Cognitive Dissonance - Episode 432: TransAtlantic Pipeline

Episode Date: September 6, 2018

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This episode of Cognitive Dissonance is brought to you by our patrons. You fucking rock. Be advised that this show is not for children, the faint of heart, or the easily offended. The explicit tag is there for a reason. recording live from glur hill studios in Chicago. This is Cognitive Dissonance. Every episode we blast anyone who gets in our way. We bring critical thinking, skepticism, and irreverence to any topic that makes the news, makes it big, or makes us mad. It's skeptical, it's political, and there is no welcome at. This is episode 431 of Cognitive Dissonance.

This will be a midweek episode. It's something that we don't do very often, but we had a lot of material left over from a record that we did. So we wanted to put something together for midweek here. A little bonus, a little fluff for you. A little extra for you. So we hope you enjoy it. So we want to talk about this story next.

This is actually a YouTube clip from InfoWars. You can find InfoWars pretty much at InfoWars. Although this clip is on YouTube. This clip is on YouTube, but it's a clip from... Right. It's a clip somebody else excerpted from InfoWars. It's not the InfoWars channel. So what happened was, is that Alex Jones took a...

Somehow there was a video feed of his phone. His phone came into view while he was on the air. And while he's on the air, it just so happened that there was a tab open on a browser that said something about a T-Babe Marissa doing something. I saw it. It was very short.

Yeah, like, cock, slut, he's hungry for dick. Something like that. Some nonsense. You know, it's something that's going to catch your eye while you're scrolling, really. It's like, huh. Yeah. Well, alright. It's convenient that I happen to be a cock chef. I will feed this young

lady. Like, oh, she's hungry for dick. All right. It's convenient that I happen to be a cock chef. I will feed this young lady. She's hungry for dick. That happens to be what I have warmed up for supper. I seem to have the salami. But anyway, this stupid thing comes up on his phone. This tab, browsing tab, comes up on his phone that clearly shows trans porn, right? The title.

Because somebody searched for the title and found this title turns out when you use the word T-Babe, there's specific... That means something. Maybe he meant to type in T-Bird. T-Bird. Like the old car. Hey, man! And he's like, whoa, I auto-filled.

That's what he used to drive around to get all the ladies in high school. The T-Birds. The satanic ladies or whatever. All those satanic ladies were like, I love a good T-Bird. Satanic bitches love T-Birds.

Do the T-Tops come out? Let me see your grand T-Tops. He's got a Trans Am. Oh, gosh. It would be great if everything he had was like a trans something. He's still transphobic.

Like he drives a Trans Am. Like somehow he collects Transformers. He likes the Transatlantic Pipeline. Yeah, he does. He sure does. He looked it up on his phone, it turns out. No, but the reason why this is funny is because he's the guy who thinks the frogs are turning gay. Right.

Because they're drinking. And he's also one of these guys who's like, there's only two sexes. And sex is equal to gender. And yeah, he's very anti-trans. Right. Right. And so he has been sort of people have been like, what the fuck was going on there, bro? Because it's basically what happens with all the fucking.

Yeah. It's like a gay pastor is like, oh, those gays oiling up their hot man packs. was going on there, bro. Because it's basically what happens with all the fucking priests and whatever. All those gays oiling up their hot man pecks and putting each other's hard, erect dicks in each other's mouths, the dirty, hot sinners. And you're just like, you're so gay!

You're gayer than the two dudes who hang out in the garage across the street from me. It's so gay. There are two dudes, by out in the garage across the street from me it's so gay that's so there are two dudes by the way yeah every single night and i don't mean most nights every single night these my neighbors they're just hanging out in the garage the other day they're hanging out when he's got his shirt off every that spend like five six hours a day just hanging out in the garage not working on something they're just two dudes and I drive home like

just kiss just kiss just kiss I'm reminded of the scene from American Beauty right yeah I told him like if you hear a gunshot and see somebody like covered in water looking like real confused that's the neighbor that's like and it's like If you hear a gunshot and see somebody covered in water looking real confused,

that's the neighbor. It's like, it's fine. It's like, it's fine. Just leave your wives and be gay. Your wives don't care. They let you spend six hours a day together. They know. Everybody knows. It's the same thing with Alex Jones.

Alex Jones has got this thing, clearly. So he has this thing on his clearly. And so he has this thing on his phone. It's shown on there. A bunch of people were like, hey, man, what's the deal? And someone actually asked him about it on his show. So let's play the clip from Infowars. I gotta tell you, though, it's neck and neck, so if people don't get upset about this, they can win.

Yeah. And also, what about the trans porn on your phone, Alex, or you were going to talk about that? Say that again? Give me a minute to think about what to say trans porn on your phone, Alex, or you were going to talk about that? Say that again? Give me a minute to think about what to say. Hold on. I did hear your clearly worded question with no intervention.

One more time while I pause and consider how to answer that question. And what's funny is after he plays this, he immediately knows what she's talking about. Hang on a minute. I'm looking at trans porn. It's not like you don't know, Alex. Trans porn on your phone? That's all they's talking about. I'm looking at Transporn. It's not like you don't know, Alex. Transporn on your phone? That's all they keep talking about.

No. You know, I saw a couple news articles about that. It's ridiculous. He saw your phone! It was on your phone! You would have to... Even if his fucking bullshit story is going to tell in a second, it's like, you had to close that browser tab! It would be funny if... You'd see close that browser tab. It'd be funny.

Oh, I had to see that on the news. You had to see it on your phone. It'd be funny if like once he saw that on the news, it reminded of his wank material and he wanked it again. No, I actually, about two minutes in, it's pretty hot. I was digging that T-Band. Some reporter we're trying to hire today and punched in some number

and it popped up porn on my phone. Everybody's. Wait, you punched in some number and it popped up porn on my phone. Everybody's. Wait, you punched in a number and it popped up porn on your phone. What number is that? Who do I have to text? Who's looking something up? Hey, I'm going to hire somebody. Let me just punch numbers randomly into my Internet browser.

Four, three, nine, six. Oh, it looks like I should hire Cecil. What the fuck? What are you talking about? 8172. Why does that young lady have a cock in her mouth? That's weird. All I did was type in numbers. Anyway, I'll just

leave that open. Yeah, anyway, I would just immediately close it. His explanation here is fucking amazing it's so funny too cause like when I browse reddit once in a while cause like images will just open and once in a while

they'll just be like some broad like spread eagle and it'll be like a gone wild or something cause it got upvoted to the front page and it'll just be like oh jesus I scroll past it. I'll say, because if Sarah's in there, I don't want to think I'm like, I'm not looking at porn while you're in the room.

I'll wait until you leave. I'll wait until you leave. No, I wait until she's doing the dishes. Had porn pop up on her phone hundreds of times. I'm sitting with a phone. Hundreds of times. I have never had porn pop up on my phone, although I'm willing to try. I'm sitting here with a phone. Hundreds of times. I have never had porn pop up on my phone, although I'm willing to try. I will tell you that

all of the porn that has popped up on my phone is because I went to Pornhub.com to get the porn on my phone. I went to a porn site. Right. I was never like, I was at Peapod and I typed in Pornhub. What? You remember that stupid fucking movie we watched

where the guy was clicking on the pop-ups fireproof or whatever it's called. He threw his computer monitor in the garbage. He threw his computer away because he couldn't stop wanking it. Do you remember that movie? I do. This is Alex Jones. He's like accidentally, he's like, oh, there I was on my boat site and there was like

a porn thing and I couldn't help myself. I just, I wanted to rent an apartment so I went to penthouse.com What the fuck? Hundreds of times this has happened to him? Hundreds of times. I was looking for advice on my pet gerbil so I went to

XHamster. I don't know. What? I got a pet gerbil. He's got a big X on his back. What do you want from me? And then I stayed there and did not close the browser. I was looking up,

you know, how to discipline your child. I went to spankit.com. What do you want from me? Showing it to everybody because I couldn't get a URL up in the studio and then like some... Why? Why would you not be able to? because I couldn't get a URL up in the studio and then like some... Why? Why would you not be able to?

