Coffee Convos with Kail Lowry and Lindsie Chrisley - Trust, Lawsuits & Therapy

Episode Date: December 12, 2024

CC387: Kail can't wait to get her boob job and Lindsie recounts the time she went to ask her Todd for her own boob surgery. A tiktok about a woman calling off her wedding after a wild bachelor party turns out to actually be the best thing the bride could have done. Too many lawsuits that are breaking Lindsie and Kail's hearts.. Chipotle and Kraft Mac and Cheese??? Also, someone asks AITAH and another person doesn't know if they're crossing the line when it comes to their friend's kid. Today's Foul Play is shrooms gone wrong.. Thank you to our sponsor! Better Help: This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/coffee today to get 10% off your first month. DraftKings: Download the DraftKings Casino app and sign up with promo code COFFEE Kiwico: Get 50% off your first crate at kiwico.com, promo code COFFEE Progressive: Visit Progressive.com to learn more! Qualia: Go to Qualialife.com/coffeeconvos for up to 50% off and use code COFFEECONVOS at checkout for an additional 15% off

I hate gift giving and receiving. Receiving gifts is so weird. What do you say thank you? This is Coffee Convo's with Kale Lowry and Lindsey Chrisley. I really want you to be in your feels Kale. That does not interest me whatsoever. I feel very attacked by you. A spirited discussion about motherhood, friendship, family and life in the public eye.

I'm just not with the fakery anymore. There's a fakery bakery around here. Here's Kailin Lindsay. Good morning and welcome back to another episode of Coffee Convo's. I'm glad to see that you are on American soil. I have never been happier to be on American soil. I did not love Madrid. I hate that for you. I hate that for you. Yeah, my kids had a great time. They were just happy to be there, but I was counting down the days to be back here in

Delaware. I absolutely hate going places that I think I'm going to like and then I end up hating them. It's the worst because then you need a vacation from your vacation. And also if you take your kids somewhere, you need a vacation from that vacation. It was a wild ride. I'm glad Lincoln got the experience. I'm glad Lux and Creed got to go to the Royal Palace. And I'm thankful every single day that I was able to pay for the trip in and of itself, but happy to be back. Don't plan on leaving American soil for a

long time. And just ready for the holidays. You know what I mean? Is your travel shut down for the year? No. I still have two more places to go before 2025. Oh, I'm shut down. I wish I was shut down.

I have a big interview coming up this weekend for Barely Famous Podcast. And then I am getting a boob job at the end of the month. Are you so excited? I'm so excited. I did my pre-op call yesterday and we went over all the medication, all the things, all the details, sent my inspo pics, and I'm ready to be a much smaller version of myself in 2025. Wait. So when I, I don't know if this is the same for anybody else who's had their boobs done

But when it came time for me to get mine done, I don't know if I've ever told you the story about this Did I I don't think so? Okay, so This is like circa 2012 2013, okay I go to my dad crying. And I'm like, I don't know what happens whenever you have a baby and I understand that you can't relate.

And he's like, I can, I shit out five kids. And I'm like, no, no. Tried to breastfeed, did that for roughly like six months. And then I don't know where my boobs went. Like I had boobs before I started breastfeeding And then like everything went to the bottom like I had nothing up top. Yeah So I'm like, what the fuck is this? Yeah, who is this girl? So I went to him crying and I was like, I feel like there is no other answer than

Implants and what did he say? He was like, alright, took me to the doctor. Yeah, did a whole episode on Chrisley Knows Best. He delivered me a boob cake before my surgery. Not the boob cake. He was there for the entire time. Pretty miserable experience honestly with a film crew. Mm-hmm. So be happy that that's not going on, but I don't regret it at all. Oh, I want my boobs to look like yours. I should have sent you as the inspo pic. I should have been like because they asked me to send them like up to three photos. I should have sent them you.

I should have been like make them like my co-host. You want me to send you a nude? Imagine I'm like, hey, by the way, I like these tits, like, and send them. They would be like, this is somebody that I personally know. Okay, so when it got time for like the console, I think I had two consoles.

I went in the first time to like assess everything and then I had to go back in and they give you like porno magazines. For what? To look through to see like which boobs that you like and which like, you're supposed to go through and pick the things that you like out of each of the boobs so that they can like zone in.

Oh, okay. Well, I sent three variations of Khloe Kardashian because I was like, she's five foot 10 and I'm five foot eight. And so I think she probably has like a similar build. I don't know how she got as thin and fit as she is outside of like surgeries and probably the gym, but like- No trauma. The trauma.

The trauma. So- Good morning to everybody but Tristan Thompson yet again. Why? What happened with Tristan Thompson? I don't know. I just saw some rumors online that they were reconciling or attempting to reconcile and then something else like surfaced and I'm like, are we shocked?

Nobody's shocked. Poor Chloe. Like, I mean, she just wants, she's really unproblematic, like truly unproblematic. But what is the answer of going back to the drawing board with the same person? If they've cheated on you, like, do you ever go back? Like you don't give them a second chance

or you keep going back and they keep doing the same things? Like what? Unfortunately for some people, I know that there are certain people who are like, one and done, you cheat on me, I'm out. But then I think there are other people that need to hit a certain wall before they actually walk away for good. And I was one of those people that stuck around for a really long time. But speaking of Khloe

Kardashian, she was actually just in the media because her therapist allegedly leaked information about their therapy sessions. Wait, what? Yeah, and I was like, what would Lindsay do? So it says that leaked information about their therapy sessions. What? Yeah, and I was like, what would Lindsay do? So it says that Khloe Kardashian has opened up about her former counselor allegedly breaching doctor-patient privilege

amid her divorce from Lamar Odom. So in a new interview, she says, this is in Bustle Magazine, by the way, she just posted that on her Instagram. I remember I was going to therapy and the next thing I knew, someone private, something private I told my therapist was on a tabloid. I knew that my therapist discloses information to a tabloid

because there's no way this could have gotten out there. Could you imagine? Because the therapist probably thought she was slick and was like, oh, she's probably telling her friends, like, this is fair game for me to go make a quick buck. The way that I would sue so hard. Not sue. We don't sue people around here anymore.

