Cognitive Dissonance - Episode 462: Despair Gray

Episode Date: March 25, 2019

Stories from the Week

This episode of Cognitive Dissonance is brought to you by our patrons. You fucking rock. Tom, Cecil, listening to your latest episode, and listening to Rick Wilde read off a list of things that will get people thrown into the lake of fire. And it occurred to me, isn't their hero Donald Trump guilty of most, if not all, of those things? What the fuck? Glory hole. Hi, Tom and Cecil. I am an elementary school teacher in Connecticut, and I love your show.

And I thought of you guys today when I was trying to teach my class about global warming and showing them a video from the Weather Channel about how the ice shelf in Antarctica is melting. And as I was trying to show the kids the Weather Channel clip, the kids started calling out, glory hole, glory hole. I want to see the glory hole. So I got really angry and then I realized the Weather Channel had some kind of a glory hole pop up on the side of the website because there's some kind of glory hole lake somewhere else in the country. And I thought of you guys.

Glory hole motherfuckers. Hey, Tom and Cecil. I was listening to your podcast, 461. And just wanted to let you know I am a United States Marine. And we can actually take a joke. So I don't think any of us will kick your ass. Although, that being said, I can't speak for all of us. We are a bunch

of drunks. Glory hole, motherfuckers. Bye. Be advised that this show is not for children, the faint of heart, or the easily offended. The explicit tag is there for a reason. Recording live from Glor studios in chicago this is cognitive dissonance every episode we blast anyone who gets in our way we bring critical thinking skepticism and irreverence to any topic that makes the news makes it big or makes us mad. It's skeptical.

It's political. And there is a beat there. No, welcome Matt. It's been a little while. It's been a little while. You forget that we're skeptical and political. I was wondering if we still were. You never know. Maybe. Depends on how much you pay us, actually.

We can be whatever you need. We're still waiting for that $25 million patron. Like, man, I'll put cigarettes out on my arm for $25 million. There's nothing I'm not saying. Yes. I will admit like 50 people to college for $25 million.

At least 50. Well, the first 50 are free. And by free, I mean like a million. It's like a free big Mac coupon that they get. They can show up for their first day. Oh, my kid's on the soccer team now. That's amazing.

I love that they Photoshop their faces on there. It's the best. It's such the best. You know what I love about the Photoshop piece? It's like that means that the coach is like, I don't know if your kid's really on the soccer team. Send me a pic or it didn't happen. It's a dick pic.

It's a soccer dick pic. You're going to be like, oh man. It's a kick pic. A kid gives great hat. That kid scores all the time. Oh, man. Put that right in the end zone. You know what I mean?

I don't know. In the end zone. That's still soccer? Is that? Goal! Oh, Jesus Christ. So, if you're not familiar

with what we're talking about, we're talking about Operation Varsity Blues. I think that's so funny, by the way. Operation Varsity Blues. You know they thought they were so clever. The detectives were like, oh, I got one, Jim. Oh, I got one, Jim.

Hey, you guys remember that show? Remember that show, Varsity Blues? You're not going to say Drag Night, are you? It's Blues because they'll be sad when they're arrested. I wonder if they handed out letterman jackets to all the arresting officers. Yeah. So 50 people busted for paying $25 million to get their rich kids in school when they

could have just paid the half a million dollars and made a fucking fountain or something. I have a library. A library. Right? Yeah, whatever. There seems to be like we have a whole bribery system that's legal and you don't need to circumvent like you could go through the legal bribery system. Well, I mean, we're already,

I mean, genuinely, we're already in that system for kids when they go to school and they're in grade school. It's called the property tax system, right? The property tax system basically creates the more money you have, the better those schools are. And that's what

they're trying to recreate in the higher education. And they already do that. Jared Kushner's dad gave like $5 million, I don't know how much, $500,000, whatever, half a million dollars for him to get anywhere ever the fuck he went to how much, $500,000, whatever, half a million dollars for him to get anywhere wherever the fuck he went to.

It's the thing is like, so it looks like you guys need a new aquatic center. Yep. And it looks like, incidentally, now I wouldn't put these two things together,

but my kid is probably going to apply to a fine institution in five, four, three, two. Well, what's this in my upper breast pocket? Is that admission paperwork? Is this an endowment or the application?

I don't remember which one is... You're just sliding checks in the guy. You're like fucking good girls. You're like, hey, fucking forget about it. Here's a fucking check for a half a million dollars. Do something nice with it. Build a fucking aquatic center or something. It's a fucking check for half a million dollars. Do something nice with it. Build a fucking aquatic center or something. Nice school you got here.

It'd be a shame if you didn't have an aquatic center. It'd be a shame if my son didn't go here. I'll cut the head off your mascot and put it in bed with you. What the fuck? I gotta say too, if I were rich rich, like bribing millions rich, I wouldn't give a shit

if my kid went to school. I want my kids to go to college so they make money because I'm not giving them any of mine. Well, it's funny because there was somebody who was talking this week. I don't remember where I heard it, but they were saying it is not an indicator of more wealth for someone if they're already rich and they go to an elite school, it doesn't really change their earning potential. But it does, if you are coming in disadvantaged, it drastically

changes your earning potential. And so them knocking those kids off, you're basically ruining the earning potential of some possibilities of kids that might've gone. And instead, your kid wasn't, it didn't even matter. Just like, it's like buying a fucking Mercedes or an expensive car, more expensive car than Mercedes. I don't know what that is. I don't really care,

but you know what I mean? Like a Bentley, Bentley's expense. So Bentley, buy it a Bentley. It's just a, it's a brand. It's so you could put a sticker on your car.

It has to be because I was thinking like, like if I, if I was rich, rich, I'd be like, you don't need to go to college. Poor people go to work. Yeah. Like,

what are we doing? Why would you go to college? That's so true, man. So that you can do what? Apply for a job? Yeah, exactly. We're rich. Our job is the Mel D's.

Like, I don't give a fuck. That's the reason to be rich. Yeah, man. There's no reason. Fucking A. Like reason i don't understand rich people that go to work i've never understood like i'm rich i gotta go to work i'm rich like as a regular guy i go to work so that sometimes i get to pretend i don't work right that's called vacation and weekends yeah weekends nights vacation yeah i i like I live a life where 50 weeks out of the year,

it's like, ah, fuck, I got to wake up and hate myself. Yeah. You know? And then two weeks out of the year, it's like,

uh, if I was rich, I'd be like, well, I'm not going to fucking play at working. I would not. Yeah. I would never take my one week off a year to do shitty stuff. Right. You know where I'd be like

if I'm not doing anything all year I'd be like you know what I really need to push myself this week. Nope. Right. Nope. Nope. My whole life is vacation. Yeah. And then my kids would be like where should we go to college? What? When you're 16 drop out. We're going to party. We're going to Paris. The nanny raises

you until you're I don't know old enough to speak. Don't look going to Paris. He raises you until you're, I don't know. Old enough to speak. Don't look at me anymore. What are you kidding me? The whole point of being rich is to abdicate your responsibility. I think though people would say, it is true, right? Just give away everything. But I think what people

would say to that is, if you don't keep yourself occupied or whatever and you're rich, then you're just going to go crazy. Cause you know, there's only so much, you know, shooting champagne on your model's ass. I'm willing to find out how much.

I know. Right. Like, look, $25 million patron. I'm willing to test the boundaries of how much champagne I can fit on a bubble butt. So,

well, that's bubbly. But actually it's a bubbly butt. So if you... Well, that's bubbly butt. Actually, it's a bubbly butt. I'm just waiting for my turn to be the crazy rich polar bear at the zoo. You know what I mean?

Like, I want to be the crazy polar bear at the zoo that paces back and forth. But in Fiji. You know what I mean? No, I pace between these exotic locales. Right. You know? Yeah.

What are you having for lunch? Gout. Yeah. And a stick of butter. My dad got me my first job because he owned a business and he knew a guy who owned a business. And my first job that he got me

was at a place called Prime Car Care, drying cars in the winter with towels. That's how poor people connect to other poor people, right? Right. But when you're wealthy, it's like, my dad got me a job. What's your job? CFO, I think. My first job was a nepotism job. My mom worked. My first real job. Now, I had a couple other jobs before then that really didn't pan out. Paper route type stuff? Well, I was paper route.

And then I also did, when I was in high school, I worked at a dealership drying cars. It's called a porter. You go get the car. You bring it in. Chappy hands, man. Chappy hands. They fired me after a month. They didn't need me after a month.

They just let me off. They let me after a month. They didn't need me after a month. They just let me off. They left me off. They let me off. I was a good worker. Like, I was constantly doing whatever they needed me to do, but they were just like, we don't need you.

I was like, okay, well, that guy with seniority stays. I don't. Right. So they let me go there. And then I had a, I had a Burger King, not a Burger King,

a McDonald's job for a week. And then quit when my buddy quit. My buddy's like, I'm quitting. And I'm like, I'm quitting too. Cool. We both left. But I didn't, I didn't really do a lot. And then quit when my buddy quit. My buddy's like, I'm quitting. And I'm like, I'm quitting too. But I didn't really do a lot. And then I got my first job with my mom. My mom was a baker and bookkeeper at a catering company that ran a cafeteria for a large corporation. And I worked there as a porter.

