Coffee Convos with Kail Lowry and Lindsie Chrisley - The Roommate Test: How many Dyson Vacuums is too much?

Episode Date: October 20, 2025

CC442: On this month's bonus episode... Kail and Lindsie are together in Delaware, where sales tax is a myth and hotel parking lots are giving sus vibes. The Roommate Test has us diving into who takes the longest in the morning to who would be the one to snoop around. Plus, Lindsie still has her 7 vacuums, Kail is a chronic dish-soaker (aka she forgets about them), and a listener asks how to have patience with their child.Thank you to our sponsors!Chime: Get started at chime.com/convosDraftKings: Download the DraftKings Casino app and sign up with promo code COFFEERocket Money: Cancel unwanted subscriptions by going to RocketMoney.com/COFFEECONVOSSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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What do you say thank you? This is coffee convoes with Kail Lowry and Lindsay Crisley. I really want you to be in your feels, Kail. That does not interest me whatsoever. I feel very attacked by you. A spirited discussion about motherhood, friendship, family, and life in the public eye. I'm just not with the fakery anymore. There's a fakery bakery around here.

Here's Kail and Lindsay. Good morning and welcome back to another episode of Coffee Convo's podcast. We are in Delaware. And we're in Camel. I absolutely love the fact that I came here. I never knew that this was the first state of the United States. Yes, and there's also no sales tax. Wait, what?

So, I don't really know what that means, but I also know that a lot of banks and corporations will open in Delaware for their tax purposes. So like Capital One is here, like a lot of places are here. That's so interesting. Yeah. So my ride in was, actually great. Was it scenic?

I don't know. I didn't look around. What? Like, I was just right in the back of person's car. Yeah, but you didn't look out the window and, like, see anything like, what is, what are your feelings about Delaware versus Georgia? Um, no feelings. Okay. It's very flat here. Yeah.

Have you seen any Amish buggies lately? No, I did not see any Amish buggies. I have not seen one Amish person. However, I've only left the hotel, which is Holiday Inn Express. I need to ask you some questions about that. The only place that I've been is Wawa. Oh, I'm so glad. But Wawa is a broke version of Quick Trip.

Really? It's not as big as quick trip. You made Wawa sound like it was a theme park of gas station. Yeah, like a Buckees. Kiel, there is nothing about Wawa that's like a Buckees. Yeah, mine. the merch. No.

It's like... Have you been to Buckees? Yeah. I just spent a lot of money at Buckees the other day because I went for the first time and it was What'd you get? Everything. I got Beaver Nuggets. I got beef jerky.

I got souvenirs. What kind of souvenir? What kind of? Sweat shirts? Candles. And I haven't divided it up between the kids yet, but I'm going to. So you got everything for like everyone? Yeah.

Yep. Like the beaver nuggets, the bold and spicy, and the white cheddar are so good. Okay, I only thought that they have one. It's giving Pirates Ruby. No, it's giving like, it's like caramelized or something. Oh, I don't like the caramel ones. It's kind of like sweet. Oh, no, the ones I like are this.

I like savory. I'm not like a sweet person. I got it, them, obviously. I'm like an in-betweener, you know? I like a good sweet when I like a sweet and I like a good savory when I like a savory, but I'm probably about 90% savory, 10% tea. Also, is Holiday and Express like the best hotel you'll have? We used to have a really good hotel at the casino.

It got bought out within the last, like, five years. I don't, I have not ever really, um, experienced Delaware hotels, and I would imagine that they're pretty jinky. So when I checked into the hotel, the guy was very, very nice. I feel like people here are very nice. He gives me the room. and I go up there and realize that I'm in someone else's room. Are you serious?

I'm dead serious. Like the bed looked disheveled. There was a towel on the floor whenever I walked in and a remnant of dog food on the floor. And the entire hotel smells like cigarettes. So for those reasons alone, you need to know, I love you, but build a guest house. No, I plan on it. Because it's a little much for me. I would agree.

I would be very upset. But to be fair, I think the casino hotel that may still be there would probably be so expensive that it wouldn't be worth it. Oh, it would be worth it. I'm just telling you it would be worth it. Okay. So also, I'm like trying to prepare this trip and I text Kristen and I'm like, hey, I just want to make sure that the hotel that I'm staying at has a gym. That's it? Oh, yeah.

It has one. I go on there to ride the stationary bike, and the pedals are broken. That's the only workout that I do. I'm going to need Delaware to get it together. I'm going to need Paris Hill Inn to bring the Hill-ins, because this is looking at the hotels, they don't seem. It's like a bad look. You know what I mean? I mean, you can stay here.

Yeah, I know. At this house. I know, but I'm kind of scared to do that. You know, I like the idea of a... I don't like to stay in my own house by myself. Right. That's a whole other conversation for another day. But yeah, I feel secure staying at the holiday in Express,

minus the fact that I'm looking out over a parking lot and people are just hanging out of their cars. So, like, what's the deal with that also? But why do people hang out of their cars here? Like, on the outside of their car. There is nothing else for them to do. And actually where you're staying is where a lot of addicts are are putting up signs.

So there's not... Delaware needs a little bit of work. So I should not go outside of the hotel. No, I would not recommend it at all. I walk in to Hill's Content House, and she says she has a present for me, and then arrives with Clona Willie plus Balls Kit to make a vibrating silicone replica of any penis and balls.

