Cognitive Dissonance - Episode 488: Ethical Humanist Society of Chicago

Episode Date: September 23, 2019

Stories from the Week   Thank you to Glenda from the for joining us. Also check out

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This episode of Cognitive Dissonance is brought to you by our patrons. You fucking rock. Be advised that this show is not for children, the faint of heart, or the easily offended. The explicit tag is there for a reason. recording live from glory hole studios in chicago this is cognitive dissonance every episode we blast anyone who gets in our way we bring critical thinking skepticism and irreverence to any topic that makes the news makes it big or makes us mad. It's skeptical. It's political. And there is no welcome at.

This is episode 488. No matter what the notes say, Cecil. Yes, no matter what. So easy to find the notes when you label them properly. And later on, we will have Glenda in the studio. So that's going to be a good time.

Glenda is, she works at the Humanist Society here in Chicago. And so we're going to have her in studio later to chit-chat about humanism, what that means. It should be a good time.

It should. See, so I want to tell you a little story. Okay. I'm anxious. So this last week for my work, I had to go to a conference

slash retreat. I don't even know what you'd call it. A summit? Sure. Whatever the fuck you call it. Summit. Oh, yeah. You're important. So a summit. to a conference slash retreat. I don't even know what you'd call it. A summit? Whatever the fuck you'd call it. Oh, yeah. You're important. It's not really a retreat. It doesn't matter. It's a summit. I went to a summit.

And so it's just like two or three days of meetings and then you have dinner and drinks and then you have to stay overnight there and it's terrible. So I had to go and we went to this place called Lake Geneva. So if you're not from the Chicago area, what Lake Geneva is, is a big ass goddamn lake where all the rich people in Chicago park their boats and buy houses they don't use. And then ski in the winter. Right. Because there's a tiny, tiny hill.

Yeah. There's like a mound of dirt yeah like a construction site exactly yeah and they're like let's ski on it yeah that's what they do it's fucking insane because we're in the middle of nowhere and the moment there's 15 feet of elevations everyone's like like barely able to climb the hill like whoa dude i'm trying some fresh powder up here on this. They even have one of those things. They even have one of those things. Do they really?

They do. They have one of those ski lift things. They do. In Wisconsin? In Wisconsin. And it goes up. I'm not even kidding when I say it goes up maybe 35 feet. Well, to be fair, with the amount of cheese curds available to you in Wisconsin.

It's hilarious. Well, yeah, there's no way. There's no way a Wisconsinite could walk that. I will say this too. I kind of love Wisconsin because I'm a walk in six and a half or seven, but I go to Wisconsin. I'm a fucking Wisconsin 10.

You're a fucking, you're a Spinal Tap 11. Are you kidding me? You're just like, oh, which way to the gun show? It's like ridiculous when you get out there. Oh, yeah. You got a fucking armadillo

down your trousers up there. Are you kidding me? Although the only options would be Wisconsin talent options. It's a nightmare no matter what. I take it all back. Sure, yeah. Yeah, no amount of sweaters

can hide that horror. And I wore six. I wore six sweaters. You just keep pulling the sweaters off. You're like a Russian nesting doll with a Wisconsin sweater. Exactly. So we go up there.

And one of the things that we did on the second evening is we took a private boat tour of Lake Geneva. So Lake Geneva is way bigger than I thought it was going to be. Yeah, it is pretty big. It is big. Massively bigger than I thought it was going to be. It's big. The pants hide it well. But the thing that struck me is like we're going and this this guy you know it's like drinks on this boat and like you know we're all standing sitting and

you know watching the lake go by and uh the captain guide guy is on his little talky mic and there's like 12 of us right i don't know all the book terms I don't know all the book terms for anything you just said the captain guy is on his talky mic okay so anyway you continue he's giving us the lowdown on what we're looking at right water and I thought to myself

so this house you know this stretch of homes oh god kill me this stretch of homes like a mile stretch used to be owned by the Wrigley family. Who fucking cares? Well, hold on a second. And then we're looking, and Cecil, like, I will say that outside of, like, some of the mansions, like the Roosevelt mansion,

like, these are some of the biggest, most palatial homes on the lake that I've ever seen. Okay, sure. Okay. They're amazing. They're grand in scope, right? And they're beautiful. And he said, 95% of these homes are occupied less than two weeks out of the year. These are a lot. So, of course, I have to look, right?

So, I take a look. And a lakefront lot is several million dollars. Just the lot without anything built on it. Most of these homes are unoccupied 50 weeks of the year. I'm on this boat with all these people, like 12 of us, right? And we're on, and they're like, I want to get one of these too and be super rich.

And I'm just like, this is disgusting. Bernie Sanders would have a heart attack right now. All I'm thinking is like, in my mind, there's a part of me that's apoplectic with rage at the wealth disparity that we are taking a tour of being on the wrong side of wealth disparity. Right. And like it, what it was, was like an aspirational masturbatory wealth tour. And I was just like, why are we doing this? You guys are all temporary, temporarily depressed millionaires, Right. You're all just like, Oh, one day when I win the lottery,

I'm going to buy one of these houses. And then I won't invite any of you. That's exactly what it is. Like we paid a lot of money to look at what we don't have and wish we had it. And that's fucking the most American thing. That's amazing. Like we drank beer on a boat we paid for to look at things we don't have and covet them.

You can never own. God, you know what I mean? It was a coveting tour. Whenever I put a person's voice, though, to that, I always think of the guy from The Crow, who's like, here's a big goddamn guy and he shot all the dumb people.

Like, that's what I always think of that. Like, wacko guy who's like such a, like he's clearly mentally handicapped. He's just like, he did way too much meth. And he's just like, burn it, burn it,

burn it. Oh my gosh. Okay. So let me, let me, let me, let me try it. I got another story.

So I had a dream the other night. Oh my, just fucking that. Is it? That I, that I found someone's cell phone. I'm going to look at my phone. And then I woke up in the morning.

Yep. And I left the house and I left my cell phone at home all day. Then when I came back from outside from the day, I found a set of keys in the door outside coming in and I kept those keys. So I had found a phone the night before. I found a set of keys.

Right? Huh. Right? Huh? Right? Anyway. Well, here's the thing. Here's the thing though, Tom. Yeah. It's not going to be any more of a scam

than what we're about ready to talk about. This story is a long fucking article, and it's kind of worth the read. We have two really highly skeptical articles this week that were amazing. They're really good. I was really pleased to find. So, this article is from CNBC, and again, I didn't

have any idea that there was reasonably long-form journalism at CNBC. I know, yeah. Until I found this. It's got to be 10 pages long. Biohackers fell hard for a company selling hydrogen water, but many now say

the whole thing was a scam. What's a biohacker? Isn't that a butcher? No, it's actually this really cool game where you put this stuff on your hand and then you can like

shoot fire at the underwater Nazis or whatever they are whatever the best one of that is the third one bioshock infinite oh so good my son played it it's beautiful it's gorgeous and they're all like awful racists so you don't feel bad about killing any of them there's a scene i watched my son play it i remember there's like a scene where it's like we should stone there's like a black yeah they're gonna stone and kill like a white guy they're gonna kill it it's like, we should stone, there's like a black, like a black girl or like a white guy that they're getting married and it's like,

you have to make a choice. Like, do I want to side with the racists? And I was like, well, there's very fine people on both sides. Where's that option? I didn't know what to pick.

They have camera pans and it's just Trump standing there. Bioshock, I bet it's amazing. Anyway, this thing is about hydrogen water. And I already thought, I don't know a lot about water. But I already thought,

I don't know a lot about water. But I was thinking to myself, I was like, Well, I'm just a simple country chicken. Isn't there already twice as much hydrogen in water than anything else? Like, I think that if you change the amount of hydrogen, it's now not water, right?

Like if it's H3O, that's not water anymore. No, yeah. H3O is not water. It's something else. I think what they're talking about is dissolving. So you can dissolve gases into liquids. Sure, absolutely.

What they purport to have assembled is a machine that dissolves hydrogen into water so that you consume more hydrogen. Because we all know that a lot of our health problems are caused by a lack of consuming hydrogen. Every single time I go to the doctor, they slap a mask on me and give me a whole big dose of hydrogen. When's the last time you ever even heard anything except for hydrogen peroxide being used? Yeah, by the way,

H2O2. So different. You know what you're not full of? Enough blimps. Like that's... Like I'm already shaped like a Zeppelin. Yeah, I know shit, right?

I don't need that. I don't need to look like... But seriously, you don't go to the doctor and be like, yeah, I need my fucking daily dose of hydrogen or you pop your hydrogen pills.

Right. None of that stuff. They're just floating out of the bottle. They're trying to grab them out of the air. You take one of those Mylar balloons and you just puff it. You're just like. Yeah. Look at his set of seams.

Those are full of helium. Well, not anymore because you're fucking out of helium. Out of helium. Yeah. Not yet. What's soon? Can we do something like, and I know the answer is no, but I would like it if we could. Can we stop treating every fucking medical malady like a goddamn nutritional deficiency?

Yes. That does not insane. Cancer is not a fucking nutritional deficiency. Like, I understand maybe the impulse at its base level that like, if I put more things into the machine, that the machine will work better. But look, it's a big, complicated machine. And if you don't understand that, watch like one season of House.

