Coffee Convos with Kail Lowry and Lindsie Chrisley - Returning Carts & Big Personalities
Episode Date: June 20, 2024CC356: Lindsie and Kail have some words for those who don't return their shopping carts to their designated area. A tiktok about police finding human remains on a farm outside a city sparks some inter...est in who this person was that owned the farm. Was this a serial killer that was never caught? A Facebook group post about a mother finding out her daughter lied about a very serious issue sparks the conversation about whether we should believe our children 100% of the time. Kail and Lindsie react to some videos they were tagged in.. Check out our Instagram @coffeeconvospodcast for more! Thank you to our sponsors!Apartments: Visit Apartments.com, a place to find a placeBetter Help: This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/coffee today to get 10% off your first monthHyatt Vivid: Learn more at HyattVividResorts.com and discover limited-time grand opening rates and a free speedboat excursion for twoIQBar: Get 20% off every IQBar product plus free shipping when you text CONVOS to 64-000. By Texting 64000, you agree to receive recurring automated marketing messages from IQBAR. Message and data rates may apply. No purchase required. Terms apply, available at IQBAR.com. Reply "STOP" to stop, "HELP" for helpStamps: Visit Stamps.com and use code COFFEE for a 4-week trial, free postage, and a digital scale!Thrive: Get an exclusive 20% off your first order when you visit thrivecausemetics.com/COFFEE
Transcript
Discussion (0)
I hate gift giving and receiving.
Receiving gifts is so weird.
What do you say thank you?
This is Coffee Convo's with Kale Lowry and Lindsey Chrisley.
I really want you to be in your feels, Kale.
That does not interest me whatsoever.
I feel very attacked by you.
A spirited discussion about motherhood, friendship, family,
and life in the public eye.
I'm just not with the fakery anymore.
There's a fakery bakery around here.
Here's Kale and Lindsey.
Hi, honey. Hi. What are you drinking? Water. Oh, you're a water girly today. Yes. Good morning and welcome back to another
episode of Coffee Combos podcast. I have three drinks today. I have my old cup
that Kristin made us when we first started coffee combos.
Period. Can you believe that I still have this? That's a gem
that is a vintage piece that is going down in history. It is. I
need to ask you, do you ever get cans that look like this? Yes.
Okay, so for those of you who can't see this, it's like a
busted up top of a can.
And if I ever get like a whole case of something
and one of these cans come in,
I always get rid of this first
because I don't want it to look like janky in my fridge.
Oh, like you drink it first.
Yes.
Oh my God, I thought you were like, I just throw it away.
No, I don't throw it away.
So I went to the car wash with like 30 minutes left
of it being open for the day.
And I think I was on the phone with Kristin
and I was like, is this rude or like, is it not rude?
And she was like, no, I think if you showed up
like five minutes before they close, it's rude.
But like 30 minutes, that's enough of a grace period.
Like it's fine.
But then also who do I think I am pulling through Chick-fil-A
at 1034 thinking I'm getting chicken minis? I don't think that's the same as like walking into a restaurant 20 minutes before they close.
You know what I mean? Also, chicken minis are chicken nuggets. They just add the bread.
So they might've put the bread away. I don't think that's like completely unheard of. Also,
I've literally raced, especially when I was pregnant, like raced to Chick-fil-A for chicken
minis. And you just hope that you're like on the cusp of like still serving.
So someone told me a hack for this. If you can't get there at
1030. But you want to place a breakfast order you do it on the
mobile.
Oh, yeah, I think you said that before.
Pull through the mobile line and then you're still going to get
your breakfast. I'm not okay.
Are you?
What? We don't have a mobile line. What?
We don't have a mobile line.
Oh, so our whole Chick-fil-A and most,
I'm pretty sure that the franchise owner,
like around here owns three of them, I think.
They did a whole mobile line.
So if you're a mobile app order,
you have your own lane that you go through.
And then there's the regular lane right beside it.
Well, that's convenient.
And I hate it.
Oh.
Hate it because I am not a mobile app user.
I am very old school.
It's taken a lot for me to even use a digital calendar.
You know that I used to be the girly
that wrote down everything, YouTube,
really hard for me to transition.
Now I don't know what I would do without my digital calendar
because it's so easy just to pull it up.
But I think just being a creature of habit,
I didn't want to change.
I hate using freaking apps.
I hate it.
I do too.
I'm a big fan of McDonald's double cheeseburger
specifically with Mac sauce.
And I was like, I told Kristen, I'm like,
oh, I can justify this.
I'm gonna get the mobile app.
And every single time you can get rewards or whatever,
but every single time I don't do it.
And then I like, the only one that I actively use
all the time is Wawa and Starbucks
because it's just so easy.
I just actually texted, reminded me to text Isaac
to download one of the apps and upload his gift card
because you get like the rewards or whatever.
But I always forget about the apps.
Like I always Chick-fil-A, McDonald's, all of them.
I forget them.
It kind of goes along with being like a bargain shopper.
I don't know how to shop bargains.
And I also just, I feel like the apps are so inconvenient
but they're convenient.
I've just like made myself believe that they're inconvenient.
And so I never get any freaking deals.
Oh, I always get deals at the two that I just need. Like I
just got 15 cents off my gas the other day at Wawa. What other
rewards apps do I have? I don't have any other they close the
movie theater by us because there was like a movie theater
situation but they closed it. Outside the Barnes and Noble
one is not great. So I don't really get any points for that.
Also, we went to go and see a movie the other day. I don't know what type of theaters you'll have near
your house, but we have a movie theater called Movie Tavern, and it has the recliners in there,
which I absolutely love. We just got those Elijah the company that Elijah worked
for literally just did all of the concrete and then they put recliners in and then the trays come
forward which is so freaking nice. It's just upsetting because it's 45 minutes from us. That's
the nearest. Mine's not super close to me either. I drive across town to go to it. But for a reclining situation, I'm going to do that. And also,
any person that has a child that you want to take to the movies
that you want to do like in the evening, I highly recommend
going to a movie theater that has a recliners because I make
Jackson shower and get like in his bedtime stuff. Oh, that's so
smart. And then I take him to the movies
and I feed him dinner there.
So then when we come home,
the only thing we have to do is brush teeth.
