Cognitive Dissonance - Episode 841: RFK vs Chemtrails

Episode Date: May 12, 2025

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Download the BetMGM Ontario app today! You don't want to miss out! Visit betmgm.com for terms and conditions. 19 plus to wager, Ontario only, please gamble responsibly. If you have questions or concerns about your gambling or someone close to you, please contact Connex Ontario at 1-866-531-2600 to speak to an advisor free of charge. Bet MGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with iGaming Ontario. This episode of Cognitive Dissonance is brought to you by our patrons. You fucking rock. Rock. Be advised that this show is not for children, the faint of heart, or the easily Recording live from Glory Hole Studios in Chicago and beyond, this is Cognitive Dissonance. Every episode we blast anyone who gets in our way. We bring critical

thinking, skepticism, and irreverence to any topic that makes the news, makes it big, or makes us mad. It's skeptical. It's political. And there is no welcome mat. Today is Thursday, May the 8th. Cecil, how's your week been buddy? It's been great. How's your week been? It's been the best. Jesus Christ, Tub. Alright, so I gotta tell you guys, my voice might sound weird, I might be grunting and groaning, I apologize. I hurt my neck pretty good. I gotta get some surgery on the old thing, cause I'm old and I'm shitty. And I made the mistake of falling asleep, and now I need surgery from it. It's dangerous. Because I'm shitty and I made the mistake of falling asleep and now I need surgery from it

It's dangerous 47 years old at this age you do not just fall asleep Willy-nilly just I fell asleep and now I need a cervical fusion You know what you need to do from now on you need to get a spotter when you're asleep Fucking real man. You know it's so fucking stupid. I was laughing. I was like, you know, now, so I did hurt my neck pretty bad. I gotta get a, just literally by waking up and being old. And I do have to get a cervical fusion it looks like. So I am grunting and groaning a little bit,

but what kills me is like, it's not like I crashed my bike. No. You know, it's not like I like pushed too much in the fucking weight room or anything. I literally just woke up like this. Yeah What the fuck man? What the fuck we've been doing this now for almost 20 years and I feel like I went from like a

Certain kind of man to a different kind of man I feel for you. It's got to be a lot of pain you're going through It's awesome. So yeah apologies guys if the next two records my voice sounds a little funny or I miss any good jokes I'm fucking very distracted Oh, you know what else is fucking nuts man, so I've got this is just like a weird crazy aside So have you seen the the the stuff going on in India and Pakistan right now? Yeah, I'm gonna trading blows over Kashmir and all that crazy like high tension God, I hope we have good fucking diplomats. Oh wait. No, we don't

like let's Two fucking nuclear armed nations fucking going toe-to-toe. I got a bunch of staff Right now. Oh, no, so I got a bunch of staff right now. Oh no. So I have a bunch of staff in India, just in general that work for me. And then I've got a bunch of my local staff right now on an annual training trip over there. And so I get a message, like I see the news

and I was like, oh shit. And then like I pretty much immediately get a message from my guy. And he's like, hey, would it be okay if we change our plane tickets or whatever to come home? If we, and I'm like, yes! What do you mean would it be okay if we change our plane tickets or whatever to come home if we and I'm like, yes, what do you mean? Would it be okay if you don't want to get caught in potentially a war zone?

Yeah, like 100% I was like, I don't care what that costs. We'll sign off on it, man. Like get home if you want to get home. And he's like, nah, I think we're far enough away, but I just want to check if you guys will cover the expense. And I'm like, cover the expense. Fucking A. Yeah, I'm covering the expense. And I'm like, cover the expense! Fucking A. Yeah, I'm covering the expense.

Jesus fuck, man. This is the time, though, to have somebody in there who can, like, send a person over, you know, your secretary of state or your vice president, so smooth things over in another land and they can talk to these two sides and maybe make two ends meet. Nah, I mean, can you imagine Marco Rubio going over there and having a conversation with somebody? JD Vance, they'll wind up dead. They'll wind up dead, like he killed the boat.

Don't tempt me. I mean, that sounds great. I'm not gonna lie. Maybe we should send them over there. I don't even care if they broker a peace deal. I just like the outcome that you're positive. I mean, there used to be like a time when America had some moral high ground internationally

and was able to broker peace deals because we operated from a place of international respect. And that's completely gone now. It's completely gone. And everybody sees us for what we are, which is a nation of craven imbeciles acting entirely transactionally. So nobody is gonna take us seriously.

And nobody is gonna wanna let us be the middle man. They won't even let you in the room. Why would they bother? They'd be like, what are you gonna offer? But at least the stakes are devastatingly high. At least they're really high. That's key. So that's good.

This ain't deal or no deal, and I'm not Howie fucking Mandel. It's really hard for me to think right now because you have me tied up. It's not a normal situation that people think really well in, just so you know. To stories from the New Republic, Trump accidentally admits he hasn't made any trade deals.

Donald Trump has continuously insisted that deals over his tariffs are coming. Except for oopsie doodle Cecil, he's not made any trade deals. There was an announcement actually today that he may have reached, they may have reached a deal with Britain, but the details are essentially negligible. They're not releasing any significant amount of details on those trade deals. Here's what he said, I wanna read part of this. President Donald Trump claimed Tuesday

that the US doesn't have to sign any trade deals, inadvertently admitting that his administration hasn't made any progress during the 90-day pause on the disastrous tariffs. Everyone says, when, when, when are you going to sign deals? We don't have to sign deals. Trump said we don't have to sign deals. They have to sign deals with us.

They want a piece of our market. We don't want a piece of their market. We don't care about their market. They want a piece of our market. Dude, that is the most incomprehensible gibberish nonsense. That's one. That's not how a deal works. Yeah. Like imagine any other deal. See,, that's not how a deal works. Yeah.

Like imagine any other deal. See, so let's imagine you want to buy a car. You both want something in that fucking transaction. Yeah. Right? That's how a deal works. You never have a deal where you don't want to be a part of that deal.

That's called breaking up. That's, you know? Yeah, that's called I need space. Yes! You know, that's, it's not you, it's me breaking up. You know? Yeah, that's called I need space. Yes, you know, that's it's not you, it's me. Yeah. Well, as a deal, you want something still. If you literally don't want anything out of something, you're not making a fucking deal.