Okay. Like delivering orders. I did that for several years until I got promoted and promoted and promoted. And then I quit that to go to school. But that was what I did right out of high school. Right. And I got that job specifically because my mom worked there. And my brother, my older brother worked there.

Nepotism is a perfectly perfectly normal way for people to find work. We hire, at my current, we hire people's relatives and friends all the time. It's just that when you're ultra wealthy, you got a job as a banker. We had to show up and work real hard to keep that job.

You just got there. But let's be real. If your dad owns the fucking company and they just have buckets of money and they're shitting out fucking But like, let's be real. Like, if your dad like owns the fucking company. Yeah. And they just have buckets of money. And they're shitting out fucking millions and millions and millions of dollars all the time. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's like, what are you going to do for a living? Like, I don't know. I'm just, I'm going to fucking pull my penis out and show it to people. That's what I'm going to do. I'm going to, here is my penis. And I want to check for that. You're walking by everybody's desk and they're just putting

post-it notes on it to cover, you know. They're just like, no, leave me alone. What they're using is actually those little, like, marker, like those little thin post-its

for like, yeah, booking a, yeah, like a note in a note in a note kind of a thing. It's like a fettuccine down there.

What's going on? What I want is like, I want to pull my small dick out and get a giant novelty check just for the difference. You know, I want the- There's a giant novelty post-it note they put on you to cover it up.

No, you have to use a bigger post-it note or I'll fire you. So let's transition, Tom, into this story about the college admission. Well, this actually made a lot of sense. So this is Liz, ten fingers. Eight fingers. That is true. Croaking.

College admissions scandal proves QAnon's mass arrests are happening. Yeah, okay. Let's hear what she has to say about this. I'm going to talk about the college scams. After I text. The college scam story.

She's literally texting right now. Look at your body. She's literally texting or something. She's not looking at this camera. And she's like, I'm going to talk about this thing. I'm going to say I'm going to talk about this thing again. Oh, my God. My last video got another like on Facebook

Oh my god Oh wait am I on my own camera now The cheating scam story Um Holy shit get to the meat of the argument Here lady 12 seconds You're on your own camera

You know that right like this is your own trick This is what I do to my wife I ignore her the most important thing people need to understand about this story one of the most important things is um is that for 21 seconds you wasted my time you entitled bitch say anything 21 seconds of my life for you to be like, I'm distracted. Oh my God. You know, if you're that fucking distracted, don't start talking now. What are you, like a fucking cashier at Hot Topic?

What the fuck is going on? I'm like, check you out. Oh God. Customers. The mass arrests are happening Lori Loughlin Felicity Huffman getting arrested that's two it's two mass

it's two two is mass it depends on where you know what she should be talking about because you know she's going to be talking about pedophilia

she should be saying mass arrests in the sense that the Catholics are getting arrested that's true a mass arrest that's be saying mass arrest in the sense that the Catholics are getting arrested. That's true. A mass arrest. That's true. A mass arrest.

But it's not. It's not though. She's talking about this shit. Well, maybe they haven't reached critical mass. Maybe. And that would be varsity blue balls.

It's a different, it's a different, it's a different sting operation. These celebrities were sealed indictments, people. The mass arrests are officially happening. We are seeing the beginning.

That's pretty unofficial. Yeah. I want to say, like, for the record, that, like, the arrests are for a different thing than you said. Also, there were only two. Now, there was two celebrities. Two celebrities. Right.

She's all fucking hopped up on goofballs on the celebrity. Right. It was two celebrities. Two celebrities. Right. She's all fucking hopped up on goofballs on the celebrities. Right. It was two celebrities and a CEO. When I was listening to news reports about this during the week, people had asked,

so is it a bunch of celebrities? Everybody's like, no, it's a lot of people you wouldn't know. Yeah. It's just like rich people you wouldn't know. Does Felicity Huffman

count as a celebrity anymore? I don't even think these people count as a celebrity anymore. They're like our list of celebrities. It's like, I was on Perfect Strangers or whatever. Is Perfect Strangers the one with Belki? I got it right.

It's the Belki one. I couldn't remember what show she was on. It's the Belki one. So I think it's Perfect Strangers now What is She's in Real Housewives of Miami or something Right? One of them was like a Real Housewives of

Orange Miami or something I don't even know Of the sealed indictments being unsealed We're seeing the beginning of The evil members of the Freaking cabal being exposed. And this freaking, the freaking cabal. Freaking cabal.

You frickers. You're freaking those kids. Mother frickers. This is just the beginning. This is just the absolute tip of the iceberg. Okay. So just the tip. It's just the tip.

It's just the tip. Just for a second. We're just going to see how it feels. Yes. We just need to see. Just relax. It's probably not going to feel good. You know what? Just go with the indictments. Let them happen. The more you fight. Anyway, it's a whole thing. No more comments, please. On any of my social media or on YouTube saying, uh, one of arrests are going to happen. Well, all right, even, hold on. Even if I believed you up until, which I most assuredly don't, but those were legitimate

until the thing you said was going to happen, happened. Right, yeah. I like that she's indignant about it. Like, no more asking me when the things I predicted are going to happen. That's rude. No more me verifying the things that I said would be true are actually true. Right. Well, these are sealed indictments. They're sealed. No more me verifying the things that I said would be true

are actually true. Right. Well, these are sealed indictments. Sealed. And now they're unsealed. And they say something different, but I don't care. This is the dumbest shit I've ever seen somebody try to connect to something else. I mean, and it's, what was she saying before? She's talking about people fucking

eating babies' faces like sashimi, man. Yeah, I know. Like, seriously, like, I know they put sushi on naked girls sometimes, but, like, you don't just, like, hack the face off a baby and just be like, this one's wiggling around, man. You run out of

sushi, just take a bite out of the girl, and you're like, I'm doubting you, Liz, that gonna happen they're happening they are happening right now i think the reason why they chose her is because number one they're trying to prepare the public for understanding that people that we think are wonderful people, just great American people. They're not. They're evil. They're Jekyll and Hyde. They're wearing a mask.

Okay? Number one. And another reason why I think that the good guys released and unsealed these arrests first is because... Oh, my God. Are you seriously? Thank you. This is like a speech class from like 10th grade. She's not only looking at her notes on the side, which you could totally see. The audience can't see it.

But she's looking at her notes. And another reason why my second point is, like, I mean, like this is this is literally the form in which you deliver a speech in fucking high school. I am telling you that the world is full of pedophiles. And I will prove this in three points. The first, point number one, the beginning point. The first one that I will start at is prime. As a point, it is the prime initial point from which the other points will branch from, allowing me to get from point one to then subsequently point two and possibly

three let's not get ahead of ourselves let's roll it back roll it back therefore yeah in conclusion point two it's so bad it is so bad it is real real it is exactly how you would imagine a nervous 16-year-old giving a speech. Right. Yeah. What they were arrested for, and I do believe that they, there could be more charges that are brought about against them.

But the charges that we're reading about and we're seeing now. Literally nothing to do with pedophilia. They're not about eating children. In fact, they have to do with like, helping kids. Yeah. Like if you watch a lot of... You're so right. That's so true.

That's so true. It's the opposite. Right? It's bizarro world indictments. Because let's be honest, like those kids without a little help, that's when they were fucked. Yeah, exactly. Even with a little bit of help. This was the lube they needed.

Varsity Blues was the lube to squeeze them into college. And if you like lube, and you probably do, you should go to adamandeve.com, type in Gloria Checkout. You'll get 50% off almost any item, a free sex swing and free shipping.

They're white collar cripes. They're not that shocking. Normies are being shocked right now. I'm watching liberal. This is the least shocking thing I've ever heard. Rich people cheating. Sometimes kids cheat in school. Oh, okay. Yeah. I literally cheated all the time. Sometimes rich people pay extra for their kids to go places illegally. Yeah. Oh, okay. Yeah. I assume that's how like lots of boob jobs get done in Mexico. That's fine. I figure they're paying people off constantly. You know, in legal and illegal ways, there's lots of ways

that money opens doors, right? Like let's just move the illegality out of it like money just opens lots and lots and lots of doors it just makes things happen across everybody's world that's just that's the fucking reason we have money money wouldn't do anything or have any purpose or nobody would want it yeah if it didn't do right right like it's the only reason that money and power can be equated and let's be real they absolutely can they are 100 so like rich people are using money and power oh okay yeah well that's i assume why they wanted to be rich because it's why i want to be rich sure but yeah i want to be like i want to sit in that nicer seat yeah you know for real for real for And, you know, we talked a lot before the program.

We know that it's illegal. Yeah. We're still trying to figure out why it's illegal because they're private institutions. We know that the institutions themselves were not accepting the bribes. These were individuals with the institution, some of the coaches and things like that. And so they're bending the rules there. The coaches are bending some rules to get people in, breaking the rules.

They're not bending rules. They're breaking the rules to get in. They're basically taking, one of them was a water polo. They had to bribe the water polo coach $250,000. I love that. It's like, what team is nobody watching?

I'm on that one. I'm on that one. Nobody cares about. I'm on the one that I'm on that one. Nobody cares about. I'm on the one that you don't know the rules for. There's a girl from the water polo

who was super pissed. She's like, it's really hard to play water polo. It's hard to get in. Yeah. And I was like, I bet it is.

