Cognitive Dissonance - Episode 554: Rona Rudy

Episode Date: December 14, 2020

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Today's show is brought to you by AdamandEve.com. Go to AdamandEve.com right now and you'll get 50% off just about any item. All you have to do is enter the code word GLORY, G-L-O-R-Y, at checkout. Be advised that this show is not for children, the faint of heart, or the easily offended. The explicit tag is there for a reason. Recording live from Glory Hole Studios in Chicago, this is Cognitive Dissonance. Every episode we blast anyone who gets in our way. We bring critical thinking, skepticism, and irreverence. Too many topics that makes the news, makes it big, or makes us mad.

It's skeptical, It's political. And there is no welcome at. This is episode 554 of Cognitive Dissonance. And this is the, ha ha, Rudy Giuliani's got the Rona. Ha ha ha. And so does Jenna Ellis. Ha ha ha ha. Take that fucking strike force or whatever you guys are calling yourselves.

Did you ever see, did you see him fucking telling the people that are testifying next to him to take the mask off? Did you see that this week? He asks pretty forcefully. He basically says, I don't want to make you uncomfortable. Could you, I can barely hear you.

Is there any way that you would take the mask off? And then the woman confirms with everybody in the room, you can hear me, right? And they said, yeah. And then she says, oh, okay, well, I'm going to keep it on. He said, oh, okay. Good for her. Good for her. Because that's one of those situations where that sort of like indirect social pressure, most people would be like, oh shit. And then take their mask off. That's just, we're used to acquiescing to what sound like reasonable demands without like, we do it without even thinking, you know? So good for her. I did see the videos of Rudy Giuliani fucking dabbing at his nasty, sweaty. Can we talk about, is there any more, any person more physically fucking repellent than Rudy Giuliani dabbing his fucking weird sweaty penis skull with that fucking old man rag and swiping sweat on the people next to him.

Have you seen these videos? Yes. Yeah. It would only be grosser if he had a squeegee and he was just squeegeeing up and just like, like swinging it. You know, when you have a squeegee and you're doing your window and you go outside and you, and you do that,

that sort of flick of the wrist, like he, if he did that to his wife, that would be only one hair grosser than what he did. What he was saying. That was his wife. I don't know. I don't know.

Whoever he, whoever he gropes with his fucking sweaty old hand. That's disgusting disgusting it is absolutely foul so like there's like two videos where he takes out his nasty old man rag from his fucking geriatric pocket and he like blows his nose and then wipes his head with the same rag and then runs it across his mouth and like schmutz it it on other people. Like, yeah, we are in a pandemic. You're literally, you are fucking typhoid Rudy. Are you fucking kidding me?

He's amazing, dude. He's amazing. He's Rona Rudy. And then the other one, he's sitting next to this woman. I don't think he's married. He's sitting next to this woman and he dabs his whole sweaty person like he's getting yeah he fucking cleans himself with that thing like he's stepping out of the shower at the gym he sponge baths himself while he's sitting there with his own sweat he

sponge baths his own sweat on him yeah with that same nasty hand he reaches over and just like pets this woman's arm and i was just wanting to throw up for her. Oh yeah. It's disgusting. It's absolutely foul. And the, this guy is just, he's just, he's just exuding this sweat and he's wiping this fucking, like you said, the old man rag. Have you, have you ever, so did your dad use one of those? Did your dad use an old man rag? He did not in? No. Okay. So my dad, my whole life, used one of the, it was a white hanky. He used to carry white hankies in his pocket all the time, and he would blow his nose. Well, sometimes, you know, one of his kids had to do the laundry or whatever. And so you take the laundry and you empty it out, and then you pull out the fucking

snot rag, and no shit, Tom, you open up at a crispy. It's like crispy. It's like straight up, straight up. Like, like you,

you open it up and it's like, Oh, it's, it's worse. It's worse because it's multiple loads of juice in there or whatever. It's like, it's like the cum sock for a week and a half or whatever. And you just immediately,

first off, it can stand up in a wind. It's that stiff. It's so starched. It could stand up in a wind and then you got to throw it. And when you throw it, you could knock some paint off

or something. You basically, it's like a throwing star. It's like a jook throwing star. It's just disgusting. It's star. It's just disgusting. It's disgusting. It's so foul. My dad used to do that all the time.

He used to carry around a snot rag. And I don't know what the fuck would possess somebody to not just carry a few fucking, you know. Kleenex, if you've got a fucking boogery nose, Jesus. And also, my dad smoked for, you know, a bajillion years. And any smoker out there knows for sure that you're not just – you're coughing up big, yellow, nasty fucking lung loogies. And he was – that fucking thing was just plastered with it.

You didn't want to get it the day of because it's still wet. It's still damp. Which is worse. Is it worse when it's fresh? It's worse when it's fresh because when it's at least crusty, then you just think, okay, that's disgusting. But then there's sort of like a, there's like a viscosity to it when it's not. And that's unpleasant.

Oh. So, yeah. Yeah. So I just think whenever I see Rudy waving that fucking, the fucking flag of COVID surrender around that he's's constantly doing i just think of my dad and how disgusting he was and i just think rudy's twice as disgusting rudy's like uncle fester he's seriously i look at him like holy shit your uncle fester he grins with that weird no lip grin and he's like he's gonna put his hanky in his mouth and it's gonna light on fire

uncle fester did with the light bulb he's got the fucking rona now and he couldn like, he's going to put his hanky in his mouth and it's going to light on fire. Uncle Fester did with the light bulb. Well, he's got the fucking Rona now and he couldn't fucking be happy. I couldn't be happier about it. Jenna Ellis has the Rona. He did say today from the hospital, he's in the hospital with the Rona. So it's not like he's got the Rona.

They took him to hospital. They took him to hospital for treatment right away. Yeah. So he's in the fucking million years old. Yep. Yep. 78 years old. And his body is made,

obviously made of exuding garbage. You know, there's a lot of 78 year olds out there that are in so much better shape than Rudy Giuliani. He looks like, he looks like fucking, uh, the old guy at the end of fucking big trouble in little China. That's what he looks like to me.

There are exhumed corpses that look better than Rudy Giuliani. Are you fucking kidding me? Fucking asshole. I love that this is happening at the same time that the entire case, case in fucking scare quotes,

the 50 failed cases, 50 failed cases, 50 failed cases that the Trump administration has tried to put forward, including the case they put forward to the Supreme Court seeking injunctive relief to try to invalidate

the Pennsylvania count. And the fucking Supreme Court with no dissenters issued a one sentence reply, which is basically like, no. And that was the whole thing. The Supreme Court swiped left. They did not match.

You did not match on that one. You don't even get to send a message. No. You know what? They swiped left so hard, they deleted the fucking app from your phone. That's it. They came up.

They became celibate. They became... I'm sorry. That's a no so hard. I actually stitched my vagina closed. My vagina is closed like Rudy Giuliani's nose. The Trump administration's final days are are a tremendously beautiful

microcosm of cascading failures it's like a fucking game of political mousetrap it's like one fell like the boot kicks the candle yes hits the fucking bowling ball, which like rolls down. It's amazing. It's like you got four seasons and a tiny desk and 50 failed fucking lawsuits. Then your idiot fucking Corona denying lawyers all get the fucking Rona.

It's just amazing. And at the very end of the whole thing, a boot kicks away all the potential Pfizer vaccine we could have oh let's talk about that we could have but we instead it just kicks it away because you know because I don't know because Trump didn't you know there is some some argument to be made that you could say well uh you know maybe we weren't banking on that one alone but this was one of the ones in operation warp speed this is one of the ones you should have been banking on that one alone, but this was one of the ones in Operation Warp Speed.

This is one of the ones you should have been banking on because you kind of funded it. So I think that instead of trying to fucking, you know, play the ponies, you try to see if you can seal up more of the one you sort of are convinced is going to be the winner. Well, the other thing is too is they offered them 100 million extra doses.

You're already buying some amount of doses. Yeah. So if you're buying some amount of some doses of a thing, that you have to presume that there's value to be had in the initial purchase. You've got 327 million people in the United States. They each need two doses of this thing. What the fuck are you turning this away for?

