Coffee Convos with Kail Lowry and Lindsie Chrisley - Unbothered & Completely Delusional

Episode Date: August 20, 2026

CC 493: Disclaimer: This episode was recorded in early May 2026, prior to the events that have since unfolded.Kail and Lindsie are still in New York, and somehow a near-miss with an Uber, a hoverboard, and one very angry pedestrian turns into a full debate over who is actually the more dramatic one. Kail recaps her wildly overconfident WWE training experience, including the moment she realized her dreams of becoming the next Bella Twin might require being able to do a forward roll.Then, the two put their friendship to the test with a game of how well they really know each other, calling out irrational pet peeves, bad habits, secret sensitivities, relationship types, and the things they pretend not to care about. Lindsie also has some questions about where 95 school glue sticks disappeared to, Kail admits she is far more bothered than people think, and they agree that quiet beauty appointments should absolutely be normalized.Plus, a Foul Play involving a late-night pizza delivery, period blood, and an unsuspecting delivery driver sends the conversation completely off the rails.Get your Fatherless Behavior Tour Tickets hereFor full videos head towww.youtube.com/@KailandtheChaosTo send in your Foul Plays email us at [e-mail] you for checking out our sponsors!Skims: Shop our favorite bras and underwear at SKIMS.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows.RoBody: Find out if you’re covered for free at ro.com/coffeeconvosFigs: Go to wearfigs.com and use code FIGSRX for 15% off your first order - code FIGSRX.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

I hate gift giving and receiving. Receiving gifts is so weird. What do you say thank you? This is coffee convos with Kail Lowry and Lindsay Crissly. I really want you to be in your feels, Kail. That does not interest me whatsoever. I feel very attacked by you. A spirited discussion about motherhood, friendship, family, and life in the public eye.

I'm just not with the fakery anymore. There's a fakery bakery around here. Here's Kail and Lindsay. Disclamer, this episode was recorded in early May, 2026, prior to the events that have since unfolded, the conversation reflects the information and circumstances as they were at the time of recording. Welcome to Coffee Convo's podcast. Lindsay, this bitch, is the most unbothered fucking person on the planet. Okay, we almost died yesterday. And I'm not being, well, we didn't almost die. We almost, our Uber driver almost took out a pedestrian while we were in the car. He was on like one of

those hoverboard things. That was so dangerous in the middle of New York City. And, And the audience is saying he was on a bike. No. No. He wasn't. He was on a hoverboard. He was on a hoverboard. He was on a hoverboard.

Wait. Wait, Lindsay, he was on a hoverboard? Babe, was he on a hoverboard? Are you talking about a city bike? No. Let me tell you something. He was on some sort of thing. Rolling wheels.

So we go in this Uber. We get in this Uber. We're in New York City. Lindsay, myself, Madison, and I get in this Uber. And the Uber driver is fine. Like I don't. Yeah. I think he's fine.

I'm on TikTok live. I'm in the backseat in the middle between Madison on my right and Lindsay on my left. Ike is in the front seat with the Uber driver. The Uber driver, from my recollection was fine. And this pedestrian on some sort of moving. wheels. It was a hoverboard for sure. Yeah.

Basically like get so, I don't know if he wasn't paying attention and the Uber driver wasn't paying attention. I don't fucking know. We almost hit this kid, this guy. Lindsay is not faced. Lindsay does not flinch. Lindsay does not react. Lindsay does not have a single thought about this.

This guy cusses our Uber driver smooth the fuck out saying that, you know, know, he needs to open his eyes. And he was in a bike lane. He's in a bike lane. Okay, we're talking about New York City. Where else do you want us to go? It's, it's just, you're just dip it and dodging all over the fucking place. And I love that a T-page picks this up.

And the caption is, Kale and Lindsay Crisley's driver almost hit a pedestrian. He yells at them. Hold on. Let me watch it. Kail's mouth is wide open and I'm just literally looking out the window. I was traumatized by the simple fact that I cannot take on something else and someone else's motherfucking court date. I cannot take that on and put that in my goddamn schedule to fit in a witness testimony for

an Uber driver hitting a potential hoverboarder. I don't have time. But the fact that he just kept looking back and like cussing at our Uber driver, I'm like, sir, you need to go on. Like, you need to get away from this vehicle. I am traumatized because I don't know the law well enough to know if... I feel like the law... I don't know if the hoverboard counts for the bike lane.

Like, does that count? I think it's just the fact of any pedestrian that would be in that, right? Like, whether they're on two wheels on a, like, peddling bike. I don't have the time. The thing is that... They would request and probably subpoena us. And I wouldn't know what to do. I'm going on tour.

