Cognitive Dissonance - Episode 534: Person, woman, man, camera, T.V.

Episode Date: July 27, 2020

Stories from the Week

Today's show is brought to you by AdamandEve.com. Go to AdamandEve.com right now and you'll get 50% off just about any item. All you have to do is enter the code word GLORY, G-L-O-R-Y, at checkout. Be advised that this show is not for children, the faint of heart, or the easily offended. The explicit tag is there for a reason. Recording live from Glory Hole Studios in Chicago, at least for one of us. Just for one. This is Cognitive Dissonance.

Every episode we blast anyone who gets in our way. We bring critical thinking, skepticism, and irreverence to any topic that makes the news, makes it big, or makes us mad. It's skeptical. It's skeptical. It's political. And there is no welcome mat. This is episode 534. And Cecil, I'm not going to lie to you, buddy. I am ugly jealous that you're in the studio tonight. I'm just like, I'm the kind of jealous that you're in the studio tonight.

That's just like, it's just unfair. And it's like kind of mean spirited, you know, like the'm just like, I'm the kind of jealous that you're in the studio tonight. That's just like, it's just unfair. And it's like kind of mean spirited, you know, like the kind of like when you see somebody's vacation photos and you don't like them anymore. Yeah. You know, as a person, you want to give up on the whole relationship. It's like, no, no more. No more. They're like, oh, look where I went.

And you're just like, uh, we don't talk anymore. Here's the thing though, Tom. One thing that you forget about the studio, the studio may look nice via Zoom, but it's 20 degrees warmer than where you are. I guarantee it. Oh, dude. I'm in the basement. It is fucking freezing in this basement. I guarantee it.

I guarantee it. Oh, is it brutal? It's not so bad, but you know, it does get hot in here. It warms up. It does. It's just the way it is. And it's because we record at night in the studio and when we record at night, they shut the air off. Why would they need the air on?

Because fuck you, that's why. That's why. So there's no air. That's good. We finally have internet back in the studio. So Comcast showed up on Monday, which is great. Did they give you a call on the number that I provided to them and gave specific instructions to do? And if you want to find out about our Comcast showed up on Monday, which is great. Did they give you a call on the number that I provided to them and gave specific instructions to do?

Motherfuckers. And if you want to find out about our Comcast adventure, you can watch last week's live stream. It's such a great company. I'm so done talking about it. You know what, Tom? I think we need to start the show with a little bit of U.S. marshal kidnapping.

What do you say? Is there a way that we can work that into our schedule today? Well, I don't know, Cecil. That shouldn't be a fucking thing that happens. You know. But yeah, I think that maybe we should.

This is crazy because I feel like I don't take a break from the news, Cecil, at all. I read the news several times a day. I read the times, everything that the times produces every day on their front page on their, on their, um, uh, app, you know? So I read through it. I try to stay reasonably abreast of things. And I feel like one day I woke up and was like, wait, what the fuck now in Portland? Like, like, like seriously, seriously. I just like, I like looked at it was like, and I turned to my wife and I was like, fucking like people are just getting thrown into vans in Portland, Oregon, like Portland, like keep Portland weird.

Portland. Like, yeah. Yeah. I thought the same thing. Like, keep Portland weird. Portland. Like. Yeah. Yeah. I thought the same thing. I thought the same thing. I thought, wait, Portland? Wait, Portland?

All this happened, it started, the genesis of this starts in Minneapolis. And somehow Portland is the place that is. But I'll tell you what. They have been, they've been, and it's one of those things that has been happening for a while, right? So this is not just one thing that's happened. This has been happening for a while. They had a little farmer's market there for a while in the middle of the city. I don't know if you remember the little farmer's market they had there.

They had a little zone that they had where they basically came in in the middle of the night and bulldozed the shit out of it. But they had a little zone where people were hanging out and basically trying to show that it was almost like an Occupy. You know what I mean? It felt like an Occupy sort of Wall Street feel to it.

And then after that happened, then they started protesting. And what happened was the president kept saying to everybody, because he's, he's Nixon 2.0, right? So he's Nixon 2.0. He is the law and order guy. Okay. He is. He's like Nixon without integrity. I know. I know. But like, that's an honestly, that's an honest thing to say. Yeah, they washed it out of him. Yeah. Like Nixon had enough integrity to resign, honestly.

Yeah. Like he's Nixon without integrity. Yeah, he genuinely is. And he's running the exact same playbook, which is law and order, screaming law and order, saying the country's in unrest. I saw a video this week posted by one of the people

on his re-election committee or whatever they posted a video of portland of the of the unrest up there of the the protesters charging which i thought was badass as fuck they were they shield wall charged a group of these fucking fascist thugs that are coming to kidnap people. And they fucking shield bash charged them with all their shields out, throwing fucking bottles and tear gas back at them. And they chase these federal officers. And I was like, fuck you, get them, go get them. But anyway, I'm sitting there cheering. And instead what he, what he said was, this is what, this is what Biden's America would look like. And you got to stop for a second and say, but this is Trump's America right now.

I know. Thank you. Like, this is what it would look like. This is your current America. This is the direct result of three and a half years of your fucking leadership. Your shit, yeah. It's your job. He's already projecting the current problems of his administration on a future administration. Yeah, exactly.

Here's how he works it. Everything that's bad happened either before he got here or somehow fucking inexplicably happened after he left. He is the only person who proactively blames current problems on future leaders. That is a, did you see, by the way, the, the protester that like,

like just stripped off all of her clothes in the middle of the street, started doing yoga. Yeah. And like the cops were just like, nah, we're not sure what to do now. They were just like, I'm not,

I'm not, I just can't do that. I can't. Just, just remember, I'm not, I'm not, I just can't do that. I can't. Just, just remember this folks. This is, this is for the guys out there. If there's ever one of these chest bumping guys that comes at you, just drop your drawers and hold your hands. Go for it. Cause they're going to run screaming. They're going to run screaming for sure. I, I, I, you see the, you saw the Navy vet though I'm sure he's been all over the news the Navy vet who got the shit kicked out of him

he walked right up and he wanted to ask the officers who they were and what they were doing now I want to let the audience know that I did just the tiniest bit of research here and one of the things that I found out is that the officers may or may not have to identify themselves

it's muddier with federal officers, right? You do have to, I think the other officers may or may not have to identify themselves, but like if you're a local officer, but if you're a federal officer, they're not necessarily bound by the same rules and regulations that a local police officer would be. So they might not have to. Portland law may require them to because they're acting in the stead of these local officers. So there's some muddiness there, but they might not have to say who they are,

which again, terrifying and scary. And there's a fucking bill that's going to be supposedly put into play that we might be talking about a little later about this. So anyway, this guy walks up and he's a vet and he tries to talk to them like a vet to say, hey, I'm a vet, you're a vet, let's have a conversation. You know, both of us were in the military together.

We could have a conversation. They beat the shit out of this guy with their sticks. And then when he literally doesn't move, they break his fucking hand. They break this guy's hand and he just stands there, looks them in the eye, sniffs a little and maybe spits, right? He doesn't do fuck all. They had to fucking bear spray him in the face to get him to finally spin around. But they genuinely fuck this guy up for no fucking

reason whatsoever. And that's what's, that's been the whole, the whole thing is that this is what Trump has wanted since the beginning. He's wanted this sort of show of force against people. And what's crazy to me, Tom, is that there's a group of people out there, a large group of people, not just a small group, that blame the violence on the protesters no matter what. And they almost seem to forget that what sparked this off in the first place was not protesters being violent. It was someone murdering someone in cold blood on camera. That's what made people angry. So the violence was already out there when things started, but somehow we have to spin it around and blame the victim and then somehow make the police the victim in all of this. There's a fucking bizarro world, man. How in the world are like the cops

who are just like, what I understand is like on the right for the longest time, like I'm thinking back to, remember those like, those fucking total maroons who like occupied a birdhouse

or whatever in Oregon. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, like there's a, I'm in Bundy. Yeah, yeah. There's like a whole, it's like a whole thing on the right

about, like, fear of any kind of federal overreach, right? Any regulation at all is federal overreach. You know, if there's an EPA regulation that's passed

which says, like, you can't dump poison in a river that is used for drinking water for babies. Like, there's people who are like,

my rights to dump my poison. Exactly. I should be able to carry a gun into a middle school. And I mean, just like they don't want any laws at all. Right. Because what they want is they want the federal government to leave them the fuck alone. I think like that's a little bit crazy. Right.

I'm not I'm not one of those guys. But what I'm wondering is like, where are all those motherfuckers now, right? When you've got federal troops unprovoked, beating the ever-loving shit out of American citizens, occupying states against the wishes of the state government and against the wishes of the municipal government. You have federal troops coming in and taking over the state's rights, literally occupying as a militarized force. Where are those guys now? Why is the right not screaming about this? This is genuinely antithetical to that viewpoint in a way that's like ideological and every single tea party protester should be out there right now because that's what do you remember what they were afraid of do you remember jade helm

yeah do you remember jade helm do you remember the fucking how much pants shitting went out over that how all those fucking assholes on the right every single one of them was screaming and shitting and crying and fucking holding themselves and rocking back and forth and weeping and gnashing of teeth. And none of those motherfuckers, where are you at now? Jade Helm was bullshit. It was a lie. It was a joke. It wasn't anything. And you guys flipped your shit over it. You know why? Because it was a black dude in office because you don't care because the white guy's on your side. But you know what? If it was a black guy in office right now, I would be just as against it because nothing happened under Obama. Fucking everything's happening under Trump. Yeah. All of the grotesquery that is the

federal overreach of power, which we should all be concerned about. Like we like like this is not this is not the bigger government that progressives are asking for, right? Progressives are asking for larger government interventions. Absolutely. Progressives are asking for more regulations. Absolutely. That is true. dissolution of your civil rights. Like your First Amendment right is to gather, to protest, to speak, to address your government for wrongdoings, to assemble peaceably. You can't tell me I have the right to peaceably assemble if proximity to a federal officer

results in a beating. Yeah, or an abduction. Let's talk about that. That's crazy. Yeah, so this week I saw several videos of these fucking jackbooted fascists getting out of their cars, these federal officers,

walking up and grabbing a person off the street and not saying anything, literally not saying a word and dragging them off. And then they just disappear. That is literally like third world authoritarian dictatorship murder shit. You know what I mean? Like if that was another country, we would,

we would question their election results. If that was another country, like we would consider overthrowing them, right? We might invade them. We might invade them. Right. That's insane. Like when that happens in other countries, it's called disappearing people. Where's Great Britain? Where's Australia? Can you guys invade us, please? Oh my God. How much would you love to be invaded by Australia right now? Oh my God.

