Comedy Bang Bang: The Podcast - Andy Richter, Jon Gabrus, Vic Michaelis, Casey Feigh

Episode Date: June 6, 2022

TV’s Andy Richter (The Three Questions) joins Scott and intern Gino Lombardo to answer Scott’s Four Questions, share his Burbank celebrity story, and find out why Gino has been in the hospital. Then, teenager Susie Tewman drops by to talk about her secret double life as a foreman. Plus, a young time traveling Scott stops by to save present day Scott from making a big mistake.

I'm half the man I used to be, which is twice the man my grandfather was, who was with third of his son if I used to be 28, am I greater than or less than my father? Welcome to Comedy Bang Bang, okay? Thank you, Big Man Albatross for that catchphrase submission, Big Man Albatross, and welcome to Comedy Bang Bang for another week, and my name is Scott Ackerman. We have a great show coming up. We have a teenager. All right, well, we have this guy and a teenager on the show today.

All right, well, you know, I was hoping when we returned to the studio, we would like get some star power going, and then, you know, certainly my first guest. That teen is not with me, by the way. Okay, thank you. I did not show up here with a teen. Okay, good. Well, we do have at least one famous guest who's, yes, no, he's looking behind himself, wondering if I'm referring to someone behind him.

No, I'm talking about him. He is, of course, he was a television mainstay on all of our flat screens for the last three decades. The ratings don't reflect it. No, in fact, they continually slid down and down. They sure did. Did they not? Yes, they did.

It was like a tire losing air. Yes. He also was coming over and trying to compete with me with his podcast. Oh, yes. I am a real Johnny come lately. Incredibly lately. This lucrative podcast game, I shot right to the middle. You think you're in the middle.

Interesting. All right. Well, we'll discuss that. Listen, there's so many podcasts. I'm like, you know, like if you're like in the top 1000, you're like, wow, you probably are actually his podcast is called three questions, which is ironic because today is the debut of one of our features on the show called four questions. Oh, wow.

Yeah, I do. Not much about fucking ripoff. Is it? No. But please welcome back to the show. Andy Richter. Hi, everyone. Hello, everyone.

Thank you. It's good to see you too. Let's get into my four questions. Yes. All right. What's your first name? Interesting. This is why we do four questions because I always thought that it was Andy, but no, it's

Paul. It's Paul Andrew. Well, that's that's my second question. What's your middle name? Middle name is Andrew. But my mother called me Andy from the beginning. And when I asked her years later, you know, which it actually when I, when bill collectors were still a problem and they may still be at some point when sent when they called for

Paul, I was always, you were tipped off. I was like you to hang up the phone. And I was like, no, I would just say like, uh, he's not here. This is his roommate, Glenn. I don't know where Glenn goes is like his roommate, Glenn Ford. And, um, and so yeah, it was very handy in that sense. Yeah. Um, but it, it's caused, you know, confusion forever in the marketplace.

Yes. Well, no, it's not marketplace, of course, because you are Andy Richter. We all know Andy Richter, but between friends, every once in a while, like, I think before I knew this, you used to email me, I'd be like, who's this Paul? Yeah. There's that. There's also PaulRichter at gmail.com before. Yes.

Look it up. Uh, but yeah. And so it's been confusing. And I asked my mother at one point, like, why did you not just call me Paul? If you're going to name me Paul? She said, well, I like the way Paul Andrew sounded. And your name Paul for your, for her uncle Paul, her, her mother's brother said, but I didn't really like him very much.

So I didn't want to call you that. Great. All right. Do you like Paul better? Or would you like, is there going to be a late life change? Honestly, at this point, I don't. Not that you're late in your life. I don't.

It's the sort of thing that it's like, you could be directly in the middle, you could be in the first third. No, no, no. With the singularity coming up. We have no idea. Oh no. Listen, I'm, I'm. Transport your consciousness.

I don't want you without the door. Do you really? Yes, I do. I do. I just, I, you know, I've put on the pedal. Time to tap out. Bacon at every meal. No, I don't know.

I, you know, who knows who knows who knows who knows anyone can do anything they want. That's my opinion. Every time I eat a salad, I think if I die in a fucking car wreck, I am going to be so pissed. Yeah. I could be having a donor. I know.

Exactly. You want to die of a heart attack. Yes. Yes. Yeah. Exactly. I sat next to I was just talking to somebody about this yesterday. This is, this is a Burbank celebrity story.

I'm going to patent them. So this is a Burbank celebrity or a celebrity you saw in Burbank? You're both. You'll see. Oh my God. This is exciting. I live in Burbank and one Sunday morning, I got up and it was, I, you know, I was alone. Oh boy.

And I didn't expect to get there this quickly. No. And I was going to, so I, but I was going to go to breakfast. There's this little place in Burbank, an excellent place called Beebees. It's a breakfast place. What's that stand for? Do we know? It's B-E-A-B-E-A.

So I don't know. What's that? I don't know. But I, it's very crowded, very busy, but they have a little counter. So as a single, you can usually go in there and get. This is what people don't understand about being single. It's wonderful whenever you want to go to a restaurant. Absolutely.

Absolutely. Yeah. And then you, you don't have people talking to you expected, you know, you can just get your food done. Yeah. You can get that dirty business over with and then get the fuck out. And then get to your other dirty business when you're shooting it out. That's right.

But so I go up and there's like a half hour wait. It's very busy, but I'm like, is there any room at the counter? And she says, yeah, I think there's one spot. So there's like, it's like eight seats at the counter and low, you know, just like stools, stationary stools. And there's one guy on the end and then there's a empty spot and then the rest are full. So I have to kind of like maneuver into, you know, it's not tight fit and I sit down. And as I sit down, I realized that the solo guy on my right, the waitress is bringing

two English muffins like on, like she couldn't put them on one plate. She put them on two little plates and she laid it down in front of this man who was eating and it was in addition to all his extra plates, three fried eggs with a side of fries, a steak, a side of bacon, toast, and then the two English muffins. And I looked at the food and then I looked at the guy and it was Jay Leno. And you know, I mean, there's a history. Yeah, a little bit of a history between the two of you as far as I remember, believe I read a book about it once or something, but I mean, at this point, I mean, I'm sitting

you're all in at this point. And plus this is the hottest breakfast spot in town, elbow, elbow to elbow to him. And I just was like, elbow to rolled up a suit, jacket, elbow. No, no, no, to a denim shirt, a whole fucking Jay Leno experience. Yeah. And and I and I just I was like, oh, fuck. Hi, Jay, Andy Richter. How are you? And he goes like, oh, geez. Hey, oh, hey, hey, whoa, hey, do you want to do Jay walking?