Yeah. Like also there's a reason somebody chose water polo. Yeah. Right. And not basketball. Let's let's don't fucking kid yourself.

Yeah. Well, and so Tom and I were talking before, and we don't really know why. Yeah, I'm not clear on it. It's illegal to cheat on the ACT. We know that they have prosecuted people in the past for cheating on the ACT. Right. But again, we're still sort of like, that's cheating on a test. We don't know how that's illegal.

But it is illegal. Because these aren't like required. You can just choose not to take the ACT. We don't know how that's illegal. Yeah. But it is illegal. Because these aren't like required. You can just choose not to take the ACT. And it's not like a government program. The ACT is just a private company. That's a private company. The SAT is a private company.

And like schools. Do they fight like outside? Like do they get into like. ACT and SAT? Do they get into like. Oh, ACT lost bad. Yeah. Yeah. SAT is like the thing now.

Is it? Even in the Midwest. Yeah. Is it really. Yeah, SAT is like the thing now. Is it? Even in the Midwest, yeah. Is it really? Yeah. I took the ACT a lot, but it was two decades ago. We all did back in the 90s in the Midwest.

We all took the ACT. Very few of us took the SAT unless you were going to like an East Coast school. But the SAT is the bigger test nationally. Oh, I didn't know that. And the SAT took over really dominance of that arena

in the last few years. Yeah, I just read something not that long ago about it. But yeah. But like, they're just like, those are private companies and like colleges are private companies and they can set whatever rules they want and they can choose to admit Cecil and exclude Tom and they don't have to tell you why or tell me why. Yeah. They don't have to publish their standards.

I was like, well, couldn't a't a standard be well he gave me more money yeah but again they're getting in the back door because of the varsity blues lube we talked about earlier but they're getting in the back door through these coaches and so it's not

going through the process that everybody else has to go through but again I don't know how that's breaking the law because like, like I can run a club and I can say, Tom, come to the side door. I'm going to make everybody else wait behind this velvet rope, but I'm going to let you win because you're my buddy and you could come in,

you know, and hang out in the club. I don't understand how this is like, I mean, I, and I'm not trying to be shitty and I just, I just, we know it's immoral.

I know it's immoral. I know it's wrong's wrong right i just don't know how it's illegal like i don't know how the police are involved like i could see like like i could see i could see yale getting involved right and like x like like firing yeah firing the people involved kicking the those people out of school um barring those people from ever you know applying to anything that they ever do again blah blah blah disseminating their name across the United States so that everybody knows that they cheated to get into college, whatever it is that they would need to do to basically protect their brand. I understand that.

Right. I just don't understand how it's illegal against the law. Yeah, man. I'm baffled by that too. It's like, I'm with you too. I know that it's taking opportunity away from people. But again, I don't know how that's against the law, right? I don't know how that's breaking the law.

That happens all the time. Opportunity gets taken away from the poor all the time. That's called being poor. It's called, that's why it's cyclical. Right. Yeah. Yeah. So I don't, I mean, I genuinely don't know.

If somebody knows why it's, because we watched, we watched videos on it. We tried to figure it out. We just can't figure out why it's a leak. I Googled about it for a while and all I found out was that it is. It is.

And I'm just like, cool, cool, cool. Why? Girls freak out about this. I'm watching normies freak out about this and I'm just sitting here like, oh God.

God, I hate that word. Normies? They're outraged by this. Like, wait until they hear about how people in Hollywood eat babies. Oh, my God. Well, who are they going to hear it from? Who's going to tell them?

I've been waiting. Oh, wait, Cecil. It's not the sealed indictments that are going to tell them that. They're unsealed once they get unsealed. They unseal the rest. They're Schrodinger's documents. That's what they are. Yeah.

Real quick. Oh, yeah. Both her hands are up. Yeah. So we could see. I'll roll it back just a touch. I want to see her fucking fingers. It's her right hand.

Oh, they're not the whole fingers aren't gone. No, it's the first. She just got declawed. Yeah. Here you go. It's not even that big a deal. just got declawed. Here you go. It's not even that big a deal. She got declawed. Oh, no.

It's just the fart knuckle. It's just the nubblers. Yeah. She's just got her nubblers removed. That's all. She can still give a lady

friend a good time. What are you kidding me? Yeah. And now she's got more girth than length. So. Eat babies. Oh oh my God. God help people that are freaking out about this,

because this is the least of the crimes that these people are guilty of. I'm not specifically saying Laura and Felicity, I'm just saying in general. Wait, yeah, what she's saying is celebrities in general eat, I'm not even kidding. Celebrities in general eat babies. That's a true, and they fucking eat babies. This is, I'm just. Yeah, it's absolutely true. And so Lori and Felicity bribed a coach to help their kid into college.

And that's the least egregious of the celebrity crimes. Lori and Felicity might not be baby eating baby fuckers. But she called them the evil cabal earlier. Well, because they're celebrities that are in trouble. So they all live under the umbrella of celebrity, I think. I don't know. My brain is broken. Yeah, I

think you broke yourself. Now you're going to power down for the rest of the night. This is nothing compared to what these people are capable and what they're doing, particularly to children. But I believe the white hats are trying to slowly prepare the public for what is about to come. So they're starting off. Again, like you got to like lube us slow before we're going to like believe this. Do I have to do some warm up exercises before i deadlift my pr that day

like what seriously like what what do you go like like why would you need to is there anything that's ever happened like that except for what you were just saying anal sex or working out i can't think of anything else like i don't have to like it's not like oh i guess a third thing i need an appetizer before i can have the main course. I don't know anything else though. To be fair, I have two main courses. Like I'm willing to do, like go that route.

Absolutely. Like I'll wake up and eat a main course from wake up. Every cruise ship I've been on, I've been like, you could just keep bringing those until I'm done. And I will tell you when I'm done. What I would like is 36 lobsters. That's what I would like.

And I want them. 36 lobsters. Here's what I want. I want I want them. 36 lobsters. Here's what I want. I want 36 lobsters in a tank, and I want them to fight, and I want the weakest one to die, and I'm going to eat that, and then I'm going to eat the next weakest one, and the next weakest one, and I want you to save the strongest one. He's going to be my pet this entire cruise. And I will name him Pinchy.

I'll name him Liz because he's got one little craw. Starting off small, white collar. Yeah, starting off small, that's pedophilia. That's what you do.

You start off small. That makes sense. You really got to prepare us. Just like we always get prepared by the government for other major calamities. Yeah, absolutely. Do you remember when they

prepared us for the space shuttle explosion? They just like, what they did is they crumpled a paper airplane in front of you. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you're like, oh my God, the humanity. And then they did it again.

But this time they had Michael Bay add some explosion sound effects. And then they just showed us the actual thing crashing to the ground. We got to be prepared. What would happen if we weren't prepared? I don't get it at all. Like, would there be a fissure or something? Again. But again, this is the fucking brain train

she's on right now. She's trying to say, these pieces that are coming out, I've got to explain why they're not the exact pieces. is she's trying to say, these pieces that are coming out, I've got to explain why they're not the exact pieces. Right. And the only way to explain why they're not the exact pieces is because, well, hey,

they are going to come out, but they just need to prepare you for this. This is like her saying, I'm going to get this amazing Boggle score. Yeah. And then somebody being like, here's Connect Four. And you're like, games, games.

Games, games. Every game's the same game. You can play this. And you're like, games, games. Games, games. Every game's the same game. You can play this on your tabletop. Tabletop games, games, gather round, ages four and up. Boom. It all connects. Connect Four. She's trying to shove, she's trying to shove like a king from chess into the Connect Four piece.

Our crimes, and we're slowly going to get up to the bigger crimes which involve treason, trafficking kids, satanic ritualistic abuse, and all those horrific things. Of course, cheating on the ACT is the gateway drug to eating a baby's face. That's what it is. That's exactly it.

That's why I believe Lori and Felicity were charged. She just zoned out to look at her phone again. She zoned out to look at her notes. So that's why I believe Lori and Felicity were charged. Oh my God. She just zoned out to look at her phone again. She zoned out to look at her notes. Oh my God. She's looking at her notes.

I looked it up though, because she was talking about like how, oh, this is trying to, you know, these are the celebrities. We're trying to make sure that, because she's trying to, I think her argument is, is that we don't really see celebrities getting arrested.

So when we see, they're trying to prime us for this, right? So I looked up how many have been arrested since the beginning of the year. Okay. And only ones that I recognize. Of celebrities. Yeah.

So since the beginning of the year. Okay. Conor McGregor. Oh. Jesse Smollett. That was the big guy here in Chicago that got arrested. Oh, the Lion Liars and the Lion Lot?

Juicy Smollett. I don't know. Tom in Chicago that got arrested. Oh, the Lion Liars and the Lion Lot? Juicy Smollett. I don't know. Tom Sizemore. You remember him from Saving Private Ryan? He got arrested on a crack charge. Really? Yeah, like a drug charge.

Chris Brown. Probably beating somebody up. Maybe a girl. R. Kelly. Oh, yeah. R. Kelly was a big one, right? She was six. My favorite one.

To Catch a Predator. Dateline reporter, Chris Hansen. No! Turned himself in in Connecticut for not what you think because he failed to pay

almost $13,000 worth of promotional materials. And he wrote a bad check and he had to turn himself in. It was not for what I... Because when I first read that, I was like, oh no.