What the fuck are we ever turning? What are we worried? We're going to have too much vaccine. If you have too much, then you can say, hey, we have too much and then resell the extra. I guarantee there's going to be fucking buyers. What fucking world do we live in? We're in the middle of the fucking darkest part of the covid winter and earlier in the summertime you're like yeah i want to make sure i don't have too much

vaccines yeah i wouldn't want to have too many vaccines for this terrible illness ravaging the world yeah what kind of leadership is this well and and this just goes into i mean i don't even know what you think is a trump supporter at this point all right what do you think is a trump because on the one hand uh china is the culprit right so china is the one who who is the culprit and let's be let's be honest china you know china should have certainly shared more about this than they did. Absolutely, 100% early on. But they clearly did to Trump because he let that leak to that guy in February. He at least knew something about it ahead of time, right?

So on the one hand, it's China's fault. But on the other hand, it's going to go away. And then it's just going to disappear but we're testing more so there's more cases but you don't need to wear a mask but then there's going to be a vaccine but I'm not going to take it because I don't like vaccines

I don't even know there's so much cognitive dissonance at this point can you just start cross multiplying all the different conflicting views you have until you come to like there's so much cognitive dissonance at this point. Can you just start cross multiplying all the different conflicting views you have until you come to one particular view about this? Because it feels like a tennis match is going on in their head. I don't believe it's a real thing. Oh, it is. But Trump's doing a great job. I don't believe it's a real thing. Oh, it is. But Trump's doing a great job. I mean, how do you even fucking look at yourself? Yeah, I actually am. I'm right there with you, Cecil. I've come to the conclusion that there is

no point. There's no stance. So I find myself realizing the truth that I am not in opposition to a story, a narrative, a cohesive stance. What the Trump administration and these fucking supporters of the administration have is a loose amalgamation of random conspiracy theories. They're for real, none of which necessarily match or even interconnect in meaningful ways. So you've got people that don't think it's real. You've got other people that think it's real, but it's not a big deal. You've got other people that think it's real and it's a big deal, but it was started by a lab in China and the Democrats are pushing it. And, you know, so there's, it's, it's just, it's a fucking spider web of roughly interconnected bullshit that somehow many of these fucking Trump supporters hold pieces of all simultaneously at the same time. And you're like, how the fuck can you possibly hold?

I am not smart enough to be a conspiracy theorist at that level. At some point for me, the push pins would start popping out of the fucking bulletin board. There'd be strings flying everywhere. I'd lose my shit. Exactly. I just find it so it's just such a stupid position i have but now even with even if you are going to give trump the benefit of the doubt on

any of the stuff that we've done that we you know and and you and i have been pretty we've been very critical of the entire thing on the entire uh uh response but even if we're going to give him the tiniest bit of credit by saying, okay, well, yeah, you did do Operation Warp Speed, you still fucked that up, man. Like, you still fucked it up. Yeah. Operation Warp Speed is not, first of all, the very

first vaccine that was produced was produced outside of the rubric of Operation Warp Speed. We talked about that a couple of shows ago. And then they tried to take credit for it, even though it was not a part of Operation Warp Speed. So it's like, all right, cool. Thanks for trying to take credit for something

that your operation didn't have anything at all to do with. And then you're going to build these vaccines, and that's great. And they're going to be produced by a number of different companies. And that's also amazing. And it really is a technological marvel and i think that's tremendous and good for all of us good for all of us as as humanity for fucking putting our heads together and figuring out

many solutions out of this problem but what world are you fucking living in when you're like i'm gonna pass on any amount of this any i see so if you somebody came up to me when you're like, I'm going to pass on any amount of this. See, so if somebody came up to me and they're like, Tom, would you like to cash in all of the money that you have for some number of these vaccines? I'd be like, yeah, I'll fucking, absolutely. Let's fucking do it. Here's all the money that I can muster. I'll sell my car, whatever it is.

Let's get vaccines out there because 2,000 people a day are dying. If you have resources and you don't throw them at this problem, you're basically like, yeah, every, every day it's nine 11. And I'm just like, I don't know. I could get binoculars and look out for airplanes, but binoculars are kind of expensive. You know what I mean? What the fuck is wrong with you? And then, you know, just the, Trump has sort of taken a huge step back. I mean, we can argue that he hasn't been doing anything anyway.

You could argue that he hasn't been, and he has been fanning the flames of, and that's the thing too, just even Trump just saying out loud, well, it's not a big deal. Oh, it's a, you know, you know, you got to wear a mask, get to wear a big mask all the time. You got to wear a big mask. Well, what the fuck do you need the fucking vaccine for? Why are you touting this vaccine so much? If you don't think it's a big deal, you know, like it just, again, even him, even him, he's just a fucking, he's conflicted.

Well, and he was an anti-vaxxer for a long time too. Sure. And, and so now we're at this position where he's taken such a Well, and he was an anti-vaxxer for a long time too. Sure. And, and so now we're at this position where he's taken such a huge step back. He's mopey fucking, he's mopey fucking Melly walking around the White House.

I'm so sad because I watched and I don't want to lose. And so, so that's, that's what he's doing. And now he's not doing literally anything.

And, and this is not getting better day by day. There's no top-down leadership at all. And we're's not doing literally anything. And this is not getting better day by day. There's no top-down leadership at all. And we're just in this fucking sort of slow motion crash until January. And then nobody's going to want to listen to Biden because once Biden takes over, half the country hates his guts and thinks he stole the election. Biden takes over. Half the country hates his guts and thinks he stole the election.

So now they're not going to listen to him when he says, I'm calling for a mass mandate for 100 days to be a patriotic. It sounds great, but nobody's going to listen to that. No. Nobody's going to do that. No, because what Trump has primarily done with his remaining days since November 3rd is to poison the well. Everything that he's done, all of his focus,

all of his attention has been, and really dramatically so, has been on poisoning the well. So, and we watched, because he's a spite-filled motherfucker, we watched him out of spite dismantle the entire Obama administration, right? He hated Obama.

He made no bones about that. And, you know, he made it one of his goals to take all of Obama's achievements and try to destroy, dismantle, and roll them back. I don't think it mattered whether or not he agreed or disagreed, whether or not they were valuable to the economy or not valuable to the economy. The point was he can't stand the idea of somebody else winning. Somebody else gets, so the whole point of November 3rd to January 20th will really be to create a set of impossible conditions

so that Biden cannot succeed inside those conditions to create traps, to put administrative and procedural barriers in place. And he's working very, very hard on doing that. It has nothing to do with the good of the that. It has nothing to do with the good of the country. It has nothing to do with the good of the American people, the success of us as a nation, the generational future for our children. He doesn't have some competing worldview where he says, I'm doing this because I think it's better for the world. That's what we had

with all other presidents before, right? And we got to argue about, man, your worldview doesn't match my worldview. But at least even with assholes like W, you really thought that they had a view of the world and they were acting on the best intentions that were misguided and wrong, but they were acting on the best intentions to shore up a future they believed in. Trump is acting on himself and he's trying to hurt anybody that is his personal enemy. And he's willing to burn us all to the ground, man. All he is is a fucking fiddle manufacturer on the top of the fucking mountain. That's it.

I think that's a great way to look at it because it's 100% true. What he's been doing has been always for spite. Everything he does feels like it's a hundred percent for spite. It's never in our best interest. And I just can't get my head around how people see him as a guy who is for them. How do you look at him and say, that's my guy. He's doing, he's looking out for me when you could see every single thing that he's spending his time on is petty bullshit to try to either hurt somebody or take something away from someone else. No, look at, measure how he spends his time in a press conference. He spends all of his time in a press conference talking about himself and his own personal grievances. His last press conference was supposed to be on COVID-19.

He treated that shit like it was fucking Festivus' airing of grievances. Are you kidding me? Like, I thought it was going to be feats of strength after it was done. I thought he was going to fucking, Mike Pompeo was going to come out and they were going to wrestle about something. God, I would love to see anyone. How much would you pay? Real quick, see anyone. How much would you pay? Real quick, Cecil. How much would you actually pay to wrestle Trump?

I would give up my coronavirus line vaccine. I would give up my space in line for the vaccine to wrestle Trump. I'd sell both my cars tomorrow. I would, yeah. I would sell both of my cars tomorrow for the ability to just wrestle Trump. I'd figure out a I would sell both of my cars tomorrow for the ability to just wrestle

Trump. I'd figure out a way to remortgage my place and take out all the equity in my house, which isn't a lot, but hey, it is what it is. And I would figure out a way. I would, oh my God. And I wouldn't want to just wrestle him. I would want to MMA fight him in a cage. So he couldn't get away. That would be. He can't get away. He can't get away. But could you imagine putting him in like a fucking full Nelson

and just cranking him down on that guy? Make it so he can't breathe. And he's just, all he's doing is able to flap his arms a little, just a little to try to tap, but he can't tap anything. He can't tap the old letter. And then he starts counting with his feet. He's counting. Amazing.