And while I love the thought, and wait oh and it's light skin tone as well um i love the thought of this and i actually wanted to do it i had a conversation with somebody about this the other day oh well he also talked about it on this podcast so i thought it was fitting but i sent a text to someone um showing them the photo of the gift that you so generously gave me and he said i'll do it for you. Yeah. Yeah, because if he's ever out of town and you need to satisfy needs, I feel like this is a great option because you feel right at home. It's a replica. The confusing part of that is the vibrating balls. Yeah, I didn't read that part. I only read Clone of Willie and I bought it.

I didn't actually see the plus balls kit, to be honest. I didn't, I missed that part. Are you, are you purchasing one of these or yourself? Correct, yes. But before we get to the next thing. We gotta. Oh, what? This is our Webby Award that we, y'all so graciously voted for us, and we're unboxing it for the first time with you guys on CoffeeCompos podcast. We haven't seen this. Kristen brought it for us this morning, and it says 2025 People's Voice Award winner, podcast show lifestyle, coffee combos podcast. Thanks for all the kitties who listen. That's actually a really really cool. Yeah, it's really cool. It's heavy. Is this your second wedding or third wedding or fourth levy? Third or third I think. I love it. Isn't that cute? Yeah, and I love to see our name on there. I feel

like we're so underrated. We are underrated. I think that people sleep on us, to be honest. Yeah, we're sleeping on us. Speaking of thinking, we have a little game called the roommate test. The roommate test. You ready? you? I'm ready. Okay. The first one deals with morning routine. Who do we think takes longer to get ready in the morning? You? Well, this question is misleading, I feel like, because what are we getting ready for? Okay, fair. If it's, we're going to go, last minute, we're going to go to dinner. Okay. Um, last minute we're going, we're getting like cold, long, ready? Yeah. Like washing hair, shower, hair, makeup. Oh, I have.

I would say it takes about one hour total from start to finish. One hour total start to finish without extensions. Correct. Now that I know how to use my dice and air wrap, I've been straightening my hair with the blow dry tool, which really cuts down on my time. I will tell you that the shark flex style... That I just got? I just got it too. You did? Do you love it or hate it? I absolutely love it. I was just telling percent that it cuts down on my drive time about 50 percent.

50%. Well, so I said in the TikTok, I have the Dyson Air Wrap and I didn't really know how to use it on my longer hair, but on my short hair, it's a game changer. However, I do not like Dyson vacuums. I got, I gave mine away because it was so fucking heavy and like I couldn't use it. I love my sharks. So then when I saw that they didn't have the Dyson Airwaps for, because I was going to get one for here at the content house, they didn't have Dyson at Ulta anymore. They had the shark one. So I ended up getting that. Okay. Well, I feel like the shark one is way better than that. I also have a confession since we're talking about Dyson went through this really weird habit where we were talking about like OCD tendencies and like collecting things I've had collection I collected Dyson vacuums I remember you had like seven different vacuums to do like different tasks like on different surfaces did you see that as a problem by any chance? Well, I mean, obviously at the time when I was doing it, no, until I moved and actually multiple people called me out. I'm not going to say the names of the people that did, but they were like, let's do this is just a little bit excessive. So did you sell them? No,

they're in my garage. So you still have them? Yeah. Did you move to the new house with the seven from your old house? Yes. Because why would I throw away ice in vacuum? I want you to elaborate on what each vacuum is used for. Because I have one back. I have two vacuums. One is has multiple attachments and you can use it multiple different ways. So like I could use it as a hose to suck up couch shit. And then I can also vacuum the floor with it. Do you know what I mean? Okay. So it's like handheld but also like it's not just like the extension tube thing. Okay. So we need to back this story up a little bit like prior to Dyson. Because when I was married, does anybody remember like the range?

rainbow vacuums. They were, like, that knock on the door type thing and people sell them to you. No. And I think they're like $1,500 or something. Like, they're ridiculously expensive, like, more than a Dyson. I bought one. It has a water basin from someone that came to your door. Yeah, they did a whole experiment and everything, like, and showed me. What did Will have to say about that? I didn't tell until I bought it. I mortgaged it. mortgaged a vacuum? Yeah, well, because I was kind of broke at that time, so I really wanted the vacuum, and I was like, I'm just going to mortgage it.

And they gave me, like, a free diffuser. So I justified it. What are you saying? And Will hated that vacuum, and I'm convinced that once we got divorced, he was so glad to see that thing go. I think that's why you got divorced over that vacuum. I mean, it's possible because it pissed him off so bad. But here's the thing. Did you use his credit or yours?

Mine. Oh, okay. I mean, we both have great credit, but I use mine. I don't know. I'm not going to put that on him. You know, it's like, but I didn't pay it off. I did not have debt on that for very long. But it had a water basin, and it was so interesting because you could vacuum your carpets.

This was back when I had carpeted. You could vacuum up your carpets, and you could see every little morsel that was in there. I don't think I would want to. You do, because it's a fixation. It's like a hyper-hick, like I wanted to vacuum every day so I could see what got dirty that day. All right, you might think you have a solid handle on your budget. Maybe your spreadsheet says you should have an extra $1,000 left over each month. But if your bank account is not reflecting that, something is definitely off and rocket money can help you.

