Cognitive Dissonance - Episode 163: Sad Trombones

Episode Date: July 14, 2014

We used a tiny clip of Angel by Sarah McLachlan. You can buy her album here:  

Do you want to get cognitive dissonance streamed to your iPhone or Blackberry? If so, download Stitcher free today at Stitcher.com. Hi, Tom and Cecil, this is Alexi. You were saying there isn't enough stuff in corn shells to have an effect? Well, what about homeopathetics, eh? There's strange poison in it, guys. Homeopoison. Wake up before it's too late.

What the hell? Hi, y'all. Hey, y'all. This is Kenny, and I'm here calling in in regards to a boy who done called earlier asking, what is a fiddler's buck? Well, I'll have you know, a fiddler's buck is done by a fiddler

as he's fiddling on his fiddle, and it's an insignificant brush of the hips so when someone says i don't give a fiddler's fuck they're saying not only do i not give a full thrust of my hips but i don't give a itsy bitsy teeny weeny thrust of my hips it's like saying like saying, not only do I not give a shit, but I don't give an itsy-bitsy, teeny-weeny, green baby shit. Goddamn, boy. Even I knew that. And I got an IQ of 68. Glory Hall. Hey, this is Will from Milwaukee, and I am an atheist. And when people hear I'm an atheist, they always want to ask me about why don't I believe in God. And my belief in God is not really the issue.

The issue for me is my desire to not believe in the devil. No devil. That's my default position. You can't have one without the other. position. You can't have one without the other. So God and Jesus are just collateral damages in my endeavor to enjoy a devil-free existence. Glory Hall. Be advised that this show is not for children, the faint of heart, or the easily offended. The explicit tag is there for a reason. Recording from Glory Hole Studios in Chicago, this is Cognitive Dissonance. Every episode we blast anyone who gets in our way.

We bring critical thinking, skepticism, and irreverence to any topic that makes the news makes it big or makes us mad it's skeptical it's political and there is no welcome matt this is episode 163 of cognitive dissonance and this cecil is uh this is a uh it's an important show we got named by the fine folks at doseose of Rationality. We got named the number one podcast by Dose of Rationality. That's like your mom calling up and saying, like, honey, you're one of my favorite children. I know. It's not like the ones where people actually have to run.

Right. No. Those ones we get trampled and trampled underfoot. I will take what I can get. Okay. Oh, me too. Me too. Finally, the recognition I always wanted.

I'd like to thank the Academy. I'm going to kiss Halle Berry when I accept my award. I'm just saying. I'm just going to run up there. Kanye West is going to be like, wait a minute, I'm going to let you finish. But let me tell you, Scathing Atheist has the to run up there. Kanye West is going to be like, wait a minute, I'm going to let you finish. But let me tell you, Scathing Atheist has the best podcast out there. I would just shrug and be like, yeah, it's pretty good, actually.

That's good. It's good. No, I get it. It turns out that you're right. It's like, yo, I'm going to let you finish. All right. But her mentality is really, really good. Adam Riggs jumps up. Adam Riggs knocks the fucking microphone out of your hand.

Tries to take it out of you. Just like, really? What's happening here? Why are you taking this? There's nobody even to watch the award show. Can you imagine? Cecil, you went to a podcast award show once. I did.

I was not able to attend it, and it turns out it was not televised. Yeah, you know the worst part about that podcast show is I didn't realize it until I was there, but it was gauche to wear your own podcast T-shirt, and it was a rule I hadn't been informed of. And there I am in my cognitive dissonance T-shirt, and I could tell immediately everybody was just like, like, oh, my gosh, are you serious? You're wearing your own fuckingance t-shirt. And I could tell immediately everybody was just like, oh my gosh, are you serious? You're wearing your own fucking podcast t-shirt? And it was funny when they announced our name. I was the only person who was like, yeah.

And everybody's like looking around. I was the only one. I didn't give a shit. I was just like, yeah, motherfucker. Cognitive dissonance, bitch. I said, who's that guy on the other side of the glory hole? It's Jesus. So the first story I want to talk about comes from, unsurprisingly, Right Wing Watch.

Pastor, a religious right event predicts church will soon cure HIV. So Cecil, I read this. It sounds like they've got their top prayerologists on it. They do. They do, absolutely. They've gotten in a circle and they've anointed themselves with oil. They call that a circle joke in other places.

But here, it's their prayerologist. Do you want to hear what this guy has to say? He's fucking awesome, Tom. You've got to hear what this guy has to say. No, but you're going to play it anyway. He's the best. Here, listen. This nation was built on power. And because they are taking power out of it, they are struggling. But thank God for you and I that we are in this nation.

We are taking the revival. We are taking the revival. Until they see power, they will not believe in your God. Until they see power, they will not believe in your God. Until they see power, they will not believe in your God. Now, when they have toiled and they can't find any cure to HIV and they come to the church

and you lay hands and they start walking. Wait, okay. So when does HIV stop you from walking? When you die. So I guess maybe if it brings you back to life. And, you know, I got to admit, like, his premise is fucking foolproof. If I go to church and I actually see some fucking power, then, yeah, man, maybe I would start believing. But every time I've gone to church, I've just seen people sitting around in a church.

I have never seen, like, I've gone to church, I've just seen people sitting around in a church. I've seen electricity. That's the only power I've seen is the power of electricity being turned on. I've seen the power of brownies at their bake sale. I've seen the power of the spaghetti dinner and the pancake breakfast. Okay, let's finish it out real quick because he's got something else to say after that. They will see power. They will all run to the house of God. For the Bible says in the last days, all shall run.

All shall run. They will run. They will come. So, okay. The run. Ravishing man. What a ravishing man he is. But I like that they're running in the last days.

What the fuck is stopping God from curing hiv right now you know i mean like like why is it that we've got to wait until some fucking magical day and for him to be like oh well finally i finally woke up and i've got you know i had i had my cup of coffee and now i'm ready to go about clearing out the world of HIV. What the fuck? Why doesn't he just do it right now? If he's there, if he has the power, as you say, why doesn't he use his power to fucking cure HIV right now? I love that God treats HIV like cleaning the gutters of your house. Right, exactly. It's on the to-do list.