You do that thing with like heavy people where you like, you squish them forward enough that their own fat presses into their lungs and they can't breathe. You know, they're just like, I would want to asphyxiate him with his own fucking belly fat. That's what I want to quickly feed him a fucking big bag. That's what I want to do.

God, I can't wait for him to go away forever. Me too. You know, I'm just so sad about how many people are still on his side. And this is not going to end. But the inauguration day is going to come and go because, you know, nobody, he keeps on going to these places and saying, Hey, electors, you shouldn't, you should pick new electors on in different States. And they're

all like, yeah, we're going to pass on that. We're not going to break democracy for you. But seriously, he's asking them to pick different electors. He's asking the governors to dismiss the electors and pick new electors. If that happens, man, this whole country's just going to light up like a fucking Roman candle. It's going to be ridiculous. You cannot... That literally is the breaking of our democracy.

That would be the collapse of democracy and we would just be counting the days until we become whatever is after this. But do not expect anybody to be paying any attention to any kind of COVID, anything coming forward. They're already not doing it for the governors, right? And that's why Trump, I think, never stepped in because he knew his base was full of a bunch of people who didn't want to do this. And if he would have stepped and if he would have stepped in he would he would

have lost really badly if he would have had some sort of mask mandate from on high oh absolutely girl one fucking cake bitch know what it is bitch that shit being like a fucking kid bitch make this shit live make this shit go viral bitch'm going to lose my voice if I go fucking to work, bitch. I got to work at 10 o'clock, bitch. Fucking get a paycheck, bitch. What does it mean to be from Florida? Florida. Straight drip.

So straight comes to the raw story. Bombshell report outs Florida Governor Ron DeSantis for lying to people about COVID-19. Ron DeSantis is the governor of Florida, and he has got to be probably, he probably wins the second fucking prize this year for the most egregious misinformation and disinformation from a public official, major public official about COVID. Since this thing began in Florida,

he has been standing in front of the cameras downplaying COVID, talking about how masks aren't necessary, mocking and belittling the idea of shutting states down, about enforcing social distancing practices. He stood in front of cameras even like right before Florida had its big giant wave, he stood in front of cameras mocking these other states that had locked their economies down, saying like, come to Florida. Like, we're not, you know, we've got this shit licked. It's not a big deal. You're all going to look fucking stupid. He even like leaned over to the reporters at one point and said, you better apologize to me because I said last week that this wasn't going to be a big deal. And a week later, it's not a big deal or something. And he called out the reporters on

the carpet at one point. So the report came out from the South Florida Sun Sentinel, which by the way, is very difficult to pronounce. It is. It is. The South Florida Sun Sentinel. Okay. It'd be a difficult thing to sell door to door, I imagine. Can you sell the South Florida sun Sentinel down by the seashore? I'm going to put it right next to my, next to my seashells by the seashore. So he was, um, as you might expect, he was suppressing bad news, spreading bad information and ignored facts about the Corona virus. And none of that should be surprising because really we had the same fucking information this motherfucker had, but he had more. So in the summertime, in April and May and June and July,

when this motherfucker was standing in front of the cameras like we were talking about downplaying the virus, even as people flocked to Florida, even as people packed the bars, packed the clubs, packed the fucking restaurants in Florida, he was doing packed the bars, packed the clubs, packed the fucking restaurants in Florida, he was doing that to keep his fucking economy afloat. That's it. He was just keeping that to keep the fucking cashflow going. And then very, very, very predictably, Florida was one of the bigger states for a major fucking epicenter outbreak of goddamn COVID and the

deaths that are associated with that. And even when that happened, he downplayed the fucking cases and the deaths. He's like, ah, it's just a blip. Yeah, it's just a blip. Keep coming here to spend some fucking money. Disney, motherfuckers. Disney. Well, and it's blood in the gears. And none of these people cared. They didn't care in Texas when they said, it's cool if grandpa dies. I don't give a shit. My fucking business is going under. Fuck grandpa.

I'll fucking kill him. I will sacrifice him right now if my business will stay. And they literally didn't care. And they did the same thing in Florida. The thing is, is that he, did you see that he, there was a data scientist down there

that got their home raided by the cops? Yeah, so this, a woman who, who insisted on publishing the real data out of Florida, they came in guns drawn and confiscated. This week, they confiscated all her shit, pointed guns at her fucking kids and her family and took her computers and shit. It's crazy.

It's unreal. I think the only thing that we can look forward to in the Biden, when Biden takes office is more truthful numbers coming out about COVID because there's so many different governors, Republican governors that were fucking, they were cooking the books. Yes, they are. Like there wasn't a big deal. And you could tell that was the truth because as soon as fucking Trump lost or it appeared that he lost, even before Biden even was declared, they started coming out with, oh, it's getting pretty bad. Oh, it's getting pretty bad.

You guys got to, we're going to have to do 30 days of masks. So we're going to have to shut down for a little while here and there. And you could just tell that they were fucking holding back some stats because they figured it would hurt. It wouldn't, it would hurt Trump

if they let them out. And how crazy is that, that you're willing to say, yeah, I'd like to be a leader of the people. And by leader of the people, what I really mean is in order to stay in charge, I'm willing to sacrifice the lives of the most vulnerable of my citizens. That is not leadership. How the fuck do we all care so much, or not even just not all of us, but how the fuck do so many people care about hurting one dude's feelings? How the fuck is that possible, man?

You know, if you said to me, if you don't quit your job, this man over here is going to die. You're going to die. This guy over here, he's going to fucking die. But you got to quit your job. And I need my job. This guy over here, he's going to fucking die. But you got to quit your job. And I need my job. My job pays for my life. You know, I need my fucking job. People, my whole family relies on me for this job. I would quit that job in a fucking second. That's not a

moral quandary at all. Be like, yeah, I'll fucking absolutely quit my job. Don't kill that guy. What I'm baffled by is the idea that people, it's just a job. Being a politician is just a job. It's all that it is. If you lose the election, if you're not a politician anymore tomorrow, you just go off and do a different thing with the rest of your time.

That's it. It's a fucking job. You're not, you don't get like fucking flying wings or you can't shoot fucking fireballs out of your hands. It's just a job. Who the fuck is like, yeah, I'd rather kill somebody than lose my job. It's a fucking job, asshole. But that's, that's where we're at.

We're at a place where we're looking at people and they're making decisions and they're like, yeah, I'd rather let people die than lose my job. Are you fucking high? It's a fucking job i don't know i i think what i do is i'd let them die and then i would start a foundation in their name just to remember i think that's probably what you need to do and yes i'm aware that jason is at risk for measles mumps hepatitis b diphtheria influenza meningitis pertussis polymethasus Rubella, tetanus, tuberculosis Yellow fever

Look, there are hundreds of diseases I can't protect my kid from all of them So why protect him from any of them? So this story comes from Newsweek California protester says she'd rather put a bullet in my head Than take the COVID vaccine Wait, who is she talking Is she saying her own head

or is she saying the person who's talking to her head? I think her own head. Okay. I think she's so afraid of the vaccine that she would rather die of something different than the vaccine. Got it. Okay.

I don't know what she thinks the vaccine would do to her. Don't take this vaccine. It'll kill you. Well, I better shoot myself in the head to avoid that. That would be terrible. The only saving grace, Cecil, is with these fucking people, if they shoot themselves in the head, they're not going to hit anything vital.

Tom, if you thought the fucking Herculean effort to get fucking a COVID vaccine in nine months, nine-ish months done, tested out there into the world, distributed to the first people this week before the end of the year, not just before the end of the year, couple of weeks before the end of the year, if you thought that Herculean effort was amazing,

you're in for a whole new treat about trying to convince probably 40% of our population to take it. Yeah. You know what my sincere wish is? And it won't come true. I know that it won't. But I wish that herd immunity did not protect the stupid. Because what's going to happen is at some point, people like this will, over time, enough people will get the vaccine. Because the vaccine is going to be required by your employer as a condition for work.

