I was like pulling the garage or the garage door,
like smashed it all up.
So if you saw what my broom looked like,
I know I can afford another broom and I need to go and do it,
but you know, trying to be economical here
and use what I have.
Go under all my couches and I'm like,
I'm laying down on my stomach and I'm like, oh, this fucker's gonna run out, like it's gonna run out and I've got my broom and I'm like, oh, this fucker's gonna run out. Like, it's gonna run out, and I've got my broom and I'm like, going all over the place.
I did this for an hour.
Did you get it out?
No.
He's nowhere to be found.
So, I was like, okay, I'm gonna get in my bed
and I'm gonna calm down and he's probably sleeping now.
So, every five minutes, I would wake up
and, you know, like, the flashlight on your phone.
Yeah.
I'd turn my back on and I'd be like, I'm gonna go back on my phone. down and he's probably sleeping now. So every five minutes I would wake up
and you know, like the flashlight on your phone.
Yeah.
I'd turn my flashlight on my phone
and like put it in all the corners of my room
to like see if I saw it dies.
And that's what made me sleep in,
which leads me to the next thing
that I'm about to ask you.
Can you tell me something that you feel
like people don't splurge on but should?
Things that people, like something that's like an underrated, like something that you would
maybe splurge on, but like the majority of people wouldn't, because there's one thing
that will actually there's two things that I will like major splurge.
I can't think you caught me so off guard with that question that I can't think of anything
off the top of my head, but maybe once you say something, I'll be able to say something.
I'm wondering if the one that I'm about to say would be exactly the ones that you would
also say, um, linens.
Oh, 100%.
I'm talking bedsheets, towels. Oh, yeah, and also skincare,
because skincare is so important.
I woke up this morning after I'd slept in,
praying to God that when I opened my eyes,
I didn't see two things.
I didn't see its eyeballs looking at me
and I didn't see a trail of turds.
I felt so good in my sheets.
And I was like,
you know you have arrived in life reala turds. I felt so good in my sheets. And I was like,
that you know you have arrived in life when the one luxury that you
thrive off of is your bed sheets.
I love sleeping in good quality bed sheets.
Me too. Like there's truly nothing better. And I feel like we spend,
I mean, maybe we spend more time in our sheets than most. And that's probably
going to get twisted in some
way.
Oh, no depression.
Depression.
Depression.
Kale is in my sheets more than
anyone on the planet.
Like depression.
Kale doesn't leave the bed.
I don't know what not leaving
the bed would feel like at
this point.
I mean, probably on
some days it's probably
glorious, but in the state of the world, doesn't leave the bed. I don't know what not leaving the bed would feel like at this point.
I mean, probably on some days, it's probably glorious,
but in the state of depression, it's like a necessity.
Yeah, it's not great.
Because you almost go stir crazy even in the depression.
I have the Down Comforter by Quince,
and I absolutely love it, it's white.
And I know it's a little sketch to
have white when you have kids and pets but it just fits the vibe in our room so I'm obsessed. I also
have the Grey Waffle slippers which I'm obsessed with and Lux wears them around the house all the time.
I actually think he has them on as we speak so we're going to need kid sizes but Quint's offers a
range of must-have items. They have a 100% Mongolian cashmere sweater for only $50,
which would make a great gift.
But let me just tell you,
Father's Day is coming up birthdays all summer.
Maybe a bridal shower, baby shower,
something for mom.
This is the perfect place to get something.
I'm adding in something for yourself
because you and Lindsey keep telling me about Quince.
So I went on, I'm awaiting my delivery of my slippers.
Oh, perfect. we both have them.
Yeah, and you guys haven't stopped talking about them,
so I, of course, was influenced
and now need them myself.
So, thanks, Cipone, get yourself a little gift.
You deserve it.
Yes, and Quinn's only works with factories
that you save ethical and responsible
manufacturing practices and premium eco-friendly fabrics
and finishes, which is really nice.
So you don't have to feel bad about getting
like high quality items,
because they're without that crazy markup.
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Right now, go to quints.com slash coffee
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That's quintsqunc.com slash coffee
for free shipping 365 day returns.
Quince dot com slash coffee.
But wait, before you go any further, was it last week that we talked about
hemorrhoids? Yeah.
I shit you not.
When we got off that podcast, you know, and like this is, I read our,
I read our Apple reviews and I know some people don't like the foul play stuff
but this is just a reminder to everyone on here.
Hemeroids do not discriminate.
You can absolutely get a hemorrhoid no matter who you are.
And I went to the bathroom and there was blood dripping out
of my butt.
And I was like, I don't know if this is coming
from my vagina or my butt, so I wipe again. And I didn't feel pain or anything and I wasn't constipated,
so I don't know what was going on, but I blame you and the entire coffee combo's kitty gang,
because there's no reason why I had to experience that firsthand.
I don't think, you know, anybody's butthole should have to experience that firsthand? I don't think you know anybody's
but-hole should have to experience that honestly and I just want to read the
text message that I received to our group chat for me. And immediately I was
like she's either pissed off or she is actively hemorrhoiding. No I was
actively hemorrhoiding. Don't ever fucking talk about hemroids on this podcast again.
You sick fox.
My asshole is bleeding.
And I was dead serious because that was an experience
that I was not prepared for.
Would you also like to tell everyone
what you didn't share when we originally started talking
about hemroids about how your asshole was bleeding a couple of weeks ago.
Yes, so the weekend in New York, I got really, really nervous, like anxiety, stomach issues,
and I went to the bathroom.
I'm trying to not speak in such a disgusting way because I people don't like it so I want to just
tread lightly. I had anxiety, stomach troubles and I immediately went to the bathroom and
I'm like screaming for Kristen and I'm like I don't know where this is where this blood
is coming from like I don't know what's going on and she's like well shove some toilet paper
up there and see. It was bleeding and I just didn't think anything of it because I thought, okay, what, I actually
hadn't gone to the bathroom in a long time.
So like, maybe that's what it's from.
But, you know, I made it 31 years without having a hemorrhoid situation.
And so it was just very ironic that we talked about it on the podcast and they had hemorrhoids. Well, sorry, I was choking on,
I was trying to choke down some three things.
Actually, it was collagen.
I felt like I needed to drink the whole bottle.
And then I felt like I needed to take trim
while we're sitting here to trim up.
