Cognitive Dissonance - Episode 76: Irreligiosophy

Episode Date: December 2, 2012

Special thanks to Chuck from for being our guest. Visit our Website at for more info.

Want to stream Cognitive Dissonance to your Android or iPhone? Buy the app. Go to DissonancePod.com and click on the link on the right-hand side of the page. Each purchase helps support the show. You know, you're an atheist, you're a non-believer, and I respect that. That's fine. I don't look down on you. I don't think you're a pinhead.

Thank you. If you want to be an atheist, that's why we have America. You can be it. But why are you messing around with my tradition? Why are you messing around with christmas just leave it alone is there a compelling reason for you to mess around with it well we're only messing around we're not messing around with anything we're stopping the government from preferring one religion over another okay what religion is involved with christmas what religion christian... That's not a religion. That's a philosophy.

If the government were saying that the Methodist religion, all right, deserves a special place in the public square, I would be on your side. So you're going to actually tell me on live television that Christianity is not a religion. Correct. It is a philosophy. You and I are going to fundamentally disagree on that point. You are wrong. No, that's fine. You can call me that. Roman Catholicism is a philosophy. You and I are going to fundamentally disagree on that point. You are wrong. No, that's fine. You can call me that. Roman Catholicism is a religion. Judaism is a religion. They are sects of Christianity. And you know what? It's really not cool for you to try and cloud this issue.

This issue is about religious neutrality from the government. The government says that the government is not allowed to pick sides. Now, Christmas tree is a secular symbol. It's a secular symbol. It has nothing to do with Christianity. What's that word? What's that first word? Secular symbol. Christmas. A Christmas tree. Christmas is a Christmas tree. Now, look. This is so unreasonable. You are so unreasonable. No, it's not unreasonable. It's frightening. I'm not unreasonable at all. You absolutely are. I'm saying the government has to be fair. The government has to not take sides.

Everybody is equal. It's a federal. Everybody has the same rights. It doesn't matter. It's a federal holiday. Why don't you get off your butt and get a revolt and see how far you go? Of course you don't, because your view is insane. No, it's not.

You can celebrate Christmas without being a Christian. Actually, you can celebrate Christmas without being a Christian by force because you can't go to work. You can't get your mail. You can't go to the bank. You can't go to work? No, you can't. You can't? No, you can't.

Yes, you can. Really? Are you going to be working on Christmas? I don't work on Christmas. 99% of the country doesn't either because it's a federal holiday, which is illegal. You and your merry band of fascists. Fascists. Yeah, fascists.

You get a revoke. You call me a fascist. Absolutely. I am a patriot, sir. You are a fascist. I am a patriot who's taking the craziest notion that everybody in this country is equal and that the government has to treat everybody fairly. has to treat everybody fairly. Be advised that this show is not for children,

the faint of heart, or the easily offended. The explicit tag is there for a reason. This is Cognitive Dissonance. Every episode we blast anyone who gets in our way. We bring critical thinking, skepticism, and irreverence to any topic that makes the news, makes it big, or makes us mad. It's skeptical. It's political. And there is no welcome, Matt. We have a big show today. A very big show. Very, very big show. We have Chuck from Irreligiosophy.

This is what our listeners have been asking for ever since we started this crappy show. Hey, why aren't you guys actually Irreligiosophy? Well, today, a third of us are Irreligiosophy. We have Chuck on the show. Welcome to Cognitive Dissonance. Hey, thanks for having me. Ever since I kind of stopped doing my show, the same thing happened. My two or three remaining fans said, why don't you get together with Cognitive Dissonance? And I said, I have no idea who they are.

That's why. Right, and that's a fucking valid reason right there. That is a stopping point for a lot of people. Yeah, I mean, you guys hadn't heard of irreligiosity before you started this, right? No, we hadn't at all. No. It's true. Although, although now that I've listened to some of the back catalog, I'm sad that I missed it while it was up. Well, fuck you. So every time, every time we interviewed someone on irreligiosophy, they'd never, I don't think anyone had ever heard of us before. Yeah, yeah. That happens to us

all the time. Well, you know, the problem is I didn't get a personal invite from you, Chuck. When you started the show, I didn't get a phone call saying, hey,

you don't know me, but I'm Chuck and I'm going to start a podcast. So I had no idea it existed. That's what I should have done. It would have been a lot more popular had I done that.

Yeah. Robodial. You just got to robodial America. Hello, this is Chuck. I'm that. Yeah. RoboDial. You just got a RoboDial America. Hello, this is Chuck. I'm starting a podcast. And the RoboDial would probably be vastly more intelligent than the subject of our very first story.

This story comes from, well, shockingly enough, the Friendly Atheist blog, but also, I mean, really, Fox News enough, the friendly atheist blog, but also, I mean, really, Fox News and anywhere that you can find Bill O'Reilly crying into his soup. Bill O'Reilly claims Christianity is not a religion. It's a philosophy. I've heard millions of pastors all over the country are upset that their tax deductions will be taken away from them by Bill O'Reilly. Chuck, what do you think of this story? You know, the last time David Silverman was on Bill O'Reilly, they did those two memes,

right? Yeah. David Silverman jaw-dropping the goatee guy, like, what in the fuck are you talking about? The tide goes in, tide goes out. You know, can't explain that. You know, my jaw. Can't explain that. My jaw dropped when he said that. He's saying,

what religion is involved in Christmas? And Silverman did the same thing. He's like, the fuck? Christianity. No, no, no. That's not a religion. That's a philosophy. What are you, a fucking idiot? It's a philosophy. It's not a religion. It's never philosophy. What are you, a fucking idiot? It's a philosophy. It's not a religion.

It's never been a religion. What are you talking about? When I majored in philosophy, by the way, it was all about Christianity. It was the entire thing. It was all Christianity. Yeah, and you know, it's interesting because a philosophy is, you know, a critical analysis, a critical inquiry about fundamental assumptions and beliefs. What is critical about religion?

When are you being critical of your own? I mean, that's the question I have. It's like if I'm being critical about my own beliefs, it doesn't even fall under the auspices of philosophy at all. the auspices of philosophy at all. Yeah, the philosophy of Christianity is just listen to me, pay me a bunch of money, and turn the other way while I suck your kid's dick. I mean, that's it. That's about it. That's it in a nutshell.

What it seems to me, like, the thing that philosophy does, like, no matter what the philosophy seems to revolve around, it's, you know, it's trying to, it's driving at answering some question. But religion doesn't drive to answer a question. It starts with the answer and then works backwards to all the questions. It starts with the answer and then imposes that answer upon any question that it's attached to. It is antithetical, definitionally antithetical to religion, I would think. Yeah, there is some Christian philosophy.

I mean you have Augustine. You've got Aquinas. You've got St. Anselm. And you can argue back and forth about how good it is. I'm not particularly impressed by any of it, but it was massively influential throughout the Middle Ages. But you're right. I mean, as far as science now, science has replaced the big, overweening questions about, you know, how does nature work? How does lightning work? Why do we see rainbows?

What is the sun? All that stuff has been taken over by science. So there's no philosopher asking now, hmm, you really think fusion happens in the sun? You know, it's ridiculous. I can't get my mind around what the fuck Bill O'Reilly is trying to say here. The last 2,000 years have just been kind of a sham. We were kind of masquerading as a religion. And actually the whole time we've been a philosophy.

Just like Plato's theory of forms or Aristotle's virtue ethics. time we've been a philosophy, just like Plato's theory of forms or Aristotle's virtue ethics. It's just been a philosophy. I don't know about you, but I put up a Heidegger tree every year. It's not a Christmas tree. I just discuss the being of the being with my wife and we sit around until the night before being every year. And it's awesome. I think it's great. It's the most unbelievably overly complex tree possible. You sit in front of the tree scrutinizing it desperately for some kind of coherence. I don't know this tree. I don't understand this tree.

I'm going to say I don't know why Heidegger was so influential either. I mean, this shit just happens. I think people have a hard time understanding it and so then they spend the next 50 years trying to figure this shit out. And then they find out that it's not worth figuring out in the first place. Did you catch him? Did you catch Bill O'Reilly when he was saying it's not a religion? It's a philosophy. You know, Methodism is a religion.

The Presbyterians have a religion. Yeah, what? Judaism is a religion. That was great. Judaism gets one lump. Like, Judaism is just a lump. Like, there's a big lump of Judaism. We got it over here.