It's on his honey-do list. It's an onerous, it's just a slightly onerous chore you're like ah and like why would God need to cure HIV like it couldn't have existed without him and you also have to wonder too like it's kind of like that moment right

before the ceasefire in a major war and you're like the last soldier that gets shot like you're like the last person that dies of AIDS right before god like god like wednesday you know the 14th at 3 51 p.m cures aids and like your fucking uncle died at like 3 45 and you're just standing there like and then like six minutes later like just spontaneous cheers erupt from across the globe as age aids is just spontaneously cleared and you know everybody's bodies go into fucking remission or what have you and you're staring like at the fucking dead body of your

loved one you're like six fucking minutes really yeah and then six minutes instead of trumpets though from heaven the angels come down with sad trombones there's like the angels just mock you they like pick the body up and like start moving around like a puppet like don't you wish i was alive motherfucker if it's gonna be that absurd though you know when humans are born, it should just say like this life is being filmed in front of a live studio audience. If you're going to make a fucking farce out of it, at least make a fucking farce proper. like the people in this audience though, because I think many of these people who are going to cheer and who are going to really be, you know, moved by this sort of thing really do think that, you know, laying on of hands actually does cure people of stuff. I mean, these are people who, who do believe in the power of God and who do, you know, they witness these miracles,

quote unquote miracles all the time because of, you know, placebo and because of acting and sort of being caught up in the moment and all those things that go into the, uh, the laying on of hands and the feeling of, of, uh, that sort of, you know, it's like, it's like a psychological experiment more than anything else because these people, you know, they feel a little better or they get touched and they, you know, I don't believe the ones that can suddenly walk. I don't believe those. I don't believe that those are real. But, you know, somebody who comes in and says, you know, I'm having these headaches and then

they get touched and they fall over. And then for a couple of days, they don't have the headaches. You know, there is something to be said about the placebo effect. You know what I mean? There's something to be said about those things. It's always subjective symptoms, you know. And it's but the thing is, is there's something to be said about it so that these people use that as their, they use it as a way in which to reinforce their own belief. And I don't think that this is, you know, while we look at this and

say how absurd it is that somebody could think that they could cure HIV or, you know, we're making all these jokes about it. These people don't think that this is that absurd. And this is a full fucking room. And they are absolutely probably going to believe like, yeah, you know, we got to wait for the scientists to toil. You got to wait for them to finish their work. And then once once we've seen the the inferiority of man, only then will God demonstrate his superiority. Right. That's what he's saying in this clip. He's saying when they have toiled and they can't find any cure to HIV and then they come to the church and you lay hands, they start walking, blah, blah, blah. You'll see the power.

So, you know, before God will show the superiority of his might and power and his majesty, the inferiority of man has to first be demonstrated. So, you know, we have to humble ourselves before the Lord. That's really what he's getting at there, right? And until we've properly humbled ourselves before the Lord, you know, the cure won't be found. And, you know, God won't come down and give us the cure. And this is really just a way of staving off the inevitable and moving that goalpost out so that there's always a timeline, but never a timeline. Yeah, right, right. You know, I'm going to set forth these preconditions for God to demonstrate his superiority, but the preconditions will be subjective.

And I'll tell you when they're met. And that way there's no way he can get it wrong. I learned that early on to set expectations really low. I do that with my marriage. And it just, I think it's the best way to go. Well, your wife certainly did. And it just I think it's the best way to go. Well, your wife certainly did. You're all dead.

Oh, be nice. Oh, my son doesn't stand a chance. The whole world's gone gay. Oh, my God. What's happening now? We work hard. We play hard. Everybody dance now. This story comes from Right Wing Watch.

Todd Starnes warns of anti-Duck Dynasty violence, links same-sex marriage to healthy food initiatives. What? You know, when I saw this, I was like, yeah, this is the kind of fucking comedy gold that only Todd Starnes can bring to the table. When you got a fucking dude whose belly is fucking threatening to eat his pants. Yeah. Complaining about healthy food. I know. Man.

You look at it. Just the still photo from the first video. It looks like his shirt is ready to explode from his bulbous fat belly. It just looks like his shirt is ready to open wide up. Let's listen. Now, this is him talking about how Duck Dynasty, Phil Robertson, there's two clips. The first one is about Duck Dynasty and Phil Robertson, mostly. I think there's going to come a time when Christians may be forced to engage in acts of civil disobedience. You know, Rick Warren, the pastor at Saddleback Church, told me that this issue, religious liberty,

is going to be the civil rights issue of our generation. And when you think about that, you know, aside from the shock value of that statement, you know, how does that play out? What does that mean? Well, during the civil rights movement, there were acts of civil disobedience. People were marching in the streets for their rights. And I suspect that we're going to see that in our lifetime.

The Robertsons are devout Christians, and they have very specific beliefs on marriage and things that go against the thought coming out of Hollywood these days. And they tried to penalize them for that. I think people need to understand this, that there are people losing their jobs. They're losing their livelihoods. They're coming under attack because they hold Christian beliefs in this country. In my estimation, that's a form of persecution. And I think, again, if you can take someone like Phil Robertson and say, OK, well, Phil Robertson is preaching hate or he's speaking hate. So eventually that's going to justify violence

against those kinds of people. I don't know that that's the case. Why would you start with that? Yeah. I mean, well, I want to start at the end, which is, you know, he's basically saying that, you know, somehow people are going to be led to violence because Phil Robertson is quote unquote preaching hate. But, you know, I think what they're really doing is just it's just not giving him any quarter. They're saying, look, we just don't want to hear from you anymore. You don't have anything intelligent to say. You don't know what you're talking about.

You're making it seem like you, you know, being gay is a choice. You're making it seem like being gay is less than you're making it seem like being gay is abhorrent. OK, well, we just don't have to listen to that. And somehow that is attacking his rights. No, he has every right to say it. We just don't have he just doesn't have the right to force us to listen to it. Right.

You know, it's funny because you hear that all the time. Like, oh, you know, I can say whatever I want in this country. I have, you know, I have free speech. I can say, yes, you can. You can say whatever you want. But it doesn't mean you can say whatever you want and there will be no repercussions. What that means is that nobody's going to throw your ass in jail. Not that nobody is going to fire you from your job.

Or, you know, it's not like I can go to work and just be like, I love touching your boobs. Let me touch your boobs. And, like, run around and chase people and be like, whoa, free speech. You know, like I would be fired for that. That would be grossly inappropriate to say at work. So like there's shit that you can say and it's fine and no one's going to come arrest you.

And the fucking thought police aren't going to fucking jump out of their black helicopters, throw you in a Gulag. That's true. But there's repercussions. And these are the same people who are always talking. They're like fucking sucking the fucking dick of capitalism in the free market. Oh, I fucking love that shit. And then as soon as capitalism in the free market swings against them.

Right. Like as soon as like the tide of public opinion, which is really what they're decrying here. Right. So in the tide of public opinion, which is analogous to the free market, swings against their ideas like, whoa, I'm being persecuted. It's like, no, it's just that you've got ideas nobody wants to buy, stupid. Yeah. And they're mad buying it. Yeah. And they're mad that nobody wants to buy it. They're mad about that. Right. There's another two minute clip I want to play. We might we might break it in half, but there's another two minute clip I want to play. And it's Todd Starnes again on this uh genie davis or is it gene day i don't know genie davis show whatever it's courtesy of right wing watch why this attack on traditional marriage well i think ultimately i

think the government wants to to control everything and that is the i think that's that's ultimately what's responsible for all of this. The government thinks they know better. And what better way to control than to tear down the family unit? And I think that's what we've seen here. I mean, look at the attacks on men in America. I mean, it's, the Southern Baptist Theological Seminary has an Institute on Biblical Manhood. You know, this idea that men are not allowed to be strong leaders. You know, it's I mean, men are under attack in the country.

You know what I really want to do is get fucking lessons on how to be a man from a big fucking doughy guy with glasses. I know, right? Do a burpee, bitch. Do one burpee. Let's go to the gym and work out yeah you can give me your i don't need to learn about gender roles from fucking captain milk toast you know what i mean like that's not a thing i need to do yeah i i would love actually it would be so much it would be a fucking absolute hoot to go to the southern bigot theological seminary thing or whatever they called it. That's what it's called, too. The Southern bigots.