And then drinking a diet lemonade.
And for any person that tried to come for me
about the diet lemonade and saying that it's foul from Chick-fil-A what you are as foul.
Wait, someone, I saw someone, I don't know if it was our group chat or the, or the group Facebook, but somebody did say it was good.
No, there was a lot of people that are, are actual podcast listeners who probably are religious listeners that agreed and said that it's so good.
But then why the day, though, why not regular?
There's just something about the taste. Like, it just tastes different. And I don't even know
like what made me start doing diet. I have no idea, but it's just like so much better.
But somebody sent me some scathing message on my DMs, on Instagram.
Called me a stupid whore and said that I was ignorant
and had toy eliminated from Chick-fil-A was not good.
I mean, I was like, well, I'm glad that makes me a whore and ignorant.
I just, you know, but those are my favorite types of comments.
I love it. No, like they really do give me a Chuckle when you go so hard about how much you hate me. And then it's like I think it's gonna be something
Fucking wild that I did and I admitted to or something like that
But it ends up being like like I got one the other day about the fence not being up around my pool like you're such an unfit mother
not being up around my pool. Like, you're such an unfit mother, da da da da da, put the fucking, put a fucking fence around your pool. And it's like, things take time. Like, I, and things cost
money. And certain things have to be done to, you know, I had to have a lesh, I had to spread
dirt around the concrete patio and order and level it out in order for the fence to go up.
But she was like, you're an unfit mother blah blah blah blah.
That's so unsafe. And it's just like, oh, like I thought you were going to say that like,
you know, my kids aren't cared for or something. You know what I mean? Like the most
wild shit, it's insane. It's the investment of the hatred for me. Yeah, no it is. Also, I need to
tell you something. So it's not really like important, but I do want to know if you or anyone else on this podcast
has experienced this because this is the first time I ever experienced it.
So just like the hemorrhoid situation.
Yesterday, so remember how, I think it was last week you said that you got labs done for
your amulet.
So I felt some type of way and I was like, I feel like I should ask for labs.
So I did and it's like, my friend gets labs done.
So he gave me this whole fucking stack of paperwork, right?
So I'm like, all right, but I go to lab core and I have to fast for 12 hours
because they're doing a CBC or is a CBC or the A1C,
something that you have to fast for, right?
So I'm like, okay, I thought it was at 9.15.
So I dropped the kids off at school.
I'm waiting in the parking lot and I'm thinking
it's at 9.15 or 9.45, whatever.
Kristen's like no kale, it's at 10.50.
So I'm starving.
Like so hungry, I have stomach pains.
When I get out of that appointment,
the first thing I do is eat, but then I don't know why
because I haven't binge eaten in a long time. I like binged ate all yesterday, right? Like I had a
sandwich and I had pizza and I had spaghetti for dinner and all carbs. It was
insane. But throughout the entire day, it felt like I was so hungry. Like I had
stomach pains from being hungry, but I also simultaneously, again, TMI,
but I also hadn't gone to the bathroom in a few days.
Has that ever happened to you?
Because normally I feel like you can't eat
when you're, when you're stopped up like that.
I feel like you can't eat, but like it was like,
I was a human garbage disposal.
I have had lots of those days and it's so strange.
And I wonder like what internally is going on with your body
when it happens.
And I always wonder that whenever this happens to me
where it's almost like you eat all the regular things
that you would eat on any other given day.
And for whatever reason, you just can't get to the point
of full.
It was so weird.
So you just keep eating and keep eating and keep eating. And then by the end of the day, you're like, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, oh, my, oh, my, oh, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, oh, stuffed with food and carbs that I was still, it was the weirdest experience. I wanted to see if you ever experienced it or anyone else.
So interestingly enough, you have.
So yeah, I interestingly enough had.
You want me to tell you what I did also
before we started recording.
Mm-hmm.
I derma plane my face again,
which a lot of people from this podcast
are asking me to do a demonstration.
So I feel like then I'll do a demonstration
the next time we do a live chat.
Okay.
Cause I don't know if you do it the same way that I do it.
I don't do it.
I only derma plane my mustache, my PCOS mustache.
Wait what?
What?
Did I not tell you this?
Okay.
No. What?
So I started getting like in the corners of my lip. I started getting like darker peach buzz
and I read that that's like very much a PCOS thing. Tell me why a couple weeks ago when I woke up in the morning next to Elijah
He was like, you're you have a mustache
And he's like, you mean do you shave that or do you like what do you do?
have a mustache. And he's like, do you shave that or do you, like, what do you do? I was like, stop talking to me about my mustache. Like, you don't need to address it. I will handle it.
Yeah, I started getting like a darker and it's for, I know it's from PCOS. It's from like
high testosterone, probably borderline diabetes. I don't know. But I also... Why does everybody in
your life literally harass you? Like, Like, if I don't already know.
Yeah.
And wait, so then hold on, now I'm on a tangent.
Hold on.
So then I go to the sleep study, I do the sleep consult
last week, which I had said in our group chat.
And I told the girl was like, so do you have suffer
from any of these things?
I did an omelette guest depression.
I take Lexa Pro.
And she's like, okay, that doesn't surprise me
with the way that you're sleeping. She's like, you'll never, okay, that doesn't surprise me with the way that you're sleeping.
She's like, you'll never be able to get out of your depression with the way that you're
sleeping, but also I said I can't lose weight because I'm not sleeping and I'm depressed.
And she was like, oh yeah, she's like 100% it's linked.
She gave me like the whole rundown on how sleep depression and obesity are all linked
together.
And all of those are symptoms of PCOS, and I'm just like, basically what you're saying is,
I need to go into hibernation,
I need to wrap myself in a cocoon,
and come out of the depression,
and then I will sleep,
and then have enough energy to go to the gym,
so I can then lose weight,
so then I can do all these,
it was just like a,
like this whole week has been a shit show, Enzy.
Anyway, continue, go ahead with your story.
Well, I don't know what it was.
It was the German, German plane.
So, but then I got to get back to what you were just saying.
So, I was German planning my face and I just remembered
like people keep asking me.
So, I'm going to do it on that because I don't really like
feel like doing it on Instagram for that many people to see.
But was doing that and then started putting on my vitamin C
and my face serum and trying to rub everything down my neck
and all over my titties and stuff.