You're just like, you don't have anything on your side of the fucking bargaining table. It'd be like, if I went to buy a car and I was like, all right, you've got a fucking, you know, beautiful fucking Nissan GTR I'd like to get, and I have a bag of rotten jelly beans, the fucking sales guy would be like, all right, you've got a fucking beautiful fucking Nissan GTR I'd like to get, and I have a bag of rotten jelly beans. The fucking sales guy would be like, you don't have anything.

And I can't say, well, two bags of rotten jelly beans. It's nothing, that's nothing. That's nothing. Like it's like trying to negotiate, how much for your mother's ashes? People would be like, what are you talking about? I'm not selling those. That's not a deal.

You're not making a deal, man. Well, and then the thing is, is that even if Trump does win, get a win, and I'm using air quotes here when I say win, if we presume that Trump gets a win with the UK, he's still got a giant fucking L with Canada. He's still got a giant L L all the people across the globe. And we're seeing, you know, people that aren't willing to come to the United

States anymore for tourism. We're seeing the downstream effects. Even if he does get a trade deal with Canada, we might still see downstream effects where they decide they're not going to make a deal with us anymore to come down. So you've, you've prioritized one sort of deal for a myriad of other deals underneath that might fall through and be bad for us. And you've done this over and over and over again because of your hubris. He doesn't care about whether

or not we get a good deal or not. He just wants to show the world that he's in charge. That's all that Trump cares about. He doesn't care about any of this other stuff. He doesn't care about whether or not we're getting a good or a bad deal. He just wants people to think that he's the biggest guy on the block. That's all he's ever wanted. The thing is like from his own admission, from the admission of everybody that they talked to about this stuff, all the real juice that we would want to squeeze would be in a deal with China. Yeah. Getting a fucking deal with, look around your house,

look at all the products you see made in Great Britain. Oh, I'm sorry, there's literally none of them. None of them. There's nothing, like maybe some tea. You might have some tea in your house. They're talking about how they might wanna do some TV and film and stuff like that. That might be something that he's not gonna tariff

or whatever. Sure. I mean, I'm being an ass a little bit, but you know what I mean like the ball is not a lot Right the juice the juice we're trying to squeeze is is China, right? That's the juice that that Trump admittedly is trying to squeeze here like and also making a deal with Britain That's like fucking making a deal on easy mode, man We've had a special relationship with Britain for fucking ever. Like for like 200 years, we've had a very special fucking relationship.

When we prosecuted our unjust and illegal war on false premises in Iraq, the first nation to say like, yeah, we'll also do that was Tony Blair. We'll do war crimes too. Yeah, we'll also slaughter civilians that had nothing to do with anything, said Tony Blair and his friends in Britain. Like they've always, that's the easy mode shit. That's seriously easy mode shit. So like that's not something like you hit a home fucking run, man.

Yeah. Next chance comes up girl remind me to veto something French because I'd be damn glad to. Oh, this is great news. This is from the advocate, Arizona governor Katie Hobbs vetoes anti-trans bills and tells lawmakers to focus on real issues that matter. Now, I love this because of the way she frames it. She frames it in exactly that way. She said, today I vetoed house bill 2438. This bill will not lower costs, will not increase opportunity and will not enhance security

or freedom for Arizona. I encourage the legislature to focus on real issues that matter and impact people's everyday lives." And I think that's exactly the way this shit needs to be framed, Cecil. Yeah. Yeah. I thought it was great too. She, she comes right out and says, look, don't, I'm not going to, I'm not going to put this thing through that you want. You guys are all up in arms about all this like trans rights. And this one very specifically was like trying to take away people's rights because they were, if they identify differently,

they weren't gonna have it on their identification. And she was like, no, absolutely not. I'm not doing that. Are you kidding me? Get out of here. I'm not doing that. And we gotta see more people do this. Just stand up to these people and be like, no, I'm just gonna veto it. You can't doing that. Are you kidding me? Get out of here. I'm not doing that. And we got to see more people do this. Just stand up to these people and be like, no, I'm just going to veto it. You can't do that. Go make a law that people care about. Instead, what we're seeing is these culture war things that everybody wants to constantly

make these rules because for them, that's a win for the far right because the far right wants to for the for the far right because the far right wants to Show their base that they are inflicting Damage on the other side. That's what they've been trying to talk about for that's what they've been That's what they've been running on for a long time and every chance they get that that they can in some way Make the other side angry and make the other side upset because they're stripping rights away, the far right is very happy with that. They're excited when that happens. And that resonates with their base.

It resonates with the deep sort of far right base that is all of Twitter and most of these, in fact, all the hard right MAGA people, it's all that base and they're excited when that happens. So they know that this is really important for their base. But for the average person, nobody cares about it but that base. And so it's great that they're like,

no, we're just gonna not allow that. And then now you can go and make something that people all care about and we can move on with our lives and It's perfect to have somebody in charge there that can just throw that pen around and say nah, we're doing something else today Would you say Cecil and it's all about that base? Absolutely, this is also like it's important to note that all of this stuff is intentional. It's an intentional distraction from their lack of solutions to real problems. Yes.

Right? They don't have a solution for you for inflation. They don't have a solution for you for high housing costs. They don't have a solution for you for the skyrocketing cost of higher education. They don't have a solution for you for any of the things that matter in your life. They don't have a solution. They've not even proposed concepts of a plan for solutions for how you're gonna pay

for medicine and medical care. They don't have any ideas for that stuff. This is just a distraction. If they can get you worked up about people that you fucking don't know, that you've probably never met, that don't impact your day-to-day Life, but you can get real fucking worked up about high school track or whatever fucking, you know Some shit you didn't care about Tuesday, but now you're gonna pretend you do on Thursday

They get you all worked up on that shit They distract you from the fact that they've not figured out anything that matters to you They've not improved your quality of life. There's no childcare, like, income tax credits. Like, there's none of that. Like, there's nothing that would impact your life and make your life better. There's just this stuff for you to get mad about. Get mad. It's fucking, it's the fucking five-minute hate. That's what this shit is, right? Get your fucking hate on, and you'll think you've always been at war with Eurasia.

Well, and those people that are going to be, you know, because they're going to be seeing hard times too. I mean, it's not like Trump can selectively make certain people see hard times. Tons of people across the country are going to see hard times. Those people will endure those hard times as long as you're being hurt more. And this is a great way to show like, like, no, that's not going to happen. And we're all just going to have to sort of buck up and try to figure our way out of this.