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members save up to $740 a year when they use all of the app's premium features. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster with Rocket Money. Go to RocketMoney.com slash coffee combos. That's rocketmoney.com slash coffee convos. RocketMoney.com.com slash coffee compos. One time Lindsay sent me either a picture or a video of she got a, this is, try to follow the bouncing ball here, she got a hydrofacial and sent me the liquid with all the junk from her face. She sent me that and it's giving this vacuum situation.

Like that scenario is giving, I don't want to see that. Like I, it makes me sick to, what I don't know won't hurt me. So at the point that... What I don't know will hurt me. At the point that the vacuum is sucking up all this stuff, I don't want to see it because then I have to really face the music at what is on my floors. I mean, I get that.

You're an avoidant. And I mean, so am I to some degree, but in that area of my life, I'm not. And so, you know, that's a hyperfixation for me. So I was like, well, now Dyson's out, and these vacuums look really cool. And I probably need them. And then they had...

I need them. Not I need one. I need them. but they have like a rose gold one oh my god Lindsay I need that one well the first one that I bought was more like for hardwood surfaces

so it's like okay that's good for here but then what about my rugs so then I bought the next one that would like carpet well then they came out with one specific for pet and then I had Georgia so I justified that one for that and it just kept kind of going more colors came out more dicines need to be purchases.

Not the vacuum colorways. I swear, when I get home, I will take a picture of my collection of my Dyson's in the garage. Link them. You need to make that money back. You need to make that money back because at the point that you're buying a Dyson, several Disons. Yeah. You need to link them at this point moving forward. Probably, but I'll show you guys what I got.

I'm not trying to make anything. She said probably won't. Um, say all of that say I use a shark vacuum inside my house. Love. Like, the Dysons are just resting outside RIP, but like not really because I'm not getting rid of them. I just can't. Unfortunately. So she's a quarter.

I can't. Okay. So next question. This is also morning routine. Which of you makes the bed versus just throws the blanket back over? I don't even throw the blanket over anywhere. I just get out of bed and don't do anything and keep the pushing. Have you ever heard, like, it is a reflection of your day?

Yes. I have heard that. And I would like to say, I agree. Like, if you start your day off with, like, making your bed and, like, making sure things are in order and things like that, I just don't have time. And I know that that sounds like an excuse because it probably is because I don't want to get up an hour. Because I don't want to get up an hour earlier. And it's just, it's bad time management.

It's just bad timing for you. Literally, it's because, like, there was a small period of time where I was doing that. did feel better. But the more children I have, the thought of getting up an hour earlier than I am right now sounds horrible. Yeah. It actually does. And I can't relate to the seven children. I have one. And sometimes that takes me to fuck out. Like when you, so what time does Jackson have to be at school? It's really nice. And actually, what's really nice? What's really nice? When does he have to be to school? A little reason at 9 a. 9?

Yeah. So what time do you guys, because does he take the bus? No, I don't even, he goes to school on Will's Address. Okay. So what time do you have to leave the house? I guess is my biggest question. 805. I have to leave the house no later than 7.30.

You're going to be doing that for a very long period of time because you have a lot of children. Correct. And you're pregnant. What? Wait, wait, wait, wait. I'm just kidding I was like do we know something I don't know

actually Kristen and I always know before you don't know this is true this is y'all always figure me out before I figure me out I have to leave no later than 7.30 and so I get I set my alarm for 630 and by time

I'm like really I should set my alarm for 6 and then by the time I actually am physically up I am up at 630 but what's happening is I'm so fucking tired. My alarm is set for 6.30. I'm not getting out of bed until like 6.45, 7 o'clock. Wait, what?

Then how is it at 6.30? I set my alarm for 6.30. Yeah. But it takes me like 15 minutes to like get up. Okay. I need to know the people that are like that because I can't. Might pass out if I did that. Why?

Number one, I used to do that in high school all the time. And it used to piss my parents off so bad because I would set my alarm. I was like, whole, like full blown prepared and then just fall back asleep once i have fallen back asleep i'm not getting up once i hear the alarm the first time if i like immediately get up no problem i just have such i need i should wake up at six get myself the 15 minutes to be out of my physical bed by 630 and that would really just i could make shift make my bed but i just don't have it in me i'm a tired So I will tell you the middle school schedule, I thought it was going to be, like it is really nice, but it kind of popped up my mornings because I had to move my qualities to an hour later and it's just a little bit like more time.

Like what you're saying, I could see why you wouldn't have time to make your bed because I used to not have time to make my bed. But now I roughly get up around the same time that I would be getting up if I had to do 730s, drop-off so then I have that like extra built-in time to do things that I want to do around house like you know start a load of laundry make my bed in the morning before you take jacks in school he doesn't have to be there until 9 o'clock I'm not doing any of that shit in the morning I'm not doing that I literally can barely function in the morning starting a load of laundry at 730 yes this is the nighttime routine before bed if I know I'm going if it's a day that I'm going to start laundry which is literally

every day the end's and why um why is your face like that just like cannot imagine like that just sounds like pure chaos um so I will sort all of the stuff out at night after I take my bath and then I put it and I start my first load once I wake up like I go into the bathroom brush my teeth wash my face put on some eye gels I'm feeling alive and I'm like I got this like the downy sees me coming then I go downstairs I fix an awani I fix what are you fixing it with fix breakfast I don't eat until three o'clock I've heard of like I can barely function and I eat like a protein bar on the way to Pilates and talk to Jackson about sports on the way to school it's like very lovely actually I just