You should see their mascot. Their mascot is awesome. It's just a dude in blackface. And he wears a noose around his neck. Oh, no. That's terrible. All their cheerleaders are dressed them in Klan outfits. It's the worst cheerleaders ever.

But they do wear the bloomers, so if they jump up, you can't really see anything. Well, the thing is, they got the pointy hats, but then they also have the old-timey pointy bras. Like Madonna from the 90s. But it would be a fucking hoot to go and find out exactly how my manhood is evidently under attack. Like being a man is like under attack. I've never had. Have you ever been attacked for being a man? Dude, this is all this is.

All this is. And, you know, he's going to talk a little bit more about it, but it's all this is just a pushback from feminism where where women are just like, yeah, I would like to be equal. And people are like, oh, my God. They're trying to take everything away. You're just like, what? They just want to be equal. Oh, my God.

I can't believe you want to. You're just like, are you serious? I'm trying to be a strong man. Are you hyperventilating over there? Will you calm down? So let's listen because he's going to jump into feminism. So give him a chance. Calm down.

So let's listen because he's going to jump into feminism. So give him a chance. Women are being told you're a lesser of a person if you stay home and raise your children and take care of your home. That there's something wrong with you. You deserve more than that. Well, you know what? God. I've always found these people, these so-called liberators, the feminists, who are they to decide what a woman should or should not do?

They're the ones putting limitations on how women are supposed to live their lives. The bulk of them are women. That's what I'm saying. Who are they to decide what they should and shouldn't do? I don't know. They have their own free will to decide what they want to do right suddenly we're just like you know women really shouldn't decide what they want to do yeah who are you to make choices about your own life you know i i actually think though that this is a guy that believes that because he doesn't understand that most, that the vast majority of feminists are women.

Like, I think he must really think, like, that this is coming from some other outside, because how else would that even work? Like, he seems to be suggesting that outside forces are influencing women to influence other women. It's like an alien mastermind or something. What's happening here? I don't know. There's still a minute left, so let's listen to him. So I think that we, again, have seen systematically over the past several decades these attacks on traditional gender roles and responsibilities. And the government is stepping in.

That's why you have the government, Mrs. Obama right now, spending millions of our tax dollars trying to tell us what we should and should not eat. Is that a fucking non sequitur or what? No kidding. Holy shit, dude. For real? You know, it's not like the government has never been involved in nutritional education before. Right? I mean, the USDA has a food pyramid, which I guess is actually not very good.

No. The old food pyramid is terrible, actually. Isn't it like eat a million carbs and drink a lot of milk? It's like stuff a box of oats in your mouth every morning, chase it down with a steak, and once in a while eat some broccoli. Like, it's the worst ever. It's the worst. And it's like drink a gallon of fucking, like, vegetable oil. It's absolutely. It's the worst ever this is the worst it's like drink a gallon of fucking like

vegetable oil it's like at the bottom of it it's like it's like built on a pyramid of donuts you know it's just like donuts then cake and then a steak and that's what's at the top of it you know that that's why the base of americans has grown in a pyramidal shape. I'm kidding. It's actually. We all look like heirs. Maybe we shouldn't have had a food pyramid. Maybe America should have had a food stick figure. Maybe we would have been a little bit better off. We'd had a better, better look there.

All right, so there's a little more. Oh, God. What responsibility is that of the federal government to determine if I want a cheeseburger or a Nutter Butter? I'm going to guess you do want a cheeseburger with a Nutter Butter on it. He wants to use the Nutter Butter topping on the cheeseburger. I would like a cheeseburger, hold the bun, and if you could serve that between Nutter Butters, please. Pump some fucking peanut butter on top of that?

Like, I just want it covered in peanut butter. Is there any way you could deep fry that in caramel? And when I eat it, I just want you to punch me the whole time. Is that extra? I'm going to try to eat it around this ball gag. I'm not sure. You're like stuffing it around the edge of the ball gag. It's like crumbs and shit like falling all over.

Eat it. Do you like it now? Do you like it now, little piggy? That's Todd's third weekend Mrs. Obama's the dominator She's in like a leather bra With like a whip Oh god

Interested Fat pale Flaccid bodies All naked She's got like She's got like men all tied up With apples in their mouths All around the room oh god all right there's a little more there's more yeah there's more oh my god no like okay

so now i'm gonna play this out't say anything, but it's like 40 seconds. Listen to how awkward this is. It's even more awkward than any of our shows. What responsibility is that of the federal government to determine if I want a cheeseburger or a Nutter Butter? It's not.

It's not, exactly. It is absolutely not. The land of the free and the home of the brave. That's right. Exactly. So now they're saying, well, you don't really need a mom and a dad. You could have two mommies or two daddies, or you could have a mommy and a daddy who used to be a mommy but now is daddy, thanks to gender reassignment surgery. It's very confusing to the average person.

I'm very confused. Oh, man. Wow. She's just like, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha Questions for Todd Starnes. You know, the one thing that they always talk about is like this sort of they're attacking traditional gender roles. They're attacking these traditional gender roles. Maybe we just are starting to understand and accept different gender roles. Like, is that a possibility other than like we're just attacking them? No, you're not attacking them.

You're just saying that maybe we were mistaken maybe over all this time that we've been you know we've had these traditional sort of patriarchal gender roles then maybe those are the those are not great maybe that's not a great way because maybe that doesn't explore the entire continuum of sexuality and gender maybe what we need is a more open way to fucking look at it other than just fucking a goddamn binary system. Wait, are you suggesting that just because something's traditional doesn't make it better? I know. No kidding, right?

What a concept. You know, it used to be traditional that you get to own people. That was a longstanding tradition that we had, you know? I mean, that was really a longstanding tradition the world has had for the bulk of its time. Right. Like it used to be pretty traditional that people, you know, toiled seven days a week for landowners. That's not really the tradition anymore. Like tradition is a fucking meaningless like traditions are nice. Cecil, I have a lot of traditions. I have family traditions. I have traditions with my friends. I love the traditions in my life.

But if there's a better way to do something, then there's a better way to do something. You know, like during Thanksgiving, like I don't want traditional stuffing. I made stuffing once with fucking tamales. It was better than traditional stuffing. I don't ever want traditional stuffing again. Traditional is not a better. Traditional, it's like the naturalistic fallacy.

Yeah, sure. Absolutely. Yeah. I mean, just fucking try traditional fucking fruitcake and tell me traditions are a good idea. Right.

Or eggnog. Allahu Akbar. Allahu Akbar. Allahu Akbar. So this story comes from the Huffington Post, Islamic State's Soothing System. system. This is actually an editorial piece regarding the terrible crisis going on in Iraq and spilling over cross-border as ISIS seems to be marching largely unimpeded through Iraq and Syria and just announced the forming of an Islamic state, a caliphate. This article, Cecil, I thought was very well written and had some poignant pieces in it. Yeah, absolutely.

