Cognitive Dissonance - Episode 424: Feet Of The Fish

Episode Date: July 16, 2018

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This episode of Cognitive Dissonance is brought to you by our patrons. You fucking rock. Be advised that this show is not for children, the faint of heart, or the easily offended. The explicit tag is there for a reason. recording live from glory hole studios in chicago this is cognitive dissonance every episode we blast anyone who gets in our way we bring critical thinking skepticism and irreverence to any topic that makes the news makes it big or makes us mad it's skeptical it's political and there is no welcome out this is episode 424 of Cognitive Dissonance. So, Tim, I wanted to get a bunch of audio

of Dr. Oz from his show. So, he has a television show. If you're not familiar with who Dr. Oz is, he's a guy who has a, he's a doctor, a medical doctor. Right. And I want to say a pretty prestigious medical doctor, as I recall.

As I recall, he has, like, you know, I recall. As I recall, he has good credentials. Good credentials. And he has a show on television. And that show is a health show. So what struck me about this is, you know, I mean, he's going to have on, and he has been called out even by Congress for this sort of thing, have on some quacks and some people who, you know, have some dubious medical advice. And, you know, in some ways, you know, I don't know if I, I mean,

it's not that I excuse it, but you expect it. You know what I mean? Like you can expect something like that, at least it's medical advice. This is a clip that blew me away. I couldn't believe that this actually was on his show. And I'm not going to preface it. I'm going to play it this is from dr oz we all love to look up and gaze at the stars civilizations throughout history have looked at astrology to find meaning in

everything from astrology tom here we go buddy astrology when was the last time we talked about astrology uh when was the last time astrology was even remotely relevant to anybody? Like I remember one of the times, like somebody, I don't remember who it was, and it was kind of making fun of astrology. And it's like, it's the idea that, you know,

a ball of light, how many hundreds or thousands or millions of light years away from us would somehow have a different impact on you because you were out of your mother's womb versus in? If they were magic rays, and that was a part that always struck me as amusing. If there was some kind

of magic ray that helped determine certain characteristics about you, why in the world would it be related to your birth? What would be different about the moment you were born than the rest of it? related to your birth? Like, what would be different about the moment you were born than the rest of it? Like, are you growing up inside a lead mother?

Like, you know what I mean? Just like hiding in there. These are magic space rays. Yeah, if that's the case, then an x-ray wouldn't even reveal you. I know. I can't tell. They're all big shears.

Yeah, the ultrasound just keeps bouncing off. It's either a baby or a pencil. We're not sure what's in there. You know, it's interesting because I think that they also talk about the planets. Yeah, the ultrasound just keeps bouncing off. It's either a baby or a pencil. We're not sure what's in there. You know, it's interesting because I think that they also talk about the planets. They certainly talk about how the planets affect you, etc. I am pretty sure that the gravitational force that is inflicted on you by planets and stars like that is probably just as much as a big person walking next to you. It's not a lot.

There's a tiny, tiny, tiny bit of it. Well, and like, why would something, why would the orientation of the stars and the planets matter the moment you were born and then stop mattering the next day? Why wouldn't they take it from conception, right? Why wouldn't it be conception? If it was anything. That would make more sense, right?

At least make more sense. Yeah. Yeah. Like if they're magic space rays that imbue you with certain personality traits, like maybe they imbue you the moment. Maybe it still works, right? Because it's always approximately nine months back from that. Yeah.

My guess, yeah. You know what I mean? So it's kind of a six of one half. It doesn't matter. Choosing. Although that doesn't work either for all the people that are born late or early or, you know, whatever.

Yeah, exactly. A preemie. Do preemies get the same? Like a preemie, would it get the same? It'd get the same because it's your birth date. But that's the thing.

That's why birth is like this weird, strange, arbitrary cutoff. Like the stars are magic and they imbue you with traits, but the day after you're born, they don't anymore. Like they're just like,

ah, fuck that. I'm a baby. I'm strong. What? Yeah, I can fight off the cosmic race. I can fight off the cosmos. Get over here, Carl Sagan.

I'll fucking fist fight a baby. Baby comes out, they're just shooting DNA. The changing seasons to our health. Now, I never studied astrology in medical school. That's because it's garbage. They don't teach it. They don't teach it because it's garbage.

Where science happens. It's no longer considered to be based on science, but I... He even says it. He's like, yeah, no, it's not considered based on science, but I'm going to have a fucking seven-minute conversation with an astrologer.

I am happy to pander to idiots, though. I'm interested in learning more about it. And many of you believe the season of your birth could influence your health. Astrologer Rebecca Gordon is here. She's been practicing astrology for 15 years. But she's not any better at it. She's been practicing for 15

years, not getting any better. Yeah, 10,000 hours doesn't help in the astrology department. She's like the clumsy kid who can't hacky sack.'s just like i keep fucking try just punch it like across the room i'm sorry guys reading this very tiny book i picked up in the supermarket aisle and like one of the impulse buys one of those little tiny so like i've got like she's got like three of the books like they don't match up but i don't know what to do it doesn't seem funny they don't match up but they all seem to be me. Yeah, right. I see

myself in all of these adjectives. When you were a kid, were you exposed at all to any horoscopes? Was it any part of your family life at all? No, no, not my family life, no. I don't think I found out what a horoscope was until high school. Sometime in high school

I heard about them. Yeah. And then I remember thinking that they were interesting. And then, but other than that, like it never like grabbed hold of me or like, you know, it was like, what about you?

When I was a kid, my mom used to get from the supermarket aisle, the little horoscope books. Oh, yeah. So my mom used to get hers all the time. She's a Sagittarius and she used to get

the Sagittarius one all the time. I remember I would read through it as a kid. I would be like, well, what does it say? And it had all kinds of, I mean, like, these were very detailed things. And, you know, as an adult, when you look through things as an adult, you see, like, yeah, it's detailed, but it's also super fucking general, you know? That's how they handle all of these things. They're all super general. And, you know, like, I think this is a classic counting the hits for They're all super general. And you know, like, I think this is a classic

counting the hits, forgetting the misses, where they'll be like, oh, well, you're hardheaded and you're this and this and this, and they'll name like seven traits and you'll be like, yeah, I am hardheaded. And you'll forget about the other six. You'll be like, yeah, I am hardheaded.

And then the rest of it just goes away. But my mom used to get them all the time. And I remember reading through them when I was a child. Did you get yours? I knew what I was. What are you? I was a cancer and I still am. I guess it doesn't change once you get born. What about if you get like chemo? Like, can you change at that point? My horoscope will be in remission.

It's funny because like, I knew what I was, but I remember even when I was a young person, I was like, that's garbage. Like even as a, even as a young person, I knew I was garbage. I knew it was, I think my mom knew it was garbage too. And as I recall, I think she was the one who clued me into it being garbage, but she just had fun with it.

Like for her, it was a fun distraction. And that's the thing. Like if it is just a silly, fun distraction and something to like, yeah, it's like make you smile throughout your day. Yeah.

Right. Like who cares? Yeah. Who cares? You want to do fucking personality Sudoku in the morning? Like, that's exactly it, right? Yeah, just give it a whirl. Like, who gives a shit?

And to be honest, the astrological signs, I don't know how that would affect you anyway. Like, I don't know how. I mean, I know that they can negatively affect you if you start, you know, calling up the astrology hotline or, you know, like certain ways in which you're giving money to those sorts of things, but a tiny bit of money or reading it in the paper. I don't know. I mean, like, what about if you had a horoscope and you believed it and it said like, don't make any big decisions and you decided not to take that job? Yeah. I mean, I guess, you know, like, I don't know if people would do that. I do know. Wasn't it like Reagan who had his wife? Yeah. It his wife. Yeah, okay. It was Nancy who was an astrologer, or at least believed in

astrology. And so some of the, you know, probably later in his presidency when his brainy wasn't working so well, I'm sure maybe there might have been some, you know, some decisions made by an astrologer. We don't know. Your body and your stars.

Thanks for being here. Why are so many folks fascinated by their horoscope? I get a dose of this from my wife daily. Seriously, daily. Just drowned her. Just fucking sick of it. Drowned her. That woman is going to be the fucking death of me. Just when she had her box of wine and goes in for a bath.