That'd be great. If somebody told him to have a seat. Who would sit across from him? Who would sit? I first read that. I was like, oh, no, if somebody told him to have a seat. Oh, who would sit across from him? Who is it? I don't know. He like walks into the room.

He's like, oh, motherfucker. I should have seen. I should have seen. I am surprised they never caught a priest on that. I wonder if they did. I didn't watch them all.

So I don't know. But I'm surprised they never caught a priest. Surprised they didn't catch R. Kelly. Are you kidding me? He stands up and pees on the guys. They're going to roll off him like urine on a Rain-X windshield, those charges.

Did I ever tell you my R. Kelly story? No, we have an R. Kelly story? So I'm walking home. I had a little too much to drink one night at a friend's house in the South Loop.

My wife and I had several bottles of wine at their house. And so we're walking home. We're a little tipsy. And we're walking by. I live by a Bar Louie in the South Loop. I'm walking by Bar Louie and there's like a Bentley or something out front. Bunch of people standing around it.

And there's a woman who's got like a camera, but like a photographer. It's like a big camera. And she's like hey and i said hey she said you guys want your picture taken with r kelly and i said no and then i went home that was like literally that was all yeah oh my god yeah i like that like you know you're a big goddamn deal celebrity when you have to solicit strangers.

Hey! Doesn't anybody want to take their picture with us? I'm a big deal. No, no takers? You had to get her assistant to ask me. That's amazing. Isn't it supposed to go the other way where you're like,

oh no, so many people want to take the picture with me. Go find some people want to take the picture with me. Not like, go find some people that will accept a photo with me. And I wonder if it was like when you go to Vegas and there's a guy in a Transformer outfit and you got to pay him a dollar. Was I going to have to pay R. Kelly

money to get a photo with him? And I didn't want to sit on his lap. To be really honest, I was not interested in that. You know what? You're nowhere near the right age for that to be a problem. You know? You would not get a present. I guess that's true.

No golden shower for me. Well, what happened is she'd take your picture, and then, like, when you left the bar, she'd charge you, like, $29.99. But they now take credit cards to swipe, so it's cool. According to a recent poll, 49.3% of the people in New York believe that our leaders knew the 9-11 attacks were planned

and that they intentionally failed to act. Are 49.3% of us just fucking crazy? All right, this story is also from Right Wing Watch. And Vandersteel. God, I love that last name. His names are amazing. Vandersteel. Yeah.

New Zealand massacre was a left-wing false flag. So this is referring to the massacre in Christchurch, New Zealand. That's fucked up, man. It's fucked up. It came out of nowhere. 50 people.

Yeah, and that guy who did it, amazing shit they're doing. They're not releasing his name or they did briefly and then they just won't mention it again. They won't talk about it anymore.

They're not allowing him internet or paper or TV access at all. They isolated him. So he can't even like watch the shit that he did. He can't put it together. He had some interesting things to say. He referenced PewDiePie.

Oh, I didn't know that. Yeah, so he said, right before he goes in, I guess, he was live streaming it on a helmet cam? Oh, I did. Yeah, he live streamed that shit to Facebook. And he said, before he went in, he said, remember everybody subscribe to PewDiePie, and then he went

inside. And I think it's, I was listening to a podcast, I think it was the Daily Podcast, where they were talking about, there was a guy who was talking about it, and he had said it's not so much that it's PewDiePie, it's so much that it's, instead it's, it's so much that it's

instead, it's, because I know that there's people out there who think that PewDiePie's racist, and I don't know anything about PewDiePie's work, so I don't know. I know he's a very, very well-subscribed YouTuber, the most subscribed to YouTuber. I know that. I know him that much, but I don't know anything

about him. I know that he has made some insensitive comments, I guess, in the past, but I don't know enough about him. I know that he has made some insensitive comments, I guess, in the past, but I don't know enough about him. And I don't really... And to be perfectly honest with the audience, I don't care enough to be educated on whether or not he is... What he has done, or I don't care enough about it. There's never going to be a time where I'm going to say the words, PewDiePie, in a sentence that I care about. There's never a world where I can going to say the words PewDiePie in a sentence that I care about. There's never a world

where I can use the word PewDiePie and care about whatever I'm going to say next. I don't even care about this. I stopped caring as soon as I said it. My name is fucking Biscuit Turds or whatever. I'm just like,

we can't do this right now. You're not a serious person. But in any case, he said that when he went in and I guess the guy was trying to explain it as he was basically, that was a wink to the audience as a, I am on the internet too guys. And I guess his whole manifesto is strewn with conflicting things that talk about, you know, he says he's a socialist, but then he also talks about his model as Trump and all this stuff. What we do know from his actions

is that he murdered Muslims. Yes. He went and murdered Muslims indiscriminately. And so we know he is anti-Muslim. We know that.

Yeah. We know he is xenophobic. We know that. Which is weird because he doesn't even come from that country he's like an australian guy which is weird he said he traveled to new zealand to show the world that no corner of the world no matter how remote was safe from the perils of mass immigration and that he could find large he went there because he could use the guns well that's why yeah right

because because he can't do that can't do that in Australia. Not anymore. Yeah. Australia passed him laws. Yeah. New Zealand passed him laws. New Zealand just did too. Yeah.

New Zealand passed him laws. But the idea here is that this guy, I don't know what's true except for the fact that what he did. This is like, this is a fucking edgelord moving into the world, right? And it's kind of interesting. When I was reading about it, it's like, this guy put on a helmet cam and live streamed this shit to social media to try to gain, to try to go viral.

And he did, because 150 million of these things were taken off of Facebook, something like that. It was a crazy amount. But he live streamed his actions to try to go viral in the moment. And we're in a world now where we can't pretend that there's a difference between our online world and our in the real world because there's just not. And you have a real-life version of a guy who wrote this long, Like you have a real life version of a guy who wrote this long, and it was described in everything I read it as trolling manifesto, 74 page manifesto full of unreliable narration and half truths. And it's like too edgy for me.

Shoot, shoot, shoot. You know, it online characters, right? PewDiePie and all these like, there's a blurring. That boundary is not a real boundary anymore. Never pretend that it's a real boundary anymore. Because what's happened is like, now people are shooting up the pizza parlor. Now people are driving cars into people because they're incels.

Now people are shooting up a mosque and live streaming that shit. That has all come around now. It's now all part of the same thing. I love what New Zealand is doing to combat this, right? Is Facebook took it all down. Every video that gets posted, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. They take it all down. New Zealand wipes this guy's boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. They take it all down. New Zealand wipes this guy's fucking identity off the map as much as possible. As much as they can, yeah. They don't give him the satisfaction of reveling in the news coverage and all of that. And then they ban fucking assault weapons.

Within four days, five days, something like that? And I read something. Gun culture in New Zealand is huge. It's huge. They have one gun for every two people in New Zealand. Gun culture in New Zealand is huge. So that's not a small

thing. That is not a small thing at all. There's a lot of buy-in for guns there. People like, they like their guns. I mean, one out of two is like, that's half per capita what the states has. That's a lot of fucking guns. That is. It's a tremendous amount of guns. And within a week.

Yeah. Do you remember that reminded me of when you're talking about him live streaming? It reminded me of Natural Born Killers. Do you remember that movie? Yeah. Very much. Impressioned.

Natural Born Killers in that way. I visited New Zealand when we were down in Australia. And I didn't, I was on the South Island, but I was in Queenstown and Milford Sound. I did not go to Christchurch. I wanted to go to Christchurch. I just didn't have time. I kind of wish I would have gone there instead of Auckland. I went to Auckland. I don't know if I'm saying that correctly. I don't really care, but I believe it's Auckland. It's Auckland.

But in any case, I went there instead. I didn't have a great trip there. The Northern Island, I didn't think was as pretty as the Southern Island. Southern Island is fucking gorgeous. It's seriously one of the most beautiful places I've ever visited in my entire life. And the people there were absolutely wonderful. They were, I mean, just like in Australia too,

like both those places, I cannot say enough about the people that I encountered and interacted with. They were amazing. They were just wonderful people to be around. And so, you know, I felt really bad when I heard about this because I, you know, I loved that country.

I thought it was amazing. And to see something like this happen there, it's just such a, I mean, it's like, you know, we have some good things to import. That's not one of the things you want to import. That's a bad import. That's a bad thing. But I want to play this clip. This is from Right Wing Watch. This is them talking

about how this is a false flag, Tom. You know, you look at his comments of declaring himself as a socialist and a fascist. Well, let's, you know, his actions are that of a white supremacist. Well, if you consider white supremacy and the KKK have its roots in the Democrat Party. Okay. They don't. Just stop with that shit. But that whole commentary refers back to a, it's rhetorical, right? Because there has been a dramatic shift in the Republican and Democratic parties and what they stand for.

shift in the Republican and Democratic parties and what they stand for. And yeah, it's like when they claim Lincoln as a Republican. It's like, yeah, okay, fine. You can claim as a Republican because he was a Republican, but your party has changed from what the Republican party was. They flip values. All that's happened is it's a fuck, it's the same name. Yeah. That shit is some weaselly liar bullshit. Yeah. They do it a lot too. And they point it's a fuck It's the same name That shit is some weasley liar bullshit

They do it a lot too and they point it out a lot And I looked it up today just to see Because before When I heard this I thought Maybe she's right Maybe there was some roots of the KKK And the Democratic Party It makes sense because the Democrats were the Southern Democrats

It makes sense right But it doesn't origin There's no origin. Initially, it wasn't even a political organization. And then they eventually became a political, and really, it was more anti-political, trying to stop people from, and then the Democrats started to

do a lot. But those, the entire thing flipped during the Civil Rights Movement. That's when it flipped. Oh, yeah. Hundreds of years, like a hundred years after the KKK started, right? Yeah, right. KKK, KKK. KKK, KKK.