That is so smart.
And it's like a wind down.
Yeah, cause you're like in a,
I will say I just took the kids to go see,
If?
If, thank you.
Yeah.
If I took them to see if,
and I did fall asleep the last 20 minutes
because of the recliner,
because ours actually
heat to like you can put Oh, we don't have that option. We have
the seat warmers. I mean, Delaware can only have so much
and I guess seat warmers and our movie theater is one of them.
Listen, um, one of the bloggers that I follow, I absolutely love
her. She's the funniest human and so I mean, I love to follow
somebody that it's just like they're just living life and they don't give a fuck what you think and that's Krista Horton. And they have a blanket company that does basically like barefoot dreams. But I feel like they've kind of perfected it a little bit better. But they have the travel blankets that fold up into a pillow. So they're called a quillo. A quillo. And those
would be perfect. If y'all are looking for a gift, and they
sell out. So like you have to like jump on it whenever they go
live because they're gone.
This still Wharton's company or she posted. Yeah, it's her
company. Her company. Yeah. That's so cool. And so they named it Aquillo
and the blanket folds up into a pillow.
And that would be like the perfect thing
to be able to take to the movies
because bitch, I'd be getting cold in there.
Oh, it's so cold in there.
I always forget.
And I'm like, oh, it'll ruin your whole movie experience
if you're cold in the movie theater.
We got other shit that we've got to talk about.
Specifically, something that got me heated, okay?
Okay.
This was on ABC News, ran across it last night.
If anybody has a differing opinion than me,
I'm probably gonna be pissed off.
This woman says,
"'Judge me all you want, mom sparks debate
about returning shopping cart at grocery store.'
One mom raises eyebrows after posting
a now viral TikTok
video sharing her opinion about why she chose not to return
her shopping cart at a grocery store.
In the video, which is now en masse,
nearly 12 million views since being posted on May 30th,
she says, I'm not returning my shopping cart
and you can judge me all you want to.
I'm not getting my groceries into my car,
getting my children into the car,
and then leaving them in the car to go return the cart.
So if you're gonna give me a dirty look, fuck off.
This viral clip has sparked a debate,
leaving people divided on whether or not
to return your grocery cart to a corral in a parking lot
or leave it in your nearby parking spot.
I'm gonna pause right there.
I feel like you're gonna have a different opinion than me.
Really? I thought we'd be aligned. Okay, let's hear it. Let's hear it. I'm going to right there. I feel like you're gonna have a different opinion than me. Really? I thought we'd be aligned.
Okay, let's hear it.
Let's hear it.
I'm going to return the cart.
I'm also gonna return the cart.
Okay, so we agree on that.
We're aligned.
Listen to me, there are so many other fucking solutions here.
When I saw this, when I originally saw this,
I was- I didn't know that you had seen this.
Oh, I was outraged when I had seen this.
Yeah, I actually saw a TikTok. I didn't read the article. I was scrolling on TikTok and had seen this. Oh, I was outraged when I had seen this. Yeah, I actually saw a tick tock. I
didn't read the article. I had I was scrolling on tick tock and
someone was reacting to this right. So my first thought was,
my kids are going to be okay for the 30 second walk to the god
damn cart return, right. The other option is, your kids help
you unload. I mean, if they're babies that you can't really
help that right. So they can help you unload and then help walk to the cart return and then walk back if that's
if you're that upset about it. Some cars have automatic start. Mine specifically has automatic
start where the if it's hot out, the air condition automatically goes on with it. If my kids
are small, like for example, Rio, I'm either gonna put load up the car and then put them
on my hip and walk over. I'm gonna put load up the car and then put them on my
hip and walk over, I'm gonna put them in the car. My kid will be fine for 45
seconds or less for me to return. The other option is if it's possible you can
park right next to the cart return. The other option is if you cannot for
whatever reason cannot return your cart, put it in a safe place that it's not
going to roll into other people's cars.
So if you for whatever fucking reason cannot return it, put it up on like the wheels, like
the back wheels and like make sure it's secure up on the like grass. Like sometimes there's like a
curb. I don't know, like maybe for you have infants, like little itty bitty infants. However, that being
said, and I don't think Elijah
would be upset if I said this, if I put the twins who are seven months old in a car that is running
with air conditioner and I have the keys, I don't think he's going to be upset if I walk to the cart
return without them. I 100% agree with everything that you're saying. Is it scary to leave your
children in the car alone for any amount of time? Absolutely, yes it is.
However, at the point that you're leaving a shopping cart
in a parking spot that somebody could park in
that is a customer of this grocery store,
you're disrupting the entire process of how things run
for all consumers.
You would be upset if you came into a parking lot,
go to this grocery store, and all of these,
if everybody did that and had that same mentality,
every parking spot would be full of shopping carts.
So then you'd have to leave your kids in the car
to get out of the car, to move the cart or carts
in a parking spot to be able to park there. So it's kind of not, what is it?
Ironic? An oxymoron? I don't even know, but you'd have to get out of the car and leave your kids in
the car. Or here's another idea. If you have a partner or if you have a babysitter, you could
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Another option would be if you don't want to do
what should be done by returning the cart,
you could just simply pay whatever the fee is
to have them bring the groceries out to your car,
and then you wouldn't have a cart
in the beginning.
Period.
That's a whole other option that I never even thought about.
You could do car pickups, car pickup groceries
or Instacart.
And then you wouldn't be leaving your kids at all,
but it is my opinion that if you come out
of the grocery store, let's just do a play by play.
You're coming out of the grocery store
and you have all these children.
Me, I'm going to start the car first
and make Jackson get buckled in the back seat.
And then I'm going to load my groceries into the car.
And then I'm going to return the cart.
He is securely in a seat with a seatbelt on.
The 45 seconds,
and even if we're talking about younger children,
if they are securely in their
car seat, they can't get out to do anything. So that shouldn't be an issue altogether.
I also want to say, I don't know if this is the case at all grocery stores, but all of our publics
around here, that chain, they hire a lot of children with disabilities for like their first job, some people are even older with disabilities, and they
will be the people who go out and grab the carts and stuff.
That's foul to put your shopping cart where they can't go to one
place and pick them up and bring them back into the grocery
store.