don't understand why you're looking at that next summer 2026 i'm not switching kids with you we're not no we are no we are we are i want you to go upstairs to my house and i want you to pull out valley verse and rio out of their cribs and then i want you to get luxem creek dressed i want you to pretend like you're going to pack lunches for school because sometimes i can do it the nickel four depending on what they're getting but um the hot lunch they always get in their their thermos so that part of it can only be in the morning. But sometimes I don't have enough room in my fridge to like put the refrigerated stuff in there and then stick the lunchboxes in there. So I just have to like mentally prepare for like what I'm going to do the next day. So then they sit out on the

counter and then I'm stressed out because they don't want to forget. And then there's juice. And sometimes I don't give them juice. And I'm just thinking about getting everything in the fucking. And then actually the backpacks are too heavy. So the kids are like this. And they're like real fell in the parking lot the other day because he like fell sideways with the backpack. And Like, I just need to see you do it. Like, I just want to watch. I mean, for the experiment, I will do it. Does that sound like the worst thing that I've ever heard in my life?

Also, yes. It's a good time. I mean, I love it for you because you wanted that many children. No, I didn't. Yes, you did. Yes, you did. I didn't want any children. You literally just said a couple of episodes ago that you don't think that you were done having kids.

Yeah, now. But, like, I didn't, I wasn't always that way. Yes, you were. No, I wasn't. Listen, I didn't even want a child. Okay. I just had one, and then I was like, well, if I have one, I have to have siblings. It's like the collections of things that you do.

Am I collecting children? Yes. La boo-boos, it's kids, it's penned. You're a pin collector. You're a bag collector. You are a Stanley collector. I'm not. It's just an accident.

No, it's not. What? Like the breakfast. Like the breakfast. All of those were accidents except one. Okay, I will do it for the experiment. I will tell you the one child thing is actually really nice at his age. I'm sure.

I wake up in the morning and I go into his bedroom. I start his shower. I lay out his clothes for him. Do you do all of that? Let me tell you something. Bring him with water to get him up and going. Elliot gets him, his bus comes at 6.10. No.

He's up and out the door. I will homeschool. for that. No, but he does that all himself. Like, I don't have to wake him up. I don't have to ask him about anything. Like, he literally is up and out the door by himself. Lincoln is just an early riser by nature. Like, Hobby is the same way. And he gets himself up. I don't know if by just by nature, Lux and Creed wake up with him or he wakes him up. I have no idea what goes on upstairs. Everyone comes downstairs ready except for the babies. I don't wait. They all do that themselves? Yes. Oh, wow. See, yeah. But also my kids don't, they shower at night. They don't shower in the morning.

So you start to shower in the morning. Well, he showers before bed, puts on a clean pair of pajamas, and then he wants to shower before school. He's like, it wakes me up. It puts me to sleep. I'm like, I just want to go crawl back into my bed. Oh, no. Once I'm showered, that's a wrap.

Like, I can't, that's great. Like, that's great. Like, I love that. But if I had to wake everybody up individually and then also get them already, I think I wouldn't be here right now. Oh, I know. I'm aware. We would still be getting ready at then 1245.

The next thing that we're going to discuss is, and, And remember this is roommate situation. Pet situation. No, I'm not rooming with anyone that has a pet. It's not happening. No. I don't want my roommate to have a pet. It's the same thing of you not wanting to date men with kids and you have seven.

Like you wouldn't be with a roommate that had a pet? No. What if it was like an axololol? Definitely no. I wouldn't axolto so bad. Why are you looking at everyone? Two years ago, I told you about axelotos. I know.

Two years ago, you called me crazy. and you're talking about wanting an axelotel. Because I researched them. I want a pink one. No. You can't tell me if I can. You're not, it's not aesthetically,

where are you going to put the tank? Who's, who's going to balance the pH? Balancing your own pH is enough work. You don't need to balance an axolato's pH. Then what do you do? They are so hard to care for. How do you know?

I'll take you down here to fucking sicklids, super-sclids, and we can go get one. Well, I can't get it back. I can't point three. getting a fucking axolado you're not getting one what's the question are you just jealous of me yes that's exactly what you're jealous of me yes it is i am jealous of the axolot okay but what was the question who would come home with a stray animal because it needed me i have two answers for this

it would be me but i don't want it do you know what i mean like i'm going to save the animals but i don't want said animals so like i will save the animal so like i will save the animal so now nothing's coming home with me like at my right age of 36 back in the day and I don't know if it was like childhood wounds I love to go to the flea market with my grandparents to like the dog section and if they looked like they were possibly mistreated or wait there was like live dogs at a flea market yeah like just on the outside water the flea market people go and sell them or you know they might have like a free dog sign mark there is jack russell mixed with with docks and at the Amish farm by my house.

Let's go get him. Okay. And I can meet the Amish. I'll take you. No, you won't. She's like, no, you will not. I will ask Popup to take Lincoln to soccer, and we will go. We will go.

Let's just go play with them. Okay, fine. You know, like, we're just be like, hey, we're kind of, it's kind of like going to the pet store, pretending like you're going to get one, but you just, like, go to play with them. Yeah. I love doing that game.