There's like lots of things that can go wrong. There's hundreds of dozens of things that can go wrong. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So like everything that goes wrong with you is not because you didn't eat enough selenium or zinc or hydrogen or fucking carbon dioxide like whatever like stop stop it's not a nutritional deficiency sometimes the machine doesn't work good because other stuff well you know a while back you and

i were having a conversation because people that we knew were like all you got to do is drink one little cap full apple cider vinegar every day and like remove all you got to do is drink one little capful of apple cider vinegar every day and it'll like remove all the calcium from all your arthritic joints. Right. I remember that. First off, I don't even know if arthritis is caused by any of that stuff. I don't know. Period. But even if it was, your comment to me when they said it after we left, it was just like,

yeah, but just because you eat something doesn't mean it just immediately like disperses into your body. Like, like, like it's not like sperm in an egg, right? We're just like, yeah, swimming upstream. I'm going to go get in there. It's none of that shit. It's not a mushy, it's a closed system. Exactly.

All your systems are closed. You don't just like eat apple cider vinegar and then your body's like, oh, is that apple cider vinegar? Open the gates. It's like, what kind of vinegar is it? Apple cider? Oh, it's a different acidic acid.

Yeah. But it's like, you know, people see this stuff. And like you say, cancer, especially cancer is the worst when it comes to this stuff, because people immediately think,

well, all I have to do is eat my vegetables, eat my one apple a day, and I'm going to be okay. And I'm going to be, and I can get rid of this cancer. All I have to do is juice or all I have to do is alkaline diet. Exactly.

Like stop, stop. Like, yeah. Exactly. Like stop, stop. Like, yeah. Like that's like, just, just learn one time the basics of what cancer even is. And you realize like, it's not because you didn't put the right food in your tum tum.

Yep. Right. And it's like, or if it is, it's not going to get fixed because you put different food in the tum tum. Exactly.

Just because you ate bacon for your whole life and now you have colon cancer. Right. Doesn't mean you can eat Oh Oh, God, eat radishes! And just be like, time to eat some celery! It's like, no! Can't roll back to client. You can't turn back

time, Cher. Sorry, no matter what you do. You know? Alright, so this fucking machine is kind of amazing. Like, it's the scammiest... This scam had a scam attached to its scam. Scammy as fuck. This is scammy as fuck. So, this company, like scammy as fuck so they this company like so bio hackers let's talk about bio bio hackers are people that think they find some secret to how

your body works and that by doing this generally speaking that by doing one or two sort of like you didn't think it was possible kind of just. Just do this one simple, like, basically, if you treat your body like fucking msn.com clickbait, like, just do this one simple trick, and the IRS gets on with you. That's exactly it, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, biohackers believe that shit. Or if you sleep five hours and 21 minutes

instead of six hours, you'll be tricking your body into growing wings, you know, like all this crazy shit. You hear, and it's not just one thing. It's a dozen things, right? Like you say, sleep or, you know, like all this crazy shit. You hear, and it's not just one thing, it's a dozen things, right? Like you say, sleep or,

you know, food or those types of things, exercise. There's all these people who say like, like, do you remember the P90X, the muscle confusion thing?

Do you remember this? We're just like, your muscles are like, I don't know what he's doing, but better get bigger and stronger. You're just like, yeah, like it's just hard work. That's all it is. You do and stronger. You're just like, yeah, like it's just the hard work.

It's just hard work. That's all it is. You do hard work. The muscles are like, we need more of that. You did nothing different than what anybody else in the history of mankind

to grow muscles has done. But you called it something catchy. Right. And that's what this is, right? This is one of those bullshit jade egg garbage goop things. Right.

And they call it something, they're like, oh, it's hydrogen water. Dude, it's hydrogen water. What hydrogen? Do you remember when like super duper oxygenated water was like the thing a few years back? I don't.

Was it? Oh, that's probably not good for you because you don't want- They don't think triple oxygenated the water or whatever? You probably don't want that. Isn't that hydrogen peroxide? Well, I think if they just dissolve more oxygen instead of like-

I see what you mean. Change it. Yeah, yeah, change it. And more oxygen instead of like- I see what you mean. Change it. Yeah, yeah, change it. And then they're like, that's like a free radical. That's what I was saying. It's a free radical.

It's not great. Yeah, but that was like a thing for a hot minute. We do things like called antioxidants rather than oxidants. So then if I do that and then eat like a thousand acai berries right afterwards, you're just like anti-matter and matter

like joining up. You're like eating a plum. You're constantly shoving plums in your mouth. Alright, here's the diet season. What you do is you take a shot glass of baking soda and a shot glass of vinegar. And then have them fight it out of your stomach. Whichever one wins

Human Science Fair I wonder if anybody's ever tried to down that stuff and then like they throw up because it's... 100% YouTube has. There's a 100% chance right now that somebody on YouTube. Because I have had like an acid stomach or whatever. And I've drank like baking soda. Yeah.

So and that's all that plop plop fizz fizz shit is. Oh, yeah. That's all it is. It's just, you know, it's just a base and you just cancel it out. So I know that you can do that. So, yeah. And you can drink vinegar. You could do that

and just feel bad. And it's like, your tum-tum's all grumbly. Can you imagine what that would be? You're just grumbly for hours. It's like, brr, brr, brr, brr, brr, brr, brr, brr, brr, brr, brr. You just look over at your wife like,

I'm getting a hotel. Your stomach turns into the fire swamp from Princess Bride. She's like... You sound like one of the bucket boys on fucking Michigan Avenue. I'm sleeping outside for a while. I don't want you to see me like this.

I made my pants. I need new pants. So this guy sells these machines. Yeah. They're hydrogen water machines. It's a soda stream with hydrogen. I know. But the thing is that they sell these things

and they tap into your regular water. Well, the amount of shit that you have to do in order... So what they want you to do is they want you to install one of these and then become an influencer, right? So use your social media power to go and say how great hydrogen water is.

And so you have to out of pocket, huge red flag, get a $10,000 loan. So much money. Huge red flag. Huge red flag get a $10,000 so much money huge red flag huge red flag by the way if anybody would like to

sign on for our cognitive dissonance hydrogen water you know what no we just we want you to be influencers and if you pay us

$10,000 we will be influenced I'm just being honest I'll be super fucking influenced you can pick a story you can pick my nose it's $10,000

but anyway these people huge red flag you gotta you gotta shell out 10 grand once you do and your posts

start getting like a lot of a lot of likes and a lot of stuff like that and not even not like not even

I don't even think they had metrics like this. It basically just said post a few times. And as you post, we'll pay you money. Right. So we will give you X amount of dollars for, it's like 300 bucks or something like that for this,

this, for your payment. So your payment, we're going to pay it off for you. Right. You just have to be out of pocket initially. And anytime you're the one out of pocket right away, all right, we're not selling it to you.

You can't afford not to do this, but you do have to take out a five-figure loan in order to do this. Could you imagine, like, you know, if you're talking to these people, and I don't want to bash on the people who got tricked by this, right? Because it's not their fault.

But if you ever hear anybody say, I have this product and I want you to have it for free, but you have to buy it from me and then I'll pay you back. That is the, I will gladly pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today of hydrogen water.

Now, run, first off, run screaming from hydrogen water in general, but also run screaming from anything that seems like that, right? This is like a multi-level marketing scam. Look, if you got to buy the fucking crate of sex toys before you can have your sex toy party, if you got to buy the fucking $2,000 vacuum before you're allowed to sell $2,000 vacuums, I've sold a lot of shit in my life. I've never bought the thing in order to sell the thing. shit in my life, I've never bought the thing in order to sell the thing. The company I work for owns the things I sell if it's a legitimate company. And then I'm like, I can sell that.

And they're like, cool, we'll pay you if you do. And I'm like, great, start writing checks. Because you're not a retailer, right? What they do is they try to turn everybody into a retailer because they want it off their desk and they want the money from it. And so what they do is they turn you into a retailer and now you're on the hook for it. You're the one who has all the risk for it. Not the company wants to sell Avon or whatever marketing, whatever marketing garbage thing they want to hit you up with this week. You know, last, just last week, just last week, my wife comes in and she's like, so this guy went to high school with, and I was like, okay. And she's like, yeah, I'm on Facebook.

And he sent me a message and I was like, okay. And she's like, yeah, he's like, yeah. Hey, Sarah, love your art. By the way, I have this brand new opportunity that I, cause that's how they reach you. You know, that's how they go after you is these big, you know, they go on their own social media and they just send mass emails to everybody

that they can to be like, hey, just so you know, I'm in on the ground floor, this amazing opportunity. And then they try to sell you fucking Avon or what? And I don't even know all of these, right? Nutra,

Nutra, whatever blender. I don't know, but there's a bunch of these out there. Anytime. It's so good. You can't buy it in stores. Exactly.

Like stop and say that out loud. Oh my God. It's so good. I can't buy it. Well, I should get two of them then. Defense, defense. Are you kidding me? But, but, and they also do this with jobs.

Have you ever heard about this with jobs where you'll go into like a job or like try to hire you and be like, yeah, all you have to do is just pay for the training. And then you have the job and you're like, wait a minute. Yeah. If you want me to do the job,

you'll just train me. Right. But instead they're trying, it's just a marketing garbage scam. Right. That's all it is. And in particular, these people own the thing. Right. They own the thing and be like, here you go.