That's what you have to do, Doc. Yes, exactly. So to me, there's actually a couple of reasons why. First of all, when you read your horoscope, you get a surge of optimism and hope. And we all like that. Does that sound true to you? You get a surge of optimism and hope? I don't know if I've ever gotten a surge of optimism and hope. I think, you know, like I will say, like there is a-ending human drive to know ourselves better sure and so i do think that it's like it is entirely understandable that like we'll avail ourselves of any tool but particularly the easy and affirming tools things like horoscopes which which purport to

tell us something about ourselves or purport to tell us like give us some guidance on how to move through our day yeah Decisions are hard. Right, yeah. Being people is hard. Being an adult is hard. Yeah, so I get the draw for it, and I get the fun aspect of it, too. I don't think it's because you get a surge of optimism.

Yeah. Like, oh, I was feeling a little pessimistic until I read... Suddenly I got this, yeah. Don't make any big decisions today. Yeah. You know, I'm thinking know, make any big decisions today. Yeah. Like, you know, I'm thinking about this

in a, in another way too. Do you think that when we watch a Dr. Oz show that there's something that because he lends the credibility

of the medical field to his show, there should be something there that has a true ring to it? Yeah. I think this is a problem because of that. I think so, too. I genuinely feel like this is a real issue. This is a real

problem. This is all garbage. There's never been a moment and look, I don't need to debunk it for you. Fucking everybody knows it's all garbage. There's very few people, I think, in the world that think that this is a thing. It's a magical thing. It is. It totally is.

You'll hear the fucking very few people I think in the world that think that this is a thing. It's a magical thing. It is. It totally is. You know, I, I, you'll hear the, the fucking, the, uh, long Island Oompa Loompa talk about this on occasion. She'll have like the medium.

Yeah. The medium will be like, Oh, you're in Venus's rise. She'll say shit like that because like for them, it's just a mishmash of fucking buzzwords, like spirit garbage words. So this works just as well as spirit told me such and

such about such and such. So they'll still use this, this stuff as a way to try to influence people. So, you know, people like that give it credence. And then, you know, Dr. Oz is doing it too. It's on television a couple of times. Yeah. And a lot of people give that, that a lot more credit than they should. And I don't care how much he couches it in the beginning with, well, I didn't learn it because I went to school for thinking about stuff. But like, he's going to spend a few minutes talking about each sign and how it affects your health. So a five, and that does bother me, right? Like if somebody is like, yeah, I'm going to make a health decision based on this. Absolutely. Come the fuck on.

But also, even though the horoscope is directed, speaking to millions of people, everybody feels a bit of personalization when they read a horoscope. Everybody feels that it's... That's because they're all fucking super general. Super easy to get fucking a personalization when you read a horoscope because there's 25 traits and you get to fucking choose your own adventure. Well, yeah. And we do a thing. We all do a thing where it's like, I want to see myself in something. And we're all know, we, we do a thing. We all do a thing where it's like, I want to see myself in something, you know, and that design.

And we're all so multifaceted. It's easy to see yourself in a list of adjectives. And also many of those adjectives are very positive. So you want to think that about yourself. Right. You want to think that you're strong. Oh, it says I'm fun loving. Oh, okay.

You want to think that you're, you stand up for yourself. You want to think that you help other people. Like all those things are, it's not like you're kind of an asshole. Basically you're Mr. Burns. There's never a, there's never a horoscope that's like kill yourself. Right. Yeah. Just end it all. End it all now. Also speaking directly to them. And it is speaking to all members of that sign and what's going on in their life. So how many of you open the paper every day and look at your horoscope first?

See some people up there. Yeah. A lot of folks who do that. And I'm always amazed because I could never quite figure it out. But again, when we go to parties,

I keep hearing interpretations and they sometimes are eerily on target. So explain. You have the worst, but you go to the worst parties. Like, I mean, like genuinely.

I was thinking the same thing. I would rather fucking like go to the place where they fucking bob for apples and drown myself. I would rather fucking like go to the place where they fucking bob for apples and drown myself. I love to. You're supposed to open your mouth, not just suck in through your nose. Just sitting there.

Your face. Fucking convulsing in the barrel. Apples bouncing on your face. I like the idea, too, that like this guy is a doctor. He's like, you know, I've never been able to figure this out. It's the easiest fucking thing to figure out. What can't you figure? I don't know.

I went through all the fucking medical school, but I've never been able to fucking suss out this fucking nonsense. Cut your fucking beating heart out of your body and put a new one in. It's the fucking last page of the TV guide, you fucking idiots. The link between the horoscope and our health, the stars and our bodies are feeling. Sure. Well, we all have seen the drawing of the Vitruvian man by Leonardo da Vinci. Arms like this pinned up there. Exactly. Yes. The human body is actually shaped like a five pointed star. Newsflash stars are fucking round. Also, like it, it's shaped like a star in the sense that it's also shaped like YMCA. If I, like, if I make, it's like, I don't, people don't walk around fucking just spread eagle all the time.

Most of the time we're shaped like a fucking stick. Like an eye. Like a meat stick. Yeah. What's hilarious because it's like both your legs are at a weird angle and you're and it's like, yeah, I guess you're only shaped like that on occasion. And why is that even significant? Stars are not pointed. Right.

Stars are fucking balls of gas that are fucking nuclear on fire. That's not a, there's no point. You know, if you reorient the human body, it still isn't shaped like a star. Unless like you curl up into like a tight fetal position. If I could turn myself into a sphere and light yourself up. So like if you're a fucking monk in Vietnam. Look, mom, I'm a star. Baby, you're a star.

With a head, two arms, two legs. And you also may have seen. Yeah. Like we're the only things in the world with a head, two arms, two legs. And you also may have seen... Yeah, like, we're the only things in the world with a head, two arms, and two legs. Like, I'm laughing thinking of a starfish right now. Basically... That looks more like a star.

It looks more like a star than us, but it's like every single fucking mammal is that. That's pretty standard. Yeah, it's a standard mammal fucking... Symmetry, right. Yeah, we all got the same load out from the dealership. The drawing of the Zodiac Man, where you see Ares ruling the head, the first sign of the Zodiac. Yes.

But you could just draw that in any order you want to draw that. It's a drawing. It's a drawing. It's not like a proof of something. You could literally just draw something else. You could just put whatever you want. You'd be like oh gemini's the face now for fuck's sake well have you noticed these two drawings that i drew look

alike we put one on the xerox machine what the fuck pulling the feed and all of the other body part a pointed star with a head two arms two legs and you also may have seen the drawing of the Zodiac Man where you see Ares ruling the head, the first sign of the Zodiac. Pisces ruling the feet. Pisces are ruling the feet. They got the fish boots. That's all I got.

It's these fish boots. All I got is the fish boots. If you've never seen Suicide Kings, watch it. It's a great film. And all of the other body parts correlating to different Zodiac signs. So the point is that... Which one correlating to different zodiac signs.

So the point is that... Which one correlates to the balls? Which one's the balls? Cancer, unfortunately. Just ask Armstrong. Just ask Lance Armstrong. As you go through life, you start losing them. They're running away, but they're just running south all the time. A zodiac sign doesn't just govern personality traits.

And all of the zodiac signs live within you. And this is really about... Wait, if they all live within you, then what the fuck does it matter? Maybe one lives more much strong. One is big strong and the others are small medium strong. The shark in the womb

of the mother and eats all the other sharks. Balancing all of the signs within your body. So today we're going to take an in-depth look at every astrological sign. Oh, please, let's do that. Gosh, I can't wait. This is going to be amazing. All right. Cecil, you're cancer?

I am. So when we get to cancer. Yeah. Which one are you? You're Pisces. I'm Pisces. You're Pisces, right. Yep.

About how Rebecca says the stars can help you take control of your health. I only know that because my brother is also born in the same month. I was a little the stars can help you take control of your health. I only know that because my brother is also born in the same month. I was a little kid. My brother's born in the same month. So when I was a kid, I knew what one that was.