I don't. I'm going to be in another state. I don't have time to come to New York to be a witness and decide with a jury. With a jury? I don't know what's going on. Literally go on the sidewalk if you don't want to get hit. I just don't understand what was going on. I'm concerned about you.

in all of this, not a single reaction. I think that that's the level of disassociation that I am at. Her only comment about last night was we were next to trash in New York City on the sidewalk, and she looks and she goes, that smells. Girl, what? It really is concerning. And now that y'all are raising concerns that you were concerned. About you.

And also my schedule. I was concerned about your lack of reaction. What was I going to do, though? Nothing. Like, haven't you ever heard of, like, if you're getting in an accident, like, don't react? Lindsay, someone almost died. No, he didn't. The guy on the fucking hoverboard.

He just got honked at. No, he almost died. That man almost smacked into the Uber and you were not faced. Then why didn't he get away from the Uber? I could not understand. Like, I'm watching this go on in real time and he's just still lingering around the front of the car. I'm sorry, but if I was an active hoverboarder and I had almost gotten hit in New York City, I think I would get the fuck out of the way. I almost died on a hoverboard. Have you ever been on a hoverboard? No. If you want to break your neck or you have a

death wish, by all means, use one. I would never go on a hoverboard in my life. And in fact, my parents, right before they went to prison, this is like crazy, but they bought Jackson. That sentence is insane. They bought Jackson a scooter hoverboard combo thing. No. So you can like take the bottom part off and use this as a hoverboard and then pop it back on. And it's like the palette of like where you put your feet to scooter. No.

No, Jackson, they just face off on the concrete. Like that's not something that I'm ever doing. The way I would eat shit so fast. The way my parents brought that to federal court and then met me in a parking lot to get it out of the back. of their car so that he could have the hoverboard scooter combo is insane. They brought it to court. Wait. Yeah, we met.

We almost went to court about a goddamn hoverboard. But like they brought it. They brought it to court and we met in another parking lot and they transferred it. And this was like after sentencing. Like the level of trauma that had to have been going on and just the fact that we're getting a hoverboard like out of the back of the vehicle and putting it in another is in truly insane. Nobody could have mailed it.

Maybe we're saving on shipping. I don't know. One time in fourth grade, I tried to get on a skateboard and I fell off and I got hurt. Well, you know, sometimes, like, you get hurt and it hurts for like 20 minutes and then you're fine. It literally doesn't hurt anymore. Yeah, that's why you keep getting in bad relationships like me. The problem is that my mom called out of work.

And so I had to ride that lie. I had to pretend that I was... Your mom caught out of work for what? You falling off a skateboard? Yeah, because I was hurt. And so, like, at the point that she came out of work, I told the babysitter, that I thought I broke my arm, and then I just kept crying and crying,

so they casted my arm at the hospital. But it wasn't real? No. Kail, you and Susie are crazy. I had to do that, though, because if Susie called out of work and my arm wasn't broken, how the fuck was I going to explain myself?

That you fell off a skateboard because you're a kid. Yeah, well, they cast him my arm. They said they don't see a fracture, but they have to wrap it because of how I was acting. It's still how you act. like it was how she was acting in the car yesterday with the hub reporter I'm like it's not that big of a deal

like the Uber driver is the responsible party and it wasn't a big deal I don't know I feel like almost getting hit by a car is almost dying okay so for the non-visual watchers of Coffee Convo's podcast I wish you were visually watching because the way that Kiel is laid out on this polypocket couch

She said, Kail said before we started recording that this probably was in my Barbie dream house when I was a little girl. Like, this is a crazy couch. But like, why are you laid out like that? I've never been more tired a day in my life. I've been hard to believe after WWE and the horse. No, this is a compilation of that because I'm still reeling from that. Do you know what you mean? Of the horse?

No, no, not the horse. I forgot about that. Let me tell you something about WWE. There is no room for me. in that company. No, there was never an offer, but I'm just saying like... She's saying if there is, she is not doing it. Let me tell you the thing.

No, because as if there ever was. No, because this is what my idea was, okay? Remember a couple of episodes ago? I was going to be the ring girl. Yes, you were there. So, so I go to the training, right? I'm going to be so honest, this is a really vulnerable moment. for me because I don't have a lot of confidence and I'm not athletic, okay?