It's kind of heavy. It's just off to the left. But, like, Christianity has to be broken into its sects in order to be religious. And the best part of that is, like, that was his gotcha moment. You could tell that he had thought about that the night before. is like that was his gotcha moment you could tell that he had thought about that the night before like laying in bed in his fucking footie pajamas like with his guppa cocoa by the bedside ha ha i'm gonna get that atheist silverman i'm gonna declare it's just not a religion yeah he thought he thought he was he was pulling one over on him definitely and i think he's still smarting from

the last time silverman was on and and he looked like such a goddamn idiot on that show. He looked like such a goober. When he's like, the moon, you can't explain the fucking tides. You can't explain that. You're like, are you serious? Really? You can't explain the tides? Can't explain that.

Never a misunderstanding or whatever. Oh, gosh. And there's a part of this that is where Bill kind of gives up because Bill first gets mad and starts pointing his finger and waving his finger at him. He's like, don't you tell me what I think. And then immediately afterwards calls Silverman a fascist. Yeah. That was good. I wanted – he came back with I'm a patriot.

All I'm trying to do is – I wanted him to say, let me get this straight, Bill. You are equating trying to get a government to follow its own fucking laws with the murder of six million Jews. That's what you're equating. Hey, you say tomato. I say tomato. I don't understand. I think you're splitting hairs, Chuck.

It's the same fucking thing. Look, I mean, Mussolini, pretty much the same thing. Pretty much the same thing as enforcing the constitutional protections and guarantees. I mean, it's the same thing. Trying to get the nativity scene out of a public square or possibly the Ten Commandments. Same thing as the murder of everyone who disagrees with you I can't see a difference trying to get zyklon B out of the public sphere this job is terrible we go through more sanitation engineers this way oh Oh, my God.

And he's telling this to a Jew himself. So that was icing on the cake. So now Silverman sometimes is a hit or a miss. And I've seen him on Fox News before. And we've been critical of him in the past. How do you think he did here? Could you grade his performance? I mean, obviously, I certainly wouldn't want his job. I think it would be a difficult job to have to look. I mean,

I don't even know how well I do against Bill O'Reilly. I just laugh at him more than anything else. But I'd probably fail if I was going to be up there trying to argue with him. How do you think he did? Yeah, I think it's tough on the show. I would give him a B to a B+. I think he did pretty good. He nailed him on a couple contradictory points. It's so tough on his show because he'll start to make a point and O'Reilly will cut him off. And he did that so many times, and I

think he was trying to do it to get him angry, and it finally worked. He got angry toward the end of the show with that little segment. But, you know, overall, I think he did a really good job. I think Bill O'Reilly came off looking like a raging lunatic. And Silverman came off looking, you know, a little less lunatic-y, I guess. Lunatic-y, yeah.

Isn't the problem, though, that, I mean, the only one that's going to be exposed to this are either people who are going to be laughing at Bill O'Reilly, who at no time in their lives will ever do anything other than laugh at Bill O'Reilly, and people who still watch Bill O'Reilly, who at no time in their lives are ever going to be convinced by David Silverman. Sure. Right? I mean, it's Bill O'Reilly. I mean, the deck is stacked the moment you walk onto that show. You walk onto that show, it's not like you're walking onto this, you know, equal footing at all. I mean, everything about that show is just absolutely stacked against you.

You're on his home turf. Walking onto that show seems like a lose, lose, lose. Yeah, the best you can hope for is to get in a couple of zingers, I think. And I think he did. I think he came off looking a whole lot better than O'Reilly did, actually. Of course, you know, the people who watch the show, who watch Fox News and actually sit there and watch entire episodes of Bill O'Reilly will probably, you know, they're probably the same people who goes, yeah, who knows how the fucking moon got there? I don't know. They're the same people who are like, that silverman does kind of look like Hitler.

I mean, just a little. You are a fascist trying to get those Christmas trees out. And can you believe it when he asked, you know, Christmas trees secular. What's religious about that? Well, what's the first word there, Bill? I just couldn't believe it. Well, maybe if you just declare it true. Like, I think that's first word there, Bill? I just couldn't believe it. Well, maybe if you just declare it true. Like, I think that's Bill's tactic, right?

He'll just be like, this is a thing. Wait, no, that's not really true. This is the thing! You're fucked whenever he starts a conversation with, hey, I respect you. I don't think you're a pinhead. That's how he began. You've got to be like, wait a minute. There was a possibility before we started this that you thought I was a fucking pinhead. That's how we began. You've got to be like, wait a minute, there was a possibility before we started

this that you thought I was a fucking pinhead? I hadn't considered that. I do think you're a fascist, but not a pinhead. Pinhead's much lower on the list than fascist, evidently. Yeah, shoving his finger in the guy's face. I was impressed

that fisticuffs didn't break out. They've been pretty lame fisticuffs, though, admittedly. O'Reilly's pretty tall. I bet he could take silver. He's got a wingspan on that guy. I bet he's a scrapper. Look at that guy. I bet he's a scrapper.

He'll surprise you. I bet he fights dirty. That pink tie. Yeah. So we're going to have Chuck back on at the end of the show. For those of you who are not familiar with this show, I mean, who am I kidding? It's fucking Chuck who's bringing the people. So you're obviously familiar with this show.

You know that he'll be on at the very end of the show, and you'll just have to listen to other news stuff until then. their news stuff until then. It's Network News. News. News. News. So, Cecil, this story is from ArsTechnica.com.

What? Even the title. Even the title. Even the very fucking beginning of this story suggests how fucking lunatic nuts this thing is. If arrested for child porn, don't email threats to rape, kill a federal agent. You heard it here first folks. Ars Technica.

This story is about a fucking crazy dude who is also according to his own testimony the best damn youth minister this side of the Mississippi. Mississippi. Who gets busted for child porn and then fucking flips the fuck out. Yeah, he tries to kill himself and then he sends out threatening letters.

Yeah, his attempt to kill himself is preceded with, like, just hosts of craziness. Like, he's just—this dude is caught up in as much crazy as possible. The idea that this guy at some point was a youth minister? Yeah. Because here's the thing about crazy. Crazy usually is an insidious process, right? Yeah. It's not like you wake up and you're like, oh, man, what time is it?

7.30. Blah! It's not generally the way it works. It's crazy fucking time. So this dude's been, he's got these notes that I think he thought was going to protect him from getting busted on Saturday mornings. Check Norton and Defender and tune up. Delete browsing history. The notes are kind of awesome because they're photocopied.

And you're right, Tom. The first one's check Norton, Defender, and tune up. And then it's like delete browsing history. And then it's like run disk cleanup on his computer. It's like trying to figure out how to get rid of all the kiddie porneas on there. There's a note that wasn't photocopied on here that just said, put the lotion in the basket or else it gets the hose again.

It's like if the FBI's forensic analysis of your computer is done by an 11-year-old, then yes, maybe this might work. This might work. But one has to think that they are slightly more sophisticated. I mean, who am I fucking kidding? This would work for me, but your average 11-year-old at this point

is more technologically savvy. They would find your fucking child porn. Right, that's what I was thinking to myself. I was like, oh, this will fool mom. Right. Yeah. Right I was thinking like to myself. I was like, oh, you know, this old full mom. Right. Yeah. Right. And that's all it's there for.

And the guy has to write notes. Like he's worried enough about it. He's worried enough about getting caught with the kiddie porn and a youth minister. He's worried enough about getting caught with the kiddie porn that he clearly knows like, okay, this is something I've got to be vigilant about. But you know what what I'm not good at? Being vigilant about stuff.

So I have to make notes, which he then puts in his safe. So he has to be vigilant about going to the safe and reading his notes to be vigilant to what... Well, chances are he's going to the safe because they found thumb drives of kiddie porn in

his safe he says he'd never seen them or whatever he'd only looked at him years ago or whatever but chances are this guy's got a whole fucking book full of that stuff you know what i mean like if he's if that's what he's using to get off then that's what he's using to get off right and then they say like that he says that but then the analysis showed that he'd accessed some of the files just hours before they raided his house. So he's still wanking it to this stuff. I mean, who the fuck are you kidding? His threat, Cecil, when he finally becomes totally unglued, I've got to read his crazy letter. An eye for an eye, bitch.

Remember the one youth that didn't break his drug habit? He's deep in organized crime now, but he still trusts me, and I trust him. There's a $3,000 bounty. Only $3,000? You couldn't get a motherfucker to wash your car for $3,000.

