Coffee Convos with Kail Lowry and Lindsie Chrisley - Fan Mail, Foul Plays & Feedback

Episode Date: June 24, 2026

CC: 484 In this bonus solo Coffee Convos episode, Kail catches listeners up after the first leg of tour, shares a heartfelt fan gift that brought both laughs and tears, and reads a moving letter from a recent high school graduate whose story of perseverance and loss left a lasting impact.Kail also addresses recent listener feedback about the podcast, discusses the challenges of navigating change in real time, and offers an honest look at the growing pains Coffee Convos is experiencing. Plus, she shares behind-the-scenes details from tour, favorite stops along the way, thoughts on live shows, parenting updates, and a listener-submitted foul play about rebuilding trust after years of infidelity.Get your Fatherless Behavior Tour Tickets hereFor full videos head to patreon.com/kaillowry To send in your Foul Plays email us at [e-mail] you for checking out our sponsors!Merit: Right now, Merit Beauty is offering our listeners their Signature Makeup Bag with your first order at meritbeauty.com.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

I hate gift giving and receiving. Receiving gifts is so weird. What do you say thank you? This is coffee convo's with Kail Lowry and Lindsay Crisley. I really want you to be in your feels, Kail. That does not interest me whatsoever. I feel very attacked by you. A spirited discussion about motherhood, friendship, family, and life in the public eye.

I'm just not with a fakery anymore. There's a fakery bakery bakery around here. Here's Kail and Lindsay. Good morning, Coffee Convo's podcast. I hope you're listening from wherever you are. and you're safe and warm in your home because I'm tired and I'm safe and warm in Delaware. It's been a wild freaking week and I actually forgot that I needed to do this episode. And so I had to text Alessandra in Podcast One and see if there was a way for us to release it on Wednesday.

It's up Monday. It's been a whirlwind of a week. So to start things off, I got a package from none other than our kitty cat, Heather Lomeyer. So I figured I would open the package here on coffee combos. So Ike did slice it open for me. And Heather is always so thoughtful with her gifts. I have this little frog turtle situation on my desk. But she sent Lux and Creed are also audience members today.

They're in the office with me. She had sent this for me so I keep it on the desk. And this says, Kail, I wanted to send a little something to make you laugh and smile before you leave her tour, which unfortunately I didn't. get this package until after I got back from the first leg of tour, which is fine. Inside the zipper pouch, I made little notes for you to open right before each show. Just little notes of encouragement for you to take that quiet moment to yourself before you go on stage. I believe in you. Have a killer time and tour. Love you, Heather. I absolutely love this. And I thought it was

AI. She sent me a picture of little hand sanitizers with things on them. And I literally thought that that was like AI and she was being funny. But no, it's literal. Okay. Strep Killer Vibes. Killer Shits by Roadside. Which is true. Fishing for Knight, K-N-I-G-H-T, crawlers, which is so funny. And then sperm germ killer. I love this.

So we have those, which are amazing. Okay, these must be the positive little cards. I'm not going to open them because I'm going to take these with me on the road. But it looks like there's little notes folded up on them, which is so funny because so far, every single tour date I've said I'm going to. ship myself right before I go on. And then we have Ray's mystery freezer for ghost energy, which we will never know what was in that freezer. So we have Ray's mystery freezer. I'm going to put this in the fridge and I'm going to take this to my next tour date with me so that I can also

drink that there. Okay. Next we have some essential oils it looks like. Oh, okay. So you inhale these. It looks like you can't say those of you guys listening. The diagram looks like a tampon being shoved in your nose. Okay, so we have grapefruit, rose, eucalyptus, clove, lemon, and mint. So that'll be really good. Exfoliating foot mask. I need to tell you a story really quickly because this is so funny. I got my nails done before, like a week before I left for tour. And it was very apparent that I was going to need my nails done while I was on tour because when I get home, I probably wouldn't have time because I have all the kids with me. And like I said, I forgot about this recording. So they're in the office with me. Long story short, I go to go get

a nail fill and a pedicure in Nashville before my Nashville show. And I dropped me off and pick me up because we were in a rental minivan, which, by the way, don't sleep on those minivans. They are so comfortable and convenient. Probably won't buy one, but I absolutely loved it for rental. And I'm finishing up at the nail salon and he comes in, he pays for it and he walks over to me and he touches my feet. And he says, you know what that feels like?

And I told the story on stage because it happened in real time. but it was so funny because he's like, you know what this feels like? And he gets so excited because he said that my brand newly, brand newly, brand newly fresh, padicured feet smelled like wet fish. That's what he said. He was so excited because you know he's a fisherman. And I just laugh because I was like, that would be it. So I will be using this. Thank you, Heather.

And then we have a couple facial masks, collagen and vitamin C and then calm and refresh. I will need these. I will need these. So I can put all of this stuff right in this little pouch to take with on tour, which will be perfect. Heather, you're amazing. And I can even stick these. I can even stick these right in here as well.

