Coffee Convos with Kail Lowry and Lindsie Chrisley - The Chrisley Family Crossover, Part 1

Episode Date: October 13, 2022

It's the episode everyone has been asking for and when you ask, you shall receive! Lindsie brings in Chrisley family members Todd, Julie and Savannah for an emotional sit down to share their truths on the events that have transpired throughout the years. The last time the family was together publicly was in 2017 after filming season finale of Chrisley Knows Best, and since then the family has gone through a public fallout, divorce, and now a reconciliation. Join the Chrisleys in this special crossover event to hear why they decided to do this crossover now, Todd's regret, the possible trauma that Lindsie experienced, the life lessons they've learned, and best of all, how God always had a plan. Check out our great sponsors!!! BetterHelp: Visit BetterHelp.com/coffee to get 10% off your first month! EverlyWell: Get 20% off an at-home lab test at EverlyWell.com/convos  KiwiCo: Get your first month of ANY crate line FREE at KiwiCo.com/coffee  StitchFix: Get $20 off your first fix at StitchFix.com/convos 

What's up kitty gang? This is me, Nanny Faye. This episode you're about to hear is about my family and their crazy shit. I hate gift giving and receiving. Receiving gifts is so weird. What do you say thank you? This is Coffee Convos with Kale Lowry and Lindsay Chrisley. I really want you to be in your feels Kale. That does not interest me whatsoever. I feel very attacked by you. A spirited discussion about motherhood, friendship, family, and life in the public eye.

I'm just not with the fakery anymore. There's a fakery bakery around here. Here's Kale and Lindsay. Good morning and welcome back to another episode of Coffee Convos podcast. The fans are excited and have been requesting this episode for some time now. The last you guys all heard of us collectively was in 2017 and I am thrilled to be here with three very important people today, Julie, Todd, and Savannah. Welcome. Thank you. Thank you.

I am going to conduct this episode as an interview because we have four podcasts that are collectively involved in this Chrisley crossover. The first is Coffee Convos podcast, Chrisley Confessions, The Southern Tea, and Savannah's new project Unlocked. So we are going to get through as much as we can on Coffee Convos. And then you guys can head over to Chrisley Confessions to hear part two, part three on Unlocked, and a fun segment on The Southern Tea. Sounds good.

Okay. So I am very nervous. I normally don't get nervous for Coffee Convos podcast because we normally talk about things like queeps and stuff like that. So for this episode, we're going to do a little pulse check on everyone, and I'm sure that blood pressure is high now. So how is everyone feeling this morning? I'm good. Are you good, Savannah? I'm great, Julie.

Yeah, I'm good. I'm excited. I'm not nervous. No, I have a piece about that. I have a piece I'm glad to be here. And I'm glad to celebrate your success with Coffee Convos. It's, you know, folks, I don't know if anyone knows this, but I'm normally not good at getting beat in the ratings on anything,

but Coffee Convos does that to me. I'm second place, you know, Lindsey's first place on Coffee Convos. Because she talks about things that are inappropriate, and I'm trying to live for the Lord these days. But you still throw some shade. I didn't say anything about not throwing shade. I just don't want to talk about whatever she does say it. Queef.

Yeah, we're not doing like that. Yeah, let's not. Yeah. Okay, so I am nervous because this is the first time that anyone has heard from all of us together since 2017, and me leaving Chris Lee knows best. I feel like it's been a long time coming. Yep.

Yes. It's scary because we are doing this publicly, but it also feels good to be doing it on our own terms. I think that we're at a place in our family that, you know, we've been on television since 2013. We have taken direction from a million different people telling us a million different ways of handling things and a million different versions to repeat.

And so I think that it's that God has been good to allow us this opportunity to be able to sit in one room with one format and control the conversation. This is an opportunity not only for us as a family to continue to heal, but it's an opportunity for all of the listeners out here who have similar issues that have transpired in their family, and there are many. There's just aren't publicized for the world to see. Exactly, exactly.

And so I think that I hope that the pod, I hope that this episode and future episodes and all the projects that we do, I hope that they will continue to a serve the Lord and glorify his name. And then I also hope that people can learn from some of the, some of the mistakes that we've made. Absolutely. This is not a question that I have written down, but it's one that I would love to know.

How do you guys like podcasting compared to reality TV and how do you think that it's different? I'd say for me, and your dad and I, we do our podcast, maybe different, then I'm sure then you and Kale do yours and anybody else. I mean, that's what makes it all. And Stacey is doing hers totally different. Absolutely. And I think that's what makes it so amazing is that you can have so many different formats

and then they all work. But for your dad and I, I mean, I always start my day before I record and prayer. And I always say, you know, I want to make sure that I'm saying what needs to be said. And most of the time I regurgitate what I've learned through myself, just in what I'm going through. I regurgitate that back to the people who are listening to our podcast,

people who have taught me something for the week. I give it back to them. And I like the fact that it's on our terms. We say what we really want to say. And we know that what we record is what you're going to hear. It's what the listener is going to hear. Anybody that has recorded reality TV knows that there are hours and hours and hours of recordings that never are seen.

Or there's a piece of something that's seen just to make it a little bit, they feel better, quote unquote, better for TV. And with our podcast, we don't have that. Right. It's really the stripped down version of who we are. I think for me, I would say television, because it's what I'm most comfortable with. I've been doing it for 10 years. And I think that what I like better about the podcasting is that we do have that control

over what's going on. Compared to when we're filming a television show, what you know, if we say something that the network doesn't feel as appropriate or that they don't want to use or that they want to sensationalize or whatever, then that's cutting and put together in post the way that they want it to read. I think that you and I have had this conversation, Julie, that the podcast has given us a voice that we don't have with television. We get to be more authentic with our podcast and with the things that we're saying.

And, you know, we live in such a climate today that you, everyone's watching what someone's saying and everyone's trying to take out of context what someone is saying. And I feel like with the podcast, I get to say what I want to say. For sure. I think that's, I've already filmed the first episode of Unlocked and the hardest part about that was not having an automatic filter because we're so used to having a filter over 10 years. You just kind of have an automatic filter on, you know what the producers are wanting.