Are you serious? $3,000 bounty. There's a $3, dollar bounty on your bitch ass shut the fuck up they won't get you right away they'll wait until the police stop watching you then boom bitch you're dead i've instructed them to make your death as painful drawn out and humiliating as possible. I got to tell you, Cecil, if I'm being killed, I'm not worried about also being humiliated. Those two things, like one cancels the other at some point.

You're like, you know what? All right, my pants are down. I'm covered in feces. Normally, not my best day. But I'm about to be killed. I got some higher priorities at the moment than people see in my fucking shit-covered wang.

I mean, you've got to tell that this guy is completely unglued, though, because he didn't he order the kiddie porn just to be delivered directly to his house? And he sent a check with his name on it? The memo section was like, kiddie porn.

Oh, that's awesome, man. Hey, did my check clear for the kiddie porn? He goes and buys a certified check at the bank. In the memo, I want you to put kiddie porn on there. You can call it just child pornography if you want. Like, we in the biz call it kiddie porn. Jake from Two and a Half Men means nothing. He is a non-existent character.

Two and a Half Men means nothing. He is non-existent character. He's... Two and a Half Men, if you watch Two and a Half Men, please stop watching Two and a Half Men. I'm on Two and a Half Men. I don't want to be on it. Please stop watching it. Please stop filling your head with filth. Please. It's, you know, people say it's just entertainment. It's, you know, people say it's just entertainment. The fact that it's entertainment, it's... Do some research on the effects of television in your brain, and I promise you, you'll have a decision to make when it comes to the television, and especially with what you watch on the television. It's bad news. It's bad news.

So that's coming. I don't know if it means any more coming from me, but you might not have heard it otherwise. So just watch out. Watch out because a lot of people don't like to think about how deceptive the enemy is. He's been doing this for a lot longer than any of us have been around. So we can't play around. There's no playing around when it comes to eternity. So Cecil, all over the tubes. This is from TMZ.com, but it's also kind of everywhere.

Angus T. Jones from a show called Two and a Half Men, which I've never seen. I don't even know it. He's evidently like a star of the show or what have you. And he is pleading with his fans to stop watching it because it contains nothing but filth that contradicts his deep Christian values. Except for when he's making $350,000 an episode to produce it. Except for when he's making $350,000 an episode to produce it. Yeah, you just heard a clip of him talking about this. He's talking to somebody.

I don't know exactly who he's talking to. I love the part in this where he's like talking about, man, Satan. He doesn't say Satan. He just says he. But you know who he's talking about. He's like, he's so devious and he's been at this so much longer than we have. And he's just out to get you. And I'm thinking, okay, so you obviously think that your show is fucking satanic, is at least influenced by Satan to get people to like filth.

Why are you still fucking doing it, man? Yeah, well, he's doing it because he's getting $350,000 an episode. He later says that, you know, he would quit, but he's under contract. Well, if I really felt like my morals were being just completely fucking shredded by the content of what I do for a living, I wouldn't be worried about breaking my fucking contract. I'd break my contract, pay the penalty for breaking my contract, and be like, well, my fucking eternal soul is saved. If I really think that's what's at stake,

if I think that not only my soul is at stake, but that the thing that I'm producing has the ability to hurt other people, and he's still doing it, he's like, well, I'm under contract. You know, civil law, Trump's God's law. I'm still a piece of shit. Look, you know what I mean? I signed a contract a couple years ago that I was going to kill hookers for a living, and I've just got to keep killing these hookers, or else I won't

get my check. You know what I mean? I don't like it any more than the hookers do. I want to read his non-apology because obviously when you say some stupid shit and you're in Hollywood, you have to apologize for it. Or if you're Charlie Sheen, you have to do a stand-up routine about it.

But he basically said this. He said, without qualification, I am grateful to and have the highest regard and respect for all the wonderful people on Two and a Half Men. I don't think there are any wonderful people on that show, but anyway. With whom I have worked over the past 10 years who have become an extension of my family. I apologize if my remarks reflect me showing indifference and disrespect of my colleagues and lack of appreciation of this extraordinary opportunity of which I have been blessed.

That is the most non-apology ever. Like he's not saying he's sorry. He's just apologizing to the people on the show. He's not saying the show is not filth and you should watch it because he specifically says don't watch the show. Well, and how confusing is this? I have been blessed to be on this show. By Satan.

By Satan? Yeah. It blessed to be on this show. By Satan. By Satan? Yeah. It has to be by Satan. The show promotes, in his mind, it promotes satanic fucking values and filth and degradation of moral character. Yet he's blessed to be on it? How does that work?

You see, I'm blessed financially. That's how I'm blessed. He says later in the article that he turned to religion after realizing his life was on a downward trend, which included drug use and speeding tickets. I love the speeding tickets part. You know, the only way a two-and-a-half-men show is, you know, I mean, what does he think the two-and-a-half-men show is that if it's so bad for people to watch? Is it a guy getting raped by two dudes and a midget? Is that what it is? I don't understand how it can be possibly construed.

It's on network television. They can't show boobies. They can't say shit or even ass some of the times. I mean, really? This is what you're worried about? Yeah, this is Satan's big plan is to get... And all it corrupted so far was Charlie's shit. Really? It's fucking dick and fart jokes with crazy

innuendo because they can't even say dick or fart. He's not protesting like two girls in one cup. Right? It's not like he's like, hey, now that's really some genuine filth you should not watch. That is fucking inappropriate every way. Inappropriate for all audiences.

This video is rated NO! No! Allahu Akbar Allahu Akbar Allahu Akbar Allahu Akbar Allahu Akbar This story is from the Sydney Morning Herald.

Afghan girl killed over refusal to wed. I hate even saying this. Two men arrested for slitting the throat of a 15-year-old Afghan girl after her family refused a marriage proposal. If this isn't a culture that says, I fucking own you. Right. How dare you be autonomous? I don't know what is. If at some point a fucking 15-year-old girl has no business saying yes or no to being married anyway.

Right. It's a child. It's ridiculous. What a horrifying story. It's awful. And it's just like you say. It's all about ownership, right? This is what it feels like.

It's like they murdered their dog. They're trying to injure the family by murdering a piece of their property or destroying. They're vandalizing, basically. Like murder over there is vandalism because the person is a piece of property. It says here, it says the two men attacked her and slit her throat with a knife. They were arrested and are in police custody. And that's the thing is over there in Afghanistan, they don't play hard to get. They play easy to bury.

Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, yeah. That's a small digging hole. But really, is that going to win her over? Oh, I cut her throat. No, we've been happily married for 10 years.

Right? This is a whole new meaning to say yes to the dress. That's all he is. Right? It's like, don't turn into a bridezilla. I'll fucking kill you. Another red dress? Oh, my God.

And how do you even decide? Like, the women look like fucking caspers. How do you figure out, like, oh, yeah, I'm going to ask out that casper, not the other casper. They all look like friendly ghosts. They do. You're not allowed to talk to them. You're not allowed to see them. You're not allowed to interact unless you're murdering them.

How are you supposed to court somebody? It's ridiculous. Let me tell you, the Afghanistan-y drag queens are the most boring drag queens in history. Right. Stand up. They're like, we look the same. Shapeless and baggy. I'm shapeless and baggy.

That's nothing to be proud of. No kidding. Just wear grunge clothes in the United States and you'll be fine. Be a fat man in his middle ages. Working on it. Yeah. Working on it. Yeah. Working on it. This story also mentions, it says extreme violence against women and girls remains a major problem in the conservative Muslim nation.

And then it goes on to say last month a 20-year-old woman was beheaded by her husband's family after she refused to become a prostitute. What? And in September, five people were arrested over the public flogging of a 16-year-old girl for having an affair. The boyfriend, now this woman got lashed 100 times. The dude she supposedly had an affair with got fined. There is no parody here. Like there is no equity here. This is barbarism. It is. It's is no equity here. This is barbarism.

It is. It's misogyny. It's plain and simple. And this is – it's my hope that more and more the women there will eventually learn about other cultures and learn about other places in the world where people don't – where women don't have to put up with this, where human beings don't have to put up with this shit. And they start to change things. It's not going to happen quickly, but I hope it happens eventually. So we decided, we heard a time, we got a bunch of letters. We get letters all the time about conservapedia. We should do conservapedia. We should talk about conservapedia. We should figure out conservapedia. I don't know, just use them as story bait. The thing is, is conservapedia is so easy to make fun of.