I like that the guy's name is Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi. That'd be like calling me Cecil the Chicagoan, I think. I like that. I'm going to call you Cecil the Chicagoan. Cecil the Chicagoan. It kind of gives you like a good mob name. It does, actually. Or Chicago Cecil, I guess. Chicago Cecil, I like that. Yeah, Chicago Cecil would be better. I does, actually. Or Chicago Cecil, I guess.

Chicago Cecil, I like that. Yeah, Chicago Cecil would be better. I'd have to have a more square head, I think. But other than that, I kind of have it all set up. You'd have to have like seven heart attacks is what you'd have to have. That's true. Have a toothpick in your mouth and be having a heart attack right now. Right while you're, and you may be.

It's entirely possible. There's nothing, yeah, there's absolutely nothing that's saying that I'm not having a heart attack right now. The only thing actually preventing you from having a heart attack is that there'd be nobody to edit the show yeah because look if you if if even if we finish the recording if you have a heart attack the show simply cannot be there would be nothing would happen with right you would just take you wouldn't even be able to put these two files together i would have to drive to chicago pick up your computer and shake it yeah You wouldn't even be able to put these two files together. I wouldn't even know where to get the other file. I would have to drive to Chicago, pick up your computer, and shake it.

I hope that the file fell out of it. That's awesome. One of the things that's happening in this article, like you say, it's an editorial. And I think that there's a couple of good things in here. But one of them that I want to talk about, I want to read a little bit from this piece. And this is from the Huffington Post. It says, In a utopian or dystopian schemes, ideology or theology are used to excuse what mostly ends up as power drive, often married with sadism and greed. The ISIS version of Islam promotes a totalitarian view of society in which all human activities are said to come under 7th century Quranic rules.

It's particularly attractive to frustrated and often psychopathic young men seeking the opportunity to dominate others while finding clarity amidst the unsettling ambiguities of life. One thinks of the Nazis and the Bolsheviks. And that's one thing that I guess I never really made the connection with, even though like they're both kind of horrific, but really there is a level of crazy that you have with that Sharia law, with the, you know, the Quranic rules that you just sort of see in the brutality of those other regimes. of those other regimes. And, you know, human beings are brutal to one another. I mean, we are the fucking most brutal thing on the planet. We're brutal to nature and we're brutal to each other. I mean, look at the fucking horrible shit we've done to each other throughout the history of time.

You know, it's all documented. I mean, look at, you know, the stuff that took place in China with the Japanese. Look at the stuff that took place in, you know, in Russia with their own goddamn people after the war. Right. You know, look at what happened to the Jews. Look what happened to the Native Americans in the United States. You know, you just work your way through history and it's just one fucking travesty after another. And, you know, when you stop and think about it and you think about all these people that are, you know, being killed for being adulterers,

all these women that are, you know, getting acid thrown in their face or their wells poisoned because they want to learn a fucking thing. How far off is that now? It's not in the big fucking wide numbers that you would, you know, that you normally see in these big, awful things, but it's, it's no less horrible than those things that happen. It's just happening on a smaller scale and over a wider range. Yeah, this, I mean, this appears to be, you know, just a repeat of a common thread throughout all of history. Right. You know, it's and the religious aspect and the reason I haven't tweeted a whole lot about this or put a lot of out on Facebook about about the folks in ISIS is a because it's not funny. So that's that's the big part. Right. Sure. Yeah. It's hard to make a joke.

I haven't found an article yet that I thought was like, oh, yeah, this will be a hoot. But also because, you know, this is really a terribly complicated situation. And this does seem to be really the worst parts of human nature being fueled by religious excuses. And I don't want to give religion an out here, because I think if the religious excuses were not in play, I think that it would be a lot harder for something like this to move as quickly, particularly in today's environment. I think that these sorts of really human tragedies and travesty stories are really only possible in small chunks of the world now. This isn't going to happen in a first world nation.

This strikes me as literally quite impossible to happen in a first world nation, but in nations that are ruled by a dogmatic religious regime. This is absolutely not even remotely surprising. There's a line in this article that I also thought was particularly telling, and I want to read it because I think it's really the hope. And the hope here, it says, the hope is to marginalize the Mideast until the passage of time, modern communication, humanitarian aid, wider travel and trade can moderate its worst aspects and encourage these tyrannies to become normal countries. And there's something a little insulting about the idea of normalization, but I really don't give a shit about the insulting nature of that comment, because I think that it's true. I

think that, you know, this is a throwback to the seventh century for a reason, because the only way for this sort of ideology and this sort of these mass killings and these, you know, horrible ideas to to really take root and to march in swath across country, the only way that that happens is by taking hold in places that lack the kind of technological and democratic infrastructure that the first world has. That's the bulwark against these sorts of bad ideas and dictatorships and tyrants. These things can happen in places where those protections, which are largely technological and democratic, political and economic in nature, those are really what protect us.

It's not rocket launchers and M-16s. I hope you're as committed to safe sex as you are those abs. I know you're all about that abstinence thing, you know, but I mean, come on. Be Palin, are you serious? Like, you're not going to hook up with, like, before you marry? For real? For real.

For real, for real? For real, for real, for real. So this story comes from Vox.com. Colorado offered free birth control and teen births fell by 40%, as opposed to Mississippi, which offered free abstinence i don't work out for mississippi yeah so good luck with that with the free abstinence yeah

no it turns out you know when you're looking at a package uh and one of them has air and the other one has a condom yeah the condom is vastly more successful at preventing pregnancies yeah you know it's funny i find the correlation in this between the the story about um drugs you remember that drug story where they legalized all these drugs and people kind of just stopped doing they're like i don't really want to do the drugs because it was at this weird place whatever etc and then you know they gave people like clean needles and all this shit that you know that goes with you know they're giving them the drugs so they don't have to you know steal anything and then they're giving a place to do it with clean stuff and like all the problems that sort of

surround drugs just disappeared and the same thing here right it's like you know you give people contraceptions and all the problems that teen births and abortions like you know the thing too read through it's like abortions like those fucking abortions are are dropped dramatically as well so it's like all the different you know problems that happen you know like teen pregnancies and you know a lot of abortions and things like that sort of dwindled right away uh i think it's amazing and i think you know what they should probably try to do is legalize guns in chicago um maybe not i guess that's probably not something. I think maybe that last bit.

You know, they just they just actually it's funny because they did give they lifted the handgun ban in Chicago. In like the last two years. And well, what was there like over the Fourth of July weekend? There was like people murdered. Eighty two people total got fucking shot. That's outrageous. Yeah. They should actually, what they should do is like in Chicago, you know, they give away

free condoms. They should just give away free guns. They should give away free Kevlar is what they should give away at this point. I saw an Onion article that said something like the air in Chicago has now been proven to be mostly bullets. Yeah, it's 75% bullets. Oh, my God. Yeah.