Because I didn't... It would have been amazing if he... You know how you can cast a device on your phone? Could you imagine if he cast to the thing? Behind him? Yeah, that would have been awesome. I just don't understand. If he's looking at porn, why can't he get it up? That's what the porn is for.

That's... These things seem incongruous. for that's the thing pops up like oh my god and i looked at it wasn't the news blurted out because there was nothing there they blurred it to then say something was there what what does that mean the news i looked at it and i said oh my god but then also there was nothing there and then the news blurred it to say something i think he's saying that there was nothing in the header and then the news blurred it to say something. I think he's saying that there was nothing in the header. And then the news blurred it and made it look like it was trans porn. But it wasn't. It was totally regular porn. Well, they'd only blurred the picture.

But I think I know I I'm right there with you, Cecil. This is a nonsensical. This is an explanation. This is the guy, your kid, like real fast. I come in, like put the laundry away and you hear like whoo! The computer shuts real quick and he's got like a towel

over him and he's just like I was just I gotta go! He's just sitting there he's like I was folding laundry. I started and finished with this towel. And then I finished on this towel. And then I finished

on this towel. Also, this towel is not clean. This towel has a stain on it. I need to wash it again. We are going to need a lot of new towels. I had to wash all my crusty socks. You got to pull the googly eyes

off of all of them. In unrelated news, we are out of lotion and Kleenex. And I don't know why, but the internet's down. I went to some porn menu. I probably had porn menus pop up 500 times on my phone. What? That doesn't happen. Is that a setting?

Because I want it. Porn menus? Porn menus. Porn menus. Like, oh, let me see what I'm ordering today. All the pot stickers. It all looks like carpaccio i'll tell you just sausage and roast beef i don't know i don't know what i want but i definitely

want the tacos i definitely want the tacos i appreciate your call i mean it's insane ladies and gentlemen there's two types of people people that look at porn and people that lie about it. But I wasn't looking at porn. I'm one of the ones lying about it. I'm identifying that I am one of the ones lying about it. That's amazing. Oh my God. That is amazing. Because I agree with him.

Yeah. Everybody has looked at porn. Everybody. All of you, all of you right now are probably looking at porn. And if you want to look at porn, you can. You can go to adamandeve.com. You can type in glory at checkout.

You'll get 50% off almost any item of free sex swing and free shipping. But they sell porn there. So if you didn't want to go to the internet to get it, you could go to the internet and then get it shipped to you. Well, I like, I like, you know what I like about buying porn in 2018 is like, there's like, there's a world where you're like, what if the internet goes down? I need to be prepared for all eventualities.

It's like, I'm going to take two of those fucking food buckets. Yeah. I was going to say. And I want a fucking DVD rack of like anal babysitter nine. Absolutely. I will tell you right now, you know, I want an entire food bucket filled with DVDs. Like you're running your generator just to run your DVD player.

It's just once a day. I'm almost out of electricity. Just so you could run it one more time. After all the electricity goes out, you're just holding it up to the sun, hoping like it's like Cinemax when you were a kid. You can maybe see a boobie on it. On my phone. I don't take phones on air that I look at porn on. I have separate phones.

You have another phone? I use sex phone for my porn. I have a separate phone and I dubbed it sex phone. And this is the phone I fuck with. Here's what I do. I don't look at it on a phone. Look at it on a computer. That's not what I do.

Well, I have a whole slew of phones. Just like several phones. He's the only guy who fucking unitasks with a smartphone. I want to download that app. I better buy a new phone for it. Yeah. And so I saw all that. I didn't respond to it.

I mean, if I respond to half the attacks on me, it'll be ridiculous. But I'll say this. The Amazon ads, the Viagra ads, the weird non-plastic bag ads are taking my iPhone over. iPhones didn't used to be that bad like Androids. He is just babbling. Yeah, at the end,

he's just going, like, he's doing what he can to try to deflect in any way possible. But this is the kind of guy, though, that would be embarrassed that, you know, like, this sort of thing happened. The only reason to be embarrassed is because it's a hypocritical stance to take. Exactly.

It is like we were joking earlier. It's the gay pastor. It's the guy who got caught with the trans person who was paying the hooker or whatever. In the airport or whatever. No, I'm talking about the guy who was like the megachurch dude who was hiring. I thought that was an airport. Didn't he pick up a trans person at an airport and do a bunch of meth or something? Am I mixing?

Maybe there's a bunch of different ones. But he was picking up like every week, like he had a trans prostitute that he would... Oh, I didn't know. Yeah. It was the guy from the Jesus Camp movie who's like, we know what you did this weekend. It's that guy, whatever his name is. Who's the guy that got the rent boy? Ted Haggard, was that his name?

Yeah, yeah. Who's the guy who did the shoe tappy tappa in the airport? That was a Republican congressman or something. Who's the guy that got the shoe tappy tapper in the airport? That was a Republican congressman or something. Who's the guy that got the rent boy and traveled with the Republican congressman? I get all these guys mixed up. I always thought that it would have been priests, but it's not. It's congressmen too. They don't need to rent them.

They get them free from their parents who send them to church. It's free. They're rent to own. I've just sucked one year of your life away. What did this do to you? Tell me. And remember, this is for posterity, so be honest. How do you feel?

So the story is from commondreams.org. The prison strike is an overdue opportunity to end the slavery of incarcerated people. So there is a national prison strike going on, and that's supposed to be going on until September the 9th. And there's 10 demands that the prisoners have. And I think it would be good for us to go through those demands a little bit and have a conversation about what those demands are. So that moves us over to the incarceratedworkers.org site.

And I will say, like, incarcerated workers is an interesting way to think about and rename prisoners. number of people who are laboring for free or essentially for free, primarily in the for-profit prison system in the United States. And, you know, I don't think that there's a reasonable argument that can be made that suggests that that is not free forced labor. Yeah, slave labor, right? Essentially, yeah. You know, like, I know that there is a, I know that one of the counterpoints is they're just paying their way. They owe a debt to society and they are paying that debt to society. Society incurs costs to

incarcerate these people for their misdeeds and their labor is part of how they repay that cost. So in fairness to that point, I am going to say it out loud. Sure. I do think it's a bullshit point, though. I think that that's a bullshit point. I think when you round people up for the kinds of shit we round people up for, and this might be a point where you and I have some disagreement, but we round people up for shit we should not round people up for. We throw people in jail and throw them away for non-violent bullshit fake crimes. Like, you know, the whole drug war

and the possession of drugs and distribution of drugs. There's no violence attached to it. Like, prison time is egregious and uncalled for. And I think you and I do agree. Yeah, we definitely do. I do think, you know, maybe if you're a violent offender, there may be cause to say, look, look, you owe us something.

Sure. I don't disagree with that. I don't disagree with that. I think that, you know, those people will be spending some time in prison because they're like, I think that prison can be both punitive and rehabilitative. Right. So there's two things. But I don't think that those two things are automatically at odds. Yeah. Right? So there's two things. But I don't think that those two things are automatically at odds.

Right. I think that, you know, there is a level of punitive measure you have to take when somebody, you know, hurts somebody else. Right.

I think that, you know, it's very easy for many of us to wave our hand at someone who had, you know, this,

you know, this, this, this bad thing happened in their life and then just say, well, they, they deserve it. Right.

You know, we don't say that when they're rich and perfect example of that is drunk driving. Right. Look at how many people have been hurt, injured by rich people when they drunk drive. And then they get off pretty much scot-free, right? Or when they drunk drive and when a poor person drunk drives, they could go to jail.

They could lose their car, all this other stuff. You can just pay to get out of that. Now, that's a very dangerous thing to do is drunk drive. It's very dangerous. It hurts many people each year. Many people each year die. I don't know what the statistics are, but many people die from that every year. But you can just pay it off if you're rich.