It's even easier than like Pat Robertson. It's so simple because you just read it. All you have to do is read it. So we decided what we do is just read it. So we have a new segment we're trying out called What the Actual Fuck, Conservapedia. So here's our first reading. Feminism originally was an expression used by suffragettes, who were predominantly pro-life, to obtain the right for women to vote in the early 1900s in the United States and the United Kingdom.

By the 1970s, however, liberals had changed the meaning to represent people who favored abortion and identical roles or quotas for women in the military and in society as a whole. roles or quotas for women in the military and in society as a whole. Specifically, a modern feminist denies or downplays differences between men and women, opposes the encouragement of homemaking and child rearing for women, and seeks to participate in predominantly male activities, possibly including sexual intercourse with women. Most modern feminists do not want gender equality. They want power for the female left. Most modern feminists view traditional marriage as unacceptably patriarchal. Most modern feminists belittle and mock other women who desire to have children or raise a

family. Most modern feminists shirk traditional gender activities, like baking. Most modern feminists prefer that women wear pants rather than dresses, presumably because men do. Most modern feminists advocate for women in combat in the military just like men, and co-ed submarines. Most modern feminists refuse to take her husband's last name when marrying. Most modern feminists often condemn the God-given order of gender roles, as laid out in the Holy Bible. Most modern feminists object to being addressed as ma'am, or feminine nicknames such as sweetheart or honey. Object to other female-only names such as temptress. Most modern feminists take offense at grammatical rules of the English language, like using the pronoun he when referring to

hypothetical slash anonymous person or phrases like fireman and stewardess. Most modern feminists support the homosexual agenda. So we're going to take a quick break, give you some information to contact us. We're going to be back right after this, and then be sure to stay tuned for Chuck later on in the show from E-Religiosophy. Want to contact Cognitive Dissonance? Visit them on Facebook. You can find the link at the website, dissonancepod.com, or type it in the Facebook search bar. Be sure to follow the guys on Twitter. Their handle is at Dissonance underscore pod. The guys also post to Google Plus now too, so check them out there. And if you'd like to email them, you can do so at dissonance.podcast at gmail.com.

You can also leave a comment on the blog at their webpage or give them a call Call at 740-74-DOUBT. That's 740-743-6828. Long distance rates apply. And to everyone who listens, shares, retweets, or rates the show, Cognitive Dissonance would like to cordially thank you for all of your fucking support. Cecil, this story is from the BBC. Manchester baby boy bled to death after circumcision. A four-week-old boy. Four weeks.

Bled to death after a home circumcision carried out by a nurse. Fucking, yeah, right, a nurse. First of all. Oh, come on. That is just, I mean, any kind of medical training at all has to tell you that showing up in somebody's home in an unsterile environment, rubbing a kid's – a four-week-old kid's penis with olive oil and then fucking slicing it and not taking care with the wound is probably not the best choice medically. How does this fucking happen? I'm going to read directly from the article.

It says, no pain relief. Now, this is from BBC. It says, the defendant brought her, and it's in quotes, instruments out of her handbag and dipped a pair of scissors into water in a kidney dish. She carried out the procedure with no anesthetic or local pain relief before cleaning the wound with cotton wool and apply to bandage the court heard. Okay, so without anesthetic, you know, the parents, I mean, I'm not a parent, but let me just fucking use my cat. If I went to the vet and the vet said, I'm going to fucking do this procedure on your cat, but I'm not going to give it any anesthetic. I'm going to fucking amputate its paw or something.

Like immediately I would be like, um, no you're not, dude. You're not going to fucking put my pet through that kind of fucking pain. And it's just a fucking cat. It's not part of me. It doesn't have the same fucking DNA as me. Like, are your fucking parent switches off? You fucking monsters

that you're going to cut your baby's fucking penis off? Part of his penis off without anesthetic? You are a fucking degenerate. You are the worst type of person if that's what you're going to do without any kind of anesthetic. Yeah, I don't understand the reason for this. It doesn't—it's so entirely unnecessary. They could have had this procedure done at the hospital.

But they chose to call this lunatic and invite this person into their home and they they take out like you said that the instruments are in quotes they left this article says that they left a ragged wound that bled the article goes on further to say that a sixth of a pint of blood in a child this young this is four This is, you're fucking 28 days into the world. Like, you're 28 days fucking out of the uterus. A sixth of a pint can be fatal. Like, if my kid is going to bleed at all, if they're going to, this is going to be like, well, we're going to do this thing.

Is it going to cause him to bleed? Well, we're going to use a fucking knife. So, yeah, it's going to cause him to bleed. We're going to do that in a place where it's safe. No kidding. I'm going to gonna everything about this just screams backward everything about this and i i refuse to even be kind about it it just screams this is backward this is an ancient blood ritual there's no fucking reason to do it anymore why are you cutting this thing off like you said you wouldn't do this without an aesthetic motherfucker i wouldn't let somebody do this to a cow i was gonna eat yeah you'd be like

you'd be like well what time's the cow get killed fucking noon what time are we having steak 2 30 what time is it now 9 15 let's cut its ear off for no reason what yeah no i don't care are you gonna fucking kill it and i will eat it and I don't want you to do something fucking just mean to it. Just mean. Like, why are we doing it? I don't know. Mean. I got to say, this story is fucking heart-wrenching, but it's hard not to laugh at the kid's name.

His name is Good Luck Kahlbergs. And I was like, now that's a name that's really inappropriate. I guess the only other more inappropriate name would have been Stitch Coburgs. What's his nickname? How dare you? You know, Cecil, I know you've said that sometimes you have a hard time with your irony meter. Yeah. When a baby's name is good luck.

And he did. And then this. That's irony. Is that irony, Tom? that is irony we've mined to irony we've got there it's like what a beautiful baby what do you want to name it i don't good luck with that you want answers i think i'm entitled you want. You want answers! I want the truth! You can't handle the truth! Alternet.org has this story. Stop with the demon sex already.

Christian Group says demon sex makes you gay. A Christian magazine warns that homosexuality is caused by sex with demons. Or gay sex. Gay demons? Well, I mean, you know, like, look, if you want to be, if you're afraid of being called gay, then don't be gay. Yeah, I think that's probably the best option. Right? In this Christian magazine.

I don't think there's anything wrong with being gay, but if you don't want to be called gay, then you shouldn't be gay. Yeah, well, then there you go. Problem solved. I mean, I'm not a fucking a fucking rocket surgeon, but I think that I think that, you know, I think I figured this out for him. This story is just so fucking bizarre.

Can demons engage in sexual behaviors with humans? Well, no, they don't exist. The magazine asks. Why, yes, they can. I missed that one. At least according to the article's primary source, a former stripper turned ministry leader named Contessa Adams. She says,

these spiritual rapists, as Adams describes in her book, consequences, often prey on people by performing sexual acts through nightmares and erotic dreams. Either that, Cecil, or they're having nightmares and erotic dreams. Either that, Cecil, or they're having nightmares and erotic dreams. Yeah. There's no

fucking demons here. It's just dreams. Well, they have some weird... This is the same people who thought that they need to pound stakes in front of other temples of other denominations. I don't remember that. They think that there's actually demons in the White House

and there's real demons. There's like a spiritual war. What is that guy's name? Angle? There's a guy. I want to say his name is Angle or something. But he's the guy who was like talking about the Hulk. You remember that clip we played where he was like the Hulk smashes?

Oh, yeah, that guy. That guy's all crazy. Well, that guy is part of this movement, right? And I'm going to read here real quickly. He's talking about this movement, this new apostolic reformation. Bruce Wilson, who's reported on the movement for years, tells Alternet, For the apostles and prophets of the new apostolic reformation, demon powers and also divine curses incurred by human unfaithfulness to God's plan are at the root of virtually any and all conceivable misfortunes. From crime trends, drops in the stock market, and declining SAT scores to headaches and dandruff.

And I mean that. Listen, Tom. The last sentence is the corker, and I mean that literally. Dandruff? There's demons that cause dandruff? Is head and shoulders an exorcism? Head and shoulders. A lot of people don't know head and shoulders is actually just holy water.