How many K's are in there? How many chuggas before you choo-choo? It's four chuggas on an abbreviation, eight if you're going long-term. Chugga-chugga-chugga-chugga-chugga-chugga. Choo-choo.

That's it. That's two. That's eight. That's if you're going a long-term. But you can also chugga-chugga-chugga, chugga, choo, choo. No, you would never do that. That's an acceptable number of chuggas.

That is not an acceptable number of chuggas. You are crazy. That is a... It's eight. I feel for the people you have to pleasure. That's all I'm saying. If four is an acceptable number of chuggas, Tom. Four?

Why is the people... Why are you timing out? Why are you timing out so quick, Tom? First of all, you can have more than one choo-choo. There's definitely more than one tunnel that the choo-choo can go into. And I'm not a quitter, goddammit.

I'm not spending my whole day on chuggas and only getting to one choo-choo. All right? That's true. I'm not spending my whole day on chuggas and only getting to one choo-choo. All right? It's true. Okay, I'll give you that. Thomas the tank engine over here is not quitting. Oh, God.

This clearly is a leftist tactic. And sowing division and trying to create hatred and racism in a country that is so multicultural and so integrated. Don't they hate multiculturalism? Haven't they really been railing against multiculturalism forever? Fucking yes. And the KKK celebrated when Trump got the... And David Duke was like, yeah, one of ours. And then they marched in Charlottesville and said blood and soil

and they lit their weird little tiki torches and marched around. And the president claimed that there were fine people on that side of the argument. After people had already driven a car into a group and killed someone, he said that. How in the world? Don't forget that, right? That somebody had already died

when he was like, good people on both sides. Good people on both sides of that charger. As a country with so many different nationalities there, it's really a melting pot in New Zealand. It's the furthest thing from the truth. And this gentleman came from Australia. The truth. The truth.

It's the furthest thing from the truth. The furthest thing from the truth. Australia there to carry out this horrendous act. So, you know, again, this is, you know, Don Podesta was down talking a few weeks ago about the fact that New Zealand, he was there, he was interviewed. He was talking about New Zealand is ripe for Russian and Chinese election meddling in 2020. Well, it has nothing to do with a white supremacist shooting up a mosque. What on earth could you be? How could you link these two things together?

Well, for fuck's sake, do you think that somebody would do that to try? I mean, I think maybe she's implying that, that the left is controlled. Left is controlling it. And,

but when it's a false flag, people really die sometimes and sometimes they don't. Yeah. False flag can mean whatever they need it to mean. It can mean a lot of different things. Right. Right. I think it's a blanket. Well, a flag term. You can use the flag as a blanket if necessary.

Just kind of drapey drapey. Tell you what, those old veterans get pissed off when you do that. They do not let me in the VFW anymore. Not after dollar beer night. Well, yeah, like I say, you're just folding up little American flags and sticking it in their G-string. You know, the thing they hate is when you fold them into that triangle and then you flick them between your fingers. You play football with a little tiny flag.

Oh, God, that was grandpa. It's flag football. That's why you play it like that. Makes sense. Otherwise, why would you even call it that? That's just dumb. Also, like, why would China and, like, Russia meddle in New Zealand's election?

Oh, we controlled the great international powerhouse of New Zealand. We got that Kiwi vote. Well, for fuck's sake. Thank God. Is it like proof of concept? What other reason? I know, right?

It's like where you do your war games. Where you plan this shit out. They're going to be like, well, we influenced the election of New Zealand. Let's see if we've replaced the regular leader of New Zealand, who I can't name. And I'm not sure if it's a president or prime minister because nobody knows anything about New Zealand. Did you hear her remarks, though? No, I didn't. Oh, she's amazing.

She immediately, right away, called it white supremacy and white nationalism and said it had no place in New Zealand. She was calling it out as terrorism immediately. Oh, I did read some of that stuff. Yeah, she was great. I don't know anything about her, though, so if you hate her, I don't know because I don't know anything about New Zealand's policies. The only time I've ever interacted with your leader is

when I saw her doing her thing. Do they even have policies? They're like 12 people. Can't they all just get along? There's like one sheep for all the rest of them. But seriously, she was great. She really handled it very well. And again, pushing, I don't know how much power she has in comparison to their other legislative bodies, but this assault weapon ban, immediate.

I mean, it's like really immediate in comparison. You know, again, more projection, more projection. You have him down there. You have a false flag event like this. Is it they're trying to take away all gun rights in New Zealand? What are they trying to do? And this is, of course, one of the country's bill that's involved in this Five Eyes scandal, which is, of course, tying back into this whole fake Russian collusion story and the Steele dossier, et cetera. So it's always the same bad actors that

seem to coalesce around these horrible events. What on earth are you talking about? Can you follow that? I can't. I'm so glad we can still be friends. I'm fucking so not can't follow. What I think they're trying to say is that there's a false flag. This is a false flag.

This is one of those things that just comes up to try to steal your gun rights. It just so happened that they did it in the wrong country because you could kill hundreds of people in a mosque here. Oh, we don't care at all. And we wouldn't even blink an eye. No. We've already made our choice, right? There would never

be an assault weapon ban if you killed Muslims in this country. No. There would never be an assault weapon ban. It literally does not matter the number. Yeah. You could load Muslims in a thrower and shoot them with a shotgun in our country. And be like, whatever. Doesn't matter. in a thrower and shoot them with a shotgun in our country. Be like, whatever. Doesn't matter.

I'm going to go shoot the skeet. I am pretty convinced at this point that there's no number of people that can be killed where we're going to do anything about it. Right. And like really that, that was pretty evident at Newtown.

Newtown is where I think everybody said. Well, everybody realized like, we're not, we don't care. Like, we're willing to make that trade. There's no number of children we care about. Yeah. There's not a single number of children.

Even when they're still a little cute and accidentally funny. Yeah, exactly. When they're sometimes adorable. Right. And they've stopped shitting their pants. That's the butter zone.

It is the butter zone. You get about three years of that. It's the butter zone. That's it. Yeah. And then they're just shitty. Shitty. Shitty again.

Shitty and probably using drugs. They just, it's like they shit. Stinking up your house. And then they're just shitty shitty shitty again shitty and probably using drugs just it's like they shit stinking up your house they're cute for an hour and then they're shitty again forever that's what my dad says enjoy that have you guys seen the r kelly documentary uh yeah pete i did okay now before i continue like this guy is a monster and uh he should go to jail forever but if you support the Catholic Church, isn't that like the same thing as being an R. Kelly fan? Like, no, I don't really see the difference. Only, like, one's music is significantly better.

This story is fucking awful. This is from France24. Lest you think that the Catholic Church is actually doing anything or taking anything seriously, here's this story. Pope rejects the resignation of French Cardinal Barbarin, convicted in child sex abuse cover-up. Now, not only did he, the guy flew to the fucking Vatican and was like, here's my resignation. And the Pope was like, basically like, Hey,

uh, something, something forgiveness, something, something. Some people are presumed innocent, even though this guy's fucking convicted and convicted. Yeah.

But there's a presumption of innocence that was quoted. Uh, I'm not going to accept your fucking resignation. Yeah. The Catholic church doesn't want to fix this. Yeah. They don't care. I think you agree.

In the middle of this guy's resignation, he's like strapping like a fake nose and a fake wig on a priest to send him off into some faraway land to hide him. He puts him under a giant solo cup and he sets two other solo cups next to him and he does the shuffle. He does the big shuffle.

He's like look kid you don't want to pick the wrong solo cup on this let me tell you something but no like seriously like this guy is yeah i'm gonna yeah i i fucking basically shuffled priests around i shuffled priests around i am convicted of covering this up we put good that girl that woman who bought her kid a fucking way into college had to give out a million dollars in bonds. Right. The actress. Yep. A million dollars. Yep.

Yeah. And she bought her kid a shitty thing to do. Not saying it's not a shitty thing to do, but she didn't cover up child rape. This guy didn't even get fired from his job as moral leader. He didn't even get fired from his job as moral leader. He didn't even get fired from his job as guy who knows what's

right and wrong and will teach you. For real, you had one job. You had one job. You did. You did. Don't not be you. For fuck's sake. These guys are so good at hitting people with rulers.

They should just slap these guys in the peepee. You know what I mean? Like when they have the, let's just keep on slapping the peepee with a ruler, like a yardstick. Don't put that in there. What's wrong with you? Stop that.