You won't go to jail if you're rich. Well, think about drugs too. If everybody listening to this that had drugs in their possession at some point had gotten caught in that moment, you'd have a drug possession charge. I don't know. In some states, those are that had drugs in their possession at some point had gotten caught in that moment. You'd have a drug possession charge.

I don't know. In some states, those are felonies. Some felonies are only triggered by certain amounts. Some felonies are triggered by the kind of drug you had in possession. So like I know in some states, having one tab of ecstasy is a felony. Just having it in your hand, it's a felony, right? So what's the difference between you who didn't get caught and that guy who did get caught? Well, the difference is you didn't get caught.

And that's like, when you look at the percentage of people in America who have tried this drug or that drug, it's most of us. At some point, if we had gotten caught at the wrong moment doing something, most of us would have at the very least a misdemeanor, if not a felony. Because drug crimes in many states, not all, but in many states,

possession of certain types of drugs are a felony no matter the amount. Again, that's not in every state. So pause and think about that for a second. Are we all deserving of the same kind of mistreatment that every felon who goes to, no, most of this is a matter of, were you poor? Yeah. Or did you have bad luck? Or were you black? I mean, racial sentencing. I said poor. Yeah. Racial sentencing is a thing, man. It is a thing. And also racial profiling is a thing too. They, you know, like that's a thing that happens, right? We talked to police officers that have said, yeah, that's what you do.

Like, yeah, you're going to be able to find, you know, some rich suburban white girl will probably have just as much ecstasy on her, but you're not going to stop her car. Right. You're going to stop a different car. And if you do, you know, someone's going to pay for a good attorney. Yeah.

And it's all going to be, it's going to get pled down. There's a very different, there's a very different car. And if you do, you know, someone's going to pay for a good attorney. Yeah. And it's all going to, it's going to get pled down. There's a very different, there's a very different thing. But, but I, I do agree that there is that, you know, like for some crimes, certain crimes, there's, there's something to be said about like, yeah, we've got to punish this person. I understand that. But I think that the, the system we have in this country is punish first. And I think it's rare to do the rehabilitative. I think that's a rare thing in prisons. I think that we should be instead saying, let's rehabilitate as many of these people as we can to make them stop being criminals. Because there's definitely something there when you look at other countries and how well they're doing. And how well they're

doing, like how well their prison, you and I had a conversation maybe two or three months ago, it never made the air, but we were talking about recidivism rates. I looked up recidivism rates in like, in like Scandinavia

and they are fucking shockingly low in comparison to what we have. Right. Like they're even the recidivism rates for rape, for rape and pedophilia. I mean like stuff in the,

in the States that you go to jail for and you just do over and over and over and over and over again. The moment they let you out, you just run out and rape another person. And then they stuff you back in jail over there. It's a 12%. Right. And it's like the, it's a huge difference in the two things. And we just, but we don't want to try that. We don't want to do that because, because we have a mindset over here, the fucking root and toot and cowboy mindset that we want to hurt these people. These people hurt

other people. And don't get me wrong, I understand it. It's not that I don't understand being angry at someone who hurts you. It's not that I don't understand that. I just think it's bad policy. Yeah, I feel very strongly like prison should be a thing that we reserve for the worst crimes. Yeah. And rehabilitation

and some other set of because there's a lot of ways to be punitive, too. You know, like, yeah, like you fucking you rape a kid like I don't care. Like you go to jail and that's where you're at now. Right. That's just like for me, like there are some lines you can't cross. But like, yeah, you robbed a liquor store or something that's different. Right. And there's there are there are circumstances where that may or may not be uh i don't want to say understandable but you can but you can come back from that you can re-enter society and maybe even steal something from somebody you know like there are crimes

robber lickers is probably the wrong example because it's generally violent how else you're going to rob it if there's not violence attached to it but you know like there are a lot of things that we put people in jail for that um those people are not posing a danger to society. Right. So we got to stop doing that. We got to like otherwise all we're doing is feeding a system. And then it's clear that that's what we're doing. And the problem is, is that the system then spits them out more violent than they were before.

Yeah. And we've we're making society worse. Right. spits them out more violent than they were before. Yeah, and we're making society worse, right? If you look at the overall net effect, we are not creating a better society by doing this. We are actively creating a worse society by doing this. So let's look at their demands. Immediate improvements to the conditions of prisons and prison policies that recognize

the humanity of imprisoned men and women. Two, an immediate end to prison slavery. All persons in prison in any place of detention under United States jurisdiction must be paid the prevailing wage in their state or territory for their labor. That'll never happen. That'll never happen.

And I don't know that I necessarily agree with the prevailing wage. You know, like if you've got somebody learning a craft, do I think I want to pay somebody learning to weld in prison $75 an hour because that's what they get in the union? No, I don't know that that's necessarily.

But I don't want to pay them $0.24 an hour. I don't want to pay them a tiny amount either. Right. So if they have no choice but to do that work, then we need to think about how to compensate somebody for work in a way that is fair, but also recognizes the circumstances that drove them to this situation. Sure. Right. Like maybe they have to pay back the cost of the instruction, et cetera. You know, I don't know. But I understand what you're saying. Yeah, exactly. Be thoughtful about it instead of just saying, yeah, you're going to get a couple pennies on the dollar. You're going to you're going to actually make couple pennies on the dollar, you're going to actually make real

dollars. And that could change. Imagine the difference between getting paid 20 cents as a prisoner and learning, let's say you learned a trade, like how to change oil in a car or whatever it is. You learn some sort of trade. As time goes on, you're getting better and better at that. So there's some benefit of you when you leave. There's some benefit. But imagine if you also left with a small nest egg of money that you could then start your reenter society with right now, you've got enough for your first month's rent and your security deposit and maybe a small car, depending on how long you're in jail. Right now, you have an ability to get to work. You have an ability to, to be, uh, you know, somebody who in society is not going to be,

you know, maybe looking at the stuff that got you into jail and being like, well, that was kind of, I might be able to get by doing something like that instead. Do you know what I mean? Like, like there's a benefit to that. Like, and it's, and you're still getting the labor and you're still profiting off of it. And you get, just get to share a little bit of that profit with somebody. That's it. But the difference is, is that we have this, you know, those people that are, are negotiating those deals with those companies that want to, you know, you come in and you weld the washer for whatever company it is, whatever major brand it is. You, you weld that, or you've put that thing together. They're negotiating that stuff to make it the smallest dollar amount they could possibly imagine

so that they get the money. It's outsourcing in-house. Yeah. In the big house. Yeah, yeah. In the big house. The Prison Litigation Reform Act must be rescinded,

allowing imprisoned humans a proper channel to address grievances and violations of their rights. I don't, I mean, I don't know what that is, the Reform Act, but Jesus, I mean,

you know, look, there should be proper channels to address grievances and violations of people's rights. I mean, what the fuck? If that seems like a no-brainer, although I don't know enough about the litigation. Yeah, I know, but seriously. The Truth in Sentencing Act and the Sentencing Reform Act must be rescinded so that imprisoned humans have a possibility of rehabilitation and parole. No human shall be sentenced to death by incarceration or serve any sentence without the possibility of parole. I do not agree with that. I think I do.

I know we made this. I do think that there are things you can do that you don't get to reenter society. Like there are there are rules you can break, which means you are always dangerous now. Like there like I just. You know, there are a handful of people Like there, like I, I just, you know, there, there are a handful of people out there that we know just sure, but it's also hard to,

yeah, but it's also hard to legislate against the handful of people. And the problem is, is when you start saying no parole for one thing, like we had a conversation that about Gacy. Right. And you said, I don't think Gacy,

I agree, but I think Gacy is an easy answer because they found the fucking bodies in his basement. It's not like he's like, whoopsie, didn't do it. That wasn't me. That was Bill. You know what I mean? Like they fucking found. So it's easy to say him, but where do we put that line?