But I just knew and I never said this out loud to anyone. There's a lot of things on this trip. I just want to preface before you continue going that there are a lot of things that you've never said out loud to anyone. And based off of the last 12 hours of my life, I have developed new traumas. From shit that I say. I. Level of confidence right now.

like if I don't say it out loud if I'm not self deprecating. Y'all, she literally left my house, caught that red eye, and she was like, this is about to be my next career move. No, literally. Like, no, it was literally in my breath. I'm like, I'm going to fuck this shit up so good that they're going to need me. Love to be on that level of delusion. Oh my God.

The level of delusion, Madison. I'm literally crying real tear. I was so bad. It was so bad. Here's the thing, though. The one guy, he was a professional character. Not you. It wasn't me.

He was shorter than me. And like, he wanted me to throw me over his shoulder. And I'm like, I can't allow you to do that. Like, I can't. And I just realized that this is not. I couldn't even do a forward role. Wait, what? You want to see the picture?

Yes. It is concerning. But like a forward roll, Kail, is like kind of insane. The forward roll was so bad. When you were in elementary school, did you not have to practice stop, drop, and roll for like the fire rolls? Yeah, roll this way. Not this way. That's the same way.

No, you don't, when you're on fire, you roll like how I'm laying and you roll. These are like fucking somersaults and they're doing 15 in a goddamn row. I guess my concern is the high expectations that you have. had for yourself. Did you ever think about possibly practicing before getting involved? No. Kail, why is that picture like that? Because I obviously can't do a forward role. And just Matt Matthews in the back looking so fucking concerned.

He's like, ooh. Can you imagine if Kail broke her neck? Like that would be. Lindsay, it felt like I broke my neck after that. As you guys all know, I recently went to London and went into the skim store in this. there and obviously had to get a couple purchases because I'm obsessed with the Skims cotton rib tank and it just has become one of those pieces that I reach for all the time. It's super easy to wear. It's soft. It's flattering. And I needed to go get one in London. Listen, I saw that you were

at the Skim store and I was so jealous because I haven't been to one yet. And I just think that it's such a chic store. I wear a skims bra every single day of my life. But I have been reaching for the cotton jersey foldover pants. I don't know if you got those yet. But this, They are so good. Skims has completely changed the standards for lounge wear for me and they're just so unbelievably soft. They have the perfect amount of stretch and somehow just managed to feel so cozy while still looking flattering and I know that's sometimes hard. I wear them so often lounge around the house, running errands and just feel effortlessly put together. I agree with you and I'm obsessed. You guys can shop skims cotton and all of our favorite pieces at skims.com. But after you place your order, be sure to let them know that.

we sent you select podcast in the survey and be sure to select coffee combos podcast in the drop down menu that follows. But long story short, I'm not, I need to give up athletics of all sorts. Big back athletics. Big back athletics, but it's more like, I like to eat more. Kail, the last episode that we recorded, she was like, ooh, I ate too much. We get an hour later. and she's like, I'm hungry. I'm like, what the fuck is happening? My period starts in a week. So sinking periods is really wild to me, like that the human body can sink up to another female.

Why does, how does that happen? It's science and we need to call Bill Nye. I wonder if they could give me like a, like a. No, we all three cannot be on the period at the same time. Oh, I was going to say WWE. they could give me like a manager situation. You're still on it. Like she.

Do you think they'll listen to this podcast and be like, okay, we'll give her like a comedic role? If anything, it's going to be a comedic role. Yes. They're like, you could be a commentator. If I'm being honest, I thought it was more acting than athletics. And I was like, okay, this is going to be like this segue into my acting career also. It was like, it was like, WWE is like the trial run for acting.

You know what I mean? And so I was like, all right, bet. You're not John Zina. It's literal workouts. No, like. It's literally like acrobat. It's working out and acting. It's those two things combined.

Soraya made her comeback to WWE and she split her head open like the first day. But I can just envision Kail getting on this red eye. And she is hyping herself up so mentally. And she's not. not telling anyone. She's not telling anybody because she's like, I'm going to blow everybody away. I knew it. I was going to blow everyone away. I was finally going to be good at something. And it was going to be amazing. And she had convinced herself mentally that she was going to be the next John Cena. No, I literally was like, I'm taking, I'm coming for the Bella Twins. Like, I'm taking, I'm going to be so good.

It's one for the price of two. I was going to rock. I don't know if I'm not. I don't know if I'm I'm crying because I'm laughing at myself or crying God of pure embarrassment. No, because this is going to air. Like, people are going to see how bad it was. Alice, 100 said this is maladaptive daydreaming, that it's like the same thing that Keel was doing, showing an old picture of herself saying it was her sister and that Whitney Spears was my older sister and that she was talking to a sweatshirt in a car because, because it was a Hansen.