And I realized that I was using an absorbent amount
of an absorbent amount of product.
And I remember my skincare provider being like,
you know, don't need that much when you're using
good skincare, like it's pretty concentrated.
And so, you know, just a little goes a long way.
And I need to know how many other people feel like
the more you use, the better you feel
or you feel like you're getting a better result,
but you're like probably not. I think it's all in my brain.
I actually don't like the way it looks when I have a lot of product on, like in terms of makeup.
I just don't like that kinky look. I have to do it for like camera purposes, as you know, it just
doesn't translate outside of, it doesn't translate across the camera lens if it's not super
heavy, but on a day to day basis, I want to use as little product as possible.
Oh, yeah, but I'm talking about skin care stuff, specifically.
Oh, skin care.
Okay.
Oils, for your body, like honey, I will be lathered up like a piece of glaze chicken. Yes, ma'am. I will also like that. I will also like honey. I will be lathered up like. Like a piece of glaze chicken.
Yes ma'am.
Yeah, I will love that.
I also love that.
Yes, the skincare, I know I don't need as much as I have,
but I do like a nice thick layer
of whatever skincare serum I'm using
or moisturizer or whatever, you know,
I really love a nice, like I was going to say to you
when you came on this recording that your skin looks glowy.
Yeah, because it's probably the amount of everything that is like just like resting on my
skin.
And I'm hoping throughout this recording that it just like soaks in, soaks in, soaks
in, it makes me younger by the minute.
Well, I hope so too.
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it's a bunch of clothes. We go through it. He picks what he wants.
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They have a prepaid return label,
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You know I'm all about convenience.
I know that you've always told me
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Outside of that, I need to go back to the depression stuff because I've wanted to ask you this
for a long time. Do you feel like,
and your depressive states, because I feel that you definitely have ups and downs,
like some days, you're way better than you are on other days,
and it can be like one day apart.
But do you get bothered by people who you surround yourself with?
And this is probably a question that I'm really
asking everybody who's listening, people who struggle with depression, does it bother
you that other people are able to have the ability to like complete task? And you know,
are you comparing yourself to somebody else that you feel like might be being more productive than what you are capable of being?
Yes
It bothers you it bothers me and I get really really hard and down on myself about it
And then I also have an extreme level of guilt when I'm in a in a low like when I'm having a depressive low
And I need to go to my room to sleep or if Natalie's helping me with the kids
and like I said this morning, two of my recordings
got canceled back to back recordings were canceled.
I wanted to crawl into my bed and go to sleep
and just knowing just the feeling of even though
I had someone to help me with childcare
and I could put anything else that needed to be done
aside instead of going to pick up groceries,
I could have instacarded them.
The extreme level of guilt that I feel
when I'm in a depressive low is horrible.
It's, and it's, I apologize to Elijah and my kids
and Natalie all the time.
If I'm in a depressive low, I'm like, I'm so sorry.
I cannot, I told my kids that this morning
when I was dropping them off at school, I saw girl walking like she was exercising and I was telling them, you know,
I should be doing that.
Lincoln's like, oh, can I walk with you?
And it's like, I want to say yes so bad.
And I want to be able to be like, yeah, I'm going to get up and we're going to go for
a walk.
And I told them, you know, it's, it's, it's so hard.
It's like this cycle of depression and lack of sleep and you know PCOS or weight loss or whatever it is
It's like this like nasty toxic cycle and I can't describe it
But I do I compare myself to others and it's like why do these other people
Get up and they look like they're put together, you know, their hair is done. Their makeup is on
They're in jeans, which I don't know why I associate,
because maybe because I've lived in leggings
for the past five years, I don't know.
They just look put together, it seems like they're,
they're put together for the most part,
you know, they probably don't have perfect days,
but why can't I do something as simple as that?
Well, I think that I don't know,
but probably people who do struggle with depression and get
in these depressive states, everything that you just said makes sense to me.
And I feel like at that point, you have to get off of social media and you have to remember
that what people are posting are typically a highlight reel.
Like you have some people that are on there posting very real and raw stuff and it's not like
pretty all the time but for the most part most people are posting their
highlight reel and if you're just laid up in the bed feeling like you don't
even have the energy to take a shower and you're saying you know oh wow
this person like really has it together and they're doing all of these things
it would be very hard not to fall into that comparison trap. I told, I told Kristen the other day, I was like, I have a confession to make.
The last several times that I was showering, I was showering my bathtub.
Wait, what?
And what I mean by that was I wasn't stopping the drain and letting the water fill up.
I was sitting in my bathtub and I have like the handheld piece.
So I have like the faucet part and then I also have like a handheld
sprayer
So I wasn't I'm very weird about my baths like when I get in the bathtub
And I think I've told this one is part of
I don't like to sit in my own filth so I will feel about
Wash myself drain it and then rinse myself off
Then stop it and then it's clean water in there. Does that make sense?
Yes, so I actually, and I wonder how many people do like the different variations of what I'm about to say and then what you just said because I
You know that I don't take baths anymore like
I said that like in my marriage and you know, I feel like that became my escape. And it all makes sense to me
now, but I have not taken a bath since then. But when I did every single night, I would get in the
bathtub and let the water run and like let it drain. And I would wash my body or like if I was
going to shave my legs, I would go ahead and like shave my legs, rinse out the bathtub,
plug the water, then do my bubble bath or you know, like whatever else I'm putting in there, ebbsum salt,
like whatever, and sit and clean water while I am clean.
Yes, yeah, and that's what I told her.
I said I have a confession, like I have it very occasionally, I'll get in my stand-up
shower and do a stand-up shower, but I'm essentially
showering even if I don't soak in the tub afterwards.
I'm taking my handheld thing and sitting in my tub and showering and then just like sitting
there while the, I don't know and that's like it's better progress.
I mean that in my depression now with the 20 milligrams of Alexa Pro is definitely better
than like last year when I wasn't showering for five days.
You know what I mean, or three days.
So it's definitely better.
And sometimes a larger will sit in there with me because I'm just, I don't have the energy.
It's a small wind.
So, you know, like you have to look at the small winds.
I caught myself when I sent you photos of me like pressure washing and I'm you know planning
flowers or whatever and your response was I don't know how you do it all.