That's all it is. Selsun blue, totally holy water. That's why you can feel the burn. Yeah, exactly. It's because you're possessed by demons. And it's burning the devils off when you're getting the dandruff out. by demons. And it's burning the devils off when you're getting the dandruff out. You know, it's so

funny because someone I know once worked with people who thought that there were all these micro demons, right? Like sugar demons that made you eat sugar and like fat demons that made you eat fat and like speeding demons that made you drive too

fast. Everything that you did wasn't caused by you just being like, I like the way sweet things taste. That's the endorphin demon. Right. It's like, well, my tongue enjoys sweet. That's just a thing. That's a fucking evolutionary.

No, of course it's not. It's demons. It's demons that make you want trans fats in the Oreos. It's not fucking bad choices that you're making personally. I look at this and I think, well, first of all, it's fucking insane on its face. Like demon sex in your dreams makes you crazy. Demon sex, I can't see it. Sexy demon dreams make you gay or whatever.

Like that's, I don't even, I can't even begin to suss out how you would get there from here. But it just sounds like a way to avoid personal responsibility for anything. Right. Which is crazy because you know the people that believe this are all conservatives. And personal responsibility is their fucking clarion call. But demons avoid personal responsibility by pushing it off onto a supernatural force. That's an interesting point, Tom.

It's something I hadn't considered. And it's true because they are rejecting all the personal responsibility for this by saying that they're being possessed by demons. This is no different, though, than the blasting where the people just scream to get the demons out of other people or this, which is,

you know, those people pray over, you know, I want, what I want to see, what I want to see is like a prayer session of the new apostolic reformation where they're chanting over somebody's head to get rid of their dandruff,

where they're all holding hands around, you know, because demons, you know, the cells in blue, we were talking about earlier when you put the cells in blue on there, it just doesn't act. You have to actually rub it in your scalp because the demons get nice and deep in there. They get sort of hooked in there.

And there's no way that if you just put it on, you just rubbed it on, demons aren't going anywhere. You've got to actually rub that in. You ought to actually massage the scalp. And you might have to rinse and repeat. And if you miss a spot, like the demons are like, ha, ha ha ha, you missed the spot over by your ear. Little bits of dandruff still. Like, that's a demon's fucking magic.

Wouldn't it suck to be the demon whose power is dandruff? That's the lamest power. It's like you're the shitty Pokemon. You know what I mean? It's like, what are you? It's like, fucking, I shoot lightning bolts out of my ass. What are you? I can be a little embarrassing at times. someone wears, like, a black shirt.

You're even worse than the eczema demon. Right? You're, like, mildly annoying at best. You're like explosive diarrhea demon totally blows you out of the water. Literally. Explosive diarrhea demon is a problem. Like farting on a date demon. That one problem. Like farting on a date demon. That one sucks.

Farting on a date demon. Oh, it wasn't me. It was my demon. That's cool. Sharting on a date is even worse. That's a terrible demon. That's a demon that makes you go home early and alone. Every shitty thing my body does is going to be a demon from now on.

I'm going to be like, oh, I fucking overslept. It was a fucking oversleepy demon. Late for the train demon. Right, it was a, you know, oh man, I fucking ate a pint of ice cream demon earlier. And as a result, I've got explosive diarrhea demon. Okay, so we are back with Chuck from Irreligiosophy. Now, Chuck, I think probably there's maybe two or three people in

our audience who don't know who you are or haven't heard of Irreligiosophy. Can you tell them about the podcast and about yourself a little? Yeah, we started Irreligiosophy because we were a little frustrated with the skeptical and atheist podcasts out there. We thought they were too boring, and we thought they didn't hit religion like it needed to be hit, like it needed to be taken on. And I think the number one purpose for doing a podcast is to entertain people. And if you can entertain them while also educating them, that's great. But first you need to entertain them. They won't listen if you don't entertain them. Right.

That's why you guys are what do you have? Seven or eight listeners now? Nine at the last count. Because George Ahrab was on our show. So he bumped it up to nine. That's listened, actually not listened. Turns out.

I think you tripled us at our peak. So yeah, you know, Leighton and I, my former co-host, we're both Mormons, we both grew up in Utah, so we come at religion from a Mormon bent, and you know, Mormons spend a lot of time teaching you why all

the other religions in the world are wrong. So... You had a full fucking case of ammunition, huh? Yeah, they are the one true church. And so they'll tell you that everyone else in the world is mistaken and we have the only true gospel. And how fortunate we are to have the true gospel when no one else does. That's how special you are as a kid.

And what a dick God is not to have shared it with everybody else. It's not how fortunate we are. It's like, man, that's fucking selfish of God if that's true. That's a flip side of that coin. And I thought even as a kid, I thought, well, wait a second. Utah

is such a small part. Most of the Mormons are in Utah in the world. And it's such a small part of the world. God must be this really poor communicator, right? Why can't he get this message? He's been out for almost 200 years. What's wrong with this guy? Oh, that's awesome. Now, one of the, there's that, there's like a bunch of quotes from people who all say, and I'm going to paraphrase, but basically, you're an atheist too, you just believe in one God less than me, something like that, right? Now, this is basically, I think that there should be a lot more Mormon atheists because they're just showing you why all the other gods are wrong and why all the other religions are wrong. It's just, I mean, it's so easy just to apply that one more time.

Yeah, I think you have a lot of skeptical Mormons, I think. The guy on Skeptoid is one. The guy who does Mr. Deity, he's LDS or formerly LDS. I think what happens when Mormons deconvert, they find out that it's a big scam, basically, is that they become atheists. I don't know of a whole lot of Mormons who have been taught all of their lives that every other church in the world is wrong. And then they just sneak into one of those churches. I mean, it doesn't make sense.

Well, because it sounds like they burn all those bridges for you. You know, like your whole life, you're like, well, if I can light that fire, light that fire, you're left standing on one bridge, that one goes. Yeah. You're just, all right, I'm in the river now. Let's party. That's interesting because when I finally let go of my faith, I did do something like that. I started reading books from other religions. I started reading books about Hinduism.

I started reading books about Hinduism. I started reading books about Buddhism, Taoism, just trying to see what other religions had to offer because I wasn't, I knew I wasn't Christian, but I was still sort of seeking. And I think that you're right. People will just, when they drop that sort of religion, when they drop the LDS church, they're just like, well, I don't need to seek anymore. It's all bullshit. Yeah, I went through none of that. I went through none of that seeking. For me, it was all just it kind of crumbled away, and it took me a little while to admit to myself I didn't believe it anymore. But there was no other active religion that was even an issue.

How old were you when it finally took? I always had questions, but i did the philosophy major in college and that started the ball really rolling uh the constant calls for evidence in medical school uh did it for me i think i admitted to myself i was an atheist first year of internships the first year residency uh so it was about a 10-year process, but I was probably 26, 27. So that's got to be kind of awkward in Utah. And you're still in Utah, correct? Yeah, I am in Utah, yeah.

That's not the place to be an atheist, my understanding. That's not like the atheist homeland. It's probably just like being an atheist in Alabama or Louisiana or some of these other Bible Belt states. It's just a different cult, different local cult that you're fighting against. an atheist in Alabama or Louisiana or some of these other Bible Belt states. It's just a different cult, different local cult that you're fighting against. But yeah, I'd probably say 90% of the people around me plus are LDS. My entire family is LDS. My wife's entire family is LDS.

Most of the people I know are LDS. Although I do work in Park City, which is an extremely liberal town. I'm going to say that extremely liberal town relative to Utah, I think. Can you tell us about the magic underwear? I mean, does it really give them magic powers? You know, you'll see that all the time. And it's something that Mormons do not like to talk about. But when you get of age, and I think for males it's 19, and you're going to go off on your mission, you go to this little temple ceremony. This is assuming that you get interviewed by your bishop or the local representative of the religion.

It's either a bishop or a stake president. And they ask you a bunch of questions to determine how worthy you are. Usually those are, do you follow the word of wisdom? Do you follow the law of chastity? Do you recognize? I don't like the sound of that one. I don't like that one either. That one, I'm not attracted to this so far.

I remember my buddy in college was converting to LDS to being a Mormon for his girlfriend. And he had just got the questions, and they asked him if he masturbated. And I thought, oh, my God, that's it. I'm never going to the temple. I mean, you'd have to be like, well, today? Have you masturbated? What are you fucking kidding me? I am made of meat, motherfucker. Of course I have masturbated. What are you fucking kidding me? I am made of meat, motherfucker.

Of course I have masturbated. I'm like, I guess you have to be a good liar. He's like, well, yeah, I kind of stretched the truth. Of course. Of course you did. And you stretched something else. I stretched the truth? You fucking lied.