I didn't think you guys were supposed to be talking to me. I said, Jay, I really want to get breakfast. This is what I have to do to get there. What am I, you know, I mean, I just I'm like, you know, just like an old tired whore like, oh, that guy was as well. Well, breakfast makes strange bedfellows. It does. It does. And and within about three minutes, he's like, you know, all that stuff.

That was that was just business stuff. You know, oh, just business all the network. It was all the network. And I just was like, and I actually said like, well, some of it wasn't the network, but we don't need to talk about that. So how do you feel the being on his right where you sort of like, God, this feels pretty good. Like if I can swap out like what what what would have happened if Conan, you we all know Conan got deposed.

What if you'd said like, I think I'm going to stick around, be here with Jay. Like the no one fired you. Yeah, no. Well, someone, you know, someone who did do that was Max Weinberg. Oh, he stuck around when there was. Yeah, because the whole thing was that, you know, they wanted their their hole because Jay went on a tan and then it was terrible. And then the real problem was that the all the local news tanked

because of Jay's terrible lead in the terrible lead in of Jay because Jay. You know, you see Jay outside of the institution of the Tonight Show, you know, he's driving fucking fan boats on CNBC, you know. So ten o'clock, you know, he does this show and it doesn't catch fire. And local advertisers are fucking pissed because that half hour is where they make a lot of all the money. Yeah, they don't make it on the Tonight Show. They don't have to license anything.

That's all their money. Right. And they got to pay for the two idiots that are reading off the prompter. Yes. That's about it. And the weirdos who were standing outside of tragedies. It plummeted. They were down across the country like an average of 30 or 40 percent, which is real money. So there's all this, you know, finagling and NBC comes back and says,

how about we have Jay just on for half an hour for like a little, you know, the monologue, like, you know, that beloved monologue. Yeah, that invigorating, thrilling, electric monologue. This guy's in the news and this guy's in the news. Yeah, yeah. He had about this tired thing that no one cares about. But so and then it was going to be half an hour. And then the Tonight Show would be on at midnight, which would which Conan

rightfully thought that would be the disintegration of the. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So they said this is what's going to happen. And Conan said, no, I don't want to do that because it's just the beginning of the end. That's like that's like the first the first dose of arsenic. The first nail in the coffin out of 36 nails, perhaps. Yes, I don't know what it takes to seal up a coffin. He called it the death of a thousand cuts was what he called it.

So we said, no. And then like two days later, Max Weinberg's in the paper like, well, hey, Jay's looking for a band leader. Yeah, then go over well. Oh, yeah, yeah. Well, I mean, everyone moved out here. And what it really told me is, don't say that, Andy. Jay's looking for an announcer, a sidekick.

I'm available. Go through proper. Yeah, I'm a newspaper. And I live in Burbank. I'm local. You know. Oh, my gosh, should you have stayed at midnight, though? Should you have moved into midnight?

No, no. Oh, OK. Yeah, yeah, no. All right, interesting. No, I mean, and well, ultimately, too, it always was, you know, we went to TBS and there it was it was it was like 6,000 cuts are death. Not just like drew out longer. But, you know, he owned that show and he never would have owned the Tonight Show and just we and we got to do

whatever the fuck we wanted over there. Yes. And so it was really a nice it was a we were there for 11 years. It was a really nice place to work. And I I don't you know, I think it worked out great. Yeah, no one can argue that the two of you and especially you, perhaps made your mark on television history. We did. They really did.

I don't know. That's weird. I mean, I'm I'm very happy that that show is meaningful to comedians that like we're kids when that show started right in and that it's meaningful to them in the same way that the shows that were meaningful to me were like S.C.T.V. and S.N.L. You know, there are shows. Yes, all those. Spider-Man. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, it's Satan's Creek. So show it from my mind. That's not you've been imagining it. It's not a creek that's really hot. That's kind of a shit's creek spin off from what I understand. I could have gone with that. But, you know, but yeah, I mean, that's I'm very happy about that. But I the notion of,

you know, being a fixture and all that kind of shit. I just because I feel like I still haven't even really started firing on all cylinders. Yeah, like I'm still holding back. Yeah, you know, I'm still like I'm still like a fuck up who if like nothing is required of me, I'll just like I'm like, I think I'll make lasagna. And I'm like, that's my that's my, you know, my big ambition for the day left to my own device. You're like a modern day Garfield in that way. Exactly. You have a John Arbuckle.

Conan is John Arbuckle to you, is he not? Who's Odie? Is that Max? No, Max isn't Odie. Odie would probably be one of my kids. Oh, right. One of your kids. The other one doesn't exist in this analogy. Maybe they just they trade Odeous. Odeousness.

Well, this is why we ask the four questions on the show that opened up. I mean, the other two, you know, obviously, what's your last name? Ricker. And then will you see yourself out? Yes, I will. Absolutely. I've been here before I know how to get to the door. OK, good. Well, Andy Richter is here. And is that you? Are you peeing in your?

Well, I just, you know, that was this is we got to get some waters for these guys. Oh, wait. Thirsty over here. Geno. In turn, Gino is here. Yeah, sorry, I'm a little late. These flights are fucking crazy. Everyone's getting duct taped to seats and shit like that. I was trying to get here, but the fucking my mask was not.

People are after me for wearing a mask, even though mask mandates have been lifted. Yeah, people are. So you were wearing them. What kind of mask was the kind that prevents you from biting the people who are handling you? Oh, this is a Hannibal Lecter. Yes, yes, that's what the lady kept calling it. Did you have a ball? Is it a ball game? No, I wish that I'm familiar with, but I couldn't have that.

I'd be rock hard the entire flight and you don't want to get hard when it's when you're up there in the high pressure. Oh, no, no, it'll explode. Yeah, you could. It's like a cartoon thermometer. People who do the mile high club, man, I don't know how to do it. I don't know. Has that ever happened to you where you like you wake up from a nap on a plane and realize, oh, shit, I have a full erection?

I went, I came in the toilet in first class. Jesus, wow. TMI from Gino. And that's, of course, a Gino Lombardo story. Yes, not a story that anyone else. No, that's just me, Gino. I love to jack off on planes. Sure, sure. I bet into the toilet.

Yeah, like I'm not a monster. I call me in my pants and fucking leave in the spackle for the whole ride. Gino, welcome back. Thanks for having me, Scott. Hey, this is Andy Richter, whose real name is actually Paul. We found that out on the four questions. That's fucking wild. Are you from the south? No.