We know how that works out. She said, I stopped going to therapy and started going to the gym. I needed a release, but I didn't trust anybody else anymore. And the place that I felt the safest was the gym. That is so traumatic to have like a therapist out you on shit. There are certain things that I tell people and I'm sure you're the same way.

Like there are certain parts of your life that you go to certain friends for and then there are certain parts of your life that you like specifically save for therapy. And 2025, I sent you a screenshot earlier today with a conversation with someone, not gonna disclose like who it is, but I just made a determination after, and it truly did not come until after Chattanooga, our trip to Chattanooga. They're like, I'm just gonna address everything head on.

I also have felt that that's honestly best case scenario is just saying exactly what you mean, when you mean it, how you mean it. And if someone else's feelings get hurt, it's like, you know, your intentions were not to hurt the other person. It's just to be very clear and very direct because we're not getting anywhere by beating around the bush. Like we're not getting anywhere by holding our feelings in. And honestly, there's nothing that makes me more irritated than when I ask someone, like if I have a feeling that something is going on or like maybe they have certain feelings about something I did and I ask you and you say, Oh, nothing, oh, nothing, oh, nothing. And you sort of beat around the bush. And then two weeks later, you're coming to me and saying, well, you did X,

Y, and Z. Okay, well, now it's not the time and place I asked you two weeks ago. That's not my problem now. And you need to figure out how to deal with this because I came to you directly and gave you an opportunity to speak up. And I've had to walk on eggshells for the past two weeks after you told me no, nothing was wrong. I would rather you hurt my feelings in the moment when I'm asking you, then for you to come back to me two weeks later, after you said everything was fine, and then tell me all the

things that I've been doing wrong wrong or I've done to hurt your feelings. I'm not operating that way and neither should other people and I need everyone collectively, we're in our 30s now, to get behind that. I think that that needs to be like a goal for 2025 only having honest conversations and addressing things when they need to appropriately be addressed. I understand people needing time to like process something, but if you have someone coming to you directly saying, hey, what's the deal? And then they act like there is no problem.

And then weeks later, come back to the drawing board and say something, absolutely not. Because I gave you the platform and the time to be able to address it. If you weren't ready to have a conversation about it, that's one thing I think saying, okay, this is what I feel, but I'm not ready to have a conversation about it. I'll let you know when I'm ready to have a conversation. Then the ball bounces back to your court for you to decide, okay, I'm either gonna have it or I'm not 100% 100. I actually just had that conversation with Kristin this morning before we got on here because I was like, obviously, we're coming to a close 2024, you know, it's

ending in 2020 2025 is beginning. There's a lot of things a lot of moving parts that you know, are are the wheels are sort of set in motion. And so I said to her, well, I need to go do x, Y, and Z. And I need to go directly to the source, like about like some of the concerns that I'm having and that they don't need to be abrasive conversations. They don't need to be rude.

They don't need to be emotionally charged. Just like, hey, this is what I'm feeling X, Y, and Z. This is all on a business, like on a business note. Like these are not personal feelings. Just like, let's talk about it and we'll move forward or we won't. No, I 100% agree with that, but back to the comment about the therapist.

What do you think about couples therapy? I think it can, I think that couples therapy can work for people who are both committed to making it work. And when both parties are in a place where they're willing to take accountability at the same time, I think that a lot of times couples will go to couples therapy and one person is actually not receptive

or willing to take accountability and that doesn't work. Like you cannot, the other thing too, I think, and I don't know that this is just a man thing, I think it can be women too, like saying that they're willing to take accountability but they're actually not taking accountability, that's not helpful either. So I really think that couples therapy is sort of, I don't want to call it a scam, but it's not going to work for a lot of people because they're not actually where they say they are at in terms of like accountability, accepting responsibility,

understanding that someone else's perspective in the relationship actually matters. And you do have to take accountability when someone perceives something a certain way because you're both being weighed down by that. No, I agree with that. I also think just from my experience, which I don't have a ton of

experience with couples therapy, which I could say that I did. I think a lot of people wait until it's way too late to start it. Yep. Like the problems are already so deep and the resentment is there is so much resentment that is built up that you thinking you're going to couples therapy and it's going to be resolved in one session, you're setting yourself up for failure. I also think that you need to be clear with your partner. Don't care if you're married in a relationship, whatever, because some people just genuinely don't believe in therapy.

They really, really don't. And I've experienced that firsthand, like where I'm like, okay, let's go to therapy then. But to your point about going when it's entirely too late, I think the flip side of that is like literally going starting therapy when maybe there's miscommunication, like regular miscommunications, regular misunderstandings, because you're going to figure out how to fix that and also start to build a tool set for future issues. But when you're waiting until there's, you know,

a whole premarital affair for nine months, that's not not premarital affair, extra marital affair for nine months. Marital affair, I hope not. That's you're you're already fucked. like I'm not saying you can never come back from it but the chances of you coming back from that and speaking of extramarital affairs oh god it's the most wonderful time of year holidays on the house at DraftKings casino with this season's offerings you'll unwrap everything on your list exclusive games huge jackpots

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Percentual savings will vary, discounts not available in all states and situations. I was inspired, I don't know if you know who Reb Maisel is. She's an attorney on TikTok that I'm obsessed with. She's so fucking funny. But she, she posted this video on her TikTok that got like millions and millions and millions of views. And she's basically talking about a bachelor party and a bachelorette party that were had on the same night in different places. And basically what happened was the guys go to a strip club for the bachelor party. And the groom went in the back room got a lap dance but

did not hook up with the stripper. It was just a lap dance. And I say just a lap dance pretty loosely because I know that different people have different expectations when it comes to strip clubs. But the the soon to be wife ended up calling off the the wedding. And I wanted to know your thoughts on it, but I do think Kristin should play the video so that you have like the full context of the story.