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Who leaves dirty dishes in the sink to soak the longest? this bitch because she doesn't clean anything I did do the dishes this weekend and by doing the dishes that meant loading the dishwasher okay so are you a dishwasher

person all the time or a hand washer? Here's the thing I know that it is more ideal to like rinse your plate and immediately put it in the dishwasher for some reason my household has got accustomed to put in dishes in the sink when we have a fucking dishwasher

I just feel like it's a habit that has to be instilled. Like rinse your plate dishwasher. Because you're already taking it. You're like walking it from somewhere to the sink, right? And then you're just leaving it there to rot. Like why? For what? No, I agree with you.

And I'm not doing that. So then I'll wait until the dishes are up to here and then I put them in the dishwasher. Like it doesn't make sense, but that's what's been happening for. years yeah got it okay well I do not I will tell you like sometimes if I'm rushing around or Jackson's rushing around and we have like cups or something with drinks in it I might empty those out rinse the sink out and just leave the cups there until I get a minute yeah yeah and I'll load it for sure but as far as like plates or something like that that's immediately going into the dishwasher and I will be late going somewhere if the dishes are clean in the dishwasher

turning to unload them and then put something else in there, I'm showing the plate. You're not washing them at all. I'll spill something on the floor and walk right over it for three days. What you mean? Like, so what? Chocolate milk. And then you don't get a napkin or clean, like, you just go? Executive dysfunction. I know, but you don't get any... I get upset about it. I'm upset. And in my head, I want to just fucking figure it out, but I can't. I can't do it. I can't. I spilled my setting powder on the floor in my bathroom. I, like, dropped it, and I have, like, a... Why don't need an extra dyson?

Oh, fuck. When you see that purchase on my bank account, you can explain it to Rebecca and Kristen then. Okay. So I spilled the translucent powder. I dropped it on the chair, so it got on the chair, and then it exploded on the floor. I think it was there for four days. Okay, who is more likely to live with a closed chair for both of us? Oh, what? A closed chair. Like, let's say, like, we had... this chair.

Oh. You're just like clothes on it. I'm pretty sure if you look at my bathroom chair right now because I have like a salon chair. Yeah. There's probably clothes over either my clothes or the kids closed because my kids shower in my bathroom. So they just... That is the messiest part of me is my clothes.

So the other day I put on this outfit, right? It was like black pants and the graphic tea. I had it on for like two hours and then I put it in the bathroom or the closet or whatever. It just like throw it somewhere. Then I put it on the next day because I only wore it for two hours. And then here goes Lux, talking about, didn't he wear that yesterday? Well, I only wore for two hours. I threw it on the chair.

Okay. I get that. But if I have worn anything, like, it immediately just has to go to the wash. And I don't know why I'm like that. Like, if the babies have their pajamas on, like, they do their sets, unless they peed through their diaper, I want them to wear it again. Because why am I, why? I mean, that's the logical thing, I think. If you have an outfit on for two hours, why are you putting it in the wash?

Like, for example. Am I, am I crazy? No, you're not crazy. I'm crazy on this. Okay. Okay. Which one is wiping down counters immediately after cooking? Me. That too. Do you ever wipe down counters? The last time I wiped down a counter was two weeks ago. No, they get wiped down the counter just not by me.

Okay. Like, I physically did it like two weeks ago. But doesn't it make you feel good? No, I hate it. Why? Because I don't like, one, I don't like the feeling of it on my, hands like the shit on my hands and then I also it's like if I sprayed the counter and then it got on my shirt and then I smell like chemicals or like I smell like that or they're like crumbs and

like weird shit get on my shirt and I feel dirty so I don't like to do that I mean I get it I wiped on my counters every day probably a couple times a day you know who is the most like you that I keep thinking about yeah sterling really sterling took a fucking chlorox wipe to the floor the other day when I was there and she's using her foot to like wipe it in front of the me I do that I don't have time for that like it's just going to be dirty in 20 minutes I don't have time for that okay so for example if I have washed a bunch of dishes like let's say I brought in like a grill mat from my grill and it's like larger than my sink so I'm washing stuff and then like water gets on the floor I'm spritsing that down with Mr. Clean on the floor and then I will take a paper towel I will put it on

my foot and I'll do like that around and then throw it in the trash. Because water dripped on the floor? I'm letting that shit dry. See you in a couple hours. I know, but it's going to be a stain. No, it's not. What do I have? LVP, EVP?

It's like like engineered hardwood. So like it doesn't leave like the watermarks that like normal hardwood leaves. I know, but it doesn't bother you just for it to be there existing. Not water. I mean, if chocolate milk doesn't, then water definitely doesn't. More guys should listen to this podcast. They should. Like, I feel like this might be the episode that brings them, you know?

Okay, nighttime vibes. Who falls asleep to the TV and what are they watching? I don't fall asleep to the TV anymore. Me either. But I used to. Me too. And now I can't sleep with it on. So nobody's falling asleep with the TV on.

So a couple of years ago, I heard that it was, just remember back whenever I, like, did not have TV in my room for years. Yeah. Same. At the Middletown House, I never had a TV in my room. Yeah. Because I was like, that was the thought was like not having stimulation.

Yes, that was also my thought. And I also felt like the TV was what ruined my marriage, really. It was just a new world, but I blamed vacuums. Did he watch TV on silent, or was it loud? Just like medium, modern family. And I felt like I had to compete with modern family. So it was like a lovely good time. So then I just never had a TV in my room after I got divorced.