Agreed. I agree with that. I agree with that. It's also
dangerous because those carts are rolling around in the parking
lots. And you have I mean, you run the risk of them running
into another car. But you also to your point, like if someone
is special needs and has to go run around the parking lot
chasing these cars, it just leaves more, more room for
error, more room for harm.
I just don't agree with it.
I can't, I mean, let's go on the bigger scale of things.
If it takes you two minutes, I'm still,
and maybe people don't wanna admit that,
but I will leave my kids in the car for two minutes
to go put the car back.
I mean, I'm not gonna do that to run into the gas station
because I feel like that's like a different story. But to return a cart, be
a fucking good human and be a good citizen. I don't care.
So a California based clinical and forensic psychologist told Good Morning America that
she made the video with the intent to raise awareness of moms and children being unaware
of their surroundings. She noted that she decided to film the video after hearing about
the debate on the radio and based
and based her conversations that she's had on her field. She said
I wanted to make the video to empower people to say trust your
instinct. It's okay if you don't feel safe to return your
shopping cart.
No, she didn't say any of that. She didn't say. Well, let me not
say she didn't do that. I saw the video that I saw was her
saying that she's not doing it and you could
fuck off. She didn't start the video from what I saw saying, moms, when you are putting
your kids in your car and returning shopping carts, be aware of your surroundings. Like
I think that that would have been a different conversation if that's how it would have been
started. Right? Like we've had the conversation about people approaching me.
And one of my girlfriends said that if she sees someone
in her peripherals while she's buckling her kids
in their car seats, she will start screaming,
do not come near me.
Do not come near me.
I have my children and she'll make a sat like she'll make
like a scene so that other people are kind of,
it's alerting to them and getting their attention.
So I do think being aware of your surroundings,
being aware of your surroundings
is a different conversation
than just not being a good human being
and putting the cart back, right?
Like those are two different combos.
So this quote says,
people who do not return their shopping cart
are benefiting from everybody else doing the nice thing,
which is returning their cart,
because if nobody returns the carts,
then it would be chaos in the parking lot,
which is what I just said.
And so I think that's also why this resonates is sort of like, I'm doing this nice thing
and you're not doing your part.
I agree.
I agree with that wholeheartedly.
If you can't do your part just in society and your kids being in the car is preventing you from being able to do that,
then you need to come up with an alternative plan to not disrupt the way that the grocery store
and the parking and the carts work all together. All I'm going to say on that, I would love to know
if you guys agree or disagree. If you disagree, don't really give a fuck because I don't agree
with you. But wait, did you see the original video or no,
I never saw the original video.
Okay. All right. So we'll have to circle back and see if she
addressed that or if it's all the way at the end because the
other thing too is like, obviously we have this reaction
to things if she didn't mention the safety until the end if
that's what you if that was your intention, hook them with that
from the beginning, the first couple seconds should be about awareness.
I just saw this in the news and I was like, absolutely fuck not.
No, I think that was like an I don't know for sure. I'm talking out of my ass. I want
you to watch this TikTok and react to it in real time.
Okay.
10,000 human remains were found on a farm outside of Indianapolis and authorities are still identifying victims.
But let's get into the story.
This is Herb Baumeister, the suspect.
Herb moved his wife and three sons into this farm
outside of Indianapolis in 1988.
Authorities believe for nearly a decade,
Herb was using his farm to dispose of human remains
that he had unalived.
The remains, according to authorities, were all young men, mostly gay men,
very reminiscent of John Rangacy. His family, as is the case for most serial killers,
were not suspecting that Herb was doing anything until one day, one of his sons
found a human skull on the property
and brought it to his wife.
They called the police.
The police wanted to do some investigation on the property,
but his wife refused.
But once she began to see the evidence
piling up against him, she divorced him.
Before Herb could be apprehended,
he fled to Canada in 1996,
where he then unalived
himself with a shotgun.
He left a note, but he never admitted to anything.
He never confessed.
So it's been nearly 30 years that authorities have been investigating this property and
going through all of the remains.
They believe and suspect that he is guilty of unaliving at least 25 people. Now the human body has
206 bones in it. In doing the math, there's approximately, possibly around 48 bodies on
his property. This location is about three hours south of where John Wayne Gacy disposed
of his bodies in his crawlspace in near Kirkwood, Illinois,
Dislaines, Illinois.
And it's about four hours south from where Jeffrey Dahmer did his crimes.
Let me know if you want me to do a breakdown of Herb, if I can find a lot of information
about him and his biopsychosocial history and see how he fits into this serial killer
profile.
So, yes, I need to contact her because I want her to do that.
Yeah. But how do we feel knowing that there is another serial killer that is almost to the same,
I don't want to call it notoriety, but level as John Wayne Casey and Jeffrey Dahmer? I mean,
the math isn't mapping, right? So if they are thinking that it's around 25 bodies and it's actually more like 40 something
bodies, what the fuck?
Okay.
I have a lot of questions about this.
I don't understand how, if you are married and you have children, it is more likely that
you could do a crime as a single person and get away with stuff if
you don't have people like watching over you or living in the same home that you
live in, right? But the fact that he was married and was able to get away
with this scares me even more. Well that was like BTK. BTK was married with
children and they never suspected it. He was going on boy scout trips with his son
and leaving in the middle of the night to go kill people.
John Wayne Gacy killed 33 people and Jeffery-
How do you kill so many people and you don't get caught?
Because if I had to guess, you don't get caught
because I think, well, John Wayne Gacy was also boys.
It was also males.
And then this one was also, a lot of them were males.
So I would be, I'm not sure what the ratio is
to like female sex workers and the homeless population
or missing people population is for women versus men.
So that's a really interesting point.
I don't know what, I don't know,
because I feel like women go missing more often because
of sex working and things like that, prostitution.
But how would they identify that these men that were found on that property identified
as gay?
Maybe they'd filed missing persons reports and the families told them.
Maybe they were known in the community if some of them were not homeless or sex workers. This episode is brought to you by IQ bar.
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Also, I just looked it up.
So John Wayne Gacy killed 33 young males
and Jeffrey Dahmer killed 17.
That means that this one,
this most recent serial killer surpasses both of those.
Which is-
That's absolutely terrifying.