It's a yes or no question. Have you done a thing? It's like, have you driven a car? You know, I've piloted the car. I thought about it. I had lustful thoughts about my car. I want to ask, did you go on a mission? No.

No. My parents thought that the church fell away early on when it gave up polygamy. So my parents are Mormon, but they don't go to church because they think it's not Mormon enough. They've fallen away from the original teachings of Joseph Smith, Brigham Young, John Taylor, etc., etc. So while my dad is not a polygamist in deed, he only has one wife that I know of. It's not for lack of trying. And I think that they still believe that they need to marry another wife in order to get to the highest level of the heaven, the celestial kingdom. So I never had an opportunity to go to the temple. Although we had a couple of return missionaries on our show, these brothers who went on missions, and they kind of told us all about the

strange rituals that they do inside the temple. Now, there was a video I sent you. Did you get a chance to see that one? I did. That's the first time I think I've seen, other than, you know, when they newly open the temples, you can go and walk around. And so if there's anything going around near you that they're building a temple, make sure you hit

the open house, because they'll let you... You have to put little booties on your feet, but you can walk around and you'll see the entire temple. You'll see the celestial room and everything. It's probably the only chance you'll get as a non-Mormon. Anyway, that's the first time I've seen an actual ceremony. I've heard it on the internet, but that was the first video I've seen. And my God, it was bizarre.

You know, Tom and I were talking this week and one of the things that he said to me, and I think we've said this both to each other, that that ritual, while it is bizarre, is really no more bizarre than, say, the Catholics thinking that you're actually chewing on Jesus. That's true. It's a different type of bizarre, but quantitatively probably no more bizarre now. And I think that, you know what, it really struck me as, well, this just feels newer. You know, you watch like the like you go to a Catholic mass and for many people that feels more familiar because, you know, the Christian population is so great in this country. So, you know, it feels familiar. So that, of course, lends it this this air of cred great in this country. So it feels familiar.

So that, of course, lends it this air of credence, this familiarity. But it also has had a lot of time to mature and develop. And when I watched this video, what occurred to me is like, well, yeah, I mean, it looks like a bunch of made up nonsense. OK, but it just doesn't look as mature. It looks like, well, they just haven't, you know, they haven't painted the treehouse yet. You know, they got the boards laid down.

They got the rope ladder out. They got the no girls allowed sign on. But they just, they haven't gotten around to painting it, like really putting the finishing touches. The trim is not up in the treehouse just yet. So it just makes it look a little more awkward. Particularly the room full of statue bowls. I like

the guy in the white tuxedo. I thought that was my favorite part. Because he kind of looks like a carnival barker. He does look like a carnival barker. And the Wizard of Oz dude who hides behind the curtain. And just shakes your hand in secret. Yeah, what weirded

me out about that is that dude just stood there in front of some altar, and I guess the stuff's recorded, right? So he's just standing there for like 20 minutes. Yeah. 20 minutes. He totally is. It's like I expected him to be like signing it

to the audience or something. Or at least give us some hand gestures, for God's sakes. Do something. Can you imagine the first time you do that, you're kind of nervous. Like, oh man, I got to get up in front of all these people. Do I hope I remember my parts? You don't actually have any fucking parts.

You stand there and smile like a goob. Really? Yeah, just smile like a great big goob, man. Make sure your fucking white suit is pressed and gaze beatifically out at the crowd. I got that. I love the little pop-ups, too, because they're trying to make Mormonism look as crazy as humanly possible. So this is obviously, they've taken this footage from some Mormon who's gone through the temple undercover, I guess, and done this. And then they're sticking some stuff on top of it.

Right. I have one here. Mormonism teaches that the Father, the Son, the Holy Ghost are three separate gods and that Mormons can also become gods after death. The number of Mormon gods is unlimited. And, you know, that's true. Every bit of that's true. But again, how is that more crazy than Jesus walked on water

or came back from the dead after three days? Oh, it's not. No, no, no. You'll get no argument here. That is not more crazy. That's just different crazy. Yeah, they say that they put it there like it's obviously insane. Oh, pfft.

These crazy Mormons. More than one God. Look at this. Look what they believe. They believe that God is three separate people, where as everyone knows, it's one being in three manifestations. It's a trifurcated God. Of course

it is. I love the planetary stuff too, because it really does remind me a lot of Scientology when they're talking about like they have that part where like there's three different beings up there talking to each other, like Elohim, Jehovah, and Michael. I mean, fucking Michael?

Like you brought Michael in on this? Anyway, Michael's in there and they're like, we must go down and organize the matter. And then they're like, yes, we must go down and organize the matter. Is there matter to be organized? Let us organize this matter. And you're like, okay, that's really strange. But it feels a lot like, it feels like Scientology of the turn of the century.

Yeah, someone told me that the original endowment ceremony was eight hours long. Eight hours. They said. And it wasn't recorded. You didn't have this little video. There were just a bunch of temple workers that kind of acted this shit out. You'd spend the entire day there.

It'd be like sitting at the DMV all fucking day. It'd be worse. Okay, before we move on, I want to talk about irreligiosity before we let you go. But I do want to ask one more question about the LDS Church. Now, Tom and I in the past have referred to the Book of Mormon as Bible fan fiction. What do you think? Is that an accurate description of what the Book of Mormon is?

Yeah, I would say probably Old Testament fan fiction. It has a lot more to do... The Book of Mormon is a lot more Old Testament than it is new. In the middle of it, Jesus makes an appearance in the Americas after beating the shit out of a bunch of cities that don't worship him anymore. And like volcanoes and shit sinks into this massive darkness. And then Jesus is like, huh? You gonna listen to me now, motherfuckers?

Huh? And they're all just like, you could have asked nice! What the fuck? And he gives the sermon on the mountain and all that shit and then he floats back up to heaven. And then they get in a bunch of wars and kill each other. So there's a little bit of New Testament in the middle,

but the rest of it's all Old Testament shit. Are black people evil? Yes. The Lamanites, and that's literally in there. I love the yes. The more evil you get, the darker your skin becomes. Shut the fuck up. Are you serious?

Yeah. There's one segment in the Book of Mormon where the Lamanites, those are the bad guys. So they're mostly black throughout the entire Book of Mormon. But there's one part where the Lamanites become more righteous and the Nephite prophet says, I am afraid these Lamanites skins are going to get lighter than yours if you guys don't get onto this ball

and start being good again. Literally. Unbelievable. Fuck. Oh my god. That's so outrageous. But it really does fit the times in which this was written. Yeah, you're talking early 1800s. But we got statements from leaders of the church in the early 1900s about how they went to the Hawaiian islands and they gave a lecture to these natives.

And you could see at the end of the lecture that their skins were whiter than the one that he began the lecture. Shut the fuck up. It would suck to be a missionary in Africa. Like, it's not taking. What's going on here? What's the matter with you people? I've been lecturing for hours. All I got is this terrible sunburn.

I'm getting worse. Oh, God. Yeah. So literally, that is true. They've tried to blunt that a little bit. They've taken some white skins and made them pure skins, but most of it's still in there. Do they ever protest outside of like an L.A. tan? Because it seems to me like that would be problematic.

It's like 10 tans for $40. Oh, my God. The devil's in there. They're not only getting a tan, they're watching pornography while they do it. Ultra-violent devils. Yeah, awesome. They're in there masturbating inside the tanning beds. So you talked a little bit about your podcast, The Religiosophy, why you started it.

You covered a ton of shit in there, and I've been picking and choosing my way through the back episodes. I really enjoyed—one of my favorites was the Scientology episode where you guys actually went to a temple of Scientology, and Layton got hooked up to a fucking machine at a certain point. It was a great episode. What were some of your favorite episodes that you had a chance to put together? My all-time favorite is LDS Advice to Young Men. That is about all the crazy advice that these LDS old guys are giving to the young men about masturbation. I mean, did you guys see the thing that—

How hard, how tight, whether you use Kleenex for cleanup, whether lube is important. What kind of advice are they giving? Sometimes it's good to use your imagination once in a while. Get away from the computer. One of them is that you shouldn't masturbate because you've got little tiny factories. And if you masturbate, that makes the factories work harder and harder and harder. And then you're stuck in this cycle where you're chronically masturbating and your factories are overproducing. So chronically masturbating and your factories are overproducing. So chronically masturbating means male, right?