So Pisces, I know. I know like the ones that my family were. Right. So I know like, you know, I know like my mom and my brother or my mom was a Sagittarius.

My brother and my dad were Capricorns. My other one was a Pisces and I know I was a Cancer. But I don't know any of the rest. Like, I don't know where they all go. Wait a minute, your good brother a Pisces? My good brother's a Pisces. Okay, that works for me. The bad brother, the one I don't talk

to is a Capricorn. And my dad, I don't talk to him anymore. He is also a Capricorn. That's harder to do. Yeah, it's tough. He's a great listener now. Just shake the asses. Dad, are you in there? Sugar, sugar, sugar, sugar. Dad, are you in there? Sugar, sugar, sugar, sugar. In fact,

Happy Father's Day. I got you a beer. Oh, you just mix it in. Oh. It works. And this is really about balancing all of the signs within your body.

So today, we're going to take an in-depth look at every action. You know how you do that? Those foot pads that you put on your body. So today we're going to take an in-depth look at every action. You know how you do that? Those foot pads that you put on your body. The detox foot pads. The detox foot pads totally balance out the signs in your body. I like that.

I used a fair bit of those one time when we first started. Everyone's a critic. Yeah. I put about a dozen of them on me. They all looked exactly the same. The one I put in the sink looked exactly the same. The same, it turns out. The more you sweat, the worse they got.

And they got pretty bad. It's a logical sign to find out how Rebecca says the stars can help you take control of your health. In fact, our audience is divided today into where they fall

on the Zodiac. And now, they're going to fight. He just rolls out like two swords to each one. You will fight it out. We will find out

what the best Zodiac is. Choose a champion! Like, what the fuck what the best Zodiac is. Choose a champion. Like, what the fuck? Best Zodiac comes out on top and you'll get the car. The rest of you don't get a car.

I'm not fucking Oprah. Come on now. I'm calling you guys. Make sure this resonates with you as you hear it. So we'll start with Gemini. Oh yeah, I'm sure that's going to work.

Yeah, let's do, let's make sure, let's do this peer-reviewed talk. Guys, you know, you say it's the hands of the twins since i'm a gemini i'm going to selfishly ask about my sign first so what i have to worry about so yes gemini rules the arms and the hands of the body and also the concept of communication so it makes a lot of sense stop your face your face for fuck's sake it also rules the concept of communication it is my concept

what concept I would tell you but I don't have to it's communication see fuck the concept not communication not like the concept not communication not like the concept of it it's my concept we get

we get one we all get to pick one can only have conceptual communication Pisces got the concept of time so it's like an infinity gauntlet if you collect all the gems you have ultimate power. God, this shit is stupid. You are a Gemini seeing that you are a surgeon.

And also you host a talk show where you speak and share information with the math. Oh, my God. Everybody uses their arms and their legs, their hands, their mouth. Who doesn't do that? Who's got a job? OK, name a job that doesn't involve your hands or the concept of communication. Name a single thing you can do. Like the only people that don't is like locked in syndrome.

Right. That's it. That's what you got. Yeah. That's not a lie. I'm sorry. That's just not. Stephen Hawking was a lie.

Yeah, but he's communicating. Yeah, I guess that's true. His job is to communicate. He did have communication. You know, it's hilarious because it's just like, oh, yeah, and here's the thing that a doctor does. And this is, you know, like it's like you have your arms and you use your hands. How often does a doctor use his arms over his brain? You know what I mean?

Like you walk in like the doctor rarely touches me, but he sure fucking talks to me a lot. Right. Figures out what the fuck's wrong with me, you know, figures out and has to have a giant, deep body of knowledge. They didn't talk about the mind. They talked about communication. Anybody would fit that role though. If somebody was like, yeah, I run a jackhammer

all day. I work on websites. I have to communicate with the person who I'm working with. And I've got to type with my hands. And I've got to move the mouse around and fucking go to Wix and make a website for them. Like our fucking hands? Yeah, I know.

Our grabbers? Yeah. Jesus, this is going to get long. Symmetrical grabbers? My wife says I'm schizophrenic. That's what she says Geminis mean. That's probably a separate topic. Maybe that's not related to other Geminis.

How about Aries? That's the head of the ram, as you pointed out earlier. What's in store for their health? Yes, Aries tend to- I know, what was in store for his health. Nothing. All she said was you're a doctor. Yeah, you're a doctor. That's nothing in store for his health. What's in store for every Gemini's health is that they're doctors. I'm going to kill myself. You're going to watch me. How about Ares? That's the head of the ram, as you pointed out earlier.

What's in store for their health? Yes. Aries tend to ram headfirst into everything in life. And it's very much a sign of me. And they can be so directed and so forward moving that often they can also become blocked in the head, which can result in things like migraines, tension around the jaw, sinus pressure as well when we become too headstrong. Oh, God! Somebody's out there like, I get headaches. I also, also my head hurts on occasion.

Sometimes I get a stuffy nose. Oh, it's probably because you're fucking Aries. It's probably because you're a person. Oh, that's the alternative. Let's see, to summarize, Gemini's use their hands and Ares get a common cold.

I see myself in all of these. Ares run headfirst into things. They don't know. Well, they don't have their arms because of Geminis. So they just bang into doors with their face. They're all Ram Man

from fucking the He-Man universe. Poof. Right. They knocked out Castle Grayskull's door. The drawbridge goes out, though. I never understood that. i don't understand that i always tried to like go through the drawbridge and i'm just like just take a couple steps back and pull it you're fine you gotta pull it that's how it works it comes down it doesn't go out yeah no drawbridge goes in what the fuck it's a bridge

yeah for your moat it's draw bridge you draw up the bridge unless you for your moat. It's draw bridge. You draw up the bridge. It doesn't. Unless you put the moat on the inside of your castle. The problem is that he was a Gemini and he didn't understand communication. So that was the. Somebody built it without using their hands. It's an Aries and he banged his face up. God, this is dumber than I thought it would be.

Fuck. And also blocked. How about the Taurus sign? That's neck of the bull? Yes, Taurus rules the neck. So when we become choosers... Who got that one? Well, it's because that's where you put the yolk, right? Is that what it is? But like,

you're getting assigned body parts like here's the hands, here's the head. You got the neck. That one's a really powerful neck. Here you go. You got the swiveler. Hey there, skippy neck. Nice neck on you there, kiddo. You got the swiveler. Hey there, skippy neck. Nice neck on you there, kiddo. You know what?

You'll pretty much be forgotten until sometimes you wake up for no reason and hurt for three days. Four days? You're just like, fuck. Chiropractors love Tauruses. Right?

They just love them. Massage parlors, chiropractors. The people who hand out those whiplash things. All of them. Right, those little people dog collar things. Like the little whiplash.

Stuck in our daily routine and too stuck in the material world, we can get stiff in life and that tension also resides in the area of the neck. Oh, my fucking God. Literally.

Oh, my God. Oh, my fucking God. I was kidding. I was fucking God. I was kidding. I was fucking kidding. You were kidding. I was fucking kidding and that's what she said. I want to confirm

that Tom has never heard this before. Tom didn't even know where to find this clip. So Tom has never heard this before. That just... This is the stupidest

fucking thing, Cecil. It's getting worse. Who's the Taurus? Where are the Taurus folks up here? Go up here. You have a stiff neck today? How's your neck?

Stiff neck? No? Erection? Anything stiff? Hopefully they're all on one side of him and they're all looking one way and they're like, yeah, it hurts.

It's painful. A little stiff today. Let me go to you. What's your name? Rochelle. So what did you think about what you just heard? Yeah, that definitely is true

because like for my profession, I slam my face. That's Aries. That's Aries, yeah. I'm very materialistic. I get into rear end accidents a lot. Snaps my neck, I get whiplash. Wouldn't it be great if she was like, I am just incredibly materialistic. Like I've sold a baby.

That would be awesome. That would be awesome. I'm an esthetician, so I do a lot of facials and I get a lot of pain in my neck. That's just how you move your body because you're nothing to do with the stars or the fucking moon

or whatever. As you're looking forward, one star is pulling your head down. Oh my fucking God. Your Venus is in Don't tell me about my God. That's control over your venus is in. Don't tell me about my venus. That is, it's cold. Fuck you. Alright, it gets cold. I went swimming. Spot on. They all sound like you guys?