Like this Pope, people were excited about. I know. People were excited about, oh, it's the progressive Pope. You know, he is progressive,

but the problem is he's, he's progressive for a conservative institution. Right. Yeah. Right? Yeah. So he can be as progressive as he wants, but it doesn't matter because he's not going to cover up for the institution and the institution doesn't care about this. This is like, this just, this is hot on the heels of their like awareness raising fucking retreat that they just had about this? Did he not attend his own retreat? Well, no, but didn't we read though that that awareness raising retreat

instead focused on whether or not divorcees could eat communion? We really need to sit down and fucking cover the hard questions here, who gets to eat the crackers? That's the most important thing.

Now, if your first marriage didn't work out. Yeah. Are you still even a Ritz or is it a saltine? Is it an oyster cracker? What kind of, well, it depends on what the alimony was.

You only get 52% of the cracker. Definitively not Ritz. Not the Ritz. We can't not Ritz. Not the Ritz. We can't afford those anymore, honey. Put the Ritz back. You can get the townhouse. Townhouse. No, you gave her the townhouse.

Oh, there you go. Nice. She's staying at the Ritz. But no, man. That's what they were. they were talking about that shit they didn't even bring up the fucking hey remember when we raped a bunch of kids and then pretended it didn't happen we like look the other way and whistled really loudly do you remember that guys guys it only happened to like okay raise your hand if it didn't happen to you is your okay uh

you know what all you guys with your hands up, high five each other. You guys are moral leaders. Okay. Uh, welcome to the, uh, uh, morality and sex retreat guys.

Okay. We're going to go ahead. Everybody stand up. What I want you to do is say your name and, one interesting child. You fuck just one interesting child. They're all putting their keys in a big fishbowl. And then they make the altar boys come up and grab a key out of the bowl.

Oh, no. This is the worst retreat ever. Oh, Jesus. Okay, reach under your seat and you get a boy and you get a boy and you get a boy. They're all folded up underneath there. Jesus, man. Oh, this organization is the worst. Not only did he not get fired, he wasn't even allowed to quit.

You can't quit until I fire you. No, no, there's still a presumption of innocence. To the convicted guy. Oh, God, there's still a presumption of innocence. To the convicted guy. Oh, God, man. I was having a conversation with a Catholic this week, and I brought this up, and I also said that, you know, and I was saying, you know,

that this is basically a toxic brand. You know, Catholicism is toxic. And I said, you know, other organizations, it's in every religion. I was like, but it's, you know, other organizations, it's in every religion. I was like, but it's, you know, other organizations and they tried to pass it off as, yeah, it's in other organizations too.

And I'm just like, yeah, that's some whataboutism shit though. You know what I mean? Like I can say that because I'm not religious, right? I can look out at the world and be like, man, that isn't in my organization

because I'd fucking, I sure as fuck would fire that guy if I was in charge. It's not like Glory Hole Studios. I sure as fuck would fire whoever, you know, Ian,. It's not like Glory Hole Studios. I sure as fuck would fire whoever, you know, Ian, you can't rape kids. That's what I'm saying.

If you do, I'm going to fire you. Yeah, Ian. So stop sending those weird emails. It's in the handbook. It's the only thing in the handbook. It literally, you know, that's what they should do. You're right.

They should just have a handbook with one printed page. Yeah. Don't fuck kids. The end. Yeah. The end of the handbook with one printed page yeah don't fuck kids the end yeah the end of the hand just what about page there's no page two yeah until you're really good at page one yeah until everybody can get literally on the same page in recognizing a communist physical appearance counts for nothing if he openly declares himself to be a communist, we take

his word for it. If a person consistently reads and advocates the views expressed in a communist publication, he may be a communist. If a person supports organizations which reflect communist teachings or organizations labeled communist by the Department of Justice She may be a communist If a person defends the activities of communist nations while consistently attacking the domestic and foreign policy of the United States She may be a communist If a person does all these things over a period of time He must be a communist.

This story is also from Right Wing Watch. This is Kurt Schlichter. Crush that shit. Good for you. Shit licker. This is Kurt Shit Licker. It is close. It's close to that.

I like this one because I sort of half agree with it. this one because I sort of half agree with it. Socialists will take your car and feed you vegan nightmare food. Alright, here we go. Let's see what this guy has to say. Okay, so to set the scene,

let me set the scene here. So we have a guy who's staring at the camera terrified. He's in front of a brick wall. He's got a blue Yeti microphone that you, you know, it's about a hundred dollar microphone that he has put in front of his webcam here.

And he's on a show, I guess called The Rebel. Yeah. And he looks like, he's dressed like Bill Belichick, if you know who that is. I was going to say, he's dressed wearing despair gray,

the sweatshirt. The sweatshirt is despairhirt which crayola box does that come in do you have to get the 64 to get the despair gray it's the one where you go to sharpen it in that box it breaks every half turn it is fuck fuck let me get sadness purple it seriously looks like it is the color of gray in a sweatshirt that you only see in like dystopian movies. Or like if they were to take a computer generate what a bug sees. Yeah. This is the absence of color.

Yeah. It's like when you look at things through like ultraviolet or something. Right. Yeah. Your cat can see better at night than you can. But your cat's sense of color... Your cat sucks at picking at a time. And his hair is the

same color as his shirt. And it gave up last year on this hair. Seriously. It looks, it looks like somebody at a fucking home colored it for me. I'm not even going to let you guess what home it was. And it looks like somebody weed whacked. Like this guy is amazing. You guys have to see what this guy looks like.

Yeah. It's worth clicking over to look at. It is. He's Tweedledee the human. I would kill everyone. I would kill myself. There's no way he owns a mirror. You know what I mean? You ever meet somebody where you're like,

you don't own a mirror. If he did, he'd peck at it. He'd be furious with himself. He's trying to bash his face up against his own mirror. Why do you look so ugly? There is no example in recorded history where the people promoting socialism didn't at the same time simply assume that they were going to be the ones in charge.

What? Does that? People who promote their political and economic theories definitely hope that through the promotion of those theories, those theories will be enacted in practice. That's pretty fucking standard. That is standard. That is standard. That's standard for ideas. Yeah. But I think what he's trying to say is the drivers in those societies, those people that were pushing hard for those ideals were the ones that wound up in power afterwards. Oh, is that what he said?

So the Lenins and the, no, Stalin wasn't, it was Lenin and, and what was the, what was that? Started with a T. What's that guy's name?

Trotsky. Okay. Trotsky. Maybe I'm misremembering, but in any case, there's a couple guys back then that really pushed for, you know, socialism

and they were the ones in charge and then their friends became the ones who were in charge after them. Right. Yeah. So, they were selling the most Amway.

I think what he's saying is like, like, socialist countries are also nepotism countries too. Ah, all right. Yeah. I mean,

society is. As opposed to every other... Yeah. As opposed to capitalism, where you got to work for what you get. You just call your dad and get you into college.

If you're Jared Kushner. Now, if you went to Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez and her commie friends and said, great, we will take socialism, we will impose it, but none of you advocates for

it can in any way participate in its operation. You cannot run it. You will not have positions of power in it. I think 100% they would be okay with it. I think so too. I think 100%. I think if you were to say to Bernie Sanders or

AOC or... First off, it's not communism. Let's just throw that. Let's just stop there. You're saying if we were to put your policies in place and he's equating that to communism, it's not communism. I can... I feel pretty confident. I don't know for sure, but I feel pretty

confident in saying, all right, we'll give you the Green New Deal. It's going to happen. You've got to It's just, it's going to happen. Yeah. You got to resign though. Yeah. But it's going to happen.

She'd resign tomorrow. Yeah. If it was, if it was a hundred percent. Yeah. If it was like, look, here's the trade. Yeah. We're all going to vote for it. We're going to vote for it. And then immediately after we vote for it,

so there's no takesies backsies bullshit. Yeah. We're going to vote for it. It passes, write it up. It's, this is the thing that you believe in more. But here's the trade-off is you gotta go home and get a different job yeah i think 100 because i would do it sure like if i was like yeah i'm really passionate i really want this to happen right if that was your thing and they were

like cool you know be like hey all right here's the deal time we hate you we love your idea yeah pretty much it i'd be like but it's still a great idea. So I'm okay. It'd be like if somebody was like, look, your cure for cancer, I'm going to not put your name on it. Yeah. I'd be like, total bummer. Yeah. I still cured cancer though, right? Yeah. Cancer.

I can sleep very well at night with whoever I want. You know what I mean? Yeah. Well, then it'll become a lot less attractive because it's not attractive in a socialist state to be the guy not making the decisions.

You know, when they talk about universal health care, the health care for you is going to be a long line at a doctor, seven-month wait to get somebody to look at your ingrown toenail.

Why would I get that when nobody else has that? Seven-month wait to look at your ingrown toenail. Why would I get that when nobody else has that? Seven-month wait to look at your ingrown toenail. By the time you get there, it's like a pulsating person at the end of your foot. It's like the Akira. That's a bulbous, weird, pulsating thing. You've got to shoot a laser at it in order to... Seven months without somebody looking at your ingrown toenail, you're going to have a hard time. That's all I'm saying. I feel like seven months, I'm just going to buy some toenail clippers. I'm just cutting it off.

Right. I'm just going to cut the whole thing off. I'm going to have one of those springy things that you jump around with, the amputees jump around with. I will create this emergency. I will tell you what, motherfucker. Do not underestimate my desire and ability to create an emergency.