You know what the network's expecting. And so for my first episode, I had to, it was, it took me about halfway through. And then Erin, who, you know, helps me produce my podcast. She was like, Savannah, stop with the involuntary happiness. And I was like, yeah, because I just am always, you put a smile on your face. You learn, it doesn't matter what you're going through. And so what I'm looking forward to most is people seeing the vulnerable moments, me being able to be honest about something and for people to hear about my relationships

and where they've gone wrong and where everything's not always just funny. Exactly. Not everything's always funny. Well, I think that's been, I think that that's been, Lindsey, going back to your question, you know, that's been a bond of contention since season one of Christy knows best is that, you know, we, our show started out as a true docu series, reality television, but the world received it as a comedy. And so obviously, you know, the network and us as a family, we want to feed into

or lean into what and give the public what they want. But I think that what I have learned in this process is that I have always gotten on to y'all your entire life, do not hold it together. Hold it together. You don't need the rest of the world doesn't know about your pain. The rest of the world doesn't need to know about your problems. Deal with those at home. Don't put all your laundry out on the front porch for everybody to see. Today, at the end of the day, you, you, you have a, your loyalty, I believe loyalty is a

huge thing in any relationship, but you got to learn to be loyal to yourself first, you know, to find on self be true. And I think that I did a disservice as a parent by not allowing y'all to truly lean into your raw emotions and, and kind of deal with those at that moment, rather than try to hold them together and then let's fall apart after the cameras go down. 100% society now allows for you to talk about mental health. Whereas I think before that just wasn't normal. I know it's something that you're ashamed of.

You have to hold it all together. You have to look the part, be the part and you cry in your bedroom, cry in the shower and you move on with your day. That's right. That's right. And I, and listen for a large part, that's what I still do. I mean, I don't put all of my emotions out there. You have a select few people that you do, but the rest is going to,

the rest is going to get stone cold tied. Yeah. 100%. And it's funny that you say that because that's a topic that I have down that you and I are going to discuss and how being raised that way, it does create kind of a hard shell and it's hard in relationships. It's hard because I'll look at people. Sometimes I'll be like, dried up, like, well, because I mean, I raised John, I would, I would, whenever y'all, I'd say, stop, dry it up.

Let's move on. Yeah. Well, we all have plenty of therapy. You're a little soft these days. This one over here is like the one with the whale. I mean, she cries if it's 70 degrees or if it's 40 degrees or if she goes to Sam's and she can't get her thing to pull up. I mean, she, you know, she's, I don't know.

She'll cry at the mailman. Yes. Well, she's probably going to start crying now because I would really love to cover on this episode, The Estrangement, where it started and what the family dynamic really looked like prior to The Estrangement and working together as a family and how there are so many pros to that, but also cons. And it's getting colder. So, you know, I had to switch my fixes up.

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And you can just order a refresh as needed or you can just set it and forget it. I don't know which one do you do, Kale? I do every month and then I'll pause. Once I have like enough, I will pause my subscription and then right when the season changes and I'll reactivate it or whatever. I love it so much. It's just so convenient. I will always pay for the convenience factor, always.

So right now Stitch Fix is offering our listeners $20 off their first fix at stitchfix.com slash combos that's stitchfix.com slash combos for $20 off today, stitchfix.com slash combos. I think that the estrangement kind of started when you guys made the move from Atlanta to Nashville. I think this is my opinion and y'all have y'alls, of course, but I think filming the show out of Atlanta, um, having my son there and knowing that my husband's, my husband at the time, um, his parents were there and that that's where we were raising our child. It wasn't an option for me to make the move to Nashville.

And I knew that and to know that not only was my family leaving Atlanta and what we knew or what I've known, also my job was leaving and that was hard to know that even though I didn't let you guys keep Jackson to know that y'all were there, there was still a sense of security knowing that you were just down the road. Right. And so I think, um, my reality looked very different than y'alls because for me to participate in the show, I had a board of flight to come here, you know, and or, you know, or drive. And I did that and went back and forth.

And I think that over time with you guys creating your life in Nashville that it became what you knew. It was, it became our new norm. Yeah. Yeah. And you were filming, you know, every day and I was in less episodes than everyone. Um, and to be in the marriage that I was in at the time and my husband to not want to be involved in the series.

I think that that also created strain that I was unwilling to recognize at that time. You know, I wanted him to be able to live his life and if corporate was what he wanted to do, I wanted to be a supportive wife. However, also selfishly, I wanted him to do what we were doing and I kind of wanted the best of both worlds for him to be able to have a corporate job and to have that sense of security, but to also what I felt like I was doing or what was told to me through my marriage was playing around on reality TV. Um, so I do think that with y'all moving to Nashville, I became much more limited.

Um, and what we would call storyline on Chris Lee knows best and you guys moved on with your life. And I think it did create a sense of jealousy that it wasn't like I was choosing to be jealous. I think it was just everybody else is doing this and now I'm not. Um, I mean, I, and I, and I received that. I mean, I understand that. Um, I think that from where from, and I'm not going to speak for way because y'all can

speak for yourself. I think from my perspective, you had Jackson. You were a very hands on controlling parent and you, we didn't get to keep Jackson. So I didn't feel that. I guess I felt like kind of like what you did, you know, you're down the road. So I was being a grandparent down the road and we didn't have a relationship with will. We didn't have a relationship with his family. Um, and they made no effort for that.

Um, the, when Savannah moved, you were already married. I knew you were safe. She left to come to Nashville and I was worried about her. That's what caused us to move to Nashville. And I was also going through my own struggles and my own journey of figuring out who I was, my mental health, all of those things. So being, you know, I would come home every weekend. Right.

I would, and if I even when filming was still happening there, I would go to class Tuesdays and Thursdays, come home Thursday night, film, then come back Monday night. So it was a, so, but I think going back, what you were saying is that, you know, um, I think that you, from my perspective, and after having all this time to kind of like internalize a lot of this, I think that us leaving triggered in you kind of like, because we have to go all the way back. Right. I think it triggered in you, your, your biological mother's abandonment.

And then now here we are, I'm uprooting everything that you know. We were your stability, your whole life. And now we're, we're uprooting and going to coming to Nashville. Um, it certainly was never done intentionally to cause you pain because I love you as much as I love Savannah or Chase or Grayson. I mean, I don't love any of y'all more than I do Chloe, but I mean, you know, I do love y'all equally as far as my children. But I feel like that there's so much, there's been so much hurt from not communicating it

and not being able to know how to, to properly articulate. Absolutely. The pain and where you are at that present time. Because there's been retaliation due to that. It's you do something, we don't discuss how it bothers us. And then just like, well, I think if you go back to Lindsey, what you were saying to the world and unfortunately at that time, we were part of the world, not really part of your world. Right.

