Coffee Convos with Kail Lowry and Lindsie Chrisley - Would You Rather: Valentine's Day Edition

Episode Date: February 13, 2023

CC269: Valentine's day themed bonus episode! Kail and Lindsie reminisce on how Valentine's Day was for them when they were in school. A game of Would You Rather has us thinking about romantic homemade dinners.. who actually wears lingerie for their partner on V-day.. and Kail shares her most memorable Valentine's Day. We also read some Valentine's Day fails from the FB group, and these have us cringing in every emotion. Thank you to our sponsors!Better Help: This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp! Visit BetterHelp.com/coffee today to get 10% off your first monthProgressive: Visit progressive.com to learn moreZocdoc: Go to Zocdoc.com/CONVOS and download the Zocdoc app for FREE

I hate gift giving and receiving receiving gifts is so weird. What do you say? Thank you? This is coffee convos with Kale Lowry and Lindsay Chrisley. I really want you to be in your feels Kale That does not interest me whatsoever. I feel very attacked by you a spirited discussion about motherhood friendship Family and life in the public eye. I'm just not with the fakery anymore. There's a fakery bakery around here Here's Kale and Lindsay It's a coffee combos bonus Good morning. Good morning. I have my prime and I have my coffee and then I also have a water I ran out of boss, but I have this water. So we're in it right now. We're in it

You kind of look like Valentine's inspired. That's what I was going for and I don't at all I look like a Grinch. I look like a Scrooge, but my shirt at least says raise them kind That's like Valentine's Day theme. We're raising kind kids. We want them to be gentlemen We want them to be, you know, sweet and appreciative of their partners when they're adults This shirt is more of like a coral color. I know it's coming on the screen as like orange But it's it's like a coral color and this let me tell you the best thing that I've bought lately is this Dior lip oil This is a lip oil. Okay, stop because I literally just talked to the girl that did my makeup Probably five days ago and I said I need recommendations for lip oils because I've just you know become like this master

Oiler and I'm like I need to try this whole trend of doing a lip oil And so she sent me she was like the do Dior lip oil is the best one But she said there's also a dupe for it. And so she sent me the dupe So I actually have to order both of those today. I will send you the link for the dupe too. It's not it's not sticky at all Like it's like a nice creamy, but like lightweight. It doesn't feel super sticky tacky. I don't like when I'm talking It's not like sticking and I just I fucking you know what I'm talking about Yeah, it's it's not doing any of that. So I am drinking throughout this episode. So if it comes off, it's not the lip oil It's literally me because I have three drinks right here

But I love it. It's so I got the clear one, but the the Applicator is pink. So I think that applicator is what adds like a little bit of a tin, which I'm okay with See, I am a little weird about tints. Okay. Okay. Well, they don't they have ones without tin Okay, so yeah, I'll have to get the one without the tent because if I'm just like doing like an oil day or like a skin care day I don't like any Color whatsoever. It's like give me a good like Clear see look, but no color at all. I just got the tart Multi-purpose oil, I don't know if you've heard of it

But you can literally put it on your body on in your moisturizer in your hair It's literally for anywhere and it's so good and it's vegan. It's like this little purple bottle I'll also send you a link for that so good. No, I don't want a link for that because a 100% Argan oil is Where it's at and you can use that anywhere and Kristen gave me a little Esthetician lesson on it. It's non-commodogenic or something like that. So what the fuck is that break? It's like not gonna break you out or anything like that So it's safe to if you wanted to put it on your face you can put it on your body

You can put it on your hair. What did you say? It's not what non-commodogenic. I think that's how you say it Kristen, how do you what is it non? Non-commodogenic interesting. I love that. Okay, so I need a link for that Lindsay Yeah, so you can literally just order that crap right off of the Amazon and the one that I found is nice because You know like when you're in the shower and you're trying to do like the little dropper to like oil yourself This one has a pump so you can just like pump it like Shampoo or conditioner love it. So yes, I will send you a link for that also While you're sitting there drinking your prime energy drink, let me tell you what happened to me

Okay, so I got that same prime energy drink It's so good went to unbox it yesterday and I was like, oh this box got wet because it's been raining. Whatever No, ma'am. Um It was all empty. They spilled and the lids those those black lids on the top were all busted off Oh, how does that happen? Tell me that you tagged Logan Paul right now. Tell me that you tagged KSI and Logan Paul because I would have and I would have wanted a direct message from them themselves explaining this I was like Wait, I was like really looking forward to trying this but evidently that's not the best flavor

This is the best fucking that's the one I got. This is strawberry water. I have all the flavors and I think I told the story the other day I don't know what who I was talking to or where it was, but I don't know how they got my address I never gave it to them and this is my new house when I moved in When I hadn't even moved in yet and I had a prime box on my porch And I was like, what in the fuck like I just moved here like this is so crazy So I don't know who gave it to them

But like I'm thankful every day because they send this to me and this is by far my favorite flavor Wait, let me tell you I used to get so freaked out when I first First started influencing if that's what you want to call it Because I would get packages and I'm like I never gave this person my address. So how do they know? Like to these companies just check tax records like I have no idea and if they are doing that then I'm officially scared I think that there is Don't quote me on this and I don't want anyone else to let well, maybe I shouldn't else just fucking say it I'm pretty sure there's like a like a website that you can go to that has like

Addresses and stuff for influencers like other influencers can go so if you have like a p.o. Box or Because I don't know why but I think that's how because I don't know who would have given prime my address Very interesting. Wait wall Before we like really get started. I need to ask you if you are a Valentine's person Are you like dressing the whole part even if you're doing nothing? Like when you wake up in the morning on Valentine's Day, are you immediately putting on red or pink and like being with the vibes? Absolutely not. Absolutely the fuck not. I really only do something for my kids

I don't remember the last time I did like a Valentine's Valentine's like I will get my kids cards candies stuff like that Maybe like a little gift like a phone case or something But no, I'm not I'm not dressing up. No, that's not that's not a thing for me when I tell you Valentine's used to be so exciting whenever you were a kid and You wanted to get like the best Valentine's because you don't want someone else to have like better ones than you And I specifically remember going through like my class list and picking out specific Valentine's for people Like I was very intentional with it. I You know didn't want to give a maybe if it was like cat Valentine's and it's like you're perfect

I didn't want to give that to like my enemy And so I needed to make sure that they were getting like an appropriate Car that would really like define how I felt about them Jackson's nothing like that whatsoever. I fill out his Valentine's and he literally doesn't care Um, the only thing he cares about is the candy gram things that come through the school Does your kid's school do that? I don't know. I can't remember if they do the candy grams. I know that the Previously Luxe's classrooms have said like don't put a name for who it's to Only put who it's from because they want to just go like drop them in and I feel like that just takes away like the

Personability if that's like a word of the holiday. It's person of a bummer. I think personable I said personable Personability Yeah, the personal the personable aspect of it and like Luxe wanted to fill them out. I let him I let him just put everybody's names. I don't care and we decorate a little box But no, I don't think that we've done the candy grams. So it's basically like a thing that PTA does I'm sure like other schools do it, but it's a dollar having it. Yeah And like you get like a sucker or something like that and you can just send it to teachers