Also, that's just not true, right? Like, it's just not true. I know that they like to tout that it takes forever to get any kind of medical attention in other countries. But on average, that's just not the case. I mean, it does take a long time for certain stuff, but not for everything. Yeah. And it's so funny because these guys will talk about it. Yeah, and it's so funny because these guys will talk about it, and then the unspoken counterpoint is, but in America now, you get great healthcare, right?

Because if you're going to say it takes seven months or there's a long waiting list, blah, blah, and then there has to be but opposed to the thing we have now. Sure. Except for the thing we have now is already worse than that. Yeah. The thing we have now is many people don't have any insurance at all, so can't go see a doctor. So they don't have now. Sure. Except for the thing we have now is already worse than that. Yeah. The thing we have now is many people don't have any insurance at all so can't go see a doctor. So they don't have anything.

Unless it's an emergency. And if they do, they go to the emergency room and then other people have to pay for it. Yeah. And nobody's going to the emergency room

getting an ingrown toenail taken care of. Nobody's going to the emergency room and getting their diabetes taken care of, right? Because unless it's an emergency, you can't go to the emergency room and get care.

Yeah. It's not a care place. Right. You know, like, I just had back surgery. I couldn't have gone to the emergency room to get back surgery.

I could have gone to the emergency room and they would have given me a pain pill and sent me home. Yeah. Tops. We have horrible medical outcomes.

Yeah. We're horrible. We're number, like, 23 in maternal mortality rates. We're horrible. We're number like 23 in maternal mortality rates. Oh yeah. We're worse than every other industrial net. We have terrible medical outcomes. I don't know why the narrative is that like, oh, but in America, you get, you're super fucking rich. They say the best health coverage, that's constantly the best health coverage you can get. It's, that's what you hear from that side all the time. But for example, you were telling me that it took you several months

to even book an appointment with a certain doctor because you wanted to go to a good doctor. Three and a half months it took me to get to this guy. Yeah. And so, but the same thing, like, here's the thing. Like I go to, I go to a, I have an HMO, had an HMO that was taking forever to get anything. If I wanted it and I had to get referred, right? So I'd have toMO, had an HMO that was taking forever to get anything. If I wanted it and I had to get referred, right? So I'd have to go, like in order to do something at my, to get anything done,

I would have to get referred to a specialist. So I would have to take my HMO, go see a general practitioner. The general practitioner, it would take a week, maybe longer to get a appointment. I would see the general practitioner and then I would say, my calf has been bothering me. Okay, what's wrong with it? It hurts when I

do this. Okay, don't do that. And then I would say, but I'd like to see a specialist. They would offer two things. You can go to physical therapy or you can go see a specialist. Which would you prefer? And I would go see a specialist. If I wanted to go see a specialist, I had to get on that specialist calendar. And that would take sometimes up to months to get on their calendar. I pay into an HMO with a very good health insurance coverage because my company is big. So I have a lot of sway in that sense.

So we have a good HMO, but it wasn't good enough for me. So I got a PPO. I'm still waiting to go see doctors. It's not like I can just walk into a place because if I got an ingrown toenail, I've still got to wait a week, two weeks, three weeks,

and I'm paying way more money than those people are overseas. Well, that's the other part of it, right? Like I took me three and I have a PPO. It took me a little over three months to get to see the guy that I wanted to see and took four months. Yeah, four months almost to the day

to actually get the surgery that I needed. And and took four months. Yeah, four months almost to the day to actually get the surgery that I needed. And the bill is going to be terrifying. I have no idea what it's going to be yet. But it is going to be thousands, multiple thousands of dollars. I'm not sure. They always tout this like,

it's going to take you a long time. It already takes me a long time. It already takes super long time. And I already have to pay more. And our health outcomes are shitty, right? And like, I pay more out of pocket, but I also pay more in terms of like, when they run the studies for how much people pay in premiums versus the amount that would raise people's taxes. Yeah. It will, I mean, there's no study, there's no study that you can ever find, none, where your premium, where the amount of money as a premium paying person, where the amount of money that you can ever find, none, where the amount of money as a premium paying person, where the amount of money that you pay is more in taxes.

It's always less. And it's not a little less. It's like a lot less. And then if you factor in the amount that your employer pays, which they're not paying you. Yeah. That's money that they could be paying you, but they pay someone else on your behalf. Yeah. It's ridiculous. It's ridiculous.

It's crazy. But they keep on saying how horrible it is in other countries. They have no idea what the fuck they're talking about. Our outcomes aren't even good. We're not even safer. Yeah. But for the socialists, the people in charge, their medical care will be just fine. There will be no expense spared. They will fly on jets. You will not.

We're all going to fly on jets, guys. You know, no one's taking away your jets. I will say that the Green New Deal does have a clause in it to try to get rid of jets in the next X amount of years to get rid of them, right? But nobody's going to get rid of jets until there's an alternative to jets. Because isn't that what it says? It says we need to phase them out as soon as technologically possible. Nobody's going to get rid of jets. Humankind

is too used to this. You're not going to just throw out jets and say we're never going to do this again. You know what the most economical way to travel is? Probably the airlines, right? It's not. Bus. Buses.

Bus is the... I totally didn't think about it. I was like, oh, buses is absolutely the most economical way to travel. Okay. Because the size of the motor, the amount of gas and diesel

or whatever it uses... That makes sense. ...in comparison to how many people it's transporting, right? I'm surprised it's not a train. Trains, we can't really tell in our country because our trains aren't really full,

so we don't really know. Oh, okay. So we don't really have really good country because our trains aren't really full, so we don't really know. Oh, okay. So we don't really have really good statistics on that. But they suspect that trains are about equal to airplanes, which is not terrible either, by the way. Airplanes and trains, if you fill an airplane up with X amount, if you have a big, full airplane,

and it's a big-ass airplane, it's not bad to transport. I mean, it's not awful to transport those people through the air with using that particular technology. Um, I know that they're trying to push for, like you say, push for it,

but we don't have a high speed rail here in this country. You know, there's high speed rails all over the other parts of the world and high speed rails go about half as fast as the fastest plane. So the fastest high speed rail goes about half as fast as I'm not saying fastest plane, the regular speed of a plane, like planes goes about half as fast. I'm not saying fastest plane. The regular speed of a plane. Planes go about 500 knots.

So a train would go half that speed. The fastest ones would. So it would be a longer time to get places. But I'll tell you what, if they had a high-speed rail here in the States and we had it where it wasn't crossing tracks, because I think that's the crossing... Like freight tracks and stuff. Not's the crossing, like, uh...

Like freight tracks and stuff. Not only freight tracks, but also roads. Yeah. That's where it gets dangerous. Those are the two times that it gets really dangerous is when it's crossing other things.

If it was just a track that goes from place to place and I didn't have to worry about any of that stuff, I would probably take that more often than I would a flight. Well, I think I would too because, like,

you could, like, let's say I got to go to California next month. It's like a four-hour flight to San Diego. Yeah. If I could take an eight-hour train ride and do it overnight and it was comfortable,

if I could just be like, yeah, plug in, go to sleep, wake up and I'm there. Yeah. It doesn't sound like a bad deal. It doesn't sound like a bad deal either.

And if it's cheaper or whatever, or it's saving the environment if it's billed as, you know, way more environmentally friendly, you know, I'm all for it. I think that, you know, way more environmentally friendly, you know, I'm all for it.

I think that, you know, like, I think we should shift. We should shift the things we're doing. We should do with less. These are dire things

that are going to be happening into the world. We just, we're all just too, we're just a little too stupid and a little too greedy, just a little, to cause all, like, the entire world to collapse.

You know what I mean? We're all just a little too stupid. Yeah. If we were just all collectively a little smarter, we would all just be like, hey, we need to fix this. And then we just would. But there's just enough stupidity in us. I think it's that selfish piece, man. It's just like, but it's fine right now. And I'm in the right now portion of the program.

And I'm not going to be in the next generation. So we all had problems. You know what I mean? We all have our cross to bear. Yours is no water. Yours is the environment is going to light you on fire. Mine was for a while the housing market crashed. That was bad. Anyway, you're not going to drink water.

So. Get used to other stuff. You know. Gatorade? Yeah, Gatorade's stupid. Alright, that's why you're not going to college, son. They will have cars. You won't. They will eat hamburgers. You will eat some sort of

vegan nightmare food. That was my favorite part. Admittedly, a vegan nightmare food is a hamburger. They're terrified of hamburgers. That's what it is. So we want to thank our patrons. We haven't thanked our patrons in a while,

so it's going to take me a second here. First, we want to thank David Kazubski. Kazubski. Kazubski. He wanted us to read his last name. We read it twice. Kazubski. I guess he doesn't mind being fired.

Congratulations, David, for being self-employed. We also want to mention all our other patrons, Dippin' Dot, Tony Stark, which is a fake name, by the way, Rex,

as opposed to Dippin' Dot, Cassie, Laura, Peggy, the future Mrs. Enright, Joshua, Tamara, Jake,

Steven, Matt, Jennifer, Maximilian, Measley, Eva, Dylan, Matt, Jennifer, Maximilian, Measley, Eva, Dylan, Eli, David, Elliot, Andrew, Stacy, Brandon, and Lisa. Thank you so much for your generous donations. You guys are the reasons Gloryhole Studios exists.