Like, this has gone to a point. My boy, that's gonna break up with me, stop reminding him. The talking to a sweatshirt is really like, I was an only child. Can you just imagine like what her social media would have changed into if she would have gotten a contract with WWE?

We're gonna go ahead and do a rebrand. Um, you know what? Make this happen. You know. If she actually gets a contract from this podcast episode. I'll give you a cut of it. I don't even know that I hit the ropes correctly, but we can move on. The level of delusion.

If I had that level of delusion every day of my life, I would be unstoppable. No, you would be stopped. Like, that is when the grippy sock vacation will happen. That is insane. Okay, we're going to play a game of how well we know each other. Okay. And the area that we're going to start is these are. ones that will expose each other.

Oh, no. The first one is she is most embarrassing when. And you have to say like when I'm most embarrassing and I have to say when you're most embarrassing and I'm going to go first. She is most embarrassing when she thinks that she's getting a contract from WWE. You're most embarrassing when you're on a rampage about beef tips. I mean, fair.

I feel like people should not be posting recipes that number one, don't cook. I know your two, don't post on social media until they start posting on social media. So, like, that will send me to the moon. Yeah, like, don't try to be someone you're not. Okay, the next one, she gets irrationally angry about. About your hyperfixations. Yes. Because when you have something that you're not willing to let go of yet, every time you talk about it is animated.

bust the gates of hell wide open to hold on to something that I am not ready to let go. And like it is irrationally angry. Like I have zero reason to be that irrationally angry over a career. Okay, I'll tell you a time that I got irrationally angry. I was on the phone with the school and Jackson has ADHD, but there is this one class that he has that has a supply list that's like 95 pages long. Okay. They also do not use lockers at the school. This, that pisses me off.

Don't even have lockers in the school because they don't use them. Correct. Anyways. Moving off for them. So this teacher also specifically asked for class supplies. So I'm like, okay, and I always try to buy like a couple of items off of each teacher's class like wish lists. Yeah. These are supposed to be shared supplies for the class.

I provided roughly 95 glue sticks. at the beginning of the year. Why am I getting 95 emails about how my kid doesn't have a glue stick? Give him one of the 95 that I provided and why do we have class supplies that the class cannot use? Like, what are you using them for?

If I get another phone call about a fucking Elmer's glue stick, I am going to come unglued. Like, I am irrationally angry. Nothing you've said right now. That would actually, that makes sense to me. and it all pisses me off.

But like, sends me to the moon. Like, I provided 95 glue sticks at the beginning of the year. Like, if the kids aren't allowed to use them, then why did I provide them? Are you doing arts and crafts in your classroom without them? What are you doing? No, to be fair, because 95 glue sticks, and you know for a fact that other people also provided glue sticks. So those are not the only, those are, it's not just 95.

And yes, you have to share them with the class for the whole year. But by January, you should not have gone through over 100 glue sticks because you're not the only one that provided them. But also, if we're having like class supplies, then why can't we just all use community supplies? And then we're not carrying all of that stuff in our backpacks because we're no longer allowed to use lockers. Like, this is a hill that I'm going to die on. And I'm going to keep talking about it. So it's class supplies, but then does she divvy them up and then they send them home?

No, I don't know where they are. And like, you can't use them in the class. You have to have them, you have to have other ones in your backpack. I didn't get to say what Kiel gets so irrationally angry about because it's everything. Like the level of irrational anger. Like last night. It's been a while. No, it wasn't.

It was literally 12 hours ago. Oh, the next one, you guys, is so good. It's got a blank in it, okay? And you've got to fill it in. So it would be like, Kiel think she's good at blank. But she's not. Horseback riding, WWE. No, I'm supposed to answer.

Oh, okay. Yours, you're supposed to answer for me. Yours would be Lindsay thinks she's good at blank, but she's not. Okay. What do I think I'm good at that I'm not good at? Lindsay thinks she's good at being quiet. I am the quietest person that you've ever met in your life. No.

What? The way that you came into that guest room, like a bat out of hell. on that day on that day was so entertaining there was nothing quiet about it but I feel like I'm in general in general a quiet person

am I not until you're comfortable I think yeah like I'm quiet around strangers okay fair that's fair okay so I think I'm good at being quiet but I'm not okay Kiel thinks she's good at being a wrestler but she's

I never get to do anything fun. What? Like, how fucking cool would that be? Kiel, you were trying to manifest something that was not manifestable. Okay. Kale is actually really good at blank and doesn't give herself enough credit. Sleeping. Kail is actually really good at making lots of things happen at one time and does not give herself enough credit.