So to the world, you had a perfect life. We didn't know that your marriage wasn't great. We didn't know that your relationship with your in-laws wasn't great. And because of that, you were in the perfect storm. We just didn't know it. And you know, and I look back now, you know, and I've said that I've had this conversation with you, Lindsey. And you and I have talked about what I'm getting ready to say.

How many times I wanted to reach out, you've said, how many times that she had picked up her phone and she stopped. And you have said. Yeah. Yeah. Because there's a lot of hurt. I mean, no, people listening aren't a stranger to hurt. To the situation.

To this, to our situation because it's all been put out there. I mean. Well, it's all been put out. It's all been put out there, but it's been put out there. Yeah. But also too, something I want to address me going through LAX and TMZ getting me about something with Lindsey. And I had just found out some information prior to that that was extremely hurtful that

she had said and done. So therefore I then had a lapse in judgment and acted out of character and did the wrong thing and said negative things about her in the public eye that now I'm like, it should have never happened. But in the irony of that, what you just said is that again, going back to about retaliation because I did that in a tweet and a tweet thing with you on Twitter. Lindsey did things that should and said things that should not have ever been done or said. I perpetuated that by stepping outside of being the parent and stooping to a level

of letting my hurt cloud my judgment. I think it goes back to hurt people, hurt people. And that people say that and they say it very flippantly. But I think sitting here today, it's for hurt people that hurt people. I'm glad that we're here today because our situation is more common than it's not common. And people need to hear it. People need to hear the true story of what our life has been. Not just what our life has been since we filmed, but what my life's been since 1995.

Yeah. When I met you and Kyle and sorry, just take a second. You know, I think there's so much more to our story. And I think that we've all made mistakes. And as a parent, I can say that I hope that with every child, I've gotten better. And but at the time, we did what we, we thought is the best. We knew how to, we did the best. Looking back, looking back, there were things that we should have done differently.

And as a parent, I'm sure Jackson's only nine years old, but you can still, even nine years into it, you can look back and say, you know what, there are things I would have done differently. And that's just a part of life. I mean, you know, part of being, of being a parent and being, being flawed, which is what we all are. It's, um, you know, Lindsay, you and I've had the conversation. You know, you went through this divorce and you went through this divorce on your own. You had no parental or family support. You did it on your own and you have no idea how many times that I wanted to pick up that phone

and call you, but out of fear of it being received in a different way into which I was trying to into, then I, then I wanted it to be received. I let my pride stand in the way of me doing it. Um, now that won't ever happen again, because at the end of the day, I'm going back to what I've always done with y'all as a parent. I'm the parent. You're the child. You are now, I'm the parent.

Y'all are young adults. I have to learn a proper boundary of what I, of how to address y'all and of how to say, this is my boundary. And because this is my boundary, that's letting you know, don't cross it because if you do, now I'm going to have to cross a boundary that you've set. And I think it's getting to a point for you, Todd. And if I'm wrong, correct me, but you said you have this boundary. I think you've also, I've seen this growth in you where you have learned that our adult

children have boundaries that we have to, we have to accept and we have to say, okay, this is Lindsay's boundary and we have to, even though we may not agree with it, or this is Savannah's boundary, even though we may not agree with it, this is their boundary and this is our boundary. And we have to come to a place where we can both say, okay, we can agree to disagree. But at the end of the day, I think, and I've, I've said this many, many, many times and you know it, it's not, I'm going to take my toys and I'm going to go away. I'm going to leave the playground and I'm going to take my toys and go away

because that's not what a family is about. But also too, Lindsay, and you tell me if you agree from our perspective is... I already know where this is going, but go ahead. It's hard for me because we've never, or at least me, I've never known anything other than y'all. And other than you could, like not controlling, but making my every move for me. And now as an adult, I want to have my boundaries, but then there's also times to where I revert back to, well, I want to be the kid.

Well, that's your safe zone. Yeah. And so it's hard and it's, when it comes to me creating boundaries, it's not fair for me to say, oh, I want boundaries, but I want to be a kid too, you know? Well, that's, you know, was that a question for Lindsay? I don't know, do you want to see where I'm going with that? Yes, I do because I think it's hypocritical, but I also do that. Yeah.

I think probably I do it more so than anyone else because I feel like I grew up with y'all. You did. We grew up together. You know, and then had a whole second set of kids and y'all were very different with them than you were me, and that's not a knock by any means. You knew better, I would hope that you would have been better. Me before therapy would have said, why did y'all do this with me, but not make those same mistakes with them, but that's selfish.

That's a selfish thought, but until therapy, I thought that I think as a family because we have always been so close. And as Savannah said, that's all we've ever known. We were just a big family and always together. And, you know, yeah, we had like friends or whatever, but I mean, we were each other's friends and we didn't have boundaries. We had no boundaries. That was the point.

That's right. You know, we never had boundaries. I was just talking about this last night that, you know, dad knew our every move of everything that we were doing. Savannah and I, not everything I've since come to find out. Okay, well, I can't wait to talk about, we're going to talk about that on my podcast about things that we've maybe done that y'all have yet to find out about. I will say that with being as close as we were and knowing everything that we were doing and

literally just having no boundaries. I mean, we lived in a 30,000 square foot home and would oftentimes as siblings find each other and sleep in my bed or shower together. The girls shower together in one shower or y'all be in your bathroom and dad taken a shit and you be in the bathtub and we're just walking in. Like we have literally had no boundaries. There's never been any privacy. No, like mom, they'd be in their bathroom and we just go and sit and like just start

talking. Like it was. And how many times would I say, what am I doing here? My door's closed. My door's closed. Why are you in here? Well, because I had to ask you a question. Like nobody's trying to smell your shit.

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Get your first month of any crate line free at kiwico.com slash coffee. That's your first month free at KiwiCo.com slash coffee. So I think it does go back to we have had to almost learn boundaries as adults probably through therapy for most of us. Well, for all of us. For all of us sitting here. I don't want to speak for anybody who's not here. But we've had to learn that as adults.