I have this thing, but you got to pay me 10 grand for it. Are you kidding me right now? You have to pay me $10,000 for the privilege of advertising this for me. What the fuck is that? But the worst part is, and I don't, again, I don't want to make fun of these people because these people are sick. Yeah. Right. That's why they're doing it. They're not doing it because they're, because they, they have a choice. They, they're very sick people and they think that this might be the one thing that can help them. That's why they're doing it. Yeah. Because if you've already feel great, like you're not going to be like, well, maybe I'll just dissolve some more

whatever particles. Yeah, exactly. Put some argon in my water. Like, what? Oh, it's gallium infused water. It's so,

I'm dead. Yeah, but it's, it's a, it's a horrible scam and they're preying on the most vulnerable. And the machines

get all moldy. That's the worst part. It's shitty. Well, the machines are garbage, right? So they're preying on the most vulnerable. And the machines get all moldy. That's the worst part. The machines are garbage, right? So they're terrible. They get moldy. Then they start telling people there's a ton of conditions on how you get your money back. And then they start telling people it's your fault that the machine's fucked up. You can't put in tap water. You have to put in distilled water. And they're just like, well, you didn't say that when I bought the fucking thing. And you have to like buy a bunch of distilled water. Or you have to like distill your own water. Distill your own water is amazing.

What a great machine. Well, for $10,000, you can get this thing hooked up that'll distill the water at home. Oh, I should buy that too. Well, the company, now a couple of good things coming out of this. One of the companies that did the loans is trying to work with people to be like, hey, this is clearly a scam. We didn't know we were in a scam. Right.

This is what they're saying nowadays, right? They certainly gave a lot of these loans out before. And then they- Yeah, probably didn't know what the product was. Yeah, maybe, maybe. You know what I mean? You never know. Now they're saying, we're in on your side.

Some of these people are going to the government to be like, hey, you've got to help me in some way. Please help me because I can't get... One person left 50 messages in like two weeks time just to try to get somebody to talk to them. I mean, these are absolute scam artists. They're out there trying to steal money from people and lie to them.

First off, lie to them about a bogus product, sell them a bogus product, sell them a bogus machine, and then do it on credit. It's like when I was driving to the studio today, I can't tell you how many signs I passed where it was like, be your own boss, real estate apprentice needed, make $10,000 a month by calling this number on this like cardboard sign glued to a tree. I'm like, nobody making 10 grand a month. Nobody who's like, I could definitely, I've got a $10,000 I could pay to an assistant. Yeah.

The way I'm going to find them is by gluing a cardboard sign to a tree. Like, think about nobody is going to pay you to post something on your Instagram unless you're a Kardashian. Yeah. Right? Like,

if you're just like a normal person, it's pennies, pennies, pennies. And even a Kardashian, all they're going to get is like an invite to the Fyre Festival. That's all they're going to get.

Right. Like, if your following is huge, like, yeah, will you maybe get a free shirt or something? Like, yeah, wear this shirt and, like, go to a cool place. Fine. But they send you the shirt.

Yeah. If it's like, buy this shirt and I'll buy it back for you. Yeah. We can buy it back. Best case scenario, I didn't do anything at all. Exactly, right? What is happening right now? And then right now, even if they followed through,

even if they followed through and paid all those payments to you, you still have a machine that doesn't work. It's the crystal of truth. Yes. Isn't it lovely? No. What are you doing?

Just a little experiment. It's falling! Don't fear him. Don't fight. Give. Give the crystal your fear, your love, your secrets. Give the crystal everything. Give it your very... So this article is from The Guardian. This article surprised me because I actually thought that this was over now or mostly winding down. But I guess it's heating back up. This is called Dark Crystals,

the brooding reality behind a booming wellness craze. So like, I kind of remember when crystals were like, like healing crystals were a big deal, maybe 20, 25 years ago. I mean, it's been a long time. It was in the nineties when it was like, rub this rose quartz on your nuts to be more fertile or like fucking whatever that, oh, you haveational energy and these rocks touch your rocks right yeah we'll make your boobs grow bigger like whatever but i guess it's bad i guess it's bigger than ever like this article was kind of amazing so the the market for crystals in general has grown to like gargantuan, crazy proportions. Yeah. And people have a host,

like a myriad of crazy beliefs around like what these shiny rocks will do. Yeah. Generally relating to like some kind of vibrational energy thing. Yeah. That kind of seems to be the one unifying nonsense. None of these people could explain it to you. No.

No, they wouldn't be able to. No. Or you can't. The problem is the only problem with vibrational energy mathematics around crystals is that you can't see it, measure it, explain it. Sure. Yeah. It's a dragon in your garage. Right. Yeah, that's basically what it is. Yeah, so there's no way to

tell anybody. Yeah, you can't explain it. But appallingly also, like, the market for really rare crystals is booming. Yeah. Is going up. And, like, when you have, like, really rare commodities is booming, is going up. And when you have really rare commodities, and then you incentivize those things, and then the value of those things goes up, these things are oftentimes found in countries where it's like, cool, that fucking thing that's hard to get to that there's very little of is worth a lot of money now. I bet a kid could dig

it out of there. And communities are. Yeah. You know, like, and, and communities are being like, basically we're creating situations where like poor people are being absolutely undermined. Yeah. Completely exploited. By their minds. Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. Exactly. Undermined. I like that. But you know, one of the things that they do is they don't ever pass that money on to the person. They're making an insane amount of money and they want to blame everybody on the chain. There's a portion of this where some hippie dippy dude comes in to try to buy a crystal or there's a story of one. He comes in and he's like, and they say, how much is that crystal? He says, 20 bucks. And he's like, I'll give you five. And you're like, and then he's like, well, it's basically his fault that I can't

pay more for these crystals. And that's why those people don't make a lot of money. And it're like, and then he's like, well, it's basically his fault that I can't pay more for these crystals. And that's why those people don't make a lot of money. And it's like, no, there's a price for it, right? If there's not a market for it, there's not a market for it. But these people are practically killing themselves for pennies on the dollar. They're in awful conditions in mines so deep that they can't get oxygen.

That shit is insane. They're deep enough where the mines collapse. They get injured constantly because they're basically mining stone, which is sharp. They don deep enough where the mines collapse. They get injured constantly because they're basically mining stone, which is sharp. They don't have the regular tools for it. So they're getting injured doing this work. And then we're paying them literally pennies on the dollar so that we can take those things and bring them here

and sell them at crystal shows to people. I was watching a show the other day. It was a show on one of these stations. I don't know, maybe E, I'm not sure. It's called Dating No Filter. Okay. And it's a show where someone dates, they go out on a date and they film the whole thing.

And then two comedians basically riff on the date. And it's actually funny. It's actually a really funny show. I would hate that so much. Yeah, right. Of course you would. And who wouldn't, right? But everybody on there is an attention whore,

so they love it. But you know, like, well, the people from LA, they show up and the girl brings a gift to the guy and it's a rose quartz. And she pulls it out. She's like, I got a gift for you. And she opens her hand. He's like, is it rose quartz?

And so like, I think, and I don't know if you remember this, but when we were talking, I want to say it was to, maybe it was to Megan or it was to Esme. I don't remember who it was, but they were saying like, I think, and I don't know if you remember this, but when we were talking, I want to say it was to, maybe it was to Megan or it was to Esme. I don't remember who it was, but they were saying like that crystal shit is still huge in California.

I thought that had died down. It's still happening like crazy in California. I'm pretty sure it was Megan who was telling us about this. Yeah, I think so. Who was like, yeah, it just happens all the time out here and it's just constant. And so this sort of thing, there's a huge market for it. And they have these giant crystal showcase fucking expos

where people bring in, they ship in all this stuff and they sell immense amounts of these. They're saying the market for this is in the millions of dollars every year. I thought it was billions. Billions of dollars. Maybe it was billions. I thought it was hundreds of millions or billions,

but it's an immense amount of money. And these people are making, where somebody is going to sell a 40 or $50 crystal, they're making 40 cents off of it. That's just like there's and it's all just made up. Yeah. Like the value, like when you go to buy, when you go to buy a piece of like nice jewelry now, like almost all the jewelry that you buy, like will tell you like it's certified, like cruelty free type, you know, whatever. Not blood diamonds or whatever.

Yeah, exactly. tell you like it's certified like cruelty free you know whatever diamonds or whatever yeah i don't yeah exactly yeah and because like we've come to an understanding around gemstones that like we don't want to send people into horrifying conditions like we're done with that world yeah as much as like we can be and so like that that that demand has swung so that when you go to buy a nice piece of jewelry now, everything will tell you like this is certified to be evil free, like as much as is possible, right? And so you can buy that with something approaching a clear conscience. Right. I know that we will get email from people saying there are still problems with that. Yeah, yeah.

I do know that there are still problems with that. I saw that there was crazy. I do know that there are still problems. I saw that there was crazy. There was stuff that I've watched several videos where the people have said, I want to buy a cruelty free diamond. And they found that the certifications are fraudulent. So they're, they're certifying it or they're saying they're certifying it.

They're buying it from certain dealers and they're saying it is. And then they bought it from someone else who said it was. And so like, there's definitely some shit out there that is not, it's you're right. It's not the same. It's not a cruelty free. Right. So, but like, I's definitely some shit out there that is not, you're right. It's not the same. It's not a cruelty free. Right.

So, but like, you know, what needs to happen is if we're going to have this market for, again, pretty rocks that people have decided are worth something. Yeah, because they're, I mean, literally worth nothing. Right.