So I put the masks and the foot pouch in. I put the masks and the foot mask in here. And then I can put the essential oils as well. Let's see what else we got here. Last but not least. Chilling like a villain. So cute. Let's see what's in here.

Oh, these are the notes. Oh, okay. I thought these are positive. Pick one and I'll make your day extraordinary. So these are positive shit little card things. And then these are what she was talking about. Okay, so I can bring both of these. Raise, if anyone wants a ghost sticker that says Ray's mysterious freezer.

Also, I wish that I knew how to make stickers and stuff. This is so genius. You want one? Take that over there. Why is my head bigger than cutting? I'm kind of cutting. I actually don't have scissors in here. Why is your what?

Why is my head bigger than before? I have no idea. Love these. Thank you so much, Heather. I will be bringing these little two little pouches with me on tour for the next leg. I have Anaheim. No, I have Phoenix and then Anaheim next leg. So I'm nervous about Anaheim.

Not Anaheim. I'm nervous about Phoenix. I have not been checking ticket sales because I have not been checking ticket sales because it's not, it doesn't matter. The people that show up for us, are so important to me and so important to Lindsay and you guys have been so sweet asking about Lindsay pretty much on every tour stop and I really appreciate that and I did go back to her and tell her that you know people were asking for her so that was really nice I also got something in the mail and I have not read this letter yet I did look at the picture but I got this letter

in the mail funny enough you guys know that I wanted I want to move to North Carolina and so this male came from North Carolina, specifically where we're trying to move. So I do feel like it's a little bit of a sign. Graduation is supposed to feel like a finish line, but for me, it's always felt more like a starting point. A step into something bigger, something uncertain, and something I've been quietly preparing for my whole life. On paper, my story might look simple. I'm at the top of my class with a 4.0 GPA. I've worked hard, stayed focused, and pushed myself to succeed academically. But what doesn't always show is everything behind that, what it took to get here. I'm going to start crying. I come from a family that doesn't always have the resources others might, and no one in my family has ever attended a four-year college.

My mom works as an EC teacher's assistant, and every day she does everything she can to provide for our family. Watching her work so hard taught me what perseverance really looks like. It showed me that success isn't about what you're given. It's about what you're willing to work for. I learned how to ask for help without really asking. I figured things out on my own when I had to. I stayed up late, pushed through doubts, and kept going even when things felt. overwhelming because quitting was never an option. Football became more than just a sport to me. It

became an outlet, a goal, and a path forward. It taught me discipline, resilience, and how to fight for something bigger than myself. I don't just want to go to college. I want to play football there. I want to earn that opportunity and prove that where you come from doesn't define where you can go. The biggest part of my story is in grades or sports. It's loss. Losing my sister to cancer changed everything. It gave me a perspective that most people my age don't have. It taught me, how fragile life is, but also how strong love can be. Every achievement, every milestone, she's part of it. She's the reason I push harder and the reason I don't take a single opportunity for great knit. So as I stand here on the edge of graduation in college, I carry all of that with me,

my family, my struggles, my goals, and her memory. I'm not just chasing success for myself. I'm chasing it for everything I've been through and everything I've lost. And this is only the beginning from Lucas. They didn't ask for anything. Please help congratulate Lucas for graduating McMichael High School, Class of 2026. He plans to attend Methodist University. I know. Congratulations. I just bawled my eyes out. That is so inspiring. And he didn't ask for it. I don't even know what to say. Nothing was asked for. Congratulations. This, you should be so proud of yourself. You should be so proud of yourself, and I wish you all the success in the world while you take on this next journey into college and playing football air.

That's incredible. So shout out the Lucas Smith. Nice. Okay. I just had to tell my kids to stop reaching over me. There's so much going on. For those of you guys who are listening and are not watching, it is very challenging for me to record at home with kids because you can hear them. You can see them. They want to be a part of it. And as much as I would love that, reaching over my desk and fumbling for you. things is really is a lot. So I just had to take a minute and then come back. But anyways, I am really sorry that I didn't get this episode out on time. I'm doing the best I can. And I think that I just want to say thank you again. I know that I said it in the beginning of

this episode, but thank you to everyone who has come out to any of my show so far. It really means a lot to me to just have your support and your encouragement. And anyone who has been on here that has been asking for Lindsay, please send her all a love and support right now while we're trying to work through 2026. I've said it a million times already, but I mean it more now than ever. It's like 2026 has really been a very challenging year for us. So I'm on tour these days and I need to feel and look my best. And I feel like everybody has new products coming out. But the best products aren't the ones that take up space. They're the ones that earn a permanent spot in your routine. And that's exactly what merit is known for. Okay. Beauty with intention. At a certain point, beauty stops

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That's a great option. And along with the cult favorites like the minimalist foundation stick and the flush balm and more, get the bomb. Okay, get the flush bomb. I just used it when I went to the Webby Awards. I'm obsessed with it. And right now Merit Beauty is offering my listeners their signature makeup bag with your first order at Meritbeautcom. That's M-E-R-I-T-Beautcom to get your free signature makeup bag with your first order. Merrittbeautcom. Also while we were in Nashville, so you guys know, Bunny pulled out of, I did post a statement and I guess people were still hoping to see Bunny and or realized last minute that she wasn't going to be there and I feel horrible. But I, there's always a silver lining, right? And instead of Bunny coming out, I got Kayla to come out.