You know, if only there was some way to take a look at this data and say, wow, you know, this is an effective use of time and resources. It saves the state money and then, you know, use that as sort of, I don't know, like, you know, some some kind of experimental. You know, isn't that the whole idea behind the states themselves is that each state does what works for them and then the other states kind of look around and then take the best pieces from each. Here's here's the thing that that people't understand, that people just don't get. Right. You know, the people who are the teens and the people who are going to be having who need this free birth control, the people who need this stuff are people that are on the margins. The people that, you know, either the teens and they're just not going to fucking they're not going to be able to support a kid or they're on the margins and they just don't have the money for the birth control. Those are people that the government's going to have to help support anyway if they make new people.

If they start making new people, you're in it to win it then. Now it's like fucking now it's not just they got to birth the baby, which, you know, the state's going to have to help subsidize. Then they've got to take care of the baby until it's, you know, old enough or until they get stable enough to take care of it on their own. Man, can't you just fucking cut out the middleman and be like, hey, why don't we just start to prevent some of these pregnancies? You know, but the problem is, is they think like I don't even know, like they think like fucking an IUD is like, you know, when a woman has an IUD, it's like a fucking angel comes out and punches the woman in the stomach or something like I don't even know. It's like an IED for babies. Exactly. That's all I think it is, too. It's like a roadside bomb in the stomach or something. I don't even know. Just think it's like an IED for babies. Exactly. That's all I think it is, too.

It's like a roadside bomb in your fallopian tubes. Yeah, as soon as the sperm goes over, it's just like, boom, boom. What was that? Oh, sorry, my IED went off. Yeah, I mean, they just. There's like little flashes of light from inside her vagina. See her dress? She's wearing a dress, and you just see it's like lightning flashing underneath.

No, but seriously, they just don't understand it. They just don't. And they want to make sure that, you know, people stay poor, I think, is more than anything else. I think they just want to make sure that people fucking continue to be poor forever. Because that's really the cycle of poverty is having a child when you can't take care of it. And then you're stuck with this child and you're stuck in this role of being a caretaker when you can't even support yourself. That's not a good thing for anyone. But I, you know, part of me thinks that, you know, it's more of a strategy than anything else. I mean, just wouldn't, doesn't this belie the

difference between a policy based on ideology versus a policy based on pragmatism and realism, right? You know, I mean, ideology says like, well, we don't want kids having sex, so we're just not going to give them any tools or education, and that'll prevent them. And it's like, well, that's Mississippi and Alabama. Like, that's a terrible idea. Colorado's like, yep, kids love some fucking, so let's make sure they can do it without getting pregnant. Kids love some fucking, so let's make sure they can do it without getting pregnant. I got two boys, man, and as soon as they even approach the possibility of being sexually active,

I'm basically going to cover them in condoms. Yeah, exactly. They're going to go out of school. I'm going to sew fucking condoms into their clothes. They're going to have fucking condoms hanging like fucking keychains off of shit. It's going to be fucking condomageddon around those kids. I may wrap them in condoms before they go to school. They just like suffocate on the way. They're not going to reproduce then.

It's a terrible decision. It is altogether right to discriminate against homosexual behavior. This story comes from the independent. Colorful football shoes. And football is really soccer here. Colorful football shoes made World Cup a homosexual abomination, says Russian priest. Because Russian priests always dress so demurely. You can't get any more close to a dress than a Russian Orthodox vestments. Oh, my God.

Are you kidding me? Those guys are fucking rainbow bright with crosses. It's ridiculous. And they're worried about the shoes of soccer players. Yeah, and isn't the Russian, like, mascot like a big gay bear? Like, isn't that? It's like a big dude with a beard? Oh, my God.

You know, he took exception to the brightly colored football shoes. In particular, he said, wearing pink or blue shoes, the squad might as well wear women's knickers or a bra. Added that he was also offended by the, quote, unthinkable hairstyles of some of the players this is a guy looking to be offended unthinkable hairstyles what was someone's hair shaped like a dick like what is your but even that wouldn't be necessarily gay like it'd have to be shaped like a dick and then the next guy's hair would be shaped like a bum and you'd have to like headbutt each other yeah exactly like somebody's like like one shaped like a dick and the other was just a wall with a hole in it.

That's why I only play soccer barefoot with a shaven head. Cause I don't want the Russian Orthodoxy on my shit. You don't want to get in trouble with those guys. Forget about it. Yeah. What a bunch of fucking kill joys. Just cause your life sucks doesn't mean everybody else's life has to suck too. Just like I live in a monochrome existence, so should you.

Yeah, we know Russia looks like a fucking noir movie. You don't have to make us all live in it with you. Podcasters. They live in squalor, destitute, and disenfranchised. They live in squalor, destitute and disenfranchised, eking out an existence as best they can in such desolate places as Chicago. In pairs, but otherwise alone, they suffer from hunger and thirst, barely making it day to day on store-brand chicken wings and weak domestic beer. In the arms of the angel

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allowing them the opportunity to rant unfettered, as nature intended. Please, go to patreon.com backslash dissonance pod today, make a pledge, and help these poor, innocent creatures lead a life worth living. So this story comes from news.discovery.com. Drought spurs interest in water dowsing. Because everybody knows that when you run out of water, the best thing to do is to wander around in the desert with a couple of sticks. you run out of water, the best thing to do is to wander around in the desert with a couple of sticks. Dowsing, if any of you guys don't know, is nonsense where you basically want, I mean, you wander around with a couple of, with a stick that forms a V and you hope that the

V will somehow point to water using the ancient method of bullshit. There's a name for it. Did you see the name for it? Yeah, it's Robdomancy. Robdomancy. I thought that was like being able to make people, other people's muscles bleed. Right. You know, it's funny.

It's like I was thinking of like Uncle Robdo, like that shit you get like when you work so hard, your fucking muscles break down and you get protein in your urine or whatever. Yeah. That sounds like a great time. Oh, my God. I thought one of the comments on our Facebook page was awesome. It says, you know what you're looking at is real when it has Mansi in the name. That's fucking great.

The photo of this is great, too, because it's just got like this dude in overalls looking dubiously at a stick. Like, the fuck am I supposed to do with a stick? Looks like it's from a Twilight Zone or something. It does look like a Twilight Zone photo. Like, it's got that Rod Sterling sort of look to it. There's not a whole lot to say here except for the dowsing is fucking nonsense. Well, I think that, you know, it also goes to show that people that are going to be con artists and take advantage of folks go where there is a need. And there is a need, right?

There's this need for water and especially in great droughts and things like that. And there are people, you know, especially in California, right? California is fucking completely, you know, seeing this massive drought as it stands right now and you know there's a market there's a market for someone to come by and be like hey i'm fucking douse some shit for you i'll be able to find you some water and the people i you know like the article even says it's like look no matter where you drill you just have to go deep enough that's all there is to it like it you know water is there like there's gonna be water yeah on occasion you're not gonna hit it but most of the time you're gonna hit water it just depends on how deep you have to go and this is really just a fucking coin

flip i mean it's not even a coin flip it's less than a coin flip because they have ways now to use you know modern technology to help find water and instead of you know fucking using dowsers oh right you know and the thing is like if the, the dowsers, they're just con men, right? So the guys going out there, they're advertising, they're hucksters, they're getting paid to do this, and they're getting paid to do what anybody can do. They're probably looking at, you know, water table records before they make the appointment.