It's going to be required. Proof of a vaccine will probably be required in order for you to travel overseas. Enough places are going to put incentives in place, even if it's not mandatory from the top down. There will be enough incentives in place that people will take this vaccine. It'll take longer than it should. Everybody should just line up and line and everybody should just fucking take the vaccine. But that won't happen. But there will be enough

incentives in place, enough carrots rather than sticks in place to make a significant amount of the population go out and get this vaccine. And the unfortunate part, Cecil, is that people like this

who avoid the vaccine, they'll be the ones that are protected by those of us who are responsible. Yep. And I wish that wasn't the case i wish people like this would still get the fucking rona i really really do i wish people like

this would get the rona and they'd and i don't want them to die i want them to fucking have erectile dysfunction and i want them to have like the fucking sleepies all the time and the fucking irreparable brain fog and the fucking lose their sense of taste and smell. Taste. Yeah. We have a friend. You and I have a friend who's immunocompromised.

Yeah. And she's probably not going to be able to take this vaccine. Right. I don't know. I don't know either. I don't know if the vaccine

is going to work for her. I don't know if the vaccine is going to work, right? I don't know if you're going to be able to take the vaccine. But this asshole who's sitting on the fucking sidelines here who's on the street fucking sidelines here, who's on

the street, they're going to be breathing air and passing this around. And man, it's going to be hard to put enough incentives around. International travel isn't an incentive to how many people in this country. It doesn't matter to them. Now, I know some anti-vaxxers. I know anti-vaxxers. And I know that they traveled to a country overseas. And I know that even though they're anti-vaxxers, they really wanted to go

to this other country and they got vaccinated. Sure. Because they wanted to go do this thing. But I think that's not as common as people who never leave their house, you know, sit there drinking Miller Lite and complaining about everything and never do anything.

You're going to have to tie it to a stimulus or something like that in some way to make it so that they realize that it's something that they do. But then, you know, you look at all these other people who are now saying that it's the mark of the beast and this is the end times. And the vaccine is what God was telling us about. And the vaccine is the thing that you,

if you take the vaccine, then you're part of the beast side or whatever. I don't even know. And then the beast side, you go out there and you, you now you're, you can't go into the heaven because you've got the mark of the beast. And you go out there and you, uh, you, now you're, you can't go into heaven cause you've got the mark of the beast.

And that's how, and, and that's how you now can go into the grocery store because you're wearing your vaccine sticker or that's how you go back to work is you cause you, and that's how you're making your money. And that's how you can go to the movie theater. And that's, it's not transactional in the sense that it's the chip anymore. Now it's, it's going to be transactional because you got to prove you have the vaccine. And I'll be perfectly frank. Like if I was running a restaurant, I would seriously consider some way to make it so

that people could prove to me they had the fucking vaccine before they came in. Do you remember when the, I think it was this, I don't know if it was a swine flu or the avian flu, but there was a flu several years back, maybe 10 years ago or so. flu, but there was a flu several years back, maybe 10 years ago or so. And I remember being, it was a reasonably significant flu pandemic. And I remember waiting in a big, long line, big, long line to get that flu shot. And then when I got the flu shot, they gave me a card with my name on it and a bunch of identifying information that says that I had been vaccinated. I carried that card in my wallet. I had that in my car, in my wallet for several years, actually. I just always transferred it, never thought twice about it. I don't think that this is going to be

or that this should be terribly dissimilar. I think it's entirely reasonable for employers to say, yeah, cool. You don't want to return to work. You got to get this fucking vaccine. That's it. We do that with all kinds of, you have to get vaccinated for work in this country to go overseas and do certain things and be in certain areas. It has to happen. You have to do it. So if that, and that's okay. And then I don't, I have no issue with, with us getting those, giving those vaccines out. You know, the people in the UK, there was a daily today, a daily podcast today, where they're talking to some of these people and they're saying they're not going to get it, even in the UK.

Now, they didn't find a lot of them. A lot of the people that they played, at least on this daily podcast, were all, yeah, sure, I'll take it. Yeah, I'll take it. Yeah, I'll take it. Some people were a little leery because Boris Johnson is the one who's pushing it over there.

They don't like him, so they're a little leery. And I understand that. And I think I would be very leery if, if Trump was, if that it had come out before the, uh, the election and it felt like it was just thrown together. But you know, these are, these are, these, all these companies are getting it passed through all these different countries version of the FDA or whatever. So it's, they're all getting passed and you can see that they're all passing it. So it's not like you need to worry too much about it, but you know, I, I, there's people who are not going to take it and they're not going to take it in the UK and they're not going to take it in Canada. And I bet you more than anywhere else in

the, in the world, the United States is not going to take it. There's going to be a significant group of people that are not going to take it. And you're going to, there's going to be, you know, you think there was fights over masks, wait till vaccine comes around. It's just starting, man. I don't disagree with you. I think, I think that there are some common sense solutions that I, like I said, that I hope that we see. I think it would be great if insurance companies offered incentives against your premiums. So get a, get a, get a Rona vaccine and you get a hundred dollars off your, you know, $200 off your insurance premium.

You know, I think it should be something like, great. You want to join this gym. Everybody has to be, if enough places make it annoying, not to have it. Eventually you'll need it.

Right. You'll just get it. So if like, I can't go to the gym cause you got to have the fucking Rona vaccine. If it's just the gym, then it's not going to fly. But if it's like, man, I can save some money on my health insurance. And the only way for me to join this gym

is to have the Rona vaccine. Yeah, the only way to get on an airplane. The only way to get on an airplane, even for interstate travel, is with proof of a fucking Rona vaccine. I can't apply for a fucking passport without the Rona. There should be a lot of incentives, lots of disparate incentives,

like you're saying before, because you have to cover lots of different kinds of people who are going to be motivated by lots of different motivators. Different things. But we can do that. We can do that without making it mandatory. You can do it by putting a lot of incentives in place,

carrots instead of sticks, because people will respond to that differently. I am really worried we won't do any of that and we'll just offer it like, I don't know, here it is. But insurance companies have the biggest incentive because the dollars that they outlay if people get the fucking Rona are huge. Well, I mean, I have more confidence now that maybe there might be some sort of plan to do that than I would if Trump was still the president. Yeah, true. You know?

True, yeah. Oh my God, let's take a picture. Let's take a picture right now. Oh my God, here we go. Oh my God, I'm making a face. One big nose, delete it. Delete it. What am I doing?

I'm looking at the mouse. I'm looking at a orca whale. Delete it. Delete it. So this story is from the BBC News. COVID, how a picture of my foot became anti-vaccine propaganda. That picture is not safe for life. It is a rough, rough picture.

It's not safe for life. Yeah, it's not safe for life. This reminded me, incidentally, do you remember many years ago from our first podcast? I was thinking about this. There was these things, back when we did our very first podcast, Everyone's a Critic, and we would talk about skeptical issues in addition to reviewing movies and doing a very bad job of both of them. Never doing anything good. There were these things that were being sold, these detox foot patches. And they were all over TV at the time.

I don't know what the fuck it was, but you supposedly put on these fucking detox foot patches. And then you wait an hour or whatever it was. And then you take off these foot patches and you look at them and they looked a fucking horror. Oh, yeah. They turned like black and green and like all kinds of fucking funky and supposedly that was all the schmutz and toxins and fucking pulling out of your body bad vibrations or whatever because it comes out of your feet for some reason all the rest of your body's fine ruda giuliani leaks it out of everywhere but the rest of us it only comes out of your feet yeah

so i bought a whole shit ton of these things just out of curiosity. I just bought like three or four packages of these things. And I was just like, I'm going to slap these fucking pigs all over my whole body. So I put them on my feet. I put them on my nipples. I put them on my back, on my arms, everywhere. And what it is, is they're incredibly uncomfortable and they don't breathe at all. So whatever you put them on sweats.

And then they just, I put some in the sink and poured water on them and they all look exactly the same. They turn black. They all turn black. They all turn black. And I saw this and I actually thought of that same thing because what it is, is using something that has nothing to fucking do with the problem and recaptioning a photo. That's really all this is, is taking a photo of something bad and then putting a caption on it and being like, yeah, you can caption fucking anything.