Yes. My sister's a Taurus. Oh yeah. Everybody else has the tissue with a stiff neck. Does that sound like you? How would that sound like you? You know, this is easy to test. You just say, okay, well, you were born between these 22 days or however long there. If you got this job more than other people, at least it's testable, right?

Like it's like, are more, are more P or more Aries, you know, fucking coal miners than other people. You know what I mean? Like what is it? Slamming their head against the side of the fucking mine. Drilling as they bang their face down. You know, he's dynamite now, but back in the day. Oh, my God.

We used astrological signs. Bang your face across it. The stubbornness goes there, too. Maybe the stubbornness in all Zodiac signs. All right. Next up, the cancers. Now, the cancers rule the chest, right? That's where you have them on that picture. I do have big moobs.

Yeah, they do rule the chest. Sure. So what kinds of problems they run into? Right. So the cancers rule the chest, which is the protective shell, and also the emotional body. So when cancers tend to become overly protective, they become hardened on the outside, so as to not sharing their emotions with others. And when that happens, energy is blocked and this can result in water retention, cysts, and things like this, an overall feeling of blocked energy. So if I don't share my emotions, I get cysts? What the fuck are you talking about? I have an overall feeling of blocked energy. Let's go. Dr. Oz, what if somebody came to you and said, I have an overall feeling of blocked energy? You's go. Dr. Oz, what if somebody came to you and said,

I have an overall feeling of blocked energy? You'd ask him a question called, I'm going to ask you a question I need you to answer in a way that makes sense. That is garbage. That is fucking nonsense.

Or he would immediately diagnose them with a cyst. That would be the other option. I have water retention. Like, okay, that's everybody sometimes. I got fucking water retention if I eat too much salty food.

Are you kidding me? It's like I have a whole fucking jar of pickles. I have some fucking water retention. It's not because I didn't share my fucking feelings. It's because you ate them. And how about the Leos? Where are my Leos? You guys are actual lions.

You're actually a lion. They're so excited about their own Zodiac. They're like, I'm here on a bachelorette party. We're going to fuck Dr. Oz. They always have big personalities. My sisters are Leo. How many sisters do you have?

Just a hundred. Didn't he talk about his sister already? Just so many. They're the heart of the lion. Explain that. Which is not in the chest, by the way. What the fuck? So it's not the chest of the cancer.

It's the heart. God, I hope that they get declawed. I want to know which one's the lungs. Exactly. So Leos are ruled by the sun, the center of the solar system. And Leos are the most creative sign. And they're also a sign of leadership and creativity. If you think about the sun's rays shining out to the world.

That doesn't make any sense. What you just said makes no sense. Leadership, creativity. It's like the sun's rays shining out to the world. What the fuck does that even mean? I can't understand that at all. And you know what? I don't want to. I can't understand that at all. And you know what? I just want to say that

in another language. I don't want to. I don't want to know that. Like, I am dumber for hearing those words. So when the Leo becomes too exaggerated, you know,

people start to puff their chest away out, hinge the shoulders back, and this kind of posture. Don't they have too good a posture? Like, you just described good posture.

Really good posture, those Leos. And their fucking breasts look pert and perky. It's so they're pressing their breasts toward the sun. And so you get that perfect, you know, that shadow boob that you get going, which is nice, you know what I mean? An imbalance in posture can result in a lot of tension in the upper back as well.

We're back with astrologer Rebecca Gordon, who says your astrological sign can help you understand your health. So the 10th sign is the Capricorn sign, the knees of the goat. What do you have to be worried about there? They have to be worried about their legs going backwards at the knee,

which is what happens when you're a Capricorn because they're... Sometimes when you're a Capricorn, you'll try to scrabble up the side of a mountain and you'll twist your ankle. So what the fuck? Or you'll go for a swim because don't they have like a tail thing too? The Capricorn? Yeah, the Capricorn.

Oh, I don't know. What's the actual sign of a Capricorn? Like what's the actual... It's like a half goat. I thought it was a goat. It's like a half goat, half fish. Yeah, no, you're right. It's a mergoat. Mergoat. Oh no. I gotta show you the mergoat It's a mer-goat. It's a mer-goat. Oh, no. I gotta show you the mer-goat.

Look at the mer-goat. The 38. Tom, Tom, we're at a site here. That's a tattoo. 38 best tattoo designs for Capricorns. That lives on someone's body forever.

Oh, these are so bad. Could you imagine having this on you? I got a mare goat on my... Oh, gosh. I'm going to put a link to these. Goat fish. I got a goat fish on my body that never goes away. Oh, my God. They look so ridiculous. They're goes away. Oh my God.

They look so ridiculous. They're the worst. Oh, we're going to put a link on the show notes. Go up, go up, go up a couple more. We got to go to the goat fish. Oh, some of these are so bad. Yes. So Capricorns tend to take on a lot of responsibility.

It's a very pragmatic sign. And when we take- My dad was the least responsible person I've ever met in my life. That's so amazing. What is the time period for Capric person. That's so amazing. What is, what is the, what is the time period for Capricorn? It's, it's in January.

So my dad was at January 18th. It's funny because my wife is also a Capricorn. She's not right. Your wife is incredibly responsible. But my dad was like, fuck it. And he was an alcoholic who lost his job. I don't know.

I don't know. We can call that responsible. Oh my God. We've taken on too much responsibility and put too much weight on our shoulders. That all goes to the knees, and that brings pressure to the knees. Too much weight on your shoulders goes to your knees? Why does it go to your shoulders? It goes to your lower back.

Oh, my God. It's a little closer than your knees. To the knees, which could be weakness. And then the knees could, of course, buckle. How about Aquarius? It's a water sign. Oh, joint pain in your knees. Joint pain in your knees. Which could be weakness. And then the knees could, of course, buckle. How about Aquarius? It's a water sign. Oh, joint pain in your knees. Joint pain in your knees. Okay. Alright, as a human being, as a bipedal human being, joint pain

in your knees. So now we've got headaches and a bum knee. Yeah. Okay, that's everyone I've ever met. You say it's also the ankles of the water bearer. Is that their weakness, their ankles? It is. Exactly. So Aquarius is the sign. Aquarius actually reminds us about our individuality

and our uniqueness in the world. And the ankles enable you to stand on one foot and stand up on your own in the world as well. What the fuck? It enables you to stand on one foot? I could do that without an ankle.

If my ankle was fused. If you could balance well, you could do that without an ankle. If my ankle was fused. If you could balance well, you could do that with a peg. You don't even need a foot. You don't need ankles. You can have one of those springy things that they give to the vets who come back. Right. One of those springy

leaf springs that you get. One of the springies that we give to them when they want to do the tough mutter. Right. The kangaroo legs. One of the leaf springs that you get. One of the springies that we give to them when they want to do the tough mutter. Right? Yeah. Yeah. The kangaroo legs. The kangaroo legs. They give you an out.

So it's very important to have strong ankles also to be mindful of your individuality. Wait, why does my ankles make me more of an individual? My ankles really make me. I got cankles. Does that count? I don't have much taper in that thing. And the ability to maintain balance within. And I want the very bottom ones, our feet, the Pisces,

which you say is our fish, the feet of the fish. The feet of the fish! The feet of the fish! Fish don't even have feet! What the fuck? What does the feet of the fish mean? What does have feet. What the fuck? What does feet of the fish mean? What does feet of the fish mean? It's the feet of the fish.

It's the feet of the fish. It's the feet of the fish. They get up and they got little boots on their flippers. They're just slapping around and not doing anything. They're just like... I heard you turn this fish over and over. I can't find his feet. Let's do a little tap dance.

Oh, my God. The best part is this guy's a doctor. He doesn't know that fish don't have feet. It's really the wings of the bear. My jaw hurts. It must be an Aries. I'm going to have a heart attack. Oh, gosh.

You're a Leo. Oh, my God. Okay. That would be awesome if you went to the emergency room and you're like, yeah, I think I'm having a heart attack and they just like pull off like, you know,

like your next number, but it just says Leo on it. Triage by astrological side. I have corns on the feet of the fish. Here's your Pisces. All they give you is like a fish scaler. Here you go. Take this off.

