Cognitive Dissonance - Episode 396: Reverse Nazi

Episode Date: January 15, 2018

               

This episode of Cognitive Dissonance is brought to you by our patrons. You fucking rock. Hey Cecil and Tom, I'm about to go and see a movie about aliens and how they connect to the evolution problem and what the Bible has to say about aliens. And I just thought you guys should know that that exists. I'll take notes. Glory hole, motherfuckers. Hi guys, this is Noah I just figured that I'd wish Cecil

a happy birthday because I just thought about it just now and well I can't be off night more than six months so well glory hole motherfuckers later hey Cecil and Tom this is a guy who went and saw that alien movie just got

back or out of the theater from it, and it was batshit fucking crazy. Evolution is to blame for why people think aliens exist, and they're actually demons, and Mormonism was because a demon visited Joseph Smith, and a woman got tormented by demons because she played with a Ouija board. And that, I mean, that's the highlight. It was bonkers.

So Alien Intrusion is what it's called. It was stupid. Glory Hole, motherfuckers. Be advised that this show is not for children, the faint of heart, or the easily offended. The explicit tag is there for a reason. recording live from glory hole studios in chic. This is Cognitive Dissonance. Every episode we blast anyone who gets in our way. We bring critical thinking, skepticism, and irreverence to any topic that makes the news, makes it big, or makes us mad.

It's skeptical. It's political. And there is no welcome at. This is episode 396. You know, there's no welcome at, Tom, but there is a shithole. There is a shithole, and we're in it, buddy. Actually, it's Haiti.

Is Haiti the shithole? It is, but you're not. Or are Haitians shitholes? Well, I think that the problem is that the things that the... We should talk about that right away. Let's just talk about that right now. We don't have a story for it. It's on the Washington Post. It we should talk about that right away. Okay, let's just talk about that right now. Let's talk about that right away.

We don't have a story for it. It's fine. It's on the Washington Post. It's everywhere that you look, always, forever, right now. So in a meeting in the Oval Office, Trump talking about the immigration reform. Basically, it sounds like from all reports,

he kind of blew up. He kind of lost his temper. And as part of that blow up, he asked the question. Was it a rhetorical question? Why is our children not learning?

Do you remember all that? Before I even get there, like, I remember that guy. I remember George W. Bush and his crazy gaffes. And you're like, oh, he's not very smart. And you're like, oh that dipshit cowboy's gonna kill us all he's gonna kill us all you know he had a certain like he had a certain like a dim-witted charm about him he had he had people that you knew were his minders yeah he had people you're like yeah you know george bush isn't that smart rumsfeld's pretty smart though but you But you'd be like, Dick Cheney's driving anyway.

Dick Cheney was evil, but at least he was smart. Yeah. And like, what you got with Trump is a man who's evil and stupid, surrounded by sycophants that are also evil and stupid. Or incompetent. Just incompetent. None of these are mutually exclusive.

We can use and instead of or here, my friend. You're right. And so, all right. So what he asked was, why do we want more people from these shithole countries? Referring to nations of Africa and specifically Haiti. Saying about Haitians, something like, we don't need any more of them. We don't need any more Haitians. Yeah.

And then he suggested that we needed more people from Norway. Who would say that? And he said we would need more people from Norway. Now, I want to say something that I think is important. Sure. Okay.

Many of those countries are shitholes. Yeah. But like the people, it's not the people who live there's fault, right? Yeah. These are people who want to

immigrate away from the shithole. Yeah. I'm right there with you. If somebody said, Tom, are you indifferent to the suffering of people Who live there is fault, right? These are people who want to immigrate away from the shithole. I'm right there with you. If somebody said, Tom, are you indifferent to the suffering of people from shitholes? My answer is no. What I am is empathetic to the fact that they live in a shithole. And I would think to myself, man, if they could not live in a shithole and I have not living in a shithole to provide to you? The answer is not like, fuck them. They're bad people because they come from circumstances

that are less naturally ideal than the circumstances I come from. Yeah. Holy shit. That's racist. And you and I can call certain countries shitholes. You and I aren't the fucking president. Right.

You know, you and I aren't in office. You and I don't have millions of people that listen to what we have to say as as we as if we were representing every single one of those people. That is absolutely ridiculous that somebody could sit in that office and and and even use that terminology. It's so appalling and so abhorrent and so beyond the pale. It's never like you hear it and you're just like, what the fuck is happening? You cannot imagine any, like name a single president from anywhere. And the only person that comes up in my mind is maybe, I think it was Lyndon B was a real foul mouth fucker.

And so was Nixon. I think both of them were foul-mouthed. But they would just say it in private if they thought it. I mean, how are you supposed to have diplomatic relations from a country you just referred to as a shithole? That's your job. You're the chief

diplomat. The thing is that he doesn't care, though. I know he doesn't because he feels like they don't wield any power. Yeah, they don't wield any power, so he doesn't give a shit. But you know, like, he's just such don't wield any power. Yeah, they don't wield any power, so he doesn't give a shit. But you know, like, he's just such a monumentally bad person. Yeah. And like, you know, it was interesting because one of the,

there was a senator, a Republican senator who's from Haiti, who came, you know, her family is from Haiti. She's of Haitian descent. And I read what she had said in response. She's like, look, my fucking family came over here from Haiti. And we worked real fucking hard. And we

are here. We live the American dream. She's now a senator. She's a person? Oh, I know, right? Oh, my God. I know. Oh, my God. Oh, shit. They contribute to fucking society. There's this idea that's embedded behind that. Why do we need people from shithole countries?

That they'll come here and just take shit, right? That they'll come here and there'll be a drain on the system. That they won't come here and they won't work hard and they won't add to the American GDP and they won't add to the American experience. And they won't sort of become part of the larger culture of what it is to be America. There's an idea instead that like something is wrong with them because they come from an area that's poor, right? This is poor shaming.

It's if it's not racist. And I think it is right because he specifically singled out African nations and Haiti, right? What do they have in common? I don't know. Is it a certain melanin? Is it a certain shade of color? Yeah.

Yeah. It's, it's not fucking what I have, which is SPF 183 sunblock. color? Yeah. Yeah. It's not fucking what I have, which is SPF 183 sunblock. Exactly. Yeah. Right. Fucking that blue shit you put in your toilet. You like rub on your skin.

It still doesn't work. You're talking about the Teletubby outfit. I got to wear that just not to get a sunburn. I actually wear the Teletubby outfit and then I cut out the stomach. So it looks like I have a red TV. No, these people are fucking ridiculous. And you know,

the thing is, is like, like he is, he and all of his cronies, nobody's going to care about it. I know. Nobody's going to care about it in his inner circle. They've already not denied it.

Like he came out like, no, we, we, we confirm what he said. Yeah, absolutely. And then all these,

like the first couple of things we read on Twitter, Tom, we're just like, yeah, well America, like, like liberals call this country a shit hole all the time. And he's not allowed to say that about another country.

It's like, like you don't understand that the slur is not against the country. It's against the people that are immigrating. Right. Because he's specifically referring to immigration in that, in that, you know, why do we need people from these countries as if to insinuate that because

they come from a shitty country and I'll be the first to say, Hey, he's a shitty country. I wouldn't want to live it. No. If somebody said, Tom, you want to trade your life for the same life in Haiti?

I'd be like, no, fuck that running. Yeah. And you know, but it's not the people. It's not the people's fault. Some dude who was born in Haiti is on his fucking fault that Haiti has been

poorly run and poor and fucking devastated by natural disasters for fucking years and years sold their soul the devil oh for fuck's sake and you know christy something happened a long time ago in haiti and people might not want to talk about it they were under the heel of the French, you know, Napoleon III and whatever. And they got together and swore a pact to the devil. They said, we will serve you if you'll get us free from the French. It's a true story. I forgot about that. I forgot about that.

Pat Robertson a while back said, Haiti has sold their soul to the devil, and that's why. I forgot about that. Do you all have to sign in blood if you all sold their soul to the devil and that's why. I forgot about that. Do you all have to sign in blood if you all sell your soul to the devil? Like there's like one guy with like a pin and he's pricking everyone's finger and there's this huge piece of paper. It's like toilet paper they're just pulling off.

Rolling it out. The crossroads are really crowded. You're just standing there. Everybody's just wailing away on the X. It's just Ralph Macchio like playing. Everybody is just wailing away on the X. It's just Ralph Macchio. The thing is like, he said they sold their soul. What do they get for it?

Because they still live in hate. You know what I mean? It's like you're like, and we all won the lottery. Yeah. It's like, oh, we sold our soul to the devil. You got a really bad,

you just got screwed over. And then he brought an earthquake. Right. You know, it's funny. He says, nor, nor,

Norway, people should be coming from Norway or something, or we need more Norwegians, which he probably would have says, we need more people from Norway, Norway, but there was a, there's an ambassador.