And can you imagine living with someone,
being married to that person,
having a child with that person,
and then finding out this type of information
that truly tells you that you don't know
about fucking people?
You don't.
And you know what's even scarier is knowing
that you have three children who could potentially
carry the same mental illnesses or the same tendencies or have children that could because it's a nature versus nurture,
right? Like, I don't think that people are necessarily born evil, but I do think that
you can have some genetic characteristics that would lead you to be, you know, there was a conversation I had with
a therapist and he said that like, white males are more likely to be a serial killer versus
like a Hispanic or black male or same for women, you know, so knowing that alone, plus
you have a component of a family member was a serial killer or had these mental
illnesses that led him to do stuff like this. That's terrifying too. It's like, how do you
choose to procreate if you know that someone in your family of direct, your parent or grandparent
was a serial killer? Do you choose to have children knowing that? I don't even know.
If you have whatever mental illness would be associated with this, I don't even know. I think if you if you have like whatever mental illness would be like associated with this, I don't think that that person would be
forward thinking enough to care if somebody else was going to follow in
their footsteps to do that kind of stuff. You couldn't be thinking or
maybe it maybe serial killers are like extreme over thinkers.
A lot of them are.
Because how do you get away? I mean ten thousand. What did it say ten thousand?
Bones are our body parts for morning parts
How could you have ten thousand body parts on land with a wife living like what was she doing and was he?
I never heard of him. That was the man
Bisexual man or something? Is that why?
Well, that was my other thought was maybe he had impulses that were not necessarily
something that he ever wanted to acknowledge.
And that's what, I don't know because-
I mean, not that it justifies anything.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
But it was-
But it's very interesting that you would target like a specific, I mean, I guess all serial
killers kind of do it.
They target specific, you know, like college girls or, you know, whatever it is.
Boys or who was the serial killer?
Was it Ed Gain that was attacking women who resembled his mom or like brought up feelings
from it?
I don't know if that's who it was.
No, it was that big man who had those.
Oh, you're talking about, okay, Ed Gain was the butcher.
Okay, he raped a grave robber.
A grave robber?
One of, who was it?
Was it?
Ed Kemper.
Ed Kemper, no, but was he the one
that was like doing his mom?
Like finding ones that resembled his mom?
I saw one of them.
No, I think it was Ed Gein, specifically who I'm thinking of.
I'm pretty sure was...
Hold on.
Let me just do this quick search.
I mean, I don't want to sound like completely insensitive, but I don't know how your brain
gets to the point.
Yes, it was Ed Gein.
He shot both women who resembled his late mother.
He admitted to digging up numerous corpses in order to cut off body parts,
practice necrophilia and fashion masks and suits
out of skin to wear around his home.
So yes, it was him.
Okay, but like, how do you get to the point
of like so mentally ill
that you follow through with this kind of stuff?
It's not like a thought,
it's a complete follow through with a kind of stuff. It's not like a thought, it's a complete follow through
with a plan and a cover up.
I wonder if they like plan their first one
or if it's like an impulse and then they freak out.
Because I think in order to be a serial killer,
you have to have, like Jeffrey Dahmer
didn't get caught for a long time.
A long time.
And same for John Wayne Gacy.
I'm not super familiar with John Wayne Gacy's murders,
but Ed Kemper, I read a book, I listened to a podcast, I've seen documentaries on him. That,
I don't know. I really don't know. It's honestly sickening. So wait, can we follow this story?
Is this new? Yeah. That article was written, when this airs it will well this so
We were we are recording right now four days after that article was posted. So that article
Maybe the ten thousand body parts is probably new information to the case, which I had never heard of the case
So me it's just now getting more attention because of social media, but I don't necessarily think that the case itself is new.
That's so interesting.
Um, okay.
I have to tell you, this was posted in our group and I immediately screenshot it and I was like, I have to talk to Kale about this.
This person posts in our Facebook group and says, today, I found out my seven year old daughter really did lie about my husband's other girlfriend as revenge for being grounded. And that he never
cheated on me at all. We're well into our divorce proceedings,
and he won't forgive me for not believing him when he denied it.
Ma'am the way I would riot.
Okay, but here's the thing. I have a couple issues with this
right? Like, Lux is about to be seven. okay? He's gonna be seven this summer. What concrete evidence would he have
to Elijah having another girlfriend?
He doesn't have a phone.
He doesn't have, what would he have?
Kale, that is logic talking.
No, because if Lux came up to me and said,
"'Elijah has another girlfriend, I saw her or
say they went to the store or something and then he told me that, I would be like, there's
just no way.
Like there's just, yes, I believe my kids, but certain things you have to take with a
grain of salt.
And also, if a seven-year-old is going to those types of extremes, there's something
wrong.
Oh, there's definitely something wrong.
And for them to even know at seven,
really necessarily what cheating is,
I don't think Jackson would have had enough knowledge
at that age to identify what that was,
even if it was going on and he saw it.
I don't think so. But for a child to be grounded
and to make something like that up.
That has to be satire. There's no fucking way in hell that this
can be real. Lux. You're that's such a good point. Lux has no
idea what cheating is. No idea. I did make a comment about
someone being like good looking and Lincoln who's 10 was like,
Oh, so you're cheating on Elijah, because I said someone was cute. You know what I mean? So there's just no way that my seven year
old would be that aware. Also, I've never grounded my seven year old because a seven
year old, in my opinion, my let me let me let me back up. My seven year old would not
be able to process or understand what a grounding was. Like he's just not there.
Maybe if it was Isaac when he was younger,
maybe he would have understood,
but like grounding a seven year old just seems like,
what does that mean?
Jackson never got grounded until this school year
and he's in fourth grade.
And by grounded, that's just like taking away technology
or something, you know?
Right, right, right, right.
They're not really, it's not like they're out driving cars
or like really going places without you necessarily.
So what exactly was the seven-year-old grounded for,
number one, and how extreme was this grounding
for them to come up with a lie that the dad cheated
on the mom and now they're in divorce proceedings
and now it's all a lie.
This has to be such, because there's a lot to unpack here.
And this is a situation where I'm kind of judging the whole situation without context,
because I need to know what type of parents these are.
I need to know what therapies might be needed for the child because what are they doing
to be grounded?