Come on. What kind of chicken shit crap is this? Yeah, come on, man. We're here. What are we waiting for? So this story comes from illinoidtimes.com. Homeland security, Christine Noem, a no show at the governor's mansion held press conference instead near the site of Emma Schafer's murder.

On Thursday afternoon, the Department of Homeland Security announced Christy Noam would be visiting Springfield that following morning to tout her making America safe again agenda and speak out against Governor Pritzker's immigration policies and Illinois' status as a sanctuary state did not give a time or location for that press conference. Everybody thought it was going to be at the mansion at 10 a.m. She fucking chickened out of that shit. Just like all these Republicans, Cecil, are chickening out and they're not showing up and they're not being present and they're not being in places where their constituency will hold their feet to the fire and ask them real questions. Well, what I love is that she had been sort of going from state to state, and they do this thing where they'll stand in front of the governor's mansion

or whatever, and it gives it the illusion that they are actually in league with the governor, right? If they're standing in front of the governor's mansion, then the governor sort of is, in some ways, giving his blessing to the things that they're doing. So they were coming to the state, they were gonna say something, the governor sort of is in some ways giving his blessing to the things that they're doing. So they were coming to the state, they were going to say something, the governor got wind that they were going to come to the state. So he decided you're not going to use my bet my mansion as a backdrop. And he put up giant posters that said due process for all in front of his mansion in two

different places. And so they probably had a scout who drove by and was like, hey, why don't we just use Four Seasons Total Landscaping instead? They decided to go somewhere else, and they went somewhere else. And they went and they did their little speech to show like exactly, and here's the thing, like all you're doing is just like an on location speech. Don't you have better things to do?

Isn't there anything more pressing on your calendar than traveling around the country and just standing in places where someone was hurt or injured or in front of a governor's mansion and just saying like, hey, we need to do this stuff. Who cares? Like go do your job. Instead they're like out there,

they're out there what they're doing. And again, this leans back to the other story. They're doing it because they know it makes other people mad. They're doing it because they're doing. And again, this leans back to the other story. They're doing it because they know it makes other people mad. They're doing it because they wanna make people upset. They want people to be mad. They want people to be afraid. They want people to emote.

They want this from all these, from everybody who's watching, anybody who's not on their side, they wanna either instill fear or make them upset. And they're doing the best that they can. And that's why he picked her. He didn't pick her cause she's effective. He picked her because he knew she was going to go out there and troll every day.

Yeah. And I want to read what, what governor Pritzker who I am, we've talked about Pritzker before I fucking like Pritzker. And I think there's a, there, you know, there's some noise that he might be running in 2028, right? And I would say I would give up our governor for that. Now, hopefully we don't get another fucking license plate maker for our next governor

because we've had too many of those. But here's what, no, this is actually Alex Janulius. I'm sorry, Illinois secretary of state, Alexi Janulius. Here's what Alexi Janulius said. The combination of cowardice, incompetence and cruelty is a very scary mix, so while I'm glad she's not here, we need to step up as a society and as a country

and as a democracy to monsters like Kristi Noem. That's amazing. That's fucking great. Everywhere she goes to, people should bring stuffed dogs. I think, I seriously think everywhere she goes, everybody should just bring stuffed dogs with fucking red paint on them Just everywhere just fucking humiliate her everywhere. She goes just constantly she should never Fucking Applebee's she would show up. She'd be like, oh target practice. Yeah

I've got a degree in homeopathic medicine. You've got a degree in baloney. This story is fucking nuts. This is from Snopes. Oklahoma will teach high school students debunked 2020 election fraud theories as fact. The new academic standards promote US President Donald Trump and his allies, groundless 2020 election conspiracy theories. They checked this shit. Let me go ahead and read from the article.

Next school year, thousands of high school students in Oklahoma will be required to learn about Trump's debunked claims that the 2020 election was tainted by fraud. The lesson will not be part of a course on conspiracy theories, but will instead be an official component of the new social studies curriculum. That's fucking real. That's crazy. That's fucking real. They are gonna be required in their social studies standards to talk about examples of discrepancies

in the 2020 election, all of which have been debunked, none of which are based in evidence. This is absolutely fucking nuts, Cecil. Why, you know, why is it that Oklahoma is sort of the litmus test and the place in the United States where all these bad things originate? I mean, I guess I already answered my own question, it's Oklahoma. It's Oklahoma. But really, genuinely, when you think about like, they were buying the Trump Bibles and they wanted to put those in there.

They have been in many ways in the news constantly when it comes to separation of church and state, when it comes to curriculum for students. And this is no different. This is another moment. They must really have just like the genuinely worst curriculum for these students. You're talking about kids going to school and learning something that's objectively false, right? They're saying we need to teach kids

that this objectively false thing happened in their classrooms. And I know they've been doing this for years because they tried to do this with intelligent design years ago, right? So all across the nation, they tried to do this with intelligent design years ago, right? So all across the nation, they tried to do this. But really, this is the culmination of, I really do think it comes, it sort of spawns from that, right? It's like, we allowed some falsehoods to make their way in and now the door is open and just other stuff can just pour in. And this is

another perfect example of that. This is absolutely untrue things that are provably false that we are just gonna let the students there learn as fact. Well, you know, I mean, Cecil, there might be a book, I'm trying to remember the name of it, The Grand Unified Theory of Bullshit, it might be. Who wrote that? I believe you and I did. I believe, wait, you've got a copy?

Look at that. You've got a copy? Where can you buy a copy of that, Cecil? I could get it on Amazon did. I believe, wait, you've got a copy? Look at that. You've got a copy? Where can you buy a copy of that, Cecil? I could get it on Amazon, which I hate, by the way, because that's the only place we can get it. It's true. But you know, if you wanted to avoid Amazon and hear that book read to you, poor Chas.

Yeah, that's true. You can buy it on our website. Yeah, you could. Yeah, it's just this pod. You make a point that we've made a thousand times. The danger of all of this stuff is always like, you know, the dare guys lied to us, right? So like when the fucking dare guys showed up at your school

and they're like, yeah, if you fucking eat Pez or whatever, that's a gateway drug to heroin. And if you fucking try one marijuana's, you're gonna be a heroin addict like three hours later. That's nonsense. But I will tell you what is not nonsense. Bullshit is additive. Bullshit is a gateway, right?