I would lube myself up and welcome them inside me. I would do naked yoga. Naked yoga. Are you kidding me? I would welcome them to our shores with the chocolate starfish. Let me tell you. Oh, man.

Come inside me, Australia. Put me on the Barbie right now. But, you know, the other thing, too, is that not only are they doing this, right? But they're not only kidnapping people, but they're also having this they doing this, right? Not only are they, but they're also, they're not only kidnapping people, but they're also having this show of force, right? And so they're grouping up in large groups and then they're bullying people and hurting people. Now this week we saw a bunch of moms up there in Portland,

lock arms, bicycle helmets, goggles on, trying to stand there and they fucking tear gassed those ladies. What the fuck are those ladies doing? What the fuck is happening? What are they doing? What did the moms do? Tell me what the moms did.

Tell me what those ladies linking arms did that was so fucking awful that they deserved to get tear gassed. I'm dying to hear your fucking diatribe on how they deserved that, right? Watch any of the video. Tom, you turned me onto a video I didn't even know about. You talk about this New York Times piece where they, they, they reviewed 60 videos and they showed the cops sparking off the violence every single time. It's because fucking it's, it's what's happening in the world and every

single place. And it's getting caught on camera now more than ever. But the New York Times did a wonderful piece on this. They did. And it's like, you know, what's upsetting is like, it should be enough that this is caught on camera. And like in any responsible administration, like I'll just say, like even George W. Bush's administration would not have tolerated this. Yeah. There has never been an administration in my lifetime that I think would have tolerated this. It's like, you know, when you watch those, like, the videos of the civil rights protests

and, like, people were turning hoses and dogs and clubs on peaceful protesters, we watch that video as, like, as a historical record of a grievous injustice. And when we see that, we see that as an emblematic example of a grievous injustice and an infringement upon our civil rights.

And we see that now happening in our streets. And we should say, holy shit, this looks distressingly familiar. This is unacceptable behavior by the authoritarian mob, which is taking over the fucking streets of America. And instead, you've got a president who's literally like sending in the troops. And let's talk about those troops.

There's no like, there's no troops for him to mobilize properly. So what this is, is a weird hodgepodge of like ICE agents and like ATF agents and just like U.S. Marshals.

It's like whoever like raised their hand in fucking thug class, you know. These are not people who are trained to do this kind of work. They're trained to do an entirely different kind of work. Yeah, let's be real honest. I don't think the police officers are trained to do this kind of work. They're trained to do an entirely different kind of work. Yeah, let's be real honest. I don't think the police officers are trained to do this kind of work either

because they've shown over and over and over again that they fail utterly in de-escalation. So I'm not saying that the police officers do it, but these guys are really, really, really extra special and trained. It's like putting me in a fucking bulletproof vest and goggles and your weird fucking camouflage with my gun and sending me out there. I don't know what the fuck I'm doing either.

It's like, you know what I'm reminded? When I was 18, I had a job working security. It was called the World Music Theater back then. Yeah, yeah, it's a Twitter center now. It's a big, giant outdoor venue, holds 30,000, 40,000 people, right? And so I was super excited to get this job as security. I'm like 18, and I'm going to see free concerts. Like, that's the whole reason I got that job was

I wanted to go and see free concerts and like, it didn't turn out that good actually at all. No, I'll tell you that in a second, but like the whole like security training that we had was about a 30 minute, like video that we watched. That was basically like, we watched the video and when then they were like, okay, cool cool your security for like 40,000 people and I'm like I'm like 18 I'm like all like I'm just made out of fucking adrenaline at this point in my life and like I went there I'm like I want to see concerts but now I kind of want to like I kind of want to like punch old people you know like I want to go to a Jimmy Buffett concert and have some middle-aged guy take a swing at me so I could like knock him down. Yes, sir.

I do want a piece of you. Because you're like a piece of shit and like you're totally untrained. That job, by the way, mostly involves standing around, not looking at the stage, looking the other direction. You have to look at the crowd the whole time. So it's like, oh, but something amazing is happening behind me, you know?

And like, so you're looking at the stage and everybody hates you because you're like the man. So like you realize immediately like- You're the one who takes away my weed.

Yeah, you're like, this sucks so bad. And like, I don't want to be the man. Like that sucks. And then like at the end of- You want to punch people who like the man,

but you don't want to have any of the responsibilities to do that. Yeah, I didn't even want to be the man. Like that sucks. And then like, you want to punch people who like the man, but you don't want to have any of the responsibilities. Can I just be, can I just be the guy who beats people up and you take all the flack? Yeah, that's what you want

when you're 18. Yeah. So, and then like at the end, they all give like, everybody that works there gets a garbage bag and you walk the lawn.

You were clean up crew too. That everybody walks the lawn. So you're like, you've got this garbage bag and these gloves and you're picking up like used condoms. Oh Jesus,

what now? Dude, you've been there. Like imagine after like a fucking, like I worked like the Jimmy Buffett concert, which was a, that's the one I was talking about

old people. Cause old people did take a swing at me. Like you'd be like, sir. Oh yeah. You're like, sir, you got to find your seat.

Like you're just standing for like, they're just drunk as sir. Oh yeah. You're like, sir, you got to find your seat. Like you're just standing for like, and they're just drunk as shit. Cause they let them like party in the parking lot. It's alcohol makes everything like kick off a thousand times worse. Yeah. Alcohol and like, like,

uh, entitled, like middle-aged men. Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Like, yeah.

More than one of them took a swing and it's like, you are slow. That is not a thing for you. I'm 18. You're 40. This is not for us. Yeah. But like, yeah are slow. That is not a thing for you to do. I'm 18, you're 40. This is not for us. But like, yeah, like Cypress Hill and like Jimmy Buffett and like, I worked one of those big festivals.

I can't remember which one off the top of my head. But yeah, the lawn is a nightmare of like broken glass and used cotton. Syringes. And you're just like, God, I hate this job. I worked like three shows and then they called like, you want to work? I'm like, I don't want to work.

I don't. This job is the worst. Never again. I hated this job. That was my jackbooted thug experience. Oh, man. And at 18, I realized it wasn't the right thing to do. In one of the articles that we have this week that we looked at was the Portland mayor.

Yeah. Went out. First off, the Portland mayor, you probably are not going to find a home among the protesters, Portland mayor. But he comes out and he's trying to have a conversation with the people and the protesters in Portland. And the feds gassed everybody, including the Portland mayor. And the Portland mayor said, I didn't think that was called for. He saw, I don't think that was called for. Well, number one, it probably wasn't called for

any of the times your guys did it to them the previous weeks. So that's number one. You know, and that's the thing is, I think one of the biggest things. But the other thing is, is that here's what I don't want as a protester. I don't want you to come out and talk to me.

I want you to fix it. You don't want you to come out and talk to me. I want you to fix it. You don't fucking walk arm in arm with me, Lori Lightfoot, to try to fix police violence because walking arm in arm with me doesn't mean anything. That's a show. That's a photo op. What I want you to do is I want you to sit at your desk and write up some bills that stop the police

from hurting people. That's what I want. I don't need you outside. You being outside doesn't help anything. You're the person who fix it. We march, you fix it. That's how it works. Don't go outside and fucking march with your protesters or stand there and try to talk to them one-on-one. Fix it or shut the fuck up. Those are your two options. Man, you're so right. They're trying to do this symbolic gesture, but the symbolic gesture is problematic. Right. Because, and, and like on the one hand, I'm sympathetic to, to the idea that like, okay, like you won me over. I want to like, I want to show my solidarity, but like,

if it's just a show and there's nothing behind it, there's no action behind it, then that's just grandstanding. That's you you're essentially politicking for re-election. You're not actually accomplishing anything for the protesters. So, like, I would be down with it if it was like, hey, you know, grab a bullhorn, here's what I did today to address your concerns, guys. Now I'm sorry that I didn't hear. Now

let's link arm in arm. I'm right here with you. I'm using my power to, you know, like, but they don't do that. They come out and they're just like, Black Lives Matter! And then they get a little tear gas and then they don't do anything. Then they don't take any substantive action in the, with a lack of substantive action. Symbols are like not only meaningless, but symbols are hypocritical if they don't have actions that, that, that undergird them. Right. So I thought it was kind of hilarious that he got tear gassed and he was like, and he says,

that stings. Like, yeah, it's tear gas, asshole. Yeah. Am I pregnant? Am I pregnant? Am I pargant? Am I gregnant?

Am I peggnate? Help? Is there a possibly that I'm pegrant? Am I preggagnant or am I okay? Could I be preggonate? How do I know

if I'm prengan can i be pregnant can you get pregante preganant so cecil's story comes from uh nine.com.au man fake death to avoid jail but typo gave him away so this is amazing this guy in new york uh faces four years in prison. That's in addition to his earlier sentences. He stole a Lexus is what he did. And so he gave to his attorney and his attorney is like, I was an unwitting pawn in this. So I don't really know how that works.