Like I wish that I could do that. It made me feel guilty because I'm like maybe
I shouldn't have sent her that. Oh no don't do that. But I'm like maybe this
will like encourage her to want to do it. I'm like I just
want Kale to like pressure wash. Well, Alisha scared me the other day because he I asked him about it.
He was like 300 PSI will cut your skin. Ma'am, this happened to me. And I was like I know when I
my mom's old husband, ex-husband used to pressure wash or apartment, he owned like a duplex.
Yeah.
And he would tell me to stay in the house and don't open the windows or come outside because
if he was pressure washing, he, you know, burned off my face.
And I was like, what the fuck?
What?
Yeah, because he was like, it's so strong.
Like, you don't want to get it.
Yeah.
So wait, did you, that happened to you?
Yeah.
So I, so many people had sent me messages like on Facebook and Instagram about my love
for pressure washing and like I love sometimes I'll get like these reels of people like pressure
washing or I'll see like ticktocks of people pressure washing and it's so satisfying to
like look and see like all the filth just like coming off and you're like yes I have arrived
like I love this.
So people told me that make you horny are really funny.
So people hit me messages when I posted a video pressure washing.
It was like, Lindsay, you should not be pressure washing and flip
thoughts. And I'm like, it's just like fast water.
Like it's like not a big deal.
Not a big deal.
Everybody needs to chill out.
Like obviously I know what I'm doing.
I've been pressure washing for some time
and like I'm fucking good at it, okay?
Got my pressure washer out the last time
and got a bunch of stuff like on my hand.
So I didn't wanna like touch something else.
So I thought, okay, I'll just like use this little thing and like try to like do last on the
lever. And when I did, honey, it tore off my cuticle. No. And then my finger started bleeding everywhere.
So then I was like, fuck, like I have just defeated the entire purpose of what I was actually doing and every person
I'm going to
Apologize to for saying that I know what I'm doing because very clearly I did not know what it was doing or
The ability that the water had to be able to cut you like that. So it was 300 psi
Well, I don't know what PSI it is, but evidently it was PSI enough
to fuck me up. That's actually terrifying because had you did it over your foot or something, all of your
Tony-Els would have been gone.
Gone, honey.
They would have been gone.
Okay, so we got this long message on Facebook from a listener. And I wanna read it.
It's very relatable to all the things
that we've just been talking about.
And it says, I would love if the girls could discuss
their point of view of just showing up
because they have to and the pressure
because they are in the spotlight.
They can't just say, oh well, no podcasts this week
because I'm not feeling it.
Kale has been talking about her,
how her depression has been hitting hard and shares with us,
but for people who may not know, and they tune in to an episode or on whichever podcast
you may hear her laughing giggling and basically just pushing through for the episode.
Lindsay talks about her separation anxiety and family issues and she still shows up.
I feel like some people forget, influencers, celebrities, etc. are people as well.
Even though from the outside, it may look like they have it all, they battle with things
as well. When something isn't posted on time or a live stream is rescheduled or something
isn't consistent, people tend to say, oh, they're lazy or they don't care about their
fans. It's like one minute, some people relate to depression and such. But just because
they have a spotlight on them, depression is supposed to just go away and they are supposed to show up and please
the people.
I screen shot at that this morning because I was going to bring it up today too.
Great minds think alike.
I wouldn't really say we have great minds honestly, delete that.
Don't, don't delete that.
No, but that's a really good point.
And I think that I have, I think that I've also been guilty
of, you know, looking at other people that I, you know,
support on TV or social media and things like that.
And I also forget that they're real people.
They're not just characters that, you know, they,
they actually go through shit.
And, yeah, it's very difficult
because there's so many times where I've just been like,
I don't wanna get ready, I don't wanna podcast,
or I don't wanna go do this, or I don't wanna go do that.
It's just, yeah, we're on a podcast and yeah,
we've been on TV, but we are just like everybody else
in that way where some days we're just not feeling it.
I feel like you have to look at life in seasons and a lot of times
when you're in a different season than someone else. It's easy to judge somebody
else's season that they're going through when it looks different than yours.
And sometimes, and this has happened to me before, where I'll be going through
something and, you know, people can't relate to, you
know, like whatever it is.
And then those same people will send me messages months or, you know, a year later and be like,
you know, I remember when you were going through this and you were vulnerable about it and
talked about it and I didn't understand your perspective then, but I understand it now.
And I think that we just have to learn as human beings
that we're all going through different stuff.
We're all human.
Everybody's life does not look the same.
And the one thing is that we all have the same 24 hours
in a day and we can choose how we use it, right?
But with that being said, there are lots of things
that are thrown, I feel like it us
that look very differently than some people.
And then there are things that are thrown at us
on a daily basis that look very much the same
as anybody who's listening to this podcast.
And so I think sometimes the combination of those two things,
the regular, just like normal existence of our life,
but then the other part of it,
that people who are listening to this would not relate to,
when you try to mesh those two together,
it can be really, really hard.
Yeah, no, I agree with you, it definitely can.
And I mean, for me, like the separation anxiety
and family stuff, I'll be completely transparent here.
A lot of people have their opinions
about things that have gone on with my family
and the reconciliation.
And if it was sincere, if it was, you know, they sent sincerity from one side
and, you know, not other sides.
And hearing all of that and knowing that there are things that my family is actually going
through behind the scenes that nobody knows about, you know, sibling disputes and could you imagine?
I mean, you probably can,
and probably you're going to relate to this
from being on a TV show that had like a collective cast.
But when you are publicly, you know,
posting stuff to the amount of people
that you're posting to, right?
Or you're publicly talking about things to the amount of people that you're posting to, right? Or you're publicly
talking about things to the amount of people who are listening to your bullshit.
When you have family who is also involved in that same business and you're all going through
a traumatic situation and you're all handling things very differently, sometimes I feel
like it's harder knowing that my family is watching
things that I'm posting because I'm gonna get chewed up about something that
maybe either one person doesn't agree with or might get chewed up about hell.
I don't know if I said that the sky was blue but somebody else thought it was
great. Right. Yeah, well it's like everybody's perception, right?
Like how you perceive certain things or how you handle certain things might not be how your siblings do.
And that can definitely make for a harder family dynamic when everyone's not on the same page.
And, you know, as far as social media and, you know, podcasting and not wanting to show up,
myself for the most part, and I want to speak,
so just, you know, just for myself,
I absolutely love podcasting.
And I want to show up at all times.