And now I do. I actually watched Golden Girls last night. I love Golden Girls. And then turned it to Y'all. Yeah. Who hogs the blankets on the couch and bed? Me. I have to have a blanket out.

Like all my kids are blanket kids too. Like even Valley this morning was like, and you want a blankie and a blanket. I love it. Jackson's like that too. We've always been a blanket. And we have so many throat blankets, like obsessed with clothes. I have them.

Somebody put them on a hanger. And like you can fold them on a hanger, like fold them over the hanger. So now they're hanging up in the closet Because we have so many That's a good idea No wait really I'll send a picture of it

When I get home later But And that's like the one Like I don't really decorate For like Halloween and stuff But I do have Halloween themed blankets Because I do too But I'm not decorating

But just the throw blankets are enough We know that I don't do Halloween Okay Who is getting up to use the bathroom At 2 a.m. Me Every time I'm holding it

Until it hurts You just don't think about it Like you just lay there and if you're thinking about sleeping, you're not thinking about pain. Last night, I think it was, I thought it was later than it was, but it was like 11 and I'm like in my head. I was just facing the wall and I'm like, get up and pee right now or try to hold it and go later and then eventually just got up to go pee. But I can't. I have to get up. Yeah, I think I just prioritized the sleep over the walk into the toilet, you know? And then it's just immediately, once I get up in the morning, like, I have.

have to be immediately. Right. Okay, next, boundaries and privacy. Where's more struggles? I don't have any. Who barges into the other's room without knocking? Me and my whole family? I feel like we...

Why is that Harry King move? Why is that hearing you do? What are those pink things? I need to step better habits for the kids because I'll just walk right in, but that they also do. We don't really close doors in my house. At all? not really until I can't remember

Do you sleep with the door open or closed? My bedroom? Open. But I know Well I know You said the floor

But Was it you who told me That it's a firehouse It is Yes Murderers Like why does the door Why is the door

Open? First of all If someone's trying to kill you They're coming No matter one At least you have It's a fire hazard It is a fire hazard

But I think about If I open my eyes And someone's in my door no I would rather than just be standing there above me than hear them coming through the door like where I'm going to prepare it's kind of like a car crash like you know what I mean you're driving down the road and if you don't see it coming you're not going to brace or you're probably not going to be as hurt

they say that about drunk drivers as well because they have no like inhibitions so they're just like usually they're fine what I was going to say when you said that you'd rather have them standing over you I've been doing this thing to Valley where I'm like pretend I'm sleeping and she'll go like this and she'll like touch my chest like mommy and I ignore her and then she gets this close to my face and she's just looking at me and then I open my eyes and I'm like that's actually terrifying you're terrifying and traumatizing your daughter no she's terrifying me why are you just close to my face because she thinks you're dead I was just I told her I'm going to take a nap like you're playing dead

no I'm playing sleep that's what I'm doing because I want to sleep I'm like, actually, we could just take it out together. I'm playing sleep. Okay. Who snoops through drawers and bathroom cabinets? I have never been a snooper. I'm not a snooper. At my mom's I was, because I was trying to find my dad.

Wait. I meant that I was looking for clues for where my dad was. So I would snoop through my mom's old purses that she would keep in her closet. What did you think you were going to find the purse? I thought I was going to find a phone number or something, like an address, a phone number, just anything, which I eventually did. but snooping through what I don't know

about me and I really don't want to find things anymore so I'm not snooping because also the fear of getting

caught snooping what have you explain that like I'm more scared of getting caught snooping than I am of the what I'm going to

actually snooping yes see I'm like that too like if somebody ever caught me snooping through their drawers

like what how do you explain I would be more to tell on yourself like on the spot, I catch you snooping. What are you saying to me? Yes, I was snooping. For what?

Are we, like, rolling? Yeah. I was looking for the fine stuff that I didn't know. I don't think I'd be mad at you. I don't be like, what are you supposed to say? If someone walks in and sees you in their fucking drawer? I don't think I, like, I want to, I want to, but I won't because I'm scared. Like, if you're anybody, you'd just shit your pants. No, I truly would get, like, I should just pass out.

I would get bubble guts so bad. Yeah. Like, I want to. I would be lying if I said, I didn't think about it, but, like, the fear of getting caught. But there are people that are, like, us in the world, and then there are people like my ex-husband and my son, who they don't give a fuck. Like, they don't even hide something.

Like, they'll just go through the kitchen, open drawer, like, see what's in it. Go in your bathroom, open drawer, take what's in it. I don't know that that would bother me. Like, I don't really keep it. Like, one time I was, like, a little embarrassed because the cleaning at the time. I'm the housekeeper. Saw your vibrators. Yeah, and there was a lot.

Like, I had... Collection. Over 50 of them. And so, and then one of the whole is, like, this huge, like, suction cup dildo, and it was just like... That's the one that you fuck in the shower. I didn't fuck it in the shower. I didn't. I didn't.

I didn't. It was a thought. Didn't you say that you put it on the shower wall? she did say that didn't she no no no no I was just an idea just an idea

she just tried to escape her body she just left I did I didn't it was just an idea I was just an idea I'll think no but like no

you're just an idea no just an idea Don't worry. That was an intrusive thought. It wasn't intrusive people do that. Making progress with your finances and your financial goals can be such a headache. It could be because of overdraft fees, missed payments, or just wishing you had ways to save more.