He gave to his attorney a death certificate that he like badly photoshopped. And my favorite thing is that like when he photoshopped it he didn't spell check it so the reason that like the reason he did it didn't work is because he misspelled registry man like if you're gonna take the fucking time to photoshop a death certificate to try to get out of jail and fake your own death. Kind of more power to you. First of all, I'm like, hey, man, kind of hope that works for you. I guess. But like, it's pretty awesome.

If you see a red squiggle under any of the words, motherfucker, that's one you right click on and fix it. He also has a no regerts tattoo, too. I mean, come on, let's be honest. no regerts tattoo too. I mean, come on, let's be honest. I feel like if you're going to have to fake your own death

that you shouldn't be allowed to do it unless there's some sort of coffin full of money somewhere that's masquerading as your body. You shouldn't be allowed to do it with paperwork.

I just feel like that's cheating. You should have to go through the whole family. There should be a whole family that are crying over your funeral that's how you fake a death

have you not seen a movie come on you can't fake your death without the fake fucking ceremony like it's just it's gotta be a ceremony you're gonna deny me

the right of passage of my own and then you gotta go to your funeral and see who mourned you and then you get like pissed off that like people were like

standing around like talking about work instead of like, you know, crying about yes. Reports are going to be due tomorrow. Fuck you. I'm dead over here. Oh,

it would you, if you could fake your own death, would you go to your own fake funeral? Oh, fuck. Yeah. In a minute, in a minute,

I would dress, I would dress like someone I would probably want to dress like Sarah. So people could come up and say how sorry they are that I'm gone. If I could do it, I would give my own eulogy. Because I think that would be so baller. You got to do it though.

I think you could with video easily. Oh, yeah. But that's like pretentious as fuck to like record your own eulogy. Fuck it. so baller. You got to do it though. I think you could with video easily. Oh yeah, but that's like pretentious as fuck to like record your own eulogy. Fuck it. Who cares?

You're dead anyway. That's true. That's true. What the fuck? Who cares? I'm not going to give it. That's true. You're not going to care

after it's all over. I am 100% recording Mike. Be as pretentious as you can. It's your death. The world ends when you die. Did you happen to see the cause of death on his fake suicide thing? I didn't know.

Cause of death, suffocation. Suffocation. Manner of death, suicide. What did he put a pillow over his face? He didn't just fix it, he suffocated. He's got a belt strapped the pillow to his face. Sorry, I ran out of masks. I was using this pillow instead.

Also, in an effort to bone up on foreign policy, I went to the Times Square area to see a film called The Bush Doctrine. It was not about politics. I was embarrassed to be wrong, but mostly disappointed I wasn't right. So the story comes from The Intercept. Democrats unveiled draft foreign policy platform with promises to end forever wars and regime

change. I want to say, Tom, that, you know, for many years, there's been this both sides are the same argument. And we've heard that a lot, right? You hear that a lot. Both sides the same, both sides the same, both sides the same. And there are some policies in the government that both sides really have been the same for a very long time. And if you look back at the 2016 policies that the Democratic Party was going to be planning on

putting into place if Hillary were to get elected, a lot of them were very hawkish policies. And it's really just a holdover from Obama, who was a pretty hawkish president. And it's very heartening, I think, to see that not only are we moving left on some of these social issues that when we came into the primary season, there was no real talk about UBI. There was no real talk about a lot of the felons voting. There was no real talk about that. There was all these different extra things that were added during the primary that pulled a lot of people left. And now when Sanders, Sanders is part of this planning committee

with Biden's people, and these policies are pretty heartening. I mean, ending forever wars is huge. I think like even just like calling out the idea that we have forever wars, because like that's never how war is sold to us. Like I will say like specifically talking about our fucking adventuring in the Middle East.

Like, the bullshit war in Afghanistan and the even more egregiously bullshit war in Iraq, neither of which accomplished any significant goals. Like, they didn't make us safer. They didn't make the world any safer. And they certainly didn't make Iraq safer. Well, they made us less safe. So, like, just selfishly, your foreign policy, generally speaking, should at least benefit you. If it doesn't benefit you, you're doing- Yeah, why the fuck are you doing it? Right? Yeah. And our fucking nonsense adventuring in Afghanistan in no way benefited us. And our nonsense adventuring in Iraq made us vastly less safer. So they were both bullshit wars, but they were also sold as things we could like zoom in zoom out america so strong and i remember it i remember the selling of both of these wars

and like yes the idea was like you've got no idea how big our dick is yeah we are gonna blow through here we are gonna fuck shit up it's gonna be shock and awe. And to the credit of, to that narrative, like from a sheer, like overwhelming the other guy's military standpoint, it took virtually no time. Right. Because yeah, it's the United States versus like a country with a GDP less than California. Sure. Right. So yeah, absolutely overwhelmed them. But the second part, the part that we're like, we never seem to like account for is like the, well, okay, what then peace? And we don't account for that. And that's how we end up in these fucking forever wars. Because like, it's like, it's like if you beat somebody up and it's like, all right, well, you beat him up. What

are you going to do about it? Well, I mean, I just plan to beat the guy up. I don't have a plan after that. Like I, you know, like I, I beat the shit out of that guy. Okay. Well, I mean, I just plan to beat the guy up. I don't have a plan after that. Like, you know, like I beat the shit out of that guy. Okay, well, does that resolve your conflict? Well, no, we have the same client. We're still upset about the same shit we were upset about before. It does nothing. It's meaningless.

So I love that we're at least calling this shit out. Like if you're going to invade a fucking country, you're in it to win it for generations. That's just, I mean, like, hey, where's our, where are our biggest military bases? Like if you're going to invade a fucking country, you're in it to win it for generations. Yeah. That's just, I mean, like, hey, where's our, where are our biggest military bases? Japan and Germany. Yeah.

It's not an accident. Yeah. And the imperialist bullshit that we've been pulling forever, getting called out by a party that genuinely was an imperialist party is heartening in my opinion. Now, I don't know how much they're

going to be able to follow through on any of that stuff. And this all comes back down to whether or not you can get things done, right? Because it's not just one person who loves war in this country. There's a lot of people who love war and a lot of people who like to kick the shit out of other countries and a lot of people who love our imperialist policies. And we benefit greatly from those policies. So the very fact that those policies are gonna be real hard to change, but it's a good thing to see that there's another voice there that is saying,

no, there's a different path, something else that we can try, some other way to maybe even help other people in the world. They're talking about, you know, violence, not being your first thing you turn to. It's really not. I mean, this is, I'm not, when I praise this plan, I'm not praising it for its forward thinking. I'm just praising it for its normal everyday. Yeah. That sounds about right thinking. Yeah. Can you imagine if like, you imagine if in any other part of life, one of the options that you had just in your pocket at all times was like, well,

if that doesn't work. So, okay, guys, we're really looking to increase our market share across the board, minimum 3% this quarter. We've got these sales strategies. We're going to outline them. Ted, he's going to go through them. They're great. You'll love them. Also, remember, if those don't work, we can machine gun our competitors at any moment. We have a lot of machine guns. They have very few machine guns. Very few machine guns. Like, it's, what the fuck?

Like, that's, and the other thing too, man, is like our biggest line item is the military on our budget. We spend a gurgle dollars on our military. So like this bullshit where people are like, well, how are you going to pay for all these things the progressives want? Like, well, I don't know.

Maybe we don't need a Brazilian dollars worth of fucking weapons if we're not always engaged in war. Yeah. We only need to spend a Brazilian dollars in weaponry if we're always fucking engaged in wars.

Yeah. Or we're always like thinking maybe there'd be a nice use for these. Cut that shit out. And there's your money for Medicare. There's your money for like pre-K education and childcare. There's your money for like paid maternal leave. There's your money for so many things that like would genuinely make the country a better fucking place to live in. And that's because it's a yearly cost, right? These aren't just one-time costs that you cut it out and then you say, you know, because when you talk about some of these taxes

that people are talking about putting in, those are one-time influxes of cash that you just don't see. You see nothing but a trickle after that, right? Right. So there's some one-time influxes where you get a large portion, but then what happens after that? And yeah, you can use things like that to say pay off all the student debt

and then that equals that and that's crossed off the line item and that's the end of the story. But you can't use that stuff for say, because if it's not recurring payments, how are you going to use it as Medicare for all? It's just not going to work, right? Because you only have one influx of cash

and then you don't have the cash anymore. But this is perfect because you're taking away from a yearly spending item and moving it to a new yearly spending item. It's you looking at your budget and saying, I don't know how I can eat this month. And you're paying $700 a month for Netflix. You know, you just, okay, well, I guess I got to cancel Netflix. And like, you know, it is a bullshit narrative that like without an enormous military, enormous military, that like at any moment, we're just going to get invaded by China, right? Because you know what? I don't know what the fucking military budget for, let's say, Vietnam is.

Yeah. But nobody's invading Vietnam right now. Like nobody, like we don't have to do this. Yeah. Like we have enough stuff to be scary enough that like no one is going to like show up with a bunch of boats and be like, we'll take Ohio, please.