Sometimes I don't feel like I am the best at my job
on a certain day, depending on what's going on,
but I enjoy showing up.
Social media is a little bit different for me though. That is a place that you will find me
ghosting, and that is how I deal with separating myself to avoid maybe family drama that's going on or you know it's like damned if you
do, damned if you don't, situations. If you say one thing then you know
somebody thinks that you mean this and if you say another thing somebody thinks
that you you know me and that and you can't do anything right so lately I have
been ghosting on social media mainly to avoid drama.
Okay, I go social media just on accident when I'm going through depression or
depressive episodes, but that makes sense because all your whole family is on
social media, so if there's, you know, any family drama that is on social media,
I could definitely see why you would be
like never mind. Yeah, just like, you know, forget it. And then I will tell you two
different occasions that was very hard for me to podcast was when I was going
through my divorce. And I got my divorce finalization and immediately podcast.
And I'm immediately podcasted.
And I'm liking it.
It's on my schedule and this is the time that we do it.
And I'm just gonna do it.
That was the one.
So I had no processing time in between knowing that,
that everything was final and got all of my paperwork
to that.
The other was when I signed my settlement agreement through the
divorce was on the same day that I signed over all the equity to will on our
marital home and gave him his settlement from that and signed all of the
papers at a closing attorney's office left left directly from there, came home, hopped on my computer,
and recorded coffee con vests.
And it's a double edged sword, right?
Because in one, on one hand,
you want to be able to open up to that about it,
to some degree, to our listeners.
But then on the other hand, it's like,
you don't have any time to process it,
and you don't want to put your foot in your mouth
by saying things based on whatever you're feeling in that moment without giving yourself time to, you know,
grieve a loss or grieve the divorce or grieve the equity in your marital home. Like those are all
real things and you know, it's just a weird, it's like a double-edged sword because you want to
share it but then you don't know if you should wait How long should you wait?
And I've definitely been guilty of just talking about things too soon. I mean there is
For me, you know that I never and what I'm about to say I
Think people might be shocked about anything that I ever say on this podcast
I never asked for anything to be edited out. Yeah, that's true.
That's true.
That's true.
Because I live off of the mindset of if I was
ballsy enough to let it come out of my mouth, knowing
that I was on a recording, knowing what I owe the listener
to be honest and vulnerable.
If I said it, I'm gonna ride with it.
So that's just it.
And, you know, has that kicked me in my ass
more times than I'm probably willing to admit?
Yes.
It has.
Has it caused turmoil in my personal life
with my ex-husband, suburban dad, you know, just ex-wives,
which is another thing that I'm about to talk about in a second, but yeah, it's
caused problems. But at the end of the day, I feel like it's okay because I have come on here and I've been honest and I'm living my truth
and being in the moment in my feelings. Yeah. And there's sometimes though that stuff happens when I don't have a recording,
and then I have more time to like process something.
So the way that I might deliver it on the next recording
would sound very different than in the moment
of me living it.
Right, right, right, right.
I could definitely say any certain things
that I've said on my podcast on any of them,
mainly this one.
Typically people in my life only have a problem with this one,
but I have been chewed out by more people
than I would be willing to admit, for sure.
I know them.
Yes, you do.
Yes, you do know them.
I'm pretty sure I'm gonna just say this,
and then I'm gonna move on from it,
that you have received
Emails regarding my mouth. Oh, yeah, oh, yeah, and before emails texts and DMs. Yeah, for sure
I'm gonna say what the fuck I want to like what do you want me to say to her like you think I control what she says
I don't control what she says and I frankly I don't give a fuck. Like honey, my parents have been trying to control that
since I was...
The day you were born.
I walked out the womb.
So when you figure it out,
when you figure it out, let me know sweetie.
This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp.
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Therapy is going so good.
I am coming up on my three-year mark so still behind you,
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Okay, so we had a topic that came up
that I found to be very interesting
because we have experienced it on both sides.
X-wives, we are one.
And we dealt with them.
I haven't dealt with an X-wife, although,
I don't know if you saw it in our group chat with the Kitty Gang,
but I took Isaac to an appointment yesterday
and Elijah's X-wife was walking directly in front of me.
Oh, did you guys speak?
I'm in exchange.
And exchange niceties?
Absolutely not. Why?
Am I asking too many questions?
I've never met that girl. I would not speak to her. I have no reason to speak to her.
And she was with a man. So I just let it rock.
Well, I have had experience with ex-wives. Typically, ex-wives, just like in general, just are not, you know, a big supporter or fan.
I love when they go to my podcast pages and their eyeballs get about this large at the
shit that we talk about and spew out of our mouths.
I can understand, but in the same sense, I can't, because in my mind, and
I know it's my mind, I am just a suburban mom.
Like, I'm just out here living my life, talking my shit on my podcast, like doing my thing.
She's talking my shit on my podcast.
Host and funny shit, like, on my story that I think is hilarious that I've laughed at,
that I want everybody else to laugh at,
like literally just live in my life, raise in my son,
and for whatever reason, it's this influencer,
podcaster, reality TV personality words
that have become attached to me as a human being
that it's like I don't fuck with her and that's very hard because I don't I
never go into any situation. One thing that I will say am I toxic in some
senses? Absolutely. We all are. Absolutely. Will I be toxic? Absolutely. If you push me far enough,
and I going to come out on top,
probably absolutely because I'm gonna be a bigger bitch.
But with that being said, I don't go looking for for fights.
Like I go into every situation open-minded.
Like I can rock with you if you try to rock with me,
but if you're not and you come out guns blazing,
then too, gonna be pointing back at you.
Okay, and that's fair.
So I love when people have opinions about you though
that have literally never met you.
That's my favorite.
That's my favorite.
Well, I told you all the story about my old neighbors at my old house, I think, when they were just
like, we've seen you on the show.
And it's like, okay.
Like, what's as opposed to me?
Like, we've seen you on the show.
And I've seen you pull into your driveway.
Does that, I don't know you from a fucking can of paint.
It's like, honey, like, when certain stuff has been said about me, I'm just like, if
you only knew, I'm actually worse than you don't like.
Like, you are such a troll, first of all, but like, secondly, you have spent more time
looking me up than my biggest hater.
So like, number one, thank you. And number two, I'm glad that up than my biggest hater. So like number one, thank you.