Like, where do we draw that line? And I don't have that answer. I just know that I don't like the- The problem is his creep though. The problem is his creep. It's where they start to creep it down and say, yeah, but we're still afraid, so why don't we add in this crime

too? Or why don't we add in this other thing too? And when you have it as a... I'm not saying that we shouldn't have it. I'm just saying we've got to be careful with it, right? I agree with you. I think the death penalty is a perfect example of something I would not agree to. I'm anti-death penalty. 100% against, right?

But, you know, possibility without parole, at least the person's alive in case there was a mistake in the trial. You know, those sorts of things. So I'm okay. But at a certain point, like, we need to stop handing out. I think it's good to be judicious with life without parole.

I think that that's something you need to look at and say, yeah, that guy, but not those other six. Yeah. You know what I mean? I think this bullshit where it's like, I committed three crimes, it's life. Yeah. That's fucking evil, right?

But I do think that there are evil crimes, right? Absolutely. I think that there are evil crimes. But I also think that, you know, there's another thing too that we got to think about is how much of your life is judged on that one moment, right? It's only one moment of your life. And, you know, I've been really angry before in my life.

What happens if I, you know, hurt somebody? You know, like, I'll give you an example from the Netherlands that I do find disturbing in the other direction. So that Breivik guy, right? He will get out of jail in my life. Yeah. So that guy shot how many people? Dozens.

72. Yeah. So I think there's nothing, there's no words that will ever convince me that that guy should ever, no door should ever open through which he walks. Of course. Right. Yeah.

But he will. Yeah. He will because his, where he's, where he's from, where he was sentenced, the maximum sentence is I, 25 years or something. And they don't stack sentences the way that we do.

Yeah. So he didn't get like 72 25-year sentences, right? Served, you know, sequentially or whatever. So I find that troubles. Absolutely. So I get it. And I just want to acknowledge that. Yeah, there's some cognitive dissonance.

I acknowledge that that is troublesome. I recognize that, too. And I just, so I just want to acknowledge that. Yeah, there's some cognitive dissonance. I acknowledge that that is troublesome. I recognize, I recognize that too. And I, and I agree. But I also feel like, you know, there's a moment, you know, that there's going to be some 19 year old who gets put away for life for one moment. Yeah. I don't even think 19, I mean, I think at 19, you are still forming and that we agree. Like, I think that the society agrees with me.

Right. There's a reason why we don't let 19 year olds drink in most states because of anything at 19 you are still forming and that we agree like i think that the society agrees with me right right there's a reason why we don't let 19 year olds drink in most states because of anything in any state in the united states because we don't think that they're fully formed yet right so somebody does something at 19 and then they're in jail for the rest of their life or how about the shit where it's like i got a 14 year old yeah and then we we try them as an adult and throw them away for it happens. That happens. That happens.

So I recognize, like, I understand, I understand the side. That's like, man, maybe we should be a little more, we should pay a little more attention to sentencing.

Yes. I'm right. We should pay more attention to it. Do I think that there are no people that deserve to live in prison forever? I don't think that I think I'm right there with you with Gacy, right? Like that guy, to be perfectly frank, I think that. I think I'm right there with you with Gacy, right? Like, that guy, to be perfectly frank,

I think that's a guy who deserved to die. Like, I recognize, like, like that, but I recognize that's terrible policy. It's bad policy. But I also think

that there's no way that guy should move next door to you. Yeah. You know what I mean? Like, he should not get out of jail. I don't care how old he is

and move next door to you. Right. No way. Yeah. So I get it. I understand. But I do think it should be one of those things

that we pay attention to more instead of just being like, here's a bulk of, you know, like anybody who's, it's weird because it's like this weird graph that at a certain point,

like you can be down here, you can be up here, you know, these two wildly different crimes, but they both yield the same result. Right, right. Yeah. Right. An immediate end to the racial over. Right, right. Yeah, right.

An immediate end to the racial overcharging, over-sentencing, and parole denials of black and brown humans. Black humans shall no longer be denied parole because the victim of the crime was white, which is a particular problem in southern states. 100%. Yeah, 100%. I mean, come on.

An immediate end to racist gang enhancement laws targeting black and brown humans. Yeah. I don't know what that means, but sure. No imprisoned humans shall be denied access to rehabilitation program at their place of their detention Laws targeting black and brown humans. Yeah. I don't know what that means, but sure. No imprisoned human shall be denied access to rehabilitation program at their place of their detention because they're labeled as a violent offender. Denied access. So I think that, again, I think this may be something that we disagree on, but I think that I think rehabilitation first. I actually think, to be honest, even if you're never getting out of prison,

like if we decide, I still think you should have some sort of rehabilitation. So I'm right there with you, right? So a rehabilitated individual who stays incarcerated for life will be easier to manage. They may be able to produce some good

within the walls of the prison, even if they can't reenter society. So like, you know, if somebody forcibly raped somebody, like, I don't think they should ever be able to walk the street again. Like that, that's my personal opinion. They never get to walk around again. Okay. But does that mean that we don't rehabilitate them and then now they can do something meaningful with their life within the walls of the prison? Like, can we get some value out of them as a society still? Well, if we can,

we should get it. But we should make sure to house that person in a place that segregates them from the real world, right? Yeah. Yeah. Because, you know, because they've they have broken a social contract in my mind in such a way that they don't get to be around us freely anymore. But that doesn't mean that like that they can't add some value to the world as long as they're kept on a leash. I'm not convinced that you can't be rehabilitated from that, but that's where I disagree with you. I think you probably can be rehabilitated.

I think that the Scandinavian countries show that you can be rehabilitated from that, that you can have a violent sex offense and still come back to society and be a productive member of society and never do that again. I think that that's a possibility. And we talked before, I was like,

I don't want to throw that person away. I don't want to just be like, I'm just going to stack you over here. You never get to do this again. Right. I understand punitive damages. I get that. But at the same time,

it's like, I don't want to throw humans away. You know, there's gotta be a reason why that person was broke enough to do that. And there's other reasons. You know what I mean? Like, like that, that person didn't just do that in a vacuum. They're not just like flipping evil gene. There's something that caused them to do that. And if it's environmental and if it's, or if it's, you know, somebody like maybe their parents or something, you know, how much of that is it? I mean, there's some of that, that's clearly their blame, but some of it isn't.

And so, you know, again, I feel like, you know, I feel like I don't want to throw that guy away. I understand that view. Yeah, yeah. I understand that view. You know, there are a handful of things for me that like you don't,

it's so easy not to do that. Like, you know. Sure, but again, it's easy. You're speaking from a place of privilege though. It's easy for you not to do that because you weren't abused horribly as a child you know what i mean like or something like that so so it is easy to do that if i may be totally speaking from a place of of of privilege in that in that respect but i you know i i do think that like there are some some parts of the social contract you don't get to break and then still be a part of everyday society.

But I also think prison probably should not be anywhere near as populated and as awful. Right. And as awful as it is. So the animal cage that it is now, that's got to change. Sure. State prisons must be funded specifically to offer more rehabilitation services. That's how we do it. Pell Grants must be reinstated in all U.S. states and territories.

I think that's just part of the rehabilitative educational process. The voting rights of all confined citizens serving prison sentences, pretrial detainees, and so-called ex-felons must be counted. Representation is demanded. All voices count. I think that that's a privilege you can lose while you're in prison. So I think that if you're a confined citizen serving a prison sentence, I don't feel like you should be able, I think you're, you're forfeiting that, right? Just like you're

forfeiting your driver's license. You know what I mean? Like at a certain point you're forfeiting your, but I recognize too with, if there were other things in place that we were talking about, fewer people in jail, those sorts of, I don't think that that's that big a deal. But I think the problem is, is that a great number of people are put behind bars, great number of African-American people disproportionately

are put behind bars, and then they're disenfranchised voting. And that's exactly it, right? Is that what this does is it systematically disenfranchises a large group of primarily people of color and people of a lower socioeconomic class.