Yeah, I want the whole context. And I feel like you're gonna love Reb, she's so funny. That is not my drama or my friend's drama, but friends of friends drama that has kept me up at night since I heard about it over the weekend amazing Perfect gorgeous. Okay, so let me set the scene one of our guy friends goes up to a group of my friends Okay, and says hey Hypothetically, would you call off the wedding if your fiance at his bachelor party?

Got a private dance from from a stripper at a strip club, but didn't hook up with her Okay, and immediately my best friend clocked it she was like that sounds hyper specific who did this happen to this is not a hypothetical who did this happen to and he said okay you don't know them but I'll tell you the story and then you can tell me what you think okay you know anything and at that point the story had ended there okay with like oh he didn't cheat on her did it up okay but this is the story the two people these two people had been dating for eight years. Okay.

Fiance's, you know, they were in love. Everyone said they were long-term. It was the only people that they'd ever been with. And by the time they got engaged and were about to be married, they were in their late 20s. So it wasn't like a 23 year old immature situation. Okay. They were, they were cooked and ready to go.

So they had their bachelor and bachelor parties on the same weekend in the same city. They were all in Miami. Okay. Um, just to show like, yeah, like their friend groups are so intertwined and like they were so comfortable with that. Right. So he goes to a strip club, the bachelor party goes to a strip club and she knew about that, knew that they were going. Okay. So that wasn't the issue. He gets somehow a private dance with a stripper at the strip club. Um club and she finds out about it and gets really really mad and calls up the wedding. It's like no. But she believed him and everyone agreed that he didn't cheat on her. Okay? He didn't cheat on her. There was something physical

that happened. It was just like a private dance from a stripper at a strip club. And personally, okay, complete aside, I am not down for guys bachelor parties, like my fiance, going to a strip club or having strippers at a bachelor party. I know that it can be a joke, fun, ha, funny laugh, like it's part of the culture, it's part of the thing we do, but I just, I think it's sinister, I don't like it,

I wouldn't be comfortable with it, but I know a lot of people are, and I know a lot of really devoted, amazing husbands totally have strippers at their bachelor party, party okay it doesn't mean that you're immediately shitty but like right most guys at that point honestly have probably been to a strip club and if you haven't amazing but like it's you know that was kind of the gist that that our guy friend was getting at of throwing out this hypothetical as he was thinking okay isn't that a little it's a little much right to to call off the entire wedding after eight years of like an amazing relationship

And this was the only thing that had happened and like he didn't cheat on her all this stuff Okay, and of course the entire wedding party, okay Tens of thousands of dollars lost on this wedding probably giving her so much shit for it mind you I thought the whole time i'm like he had to have cheated there's no way they're like no she even agrees like no He didn't cheat all of this fucking flak and heat for it. Okay, because she was too dramatic. She like broke up with him fully, okay? One month, one month after she calls off the wedding, he starts dating the stripper.

Dating the stripper. Apparently they had exchanged numbers at the private lap dance. Now mind you, he does not live in Miami. He doesn't live there, okay? He's not from there, he had never met this girl before, he had never been to this strip club before. Starts dating the stripper. When I say dating the stripper one month later, I mean like full on the grid photos on Instagram, captions that are like Nirvana with you, devoted, like my love of my life with this girl. Okay, and you're probably thinking immediately

Well, what are these? What do these characters look like? He is not worth all this trouble I'm gonna tell you right now. They rarely fucking are but like he looks like the main character from a bugs life period Okay, these two women are Shockingly beautiful like I saw photos and I was like, holy fuck, and I'm not just saying that. They look like Instagram models, but aren't Instagram models. Like I was like, oh my God, like they're just like stunningly beautiful. They both look the fucking same.

They both look alike. They could be sisters. Yup. Yeah. Help. Oh my God. Yeah. I cannot imagine the vindication

that the ex-fiance had of being like period like not that that isn't also horribly upsetting to hear but I know that she was in every fucking group chat two middle fingers up to every aunt who was giving her shit and was like I clocked the tea before it was brewed thoughts. Okay. Number one we've talked about before that I do not like bachelor or bachelorette parties. That's number one. I think it completely negates the entire idea of a marriage.

Really quick to touch on that. What would you, for like a bachelor, bachelor at weekend, what would you like to see instead of that? Like maybe like an Airbnb, go to dinner with the girls, go to the beach, do something like that? Yeah, like a spa day, something that is not like any type of trouble. I just feel like that's setting the situation off on the wrong foot. So like maybe like a wine and paint situation, a beach, spa day, love that. I actually really love that. I think that a lot of people

see it as like their last time as like a single person. But to me, you're already in a committed relationship. I don't really care one way or another. And Elijah has never expressed interest in going to strip clubs. So I don't necessarily care. But a woman knows, right? Like this fiance knew that whether he cheated or not something was up or she wouldn't have called off the entire eight year relationship in the marriage. I 100% agree with that. Back to the point that you said like last two raw and single. You're not single. Like I don't know who made that idea up, but you're not single. You are in a committed relationship and are committing to what should be a lifetime relationship, right?