Because a lot of southerners are like, yeah, call me Andy. And it's like, well, what's your name? It's like Warren McAndrew. And you're like, OK, Andy. Yeah, no, I grew up with kids that just had completely different like like a girl that named Sis. Like a girl named Sis. Yeah, and it was like her name was Sis.

But then her real name was, I don't know, Linda or something like that. I knew a boy named Sue once. It was very interesting from the movie Swing is. You ever hear that song? And I have the audience is laughing maniacally every time he says it. Like not just the first time and then diminishing returns. They're laughing like it's the funniest thing they have ever heard. People like to help out.

They were they were starved for comedy, is my opinion. Yeah. And now they're over comedy. That's right. Yeah, this is we're doing post comedy right now. Comedy comedy died years ago. It's got to be something funnier, right? Gino, you're back. Where have you? I mean, you you have been gone for a while.

We had I was in I was in the hospital for quite a bit. But now I'm all recovered and back to I'm allowed to fly again. What were you doing in the hospital? Amy Fisher had burst both my testicles with a kick to the nuts in an unsanctioned Long Island Fight Club tournament. Oh, no. Yeah. This is what, 30 years after Amy Fisher was even a thing. Yeah, no, she's she's still a thing.

She just not in the news as much, but she's chasing it. She came out with Golden Palace written on a titties and started fucking absolutely murking me. She was fucking. I couldn't believe the anger that the Long Island Lolita brought to this. Oh, my God. Why did you agree to fight her? Because I haven't fought a woman in a couple of years. And I and look, I'm a feminist.

That's sexist. I think I think I think anyone could do every. I fought I fought man. I fought non-binary. I fought adults. I fought children. It's nice to finally fight an adult woman. What about animals? Not your friend, sis, but an actual CIS. Yeah, right. CSI.

I thought, yeah, fuck. Well, don't even get me started on fun. I got my fucking ass handed to me by Gary Sinise. CIS New York. Oh, is there another one? CIS Miami. Well, that's too bad. I'm so sorry.

So you were in the hospital to recovering your testicles. Yeah, well, well, to major testicular torsion is what they call that I had a trance. I had a transplant. So I have, you know, I have goat testicles inside my balls. You have LL Cool J's testicles. LL Cool J considers himself the guy. He coined that phrase.

Oh, well, good for him because just coined the phrase. So he's the goat at coming up with the term. With the term goat. OK, because he's not the greatest of all time. Well, he considers himself to be the greatest of all time. He has heavy context there. Ladies love Cool J's, OK? He loved abbreviating things.

That's the whole thing about him. Wrapping, as far as I'm concerned, is actually about extending thoughts over rhymes. He just loved condensing things. He loves acronyms and licking his lips. That's two things he loves. For someone on a tight schedule like me, it's great. It really is. Yeah, exactly.

I don't need all those words. I'm so tired of saying self-contained other water-breathing apparatus. I can just say scuba. By the way, the self-contained part of it, it's not really that interesting anymore. No, it's just better than uba. Yeah, we could call it uba,

but then Ugo and Duba gets... Yeah, well, uba and lift. You know, you get both of those going and shit, and you're fucked. And then there's ube, which is Japanese purple yams. Yes, of course. And don't get one of those stuck in your ass. Take it from me or a friend, whoever.

Have you been to Japan? I have never been to Japan. Really? I'm dying. What are the places you've been? Because we know New Jersey, or no, Long Island. Jesus, fucking Christ, how could you forget? I've been coming on here and doing the same shit for 10 years.

They're the exact same place to be. Yeah, well, they're very different to me, okay? I'm so sorry. I know you have William Joel is from there. Yeah, we have William Joel, and they have Jonathan Bonathan-Jovitz. Right, yeah. Have you heard his voice recently?

A lot of hubbub, people are recording his recent concerts. Who, Billy or... No, the latter. I don't give a fuck about that guy. Okay. Yeah, let that motherfucker buy another arena football team and leave the fuck alone. Which one did he buy? I don't know, maybe I'm making this up.

I thought he was like bid in for the bills or something. They should be called the Bon Jovitz. He was, yeah, but I don't think he got it. But yeah, he wanted to be an NFL owner. Yeah, imagine if Trump actually got the USFL off the ground. We might have never had his breath. Oh. Man, I would sacrifice that.

Not watching a different sport? Having to hear about a different sport while I'm trying to just drink alcohol on a Sunday morning. Oh, fuck yeah. So I got these goat testicles and they're smaller than my original ones, so it's great because now my PECA looks bigger and that's going to be a fucking huge victory for me.

Yeah, congratulations. But the thing is, these nurses at fucking Winthrop Hospital in Manhasset, they fucking giggle their little asses off. You think they're professionals, right? You're like, oh, look at these. These people dedicated their lives to become RNs, registered nurse.

Not right now. OK, millennials. And they just giggle and giggle and giggle at my little balls. It's like, where are they seeing them that often? That they come in and change the bandages. And like, you know, OK, yeah, yeah. And I have like just that little transparent part

of my scrotum from the repatch. Yeah. Oh, oh, so wait, they got tape? They can use silicon skin, but it's see-true. Oh, OK. So if you see true, you see, you know, all the blood and the vas deferens and stuff like that right around in there. That's what it's like a watch with a glass back.

Yeah, that's exactly that's exactly what it is. Sort of like a moonroof in a way. Yeah, it's sort of like a Hibachi restaurant. You can appreciate the craftsmanship there. Oh, yeah, you get you should. I will post it with the show notes. And I don't think I really don't believe we will. But I'll post it to a friend, a comedian friends Instagram.

Oh, OK, great. Text it to me again. Yeah, all right. You lost it again. So it just it got lost in the other stuff. They'd be down there and they'd be just like, Tee hee, Tee hee. Yeah, and then I would hear like I would hear like some of the, you know, other nurses be like, bad, you know, like making cold noises and I knew what they were.

I knew what they were referencing. Yeah, your testicles. Yeah, and then the vegans come and knock in when they need me to come in their coffees so that they can have non-dairy, non-cow milk creamer. OK, so laugh it up, vegan nurses. It is dairy. Oh, shit. It is dairy. That's why they have just a different animal.

Yeah. Oh, OK. They're giving you like tempeh balls and maybe. Or just like a couple of edamame. These are permanent, permanent balls. These are permanent. These are permable balls. Permable balls. So no, nothing can happen to these. I deal. They are unburstable.

That's what they graduated. Like LL Cool J, they were been referred to as unfuck widable. Do you notice a difference in performance? Oh, yeah, yeah. I'm able I'm able to sing so much better than I was pre. Oh, you mean like sexual performance? Oh, yeah, no, but whatever. Yeah, no, I get I get harder, even easier.