That's not happening. It'd be awesome if they got the boats all the way to Ohio. You can, there's a lake and a river and stuff. There's a river, you can go right up. Wouldn't it be great if they got to Ohio and we were just like, yeah, you can have it. Yeah and a river and stuff there's a river you can go right up wouldn't it be great if they got to Ohio and we were just like

yeah you can have it yeah just yeah that's fine that's fine that's cool give us like a couple hours to pack our shit

I won't even trade you for anything you can just have it look there's Skyline Chili here you guys are gonna want this yeah it's all yours mama mia

that's some piece of spicy meatballs Jack sorry take 28 chilly here. You guys aren't going to want this. It's all yours. Mama mia, that's a some species spicy meatballs, Jack. Sorry. Take 28. Out, Tony. And action. Mama mia, that's a spicy meatballs. Cut. What was the matter with that? The accent. Meecy, micey, ballsy,

ballsy. Cut. Take 59. This story is stupid and I love it. It's from BuzzFeed News. A college student... BuzzFeed's hard from BuzzFeed News. A college student. BuzzFeed's hard-hitting reporting here. You know what? Dude, I love that like there are a handful of places like BuzzFeed that have on the one hand some genuinely amazing reporting and then they've got this. I love this so much.

and then they've got this. And I love this so much. A college student pleaded to retake her online exam after a meatball fell and logged her out early. So there's a picture of this woman and she's standing there

forlorn, absolutely fucking dejected looking with this meatball sandwich. And you can see where the bread had gotten sogged up by the sauce and it broke through the bread like a sogged up by the sauce and it broke through the bread like a fucking dam in michigan and like here's what it says i am not kidding i

am sitting here eating a meatball sub taking my e-contest a meatball falls out of my keyboard and exits out the test i fucking love this she says it hits some sort of escape button and close the entire browser oh gosh but i and this is initially more worried about her sandwich this is a woman after my own heart she drops the meatball her fucking final or whatever is trash and she's like holy shit is that meatball still good yeah five second roll. You're picking your long hairs off of it to put it back in your sandwich. This is why you don't sing on top of spaghetti while you're doing your econ test. Oh, so I had, I had a class. Um, it was, it wasn't econ. It was an economic, it was a, It was a accounting class I had in college.

And I wanted to say, you know, I feel this person's pain of the stark terror of being doing bad in a class because my whole college career, I did pretty well, right? I did pretty well. I learned how to do it pretty early. And my first couple semesters, I was not a very good student. I didn't really understand what I was doing, but I figured it out. In grad school, the graduate school that I've done, I've done a couple of graduate schools so far, I did pretty well. I did pretty well for myself because I learned how to take classes and return what they wanted from you.

Be very conscious of what they were asking for and be able to return it back to them. And I remember I took this class and it was one of those classes and it felt like one of those landmine classes that you take. It was an accounting class. And it was literally, Tom, I mean, it was the 500 level accounting class.

It was the easiest accounting class they had in this graduate school. And so I went and I took the class. I had to take it. It was a required course. And it's one of those landmine courses that just detonates and people leave the graduate program. It's one of those classes. There were several of these classes in my philosophy undergrad like that too, where you take it and you could just see the non-majors and the people who were, you know, who are not as interested in this anymore. Peace the fuck out. I don't want to

do this anymore. No, I'm done with Foucault. That's it. I quit. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. And so I take this class and- The birth of the exit. I'm out of here. I do take this fucking class. And in this class, they had, it was an online course. And I would watch this guy's lectures three times and take notes. There was pages and pages of vocabulary

we had to memorize, formulas and all kinds of stuff. And I actually like math. I'm one of those guys who likes math. I don't, I'm not, I never got to a really high, high, high level of math, but all the math I've ever had in my life, I've really enjoyed, especially the stuff that had to do with logic, I really enjoyed. So I wasn't afraid of the math and I

wasn't afraid of any of the formulas, but there was just so much vocabulary and so much new stuff that I just didn't understand. I spent all this time on it. And I remember him saying, okay, so here's what you got to do. You have to take the test and I'm going to trust you because it's an online course. I'm going to trust you that you're not going to use your notes. It's a no notes test.

So it's no notes. You take the test with no notes and then, you know, it's an online course. And so the test comes back to you. And Tom, you know me, you know, I would never cheat. I would never cheat. And so never cheat. I would never cheat. And so I started taking these classes.

I started taking these tests. And I was getting, I'm getting 31%. I'm getting 28%. My best test, I think I got a 53% on it. And I'm staring at the- Was it curved?

I'm staring at the grade. I'm staring at the fucking screen after I get a 20, like a 24%. And I just studied for six straight hours for this test and I failed it so miserably. I'm just looking at myself and it's, and it's like a black mirror, right? The screen goes dark, the screen goes dark and it says you failed. And I just look at the screen and I could just see myself and just see myself worth crumbling as I stare at the screen. And it gets to the point of the quarter where it's drop, it's put up or shut up, drop or don't, right?

Because if you don't drop, you're going to get a bad grade. And I'm looking at my course grades and the best thing I got time was a 53. So I go to see this guy and I say, man, I'm sorry. I've got to talk to this teacher. So I go talk to the teacher. That's the first time I'm looking at my course grades and the best thing I got to him was a 53. So I go to see this guy and I say, man, I'm sorry. I've got to, I've got to talk to this teacher. So I go talk to the teacher. That's the first time I'm meeting him. And I said, you know, I just wanted to let you know, I got to drop your class. And he said, well, why are you dropping? And I said, what? I'm getting a 24% on your fucking tests. I'm the worst. I'm the worst accounting student I've ever met in my life. I shouldn't even be allowed

accounting books you should actually take away all my money this shouldn't happen to me and he says well let me take a look at your grade and he looks at it and he says you're getting a B plus I don't know what you're talking about I said a B plus how is that even possible did you even pass this class

what are you talking about and he said no I grade him on a curve he said you're actually doing really well. You're one of the better students. Worst thing that ever happened. What a terrible teacher. I finished the class. At the end of the class, I did finish the class with a B.

But in graduate school, if it's not an A, it's an F in graduate school. I mean, it's one of those things that it feels, it felt really bad to even get a B in that class. I tried my ass off in that class. There's some stuff I am destined not to know and that's it right there. So I would be the guy who dropped my fucking meatball on it

and I would just say, fuck it. I don't even care. I need the keyboard after that. Oh gosh, I only have a moment to record this. Are you trying to run away from the notifications Oh, gosh. I only have a moment to record this. Are you trying to run away from the notifications and the responsibilities on your plate like I am? Well, Adam and Eve knows it, too.

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And whose baby is this? You know how much a one bedroom apartment costs in Manhattan? $77,000 a month. You know what a roof costs? You can't afford it. You know what breakfast, lunch, and dinner cost? Put it this way, it'd be cheaper to eat a month. You know what a roof costs? You can't afford it. You know what breakfast, lunch, and dinner costs? Put it this way. It'd be cheaper to eat a roof. Well, believe it or not, I have never been a governor anywhere.

People ask, if elected, how would you lower our rent? Simple. The rent is too damn high. All right, so here's a depressing little ditty from CNBC. Speaking of economics and speaking of accounting. Minimum wage workers cannot afford rent in any U.S. state. Well, that's hard time. Nice. Yeah, that's great. Right. So full time minimum wage workers cannot afford a two bedroom rental anywhere in the U.S. and cannot afford a one-bedroom rental in 95% of U.S. counties. So there's a map here. And the map says how much you've got to make in order to get a two-bedroom rental house, right? This is the minimum you've got to make in order for you to rent a two-bedroom house.

Like in a state. In a state. In a state. The whole state, in a state, a whole state. So the whole state. So like in New York, you got to make $32 and a half an hour to rent a two bedroom apartment. And then that's 30% of your salary, right? Is that what you're saying? Yeah. Yep. Yep. So in Illinois, you got to make $21 an hour, 21 and a half almost. And then you look and you're like, okay, but what about like your garbage states that like, you know, like you could rent an apartment for like a nickel and like a bag of meth.

Mississippi, 14 and a half, almost $15 an hour you've got to make in Mississippi in order to, in order to survive. That's, that's appalling when you consider that minimum wage, you know, minimum wage is what, like seven and a half dollars an hour right now? Seven. Can you imagine like minimum wage, the whole idea when minimum wage was created, minimum wage, people have this bullshit idea that minimum wage is for high school kids, part-time jobs. But that's not most of the people who have minimum wage jobs. Most of the people in America who have minimum wage jobs have full-time minimum wage jobs they're trying to survive on.

They have to have more than one. In this article, did you happen to see, Cecil, I don't know if it was this week or last week, Did you happen to see, Cecil, I don't know if it was this week or last week, but McDonald's and Visa together put out a budgeting thing on their website that said, you know, any dream is possible if you plan for it, was their message. And it showed how a minimum wage worker from McDonald's could have like a place to live and like all these things. And they showed a sample budget. Did you happen to see this? I did not see this. My mouth is wide open, folks. Here's what's amazing about this, Cecil, is that it has on the income side has first job and then second job income. Yep. That makes sense. It assumes that you have to work. So it's like, yeah, anything's possible if you work two jobs.

Yeah. So like it automatically's like, yeah, anything's possible if you work two jobs. So like it automatically is like, okay, anything's possible. One job, not going to be enough. Then it has like all these crazy bullshit amounts, like an apartment for $600 a month, no heating bills, health insurance for $20 a month. Like the people who run this country have no idea what the people living in this country live through and try to survive off of it's not, it's not, not what minimum wage was for. It's almost like fucking Kodos and Kang run the country. They just, they just wander around and they say, well, you just use one of your two hands to pick it up. That's all. Two hands. You have two hands. You can work two jobs, you know?

But we have this weird fucking thing that happens in this country where people say, oh, yeah, well, it's a minimum wage job. But here's the thing. It's not minimum work, right? It's not a minimum amount of work. Those people work physically harder than

I do every day by not just a little bit, by a whole fucking lot, right? I used to do that job. I used to work. So I used to work in a plumbing supply house. I've worked in a, I worked in a caterer for many years. I was, I was working in catering. I've been working in industrial kitchens and in, in, in, in fine dining establishment kitchens. I've worked in, I I've worked as McDonald's. I've done that sort of work before. I have done, you know, for a while, I was one of those guys who did a vinyl siding. You know what I mean? I've done hard work in my life, right? I've done some of that hard work. I also have a job now that's not physical at all, right? So my job is not,

I don't have to do anything. Once in a while, I have to lift a book. You know what I mean? So it's- Right, yeah, intellectual labor now. It's 100% nothing strenuous in that sense. And so I know what it's like to work those jobs. I was tired every single day I came home. Every single day I came home and came home.