Yeah. So us doing this last little hoorah, like what? You need to get your rocks off like one more time before you're married. That does not make sense to me. I don't like it. I'm not co-signing it. Find a fucking hobby that's not a strip club.

I do not like strip clubs. I do not like any part of that industry at all. I also don't like the private room situations. The stories that I have heard from people personally of situations that go on in Atlanta strip clubs is absolutely insane. There's like this one swingers one where you go into these private rooms, they have everything that you need, like all the protection, lube, toys, like all this stuff.

You have to be a member to go to this place. And they have people there that will swing with you that are employed by this place and they have people there that will swing with you, that are employed by this place. And then you can also like meet other swinger couples that are there and you all go into a room, like do that whole shebang, whatever. Also not fond of that, not my lifestyle, if it's yours, I'm not judging you, I'm just saying, I don't like it. And to your other point, she knew her man.

So like it probably was something very out of character for him to like go to those links to do that. So that's why you would call off an eight year relationship. And wouldn't you rather call off an eight year relationship before you walk down the aisle than have to navigate through a divorce process? I mean there would have been something that must have sparked between the stripper who gave the lap dance and him to have dated a month later so if they would have gone through with the wedding and gotten married he likely would have

not been able to fight the temptation between him and the stripper moving forward, especially when they pursued a relationship a month later. And who's to say, like, truly, my, my guards are up at this point. Who's to say that he didn't meet her before going to that strip club and was like, I'm going to come see you at work kind of deal for my bachelor party. And then, you know, shit hit the, like, we don't know. That is very true. I didn't even think about that part of it. And I also think that it's strange that there obviously was some type of initial immediate, like physical attraction to that girl.

If the video that you just had Kristen play. She says that they look alike. Yeah, you do what you were doing. You knew you. Somebody found this girl on Instagram, found out where she worked and then took you to that strip club because you don't just coincidentally coincidentally go into a strip club and find this fiance look alike and act like you've never, like, no, absolutely not. Absolutely not. All right, your life goals in your career

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going to hell. Okay. I have an ex like that. They're going to hell and And they hang out with them, they text them, ask them to do things that you would not approve of within your relationship. Like what happens to those friendships? Do they just naturally drop off because you don't want to be controlling and be like, oh, you can't be friends with so and so.

I think in healthy, mature relationships, those are the types of relationships, those are the types of friendships that sort of get put on the back burner. They no longer become a priority. And in really unhealthy and toxic relationships, the spouse of someone that is in the relationship probably frequently goes out with them and either is surrounded by things that he shouldn't be surrounded with or he also acts with the surrounding people. What do you feel about, let's say your man that is claimed all this commitment to you and his single guy friends are sending pictures of girls to group text. See, I don't like that's not respectable to me.

Like, also, I just what is that whole culture, right? Like the guys like what am I trying to say in the girls in the group chats that we have, right? Like you and I are in several group chats together. I'm in girl group chats, you know, we're not sending guys like we're all sort of we're all in relationships. We're not still sending hot guys, right? Like that's just like not something that we care about.

So to me, it just, it shows a lack of maturity in the man and in the men that are in group chats, grown ass men that are sending each other pictures of women and things like that. Like to me, that is just so immature. Like you don't have any other hobbies. You don't have anything else to talk about. You don't have any other interests.

You don't have anything to offer other than- An absolute loser. Like that should probably die out mid-20s to early-30s, right? Like at some point that should sort of subside. I was trying to think about like our group chats. I don't believe that ever have we ever sent pictures of a hot man other than the Menendez brothers.

No, I agree. Like I cannot think of a time. Maybe like an actor in a movie, something like if there's a movie coming out would be like the only exception to movie, something like if there's a movie coming out would be like the only exception to that role or like a singer that comes out with a new song, something like that. Oh, like Riley Green. So yeah, so it's like connected directly to like another conversation. Yes.

But to just send like random and like, that's both when we've been single and in relationships, like that's just not something that we regularly ever talk about and across the board for all my friend groups like we just don't. It's so insane and I also feel like the level of disrespect like you know somebody or multiple people in that group chat are in committed relationships. You need to take that shit to your therapist like to your friends that you need to take that shit to your face, like to your friends that you need to have a single friend group chat like group chat going on. But doing it while and and some people when they hear this, they're going to be like, well, if your

relationship is secure, it shouldn't be an issue. No, it's about boundaries and respect. I would agree. I there's a lot of things that I feel like you and I have a lot of different opinions and views on but this is one of them right like I trust Elijah I don't think that he ever really looks at and he might he's still human right like I'm sure he finds other women attractive I don't give a fuck but like in any of his group, I can guarantee you that nobody is sending pictures of women. Like, it's just like not the time and the place.

I think that they also, Elijah surrounds himself with people who respect the fact that he is in a committed relationship. I would hope that the people that he surrounds himself with respects the fact that he's in a committed relationship in its entirety. Like it's disrespectful to him for people to do it if they were doing it, but it's also disrespectful to you and to your entire family.

I would agree. I would agree with you. I would love to know what other people think and other news. I'm upset. Why are you upset? Okay, do you remember like back in the day, this was back when I was still married that I used to eat Chipotle like

a burrito bowl like every single day? Yeah. Okay. So I see this article pop up saying that Chipotle is facing a lawsuit for serving inconsistent portion sizes. Okay, that's a class action lawsuit right there. And they should also be, have a class action lawsuit against the quality of the meat that they serve because the quality of their chicken is literally rubber. Did you know that Chipotle was owned by McDonald's?