Clearly they're not okay. I will tell you a story that happened when I was probably,
I would say I was six when this happened.
And I'm not gonna say which parent that this was against,
but one of my parents was giving me a bath
and they had already split.
So I was in one of my parents' home,
other parent had dropped me off.
This parent asked me what I had been doing
and where I'd been all day.
And I said where we had been and who we had been with.
And that's how my one parent became aware
of the other parent having an affair.
Oh, an affair?
From giving me a bath, because I said
that we went to a waffle house and what was
Toys R Us back then and who we went with but the other parent dropped you off. I know
But they they had been having issues and I don't know if they had really identified
What exactly was going on with the issues or like what the actual issues were and why they were existing?
But there was no confirmed situation of this affair until I said that.
So that's concerning.
I think that was probably how people did affairs back then when there wasn't social media.
Right?
But that was sloppy.
That was very sloppy.
I need a text in the Elijah's face right now.
He literally was like, he literally was
like, wait, what? What? Um, and then from that point, there was a PI that was, that
was hired and photos that were taken. What? Yeah. And she said, I want the tea. I'll tell
you. So, so from that bathtub incident,
then there was a private investigator that was hired
and there were photos taken to basically
corroborate the story that I had told.
And yeah.
So I say all of that to say I was six,
but I didn't know what I was telling.
That's what I'm saying.
That's what I was, I remember. So I've
been in a naked family, right? Like my mom was a naked mom and
you know, her ex husband was a naked dad. And he was leaving my
dad anyway, long story short, my mom got in a new relationship.
And I was telling my cousin about him being naked, right? And
I didn't think anything of it because it was just like a
normal thing. And even though it was a whole new relationship,
he told my mom and then my mom,
and we had a fucking come to Jesus meeting,
but it was just like, I didn't know what I was saying.
That was normal to me, right?
Like, we don't know what we're saying at that age.
That was probably around, I mean,
I was probably even a little older, like maybe like eight.
So six and seven, I just think,
you don't really know what cheating is.
You just tell the story.
But I will say say that being said,
at that age, again, you have to take what they say
with a grain of salt
because it's all about perspective, right?
Like you're telling it from your perspective
that meant nothing,
but if maybe another child said it from their perspective,
it might've been really upsetting for them, you know?
So I think it just depends.
Like you just never know with kids that age,
especially with like maturity and everything else.
And even at kids really, you have to be very careful.
And I don't say not to believe your kids,
do believe your kids.
Absolutely.
If you ever get in a situation
where you don't believe your kid,
and then it comes out to be true of what they're saying,
then you don't want to have to carry the guilt with you for not believing them.
So I'm not saying don't trust your kids, but also fact check.
If something seems like a little bit off, maybe go to the other party that it involves
and get some clarity because this happened with Will and I not too long ago
with the situation with Jackson because his perception of time was completely off.
Right, right. Absolutely. Perception of time length like
one time when I went to for example, I went to Alabama
right for 24 hours. Why when I came back? Why did luck say I
was gone for five days?
Exactly. That is that is my point like or they'll be like,
oh, well, I mean, it probably like happened like
last month. And it's really like last year. Creed says last year
all the time. Last year we went to and I'm like, Creed, that was
literally yesterday. Two days ago, because they don't they
truly don't have a real grasp of time. It's not like they're
looking at a calendar every single day and being like they
don't. Most of the time these kids out here don't even know what day of
the week it is.
I think Lux still struggles with he's like, so I go to my dad's and, and then he'll like
struggle with Yeah, no. So you have to listen to what they're saying, but you have to thoroughly
investigate you know what I mean? Like you have to just circle back.
Coffee Compass podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp. I don't know if anybody else
is paying attention to how quickly this year is flying by. And I kind of wanted
to take some time just to ask everybody, what is something that you are proud of
accomplishing in the first six months? What is something you want to still
accomplish? Let's get our goals out there. Let's tell people so we can cheer
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growth and things like that. And that is absolutely where therapy comes into play. Cannot recommend
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Okay, so a listener wrote to us and said, would you ever put your daughter, and I am
saying daughter specifically, because I only have daughters, but you can answer if you
have sons.
Would you ever put her in an Uber under 16 or 18 if you need to get her home from say
sports practice game event or anything really
I would never but one of my daughter's friends apparently her mom had been putting her in uber
since she was 11 they are 13 14 now I could or would never do this if you have the money to put
your child in a car with a stranger then you can offer a teammate's parent gas money to take them home.
Because if I find out that someone from Lincoln's basketball team has been taking Ubers, I would
reach out myself if I found that out and I would say, Hey, let me do this for you because
I don't I would never one want the parent to feel like that is their only option to
make a sport work. And two,
that mother, those parents would never be able to live with themselves if something happened.
So no, I would not allow that. I, Isaac is about to be 15. He's well, he's 14 and a half.
And I wouldn't put him in an Uber. I don't even like putting Jackson in an Uber if we travel somewhere and then have to get
Uber from the airport.
I don't even necessarily like that.
It's like people will know that that's your child.
And for most parents or most guardians, that's a weak point, right?
Even in the book that I was just reading, it was about like Nazi Germany and things like that. And the SS officer that went to go live with this French family was raping the woman.
Right.
And he realized how to torture her based on her children, because he knew that she cared
about them to such a, like with such, you just love your children.
Right. And so that's how he was like torturing her.
And so to me, it's like you go out in public and you go out and put
yourself in an unsafe situation or like go to a maybe like a not great.
Um, area or country or something like that.
And they know that's your weak spot.
So no, I don't, I don't feel comfortable with that.
And I think that people, you know, when you're in a pinch, because I was just having the
conversation with my nanny this morning on my way from drop dropping Jackson off.
She said, you have been running, running, running.
And I said, I know the saying that, you know, we hear all the time, it takes a village to
raise a child.
It does take a village.
But when you don't have one, you have to do it on your own. So I do know that
people who don't have family or people who have friends that are living in a different
life phase, like a lot of my girlfriends have lots of younger children that are younger
than Jackson, so we're not doing the same stuff. So I think people just look for whatever
options that are out there that they can get their hands on.
And so this person wants their child to play sports.