Remember, if you want to buy us a beer, buy us some wings, buy us a cup of coffee. The best way to do that is to go to Patreon.com. Give as little as a dollar a show. You get extra content, tons of extra content. And you get to buy us dinner every Thursday night. Yeah, which we need to hold us over to the next Thursday night. You know, just saying. It's the only meal I get out every week. I eat ramen the rest of the time.

Just letting you know. If you're not a patron, you're mean to us. Yes. That's what I'm saying. I agree. Hard agree. Hard agree. The show couldn't exist without our patrons, right?

And I really mean that. Like, if we run out of patrons, we can't do the show. So we don't have a place to do the show anymore. We don't have a studio anymore. We don't have a place to do the show anymore. So thank you very a studio anymore. We don't have a place to do the show anymore. So thank you very much. We kind of need this. Thank you very much.

Thank you guys. We love it. And if you're on the fence, now is a great time to give. We got a message from Jay, and Jay says, you know, you guys are talking about the jobs

that would be created against, created with renewable energy, but you, you know, and you bring up some great points, but he says, it's not true in the longterm. Only once a solar power

plant is up and running, jobs will decrease. And he's basically, it's not like talking about like how the miners, you know, there's miners for other stuff or drillers and stuff, and you don't need sunshine miners, he says, which I think is pretty funny. But I also, you have to maintain everything. It's not that you just put up a solar panel and you just hope that it always works. I mean, you have to maintain all the lines that go through. You always have to, you know, keep re-maintaining, like re-wiring things. Solar panels break. There's innovation that has to happen to create new and better solar panels. And I'm just talking about solar, not wind. I know those wind-powered things require great amount of maintenance as well as,

you know, putting them up is a lot of work and things like that. So I understand that there might not be an exact trade for jobs in the sense that there's an equal amount of jobs on both sides of the muffin. But there's still a lot of jobs, I think. I think there's a lot less unskilled jobs. Yeah, maybe you're right. I think that's part of it. It's like, I can get a degree in junior high school and then go mine, you know,

go work in a coal mine. It's not skilled labor. I'm not shitting. It's just not skilled labor. Sure. So the barrier for entry for that job is really low. The barrier for entry

for a guy who maintains the zappy zaps in the solar panel, like, that's probably higher. Zappy zaps. Do you get, that's probably higher. Zappy zaps. Is that a PhD in zappy zaps? You don't get crazy. It's not theoretical.

It's practical. It's not theoretical zappy zaps. Yeah. You can get a bachelor's in zappy zaptum and then that's fine. You can work your way up. I feel like you're holding your zappy zap nose up right now. Your little tassel looks like a lightning bolt. You have to get the Harry Potter scar.

You know? So we got a couple of messages last time, a while back. I don't know how many episodes that all blurs together at this point. But there was a Jim Baker piece where Jim Baker was talking about Trump has so many numbers.

He has so many numbers. And so James responded and he said, I think to what Cecil was referring to, in Genesis 17, God promised Abraham more descendants than can be numbered depending on the version you read. So, and he also says, by the way, Jim Baker can't be in the White House because you need to lack felonies.

That's super hilarious. We also got another message and I want to double check who this is from. Like a bridge over Ethel Waters. Which is awesome. Also said,

I don't think the numbers thing means what you think it means. They just think he has a majority. Yeah, right. So they're just saying, I have the numbers. I have the numbers. Not he has more numbers in the sense like he has a majority. Yeah, right. So they're just saying, I have the numbers. I have the numbers,

not he has more numbers in the sense like he has. Yeah, so he was just either misspeaking or he just meant it in a different way. So we really couldn't figure out what Jim Baker was talking about

last week. So we got an email from Zach. We occasionally get emails from people who are going to be in town for a few days and they want to pop over and check out the studio. The thing is, we'd love to accommodate that if we could, but we're really only in the studio one evening a week. The rest of the time, Cecil, you live somewhere else,

you work somewhere else. I live 40 some miles away. We're really only ever here one night a week to do our records, sometimes two nights or two days, if we have a live show or some other event that we're running. So we don't like have hours and it's, we'd love to meet all of you guys for a drink when you happen to be in town. Um, would that we could, but we typically can't. Um, so please don't take it personally. If we don't reach back out to you, we'd love to meet you, meet us at, uh, any of the events

that we travel to and meet up this this year we're hoping to do. Yeah. Hey, keep your calendars at this point open for the end of October. Because we will be doing something at the end of October. That's really the best way to do it. Otherwise, it's such a crapshoot. I don't know if we happen to be available

in that 15-minute window. It's just too hard to plan. Yeah, for sure. Got a message from FD and he said the RoboCop car ad was for the 6000 SUX, which is a direct dig on the epically terrible Pontiac 6000.

It was evidently FD's first car. But yeah, now that I remember it and it was the 6000 SUX and it got like three miles to the gallon or something. That's amazing. Someone sent in a joke. They said they have a Batman image and it says, what is it called when Batman leaves church early?

Christian Bale. That's pretty good. It is pretty funny. I like it. That's pretty good. That's pretty good. Thanks, Chris. I guess I'm saying hijab instead of hijab

or hijab instead of hijib. I like hijab better. I like the cut of your hijab. I think what I want to know is what's the right way to say it, but what's the best way? What is the best way to say it? Also, we fuck everything

up. We call it Mar-Sales around here, guys. It's Mar-Sales. So, we fuck everything up. We call it Mar-Sales around here, guys. It's Mar-Sales. So we fuck all different languages up. Don't mis-underestimate our predilection toward fucking things up. Don't you hold that against us.

So a bunch of people have sent this in or tweeted it at us. Evidently, This American Life 670 is about Alex Jones. Or part of it is about Alex Jones.

That's amazing. So I'm going to listen to this. I'm going to listen to that too. I'll listen to it this week and maybe next week we can even have a little tiny chat about it. Thank you, Christopher, for sending it in as well

as everybody else who tweeted at us. Got a message from Debra and Debra sent us a PDF that lists all the people in the Archdiocese of Illinois that are diddling. That were caught with diddling stuff. Okay, it's probably a short document.

It's pretty big. It's probably... Accused of sexual abuse in Chicago. How many pages are we talking here, Tom? Oh, we're up to 93 pages. Oh, we're still going. 115. Oh, we're still going.

154. Oh, we still got more. 181. 181. 181 pages worth of people who were caught diddling in Illinois. So, hey, that's something. That's just Illinois. It's just Illinois. It's a criminal organization.

It's a show me state. No, it's a different state. Different state. Different state. Different state. We're the land of Lincoln logs. That's what we're here for. So, we got a message from Brian, and Brian sent in this land of Lincoln Logs. That's what we're... So, we got

a message from Brian, and Brian sent in this clip of George Pell, the convicted abuser, George Pell. So, let me play this clip of George Pell in a debate with Dawkins. I remember when I was in England, we were preparing some young

English boys. They're from... Preparing them for... Come on. Thank you. Preparing them for First Communion. Oh, my God. The organization is a fucking farce.

Well, it's a farce because everybody's laughing at that. Everybody knows the answer. The punchline. Yeah, I know. Unreal. All right. Well, it's not funny. I'm convicted.

No kidding. So next week on Thursday, it's our great hope to do a short single story live stream that we're going to be doing. So if you're near your computer, nine-ish, ten-ish in the evening on Thursday, keep your eye on social media and on those

places like YouTube and such, and they'll be like, we'll let you know when we're going to go live 15 minutes early. We might even let you know an hour or two hours ahead of time when we know for sure we're going to go live. It really just depends on Ian's schedule because he's the one who winds the clock here. He presses the buttons

that make all this happen. He's the one. So we're hoping that that's going to happen on Thursday. And then the following Sunday, the 31st, we're going to be doing a live stream. And we're going to be doing about a half an hour or 20 minutes beforehand with the Discord people, patron only. And then we're going to be doing a live

stream. So set your calendars for the 31st. We're looking forward to that. That should be a lot of fun. 31st of March. We're going to be doing about an hour of live stream and hanging out. So be sure to check us out on those two live streams.

And that's going to wrap it up for this week. And we're going to leave you like we always do with the Skeptic's Creed. Credulity is not a virtue. It's fortune cookie cutter, mommy issue, hypno Babylon bullshit. Couched in scientician, double bubble, toil and trouble, pseudo quasi alternative, acupunctuating, pressurized, stereogram, pyramidal, free energy, healing, water downward spiral, brain dead pan, sales pitch, late night info docutainment. Leo, Pisces, cancer cures, detox, reflex, foot massage, death in towers, tarot cards, psychic healing, crystal balls, Bigfoot, Yeti, aliens, churches, mosques and synagogues, temples, dragons, giant worms, Atlantis, dolphins, truthers, birthers, witches,

wizards, vaccine nuts, shaman healers, evangelists, conspiracy, double-speak stigmata, nonsense. Expose your sides. Thrust your hands. Bloody, evidential, conclusive. Doubt even this. The opinions and information provided on this podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. All opinions are solely that of Glory Hole Studios, LLC. Cognitive dissonance makes no representations

as to accuracy, completeness, currentness, suitability, or validity of any information and will not be liable for any errors, damages, or butthurt arising from consumption. All information is provided on an as-is basis. No refunds. Produced in association with the local Dairy Council and viewers like you.