OK, and then I last a little bit longer, but the orgasms are not as good. Oh, I'm so sorry. Yeah, that's that's the whole reason we do it, usually. Well, yeah, I'm racing to the finish here. I'm you know, then justifies the means Machiavelli, baby. I don't give a fuck what got me there. But I need the nut.

Jesus. Hey, oh, sorry. You need people like me on the wall. OK. You're on her. I don't care what got me. You're goddamn right. I ordered to come in the coffee. Well, this is I mean, do you know the goat? Was it a famous goat or was it just a?

Yeah, it was the goat from Adam Sandler's first comedy album, the one who chips his fucking horn. You got that one. That's incredible. Yeah, it's really it's really cool. It's really fucking for me, a guy who grew up listening to that album and all the way through is like early 20s. Did he give them willingly or or the I mean, it's a goat. He had passed. He had passed.

He had died in hand to hand combat against Eddie Money in the same fight club tournament. Wow. And it worked out well, because I was like, we need they were kept screaming like the EMT is like, we need testicles stat. We need test and then Eddie Money's like, I got two testicles to paradise over here. And I was Mr. Money, please. He's like, no, my father's Mr. Money.

Call me Ed Money. The EMT is the Eddie Money trio, the cover band. They were there rooting him on because their friends is like, you know, the guy from Big Shot plays with Billy at MSG. Of course, everybody knows that, right? Of course, we all know that big shot. The famous Long Island Billy Joe cover band that performed at Mocay. He's a want to have you. They are now performing live with Billy.

This guy's like Billy's literally doing shit like taking away guy who still has his capacity to sing. Really? It's fun, though. It's fun. Who else? Who better? Because he wants to do it in the original keys or I thought he transposed him down unlike Paul McCartney. Oh, I don't know what any of that shit means. Like I can sing better with the go testicles,

but I still can't read or understand music. Yeah, are you still in that Children's Choir that you were telling me about? The Unique Children's Choir. Yeah, I'm still in it. And they still haven't found out about my genital situation or the fact that I'm an adult. Yeah, that would be more pressing to them, I would imagine. They have two questions on the form, age and genital situation. Two questions. That's not a bad idea, because people like shorter podcasts.

Yeah, you should start this, too. Like two questions. Are you a child and do you have genitals? What are you? You're I've been thrown out of so many playgrounds for asking these questions. There may not be any teens showing up here later. OK, well, unfortunately, we do have a teenager coming up a little later. But I have a shit. I used to be a teenager, so I guess you used to.

But you're only 20. I'm in my early 20s now, still somehow. I'm I'm in my 12th year at Nassau Community College, studying to be an audio major, right? And eventually I'll have enough credits to start working here at Irwulf full time. And I'm here right. You're barely here anymore. You came in right at the right time. I know, I know.

You and you you've aced the Getting Waters course. I've aced the Getting Waters course. I'm I'm I haven't been able to do comedy bang bang in a bit because of the hospital shit, but I was I like people doing remote records. Yeah, so I was able to help. We were in my backyard for a while. You never made it back there, did you? No, no, I can't be in.

I couldn't be in the sun with the medication. Oh, really? Yeah. So and that's hard for me as a guy loves to get tan. So you can't have tan and balls. I cannot have tan. Oh, tan and balls. Sorry. Merry Christmas next year, brother. I cannot fucking do it. Yeah. Wow. Yeah, it's brutal.

Well, that it's so good that you're back up on your feet. I mean, I feel great. I truly feel great. And with the smaller balls, it's easier to walk and I can only imagine because, you know, you know, every once in a while, you you'll get them twisted just like crossing your legs or something like that. Oh, yeah. Yeah, you got to be careful. That and they'll like wind around each other a lot.

And then you feel them slowly unwind like a lifeguard whistle, you know, spinning it around. And it's just it's just great to be able to fucking have normal ball stuff happening. You know what I mean? Because you yours were larger than than normal. When you say when you say yours are smaller, they're about human size. Is that? Yeah, they're back to goat. They are goat size, which is just a little smaller than human. Yeah, nine, 10 scale.

Yeah, yeah. Yeah. It's about like 85 percent the size of. But my old balls were like one hundred and seventy percent the size of. Right. Yeah. And they weren't old balls. They were, you know, they were on there in the early. Previous balls. But yeah, my previous balls, my ex balls, my ex nuts. These things were fucking like yam bags. We had like two oobies in there. Right. Yeah.

Gosh, any questions for Andy Richter here, by the way? Since you're on, Mikey, usually I beg your pardon. First of all, Gino doesn't show up more than once every four months or so. Yeah, he commutes from Long Island. It's a long commute. I was going to say I got to take the fucking subway. I got to take the train from I get I get on in fucking Massapiqua Park and then I go to Massapiqua. And then from there, it's Seaford, Wanto, Belmore, Merrick, Freeport.

I don't normally go this way. The bad, the westbound train. Yeah, it's a miracle. I'm not minding it right now. Cue gardens and then Jamaica and off the Florida keys. And then the Penn Station. Yeah, I get the Penn Station. Then I take the air train. I take the A down to Howard Beach, transferred to the air train, get to JFK,

walk to the end of the Delta. This fucking thing is like 600 miles. Holy shit. And with freshly sewn up, transparent scrote. Yeah, you do not want to be walking two miles to get to the Delta lounge. OK. All right. So I fucking get there, get on the plane. Then I'm flying across the plan.

I don't have to list all the states we fly over because no one gives a fuck about the other 48. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, just whatever. It's Wisconsin, Chuset, so whatever. And there's white people and corn and shit. You'll love it. And then I fucking land here. I get into my Uber or a Lyft. And the Uber takes me, you know, wherever.

In this case, ear wolf. Yeah. But you're probably probably taking the 105 down to the 10. We're taking the 10. We're taking the 10. We're taking the 10 to the 110 to the 101. This is where I shine. Oh, yeah. I don't know any. Tell me your route.

I don't know fucking cause for the life of me, dude, except for Gary Lumen. And the movie, of course. Yeah. Which one is the movie? The Owen Wilson, the Furious. No, no. That's Paul Walker. RIP. You get those two guys. No, Owen Wilson is still with us. Oh, he is? Yeah, he.

Ah, man. What a fucking bad news. Wait a minute. This sucks. Owen Wilson's still with us. Oh, come on. He's one of our greatest treasures. I love the guy. Whoa. That's wait. That was Joey.