So they're like, okay, well, I'll pay for the Uber to get the child to and from the
sport so they don't have to miss out.
But I think you have to look at the bigger picture of this of how many things could possibly
go wrong.
I also want to say that maybe because I went to two different high schools, like, because
I moved around a lot, one of my high schools was sort of more centrally located, so there would have been more resources to get to sports.
Also after school was an option to stay after school for whatever reason and then go to
sports from there. So you're actually never leaving the school premises from the time
that school gets out until five or five thirty, whatever it was. The second high school that I went to and where I'm located now, the distance
that it is from school to pretty much anywhere else is so far that there aren't really resources.
There's nothing to do in between. So it's not like you could just go to McDonald's,
for example. At my first high school, there was a McDonald's kind of nearby.
So like worst case, you could go hang out at McDonald's, get something to eat, and then
go back to the school for sports.
Here you can't.
Like there's just no way.
I mean, it's a 25 minute drive almost to pretty much anywhere around here.
So there's not a lot of resources.
That sucks.
But at the point that you don't want your kid to miss out, it's like, you can pay for the Uber. So offer
another parent the money, the gas money if you need to.
I just, to me, putting my child in the car with a stranger,
while I understand you're getting that person's
information, and it would be harder for them to do anything,
you, you just never know, and you can't bank on that.
And so I would never trust to put my child in an Uber.
And I agree, I think, maybe reaching out to the team.
I know I have heard from friends who coach
in the high schools around here.
It's not an option to where coaches
can like offer rides and stuff.
Yeah, I think-
Like that's not a thing.
It's definitely a weird,
it's definitely a weird situation here too.
I actually just had a conversation with Creed
about asking, so Creed's best friend
on his baseball team is a girl
and it's one of my best friend's kids.
And I said, I already told him and he's three years old,
I've already said, you have to ask her if you can hug her and you have to ask her to hold her hand.
Like we've already had those conversations. I don't want anything like I want to be big
on consent. I want to be big on all of those things. And I, you know, unfortunately it's
hard because now it's more in my, in my experience, it's like I'm friends with the person who taught Lincoln in kindergarten, right? Like, so the
lines get blurred, where I feel feel like when we were growing
up seeing teachers and coaches outside of that setting, it was
very different. And it was like, what did Mean Girls say? It's
like seeing a dog on hind legs. Like it was like, so it's I
don't know. I mean, I would trust like the gym teacher here.
My kids go to school, I love like, I don't know him super well. But like trust like the gym teacher here. My kids go to school. I love like,
I don't know him super well. But like, I know his wife from wrestling and things like that. And
I would trust him. But that's because I kind of know him. But if I don't, then I wouldn't,
you know what I mean? I mean, I just think the coaches should just be the coaches and never the
ride. I think that there's too many blurred lines. It's not safe for the
coaches in this day and time, and it's also not safe for the children.
Yeah. I would say almost more so in terms of public opinion and the investigations and
things.
If I was a coach, I would be like, I ain't giving nobody a ride.
No, I'm good. I don't want to even touch that. I remember like when Javi and I were running like the sports camps and things like that,
or flag football, like I told Javi,
I said, you need to be careful giving people rides
because people will get the wrong idea real quick.
And it sucks because you want to help
and you want to understand other people's scenarios
and situations, but at the same time,
you don't want anything.
I told Isaac, right?
Like he had told me a situation where he was
put in a position to babysit, potentially going to babysit another person's child with
another family member, right? Like a family member of his with another, with a friend's child.
He was upset because he got woken up. They woke him up to do this, right?
And so naturally like I'm his mom, right? So I'm like, Oh, you know, that sucks. Like, you're a teenager, you should be
able to get to sleep in, right? So I'm telling my friend about
it. And she's like, kill. She's like, that's not the problem
here. The problem is, and I was like, Oh, wow. Like, so when he
got home, I said, if anyone ever asks you to babysit anyone other
than your siblings, like your sister, any of your brothers,
whatever, you say no, you're not comfortable with that. And you can call my mom,
because all it takes is one fucking falling out with
somebody for them to say, Oh, so and so touched my kid or so and
so's. My daughter said or my son said no, you're not don't
fucking play with me. Don't even put yourself in that situation.
If you are, you're not CPR certified, you're not a
babysitter, you have no credentials, you don not a babysitter, you have no credentials,
you don't fucking like kids, you have no,
you have no bullshits.
You have zero business, zero business
watching somebody else's kid.
No, thank you.
I told Isaac, call me.
Call me.
Okay, we have a couple of things that we were tagged in,
so I wanna get to those.
There's so many tags and I have received so many
on my own personal Instagram page and tick-tock of saying that this child is a mini Todd Chrisley and
I want to see what you think. I've seen this I've been tagged in this and I fucking crack up every fucking time the kids
All of his videos are so funny
I don't think he went to school nowhere. If he went to school he didn't learn
anything. That's how he made a two. You want to see how he made a two? This is how he made a two.
I had a draw a two over the top for me and I showed him what a two looks like. I'm gonna
keep a big old two right here in this book.
A big old two so he can remember what a two looks like.
A big old two.
Two of them.
You better realize who feed you.
Where did he go to school?
I don't know.
If he went to school all he did is play.
He didn't learn nothing.
I did do a lot of play in school
You didn't listen your teachers. Did you? Yeah
I did. I think I just played a lot today
I think you're telling stories
I played a lot ask my teachers. I'm a singer at church
I'll see you at church
I'll see you at church. I'll see you at church.
I need, I need Todd to react to that.
I absolutely need him to react.
Literally the amount of times I had been tagged in this little boy's video saying that it
is a mini my dad.
I holler that little boy is so cute and I wish that he belonged to me.
Wait, have Nanny react to it because I want to know if that's how Todd was as a child.
We should have her react to some of those videos.
That would be so hilarious for her to do that.
If I had that child, I would be no good because I would just follow him around videoing him
all day long.
All day long.
And he's like a mini adult.