No. Yeah. No, I didn't. Do you like McDonald's chicken or Chipotle chicken better? Neither. I like Nea double cheeseburger ad mac sauce, but I'm not a McDonald's chicken lover. I'm not a Chipotle lover. I just think the quality of the meat in Chipotle is actually trash. Okay, well back to the double cheeseburger situation. I'm going to need you to stop eating it until the recall is like done because there was some type of like

salmonella situation. I saw this on tik tok where multiple people have died from consuming double cheeseburgers. So I don't know if it's like area specific or if it's just like all McDonald's but I'm boycotting until I know that I'm not going to die. I actually haven't had McDonald's in a long time. So I'm boycotting until I know that I'm not going to die. I actually haven't had McDonald's in a long time. So I'm not worried, but. So this says a few months ago,

Chipotle went viral on social media for all of the wrong reasons. The Mexican fast food chain faced major criticism from its customers for serving skimpy food portions in burrito bowl orders. This has become a viral TikTok trend. Some users alleged that they would receive larger portions of food at Chipotle if they

filmed employees making their orders. This alleged hack caused frenzy at Chipotle locations across the country as customers participated in testing out this theory. Chipotle later denied the practice, insisting that portion size were generous at its restaurants. Weeks later, Wells Fargo analysts released a study which confirmed the portion sizes at Chipotle restaurants do indeed vary significantly. The analysts visited eight Chipotle locations in New York City and found some of the locations served burrito bowls that weighed 33% more than what they received at others.

33% is a big fucking deal. We're not talking like 5%, you know, 10% a lot. 33% is wild. So it says, as a result of this controversy, Chipotle is now facing a class action lawsuit filed on November 11th from one of its shareholders for allegedly misleading investors about its portion sizes. Okay.

So it's saying that the shareholders claim that so this isn't like consumers. This is a class action lawsuit from shareholders in Chipotle saying that the investor suffered significant losses and damages as the controversy over portion sizes causes caused Chipotle stock price to fall by 7.86%. Well, good for them. I'm glad they're staying on top of it. Jock wins again. I just need to tell you that this is absolutely true.

Like as an avid Chipotle visitor, sometimes you go and you feel like you're carrying a dumbbell when you leave in your bag. And sometimes you go and you're like, did I get a kid's meal? Yeah, no, 100%. I think that's across the board for a lot of fast food restaurants is like the stock price fell less than the discrepancy in portions. Clearly, that's crazy. It's upsetting too, because I think places like Subway and other like sandwich make Jersey mics, they do the same thing. They embellish. I mean, even McDonald's does it like different. They embellish the way that it looks and then it's different, you know, compared to what you get and then compared to the next person. Right. But Chipotle has the craziest discrepancies I've ever seen.

Okay. But why would they not just do like measuring cups as their It takes too much time. Bounds. Takes too much time. I don't really care because when I go, I feel offended if I'm not getting what I'm wanting. Also, I'm pissed off at advertising when I look at McDonald's and I see that chicken, double Big Mac chicken sandwich shit that they had going on

and it is not what it looks like. I mean, while they're making these changes going into 2025, hopefully they settle the lawsuit, I really hope that they up their quality of the meat. I'm not sure that that's gonna happen. But I don't really have a problem with the quality of the of the meat. So you don't feel like you get like that rubbery, grisly? No, that's how I feel. I mean, the barbacoa is not as

bad, but the chicken I just I don't trust it. I could just remember when we were in LA and I ordered Chipotle and you were like that stinks so bad. Yeah, it smells horrible. There's no flavor to it. Like what is the flavor of it? It's nothing but flavor. There's no flavor to it. Okay, I need to know people who are listening to this if Chipotle is flavorful, or if it's bland, because Will claimed when we were married that the reason that we had problems at

dinner was because Jackson and I both have bland taste palates. So maybe it is bland, but I feel like it's flavorful. No, it's fake flavor. It's not real. This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. And we talk about a lot of things that we recommend therapy for. And if you are one of those people that you feel like was impacted by any of our statements,

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Find comfort this December with BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com slash coffee today to get 10% off your first month. That's better help. H E L P dot com slash coffee. Okay, so I need to read this listener topic. It's am I the asshole? Can't wait. You know, at any point that you're having to ask if you're the asshole, you probably are, but we're gonna roll with this. My husband cannot communicate, literally cannot put words to paper

to write me a birthday card. I suggested therapy and he agreed. This was four months ago. I've seen a psychiatrist twice and have been switching up meds. I'm so depressed for absolutely no reason and cannot snap out of it. I still spend every minute

trying to be everything for everyone. Well, that's the first problem. I've been asking him once a week for the past roughly three months if he has made a therapy appointment and it's always met with an excuse. I asked him again yesterday and he said that he had his appointment last Wednesday, six days, six days prior, I feel like this validated my concerns about our inability to have a conversation of substance and I'm upset. There's just like a lot going on with this situation. Yeah. Right. No, there's a lot going on in this situation. And I just, I mean, therapy would have been a great option, I feel like

in this situation. But, you know, some people just have an inability to like outwardly communicate and they feel like they're communicating but they're not I was married to one of those people. But here's the thing though, this it's to me, I thought when she said she suggested therapy, I thought that she meant together. You're suggesting therapy to someone and also requiring him to be responsible to make the appointment,

but I was under the impression based on this that they were gonna go to therapy together. Okay, well, let me back this up. Do you feel like if you were going to be doing therapy together with someone that you also need to be doing individual therapy by yourself? Because I do. Yes, but again, when it comes to therapy,

it really boils down to whether the person is willing to take accountability and actually do the work that therapy is. You don't just, we've said this for the past five years. You don't get to just show up to therapy, talk a little bit, and then go home and act like you never went to therapy. Therapy is real work.