And number two, I'm glad that you're so bothered.
And number three, nothing that you say
is gonna change anything that's going on.
So like get happy in the same pants that you got
fucking mad in.
Pfft.
Pfft.
Pfft.
Pfft.
Pfft.
Oh my goodness.
It's like I'm not coming in. Like especially people that have kids with somebody else.
It's like I'm also an ex-wife, so I'm probably the best type of one to get boot up with
your ex-man because I very much can relate to the shit that you're going through.
I'm also dealing with it with my ex-husband.
Are you guys on good terms right now?
Yeah, we're, you know, we had a little spat
because he wanted it to be dumb over the weekend.
And Jackson was barfing his brain south.
And Will was screaming on the phones,
hey, Squid boy, hey, Squid boy, like a hundred times.
And I'm like, first of all, you sound like you need to go to bed because you sound like
you've had one too many.
And like, I don't have the patience to deal with you.
Nortezar's not have the patience to deal with you.
So therefore, I'm logging off of this phone call.
And do not call back.
I felt like the scene in my girl where Veda comes out and she's like, don't
come back for five to seven days. That was me with Will.
I never saw that movie.
Wait, what?
Never seen that movie.
You've never seen my girl?
No.
Okay, that is a task that I am putting on your list. You didn't approve this, but you're
doing it. Like,
I just read a funny meme in our group on Facebook.
It says arriving in hell, that would be me and you.
Me, oh my God, it's you.
I'm a huge fan of your eggs,
because you guys know I love doubling, the devil.
Nothing, he says,
I'm a huge fan of your eggs.
What?
Guida.
Listen, I found the funniest meme
and nobody's gonna think it's as funny as me.
But like the funniest one and I laugh at it every morning
and it's now my screen saver.
It says everything Gucci with you and.
I'm good with it, I'm best.
It is good will at best, my dude.
Like nothing's Gucci honestly nothing nothing.
So I'm glad that you know people think that it is if your life is everything's
Gucci in your life that's good for you but it's like just not for me.
I'm annoying because actually I was really excited for this week this past weekend
because I didn't have any of my kids.
I know that sounds bad but I just really needed it. My kids were on a thousand last week,
and especially Luxin Creed, like they're arguing, is at an all-time high. So I was like,
all right, but everyone's going to their dads. I'm like, I'm going to have myself a pool weekend.
It's good. I thought it was going to be nice. It was freezing outside here all weekend,
and my pool was cold because I did not know how early to put the heater on in the pool.
And allegedly you put it on either like at night and let it get warm throughout the night and then it's warm in the morning or you could put it on first thing in the morning and it'll be ready by like mid afternoon.
So I put my feet in as soon as I put my feet in I took them and I went back to, I went back in my bed and I watched Trash TV.
Wow, I love that for you.
Sounds like an honest clusterfuck
and sounds right on brand for everything that you are right now.
Outside of that, I found this TikTok
and I actually wanted to send it to you and almost did
and I was like, you know what, no,
because I feel like everybody else needs to hear this.
It says, I don't need to draw a line in the sand and say, if you cross this, I'm done with you.
I have boundaries and if you cross them, you are leaving me.
The saying, I'll take care of you if you take care of me as selfish.
I'll take care of me so that I can take care of you and you take care of you so that you can take care of me as much better.
I agree with that. I wholeheartedly agree with it. But that's like, go ahead.
I feel like that's on therapy though. Yeah, and also, I mean, if you ever have read that
nobody will ever be a hundred percent in a relationship all the time, if somebody
in the relationship is at an AD,
the other person is gonna give 20.
And if somebody is at, they just can't do it
in their depressed or whatever,
the other person has to make up for it.
And so, I agree with that.
You have to be in a good place in order to take care
of anybody else.
The same, when moms get shamed for going out
or for filling their cup or for doing something without their kids and it's like, how do you expect me to give
my all every single fucking day of the week 365 days a year and never fill my own cup?
I mean, like I said, my kids were on a thousand last week.
I could not get them to Chris fast enough because I was just so overstimulated and I just feel like
had they not gone away for the weekend and I you know got them back on Sunday
It would or Monday it would have just been I don't even know like I probably would have I don't know
The I don't need to draw a line in the sand and say, if you cross this, I'm done with you,
is something I'm very guilty of and have been guilty of
in every relationship that I have been in
except the current one that I am in.
Mm, is that a soft launch?
Are you minding my business?
Cause kind of sounds like it.
I have tried really, really hard to do everything in my current relationship
very differently than I've done anything else and actually apply the things that I've
learned from therapy versus just knowing about them and not doing anything with it. And my relationship with Will, very early on,
there were major deal breakers for me and boundaries
that I felt like I was clear on.
But now looking back on it,
I feel like it was more of a ultimatum
that I was setting if you do this,
then I am setting if you do this,
then I am done with you. And I would repeatedly say that over and over
and the same things would happen.
Instead of I have boundaries,
and if you cross them, you're choosing to leave me,
I feel like that plays so much better
because it puts the responsibility back
on the
other person. You are establishing, this is my boundary. And if you cross this
boundary, you are making that choice to exit the room. Right. And then it becomes
less of an ultimatum because it's just your choice. Same thing with my
situation with suburban dad. I did the exact same thing, drawing a line in the sand like you cheated on me once,
and now, you know, I'm gonna try to reconcile with you
and, you know, kids are involved
and I feel like that's the right thing to do at the time.
And I should have number one,
if you have established a boundary and someone repeatedly crosses the
same one, then they don't have any respect for you.
Right.
Right.
And so I had to learn that it wasn't me choosing to leave.
It was the person's action in both situations that they had to leave.
Right. They made the choice when they
did the action. That's true. Loved it and think that everybody should basically
live by that. The summertime is here and my kids and I are on the go constantly
and one thing I'm always worried about in the heat because we never know what
we're gonna be doing or how active we're gonna be is if we're hydrated enough.
So I have been using liquid IV for years.
And now that my kids are old enough, I'm like,
okay, we're gonna hydrate two times faster than water.
And liquid IV has five essential vitamins B3, B5, B6, B12,
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They're not, I don't know, I just get nervous
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and I'd rather have something that's non-GMO
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So we love liquid IV at our house.
I heard about liquid IV from you years ago
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My water intakes not the greatest,
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Mom takes it, Cory takes it,
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during the hotter weather.