And he knows he's cute. I know. And he
is just so precious. But he has a sister that are that's in some
of his videos, I think sometimes. And I was just
wondering, wouldn't it be hard to have a child with that big of
a personality and then another child that doesn't have as that
is so funny that you brought that up
because I literally thought about that the other day,
right? Like, it kind of goes back to our conversation about
favorites. And I only say that because the one that has the
bigger personality comes off to other people, I think, as the
favorite where when it was Isaac and Lincoln, Isaac has a big
personality in such a different way than Lincoln, right. So when
I was posting Lincoln all the time, it's because he was such a funny fucking toddler.
He was so funny.
And then we had Lux, and then that personality was even bigger, right?
Yeah.
It's just bigger than life.
Lux's personality is probably, I don't want to say he has the most personality.
He just has the, I don't even know how to describe it, but-
He has the loudest personality.
The loudest. Lux has the loudest personality out of all seven of my kids right now. He's not the
favorite. He just has the loudest personality. So I would guess that people, like families sort of
like, maybe like the Spears family, right? Like Britney Spears had the biggest personality, the most entertaining personality for consumers.
So that's probably why she got more opportunities than Jamie Lynn Spears.
And I only say that because Jamie Lynn had also done acting and singing.
So she obviously had talent, but maybe it just wasn't there the same way that Britney's
was and that she excelled in other things. Isaac is happy, you know, doing
his little content creating now, but his main focus is ASL where
Lux literally wants to be in movies. So if I post him all the
time, so I think it would be the same for this little kid. It's
not that they love the little girl or more or less. It's just
that it's different. Yeah, I just, I can't relate because I
only have the one, you know, so I just don't know
what that would be like, but I do feel like that would be so hard. That would present
its own challenges.
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But I have to ask you this question
because people laugh in my life
about the way I say some words.
If I'm gonna put something red.
Can I list out the words that you say funny?
Yeah.
Dearing.
Dearing.
Tournament. Tournament. When you
say ask past tense, but you still use ask. Yeah, I do that all the time. You also say,
those are the three off the top of my head. I'm trying to think of other words. Go ahead.
Okay. Well, these two came up yesterday. If I'm gonna put, it's the red thing that you could argue it's a fruit or a vegetable on a sandwich.
Tomato.
Tomato. Like I want a tomato sandwich.
Like I missed the O and it's like an A at the end. I don't know how that happens.
Okay, here's another one.
Someone asked me what color my toenails were.
And I said, say the word T-E-A-L.
Teal.
Teal. Say oil. oh no get out get out
just get out get out Kristen said especially oh you also say especially
instead of especially do you say espresso or espresso espresso okay so I
guess I just I don't know,
I make my, I have my own dictionary of words that I use.
No, your dearing is, you're the only,
like I've heard all and tomato,
I've heard those before, like from other people.
I have never in my 32 years
heard someone say dearing for during.
I just feel like it's so much harder
to do it the other way.
That is original and exclusive to Lindsey Chrisley. But till. Till I wonder how
Leah from Teen Mom says it because she calls me Kel. So I'm curious to see if she also says
yeah, does she also say tell for tail? It's just so it's so interesting. And when I was
watching little Jack, it made me think of the words that he was
saying. And I'm like, I can't talk either. So I can't really
make fun of anybody.
I always fascinates me when the same exact family, some of them
will have accents and some don't write like, yeah. Um, they're
just heavier or or people
lose them or whatever. But I love like every time I go to the
south, I hope to come back with some sort of accent like I truly
believe that my mom should have just sent me to live with my
dad's family in Texas, because then I would have all of the
things that I do not feel like Texas accents are the same as
like a Georgia or South Carolina or Alabama. No, no, they're not. They're not. No. And another thing that
is is true. If you are from the south, if you're around your family, I feel like the
accents come out way more than if you're not. I think yeah, I could see that. I could see
that. Or like if you moved somewhere and you lost a little I think, yeah, I could see that. I could see that.
Or like if you moved somewhere
and you lost a little bit of your accent
and then you go back home,
it comes, yeah, because I don't know.
That's so weird.
Okay, the last thing that we were tagged in
is someone found someone's husband on Tinder
and I can't wait to watch this. I found someone's husband on Tinder and I can't wait to watch this.
I found someone's husband on Tinder and I don't know what to do.
And when I say I found him, he actually found me because this dumbass sent me a like knowing
that I know him and I know his wife.
I don't know either of them super well.
I actually don't know the last time I saw either of them.
So we're not tight, close knit friends.
Um, but now I feel like I'm in this moral dilemma where I, I don't know if I should
just leave alone and pretend I never saw anything, um, or doing just follow
girl code and let her know, but that could get really messy.
Um, so what do I do?
There's no such thing as girl code these days, right? Like,
just live by your moral compass, your values and your integrity.
And that's it. Like, just mind your own business, because it's
not going to do anything good for you.
I think at the point that she said, I basically know of them, but I don't know them like that.
I think that was her exit not to do anything.
However, girl code more to me would be less disturbing like what's going on in their personal
life because you don't know them well enough to like disturb their life like that.
But possibly sending him a message and saying, Hey, I find it interesting that you're on Tinder
when you're married.
Kind of call him out and then exit the room.
I would have just been like, yeah, I mean, I guess,
but even still, like even that is just like,
not my monkeys, not my circus.
What is that saying?
I don't even know.
Yeah, but you're trying to involve me
when you start liking me on Tinder.
Because, well, even still-
You're trying to involve me into something.
I don't want to be involved in any way, shape, or form.
So at the point that you like my stuff on,
like, I have seen firsthand this one guy
that I know sort of around here.
I thought he was single, right?
So like when I was single and he was liking all my stuff,
I didn't think anything of it because I thought he was single. Lo and behold, he's very much
not single and has a living girlfriend. So I, oh wow. Yeah. And like, so I'm not going
to entertain that, but I'm also, it's not my business. What you, what goes on in your
relationship, what you do and what he does has nothing to do with me. And as long as
I'm not reciprocating or even paying any mind, I'm not I'm not touching it. I'm not fucking
touching it.
Hmm. And on that note, foul play. Hi, ladies. Love your
podcast. I listen every week. I wanted to share a story as a
follow up from the episode foul play about the urethra and
sneezing on the toilet. Oh, Lord. I don't remember that one. I
remember it. My cousin was eight
months pregnant with her third baby. She was cleaning her house nesting and went to squat
down to clean the baseboard and she felt a tear in her vagina and a bunch of pain. She
could not get back up and end up crawling to the living room and laid down on the rug.