Feet of the fish. Feet of the fish. Feet of the fish. All right. The feet are literally the connection between the spiritual being and the physical world. That is literally what they are. That is not figurative. That's a human. That is the literal connection between two non-existent things.

And that is what Pisces rules, the connection between spiritual and physical. And that is what Pisces rules, the connection between spiritual and physical. And when that is out of balance within somebody, we can often see challenges around the foot area. Challenges around the foot area? What does that even mean? Like you got sore biscuits. Challenges. Get some fucking soft soles.

Go to Dr. Scholl instead of Dr. Oz. Are you kidding me right now? What the fuck? So you say no matter what sign we are, there are a couple things that you found to be effective. So they probably help individual astrological signs,

but they can help all of us no matter. So the first is this issue of how we stand. You said that we have to build individuality by learning to stand on one foot

rather than two. Oh my God, please say they're're gonna do like a fucking flamingo stance that would be amazing karate kid this is gonna be the karate kid moment no can defend time oh we've done right yeah so what does that do specifically how do you do it right so remember we're speaking about aquarius and the sign of standing on your own in the world and your own individuality, not allowing yourself to be too swayed by the ideas and opinions of others. And the standing on one foot is a wonderful meditation of mind and body. So you just stand up like this. Exactly. And we can plan our left foot down and just rest your right foot there. Oh, you're doing a great job. Stand on one foot. Yeah.

Oh, you're doing a great job standing on one foot. Are you three? Are you fucking three? I could get my son to do that. My son is in fucking early intervention for being clumsy and he can do that. Standing on one foot. Are you, are you kidding me right now? That's how we're going to fix our...

Like so far, I've got a headache and my shoulders are sore and I'm just like, well, we can fix it by standing on one foot. And you'll be grounded and be connected to the energies. Oh my God. I knew this was coming.

They'll do anything fancy like this or they'll rise up like this. What do I do? You got to do it too. You can separate them. If you separate them, I'll fall. Do I have to do it on both sides? Yes, it's great to do it on both sides to balance the right and the left side of your body. Then you'll be over easy. The last tip you have is one that I've been giving for years. Come on over. It's to use a neti pot to clean our

sinuses. Now, I don't know how this part fits into astrology. It's fun. Well, let's figure it out. I know, right? Let's figure it out. But explain again, as someone who studies the world through the stars, why using a neti pot might be helpful. Sure. Well, you don't have to be an Aries zodiac sign to want to clear your head. You have the five senses in your head, and of course, your brain is in your head, which controls your whole. senses in your head and of course your brain is in your head which controls your whole it's debatable for you i'm not sure also i have i have the sense of touch in like my whole fucking body i don't just have a sense

you're like patting everything with your head you're like come here here, puppy. Oh, my God. Slamming your face in. My whole body fell asleep. Fuck. Just your face feels touched. That's why when you get slapped, it hurts so much. The rest of you could get fucked up. It doesn't matter. You can't feel anything. Literally, it wouldn't matter.

It wouldn't matter. Just my face feels. You can fuck this thing. I can't even tell. It doesn't matter. Just don't fuck my mouth. It doesn't feel that. Body. Comes my mouth. Just don't feel that. ...body.

Comes in handy, yes. Right? So don't we all want to clear our heads? The neti pot's fantastic. It's been used for thousands of years, as you probably know. You do it together? Are they going to fucking hose out their fucking sinuses on TV?

Hose out the nose. That's what they're going to do. And they do it in front of everybody. And it's hilarious because she can't talk while she's doing it. And he's having a, he's seriously, no shit,

pouring fucking, like, water and jooks out of his nose as he's, as he's finishing the segment. Like, I'm not even kidding.

I'll play it. I'm going to play it. Listen to him. He's talking with a neti pot shoved up his nose. Okay. This is a practice you get involved in.

What do you guys think? Should we do it? All right. Never warm water. Why it practice you get involved in? What do you guys think? Should we do it? All right. Never warm water. Why would anyone want to watch this? I don't know. Why? It's like an enema.

Why would you watch it? Like, if you need it, you need it. An enema? But I don't want to see it. No, I want to see that. It's a face enema. No, I'd watch that Pornhub channel. Come on now.

Again, private time. The Netty Pot channel all day. God, you know, I wonder if there is Netty Pot porn. I'll bet you there is. I guarantee. Netty Pot porn sounds good. God, somebody's going to send it to us now. Yeah. There's a whole subreddit of Netty Pot porn. Of course there is. They're super bored. They're pouring jooks out of their nose and getting fucked in the ass.

Hi there. My brain is feeling cleaner already. Is Rebecca doing it or not? I can't tell. Yes, I'll say, Chris. You can find all of his information. Why are you talking? Why is this compelling? I'm on my website.

I want to thank you all for being here. Rebecca, nice job. For more on star secrets and Rebecca's booking, check it out. It's called Your Body, The Stars. Your Body and The Stars. Isn't that amazing? I can't believe that just happened.

Isn't that amazing? You just hear the water pittering as it's pouring out of his nose and his nasal. It's like, why would you do that on TV? That's your private shame time. Don't ever take anything Dr. Oz has ever said for anything,

period. I don't even care if he's your personal physician. At this point, yeah, I'd just be like, no, I need a prescription for another doctor. Right? You know, we can squeeze you in with Dr. Oz. Oh, so you have no appointments available. Do you? Would you just happen to have a ceremonial knife

I could kill myself with? Ready to stick it in the glory hole? Get links to their Facebook, Twitter, and if you still use it, Google Plus account at their website, dissonancepod.com. If you need to be all discreet about it, contact them by email at dissonance.podcast atancepod.com. If you need to be all discreet about it, contact them by email

at dissonance.podcast at gmail.com. Or you can call and leave a ransom message at 740-74-DOUBT. That's 740-743-6828. Want to hear Cognitive Dissonance commercial free and gain access to exclusive content, including full patron-only shows, head to patreon.com forward slash dissonance pod and become a patron to support the show on a per episode basis. Love commercials? Not ready to become a patron? Give the guys a five-star review on iTunes or Stitcher, or tell your buddies in the drunk tank about the show. We want to send a big sloppy glory hole to all the patrons and people who rate us. You fucking rock.

This story is from Right Wing Watch. This is Perry Stone. Many world leaders are eluciferians who pray to Satan before dinner. I think that's nice. It's nice to have family dinner. Did you guys pray before dinner? We never did,

but I have in-laws who do. Yeah, my dad, we held hands and you prayed before dinner. No kidding. Every day until my dad stopped doing church. Until he stopped doing church and then he came home one day and he's like, we're not praying anymore.

He just never initiated it. We never initiated it without him. So like when my dad, my dad went to church twice a week and he was on the board of trustees and he was part of the church until he got in an argument with somebody at church

and he never went again and we stopped praying and that was it is he still a believer your dad I don't know he won't talk about it

like I try to get him to talk about it once or twice and he kind of dodges it so I'm not real sure if he still believes it yeah or not

huh but I know he got mad one time and cut that out of his life. Does he think he knows you're not right? Very much. Yeah. Okay. Yeah.

He doesn't give a shit. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. . Yeah, he was concerned for your immortal soul. My dad was worried about it. He was like, oh, I don't want to see you again after I die. I was like, neither of us is going to do that.

So we're good. Right. We're good on that. Yeah. We're okay there, bro. No worries. All right. This guy,

first off, this guy is dressed like Dr. Evil. That's all I'm saying. He is. Oh my God, you're right. He's dressed exactly like Dr. Evil.

Dressed exactly like Dr. Evil. Turtleneck with a well, way bigger than it should be, coat that is cut exactly like Dr. Evil. He looks crazy. All right, so here we go. I've never seen this guy, Perry Stone. Under the Obama administration, I received a visit from a gentleman who is a billionaire.