And I don't know if he's from Norway or not. I think he is maybe the Netherlands. I'm not sure. One of those bald countries up there, both. Yeah. One of the testicle, one of the testicle countries, who,

we played this guy a week ago where they questioned him. They said, hey, you know, what about the people, the American ambassador, and they asked him, what about, you know, you said that they're burning politicians, there's no go zone, and he said that's all fake news, and then they play the thing back for him

and he just walks away. Well, they cornered him in a press conference there. And all the reporters from that country are asking him questions. And I don't want to say they're Norwegian or they're Netherlandish. I believe that's Dutch. They're Netherlandish. Or Netherlies. I like Netherlies. They're from beyond the wall.

But anyway, they're wildings. But anyway, he's asking these questions and so the guy asked a question and said, are you willing to retract the statement that they burned politicians? And he looks and he says,

I already made a statement about that. I'm not answering that question. He said, well, you didn't make a statement about it. You just said you were sorry. You didn't say that

you took it back. Are you willing to take it back? And then he just looks at the guy and he doesn't answer him. And so the next reporter asks the same question and then the next reporter asks the same question finally they get away from him because they they push away from it but there was a bunch of reporters that just what they were like you didn't answer the question ask the answer the fucking question

we need to do more of that shit here you know yeah we need to do more of that shit here they the press is getting pushed out and the i i don't know what the answer is except for to just get together and be like, all right, guys, first question on principle. Yeah, just on principle. First question that does not get answered. We all, now that's our only question. This whole press conference becomes that question. If we get an hour's worth of time, it's an hour of that question because all you want to do is highlight the obfuscation, right? Highlight the lies and the obfuscation and highlight the wiggling and the refusal to answer and the refusal to allow the fourth estate to do its job. Make that the story until we are outraged again that we're getting fucking snowed by the fucking administration.

They're not snowing the press. I think that's really important. They're not snowing the press. I think that's really important. Like, they're not snowing the press. They're not fucking putting up a wall in front of the press. The press is the way we get the information. They're doing it to us. They're saying, fuck you, you.

Yeah, and that's, but they've changed the narrative. And the narrative is, we don't talk to fake news. We don't talk to these, and they're making it seem like those people are the enemy. That's what they're making it seem like those people are the enemy. That's what they're trying to do is make the journalists the enemy instead of saying, we want to lie to you.

You know what I mean? Because that's what they're doing or they're obfuscating or they're just not telling you the things that they want to tell, that people want to know. And so what they'll do is they'll just say, well, it's the news media's fault. They're not saying the right thing. Oh, absolutely. But it's like, it's so funny. It's so blatantly obvious. Well, it's obvious to us, but it's not to the other side. I know. I know. It's like, it's like if you destroy the conduit that information has to use to pass from authority to the people, then the people are always divorced from that authority. And then the authority has no more responsibility to the people.

The authority can say whatever they want. Right. Or say nothing at all, which is even worse and even scarier. Look at those funny little whiskers. That reminds me, it's big gorilla week on Million Dollar Movie. Come on, boy. I know, dad. I should really.

This is amazing. This is amazing because the world has gotten so insane that this is a possibility. He's in Gizmodo. We regret to inform you that Donald Trump's gorilla channel is totally fake. So this is basically like a Twitter prank that kind of took on a life of its own. And the nuts and bolts of the Twitter prank. Actually, do you mind if I read part of it? Go ahead.

Actually read the whole thing. It's hilarious. This is pretty great. So this is the joke. This is purported to show an excerpt from Fire and Fury. This is not real, right? And this was tweeted out. And this was the purported made up excerpt.

On his first night in the White House, President Trump complained that the TV in his bedroom was broken because it didn't have the gorilla channel. Trump seemed to be under the impression that a TV channel existed that screened nothing but gorilla based content 24 hours a day. That was the best. To appease Trump, White House staff compiled a number of gorilla documentaries into a makeshift gorilla channel. That's amazing. It's so awesome. Broadcasted at Trump's bedroom from a hastily constructed transmission tower on the South Lawn. I'm sure that's exactly what happened. However, Trump was unhappy with the channel they had created, moaning that it was

boring because, quote, the gorillas aren't fighting. This is so awesome. What a great prank. Steph edited out all the parts of the documentary where gorillas weren't hitting on each other, hitting on, hitting on each other. Hey, now what's up baby? I got a red ass. My aunt Hill or yours weren't hitting each other. And at last the president was satisfied quote on

some days he'll watch the gorilla channel for 17 hours straight. An insider told me he kneels in front of the TV with his face about four inches from the screen and says encouraging things to the gorillas like boy, you heard that other gorilla was good. I think he thinks the gorillas can hear him. Supposed to be an excerpt from the book, right? And so it goes out

and a bunch of people retweet it and like put stuff up and one person who they said, no, it's a fucking joke who had retweet it? And like, but put stuff up in one person who they said, no, it's a fucking joke who had retweeted. It said people shouldn't tweet out jokes like this because they're too often stripped of context and spread fake news. You read that and thought that was fucking real.

Are you serious? 17 hours. You read that and you thought, yeah, no, that sounds fucking plausible. I love that the part that you seized on as implausible wasn't

that he would watch a gorilla channel, but the length of time he might spend on it. If you get to 17 hours in that, Tom, if you get to 17 hours and you still think it's real, and you still think it's real. You know the part that it's also so obviously

untrue is the transmission tower. You don't know what you get everything from fucking cable. They would just put it on a fucking hard drive. And then just run it from your, yeah, they just play it over and over and over again. I object to the technology.

There's so many things, but if you get to 17 hours and you're like, no, this is still true, you're an idiot. I know. You're a fucking idiot. He doesn't have a fucking gorilla channel.

Now, he's got a poor person snuff channel. Definitely has one of those. But he doesn't have a gorilla channel. Well, what he calls poor people is gorillas. So actually,

maybe this is truer than we think. Can you get a couple of those shithole people to kill each other? Give them all a knife. Put them in an arena. Make them fight. See who comes out.

He doesn't have a gorilla channel, but he has an entire kitchen dedicating to make chocolate cake. Like the entire kitchen. That's all they do is make cake after cake that he can jam into his maw. I get seven pieces. You get nothing. You can watch me eat it. It's a privilege for you to watch me eat. It's amazing that someone can read this.

It's like your friend telling you, I banged this girl. You wouldn't know her. She's not from around here. She's from Canada. I totally put it in her butt. I had an anal threesome with two supermodels from Canada.

It was pretty amazing. We drove her Lamborghini. She had to sell it, so she doesn't actually have it now. Yeah, I took the video, but it didn't come out. Anyway, no big deal. Anyway, don't ask for a lot of details.

I'm the heir to the budding fortune. Who's that guy on the other side Of the glory hole It's Jesus Oh my god That's something isn't it Look at this guy

Wow I've never seen anybody With a head that looks Like a weeble That's amazing That's amazing You know It is

It is astonishing to see somebody born with a congenital defect that they do not evidently have a neck. Their head was just glued onto his shoulder. He looks like someone painted a beard on a thumb. It's amazing. You know what he looks like? A guy who

has child porn. This story is from the Belleville News Democrat. Yep. He does. He does. Mascuta. Mascuta. Mascout. child porn this story's from the belleville news democrat yep he does he does uh mascota mascota mascot how i don't know priest charged with 16 counts of child pornography and possession of meth catholic priest was arrested by belleville police charged with having tons of child porn and looking exactly like a guy who has tons of child porn. I feel like he's the kind of guy who hands you his phone and you do not swipe backwards. Like if he's like,

I want to show you a picture. You look at that picture, that picture only. And then you hand the phone right back. Actually, you tell him, can you lock the screen? Just lock the screen.

He's like, I want to show you a picture. Like I would prefer you didn't. I actually text it to me. So I could text it. It just comes back blocked. God. He got charged with eight counts of dissemination of child pornography.

And I can't help but think he's a Catholic priest. I can't help but think he's just standing there in his frog. He's like, stay, buddy. Want to buy a kid? He's under here right now. Man. Well, you know, the thing is, like, all those priests have, like, that private Facebook

group that they trade all this shit back and forth in, probably. I do think that, like, at some point, like... Face fuck group? What is that? The Catholic priests have such a problem disseminating, you know? They gotta stop all this child disseminating that they're doing. I gotta say, I read through

this, and the guys from Bellwood or something like that they're doing. I gotta say, I read through this and the guys from Bellwood or something like that was Belleville. Yeah. And I totally thought it was fucking Bellflower and my brother lives in Bellflower. And I was like, and Bellflower is the kind of town that you could like flick one of those

those like paper footballs across and it would fucking go way farther than the fucking city limits. But this is a much bigger city. It's a bigger place. I thought though, when I first read it, I was like,

holy shit, is that the guy from where my brothers live? And no, it's not. It's not at all. I've started to think that at some point we need to charge priests

with not having kids porn. I just feel like they get a raise. It would just be easier to find the ones that aren't. The problem is he's getting a raise over the wrong that aren't. I guess the other ones aren't going to get a raise. The problem is he's getting a raise over the wrong things.