You can send it to your kid This year we just well in past years But now I just have to be more intentional about it because I have to send a damn paper to Will's house So that he can fill out his and then I was like while your parents are here this weekend have them fill out theirs Because Jackson is like very smart if he sees like writing He knows it's my writing or he knows it's Will's writing So I wanted them to write it so it was you know, very special to him Right

So I know that I like things that were very special to me growing up and it's just so funny That you say that things have changed so much and they don't want like to it's always from That's not how we were raised and that has been something that has changed over time With our kids generation, I agree. It's just like less meaningful almost It's like like shuffle around everybody like drop one in someone's box like it actually I just don't do it. Just don't do it. You know, I know and then I went and then I went and bought Jackson like this little Valentine's box and it looks like a little mailbox thing Has a little slit where like people can put like their Valentine's down in it. That's cute

And he literally tells me yesterday. He's like, well, I can't have that. Why and I'm like, what are you talking about? Like you've had one of these before like why is that thing? And he said no, like we have to decorate these white Like lunch bags or whatever and then everybody has the same one they decorate it and then they drop it in there So I don't know if that's like an inclusion thing where everybody has like the same one Nobody has anything different or something. I have no idea the real world though. So I felt sad because I was like, you know what? I dedicated this time to like go get this stuff like do all this stuff in advance make these Valentine's special for all these kids And now my kid can't even take this thing to school. Also

I did a Valentine's box for Jackson. I always do it and I put like a book a Fortnight card in there. There's a stuffed animal. There's candy Normally I'll do like Slippers or something like that something like, you know, cutie and I always send him to school and Something read and last year he was like, there's just like zero reason that I Need to be fancied up for this day. Oh That's so sad

But it's just I don't know like he likes celebrating at home, but doesn't not care about it at school at all and just so crazy to me Because it was like one of my favorite days of the year. Like I so very looked like was looking forward to Valentine's Day We always did in school Valentine's crosswords, you know, like the the little things that have the Legends that have like the different colors of like Valentine's colors and the new, you know color and the little Heart or whatever, you know, it's like number-coded or whatever odd or even, you know, like those papers They don't do that anymore every I feel like when I was in school even all the way up until like middle school

everything was so Valentine's Day themed like down to the worksheets whatever the lesson plans were like it was like cute. It was cutesy We all decorated our own boxes. I Did we did a shoebox with wallpaper around it so that wouldn't have like Nike on it And you put like a bunch of stickers and stuff on it and it actually came out really cute That was the product every month. They send home They send Luxe home with a project and the February project of the month was the Valentine's Day box And so I hope they get to do something cute and he like I said, he put his name on everything their names on everything so

But I won't one of the girls in his class. I'm not gonna say names. He's like, can you write her name mom? That's so funny. No, I used to you. She told me I had a booger in my nose Okay, well, do you remember also back when we were in school that? If you sent birthday invitations through the school The only way you could send them through the school is if everybody was included So like you couldn't just send birthday invitations to school for like select people. Do you remember this? No, so that is a thing and I'm sure other people are gonna tell me that they do remember this so I never sent birthday party invitations to school because

You just like don't invite the whole class But I do think that that was way more common back when we were growing up Then kids today like you would have like skating rink parties or like bowling alley party and like your whole class came and whatever that's just Not a thing anymore. And I just think about how different Everything is then when we were growing up. We also celebrated Christmas like in school. Yeah, that I do remember that I very much remember Celebrating Christmas and Thanksgiving in school and St. Patrick's Day. So Those were definitely things that we celebrated. I think did we talk about on this podcast?

The birthday party thing and like how you handle other kids going. No, what? Kristen. Okay, so I want to update on that. Oh, yes, we did talk about that. We did talk about that. Yes When you just brought up the birthday party thing I don't know if these specific invitations that Lux got went to everybody in the class or not but I opened up his school folder and he had an invitation to a birthday party and I appreciated it because it was very much on the invitation. It said You know Lux is invited to so-and-so's birthday time in place and then it said admission included for Lux Lowry and then it said

Any additional kid at your own at your own cost or your own Whatever and then it said like Please RSVP by this date. No exceptions if you don't RSVP like she put all the information on there And I actually it I think some people would have taken it as like this is like a really bitchy thing to do But I thought I really appreciated it cuz I was like this lays out exactly what the expectations are and if you don't RSVP Don't even show up And if you're bringing other kids, you just have to pay for them, you know, I think that that's fair Given the fact that I don't remember actually when I was growing up

I don't remember my brother ever going to a birthday party that I was attending ever like right was not a thing I also think it's more common today for parents to stay at birthday parties with their kids Then when we were growing up because it was pretty like Standard that was just like a drop-off situation and then a pickup situation. Yeah, I don't remember my mom staying at birthday Part I don't remember going to a lot of birthday parties actually But when I think the three that I remember which I can specifically name who they were for and what it was My mom didn't stay at them. Yeah, like that was not a thing back then But now I do think that it's more common and I don't know if it's just because

we are more aware of things that happen or If I don't know like I don't know why it's like that But with parents saying I think that that's why you have the overlap with other children Because the parents have the other kids, right? You know and it is hard because I've done a couple of birthday parties that like sky zones and stuff And the packages come with a certain amount of people who can jump So if you're bringing Other children and they weren't invited to the party and they're taking up

You end up paying so much more money So I think that's fair like it's not they can't come and this is like an open free place for them to be able to come and jump or whatever but Pay for those kids who are not invited to the party Yeah, and also pay for them to eat separately because it's not fair for them to be included in like the birthday child Like you whether it's pizza and the cake and whatever it is like that's not fair for the additional kids that weren't really invited to Do that so a hundred percent agree on that

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So we're gonna play a game of would you rather Okay, but I just wanted to say before we do that Everyone can find us on tiktok now. I don't know that we've talked a ton about that You are our tiktok queen not me So They can stitch do at our tiktoks. We will repost them post You can also remix our reels on Instagram Um and do the same so I need to get better about tiktok keel literally harasses me

On a weekly basis about this and I just need to like dedicate time to learn how to do it I'm not good at like learning new things and being open to change As much as I love being a consumer of tiktok I'm like afraid to learn how to do it and I don't know if it's fear that I'm gonna become so invested that I'm Just gonna be tiktoking and no one will be able to get in touch with me Or if it's just like the fear of not knowing what I'm doing Well Kristen texted me last night and I was scrolling on tiktok for like 20 minutes

And I didn't even get back to her text message until like 20 minutes later because I was scrolling on tiktok So you're once you're a consumer of tiktok. It's really hard to get off, but I love tiktok. Um, I don't have a niche though That's like the one thing I will say is that I've kind of treated tiktok like an Instagram sort of because I a Lot of tiktokers have a niche like they are very specific to that thing like if you do Like the mommy and me or the daddy and son ones or you do like very cleaning tiktoks or restocking tiktoks I'm not in any of that. I do kind of a little of everything And I think that's part of the reason why I haven't grown as much as I thought I would

Because I'm just not like people aren't following me for one specific thing Like it's just kind of a fucking free for all but they're just following you Like as if they were following you on Instagram for like, yeah, whatever bullshit you're posting on correct a random Correct. Yes. I need to come up with like what I can do on tiktok that People would want to see I mean I can think of a couple of things But I don't know that I could stay consistent with it because it's like how do people come up with like this con it's amazing to me, but like How people come up with this content of like, okay? Well if I am showing you how I'm organizing my closet or organizing my bathroom