Therapy is really, really you have to be in the right mindset for that. And if she's being met with excuses, to me, this is a sign that he's not actually committed to therapy. He's not in the right headspace to go to therapy and therapy is not going to work for him. And at the point that he is not making appointments himself, he's probably not gonna be able because I mean, think about it, right? Like, I went to therapy with two of my exes, obviously not at the same time.

And I actually, but both of them, I was met with me scheduling the appointments, me showing up and half the time they did not show up. Wait, what? They just did not come to the therapy appointments. Okay. I need to ask you this question. Do you feel like therapy is more, more better for you?

More better. More better for you if you were doing couples therapy to do it in person? Because I feel like when you're at home or like in your own space and trying to like make it convenient for both people, it takes a little bit out of like the effort that's being put in to do it. Like I feel like being in the same room with the same person with the emotions all there is better.

Yes and no. I also think a neutral territory depending on how high of a conflict, how high conflict the situation is. The other thing is that to be removed from the situation, I feel like can be helpful for me because it's like you're leaving some of those feelings behind. But I also would like to say that sometimes when you're removed from the situation to your point, like staying in the, maybe the home might be beneficial because I know and I hate to speak about hobby in any way, you know, on the podcast anymore, because I feel like it's sort of dead and gone. But I'm speaking from my experience is that, you

know, when him and I did go to very few sessions, one of the problems that we were having in the office was that she would be like, okay, now you're going to go home and you're going to use these exercises while you're arguing or when you guys have a disagreement or when this when that it's like, if we could do that, we would have done that already. Like if we could use these like, we're not thinking when we're at home to use these strategies, we're not there yet. And so that's it sort of felt counterproductive. Whereas if we're in a therapy session, and we would have been in the home doing it virtually, maybe we would have just came out of an argument,

you know what I mean? Or maybe we would still be in the heat of a moment where she could walk us through it, because we didn't take the drive to cool down to get into the office. And now it's sort of like out of sight out of mind. Does that make sense? Yeah, I think basically what we just said is I believe it's probably situational based on the issue, right? Like if you're trying to avoid having problems within your home and you're wanting to kind of go and trauma dump on your therapist with each other, then it's best to leave the house.

But I also understand your perspective on being able to implement those tools while doing therapy from your house. Yeah, it's and, and maybe the answer is that both are true. And you could do a combination of both because I feel like that could also be productive as well. But the level of reception and willingness that I've experienced from men to go to therapy has not been, I haven't, I haven't met a man yet who has been willing to go to therapy and actually do the work and actually take it seriously and be in the

mindset to take something like therapy seriously. So I don't know if it's just like innately or generally speaking, most men just are not therapy. Well, I think it's society, right? I think men or boys are raised that you're strong, you are to be a leader, you are to be ahead of a household, you are to do all of these things. And so I think it's our responsibility as women

that are raising boys to let them know it's okay for you to have emotions, it's okay for you to have feelings. All of that is valid. I never want my child to grow up and have some of the roadblocks that his dad had because he was raised that you're a boy, you don't have feelings.

You know, and so I tell Jackson all the time, I'm like, if you're feeling something, say it. Yeah. And I put that shit in. I tell my kids, specifically my middle ones, like when they have a hard time with their feelings and stuff like that, I'm like, it's okay to be mad. It's okay to be upset. It's okay to be sad. It's okay to be all of these things. It's just like how you handle it is, you know,

what we have to work on, right? Like you can't be throwing things or you can't be hitting or you know, whatever, whatever it looks like. I'm like, there's just a way to be mad or be upset. And, you know, I think just as a society and as a whole, as a society, yeah, and as a whole, we just need to work on that with men specifically. And I think we're doing, I think as generations go on, we're getting better with it. But hopefully we also need to normalize that it's okay for boys and men to cry. Oh, a hundred percent. And just, you know. Like what the fuck is that?

Like I haven't, have you ever heard somebody say, I haven't cried and like, I've cried like three times in my life. The fuck? I thought I cried three times last week. Like, are you, are you, are you human? It's insane. Like that is the craziest, obviously let's normalize like being able to regulate

our emotions, but you can't regulate your emotions if you're not taught to do that. And I feel bad for, you know, men that it's like, see not her, don't cry, don't, I mean, that's crazy. It's so crazy. But back to this situation, I feel like she would definitely benefit from doing individual therapy

before working on doing therapy with him because she's already with a psychiatrist claiming that she is depressed. And so I think maybe working through some of that stuff before trying to do couples therapy, if that is the intention is probably the best Some people just cannot communicate and until they're willing to get help for themselves. You can't help them I agree and that goes across the board in life and with all things right like

Addiction therapy self-help just like anything in general agreed agreed Can I tell you about this other lawsuit that I'm very upset about? Yes. Cause I have this in my pantry and a lot of it when I say like have it in my pantry, like an entire shelf of it. Kraft mac and cheese class action lawsuit over artificial preservatives will be moving forward. This, this actually hurts my heart because I love Kraft mac and cheese so much.

And I will always pick the powdered cheddar over Velveeta. Oh, are you a powder girl over Velveeta? 100%. Obviously homemade mac and cheese is in a different category. Like, I just feel like that there's no real comparison. But when it comes to boxed macaroni and cheese, I am craft all the way over over Velveeta.

See, I didn't grow up on craft. I grew up on Velveeta and I hate my mom always always always bought boxed Velveeta and it pissed me off because I'm like, I just want craft. So Kristin just said she adds two packets of powder to one box of macaroni. Like great in theory, but what the fuck are you doing with the other noodles? Like I don't understand throwing it out.