And he's from a country that he is involved with a business. He has a huge factory in Germany, and he is involved with the business. And he wanted, he actually came to me, and this is a little bit humorous, y'all will laugh, especially my partners, because he thought I knew President Obama personally. I was like, I don't know any black people. And I never, and I would look, I'd love to, I'd love to meet any president we have. I don't care if it's Obama. I mean, he's the president. It's a, it's an honor to meet any, but would y'all agree with me?

It's an honor because of the position. I'd meet the Pope. My goodness. I mean, I did. And fuck the Pope, by the way. I'll just, I'll meet any celebrity really. Like, is there anybody that wants to talk to me? I would like to meet your neighbor, Debbie.

Like, I literally, like, just fucking nobody. They don't even wave to me when I drive home anymore. Like, just somebody talk to me. I'm so lonely. Follow-up question. Your neighbor, Debbie, did she do Dallas? Because it's so totally interested in meeting her. The girl next door.

Most of all, I don't know about, no, obviously that's the difference between me and you. That's why God don't open any doors for you. That's why God opens doors for me to meet world leaders. And he doesn't open anything for any of you scumbags. Laugh at my jokes. God damn. It's like real judging.

It's like, yeah, I'm more important than you because of my importance. That's why I'm more important than you. You can measure it through my importance. What a fucking asshole thing to say. He's Dr. Evil. I know what's best about me, my humility or how great I am. I'll just talk to any of them. Come on. You can't help somebody unless you're in their life. You can't speak to them unless they know you. But anyway, it was kind of humorous because he said, do you know the president? I said, I'm sorry. I don't. He said, oh, well, I see you on TV all

the time and I see you in Israel and I thought maybe you could help me. And then he began to talk to me. He said, I am a man that my country owes me $700 million. And he said, they owe me because of a system that I put into that country. And the guy with him said, look, this guy's not blowing smoke here. I've known him for years. This is the real deal. They owe him for a system he put into that country? In Germany. Don't tell me it's... He's an oven man.

Blodgett. His name is Blodgett. He didn't make the final solution. And he was going to do some business work in the United States. And he just wanted to try to see if he could have a meeting to talk about how he would be able to help the United States. Would you happen to have a problem with the Jews here? I can do something for you. Say something to me that I will never forget.

And this is going to probably amaze some of you. We begin to talk about world leaders and world leaders that he had sat with. And he said something to me that I had never heard in my life. He said to me, he said, you'd be shocked how many of the world leaders, especially in Europe, are Luciferians. What? Here we go.

What? Here we go. You'd be shocked. Aren't they mostly atheists over there? Just like, well, they don't fucking do any of that shit. How many of you guys can do your thing? This is a guy who sits with world leaders

and has fucking dinner with them. Yeah, right. Like I'm sitting with Angela with world leaders and has fucking dinner with them. Yeah, right. Like, I'm sitting with Angela Merkel or whatever. I'm sitting with, like, Theresa May. Come the fuck on. What's crazy is he's just like, like, yeah, I can meet all these other world leaders, but I can't meet yours.

Yeah, that's the other thing, right? Like, yeah, like, oh, okay, I need an in to get to Obama, but all these other world leaders are just at my table. He needs an in and he goes to this guy? He's going to some random dude? He's like, uh, Angela other world leaders are just at my table. He needs an in and he goes to this guy? He's like, he's like, Angela, can you know? Hold on. Is there a weird

dude named Perry Stone you can put me in touch with? Let me get a televangelist on the phone. I bet he can hook me up. Zeno black people? He's American. All you Americans know each other, right? You all look alike. We call him a Luciferian or Luciferian. And I said, wait, we call him a Luciferian or a Luciferian? Or a Luciferian. You have your choice. Oh, okay. You can call him either one. I'm going to go with Luciferian or Luciferian. And I said... Wait, we call him a Luciferian or a Luciferian?

Or a Luciferian. You have your choice. You can call him either one. I'm going to go with Luciferian. That's the one I was going to use. I'll use the other one then, Luciferian. Damn it, I changed my answer. I have never heard that term before. Now, if you go to the internet and look it up...

Oh, yes, you have. Even if you haven't heard that term, it's got the word Lucifer in the front of it. It's pretty easy to pay attention to the root and the suffix. Jesus. I ought to look it up because I'm really fucking stupid. It gives you this information, but it's a little bit hokey because this is a secret cobble of people. And I said, well, you're going to have to explain to me what a Luciferian is.

He said these individuals are from the Catholic and Orthodox backgrounds, so they have a Christian background when they were raised. But as they got older and were educated in the universities, they had a twisted concept of Lucifer or Satan. What is the twisted concept? I mean, like, nobody's out there being like, hey, guys, I want to tell you about the person who's really, really misunderstood. It's a bad guy from the Bible. Yeah. No one knows what it's like to be the sad man. No one knows what it's like to be the bad man.

Terrible. Seriously, though. I know. What are you doing? It's a villain. Yeah. It's a villain. You're just like, guys, he's a super relatable character.

Let me explain. And this guy's dressed as Dr. Evil. Yeah. Nobody's like, oh, man, that Mr. Smith is super awesome from the Matrix. I'm a Smithian. Everybody's just like, no, that guy sucks. He's really misunderstood. He's fucking stupid.

I hate it when he grabs fucking Morpheus's head and licks his sweat. They said they read a verse. Somebody said one of their leaders a long time ago read a verse in Luke where Satan was tempting Jesus and said, bow and worship me and I'll give you the kingdoms of the world for they're delivered to me and whosoever I will, I give them. And he said, they looked at that verse and said, wait a minute, Satan owns world kingdoms. So if we associate ourself with Satan and we give our allegiance to him, he has the power to give us the world kingdoms. That literally makes as much sense as any of the rest of your Bible jumbo-wumbo.

Also, though, it doesn't make any sense. But it makes the same amount of sense as any other scripture. Yeah, you could just interchange it. But that's a stupid thing to think. Because he's clearly like in that passage saying. Don't contextualize this now. Because that's not what we do when we read the Bible. We don't look at the context such as who Satan was talking to at the time.

Or what might have motivated him. So the villain's talking to the hero, right? And he says, you know what? Do this stuff and I'll help you out. And I thought, man, the villain's really helpful. Did you know that I paid $25,000 to someone once? Now they sold me a car. Yeah.

But now it turns out I have to give $25,000 to anybody. I wasn't a transaction or anything. Because I did this one time in one set of contacts. Because he was trying to strike a deal with Jesus. It was, I'll do this if you do that. If you do that. Right? It's a tit for tat.

Right. It's like the quid pro quo doesn't work without the pro quo. I'll give you some kingdoms. You give me a handy. Right. We'll fucking work this out. Happy endings for everybody. Just across the board.

Give us countries and nations and to make a lot of money. So he said they don't view Satan as a fallen angel or a bad person. They view Satan as someone who got a bum rap. Are they just reading the Bible in English and they don't read English? Because I don't know how you do that. First off, I don't think the devil is in a lot of the book. I think that whole fallen angel stuff, that's a Catholic book. Like there's, I think that whole fallen angel stuff, like that's all Catholic mythology. I think it's all mythology.

I, I remember, look, I've never read the fucking book. I don't care about the book, but I remember people telling me, and you know, like,

again, it's only as much as they tell me, but I remember people like, yeah, there's not a lot of mention of that devil thing. Like, that's not a lot of thing that comes up in there. I don't think the devil comes up narratively very often at all.

I mean, like there's a, there's, there's the job thing. The hell thing doesn't come not a lot of thing that comes up in there. I don't think the devil comes up narratively very often at all. I mean, like, there's the Job thing. And the hell thing doesn't come up a lot either. But there's certainly a rich tradition of hell that we have after the fact with paintings and then with stories written by Dante. And all that. Yeah. So there's a lot of mythology tacked on to hell that happened well after the fact because people were just interpreting really bad shit that they could do to people they didn't like. Right. Yeah.