I want to read part of this. It says, let me, let me, let me preface this. This guy was on a leave of absence from like 2010. And at one point,

he writes a letter to his parish that says, and he's not been coming in and things like that. And this was a while back. So he was in depression or whatever, supposedly.

He says, the medicines my doctors have me on make me very tired. And some days it is a struggle just to get out of bed. As a consequence, I don't feel that I'm giving you the amount of pastoral care that you deserve. And that's because he had fucking kids stacked like pillow pets on his bed. That's why he didn't want to get out of bed. I'm Raymond Massey, and I have a special message for senior citizens. Today's doctors, drugs, and medical devices truly work medical miracles for young and old alike. But there are some as phony as a $3 bill.

Investigate before you invest in health services or products. Help stamp out quackery. you invest in health services or products. Help stamp out quackery. This story is from Vox. Oprah's long history with junk science. So I know there's like a lot of bibble babble about whether or not Oprah is going to make a run in 2020. Can I just say, can we cut that shit out until she actually announces a run? Yeah, until she actually announces.

And to be perfectly honest, can we fucking cut out the grand experiment of the outsider in fucking Washington? I think we've, I think we've established now, granted he's a fool, but I just don't believe that an outsider has the political know-how to figure this out. No.

So I just want to cut out, like, I don't want fucking Jon Stewart as president next. I don't want Oprah as president. I don't want Stephen Colbert or fucking Jimmy Fallon. No more TV celebrities. Can we stop now? I don't want Oprah as president. I don't want Stephen Colbert or fucking Jimmy Fallon or whoever. No more TV celebrities! Can we stop now? I don't want the fucking situation or whatever. The thing is,

it's not just outsiders. It's specifically like, it's people whose only qualification is that they're entertaining. Their only qualification is that they're used to being in front of a camera and other people have seen them there. I was wondering about this, Cecil. It's like, the majority of the current voting bloc is older than you and I. Right.

So the voting bloc that controls elections is this is a sort of generation past us. Right. And the generation past us fucking eats TV up still. Right. But our generation and younger TV viewership is declined, declined, declined, declined, declined. And I have to wonder if the rise of the television celebrity isn't part of that. That

voting bloc is like, yeah, television celebrity is enough. It's important. So what's next? Yeah, because it was movie personality for Reagan. Movie, TV. Is it YouTube next? Is that what we're going to do? Are we going to decide as a nation that just being popular is literally the only thing to win

this particular popularity contest? I've got two million people on Insta that follow me. Can you imagine an Instagram person or whatever? Oh my God. Snapchat? Literally unqualified for anything useful. Yeah. There's no value whatsoever in these. I mean, look, Oprah's a fucking TV

show host. She's got some magazines and a business that she runs and fucking good for her. I don't want to take that away from her. She's a fucking kurgillionaire. And she's also smart. Right. You know, she clearly runs her own business. That's smart.

Right. But she, like, this article specifically tells me, absolutely, as a skeptic, you should hate this idea. Even if she does decide to run what she hasn't even said yet. All she was making impassioned speech. Real quick, I also want to say, like, there's already, like, fucking people arguing back and forth online about whether or not opposing Oprah

is racist. Like, she's not even running! She's not even running! You're fucking upset about a hypothetical thing, and then the hypothetical response to the hypothetical thing, like, come the fuck on with that shit. Here's the thing. Like as a skeptic, you got to look at the things that are brought up in this article as a way to say, oh shit, she's worse than Jill Stein, man. Let's go through this. Yeah. This shit's crazy. And we should all know this. Yeah. We should all

know this because again, she's trying to sell a TV show. So she, Dr. Oz, Dr. Oz and all of his attendant bullshit. Yeah. That's fucking Oprah. Thanks, Oprah. Really appreciate that shit. Dr. Oz is the kind of guy who has people on that talk. He talks about miracle fat pills. He brings people on that are anti-vaxxers.

At one point during the Ebola outbreak, I want to read. It says at the height of the Ebola panic last year, Oz suggested that the virus could go airborne even though there was universal agreement among virologists. Is that how you say it? Virologists? That the pathogens have never behaved that way. You know, he doesn't even know what he's

talking about. It's like, he read like The Hot Zone by Richard Preston. It was like, that's scary. I bet it happens. Come the fuck on. And then the other person that they're talking about is dr phil he's a a tough love guy on that just yells at people on his show and the one thing that got me on this is it says last december after an investigation uncovered some ethical behind the scenes practices on the show including giving vodka to a guest who is battling alcoholism and

asking other guests with severe drug addictions to buy drugs on the street for the purposes of entertainment. It's like being, okay, we got these fucking, we got a next, we got a sex addict. He's going to jerk off in front of everybody. Well, Dr. Phil's whole shtick seems to be to, like you said, do that tough love thing. He gets them on TV. And then he just yells at him. He kind of feels like the psychologist version of the angry chef who's like, this is a rule you made.

This is garbage. I wouldn't splash this in my fucking soup. It just screams at people. He's kind of the same thing. It's the same fucking thing. He's Judge Judy, the psychologist. Yeah. You know what I mean? I think he's even meaner, though.'s the same fucking thing he's judge judy the psychologist yeah you know what i mean i think he's even meaner though oh yeah i think so too i think so too judy's at least fair yeah well you get a chance to see this stuff and you watch if you watch any

part of the show and then he'll bring out people that the audience wants to hate right so he'll bring out like the little sassy kid you know that everybody wants to yell at and everybody wants to scream at he's basically jerry springer everybody you know what i mean like he's fucking he's like i don't even know like donahue or whatever even worse than that but he hides it under this veneer of like well i'm gonna tell you how it is and give you some down home folksy psychiatry advice he can hand all of this back though to Oprah who made him a figure, same thing with Oz. And then the crazy thing is McCarthy, right? So McCarthy at this, at the end of this is at the end of this article, she came onto her show and this is the, this is the

transcript between them. McCarthy said, the first thing I did when she's talking about her kid and her kid had autism, the first thing I did, Google, I put in autism and I started my research. Then Oprah Winfrey says, thank God for Google. McCarthy says, I'm telling you. Winfrey says, thank God for Google again. And then McCarthy says, the University of Google's where I got my degree from. And I put in autism and something came up that changed my life that led me on this road to recovery, which said that autism, it was in the corner of the screen, is reversible and treatable. And I said, what?

That has to be Hocus Pocus thing because autism is reversible and treatable than it would be on Oprah. Right. Yeah. And it just was. Yeah. It just was. Right. Yeah. And it just was. Yeah. It just was. Yep.

That lie was just there. Yep. And after this, she went on Larry King Live and Good Morning America. After this interview, she got those interviews. Yep. 20 million viewers. She got in front of 20 million viewers. The problem with Oprah is people trust Oprah

like she is not trying to sell them an entertainment program. And one more thing about McCarthy that I just want to throw in. The video for this, the video for McCarthy still exists on Oprah's website with no changes or attributions whatsoever.

That's terrible. Still exists. It's still there and it's featured on her site without any correction, acknowledgement of the problems. That's terrible. Still exists. It's still there and it's featured on our site without any correction, acknowledgement of the problems with McCarthy's claims.

Not a single correction. That's terrible. Not, this lady's a fucking kook. This lady fucking lied. This lady didn't know what the fuck she was talking about because she fucking Googled autism.

Right. Here's the perfect example of why we shouldn't have celebrities. Jenny McCarthy is a perfect example of why celebrities shouldn't be trusted, right? Why we shouldn't be like, oh, they're a celebrity. They should run for office. Jenny McCarthy, when she tried to figure something out, went to her computer and typed something in and fucking got answers that were wrong.

And then used her celebrity power to spread that garbage. Why the fuck should we look to that as something like worthwhile to run government? Because we don't know the difference between being popular and being informed. We're confused about that socially. We're confused about that shit all the time. It's like, well, I heard it from this person who seems like they have my best interest at heart.

You don't know anything about these fucking people. You don't know anything about these people. You don't know whether they're smart or not that smart. You don't know what their research methodologies are don't know whether they're smart or not that smart. You don't know what their research methodologies are. It's just always a bad way to get information. The only thing I will say, the only caveat I would have to that

is if I needed to buy weed, I would get it from Matthew McConaughey. I feel like... I'd get it from Michael Wood Jr. In the name of Jesus, we speak that. Oh, this is from Newsweek. This is fucking amazing. Put down a feeling. I'm high on believing. Oh, this is from Newsweek. This is fucking amazing. Trump impeachment must be prevented through a day of fasting and prayer, Evangelist says.