Like bitch, I'm not going back and doing that for a long time. So like that Once that video is done, like that's done. Yeah, so that's why like when I do tiktoks First of all, I have a notes app I have the notes up on my phone and when I get an idea for a tiktok where I see a trend that I want to do I'll type it in my notes app so that I can go back and do it and then if I'm when I'm here and makeup ready one day Sometimes I do it without makeup, but whatever I'll leave it in my drafts to post and then like I'll have like right now I think I have like ten drafts and then they're ready to go for I have eleven drafts right now

Um, and then these are the ones that are like post so like I do film the content as I feel like it And then I can post it whenever you know what I mean? I love that for you I'm gonna I'm gonna get back to you guys on my participation on tiktok So hold me accountable and I'll do it I just never take the time like by the time it gets to the weekend I'm like, I need to like binge grace and Frankie and like I need to Do you love it? Yeah, I watched it a while ago. Oh my god. I love it so much also There's a new show that I'm gonna start watching tonight. It's called stolen youth on Hulu. Did you see the preview for it?

Gonna start watching that so I'll keep you guys updated on that, but here we go Would you rather be gifted candy or gifted flowers? No, they have to come together. There's no separating these two You're giving me candy and flowers without a doubt, but like what kind of flowers? My favorite flowers are my favorite flowers are peonies, but I don't think that anyone has ever actually given me peonies and then candy I'm always accepting chocolate at all times so Doesn't matter what kind Well, I don't like nugget or new get I don't like that

So like if the candy has that I don't want it like Milky Way through musketeers. That's a no But anything with chocolate caramel? Twix Reese's Kit Kat all free game. So I am Probably boosier than you, but we knew this in advance Um, if I had to choose candy or flowers, I'm absolutely choosing the flowers over the candy Because I just don't see like what type of emotional meaning would be Behind a box of chocolates. Okay, that's that's where I'm going with that

Also would prefer both and when we say candy, I'm talking about like edible arrangement. So don't be a cheapo Chocolate covered strawberries and specifically they need to be white chocolate covered strawberries I'm not into the chocolate covered strawberries thing. Like that's just not my vibe I don't like any other chocolate covered fruit. So you know how you can get They'll have I don't know like Chocolate covered pineapple, but no, whatever. I do not like that at nothing about that Appeals to me chocolate covered strawberries white chocolate covered strawberries. Absolutely

That's also something that I used to do with Jackson on Valentine's Day when Will and I were married We would you know, like melt white chocolate and do them It's much cheaper to do them at home than to order them And it's also better at home than to order them unless you're eating them Like on that day when you get them from wherever they're being delivered because once that stuff gets soggy It's just like disgusting. It's not good, but that's gonna be where I'm gonna go with that and also I love roses I love hydrangeas and Gonna be a little bit morbid here

I hate lilies and I think it's because they remind me of funerals I need to look up lilies because like I know what a lily is but I need to see I think it's called like peace lilies or something Like that they smell like a funeral home. Like if you've ever smelled one it literally smells like Death. Oh, they do look that that is very funeral vibes. I'm getting yeah vibes for sure Yeah, and I think a lot of times when you get an arrangement There will be like some filler lilies in there Mm-hmm, and I'm just like not a fan like I throw out the lilies because I Me coming home and feeling like I'm walking in to

View a casket is just like not a vibe for another thing. So I know not at all Okay, second one receive a bunch of meaningless gifts or one thoughtful gift one thoughtful gift Well, it depends like are these bunch of meaningless gifts Something that I'm gonna use because if we're talking like Ugg slippers a pair of pajamas It's like a gift that keeps giving year-round and when it says meaningless. I'm thinking like Um filler like like dollar store like filler stuff. Like that's what I'm thinking when it says meaningful meaningless No, I think like meaningless is like they didn't think of you when they gave you the gift So it's not like specific to something that like you would care about it

Just like I picked up something to like have something but it actually means nothing. Oh, well, I'll take slippers a robe I'll take, you know, a lippy like the lip oil like little things like that. I'm picking that over the one meaningful gift And if you put it, yeah, if you put it in that context, I I'm definitely picking that so I'm picking like You know doesn't have to be brand-ug, but like there are some cute Uggs out there right now that I don't have, you know So like here's some ideas for you. Oh, if anyone here's some ideas Um also a good pair of PJs Absolutely stars above from Target the short set with like the the button down top with like the short sleeve Absolutely game changer. Yes, ma'am

We'll take those we'll take like a lip oil like you said something like that. Love that The one thoughtful gift like what what is it? Is it? We're going somewhere for two days away to a tropical location because yes, I'm picking that over Ugg slippers. Oh See we're on two different wavelengths right now. I'm thinking like a piece of jewelry Maybe like a Pandora bracelet charm. I'm thinking when it says one meaningful gift. That's what I'm talking about but Someone did gift me last Christmas a trip to The bungalow resort in Key Largo

So like to me that was like a meaning like one meaningful gift for two days. You know what I mean, okay? No, I'm thinking like the You know, I also okay. I do need to say this. I prefer An experience over a tangible like holding a gift a hundred percent 100 percent It's kind of like the dinner or like an adventurous date kind of thing I would rather go like on a hike or go You know see a show of some sort then like go to dinner on a date It's like that right like I want to go do an experience versus just like an item

1000 percent which next question Romantic dinner out or be cooked for at home. I'm picking the home-cooked meal and I'm saying this because Previously if you would have asked me this probably a couple months ago. I probably would have picked the dinner out However, this new thing that we're doing where we have this little calendar I'll take a picture of it and post it where we put the menu of the week And then we have one takeout day. I have not wanted fast food Like I had to order the other day when I did something for work at the office And I had to order food and I was so pissed off because I did not want

Restaurant or fast food like I just didn't I wanted to go home and I wanted a meal like a home-cooked meal Okay, so I'm going to second the home-cooked meal if he can cook Yes, and I'm also not helping probably Oh, I'm not gonna clean up either. I might clean up because I can clean Yeah, definitely cook a meal for me at home College me though It was like and I don't know if anybody else experienced this in college but it was always like you would get with your girlfriends and you would talk about like the it places to go for

Valentine's that like did like specific Valentine's celebrate themed celebrations and Will and I would go to all of these nice restaurants But what happened was we'd go to these nice restaurants and I would still be starting when we left then we would be peeling through Like McDonald's Taco Bell You know, whatever and anyone knows like if you go to a super nice restaurant You're still probably hungry when you leave and those portions are this big like first of all, that's an appetizer I don't even think that's an appetizer. Yeah, and like I'm just like trying to be like Full and happy and that's just not getting me full or happy

so I'm gonna choose the meal at home and I know he can cook so That's agreed. That's me Longer a to spice it up or comfy clothes for a more chill vibe. No, I'm going comfortable clothes at all times I never want to wear lingerie Okay, so I am not a fan of lingerie I've had this conversation with someone like multiple times and I'm like it's just so Not the vibes and just also so unrealistic and I'm not into it

But what I am into go ahead is maybe like some some cute Comfies and when I say cute comfies I mean like this would be a more like put together Like matching set like let's think a silk or satin like cute little Yeah, like okay a little mat or like a matching sweatsuit like let's think like 2008 Juicy couture tight velour

You know like very like put together vibes, okay? Well, so Just to touch on the lingerie thing I just want to know for the girlies that do like lingerie because I'm not judging Like how does that go like are you getting in the lingerie before they know that you're getting in the lingerie? And then you're surprising them or is this like a conversation? Like let me go get my lingerie on and then it's gonna be on for three minutes And then he's gonna take it off and like what I guess like are you doing the foreplay in the lingerie? Like what what is the conversation? How is this happening? Are you bringing it to a hotel?