And he said, what really shocks me is I go to dinner, I go to state dinners with a handful of these real high-level business people in some of the nations of Europe, and the guests will say, shall we arise together and pray to our father, Lucifer? Oh, good Lord, they do not do that. Nobody is doing that. Ever. Are you kidding me? Fucking Lucian Greaves they do not do that nobody is doing that ever are you kidding me

fucking Lucian Greaves doesn't even do that are you kidding me that you are a stupid person making things up to scare old people that is exactly what's happening right now because that that entire fucking audience is either you're making old uneducated people feel scared. They get the tingles at this. And I said, this really happens. He says, it absolutely happens. He said, it frightens me to no end because I'm a believer and I bow my head and pray to the name of Jesus. But he said, I say once, no, but I'm actually praying to Jesus. I won't pray. I won't pray to you, Lucifer at all. Pray to Jesus. No, for a fact that there are people in high places who have dedicated or given themselves over to Lucifer,

thinking he's not a bad angel. God gave him a bad rap because he's jealous of him, and he has the authority over the nations of the world. So if you're going to be a world leader— Well, why did he get that authority? Just none of this works. None of this works at all. I love this. It's got a bad rap, guys. That's how it works. You have to be

Christian to believe in Satan. Nobody else believes in Satan. Nobody else thinks Satan's real except the Christians. That's the thing that makes me fucking crazy about this. I don't think they're Satan. That's not true. It's just a weird thing you guys think about sometimes to jerk

off to sadness or whatever you guys do to personify bad things. Right. Yeah. Yeah. So like but like Buddhists don't believe in Satan and the fucking Hindus don't believe in Satan. Like if you don't, if you're not a Christian, you don't think that's a real thing. Yeah. That's just something you guys do.

You want answers? I think I'm entitled. You want answers. I want the truth. You can't handle the truth. This starts from right wing watch Paul McGuire. America is controlled by a hidden network of practicing pedophiles. How much they practice though?

I mean, how often do you have to practice in order to be a, to go pro to be a practicing pedophile? Yeah. I don't know. Like, is there like a pedophile draft, like fantasy pedophilia or something? Do they have a pedophile combine? Like measuring the ass on them? They're like hurling babies or something.

It's all Scottish. It's weird. It's like one of those old slave auctions. They're walking up, grabbing the junk. This guy, by the way, is recording from what appears to be a combination, like retro living room slash apocalypse bunker. It looks like a bad hotel library. Oh, it does.

You know what I mean? Like with a bad lighting. And he looks, this guy looks dead. Like I, this guy looks sick and almost dead. He appears to have

every disease simultaneously. Not fat, sick and almost dead. He appears to have every disease simultaneously. Not fat, sick, and almost dead. Just skinny, sick, and almost dead. But here's cutting to the chase. The reality is, in America, we do have a hidden, invisible shadow government, if you will. We have a...

Yeah, I mean, it's in the shadows. We all know this to be true, even though none of us can prove it. But we've said it a lot. I heard QAnon mention it once. Oh, yeah. I mean, it's in the shadows. Of course, it's hidden. We all know this to be true, even though none of us can prove it, but we've said it a lot. I heard QAnon mention it once. Oh, my God. So we're good. Invisible power structure

that some people call the deep state, and we go into the history of the deep state in Trumpocalypse. There we go, buddy. I love the title. The title of that book

is absolutely perfect for this. It's so delightfully ironic. Absolutely perfect for this administration. This almost sounds like something between a science fiction novel and Stephen King or whatever. Yeah, it's a horror story, isn't it? It's a horror story, but the most horrible thing. I've been that way since fucking November of 16. So, yeah.

What fucking Lovecraftian door did we open? What the fuck did we do? As you know, it's true. Right. And there's a trail of verifiable, impeccable evidence that proves it's true. I'm not going to tell you what that is. They're not going to bother to talk with you. All right.

There's a lot of evidence, and it's perfect. The evidence is amazing. It's verifiable. There's a lot of evidence and it's perfect. The evidence is amazing. Verifiable. It's so good. You'll get tired of how good this evidence is. Pardon me while I don't verify any of it. Now, it's probably in the extensively footnoted tome Trumpocalypse. This then lets you continue.

What's been interesting, and we'll talk more about the whole issue of how did they come about those memos? Was it hacking of the Russians that caused those memos to get to Julian Assange and so forth? But the point is that that issue, the issue of how it happened, how it was hacked, has become the focal point. What was said in the memorandum has never been denied. Correct. Oh, yeah. There's been, there's been,

it's not been denied. It's just been like, they've been like, yeah, that's not, nobody cares about that. You just read the memorandum. And what they're going to get into is all the stuff that came out with the Podesta emails.

And we looked through those. It's all made up. Like, it makes me crazy. We searched for all the different, you know, like, when Alex Jones, all those fake key terms. Alex Jones was like, oh, they're just, there's tons of key terms in here, guys. They're just talking consistently about hot dogs. So I got all

these hot dogs. I'm going to sell all these hot dogs. I need more hot dogs. Send me your hot dogs. I need hot dogs for ketchup. Do you got any ketchup on those hot dogs? I'd really enjoy some ketchup on hot dogs. I like deep throating my hot dog. And I looked through and there's two mentions of hot dogs and it says something to the effect of, yeah, we need hot dogs because staffers eat hot dogs. And then the other one said, we need we're going to have to bring that hot dog cart that you had mentioned. It was for an event like where people are going to show up and eat food and hot dogs. And they're not made out of they're not little sausages made out of kids. They're fucking hot dogs. Now, I'm not saying what's in them is better than what made out of kids. They're fucking hot dogs.

Now, I'm not saying what's in them is better than what's in little kids. It slips in assholes. That's true. I mean, I'm not saying it's better, but they're just hot dogs. Yeah. Just a hot dog. Chicago style or New York? I don't know.

Is there a New York style hot dog? There is. I didn't know this, but there's a New York style of hot dog, and they use like a hot tomato sauce relish. Tomato, no. That doesn't sound good at all in there. No tomato on hotish. Tomato, no. That doesn't sound good at all in there. No tomato on hot dogs. We do not. That doesn't sound good at all.

No? No, I'm not a tomato fan on hot dogs. I would try one. I don't know. Do you like the Chicago-style dog with all the shenanigans on it? I don't get it with all the shenanigans. You're a purist.

I'm a purist. I get it with just mustard. I'm a purist. I get it with the whole celery salt and the sport peppers. I like that. First off, the hot dog is not made to have shit on top of it. It's a fucking

thing that the moment you put it near your mouth, that shit explodes like a fucking landmine. It does fall off. There's no way to keep that on there or put that and have it stay on there. You have to like, just to even get it to your mouth with all that garbage on there, you've got to like have a fucking like a steady cam to put it in your mouth.

You're not wrong. It's impossible. I know. And it always just falls off anyway. When I was a kid, it was mustard and onions and now it's just mustard. You've even gotten rid of the onion. Yeah. I'm like, no onion. I'm just like, let's just do, wow. Let's be a purist. I do crack cracked pepper on it though. So I'll do cracked pepper with mustard on a hot dog. Very often though, my hot dogs, if I am going to make them, if I don't put them on a fire, which is I think how a hot dog should be eaten

is on a fire, like on a grill. I think that's probably the best way to have a hot dog. But the other way is to boil them in celery salt brine. Oh, okay. All right. So you like the celery salt flavor. Yeah. The celery salt gets in there, but it's in a celery salt brine that they

get boiled in and then I take them out and then I put it on the... So there's a couple of... I've got some options. I take some options and do some things there that are similar to what a Chicago-style dog might create. And it gets into... In fact, I'll have you comment even further about spirit cooking.

Right. Oh, God. Oh, here we go. They haven't let this go because these guys just want to eat cum. These guys can't stop talking about it. They really can't stop talking about this because it weirds them out.

Yeah. It is weird. I'm not going to say that the things that they talked about and the things that we researched on it, it's not that it's not weird. It's weird. But they never mentioned spirit cooking. Right.

I think they might mention it once as like a joke. In the Podesta emails? Yeah, in the Podesta emails. And the other time they're mentioning it, it's because the woman who did a lot of it was involved in something that they were doing. It's just a weird, hyper... It's like an artist thing.