And, you know, I think it makes it even harder to have boundaries when we didn't have any growing up. And then I go to college, get a degree. Savannah goes off to school while also filming Chris Lee knows best. And working together as a family. So now that's another that's another layer. Another layer that I think that people don't understand that that's a whole nother navigation. I think very few people, I mean, people have family businesses and things like that. But I mean, you know, it was every day.

People have family businesses. People have family businesses that allow them to have different aspects of that business that they are in control of. Right. Our family business is being in each other's business. Exactly. That's our family. And two, if we're being honest, our relationships have been so rocky because

it was about this picture perfect image, if you think about it. So there was so much hiding from each other of I can say from like a sibling aspect. And even from y'all, it was, I don't want to disappoint. So if I do something, I'm going to hide it. So there was no intention, like we weren't being intentional about our relationships. It was, I need to do better than this person. I need to, you know, be funnier. I need to be noticed more.

I need to be, so it was all about a competition that when in reality we're sitting here, I'm 25 years old, and I really don't feel like I know you. You know, and that's the hard part. It's, I know this, there's this image that we feel like we know of each other. But if we're being honest with each other, we don't. We really don't know because we haven't taken the time. Well, I think there's this gap. I think you have this.

You're referencing that you don't. Yeah, no. Yeah, I'm looking at Lindsay. You go, you know, from this place when y'all were all in the house together. And then you had this huge gap that was probably the time when you should have been the closest that you weren't. And so now it's a rebuilding. And I know that for me, I'm grateful to have another day to rebuild

because someone laid their head down last night and they didn't wake up this morning. That's right. So to have another day to rebuild is a blessing. And I think that, you know, this is what I've shared with you. It's what I've shared with you. You've got one sister. You've got one sister. And at the end of the day, there's something different with sisters.

You have a child now. You could be teaching your sister. Oh, I thought her a lot of lessons that she doesn't even realize that are lessons because she is watching what is going on. Yeah. And I think that was part of it, which we'll talk, we'll go deeper into that on unlocked because just your relationship, your marriage, me getting engaged, me calling it off, kind of the influence of all of it will be a much deeper conversation for sure. I feel like that.

I feel like that it's a God blessing that there was never a time that I did not feel like that we would make it back to each other because had I ever felt that way, I feel like that I would have literally been defeated. I feel like that I would have just given up. As long as I could see your stuff on social media, you know, and that's the other thing. So you're admitted, you are admitting on here to stalking. Yeah. Oh, I did check your stuff because I mean, because I mean,

that's the only way I knew how you were doing. But then I realized that social media is really just a lot. A lot. It's a smoke screen. It's a lot. Yeah. It's the highlight reel. That's right.

It's the highlight reel. And you know, I didn't know all the pain you were going through. I didn't know about the divorce. And you know, I mean, I read these articles that, you know, well, you know, your dad was, there was a thing on the Instagram the other day where somebody said, well, I hope that Todd, you stay out of this and doesn't ruin the like the first marriage or something. Well, I heard you were in a car wreck and dead the other day on Instagram. So like you literally can't, you can't trust.

But you know, I want to be very clear. I never had any involvement in your marriage. There was never any involvement there. So I didn't know what was going on other than I was finding it out the same time. Everyone else was finding it out on whatever you would post or what would come out in the press. You know, I would get those phone calls, you know, from my agent every day or every other day, you know, someone's asking for a comment, you know, will you comment on this? No, we're not commenting about that.

We're not talking about this. And now I'm just willing to talk about everything. I'm willing to talk about it all because a, I think that shame is like cancer. And we've talked about this on the Priscilla Confessions. Shame is like cancer. If you feed it, it spreads and I don't want, I don't have any shame. I feel like that my shift that when it comes to shame, you know, I don't want to be controlled by that.

I want to say, you know, I've made mistakes in the way that I have handled certain situations. Um, we all have, and I can't focus when I say we all have made mistakes. I got to focus on the ones I made. I can't get you to show up at the same place at the same time that I'm showing up emotionally and psychologically. And, but what I can do, if I love you enough, if I get to that finish line first, I want to, I'll sit there and wait on you. You have to show up where someone else is.

And I think that's something that we have kind of missed along the way of expecting, and I say this all the time, that you try to have a logical conversation with somebody that you feel like what you're saying is very logical, but they're not receiving of it. If the person is not ready to receive it and not showing up to the same place you are, you have to meet them where they are, even if you're ahead of them. But I don't think that, no, I don't think any of us sitting here in 2017 would have said that or would have, would have figured that out. No, no, life has a way of humbling, absolutely.

And life has a way of teaching you experiences as bad as some have been for, I can speak for myself and I think for you. This past couple of years, I have learned more about myself than I could begin to even start to think. Well, you know, listen, you learn through pain. Y'all've taught me, anyone I come in contact with now, I'm like, I've never seen two people dig more into their faith and through life's crappiest circumstances, which is when normally you turn away because you wonder, people look at Christianity and God when things are good.

Yeah, exactly. Literally. I have that. Yeah. Yeah. Yes. And y'all've chosen to still stay very steadfast and it's taught me because y'all know I went to onsite and when I went to onsite, one of the things that I truly was working on was

being so mad at God because why, you know, and I looked at it and I was like, but look at my mom and dad, look at how they're handling it. Look at how they're, and so it helped me to get out some of that anger, but I've also had to work through it myself. We all process pain differently and we all process it in a different, you know, in our own time. Yeah. I think that if that is what you've taken from this, then that's part of our testimony.

Absolutely. Is that we have a child that's watching how we do and how we live in our faith. What I can say to you though is that I firmly believe that what God brings us to, He brings us through and that I don't serve a God that is what if. Well, I think that's evident of this evidence because we're all for sitting here today. So I think that's evidence that things can happen when you least expect it. God can calm the storm with a whisper and I think that going back to you, going through your divorce, it will probably be one of my moments of regret.

It's a moment of regret for you, but it's a moment of thankfulness for me because I think if I wouldn't have navigated that situation by myself and I've told you this before privately and I'll say it publicly today that when you have nothing, you have to hit your knees and ask God, please help me. Let me tell you something, sister. Your dad and I are there and I think his regret is, listen, does any parent want their child to go through a divorce? No.