I'll cry right now. Lindsay is very good at cooking. She made homemade Italian pasta salad and deviled eggs and collar greens for us when she hosted us last week. And you're a very good mom. And you need to give yourself more credit for that. That's so sweet. We're not going to turn this into a sappy episode. Well, bring Jackson to my WWE show.

Kale cries watching herself. that's the blank. Herself is blank. I cry watching myself. Yeah. Yeah. I feel like you could look in the mirror and cry. I feel like you could walk around this Airbnb

and find something on the wall to cry about. You could cry about not becoming a WWE wrestler. You could cry about not getting a contract. Kail cries about everything. Wait, is that the statement though? Like, she cries watching. Blank. You cry.

Lindsay cries watching probably documentary. That's true. Like an emotional. I'm trying to think of one that we've watched. Or like a love story. Love stories, yeah. Like I don't have one.

So it's like, that is true. Okay. And I've cried reading some of the books that you've told me to read. Oh, good. Don't, I'm not going to give you, don't read the last letter and don't read the river is waiting because you will sob. I feel like the second you're pregnant, you're basically living at your doctor's office, and it doesn't stop once you're a mom because, as you know, Lindsay, it's appointments,

it's sick visits, all of it. And it really makes you appreciate all of the nurses and doctors and everyone who takes care of you and your kids through everything. If you're a healthcare professional, you deserve the best, starting with what you wear. And that's where figs come in. I absolutely love figs scrubs. I think they are so chic. They're so cute. And all of the doctor's offices that I go to, wear figs. It's out with boxy, stiff scrubs and with breathable, flexible, and ridiculously soft fabric that feels as good as it looks, which is saying a lot. Back to school season is here, and while that means lectures, labs, and late night for healthcare workers in training,

it's also a reminder that in medicine, education never really ends. Figs is the premium apparel brand for healthcare professionals, just dropped fresh colors and exclusive back-to-school styles. So from scrubs to outerwear to footwear and beyond. Figgs keeps awesome humans looking sharp, performing their best, and ready to take on anything from marathon lab sessions to 12-hour shifts. So if you're in healthcare or you know someone who is, get 15% off your first order at wherefigs.com with code figs RX. That's wherefigs.com code figs Rx. Her most dramatic moment that I've witnessed was your most dramatic moment that I not to make it sappy, but

I mean, when you left Delaware the last time, that was wild. Why? I was dramatic? No, you weren't dramatic, but it was a dramatic time in your life. Like, it was a dramatic event. Dramatic and traumatic. Yes.

Your most dramatic moment that I've ever witnessed was every day. I feel like, Hill is the most animated. Like, she could go outside and a cloud could be too close to the road. And she would find, like, drama within that. She would be like, the sky is going to fall. It's going to harm someone.

Does spaghetti sound good? Are you talking about what we're eating? Mm-hmm. Are you okay? No. My stomach's growling. Okay. She says blank way too much and doesn't realize it.

Do you know what I mean? Do you know what I mean? Lindsay says, don't piss me off. Lindsay says don't piss me off. Lindsay says, oh. Lindsay says tinful. Lindsay says, Loser cunt.

And I'm trying to think what else. There's several things. Especially. Especially I say a lot. Diabolical, I say a lot. Yeah, but there's other things that I'm trying to think of. It's hard to come up with them on the spot. Treacherous.

Treacherous. I love that word. I feel like it's way underused. It is underused. There are certain things that I feel like if we had to play some sort of game with you, Alessandra, Madison, Lissa, everybody, and we had to guess who said what. I would know every time which one was you. I would know every time which one was you. Really? Yes. I feel like I'd be pretty good at picking out what everyone says. Me too. I think we would. would be the winners of the game. Oh, 1,000%. Okay, this is a good one. The thing that she always says she'll do, but never does it. I feel like you do most of the things you say you're going to do.

No clue. I'm at a loss. Get on a flight, but lying in safe. Yeah, you're a liar when it comes to flights. So you're saying you're going to go somewhere. Oh, flight got delayed. Oh, missed my flight. You never even went to the airport. I might have never booked the flight. She never booked the flight, But also... Y'all didn't know what your line I was on. You don't know because Lindsay turned her location off. So you'll never know. Whether she booked the flight, if she actually went to the airport, or if she's just ghosting.