Oh, sorry. Whoa. There we go. There you nailed it, Ben. Hey, should we crash this wedding? Yeah. Look at that. I remember all those New Line Cinema babies. Smoking. But yeah, but Andy, he's also normally not on Mike.

He's used to he should be behind the boards, writing novels and faders. I'm checking the Luffs. You got this fucking loose cannon Devon in here. So I got to like keep. Yeah, he's well. Yeah. I mean, you know, we've had to pick up the slack with Devon over here.

Yeah. So you bring in an extra engineer guy who's got the experience. I could take a look at the Luffs. I could take a look. Exactly. But in any case, he's usually not on Mike. But since you are, if you have anything you want to ask Andy over here. Yeah, sure.

About his career or his life. I've been a big fan. I was one of those guys who grew up watching Conan. It's, you know, the masturbating bear. I love all that. But my question for you is, Andy, what is your middle name? Oh, no, we we covered that.

Are you serious? Yeah. Before you got here. You've got to be fucking kidding me. Yeah, those are your two questions. Yeah. I'm sick of answering it too. So I'm not going to. Yeah, that's fair.

That's fair. It's actually going to be good. That's good for radio. People going like, I'm not answering that question. I can play that out of context. We'll stick that out. Yeah, I can put whatever question I want in front of that. Billy Bob Thornton here, right here.

Would you ask Bob Dylan that? Why do I know the Billy Bob clip you're talking about? Yeah, I know. I'm so young. Why would I know? What was that, 10 years ago? And that's a modern reference for me. All right, well, look, guys,

we have to take a break if that's OK. When we come back, we have, I'm looking at my notes, a teenager will be here. OK, I'm going to change my bandages real quick. Oh, OK. Oh, in front of us or? No, I can go into the bathroom, but unless you guys request in front of us.

Devon said, keep it, put him on the glass. He keeps saying. Oh, OK, really? He keeps asking us to put everything on the glass. I don't know what is going on. Can I tick-tock it? Yeah, of course. All right.

We are going to come right back. We'll have more with Gino and more with Andy Richter. What a pleasure to have him here. We're going to be right back with a teenager as well. We'll be right back with more comedy. Cue commercials. Comedy bang bang. We're back.

We have Andy Richter here. The three questions is his podcast. What's been going on with the three questions? Who have you had on lately? What questions have you had? Oh, it's always the same question. Well, yeah, but I mean, it's just it's just it's just to set the tone.

Do you never ask any other question? Do you? Does it have to be statements and declarative questions around? I, you know, I thought that this would be a good just a good format for it. But it's become so fucking annoying. It's an albatross around your neck. What's the other question?

That's more than three questions. It's just like, you can't. Podcast listeners are the worst people in the world. Well, no, it's just people ruin everything. Yeah. That's if I have any message to the young people out there. It's yeah. Give it back to the beasts of the field.

If you want to feel better about everything, I would recommend going on Reddit and searching your podcast out. That's how you make yourself feel much better about it. I don't even know enough to know that, like, oh, why would let's stick your face in a hornet's nest. No one tries to get psychologically inside the head of podcasters and guess how they feel about their close friends. No one's doing that on fucking Reddit.

You fucking freak. I think you and I have had some issues lately. Yeah, someone tweeted. What's Gino's beef with Scott? Guess, let's do an episode. Well, look, guys, it's three questions. There is no better podcast out there, but we do have to get to our next guest.

They are a teenager. I have no other information other than that. But am I allowed to come in now? Yeah, please. Yeah, step into the light here. Yes. I'm sorry, we keep it so dark in the hallway, but no, it's OK. Hi. Hi. Oh, man, I'm so happy to be here. Scott, hi, Susie Tumman.

I'm Susie Tumman. Susie Tumman. OK, this is Gino Lombardo. Nice to meet you. I just got to say, thank you so much, sir. I have a health test on Monday on the male reproductive system and aviation. So this is really going to be helpful and aviation and aviation. Oh, OK, I see the combined two things.

That's perfect. This is going to be good. And I appreciate it. Well, feel free to ask me any questions and not. Well, you know what? Never mind. I'm backing off that. I should not. You're the questions guy. I'm not the question. Yeah. I'm not the person for children.

This is where he lives. A young person to be talking to period. Yeah, this is Andy Richter, by the way, as well. I don't know if you've ever had a television or I guess in the last 11 years, turned on TBS. I love television. Oh, OK, great. Well, Susie, Susie Tumman. Susie Tumman. How's that spelled? Is that T-W-O-M-E-N?

Or like my guess over here. T-W-M-A-N. Oh, OK, great, great. Wonderful to see you. Thank you so much. I'm so happy to be here. Yeah, why are you? Why are you on the show? I don't usually have people of your age on the show.

Scott, you know, I'm just like a normal teen in a lot of ways. I have the best. Which ways? Which ways would you say? I have the best friends in the world. I'm constantly worried about whether or not Paul Giari is going to notice me. And I have like, I have a pretty big secret.

Oh, OK. Can I share it with you? Who's Paul Giari? Who's Paul Giari? Is that someone I should know? He's a senior. Oh, he's someone you know. OK, I was wondering if he was like a politician or something. I'm a sophomore. OK, that's not unattainable.

I mean, but it would be a problem if the relationship were to continue after he turned 18. Sure. He's 17 and a half. And a half is, yeah, you really only have a six month window to get this done. But then you only need to take a year or two off. Then you can get right back on. Yeah, exactly.

I mean, that's I feel uncomfortable even saying this to you now. As I know, that's what you're saying. The windows closing, though, is what I'm saying. Dudes do that. So fortune favors the brave. So you should get in there while you're in any case. But what was the third thing you said? A secret. I got a bit of a secret.

A secret. Yeah. OK. Well, well, I'm trying to balance all that stuff. Also a foreman of a non-unit construction site. Wow. Oh, interesting. Interesting. And you're keeping this a secret. I'm sort of living a double life. I really want to keep high school one thing.

And then this thing that I'm really, really good at. Right. Separate. Yeah. Wow. OK. How did you get into this? I mean, that's such an odd thing for a sophomore, a 15 year old, I would guess, to be doing. I mean, was this a hobby of yours? It's really crazy.

I was just at the mall one day and a guy came up to me and said, hey, we need somebody on our site in 10 minutes. And I said, well, Frank, Frank's my stepdad. Can you sign this state of Ohio permit for me to work? And he did. And so then the next day, I was on the site. Oh. OK. So you're on the show to share this secret?

And you want this, is there a reason why you want to push this information on them? Well, I need some help. Oh, OK. This is the place. This is the place. Yeah, we're three well adjusted. I mean, he's a little young.