It's honestly a lifesaver at this point.
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Also their Pina Calada Elijah works outside
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just look what Ivy Edelts, just save your life.
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You think Vanderpav rules is messy now?
It's always been messy.
I'm Jack Taylor, the LG Pup Rules villain.
And I'm Brittany Cartwright, wife of the OG villain.
And we've got a new podcast when reality hits.
We'll definitely be talking about Vanderpump rules
past and present and oh my,
scandaball.
And you'll get a look at what life is like for us now
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And friendships and definitely feuds.
It's our real reality with and without cameras.
And sometimes with special guests like our celebs friends,
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But listen to and follow when reality hits with us,
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This is a really good one,
and I feel like we both dealt
with narcissists. So I love
narcissists for some reason.
And various aspects of my life,
whether it be, you know,
family related or relationship related, you know.
But I hate that I have had a pattern with them. I'm never going to, I'm never going to be, well,
let me never say never. I won't, I will do my best not to allow myself to ever be with one again,
but for some reason I have a pattern with them. I saw this one tick-tock sometime in the past like seven days and it was
talking about basically the childhood traumas that you deal with that are unresolved traumas
that a lot of times those things will manifest in relationships that you choose to be in because of that unhealed stuff. And I feel like
that's why outside of my current relationship, I have kind of gravitated towards situations
with narcissism involved. It says, need advice, how do I tell a narcissist that I'm done?
I've tried to leave in the past and he always manipulates and scares me. So I come back and I can't relate to anything
more. I feel like narcissists are really good at trying to control narrative and a situation.
And when they feel like the control is removed from them and you're making a choice to do something different than what they want you to do,
they're always going to use manipulative tactics and scare tactics to try to get you to do exactly what they want you to do. the opposite of love, they will love bomb you and make you believe that they've changed.
I've also really related to this and the only way that I was able to fully move on, not,
let me not say the only thing part of it was him having a baby with someone else.
You all already know how I feel about that, but no contact.
That's, you have to go no contact and it's going to hurt.
It's going to be painful.
You're going to want to look at what they're doing.
You know, you're gonna romanticize and fantasize
the good parts of the relationship,
but with time and distance,
that is going to be your saving grace
because that will be what eventually opens your eyes
to seeing that like, it's not as good as you ever thought it was.
Even the good times are not that good. I think the whole thing of no contact
is a must and very necessary.
I think when there's a constant line of communication
or even sporadic communication,
there's still that open communication of two people
that likely the situation is toxic and that's why you got there are still in a pattern of some sort.
And so you have to remove yourself completely from any pattern that you found some time for you to actually create new patterns
and, you know, to be able to think what is actually healthy because you are in such a state
of unhealthy that what you were doing, you had changed your mind to think that that was
a healthy thing.
Right.
Yeah. And like it, I have been in very unhealthy situations.
And I do feel like it's a common thing
that narcissists do.
They love bomb and they like to give gifts
and do whatever they want you to do.
Do whatever they want you to do. My advice would be to cut off
all contacts called Turkey. I won't even do the pickups and drop-offs if I don't have to.
You know what I mean? Like if Natalie is able to do them and she's willing,
there's no reason for us to even see each other. And you know, it takes a lot to get to that point too,
because I think a lot of people find themselves in situations of,
I don't want to be in that, but I'm still curious.
And so the small amount of communication,
whether it be in person or over the phone,
they want to be out, but they also still want to have access to some extent because access
means a little bit of control.
And so when you can relinquish all care of wanting no communication and you have zero
desire for that person to see anything that you're doing, what you're looking like, what
outfit you're wearing.
You know, we've all been there, where it's like,
you want your ex to feel like they lost something really good,
but once you get past that point,
and you have arrived to where you are,
I feel like that is the most healthy thing.
Getting to that point is not easy, and it's gonna hurt,
and it's not, I don't think that anyone ever said
it would be a cake walk,
but it's definitely worth it in the end.
And, you know, it's a weird thing to say now on the other side of it.
Chris and I, having no communication, has been probably the best. This has probably been the best
our co-parenting relationship has been. We're not friends. We're not friendly.
We are typically just communicate through Natalie.
Natalie does the pickups and dropoffs,
and this is if you are dealing with an narcissist
that you have children with.
Chris and I don't fight right now.
We're not fighting right now
because there's nothing to fight about.
We have Natalie to communicate through.
And like this morning I emailed him about a book.
I was like, hey, do you have this book
from Lexa's school?
No, okay, cool. End of
conversation. There's nothing to fight about when it comes to that. You know, so it's not a
cakewalk, but definitely no contact or low contact. Anyway, we also, no way. I gotta tell you
before we do foul play, we also went through the who has this book from the library. Oh my God, they want to charge me for it. And I'm like, it's something.
I'm like, I'm not paying for this $20 book
that is clearly at neither of our houses.
And Jackson's like, oh, that book's on my teacher's desk
because I got in trouble and she took it.
And I'm like, then why is this book emailing me?
Right, like, I'm like, I don't even remember seeing the book
that they want looks to pay for.
I've never seen it. You're like, so evidently, it was never at my house. And then there seeing the book that they want looks to pay for. I've never seen it.
You're like, so evidently, it was never at my house.
And then there was another book that they wanted me to pay for
that has been in his book bag.
He has like a reading bag and then a regular folder
and the reading, it was in the reading bag
and it was in there for like six weeks.
I just, and the teachers usually
checked the backpacks in kindergarten.
So I was like, why hasn't your teacher taken this back?
I'm not paying for it.
Anyway, let's go to play.
Hi ladies and fellow listeners. I breastfeed my seven-month-old daughter and she's starting to get
adventurous while on the boob. She will play with my hair, pull up my brush strap, tap the opposite
boob, the list goes on. I let her do these things because I know babies learn through experience
and the world around them. Well this morning I did not put two and two together. Towards the beginning of
the feeding session she was tracing my armpit then slowly made her way up to my
shoulder etc. I was labeling my body parts for her as she made her way up to my
mouth. She stuck her hand in my mouth and I immediately tasted my armpit from
earlier before I could tell her mouth. I don't know about you, but my postpartum body odor is so foul.
I wash my body every day and have to reapply the odor
in every couple of hours.
Yes, I washed her hands immediately after she was done nursing.