It has no, has no. It's just, it's just a static. Value on its own. Just a static value. It's just like, it's a pretty thing that we've decided we'd like. Yeah. I actually don't care. No, that's fine. It's fine. I like pretty things. Sure, sure. It's fine a static value. It's just like, it's a pretty thing that we've decided we'd like. Yeah. I actually don't care.

No, that's fine. It's fine. I like pretty things. Sure. Sure. It's fine. Yeah.

We have to get to the point in the marketplace where we demand some kind of cruelty free certification. Like if you're buying something and just think about like, think hippies. Like if you're buying something that like make you fucking feel at peace inside, like some fucking Serenity Now crystal. Yeah. Like how could you have a Serenity Now crystal

that like just came out of a mine that like buried a toddler? Sure, sure. You can't have that. Like it would be tainted with the evil fate and spirits of the diggers or whatever. Exactly, yeah. It's not just crystals though, right?

Like Nestle and all these other chocolate companies, they get children to do work in countries for cocoa. They do the palm oil, which is like one of the big ingredients in chocolates is forced labor. We're talking slavery at this point. And I remember hearing, or at least seeing, and again, I think it was a meme,

so I can't find the story right now, but it said something like Nestle was going to have a hard time not giving, you know, not using slave labor based on this because it was going to be hard for them to do. And even in this, in one of the articles that we just read, the article basically says that they, they're like, yeah, we'll abide by it according to the timeline.

They didn't say, they were like, no more slavery. They were just like, yeah, we'll abide by it according to the timeline. They didn't say they were like, no more slavery. They were just like, well, don't worry. We'll transition out of it is what they basically said. Transition out of slave labor. Yeah. And that's what, I mean, I'm not kidding, right? That's what we just read, right? Was what they said. I know. So they did, their CEO said something like, don't worry, we're going to transition out of it during the timeline that they suggest. So, you know, the thing is, don't worry, we're going to transition out of it during the timeline that they suggest. So, you know, the thing is,

there's a lot of products that do this. There's a lot of products that have this. And you can't even switch over to Willy Wonka because they've got the Oompa Loompa and squirrel problem. Oh, the squirrel problem there, yeah. You know what you need is you need one of those people from like those animal liberation fronts blowing up Willy Wonka's

place because of the squirrel labor. But seriously, this is- What about the child abuse too? Like you can't, these kids blow up like balloons in there. You should see what they have. You should see what Nestle has those kids doing. No, but seriously,

like this is what our world is. We've exploited, we exploit people, you know, the richest of our world. And we're part of that. Oh, for sure. Exploit the rest of the world yeah all the time you know what was what is it with the computer boards there's some sort of what's the cobalt yeah cobalt mining and it's and it's horrid it's it's horrid and it's in all the technology that

we have like all the really high-end technology that you're like look at this new thing it does the womb and it's got the touch and it does a biggie do. And you're like, look at how amazing it is. My Tesla is basically made a cobalt, you know, but like people, people are like horribly abused in those places. And so it's just one of those things that we do. There's no, there's no way to cruelty free life. There's no cruelty free life you can live and consume in America. But to some degree, what you can do is expose, like, because like I, and I recognize that, and like one of the problems I have is that like I feel crushed by the inability to make

ethical choices, especially with my dollar. I feel crushed by that. Me too, me too. But one thing we can do is we can like, when there are options, we can exclusively buy those options. And tell everybody about it. Yeah, be squeaky. Because it has changed the diamond industry. It has changed the gemstone industry.

There are things you can do. People will, when given options, people will spend more money to buy something that doesn't stink like child blood. Yeah. Because that stuff is hard to wash off and you got to use cold water. Yeah.

It's a whole thing. And what's weird is you use tied child blood to get the child blood off. Where they squeeze, they freshly squeeze the children. It's just a never-ending circle. But there are economic incentives that do work.

Yeah. Guess all I got to really say is that I'm gay, black, a furry, pretty much everything I'm a publican hates, and the best esports player

of the whole year, I guess. Thank you so much. So this story comes from Right Wing Watch. And I love this story just because it's amazing. So furry convention shows Milo Yiannopoulos the door. Yeah. So everything is coming up shit for Milo. Absolutely.

And I think it's terrific. Yeah. And he's been banned from the everythings. He tried to like lead the straight pride parade, even though he's a gay dude. Like that didn't work. That was weird. It's weird.

He's weird. Everybody hates him. And I love when provocateurs, like everybody just kind of turns on him because it's like your whole thing was turning on people. Yeah. That was, you were trying to cash in on the mean spiritedness of the online were trying to cash in on the mean-spiritedness

of the online world and to pull that into the real world. And what you find is that when you pull that into the real world, everybody dislikes that almost always.

So he's kind of persona non grata everywhere. He's got, he got kicked, he got banned from Australia. Yeah, they completely banned him from Australia.

They said, can't come here. Yeah. Yeah. Character defect. He can't come to Australia at all. Went a whole country? Yeah.

But just founded by convicts? Yeah. That's what I was going to say. Founded by criminals. Yeah. It's just like, yeah, not you. Yeah. We're full of bogans and you can't come here.

You can't be here. Get the fuck. Yeah. Can't sit with us. So like on his like, whatever social media that's still left to him, like WeTweet or something like, I don't even know what it's called. It's something nobody uses. He said he's going to the Midwest Furries

Convention. Yeah, the Furfest. And the Furfest people were like, wait a minute. If there's something about furries, it's we are an inclusive, non-judgmental group of people. You ain't welcome. We aren't having somebody who's made their entire livelihood on being a judgmental dick

coming to the fucking furry convention. And they fucking booted them out. Yeah, they kicked them out. And I know some people going to this. So I have friends who are going to this. And they had said, they were initially really happy that this happened. But then one of them posted to Facebook.

And again, I don't know how true this is, but one of them posted to Facebook that the Proud Boys are now going to show up and maybe protest or go in. You're going to ruin these guys' good time? Yeah, right. So you're going to ruin these people's good time. They're going there to have a good time and they're going to go there and be judgmental pricks about it. So he's picked another marginalized group to go after and then attack. That's what he's decided to do. Yeah. Like when you have to go after, like when you're like, you know, I'm going to fight,

I'm going to fight people who want to like do a dress up convention. Yeah. That's who I want to like give shit to. It's like, what are you doing?

Like, don't you have better things to do with your time? Is this the big, like anybody who confuses these assholes with like big issues, like important things,

like free speech and you know, none of that. Yeah. They're just looking to pick on somebody. and they're out of targets at that like they've they've already lost fighting all the targets that that have power right so they're like your point like they're fighting the more margin they're trying to find as a least amount of power as a group as small that's what i want that's who i want to fight because i'm a fucking coward yeah that's exactly it and and he's been he's been a shitty person since the beginning.

Since the very beginning, Milo has been a shitty person. He coaxed his fans to attack people on Twitter and got kicked off for it. He's been kicked off of dozens of places. In fact, one of the things that happened, I want to say a while back on Facebook or something, he posted a bunch of, like a bar bill that he had for like five grand. And he got into a huge, you know, just trying to, he's just trying to show people like how rich he was. And everybody was just like, what the fuck? Like, you know, like we're not that rich, basically.

It doesn't matter what he does. And it's because, you know, when you're a shitty person, people treat you like a shitty person. And that's what he is., when you're a shitty person, people treat you like a shitty person. And that's what he is. He's just a genuinely shitty douchebag dude. A guy who gives no grace, receives no grace, none whatsoever. Yeah. So doctor, what is the ocean? Okay. The ocean is the vast body of salt water that occupies three fourths of our planet. That's way too much. No, that's actually fine. But the water levels are rising. Because of how many fish there are?

No, the fish are actually dying. They're drowning. No, the problem is pollution. Pollution is causing the marine habitats to be destroyed and the water levels to rise. Ugh, I'm starving. At that point, I thought I'd learned it all.

This story comes from Right Wing Watch. This is Jim Baker. Talk of, this, talk of climate change is an effort to pretend the end days aren't upon us. Like,

I can't even do any of that. Two letters away from yes. I can't figure it out. Did you see, Greta Thornberger is her name? Yeah. Killing it right now.

Where she just drops, she's like, yeah, so here's what I'm going to do. I'm not making a statement. I'm just going to give you guys a climate report from 2018.

How about you read it? That's my statement. You know? I like what she said. She's like, don't tell me how impressed you are with Sweden. It's a bunch of empty words

that mean nothing if you don't do any work attached to it. Yeah, yeah. She is a mic drop in. You know, and the thing is, is like, what's funny is I saw that video and then I read the comments and there's so many people out there

that think climate change is a hoax, that think it's not real. And I'm just like, like there's part of me that when we're standing on the last bit of land, watching the water fall, I want those people to still be alive so I can drown them. Yeah. Like, I want that person to still be there and be like, climate change is a hoax. So I could just be like, get your face underwater forever.

I am baffled by anybody who's still on the fence. Not even on the fence. Like, they're completely denial. Right. It's, that's insane. Not even on the fence. They're completely denial. Right. That's insane. You're a crazy person now. Do you not understand how numbers and science work?

At this point, this is not a contestable... Even beyond all that, we as lay people can now see things happening. Yeah. Right? I can sort of sympathize

when it was this kind of theoretical thing that's happening, but your life doesn't seem any different, so it's kind of abstract. Yeah. But it's not abstract anymore.