Yeah. And so if you have a lot of these things fixed, the bottom one I don't think matters as much. I agree. 10 doesn't matter as much because there's just not as many people in prison and you're rehabilitating the people that are and they're not coming back. I think very obviously if you're a pretrial detainee, you're not guilty of anything yet. So why would you lose any right? Yeah, I'm only talking about that one. And the so-called ex-felon, I think that if you're not a felon anymore, you get your voting rights back.

I agree. I think the moment you step out of prison, if you're not in some sort of halfway program that they set up, then I think, yeah, you should get your voting rights back. You did what we said. Weole or whatever. Then I think, yeah, you should get your vote. You did what we said. We said do this. You did this. And now we're like, yeah, but you still don't get all your rights. You know, like maybe that's part of it too, is that maybe instead of just like opening the door

and being like, all right, well, you know, good luck, buddy. Maybe every release of a certain classification of crime or after a certain amount of time in jail, maybe every release is always into some kind of halfway program. Yeah.

You know, maybe that's part of the rehabilitative program. I suspect it is. Maybe there is in Norway or whatever and in the Scandinavian countries. I know that they shift down from higher levels of prison down to much, much, much lower to the point where they're just like living on like a grounds that they just don't leave from. They have to be there sort of thing.

But it's like, like I've seen some of the, some of the things that they have to do and it's, they get a chance to be part of society again. And they, and I think that they probably don't treat them like felons when they come out, you know, where, you know, think about being a felon and walking in to try to get a job, filling out an application. It's not every application, man. Well, you have to lie. You have to lie and hope you don't get caught. Yeah. That's all that you do. What else could you do? I mean, if you don't lie, you're basically saying like, Hey, you should throw this away for me. Yeah. I filled this out. Please throw this away. I remember on the,

there is a record store. This is going back. Record store. Oh my God. Did it sell records? Yeah. It was called Crow's Nest. It was in,

in Joliet. Well, is that mostly CDs? It was CDs, but yeah, they were record store. Okay. That's what they started out as.

I know. Yeah. Wow. Yeah. So then there's CD store. I remember Crow's Nest. Yeah. It's a CD store.

And then, and it was the cool hit place to work if you were... Yeah. But I remember on their thing, the application, it says, have you ever done drugs before? It was on there. And I remember...

The employees? I know some of them. Yeah, I know some of them. Yeah, I don't know. I'm curious what those employees said because I put... I put this that I initially I wrote. Yes. Yeah, of course.

And then my dad was like, my dad was like, don't put that on there. What is wrong with you? Yeah. And I was like, what are you talking about? He's like, you have to lie. Yeah. And I was like, but why would I lie about that? He's like, just fucking lie about it.

Stupid. And I was like, why do you think they're asking? It's a disqualifying question. So they got a resume, or an application back from me with a clearly erased portion of the Bible. Hey, man, how long did you work there? I never got a job. Why would they ask that question

if not to disqualify people? I was so stupid. I was stupid. That's so funny because it's just you, man. You're like so honest. You're like so honest. I totally put it on there.

If I thought it would have gotten me a job, I'd have written your fucking name on that thing. You're an idiot. Oh my God. Ready to stick it in the glory hole? Get links to their Facebook, Twitter, and if you still use it, Google Plus account at their website, dissonancepod.com. If you need to be all discreet about it, contact them by email at dissonance.podcast at gmail.com.

Or you can call and leave a ransom message at 740-74-DOUBT. That's 740-743-6828. Want to hear Cognitive Dissonance commercial free and gain access to exclusive content, including full patron-only shows? Head to patreon.com forward slash dissonance pod and become a patron to support the show on a per episode basis. Love commercials? Not ready to become a patron?

Give the guys a five-star review on iTunes or Stitcher. Or tell your buddies in the drunk tank about the show. We want to send a big sloppy glory hole to all the patrons and people who rate us. You fucking rock. The world has gone to shit. You know what the best part about this is?

What? Trump has made it great again The world is just a piece of shit The thing is he made Trump made Canceling talks with North Korea great again So this is from CNBC Trump cancels Pompeo trip to North Korea

Cites lack of sufficient progress on denuclearization. Huh. Who would have thought it's only the 17th consecutive time that a promise was made by the Kim regime to discontinue nuclear fucking advancement, and then they fucking oopsie-bootled on that. Wait, though, Tom,

didn't he tweet about this, though? I think he said, I fixed the problem. But didn't he tweet about it? Like, isn't that a way to know someone is being honest with you? I swear he said, I fixed the problem. Didn't he tweet about it? Like, isn't that a way to know someone is being honest? I swear to God, I'm going to kill myself on air. I swear to God,

I'm going to kill myself. He presidentially tweeted. Why is that possible? I can't even. Did he post a fucking Instagram selfie of himself? Like pouty selfie. It would have been awesome. If posted a pouty selfie about canceling the Pompeo trip. Sprouty face.

Not saying Pompeo looks like they don't want none of this denuclearizationism. What a fucking idiot. God. So basically what this means is Is that the Secretary of State's not heading over there Yeah Because it's pointless But we've already conceded part

Like that's the thing This is the thing that nobody remembers Right? They won! Yeah They beat us, they outsmarted us We've already given them concessions They outsmarted us. We've already given them concessions. They outsmart us because in this gladiatorial combat,

we chose the wrong champion. Right? We chose trial by combat. And we had like the 60 pound weakling. We said it's Stephen Hawking to arm wrestle. Are you kidding me? You're ableist. How dare you?

It's just because he's dead. You're talking about because he used to be in a wheelchair. Well, he's not anymore. No, I was. I'm talking about because he's dead. I was talking about ableist in that he was not alive. You're not able to do anything when you're not alive. Just ask John McCain.

John McCain in death still insulted Trump. Like hard. Okay. Hard. Can we talk about the flag Going up and down the staff all week Can we talk about how That's the most movement That a 72 year old man's staff has had Has had in a while

A lot of up and down Things are going up and going down on him Which is crazy I wonder how much that costs For him to have something to go down on him. Some people got really upset that I made that comment about Trump giving oral last time.

I don't know if you saw. Wait, what was the comment? Well, I said that, can you imagine Trump giving oral? Like it's like riding a pommel horse. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Some people were like, oh my God, I can't believe you said that.

Here's the thing, guys. Understand this. And this, I just want to, I just want to clarify. If Trump was giving someone oral, it wouldn't just be that he's spreading their lips. He'd have to, cause his paunchy face, he'd have to spread his own lips. So he'd be, he'd have to like, he's had two different hands spreading lips to like pull back the cheeks in order to just to get his, even just to expose his, his mouth. You know what I mean?

Like I'm going to die. So that's, I just wanted to clarify that for the audience that was disgusted about Trump giving an oral. Well, and now I'm disgusted. I just wanted to clarify that for them. Thank you, that really helped me, Cecil. I just wanted to clarify for them. I died inside. Yeah. John McCain fucked Trump in the

pooper. He did. Two different ways. And it's amazing, he's having Barack Obama read at one of his funerals, give a eulogy, and then former President Bush is going to have somebody write his to give. He'll have like a ring

going on sideways. He'll be looking at fucking Michelle Obama with fucking big love puppy dog eyes. Fool me once. Shame on John McCain. I want to sit next to Michelle. I'm a fucking big love puppy dog, guys. Fool me once. Shame on, shame on John McCain. I want to sit next to Michelle.

Sit in her lap. But it's so funny that he's gone out of his way to say, you know, fuck you. But he went out of his way to say fuck you to Sarah Palin, too. I don't know if you saw this, but she was not invited to the funeral. She was not invited to the funeral.

She was not invited to the funeral. Way to take my candidacy by being. What I will say about Sarah Palin that I won't say about Trump is that they released a statement. The Palin family released a statement afterwards and said, we don't wish to talk about it with the media. We wish the best for his family.