Like is he watching you put it on and then immediately taking like what is that? What is that situation like interesting? Never really thought of that also will say don't love lingerie, but I do love a good matching set that can go like My vibes would be we're gonna kick it and like put together sweatsuits and my makeup is gonna be done And my hair is gonna be done we're gonna have like a romantic dinner at home and Underneath that little matching set. I'm gonna have another matching set on of like lace panties and like oh, yeah

That's a vibe like a lace bra situation like I'm trying to like class it up here I'm not trying to you know be street walking or anything like I'm just trying to be like a classy lady and Show you that I'm putting in this effort and I went the extra mile to get the lace but also What the extra mile to get the lace first of all, I'm a triple D 38 or 40 depending on the fit I need any girlies who are listening to this that are big bust big but please send me links to Matching sets not lingerie, but like matching sets that I can wear because I would love to do that under my clothes

And then it doesn't have to be a conversation because I could literally put it on under my clothes Before even gets home from work and I could be showered and it won't and look normal You know what I mean, and then it's not like this like that's exactly right conversation about like lingerie or what I'm wearing It's like no surprise Bitch when you take it off. It's on you know what I mean like it's a literal surprise It's a literal surprise like I love that so much. So I'm glad that we can all Do that for whoever we're gonna be with on that day. Okay? What is your most memorable Valentine's Day?

We can go Good and happy and like the best or we can go bad Tragic train wreck. I'm gonna say Lincoln is my best Valentine's Day outcome I I Conceived Lincoln on Valentine's Day of 2013 Wow

Yeah, and I know it was that day because it was the only day I saw hobby for like Four or five months because he went to BMT and then he had to go to tech school afterwards So he wasn't home for that time. He didn't come home until after tech school. So Yeah, he was wait down back up But like what did you guys do on that Valentine's Day? Or was that the only memorable part? That was the only memorable part I can remember because I remember flying to Texas my family. We went to go watch him graduate But I don't think the action. I think the graduation was the day before I can't really remember like we were there for like three or four days The only part of the day that I remember is having sex in the hotel. Oh, wow. Well, I hope it was good

Like I don't remember dinner. I don't remember. I don't think we I don't even know if we went out for food Like I have no idea. Okay. Well, I don't have like a most memorable Valentine's Day I am no longer really a Valentine's girl and I don't know if I just like grew out of it And actually I saw something that was like Valentine's Day is just like a Hallmark holiday a hundred and and so then I was like Thinking about it. I was like, yeah, you know what? You're probably right But like I still like getting flowers and like shit. So I'm gonna still like be with this vibe Will and I celebrate a Valentine's Day big like all through college It was always like a to-do always dress up look the real parts

courted me to like these dinners flowers Jewelry, you know, like those things that always was like a vibe for us when we got married I never let anybody watch Jackson really So it was always like we did Valentine's together and it was just like dinner at home or I think we did take out Japanese a lot like for Valentine's Day and ate it at home Did chocolate covered strawberries together and then it was just like flowers and a gift and maybe like Bubble bath. Do you know that we I don't know that we had like special sex or anything

I don't know that I've ever had special sex on Valentine's Day. I don't like can't think of any I was never really like a Valentine like it was never like a big thing for me to like Go get my partner gifts or like do anything like that like I can't ever think of anything like that But um, do you think that Valentine's Day is more for the girls? Like do you think it's more of like a holiday for men to show their appreciation for women? Or do you feel like it should be even because I just maybe I'm a sexist Maybe I am unfair, but I just don't think it's like a men's holiday I don't think that women should get their husbands gifts on Valentine's Day like it's weird

So funny that you asked that because before Jackson's basketball practice this week He was like dad Do you remember like the gifts that you got mom for Valentine's like when she was your Valentine and he was like Mom didn't get you gifts for Valentine's and I'm like no because That's not a thing like no woman is out here just like Mixing it up at the mall Being like oh, I need to get him this Thing like no, I mean, I'm sure people do do it and it's probably like and I did do it in college

Like I for sure did like I would put like I was so weird back then like I was just so Nice and stuff I would put a whole little package thing together on Will's bed for him to like come home to and it would be like an athletic outfit and shoes and a Card and like all these things and then we got married. I was like absolutely not like I'm supposed to be the one getting flowers or a piece of jewelry and a nice meal And I don't know why I ever thought that or like who told me that But I also think it has to do with my raising because I don't remember Like I remember my dad doing stuff for the girls, but I don't remember

It ever being something for the boys, but then I'm kind of hypocritical for saying this I was gonna say the same because that I do so much for with my kids Like I get the cards and candy and chocolate and so they're gonna grow up and expect for their partners to do that for them because their mom Is doing it for them. Yeah, and I'm a woman in their voice, but like it's just different like Because those are our kids so it's different, but also I agree like we are hypocrites of Valentine's Day Wait, okay, so we are Valentine hypocrites What is the worst gift that you have ever received on Valentine's Day? I will tell you what I think is a selfish gift on Valentine's Day

What and I am so specific about this for someone to gift you lingerie because bitch That is not for me. That is for you. Oh, that's a good one That is not for me. Like I don't want to wear that shouldn't want but floss up my asshole I'm about to be 31. Like I don't want but floss in my like and how do you know? I want to wear a first of all, what if it doesn't fit and then I'm embarrassed and now you've ruined both of our days Yeah, no like literally like if you want to get me that just know that you're gifting yourself that Don't count that as my don't count that as my gift You can do that in addition to whatever you're getting for me

But that is not a gift for me. That is a gift for yourself Yes, like and I feel like we all should like start a riot about this because if If and I mean, I don't know maybe there are some women out there that love to have like a good lingerie Collection and like they are committed to it But you have to know that that's like one of the things for me about gift-giving no matter what holiday it is or what occasion it is for me if you're buying any sort of gift for somebody You need to know who you're gifting to and what their interests are because if you're giving them like one time I told the story already. This was a Christmas gift

I really wanted to just like scream because it's you didn't read the room. You didn't know me He gifted me a diamond tennis bracelet and I don't wear anything like that Like that's like someone giving me lingerie for Valentine's Day. That is not for me. That is not we don't know me I can't even imagine you wearing a diamond tennis bracelet But I think this is like a stupid like thing that men do where they get in a fluster and they're like I don't know what to get and so you can never go wrong with a diamond So Probably it's gonna be that it's like, okay. Well, if you can never go wrong with a diamond then make sure it's the right one