Kayla also works with me and she is that Appalachian girl on socials. She's been one of my friends for a long time. And I think I had her on the podcast on Barely Famous probably in 2020, if I had to guess, something like that. And we've been friends ever since. And so it was so much fun having her come out. I got to meet Kayla's son in person, Benny. He was so funny. And he just reminded me so much of Lux and Creed. So I cannot wait to get them together. And we're going to exchange like tag names or whatever. And I might let the boys play on PlayStation if I know it's with him. So Lux is in the background doing a freaking dance about it. So we'll see. But anyways, I, the stories that, the stories that,

that, uh, the stories that Kayla told me like behind the scene before we ever even went on stage, we're so freaking funny. And y'all have to go follow her because truly she is, there's not a story that I was not laughing my ass off at. Like, truly, it was so funny. And I know that people were probably disappointed that it wasn't funny, but Kayla is also incredible. So go follow her. Um, she's great. And, um, outside of that, I genuinely have just been winging every single show. And I know a lot of you guys have been asking about where they're going to be. It is incredibly hard and also expensive to find someone to film them.

So Ike is on the mic in the crowds that I can do a lot of crowd work. And then I have to have someone running the merch tables. And then I have my guests. And so I have not been able to film an entire show. Lux would love to show you guys a drawing. Can I show them? He's been, we've been a Michael Jackson fan. family for a long time, if you guys know from years ago. But the movie has brought it back full

force to the point that the toddlers are obsessed with Michael Jackson. And so when Lux did his ceremony for third grade, he's now going into intermediate school. And so it's an entirely different school on a new schedule. And so intermediate school is just instead of like elementary school, middle school, high school, there's an intermediate school that you go to before you go to middle school. Yes. So fourth, fifth, sixth, I believe, or fourth and fifth. I'm in fourth. No, I know, but so I let the kids go to Walmart and pick something out. And Lux decided that he did not want to pick something out from Walmart. He wanted to get a Michael Jackson coloring book. And so he's actually been learning how to trace the pictures and then color them himself. So he's not actually coloring in the book. He's tracing.

And so he wanted to show the Michael Jackson. I think this is incredible. He's eight years old, so this is impressive to me. And I've seen a couple of things that are for, like, tracing. And he has, like, a sketchbook and stuff. So I definitely want to see what products I can get him for tracing so that he could do more of that. And he's been practicing all of his Michael Jackson dances, especially the moonwalk, which I think is pretty good. He does a pretty good moonwalk. So I'll have to take a video of it if he lets me and post it on the stories.

Can I take a video of you later? Yeah. Okay, cool. Cool. Green Giant. And then this is his Michael Jackson. Oh, well, it could be used for, this is Lincoln's Bad Bunny for when he was performing at his school. Green Giant.

Okay. Outside of that, let's go read some comments because I told you guys that I would be keeping up with the comments and what you guys have to say about CoffeeCobbles podcast. And so I want to see if the reviews got any better. So we're going to read them in real time. Okay. I'm scared. You guys are scaring me. Okay.

These are coffee combos reviews on Apple in real time. This is a five-star, this is a five-star review. And it says, this has been my favorite podcast for years. I've tried listening to others, but I always come back to coffee combos. Y'all are so funny and make a lot of your listeners feel like we're friends. Thank you for opening your lives and discussing hard things while also keeping it lighthearted. Thank you. That was really nice.

That was from a woman named Lydia. Okay. We have a one-star review. This is a one star review. She's very offended. I have listened from day one, and it's a slap in the face to call your audience dumb because of where we live. Kale lives under a rock and inside her little echo chamber. If I want to hear about politics, I would tune in to people who have knowledge in politics.

I'm over it. 6-11. Here we go talking bad about the South. You do realize your co-host is from the South. I think that while I understand what you're saying, it's a slap in the face, I wasn't calling you guys dumb. I was saying that the government treats the, is what I meant. The government treats the South like they're dumb and wants to keep them out of the know of things so that they are easier to manipulate.

And I'm really sorry if that was, if the way that I said it was offensive versus how I meant it. Talking, here we go again, talking bad about the South. I think that me saying that more corruption happens in the South, that has nothing. I'm not talking bad about the South. I literally want to move to the South. That's not what I was saying. I just, it's an observation, I think, of what I'm seeing in mainstream media for true crime. That was not calling our listeners dumb.