They were classy. They were just classy about it. They were like, you know, we... They were classy. They were classy. They were just classy about it. They were like, you know what? It's not personal. We're just... And, you know, like, the thing is, it's like hats off to you.

You wrote something down that was not, you know... How did she release it? Did she... She tweeted it. Did she tweet it? Did you see... Did you see, though,

when he's sitting in the room, when Trump was sitting in the room with Melania and they're sitting there and someone asks, what did you, do you have any things on John? Do you have anything to say about John McCain's legacy? And his dumpy ass is just sitting there facing forward

and he's not saying anything. He won't, he doesn't say anything. And then you see Melania's face and she's, because they're still taking photos. So she's trying to smile, but then she looks like she's going to cry. And then she jumps back to smiling. Like there's like a gif that was going around that I saw

where you could just see her kind of going, because her face is like, you know, like she's clearly That is not a grin, it is a rictus. She is, you know, I feel bad for her because she has to put up with that shit. And this is a guy who's so,

this guy is so petty. I mean, how petty do you have to be to be like, I outlived that guy, but I'm still mad at him? How petty do you have to be? Well, it's not like John McCain did anything to him personally. He did vote down on that on the wall or whatever it was. There was something like this. It was the repeal of ACA or whatever. But it's politics.

Right. It's not like he punched his son. I actually don't think Trump would care. I actually think disagreeing with Trump would have a greater impact than impacting his son. It's just so crazy to me that we've gotten to the point now

where this isn't even, that's not even a blip. Where we're just like, where that idea that he wouldn't lower the flag. Yeah, well, he lowered it for the minimum amount of time in break with tradition. Exactly. It was like a day and a half is like the minimum amount of time for a sitting senator or something. But like, it's typical to keep the flag at half staff through burial. Yeah. So through internment

and then it's allowed to be moved. And that was the American Legion and the VFW who exerted pressure on Trump basically as a voting block of veterans. Yeah. It was the only thing that got him to sway.

Yeah. Which is fucking insane. Can you imagine though if that would have happened during Obama? Like there's so many things every week that we could say this for. I mean, we could, we could do a whole podcast that was like, what if that was Obama?

Right. You could do a whole podcast with that. But seriously, like, like this is one of those things that you're just like, I, I genuinely think there would have been riots if that was Obama and nobody even cared. No, because it was just like, we expect even cared. We expect the least. We expect the very least. I don't know how anybody can see this guy

and be somewhat conservative and look at this guy and be like, that's my guy. I wonder about the people I know that are, there's a couple people I know that are Trump supporters, but they're also military. And I wonder how they feel about this. Because this is a huge slap to a veteran who got caught in Vietnam.

Yeah. Tortured and held for five years. Couldn't lift his arms up more than 80% because of the damage that he received over there. I mean, come on, man. You can't honor that guy.

And it's the easiest thing to get right. Yeah. Right. You don't have to concede anything. He's dead now. Yeah. He can't hear you. Yeah, you literally,

all you have to do is just keep the flags down and just smile and say he was a great... All you have to say is three words. He was... Or it was four words.

He was a great man. He was a great man. That's all I have to do. Four words. He was a great man. What do you think of John McCain's Lennox Day? He was a great man.

I mean, you don't even have to mean it. Like, you don't even have to mean it, man. You could even go so far as to say John McCain and I disagreed on a lot of really important issues, but he was a patriot to the day he died. Right? That's that is enough of a fucking qualified

statement that it's just true. It's just true. That's true for me. Yeah. I disagreed with John McCain on a lot of things, but the man was a patriot. Yeah. I don't necessarily think being a patriot's a good thing, but still, it's a truth. Yeah, it's a truth. Like, it's a truth. Yeah. I disagreed with John McCain on a lot of things, but the man was a patriot. Yeah. I don't necessarily think being a patriot's a good thing, but still, it's a truth. Yeah, it's a truth. Like, it's a truth. Yeah.

And it's an easy truth, and it's a respectful truth. Like, it makes me crazy when it's, like, the easiest thing to get right and we get it wrong. Yeah. And it's like, you didn't have to try. Yeah. It's just that your pride is so fucking wounded, you fucking enormous man child. It's almost,

it's got to be a sickness at this point. It's something that you've got to look at and say, that's a sickness. That's not a normal person doesn't do that. How are we looking at it

and being like, that's the most qualified person in America to have this job? I love the video you showed me earlier where they're asking about John McCain and he folds up his arms

like a three-year-old who didn't get snacks. He is seriously like, looks like a petulant baby. Yeah. His body language is just. Yeah. But that's a guy, but that's the problem with you when you elect somebody who's never been told no.

Right. Yeah. That's the real problem. He's, he's a child. Yeah. He's a child who wants everything. And if you don't give him everything, if you don't cater to every single one of his whims,

he's going to scrunch his little brow up and he's going to fold his arms in front of his chest. I think it should be cause for concern when a grown person has a tantrum. Yep. And he has multiple tantrums. When a grown person throws a tantrum, it's like, oh,

okay. You are not self-regulated. Yeah. That's not good. And we all lose our tempers. Sure. That's okay. But like, we're talking about like a regular occurrence, not like a,

well, that's notable for how infrequently that occurs. Exactly, right? Well, and it's just like, you know, that's notable for how infrequently that occurs. Exactly. Right. Right. Well, and it's just like, you know, to, to the, the publicity of it too. He has no qualms about throwing a tantrum. No. He's proud of everybody. Yeah.

It doesn't matter because where is his disincentive to, where are his disincentives? He's going to wake up wealthy and powerful no matter what happens here. Maybe. I mean, it depends. If he goes to jail, then he won't be wealthier. Oh, my God. I don't see that happening. It's a possibility. It would be a fun to see that fucking pudgy shit in a fucking orange

jumpsuit. It'd be amazing if he resigns, Pence becomes president, he gets convicted, and then Pence doesn't pardon him. The Bible says they're going to eat their arms. The Bible says they're going to eat their babies. Then it says they're going to eat their children. That's what people do when they get hungry.

Oh, this is great. This is right. We can watch Jim Baker won't wear a Trump hat in the street for fear of being murdered. Interesting. Um, this is not a line of reasoning that he totes every single week on his show. So let's see if this one's any more,

uh, cogent. Well, let's just see if there's some way to make a joke about this one. All right, let's do it. What's it going to take for the church to really stand up during these next election years?

I'm very concerned because if we don't, God's not mocked. God's mocked every week. We've mocked you. We have mocked God episode 431. I think God is mocked every week. We've mocked you. We have mocked God episode 431. I think God has mocked quite regularly. Are you saying, is he saying that like we should vote in a way that pleases the Holy Spirit? Because if not, we're going to reap the consequences of that. God has

a Trump bumper sticker. And if we don't follow it. So do you remember when there wasn't democracy yet, but there was Jesus? He was real interested in how people were going to vote before voting was how things were decided.

I think there was democracy then. They just didn't have it there. There wasn't. I was going to say, not there, there wasn't. No, I mean,'t have it there. I was going to say, not there there wasn't. The concept was there. Where civilized people were. The concept was there.

But the actual democracy part wasn't. There was like an emperor or something. Also, these people didn't know about the existence of the continent of North America. The emperor ran against Hillary Clinton. People in America are mocking God. We're in a serious time.

There's a lady that has a shirt back there, that t-shirt. Would you say, pray for 45. That lady looked like she was going to cry. Did you look at her face? She was sincere as fuck. I mean, she looked like she just watched an ASPCA video. She looked like the sad Sarah McLachlan song was playing and there was a puppy with mange.

Right. And it was so sad. To be fair, she also looks like one of those people that just fucking cries all the time. You know what I'm talking about? Oh, I know. Just fucking, oh yeah.