She actually ended up pulling her you. Oh my god. Pulling her you read for when she
told us we all laughed and said,
we all know you just got too freaky in the bedroom.
But nope, she actually pulled her urethra
from cleaning a baseboard.
So PSA to all ladies, it can happen
and don't clean baseboards eight months pregnant.
First of all, if a man lets you clean a baseboard
while you're eight months pregnant, we're firing him.
We're getting rid of him.
He's done.
He is fired.
See, we can't just assume that he's letting her do that
because that would be something in a nesting phase
when you're pregnant.
I mean, you might be cleaning the tops of cabinets off.
Like you might be climbing all these places because I did.
Yeah, well, you shouldn't.
But I didn't tear my urethra.
Well, now we know that you can,
I didn't even know that could happen.
I didn't either.
No, I had no idea.
Like, how much crouch down was she that she was doing this?
Think about bending down to do it.
But I just feel bad because why did she think that was okay when she was like, why?
I feel so bad.
You want to do some crazy nesting stuff?
No, because yes, but no, because I have my my executive dysfunction is so bad.
But I just can't I truly can't function. Kill, I can't even tell you it was so long ago whenever
I was nesting. But when I tell you there were things that I was doing that absolutely did
not need to be done. Don't know why I thought that they needed to be done with sleep over
them not being done. baseboards were definitely on there.
Second foul play.
This person says, Hi, Kayl and Lindsey, I have a foul play for y'all and I'm already
cracking up just from the memory resurfacing.
Me and my shitty ex boyfriend, not a shitty ex boyfriend, were having middle of the day
sex in his room because he still lived with his parents.
We were on the floor so they didn't hear the bed cracking.
He was laying flat on his back and I was on top
standing on my feet just doing really deep squats.
If you know, ooh, if you know what I mean.
She got them thumb to thighs that hold on to
because mine don't hold on mine give out for me.
Mine just get off right under me.
At one point I stood up a little too far
and his dick slipped out of me
at the same time he was coming.
His dick flung up and he got his calm all out of me at the same time he was coming.
His dick flung up and he got his cum all over his face.
We both thought it was pretty funny and started laughing.
I started laughing too hard and started to pee.
I fully emptied my bladder all over his dick and stomach.
He ended up being an absolute shit bag and cheated on me for the majority of our two
and a half year relationship.
So looking back, so glad that he not only gave himself a cum shot, but I peed all over him. I love you both. Love listening to all the podcasts.
That sounds like, um, like-
Same like a you situation.
Yeah. Oh, that would for sure happen to me. Um, also that sounded like, um, like a prequel to
the karma, right? Like, I love that. I love that for her. I love that she got that revenge before
it was actually revenge.
I just have to ask this question. If you are dating somebody and you are physical with that
person, which I'm assuming as an adult, you're being physical. Why not just like leave that
situation instead of keeping that going for two and a half years. It's not that easy. And you literally have no ties to them.
It's just not that easy.
We want to, people especially,
I can't speak for those that come
from healthy families that stay.
For me, I just wanted to be picked so badly.
I wanted him to love me the same way that I loved him.
I wanted to be the one that he changed for.
I wanted the unconditional love that I had for him.
So I think that there were now today,
I would never do it.
Like if someone-
I was gonna say, you used to be a pick me girl,
but I don't feel like you are anymore.
No, that relationship was the most I've ever loved
and the most I've ever lost.
And I would never, I needed that lesson so bad.
And I've heard, what is the saying for people
who are very religious that say like,
God will give you the same obstacles over and over again
until you learn your lesson?
Lesson, yeah.
I only needed one lesson.
It was a five year long lesson, but I only needed one.
I will never go through, put myself through,
because a lot of it was like,
you do put yourself through it, right?
Like you can't get, it's a cycle you can't get out of.
I don't really know what the pinpointing,
like obviously the bread crumbing, the narcissism,
the toxicity, like I know that,
but I don't know exactly what it is that makes us,
like other than being like a pick me,
like I want you to pick me.
I don't know.
I don't think it was one lesson though.
I think you have to look at it as you revisited
that situation over a period of five years.
And while it was with the one person,
you continued revisiting that situation,
going back to the drawing board, knowing what you knew,
same things continued happening,
and you eventually got your belly full from it.
So yes, it was a lesson that was from one person,
but I do agree.
I think after you got out of that,
you're not gonna revisit that same situation.
No, I won't revisit that same situation
or anything similar.
Like I said, I will not engage.
Like if I found out that Elijah was even so much
as probably talking to somebody else, and
I think that I would handle it a lot more gracefully now than I would have in the past,
right?
Like we're very explosive, very upset, very emotionally charged today if that were to
happen.
And I'm only speaking by hope that if that were to happen, I would be much more graceful
about it where it's like it's I've done this already
I'm not doing this again. We need to move we need to separate kind of thing, but I don't know
I mean two and a half years for her. Maybe she had the same situation as me
I think it's easier to be graceful once you've already gone through something one time and you can kind of
Grasp that situation a little bit better and you're familiar
and you can kind of grasp that situation a little bit better and you're familiar.
I think the reason that people do get explosive
in situations is because it's something
they have an experience and it's unchartered territory.
So then you go through that explosive moments of time.
And then if you ever have to go through it again,
hopefully you would, that's a point of learning.
Hopefully you would do it more gracefully.
I also didn't have therapy at that time, right?
Like I had no tools to handle things better, you know?
Now I feel like I've benefited so much from years
of therapy, you know?
So just different.
Very different.
And on that note, we have one thing
that we are going to be discussing
that we want to alert you guys about
We're going to be covering american nightmare. You guys can watch it on netflix next week
If you guys want to watch with us, it's going to be um
Talked about on the next episode, but it's a three-part mini series
Again available on netflix. Kale and I will both be watching and both be giving our thoughts
And just want to say thank you guys for always supporting our show. Please subscribe and review on the Apple Podcast app.
Follow and rate on Spotify
or listen wherever you get your podcasts.
Don't forget to follow us on Instagram
and join our Facebook group,
connect with us and our community.
We hope you guys have a fantastic week
and we'll talk to you soon.
See ya.
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