And I'm sorry if that's how it came off. That was not my intention whatsoever. Okay. We got a three-star review and it says, Lindsay fired. Saying that you can't update us legally, okay. Are you not even able to confirm whether Lindsay is coming back or not? Lindsay and I have a 50-50 business. Lindsay will be coming back. There was a lot of moving parts. So there was no way for me to answer that question before right now. How can we move forward and take what you guys are saying and restructure the show or figure out what the best course of action is regarding all of this? We are not intentionally being evasive for any of these questions or the feedback or anything like that. We're genuinely just learning as we go because we've never been in a situation like this. What is happening with this podcast lately? this is a one-star review. What is happening with this podcast lately? I've been an avid listener since

day one and loved all of the relatable parenting conversations even before I was a mom. The podcast has taken such a strange shift, especially after Kristen left and Alessandra became the replacement. Never mind, the lack of transparency with what is happening in their lives. Meanwhile, dropping breadcrumbs for the listeners just makes all of us feel excluded and like we're in a conversation of an inside joke we know nothing about. I know she's going through a hard time, but disappearing isn't the answer. And I feel bad for kale because at least when everything came out with Elijah, she still showed up even if she didn't address anything for a year, which is still really annoying. While I can tell Kayla's trying in this latest solo episode to keep everything afloat,

it's just not worth my time to listen to over an hour of foul plays and whatever documentary she's watching that I haven't. I really hope they can make a comeback and give us the podcast we used to know and love. Again, we have never been in a situation like this. And as far as I'm concerned, we started coffee combos podcast without Kristen and had coffee convos for many years without Kristen. So while I do understand that you guys got to know her and loved her on the podcast, that sort of structure is never going to come back, right? And I think with these conversations that Lindsay and I are having right now, we are able to kind of, we're planning

to come up with a plan for how to do all of this. I think that the general consensus is that you guys don't love when Alessandra chimes in, which is our fault because we have included her to chime in. So we're noting, we're listening, we're hearing you guys, and trying to come up with a game plan as far as that goes. Four stars. Thank you, Kail, for saying you will work on the cussing. I would be so grateful. Another one-star review three weeks ago. I used to love this podcast, and now I'm finding it hard to listen to, champagne problems and mean girl energy. Lindsay talks like she's better than everyone. It's giving bully and very judgmental. She seems like the type of girl I stay away from. I only listen because I follow Kail since the beginning of teen mom and

feel invested in her story, but again, getting a little out of touch, a budget of $650,000 for a beach house. Like, damn, I'm on the wrong side of Apple Podcasts. Okay. Yeah, we clearly need to restructure the show. We're aware of that. I just, it's hard because you guys want real-time updates. You want real-life stuff. And I understand that in some ways we can be really relatable and in other ways we can't. And I think that is the name.

I just think that's life, unfortunately. It's challenging because if we talk about co-parenting, I get a lot of heat about talking about my kids' dads. Like from the listeners, oh, okay. doesn't stop talking about them. It's old and tired. She's obsessed with Chris. She's obsessed with hobby. So if I talk about co-parenting, even when it's respectful, in a respectful way that is literally just relating to a conversation that maybe Lindsay brings up or a listener brings up, I get a lot of heat and a lot of backlash for talking about the kids' dads. But then if I talk about real-life stuff where, you know, at one point I had a budget for that amount for a

beach house, it's like I, then I'm not relatable and I'm out of touch. So we, are really trying to understand what it is that you guys want, but also with the understanding that life does change and we do maybe have champagne problems. Like I'm sort of at a loss because I want, I want the majority of you guys to be happy and to listen and to, you know, have the same fan base that we've always had all these years. But it's really hard when we can't, I mean, all of these comments are very different. So one of them is about Lindsay, it feels like Lindsay's Mean Girl. One of them is about, you know, Kristen's not here. One of them is about my budget for a beach house. Like, all of them are different and basically saying something about

every single option. So it's like, what are we left with at that point? You guys don't want me to discuss documentaries that you guys haven't watched. That was another comment that I got. You don't want to hear me talk about, you know, that we, that you guys haven't watched. What is it that we can talk about? Like, do you guys want to start submitting topics to us again? Like, I'm not really sure. The next one, two stars. I've been listening since day one, and over the past year, it seems like there's zero transparency. Nothing is addressed, and it's the same thing over and over again. This used to be one of my favorites, but I can hardly listen anymore.

We hear you, you know, where we're out there. We are desperately trying to make this work for you guys and just trying to figure all of it out. Okay, Jennifer Ray said she's ready to unfollow. Kail, one of your microphones is sounding really awful. I couldn't listen to your last episode as the guest Mike was difficult to listen to. Also, Elliot's was the same. I know, I, unfortunately, I don't know how to set up. up all the equipment myself. It's like newer on the newer end of like all of the different

types of technology that we've used. And Alessandra hasn't been here for the last two. So I was trying to set it all up on my own and I fully take accountability for that. Excuse me. I did post about it on social saying I'm really sorry about that. I am really sorry. I'm trying my best over here. Someone commented, I say this with all of all of the respect for Elliot, but I'm always bothered with Kale when Kale says he is a better human than her. I get what she's saying, but she discredits herself far too often. Kale, Elliot, is an extension of you. He is proof that when a child is well loved and not fighting for survival, they can do

extraordinary things. You, at his age, with an empty well, figured out how to create a life for him that would allow him to be the best version of himself. You did that. Thank you. I do appreciate that. They all have dads barely. Elliot is just good with the one-liners.