If you allow for a worldview that does not require a stringency for evidence, then the next thing that doesn't have strict evidence, why is that excluded? The next thing that doesn't have strict evidence, why is that excluded? That is a real gateway. That is that excluded? The next thing that doesn't have a strict evidence. Why is that excluded? That is a real gateway. That is a real problem.

That is genuine. Like these things are all linked. You can't tell me that you believe in fucking Bigfoot, but you are otherwise a person who requires the scientific method for all of your other. Yeah, right. You can't tell me that. There's no, so like they're all, they're

all the same, right? To a degree they're all the same. And what's more complicated, Bigfoot or climate change, right? What's more complicated, you know, and then once you start getting into conspiracies of people, why wouldn't you think if you think JFK wasn't assassinated by Lee Harvey Oswald and said it was some sort of deep conspiracy, or if you think there's some sort of deep conspiracy around Jeffrey Epstein and his death and all this other stuff, where you think there's deep conspiracies around how we got to the moon, et cetera, why wouldn't you think that

this is also a conspiracy to keep Donald Trump out of, out of office through, you know, using levers of government that he was in control of somehow to remove him from office. Yeah. This is like, once you open this door for these kids too, like what have we done in terms of like eroding their faith in the educational system? You know, like there's, know, like there's a hundred horrible things that this does. And it really tells you how ideologically,

they always wanna talk on the right about how, you know, the educational systems, you know, colleges, all this stuff. Oh, these are, you know, ideological, you know, factories that churn out liberals and all of this. Indoctrination. Look at what they're doing. Yeah.

Look at what they're working on. They're working on building into the textbooks like as standards for the curriculum lies. Just straight up lies. We're not talking about like, hey, if you wanna take an elective in fucking gender equality or something, you can. Like this is high school.

They're hitting them younger, they're hitting them with standards and curriculums. That's different too. That's way different. Like they love to talk about colleges and they love specifically to talk about Ivy League colleges. Knowing that most people don't go to college. Doesn't matter as much.

Almost everybody goes to high school. They've got the better edge of the wedge, right? If you wanna like, but like we don't wanna do that on our side because like we just wanna teach true things. Like that's all I wanna teach kids is just true shit. That's it. Yeah, and if you're gonna just inject a bunch of lies in different places, it's easy to go find those places

to inject lies. And they find them, they find those places in the places high school for these young kids to try to learn, you know, you're just going to school and now they're like, Oh, and you know, as government, you're going to learn that our government doesn't know how to run an election. Now, what's that going to do for them later on when they want to vote? If they don't want to vote, are they going to stay at home?

Why bother? Right? Yeah. Is it going to change how they view our elections in the future? Is this a long-term play to reduce youth vote? I Don't know maybe I mean could be it's not not yeah Sure this guy's gonna hurt us one no, Donnie these men are cowards Okay, so we take some money you have on you we call Sateve

Fuck you this next story comes from mother Jones Okay, so we take some money you have won, we call it a deal. Fuck you. This next story comes from Mother Jones. Meet the 64 year old social worker who was booted from a Republican town hall. There is video of this that I watched as I'm blue sky. Her offense was asking representative Mike Lawler, Republican from New York, what it would take for him to stand up to Trump.

And that's pretty much all she did. He didn't answer the question. He started instead talking about appropriations bills and other stupid bullshit. He just like, just refused to answer the question and she called him out on it. She wouldn't let it go. And they sent over the fucking state troopers and they literally dragged this 64 year old lady.

They picked her up and bodily carried her from the town hall. You've got to think, you've got to think if you're standing up there on that stage, Cecil, God, I'm full of shit. Yeah. God, I'm the bad guy here. How are you not like, oh, I think I'm the bad guy. Yeah. I feel like I'm the bad guy. Yeah. I feel like I'm the bad guy.

Yeah. I don't know. I mean, I wonder what is going through their head. I will say this. If they're throwing the reason why they're throwing people out all the time and they're, they're chucking these people out into the, you know, they're, they're basically, they're too cowardly to even run a town hall and when they do, they make sure that they silence the people that they don't want.

This shows you everything you needed to know as to why Trump is still doing all the things he's doing and will not have any pushback. Is because what Trump's America ushered in was a group of absolute cowards, right? Think about this person who can't even look a person in the face, who they are representing, and say, this is what I'm doing, I don't feel...

Like, even if you don't think you should be standing up to Trump, just say, I don't think I should stand up to Trump. I think I should be following what he does. I agree with him. What is so hard about saying that, right? If you believe the things you're saying, why try to silence this person? Why not just answer the question?

If you think she says, hey, why didn't you stand up to Trump? And then you respond with, I am 100% in Trump's camp. Why would I stand up to Trump? Next question. How hard is that? Instead, it's get her out of here. Get her out of here. I cannot even look at her.

That's what Trump wanted was all these feckless cowards that were gonna be part of this administration who would never stand up to him and would fall in line in every moment. That's what he has in Mike Johnson as the Speaker of the House. That's what he has for all the rest of these people who are hard mag on his side.

Once in a while, you'll run into somebody who's not, but most of them, they're all just cowards. They're all just, and he got exactly what he wanted. He got a cowardly party that follows him around and votes exactly how he wants and won't take questions and runs away from town halls. And I think, Cecil, the reason that they don't just say, well, yeah, I'm fucking pro-Trump. Like, whatever he says is great.

Like fucking slam my fucking uvula with your fucking dick or whatever you say. I think the reason they don't do that is they also recognize, I think, that there is a possibility that Trump blows up their careers. So I think they're trying to have their cake and eat it too. I think they're trying to like punt and spin and dodge and not answer questions. Don't get on Trump's bad side, but don't say enough stuff so where later, you can plausibly say,

well, I never really agreed with that. I think they're trying to create, they're trying to both support and have distance at the same time. Because these guys, and make this very clear, they are more concerned with keeping their jobs in Congress than they are about helping you. That's what they care about.

Sure. They care about their job. They care about waking up and having their job in Congress much more than they care about helping you. That's what they care about. Sure. They care about their job. They care about waking up and having their job in Congress much more than they care about accomplishing anything for their constituency. So their number one goal is not anything to do with the people. Their number one goal is re-election.

Yeah. That's it. If you didn't believe that, you'd say like, there'd be plenty of people who'd work one term. Yeah. There'd be plenty of people who'd just be like, yeah, you know what, I wanna do this because I want to make a difference, but I'm going to move on to another part of my career. This lady though, she's a, she's a civil rights person.