Like don't get me diamond tennis bracelets if I've never worn a bracelet but if you want to get me diamond earrings like studs that I can wear or like add to my necklace with like a little I don't fucking know Pendant a pen you know something something like first of all I am very Weird about jewel. I'm weird about everything but like jewelry specifically Um, I am such a minimalist when it comes to that like and when I say minimalist Do I wear a decent amount of jewelry? Yes, but the pieces that I wear are like dainty small

um Don't try to show up with something gaudy because Definitely not wearing it and I'm giving it back to you because I don't want you wasting your money Oh, I give the diamond I give the diamond tennis bracelet back now. It's like I don't I don't want this like this is go get your money back I don't I do not have any there's two violent There's two valentines that I remember one was my ex-boyfriend Matt in high school and the other one is Conceiving Lincoln outside of those two specifically

I can't remember any valentines So I can't tell you the worst gift that I ever received on valentine's day because I literally don't remember Have you ever given a bad gift? I guess my bad gift would be not giving one. Yeah Yeah, I can't there's I can't think of anything off the top of my head Like valentine's day is not a memorable thing for me. Like it's just like not a thing Okay What if if you like really had okay? Well, if it's not a thing Would you be pissed off knowing it's valentine's day and then

You just like didn't get anything or like no one told you happy valentine like your partner like didn't tell you happy valentine's day Um, you didn't get anything special like they didn't cook you a special meal Um, no card nothing First of all kill. I know you well enough to know that that would be something you would put in the group text This asshole like did not do anything Oh, I'm sure I've complained about it just because it was like a lack of appreciation or like a lack of thought Um, because I was with chris for like five years and there's not Oh, you know what? You know what he gifted me one time

Actually wait now that i'm thinking about this Both dom and chris two different years Gifted me the same thing. Was it crocs? No, it was those, um, love stories that you can make and like edit and like have your own characters and like tell the story about love Um, what are those books called? There's like a book where you like write your love story in it I don't know, but i'm gonna find it. They both gifted me that on two different years Um, I think I still have the one that chris gifted me floating around here somewhere Um, and it was called low on love and it was like it was a story like our love story and on every page

I would laugh so hard if if somebody else came out of the woodworks and was like he gifted me the same thing. Um, and it was like Um, you know The first page was like if you're ever questioning my love for you read this book And it was like all of the things in the book and it was um, it was like our characters in it Um, and then dom gifted me the same thing. I want to say like the year prior That is a good indication That it was bad news. Um

Okay, that it was bad news. Yeah Zock doc has been a lifesaver for us this nasty sick season. Um, and we will definitely use this all year It's perfect. Um, if you've had a health issue that you've kind of been stewing on or you're just sick from you know The weather being around germy kids, whatever the case may be Um, your group chat's not going to give you the advice you need or the medical professional help So maybe skip the group chat and go straight to the zock doc app because it's free I absolutely love zock doc so much. We are all guilty of trying to diagnose ourselves or talk to our friends about it

And I just love that zock doc is so easy. They're basically like my friend and they help you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care that you need and deliver the type of experience that you want and sometimes going to the doctor's office and feeling like you aren't the center of attention is really annoying and You don't feel like that with zock doc. So it's very special to me Zock doc is the only free app that lets you find and book doctors who are patient reviewed Take your insurance are available when you need them and treat almost every condition under the sun Go to zock doc com slash combos and download the zock doc app for free Then find in book a top rated doctor today. Many are available within 24 hours and I can attest to this when I did this last weekend

I was literally speaking with a doctor within probably 10 to 12 minutes. It was amazing That's zoc doc.com slash combos zock doc.com slash combos Okay, I need to know if you were picking like let's say You could just like pick anything for valentine's day. Mm-hmm. What are you? What are you picking? I'm gonna go on a trip. I'm gonna go on a valentine's inspired Vacation, okay, so I think that that is really romantic and really sweet if it's a romantic and sweet trip But like if you're trying to take me to like a water park. No, absolutely. No, like we're not doing that That's not the thing

Maybe like a cabin with like a hot tub and like a home cooked meal something like that. I can get behind those vibes Maybe like let's go to Mexico for two days Totally will do that sign me up all day. Yeah Um, also if that's not our budget and we're not doing that then let's just go get couples massage Cook dinner at home. Mm-hmm Snuggle and call it a night. I think a massage would be my second up my second choice Actually, that might even if if we're if we're worried about budgets. I think the massage is going to be my first choice Um, I always love a good massage. I also

if someone Gifted me like a blowout like got me a gift card to get a blowout or get my nails done or something Like those are practical things that I would really love too So for talking care stuff. Yeah, like self-care stuff that like we don't even necessarily have to do it together and I'm happy Um, but also if we did it together like I would be I would be so happy if we did You know like couples massages or something like that like that That would be like quality time. So it's you know, I'm getting a massage and we're doing something together, you know Okay

So we're gonna do these next two really quick. Okay. Do you feel obligated to have sex on valentine's day with your partner? I feel like you shouldn't be celebrating valentine's day with the person If you're not having sex with them. I feel like that's like such a romantic holiday that It's all based around like romance and love That like if you're not wanting to do that then you probably you're in the wrong place So that's a good indication. Here's my thought on that. I think Part of me is like Relationships goes through relationships go through like ebbs and flows, right?

Like you're you go through periods where you're like In love with them can't keep your hands off of them Then you go through periods of time where you're just like Not super into it and like I think that's completely normal slash common slash Just a part of life But if you're in a place in the marriage or the relationship where you're kind of like not really into each other Like you're not really in love You could either use the holiday to reconnect and like if you guys are both on the same page with that

And you're wanting to like kind of reconnect and get back to that and try to have sex But if you're in a place where it's like I'm not really into my partner right now I don't necessarily think that that means like you don't need to be together But I definitely think it's like okay. Well, here's like a small token of my appreciation We're not on the same page right now But I still want you to know like you are my partner in this life and you know I think there's definitely a way to appreciate your partner even if you're in a place in the marriage or relationship where you're Not in like the in love in lust phase

Does that make sense? I mean, I agree. I just think that that would be I agree with everything that you just said and I think that that is super realistic But I also think that know that ahead of time And the room of where you are. Yes, and don't put yourself in a situation This goes back to the same thing I said about um, I don't know I said this on the southern tea about Girls going on dates with men just for like free meals That's so fucking weird to me and it's about like the intention, right?

So if the intention is wrong With celebrating valentine's day for you to get like just have somebody to celebrate with that You're not like really feeling it whatever I feel like just go on a date with them on another time not like a special Day whenever I was dating Malik. Um, he told me that like the The year prior to the one like I'm sure he did something for me on valentine's day I don't really remember But he was telling me like the year prior for valentine's day Some girl like randomly hit him up to see what he was doing for valentine's day

And like it's always funny to me when I hear about like exes or like their experiences or whatever and I was like That is so weird to me like I would never hit someone up to celebrate a holiday Just to have someone to celebrate with because it doesn't even like what is the purpose like where's not I don't want to go to dinner with someone on valentine's day that i'm not fucking or dating like that's weird Unless it's like a gallantines like if it's like a girl's thing like fine But i'm not going on a date with someone for valentine's day that i'm not even seeing that's weird to me I'm not getting a free meal from that. It makes me feel uncomfortable That's so weird

Absolutely not. Um, and I think the last one Do you actually like romantic dates or would you rather be at home? I I think we've already very much answered that both of us like Being at home Okay, so there was something that I saw that I just like briefly have to mention That's okay. So the book that you were talking about was love book online Yes.com. Yes That's really cute actually. Um, it was really cute