You don't lay in bed and I ain't talk about your dreams for your children that, oh my gosh, well, I hope they get through at least one divorce. No, that's not something you ever want for your child. I think his regret is not being there for you. You know, we don't wish any ill will on will because we don't know will. You know, that has been, you guys have always said, mama is such a, you know, she walks around with rose colored glasses on. She thinks we're going to be this one big happy family, you know, in my mind as naive

as I was and am maybe I'm sitting here thinking we're going to vacation together and we're going to share birthdays together and we couldn't because we couldn't because we were playing reality TV. Exactly. Now I want to address that comment because I mean, you know, as much as I serve God, that doesn't mean I don't still get pissed off for will to say to diminish what you were doing to, to make a living and what we were doing and are doing go play on reality television. Had you not been playing on reality television, he wouldn't be able to subsidize his living

today. So I am proud of what I have done on reality television and proud of what you and I am proud that you took whatever I've always said to y'all everything that I do is for you. It's for my children. Take it and grow with it. Take it and make it bigger. You took my last name that I gave you at birth that turned into something through Chrisley knows best.

You left Chrisley knows best and you started coffee combos. You I've said to you, you took the platform that I created and you jumped off of it. Absolutely. You built your own platform and that is that from a parental standpoint. That is a wonderful feeling as a parent and it goes back to what I've told you all before. If you go out here and I tell you don't do something, I really don't think that's what you should do and you succeed at doing it. I still get to be right because you're still my child and you did something that was good

and you took and created a platform from what you came from and you've done exceptionally well with it and I'm proud of that. I mean, I'm probably, I don't know all the stuff that y'all talk about. I'm Julie. Don't tune in. I'm not. Julie tells me not to listen to it, but you know, the, I think that you have a market, you have a viewership or a listenership that is different than what I'm going to have and

that you will have something with unlock that may be different than what all of us have, but I do believe that we have a lot of crossover from each other. I feel like that watching you grow your business, whether that be coffee convos or Southern Tea or, you know, your brand work, things like that, but still watching you be a mother. I don't care about the podcast. I don't care about the, the brand work. What have I said to you about Lindsay is an exceptional mother. What have I said to you about your sister?

That is the thing that I'm most proud of you for because the thing that has, the thing that has held you back your entire life is the thing that you became the best act. The thing that you, that you longed to have your whole life was a mother that did that worshiped you the way you worship Jackson. And I now understand that it, that you Julie could only give to Lindsay what you were capable of giving and what she was ready to receive and what you were willing to allow because I think, you know, from the very beginning, you were not allowed to discipline them. You could not put your hands on them.

They were my children. I made that very clear. These are my kids. So I kind of went into that, into our marriage, bringing my two children and saying to you, these are my kids. And even after Jason Savannah were born, it was kind of me chasing Savannah and Todd Lindsey and Kyle. It was very much like that.

Even though they were his kids too. And the irony of that way. But the irony of that is, is that you, Lindsey, felt like, or you've stated in the past, that it was you, that you and Kyle were on the outside looking in. We're actually covering that on unlocked. Okay. So we can't go into that here. So a change of season means longer days, better outdoor activities and more ways to get healthy.

This is one of my goals that we just talked about on my live and on the podcast. But Everlywell has tests that you can do from home, they have at-home lab tests, and you can also add their vitamins and supplements to your daily routine, which is really nice. And I just want to take better care of my health, you know? I know. We talk about this all the time. This time of the year, I definitely need to like up my vitamins and always do. So I love that Everlywell has high quality vitamins and supplements that help support

your overall health. You can choose from like different options. Like I said, vitamin D, 3, and Omega 3 fish oil, Kyle and I have regularly taken these tests and absolutely love it because you can just do it from the comfort of your own home. And for those of you who haven't heard of Everlywell, Everlywell is digital healthcare designed for you all at an affordable and transparent price. They have over 30 at-home lab tests, Kyle and I have taken so many of them. And I recently just did the women's health test and am waiting on the results from that.

But you will be able to choose from tests that make the most sense for you to get the answers that you're looking for. Yeah, it's just super easy. And for our listeners of the show, Everlywell is offering a special discount of 20% off an at-home lab test at everlywell.com slash convos. That's everlywell.com slash convos for 20% off your next at-home lab test, everlywell.com slash convos. I just think that everyone's perspective is different because to me, all of you are mine.

You're all my children. So I never could relate to any of you feeling different because I didn't feel different. But my perception from my eyes looks different from her perception from her eyes, yours, yours. Absolutely. Anybody else. But I think that, you know, going back to it, your greatest accomplishment and I want you to see this early on and not take until you're 50.

Your greatest accomplishment is your children. And Jackson is your greatest accomplishment in regards of how successful coffee convos is or Southern Tea, our future projects that we've got coming, regardless of how successful they're going to be, because I do believe that God has his hands on those and that God's plan is to prosper us. Anything that I have ever done or will do will ever be a bigger priority or a greater accomplishment than that of raising my children and of being a husband to you, Julie, and first of being a child of God.

So the things that you all find joy in today are not the things that I find joy in today. I don't like to film television every day. Y'all have known that for years, I've tried to pull away and somehow I keep getting pulled back in over and over and over, but we've got things we've got to accomplish. Yeah, clearly, daddy keep going. Yeah. I got tacky by Savannah. I got all these projects.

I got to find me a man. So, uh-huh. Keep going. I hope you have better luck with that. What's your next question, darling? I would like to circle back to the divorce just for a second because I think that God's timing is perfect and impeccable because had you been involved in my divorce, some of the circumstances would have looked very different.

I think you would have had me advocate for myself more regardless of the position I played that led me to be divorced. Um, well, because I believe that, you know, we all make mistakes. You have acknowledged your mistakes and I have shared with you privately and, you know, you've said before we started this podcast, things that we've talked about that we're open to talk about here. I have shared with you, you had an affair, but, and I don't condone that. I was probably the hardest on you for that, um, but you are not exempt from forgiveness.