So she like does dead weight. She was like, yeah, she's like, I'm just going to dead weight. And so she just dead weighted and she had, she made those fuckers four dudes carrier. You gotta love it. She fucking immediately just slumped. She's like, yeah, yeah. She powered down like fucking Mitch McConnell.

In the name of people and freedom and democracy, stuff like that, I hear about kidnapping myself and I'm taking the ship with me. Come on. Beaver Rocks, universally considered to be the dimmest star in several solar systems. All right. This story is from Slate.

The real lesson of a Republican judge's just failed attempt to steal an election. So this is a, uh, it's a fairly big deal. It's like recently updated. This is the, uh, North Carolina Supreme court seat. Yeah. So the North Carolina Supreme Court seat. Yeah. So the North Carolina Supreme Court seat was being challenged, challenged hard, challenged illegitimately by the Republican, of course,

who did not want to concede, did not want to allow for that free and fair election to have its actual inevitable numerically tallied results take place. And this was really like one of those, if you were watching this, this was one of those moments where you're like, this could go the wrong way. This could go the wrong way and it could spell disaster for how we elect all kinds of officials at many levels

across this country. Yeah, and it went to appeals and I think that the final judgment was really scathing that basically said, stop fucking around, this is over. We're not doing this anymore. And they made that person concede and they finally conceded. But for months there was article after article

after article coming out about this very case saying that they are trying to literally steal the election. That this is like, this is not just, this is not just hyperbole. This isn't some speculation. This is someone who is not willing to concede. And they are saying that they, that they won and they are literally trying to steal the election. And it, we just, it, it, it kept getting kicked up the, the can kept getting

kicked up the hill and each kept getting kicked up the hill and each judge was pushing it up. And then it finally wound up with somebody who was like, man, just fucking stop. That's enough, stop it. Cause you know, you're talking about months of someone not actually being in that seat because they've essentially hijacked it.

Well, and like one of the terms that was used in this article, I wanted to seize on because I think it's an important term or a phrase, and that is destabilizing democracy. Yeah. There is a project on the right, an intentional project to destabilize democracy, to make democracy itself. This is super important to make democracy itself less valued by everyday people, structurally more difficult for courts

and other systems to uphold, to damage the institutions that perpetuate democracy. This is a power grab that not only seats the Republicans in power, but this is a power grab that destabilizes and threatens the very way that we decide on our form of government, that we decide on our leadership, that we choose who's in charge.

Once you lose that, you lose all of your power as a constituency. You lose no power as a constituency if you lose your democracy. What are you voting for anymore? What are you gonna petition your Congress people for? What are you gonna, what power do you have to throw somebody out of office?

Throw that bum out. It's gone. Yeah. The project of destabilization is an ongoing and intentional process that they are going through right now. Come on now. Not tonight, we're wearing our suits.

No secrets here, remember? No secrets between sailors. This story is in interesting articles from MSN, it's a port over from Newsweek. Catholic Church to excommunicate priests for following new US state law. This is a law passed in Washington state, and that law says, hey, you know,

if you're a priest and somebody says, I fuck kids, you gotta report that to the cops. and somebody says, I fuck kids, you got to report that to the cops. And instead of the Catholic church saying, yeah, actually, you know what? That makes a lot of sense. We don't want that. Yeah. Yeah.

What? Yeah. In fact, get out of our way. We want to call them first. We're going to install a fucking bat phone to commissioner Gordon in every fucking confessional because fuck what instead of like, if you, if you do that, they told their priest, if you do that, you're excommunicated, which is the biggest thing the church can do

as a priest, right? Yeah, yeah. So they basically, they're setting up a system that allows for people not to tell on someone else when they victimize a child, which is something that they've done for years and years and years and years. They've set up a code of secrecy. This group of people who move priests around, who have been

sexually abusing children for decades and decades, and then they get moved to another place and they do the same thing. You have an organization that does not care about the rule of law. They don't care about, they don't care about, they think they're above the law. You tell a priest something they think that's above the law. That's not how this works. You know, you're protecting someone who has done something wrong. That's not a good thing. That's that that whole confessional thing is bullshit. Like, fuck that. Like there shouldn't be some sort of protection because you told somebody.

Well, like think about it in any other context, right? In any other context, if a teacher, right? There's a whole slew of people that we've decided in our culture are important, powerful protectors of people, protectors of society, protectors of children. We call them mandated reporters. Yeah. Right?

And if I, as a mandated reporter, find out that somebody is fucking a kid, or abusing a kid, not only can I report that, I am required by law to report that. I have to do it. If I don't do it, there are consequences for me. Because of course there should. I get to operate in society as a person,

and I've asked for this privilege, to operate in society as a person of trust. And a priest or a confessor is the same fucking thing. You are walking around, we are giving you tax breaks, we're letting you build your stupid fucking buildings everywhere, we're letting you have all this stuff. And it is no excuse that you believe hard enough in an imaginary monster or friend or whatever, that your fucking imagination is so strong that you don't have to protect kids

from abuse. Everybody else that gets that same position of authority and trust in our society becomes a mandated reporter. A doctor, a nurse, a teacher, a social worker. People who are in positions of power, trust, and authority almost always become mandated reporters. And if they're not, you have a moral obligation. Or oftentimes you have a corporate obligation, right? Like we have obligations to do the right thing,

to stop abuse, to stop that shit from occurring. It tells you everything you need to know about the priorities of the pedophile Catholic church. Yeah, you're absolutely right. They, did you see that they got a new pope? I did as an American from Chicago. Chicago, yeah, they got a Chicago Pope. But you know, like, unless that guy hits the ground running by saying, we're so sorry for

all the harms we've caused. We will make good on all those promises that we made to people and settle lawsuits, et cetera, et cetera. We won't go out of our way to create these and back and lobby for these other laws that make it so that the statute of limitations runs out faster. We're gonna get rid of and excommunicate all the priests that have done wrong in the past.

We're gonna get rid of them. They will no longer have the protection of the church. We're gonna remove them completely. Unless he starts doing things like that, then fuck this guy who cares right? 100% who gives a shit this guy is you know This is a this is an organization that people have let run rampant They've let him run rampant and you know there might be some possibility

I know if you saw this, but I guess like he's sort of he or people in his circle have sort of shunned JD Vance in the past and like He or people in his circle have sort of shunned JD Vance in the past and like said some stuff about Trump being anti-Trump. And it's like, I recognize and realize why the Catholic Church might have chosen this person very specifically from the United States, who seems very anti-Trump in this moment. It makes sense that someone might do something like that. But at the same time, I see it and I think unless he can do something that can like stop this, stop bad things from happening, he can't. He's not gonna do much. I mean, what is he gonna do?