Okay, don't take that specific comment as Bible. Okay, can you please get these audio issues fixed? Couldn't listen to the last episode, only did today because the kids are on. I know, I'm sorry. Bear with us, okay? I am getting surgery. I'm getting my tonsils out on September 9th. So with that being said, we'll either have to pre-record episodes.

I don't know how you guys feel about that. I don't want to lose you guys at all, but I do also want to take all of these things into consideration, right? Like, I fully understand what you guys are saying. Okay. One says, been a listener since day one in this podcast is definitely not the same as it once was, which is fair because you guys have grown and changed and evolved. However, I think the podcast got lost somewhere in the mix. The secrets, breadcrumming, et cetera.

It gets confusing for listeners and a little bit and a little bit frustrating. So like I said, the secrets, breadcrumming, et cetera. It gets confusing for listeners and a little bit frustrating. So I like that you said you were going to learn to not bring things up unless you want to fully talk about it. I think it's just what we've all been asking for the last couple of years. I fully agree. I think the breadcrumming is really, it's frustrating when we do it. I don't think it's cute.

I don't think it's funny. I don't think it's like, I think it's one thing to do it in a marketing strategy. If you're like, oh, we're going to drop merch and it's coming soon. Do you have any guesses? Like I think breadcrumbing in that way might make sense. But I think as far as like our lives go, it doesn't make sense. And you're right. We should not be doing it.

And I'm, I will not, another comment under there says all the shit they talked about being Kristen and look at them now. I'm not, I don't believe that what I've said is talking shit in any way, shape, or form. I don't. And so I'm going to stand on everything that has been said so far as far as that goes. I don't know what else to say without kind of beating a dead horse. I think that we, we have a lot to discuss and a lot to think about. On another note, in the past, I guess, couple of weeks. weeks. I got to record with Tracy and Jessica for Bad Examples podcast. And that was interesting

because I recorded with them one other time, but we don't get to really hang out. Usually when we all get together, it's like work, right? So that was cool to like kind of chill at Becky's house and just like work and not have to like be on if that makes sense. I'm also not on right now. I got home from tour on Sunday and I've just been tired. I did not make it to therapy. This morning, unfortunately. I am medicated though today, so small wins. And then I was supposed to go record with a friend of mine who has two pet monkeys. I was going to go record with her today, but that also fell through. So we're going to reschedule that and she'll be on barely famous at some point. I don't know when. So that's where we're at. I met so many cool people so far on tour.

And I just want to shout out everybody who is in Cincinnati. Cincinnati, the people were so nice. I have never in my life met so many welcoming and nice people than Cincinnati. And I just feel like Cincinnati is so random. So last tour when I did barely fucking touring, funny enough I'm wearing a shirt. I did Columbus, Ohio. And I actually really liked that area of Columbus where we toured. And then this one specifically was Cincinnati. But like they are also on the cusp, like on the line of Kentucky, which was really so funny to me because I had no idea. If you guys don't, don't know who Gabby Egan is. You should go follow her on socials. I text. I think I told her in person, but I also texted it to her. Like, I'm blown away by the good vibes that I got from the people that

are in her circle. Like the people that she surrounds herself with, where she works, where she gets her hair done, all of the things. You can just tell that they're good people. And I have found that in this industry a lot of times, and Gabby and I talked about this is like, it's so transactional. Like you could ask somebody to come on the podcast and really vibe with them and you know they're a good person, right? And then never hear from them again. And so, and I'm guilty of that too. Like I'm not saying that I have no accountability to take. But like some life life, so you're in different states, different phases of life, whatever that looks like, right?

But I just felt like, okay, I could be friends with Gabby and Men for life. Like they are so cool. And that is exactly what happened with Matt. Like Matt and I vibes and then we continue talking. And so it's very few and far between that you get with creators or other podcasters. and can really hold on to that relationship. And so I hope this is one that I can keep forever because I absolutely love. I mean, even Kevin who works at Dicey Dies with Abby and her husband Cody was viving with Ike.

And so it was just, it was and then summer did my makeup. Meg did my, it was just the people were so nice and you could just tell they were genuine. So if you ever get the chance to go visit Cincinnati, it was, it was good energy. And then last week on the up on, last week on coffee convo's podcast, Elliot and I were talking about college and things like that. And he texted me last night and said, someone reached out to him, I guess, Cincinnati State is really well known for their interpreting program. Let me pull up the text that he sent me. So this was feedback that we got from last coffee comments episode.

A comment said to Elliot, once you narrow down your list, visit colleges in person. My cousin was accepted and went to a school without a visit and only stayed two weeks because the atmosphere was total chaos. which I thought was really good feedback for us. But then the next comment says, just a heads up, Cincinnati State has one of the best ITP interpreter interpreter training programs in the country. And so he sent that to me. And I texted him back because obviously he didn't get to go to Cincinnati with me.