That is so wasteful. Like no, I am absolutely not doing that. How about we normalize putting, you know, extra cheese in the noodles like other cheeses because you can melt other cheeses in the mac so that you can use all the noodles He said let us buy the powder like separately. No, I mean, I absolutely love Kraft macaroni and cheese I really like the ones that are easy that you put in the microwave like them Oh, do you remember back when we were kids? I was telling people this the other day when ragu Express came out Ragu Express. Yeah, it was made

homemade Pasta like red pasta ragu Express Anybody listening to this kill is looking at me. Like she does not know what ragu Express is and she has never had it I'm pretty sure they took it off the shelves, but it pisses me off No, I've never heard of Ragu Express in my entire life. Like I don't even know what that is. Oh my god, it's so good. But let me tell you about this class action lawsuit. An Illinois federal judge declined to dismiss this class action lawsuit filed against the Kraft Heinz

company and Kraft Heinz Ingredients Corp over claims the company falsely marketed a variety of its Kraft macaroni and cheese products as containing no artificial flavors, preservatives or dyes. The judge disagreed with Kraft's argument that the citric acid in the mac and cheese products was natural and that consumers lacked support for their claims that the products contain artificial citric acid. lacked support for their claims that the products contain artificial citric acid. The craft action lawsuit was filed in an Illinois federal court

and the judge is declining to throw it out. So they're gonna move forward. You know the, one of the Heinz factories is right here in Dover. I think they actually shut it down or it got bought out or something. Are you Hunts or Heinz for ketchup? Heinz.

I'm a Heinz girl too. I don't know that I've ever had hunts. Like if I did, I didn't know. Well, I've had it before and it's not good. I've had it before and it's not good. I don't like knockoff brands of ketchup in general. Like I'm a very specific person when it comes to mayo and ketchup,

cause I just feel like any sort of weird Tang or twang or whatever is just not for me. It's it's not the move. Um, I just want to know like, what's gonna happen with this. And I also think it's a very problematic if there is some like bad shit. Listen, I'm still gonna eat the box mac and cheese. Okay, I'm not saying that it's getting thrown away because it's not. But like letting me know what's in it is kind of important for me as a consumer, not that it's going to

change the fact of what I'm going to do. But for some people, what if you're allergic to like artificial dyes or stuff? Well, that's where it gets tricky. Because if there's no transparency in that, and then people are getting like deathly ill reactions, anything like that, that's, that's where it gets really sketch. Very sketch.

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Okay, we have another listener topic. This listener says, if you have a good friend and suspect your child might be on the spectrum, do you say something or let them figure it out on their own? I've asked others for advice and some have said that the parents probably know and just haven't talked about it, but I don't think they are suspecting anything. Said child just started pre-K and my friend was shocked that the teacher said something about his speech and behavior.

He's for and not speaking clear sentences, frequently, stems, et cetera. I care for this child and I want to support, not judge, but just not sure if it's my place. I don't think I would mention autism at all because it's not my place to diagnose, but I thought about asking if they've tried considering speech therapy thoughts

I feel like when it comes to other people's children that This is not anyone's place to speak up and say anything unless they brought it to you and feel like you're in open space to Have a conversation and then I believe that Maybe giving some of that advice would be good or suggestions. But I think if the child is four years old, a mother or a father would know that there is some type of delay. And so I don't think that they need to be told that or recommended speech therapy by anyone else. See, I have a little bit of a different feeling on it, a different perspective. Well, one,

if this is the couple's first child, they might not know any difference. So they may think that their child is neurotypical. That's number one. Number two, I think that it does depend on the type of people and the relationship that you have with someone. I have been concerned about certain things that my kids have exhibited growing up. I've had several of my children evaluated for autism just because I've noticed certain things or I've noticed a pattern of things, X, Y, Z. And I have actually asked someone that I respected and I thought would be honest with me

about if they saw any concerns. Not everybody is like that. There are people who would be very offended and very appalled really if someone said something about their child. Someone had made a comment to me over the summer about, oh, are you sure that your child is not autistic? And I said, yeah, I had him evaluated. I'm positive. And that didn't necessarily offend me because I understood where she came to that conclusion. I had a

friend, I have a friend who is someone I consider one of my best friends. And I very much was concerned about her daughter and I didn't bring it to her attention because I knew my relationship with her and I knew my place. And even though I felt like we were close enough that maybe if it was Kristen, I could have said something. I felt I made the personal decision that it wasn't my place to say something

to this specific friend. And she ended up going to, you know, do whatever she needed to do later on. And it was a little bit further along. And I do think that it would have been more beneficial had she done the testing prior to when she did, but that's not my place. And so I think that you have to use some level of judgment. You know, it varies by person, right? Like you have to sort of gauge that. And even though it may come from a good place, you do have to tread carefully

because this is someone's child. And so I don't know. I don't think this is a one size fits all. I would want you, like, for example, if you came to my house and you stayed for a weekend and you noticed certain things, I would fully want you. It's sort of like the cheating thing. Do you wanna know that your spouse is cheating or not?