Well, you know, she was part of the Pfizer trial, right? So she gets the thing, and they did say one of the side effects was medicine ejection through the skin or something like did say one of the side effects was medicine ejection through the skin or something like that was one of the side effects. And it happened coincidentally. She got these really gnarly blisters on the back of her feet

at a time when she was in the trial. And so she gets this thing put up, a GoFundMe gets put up, not by her, by somebody else. They take pictures of her and then they talk about her being in the COVID trial. And I think in some ways to sort of drum up a little more money

and the person was a little savvy thinking there's going to be people out there that want to give money based on this to try to boost the signal and she got a lot give money based on this to try to you know boost the signal and she got a lot of money based on it and then they the they went through and they looked and they saw that she was one of the salt water people she was placebo she got the placebo they went through and looked and found she was placebo and then and then afterwards she's like oh I, I didn't realize how bad this was going to be. And now she's,

now she's doing a mea culpa, which is essentially, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to do this, but you know, the damage is done. This picture's out there. And you know, I, I receive, I receive, I can't tell you how many different, different times a week I'll get private messages. I'll get emails. People will send me stuff and it will, it will be fake. I'll see it on our Facebook, on our private Facebook page. People will post stuff and it's completely fake and they think it's real. And then all it takes is 10 seconds of Googling

to find out it's fake, but they didn't bother to do that extra step and nobody else will either. And this is a group of people that should be skeptical, right? This is a group of people, our audience, who should be skeptical. They get fooled because they want to believe it. So what do you think is going to happen outside in the world?

The retraction never gets as much press as the actual story. No, and the thing is that people are going to continue. Part of the problem, too, is that news now doesn't exist in a way that is responsible. News is now a never-ending cycle. So what I mean by that is it's not just, you turn on the TV or you get a newspaper, it's dated Tuesday. On Tuesday, you read it.

And then on Wednesday, you throw that newspaper in the garbage. And then you have to remember it or recall it or retell the story. Everything stays now in perpetuity. So this story, even though you debunk it on Wednesday, if somebody repeats it on Thursday, you got to debunk the fucking thing on Friday.

It's a never ending cycle. You can't possibly keep up with this shit. And you can take something that happened, like, hey, I was in the vaccine trial and then this happened to my foot. Those things are true. That's true. She was in the vaccine trial. Then this thing happened to my foot. Those things are true. That's true. She was in the vaccine trial. Then this thing happened to her foot. That sounds causal. And if you're not a

critical thinker, if you don't say like, oh man, did this happen to your foot because of the vaccine? Did you actually get the vaccine or did you get the fucking placebo? Was there another cause? Like maybe according to this article, you had fucking shitty shoes that you were walking around in in the cold taking a walk. Like, are there other things that could cause nasty sores on your fucking biscuits?

There's, we are not good at that kind of thing because we're a headline driven, social media driven society. Sure. And that's how we get our information. It's soundbites. It's less than a soundbite.

It's phrase bites. It's these tiny clips of four and five and six words. And then we're off left to reinvent the entire rest of the fucking story. And to your point before, man, this kind of nonsense is going to be shared by people uncritically with good intentions to try to keep other people safe. And it's going to cause people not to get the fucking vaccine

because they're going to be like, man, I don't want my biscuits to rot or whatever happened. Yeah. And I think that a lot of that is good intentions. Yeah. It's just dumb fucking people. It's just dumb fucking people. Happy holidays, everyone. We know you're excited to get all wrapped up and jingle these bells. Matter of fact, slow it down. Ooh, got some sexy new ad copy for you from Adam and Eve. What better way to celebrate the holidays than putting Adam and Eve back into Christmas Eve? I assume that means they want us to keep the holiday sexy and original

by using some classic sexy lines from, that's right, the Bible. A reading from Thong of Thongs. Hey, girl, your breasts are like two fawns, twins of a gazelle, which is hot because, oh dear. Another reading, your stature is like that of the palm, and your breasts are like clusters of fruit, meaning they come in a bunch of between 5 to 15 nuts per tree. Yeah, here's another one. Hey, boy.

My lover is to me a sachet of myrrh resting between my breasts. Is that like teabagging? I don't know what that... But here's another one. Hey girl, I am a wall and my breasts are like towers. Thus I have become in your eyes like one bringing contentment. Wow. Hot. Maybe there's one that's not boob related. Oh, blow on my garden that its fragrance may spread abroad. Let my lover come into his garden and taste its choice fruits. That's hot. We all know what garden means, right?

It's like the butthole or something. I got a better one. Hey, beloved, put your hand by the hole of my door and my bowels will move for you. Definitely butthole. A classic recommendation coming in from Ezekiel. Talk dirty to your lover. Wow, whose members were like those of donkeys? Ooh, and who's gonna issue like it was that of horses? Oh, I'm longing for the lewdness of my youth when the Egyptians handled my bosom and pressed my breasts. Dang, Ezekiel.

Better call him Freakiel. See what I'm putting down? Um, oh shit. Cut the bells. I read the ad copy wrong. Cut the bells. I read the ad copy wrong. What better way to celebrate the holidays than putting a little Adam and Eve back into your Christmas Eve

by going to adamandeve.com and using code GLORY for 50% off almost any one item and free shipping delivered so discreetly to your door. If you're thinking about getting your stocking stuff this holiday season, make sure to go to adamandeve.com. Tell them Zeke the Freak sent you. But use code GLORY at checkout. Nailed it. Fuck his haters, because they ain't us.

They hate us because we ain't us? What the fuck does an anus have to do with this? They hate us because they ain't us. That's not what it is. Yes, it is. No, it's not. They hate us because we is us, and what we is doing is fucking terrible. They fucking hate us because they ain't us.

Stop saying that. They hate us because they ain't us. They don't hate us because they ain't us. They hate us because they ain't us. They don't hate us because they ain't us. I'm used to it. They fucking hate us because they hate us. Stop saying that. They hate us because they hate us. They don't hate us because they hate us. They hate us because they hate us. They don't hate us because they hate us. I'm used to it. They hate us because they hate us. Stop it.

Stop it. Don't say it again. I love this story so much. This story is also from Newsweek. Roger Stone says North Korean boats delivered ballots through Main Harbor. What now? As Trump boosts fraud claims.

First of all, why the fuck would you go from North Korea to Maine? That's a weird direction. Did they just go right through the earth? Did they do one of those straight through?

Sir, we could go to the West Coast. No! Go around. Fuck you. That's so much harder. Sir, fuck you! Did they do one of those straight through? Like, sir, we could go to the West Coast. No. Go around. Fuck you. That's so much harder, sir. Fuck you. We've got ballots. Deliver them to Maine.

Maine doesn't even make sense as a place. Fucking deliver them to Maine. Fuck you. I'm sorry. It's not a battleground, sir. Just what did I say? I will shoot you with an aircraft gun. Who's in charge? Look, it's either me or my sister.

I'm in a coma. I'm not sure who's in charge, actually. What? So here's what Stone said. I just learned of absolute incontrovertible evidence of North Korean boats delivering ballots through a harbor in Maine, the state of Maine. Then he says, and I love this because a moment ago he said, I have absolute incontrovertible evidence.

Then the next sentence is, if this checks out, well, everything that's absolute and incontrovertible would fucking check out. That's what absolutely- Yeah, necessarily. Yeah, that's how it works. Can I just say too, this is also falling back to what we said earlier with the you know uh the cognitive dissonance that keeps happening you know we're at simultaneously at our uh on our best uh communication level ever with north korea

because trump is such a genius and simultaneously they're trying to ruin our elections, to thwart our elections. Thank you. On the same fucking, in the same set, aren't you the same guys that pump fucking Trump's balls all the time that he's doing such a great job by talking to these dictators and yet they're still trying to thwart us? But don't worry, Trump knows the guy and they have a beautiful relationship.

Don't you want, Cecil and they have a beautiful relationship don't you want cecil just as a matter of course if your enemy if you're fucking if you're fucking arch nemesis in the world cecil was like yeah you know who should be in charge yeah that guy wouldn't you be like well that's the guy i don't want to be in charge yeah why because my enemy wants him to be in charge sure my enemy doesn't have my best interest at heart. That's why they are, wait for it, the fucking enemy. If they, what the fuck? When North Korea and Russia are working to get Trump elected, shouldn't that give everybody

pause? Like, wow, our enemies want that guy in charge. That must make us weaker than them or they wouldn't want that. That's how enemies work. What the fuck? What world? You have to live in a world if you're Roger Stone

where simultaneously you have to say our enemies want this guy to be in charge. Don't you think that's a problem? What? I fucking hate Roger Stone stone so much i just want him to go away too eventually he was supposed to go away but he got part i know i know um with his fucking weird nixon tattoo oh god weird you're weird man you fucking batman is a fucking comic book dude you can't be a fucking comic book villain in real life.