Yeah, right. This is not like a practice, is what I mean. It's just... Well, and in order to think that this is a thing, I think your mystical worldview has to allow

that coming in cream of broccoli soup and eating it gives you powers. Yeah, well, it certainly does, right? It has to have something in there. Yeah, it's that crazy voodoo idea that it's like a little eye of newton likes a hair from your head and now i've made a love potion yeah and if i if i put if i bleed into this thing and if i ejaculate into it

i will get power it's like but why not just fucking eat your own cum and suck on a fucking boo-boo like i don't understand like like why is it gotta beed? Like, why do I have to put it on my fucking Chicago style hot dog? Well, that's good, right? Marina Abramovic and the elites and the Hollywood people that have gotten into this whole occult thing. Right. And that this is really at the forefront, at least for those of us that are studying these things. Right. You have studied it.

Get the fuck out of here. I read you go to fucking spirit cooking school. It's not studying when you browse around on the internet. You're not studying. Don't fucking use that. I did some research. You fucking browsed around on the internet. You tapped around on Google.

Are you kidding me? You didn't go to La Corte on blood. Beware of it. It's not something the mainstream media course will talk about at all. No. And that's why. It's because they fucking dismiss it out of hand like everyone else that has looked at those emails. Those emails have been up

forever. They're fucking available right now. You can go look through every single one of those goddamn emails. There's nothing in there. It's fucking banal, boring, useless information about two people chit-chatting the only useful shit in there is the dnc stuff when they tried to fuck bernie

yeah well yeah that's interesting it's it's like when they released the um the jfk stuff right and it's like oh it's gonna and then everyone right it's like no there's nothing there nobody nobody have you heard? Fucking, oh, my God, JFK, guys. No. I haven't heard. Fuck off. No.

They released it, and they're just like, yeah, there's nothing. Guys, it turns out nothing. Nothing. Why they are fake news, because they're not talking about perhaps the single most important story in America right now and for the last 30 years. And that is simply this. They're at the very highest levels of government, culture, entertainment, media, politics, both in the United States and Europe. They currently exist and has existed for at least 30 or 40 years

at a very high level. And a largely hidden network of practicing pedophiles. Then how'd you find them if they're largely hidden? What are they? Once in a while, pull back a cloak and show you a kid, right? This is a secret cabal that is not a secret because I'm watching it on fucking YouTube right now. This isn't how secret organizations work. Either we know about them and we have evidence and we've proved it because we've broken open their fucking secret society and we've got all this proof. Right. Or you don't fucking know about it. Yeah.

This is like the worst kept secret. Like fucking Liz Kitchen Croken knows about this. Everybody knows about it. Right. It's like the best. It's like the least kept secret that no one can prove. Because some guy on fucking 4chan is telling these people.

Because a lot of human beings on the planet happen to have a high fucking 1080p camera in their fucking pocket that they carry around with them and nobody has produced any fucking video, not a single bit of fucking Angela Merkel fucking mouth

raping someone. Right. Right? It's never happened. Never, not a moment has there ever been a world leader in a pedophile-like fucking-esque situation that we've captured even on fucking photographs. There's literally no evidence. These fucking grown-ass men and women are getting

trolled by probably some fucking 16-year-old kid sitting in front of his fucking Chromebook. This is true. This is not, you know, a tabloid. I can confirm it with my own study, and I've written about it in some of my books as well. Good. I can confirm it with the things I've read and that I subsequently wrote about.

And then I wrote, yeah. But not like a verified source. Not like a photo. Right. Or this piece of evidence. Or a person. Right. Like a human being who's been in that room who can like then verify it in some way. That's independently verified. None of that. It's amazing how many of these

guys verify this information in the book that they're selling. Right. Yeah. Exactly. That's totally true. I just find that to be an amazing coincidence. What a coincidence, guys. It's in my new book, Trumpaka Poop or whatever. Poopa Poop. new book trumpaka poop or whatever drunk a poop a corn or whatever so there's a network of pedophiles but it's worse than that yes because pedophilia not all the time but when you what are we talking about here? Oh, this is going to get weird, man. This is about to take a turn.

It's going to get worse. What? Not all the time. It's about. Okay. Not all the time. You don't give them a party hat all the time. Oh, my God.

It's like the dentist. Okay. When you're done, you can take a toy from the bucket. Here, you got to get a sucker, but you got to reach in my pants. You see high level officials involved in pedophilia, it's usually a clue of satanic worship and participation in Satanism.

But sometimes it's just a hobby. Sometimes they're just go-getters. I'd really rather not talk about this, but I would be failing as an american citizen and as a christian we are to shine light into the dark acts of men and as a christian i would be failing you if i didn't tell you this but there are as we said high level people who belong to a oh you're just repeating shit now yeah Satanic network. They're satanic practicing Satanists.

They're satanic networks. They're satanics practicing Satanists. I just want you to know. I just want to emphasize the Satan part. Did you hear the part where they're Satanists? Did I make that clear about what they love about Satan? Fucking name dropper.

They're into, and I'm sorry to say this i have no you know this i i don't even want to talk about this but we explain it in trumpocalypse but here's the thing i didn't want to talk about it but i did write about it extensively for only 14.99 you can read about it available on amazon they abuse children emotionally, psychologically, and very brutally, sadistically, including murder in their sexual rape and torture and mutilation of these young children. And it's a global phenomenon. Oh my gosh. Show me one shred of evidence. Show me an evidence. Is this just going to go on forever now? Just what I don't understand, Tom, is that there's just never been a fucking single moment

where somebody comes in like, holy shit, I found this kid arm. I know, right? And it looks like somebody fucked it. Where all these missing kids come from? Plus, like, most people just aren't pedophiles. Yeah. Just that's how most people.

Yeah. It's not like people are holding back. I would if I could, but you know. But when we read that David Icke book, he talked about how the aliens, he used aliens, but they would use Satanists. These people go out of their way. They suck the emotional fucking vigor out of the child or whatever.

And so they're fucking ruining the kids all the time. So that's what the mentors. It's ridiculous. This guy is just trying to sell you a book. But man, I love how they'll just turn on a dime and tell you how much proof they have that they never show you. I know. I have so much proof. I once talked to a guy who talked to a guy who knew a guy that once worked at a company.

Check the footnotes. They refer to me. Right. They refer to my other book. That's what happened at Ike's book. I know. He's like, you know, you would have known this if you'd read some of my other tomes. You might know me from. You might know me from.

You might know me from such books as the other book I recently wrote. All right. So next week. Yes. We're going to actually have email. We are. And we're actually going to have us in studio talking. We've been off for a very long time.

We recorded this before I went on vacation. I'll be returning from vacation this week and we'll be in studio talking. We've been off for a very long time. We recorded this before I went on vacation. I'll be returning from vacation this week and we'll be in studio actually recording. And we recorded a lot. Oh my gosh, today was just super long.

Holy cow. But we had a great day today and we recorded a lot of stuff, but I'm sure we're going to be very excited to get back in the studio and get into the swing of things. If we hadn't mentioned

your Patreon in a while, it's because we are not in the studio. And we will do it all next week, the nice big long lineage next week. But that's going to wrap it up for this week. We're going to leave you like we always do with the Skeptic's Creed. Credulity is not a virtue. It's fortune cookie cutter, mommy issue, hypno-Babylon bullshit. Couched in scientician, double bubble, toil and trouble, pseudo-quasi-alternative, acupunctuating, pressurized, stereogram, pyramidal, free energy, healing, water, downward spiral, brain dead, pan, sales pitch, late night info-docutainment. Leo Pisces, cancer cures, Detox. Reflex. Foot massage.

Death in towers. Tarot cards. Psychic healing. Crystal balls. Bigfoot. Yeti. Aliens. Churches.

Mosques and synagogues. Temples. Dragons. Giant worms. Atlantis. Dolphins. Truthers. Birthers.

Witches. Wizards. Vaccine nuts. Shaman healers. Evangelists. Conspiracy. Double speak. Stigmata, nonsense.

Expose your sides. Thrust your hands. Bloody, evidential, conclusive. Doubt even this. The opinions and information provided on this podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. All opinions are solely that of Glory Hole Studios, LLC. Cognitive dissonance makes no representations as to accuracy, completeness, currentness, suitability, or validity of any information and will not be liable for any errors, damages, or butthurt arising from consumption. All information is provided on an as-is basis. No refunds.

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