And I know you've worked these hard jobs too, Tom. I know you've done this stuff too. Being in sales isn't easy either because I know you've worked these hard jobs too, Tom. I know you've done this stuff too. You know, being in sales isn't easy either because I know that you worked, you're on your feet all day in sales, constantly walking around, spending your day, just waiting for somebody to come in so you could sell them some garbage. You constantly, I mean, you did it, you did it for years and that's tiring in itself. So this idea that, that it's, oh yeah, well it's only a minimum wage, but it's not minimum work. It's not a fucking tiny amount of work that they're doing. And the amount of money that we're paying them

is such a pittance. It's such a small amount of money that if you looked at this thing, one of the pieces in this report, and we'll link to the article, and the article links to this report. It's the first link in the article. And you can scroll through this,

but it's saying hourly wages by percent, for one and two bedroom housing wages. And you know, they, they talk about the average for one bedroom in the United States is $19 and 56 cents. And for two bedrooms, it's $23 and 96 cents. And then they go through to tell you what people make an hour. And they say food and beverage service workers make $11 and 24 cents on average an hour. I'm going to skip up a little bit, but you know, information and record clerks, 16, 70 an hour, motor vehicle operators, 18, 90 an hour, secretaries and administrative assistants, 19, 55 an hour. All of that is below the one bedroom, right? So you've got to make sure that you have somebody else in your, could you imagine if you,

even if you were just somebody who worked at McDonald's and you met somebody who also worked at McDonald's and the two got into a relationship and you wound up living together, you still would not be able to afford a one bedroom house. Yep. A one bedroom apartment. Not even close.

One of you would have to work another part-time job. You'd probably both have to work another part-time job. You'd probably both have to work another part-time job just to be able to do that. And that's the money that we give out to people. Yeah. And like people, and what if you want to have a family? Yeah.

Oh, no. No, come on. It is egregious. We are in a crisis situation with wage inequality in this country. And wage inequality and the cost of housing are a huge monster fucking problem. And the pandemic is really going to show how bad that problem is because a huge number of people have missed their first payments. They've missed their

second payments. And those payments are going to, that shit's going to come home to roost. And when it does, like there's going to be a massive spate of evictions, foreclosures, people are going to be put out on the street and they're not going to have anywhere to go. And that is coming. Like, that is not like, well, maybe that'll happen. That is 100% on the fucking way. And we've got no answer for this. Yeah. If they don't do anything about that. Yeah, if they don't do anything about that. Yeah, and they can. There's answers. They're not easy answers, but there's answers. The problem is that we

live in a society that is quarterly based, profit based, stock market based. Stock market's still doing well. Right? Yeah, stock market's crushing it. That tells you something. That tells you that the stock market is not an indicator of anything in this country. It's not an only thing it is, is I heard it.

The best, the best thing I ever described it as is it's a, it's a meter for measuring rich people feelings. That's what it is. And I, I saw that somewhere and it's perfect. It's absolutely perfect. That's what it is.

It's the rich people feeling a meter. And so that's what we see every week is that fucking thing is doing strong. And if that's doing strong, that's not an indicator of anything because we are at the largest amount of unemployment we've been at in a very, very, very long time. Yeah. We're talking about like best case scenario might be a little over 10% at the end of the year. Yeah. Like 10% unemployment is egregious. Yeah.

That is a nightmare situation for this country. Especially because we live in a country where a lot of people, we have limits on the social safety net in that there's time limits that people can only be on it for a certain amount of time. And then there's also limits when you talk about felonies. So if somebody has a felony, you're not allowed into that social safety net. And so those social safety nets aren't evenies. So if somebody has a felony, you can't get, you're not allowed into that social safety net. And so those social safety nets aren't even there for you if you have a felony.

So you're in a situation at this point where it could be very, very serious for a lot, a lot, a lot of people because we've essentially just turned them into a permanent underclass. Well, we're talking, all right,

like they're talking about the stimulus bill and probably this will come out Monday. So who knows what the stimulus bill will, it'll pass by now and then but probably not but like you know part part of the debate is whether or not to extend the um enhanced unemployment benefit so there's a current unemployment benefit of six hundred dollars a week and they're talking about whether or not to extend that. Like, coronavirus cases are surging. They're worse than they've ever been.

Still going strong, baby. Still going more than ever. If it was a good idea in March, it's the same good idea now. But like, we have a bullshit idea that like, well, you know, we don't want these people to have too much free money or, you know, they're going to get used to it

and, you know, blah, blah, blah. So like, we blame people for being poor. But then when you look at the data and you say, well, what jobs are available? It's like, well, jobs that keep you poor. Well, why the fuck do we have a system? Why the fuck do we allow ourselves to be taken advantage of like this by giant companies like McDonald's, et cetera, that pay people garbage wages while stacking up multi hundreds of millions of dollars in profits. It doesn't make any sense. And the answer, Cecil and I, we were talking about this before the show. The thing is that like, what I'm not sure we say out loud often enough is that

human beings and jobs are an unfortunate byproduct of corporations. Corporations do not exist in order for people to have high quality lives, good quality jobs, to have money. Corporations exist to make money. The people are an expense item like paper and pens and dishwashing liquid that if they could spend less on it, they would. We human beings are the expendable and unfortunate byproduct of a capitalist system. The system does not work for us. It literally works against us. And it cannot be any other way. It can't be because we have a stock market. And the stock market is a vast, like, you're right. Your quote is perfect. Like I've always said, like, if you ever want to tell me that people behave rationally with money or that people just behave rationally in general, then you cannot possibly point to the stock market. The stock market is ironclad evidence of the irrationality of the human experience.

Because it's really just feelings translated into dollar signs. And 100% we are in a government, in an economic system that values business, values the dollar and the profit way more than it ever values the worker. There's very few exceptions to that out there where there's, there's companies out there that are, you know, maybe small

businesses, even maybe some large businesses out there that do, uh, either they put on a dog and pony show to make it seem like they care about their worker, or they might genuinely do care about their worker. They might split their profits differently than other companies do. Um, but, but for the most part, these big companies couldn't give two fucks about you and they would get rid of you. There's no loyalty at all from on high. That loyalty never works downward. It always has to work upward. The loyalty always works its way up. And so we need to start realizing that and need to start realizing that and need to start realizing

that we're in a shitty, terrible relationship. We're in the worst relationship. We really are. We need to finish. We need to finish this relationship. What's also amazing to me, Cecil, is like there will be people who will defend corporations' indifference to people.

I've seen it a million times. And it's like, well, you do realize you're people. I've seen it a million times and it's like, well, you do realize you're people. Yeah, you're a person. Like, you and everyone you love is people. Yep. Right?

Like, why do I give a fuck if like McDonald's, which is an idea, it's not even real. Yeah. There is no such thing as McDonald's. They're not even a restaurant company. They're like a real estate company too. Yeah. Right. A franchisee real estate company. Yeah. McDonald's

isn't somebody I can hug. Yeah. You know, McDonald's isn't going to help me move. McDonald's isn't something I need to care about. But the idea that we all can't band together and look at the system and say, hey, it should really work for people because at the end of the day, that's what all of us are. Even rich people are people. Yeah. The idea that like we look around and we're just like we're indifferent to the suffering of us. Yeah. How am I?

How are we indifferent to our own suffering? There's nothing I care about more than my suffering. Yeah. What the fuck? I think you're right though. I think if we did get rid of, you know, that the stock market idea and you stopped, you stopped treating every quarter as a thing that you need to, you know, burst forward in profits and, and start caring about workers, you could change capitalism into a system that might be a little more caring. I don't know that you'll ever get there, right? But you could certainly

change it into something that would be a little more caring. And even a little more at this point would be better than nothing. I mean, if you're talking about even a place that is so barren and disgusting as like Arkansas and you can't even get a fucking

you can't even get with a low paying job, a place to live. What are you going to live in? I'll buy the moonshine jug out back. What is happening? They should pay you to live in those states. You should be like, look, I've got at least half of the teeth

that I was born with like that. And I wasn't born with any. Here's what George Soros, I know you're a fan of the show. Here's what you need to do, George. George, you need to start subsidizing people from blue states to move down to the garbage states and pay their rent for five or six years so we can vote all of those garbage people out.

That's what you need to do, George. You got plenty of money. You got plenty of money. You could subsidize enough people to go down and flip counties. I mean, how much, how hard would it be to flip some of these podunk shitty counties and get rid of all, you know, if you moved 400 people down there, how hard would it be to flip that county and flip the shit out of that county? You kidding me? There's more, there's more pigs than there are people in these counties. So you just go down there and flip them. Come on, George, do it. Move some of us down into the crappy South. We'll make it better. I guarantee.