Mr. Glass is an M. Night Shyamalan thing. Seriously. Weirdo. You're weird. 100% looks like the penguin. It does. He looks like the penguin. He dresses like the penguin.

He wears a top hat and tails. Same thing. It is the penguin. Fucking weirdo. Same thing. It is the penguin. Fucking weirdo. You married the most, most, most, most, most genius man in the whole world,

Kanye West. I miss you all. Don't forget to say your prayers. So this story comes from comicbook.com. Netflix's Tiger King star, Joe Exotic, reaches out to Kim Kardashian for help getting a pardon from Donald Trump. That is a sentence I read out loud. Think about that for a second.

That is a sentence. Here, I'm going to add a little color to it, Cecil. I'm going to reread it, and I'm going to add a little color to it. You ready? Okay, go ahead. I'm ready. Staying true. Staying true.

Netflix's Tiger King star, Joe Exotic, reaches out to Kim Kardashian, wife of birthday party presidential candidate rapper Kanye West, for help getting a departed from Donald Trump. Still a true thing that I said. Nothing I just said is not straight 2020 facts, motherfucker. 2020 has been hell, but this entire headline is 2020 is a board it's it's what's in the tube when you suck 2020's essence out of 2020 that's what's in the tube yeah yeah i i'm you read this and you don't even you don't even know where to begin on the idea that we have anything left to be farcical about.

Do you think Trump will give him one? A pardon? Yeah. You know, the world is fucking weird enough, Cecil, that I kind of do. I kind of, I'm not even kidding. I kind of think he's just going to randomly pardon weirdos. I really, really do. Famous weirdos, though. Yeah, right. Not randos. Not just some, he's not just going to randomly pardon weirdos. I really, really do. Famous weirdos, though. Famous, not randos, not just, he's not just going to, he's not just going to

spin a dial of all the people that are in like a fucking, like a grand prize game or a price is right type dial. It's not going to be like having the card in your spokes when you're a kid it's not gonna be like that but he is he is going to look at all the famous people that he can get that will then be his because you know look at blago yeah yeah you know you're right that was weird that was just a weird random goyavich fuck blagojevich in the ass anyway. But then as soon as it happened, look at what he did. He went out and he had a $700,000 steak dinner or whatever for Trump. He held a fucking rally for him because Trump knew that he could then motivate people and say,

look at this Democrat that's now on on my side. Cause he knows how, you know, he knows who I am. Same thing happened. There's another guy who got the, on the stage too. He wasn't a, a, a, someone who he pardoned, but he had a Democrat on stage who happened to be an ex Democrat or whatever from, uh, from, I think it was Alabama or something like that. That was on stage during his crazy convention this year. We had those people who were pointing guns at people to give them the keynote or whatever. The wackaloons.

And that woman who was like, the best is yet to come. Like all those fucking wackaloons. Screaming into an empty fucking conference room. All those terrifying people. Yeah, but he basically had a, he loves to do that. And so this is a perfect opportunity for him to signal boost how great he is. So I kind of do think he will. I think he might actually pardon him. I kind of do too. Joe Exotic has become kind of a

trash hero, like an American trash hero. And so why not pardon him? If you're Trump, why not? The rest of us, the people who don't think it's appropriate are going to be like, man, fucking what? Of all the weird shit that happened this year,

I'm not going to fucking get my fucking panties in a wad over Joe Exotic going free. I think it's wrong, but of all the things to worry about, there's no harm in it. There's only upside because he's become this kind of weird, cult celebrity trash hero.

Yeah, he's like a weird folk hero. And it's because the way they filmed that Netflix special made him look like someone who's always been kicked around, always downtrodden. But when you watch the actual footage and you see what kind of an asshole that guy is. Thank you. You know, but they did a good job of trying to make him look like the underdog.

Right. And he was always getting dogpiled on by these other people. But then you think, yeah, well, all those people are scummy too. But he is also scummy. It doesn't stop him from being a scumbag. It's just, yeah, maybe, maybe sometimes scumbags have people plotting against them. That may happen, but it doesn't make them less of scumbags because they have enemies. It doesn't even make any sense, but they did a really good job of making it. And because your brain has to, we're trained. And these documentaries are really good about this.

There's so many documentaries out there that set you up to make you feel a certain way. And you've got to pay attention to the source material if you're going to search for it to really pay attention to make sure you're not being played because documentaries can really sway you in that way. And then you also enter it with there's, you know, we watch everything.

There's a good and a bad. And yeah, sure. We watch some things that have some moral gray area, but a lot of stuff we watch, there's a good and a bad guy. And, you know, you're watching a documentary. It's the same format now. Is there a good or a bad guy? Yeah. Well, now we've got to place people in those positions yeah they're definitely they're trying to tell a story and they're creating a protagonist and you know generating an arc and all that kind of stuff and they they did a fine job of that i i do think that joe exotic a part of me thinks that cecil not because of any reasons but just because 2020 is so weird just so weird, that maybe appealing for some reason to Kim Kardashian,

whose husband gave her, by the way, a fake, what was it, a hologram of her dead father talking about how great her husband was. Jesus Christ. Like, there's nothing weirder than all of these things. There's just nothing more surreal. So I think it's going to happen. Here's how I hope the announcement goes though. Kim Kardashian announces it on Instagram twerking. If that happens, then I think 2020 at that point has just laid its chips on the table and it's all in. do you 2020 is all what do you think the next big

social media um so obviously trump trump used twitter as his means of communicating very very important policy and and hiring decisions to the american people in the middle of the night randomly with no notice of the people he was hiring. That's not weird. That's not weird. Yeah. So that was, that was Trump's, um, random social media bullhorn of choice. What do you think it'll be next? Do you think it'll be Tik TOK? It'd be like eight second dance videos of everything that we're going to do. Biden has to come out and say all policy in eight seconds. He's got to do like policy less more than eight seconds. Like looping fucking videos of it too.

Sorry, your policy's over. It's way too long. Way too long. You have to cut it down. To be honest, I actually would prefer if we legislated through TikTok. Then you couldn't put

all the pork shit in there. Then you couldn't tie stimulus to businesses getting, you know, trickle down stimulus to us or whatever the fuck they did last time when they said, don't worry, you know, trickle-down stimulus to us or whatever the fuck they did last time when they said, don't worry, you guys will get it eventually.

Whatever they did. When all the lobbyists get their money, then whatever's left over goes to the people that live here. Yeah. Trickle-down stimulus. That's how it works. Fuck us.

Trickle-down has been working so long. Let me tell you, my mascara's trickling down. That's what's been happening. Fucking someone's got to get me a fucking tissue. It's so small. That's one of the surprising things about it.

Can I touch it? It's so light. Of course it is, Jen. The internet doesn't weigh anything. No, of course it doesn't. So, here we go, buddy. This is from The Verge.

This is so amazing. People are putting their router. Okay, I'll try. Hold on. People are putting their routers in jail to protect themselves from harmless Wi-Fi. Do not pass go. Do not collect internet signal. This is spectacular.

So there are people who are preying on the fucking bizarro world fears that people have of Wi-Fi. And they're saying, oh, well, what you got to do then is you got to put your router in a Faraday cage. What a Faraday cage is, is essentially like a metal box, like a mesh metal box that does not allow electrical signals to pass through it. Which means that your Wi-Fi doesn't work from your router, stupid. It's basically saying, I'm afraid of my Wi-Fi. Do you have a hammer I can use to smash my fucking router? What I love is the reviews and how people are so indignant that it's not actually, that it's actually working, right? They're indignant.

They're upset. They wanted all the signal. They want all the signal, but they just don't want the signal. They don't know how to separate those two things. They're just stuck in this. I think it's so beautiful to watch people. Because look, they genuinely want Wi-Fi. They don't want to give up Wi-Fi.

That's why they're buying this fucking weird box to stick their fucking router in. Because they want the actual product. They just are fucking weirded out because they think the waves are going through your body. Newsflash for you folks. There's all kinds of fucking waves going through your body every moment of the day. I love that they want their Wi-Fi to work at the same time that they don't want their Wi-Fi to work.