And I said, Cincinnati was my favorite place this week. The people were so sweet. I literally loved it so much. And he said, oh, my God, I love that. We'll have to put it on the list. So I texted Gabby and Meg. And she was like, well, at least you know you'll have some people here to keep an eye on him if anything gets crazy.

So I thought that was cool. And I definitely want to go visit Cincinnati State if he's willing because that is such a fun place. I also had a really, I did have a really good time in Indiana. I've never been to Indianapolis and I had never been to Grand Rapids, Michigan. The last time I visited Kate and Ty was their wedding in Traverse City, I think it was called. And then before that, we had done like a fundraiser for a little girl probably 15 years ago maybe. and that one was, I think, closer to the Detroit area. So I had never been to Grand Rapids, and we had a really good turnout for all three of the first shows.

Nashville was a tougher crowd, tougher sell, but the people that did show up, showed up and showed out. And there was a ton of men at the Nashville show, which really, really surprised me. I never know if men are going, like, because their girl doesn't want to go alone or if they actually listen. And this one woman, her name was, I think it was Britta. She messaged me. I don't know if it was Britt or Britta. Hold on.

Let me look. her husband came and she's a principal at a school at a high school and she was so sweet and she was telling me about her husband and her husband said that he listens with her specifically to coffee combos but we'll listen to or no it was I think specifically to barely famous but nonetheless I'm thankful that you all came and I just thought that was so sweet because you know sometimes we talk about some things that men might not want to hear I mean it's clear some of the women don't even want to hear it so I really appreciate that and I think that was really cool so and I do think that even though, you know, it was a harder, like the venue was harder in Nashville and stuff.

It was more intimate, I felt. And also the Q&A was more intimate. And so I do appreciate that. And I'm thankful nonetheless. I told you all will show up. If it's one person or 100 people, I will show up if it doesn't matter. And I'm just thankful that you guys came. So if you didn't already know, my guest for Phoenix will be Ray Clark and also Alessandra will

be there. So I'm excited. I hope she wants to come on stage. I don't know. She'll probably let me know when she listens to this. episode. And then Anaheim is Ashley Jones, aka Ashley Siren from Team Mom. And I just know that one's going to be so much fun. She texted me and she's like, I'm down for whatever. So that one's going to be a fun episode. Well, not episode. That one will be a fun live show. And so if you

haven't already gotten your tickets, definitely get them. And I'm trying to think what else we have going on. This will air tomorrow. There will be a new episode of Coffee Combos podcast out on Thursday, regularly scheduled. And I think after that, I will see Lindsay before the next recording, if I'm not mistaken. Let me just double check on that before I misspeak. So regular scheduled episode Wednesday and then Thursday. I don't know. I have no idea what's going on. No clue. We will run just for the holiday week, the week of July, I guess. July 2nd will be a rerun, just so you guys know, that's not because anything is wrong. It's not because Lindsay and I are beefing.

It's not because the podcast is going away. It's just because it's a holiday weekend. And so we don't, we have, I think we've run best ofs usually over the holiday week. So that's the only reason why July 2nd will be a best up. Nothing is wrong. There's not, we're not going away. So I just wanted to give you guys a heads up on that. And then outside of that, I have watched maternal instincts, the crash, the nightmare upstairs.

I still haven't gotten to the Michael Jackson documentary, but you guys did tell me on social media that we should do a deep dive. Without putting all of that on Lindsay, I think I'll probably do a deep dive over on Barely Famous just because I know it's not everybody's cup of tea. And so I might do it over there on Barely Famous. And then I'm just wondering if you guys, how do you guys feel about me bringing Elliott for like one segment of one live show somewhere? I don't know where yet, but I got and I got to work out the schedule. because I'm touring when I don't have them. So I'd have to work that out. It would only be for one segment that would be safe for children.

Let me know how you think about that. And then also, if you have not already seen it, pumpkin will be my guest for Minneapolis. It's not Minneapolis. It's Minneapolis. Pumpkin is going to be my guest for Minneapolis. So that one will be interesting because I've never talked to her and I've never met her in person. So I never know how things are going to go when that happens. Like I was so nervous about asking for Gabby because I had recorded with her, but I hadn't met her in

But she ended up being really cool. So maybe it's even better that way. Oh, someone asked in Coffee Combos group, anyone else watching Million Dollar Nannies on Hulu, stumbled upon it on a board afternoon and haven't been able to stop since. I'm on day two, still season one. Okay. I got, I have a couple Q&A questions.