Amen. God forgives you if you come to him with a repentful heart. And there's not one person sitting in this room that hasn't made a mistake at 100%. Um, okay. Well, then I guess I'm absolutely something I want to point out is, like you said, by no means is it saying, Hey, what I did is right. But also if there was a healthy relationship to begin with, that's right. If each person was getting what they needed out of it and was being respected and was,

you wouldn't be searching elsewhere. And that's up to us at that point to say, Hey, I'm not getting what I need. So I need you to give it to me, but you don't learn that. I'm speaking from experience too. You don't learn that until after the fact. Well, listen, I say that if you know something's going in badly, you wouldn't do it. But I will say that it's one of the toughest things that I've ever struggled with. I thought by getting the divorce, that once I got that final paperwork, that the pain

would end and it didn't, it just created closure for that chapter. But then for myself and forgiveness to myself has not happened. And I want to help you as much as I can with that. And I think that, you know, the, the first thought is exactly what Savannah is saying. You wouldn't make certain decisions if needs were being met. Right. However, I look at it very differently now because I should have been woman enough to say this is not working.

I need to be strong enough to leave and be done. Well, I think for you, Lindsay, it, it goes back so much. It's much deeper than that for you. Because you knew the pain that you experienced growing up. You have known that pain since you were what, five years old. Yeah. So you were so determined that you weren't going to repeat that for Jackson, that you stayed way longer than what you should have.

When I came home, I think one of the last scenes that viewers of Chris Lee knows best all of me was in 2017, me coming home and saying I was divorcing and then I kind of disappeared from the series to only actually end up reconciled and then end up divorced now that we're back here today. I do think that my desire to have a nuclear family was the priority even though it wasn't healthy. I was not using resources that are available like counseling. We went to therapy once, saw a Christian counselor and pretty much realized then that he wasn't

going to admit fault and I wasn't going to admit fault. So we just weren't going back because we both left angrier, angrier than we arrived. At that point, I should have known that the writing was on the wall and also done something about it. Well, listen, we can live our life with the coulda, shoulda, woulda. But what I need for you to understand is that you don't need to have forgiveness from anyone other than God. And once you truly can accept that forgiveness from God, you will forgive yourself.

And my advice for whatever it's worth to you is that when you know better, you do better and you have an obligation to do better at that point. And I look at the growth and you and you, Julie, all three of us have talked privately about you for a year now. The growth that I have seen is astronomical. It makes me, it has taken me to places where I have literally wept and got on my knees and thanked God that he had stepped into your life and that you had received him. And for that, that's the greatest blessing because without him, we just, we just exist

and life is too precious to just exist. I don't know if any of you have ever felt this way, but through the estrangement and also that was, that was one journey with God that looked very different than the journey that I have gone on since my divorce. And I oftentimes have felt unworthy of God's grace because I have felt like a user because I went to him when I needed him, not when I wanted him. Absolutely. I can only speak for me, but absolutely I have, I have felt that way.

And if the last few months have taught me anything, it's taught me that he is the only steady. He is the only absolute, never changing, never faulting, never disappointing thing in your life. And we've all been guilty, it's easy to say, oh God is so good to me, I've got to hit reality show, my kids are beautiful, they're healthy, I'm good, God is just amazing. When everything's going right. When everything's going right.

And something you said, which is a God moment, as you use the word worthy, and that's the one word that I chose for myself at onsite, because through my life, I've not felt worthy because I had a certain level of shame of I should have done this, or I should have said this, or I should have, so therefore it's my fault, I should have done all these different things in certain situations. And I was not giving myself forgiveness when reality, I wasn't giving myself forgiveness because I didn't feel worthy of it. I didn't feel worthy of it, but there was also, I didn't know who I'd be without it.

If I held this anger towards myself, then at least I know that's how I feel. You know, listen, I've lived with that, I mean, and I know exactly what you're talking about because I knew and I've had this conversation. You know, there are certain things that have happened to me in my life that I don't know, and I think that I've said this to you, Lindsay, in regards to your biological mother, the anger that I have had for her all of these years, I don't know how to let it go because I've existed with it for 30 years. So now if I let that go, what does my, what does my day look like?

What does my life look like? What is your identity? You know, what is my identity? And we've had that conversation before. You and I have talked about that many times because growing up, I always felt it was important to include her because in my mind, the best thing for you at Kyle was to have a relationship with your mother. And your dad would get angry.

I don't know that you guys understood it always, but if there was an event or if there was something, I always wanted to include her because in my mind, I thought I want these children to be as whole as they possibly can be, but I remember, but I think that doing that in conversations that you and I've had, it created a bigger hole because it did not allow you, it would say it in your own words. I mean, you said it the best. I think that I oftentimes say this, that if people are going through a situation where it divorces necessary and it's just not going to work out and there are kids involved, that

if one parent can't be consistent, then the best thing that they can do is just bow out because that is the most unselfish decision. It's selfish to involve yourself when you want to involve yourself and it's selfish to involve yourself when you can't feel the need that your children have. And I think that you were thinking by incorporating her that did feel that need. And for Lindsey and for Kyle, because Kyle has said this and I don't want to speak to him because he's not here, but I mean, in conversations that he's had with me, was that Kyle has said the same thing that you have said.

We would have been better off had we never had any more involvement with her because then Julie could have been our mom. That's what we would have known and that would have been the end of it. Now a word from our sponsor, BetterHelp. It can be tough to train your brain to stay in problem solving mode when faced with a challenge in life, which Lindsey and I have had plenty of those this year. And when you learn how to find your own solutions, there's no better feeling. Visit betterhelp.com slash coffee today to get 10% off your first month.

That's better, H-E-L-P dot com slash coffee. Honestly, I have received so many messages from listeners of all of our shows talking about how they've started using BetterHelp and it's such a great feeling to know that people are reaching out, doing the right things for themselves and finding a therapist because I can tell you when you can't solve a problem yourself, a therapist can help you find a solution for your problems. So if you're thinking about giving therapy a try, BetterHelp is a great option. It's convenient, accessible, affordable and entirely online.

When you want to be a better problem solver, therapy can help get you there. Visit betterhelp.com slash coffee today to get 10% off your first month. Visit betterH-E-L-P dot com slash coffee. Next question. I have a couple of things that I want to say. You guys can give your opinions on this. I think people are going to want to know why it's important for us to sit down and do this crossover now.