Also, what I'm really bad at is if somebody texts me and they're like, hey, I really need to talk to you about X, Y, and Z. And I'll be like, all right, but call you in a minute. And then, like, I never do. Madison's saying that's why she always calls me because I always say I'm going to and then I don't. If I know that there's a situation that I don't have to have anxiety about, I also do the same thing. but if someone says, hey, we need to talk, you better call me right now. That will give you PTSD. Like, if you grew up in a house where you had strict parents and you finally got a cell phone

and you had text capabilities and they text you call me, like just the words, call me, please tell me what the emergency is right now. Why can't you call me? Why do you have to text that? Why can't you just do it? Yeah, just call me. It would take less effort for you to call me than it did to send that text message. My parents have always said, like, I would be the last person in the family that would be an emergency contact because I'm definitely never answering.

I'm not calling you or Alessandra. Me? Alessandra, I got to blow up her phone. I notified her anyway the other day. You did? Yeah. When? Um, it was like, this user has...

Imagine I didn't even see it. It was stupid. It was like a screenshot. Oh. It probably was a TikTok, and she's like, I just really need you to see this right now. No, you know what it was? It was so fucking stupid. But in the moment, I needed you to see it.

Yeah, you'd be doing that. It's okay. It was the blank email that we received. Oh, that's fair, though. And I'm like, notify anyway. But now that I've just pulled it up, that was the most non-urgent thing in the entire world that I did not need to notify her. but I'm like, you can't be my emergency contact, and neither can you. It's a good thing, though.

There will always be someone. Like, you figure out who an emergency contact is, but like, I don't think less with you guys. My emergency contact on every one of my papers that I've, like, had to fill something out since I've been divorced as always will, knowing damn well, he's not going to answer the phone any more than I am. I'm like, please do not call that man if you're in an emergency because we are the same person. Oh, he's the same way with his phone? Absolutely the same way. Like, you could text him five days ago. I mean, he does text me back, but like other people, five days ago and he'll, nothing.

That's actually a good thing, though. I love it. Now you know where his loyalty is. The loyalty is with me. Okay. She is grumpy until she has. She is grumpy until she has sleep and alani. And silence.

And silence. And she likes a good, quiet appointment for hair, makeup. massage, whatever. Yeah, I don't like talking appointments to me or just like, why am I here? Well, it's like, I'm not here for that. Yeah. And like mostly I don't really, what am I going to disclose to you at this massage? I don't need to tell.

I don't know you. You don't feel awkward. Like you have to fill the space with, did they feel uncomfortable for being quiet? Well, they're the one doing the. service. So I'm like, this is like what I'm hiring you to do. And it ended up being a talking the whole

time. I could absolutely not do that. I am not kidding you. I will walk into a nail appointment and say, hey, is it okay if I just have a quiet appointment? At a nail salon? At a nail salon. Like, I just want to get my service and I want to enjoy it, even though it's like something that I do to feel presentable.

So So, you know, my friend Taylor owns the hair salon, and that was something that I told her. I said, you know, Lindsay likes a quiet appointment. The reason why it came up, though, is because she does a lot on a regular basis to implement new techniques in her salon, ongoing education, customer service, all the things. And she was twying around with the idea of doing a survey to her clients to see things like that. Survey, what did you like about your experience?

what did you not like about it? And one of the things I said to put on her form for the survey, I said, you know, Lindsay likes quiet appointments. Like that's something that you could put on the survey to figure out, like, do your clients like quiet appointments or not? Like, that could be an option. Like, I feel like for a luxury service for a manicure and pedicure, I'm doing that for two reasons.

Like, I want to look presentable publicly. And I know that I can look presentable publicly. I can look presentable without having my nails done. Like, I know that. But I want to look presentable publicly, but I also want to enjoy that service as like luxury. Pampering. Pampering.

If I go and get my hair washed, I want to be able to enjoy my actual hair wash and the massage of my head without carrying on a conversation. I don't want to do the small talk. I don't want to be in an in-depth conversation. We talk for a living. Nope. I fully agree with you.

But like talking in a massage is insane. This episode is sponsored by Roe. I know that GLP-1s are super popular. They're known for their results, but also people can't stop talking about how sky-high their price tags are, and that reputation alone can make the treatment feel really out of reach for a lot of people. Roe is changing that by helping eligible patients access FDA-approved GLP-1 options at more affordable prices, whether it's through insurance,

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Roe membership and certain GLP-1 medications. Just another way, Roe is working to increase access to the life-changing medication. Cash-pay option ship right to your door, so no pharmacy, visit, it's required. Roe checks insurance coverage for certain GLP1 pins only. Go to row.comco slash coffee combos to see if you qualify. That's row r o.co slash coffee combos to get started on row. For side effects of GLP1 medications, including boxed warning, go to row.com slash safety. Okay, we're going to move to spicy ones. Okay. Her type is blank, even if she won't admit it. Her type is, you'll admit it though, tall, over six foot, six foot, over six foot, and athletic. I think that's your type, but you're not afraid to admit that, so. I feel like Kiel's type changed.