Does the help you need happen to be construction knowledge? Well, a little bit of both. It's, you know, I'm trying to balance this life. And you guys are all so accomplished, you know, getting to the airport and being able to drive yourself to a studio, working on a television show. Yeah, exactly. So I was hoping maybe you guys could

help me find the balance a little bit. Why did they think you would be good at this? That's the other question. Someone came up to you and said, we need someone on the site in 10 minutes. Follow up, did you go straight to Foreman at that point? Or were you like added to the site and then eventually? By the way, your name is Tumen.

So it's like you became the double of your last name. Oh, shit, the double life you're living is weirdly enough. Oh, I mean, I don't get anything. It's interesting. I'm a numbers guy. That's how I know that JFK Jr. is coming back. I don't want people to recognize me. So I do have a disguise that I wear

when I'm on the construction site. It's a very short wig and a hat. Because you have very long hair. I do have very long hair. But you wear a short wig. Never cut it. So how do you get all of that under that short wig? Oh, a lot of work.

It takes hours. And how do you balance your school work with the? How do you balance work and family? Yeah, exactly. Yeah, how do you balance work and work? That's what we need to ask. That's a great question. I'm still trying to figure it out.

I got a math test on Tuesday, and I'm trying to study that as I'm taking all these union posters out of the break room. OK, so wait, you not only run a non-union construction site, but you're actively at the union bus stand. You're the head scab. Not the time. Not the time, Susie. Listen, what can I say?

We got 100 unit building that needs to go up in four weeks, and we only got 10 guys on the job. That seems dangerous. That seems like a dangerous place to eventually live. That's 10 units per guy in just a few weeks? I don't know. Listen. I could do a unit maybe two a day, tops.

If you press me, I could do maybe one unit in a year. I could bang out a couple of units. I'd have to ask friends how to do it, you know, and maybe get some advisors. Listen, it sounds totally unreasonable, but don't worry, I have safety meetings every single morning, and I tell them it's safer for you to not say anything and just shut up and do the work.

Wow, OK, yeah. Have you ever had any trouble with mob muscle you know, staring the construction business? Boy, have I ever. Yeah. Yeah. How do you deal with it? You said it kind of cutely, but it sounds like it's something

that might be terrifying. The Ohio mob. Oh, man, I wish. No, we're talking the drama mob. Oh, oh, this is high school. OK, OK, all right. We used to call it clubs when I was in high school. Weirdly enough, I don't think I have any expertise

to help you with either of your problems. I was a high school outcast, and the one time I worked on a construction site, I fucking hammer gunned my feet to a girder and they left me standing up there throughout an entire rainstorm. No, no hard hat. Hey, that sounds like one of my sights. Well, that's Susie.

I think that could be risky. You know, come on, you got to be careful with these. These are people. These are workers. I mean, are you making bank? You making money? Yeah, I'm making a lot of money. Yeah, I mean, this must be what is it?

Six figures at least. Don't worry. I'm keeping it off shore, Scott. You are very well-climbed about. One ahead of Scott's four questions is always where you're keeping your money. You ought to let this senior boy know all this. Don't worry.

My stepdad, Frank, has taught me right. He said two things that have always stuck with me. One, don't take coffee creamer from anybody that lives in Long Island. And two. That'll come in handy in one or two specific situations. And two, just keep your mouth shut and do what the boss says. And if the boss doesn't like it, then we

know where the bodies are buried. Oh my god. Is your father in the business? He's my stepdad, and he's the best. OK, not my question. Is he in the business? What business? The business of construction.

Same business you're in. Oh, no. He's a model scout. Oh. I was going to say, because you're beautiful. I don't think you're allowed to say that. I mean, not in a creepy way. I just, your cheekbones is what I guess I was.

Your bone structure. Backpedal. Is what I meant. I mean, you're classically put together? Is that something I could say? Worse, arguably worse. I, for the record, want everyone to know that I think she's ugly.

OK. Thanks, Andy. You're welcome. I'm just saying, it seems like if you wanted to work, you could maybe do what your stepfather is out there looking for instead of this. But that'll fuck you up. Being a young teen model, that's just not good for you

in the long run. Being a young teen construction foreman, you're making friends. You're learning all kinds. Are you making friends? Me? Yes, you. Not really anywhere, Scott.

I'm trying really hard. I have two friends at high school. We've been friends since, like, fifth grade, which is crazy. But I feel like we're kind of going in separate directions right now. Really, why is that? Well, Checkers is sort of, like, really gotten into music lately, which is great.

And I'm very supportive. But, you know, they're off doing that. And Paul is doing sort of his own thing. Your friends are named Paul and Checkers. Yeah, my friends. And wasn't the guy you were into named Paul? Yeah. Is this?

Different Pauls, God. That's not Paul G. Artie. No, this is Paul G. Oh, Paul G. Wow. What's the G stand for? I wish I knew. He's your best friend?

He's my best friend since fifth grade. You'll get there. You'll get to learn what that means. And then for me, you know, I'm just trying to deal with 14 to 17 adult men who are trying to increase their wages. Wow. It's really tough.

It's really similar problems over here. Are you doing any kind of, like, strike busting kind of stuff? Or, you know, taking bats to vehicles or anything like that? Oh, my god. Scott, who do you think I am? Of course not. I have people that do that for me. Gosh.

Is Paul G. one of them? Well, when he's got the time, he's been really busy lately with his band. No, it's Checkers is in the band. Wait, check it. Scott, I feel like you're not listening to me. This is just a lot of information you're throwing at. It is a lot.

Checkers is in a band. Checkers Band. Scaw. Scaw Band. Oh, Scaw Band. Oh, his name fits, then. Oh, OK. So this is like fifth wave.

His real name is Check, but he goes by Checkers. Oh, OK. That makes sense for the Scaw Band. And what's the name of the band? Checkers and the Boys. Checkers and the Boys. Who are the boys? Nobody.

It's just Checkers. Oh, wow. How do you play a Scaw Band with just one guy? That's a great question. He might be bringing it back. It might be his testicles. Yeah, true. Checkers and the Boys.

Yeah. He may. That's interesting. My testicles are, of course, gender non-conforming. Oh, good. Because I, you know, I'm going to go testicles. I'm not going to apply gender. By the way, have you ever been on a podcast before

where we talk about testicles a lot? Oh, yeah. And I really should have addressed that before dropping in some testies chat. Hey, don't worry, Juno. I work on a construction site. I've heard it all. That's true.