It was just funny that they hated each other so much and they did the same thing that they both did it also Have you tried any of? Courtney Kardashian's products. I think it's called like lemmy or something. I have not I would like to but I have not Okay, so someone sent me this thing and they were like you guys are always talking about kitties on coffee combos And there's a product on there called lemmy pur and it's a vaginal health gummy Okay And I was like, okay. Well, let me like go and read about it. So it says that The it's the perfect lemmy clinically studied probiotics specifically target vaginal microbiome health and ph levels to support freshness

And odor plus they add vitamin c for antioxidant and pro collagen benefits and real pineapple extract um So I'm gonna I'm gonna try these. Um, someone said that they're they really work So I'm like, I don't know like let me try. Let's give it a let's give it a shot Okay, so in the facebook group Um, did you see the picture that was posted at the kitty carpet? I did not Okay, so it is I'm gonna I'm gonna paint the scene

it is a red furry heart and it is a reusable Downstairs to pay What it's a reusable downstairs to pay like you basically like Stick it on your kitty and it's a kitty carpet. What the fuck did anyone what does anyone need that for? Well, I don't know. Maybe they were just like feeling like I tell you what happened when lux walked it on me in the shower No, what? Oh, were you doing that dick thing?

Wait, I told someone about that I told someone about not I told someone about like the the dick that sticks to the wall. Yeah, yeah, yeah I mean, I don't care if you tell them I have one other thing and they were like Who enjoys humping a wall? No, you're not humping the wall. You're just like learning to throw it back you know like giving it back to them, but so I'm in the shower and My my shower is completely glass and like my one of my problems is that my kids don't knock like they just don't knock when they Do anything and like we're working on it

But so lux comes in he wants me to like probably open a fucking fruit snack or something. I don't know And he's he does or says something funny and I start laughing And he's like What is why is that hairy thing moving? And I said what And he pointed at it. He's like, why is that hairy thing moving when you laugh? And I was like, oh my god. I was like my vagina

And he was like, that's your vagina. I said, let's get the fuck out. Get out of the bathroom Wait, okay, so He said it moved when I laughed I've talked about growing up and like how We basically were just like rogue humans and never knocked never did anything um I'm very intentional about that with jackson and about like personal and private space Mm-hmm, and I would be mortified if I was having a conversation with my son and I was butt ass naked and he was like What's that hairy thing moving?

I'd be mortified. No, I was absolutely mortified. Okay. So does that are you saying because I also talked about on the southern tea Are like do you get to a point where you outgrow a bald vagina? And that makes me want to ask you Did you outgrow it like are you no longer? It's not that it's just I haven't Had the time to maintain like I keep it Trimmed and like shaped up, but I have not shaved it bald in a long time probably like three weeks Um, I probably shave it once a month. I just run out of time or I don't have enough time to do it Um, like last night I trimmed it up and I

Shaped it up, but I didn't shave it bald, but like I still like a bald cat. You know what I mean? Like I like yeah, I'm definitely just don't have time I'm definitely one for a bald cat, but I just wonder, you know, like how do women the conversation was basically like How do you evolve to like a landing strip or just like bikini? Like how does that happen over time? And at what age does that happen? Um, because I'm I'm like I could try a landing strip, but I would not love that Honestly, that would be more work to like make sure it's like a perfect landing strip

Like we want to be we want it to be a nice landing a smooth landing I also talked about that and like how do you You know like make sure the lanes are Even and nice and straight. Yeah, like you would need to go to a barber to have them like shape up your cat Okay, well, I I love that Lux called you out for that and like that makes me love him so much more Coffee combos podcast is brought to you by progressive insurance. Let's face it Sometimes multitasking can be overwhelming like when your favorite podcast is playing and the person next to you is talking And your car fan is blasting all while you're trying to find the perfect parking spot

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Press play on comparing auto rates quote at progressive com to join the over 29 million drivers who trust progressive Progressive casualty insurance company and affiliates comparison rates not available in all states or situations prices vary based on how you buy Okay, so this person wrote in on the facebook and said this is a valentine's day gone wrong First off, I love you ladies so much and listen every week back when I was pregnant with my first child my then boyfriend now x Had been out with his friends the night before valentine's day out at the bar all night and my boyfriend was acting strange the next day We were one of those corny couples with the shared facebook account Ick and I noticed that he randomly blocked this girl that I had never heard of I just had a real bad feeling in my gut something was off and I was sure he cheated on me with this random girl

That was now blocked so on valentine's day. I was seven months pregnant and messaged this girl How do you know my boyfriend did he cheat on me etc? The girl told me he hadn't cheated on me But he had a whole ass kid with her two years before I met him He kept a whole ass kid a secret from me and I found out on valentine's day He never paid child support for this kid and would never acknowledge this kid We stayed together for a few years after that, but I finally left him for good in 2016 I've hated valentine's day ever since until I met my now amazing fiance in 2017. Okay

I have zero respect for a man. Yeah No, that's not a thing if you and here's the thing like you get in a relationship with another woman and you have a whole ass kid and Maybe that would have worked like back in the day and you would have gotten away with it but with social media DNA tests like Technology the way it is today. You're not getting away with that

So the fact that any person would be dumb enough to even try to ride that lie is stupid and I have zero respect for any person Who will not acknowledge what they helped create? That's really weird to me to lie about it in a relationship um Or if you're dating someone like how do you get out of that? Like what do you how when it comes about like how do you explain why you would keep that a secret in a relationship or like my friend my girlfriend's here visiting from Vegas and she was just telling us about um

her son reaching out to his father um and His wife didn't know that his 18. Well, I mean he's 21 now your old son existed So he's been living a lie in his marriage for like 20 years. Like I don't understand that That's so insane. Um Yeah, I I don't understand that either. I also just want to Go back to the part about the shared facebook account. I don't know if it's just me Or if everybody else also thinks this but when I see a shared facebook account, I immediately go. Who's the cheater? Who is the cheater? That's that's what I think

could be completely Not happening. I don't know circumstances, but I'm being judge judy when I see that I'm like somebody cheated and They're not trustworthy enough to have their own facebook account. So that's why they have a shared one Um, I think if you're having a shared account, we need to know like more reasons why you're having a shared account Like this is a business like what it's just it's so weird. Like why why would you want? Like I understand like the no secrets thing to know

I mean, but just because you're so here's the thing. I saw this tick talk and it was like this guy um giving relationship advice and he was saying um Like if you have to do things like that, there's no trust in a relationship But like you should trust your partner enough to have their own things and maybe even have access to them But not feel like you need to go search your partner's stuff Or that you have to hide it or you have to combine everything because of it So like that's really weird to me that I would never share an account with somebody ever I don't care what the circumstances are. It's never happening

1000% agree. Okay. Another worse valentine's day ever Okay, okay. I was 17 my boyfriend of a year broke up with me over the phone while I was visiting my dad in another city First of all over the phone breakups. I just have to pause Don't be a coward like literally break up with someone to their face. Um An hour later my mother called sobbing because she had a knockdown drag out fight with her boyfriend My stepmom had been verbally abused and then called into work By her heinous boss and it was a Saturday My poor shell shocked father dealing with three crying women tried to make it better by taking my stepmom and I to a movie at the end of the day