Something, something, big weepies. Oh my God. Are you going to have another bowl of weepies? Jesus. You exhausting banal housewife. Die in your housecoat. Jesus Christ. She's probably a really nice lady. I don't care

about her fucking Rice Krispie life. Nobody cares. She probably has a great Rice Crispy treat, though. Maybe she switches it up once in a while and does Golden Grahams. Nobody cares. She's useless. I care. Fuck you. Are you kidding me? A Golden Graham Rice Crispy

treat? Let's pause for a second. Fuck you. The Golden Graham Rice Crispy treat is far superior to the Crispy Crispy treat. No, not when it's a brown butter crispy treat. But you could brown butter a golden graham. No, it's not the same thing. Have you tried it?

Yeah, it's not the same thing. It doesn't work as well? It's not as well because the golden grahams have a... So what you need for a brown butter flavor is you need a very clean palate. And if you don't have that, if you come in with a strong flavor, that's why chocolate compliments it so well, right?

Chocolate compliments the brown butter because it's like, oh, chocolate does have that dark note. It's like that sort of sharp, bitter note, but all the sweet and then the buttery comes out. There's not any of that. It's just sweet. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's just overpowering sweet.

That's why the brown butter Rice Krispie Treat. Is it vastly? I think I've had one. Vastly superior to the standard rice crispy treat? Vastly superior. Because I had a rice crispy treat literally yesterday. Vastly superior. And it was amazing.

Vastly superior. I'm going to have to do this. Yeah. Make your own marshmallow too, by the way, everybody. I made my own marshmallows for her recipe, and I was so pleased with myself. They're not hard. It was cool.

I was like, I made marshmallows. Egg whites and sugar and gelatin. And I like gave one to my kid and he was like nine or ten and he's like, I like the jet puffed ones. And I was like, I'll fucking choke you to death with a marshmallow right in front. You had

three kids, huh? That's why one of them's dead right now. It was, I would be livid if somebody, I mean, just pretend. You pretend all day, kid. That's your life. You pretend that that little car comes to life. I pretend I love you.

Just pretend for 10 minutes. I've been thinking, Lance, you are truly I think he's trying to, he's really just like, you are truly... I think he's trying to... He's really just like, you're truly... And look at how much Lance Wallenew is eating that up. He's just leaning forward.

He's got the thinker pose. And he's just eating. He's like, tell me more about me. Can you talk to me about me? It's like when he turns like, tell me all the things you love best about me. Make a list. And I want you to see it in alphabetical order. In fact, write it down.

We shall bronze it and hang it in the foyer. The following are my best traits. Oh, gosh. Is it my modesty? Is it my humility? Yes. To both. The wrecking ball.

Preacher. I mean, you brought Trump right out there. He's naked on that video. He's swinging. He's swinging. Love handles drooping over his fat ass. You brought Trump right out there. He means that in a good way.

Yes. Yeah, he does. I know, but I mean, because you're not afraid. Yeah. And you weren't afraid to stand up for Trump. You labeled him what God told you about him? But now this shirt she has there, I've been thinking, I don't dare wear a Trump hat. And I'm confessing, I'm confessing it.

But the evil in this country is so... Look at Lori. Lori's job is just to purse her lips and tilt her head at a seven degree angle. She's like a human cocker spaniel. Lori looks like somebody always asks her if she wants a treat. Lori, want a treat? Do you want to go outside?

Want a treat? Want a treat? Want a treat? Jesus Christ. Lori, want a treat? Lori, want a treat? Want a treat? Jesus Christ. You want a treat? It's so funny because he's like standing over with a dick in his hand

in bed like, you want a treat? Want a treat? Just cocking her head. She turns her head. It'd be great if he like tucked stuff in there to like hold it.

Like he's got like a bar towel in his hand. He's like, you want a treat? And then she turns her head and he like tucks it in there so he could like wipe his hands off or whatever. And then he takes it back. But she really does have a job where she just looks at the camera once in a while.

Yeah. It's like she hears her name. It's like. Yeah. I actually do want to tell a story though. Like when we lived, when we lived rurally, I did not want to put a Darwin fish on.

I got a Darwin fish as a gift. Yeah. And I had a car that I, I wasn't, it wasn't that I wasn't, uh, I didn't want to fuck up. I didn't want it messed up.

Like I was like, you know, it wasn't a car that like, like I don't care much about cars. I don't care if they get a dent or a scratch or whatever, but I didn't want somebody like physically maliciously attacking my car. And I can't, and I was living in a place where I figured that would not be accepted. Yeah. Right. And if you wore a MAGA hat in Chicago, people might say some shit to you. I don't know if you remember, we were walking in New York. Do you remember when

we were walking in New York? Oh yeah, yeah. And I said, as a joke to Eli Bosnick, I said, yeah, I think I'm going to vote for Trump in the, in Oh, yeah, yeah. And I said, as a joke to Eli Bosnick, I said, yeah, I think I'm going to vote for Trump in the election. And this woman turned around. Yeah. She's like, fuck you if you vote for Trump. Then she turned and walked away. I remember.

It was crazy. But it was like, seriously, in certain places, if you advertise certain things, you're inviting that to you. Yeah. You're saying, you're basically, you have a megaphone. You're saying, hey, man you have a megaphone. You're saying, hey man, I'm doing this thing. And unless you're willing to defend that thing,

you know, maybe you shouldn't be in the public square with that thing. Yeah, I agree with that. We don't have to make political statements, right? When I go to work, I don't generally talk about politics or religion or you know, it's just, it's not an appropriate space and that conversation would

not be welcomed. Yeah. So like if I don't want to engage that conversation, my response, I also wouldn't show up to work wearing a fucking religiously oriented or politically oriented article of clothing, right? Like I just wouldn't do that. Yeah. Because it's not an appropriate, like I can't have that conversation

in that space. But, and I'm not saying that this person should be harassed. You shouldn't harass the person, but you should expect something to happen. If I went down to a really racist part of the United States, which is most of the United States. So south of I-80. Anywhere in the United States, basically.

And I wore a Barack Obama hat or something. The O. Do you not think I would catch shit? Do you remember when we were in Michigan and we were shooting clays with those guys? What if I showed up in an Obama hat? Like, you don't think

those guys would have... You would have been one of the clays. You don't think those guys would have said some shit to me? Of course they would have said something to me. I don't know that we would have been welcome to hang out.

We probably, they would have said, no, we ain't got enough room for you. Right. Right? So, you know, like, there's a, like, the things that you do when you show who you are

through, you know, specifically when you turn yourself into a billboard. It's a way to communicate. You're communicating something. So I don't agree that he's going to get killed, which is what he's going to say. But, you know, he might face some backlash. And I think he's afraid of that. Yeah.

I love I love it. The thrust of what he's going to say here is I am a coward. You should feel bad for me. I guess that is his final point. If I was a Republican, which I had been my whole life, I couldn't wear a hat with my candidate on it

without concern about being murdered in the streets. That's a little hyperbolic. How many people have been murdered because of their MAGA hat? I will say there was a guy who drove into a bunch of protesters, but none of them had MAGA hats on.

Yeah. Right. Yeah. It, this is, this is a fucking red herring of all red hair. Yes. Right.

Because Trump holds rallies where thousands of people show up. Exactly. Right. Like he is the president. This underdog thing was like, nobody's allowed to support. He is the president. Let's not pretend that he does not have a significant amount of political sway. Yeah.

People, a lot of people like him. And he still has rallies. Right. Like you said, he stayed yamling like two weeks in. Now, come on. What's wrong with America? Why are we putting up with this? What if every church member's got to pray for 45,

made them up themselves and do something? You know, America is freedom of speech, freedom of everything, freedom of religion. And yet... It's not freedom of everything. It's freedom of everything. Freedom of everything. You can do whatever you want.