So this is that fucking Dobson fucking gobbledygook guy. And this is the guy who thinks that not eating lunch will change God's decision. God really, it really does change his mind when you come to him with an empty tummy. So Dobson says here, this is the quote. He says, I'm calling for a nationwide movement to pray for him. I'm calling for a day of fasting and prayer. I hope that Christian people from coast to coast will join in that time. And I love this.

The date is your choosing, but we do need to be praying for our president. I want everyone to join in that time. And I love this. The date is your choosing, but we do need to be praying for our president. I want everyone to join in the time. We're not all going to pick the same time. I don't have any idea. That's okay. Well, it's like you're all trying to fill up a giant tub and all of you all

have to go to the river. You don't all have to do it once. Like Mickey Mouse. You don't have to do it at once. Oh, like Mickey Mouse in the Sorcerer's Apprentice. Yeah, you don't have to do it at once. You could all just sort of work your way up there one at a time or, you know, in a big group. So how many meals

have to be skipped by how many people in like what number of days? Well, God sky writes it every day and it's a decreasing number in the sky. God's got Alexa's like, Alexa, how many days till I give a shit?

Never. What I like about this is that they're basically saying, if you pray for him, you're going to rewind time so that he didn't do it. Or you're going to make us not care that he did. What are the other, right? Or he, you know, because if he didn't do it,

then he won't be impeached. Well, because if he's not guilty of it, nobody's going to, well, he's not going to be impeached anyway, first off, because it's fucking Republicans.

But I'm saying if he didn't do it and it comes out and there's no proof or anything, nobody's going to do anything. There's not going to be a move to do it. If he did it, or at least, you know, they,

they suspect that he did it or strongly suspect that he did it. You just get, you got to go back in time and make him not guilty. Is that how it works? Or the alternative, which I think might be their view is that he's not guilty, but they think the system is flawed and that the system will find a not guilty man,

you know, because we, we guilty man you know because we because you know who can't get a fair shake yeah is billionaire white men who have all of the actual power yeah those guys never get a fair shake tough it's i'll tell you what i'd rather be a poor black man from haiti yeah it says it says, he added later, it seemed evident on election night that the Lord gave us a victory. So Lord, if that's true,

we ask you to protect our president from anything that can hurt him. And I love that that just takes the responsibility for his actions and it throws it right away. It throws it right away, basically saying, look, he's not responsible for what he did. And we're supposed to love him for it.

But this is part of that, like once they become president, like there's a certain group of people that believes, unless they're Democrats, that once somebody becomes president, that we have to support them, right? And we have to just be like,

well, he's your president. He's your president now, right? You've heard that line. Like he's your president now, you got to support him. It's like, well, he is my president, He's your president now, right? You've heard that line. Like, he's your president now. You got to support him. It's like, well, he is my president, but I can disagree with everything he says. And that does not make him less my president.

It doesn't make me less patriotic as if patriotism is some kind of virtue I should aspire to. I don't believe that it is, but it would not make me less patriotic even if patriotism was something I aspire to. None of that matters. That idea that we have to just like, well, once he becomes a president, he's immune to

criticism. Let him do whatever he wants. Sure. And if you don't like him, we'll try to roll it back in four years instead of being like, well, what if... I mean, I'm going to be very vocal about the things I don't like. I'm going to try to influence the politicians that work for me to oppose his policies, oppose his policies, to not push bills because that he that he can sign and get shit in front of him to challenge him on his points. Like there are things it's not a fucking autocracy.

He's not been elected czar. The problem is, is that I feel like I feel like people have fallen away from criticizing their side in a big way. Like, here's the thing. Like, when people do shitty stuff on the Democratic side or on the left, I want to be able to call them out and be like, that's shitty. That's stupid. We did it when Wiener was texting. We've done it.

We did it with the drone strikes and Obama. We did it with Obama. We did it with, you know, not all the time. The thing is, is I thought Obama was doing some pretty good stuff. But when you see what this guy is doing and you see all the things that he that he that he's trying and failing or he's just being a buffoon or he's like the other day when he was having a conversation about immigration and they recorded it, he didn't know what he was talking about. Oh, I know. He interrupts himself and he just, he's a terrible leader. He's really bad at all this.

I don't know how you went into this, voted for that guy and are still like, yeah. But you know, it's so funny because a guy at my work came in and was like, oh, he just did this great. And you, because he's a Republican and we've had these conversations. He's like, the press was blown away. He kept the press in the meeting. And like, it was just really like, like Trump really just kind of set it as it was and like all this sort of stuff. He's like, it was a watershed moment. And I went and watched it and I was like, man, he just spouted a bunch of blowhard generalities. He didn't have a plan for what to do or how to fix. He basically just

said, we should do something to fix these things. We should do something to fix these things. If nobody wants to do something, I'll do something. I'll take the heat. We should do something to fix these things. We should do something to fix these things. If nobody wants to do something, I'll do something. I'll take the heat. We should do something. We're very close to doing something. That kind of is all that happened there. There was no substance. There was no detail. There was no plan. That's everything. It was just a bunch of bullshit generalities.

Of course. But there are people that are fucking snowed by that shit. They love it. And they're afraid to say anything about their own side. They don't do it. They never do it. You know, it's interesting that Ann Coulter came out against him, against what he was talking about, because she doesn't, you know, she wants strong regulation. Oh, yeah. She was just, she was pissed off. A lot of Republicans are pissed off. That he did that. So it's interesting to see some of these people that, you know, are sort of, you know, at least influential Republicans that are pulling back

but the tax cuts, when they're talking about the tax cuts. Everybody was saying like, oh, it's going to trickle down. It's going to come back from the people. And so there was one company that decided to give a couple thousand dollars to all their employees because they're going to get a big tax break. And you're like, okay, show me that with all the companies.

Show me every company doing that. It's not every company. It's one company. Yep. All company did it. Okay, cool story. Yeah, I know. Does that affect everybody? Yeah.

370 million people or 320, however many, I get it wrong all the time. 300 plus million people. Most of us aren't ever going to be affected by that. I was reading on Twitter. I think it was Secular Bloke is a popular Twitter guy and he was posting something. I think it was him. And he said something about posting something like, I'm in meetings all the time.

I work with the United States company. I'm in high-level business meetings all the time. We never, ever, ever, ever talk about the tax cut as an incentive to do anything. Right. Never comes up.

It's not an incentive for anything. Period. Yeah. It's just not. It's just, if anything happens, it's more money to the corporate bottom line. Okay, great. Yeah. But it doesn't mean you're going to hire somebody.

Nope. Because if I can get away with not hiring somebody, then that's more money too. It's more money to me. To the bottom line. Yep. It is altogether right to discriminate against homosexual behavior. Oh, this is crazy. This is Linda Harvey.

Linda Harvey, we must re-horrify people about the sin of homosexuality. I'm horrified enough about the idea of Linda Harvey and the word sex or sexuality. I don't need to be re-horrified. So here we go. I'm going to play this. And so many of these groups are predators. I believe that the homosexual clubs in schools are just red flags for predators. I mean, what?

Wait a minute. When you come in, you just hear. There's like three dicks line up on your chest. You're super Republican. It's illegal aliens versus predator. You're like, I don't know who to root for. I don't. It's very confusing.

Jose has a long tail. Did you meet a Mexican? Your breath is like acid. He's got two mouths. One shoots out of the other mouth. Homosexual club. Oh, join our homosexual club. Like some, some like straight dude's going to be like, oh, I don't know. I'd have sex. I'm in high school. He's join our homosexual club. Some straight dude's going to be like,

I don't know. I'd have sex. I'm in high school. I was going to go join volleyball, but I guess I'll join the gay club. You just walk in. You're like, okay, do we take our dicks out now? How does this work? I don't know when we

take our dicks out. Oh, no. That's not how school works. That's not how school works. So weird. I mean, I think that they exist there as an audience to continue to fast-track kids into this lifestyle. You wouldn't want to wait. It's like a TSA pre-check for pin game. I'll fuck you, but you can keep your shoes on and put the laptop over in that bag.

But you had to take off your belt, sweetheart. The belt's got to come off. No lube greater than three ounces is allowed. Nobody gets to go through the thing where you hold up. Everybody's got to get felt up. Everybody gets felt up, no matter what. Right. Yeah.

And they're okay with certain gels and liquids. They're good with that. Network with adults. I mean, they're in who knows what goes on there. So, um. Well, why don't you just fucking imagine it? Yeah. Why don't you just.

I don't really know what goes on there, but they're probably fucking. It's like, what if, even if they were, even if they were. But they're not. They're just adults that were fucking. But who would give a shit? Well, I thought she was still talking about the gay clubs. I don't. Oh, I don't even know what she's talking about anymore.