My stepmom was really late getting out of work So we missed the movie and we that we wanted to see so we settled for something none of us really cared about Just said that we'd have something to do After the movie we went to dinner my dad dropped my stepmom and I off in front of the restaurant He pulled around the corner to park and was hit by an oncoming car He was fine, but the car was totaled Okay, this is a good indication when stuff like this starts happening and the day starts like that I think that's a good indication not to like try to make it better because it's honestly just gonna get worse

This story is a direct reflection of that um When my day starts off shitty within like the first hour of the day, I'm Honestly, probably taking a self care day. Like I'm I'm canceling everything Well, you just don't want to like let it keep getting keep getting worse. You know what I mean? Like that's yeah, that would have been a no for me and like if I got We've all had those days where Literally every single thing goes wrong. Yeah, we've all had there's no worse feeling

but to have Every single thing go wrong and there also be like emotional aspects involved in that on a valentine's day Count me out. I also wait. I wanted to go back and just say to you that I am definitely the type of person that um associates Bad moments or like memories with

smells Yes, um, or also like specific dates. Like I can remember Like not like going on a date but like a date on the calendar. Like I can remember like specific Dates and can quote them like oh, do you remember on such and such date that you did this? Um, so Lindsay's toxic No one should try to bamboozle me or do something bad on an actual like holiday that I like and

joy and celebrating because if you Literally fuck up Christmas for me by doing something bad Absolutely not Absolutely the fuck not like no not happening. Okay Um one more of the worst valentine's day ever and then we're gonna do foul play. Okay I was in a long-distance relationship That was going downhill and it needed to end like yesterday We had been together for more than two years

So I felt I owed him the respect of having a difficult breakup conversation in person good for you Yeah, the problem once I realized it was time to break up the first available weekend for me to visit Happen to be valentine's day Fuck Yeah, that was where you went wrong on this one. He ended up taking me out for a disastrous dinner It was so bad the waitress actually asked if I was okay I wound up breaking up with him the next day on the actual holiday My train home wasn't until the next day. So I had to stay at his place after dumping him. Okay every part of this execution was wrong

Wait, so like would you hold off on the breakup until after valentine's day then? I would have never gone knowing that the first available time was valentine's day and honestly, I think After I just said don't break up over the phone. I'm gonna be a hypocrite again Yes, I agree. This would be a circumstance where you have to break up over the phone because I'm not even making the effort to come out there And I'm not spending the money to come out there Like thank you for the two years that we had together. I hope there were some good times mixed with the craziness But like you're not for me and I'm not gonna come spend no fuck no absolutely not and honestly It was already a long distance relationship anyway. So I feel like that's where in those situations

You can get away with doing things over the phone I'm talking about if you're living 15 minutes from someone and you're going through a breakup Have the conversation in person like don't be a coward. So can I read you a breakup text that I sent to someone? Yes Okay. Oh god, this is so good. Oh God, this is so good Okay, this was the day before my birthday last year March 13th. Listen, I should have done this sooner But I thought I could make it work before we do anything further or do anything for my birthday

I have to tell you my heart is not in this. I love you, but I cannot be with you No amount of talking will change my mind. This has been heavy on my heart for a while. Please respect this and give me space See, I very much respect that but we lived 15 minutes from each other So I should have said it in person But I just felt like if we said it in person I would have taken it back and we would have figured out a way to make it work and I wasn't happy See, I feel like if you're gonna have the in-person conversation you have to be strong enough to stand by Where you're at. You can't be manipulated or bamboozled or emotionally

Pulled in a direction that changes the direction that you went into that conversation His response Oh god after FaceTiming me immediately after I started crying. He was crying. He said First he said you got it. That was the initial text back. You got it. That's it And then about an hour later. He said he had FaceTiming me. We were both crying and then I was like, I'll call you back Like this isn't it like I can't FaceTime you he said I'm feel really broken right now And I'm fully understanding of how you feel I hope that you find real love and real connections and have the best life for real. Thank you for everything you did for me

Thank you for being you you don't have to call me back after you drop off the boys. You don't have to explain anything else I'm just so hurt and in denial. I know this has been on your heart for a while and there's nothing that can change that I'm losing my voice. I'm losing you and that's the hardest thing I'm dealing with but I'm going to be okay Um, and that was our what I thought was the end of our breakup, but then it ended up going South um, but that was like for me I had to do it that way. I think it's by circumstance honestly to me I always prefer in-person conversations because I feel like you can read someone's emotions. I feel like um, nothing can be misinterpreted

over text message, and I think that that's a lot of times why we stand behind using text message because it's an easy way to do hard things that you don't want to have to face and so um, I have been very guilty of doing that and through therapy I have learned that hard conversations aren't meant to to have over text message and And chances are if you're choosing to resort to using text to do it It's because you're not actually in the place that you need to be and to have it. So Oh, okay. Okay. That makes sense. I mean I Also was this was the beginning of my spiral last year. Mm-hmm

Like I was spiraling that same time um, it should have been in person, but I also like I said before I was just like afraid of it Being one of those things where like we talk ourselves out of the breakup once it's in person because we you know We would have a good time in person sometimes and it was just like I feel this way and I don't want to go back. I don't want to lie to myself or try to make it work when I know I need to not be here. I need to not be in this I will say though

I do think that there is a place for text message And if you are willing to cold you are willing to send how you feel And cold turkey and no back and forth then there's a place for that. Yes, I think If if it's not like that then you can't use you can't use text in this specific situation though with this This girl. I don't know who wrote this in. I'm also not attacking any person. I'm just saying I feel like it Should have been a indication if the first time to be able to see each other was valentine's day weekend And that to me would have been okay. I really need to think about this. I need to muster up the courage to

Send a text to be like hey before I travel and do this I want to let you know kind of like what you said like how I'm feeling where I'm at Why I'm no longer feeling emotionally invested in this anymore Um, I certainly would have definitely not going out You know further to ever even have been a disastrous dinner on valentine's day weekend Um, and I certainly wouldn't have broken up and then stayed at the damn person's place Right like that was that's not That for me. I would have probably left and we would have been still together like that would have been just like a weird

That's not no. Fuck. No. Absolutely. That's not a thing. Okay. Okay foul play um Romantic getaway gone wrong. Oh shit. I was hoping hey ladies. I love you and look forward to this podcast every week I have a foul play in time for the bonus episode Kristen requested for my fiance and I think Vacation to Las Vegas. It was our first and only vacation. We have what we will have as an engaged couple So of course we wanted to have a romantic getaway It was the very opposite. I'm an introverse I'm an introvert with severe anxiety and Vegas was just not for me

All of the people the fill down to seeing a guy shit on the sidewalk in the middle of the strip big Nope, the worst was yet to come on our second to last night there We decided to look up a restaurant and got dinner before going to bed early I woke up at 2 a.m. A little nauseous, but I knew I had to poop So I tried to brush off the feeling after 30 minutes went by and I knew I had to shit So I went to the bathroom normal poop. I thought I was done Nope, my assholes suddenly turned into a firehouse and I could not stop I have gluten intolerance and IBS. So I brushed it off