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Chime feels like progress. Oh, the next one is very relevant to what's going on right now. Who shares too much info the second thing walk in the door? Kaylin Ray Lowry. Me? Yes. That's also my ADHD. Oversharing.

I feel like I share, overshare in times that I should not overshare and then don't share it all when I should be. I would agree. I think I do the same. What do I mean? I don't think I would do the same, right? I do the same.

It's how you just share. Like, you'll try to, like, be sneaky, and then choose, I'm going to say to you, like, I did the same. Okay. I don't want someone to call me out before I call myself out. It's like, in case someone finds out that I had the dildo under the sink. It's like, I might as well just tell everyone just in case they saw it. But why would someone be under your sink?

That's a great question. You know what I mean? it's like who's who's looking those places right that's a down the race and the last zero so okay next we have listener submissions can't wait how do you deal with having a short fuse with your kids i have a four year old and my patience is literally non-existent i fly out the needle so quickly i feel terrible about it after but i can't get myself regulated sometimes i get over stimulated so quickly and worry she will remember me or yelling at her i feel like a horrible mother this always happens like when your kids have a bad day and you self reflect like once you get by yourself and think about it oh self reflect right away and i'm like oh like the guilt is so heavy and i always and i feel bad too especially with the beginning of this school year because creeds just starting kindergarten and for anyone who has a child going to kindergarten next year or maybe this is your first year it's been really difficult because they're in this like box all day essentially and then um he's so

hired when he gets home. Sometimes he's fallen asleep in the car from the school to home. He is melting down and then I'm getting frustrated, but he had a long day. This is still new for him. He hasn't even been in kindergarten for a full day for a month yet. And so I completely can resonate with that. I don't know what the solution is and I don't know because also if she doesn't have a partner to help pick up where she is meeting a minute, like that's also hard. So I I don't have. I just feel like this is generally like part of parents, whether you have a partner or whether you don't play.

Well, it's like the conversation that we had a while back where it's like we could take our kids to every country in the world and they still may remember the times that we flipped out at them versus the time we took them to Disney World or the other country or whatever. So that's really hard. And I get it. Speaking of kindergarten and being exhausted in the day, you know, Jackson took a nap until the middle of first grade. like when he got home

well and creed still gets like the pink eyebrows which is like a regular sign of being overtired for babies but he still gets that I don't know if it's because he has more fair skin I can see it and so by like when we're home by like four between four and five he's got pink eyebrows

he's literally ready for bed but I can't put him to bed I just even if Jackson did not take a nap whenever he got home from school it was immediately remember I used to make him shower when he got home to backpack like not coming in the house no shoes in the house I remember get kindergarten off of you take a nap lay in the bed you can watch TV I don't care but it's going to be like individual

quiet time for you to regulate yourself I don't know that there's a way for me to do that with Creed only because there's so many kids and then we have to do homework either right when we get home or it's not getting done so speaking of homework our elementary school does or did a no homework policy as a parent how do you feel about that i agree with it it's hard because like on one hand i agree with it because our kids are in these boxes all day and even though they're 15 20 minutes of recess is not enough um and so i i struggle with it because we're also expected to have our kids in all kinds of after school activities like sports and family time but we only i would say like a traditional mostly traditional family you're seeing your

partner and your kids for two hours a day i know with school and And then sports or whatever activities, Lutz has tutoring and sports, like all kinds of things like that. But then on the other hand, when you look at other countries and things like that, they're getting so much done and they have a completely different structure. And I don't, but I don't know if they're going home with homework, right? Like, are they doing so much intense work during the day that they don't have homework and they're able to go do stuff? But other countries seem to be like light years ahead of us. So I don't know. I will say I love the idea of no homework and just focus on family time once school was over.

but it actually kind of backfired once he got in middle school because now the workload is so much more and the expectation is so much higher that he doesn't really know how to manage homework as a six-year because he never had it from kindergarten to fit. I can see that. It's sort of like, I don't know if you, when you were growing up or when you transitioned into college,

I grew up from sixth grade on having block scheduling, so I always had 90-minute classes from sixth grade to the time I graduated. Yeah. Some schools don't do that. They have eight, nine, ten periods a day all the way up through high school. And when you get to college, some of your classes are 90 minutes. Yeah. So like it's hard when you're having that much like coursework during the day or during that class. And then you have to go home and still do homework. Like it's rough. We did it like what you're talking about. Oh, you did. Okay. Yeah. I don't think Elliot has that. Elliot's in 10th grade and I think he has eight periods. Or six, something like that. Yeah. Okay. Next question. How are we connecting with family and bridge? these days standing appointments for dinner planning outings what works best for y'all no no plan i don't ever want to have a plan even though i'm very type a because i never want to do anything i don't have a plan um my one of my friends um her mom is so funny and she has a standing every single Thursday she goes to dinner with her sisters just her and her sisters and i always thought that was so like fun and cool i don't think even if i had a standing appointment it would ever work

work. Like I don't even know if my schedule would, no day looks the same for me. Even on a day that I don't, even on a week that I don't have my kids, no day looks the same. So I don't think standing appointments would ever work. Like I'm trying to plan out when to go to that restaurant y'all told me about. And I'm thinking two weeks ahead. Like I don't have time to like just have a standing situation. I always used to laugh at Will's mom because she is very southern traditional. And I always used to think it was so funny. Will it would be like, oh, my mom's going to a luncheon with two of her girlfriends. And I'm like, oh, okay, thinking, oh, she'll be back, you know, like an hour. No, they go for like three and four hours, like doing this. And they do it weekly or monthly or what? Like monthly with some friends. It's like every other month. And it's like three and four hour things.