That's what that means, right? It sounds like I'm a job creator at that point. Like, I've got factories working overtime for the economy. Yeah, well, they don't... See, that's why it's advice to young men, right? At the beginning of it, he says, I would hesitate to speak

to this congregation except that I know all the women are gone. So now I can feel comfortable about this topic because I wouldn't want to offend the women or, you know, introduce these terrible ideas into their head as if women never masturbate. Well, this is this is how the Mormons get around masturbation is they just marry a bunch of wives. Right. They're just like, well, I don't have to masturbate because I got like six or seven wives I can bang later on. You've never heard Mark Twain's little trip through Utah where he said, thank God that

a Mormon man will marry even one of these Mormon women. He should be called a saint by marrying two or three or four of them. Take that. You got fucking pwned by Mark Twain that's awesome the other is a Marky Peterson who was apostle at the time gave you

18 steps to stop masturbating and literally one of the last ones is you take your tie and tie your right hand to the bed post so you can't reach down there and yank it oh man well then you just have to the bedpost so you can't reach down there and yank it. Oh, man. Well, then you just have a visit from lefty.

You can't shirk your responsibilities. I mean, look, you could cut off both my fucking hands. I'd lose weight and become flexible and jerk that shit with my feet. I don't care what has to happen. We're getting the job done. A couple steps higher than that, he told you to wear like eight pair of pants to bed so you couldn't get in there with your left hand. Jesus, man. Like, it's so hot.

And you're in Utah, too. Oh, it's just, you know. Oh, my gosh. You have the worst batch of crotch rot in the history of mankind. You're like a fucking jawbreaker. You're like an everlasting gum stopper that's awesome so I like that one

a couple about I talked to Bob Price the Book of Mormons are pretty good where we talk about the crazy shit that goes in the Book of Mormons those are probably my favorites stay away from the Hindu episode don't listen to it. Do yourself a favor. No Hindus. Okay. Now, you did some interviews on your show. Do you have

any memorable interviews that you really enjoyed? Bob Price is my favorite. David Silverman's probably a close second. We interviewed him when he was trying to promote an atheist conference. And he's a pretty funny guy. I like him. What's next for Irreligiosophy? I know you've taken a break. You know, you've had a change in staff. Exactly. And what's next? What's on the horizon? Well, we're probably going to relaunch it sometime next year with new content. I haven't decided whether it's going to be named Unapologetics or Irreligiosophy, but it'll be back in some form with Matt Wakefield as a new host. Yeah, so far you've been in kind of a little bit of a war at this point with an author.

You did several podcasts in the last couple of months about a book, and they started, did they start a Facebook page about you? Yeah. So a little history on this one. We agreed to debate these morons from Evidence for Faith. That's Evidence number four, Faith. It's so leaked. At that point, did you know you, I mean, at that point, you know you win. You're like, oh, you're not even using words.

I'm going to win this pretty hands down. They're absolute young earth creationists. They believe that the Bible is literally true, that Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John actually sat there and wrote the Gospels, and they weren't written later. I mean, it's all this. It's amazing. So we debated them once on their show, and we debated them for an extra, like, two episodes on our show. And the one on our show, I think, was fairly embarrassing for them because they didn't talk about it since. Except for Kirk Hastings kept writing us emails.

And so he sent me an email, like, I hadn't heard from him in, like, six months. He said, thanks for all the publicity on the book uh i'm almost sold out of the first printing so i'm like all right fucker i'll give you some publicity he opened up a can that's what he did so we we did four episodes on his book and it's literally one of the worst um i thought c.s lewis was bad i thought uh ken ham was bad um kent Ken Ham was bad. Kent Hovind probably still takes the cake, but Kirk Hastings is fairly close up with him. So his Amazon book went from two reviews of four stars to something like 100 reviews and two stars. So he was totally cheesed off at that, and he started a Facebook page called the Question Irreligiosophy Project,

and then promptly banned anyone who would disagree with him. Now, I saw a little bit of this. I went to the Question Irreligiosophy Project on Facebook, which is funny. But the thing is, is lots of people were commenting, and they kept on coming back to the skeptics' guide form, and they're like, fuck, he deleted my post, and now I'm banned. I can't even go back. guide for him and they're like, fuck, he deleted my post and now I'm banned. I can't even go back. Like he is,

he just basically puts up, like he was making these really embarrassingly bad comics. Yeah. Oh, it was so awful. If you have an opportunity, you should search for it on Facebook because it's hilarious. It is so funny. The comics are so bad as

to be, I mean, they're cringe-worthy comics. They really are. He has no sense of how bad this stuff is. I think he's proud of them, honestly. That's why he's posted them. But they are. Well, this is a guy who believes the Bible is literally true. It's true.

One has to question his judgment at the outset. The fact that he's not putting together subtle, nuanced comics is not terribly surprising at this point. You would hope that he'd at least have some sort of sense of humor, but no, they're terrible. It has been removed. So, Chuck, if our one listener who hasn't heard of you wanted to find old episodes of Irreligiosophy

or watch for when you guys relaunch, where would they go? Good luck. We made the name Irreligiosophy as hard to spell as humanly possible. So that's the first step. You've got to figure out how to spell it. If you can't. If they can do that, then they can listen. Exactly.

If you can't, then fuck you. You don't deserve to listen to my show. You don't deserve it. If you can't spell made-up words, then fuck off. The thing is, Google autocorrects that shit. I don't know how to If you can't spell made-up words, then fuck off. The thing is, Google auto-corrects that shit. I don't know how to spell it, but I just start typing that shit

in Google like, oh, you really fucked up a word. You must mean irreligiosophy. Some of our listeners nominated us for the podcast awards, and that fucker had to read off all this shit, and he got to us,

and he's like, irrelig... Jesus, how do you pronounce that? That's awesome. I watched it this year. We got nominated for the podcast awards and he's like, Cognitive dissonance. And he's like, I don't know if I can pronounce that.

I'm like, you can't, sir. You have proven the point. And those are both just words. Two words, man. Not anything terribly. There's nothing crazy there. It's just cognitive and dissonance.

That makes me feel a little bit less good about myself. Thanks. Those were dictionary words, that asshole. Kogan. Well, Chuck, it was great having you on. It was great talking to you. I'm sure we're going to ask you to come back. It was an absolute blast.

Thanks for coming on. Yeah, you bet. Definitely. Just let me know. I'd ask you to come back. It was an absolute blast. Thanks for coming on. Yeah, you bet. Definitely. Just let me know. I'd be happy to come back. I got tons of free time now. Tom, we got a few voicemails this time, but sadly, the voicemails did not come through. mails this time, but sadly, the voice mails did not come through. I think a couple of the people,

one of them was using a voice, trying to make a voice, like a funny voice, but it didn't come through at all on the sound. It's just all crackly and weird. And then the last one, the one we got, I think we got one yesterday again, Tom, and it just totally did not come through. The person was singing and I don't know what happened, but it just – Google Voice failed completely. Yeah, Google Voice does not like loud noises. Google Noise is like your fucking persnickety neighbor. So if you call, you have to speak in a level tone, I think. Yeah, it's a pretty shitty free voicemail. I mean it's not a super shitty free voicemail system because it does a good job of being able to get us voicemails.

But you've got to be sure not to yell or be too loud because sometimes you'll blow it out and it won't capture it. We got an email from Dumbass, actually, who called in to leave part of his bit, and part of his bit actually got cut out. There's a part where he's talking about Jesus spewing on some dude and curing him of leprosy, and it doesn't really come through.

And he sent us an email like, oh, shit, you should have told me. It was like, well, you know, if you're going to record something like that, send it to us as an MP3. So we're sorry we can't play your voicemails, but I don't want to subject people's ears to that. It just doesn't sound like anything. You can't really understand it. Yeah. We got an email from Adam, and Adam says in his podcast viewer, it's kind of difficult to read all the sentences that they run together.

I put them in as bullet points in the notes, and that probably publishes weird. I do it for expediency's sake, and I suspect that another enter mark, like another line break there there is not going to change much. I'll try to do it for this episode for one or two of the lines but I'm really not going to spend a lot of time troubleshooting this. It's not a I can't

when I put the show together, I spend a lot of time mixing it and by the time I'm done mixing it, I am so ready to get it just fucking off of my computer that all I do is just copy and paste the notes. I don't even bother really even spell checking them. I just throw them up there.

So I'll see what I can do, but I'm not going to promise anything. It takes them like three hours to cut all my belching and farting anyway. Three hours? That's a fucking quick podcast. You send me like five hours of tape, but you just belch it. And that's not even when we're recording the show.