It's the purge. This isn't America. You can do it. Anytime, all the whatever you want. This is the purge. This isn't America. Anytime, all the things. I pledge allegiance to the purge. The Christians are cowering back and living in fear. Oh yeah, this is the time for Christians

to live in fear, right? We're appointing our second uber-Christian to the Supreme Court in about 40 minutes or something And then all the judges that they just fast-tracked Did you see that with Schumer? Yeah, no, just let him in And then, like, did you see the whole kerfuffle

Around Trump talking to his Evangelical counsel? And being like, you guys should all make sure your people vote for me But yeah, the Christians are cowering Those Christians are hiding There's not hardly any of them Taking meetings with our current president. And they're not just hiding.

They're only hiding in the voting booth. Even though we've elected a president, unless we move out in God, it will be the last president we ever elect. It could be right now, actually. I'm going to be frank. He's also super not your president. That guy doesn't give a

shit. He is using you like a fucking tampon. Yeah. You're a reservoir-tipped condom. He does not give a fuck. Full of a load. I believe there can be

a revolution. But you also believe lots of crazy shit. Like if I were to write down all the crazy shit Jim Baker believes, like the fact that you believe something does not lend it credibility. But Jim Baker believes it. Well, a restoration.

And I'm concerned. They're putting us in a corner. Right. Nobody puts baby in a corner. I was waiting for it. And I won't shut up. So, Jesus Christ.

What was that sound? Do you think that she cocked her ad? Oh, for sure. I'm so proud of my Jimmy Jam. Will you throw my squeaky toy? We need our pastors to stand up. But they send messages to me. Constantly.

He sounds like he's going to cry there, Tom. I got to rewind that. Don't you dare do that. Here we go. We need our pastors to stand up. But they send messages to me constantly that i will be killed that i will be through what who who some fucking report people that say you're gonna be killed who said they said messages who's the pastors and yet i don't stop

i'm in the united states. Because I want more money. Wait, hold on. So, hold on. What he just said was, he's like, they keep threatening me. They keep saying this stuff. They tell me to quit,

but I don't stop. But you won't wear the hat? Like in this case, you're brave. But then another case is, he's a brave coward. He's a cowardly lion. He's like a lion? Yeah.

Oh, nice. Yeah. Good. He saw the wizard. It was a whole thing. Well, he's very good at constructing straw men. Nicely done. He's of America, and I'm threatened because I want to preach the gospel of Jesus Christ.

I believe the Bible. I believe this whole... He can't even find it. He loves it. He loves it so much, he can't even find it. Where loves it. He loves it so much he can't even find it. Where did I put that book full of things that helps me fleece the people? He's like, have you ever seen Princess Bride when the guy stands up and he keeps

checking for his keys? He spends 35 minutes like he's basically telling the guy to steal third where he keeps tapping everywhere. It's the same thing. He's looking for his book right now. He can't find it. Book. Why can't I believe this book? In America, you cannot believe this book without being harassed. Well, here's what you do if you don't want to be harassed.

Don't try to turn it into law, right? It's real easy. If you don't try to turn it into law or don't try to change the school board with it or don't try to bronze the fucking thing and put it on City Hall, I don't care. Like literally sleep on it, cut a hole in it and fuck it. I do not care what you do with that book. Like it doesn't matter as long as it doesn't fucking affect me. Right. Yeah.

But they, they would say that they have a prescription from their book to like elect certain, you know, to, to act in certain ways. And so any time that they can't act in all the ways that they've picked and chosen and discarded the rest from their book

of insanity, then their rights have been trampled on. You want answers? I think I'm entitled. You want answers! I want the truth! You can't handle the truth! Alright, this story is from New York Times. 19 non-citizens voted illegally in 2016 in North Carolina. Jesus Christ. I'm going to give you that

number again. Tom. Cecil, 19. Yeah, 19. Did a little math. Man. Let me get on my calculator. Can you tell me how much, how much, how many more we need to find to get to the 3 million number? Yeah, so let me just double check. What? 3

million. Okay. That is 3 and 6 zeros. Minus how many again? 19 it is. 19. Let me double check my figures. It's 19. Yeah, that is three and six zeros minus how many again? 19 it is. 19. Let me double check my figures. It's 19. Yeah, that leaves us with 2,999,981. We're inching closer to that number. It's true. It's true. But you know, like we talked about this before the show, the 19, that's

just in North Carolina. It is just in North Carolina. So, you know, there's 50 states. Let's extrapolate. And round up to 20. Yeah. alright, so let's go 20, but, you know, some of the states are more populous, so if you think they're representative by population, we'll even grant some wiggle room there. Some wiggle room. Let's say 25 per state.

25 per state. You know, because maybe we didn't catch them all. You never know. They're ne'er-do-wells, my friend. Times 50. Okay, that is 1,250 votes nationally. Now, 127 million people voted. You forgot Puerto Rico. It's 51. Let's give them another one.

Okay. 1,251. I was going to say you were just going to take all the population and say they're all illegal. Well, and then minus 3,000 because those are dead. Oh, those ones are dead. Those are all legal. Well, and then minus 3,000 because those are dead. Oh, those ones are dead. Those are dead now.

Yeah, those are dead people. All right, so 1,251. I vote dead people. And 127 million people voted. Okay. So this was percentage-wise 0.00098%. We're inching closer.

So that is a significant statistical percentage. The 19 people were they found by that vigilante who said he could find, who had all the statistics or whatever, that guy who had his 15 minutes of fame, who said he could find 3 million people and add all the numbers. Where is he? We're like, it's been a year and we're all just like, where's that dude at? Huh?

He's not around. 19 non-citizens have done a lot more damage to this country in my lifetime. Yeah, one of them just killed somebody in Iowa. Jesus Christ. And it's funny when you read this article and they talk about

some of these people are like from 14 nations, including Japan, Germany, Mexico, and Korea. What I love is just like, yeah, the Germans are just like, I don't know how to vote this. I don't understand. Do I vote? Do I not vote? I don't

understand. Yeah, it's fucking amazing that it's these other countries too. The Japanese guy left his shoes outside the voting cubicle. That's terrible. But we have this idea that there's all this massive voter fraud. And they dig through and they're like, they don't find any. My favorite line in this article.

None of those votes altered the outcome of a political contest. No shit. None of them came down to 19. None of the 19. Yeah. So I just think that's a great story. It's a political contest. No shit. None of them came down to 19. None of the 19. Yeah. So I just think that's a great story. It's a funny story. You know, the thing is, if there is rampant problems

and really crazy amounts of voter fraud, I am, I don't want voter fraud. Like, I don't want voter fraud. You're not pro-voter fraud? I'm not pro-voter fraud. I thought you were a liberal. I thought you liked pro- I am from Chicago, but I'm not pro-voter fraud? I'm not pro-voter fraud. I thought you were a liberal. I thought you liked pro- I am from Chicago, but I'm not pro-voter fraud. Not everybody here likes pro-voter fraud. You're a guy who won't

even mark, I didn't do drugs on my fucking job application. But, you know, I don't want to see that happen, but I don't think it's a problem. And I think the research is going to bear this out when they just keep on trying to dig to find $3 million and the best they're scrubbing up is 19.

Well, they're still trying. Yeah. So it's been a year. Yeah. So how many years will it take to find the other 2.9 million? Hang on. At this rate. At this rate.

At this rate. So we found 19 a year. Let's give them 25 a year. Okay. Yes. That's fair. That's fair. And they need to find 3 million. That's a lot. Okay. That's fair. That's fair. And they need to find 3

million. That's a lot of zeros. Ah, 25. Cecil's going to take 120,000 years for them to find. 120,000 years? Yeah. Or about half the entire history of humanity. Will Trump still be president?

Because it feels like it's already been 110,000 years. So on Monday, we'll read our patrons and do all that stuff and go through some email, but no email on this short show. We're going to leave you like we always do, though, with the Skeptic's Creed. Credulity is not a virtue. It's fortune cookie cutter, mommy issue, hypno-Babylon bullshit. Couched in scientician, double bubble, toil and trouble, pseudo-quasi-alternative, acupunctuating, pressurized,

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