Yeah. And while I wish I could be her, I'm like, that is such an investment into your friend. and your relationship I don't want to do that I like the idea of that yeah like especially like Alessandra and Kristen both live out of the state you live out of the state like that makes sense to me

but it's just not try even just trying to get to Becky's a couple weeks ago Kristen called me and was like Lincoln has a double header on Saturday how are you going to Becky's on Friday and then his games are at nine and then he has games on Sunday

all the kids have games on Sunday like it sounds good but I like also am thinking once school starts like there's no time for me to even do that if I wanted to. I think that there's a time and a place for certain kind of friendships and I think it's very true that

when you become parents that your life and your world changes you know and I do think eventually we can get back to a place where it's like okay I can allow myself to be able to go and do that for an hour and a half but now it's just not

conducive for me with one child I don't have him half of the week because we'll have him half the week so this is more sustainable for me to be able to do but you're not doing it yeah yeah it's not conducive for you at all at all and unfortunately that's all we have time for for doing stupid shit that we were just doing and we have out play okay please make sure this is anonymous when I was 21 there was a guy my best friend and I met at Cabellas since it was Cabellas no truly since it was Cabellas we thought he would be a country boy because those were the boys I was attracted to. I couldn't have been more wrong about that. He was a pretty boy at Cabellas. Yeah. Anyway, we exchanged numbers and

later that night he came with her and I to a bonfire. After the fire, she drove and we made out in the back seat. We messed around a few times, but it was never give and take. However, I was 21. It was so inexperienced. I thought he liked me, so I would just go with it. And he started pressuring me to give him a blowjob, but I had never done. They all do that. All guys pressure for BJ's? Yeah, what is it about blowjobs? They're not fun to give and they're not, I can't imagine they're better than sex. Do you feel like oral's better than sex? No. That's unfortunate. Do you think oral's better than sex? It depends on who's doing it. Okay. But I had never done that with a boy up to that point, but I finally agreed. So one night around 9.30 in the dead of winter,

I picked him up and we parked behind a local pool that I had worked at at the time. His mom was visiting, so we didn't want to do it there, and there were no security cameras at the pool, so I knew no one would see me giving him a blowjob in my car. I had conditions and I told him not to come in my mouth because I gagged so easily and I don't like certain textures. So what does this fool do? He comes in my mouth. Finally, after so much time of hanging out and realizing he was a selfish motherfucker,

I made him get out of my car and made him walk home. Years later, after I got a master's degree and he's been arrested so many times, we saw each other I love the casual and he was arrested so many times like I love that extra detail that was truly I needed that we saw each other at the grocery store he chose to blame me and told me that night was when he became a criminal wait now I get it he chose to blame me and told me that night was when he became a criminal I'm so hard I spit out my Starbucks coffee and told him I had one rule I have no remorse okay so I now I get it I now get it but we're she was saying, we messed around a few times

so it was never a give and take. She meant like she was the giver and he was the taker. And never was reciprocated, yeah. Do you feel like if you give a blowjob and you immediately need oral? Like, is that a thing? Now we're getting to a conversation of like... This is the best... I love this storytelling right here. Like, I loved it.

Yeah. Also, same. I really liked the offspring conversations that were about to have. so I appreciate this anonymous person however that's getting into a conversation of like 69 and that's just not a vibe I feel like

it's childish yeah it is you know and it's like I feel like to do 69 properly you need to be roughly around the same size as the other person is that true I can convert me short it's yeah

there's just too much going on I don't like 69. I don't ever want to do 69. People with ADHD, like, it's a pointless position because if you... Specifically for ADHD, it's a pointless position. It is, because if you're focusing on... Just for the neurodiversions. No, because I'll have the dick in my mouth, and then if he, like, hits a spot, I'd be like,

and it's like, now I'm inhaling your cock. Like, what do I mean? That's what I'm saying. Like, you can't focus evenly on being pleasured and pleasuring. Yeah, I would agree. You know? And so for the neurodivergent community, it's just... The neurodivergent community?

Raise your hand if your neurodiverts. Bring your hand if you're neurodivergent. I got both of them. It's poor people. There's too much going on. There is too much going on. No, but what I meant was, like, okay, say you go to, like, you're going to bed. Yeah.

You all are around to do the hanky-panky. Yeah. And during coitus, you have... What did you just say? What did you just say? Oh, my goodness. You know that I learned. Who's biology class?

No, I learned that. I learned that word on the big bang. Sheldon Cooper. So, Coydus, and you're, he's going down on you. Yeah. Do you feel, or does he make you feel, or does he want a blowjob after that? Because I don't, I feel like there's a way to reciprocate without a being at the same time. Like, I don't mean you to go down on me because I sucked your dick today.

Like, we can do that another day and it'll be the same. Yes. Like it's even. I'm in complete. with that. Okay. I'm glad. I'm glad. Okay. That is all, kitties. If you have not followed us on the podcast, make sure you do that from any podcast platform wherever you get your pod. Always first at podcast one. We hope that you guys have a great week and we'll talk to you soon. See ya. die in seven days scream and from dusk till dawn this is my kind of place and don't miss the man-made

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