And if you guys are sick of hearing about tour, I won't talk about it on here ever again. But one of the questions is what's actually involved in putting a tour like this together that people would never think from the outside. Doing a tour like this costs a lot of money. And I did not know that until this tour. I did not know last tour that it costed what it costed. And so it's interesting because in order to have everything run smoothly,

you have to pay for a tour manager, which, I mean, I guess you don't have to get a tour manager. I obviously didn't have one last time. but this time she this is what she does um so kira i met her for the first time this week live nation kind of put together a couple options for me for a tour manager that gets everything together and then i have to work on the segments so i worked on a bunch of segment ideas and then i work with lissa who typically works for coffee combos now um she so we put together all the the content for each show and in order to make every show different i have to

update and change segments regularly. So I'm working pretty closely with Lissa on that. And then the tour manager is scheduling everything. So she's getting like the advances to the show. So the venue that I'm at knows exactly how the show goes. We have to do sound check. And then sound check. We typically, if my guest is there, I will run through the entire show with them without telling them what's in it. So it's like just like the songs, the music cues, like things like that. And then also like feeding everybody on the crew, hotels, airlines, renting cars, all of those things, getting merch delivered. The first time I did tour, unfortunately, we did not know what we were doing. And so a lot of money was spent where it didn't need to be spent. And so looking back at that

versus now, I have 21 shows versus however money I did then. And I double and triple the venue sizes this time than last time. So actually, what was ordered in merch for the first tour was the amount that was probably three or four times the amount that I needed because we didn't know what, you know, what needed to be done. And so there is a lot of moving parts on the back end. If a show starts at, we'll use Nashville, for example, the Nashville show started at 8 o'clock. We get into the venue around three because Ike and I have to count out every single piece of merch there is. So for a whole number's sake, if we ordered 100 T-shirts, we have to count them in. and then while merch is being sold, however many sells, and then before we leave, we have to count them back out.

And so then we were having an issue because there was no sprinter van available. So the plan was to run a sprinter van to bring all the merch with us to every city. Well, then we ran into a problem where halfway through tour, we could only bring half the merch with us and we had to ship the rest. So we couldn't bring all of our tour merch to the next stop because it had to be shipped, but then it didn't get delivered on time. have to pay for shipping and I think shipping the boxes ends up being like three or four hundred dollars. So you have to think about every time we have to ship merch because it doesn't fit in the van. We're paying for that. We're paying for the crew to eat. We're paying for everybody. We're doing all of the thing and everybody on my crew. And then paying for like the lanyards and putting

together all the packages. Rebecca's daughter actually put together all the VIP packages that have like the little stickers and bookmarks and stuff. She put all of those together. And so just trying to figure all of that out. And then there are so many moving parts. And then it's like, okay, well, if checkout at a hotel is at 11, but I'm, my show isn't until 7 or 8, then it's like, okay, where do I go between 11 and we'll say two or three when I can get into the venues and stuff like that. So when it comes to behind the scenes to answer your question, there is so much that goes into it. And then also considering like paying for late checkout. So hopefully I could pay or hopefully I could check out at two o'clock and then go to the venue by three.

So I'm hanging out in the lobby for an hour or going to find something to do or paying for an extra overnight. Anyways, all that to say, there is a lot of moving parts and I can't even take credit for a lot of it. That's why the tour manager is so important. And I just contract her basically just for the tour dates. And so making sure that I have in some venues, they want their cue music on Apple and some of them on Spotify.

And then as the guests and the segments change, I have to change those and then update the sheets. It's just, it feels like a lot of work, but it just, or I guess it's, it's more money than work, I guess I would say. The work part is the name of the game, right? I'm not complaining about the work because it's just like anybody else's job, right? Like you go to work, you do your job. So that's our job, but it costs a lot of money.

And so before, you know, I make anything that all expenses have to be paid back and the IRS has to be paid and things like that. And so it ends up being more of a labor of love. it does for profit, right? Like I don't make a whole lot of money on tour. It's just for the ways to connect with you guys and to, you know, bring it to life in person, I think. And so, there's just a lot of moving parts of nothing else. How is prepping for a live show different from recording an actual episode in the studio? We don't have to do anything as far as like on set. So when we do the mic check or the sound check, we get to go out and we have everything that we

already have prepared. So on a regular recording, we have a sheet usually that we go off of with topics or documentaries or submissions from you guys. And so I kind of have the same thing for tour, but I also come up with segments as well that have like the shock factor and things like that. And so then for the sound effects like cue music and things like that, we don't have to do that. The venue does that. So they learn how to do all of that during sound check with what songs and and things of that nature. What do your kids think, know about, what do your kids think or know about mom going on tour? Do they understand this is, what this is and what's going on? Um, no, I don't think they do. Maybe Elliott and Lincoln do, but I definitely don't think Lux and Creed do. I do, I have played

with the idea of having them come out on a tour day and I just don't know if there would be a way to make that happen because I do think I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for them, right? Like, in terms of having this podcast and this platform, because it's, it all started with me being pregnant at 17. But I would have to then put them in the green room for afterwards because I think that the rest of the shows are not really safe for work or safe for kids. And so I think Lux and Creed don't fully know what it is. But I definitely think maybe Philly would be a good one, although I probably wouldn't,

I think I don't have Lux and Creed no matter what for any of the tour date. So I wouldn't be able to bring them, but maybe Elliott and Lincoln. Or maybe they can run the merch tables. I don't know. We'll see. Um, okay. What is the worst case scenario you've mentally prepared for just in case? Oh, wait.