So we got an email from from Matt, Tom, talking about Christmas and Santa. You know, a lot of people have brought up similar issues with with me knowing that I'm I'm an atheist. And, you know, well, do you do Santa Claus? You know, we actually do do Santa Claus at our house. Um, I think Santa, you do not do Santa Claus. I do Santa Claus. Cecil is the Santa Claus. He comes over on Christmas. I, my, my little boy is a five turning six real soon here. Um, and he loves it. He, he gets a kick out of it. I'm not the biggest Santa Claus fan in the world. My wife really has good memories of Santa and the whole, you know, shenanigans. But I would also say I think Santa Claus is good atheism and critical thinking training, right?

Because you spend years being told bullshit and magic is real, and then you find out that it's not, that it has a much more plausible explanation as to how all those toys got under the Christmas tree. And that is my debit card. We got an email. Oh, my God. We got an email from someone who needs to buy a Val in their name. That's all I'm saying. The name is spelled C-S-A-B-A.

I'm going to say Saba. I have no idea. Maybe the C is like a hard C, so it's Casaba. I don't know. That sounds like, I don't know. Isn't that head, isn't Casaba your head in Spanish? Cabeza. Cabeza.

Cabeza, there it is. Yeah, it's not Casaba. But Spanish is not helping anyway because this person is from Hungary. They are from Hungary, it turns out. Although they could totally be punking us. This is something I just realized. Like somebody says, oh, I'm from China. It's like, yeah, they're probably, you know, they could be from fucking New Jersey.

How would we know? So if you're from a place that's far away, take a picture of you by a monument there. Yeah. At least that's even, that's closer, at least a little better, even though you could have taken that picture when you visited there six years ago or whatever. I kind of hope to see a bunch of pictures with like shitty postcard backdrops. Yeah. Like really just like awful, like I'm from the moon.

That would be awesome. Those would be the best postcards ever. I'm from Mars. That's great. Hello, this is me and my friend Curiosity. But I want to say, we want to say hello to Saba or Ksaba

or Ksaba. It's probably pronounced like Chaba. The C and S probably make a totally different consonant sound. It's probably pronounced Bill. It's like, hey, Bill. But anyway, hello from Hungary. Thank you for listening.

We really appreciate it. If you're from a weird place and can prove it, let us know. Weird place. We think Hungary is weird. Hungary is a weird place. It's a very weird place. Actually, I'm actually planning on going there this year too. We got an email from Stephen, Tom. and the topic is can you believe in science?

And why don't you read Stephen's email? Absolutely. Greetings, Cecil and Tom. My brother and I were having a discussion about beliefs, and I made the statement, I believe in science. Although my brother agreed with the sentiment, he questioned the statement itself. By definition, is science something you can believe in? Would it be more appropriate to say, I believe in the scientific

method, or something else altogether? I was just wondering if you guys had any poorly formed thoughts or opinions on this. Turns out we do. Oh my gosh. Yeah, you know, Tom, the interesting thing here is that without training in certain fields, there is some level of belief, I think, that's necessary in science.

Like, I'm not a geneticist or a genetics person. I don't even know how to pronounce it. I don't even know what the fucking science is called. But I don't know enough about genetics to really – genealogists, I'm a generalist, but I don't know enough about the science to really, truly, you know, 100% be able to prove all the things that they have proven, to look at all the research, all the data, understand everything. But that doesn't stop me from doing it. I can do it.

So unlike religion, which is just you believe this because I tell you it's true and then you believe it, with science, I think there's a piece of it that I might have to take someone else's word for, but that doesn't stop me or anyone else from actually learning the things that are necessary to know whether or not it's a true statement or a fact. Well, I think you hit the differentiation there is the verifiable, not the verified, right? So that's the distinction.

I haven't verified all of the information from the entire science back catalog of information, right? Nobody has. It's a ridiculous idea. But it is verifiable. So it's the process. I think what's important about science to understand and the reason that I don't think you can believe in science, the noun. I think you believe in science as a verb. Science is procedural. Science is a process, a method for understanding the noun. I think you believe in science as a verb. Science is procedural. Science

is a process, a method for understanding the world. It's malleable and adaptable, and it so far has proven to be effective. So in that sense, like, do you believe in science? Well, I believe the scientific method is the best way we have to understand the world and to answer most questions, you know, that the world presents to us. But do you believe in science? I don't even know. Science as a noun just kind of doesn't even work for me. We got an email from Kent, and Kent says, I just finished listening to your latest episode with George Hrab.

What I learned was, and this is when we had George on for Monumental, says, if you take a poorly educated man who has no training in science or history or politics, who used factoids from dubious and discredited sources, who ignores contradictory evidence, and who starts from the conclusion that this was meant to be a Christian nation, you get this movie. I think that's a perfect analysis of what monumental was. Yeah, it was also lousy. We got an email from Tony, and Tony's email's quite long.

Tony's talking about some difficulties she's having with her grandmother. Tony, you have our sympathies, because it's difficult to deal with people who are religious, and it's very difficult to deal with people who are religious and in your family. Yeah, absolutely. That just sucks because there's no way to get around dealing with those people sometimes and not acquiescing to their crazy demands without hurting some feelings.

But what can you do? I mean, that's family, right? Yeah, good luck. We do want to talk about another email that Kent sent. Kent had mentioned that he didn't like that we played the rap song that was recorded by Carlos. This was a couple episodes ago. Carlos on his rap song, his joke song that he played or that he made was he said a lot of derogatory things. And one of those things that he said was the word nigger. And he said it not just once, but many, many, many times. And and Kent was upset. He said it is such a

hateful and demeaning term that it should never be used. It robs people of their humanity. I cannot abide by it. He says there is an argument that it is different when used by African-Americans. I reject this notion that blacks can rob each other of their dignity should not be an excuse. I do not know whether the person that recorded this song was black or not. And it doesn't matter. It is an ugly, ugly term. I agree that it is an ugly term.

But I do think, and we talked, I did send you a message back. I think Tom and I both agree. First, we did think about that segment before we played it because we don't want to come off as somebody who we think is being racist or misogynist or anything. And that song, if you just heard it outside of the context of the show, you might get the idea that we were racists or misogynists. Because there's a part of it that's like, get your dick sucked while you listen to this shit or something. It's like, really? Really? Where's my bitches at, I think?

Yeah, where's my bitches at? It's just crazy. It's insanity. But I think it's being ironic more than anything else. It's trying to be sarcastic and be funny and make fun of the show. We did not think that it was meant to hurt people. And we do think context really does mean a lot when you're using certain terms. Yeah, I agree.

You know, language is all context. I mean, it really, really is. You know, in the States, the word cunt is a really harsh, objectionable word. In other places, it's used casually. Yeah. It's context, right? Context determines how a word works in a sentence. A context determines everything about a word's meaning.

I mean, words definitionally don't, I mean, they usually don't have one definition. They have multiple definitions because the context of that word is appropriately used and it redefines that word based on its context. And I, you know, we certainly weren't trying to offend anybody when we played Carlos's song. We thought it was silly and goofy and ridiculous. And I think that's the spirit in which it was delivered to us and created. And, you know, if somebody finds it offensive, what can you do? You know, we thought it was silly. And that's it. We want to thank

Chuck from Irreligiosophy. And you can find Chuck and his podcast at irreligiosophy.com. Chuck said that the way to find him is to spell it. I'm telling you, all you got to do is go to Google and start typing Irreligiosophy, and it doesn't matter how it's spelled. They figure that shit out, and they tell you. So find Chuck on the web. We will put a link on this show to Chuck's website, Irreligiosophy.com. Chuck's podcast, if you've never heard it, chances are you have, but if you've never heard it, it's a fun, funny podcast. It's very informative. They did a lot of great research on that show, and they really did cover a lot of bases. So go back and check out some of the other stuff and watch for his new stuff that's coming soon. So that wraps it up for another episode of Cognitive Dissonance. Be sure to join us next week. But in the meantime, we will leave you with the Skeptic's Creed. Credulity is not a virtue. It's fortune cookie cutter, mommy issue, hypno-Babylon bullshit. Couched in scientician, double bubble, toil and trouble, pseudo-quasi

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Doubt even this. The opinions and views expressed in this show are that of the hosts only. Our poorly formed and expressed notions do not represent those of our wives, employers, friends, families, or of the local dairy council. you