I literally, because her train of thought is so convolutedly bizarre. I can't, I thought she was still talking about the gay clubs. Oh, I don't even know what she's talking about anymore. Because her train of thought is so convolutedly bizarre, I can't follow it. You know, I think that one of the things I wanted to talk to you about was, you know, how do we re-horrify people about the sin of homosexuality? Make gay people fuck each other with knife

penises. I think that's how you do it. Like saw? Like a saw? Make them sword fight. Are you not entertained? I'm a guard. It's just like, you just see this sign and you're like,

I don't know that I want to go to the pork sword fights. I don't know. I don't think I'm going to do that. I don't think I'm going to skip that. I think this is a really good way to re-horrify people about the dangers of homosexuality.

We would need more homosexual parents to just walk in on them. Anytime you walk in, you're like, and then you're traumatized no matter what. I don't want to see any of it. Maybe they should just distribute pictures of Matthew Shepard. That'll horrify people for...

Unfortunately, it fucking wouldn't. It wouldn't for these people. There are no horrors. And there's no reason to be horrified about people's sexuality. There is a reason to not be involved in other people's fucking sexual personal business. And it's every possible reason to not be involved. It's like, well, we need people to really imagine it and get totally grossed out. That's what she's saying.

That's what she's saying. That is what she's saying. She's saying, back in my day, people used to think about other people in sexual positions and it made them sick to their stomach. What the fuck is wrong with you kids these days? Don't you know that sometimes it goes in their butts? Their butts, people. People are becoming so comfortable with this. I mean, even people on our side.

We need to re-horrify them. You can be comfortable if you use enough lube and prep work. And if you want to use more lube, you can go to adamandeve.com. Type in Gloria at checkout, get 50% off almost any item, a free sex swing and free shipping.

I think it's very complicated. I think it comes back to gaining a moral understanding that is found in the word of God. You know, we have to respect God and God... We got to read an old book to get fucking all worked up

about shit that the rest of us have figured out doesn't matter. Yeah. Exactly. Rather than deciding that we know better than God. And that means, you know, it's become a very trendy sin.

You can get gay at Hop Topic now. Does this semen look good with this outfit? It's a blue dress. It actually works just fine. Here's the thing. It goes with every outfit. It is the accessory that keeps on giving. A pearl necklace is always in fashion.

It always is. No matter what. That's the way it is. You see it everywhere. And unless we get back to respecting God and God's authority in our life, I don't think we're going to recover that sense of the awfulness of all sin. Not just homosexuality. Right.

But lying, for example, about this sin, not just homosexuality. Right. But lying, for example, about this issue, what you're doing. Yeah. I love it. They're not like, they're not hung up on the other sins.

They're not, they're not like, where's their crusade against divorce or, or lying or murder or adultery or graven images or like, you know, honoring their father and mother. Like where's their fucking giant fucking crusade around all the rest of that made-up bullshit oh because nobody cares about that stuff

except for the murder i guess people care about that but nobody cares about the rest of that shit yeah there's not like a fucking commission like the american family institute doesn't have a fucking whole pdf on idols right you know what i mean exactly you know yeah they're not you know the thing is like their crazy fucking moon religion is fine with all this shit because I think the rest of these things, they can go through their do it and forgive it model, right?

Yeah. It's all periodic rather than definitional. Even murder, right? You murder a dude and it's like, oh, I fucking killed that guy, but I found Jesus in prison.

It's, oh, that's so great. And then, you know, you're forgiven and stuff. You know, I think that one of the issues that maybe that they have with homosexuality is it's like, it's definitional rather than sort of transactional in nature. If I lie to you, it's like this transaction, right? Sure.

Like I said a thing that wasn't true and then, you know, like I said, and then you're aggrieved and I sinned, but I can be forgiven for it. But if I'm just gay, that's just who I am. And I think they can't figure that out. Well, I think I could get a couple of drinks out of a gay guy. That's transactional, right?

Isn't it? With that beard, I think you could get more than a couple of drinks, buddy. Pearl necklace never goes out of fashion. This town needs an enema. Oh, I love this. This is from Boing Boing. This is amazing. Gwyneth Paltrow.

I would love to meet Gwyneth Paltrow. She just seems crazy as a shit house rat. The shit she's selling at this point. At some point, I just want to be like, bravo. Yeah. Did we look at the fucking vibrator necklace that she sells on her site? I don't think so. Oh my God.

It's a vibrator necklace. It's the best thing you've ever seen. Can you go to her goop site? She sells a necklace and she's like, yeah, you know, it's like, holy shit.

Is there a fucking $7,000 or $6,000 necklace? Oh, her shit's super talisman coin necklace. Yeah. That one's 12,000. Jesus fucking Christ. Are you kidding me? Oh, her shit's super. A talisman coin necklace. Yeah, that one's $12,000. Jesus fucking Christ. Are you kidding me? Yeah, this shit's ugly too.

It's so fucking ugly. I wouldn't throw this shit away. Oh, they're astrology signs? Oh, God. Are you kidding me? So she sells for like, how much is that fucking thing? $150. She sells a, it says it's a Vesper vibrator necklace.

And it looks like a fucking vibrator hanging from a fucking gold chain. And at first I was like, oh, I guess it says it's discreet, highly polished, 24-karat gold vibrator hanging from a chain. Fucking,

I know what this is. This is a goldfinger. I know what this is. This is a goldfinger. Scroll down because there's a picture. I was like, okay, I guess maybe it was really small. Look how fucking huge that thing is. Jesus Christ.

The thing's like, this is not a subtle item. I like that it's USB rechargeable. I love it. It's like, for all those times you got to fucking diddle yourself on the go, but you don't want to stuff a mini vibrator in your purse. You want to wear it around your neck. So everyone knows that you're fucking diddling yourself in the car or whatever. It's such a weird thing to sell.

That is pretty weird. It's like, it's like wearing a, like a giant unicorn dildo. I know, right? We were just like, yeah, just set the hat down, jump up and down a few times it's like a fucking i don't even know like it's

like a fucking it's like instead of having a starbucks book in the morning you just got a fleshlight hand was like well let me pay for it it's my fleshlight wallet pull out a flesh that you're drinking coffee hold on a minute you have to scope it up, like squeeze it a little bit to like open it up. It's like you're using it as a coin purse. You like reach in there, pull out a pencil. Hang on, let me leave the tip.

I just, it makes that sound. Don't worry. It's just, somebody puts a symbiont on their scooter and there's a scooter. The scooter kind of is a symbiont. I guess it is.

It just needs wheels. All it needs is wheels, man. You're on the go. It's more like when you were a kid and they had that inchworm thing. It's more like... It's more like when you were a kid and they had that inchworm thing. Bounce around on your genitals.

Oh, geez. I want to rub this hard plastic mound against your genitals. I want to talk about what this is. So she sells a fucking bottle with a look. One of those things that you take, it has the squeezer things that they pump your blood pressure when they take your blood pressure, one of those squeezer things on it, a squirple.

And then it has a long, a long tube that comes out and you're supposed to use it to shoot coffee in your anus for some reason. And I want to read. So here's what Wikipedia says about coffee enemas. It says, coffee enemas cause numerous side effects, including infections, sepsis, severe electrolyte imbalance,

colitis, procolitis, proctocolitis. That's bad. Salmonella, brain abscess. Oh my God. And heart failure. If the coffee is inserted too quickly or is too hot, it could cause

internal burning or rectal perforation.org That sounds like it sucks. Oh my god. It's too hot. It's so funny. They just like fucking percolate that shit and pour it right up there. Fresh from Starbucks is like

a thousand degree lava coffee. And you're like, what? Stop it up my ass! Stop it up my ass! That's hot. Do you put creamer in it before you put it up?

I don't want the extra calories. Oh, God. There's a part of this article that says if you don't want to fill your rectum with coffee, Gwyneth also recommends detoxing by drinking out of a $350 rose gold crazy straw, applying $85 wellness oil,

drinking from $84 bottle with a positive energy crystal jutting out proudly from its base or carrying an $85 shaman bag of mystically charged stones. Are you fucking kidding? Like, you know, when you read that off, you think you just opened someone's inventory on Skyrim. Are you fucking serious? Like, we live in a time where you could, we have fucking rovers on Mars. We fly places all over the world we fucking have electronic banking and we're still buying crystals in a bag

we're still buying wish stones man i know i know it's this is really expensive ones i love part of me doesn't part of you like admire gweneth Paltrow though because she's just like bet these fucking dumb asses will buy a rock stick in a bag tell them it's got magic healing powers to detoxify if that doesn't work pep them up a little coffee up the ass shaman bag don't squeeze the shaman whatever you do it's like it's always been the little women that caught the vision of giving beginning with jesus himself out of their private means some of you little precious ones have that little grocery money some of that little money set aside assure tonight the blessings of god on your family by giving it to god and speaking that say it god this is for blessings on my family this story is also from newsweek donald trump's

spiritual advisor paula white suggests people send her their january salary or face consequences from God. That's pretty much exactly what it sounds like. She says, January is the beginning of a new year for us in the Western world. Let us give to God what belongs to him. The first hours of our day, the first month of the year, the first of our increase, the first in every area of our life. It is devoted. The principle of first fruits is that when you give God the first, he governs the rest and redeems in. When you honor this principle,

it provides the foundation and structure for God's blessings and promises in your life. It unlocks deep dimensions of spiritual truths that literally transform your life. When you apply this, everything comes in divine alignment for his plan and promises for you. When you don't honor it, whether through ignorance

or direct disobedience, there are consequences. Her voice changed into Alex Jones. It got a little weird there at the end. She's a lizard. It was a whole thing. She wants you to give fucking all the January money. In her latest video, she says, each January, I put God first and

honor him with the first of our substance by sowing a first fruits offering of one month's pay. That's a big sacrifice, but I'm a rich cunt and I can afford it. I may have editorialized. She said, but it is a seed for the harvest. I am believing in for the believing for the coming year. And God always provides. You spend three months salary.