Did you rehearse for this or is most of it off the cuff? All of it is off the cuff. So even when I like am bringing stuff out on stage for shock factor and like the games that we're playing and stuff is all like I can't run through that with them at sound check because then it would give away the whole show and then there's no shock value on the guest end. And so I'm winging it, hoping that the segments that we put together, Lissa and I put together are good enough, basically, and we have enough content. What's worst case scenario?

Worst case scenario is nobody buys tickets for that city or like nobody shows up. I know Indiana, crazy enough, Indiana had 11 tornadoes touchdown the night of my show and people were messaging me, DMing me saying, is the show still on? You know, I can't make it because of the weather. 70% of the ticket buyers, like out of 100% of people that bought tickets, 70% still showed up and it still looks really full. So like worst case scenario is nobody shows up, right? Like I feel like that's worst case scenario, but I'm still going to be there even if there's

one person. So then we just maybe go to dinner or something. You know what I mean? Like I feel like that's worst case scenario is a handful of people come. And it's like we could just let the venue run a regular schedule programming and we could just go to dinner. So I think that's a good plan. Okay.

And then last but not least, we have a foul play for this episode. And, okay, it says, I started dating my baby daddy in eighth grade. We were off and on and had our first child at 18. Split for a while and ended up having four kids, three boys, one girl, before I hit 30. He cheated the entire time. I knew, but could never find solid proof until a random account reached out on Facebook, saying she'd been talking to a guy she thought might be my baby daddy. He was lying about his, he was lying about his name to all the girls.

After that, everything started coming out. I found multiple girls and hidden emails talking to them for years. years in different states. Then right after my birthday in 2021, another girl found me on Facebook, and he basically was playing daddy to her little girl who was the same age as our daughter. Driving an hour to see this chick and I had no idea. I'm not sure how he even pulled it off. I had his location and I had his location on and off and he covered his stories really well. The way he cheated is truly mind blowing. I could literally write a book. After all of it, we've, after all of it, we finally had a sit down conversation and he knew I was serious about

leaving with our four kids. He ended up getting a huge portrait of me tattooed a lot. He ended up tatting a huge port. He ended up tatting a huge portrait of me on his arm along with all four kids. I know it sounds crazy and everyone asks me why, but he truly has been a whole new person since 2022. Part of me does believe people can change if they really want to. Um, I do think people can change. I think that sometimes shit goes on. Um, especially in a case like this where you're together since eighth grade, your frontal lobe is not fully developed until your 20s. And I'm not saying that you should have had to go through all of that during that time.

But like we're all so young that we don't fully, I mean at that time, we're all so young that we're not fully thinking about the outcomes and consequences. And I'm not saying that's the case for every single person, especially when you are together since eighth grade on and off. Your frontal lobe is not fully developed. You have no idea what you're doing. Right. And I'm not saying that cheating should be a part of it.

but I also understand that like when you're that young, how can you really decide what the heck you're doing? And I don't know, if you believe that he has changed and you believe that you guys are going to have a better life moving forward and he's changed since 2022, then who the fuck is anybody else to say otherwise, right? Like, I'm not here to judge your situation unless you were asking me, like, would I stay? Right. Like, if you believe that he's changed and you're happy and your family is together and you guys feel solid, then I'm not here to do. judge you guys and to say like he's not changed. I do think when people change they when people want to change they can. I mean, not to compare cheaters to drug addicts, but right, like there are

so many people in recovery every single day that have to fight for it. And I would imagine that when you have somebody who's a chronic cheater and only knows cheating, like that probably would take a lot for them. But also it is it could be possible. I mean, right? Like people do it all the time. I think it just depends what it is going like what is at stake. What do they have to determine, guess, which is the better route for them to take, to continue cheating and not have a stable environment or to change their behavior and have a stable environment and to fight for that every single day, right? Like, I'm not here to tell you anything different. If you trust him, then that's on you and I hope for nothing but success for you and your family. And listen,

sometimes it just takes hitting rock bottom, whether that's drugs and alcohol, cheating, just stupid choices in general. So we've all made. them and I'm not here to judge your journey. So I hope that that helps or gives you some consolation. I don't know. Thank you guys for rocking with me and staying with me for the past four weeks. One more episode before I think that we attempt to restructure everything. And I hope that everyone has an amazing and safe Fourth of July if I'm not back before then because we are running a best of. And thank you so much again for coming to coming out to all my shows. And thank you so much for the reviews. Constructive criticism means a lot to us, even if it's not a five-star review.

And I know that Lindsay will be really appreciative of everyone who's reached out and shown love and support during this hard time for her. So thank you all, and we'll see you next week. Hi there, it's Becca Tobin. I am currently the mother of a four-year-old, which means I have been through it, but I still have questions and maybe even a few answers. From surrogacy to toddler chaos, I have learned a lot and also not nearly enough. That's why I decided to launch Baby Game. A six-part series from the Lady Gang, where I'm getting real about fertility, parenting, and all the stuff nobody actually tells you. I'm bringing in some experts for the tough stuff and some other celebrity moms and friends

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