Well, you know, I did think that, I did think that with all the people going work from home as a result of the pandemic and like the way that like companies were restructuring, so they weren't going to like bring workers back when this was over. I was really wondering like, is there going to be an exodus of skilled workers taking their job with them and moving to places that are more affordable to live? Sure. And like, I thought about that. And then the next day I saw an article where Facebook said like, hey, if you decide to move, we're going to adjust your salary based on the cost of living to the place that you move. No shit. What? So you got your Silicon Valley salary, but if you leave Silicon Valley

and take that to North Carolina, they are going to adjust your fucking income down so that you can't benefit from it. Even though you're providing the same service to the company, the same service which was valued at X dollars to that company, like they just don't was valued at X dollars to that company. Like they just don't want you to win. They don't like Facebook came out and basically said, fuck you. That's what that is. Fuck you. If you leave and try to better your situation,

we will penalize you for it. I'm standing here inside Flappy's, a diner in downtown Richmond, Virginia, where just a few moments ago, the unthinkable happened. Senator positive Barack Obama went negative. A computer model of the coffee cup shows that the five ounce cup that was labeled half empty actually had 2.57 ounces of fluid in it, making it more full than empty. No response yet from the Obama campaign, but the incident was captured by cell phone and is circulating on YouTube. Hey, do you like to top that off? Oh yeah, that would be great. Thank you very much. That's, my cup is half empty. Fox News will keep on this story or any story that shows Barack Hussein

Obama in a bad light. This story comes from The Intercept. Trump holds up a chart on Fox News will keep on this story or any story that shows Barack Hussein Obama in a bad light. This story comes from The Intercept. Trump holds up a chart on Fox News that shows he's lying, then lies about what it says. So this is the, so on Fox News Sunday, Chris Wallace, who I do like Chris Wallace, Chris Wallace interviewed the president. And he did to a large degree hold Trump's feet to the fire on many, on many issues. He kind of didn't let him wiggle too much. I think it was about as contentious as you can expect a conversation to be with a reporter, with a president like Trump, who would

just stand up and walk away if it got worse. Sure. You know, like you can't, I don't think he could have pushed him too much. I think you're probably right when it comes to that. I just feel like there was a lot of times that what Chris Wallace did, and I watched this whole 40 minutes time. I know you did too. When Chris Wallace was asking him questions, he would call him on the first lie, but then he would let the second lie slip. Or he never pressed the second time.

And so I saw a lot of people bending over backwards to bat this guy on the back But I I recognize too that there's only so much that you can do because there's only there's only Like you said he'll just get up and leave right right or he'll throw a tantrum or he'll change the subject And I also got to say too the last 10 minutes of this is chris wallace begging trump to like him He's saying look i'm I'm mean to other people too. Is there any way that you could really like me? Because I'm very fair when it comes to putting

other people's feet to the fire. You should like me, Mr. I was like, get the fuck out of here. I didn't care. See, I read that a little different. Yeah, it felt really pandering to me. I don't know. Maybe I'm just cynical, but it felt very pandering to me. I guess I read that part a little differently, but I could be wrong. So like I read that as like Chris Wallace saying like you attack everybody in the media, but like the attacks that you make are unfair because I behave the same way toward everybody that I behave toward you. So attacking me is, it's nonsensical. I hold Democrats feet to the fire and then flash like, so like, I think he' feet to the fire. Then he flashed like,

so like, I think he was trying to point out the hypocrisy of like him calling fake news on anybody who was hard on him by saying like, look, I'm hard on everybody. Like it's not like, like the narrative I think that, that Trump spins is that the media is particularly hard on him. And I think what Chris Wallace was trying to do, and maybe he was clumsy about it, was say, look, I'm hard on everybody. Yeah. So like,

that's just my job. It felt like validation to me. It felt like he was looking for some sort of validation. And maybe you're right. Maybe there was an underlying point that was missed on me.

But it's one of those things that since Fox is so sycophantic all the time, that I couldn't extricate that from it, right? If I see any other clip, everybody's always just waiting for him to come on their face. So it's just this constant, always Fox is being a sycophant. So when I see somebody doing something that may have some sort of ulterior motive to make them feel like they're trying to get a point

across, I miss the point because Fox is constantly gaping, waiting for him to fucking shoot his load in there. What I did love about the interview was that it was fact-checked in real time as you watched it. Yeah. So like they'd be talking and like the president would say something and then Chris Walsh would stop and be like actually yep here's what really is and like it was i did not you could not watch that and just watch it as an uninterrupted string when the president said some something that was bullshit it was like boom fact check right on screen we looked into it like when he tried to call uh biden out for saying well biden wants to defund the police and he's like and he's like get me the charter and they hand

him the charter and it's not on there. And he's like, hey, never got back to us with it because it doesn't exist. And he shows it on the, you know, it's like. Because no, because there's barely, I think there's like maybe one person in all of government at this point who tentatively agrees with defund the police.

So, you know, so there's not a single person on any side at this point that is saying defund the police. So when he says Biden said defund the police, no, Biden is just as much on their side as you are. Like, who the fuck are you kidding? Get the fuck out of here. But one of the things that happens in this interview is he gets called out for the coronavirus numbers. And, you know, it's always this, even, it doesn't matter who's in the fucking office. Somebody's going to try to spin their job as if they're doing their job in a competent way, right?

That's just what's going to happen, no matter what. You know, every single review that you get at a job, if you're, you know, an executive all the way down to everybody else who has a review process, you're going to try to make it look like you are doing the best job you possibly can and you made the best decisions you could at that time. That's just what, it's human nature and it's also the process of evaluation

which everybody is going to try to follow. So I don't begrudge Trump the fact that he's trying to make it seem like he's making the right decisions, right? Because everybody in that position would do the exact same thing. I totally get it. The problem is, is that he's lying about the decisions that he's making and that he's lying about the numbers and the very facts of the case. So that's the problem I have. I don't have a problem with him trying to say that he's trying

to do the best job he can. In fact, I would be very forgiving if he would be truthful and at least just say, I'm trying to do the best I can. Instead, he's lying and saying, I'm doing the greatest job in the world when he's not.

He's so weird about it too. Everything he does is so weird and awkward and like bizarre. They had this like arm wrestling match about the coronavirus thing. And like he shows them the graph and then Trump holds it like upside down at one point and like calls for a graph that shows different shit.

It's just like, it's a different graph that answers a different question. Yeah, and we're still not number one on, which he said we were. Right. So he calls him out and says, we're seventh in the world in, I think it's in cases,

deaths per 100,000. We're seventh in the world or something like that. And he says, well, no, we're number one in that. I want to see that. And he calls. And he's basically, if he could get a handful of this girl's ass who's going to get this stuff, he would. The way he treats this person, the way he's just like. Garçon.

I would. Go get me the charts. Hey, you, you had charts. I want the fucking charts over here. And they go get the charts and they come back. And he's holding it upside down like a dipshit. And yeah,

because it's going up in one way. When he turns it upside down, all the cases mysteriously go away. That's where he got that from is somebody one time turned the thing upside down on him. He said, oh, one day they will mysteriously go away.

It'll be like magic. One time he heard, sometimes you just got to flip the script. And he just like flipped the script. Exactly. Literally'll be like magic. One time he heard sometimes you just gotta flip the script. And he just like flipped the script. Exactly. Literally flipped it on him. So in any case, he looks at this thing and he says, no, we're number one in the world. And then they showed the graph that he held up, which was

tallying up a totally different thing. And then it even showed us as number four. Yeah. So no matter how you cut it like if you answer the wrong question we're still not where he said we were it's amazing then like i have to i have to say like he has been on a fucking crazy like crazy person rampage about how good he did on a test that detects dementia yeah not understanding that that test is not a test of mental acuity.

Yeah. It's not a test of like how sharp you are. It's meant to be easy. I saw a fucking amazing tweet from a doctor who said, I give these tests all day long.

If you don't get a perfect score, we take away your driver's license. And there was like, he was talking about it again today. And like he, like he went on and on of Fox today

talking about this test and like how great he did on this test. And he kept like repeating over this like five word phrase. He's like, you know, one of the things you have to do, it's very difficult. It's very difficult. One of the things you have to do is they give you five words, man, woman, child, whatever.

He's a camera car or whatever. Camera car or whatever. Yeah. And like, you have to memorize and then they'll come back later and ask you to repeat it back to him. And he's like, a lot of people can't do that. You get extra points if you get it in the right order.

And it's like, no, it's a binary yes or no. Did you get, don't get extra. There's no extra credit on the fucking MCOA test. Like that's not how that works. My favorite part of that whole interview that he did today was he messed up the repetition of it once. So he said the repetition of it and then he said it again a minute later and he didn't repeat what he had just said.

He got, he gave himself the test, Tom, and he failed it today. Yeah. And he's also like, it's so funny because it today. Yeah, and he's also like, it's so funny because he's bragging about it and he's like, and they're like, whoa, how did you do this?

Nobody's ever done this. It's like, nobody's ever remembered five things in sequence. Are you fucking kidding me? I could do that. I'm a fucking numbskull. I could fucking do that.

Hundreds and hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of people could do that. My fucking, my nine-year-old daughter could do that. No hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of people could do that my fucking my nine year old daughter could do that no fucking problem she doesn't forget a goddamn thing

like and I love too that he's bragging about his memory but when he opens it up he's like took the test whatever they call it and it's like

you forgot the name of the test you forgot the name of the test and you're bragging about how great your memory is and then he's

and throughout the whole thing he's attacking biden now biden is hiding in his bunker again projection which is what trump did trump hid in his bunker and that one day when there was mad protests outside and he was like peeking out the windows asking the security the security people if they could go outside and shoo the protesters away with fucking tear gas and helicopters. And then he's so he's projecting there and then he's projecting here, too, when he keeps on saying Biden isn't mentally all there. He keeps saying the same thing. Look, I I'm not saying that Biden or Trump are mentally all there. Either of them comes right down to it. But but genuinely, I think they're both on the same playing field. I think they're both you know, they're probably both a little bit foggy at this point.

They're both really old. I was never really wanted Biden to be in there in the first place, frankly. But Trump is making it seem like he was accepted to Mensa with this. You know, that's what he's making it feel like. Yeah. He's talking about the MCOA as if it's like this big fucking deal and it's like-

He got into Princeton or something. He got the highest score he could on the ACT. It literally is a pre-screening for dementia. That's all that it is. Like,

if you don't fail that test, that means that so far you don't have dementia. Yeah. That's it. Like, it doesn't mean like, well,

it's not like most people fail that test. Yeah. That's it. It doesn't mean like, well, it's not like most people fail that test. Yeah. God damn. I, but people are going to buy it, dude. People are going to be like,

oh, I took a, the president took a thinky person's test. He's a super thinky person. he can remember five things even if you ask him about it later. He's a super genius.