God lets you put it in his butt. Harvesting the seeds. Harvesting the seeds a little messy though. Harvesting the seeds a little messy though, admittedly. I've seen that video. That video had a lot of enemas ahead of time. I'm just saying. I don't know if they were coughing.

A lot of baby wipes. Here's what I don't get. Just giving her one month's salary is a pay cut. Because they normally tithe 10%. Well, no, I don't think this is instead of. This is in addition to. My guess is you give the first month and then you give 10% subsequently. 10% of the rest, yeah.

Yeah, that's... It would have to be because if not, it's a pay cut. It's 112. It's a pay cut. Yeah, instead of 110. Exactly have to be because if not, it's a pay cut. It's 112. It's a pay cut. Yeah, instead of 110. Exactly. She's not getting a pay cut. It's 8% instead of 10%.

Yeah, she's not getting a pay cut. But also there's the, you know, money in the hand. Money in the hand. Money up front. Right. Yeah, the money today is worth more than money tomorrow.

Sure. You know, it's just worth more. Yeah. But also like, there are people out there who are just going to give her this money. And it's like, even if I believed

in her crazy fucking theory of this prosperity gospel shit, the prosperity gospel is always prosperity for the guy preaching the gospel. It's never for the person who's going to get it because it's all garbage. It's not prosperity for the people who listen to the gospel. It's never prosperity there. But even if I believe in this shit, if I could give the money to actual God, then maybe I'd have something here. Right.

If there was a way to fucking mail that letter to Santa Claus and it actually went to the fucking North Pole, then maybe I'd be fucking more excited about get my red rider BB gun. But that shit is not going to fucking happen. You're not. You're giving it to fucking mom. Right. Yeah. And that's what's happening. And you're giving your fucking month's salary to this fucking woman who also, if she's giving

her, who's she giving her month's salary to? She's giving away her January money to who? Yeah. That's the thing. She wants you to give it to her. Give it to her. Where's the, there's, this is not a multi-level marketing scheme. Right.

This is a one level marketing scheme. And the level is give it to me. Right. That's the level. Right. Give me your money. You know, when I do it, I give my money to me. Yeah.

It's true in some cases, but they aren't all valedictorians. They weren't all brought in by their parents. For everyone who's a valedictorian, there's another hundred out there that they weigh 130 pounds and they've got calves the size of cantaloupes because they're all in 75 pounds of marijuana across the desert. This story is from Right Wing Watch. Ken Blackwell says dissolved voter fraud commission will maintain White House access.

I do want to talk about this, this fucking dissolved voter commission. Dissolved? Yeah. I wonder why it was dissolved. Wait, what did it find, Cecil? What did the voter commission find? I think it found that every single illegal immigrant that voted was Kaiser Sosa.

Right? He's gone. Oh, my gosh. I love that this thing is dissolved and nobody's talking about the fact that it found nothing, right? That it was dissolved and that that was all fucking bullshit. Sure. And it always was bullshit. And they said they had proof.

They're like, we got proofs man we got proof and you're just like where's your proof at why isn't anybody dragging that motherfucker i remember that motherfucker yeah who was like on tv yeah i got where's that motherfucker i got proof where's your proof right where's your proof that he was like i'm gonna i'm gonna bring it out i just gotta double triple check the numbers i gotta i'll make sure to have it i gotta have fucking rain man double check it made his rounds and he probably sold some book or something and he's like, thank you for the fucking book. I'm out. Yeah.

But we should be holding that fucking guy's feet to the fire. Yeah. We should be calling him out. No, you should be holding the president's feet to the fire because he's the one who came out and said, three million people, three million plus illegal immigrants, show me the numbers. You said it's true. Show me the numbers. But that guy keeps saying

shit. We keep saying like it's not true. And then we'll point out that it's not true. And then he says it's totes true. And I'll give you the evidence. He never gives you the evidence. He reverses his stance on everything all the time. And like there's still people are like, oh, but you know, the stock market's up. I mean, I fucking saw

this shit today. It's like all this crazy shit. And people are like, well, there's more jobs and stock market's up. I mean, I fucking saw this shit today. It's like, it's like all this crazy shit and people are like, well, there's more jobs and stock market's up. It's like, none of his policies have anything to do with that.

Yeah. None of it. Like trace, traces, trace jobs back to one policy. Which policy, which thing

did he enact that made that happen? You're not going to find shit. I think they'll say he came in and took away a bunch of Obama, Obama's regulations.

And deregulating things increases the chance that business is going to... Again, you've got to prove that. You've got to prove it. I'll say that. I know. Shit makes me crazy, though. Yeah. Let's play a few minutes, like a minute of this.

This is long. I don't want to play it all. As I've told you and Tony on a number of occasions, you know, when we first got involved in this election business, we were primarily concerned about access to the ballot. And it is. No, no, no, no. Nobody said access to the ballot. All people said was there was way more people that voted that shouldn't have voted. That side of the aisle is trying to prevent access to the ballot. Every chance that they get, every chance they get these voter ID laws,

they're constantly trying to disenfranchise certain groups from the ballot. Yeah. There's, I mean, there are, there are stated strategies that are not, like, this is not conspiracy shit. There are stated strategies, you know, to try to prevent likely Republicans from being able to get to the ballots. Yeah. Likely Democrats.

Likely Democrats. Forgive me. Reasonably easy. It's for folks to register and go to the polls. There's just some fucking guy in bum fucksville, Arkansas. This is the fifth Kaiser Soze today. That's weird. bumfucks Bill Arkansas.

This is the fifth Kaiser Soze today. That's weird. Last 10, 12 years, we've balanced our concern about access

to the ballot with protecting the integrity of the vote. Because for every fraudulent vote you have, you negate

a legitimate vote. And so... So you've negated like four. Yeah. But it's a bad legitimate vote. And so... So you've negated like four. Yeah. But it's a bad legitimate vote. It's okay. Basic safeguards like voter ID.

Voter ID is a poll tax. Voter ID is a fucking poll tax. The reason why voter ID is garbage is because all those places that they require voter ID, most of those places require a state ID, which costs money to get. If you have to pay money to get it, then it's useless for somebody who's super poor, especially if they don't need it. If they take the bus every day, what the fuck do I need an ID? What the fuck do I need a state's ID for? If I have my Social Security card and I have other forms of identification, I don't need that piece of identification.

So they won't go buy it. The other thing too is people don't understand, and this is one thing that makes me crazy, is when people say, you know, well, how hard is it just to go get a license? If you are a person who's very, very destitute, getting a license... Big dollars. It's a lot

because $10 for you and I isn't a lot. But it's a day off of work. But it's a day off of work. It's time off of work. Right. Here's how I will allow a voter ID law. Here's how I'll allow it. Same thing I'm going to say. You get a day off of work automatically paid for 100% by your employer.

That is a one full day off of work. It's absolutely free. And you get a travel voucher to and from the place. I will allow it if those three things happen. I'll allow it under those three things happen. I'll allow it under a different set of circumstances. I would say a voter ID law would make sense if there was a free federally issued and federally recognized ID. So instead of a state ID that varied location by location, if there was just a national

ID that we all have and it's just part of being a citizen of this country and you get it and it's free and that's that then fine but you gotta get it though right so so if that existed then okay that's that's just well I'm just no but I'm saying like like in order to get it take that I'm saying you still have to take the day you still have to have that so I'm what I'm willing to say is like make sure that those people yeah didn sure that those people don't have any burden. If there's no burden, I'm okay with it. But the moment there's a burden on somebody to try to get that thing, that's why we don't have it. We don't have it because we want to make sure we don't disenfranchise voters because of their poverty.

Also, we've shown study after study after study after study after study after study shows there's no need for it. It accomplishes nothing. Yeah, it doesn't do anything. It does not prevent, there is no such thing as like these massive voter frauds. These things don't happen. They are not happening. They don't happen in states that don't

have voter ID laws. They don't happen in states that do have, they don't happen. Period. It is a reaction. It is a reaction designed to disenfranchise minorities from the polls. Absolutely. That's exactly what it's for. It's got nothing to do with the integrity of the vote. Nothing whatsoever. You want answers? I think I'm entitled. You want answers. I want the truth. You can't handle the truth. So the story is from Right Wing Watch. This is Dave, coach. Not coach. Not a coach.