And the short answer for me is the timing is right because it's on what I feel like is collectively our own terms. I think we all are able to meet each other at the same place now. It's a sense of healing for me and public acknowledgement and honesty to say this is our story and it's not beautiful and it's hard at times and it's happy at times and it's been devastating at times but this is the story, this is the truth. I think that for me, if I had to do it over again, I try to take the positive out of the entire situation because if you don't, and therapy has taught me that, if you don't look

at the positives of the situation and you dwell on all of the negatives, you're not going to be healing. And so to be able to be here, I feel blessed but also my biggest advice to anybody that is going through any type of estrangement, the time that you lose isn't worth your position in the fight. I agree. I agree. I don't think it could have been said any better.

I think for me, why do it now because now is my time. Now I'm ready to do it. Now I'm at a place, I'm at a place with you that the healing has begun. You and I have said the I'm sorrys. We have acknowledged our contribution to each other's pain and I was never going to do this based off of a network telling me to do it or someone else telling me to do it. I was always going to do it.

I always knew the time would come. I always held on to that hope and my faith never wavered in that. But I also always knew that I would do it when I was ready. I think people are going to want to know who reached out first to sit down for the podcast. I can say that I did. I think that it's the right platform. I think like we all discussed earlier in this episode that it is a place that you can come and be raw and real and unfiltered.

Unlocked is a great name for a podcast because it's true that that is what it is. People have followed the family for so long at this point that you almost feel a sense of the falling out and we use social media improperly along with the fallout that we involved the public. And so there is a sense of I feel like I owe the public an answer. And I think that exactly what you're saying. I think it's our time. It's easy for us to sit and say social media is a smokescreen when we've been guilty of

using it as a smokescreen and we've been guilty of being petty and putting no not me, but others in this room have been guilty of being petty basically all three of us and I'm not saying that I'm a saint. I'm just saying when you are on so you are when it comes to social media I'm just saying that I think it's a redemption day. I think it's a redemption day that anybody listening to this podcast as you said our story has gotten ugly at times and it has been so hard and it's been great and beautiful at times as with any family.

And we've been manipulated by outside sources as well. Absolutely. That's the main thing. We let the devil had a seat at our table. Absolutely. We know from people sending, delivering false messages and I think that's happened on both sides as well. I think that this truly is a piece of the puzzle that has been missing and it does feel like

a sense of relief to be able to do this and to be able to move forward and not feel like we're publicly hiding or hiding behind anything from the public. This is the story. This is what it is. There's healing taking place and that's it. Right. Well, as we've said on our podcast, when your life is shattered and it's in a million pieces and you're trying to put all the pieces back together again, it still is a cracked mess.

And until you bring God into it to fill in those missing pieces, that's when it becomes whole. And I think collectively as a family, we're finally at that place where we're not trying to get together. We still have work to do. We're working progress. We're at the beginning of it. Absolutely.

And I know for Lindsay and I that we'll discuss on our podcast is because y'all three have had tougher conversations. Y'all have invested the time and the energy. We really haven't. We've had surface level conversations. So I feel like the deepest conversation we've had is what we just had and what we will have, which to me is I love in fairness, I will say that I grew up with you and my main goal when I knew that it was an option for the reconciliation to take place was to reestablish

that relationship with you because you are my son's grandfather and that was my main goal if I got nothing else out of it. And would love to say that Jackson asked and does a pulse check every single week, mom, can we say that we are back with Papa again? He asked that every single week does Instagram now. That was my main goal. And if anything else came out of it, where I have a relationship with you and I reestablished relationships with my siblings, that that was just the icing on the cake.

But for my son to at least know my dad, that was my goal. I will not participate in any conversations here or in any future podcast referencing any headlines that have come out that oftentimes are stated to make people click. None of that stuff is important. No, and I'm not going to talk about it because I'm not going to let somebody else go click it. And I think the hardest part with that is people don't realize and now hopefully the people who are listening will after this episode that these are real people and real

feelings involved. So what you're reading is real issues that are going on with families, but also bits and pieces of things that have been pieced together to try to make a story make sense to the public that we haven't spoken on. Right. Exactly. I would like to ask you guys one question and then we're going to do some foul stuff really quick.

Some foul stuff. Some foul stuff. Yeah. You know, like F-O-U-L. Yeah. Yeah. F-O-U-L. Can you guys offer any advice to other parents that are going through estrangement with their

children? I don't want to talk about estrangement with siblings because I'm also going to reference the same question to you guys on Unlocked. I'm going to say for me, the advice that I can give is that in your life, you have to as much as you love your children, you have to give them to God. And I think every day I pray for all of my children and my grandchildren. And I think we so live in a culture where we want to control everything. And when you can truly give your kids to God, I think it's when you can start to see things

happen. I agree. I think that if I was giving any advice to a parent that has estrangement from a child is do not let the hurt hinder you from being the parent. Sure. I think that my hurt hindered me from being the parent for the first time in your life. Hurt and pride. Mine was more hurt because pride was never an issue for me because I didn't care about

that. I think it's an issue for a lot of parents who are estranged from their children though because they want to be right. And I think that we had already been through other things prior to the estrangement that the pride aspect was probably a little gone. Right. Yeah. That wasn't a part for me.

It was the hurt. And I think the hurt hindered me from being the parent that I know that I am and that I should consistently be. So I would say that, you know, don't let those lines become blurred. I'm the parent. You're the child. You're the parent. You're the parent.

You're the parent. You're the child. And I need to be a parent. I need to act like a parent all the time. And parenting a child and parenting a young adult is entirely two different ways of doing things. And I was not in a place to accept some of the decisions that you had made, but I now know that I didn't have to accept them in order to still help you get to where I needed

you to get to with you feeling like you got there on your own. I think that's the advice that I would give. Up next is some foul play for you, gang. So the first listener writes in, okay, so I was a mom of two when this happened and newly divorced. I had never really been super experienced sexually. And so I will call this my hoe phase. I was always I was always super careful about having sex and war protection on all of that

jazz. But this one guy stopped me at the mall. He was older than me, much taller than me. He smelled good and he drove a bin. So naturally I was like, I'm not used to this. So immediately, yes. So one night when my kids were with their dad, I had my friend over and she invites a guy. So I invite a guy from the mall.

We're all drinking and having a good time swimming in the pool. And my friend goes to have sex with her guy and somehow I end up in the basement with mine and I'm tipsy at this point. I don't know if he is, but I'm very awkward because like I said, I have not really been experienced at this time. Every single time he strokes inside of me, I fart. What? Get out of here.