But they want it. Yeah, the complaint is I put this cage. But they don't want their Wi-Fi to work. But they want it. They want, yeah, the complaint is, I put this cage. But they don't. I don't want Wi-Fi. I don't want this fucking, you know, radiation. Well, that's what Wi-Fi is. Well, I don't know that. And I'm afraid.

So what I want is a cage around my wife. So the thing you could sell these people, though, is you could sell them a cage that is an incomplete Faraday cage. You could sell them a box they put around their Wi-Fi, and as long as their router still works okay, they would have no way to know. It's like they're walking around with any other way to test the radiation. The test is, do you have Wi-Fi? Here's the thing, Tom. I think this is,

here's what you got to do. So what you need to do is you need to create, and they might even have them, something that fits on the end of a Ethernet that's small and does short-range Wi-Fi, right? So a tiny little thing that sits on the end of an Ethernet. And then out of the main router comes these cords. And then you just put

a little tiny Wi-Fi next to your thing. Or you just plug the cord in. You just put ports so that they could get the cords out. Oh, I love it. And you could Ethernet plug in. So you make them go back in time to when we had to plug things in. You just put ports so that they could get the cords out and you could Ethernet plug in. So you make them go back in time to when we had to plug things in.

Oh! Do you remember how much of a headache it used to be just to plug shit in? All the time! You're literally taking away all of the convenience of Wi-Fi so you could have a no-fi. I gotta admit it, I have to stand here like a fucking old person in the nineties connected to

the, what are you? I love to go online. My favorite thing is they go online to publish reviews. How are you online? My guess is you're on your phone or otherwise on wifi. There's a, there's a character in Better Call Saul that thinks he's susceptible to electromagnetic waves and can't be around lights. And he has to wear

this, this solar suit all the time, wherever he goes, because he's super phobic. All the electricity in his house is, is off and all that stuff. And I just keep thinking, this is this guy. This guy, he's got to walk around. When he walks around outside, he's looking at the streetlights and he's cringing from the streetlights and he's cringing when somebody turns a fluorescent bulb on and you've got to, you can't have any phones that work.

And, you know, these people just feel so fucking exhausting, you know, because there's no proof whatsoever that this does anything to you, you know, that, but, and, and let me tell you, there's a great fucking swath of humanity that right now has a fucking wifi router in their house. And there's nothing that's coming out and saying you're getting sick from this, right? There's no giant, you know, we, we figured out asbestos was making people sick. You know, like you would be able to figure this out pretty quickly. You know, if suddenly your feet had giant blisters on it, cause you had a fucking wifi route.

Also like everywhere that you go has wife everywhere, right? Everywhere. Put your phone on scan for wifi and drive. You are inundated all of the time. You go to the grocery store. They have Wi-Fi at the grocery store. Every restaurant, every coffee shop, every office building, most of the time you're not at home unless there's a pandemic. So outside of 2020, notwithstanding, most of the time, most people aren't spending the bulk of their day at home anyway. It's like shielding yourself from something that happens like 7% of the time, most people aren't spending the bulk of their day at home anyway. It's like shielding yourself from something that happens like 7% of the time. It's so weird.

So we want to thank our patrons. Of course, we want to thank all our patrons, but we will thank them next week because we recorded early this week and Ian did not put the names in, so we will thank you next week. But this is a perfect opportunity, folks, to get your name in there so we can read it next week. This is a great opportunity for you

to become a patron, become someone who we mention on the show, and it would help us out immensely too. It's the spirit of giving. It's the season of giving, folks. It is. So give some money of giving. It's the season of giving, folks. It is. So give some money to us. We give a lot of money to Ian.

And so we need you to replenish that money and give it to us on occasion too. So you can become a patron at dissonancepod.com or you can go to patreon.com slash dissonancepod and become a patron on a per episode basis. And you get tons of free audio every week, extra audio that we do live streams and all that live stream audio goes directly to your podcast player. And Ian puts out his commercials. You don't have to listen to him

in the show if you don't want to, but you can go afterwards and listen to him. He posts all of them. Tom posts readings from his blog. So we've got all these extra stuff that we give you every month. So if you become a patron, it's not just being nice. You're actually getting something out of the deal. So we'd love to have you. Got a message from Modest Needs

that we want to tell people about. It looks like between, so beginning January 1st, 2021, there's going to be a lot of people who are on the verge of homelessness. They have all matched gifts right now up to $150,000. It's a nationwide goal.

Everything is matched. That's amazing. It's all matched. So your dollars are worth double right now at Modest Needs. We know we just did a little fundraiser for the Senate and you can still donate to that. But if you want to donate to somebody this holiday season and hopefully help somebody from falling into poverty,

you can go to modestneeds.org and you can donate and all your money's doubled. And really, there is no organization, there's no charity I think that we like working with more than Not Modest Needs. It's a beautiful organization. It really is. And the guy that runs it, Keith,

is a tremendous human being. You can trust that your money goes directly to helping people. It's one of those things that you get to, when you donate to like, when you donate to Modest Needs, you feel really immediately gratified because you know you're helping somebody at a very ground level kind of a thing. It's a wonderful organization if you're looking for a place to give this year. And you get a chance to sort of interact and be sort of introduced to that

person because you can go on their website and look and find someone whose story touches you. We got an image. This was sent to us from Neve. I would normally pronounce that Ne-Maya, but it's Neve, evidently. I think that's what it was the last time they said. This is actually the secret of Neve. Yes.

That's it. But they sent an image of obama at the tiny desk god he doesn't look like a douchebag at all it's amazing doesn't look like a douchebag at all gosh it just you know you just some people just no matter what whether the desk is tiny or big doesn't matter what kind of desk you have around you you're still achebag. Look at him sitting at that desk with his normal-sized hands. Normal size. Normal size. I mean, his hands are sizable

in comparison to the rest of his body. We got a message from Angela, and Angela says that the thing that always fascinates them about people who scream about voter fraud is that they always claim things are happening that could not possibly happen, which means they don't know how voting works, which means they don't fucking vote.

And I will tell you every time I hear these people say, well, it's just how you, I think to myself, have you ever fucking voted before? Do you know what goes into it? When they're like, well, when they're checking your ID, go away. Yeah. You don't, you've not done this. You don't get to play here. Yep. No. When I went to, when I go in every time, I specifically don't show them my ID.

And I've been asked for it. Do they ask? I've been asked for it once. Somebody said, do you have ID? And I said, I don't need to show you my ID. And they said, oh, no, no. I just thought it'd be quicker. And I said, I'll spell my name for you.

Don't worry. I know, I know how to spell my name. I'll spell it'd be quicker. And I said, I'll spell my name for you. Don't worry. I know, I know how to spell my name. I'll spell it for you. You know, but, but the, they, I have been asked one time

and I refused. I specifically, I did. I did the time. I totally did. I'm not being, I can spell my name. I can spell my fucking name.

A hundred percent did. I'm not being detained to them. It was awesome. It was my only sovereign citizen moment of my life. And I was very proud of it. I just love it. Like I can spell my fucking name. Yeah, no, I got it. It was awesome. It was my only sovereign citizen moment of my life. And I was very proud of it. I just love it. Like I can spell my fucking name. Yeah, no, I got it. I got it. I've been spelling it my whole life. I'm good. I know what birthday I was born on. I'm good. Yeah. But it's funny. Cause you think, you know, I have to come in with, with information about

myself. I can't just walk in and not know that stuff. And do people vote onesie twosie voter fraud? Yeah, it happens on occasion. Sure. There's onesie twosie voter fraud, but the amount of voter fraud, what I don't get and what I still can't figure out with this voter fraud thing is do they think that, that Biden didn't win the popular vote too? Is that what they think? Do they think there's just like, there's been massive voter fraud everywhere, all across every state, but they're only paying attention in the places where it actually mattered? That's a good question. I don't know what

they think. Yeah, that's a good question. I wonder about that. I'm curious because if they didn't have that, because if it only mattered in those states, then that's such a weird coordinated effort to get 5 million people.

I mean, shit, you could just, we talked about it before, George Soros could just set people up six months in advance ahead of the fucking election. He could set up

30, 40,000 people in a fucking giant commune somewhere where they could just fucking wait, wait it out and get monthly checks until they go to vote.