Yeah. Like, you know, if you think, if you think back to, like, your life and what that looks like, and you can look at maps and see, like,

what were your summers like as a kid? What are your summers like now? They're different. They're different. It's not your imagination that it feels different. This year in Chicago on the lakefront, there is a spot on the lakefront. It's a long spot along Lakeshore Drive. And it starts right at the Field Museum and it ends, the spot ends right before Navy Pier. So actually a little bit closer than that. So actually probably like around Grand Avenue it ends. So it's about maybe 15 blocks long. And along

the lake there is a platform that traditionally my entire life has been dry. It's a dry platform. The water is normally about a foot below this and people fish off of it. They sit on it and fish off of it. And there's two platforms there. There's a lower platform and then there's a higher platform. The higher platform is the lakefront trail.

And the lower platform is the old lakefront trail that's now just a platform where it was underwater the entire year this year. It was underwater the entire year. It's never in my entire life been underwater the entire year. There's over, they were saying some several trillion gallons worth of water in the lake this year, more than there always, than there has been ever. And it's, and you've just got to think about it in that terms. You're just like, there's water level rise in Lake Michigan for a full year. It's been flooded for an entire year. There hasn't been a, it's not been dry on that entire stretch of land. And it's a foot

taller. The effects are not in your imagination anymore. They're not things that you can't notice. It's like, man, there just seems to be a lot more hurricanes. They're bigger because they're just are. And like, your summers seem more extreme and your winters seem more extreme and your droughts seem to be less.

None of that's your imagination. In the, in the Midwest, our summers are not more extreme are in the, in the Midwest. Our summers are way more mild than they ever were growing up. I remember growing up. It was 90 degrees all the time in the Midwest.

The Midwest got hot as fuck every year. It was hot as shit every year. And for the past 10 years, it has been hot as fuck every year. It was hot as shit every year. And for the past 10 years, it has been mild as hell. Like mild, completely mild. We get 70 degrees, 80 degrees. I wake up in the morning and it's, you know, 67, 73 there. And it stays. That's not the summer you remember. That's not the summer I remember from growing up. Not at all. Not in the middle of August. I certainly don't remember that. And so that's been, it's the same thing. And it's been for years. It's been like that.

It hasn't, that's not just one thing. And then the winter comes and it's absolutely brutal. Like, like, like crazy. Absolutely brutal. When you were a kid, how many times did school get canceled? Cause it was too cold to go to school. One time. Never that I remember. Yeah. One time when I was a kid. Yeah. So like very, like in the last three or four years? How many times? A couple times, three, four times. I mean like four or five times.

Well, for me, and my, the higher ed institution I worked for never closes. Right. So when they close, it's a big deal. But yeah,

school closes all the time for cold temperatures now. The world is demonstrably different now. And I think part of that is that we're like, we give a shit how, like the outcomes of children and ways we didn't in the 80s.

That's possible, very possible. There are some changes in how we think about that. But like, yeah, so I want to recognize that. But I read an interesting article. It said like, you can click on where you grew up and then what year you were born. And it would tell you the amount of change that your area has experienced.

And different parts of the country and different parts of the world have experienced more dramatic shifts. In the Midwest, the shifts that we've experienced have been actually relatively moderate. They're mineral. They're mineral, yeah. But that's not true of the southeastern portion

of the United States. And it's amazing to hear out of the same set of mouths, man, when I grew up, it was like this and like that. And there's an acknowledgement acknowledgement an anecdotal acknowledgement that the world is different now than it used to be and yet still a refusal by those same mouths to accept climate change it's like you guys don't believe in science you don't even believe in your own anecdotes yeah what do you believe yeah yeah Yeah, yeah, yeah. So this is Jim from his show. Odd judgment is coming. Just as his word said,

it would come in the last days. Do you understand? Why is man so livid about global warming? Because it's probably going to kill us all or it's going to kill a good significant portion of us. That's why. Yeah, right.

I'm upset about things that are generally apocalyptic in nature. Exactly, yeah. I would be in the same position if somebody said there's a fucking zombie virus. Right, yeah. Or like, I think people were livid when the threat of nuclear exchange was a real and looming moment. Like, people were like, I don't want to die of bombs. Yeah, if there was a fucking smallpox like, I don't want to die of bombs. Yeah. If there was a fucking smallpox outbreak,

I'd be livid too. Yeah, I'd be like, there's all kinds of things I'm willing to get upset about. Especially if someone, while people were dying around them with smallpox, said there was not a smallpox. Right.

Then I would be livid. I would be livid at that person because you're a fucking idiot. Because all the signs around, it'd be like somebody being like, man, there's nothing to worry about nuclear stuff. And then their face melting off. Dude, it's the fucking Black Knight from Monty Python.

It is. It's just a flash round. Exactly. Like your arm is off. No, it isn't. Why? Why do you think people in america they do you know what they want to have people arrested yes that don't believe that global warming is what they're saying what the fuck are you talking

about that's literally made up what the fuck are you talking about you know what i want i want people that don't believe in global warming not to have public positions right but that's not arrested yeah right? I want people that are in power of large corporations to also not deny global warming because they have a huge impact on the climate. I want them to not do it

and I want them to publicly say there is climate change. And if not, I want their company to go bankrupt. That's not being arrested. That's a market solution. Yeah, right. That's the invisible hand, right?

Fuck you. Yeah. That's what we want as free market capitalists. I hope the invisible hand drowns you in the fucking Lake Michigan that is overflowing right now. It is. Do you understand me? Wake up everybody. Yes. Listen to me. This is really, really important what I'm trying to tell you. Annihilist. What the fuck does that have to do with anything? If you were a nihilist, you wouldn't give a shit about the destruction of the earth.

You wouldn't want anybody to be right. You wouldn't care. Right. Do you not know what that word is? No, I was sorry. I just wanted to say a scary word. Anytime people are crazy,

insane, angry, and can't forgive, go crazy over something, you better find out what is the root of that. See, they don't even know why they're so upset over global warming. And yet I've studied global warming. Oh, you've studied. Jim fucking Baker has studied global warming. And yet I've studied global warming. Oh, you've studied. Jim fucking Baker has studied global warming. I love these motherfuckers like, well, I'm an amateur paleontologist.

Fuck you. Get the fuck out of here. You know who studied global warming? Climatologists. The rest of you have not done it. You don't have the requisite fucking education and expertise to dig deep into these fucking complex fields as a layperson.

Reading a handful of scientific American articles does not make you scientifically literate. Reading and science together does not make you scientifically literate. And we've had periods of warming before. But here's the thing. It's not been caused by fucking greenhouse gases in the past. here's the thing. God's... It's not been caused by fucking greenhouse gases in the past. That's the thing.

It's never... We've never had a period of warming like this ever. Yeah. You know? And also, I love the idea. It's like, well, one time I got shot,

so when I get shot again, it won't hurt. Yeah. Huh. Yeah. That doesn't actually make sense. That's a great way to put it, right?

There was once an ice age and a global extinction event caused by an asteroid so if that happens again we don't have to worry about it good dust your hands off we're fine wait what yeah says man says these storms and the things that are coming, God's going to send judgment. He already has. He's already begun. And you don't get it. You're going to get it on tomorrow. What the fuck does that mean? That series of sentences didn't mean anything.

Man says God's going to send these storms and the judgment is coming and you're going to get it. I get it. Charles Broadcast, if you listen to me. Because global warming is the world's excuse that God wasn't in the storm. What the fuck does that mean? Okay, I think I know where he's going. Okay, thank God. Somebody's going to explain this to me because fucking Jim can't. So there was a hurricane.

And there are people who know stuff who are like, hurricanes are caused by warm water. And there's more of that. So more hurricanes and Jim saying, nope, they're caused because Jesus is angry about babies. So don't say it's climate change because that means you'll kill a baby. Okay. For real. Yeah, no, that's, I think you kill a baby. Okay. For real. Yeah, no, that's, I think you're probably right. So he's saying,

he's saying you're choosing something that is not responsible for this thing. Yeah. And God is mad because he somehow made a natural phenomenon that everybody points to and says, that is a completely natural phenomenon that happens. And God's like, motherfucker, I'm right here.

Yeah, right. Can't you see me in this giant hurricane doing a natural thing that other people would completely mistake for a hurricane? What the fuck is wrong with you, humanity? I made this hurricane in my image. It's why it has an eye. I'm going to prove to you God's in the storm.

God's in the rain. That's fake applause. God's in the wind. That's fake applause. It's the fakeest applause. It's God's storm. It's God's wind. It's God's lightning.

Yeah, did you hear how it faded? Did you hear how that faded? That, listen, okay, I want everybody to listen. It's so fake. Listen to how this fades. You can tell that it's fake applause. It's 100% fake applause

added after the fact. Listen to how it fades. That's not how fake applause added after the fact. Listen to how it fades. That's not how applause actually fades in real life. So listen to how it fades. That's how applause fades on Pro Tools. That's not how it fades in real life. Or when it just gets quieter, but doesn't change. Yeah, but doesn't change. So listen. Yeah, the scope of it. God wasn't in the storm. I'm going to prove to you God's in the storm.

God's in the rain. God's in the wind. It's God's storm. It's God's wind. It's God's light. Do you hear how the intensity of the clapping doesn't stop? Right. It just quiets.