Hope you enjoyed hearing how my seven month old did me dirty.
Love what YouTube brings to the table every week.
I don't know what it is about childbirth and just being a mom. Every child that I had
made my body odor so foul. Wait, wait, wait, but does it get better? Um, yes, like with years in between,
but like, especially after looks, I had to start getting the Botox in my armpits because it was so bad.
Was it just like you sweat more after or is it just like the actual odor itself?
I think a combination of both because you know how you go through like the hot sweats, cold sweats,
like that, the thing, the hormones balancing out and then just like all of it smelling worse.
the hormones balancing out and then just like all of it smelling worse.
I did talk to my doctor about it and he said that if you use antibacterial soap, like the dial that orange dial soap, that's what the bacteria is, what smells.
So he was like,
allows dial antibacterial soap in your armpits.
So not to put Isaac's business out there, but he's also going through puberty. And so I did the same for him. I was like, use this dial soap for your armpits because this,
you know, it'll help. And then also I use men's deodorant. So him and I both used men's deodorant.
But I don't know if this is good or bad. It's probably bad. But I also, after I shower, whether
it's at night or in the morning, no matter what, I put the odor in on right away.
So, fresh out the shower at night,
I even, like, I'm not gonna sweat in the middle of the night,
but I do put it on because I'm just scared,
I don't wanna smell.
Okay, so, two things.
I use dial, that's the only soap in my bathroom.
Like, for body wash, it's just dial.
I wash my vagina out with it, my butthole, my
pits, I shave with it, like I'm big believer on antibacterial soap, like why not?
Like we we need it. So there's different variations of that dial, but I'll post
the one that that I have and I absolutely love it and don't deal really with
Body odor, but I can't really relate because it's been so long since I had a baby that like I can't remember
Back then if that was a thing. I'm not naturally like a huge sweater though
However, it's weird that this even came up because I have a girlfriend who's a blogger
who just had a baby and she was talking about it on her Instagram and like the postpartum
body odor and I'm like, I don't remember having it like maybe I did, um, but I don't remember
having it and I also use men's deodorant. Like I don't use any women's deodorant ever.
Yeah, okay. So, and also I do put on deodorant before bed. Like it's the process looks like dial down,
you know, and like you're just like scrubbing every crevice of your body. And then I do the organ oil and I'm dripping like a glazed donut and then I, you know,
brush my teeth, put on the deodorant and men's deodorant and I use heres,
uh, heres deodorant and then get out, uh, put on my pajamas and go to bed and I never wake up
with body odor, but I'm just wondering if it's like the antibacterial soap that I've used for so long.
Yeah, I mean, I, that's what the doctor told me to do was antibacterial soap.
I also had no idea that it was from bacteria. I thought that just different people's pH smell different.
I was told it was the bacteria, but maybe different people's pH produces different amounts of the bacteria.
Yeah, so that's so interesting. Well, have you also seen
there's like one company that has these deodorizing wipes and I think I bought them for Thailand.
And I feel like a lot of people probably use those. I had some of my purse for like like my car
bag, you know, like whatever, for like a while,
and I would use them like after a workout or something like that.
So that's also like something that you could possibly use, but that's about as good
of advice that I can give.
Well, I think that was good advice.
The next foul play says, two years ago for Valentine's Day, I decided to try and spice
things up for my fiancee and I. I went to Starship a few days before and found a cute little bop.
I couldn't think crystal on the end.
When our daughter went down for her nap on Valentine's Day, I decided that was the perfect time
to show him his presence and we decided to try it out.
I hit him with the reverse cow girl and everything was going great until he finished.
As I got out from the position, I felt my butt trying to swallow the plug.
So I sit up fast and pull it out, big mistake.
When I stood up, my butt hole did in fact swallow it.
I went to the toilet to try to get it out,
but after trying for a few minutes,
it quickly came swollen.
So my fiance called 911.
I'll never forget having to tell the 911 ditch dispatcher
that I had a butt plug stuck in my butt when the EMS got there. Good to be my younger girls and
they were so nice about the situation and tried to get it out. They couldn't so off to the hospital
I went. This is when I started to freak out because they started talking about surgery after seeing the x-ray.
Finally, this big man comes up and inserts a balloon up there and sticks his hand up my butt hole and pulls it out.
They had to nurse, they had the nerve to ask me if I still wanted it.
My fiancee, well, forever be scarred to try that again.
First of all, wait, have you ever used a butt plug?
Yeah, I have, but I've, I've, do you like it?
I don't love butt play. Like, I really don't. Okay. I just needed to know that for whatever reason. I needed to know that.
My whole thing is, and I'm not judging this girl by any means,
but when you stand up, your butt hole compared to when you go in.
Goes in.
You write, and so I wouldn't, I think she was in a state of panic,
so I'll give her that.
But thinking about it while reading this,
I would think you would want to like,
squat and put like bare down.
I mean, you know, I'm honestly thinking like,
downward dog, like yoga position or something,
you know, like where it's gonna,
like possibly spread your asshole.
But she did say she'd try to sit on the door,
but that was after her butts basically swallowed the butt plug.
I just,
Could you imagine like your asshole just swallowing something?
I mean, my butt cheeks are so deep
that like, I would, they would have to give me surgery
because they'd have to spread my butt cheeks so far
Wait, how do you know how like how do you back up?
What what's deep butt cheeks like what's that like I?
Definitely don't have it like when you
Like if someone was to eat my ass they would have to spread my butt cheeks apart to get there.
How far are we talking?
So like, like this and it's like,
like picture, but, okay, you're picturing a butt
and there's a crack.
My crack, deep-wise, is a solid five inches.
Wait, but has it always been like that?
Like have you always had deep crack?
Oh, always.
And my butt crack also goes so far up my back.
My mom said she used to make fun of me as a baby
because my butt crack would be so high up my lower back.
What?
It's a weight gain, I think.
I don't know.
No, because if you had it when you were a baby.
Oh, I meant the deep cheeks thing, but the butt crack thing.
The butt crack thing, you know, I, oh, I meant the deep cheeks thing, but the butt cracked things.
The butt cracked thing, no,
I don't think I ever grew into that.
I'm gonna say that I have a shallow butt crack and no ass.
So, oh, Matt, no, we're gonna go.
Yeah.
Um, sorry about the butt plug.
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See ya.
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