He's gonna say a bunch of stuff to Catholics and then the Catholics are gonna look to JD Vance and JD Vance is gonna be like, don't listen to him. And then they're not gonna listen to him. Like any Maggot Catholic's not gonna listen to him. Why would they bother? Yep. Well, I mean, think about too,

where the most powerful and most desired base of potential, we talked about this before, potential new convert Catholics is coming from. It's not America. No. So, like, he's not that powerful. He's coming from a, he's coming from like, a customer base that's basically zero, you know,

and shrinking every day. I mean, the customer base here has money, so I don't want to pretend it doesn't have any power, but in terms of like total fucking potential congregants, it's shrinking constantly in America and in Western Europe. So like this new guy, like he would have to be, in order for him to have any moral relevance, any social moral relevance, he would have to be in order for him to have any moral relevance, any social moral relevance,

he would have to be a reformer at such a level that the church would throw him out. I think the church cannot be reformed. I think the church will not allow itself to be reformed. Certainly not in this way. Certainly not when it comes to the protection of children. Yeah. They seem like, the thing is like, and we've talked about this before, but like it's the easiest possible question. Like who are the most vulnerable people that exist? Well, they're obviously kids. They are just naturally, physically,

emotionally, financially, every, all the E's. They're the most vulnerable group of people. So they require the most protections. And so if you are an organization that historically hasn't been able to figure that out or has wrestled with this as if it were complicated or has tried to play some fucking nuance game with the abuse of children, when there's no nuance.

There's nothing even remotely nuanced here to discuss. The discussion is as easy as it would be if you were working in the office. Yep. Yep. That's it. Like, imagine if you had a daycare in the office and you found out fricking like, you know, Jim from accounting was fucking one of the kids in the daycare. You wouldn't be like, well, I mean, we do have to really think about the,

the implications on payroll. Jim is a really, really, the cops. Jim is really good at his job. Yeah. the implications on payroll. No, you get fucking call the cops. Jim is really good at his job. And we don't wanna make sure, you know what we'll do is we'll send Jim to another daycare. Yeah, right.

Well, that's exactly it, man. Well, you know, they don't know down three towns over and we'll tell Jim, hey, stop it. And then we'll, that'll probably work. That'll work. That'll probably work. Yeah. Yeah, and we'll do that literally hundreds of times.

And hey, if some of those kids in the daycare die, we'll bury them in the mass grave outside. As long as they're fucking indigenous or whatever. Right? Jesus, what a horror. I mean, like the number of things the Catholic church has done and like, oh, we'll actually, we'll invent this

like fucking pelvic chainsaw so we can saw women open so that they give birth to more babies. And like, we'll steal babies from like unwed mothers in Italy and ship them across the world when they spend their whole lives looking for their lost children. Like the number of horrible things they've done, you couldn't possibly make them all up.

There's so many of them and they're not all in antiquity. These are relatively recent. It feels like, it feels like the Catholic church is like a big episode of American horror story. Yes. You know, it's like, it's like the Catholic church itself, it all there, all the different horrors that they've put out, that would easily make a season. Yeah, I would at least one season at least one. So yeah, like there's a new pope in town and I'm like, yeah, whatever man,

second verse same as the first. It's all the same fucking dude, nothing's gonna change. And the real pisser is I do believe, and only because you've told me, that there are good people on the ground that care. There are. And I believe that because I believe in you. And I believe like that you are a morally good person

And if you're impressed by these people, I am sort of impressed by proxy but like they don't They don't control the organization. No, they don't set the rules and the tone and the fucking write the big rule lists Many of them are women and that's the problem is the women don't have a voice They do a lot of the work and they do good work, but they don't have a voice when it comes to the real big problems of the Catholic Church. That tells you a lot too, right? Has anyone ever told you to eat a dick?

Oh, God. Oh, you love to see it, Cecil. You love to see it. This story from Alternet. They'll take my house. Far right pastor begs for a million dollars before he ends up on the street. And who, who are we talking about? Tell evangelists, Jim Baker, give me a million dollars so I don't become homeless. Here's Jim Baker telling everybody about his woes of the foreclose. This ministry, they will take my house too. So I will be in the street.

But that won't happen. God's too big for that. But I don't care. I mean, I've never been in the street, but I've never seen the rises forsaken or a seed out begging for bread. That's you. Amen. That's you. Amen.

That's you. What? I don't know. What did that mean? God will stand with you if you stand with him. Amen. That's why it's important that you obey God. I need about a thousand people that will give right now.

Some can maybe not give the thousand up, but you can give a hundred dollars. That's right. I want you to mail it give right now some can maybe not give the thousand up but you can give a hundred dollars That's right. See that I want you to mail it in right now Yeah, what a fucking Beggar how the fuck see so I don't know like if this is just a Poor give me money, but I'm not really poor grift or if he's really poor You know, there's no way to know because he's such a lying piece of shit, like a lying, rapy piece of shit.

I'm gonna go out on a limb here though, Tom, and say I don't care. Yeah, well, here's the thing. I kinda do care. What I hope is that he really is in financial hardship because if he's rich and he's just trying to get richer and it doesn't work, then he suffers no consequences. What I would love to see is I richer and it doesn't work, then he suffers no consequences.

What I would love to see is I would love it, Cecil, if he really was about to lose everything and then does. That would be delicious. You would have to, it's so crazy to me, this guy, he's already been proven a fraud, right? He had to go to jail, he's a fraud. He's a liar. He's an adulterer. Did he rape some lady?

He's very likely had a sexual assault going on there. So there's a lot going on in this guy's past. And then he comes back out of nowhere. And everybody's just like, yeah, man, is that the buckets guy? And they're like, get the buckets guy in here. Let's get the buckets guy back on TV. And that guy comes on TV and he's selling these buckets. And we saw how marked up and how crazy these buckets were.

Those buckets were essentially an offering. Yep. It's like a seed offering. You buy a bucket full of garbage that you're never going to use. And then he gets money because he's inflated the prices beyond anybody's wildest dreams. He's paying pennies on the dollar for what you're going to have to pay for. And he's doing this over and over and over again, and he's grifting constantly. I can't imagine.