It doesn't. And that would, would that even be illegal? Six months in advance? If they were getting paid by George Soros to live there? If they were employees of his, I don't think so. Yeah. I don't know how illegal that would be. I don't think so. I genuinely don't. I don't know. Because, because

you know, you can, I even think too that you can reward someone. I thought I read this week, and again, I don't know if this is true because I'm not a fucking law talking guy and I also don't know if this is a true thing. But I remember somebody saying or reading somewhere that you can pay someone or reward someone for voting,

but you can't pay or reward them for voting a certain way. So if somebody comes out of a polling place, there can be incentive for them to go, but there's, you can't sort of decide who they vote for. Do you know what I mean? Right. Yeah. Yeah. That's interesting.

So yeah, as long as you, yeah, as long as you say like look you can vote for who you want to vote for yeah but just letting you know that I've been paying your salary for six months right and I bought you

all those brand now my name's George Soros and I bought you all those brand new protest signs for Antifa so you you know one hand washes the other

you rub my back I'll rub yours so you can vote whoever you want to vote for when you leave the Biden compound you can vote for whoever you want to vote for. When you leave the Biden compound, you can vote for whoever you want to vote for

when you get on the Harris bus. I'm not telling you who to vote for. It's fine. I'm just saying, look into my eyes, Dominion. Dominion. So also we wanted to let people know we still have our ActBlue page up. So you can still go to dissonancepod.com

slash save the Senate. And it goes to ActBlue and you can still donate to either one of those runoff candidates. I'm just going to leave that up until I'm going to close it down. I think the day before the election or maybe a week or so before the election,

I'll close it down. But yeah, you can still go there and vote. And people have been, there's been a trickle, a slow trickle every day. People have been voting little bits here and there. So if you wanted to donate some money there, there's a, that's a great place to donate some money. Did you watch either of those fucking debates that they had?

One of them wasn't even a debate. I did not, no, I read about them. One of them wasn't even a debate. The guy didn't even show up. He just, the opponent didn't even show up. The guy just stood there and answered questions. The, the person who's actually running Ossoff showed up,

but Purdue never showed up. And so they just asked Ossoff questions for a full hour. Thanks for the free press conference. Oh my God. The other one, that fucking, that fem bot, loaf or whatever.

Unreal. She just, every time she spoke, she would say, she would say she would say uh radical liberal rafael warnock wants to take away your children latter radical liberal rafael warnock she said she she never referred to him any other way than radical liberal rafael warnock that's what she said every single time it's smart for her it felt like point, it felt like it was just weird, like one of those weird movies by that guy who makes movies that make no sense.

You know who I'm talking about. Oh, Lars von Trier? No, the other guy. The guy who did Twin Peaks, whatever that guy's name is. Oh, David Fincher, right? David Fincher. It's like a Fincher movie.

That was actually David Lynch, co-creator of Twin Peaks. At a certain point you're watching and you're just thinking, this is fake. Is she a real person? Is it just a really well done articulated puppet? It is crazy. It is insane. You can

watch a super cut of her just saying radical liberal Raphael Warnock. She says it 25 times in a row because they super cut it her just saying raf uh radical liberal rafael warnock she says it 25 times in a row because they super cut it together it's insane it's you know what it's it's it's not probably a bad strategy though yeah you know given what we know about about repetition and its ability to influence people's attitudes i guess that's true got a message from uh tankard and he said what's the Patreon goal for Ian and Gary to have their own spinoff miniseries?

We already have that set up. That's $5,000 an episode. You're already a patron, Tankard, so all you have to do is just up your patronage by a couple thousand dollars an episode, and we'll be there. And that's it. And then that's it.

Spinoff series is set, so don't worry. We funded that thing. It's all it takes. Yeah, so. It's like privately funding an entire Indiegogo campaign just yourself. Come on, it's nothing, guys. It's it. Spinoff series is set. So don't worry. It's all it takes. Yeah. So it's like privately funding an entire Indiegogo campaign. Really? Come on. It's nothing, guys. It's nothing.

Okay. How about this? How about this? Guys on Patreon, just post and say, hey, let's all just do this together. And then you guys can all just bring it up together. You know, many hands make light work. That's what they say. And nobody's going to make, nobody's going to make Ian work like the patrons. That's all they say. And nobody's going to make

Ian work like the patrons. That's all I'm saying. Nobody. You get the whip. It's good stuff. Run him through his fucking paces, guys. Got a message from Dan and he's in the UK and he sent us a place that's called Glory Hole Antiques in... Is it

Leicester? Leicester? Leicester? I don't know. I think it's pronounced Leicester for no reason. Whatever. It's in England, so nobody's going to go there anyway. Leicestershire sauce. Sarah had sent in an article, and I'm just going to read the

headline because it's the greatest headline ever. Six home recipes for holiday eggnog that are just as disgusting as the store. I think it's a fake paper. It's hilarious. It's super funny. So funny. The first one is mayonnaise and a candle. Literally amazing. It's so good. So good. We got a message. This is from Frank and Frank took a picture, I guess, his top podcast. Spotify told him what his top podcast was. We were his top podcast and he listened

to 44 episodes, which is not every episode this year. Frank, we just want to let you know that you missed some episodes and you should go back and send us a new image. That's all I'm saying. That's what he listened to in one month. Oh my God.

We got a message from Efefolakfolakfolakfol. I can't do it. I can't do it, but Noah can do it. Noah's good at it. The Icelandic volcano sent a message and he said, do you not all add water to

Campbell's? They're concentrated, so you have to add another liquid. Yeah, even with that other liquid, one serving of that is 21% of your daily sodium intake. And that's only one serving. And there's two and a half servings a can. So it's 50%. If you eat one can of Campbell's, it's 50% of your daily sodium intake.

That is one can of soup. Yeah, I looked this up the other day. It's like some of those cans are 800 milligrams of sodium in a can. Yeah, 800 milligrams. That's just a block of salt. That's all it is. It's a block of salt

that somebody fucking wrote chicken on the outside. It's like reaching into a container and instead of it being skull, just being a bullion cubes and putting one between your lip and gum. That's what It's like reaching into a container and instead of it being skull, just being bullion cubes and putting one between your lip and gum. That's what it's like. Wait, you don't do that?

All right. So that is going to wrap it up for this week. We want to let everybody know that we did our stream early this week. So we apologize. We said we were on Thursday

last week, but we had to move it this week. So it's actually Wednesday and it's going to be Wednesday for the rest of the year until the new year. It's going to be Wednesday for the rest of the year. Until the new year, it's going to be Wednesday. Because of the weird way that the two holidays, it's not weird because it happens every year

that they're on the same day because they're seven days apart. New Year's Eve and Christmas Eve are both on Thursdays this year. And so instead of interrupting your family time with people, we are instead moving our live streams to Wednesday night for the rest of the year. So come join us Wednesday night. Maybe some people who have never joined us because they had to work like on Thursday or something

might want to come join us and hang out. So Wednesday night for the rest of the year. At the beginning of next year, of course, they will be going back to Thursday. And you can always catch our live streams after the fact on Facebook and YouTube. They live there in perpetuity, so you can go check them out. But that is going to wrap it up for this week. We are going to leave you, like we always do,

with the Skeptic's Creed. Credulity is not a virtue. It's fortune cookie cutter, mommy issue, hypno-Babylon bullshit Couched in scientician, double bubble, toil and trouble Pseudo-quasi-alternative, acupunctuating, pressurized Stereogram, pyramidal, free energy, healing Water downward spiral, brain deadpan

Sales pitch, late night info-docutainment Leo Pisces, cancer cures, detoxures detox reflex foot massage death and towers tarot cars psychic healing crystal balls bigfoot yeti aliens churches mosques and synagogues temples dragons giant worms atlantis dolphins truthers birthers witches wizards vaccine vaccine nuts, shaman healers, evangelists, conspiracy, double-speak stigmata, nonsense. Expose your sides. Thrust your hands. Bloody, evidential, conclusive. Doubt even this. the opinions and information provided on this podcast are intended for entertainment purposes

only all opinions are solely that of glory hole studios llc cognitive dissonance makes no representations as to accuracy completeness current, currentness, suitability, or validity of any information and will not be liable for any errors, damages, or butthurt arising from consumption. All information is provided on an as-is basis. No refunds. Produced in association with the local dairy council and viewers like you.