Well, everybody clap quieter. Yeah. Everybody all agrees at the same time. They all lock eyes and look at each other and be like, we're going quiet now. Right. Quiet. Here we go. Hey, hey. Hey the same time. They all lock eyes and look at each other and be like, we're going quiet now, right? Quiet. Here we go. Hey, hey. Same tempo. Not as hard with the handy bits.

We tried this for like 30 minutes before we started. Everybody start clapping. Okay. Alright, Jim, you're out of the clapping game. You can't even play the clapping game. Because that's how everybody claps. So we're joined by Glenda Kenyon from the Ethical Humanist Society of Chicago. We've actually had an opportunity to hang out with Glenda a couple times.

She's come to shows. We went to a thing that they put on at Lagunitas a couple years ago. Oh, yeah. Great event. We had a lot of fun. So, Glenda, welcome to Cognitive Distance. Thank you. And welcome to Glory Hole Studios.

I have to say, I feel like I'm going to make my parents very proud when I tell them about my journey to the glory hole. Yeah. This is, this is. So few ladies at the glory hole. I'm just saying, it's usually a sausage party at the glory hole. Also, so few times that you can actually tell your parents about it. It's one of those things. I will go so far

as to say, even if it's a woman, it's so few ladies. I'll drink to that. Hopefully so few ladies. So, Glenda, you came here from the Ethical Humanist Society to talk about humanism. Tom and I identify

as humanists. And so we would like to hear from you to start out, if the from the Ethical Humanist Society to talk about humanism. Tom and I identify as humanists. Yay. And so we would like to hear from you to start out, if the audience doesn't know, what's the difference between an atheist and a humanist? Well, an atheist is more based on the idea that you have no belief in God or believe there is no God. Like I grew up with an atheist dad and his his thing is, it's not that, for him, it's like, it's not that I don't believe anything, it's that I believe in nothing.

That was his take on it. So with, which, I don't know, I'm sure there's plenty of other atheists that'll argue with me that. I mean, but, I'm not on dogma debate, so we're not gonna do that right now. Nobody is. So it's fine.

It's fine. But, so being an atheist is more about your non-belief in God or your belief that there is no God. And humanism is more about an investment and some would say a belief specifically in the good of humanity and doing what's good for humanity. Like, you know, one of the sayings that we toss around is a community for humanity. So, it's about recognizing each other's human elements, what makes us people, and putting that forward before even some of our own beliefs. So, you can be a humanist atheist, but you can also be a humanist Christian, a humanist Jew, a humanist Buddhist, a humanist, almost anything else, and

put that coloring over whatever your base spiritual or non-spiritual belief is. Do you have people that are in your group that are religious? Very few. I mean, so we're like right now, our building's in Skokie, so we have a couple people that are at least are culturally Jewish, and I know of them that they go, they do the Saturday service with a liberal congregation, and then they'll come to us. I particularly, most of us are atheists. I will say for myself in particular, I'm technically not. My belief in God is rather strained in the sense of it is a belief, but it is not a belief in a God that I think likes us.

I think likes us. I think if there's any evidence for anything, it's that. I crunched the numbers. I'm right fucking there with you. Because I cannot feel that kind of presence from whatever higher power it may be, I am a humanist because I can only really see it coming from other

people. A lot of, but I don't, I'm only speaking for myself because most of the people in our community are atheists. They're atheists, right. Yeah. And I like to, you know, one of my friends who's also the president of the society has said that, you know, the nice thing about humanism is you get a lot of atheists after the angry phase.

So you've got the people who like, they- Wait, there's an after the angry phase? For some people. I just- For some people. I just hang out in the angry phase. Yeah, I just have a- Yeah.

I'm just stuck here. Like, this is just the only phase I have. My angry phase is the refractory period in between being angry. Yeah, so, yeah. But yeah, it's kind of like, well, there's a lot of people, especially if they're leaving a faith, there's that first part where they go, oh my God, everything that I've ever believed was a lie. And that's how they personally feel. And then there's a phase afterwards of like, well, what the hell do I actually do about it? And one of the nice answers is humanist communities like ours.

So we get a lot of people like when they cool down and realize what they want to do with that. So I have a couple of questions. So your organization is the Ethical Humanist Society. Is ethical redundant in that respect? Or is there some distinction there? And can I join the unethical humanist society?

Because I really want to scam people out of money. But only if you donate it to charity. Yeah, right. Like, that's old Robin Hood. This is a really weird thing going on where I'm selling people hydrogen water and then at the same time giving that money to doctors

without borders. I'm like Dexter. So, they're actually, the way we started was that, so the organization actually started in 1882 and it wasn't humanism back then I don't know if it's

going to take it was it was ethical culture started by a guy by the name Joseph Smith good man he had magic plates

he looked in a hat and told people what he saw he was wearing a special monocle or whatever that's amazing I know it's true

so it starts a long time ago. Yes, it did. And it started to be more of an ethical culture movement. I see. So like around the 1880s, that's when it started. And so that's why we had the ethical part of it. And then over time, we became the Ethical Humanist Society. There's technically still like an ethical culture organizations that are out there.

But over the years for us, we've just drifted more towards humanism. I see. So I wanted to ask you a question about your definition of humanism, just because I'm curious. Something struck me is like, I'm wondering if you think people, like people in the broad sense, are just inherently good or are we obligated to try to do good maybe because we're not inherently good do you know what do you feel a distinction there i yeah i get what you're saying it's like is human nature naturally benevolent or is it you know is it just we naturally rely on each other because of survival which is which is a question that i've i've had

so much trouble with myself trying to figure it out because there's always, you feel like the science points to one thing and it points to another thing. And it's one of those big questions. Like for me personally, I'm the kind of person where if there's a big question, I don't know the answer. I'm like, fuck it. But I think for me, the thing that I noticed the most is we as a species tend to be very social. And if you're a social species, you do a lot better when you don't like start shiving each other in the back.

Sure, sure. So I feel like there's some natural inherent- Don't shiv? Yeah. Don't shiv. So another thing Tom writes on, make America great again. Oh, God.

You know what? I'm going to abbreviate it. Yeah, MAGA. MAGA. There you go. Oh, I'm going to put on a hat. That would fit right on the trucker. By the way, everyone,

that's the Ethical Humanist Society's logo. I just can see the rest of the publicity coming out crying. Like, why did you do this, Glenda? Oh, God. I asked that question, even though, like, I mean, I think there's no answer.

I was curious if the Humanist Society had a position on it. But what strikes me is that whether we think people are inherently good or not, what's more important is to do good, right? Exactly. Like, regardless of whether or not goodness is something that we inherently have, it's still something that we're obligated to do. Yeah. And I will say that, like, even though I'm not necessarily the most versed philosopher when it comes to humanism, the one thing that joining the Ethical Humanist Society helped me with is the practice of being good. And part of that practice, to be perfectly honest, is just sitting back and making sure you're not being a selfish prick about stuff. The idea that you have to take a moment and think about the bigger picture overall. And I think that's part of humanism is like, it's less about the individual and more about the community, whether the community is, you know, a small, like, you know, just your small neighborhood overall, or your family, or

whatever your religious or non-religious group is, up to like even the global community. And you start thinking about things like, you know, climate change and voting rights and, you know, women's rights and, you know, March for, like we did, you know, March for women's rights, March for science and all those things. And that's part of being part of the global community as well. Then there's kind of like layers. It's, you know, dare I say, it's like an onion, there's layers and there's, you know, the, you know. I mean, I was going gobstopper, but like was yeah no jawbreakers too you can go that way yeah so now I want a jawbreaker so

one of the things that happened to us a while back I think we were on Seth's show and we were talking about humanism and I remember

it was Tom and this is something Tom and I have talked about many times that you can't be a humanist and not be a feminist right because it's half of humanity

right so it's impossible to do and I remember catching a whole bunch of shit for that. We did. Because people on his show, they hate the idea of feminism.

Oh, that's too bad, yeah. And it's one of those things like, you can't be a humanist and be a racist. You just can't do it. They're just incompatible thoughts. So is your question, who can we hate? I was doing the same. That's where I was going.

I don't mean to interrupt you. That's where I was going. I was thinking, I was thinking to myself, I was like, who can we hate? Because I was doing the same. That's where I was going. I don't mean to interrupt you. That's where I was going. I was thinking, I was thinking to myself, I was like, who can we hate? And then I settled on Milo Yiannopoulos. That's where I fell. And I just want approval from the humanist society. This is cool.

Right outside of human. He's not a human, so it works. Yeah, I'm sure he's a lizard person. You know, he dig deep, like. Hot QAnon take right there. Oh my God, I can't believe I'm saying that. Anyway, I feel like he's a lizard person. You know, he dig deep like hot QAnon take right there. Oh my God, I can't believe I'm saying that. He pulls his mask off. And it's just a lot of gold underneath.

It was you meddling kids. Oh man. So what kind of stuff does the Humanist Society do? Well, the biggest thing that I think we're known for is that in our building in Skokie we have, and if you go to ethicalhumanistsociety.org, name drop, I did it. Yay. Because I can't be bothered to remember the address. I'm sorry. I just put it in my GPS or I'm like, husband, drive me. You know what I mean.