How are you losing money? It's all gravy, dude. I don't know, man. How could you possibly be at this point? Unless you're like, I mean, I don't know, like fucking going to the casino or the strip club every weekend and just fucking shooting money out of a money gun. What are you doing? It's all grift, dude. You were selling fucking shitty cheap coins with like jumps face on them or

whatever. Like it was the total grift. Dude, I know. Here's what I know, dude. I know that Jim Baker's old, right? So here's what I know. Jim Baker's an old fucking guy. He's an old piece of shit. And I would love nothing more than if he lived out

the back end of his measly pathetic days in abject poverty. I hope he does. Like I hope he owes some guy named fucking Vinny who's going to fucking collect on the VIG and break his two stupid fucking stick legs. I would love to see it. I would love to see Jim Baker out on his ass in the street, fucking begging for fucking coins until like he ends up with fucking abscesses and shit all over his face. Nothing bad enough could happen to Jim Baker. I did a citation needed episode a long time ago on Jim Baker.

Like the guy, however bad you think he is, unless you know the full story, he's worse. He's worse than that. He's worse. He's a total piece of shit. I would hate it if he lived out the end of his life in luxury. Fuck that. I hope this is real. I would hate it if he lived out the end of his life in luxury Fuck that I hope this is real. I hope he's I hope he's about to lose it all see so it doesn't feel like it is No, I don't think I think it's I think it's all just a grip It's it's him saying I need it cuz he wants to get as much money as possible And then those people will see him and think oh, he's that's it. It's gonna. It's gonna be all over

I gotta go in and I gotta I gotta give him this money And he wants he wants a thousand people to give him a thousand bucks. Yeah, he does. And the way he phrases it, he's like, oh yeah, God'll do it. You're doing this for God. And it's like, well, give it to you. Like a part of me is like,

I know we're not supposed to blame people who have been victimized by grifters. I know we're not supposed to, but part of me gets angry because it's like, this is so transparent, man! It's so transparent! He's asking you for the money for him! He's even saying it! It's for me! For my ministry, my house! I don't want to live outside! Like, there are people, Cecil, that are going to send that fucking guy money, and they're not going to get their fucking medicine this week. Yeah, they're going to forego something in their life so that they could give

him some of that money. There's somebody who didn't pay the fucking electric bill and is like eating fucking cold beans out of a can because they think Jesus Christ wants to give Jim Baker a blowjob or whatever. You are so dumb. You are really dumb. For real. This story is from Gizmodo. RFK Jr. goes full tinfoil pledges to stop chemtrails in latest Dr. Phil interview. So I guess planes aren't going to fly anymore, Cecil. Oh god, Tom. It's the dumbest timeline, buddy. Dumbest timeline. We knew RFK was going to be bad.

Like you knew it was going to be bad, right? Did you think it was going to be this, right? Did you think it was bad? By the way, our last video got taken down because of vaccine misinformation. Did you see this? I did, but it got put back up today, I saw. Did it? It did.

They reviewed our claim and they're like, yeah, oopsie. Whoops. I know, I love that YouTube is like, hey, fuck with your livelihood. I'll get around to it maybe. Yeah. You know, you're just like, hey, fuck with your livelihood. I'll get around to it, maybe. Yeah. You know, you're just like, hey, maybe don't do that part. I think I am thankful that we don't have to rely on YouTube for funds like that.

You know what I mean? Like, because if so, that would be awful. It would be terrifying. We'd have to make a different show. You'd have to make a totally different show. But, you know, we knew, we knew when he was running, that it would be a terrifying thing if he became president.

And we knew once he started talking to Trump, we're like, no, this is not gonna be a good thing. This is gonna be a scary thing if he gets into this department. If he becomes a secretary of Health and Human Services, he could really do some serious damage to our country. And we've seen already the damage that he's doing to people that he's suggesting to do

things other than vaccines. He's going to start, they're probably going to start rolling back certain vaccines. They're going to make vaccines more difficult to test than they were before. We covered a story last week about that. And now he's talking about me. He's like, now he's like, well, what is my other? Is there another pet project I can go after? Having solved all those other things that I was working on.

Why don't I look for something else? And he's like, how about chemtrails? Fucking chemtrails. Chemtrails? Really? And then he's like, yeah, I'm definitely gonna make them change how they do stuff. I'm definitely gonna do it. He already knows the conclusion. We talked about his study. He already knows the conclusion, what he wants to have happen. He already knows. Same thing here, he already knows what he wants to have happen and he's gonna, he's gonna go in and he's gonna fuck with things.

And I mean, this is a guy who's just, he's just a conspiracy guy that you let loose in the government. That's it. Yeah. He is he is convinced as are so many other people that chemtrails are full of some evil shit. But it's like dude if they're full of evil shit, they're full of evil shit the government you now work for is putting out there. Yeah. Like like like these guys are a war with themselves. That's what they don't understand. Like, you know, these guys are a war with themselves. That's what they don't understand. Like, you know, Trump is at war with the fucking his own intelligence service because it's got the word intelligent in it and he's fucking confused. It's fucking health. Yeah. The health and human services guys is at war with like physics and airplanes

and how do they work? Because he doesn't fucking understand that like a byproduct of burning jet fuel is fucking water vapor that then fucking turns into ice and there's little fucking ice there. And that's what a fucking chem trail is. It's just like a fucking byproduct of goddamn burning jet fuel. You stupid piece of shit. That's all that it is. He doesn't know that these guys don't know anything.

They are not smart guys. They're not like, this is the opposite of Enron. This is like Nornay. Like this is fucking like backwards, bizarro Enron. It's not the smartest guys in the room. It's the dumbest motherfuckers that you, like these are the guys who got legacy admitted into fucking Ivy league schools,

drank their way through four years, pledged fucking skull and crossbones or fucking whatever it is and then daddy got him a job somewhere. These are trash people. They're fucking idiots and animals. They have no business being in government. Chem tree to get rid of chem trails? No you're not.

There is never going to be a day you're not going to look up in the sky on a nice blue sky day and be like, yup, that's where an airplane was cuz long as fucking physics works That's how it's gonna be. They're gonna be like, sorry. We're taking a we're taking jet fuel out You just got to flap your wings really hard. That's what you're gonna have to do We're not allowing no more jets burning anything up in the atmosphere. It's it's like yeah It's you know what this is. Did you ever see the fucking movie Chicken Run? The Clay Nation movie Chicken Run? I feel like the Health and Human Services guy

is like that fucking grifter chicken in Chicken Run. Like trying to teach everybody all the fucking chickens how to fly. It's like, nah, it's nothing. That's nothing, man. Chickens can't fly. Fucking idiot. You fucking idiot.