I always have had a type, but the gene pool around me was always so fucked. Like she just settled. Not the gene pool. There was no one around me growing up that was six foot. There was no men. taller than me at any. I dated one my one high school boyfriend was taller than me. He was on the football team. And then when I graduated, Jordan was taller than me. Nobody else has ever been taller than me until Ike. There's just something about

being with a taller man that makes me feel so much more secure. And I know that's probably like an insecurity within myself. No, I don't think it is. But like I just feel so much more secure. The way that my some, not all the way

way, perception has changed a little bit. Being with someone who's bigger than me and taller than me has helped with my femininity, I feel. And I just feel more secure with someone bigger than me and taller than me. Genuinely, had I met Ike, actually, I knew him already. Had we had a baby outside of high school, we would have had a fucking D1 baby. My jeans and his jeans together probably would have made a big kid, right? everybody that I've pretty much dated

they nobody comes like nobody's six foot Trent was tall I think maybe like around six two and me five four and a quarter love it and then wills between six four and six five

love that the idea of climbing a tree is much more appealing to me than a shrub I can lift me up and I was like so excited I'm like maybe if we get married like you'll be able to pick me up and walk me through the door. Here we go with the dreams. Here we go to the maladaptive daydreams. No, because when I got married the first time, he couldn't lift me and put me through the fucking

threshold. Oh, so you're going to do like that traditional? Well, no, but now I know that he could do it. It's like, thanks. It says the tradition of carrying a bride over the threshold originated from ancient Rome, medieval European and British customs, primarily designed to protect against evil spirits and ensure good fortune in the new home. It acted as a superstitious safeguard against bad luck and in some historical context symbolized the unwilling departure of the bride from her family home. But I think those types of like traditions don't work if you're not living the rest of that life of that tradition, right? Because you're going to have him carry you across your own threshold that you've walked across a million times. But now it's our threshold for

the first time as man and wife. Okay. But also, I know he can do it now. So I'm turned on so I don't need him to actually do it. When we were so traditional. I'm not. I just... She just likes the idea that he can carry her. Like sometimes I just want him to pick me up because he can. I just love that for you. Okay.

Like I'm a child. The next one is the thing she pretends to not care about but completely does. Me. You pretend to not care about me, but you do. What? When do I pretend not to care about her? When you go on D&D for two days? That is insane.

Like, kill literally. thinks that my D&D means that I am dipping and dodging her. Every single day last week I'm like, is Lindsay not talking to me? But I just think it's funny that like everybody communicates behind my back. But it is like thoughtful, but everybody

communicates behind my back to try to figure out what it is that I'm doing and like why I can't answer a text. And it's like my thumbs can't go. I texted Hunter when I didn't hear from you. And I said, can you just tell me that Lindsay's okay? Like can you just text? Like I have not heard from her.

And he's like, yeah, she's fine. Yeah, because he has access to my cameras in my house. So he's like, I know when that bitch pulls out of that driveway and when she pulls in, like, and I know she's fine. I know she got there. With my experience, the one time I don't worry that you're not talking to me, you're going to be knocked down, drag out, pissed at me. Mental illness.

It's definitely not me. I just said, I literally put in my calendar, Lindsay on D&D. Yeah, when you showed me that, I was like, all right, I feel better. Because it's like, okay, I know when we go home from this trip, you're going to go D&D for a couple days. She already showed me it's in the calendar. Okay, I feel good. Probably nothing I did. The thing that Kale pretends to not care about but completely does is opinions of others.

Yeah, I'm bothered. Yeah. No doubt. Like, on this Mattel. Couch. Polly pocket couch, there is arguably one of the most bothered people on this couch and one of the most unbothered people on this couch. And I feel like the majority of people that listen to our podcast would like have that reverse. They would think I was bothered and you weren't.