So somebody calls, they're desperate, they're fucking thirsty, they're worried about their cattle, they're worried about their farms. They're worried about their wells, their kids, their homes. So they call one of these people. And what do they do? They probably look at the water table. They pull some land records out, poke around a little bit, do some preliminary research, grab any old fucking stick, wander out there and say, here it is. X marks the spot. Dig. And if they don't find water, like you said, all they can do is all they have to do is just say, well, just keep digging. Just fucking keep digging.

Like you'll either hit water, you'll hit China. Like one of the other motherfuckers. Or they say something like, oh, well, you know, not everything's 100 percent. And you're like, well, fucking I didn't pay you to fucking not do it. Right. Can you imagine hiring another contractor? Like, yeah. Can you build a patio?

About a 90% chance. Yeah. So you can fix my toilet? Yeah, I got about a 71% chance that I can fix your toilet. The other 29%, your house is going to be filled with sewage. Right?

You see the link at the bottom? Ultimate Revenge, a 16-year-old bullied student feeds tormentors semen-filled cupcakes. Oh, shit. I would only eat like six or seven of those. Man, once I found out they were semen-filled, I'd have a hard time finishing the batch. I'm not saying I wouldn't finish it. Yeah, but I'd have a hard time. I would have a hard time.

A very hard time. Speaking of hard times. This comes from Pink News. A U.S. judge says lesbians can be cured by male soldiers. An American judge has been accused of advocating corrective rape for lesbians. I actually don't think necessarily that that's what his comments are saying. I don't think so either. I read this and I was like, that doesn't seem like what he's saying no i mean he's saying some awful shit yeah oh god yeah he's saying some awful

shit but i don't know that he's being like and then they should rape all the lesbians like i mean he's clearly not saying that what i think he's saying in this is he's basically saying like once these women get around these manly manly men men in the army, their vaginas will just scream, please fuck him. Right, right. That is a fucking ridiculous, awful, reductionist, essentializing, mean-spirited thing to say. It doesn't take into account human sexuality at all. It basically throws human sexuality out the window.

No, actually it doesn't. What it does, I think, more than throwing it out the window is replaces everyone in the world's sexuality with this man's, right? It's basically saying, like, my sexuality is ubiquitous. Like, the way I feel about women is the way women feel about men naturally.

All men feel the same way and all women feel the same way. He's confusing this with a bad porno. Yeah, exactly. That's exactly it. He's just really, he's confusing this with a bad porno. Yeah, exactly. That's exactly it. He's just really, he's confusing this with a bad porno where you're like, like two women are going at it and a dude walks in like, but we're lesbians. Like you pull out like a fucking 40 inch dick and the girls are like, we love the cock. Like, like it's ridiculous.

It's ridiculous. Literally ridiculous. it's ridiculous literally ridiculous yeah this is this is a guy um who said my solution would get the distaff part of our homosexual population off our collective broke back thus giving straight male gis i know back get it you get it a fair shot at converting lesbians and bringing them into the mainstream so um clearly somebody who doesn't understand stuff or people yeah he says and i want to read this it says this is a quote from him shouldn't the overly straight warriors who answer their any spelled country wrong spelled it county their counties call be spared the indignity of showering with other men who achieve lascivious enjoyment from the sight of those lithe naked bodies and who may be tempted to seek more than

a view you know he went on to say these men who lather their strong young american cocks ever so slowly their balls so pert and tight as the cold water forms droplets on their ripped abs and well-defined pectoral muscles. Okay, maybe he didn't say that, but he thought that. I'm going to have to see you in my private chambers. He thought that. I mean, the way that's written, though, doesn't that sound like, I mean, that sounds kind of gay. I don't know what to say. Oh, yeah, man.

It sounds a little gay. It's pretty ridiculous. Like, this is a guy who's worried when he goes to the gym about looking around and seeing a dick. You know what I mean? Like, this is a guy in the fucking locker room who's like, eyes down, eyes down, eyes down. You want answers? I think I'm entitled. You want answers.

I want the truth. You can't handle the truth. So this story comes from the Raw story. Kentucky GOP lawmaker defends Cole. I want the truth. You can't handle the truth. So this story comes from the Raw story. Kentucky GOP lawmaker defends coal. I love this. We all agree. Mars is the same temperature as the Earth. Mars, by the way, guys, Mars is the same temperature as the Earth.

Do you want to hear him say it? I've got to hear it. It's fucking amazing. Okay, so here we go. I don't see you as being one of the enemies. I know you've got a very tough job to do, but as you sit there in your chair with your data, we sit up here with our data and the constituents and stuff behind us.

As you sit there with your city slicker data. With your fucking learning words. With your thinking bits. You scientists with all your thought thinking and your brain stuffs. With your number calculators. And your computer things. I don't want to get into debate about climate change,

but I will just simply point out that I think in academia, we all agree that the temperature on Mars is exactly as it is here. Nobody will dispute that. Yet there are no coal mines on Mars. There's no factories on Mars that I'm aware of. So I think what we're looking at is something much greater than what we're going to do. Is he talking about Mars, Pennsylvania? He must. He must be talking about Mars candy bars.

Mars, Pennsylvania, I think is what he's talking about. Mars, California, and Mars, Texas. All three of those exist. So it's one of those three. It certainly is not Mars, the planet. Yeah. Because Mars, the planet, is about 67 degrees below zero. Yeah.

That is the average surface temperature on Mars. Mars, the planet, is about 67 degrees below zero. Yeah. That is the average surface temperature on Mars. The high temperature, about 68 degrees at noon, and with a low of about 243 degrees below zero at the poles. So just like Earth. You're just like Earth. Remember that day you woke up and the weather person said and today it's gonna be 200 degrees below zero also all life on earth is big exactly like what the fuck like there's like there's like shit that's like gases in our fucking in our atmosphere that freeze like 200 degrees below zero yeah somebody actually put a comment on our Facebook page and I want to read it. They said, my guess is that Senator Smith pretty little head was confused by the bit of Internet fluff that was being passed around last winter to the effect that the current lowest U.S. temperature was lower than, if I recall, the current equatorial Martian temperature, which occasionally happens.

In terms of mean temperature, of course, Mars is much colder. And I think that, you know, like that makes sense, you know, where he clearly got these things mixed up. But, you know, this is a person who's making decisions for us. This is a guy who doesn't know that fucking I mean, this is a guy who doesn't know that fucking Mars is colder. I mean, you know, it's clearly fucking colder, man. Like, I mean, I can't imagine, like, a six-year-old not knowing that. Dude, it's okay if your fucking Uncle Rick at the holiday picnic fucking says something like that, right? And you're like, ah, Uncle Rick, he's an idiot.

Ah, ha, ha. You know, like. That's a good thing. He's a welder. Right. All our welders are going to call in. Yeah, all our welders are pissed off. But, yeah, like like you know if if just

like some random dude says something like that you're like ah whatever random dude right yeah but a fucking lawmaker like a law talking guy like a decision maker and he's using this to defend coal he's using this to say that it doesn't matter how much shit we pump out like how much carbon emission basically we pump out into our environment means nothing it has no effect because they're not mining coal on mars and it's the same temperature it's like that fucking guy who's like yeah well the dinosaurs didn't drive cars it's the same it's the same fucking thing it's the exact same thing as that guy who's basically like here here's a fucking non sequitur. Want to follow this non sequitur?