Daubenmeier. Oprah for President Talk is preparing America for white genocide. Huh. So here we go. That sounds crazy. He's got his face. His face is off. The face in his photo.

Absolutely perfect. Oh, my God. All right. Look at that. So here we go. Here's Dave Daubenmeier. Lord, where do you so here we go here's dave daubenmeyer lord where do you where do you want me to go here i want you to get really racist he's got two and a half minutes can you can you put the white hood on is he the is he the grand

poobah already is that what's happening is he gonna be the water buffalo he's gonna pull his dragon wizard it's gonna be great okay i'll go there. Yeah, you will. Yeah, you will. God, what do I say to sound as racist as possible against some of the races you created? I've said this before

on the show. And I'm going to dive right back into it. We better wake up and understand that the attack in America is on the white Anglo-Taxan male. Life has never been harder.

Tell you what, it's so tough. They can't even get elected president. I will say too, I was talking to that guy at work he's and he's like don't you think there's a war against white men are you serious yeah i did i we didn't get to finish the conversation i said tell me one concrete way your life has gotten harder yeah tell me one way you and he's like well it's not about that i'm like well then it didn't happen you know do you hear what i just said yeah i heard you said you said you're racist i heard it

we all heard it come on you're not allowed said you said you're a racist. I heard it. We all heard it. Come on. You're not allowed to say that. You're not allowed to say it. I don't know. You say literally anything. Yeah, you just said it. Yeah, nobody stops.

You can say literally anything. That little kid didn't make your mouth go away from the Twilight Zone. And nobody took him off fucking YouTube and nobody arrested him and nothing happened. Nothing happened. You can say whatever you want. You just say abjectly not true. The fucking Alex Jones thinks there's lizards, man. You can say whatever you want. You can just say abject and not true. The fucking, Alex Jones thinks there's lizards, man. He could say

that. You can say this dumb shit too. How many of you watched the Golden Globs or whatever they call those things the other night? Globes, you stupid shithead! Golden Globes! It was the most absolute, unbelievable frontal assault on white Christian maleness that I've ever seen. Now they

couched it behind sexual abuse. I've ever seen. Now, they couched it behind sexual abuse. I love that he's like, how dismissive he is. He's air-quoting sexual abuse. Sexual abuse. As if sexual abuse doesn't exist. Oh, my God.

Because that's when you use air quotes. I know. As if it's like, oh, we're going to get upset about sexual abuse. Yeah. We are, man, because it's terrible. Turns out it's real bad.

Shouldn't be happening. The world's richest woman stood up there and cried how she was discriminated against. Oprah, I don't know. I didn't see the speech. I didn't either. But Oprah, if she cried that she was discriminated against, chances are she probably was discriminated against. Yeah, I'm going to guess in many areas in her life, at different points in her life, as a black woman, that is almost certainly to have happened. Yeah.

Okay. Yeah. The fact that she's rich and successful now doesn't mean that the entirety of her life, she wasn't born rich and successful. She may be discriminated against today. The money insulates you from that sort of thing. But not completely. Right. And she wasn't always rich. Right. She wasn't born

like she's not the queen of America. The world's richest woman. And all the women dressing black. And then you had these sissy men that came up and did self-flagellation afterwards of, oh yeah, we're just all for it. Oh, the way we've treated women.

Whack, whack, whack, whack. Is he quacking? I think he's... Is he quacking? Quacking or whack? He's either whacking himself or quacking himself. I love that he's like all these sissified men that are like, oh, I don't like the way we treat... Like, I can't decide if he's more racist or more misogynist.

But right now, he's more misogynist. I think he's kind of even. He's going after Oprah. And then, you tell me this is not orchestrated. Oprah gets up there and gives that talk. And then now they want Oprah to be president of the United States. Some people do. Sure.

Yeah. Fine. So what? Yeah. People have talked about Oprah for president every time there's been an election. People talk about Howard Stern for president. I know. For crying out loud.

Who cares? They're both equally qualified. She has not announced anything anyway. Yeah. Yeah. Oprah Winfrey. Oprah. Right now, you have a foul mouth, shitty, fucking

hair plug douche bag who screams, you're fired. That was his fucking qualifications. And you're going to look in the camera and be like, Oprah Winfrey. They're equally qualified. Yeah, I was going to say, like, so you just yelled, like, it's America's richest woman, right? Or the world? I don't

know. Richest woman. So, clearly, very successful business person. And that's his only, it was even there, and whether he was even a successful businessman is open for some debate, right? But it was like, it was the thing that they said they liked about him, right? And it's like, well, this other person has the same thing.

Well, I know, but she's got a black vagina. She's got a black. She's got the worst kind of vagina, people. It's a black vagina. Oprah Winfrey. Now, remember, Hollywood wants to give her a skirt, right? That's his dog. That had to be his dog.

I hope it's Shemp off screen Just Give us her He's looking at his dog Is his dog like chewing on a microphone I want to rewind this It's amazing Motherfucker This guy's like I'm going to kill this dog He is looking at the dog like that's my wife's dog It's amazing. That's her. Mother of God.

What is happening? This guy's like, I'm going to kill this dog. He is looking at the dog like, that's my wife's dog. I fucking hate my wife. I hate my wife so much. I hate everything she likes. I wish my wife was a black woman so bad. The God haters want to give us her.

Okay? They say she's the most popular, the most popular, whatever they say. Okay. Listen, listen closely. Go ahead, Jared. Watch her eyes. Bread and marinated in it, in that prejudice and racism, and they just have to die. Hang on a minute. Hey, Oprah, how? How are they going to die? You're just going to let them die of old age, Oprah, if you get to be president of the United States, you related in any way? You got any spirit in any way similar to Adolf Hitler

and what he did over there? Is she just saying, we just need to wait for the racist people to die? Yeah, I think I, suggesting that people who hold a hate-filled ideology will eventually die off and that the world will be better for their passing is in no way related to Adolf Hitler saying, hey, let's kill all the Jews. Any way to speed this process up?

Look, I like your idea. You're a good idea, man. I just need it to go a little faster. Is there any way you could maybe like, I don't know, shove a couple in ovens? Is there any way we could get big ovens? We're working on a different timeline here. Let's get big ovens. I want big ovens. I want to jam them in the ovens. Can we do this? Let's make this happen.

Goibles, do it. Jesus Christ. It's the same thing. It's the same thing. Absolutely identical. Is this just kind of reverse Nazism, Oprah? Isn't reverse Nazism, Oprah? Isn't reverse Nazism being nice?

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Thanks so much for your generous donations. We really do appreciate it. We want to let everybody know about some patron content that we let out, but we did not make it patron only. Right. So we're going to put on this week's show notes a link to a bit of tape that Tom and I recorded a week ago that we released to patrons

that is sort of a test to sort of talk about some serious things and not try to make a bunch of jokes. Like Tom and I, when we get together, we always try to make each other laugh. That's kind of our shtick. That's what we do. But once in a while,

if we have very serious conversation, we're not trying to interrupt the other person for jokes. And this is what it was. So we talked about two specific articles that we were both really interested in and we wanted to have a conversation about. And we wanted to have a very serious conversation. So we talked about two specific articles that we were both really interested in and we wanted to have a conversation about. We wanted to have a very serious conversation. So we posted that to Patreon. We're

asking people, if you're interested in that, go listen to it. If you like it, hit the heart on Patreon so that we can gauge how many people liked it and enjoyed it. And if it's something that we want to continue. We don't know that we're going to add it to the show per se, but we might add it as extra content. Right. Or maybe like Thursday content or something. We're't know that we're going to add it to the show per se, but we might add it as extra content or maybe like Thursday content or something. We're

not sure what we're going to do with it yet, but we had a good time having that conversation and we'd like to see if people enjoyed listening to it. So please go check it out. This week's show notes, this is $3.96. It'll be a link to Patreon. You do not have to join to listen you can just listen you do not have to be a person who is a patron to hear it but we just don't want to put it on a regular feed that we normally go out and it's playable right from the website from your phone

a bunch of people sent us this image a ton of people sent it to us actually Horatio is the first one though so we're going to post this image on this week's show notes it's a Beavis and Butthead image. It is, and it's great. And it looks good. It's really funny, so check it out. This week's show notes, $3.96.

Oh, my God. This is a crazy video, Tom. So weird, man. Alex Jones just talks about dicks a lot, and somebody super cut a bunch of him talking about hard-ons and dicks. And it goes on and on. Yeah. It's not just one episode, either. There's like 50 episodes where he's like... He's raging about

raging. Cock and balls, cock and balls, cock and balls, cock and balls. It's crazy. So we'll put the link on this. We showed it to a YouTube video. Thanks, Luke, for sending it in. Tom, we got a message from Derek. This is so funny. Derek says, I manage teams in India. They end all their emails with, please do the needful. Please do the needful.