I'm dying. I'm dying. I'm dying. These are not queefs, they are loud AF. So I'm crying inside my head and thankfully it's pitch dark, but I don't know how to end the situation. So I literally just pushed him off of me and immediately acted like I was in pain because of his penetration.

I never talked to him again. I was mortified. My God, somebody wrote that and submitted it. I hope they were anonymous. Oh my God. Do you think? Okay, my question. Let me just tell you something and we're going to move on.

This woman right here who's got two children, meeting somebody in the mall and hooks up with them because they smelled good, drove them Mercedes-Benz and she's talking about farting when he penetrates her. She needs psychological help. But do we think that, there's a couple things that I want to say about this. So do we think that because she's inexperienced in the sexual game, that she's not, she's not, she's inexperienced in having class, no. Do you guys think that she was so inexperienced in the sexual game that she was actually queefing

and thought it was a fart? Or did she smell it? You just have taught me about all this stuff. Stop. Stop. Because if she farted, it probably smelled. I can't. I just can't.

Y'all are all. I thought that somebody would have meant to these things. Don't even read that. Don't even read that. Okay. The second listener writes in, so back in the day, I used to hook up on the low with my friend's brother. One day.

Oh my God. That's just a bunch of hoes on this podcast. Is this you? Did you write in? I probably knows about Tyler. Savannah. That was all on the show. One day, my dad, my dad took said friend and I out to lunch at Red Robin after we partook

in some recreational marijuana use and I picked the phone. The daddy did marijuana with them. No. No. Kids. The kids. And I picked the fuck out. Well, of course.

Of course. Yeah. Well, it read Robin. Picked out. Like, ate too much. Well, of course, as soon as we get back to her place, I get a text from her brother asking to hook up on my way and said that I'm on my way, baby, about five minutes into giving him head.

My stomach started to feel. Oh, I can't even. We're not even having these conversations. We're not having such conversations. My stomach started to feel real heavy. And I went a tad too deep and gagged, which caused me to throw up all of the Red Robin burger and bottomless fries that I had just consumed needless to say, I was mortified, but obviously he wasn't too traumatized because he's still in my DMs over 10 years later.

She literally threw up on his dick and he's still in her DMs. Okay. I'm not going to have this conversation because I raised you better and this person wrote this in. I didn't write this. I'm just reading it. If he puked on him while doing that 10 years ago, then he's in the kinkier stuff today. If he's still hitting her back up.

So he's a, he is a, he's a potential future scatter. Okay. No, I'll do that. Wait, you've done that? No. Get out of here. I'm not. I've always said, what's down there?

Don't belong up here. This is a gym. Okay. The last listener writes in, hello ladies, love you all very much. Here's my foul play story for you guys. Me and my husband, we get people wanting us to pray for them. Yeah. You need to also pray for these people.

Yeah. I am. I am. Don't you worry. Here's my foul play story for you guys. Me and my husband have been together for seven years and he has been begging to go down on me since we started having sex and I've always said no. Huh?

Wait a minute. Seven years and he's not done that. Well, how did it last seven years? We don't know. Well, I gave him the other day. It was really good. So I finished in his mouth before I could tell him to move. Wait a minute.

That doesn't need all that. He got a mouthful and finished immediately, ran to the bathroom and mouthwashed multiple times and then brushed his teeth multiple times. So I felt bad for him. I was so embarrassed. First of all, I can't even look. This is all of us. People are awful today.

I mean, people, the things that they'll say. She's going to be praying all day long. Oh my God. I got to get in my car right now because I've got to go listen to Joel Osteen. I just, y'all, this is more than I can stand. I'm just wondering if he had to brush his teeth because she had hair down there. Do you think that? I know this has been done to shock me.

Yeah. This has to have been done to shock me because if there's really a check out here that's writing this stuff. Okay. But the last question and then we're done though. Do you think that most men can tell the difference between a quiff and a fart? That's the common question. First off, I didn't even know what the first one was until you put that on this show.

And I think that that is just something that let me let you in on a secret because since you've decided to bring up such fail, a man, the least a man knows about a woman's hygiene, the stronger that relationship will be. There is a reason that your mother and I have got 28 years. She's got a bathroom. I have a bathroom. Oh, I peed with the door open. Okay.

And you have no successful relationship. Right. So, I mean, I'm just sitting and telling you there are certain things that a man does not want to know that a woman does that we know she does. See, like if I had to take a shit at this point. Ladies don't say that. Okay. Well, if I had to dump in the toilet, I would leave the home, drive to somewhere

that I knew that had like somewhat of clean toilets and go, I would never poop in the same house ever. Do you understand that your mother and I have been together for 28 years and you've never smelled her turd? Never have I ever had your mother too fart on me or have I gone and sat in a bathroom while she is using the bathroom because when I look at her, I want to look at something that I think that's pure and clean and this woman has respect for herself. And therefore, that respect spills down on me.

Me? Have you farted in front of somebody? No, I really don't think I have. Well, I would hope not. I don't think so. I mean, if I did, it was accidental, but she's done it. It's not accidental. She's done it.

I can tell she's done it. That's not accidental. Well, then it's never, you've never had an accident. We're just, we're just different humans while I'm going to show my worst so that like you know what you're getting. So it only goes up from there, you know, oh my God, you know, we don't know when the next question doesn't need to be, why are you? There is no more question.

It's just, I would like to thank you all for sitting down with me. I would also like to thank our listeners for listening to part one of our Chrisley Crossover event. Make sure that you tune in to part two over on Chrisley Confessions podcast, subscribe to all of our shows on the podcast app, Spotify, Apple podcast, and always podcast one first. We hope that you guys all have a great week and we'll talk to you soon. Good luck and God bless. Thank you.

See you next time fluffers. Hi, it's Todd Chrissy from Chrisley Confessions and my family is telling their truth. And if you want to hear the whole truth, you've got to listen to my podcast, Chrisley Confessions, Lindsay's podcast, coffee combos in the Southern T and Savannah's new podcast unlocked. It's our family story. All the gory details spread out over four shows. So listen, follow, rate and review now at Apple podcast, Spotify, Amazon music and your favorite podcast app.