Because that's going to lead you away from the real fucking argument, which is we're basically face fucking the earth. Right. Exactly. And when these guys are the reason that we're not going to get anything done to fix it. No, I mean, these are these, you know, and the thing is, is like, like when you start talking about all the stuff that's going on in the world and how quickly the temperature is rising and you look at the fucking crazy ice sheets that are melting and the glaciers that are disappearing and all this stuff and there's all this evidence mounting and mounting and mounting and then you just get all these people. people there's just this whole rash of people who are just like that's just some bullshit and you're just like no like i mean i'm like i'm fucking standing on the data pelting you with fucking melting snowballs asshole and no no that's just not it's just not real they just want to keep on sticking their fingers in their ear and keep on basically you know pocketing tons of money

right you know that and that's the reason why this guy is even arguing for this because his constituents want to make sure that they can keep burning coal. Yeah, because I'm sure that there's coal mines and that there's coal power plants and that, you know, coal is a significant part, entire economy away from coal to change our energy infrastructure. People would lose their jobs. That would not be a good thing for those people. I'm not unsympathetic to that. If I woke up tomorrow and somebody was like, yeah, well, we decided title insurance is bad for the environment, so you're fired. They'd be like, but I have a family to feed.

I have a mortgage to make. So I am sympathetic to that. But, you know, the thing that lawmakers and policymakers need to do is have the fucking balls to actually make some long-term decisions about the health and safety and future and economic viability of our country and if they can't do that if all they can do is fucking hoard and protect what they have today yeah then they're fucking everybody harder than they think they are like you know it's it it's like saying yeah don't worry i'll protect your house while you're on vacation and everybody feels good and everybody feels safe and then as soon as you leave for vacation the guy fucking burns your house while you're on vacation and everybody feels good and everybody feels safe. And then as soon as you leave for vacation, the guy fucking burns your house down. It's amazing how few politicians have a long game in place. You know, it's amazing to me how how many politicians there

are out there that just they're always talking about the now. They're always talking about this quarter. And it's it's so surprising to me that no one ever wants to give up anything that they have right now. You know, when you think about anything that hurts, when you think about anything that's difficult, you look at like weight loss, right? You've got to give up something now for benefits later on, right? You've got to give up the taste of the food and eating until you're sated so that you could lose the weight that you need. So you'll feel more healthy, right? It's, it's a difficult process. It's a hard process, which is why it's, there's no real good way to do it other than just the old fashioned tried and true diet and exercise, right? It's just a fucking tough thing to do and it's hard for people to do it and it has good benefits, but nobody

you could see, you know, just by the number of, you know, weight loss classes and weight loss books and weight loss pills and weight loss fucking belts and fucking little rollers you roll on the ground to fucking grind your abs up. All those things exist because people don't want to waste the time now. They don't want to put any effort into it now. They want instant gratification. the problem is that they're making profits now, right? Everybody's making a profit. I'm making a profit. I'm making a profit. I don't want to cut into those profits to look at sustainability and to think about how this company is going to be in 50 years.

I don't give a fuck about 50 years from now. I care about next fucking quarter. And we've got to stop thinking about next quarter and start thinking about the next quarter century or the next century and think about how the world's going to be. I mean, nobody has the long game in mind and it's terrifying to somebody,

even somebody who doesn't have children, who's not continuing his genetic fucking line, looks at this and goes, fuck, this is fucking depressing for the world. So we want to thank our patrons. We want to thank our brand new patrons and all of our other patrons, but we want to thank our patrons. We want to thank our brand new patrons and all of our other patrons. But we want to thank in particular the people who just joined on this week, Chris, Lloyd, Catherine, David in Kentucky, and Lana.

Thank you very much, everyone. We really appreciate all the hard-earned dollars that you pitch at us. Makes us feel loved. So thank you very much. So we got a couple of corrections. One of them was from Thomas, and Thomas sent us a message on Facebook, and then he posted it twice on Facebook. So you really wanted me to see it, so I want to make sure that I talk about it. Since you mentioned PolitiFact in one of your small political discussions, I suggest you take a look at this. PolitiFact is, in fact,

not so factual when it comes to some things. And I watched it, and it was a Rachel Maddow deconstruction about how PolitiFact can be biased. And that's absolutely true. I mean, I, and I, I certainly wouldn't give a PolitiFact a pass when it comes to that stuff.

I'm in my opinion, that's just a jumping point for your research. That's not a way to just be like, I believe what this person says. Like I, I don't do that with anything. Like I don't do that with, I don't know who does that with stuff where they just go to a place and be like, well,

PolitiFact stamped it clear, so I should just follow their direction. I think you read what they say and then you follow the links and sort of do a little bit of research and see if they're telling the truth. Because, you know, there's nothing that says PolitiFact can't lie to you. So, you know, or like you said earlier, Tom, you know, edit by omission. You know, there's ways in which to do that and make it sound weird. So, you know, there's definitely some, you definitely want to do your research when it comes to that. But if you find it on our page, there's a Rachel Maddow thing. She goes 10 minutes or so with PolitiFact. There's a couple of different political checking organizations. Fact Check,

I think, is one of them, too. So do your research. Check around. See what other people say about the same issue. Don't just settle for one thing. But thank you for sending it in. That's something I didn't stress the last time, and it's helpful that you sent it in. Also, Harley sent in a message about the gay Bible verse. It looks like that it's not just in the Old Testament. It is actually in the New Testament, Corinthians 6, 9 through 11. They do talk about condemning homosexuals. Not in the King James Version, though, Tom. They talk about effeminate people. And they say, be not deceived, neither fornicators nor adulterers nor idolaters nor effeminate nor abusers, blah, blah, nor abusers of themselves with mankind. So I think this is like you can't masturbate either. Is that what abusers of themselves? Yeah, abusers of yourself. I don't know.

You know, the thing that drives me nuts is like adulterers. Like how many different people, like religious people, had mistresses? You know, and you're just like, well, you're not going to get into the kingdom of god then right i mean clearly fucking says that right here and also the covetous like fuck you man i can't covet shit yeah this is the thing is like you read it and it's like okay so no one goes to no one goes to the stupid kingdom of god like it's just like nobody gets to go your book is ridiculous and drunker nobody should pay no what's drunk you know i mean it's like okay well what a little drunkards. Nobody should pay attention. What's drunk? You know what I mean?

It's like, okay, well, what? A little drunk? A lot of drunk? Do I have to be drunk many days in a row? Do I have to be drunk at like 9 o'clock on like a Tuesday in a casino in order to be a drunkard? How far do I have to be to be a drunkard? And who gets to choose that? Yeah, is one drunkening enough? Yeah, exactly.