3 30 a.m. Rolls around and my fiance is yelling outside the bathroom door that he needs to shit Now I leave the bathroom so he can do his business knowing I was really risking the security deposit on this room Because I wasn't sure how long I could do without shooting liquid shit out of my ass And it wasn't long. I couldn't wait next thing. I know I'm in the shower puking and shitting Explosively while my fiance is shitting on the toilet and puking into the jacuzzi Y'all ever seen the movie bridesmaids? Yeah, it did look like that Oh, she said yeah, it did be like that lol It went on until about noon. Literally thought we were passing away. I ain't never been sick like that

I swear I could have had a colonoscopy that afternoon if they needed because I was clear laughing my fucking ass off Anyway, I assume we got an early food poisoning from the restaurant We ate at my mom later sent me news article about mass vomiting incident at Vegas school So maybe related to that just in case you want a fucking cherry on top of this shit ass situation on our way home The next day we checked our security system and the fire alarms were going off Nothing like losing all of your insides and then thinking you're losing your house to a fire too Everything turned out. Okay. I hope you enjoyed my foul play and keep being the amazing badass women that you are That is awful

Okay, I have not had stomach bug in a long time and I told you That we're like food poisoning, but I have this like little brief story about My grandmother splitting a hot dog with someone and she got food poisoning and the other person didn't So like I don't know how stuff like that happens if I'm getting food poisoning and I am in a hotel room And someone else also got food poisoning with me immediately. I'm calling downstairs and asking if they have another available room Because the thoughts of being trapped in a place like that with someone because someone else shitting or puking Is going to cause me to more so shit and puke And the thoughts of also having to share a bathroom while someone else is also doing the foul stuff that I'm

Having to do Makes me hurl. I'm not as grossed out as some people are about like throwing up and shitting Um, sometimes with throw up. It's a little weird with like grown-ass kids. However I don't want to hear the sounds. I don't want to hear the sounds of someone throwing up So that is where I draw the line. Remember when I got the stomach bug in chat nuga I immediately got mark allen jr. His own room because I did not want him to hear me shitting and throwing up in the bathroom While i'm falling asleep on the counter Um in the bathroom. So I am with you on that immediately own room. I'm not sharing a room

I don't want someone to have to take care of me and like poor christin. Like I basically shout on her Like oh, and I also just want to say too that if I was thinking of a romantic getaway The last place in the united states of america that I would choose is fucking los vegas. Las vegas Although I want to say I think I want to go there for our next content trip because I found this really cool coffee place But it will not be a valentine's day trip at all Yeah, no, we're not going there for valentine's day, but I mean I would go to vegas with you I think that would be a good time. Uh, we can take we can take my nanny and she would absolutely love that Oh my god, that would be so fun. Okay. The second one for starters. Please keep anonymous

I always love when they preface that but it's so funny because I'm like it's about to get real If any of my friends listen, they will know it's me for sure I've been dating a guy for one and a half years and every time we did the deed or rather attempted He ended up fucking the mattress every single time Why did I stay who knows anyway? We broke up in january, but decided to hook up on valentine's day The one time he actually hits the hole. I got pregnant 20 years later. I have an amazing son. What do you mean? He ends up fucking the mattress. What does that mean? Wait, were they always drunk whenever they were fucking because how does he not know That he's not in

Every time we did the deed or or attempted rather he ended up fucking kill what she's saying is he thought he got in But he didn't and he was fucking the mattress Not her and the one time he did Get in They got pregnant. So is this a pre-ejaculation problem because why the fuck would he What how would you not know? How would you not know that like you're hitting mattress not koochie? That's like dry humping. You know what I mean

I'm I don't really have anything else to say to that other than like Yeah, I'm so sorry that you experienced that if If he Fucked a mattress one time and got off that would be one mattress fucking too many And I'm out period. I'm out for those reasons. I'm out. I'm out ma'am Okay, last foul play

last one When I was 18 and dating my first boyfriend. I had a date that left a lasting memory My parents had just got a puppy and we were going out for the night. So they left me to take care of the pup She was still fairly young So I decided to take her back to my boyfriend's house to avoid keeping her in the crate back in my parents house We were in his room rolling around on his bed when things started to get hot and heavy It didn't take long for the smell of shit to waft into the air hitting us both like a brick wall We were so disgusted and confused where the smell was coming from and why I sat up

And why so I sat up and started looking around for the dog. I didn't see anything from behind me I heard oh my god. Sure enough the dog shit on the bed and I had been rolling around My back and the comfort Work covered in poop Needless to say it left a long lasting memory and I never brought the dog back there with me again I love and appreciate you both so much. Thank you for making me laugh weekly and feeling heard as a parent I'm fucking dead. Have you ever I don't know if you've experienced this because you were with will But when I started getting dogs, um

I was Full adult. I never had a dog in my childhood. So I got bear was my first dog um, and then after that like when I got um Another dog when I was with chris and stuff like when that relationship was new And I had a puppy and I was like potty training and stuff. I was always so embarrassed to like Have to clean up dog shit and dog piss like that weird awkward like potty training It was like embarrassing to me for some reason like I had never done that And so if I rolled around in dog poop and then had like I was with my boyfriend

Like I don't know that I would have been able to talk to him ever again for the sole fact that I would have been It's so embarrassed, but like me shitting on myself as a 30 year old woman Doesn't embarrass me as bad um, it's very embarrassing when your dog shits and you have a boyfriend or Something like over because it's just like makes you feel like you're just like a bad pet parent Like why is your dog like shitting and it's like I don't know the bitch is just like a habitual diarrhea shitter Like I literally have no idea. I don't get embarrassed by it. Um, I will say I told a story with to christen about

Georgia shitting on the bed in the middle of the night when jackson and I were in the bed Absolutely just disgusting and it was like solid turds and then also like mixture of diarrhea And I can tell you right now that I was very alarmed by it being at the foot of the bed If I had ever rolled in dog shit in any state whether a man was in the bed with me or not dogs never getting in the bed again and also Um, I couldn't clean myself enough like I don't know how many showers I would have to take to remedy that situation But like I would not be okay and also let's just say that if you're in a dating situation and you take A dog somewhere and they do this. I I wouldn't be able to apologize enough. I don't know what I would do

It's puppies are a lot of responsibility and I just wouldn't want to take them anywhere because I would feel so out of place Already and then they're just so much work Um No, that would have been a no my boyfriend can come to my house to take care of this dog with me and hang out But I'm not taking no because that's on his bed What if he didn't have a mattress protector and then now there's poop juice on your fucking bed poop juice Bye. I have shit to do like I literally have I have shit to do if you guys have not followed us on at coffee convos podcast on instagram

Make sure you follow us over there. We are also on tiktok You can also find us on any podcast app always hers at podcast one I hope you guys have a great week and we'll talk to you soon. See ya All month long on Pluto TV stream the biggest Tyler Perry movies free Watch your favorites like medias witness protection and medias big happy family join Tyler Perry as he goes on a couples retreat with Sharon leal and why did I get married or Idris Elba and Gabrielle union in the Tyler Perry directed film daddy's little girls Plus Pluto TV has hundreds of channels with thousands more movies and TV shows available on live and on demand Download the free Pluto TV app on all your favorite devices and start streaming now Pluto TV drop in watch free. Thank you