I did a little construction back in the day, too. So I can't really connect on the high school thing, because my high school life was weird. But I have a couple of questions about this drama mob. Oh, please. Is it like, are they extorting you? Is it a major issue? Is it a protection racket?

Like, we won't act around you if you give us money, or? Worse. They say my hair is too long, and so I can never be cassette and lamez. Do you want to be cassette and lamez? Who doesn't? I mean, it's got a showcase song. It's my dream.

Yeah. That's my dream. It's On My Own? Is that what Cosette sings? Yeah. You guys are fucking dorks. Can we hear a little bit of it, Dima? Yeah, of course you.

I'm looking right at you when I say anything. OK, you want to hear me sing? Sure. I mean, you say you have talent. It's your dream to do it. Let's hear a little bit. On My Own? Juno might back you up, because he's

got that beautiful operatic good ball singing voice. But my voice has gotten so much better this season. So do you want to do the merriest part? Yep. OK. Cosette doesn't sing on My Own. They sing the one with merriest that's at the gate. Oh, yeah, now I know what you're talking about.

I'll jump in right when. What does Cosette sing? A song. Oh, this is your dream. Scott, I feel like you're not listening to me. I'm trying to. I feel like Scott just really wants to sing lamez. Just do it.

Go fucking full bolo over it. I've just been practicing really hard. On every single lunch break, I've been telling the guys, we're not taking lunch until you listen to me do my audition piece a couple of times. And then we run out of time. Then I send them back to the site with no cost. It's like an unpleasant place to work.

Now, is there a reason you won't cut your hair? Because if the only thing stopping you from playing Cosette, is it? Cosette. Cosette. Cosette. Is the long hair. And by the way, Cosette doesn't have short hairs.

Although she is an orphan, is that correct? Well, maybe they cut the hair in order to make sure there's no lice in it. Technically, Vell's not adopted her. Oh, OK. She's an ex-orphan. Makes your hair very unhealthy. She's formerly an orphan.

She's a orphan. The orphan formerly known as Cosette, the orphan. So what are we talking about? Singing. Yeah, let's hear you sing anything. Oh, I'm so nervous. I just want to hear the quality of your voice. Come on, we finally have a teen girl in the studio.

Let's make her sing for all of us. Completely normal behavior. I don't feel at all like a Sultan in the movie Taken. Can I say, when I was walking on the street earlier today and the three of you walked up to me and said, come on in the studio for a little bit. We promise we won't lock the door. I mean, we were OK.

You said you had a secret. You came up to us and said, I have a secret. And I said, and you were like, and we were like, we have a platform in which you can share it potentially. Yeah, I mean, yeah, I don't remember who decided who was going to be on the show. It was his guy. Oh, OK, yeah.

Right, right, right, right. Now it's coming back to me. It was Scott that said he wouldn't lock the door. So I locked the door. Yeah, right. And as you should probably know this, and Scott doesn't want this information out there, but he is also running a non-union podcast.

So you will not be getting paid for your time. I don't know that podcasts are unionized generally. I mean, yeah, you can take the step if you're the guy. Good for you. And if you need any protection. I'm not really in charge of anything anymore, by the way. I know some really neat guys. If you need the podcast.

Where do you meet these guys? Hmm? The mall, Scott. Yes, you. What? The mall. The mall. Hey, attention, Scott.

I feel like you're not listening to me at all. You've never said this before. So you hang out at the mall. On my own. Oh, OK. That's how it was written. Woo! Oh, my God.

I do that part over and over and over again. I mean, I wouldn't mind it if I were singing the show and they just sang, On my own. Do you mean it? On my own. Yeah, you do mean it. I really appreciate that. Yeah, no problem.

Scott, I feel like you're not listening. It sucked. Oh, that's right. Gino, thank you for your honesty. I just don't want to mislead you. I feel like construction might be your thing. If you refuse to cut your hair to become cassette and you refuse to learn more than the opening lines,

I feel like there's something inside of you that doesn't want to be more interested in this. Also, there's something sitting right in front of us. Wear your work wig to audition for Cossette. Yes, your work wig. Oh, my God. But wait, then maybe checkers in Paul Geo finally catch on that I'm not just ready to teach.

Are they hanging out at this construction site a lot? Well, they love hanging out at the construction site. It's hard to keep track of all your concerns. You see them every day at the construction site. This feels like Ozoff season five. Get the wig, guys. So they're not recognizing you at the construction site. Who do they think you are?

No, because I even had in a wig. They think I'm the foreman. You are the foreman. You're not the two-man. You're not Susie Two-man. You're a completely different person of foreman. Yes, they know I'm a teenager on the construction site, but they just think I'm a teen foreman.

OK, so they're aware that you're young. They just don't know you're you specifically Susie Two-man. They don't know I'm Susie Two-man. And how does that help you? How does that help you, then, not knowing you're Susie Two-man? The power dynamic. What would happen to the power dynamic if they know? Now we know the name of this.

Are you an unnamed teen foreman for them? Listen, my stepdad Frank said number one rule is never let him know where you live. Oh, right. OK. I thought he had other number one rules. Number one rule I think was don't take coffee creamer from a dude from Long Island.

Right, right. I'm sorry, I'm getting a phone call from the site. I got to put my wig and my hat on. This is going to take a second. Oh, is it FaceTime or is it FaceTime? No, it's just an audio call. But I got to get into character. Into character, yeah, it's easier, yeah.

Yeah, OK. Wow, that is really long hair. Ma, ma, ma. Vocal warm-ups. Bricks. Bricks, yeah. OK, great word to say once. OK, Scott, answer it.

Oh, OK. Hello, hello. Hello. Hello. Is the foreman there? Yes, this is me, Teen Foreman. Yeah, sorry, I just have you saved in my phone is the foreman. It's Ronnie.

We're fucking. You have a question? Yeah, I have a question. It's why I'm calling you Foreman. We're fucking knee-deep in nails here. And we got no fucking hammers. What do you need us to do? That's so crazy.

If I wanted to hear an ass talk, I'd fart. Click. Whoa. Wow, why did you have me answer the phone? That was fucking. I know, I like that. Again, I'm seeing Susie's all about the power dynamics. She's got you answering the phone, but she's hanging up.

Yeah, interesting. I'm sorry about that. That was great. You fucking rocked that, dude. Go ahead, take your wig off, let your hair down. Shake it out. Whoa, beautiful. Thank you.

I don't think you're allowed to say that, Scott. Sorry, I beg your pardon. Oh, man. Wow, I mean, you're really good at your job, I gotta say. You really put the fear of God into him. Thank you. Yeah. Seems like a great place to work, if you're being honest.