I would agree with that. But I'm really bothered all the time. Okay. Let's see. We're going to do one more and then we're going to do snacks. If she wasn't doing what she is doing now, what would she be? If you weren't a podcaster, you'd be in marketing or you would be a Pinterest mom and you'd be volunteering at the school. Correct.

both of those. A trad wife. I'm just kidding. I'm kidding. Like, we talked about this a little bit when we were in Atlanta. Like, working behind the scenes and the industry that we're in, but like doing it in a marketing and like a strategic capacity would be something that I would be interested in if I wasn't podcasting. But then also like a stay at home wife and mom. Yeah. I could see that on you. Like the crock pot out every day. Beef tip recipes on deck. Beef tips on deck. What Kale would be doing if she was not podcasting, I think she would write more books. Yeah, I would. On that note, we have foul play. This foul play is titled Bloody Pizza Delivery. And I don't know if my stomach is like going to be able to handle this. When my now husband, then boyfriend and I first started dating, we were both working nights.

The only saving grace, a local pizza place that delivered real dinner food at 2 a.m. We were basically their VIP customers. Okay. So one night, we order our usual, and let's say we decided to pass the time while waiting. Oh, I feel like I know where this is going. Unfortunately for me, it happened to be that time of the month, and things got a little messy. My man's hands looked like he had just done open heart surgery, blood up to his wrists. And then ding dong, pizza man arrives way faster than expected.

My guy jumps up, racist a door, signs for the food with his bloody hands. y'all that is a felony yeah it is that's a felony that is a felony that's a bodily fluid passed to another person that didn't ask for it do you remember my ex that was obsessed with my period blood it's good yes yes she had an ex that was obsessed with her period blood if i had my period he wanted to put his fingers in my vagina this poor delivery driver was probably questioning his entire career path like did i just delivered dinner to dexter in fact you fucking did like the way I would sue. We still laughed to this day,

imagining what that man thought was happening behind closed doors. Ma'am, you committed a fucking crime. That's what he was thinking. He was contemplating if he had a lawsuit on his hands or if he could get a settlement check. She says, yes, we kept ordering from them. And yes, we tipped very well after that. No, ma'am, you should have gone in

and got your entire life savings and gave it to that man because the way. Well, in theory, you would hand the box. And you wouldn't really touch that man in theory. He signed for it. He signed for it. I missed that part. Where were you? Maltaxed daydreaming.

Like, that's great. If I, I can't. Like, that is literally a felony crime that should be prosecuted at all cost. Do you understand? Like, if you can go to jail for spitting on somebody, and that is a felony. Period blood is like at least class two felony. Yeah. And murder is also a felony. I'm glad that Kail, after we had covered true crime for years on this podcast, she's like,

oh, barely famous. Sounds like a good idea. Let me get a crime expert on here. Oh, murder's a felony? Because I thought it was a completely different. What was it? Like a higher degree. Like a class of, like there's misdemeanors, there's felonies, and then there's murder. Like, why would murder be in the felony? Like, it's just its own entity. I got you. Do you see what I'm, like, what?

Oh, I'm a felon. But there's different classes. Well, you did assault and battery, or you killed somebody. Killing someone, you're not a fucking felon. You're a murderer. No, you can call them a murderer. But, like, there's different classes of felony. It's just like there's different classes of misdemeanors.

Pizza. Blade pizza box is class two felony. Like, it should be a class two felony. Like, you are giving bodily fluids to a human being that's just trying to, like, late night deliver pizza. And, like, he didn't ask for period blood. She's, Alessandro said, have you ever heard of women cooking with period blood and giving it to men? No, that is sinister. That's kind of, like, on this podcast when we were talking about the cum jar that was, like, left underneath the, it was a cum jar. So this guy came in a jar and left it underneath the sink and then used it in pancakes.

For his wife. And like that's a felony. No. The way that I, that would be if that woman murdered her husband, we would all support her to get the fuck out of prison. Oh, yeah. Go fund me for her fucking legal fees. I'll break her out of the jail with a fucking male file myself. Facts.

Facts. The way if anyone ever fed me their fucking semen, I would fucking rip them to shred. But you wouldn't care if a poor pizza man. On that note, that's all we have time for today. If you have not subscribed to the show, you can do that from any podcast app wherever you get your pods. Always first at podcast one. Make sure you follow us on socials and make sure you join our Facebook group to connect with us and our community. If you are interested in tour, you can check out Kail's website.

kaleowry.com, go get your tickets. I'm Stasi Schroeder. On my podcast, I share candid updates. from my personal life, chat with some of my best friends about what's going on in our lives, give commentary on the latest pop culture headlines, and sometimes deep dive into random topics I'm obsessed with, like human design. It's a bit all over the place, but that's how I like it. And you will too. Listen to my podcast, Stasi, wherever you get your podcasts. You know the name of the movie you'd like to see. Just stream it for free on Pluto TV,

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