Yes, Ms. Daisy. And I just want all you people to know that's what feminism is. Oh, my God. But yeah, if you go to humansociet.org, you'll see that one of the biggest things we do is we have these Sunday programs. So usually when most people would be going to church to, you know, with dogma and creed, we instead invite speakers in to speak about, you know, what they're actually experts on or current affairs and things. So we've had anything from like scientists, journalists, advocates. We even had like Seth Andrews over once last year, actually. Oh, nice. Yeah.

You know, a variety of people with a variety of topics. And a lot of that is kind of, you know, the last year we've been thinking more about, you know, head, hand, heart. How do we do that? As a community, we've worked really hard to figure it out. And we've got, we realized we've got, dare I say, we have head down pat. So we figured out, you know, one of the things we do is help, you know, with intellectual curiosity and the thinking part of it. And the Sunday program series is one of the big parts of it.

And then while the Sunday program series is going at 10.30 in the morning on a Sunday, if you can handle it, I know some people are like- That sounds horrifying. 10.30 in the morning on a Sunday? I didn't even know they made a 10.30 in the morning on Sundays.

What is anyone using that time for? That's your sleeping time. But at the same time that's going on, we also have our Golden Rule Sunday School where we're trying to enlist those ideas of like the bigger community and how that relates to other people and learning about other cultures

and knowing what it means to relate to other cultures as well as being a representative of your own. You know, with the Golden Rule Sunday School where we have basically, we watch kids from like ages zero to 12 and have lesson plans. Like for how long? Like, can you drop them off for like a week?

Indefinitely? Yeah. Is there a limit to the number? The director would love it if I said that. Yeah. Yeah. But no, but it's essentially, essentially during the- Didn't answer the question.

I just want to say avoided the question. So I'm not going to answer for her. I know better than that. But yeah, so during the, so the program goes from like 1030 to noon and if you can't catch it,

we do have a YouTube channel and I will say our video quality has much improved. But, but 1030 to noon essentially like the adult program.

Do you record all your sessions? Almost all of them. Not every speaker lets us record like. Wow. Yeah. Yeah. And we do put them online. It's slowly.

So we're mostly volunteers too. We only have one paid position and everybody else is basically volunteering their time. So we don't, we like we'll release them in bundles as soon as we hear from the speaker. Yes, it's okay to post this and things like that. release them in bundles as soon as we hear from the speaker, yes, it's okay to post this and things like that. Some things we can't post, which is why I encourage people that if they can get out of bed for a 1030 program, should.

Because we have people talk about the legality of rape. It is illegal, I'm pretty sure. Very illegal. Does the one person who gets paid ever just make fun of the rest of them? Or is that unethical? I don't remember. She's like, she's like, Bitches!

Boom! Boom, bitches! Walks out, fucking making it rain. What's your ethical, humanist money? I'm going to buy, oh,

ethical, humanist money in this thing. Oh my gosh. Boom! I'm going to buy a gum bomb, not even going to chew, motherfucker. What?

Oh my God. Oh God. I have to say, I've got to give her a shout out. I'm sure even going to chew, motherfucker. What? Oh, my God. I have to say, I've got to give her a shout out. I'm sure she's mortified, but Sharon is one of the hardest working people there, which is why we pay her. That's what you have to pay. You have to pay for that. Oh, my gosh.

Yeah. I got a question, though. So people who leave their religion, they come to humanism, they're looking for something like this, right? They're looking for this structure that they had their whole life where they can drop their kids off for a couple hours,

go like listen to a homily, you know what I'm doing? The air quotes homily right now. The hard air quotes on that too. But you know what I mean? The hard air quotes. But you know what I mean? Like they can listen to someone

talk about something deep for a little while, which is what they do. I mean, they don't do that at church, but you know what I mean? Right, yeah. And so then they have this fill this void, the community void, like Tom just said. Yeah. Yeah. And that's exactly what we're trying to fill. And like, I know there's a lot of people out there. Like I was raised, I was undercover raised by an atheist. I didn't know this until he was 18. And then I was like, why the fuck did you let mom take us to Catholic school? What the

fuck is this? I thought it was funny. And even my mother's like, I'm sorry. But yeah, there's like a lot of people like us. And I come from both sides of my family. We were raised with this idea of that community being really important. I come from a long line of people who like they were deacons and members of the church. Like my grandmother is still very active in it and very prominent in specifically the Black Catholic community. And when I realized that was never going to be part of my life anymore, I was like, I'm a really social person. And I like having a group where we're kind of all on the same page

of like ethics and reasons and worldview. So when I found this community, I was like, I'm all in. I'm all in with this. And there are a lot of us out there who need that. We need to have that feeling of belonging. Like a lot of us, especially in the atheist community, like to laugh at like,

oh, it's silly for you to want to belong to something. But I think that's just inherent part of humanity. It yeah it's part of being a human which is essentially social creature yeah yeah exactly like that's just a known thing about yeah yeah you know and so if you really feel like you want that but you don't necessarily need it you don't need somebody to then spout to you this dogma and creed for about like an hour and a half. Instead, you can come and you can hear somebody talk about like, oh, I advocate for people who used to be sex workers. Here's my story. Or like, oh, this is what's happening in current events in Illinois.

Here's what's the news about that and my expertise on it. You know, we're doing that so you can actually think for your – you can retain some actual like facts, real hard facts with some expertise and, you know, do with that information what you will on your own rather than have somebody tell you how you should think about certain things in the world. And yeah, there's, we're obviously, we, you know, Black Lives Matter, you know, women's rights are human rights, trans rights are human rights, you know, all that stuff. We inherently believe that because that's part of humanism. All humans have a right to exist peacefully. I mean, God forbid we leave people the fuck alone. What the fuck? Like, so, but otherwise you can get information and do with it what you will and decide, you know, within your humanism what you want to do with it.

and do with it what you will and decide, you know, within your humanism what you want to do with it. I got to ask though, if I was somewhere else, not Chicago, where would I find this, a similar group? Do they have different like chapters all over the country? Yeah, yeah.

So the American Humanist Society, we're a member of the American Humanist Society. And, you know, and there's different iterations. Actually around Chicagoland, we're one of three. So we're based of three so we're so we're based like more Northside Skokie-ish right now

but if you go to American Humanist I think it's AmericanHumanistSociety.org or just Google American Humanist Society you can see there's organizations

across the country for people like us who like I want a community I want to hang out with people who think like me but I

and I don't I don't want to be a church, you know? And some of them are Unitarian Universalists. Yeah, yeah. You know, there's a few congregations like that that are very specifically humanist, but otherwise a lot of them are just groups of people who are like, let's meet at the bar. Let's talk about this topic.

Let's see how it applies to humanism and let's, or let's do community work, you know, you know, and things like that, you know, from, from, you know, partnering with churches to do soup kitchens and stuff, even though we're secular groups to like, you know, the underthought stuff. Like I've seen some groups do like for people that are in, in shelters, you know, a lot of things that they don't have include socks, underwear, and feminine hygiene products. And so a lot of times they're like, well, this is an underserved group. Let's do something for them. That's awesome. Yeah, it's great work.

And the great thing about being secular is like you're not scared of vaginas. Yay. So you can buy these tampons and give them to people who need them and stuff like that. I mean, you can still like throw them and run the other way. Yeah, I know. If you're still terrified. If you're just like, I don't believe in God, but I do believe in vaginas. And just run away. I just want to make sure we have options.

I've met some. I like the idea that like you have to believe in vaginas. I don't actually do. So I'm still an atheist when it comes to vaginas. I certainly don't believe in clits. What is it like?, big clit? Yeah, come on now. Who can find that?

That's some cryptozoology shit right there. The fuck? Okay, I'm going to take my fucking boat, my boat all the way down the river to the crest of the river. Whatever. Whatever. And here's foliage. We see it in the air. We barely see's fire and here's

the clit and it's natural habitat anyway so so if people were going to find

all this stuff first they can look on our show notes because we're going to have it on our

show notes it's episode 488 but if people want to find let's say the humanist societies across

the country where would they go if you go to americanhumanist.org you can you can not only find if there are other groups that are doing you know humanist meetings and stuff whether they have their own building or not near you but you can also just sign up to be a member on your own and keep up with you know humanist organizations and things because they also do things, you know, humanist organizations and things. Because they also do things like, you know, call your senator about this, you know, for keeping church and state separate

and things like that. And keep up with it there. So... And if you were going to look in Chicago, where would you go? Go to ethicalhumanistsociety.org. And that's where we are. And I don't know the websites for the other ones

but if you google like West Suburban Humanists of Chicago or End of the Line Humanists you'll find the ones that are around the West Suburbs and we're Ethical Humanist Society of Chicago is right

specifically in Skokie okay yeah so thanks for joining us thanks for coming in and thanks for thanks for doing such great work we will

hopefully people will hear this and visit their humanist society and decide that they're actually humanists instead of just jerk off atheists. What the fuck? Stop being lazy. Humanism is atheism. It's not lazy. Exactly. You kind of have to put the work in. And if I could just add one more thing.