And even though you say that you wanna know, you might actually not wanna know. It's sort of like the cheating thing. Do you want to know that your spouse is cheating or not? And even though you say that you want to know, you might actually not want to know. It's one of those things I would want someone to tell me and raise red flags that I could keep an eye out for my children. I just feel like that maybe a better thing would be to allow this child's pre-k teacher to bring it to the attention of the parents because they're seeing them in a school setting. And I know there are certain things that Jackson has like does and has done at home that I'm like, Oh my gosh, I need to take you to a doctor. But then at school, he completely exhibits something else. So I think also is this person seeing

them in a school setting versus like a home setting because I think that also changes. Well masking is a real thing. I masked my entire life and I truly believe that I like I told Kristen this the other day we were on the phone and I said Kristen I've had ADHD symptoms since I was a child and every I masked depending on where I was what sort on where I was, what sort of setting I was like in whatever school was very different, you know, and I and I see that in one of my kids, like I know that one of my kids very much, we have these like rater

forms that teachers have to fill out for the students or whatever. And then you go home and then you fill out the thing and then you take it to the doctor and they determine, you know, is this the first step in a diagnosis or whatever. And I know for a fact that my child is masking at school. So I think that should be considered, but it shouldn't be the only thing considered. I also will say that teachers here, I can't speak for all states, but here they're allowed to raise concerns with the parents, but obviously not allowed to diagnose. So they can say sort of like in this situation, hey, I'm noticing X, Y, and Z, you know, you might want to think about getting them evaluated. I know that they're allowed to certain places are allowed

to say that. I don't know if that's a federal law or if it's state by state, because also in the state of Georgia they're not allowed to diagnose. They're allowed to bring concern within a conference, send an email like whatever it may be, but to even direct you as a parent to have your child tested that's not even allowed. Really? Oh, they can't suggest maybe maybe that's the same here. I know that they can they can sort of like raise concern like have concerns. I don't maybe they can't suggest. No, I'm pretty sure because I did a whole parent teacher conference a couple years ago with one of my

kids. And they they gave not referrals. I don't want to call them referrals, but they gave options for who does certain testing. Oh, interesting. So I don't know if it was like, because I asked they were allowed to offer, like, hey, we know of x, y, and z places that do it. Or if I didn't ask, they're not allowed to. I don't know.

I have no idea. And I also just want to say the person said that they don't want to say autism but refer to it as spectrum. From what I know, it's all on spectrum. So like if you're saying autism, it's spectrum related. So like those words are kind of interchangeable. Asperger's is no longer recognized in the world of spectrum. They have now leveled autism. So it's like autism level one, two, three, based off of severity.

But used to, it used to be Asperger's was an acceptable term to be used for a form of autism. But it's separate. It is autism, but it is not a term that is socially acceptable to be used anymore. That would be like autism stage one or level one. So, so Asperger, we don't say Asperger's anymore? No. It would be like level one autism. Yeah, or like, whatever is level one the highest functioning? Yes. And then level two would be moderate mild autism. Yeah, and three would be maybe what nonverbal? More severe. More severe, okay.

Yeah. Yeah, but it's all spectrum. Well, I think that, I can't, again, I can't speak for all states. I know Delaware was, it may still be the number one state for autism resources. Also early intervention is big here, like really, really big here.

So they offer services that are free to families. It doesn't matter your income. It, you know, they offer speech therapy, PT, ECE, like all of the things that you could possibly need from birth to three. And then it gets you sort of your foot in the door for whatever services you may need or qualify for beyond three years old. One of my twins is in several services.

He has therapies.com three times a week. And so he has an ECE speech and PT for just therapies to get him to hit the milestones that he needs to hit. Doesn't necessarily mean that he's on the autism spectrum or not. Right now we're not seeing signs of being on the spectrum, but Birth to Three as a whole is a program that they do just to be able to get your child on. Maybe it's a speech delay and that's it. Maybe there's nothing further outside of that. But I know that Delaware is a really, really good place to be in. And other states may have similar

programs to Birth to Three or maybe the same program. So if this person needs resources, maybe offer some resources in a gentle way that doesn't necessarily pinpoint or target that child that you are concerned about. No, I agree. And I think early intervention is so important because before they start kindergarten, you can really have a grasp on your child and what's going on so you can advocate for them the best before they get into an actual school setting. Agreed. And on that note, we have foul play. My boyfriend and I at the time decided to do mushrooms one night in our apartment.

We had just finished having sex, lights were off and the mushrooms really kicked in. I was in one part of the apartment and my boyfriend went into the kitchen around the corner. Suddenly I hear a big crash on the floor and go running into the kitchen. My boyfriend had stood up too fast and passed out knocking right above his eye on the kitchen cabinet. The way blood was gushing out of his face on mushrooms. It's a moment I'll never forget. We were both ass naked, absolutely freaking out.

Don't worry though, a few of his friends came over and poured liquor on it and stitched it up in the bathroom. You guessed it on mushrooms. Ma'am, if I passed out in a kitchen and gashed my eye, someone coming over and stitching me up is not a fucking option. But I think when you're on the mushrooms, you're like, yeah, it's cool. I don't know. I've never done them.

Hey, what is it like? I don't know if it's like chills you out. Like, I don't know. How do you feel like you would talk if you were on them? I just picture like hippies, like stone tippies and be like, yeah, dude, like just like so chill. So cool. I don't know if that happens or not. The way that I would take some gorilla glue to my high Oh, for sure. Just throw it on there. Like, could you imagine just some rando like one of your friends just coming over and

it's like, hey, let me stitch you up. I have zero knowledge of how to do this whatsoever. But I got this needle out of my sewing kit. And here we go. I know. I have to hold it together, hold the wound together, let it stick for a second, glue it, and then hold it there because you don't want the glue to also seep into the wound.

You wanna hold it together so it doesn't and you want it, no. The way that I was holding that, your fingers would be glued to your eye also. Oh, you're right. You are right. That's crazy. Like they'd be like, right. I can't I can't even imagine I just feel like this is a tragic situation and one that I do not want to be involved in. I know that you have to go to parent teacher conferences. So that's all we have time for today. Thank you

guys for always supporting our show. Please subscribe and review on the Apple podcast app follow and rate on Spotify or listen wherever you get your podcast Do not forget to follow us on Instagram and join our Facebook group to connect with us in our community Full video episodes are now available on kills patreon to join visit www.patreon.com Slash kill Lowry. We hope that you guys have a great week and we'll talk to you soon. See ya