If I had one drunkening? Exactly. Or do I have to be drunk like three days out of seven and abusing yourself is is that body piercing is it tattooing you know what is it right is it masturbating sure because i'm guessing it is is it trying to stuff a cheeseburger in your mouth with a ball gag in there i mean who knows yeah if you can't abuse yourself i'll tell you this much i'm not going to any i don't even want to go there anyway no no but yeah it's it's an important distinction harley and we thank you for it uh this is sexual relationships from david it says

listening the most recent podcast i want to point out that the right generally means by relationship what they mean by relationship or sexual relationship is stuff I have to do slash put up with to blow my load. I thought that was a great definition. I laughed when I read that. That was great. That was awesome. Got a message from Ashley. Ashley with a PhD sent us a message about the last episode when we talked about Capgras syndrome or delusion.

Capgras delusion. Capgras delusion. Yeah, she did. And she wrote a reasonably lengthy email and said, long story short, I don't think that the Oklahoma primary loser has Capgras delusion. She included a link to a YouTube video. So thank you so much for your email and for the clarification and the additional information.

Yeah, I'm going to check this out when I get a chance. I want to see this this video because I think it's you know, that shit looks terrifying to me. And man, that's just I kind of want to watch this, but I don't want to watch it at night. Right. I pretty much have all the delusions. I'm glad I just don't have this message from from some people starting a possible skepticism conference in Eau Claire, Wisconsin. And they asked us if we might want to be involved. So we said we would be.

So we'll keep you informed on that. It would be in August of 2015. So there's plenty of time for planning between now and then. But we'll let you know if it's going to go through and when tickets go on sale and those sorts of things. Got a message about what people shouldn't send us via email. Yeah, we got kind of an interesting email from Jim. He says he was listening to a more recent episode. Got a message about what people shouldn't send us via email. Yeah, we got kind of an interesting email from Jim. He says he was listening to a more recent episode and we were addressing a listener's email.

And then he goes on to say that he didn't feel it was appropriate that somebody ask us medical questions. And this was in reference to the email that we had received, which was like, hey, how come vaccinations get a pass? And we, you know, kind of batted that around a little bit and talked about vaccinations. And there was a comparison made in the email to vaccines and Tylenol. And we addressed that as well. And, you know, Jim, to some degree, you're right. I think that the caller didn't really ask a medical question like, you know, hey, doctor, it hurts when I do this sort of a thing. But, you know, to some degree you're right.

And Cecil and I have been talking about possibly putting together a show where we actually get a legitimate medical professional on to answer some questions and kind of talk about some sacred cow sorts of issues. So, you know, as we get more details and pin that down, we'll let you guys know kind of what we're looking for. We're going to need feedback from the audience in order to do that. Part of it is going to depend on the kind of guests that we can put together in order to do it. But thanks so much, Jim, for the email.

It kind of inspired us to put something together, and we appreciate it. Yeah, and on that note, I think it would be interesting to put together some shows that do have experts that can answer your questions. So to sort of get the ball rolling, if you send us an email at dissonance.podcast.gmail.com and think about sort of the things that you have a difficult time that the skeptics community sort of takes for granted. Like a lot of people take, you know, clearly we take vaccines and say vaccines are proven safe, but some people have a hard time believing that. So if you have a hard time with vaccines or you have a hard time with chiropractic or you have a hard time with acupuncture thinking, well, there might be something to it or there might be something to the vaccine deniers or there might be something to the climate change deniers,

if there's something in the skeptical mindset that you think that you have a hard time sort of wrapping your head around, send us a message and say, I'm not really sure about that. We got a message about that about fluoridation a while back, Tom, where somebody was like, I really don't know. I hear some stuff like what's going on with that. So it would be really cool to collect a group of questions that could be aimed at a certain person and then sort of ask them those questions.

So send us your messages. If you have anything in the skeptical world that you think, you know, I just don't know about that, send us a message and we'll see if we can put together a show based on that. We want to thank Nathan for sending in the glory hole song that he put together. You heard it earlier. We thought it was great. So we want to thank Nathan for putting it together and sending it in.

Adam has a very funny intro this week, and I want to play it. This is Adam Reeks for The Herd Mentality. This is his intro for his podcast, this upcoming, uh, podcast episode 66. So I want to play it. And, uh, we get a little mention from Ray comfort, Ray comfort. Welcome once again to the herd mentality. You must be thrilled with the amount of airtime you're receiving here. You've created an idol. Indeed I have. Now you're actually a big fan of mine I'm told. This is a really funny joke. No it's okay we're amongst friends here. Apparently your team have now worked out how podcasts are delivered. They are searching for something. Did you hear me on episode 27 of Incredulous with Andy Wilson, Jake Farwharton and Andrew Skegg?

Yeah. Your thoughts? It's intellectual suicide. I agree. What about episode 159 of Cognitive Dissonance with Tom and Cecil? It wasn't long ago. How do you think that went? It wasn't a whisper of scientific evidence. No, it's not really their thing. Hard to discuss science when you're laughing that hard at religion. Glorious. I even made a brief appearance on Skeptoid recently.

We're aware of that. Yeah, Friday the 4th of July it was released. Apparently you've listened to the entire back catalogue of Brian's show. Have you learned anything from it? Absolutely nothing. Sounds about right. Now I can't let you go without getting an update on the eight horsepower solid gold butt plug. That which can solve the problems of this nation. Would you class yourself now as a master on the device? I've never said I'm an expert. But as a recreational tool? A tool salvation. Great comfort. Thanks again for coming on the show. Appreciate your time. We wanted to expose the bogus science of evolution.

And if you don't listen to Adam's podcast, you probably should. This kind of incredibly clever editing doesn't do itself. That's for damn sure. At least so I've been told. Yeah, right. Yeah. We also want to thank David for sending in, this is David in Kentucky, one of our latest patrons. And he sent in the funny bumper that you heard in the middle of our show. So we want to thank David in Kentucky for putting this together. We thought it was great. We laughed. And we hope you did, too. It was great.

And, you know, I got to say, I hope it works. Yeah. You know, I guess I guess what I'm saying is pony up. Yeah. I'm a terrible person. So that wraps it up for this week. There's only one show this week, but we're going to have two shows next week for our extra episode. We're hoping we're going to have a guest, but we're not sure we're going to get that person on yet.

So we're not going to tell you who it is. So there, take that. But we hope to have a guest within the with one of the two shows next week, if not in the very near future. So that wraps it up for this week. We're going to leave you, as always, with the Skeptic's Creed. Credulity is not a virtue. It's fortune cookie cutter, mommy issue, hypno-Babylon bullshit. Couched in scientician, double bubble, toil and trouble, pseudo-quasi-alternative alternative acupunctuating pressurized

stereogram pyramidal free energy healing water downward spiral brain dead pan sales pitch late night info docutainment leo pisces cancer cures detox reflex foot massage death and towers tarot cards psychic healing crystal balls Bigfoot Yeti aliens churches mosques and synagogues temples dragons giant worms Atlantis dolphins truthers birthers witches wizards vaccine nuts shaman healers evangelists conspiracy double-speak stigmata nonsense sides. Thrust your hands. Bloody. Evidential.

Conclusive. Doubt even this. The opinions and views expressed in this show are that of the hosts only. Our poorly formed and expressed notions do not represent those of our wives, employers, friends, families, or of the local dairy council. We'll see you next time.