So we are planning to do ethical drinking again. Yes. So we're still doing that October 28th. Okay. If you go to ethicalhumansociety.org, it's ethical drinking to the Witch's Brew. And we are going to have a jazz blues duo. I forget their names, but they actually have played for Chicago Blues Fest and all that. And there'll be beer, obviously. There'll be pizza. There'll be a silent auction, 50-50 raffle. And that's going to

be at Lagunitas at the end of October? Yes, October 28th. It's a Monday, right? Yes. Okay. So it'll be, yeah, I actually know the date this time. Yeah, okay. So yeah, October 28th. And we're also doing I hope people actually participate in this because at a whim we decided to do a witches and warlock

costume contest oh it's cool yes so please yeah because it's near Halloween and we're a bunch of heathens so why the fuck not yeah just do it

Glenda thank you so much for coming in and joining us and hopefully people will go and visit the humanist societies around there

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of getting a wonderful red Citation Needed mug. We got a message from Maz. And Maz sent a message that said, hey, they had to laugh when we were talking about cigarette prices because I was saying something like cigarettes are like 10 bucks a pack. They're $40 a pack in Australia. Yeah, when we were in Australia, prices because I was saying something like cigarettes are like 10 bucks a pack. They're $40 a pack in Australia.

Yeah. When we were in Australia, they were expensive in 2016. I can't imagine. Wow. $40 a pack. That's amazing. We got a message from Dave

and Dave found our podcast on Spotify and he's on episode 46. He's sort of binging it. And Dave's a trucker. I just want to say like, my dad was a trucker for 40 years. And so I have a it. And Dave's a trucker. I just want to say like my dad was a trucker for 40 years. And so I have a soft spot in my heart for truckers. So we hope you enjoy the podcast, Dave. And thanks for listening. You can find us on Spotify. All the episodes are there.

So if it's a way for anyone who wants to listen, Spotify is a great way to catch the show. Got a message. This is from Rebecca. And she sent a message that said that there's a new Church of Scientology that's possibly going to be opening up in the South Loop area. It's in the Printer's Row area. 650 South Clark, which is two or three blocks from my house. Right. From what I hear, though, the article came out in 2015, and there's never been any pressure

to go forward with this. So there's not a, there isn't anything there, but we'll see if anything ever comes in. If something comes in, I'm absolutely going in there. Are you? Oh, 100%.

Oh, 100%. I want to do one of those e-meter things. I want to touch my dick to the can. See what happens. Got a message from, this is from Sean and Sean said, hey, have you guys seen

this David Icke documentary? We have not, but Tom and I might watch it. I'm going to put it on the starred stuff so we all have something else to watch and review. So we might actually watch it

and see what goes into it. It's called David Icke Renegade. It's from 2019. So it's recent. We got a message from Lisa and Lisa is from Sweden. She wants us to hear about Malort. So here we go.

Hey guys. Malort is actually pronounced Malort, and is commonly used in liquor because it was supposed to have medicinal effects. The active substance had to be drawn out in alcohol. It was supposed to have the same effect as THC. Glory hole. Same effect as THC? That's in alcohol. It was supposed to have the same effect as THC. Glory hole.

Same effect as THC. That's called alcohol. So you gotta put a lot of alcohol in it and then you get all the good stuff from there. I do love when other people pronounce Malort though and it sounds so much better than us Americans

because we're just like Malort. We like sound like we're throwing up. Which is the sound you make when you drink Malort. It is genuinely the worst stuff. By the way, if anybody's ever in sound like we're throwing up. Which is the sound you make when you drink Malort. It is genuinely the worst stuff. By the way, if anybody's ever in Chicago and we're in Chicago and you are at a bar with us, tell us you want

a shot of Malort. Tom and I will absolutely we will buy you an unlimited number of shots until I go into debt. I will do it. I will do it. So anybody who wants it, you come find me. A bunch of people sent us messages about the conversation that you and I had

about slaves and enslaved people. We had it last episode. And it was something I was planning on cutting. And the reason why I didn't cut it, not to say one of us is wrong and one of us is right, because I actually think

that after we had that conversation, I agreed with your position. And from that point on, I used enslaved people because I was like, wow, that makes a lot of sense. I guess I really position. And from that point on, I used enslaved people because I was like, wow, that makes a lot of sense. I guess I really thought about it a little differently. And we moved on. The reason why I left it in there was not to say one of us is right or wrong. The reason why I left it in there was for an example of somebody hearing something and then changing their language about it. That's why I left it in there. It's like when you hear somebody's pronoun

for the first time and you're like, oh, I should use that pronoun. And then you use it why I left it in there. It's like when you hear somebody's pronoun for the first time and you're like, oh, I should use that pronoun. And then you use it. Right. I left it in there as an example of someone hearing something, changing their mind, and then following through with it. Right. So I know a bunch of people send me messages saying, hey, man, you're wrong.

I know I was wrong. That's why I changed my language. If you listen to the whole conversation, you could hear that happen. Yeah. I feel like, did you miss the second half of the conversation? Where I say out loud, that's a really great point, Tom.

I hadn't thought of it like that. And then I never said slave again. I said enslaved person. That's why it's in there. So I just wanted to say to everybody who was telling me that I was wrong, I know I was wrong. why it's in there. So I just wanted to say to everybody who was telling me that I was wrong, I know

I was wrong. I started writing the email before you were done with the conversation. That has happened to people before. We have gotten emails, mad emails from people who said, well, what the fuck about this? And then we'll get an email 20 seconds later that says, I finally finished the

conversation you guys got to there. That's happened countless times. Just get to the end of it. Yeah. This is a great message. This is from Matt. Matt number one. Matt's from Australia.

Yes. Matt says, do you think the anti-union mentality is like anti-vaccine unions where our vaccine against self-imposed slavery, we lost herd immunity

and now we're heading back to serfdom? Here's the thing. I think just like, just like vaccines, they are a victim of their own success. They are a victim. Everybody saw, hey, the workers were doing pretty good. They were getting, you know, like look at GM as a perfect example, right? All those people had a lot of like a good, a good, not a lot of money, but a good sum of money that they were getting, right? Those people had good paying jobs. They worked in a factory and then now look where they're at. And so I think we, I think it is, I think it's a great

insightful comment. It's a victim of its own success. Yeah. We already have weekends, right? We already have a 40 hour work week. We already have anti-child labor laws. We already have all the things you take for granted that the unions made for you. You already have that. The difference is like, you still think like there are people that for you, you already have that. The difference is like, you still think, like there are people who think you will just always have that without the ability to bargain back. Yeah. Yeah. But you will lose those things. And here's how I know you'll lose those things because you're losing them now. Because you're losing them now. Because the work week has crept up to 45 hours on average, right? I know you will lose those things because

we're watching the American workforce lose them by inches. You want to know what you're going to lose? You're going to lose your healthcare because Walmart's only going to employ you part-time. That's how you're going to lose it. And you're going to lose it as you work your way through this stuff. Like you say, it's not one thing. It's all these little things that you start to lose. Your benefits start to go. This starts to go. It's the old saying, if you give somebody an inch, they'll take a mile. If you don't have any way to prevent them from taking more than an inch, they're going to take more and more and more and more. And I think

that's an absolutely insightful comment, Matt. Thank you. Anthony sends a message in and his basic question is, did coats exist when Jesus supposedly existed? And that's a great point. We had cloaks for a long time until we actually invented jackets and jackets came into fashion well into the middle ages. I mean, we're talking cloaks until then and cloaks, hell, we still have cloaks. So yeah, I think they met us up

when he said he traded his coat for a sword. It's like he traded his Prius for a sword. I'm gonna get half of what I paid for the damn thing. Jesus. We also got a message from Christian about sword play. And he was mentioning that, you know, there were a lot of duels back then,

even when there was like sword fighting. And he's right. One of the things that I've heard too is that they actually, there was so many duels in France that they had to outlaw it. They had to basically say that we can't do this anymore because too many young kids

were killing each other. Too many young people were killing each other. That's crazy. So, but I also think that there's something to be said about, he's basically saying, his argument is,

look, if we just had swords, we would just kill each other with swords. My argument is, is that we're a lot softer nowadays. That's my argument. My argument is, is that we are a lot fucking softer. And the thing is, is like, back a lot fucking softer and the thing is is like

you can back then there wasn't anything worth living for now I have Netflix so I think there's something

worth living for now so but yeah thanks for the message Christian you're right there were a lot of duels back then and there was a lot of people

who killed each other we also don't live in an honor culture anymore we don't we don't and that matters yeah so that's gonna wrap it up for this week we want to thank Glenda for coming in who killed each other. We also don't live in an honor culture anymore. We don't, we don't. And that matters. Yeah.

So that's going to wrap it up for this week. We want to thank Glenda for coming in from the Ethical Humanist Society of Chicago. We're going to put links on this week's show notes. She's a wonderful guest. They're going to be having a ethical drinking coming up in October. There'll be a link to that. There's also a link to the Ethical Humanist Society

and to the Humanist Society in general, the United States. So check it out. Also link to their YouTube channel, all on this week's show notes. Be sure to check all those links out. But that is going to wrap it up for this week. We are going to leave you like we always do

with the Skeptic's Creed. Credulity is not a virtue. It's fortune cookie cutter, mommy issue, hypno-Babylon bullshit. Couched in scientician, double bubble, toil and trouble, pseudo-quasi-alternative, Thank you. Pisces, cancer cures, detox, reflex, foot massage, death in towers, tarot cards, psychic healing, crystal balls, Bigfoot, Yeti, aliens, churches, mosques, and synagogues, temples, dragons, giant worms, Atlantis, dolphins, truthers, birthers, witches, wizards, vaccine nuts, shaman healers, evangelists, conspiracy, doublespeak, stigmata, nonsense. healers, evangelists, conspiracy, double-speak stigmata, nonsense.

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