And there's all these people are like, well, maybe we'll flap our stupid fucking wings hard enough. Ka-ka-ka-ka. You fucking idiot. And there's all these people are like, well maybe we'll flap our stupid fucking wings hard enough. Ka-ka-ka-ka. Like, Jesus. God, what an embarrassment we are. Thomas, stop pretending that you're high on drugs. It is a sin to even pretend that you're, you're, you're baked. He's too scared to actually take drugs.

Drugs are bad. This story's fucking nuts. This is from the Mirror. Pam Bondi insanely suggests that one third of the US population would have died in the last 100 days from fentanyl-laced pills. A whole third. Donald Trump's attorney, a whole third. Well, it's actually more- That's a lot, Tom. That feels like a lot. I think the number is higher. I think it's closer to 70% because what she says is that in the first hundred days, Donald

Trump and his administration have saved 258 million lives. That's a lot of lives. There's only 340 million Americans. That's a lot of lives. It's a lot of lives. Admittedly, that's a lot. I wanted to do this one as our last story because these numbers are fucking bonkers. Listen to this, listen to what she says

out loud with her mouth face. In President Trump's first 100 days, we've seized over 22 million fentanyl-laced pills, saving over 119 million lives. pills saving over 119 million lives. Cecil, are we all eating one fifth of a pill? Is it how many pills did she say? 22 million pills that saved 119 million lives.

Yeah, I guess you got to find five friends and then you got to split it. And then you all die. Does she think? That is, that is, that is some potent shit. That's all I'm saying. And then that number later. Yeah. It's so potent that like you take it like everyone standing around you dies.

Like you just like, you, you, you take a fucking. It's like a pill grenade. You just walk in, you take it, you just like poof. Boom. It's like a pill grenade. You just walk in, you take it, and you're just like, poof. Boom! It's like scanners. People are taking fentanyl pills and just exploding in the fucking cereal aisle. There's just fucking fentanyl just shooting out of your body like a sprinkler. All these people accidentally catch it in the eye and they die immediately. It's crazy. She later says, at the cabinet briefing.

Okay. So she's revising her numbers now. She says that Trump prevented 258 million deaths and that authorities collected 3,400 kilograms of fentanyl in the first hundred days of Trump's presidency. And then she says, are you ready for this media? This action saved 258 million lives every day. Like there's so much wrong with this next sentence. Every day, kids are unwittingly consuming dangerous

substances thinking they're harmless medications like Tylenol, Adderall, or Xanax, only to find them tainted with fentanyl, resulting in sudden fatalities, and no more because of you and what you've done Cecil what I? Don't think kids are walking around Popping fucking zanies and thinking that this is harm. Yeah. Hey dad. I

Yeah, I got to draw like one of those hand turkeys later When I do the hand turkey I got to pick the five people I'm gonna kill with myself when I take the pill. So that's how that works. What's that, Dad? My grape juice? Yeah. And my Xanax? Sure, Dad.

Oh, it's fentanyl again. What the fuck? Seriously, have you heard of Tylenol being spiked with fentanyl? Dude, I've never heard of Tylenol, Adderall, or Xanax being spiked with fentanyl. Maybe Xanax like if you buy street bars or something, but not like medications you're getting from the fucking CVS or whatever. What on earth is she talking about? And also like who's giving their kids Xanax and being like that's harmless? Or even Adderall being like, that's,

like these are prescription drugs. You get them from the pharmacy. They're not adulterated. If your kid is on a fucking prescription drug, it's not adulterated. If your kid's on Tylenol, presumably you bought it in a box and it's sealed and there's like a whole thing with Tylenol being poisoned.

They've kind of gone through great lengths to make sure that doesn't reoccur. Yeah, yeah. Who's going around wasting all this fentanyl by injecting it onto the Tylenol? Like, what do they get out of it? I don't even understand. What world is this happening in? I think what I think is happening is that they just recognize that they can say literally anything.

Anything. Because they did it with immigration, right? They'll say anything that they want, and it will make people realize that they, it'll make people who don't check anything and don't care about facts, they will be on their side and be like, hooray. So if they say that they removed a bunch of people

from the country that were dangerous criminals, even if none of them happened to be that, it doesn't matter, as long as the narrative goes out that they've specifically wanted. So if she comes out and she could just make up whatever number she wants, she, I mean, she could have a wheel in her office that she spins. It doesn't matter as long as she just says, well, we saved a bunch of lives because President Trump is out there collecting fentanyl pills or whatever. And that's saving lives.

And there's going to be a dumb person out there is like, see, they're saving lives. What do you liberals hate? You hate that that's saving lives. And there's gonna be a dumb person out there who's like, see, they're saving lives. What do you liberals hate? You hate that they're saving lives? You're like, no, I hate that they're lying, that they're saying they're saving lives when they're just pulling some pills off the market. That's it. Look, I'm not pro-fetanyl.

Like, I think fentanyl's a problem because it's objectively a problem. I am not pro-fetanyl. I am happy when we remove fentanyl from this sort of supply chain of illicit drugs. It is a dangerous, bad thing. We should have zero fentanyl out in the world. Fetanyl is bad.

That's an easy thing for us all to say. But 258 million lives? That's 70% of America's not fucking doing fentanyl, man. Like, what are you talking about? 70% of America's not fucking doing fentanyl, man. Like what are you talking about? Why would a cartel kill 70% of all of its, how did we survive 102 days ago if the world were this dangerous?

This is like fucking public service announcement, fucking quick sand everywhere and power lines are down and fucking everything's covered in fentanyl. Oh, but G.I. Joe can save us. There's just some kid who's just free bass and Tylenol that's laced with fentanyl somewhere. What is happening? What worldview do you have? Dude, I don't even know what this is. Jesus. Jesus.

All right. That's going to wrap it up for this week. Uh, we'll be back in a couple of weeks with a patron show, but we're going to be back on Monday with a full show and we'll catch you then, but we're going to leave you like we always do with the skeptics creed. Credulity is not a virtue. It's fortune cookie cutter. Mommy issue. Hypno Babylon.. Couched in

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