Look at him go. that's, that's going to be our new qualification for president. You have to be 35 years old at least, be an American citizen, and be able to remember

five things. I want to talk quickly. I don't know if you saw it today, Tom. Did you get a chance to see Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez dress the house for?

Yes. Yeah. So today, Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, this last week, there's a guy by the name of Yoohoo or something. What is his name? What's his name?

Yoho. Yoho. Yoho. What's his fucking name? Fucking Yoohoo or whatever. Yokel. He looks like, seriously, looks like the fucking, the guy who's going to play boss hog in the Dukes of Hazzard reboot. Guaranteed.

I didn't see him. Guaranteed. I got to look at him. Although to be honest, there's no way he would jail any white guys. So who are we kidding? But anyway. He does. Right? Doesn't he look like a boss? He looks like every city councilman in every Southern state in every movie you've ever seen. That's what he looks like. But anyway, this guy is walking by Ocasio-Cortez and this is seen by reporters, right? So this isn't just Ocasio-Cortez who's saying this. This is seen by reporters and it's seen by a right-leaning reporter from the Hill, okay?

So the Hill is there standing there talking to someone and I don't know who was being interviewed. I'm not sure if it was AOC or it was you who were being interviewed, but someone walked by someone else. I think Ocasio-Cortez was being interviewed because no one wants to talk to this guy. And so this guy walks past

and as he walks past, he calls her dangerous and awful and yada, y talk to this guy. And so this guy walks past and as he walks past, he calls her dangerous and awful and yada, yada, yada. And she ignores him. She turns away from him and she continues to talk. And as he comes back out, he calls her a fucking bitch. He says, you fucking bitch. And then he leaves or whatever.

And she doesn't say anything about it. She doesn't react to it. She doesn't say anything about it. He comes on the floor the next day because the Hill prints it. The Hill is like, fuck you. I saw it happen. I'm going to print it. I'm going to tell people it happened. Bunch of people then went with the reporting that the Hill came out with. And so he comes onto the floor and he gives this speech where he says, yeah, you know, I'm a very passionate guy, but I have a daughter and I have I have a wife and I would never

say anything to hurt anybody Ocasio-Cortez comes out today and literally eviscerates this guy it's amazing it's just

it's 10 minutes you want to see it's on our Twitter feed if you dig on our Twitter feed you'll find it it's really quite awesome it's 10 minutes

you'll want to listen to but one of the things that she does is she says you know you basically hid behind your family as a shield and it's pathetic. It's a sad, pathetic thing that you've done to hide your misogyny behind the shield of the women in your family. And it's,

it's gross and disgusting. And it, and what it is, is it's, it's one of those moments where you get a chance to see somebody who has had enormous privilege throughout his life get called on it. And the way he reacts is everything. The way he reacts is absolutely everything. It's a blueprint to how you react when you have privilege and you're called out on it. And her response, she's like, I'm not accepting the apology because it's not an apology

because he didn't even acknowledge that he did it. Yeah. He did not. He came out and said, I can't properly, he said, I can't apologize because I didn't do it. Yeah. Yeah, you did. Yeah. Just like own your shit too. Like what I understand is like, this could be like, if he came out and said, you know what? I was just wrong. I was, I should never have said that. That was a stupid thing for me to do. I was all worked up, which is no excuse. And I was wrong

and I'm really sorry. And I got to do better and I'll do better from now on. That's, that's not okay. I'm, I should know better. That would be a moment where like people could look at him and be like, yeah, you fucked up, but I could still hold some respect for you. Sure. And it wouldn't blow up into this opportunity for his, for somebody on his side that he is clearly not aligned with to fucking roll him over. And she just, I mean, she like, this is not a woman that like is ineloquent. Oh, she is incredibly eloquent. She's amazing. So to underestimate her is just a grotesque mistake.

Like what a stupid fucking thing to do. He made this bed. Like what a fucking numbskull this man is. He made this problem for himself. I can't wait for her to get older and for her to get more power in these places because she's a far left leaning voice. She's somebody who I think is constantly doing the right things in politics, which is antagonizing the other side in a way that is not offensive, but is in every way pushing their buttons. They would be absolutely apoplectic if she was nominated for president. I mean, could you imagine? You know, at the point- Oh, they would lose their minds. I mean, and this is not something that is out of the realm of possibility.

She has many years between her and that age range. She could do a lot of things between now and then. She came on strong in the last couple years. She could easily catapult herself to a position of some pretty great leadership in the House. Maybe she takes over a Senate seat instead. Maybe she, you know, there's a lot of things that she could do to move into that position and they would just be beside themselves because they cannot stand her. They cannot stand her at all. And she has done a lot of, I think she's done a lot of great things to

push buttons in the right way. You know, I remember Tom, do you remember when we were covering this? And I don't remember if it was everyone's a critic or if it was this show, but do you remember when Obama was in office and he was given the state of the address and people were screaming at him? And it was the first time that's ever happened in our history where people were yelling and you and I were clutching our pearls with how awful that was. We couldn't believe that they were doing something like that. Oh, the good old days. This is a congressman calling another congresswoman

a fucking bitch on the steps of fucking Congress. There can't be anything lower than that. I get Tom and I, we fucking, we swear and we're shitty and whatever, but I'm not in fucking Congress, man. If I was in Congress,

I would have a totally different demeanor. There needs to be something, there's something to be said about a civility that has to happen there. And it was in Congress, I would have a totally different demeanor. There needs to be something, there's something to be said about a civility that has to happen there. And it has not had, it's been, it's been turned down. The bar is so low now. It's a pathetic, low, disgusting bar where something like this is allowed. You know, a while back, well, what happened a couple of years ago? Cause gosh, my memory with all the Trump stuff, I can't remember. But somebody, I think, called someone else a liar or something. And there was this big uproar because a Republican got called a liar.

But you could call a congresswoman a fucking bitch and nothing happens. Well, they hate her in part. They hate her for, I think, four reasons that, like, just are absolutely, they cannot handle it. They hate her because she's a progressive, for sure. But I think that's the smallest reason. And I don't know this, right? But I think they hate her because she's a progressive. I think they hate her because she's young. I think they hate her because she's a woman. And I think mostly they hate her because she's an attractive woman. I think that drives them up the fucking wall. I really do. Because there is a bias against, particularly against attractive women in positions of intellectual power and authority in this country, especially young women, young, attractive women, it drives people fucking crazy because like, it's the

ultimate misogyny test, right? Like somebody that you're like attracted to has power over you. Like that just fucking sends a certain type of person like off the fucking rails. They cannot handle that dynamic. And like, she knows it and she fucking pokes at it you know and she she you know she she owns that shit and she like ever like like this is a great example he called her a bitch she's like bitches get shit done yeah like she's just like yeah i'm just gonna take that she rolled with it and every time she does and then the dancing thing was a good example too yeah exactly and today when she when she spoke on the, it's really great because she talks about how, you know, you, she's saying to him, you have a family, but I'm also someone's daughter and you called me a fucking bitch. And that's what people forget is that they, they forget that

their world, their world, the world is outside past their nose, right? They forget that they think they're so self-absorbed that they think that they're the only one that exists or their family is the only one that exists. And they have no empathy for anybody outside their tiny little bubble. Those people are inhuman. And I can't understand how somebody with such a lack of empathy could possibly get elected. And then I realized he's from Florida and I thought it made sense. It made sense. So, we want to thank our patrons.

Of course, we want to thank all our patrons. And we'd really love to thank our newest patrons, but Ian didn't put the patron names in the notes. So, we don't know all of your names yet. We don't know who you did. Because of Ian. And it's Ian's fault. It's all Ian's fault. Which is ironic

because doesn't Ian get paid because we have patrons? You know what? I'm just saying. I think you're right. That if anybody was wondering who to blame. If you haven't had

your name read yet, be sure to send us an email at dissonance.podcast at gmail.com and Ian will write you an apology this week. He will write you an apology. I'll take it a step further. If you want to become a patron right now, Ian will write you an apology, even though he hasn't fucked it up yet. Even though he hasn't, he hasn't messed it up yet. So if you want an apology from Ian,

become a patron right now and Ian will send you an apology. For this week and the last two weeks, we are sending personalized apologies from Ian. He's going to charge us for it though. It's so funny, so fuck it. So fuck it, yeah. It's worth it.

It's like when you order, it's like when we're at the studio and we order, we look at each other and fuck it, yeah. It's worth it. It's like when you order, it's like when we're at the studio and we order, we look at each other, we say, yeah, let's get two pizzas. So, but we will, we promise we'll read your names next week.

We do want to really, truly thank you. The amount of money we just spend in cable, cable internet a month and other internets a month is obscene. And we have to pay rent

where we're at and things like that. Everything that we do to try to get the show to you and to try to make sure that the show is as good as possible, all that stuff costs money. We want to thank you very much for your generous donations. The money also goes to a little peace of mind just in case one of us loses

our jobs, which is, in this climate, possible. It's not a 0% chance. Definitely not a case one of us loses our jobs, which is in this climate possible. Yeah, it's not a 0% chance. Definitely not a 0% chance. Tom and I for a long time have had day jobs and it may be one day that we have a podcasting day job, which sounds like a nightmare. It's terrifying.

But it's something that we may have to resort to. And so we thank everybody who has come out to support us and make sure that if we do that, the, the safety net is there for us. So we want to thank you very much for that. So we got a little bit of email. One thing we got, we got a message.

This is a patron message from Todd with three D's. And he says that he's a hypocrite. He said, you know, I just wondering if you guys do this. He's a hardcore Dodgers fan. He goes to the game and he bats on one of the players and the player does something and he says,

he says, the guy says, first I want to thank God and I yelled, fuck yeah and then I immediately crossed my chest so that my foul mouth wouldn't jinx the good news. I love that part. He says, I'm a fucking atheist. So it was pure nonsense. Do you guys ever find yourself accidentally reverting to childhood God stuff by accident? And I do all the time because I say, God damn it.