They do for us too. It's so funny. So one time I thought I was funny and I responded back with, the needful has been completed. And they sent me an email back thanking me. You need to do that from now on. Oh, so we got a message from Kristen and Kristen wanted to correct us. The reason why you want to have gluten-free beauty products is I guess if people with celiac or intense celiac will get rashes and hives.

I didn't know that. That's crazy. If they don't use gluten-free stuff, that's crazy to me too. Also, it's kind of crazy to me that like gluten would be in it anyway, but you know. Okay. Tom, we got a message from Mike,

and he wants us to know it's tough being a flat earther. Hey, he says, I can't order a drink on a plane because we're going hundreds of miles an hour, and I don't want the liquid to splash out of my ass. I don't know how you round earthers can't see it. I want to get a shirt that says round earther. We need to make a contest round earther shirt. Oh, I love it.

I love it. We're going to make one round-earther shirt. Secular thinky guy. Secular thinky person. Yes. It's not guy. That's sexist, you fucker. God damn it.

Jesus. We got a bunch of messages about why people take trains and why you should take trains. And, you know, it actually was really great to get all these messages. Because, like, you know, you and I have had experiences where we've great to get all these messages because like like you know you and i have had experiences where we've tried to get tickets and they've been expensive and so we've just been like why would you do this but people said that the the tickets by and large are much cheaper uh less than half sometimes a third of what you would pay for a flight there's no tsa that you normally have to fucking drag yourself through, which can be a fucking hassle.

Yeah, it can. And it restricts like what you can bring places. Absolutely. And a lot of times you can sleep because it's a much bigger seat. Like you can actually go to sleep in it instead of the fucking, the cattle car feel that every economy class person that has flown knows what that feels like. There's less of a weight limit. So you don't have a ton of weight limits that you have to pay attention to. They say it's greener, which is interesting.

You move a lot more of everything for a lot less fuel. That's very interesting. This one here is from BizQuick. But Elvis also sent one in and said, they actually pull up in a lot of really nice major metropolitan areas. So when you pull up, you're just like, oh, cool. I'm in this area and I could just get off. And then he also said that, you know, taking the train is kind of cool.

Like, it's like, you know, it's an experience in itself, which, you know, something that you or I might not, you know, appreciate, but other people may, you know, so I thought it was a, we got a lot of really great people that, yeah, a lot of really great emails about this. It really made me think about, you know, train. I probably won't do it, but it made me think about it.

I feel like those are all compelling points, but I don't have the time for, you know, the travel travel for me is, has to be over quickly too. I have to be in and out. Yeah. Right.

It's like sex. It's just gotta be fast and in and out. I don't have a choice. Yeah. Got a message from Mike. And Mike says, Cecil, you were, where did you see Dead Milkman? He says he thinks he's from, I'm from upstate New York. We're from Chicago.

I grew up here. And I saw them at the Chicago Metro. And it was, gosh, it had to be 20 years ago I saw them. It was, the Metro is a small venue here in Chicago. And it's a pretty popular venue and they have a balcony section but all the rest of it's general admission. It's all for the stage. It's all Big Crush. He said

that he saw, they were opening the opening act was Possum Dixon. You remember that? I do. I did not until he wrote it down though. I know. And he said it was easily the most insane pit I had ever been in or seen. He said, maybe we ran into each other.

He said, also at Nine Inch Nails and Marilyn Manson. I saw Nine Inch Nails tour with Marilyn Manson when Nine Inch Nails did the Downward Spiral tour. They toured with Marilyn Manson and Hole. That was a pretty good, I mean, that's- Did you see that? I saw Marilyn Manson.

I saw it at UIC. So at the UIC Pavilion. Okay, I didn't see it then. And I remember- That'd be a great show. The one thing I remember, there's two parts of the show that, actually three parts of the show I remember

really, really well. Yeah. There's a lot of that show I remember. But one of the three parts that I want to mention, the first one is when Hole was on stage, Courtney Love was playing and a bunch of shit broke. So shit just didn't malfunction. So they had to get the

roadies out to fix it. And while they're fixing it, everybody's screaming and booing and she pulls her top down. She goes, amuse yourselves. And then she put it back up and I was like, I just saw Courtney loves titties. Then the very next act is Marilyn Manson. And Marilyn Manson

comes out on stage and nobody I didn't even know who he was back then he's brand new you know sort of on the scene at least to me I'm sure there's other people who knew he was but I didn't know who he was and so Marilyn Manson's out there playing and at one point he takes his pants off and he's got this giant rubber prosthetic cock that is on his vinyl pants that just comes out from his pants and he spits in his hand and he proceeds to jerk that that prosthetic cock that robert dick off on stage and i'm looking and be like am i watching a dude jerk off right now and then my favorite part of the the the nine inch nails concert i know this i know what's gonna happen do you know i feel like i know what's gonna

happen do you want me to guess? Go ahead and guess. Did all of his shit, did he like smash all his shit in the music? No, this is different. Hey, that happens at every time. Yeah, some guy kicks over his piano and it's still playing. No, it's not that. That's obvious. My favorite part was they were showing a movie.

They were showing a movie and it's movies like it's like the ring or whatever. it's like all this crazy it's like maggots are eating a bird or whatever it's like a bunch of birds and then there's this guy gets fucking punched in the face this weird shit happens this other weird shit happens and then they stop and they

focus on a snake's face and the camera is slowly zooming into the snake's face slowly zooming zooming zooming it's almost there and my buddy is standing right next zooming into the snake's face. Slowly zooming, zooming, zooming, zooming. It's almost there. And my buddy is standing right next to me in the crowd. And while it's getting really close, he goes, bam! And everybody

around us jumped in the air. It was fucking amazing. It was amazing. Because it's coming in, it's coming in, and then he screams. And everybody's like, the tension was so high. It was perfect. It was so high. It was perfect. It was so funny.

That is a really memorable concert I went to. Very memorable. I remember being out. I had general admission tickets and I was in the crush. I wasn't in the pit. I was in the crush.

I was trying to be as close as I could to the whole stuff. But I remember that. I have a lot of fond memories of that concert. So we got a message from someone and I'm not going to say who, but they want to know

of a non-AA slash woo substance abuse program for secular people. So a secular program someone, and I'm not going to say who, but they want to know of a non-AA slash woo substance abuse program for secular people. So a secular program that is also an addiction program. We're going to ask people to comment on the Facebook page if you can. That's open to everybody. Go to the Facebook page if you know of a substance abuse program that is secular and doesn't use religion or woo or the AA 12 step program or any of that stuff, comment on the Facebook post for this, this three 96. So hopefully this person can go there and look and find this information. We'll probably also read this information on next week's show, but we wanted to make sure that,

that, uh, that this person had access to it sooner than next week's show. but we wanted to make sure that this person had access to it sooner than next week's show. All right. Well, that's going to wrap it up for this week. We are closing in on hiring a person. So hopefully next week we'll have an announcement for hiring someone to be our podcast coordinator. We want to thank Megan for her service for the many years of putting up with us. Two years of putting up with us. Two years of putting up with us. So thank you, Megan. And we're looking forward to the new person starting up soon. We'll let you know who it is.

And when that happens, you'll be the first to know. Next to that person. That person will know first. And then you'll know right afterwards. Then our significant others. We might tell some other close friends. I don't know if we'll tell them.

You'll be like the fourth or sixth to know. Yeah. You personally. Yeah. You know who I'm talking to. Touch yourself a little. With a very expensive vibrator. On your necklace.

All right. That's going to wrap it up for this week, but we're going to leave you like we always do with the Skeptic's Creed. Credulity is not a virtue.'s fortune cookie cutter mommy issue hypno babylon bullshit couched in scientician double bubble toil and trouble pseudo quasi alternative acupunctuating pressurized stereogram pyramidal free energy healing water downward spiral brain dead pan sales pitch late night info docutainment leo pisces cancer cures detox reflex foot massage death and towers tarot cards psychic healing

crystal balls bigfoot yeti aliens churches mosques and synagogues temples dragons giant worms atlantis dolphins truthers birthers witches, vaccine nuts, shaman healers, evangelists, conspiracy, double-speak stigmata, nonsense. Expose your sides. Thrust your hands. Bloody, evidential, conclusive. Doubt even this. The opinions and information provided on this podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. All opinions are solely that of Glory Hole Studios LLC. Cognitive dissonance

makes no representations as to accuracy, completeness, currentness, suitability, or validity of any information and will not be liable for any errors, damages, or butthurt arising from consumption. All information is provided on an as-is basis. No refunds. Produced in association with the local dairy council and viewers like you.