I say, God, I say, Jesus. Actually, it's so funny because when I first started meeting atheists, one of the atheists I met, he went to University of Chicago. And it was one of the first people I met outside of college that was an atheist. And he used to say gods. When he would, when instead of saying, you know, when you would say, oh God, he would say, oh gods, he would always pluralize it. And to me, that was one of those things that really turned a lot of heads because people thought he was some sort of primitive fuck. And you turn around and say, yeah, but you believe in one too. What are you doing?

Yeah. I'm more inclusive. Fuck you. It was a liberal institution. Exactly. But it was one of those things that really, really, I thought was actually a really interesting way to do it, to try to flip it on its head. And I know that I think, I don't know that I've ever tried to consciously try to change my speech patterns to get away from that because it's just how it was raised. You know, you would

exclaim Jesus or God when something would go wrong or when you were incredulous or things like that. That's just how it was raised. So I still do it in fact one of our early bad itunes reviews i think was someone saying atheists still say oh my god no thank you and then they did i definitely use it as an exclamatory like i was like oh jesus christ yeah yeah i love that i love that like it crossed his chest so his foul mouth wouldn't, because that's, wouldn't jinx, because that's both just, like, religious and also, like, superstitious. Sure, you're dipping into some weirdness there.

That's great. Like, that's, like, crossing all kinds of layers. All the bones. Do you do any superstition stuff? Do you, like, knock on wood or anything? You know, I don't, I don't do, I can't think of anything that I,

that I do that's terribly superstitious. Haley knocks on wood all the time. You know, I would walk under a ladder. I would step on a crack, all those weird,

dumb things. Yeah. You know, because, because when you say them out loud, how on earth could you possibly believe it? Right?

Once you say it, once you speak it, how do you look back on it and say, no, that's, that's, that's fucking,

that's fucking nonsense. Yeah. Right. Yeah. I, I don't, I don't think I have any, but I will throw salt over my shoulder

just because I hope it gets in someone's eyes. You know, just to, I just hope I blind someone. I just think it's funny. I miss my calling. I do for no reason. I'm just peppering the world with salt.

I throw salt over my shoulder hoping I blind funny. I miss my calling. I do for no reason. I'm just peppering the world with salt. I throw salt over my shoulder, hoping I blind someone because I miss my calling as a police officer with a riot gun. So we got this message from so many people. We got it tweeted at us. We got it sent to us. It looks like the coronavirus sex rules

or sex suggestions from, I think it was British Columbia came out. And they again included like New York, included glory holes. So as the glory hole guys, we got a bunch of people saying, hey, by the way, glory holes. And yeah, look,

we've endorsed glory holes a long time ago. You don't need our approval. We have a studio named after it. We have, so a hundred percent, we are a hundred percent behind endorsing of Glory Holes. We're ahead of the curve as we flatten the curve. Absolutely. We got a message from Viced Rhino

and he was saying, he was saying, yeah, I actually started my YouTube channel because a bunch of atheists that I watch for atheist content started parroting right-wing talking points. Yeah, no shit, man. It's funny because it's funny because a lot of the YouTube atheists really sort of flip their shit. And, uh,

I remember Gamergate was a huge thing that they went nuts about and, you know, they were anti feminism. I remember when we went on Seth's show, if you go read the comments, go read the comments from when we were on Seth's show years ago, the first time we ever met Seth, we were on his show. Actually, Seth came on our show first, and then we went on his show after. And he was a really great host. And I remember Tom said something to the effect of, I don't know how you can be a humanist and not be a feminist. And that's a very simple concept that is, in my opinion, irrefutable. in my opinion, irrefutable. And, uh, and people just went to fucking town after us. They attacked us. They were shitty in the comments. And it's because at that point, and I don't know if it's still true, but at that point, Seth had a lot of audience in his, in his favor. That was, that was very gamer gate. Didn't like women insult types. And so that's what we deal with when we're on YouTube. So I'm glad vice Rhino that you have a YouTube channel that is, that is not doing that sort of thing, because that's where, you know, you see it all the time on YouTube. So I'm glad vice Rhino that you have a YouTube channel that is, that is not doing that

sort of thing because that's where, you know, you see it all the time on Twitter. People will always say, oh my gosh, atheism sucks. And it's because what's been projected to them is not humanism. And it's not, uh, it's not any kind of caring about human beings. It's just God doesn't exist. Well, God doesn't exist as an easy question to fucking answer. Yeah. What's on your second video? Yeah, exactly. Like, okay. Yeah. Easy. If I want an eloquent elaboration of that point, I can watch some Hitchens videos.

Yeah. Like nobody did that better. Yeah. What are you adding to the fucking program? Exactly. We got a message from Sealy and Sealy sent us a private message going through some kind of difficult, tough times saying that we really help this year, especially. And we're trying to do some goofy stories and some interesting stories. We're staying away from COVID stories because there's nothing

really interesting to report. We will mention when some good news comes around, but most of the time there's really not much to report except for there's more deaths and more stuff. So, but we're, but we're staying away from that. We are talking a little bit about politics, but we are trying to sprinkle in some goofy stories to give people a, I don't know, a ray of hope. And so we're happy that it's pulling you through there. And we're happy for anybody who is finding some solace in that. We got a message from Sarah and Sarah said, if we ever come to Montreal, they will take us somewhere to eat. And they enlist a bunch of restaurants. Sarah's been a fan of the show for a very long time. Sarah, we will definitely look you up if we go into Montreal ever. That's a place I really want to go. I know that they say

Quebec is a touristy city. I will be a tourist, so I will want to see it. I'm okay with that. I will want to see it. I like touristing. It's fun. Got a message from Adam from Kentucky, and he said- It's crazy. When he moved from Arizona to Ohio to a small town south of Dayton, he was basically driving down the road and he went to a farmer's market and he fucking heard a large crash against the side of his car and a peacock smashing up against the side of his car and then chasing down the road and kept smashing up against it until he got out. And he walked over to the farmer's market. He said, Hey, what's going on? And they said, Oh, is the peacock attack in your car? He said, yeah. And they said, is your car red? And he said, yeah. And they just smiled

and turned away. What the fuck, Peacock? Oh, you got to move, bro. You got to move. Aaron sent in a joke. Aaron sent in a good pun. He said, the last resort,

we talked about this last time, Tom and I start in a bar called The Last Resort. He said it would need a drinking establishment in the basement called The Low Bar. I really love that.

I love it. It's very good. I love it. That's a show me your tits The Low Bar. I really love that. I love it. It's very good. I love it. That's a show me your tits. That's not a shit tits. That's a show me your tits. We got a message from Graham. Graham said,

if you want a real psycho birds, look into cassowaries. And I know we were saying emu bad. I guess it's emu. You're supposed to say mu, not, it's not emu. Cause I guess they only live in Australia. So we're supposed to go with what they say,

which is emu. You know what? I don't think they're supposed to go with what they say which is emu. I don't think they're going to be offended. Yeah. We got corrected on it. I will change my pronunciation when an emu writes me a letter. When an emu sends me an email. An emu comes over here.

Could you imagine if we would have done that in Australia? If we would have done the emu thing and we just said emu on stage, everyone would have booed at us. Everyone would have booed at us. Everyone would have screamed at us, thrown a fucking shoe at us. But I saw this week,

someone posted on our Facebook page, on our Facebook fan page, someone posted a video of a guy brining an entire 80 pound ostrich and then smoking it in a smoker for 16 hours. And they show them eating it and they show what they, the guy's the first time he's ever,

he's ever actually worked with a bird like this. And he said, oh, I would figure out different things to do with it in the future. But, you know, so, but he, he, they tried it and he said, it actually tastes like beef. They were, it was, it's crazy. So. I've, I've had ostrich a number of times

and it is very much a beefy. Yeah. It tastes very much like beef. It looks like beef. Yeah. It's rad. Like it's, it's delicious. I will say this, that the, the bird that he had,

it looked like a fucking dinosaur. It was so goddamn big. It was over a hundred pounds. They had to literally cut with a grinder one of the shelves out of the smoker in order to fit it in there. That's how big this fucking bird is. It's so worth your 10 minutes of watching this movie. It's so

worth it. So check it out. That's amazing. It's on the fan page. So that is going to wrap it up for this week. We are going to be back next week with another show. We are waiting to record our live stream, so I can't tell you how great our live stream was now, but I'm sure

it was great. It's always great. You can check it out at 9 p.m. Central. Tonight we're going on a little later, 9.30, but you can still check out all our live streams in perpetuity on YouTube, Facebook, all those places that you would normally check out a saved video. They're all there for you to check out.

And if you're a patron, you get these audio versions delivered to your stream every week. But we want to thank everybody for listening and everybody for watching. Come join us on our live streams on Thursday nights, 9 p.m. Central Time. And we're going to leave you like we always do

with the Skeptic's Creed. Credulity is not a virtue. It's fortune cookie cutter, mommy issueno babylon bullshit couched in scientician double bubble toil and trouble pseudo quasi alternative acupunctuating pressurized stereogram pyramidal free energy healing water downward spiral brain dead pan sales, late night info docutainment, Leo Pisces, cancer cures, detox, reflex, foot massage, death in towers, tarot cards, psychic healing, crystal balls, Bigfoot, Yeti, aliens, churches, mosques, and synagogues, temples, dragons, giant worms, Atlantis, dolphins, truthers, birthers, witches, wizards, vaccine nuts, shaman healers, evangelists, conspiracy, doublespeak, stigmata, nonsense.

Expose your signs. Thrust your hands. Bloody, evidential, conclusive. Doubt even this. The opinions and information provided on this podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. All opinions are solely that of Glory Hole Studios LLC. Cognitive dissonance makes no representations as to accuracy, completeness, currentness, suitability, or validity of any information and will not be liable for any errors, damages, or

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