Yeah, tons of nails, no hammers. I would leave high school if I were you. Like, why are you even bothering with high school? Just feels like a part of it, you know? I just want to live life to the fullest. Yeah. I want to be able to take my math tests and complain about boys with my friends who

don't talk to me anymore. What math are you studying right now, by the way? Pre-algebra. Pre-algebra, OK, so you're not even very far along in math. Me? No. Stop saying me. Pre-algebra in sophomore year, isn't it?

Like, that's a terribly behind. I took algebra in freshman year. Oh, missed the smart pants. Yeah, oh, post-algebra. I got a C. As far as I recall, I'm not so old. She's working class, though. Yeah, that's true.

Yeah, you're going to call. Oh, no, I'm very rich. Oh, really? Why are you doing this? Your dad is an Ohio model? Are you stepped at an Ohio model? He's got a pretty big secret, too. Oh, no, what is it?

It's a pyramid scheme. The model pyramid scheme? That's less of a secret than you think it is. And honestly, it's kind of like an open secret. If you're at a mall in Cleveland picking up models, I don't think you have that many connections. So he's recruiting models that have to recruit two other models?

Exactly. Yeah, and they have to pay $700 for the headshot. To the person in front of you. And finally, my stepdad, Frank, ends up getting about $14.50 from each person. But that adds up. That adds up. And don't worry, we keep it all off-shore, OK?

OK, good. Wow, I mean, what an interesting person you are. I mean, quite honestly, when we saw you on the street, I was like, this is a beautiful team. We've got to get her into the studio. I'm not saying that. I was so far away from you, and I got scared at first when you screamed at me.

But then I was less scared when I got close. Well, it was three streets away. Yeah, it was down the block. We had to chase you down, they asked you. I just saw the outline of you. He wasn't screaming words. He was just screaming. Screaming, just super.

Can I just say, you guys are pretty fast runners. Yeah, well, you know, when you have to be. You'd be surprised, yeah, when you got something. Yeah, you came up to us like a character from a Japanese horror film and said, I have a secret I want to share. And we were like, well, let's get this team girl on the mic, let's go.

I just like walking on my hands. That was, let's talk about that. That was fucking awesome. That was fucking sick. You have a lot of skills, yet I feel like you're misusing all your, I think you're misdirecting a lot of your energy. Right, yeah.

And also you're just, when we practice to deceive, you know, you're really making a mess of your life. You think? It's gotta be hard to keep all these stories straight and all these, you know, compartmentalizing everything the way it is. It's not healthy. It's gonna be worse.

I got prom next week and nobody's asked me. Oh, no. I'm making Giles go with me. Wait, correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't the prom for the same day? The seniors and seniors? Oh, no. Sorry, go ahead.

Isn't the prom the same day as the inspector is coming to visit the site and you have no idea how you're gonna be able to swing both? Yeah, it's gonna be really tough. I'm gonna have to bring my wig to prom. No. Oh my gosh. I brought my beard to prom.

Change in and out of your gown and then back into work years. Man, those late night weekend inspections. They kill you. You're gonna get busted when you're like underneath dancing with the accidentally have your hard hat on, but you're gonna get a full prom. But then all the other people in high school

would be like, that looks pretty cool. And suddenly they'll all have hard hats on. They'll all be like, I wanna work in non-union construction. To be worse, Paul, my date, asked on a cut of the prom and so I don't really know what to do. So I made Giles come with me. And whose Giles he hasn't, has he been mentioned yet?

No, I don't think so. No, I was gonna fire him. And then I said, if he really wants the job, then he can do me a little favor. And that favor is coming to prom with me. So he's a grown man from the construction side of stick. He's a grown man from the construction side, yeah. You don't meet a lot of fucking rock breakers

named Giles these days. He's 6'8, 350 and about 45 years old, yeah. I'm not gonna say my type, but that's hot for me. Not for you, removing you from the context, that's hot to me. To make it even more complicated, it's Paul's uncle. Oh my gosh. Paul, is this the Paul that's a friend

or the Paul that you love? Scott, I feel like you're not listening to me. He's the one asking you this. Well, there's two Pauls. Yes, well three if you include this one over here. That's true. Let's keep me out of it. Please.

I am not taking you to prom. Who's Paul's uncle? No, which Paul is the uncle? Giles is. Which Paul's the nephew? Yeah, the uncle of Paul. Which Paul is the nephew? It's a different Paul.

Oh, a third Paul. This is our confusion. So Paul, who goes to your high school with you? He's a shoo-in for the lead in the musical. Oh, wait, he's gonna be... Is it late-miss? No, it's Heather's. Heather's the music.

And you keep auditioning to play cassette? Well, I'm hoping that they're gonna see my audition and look at me and go, wow, we couldn't imagine anybody else in the role, so we're gonna change the show. Change the entire show, rather than just the actors. I got the cash I've offered to pay to change the licensing fees.

And why haven't they taken you up on this? Because it's gonna take me a few weeks to get it from Brahma, so. Because it's offshore. It's offshore. Oh, okay, got it, yeah, yeah. Oh, man, well, I gotta say, Susie Tuman, you're a very interesting person.

I'm so glad you dropped by, but we have to take a break. Does that surprise you? Am I allowed to go into the hallway for a little bit? Is that door gonna get unlocked? No, you're not. Okay. Me?

Yes, I'm okay with a break. We do have to take a break, but can you stick around? Me? Yeah, yeah, I am talking to you. Okay. I feel like she's not listening to you. Yeah, you're the one not listening.

I gotta go. Oh, no, no, stick around. Okay, I'll say. Yeah, we have a break, but when we come back, we have more Andy Richter, we have more Intern Gino, we have this teenager Susie Tuman. Pretending he's beside me.

There you go, all right. I'd love to hear that during the break, if you could. No, thank you. All right, all right. We'll be right back with more comedy bang bang after this. Roll ads. Comedy bang bang, we're back. Andy Richter is here, three questions.

Oh, sorry, I'm still choked up from that song. Oh, it was gorgeous. I couldn't believe she did it. I thought she wasn't gonna, holy shit. Yeah, just the first line over and over and over. I gotta re-gauze my fucking throat. Did you think I couldn't do it or I wouldn't do it? Both. Okay.

Yeah. Just checking. You thought you would refuse and then also be unable to. No, and instead I was two-wheeling and I wouldn't stop. No, yeah, you did stop though, so thank you for that. Although we had to shut down for about two hours while you did all this, but we're back up and running.

And Andy Richter, the three questions is, anywhere you get podcasts, is that correct? Or have you withheld it from certain places? No, no, no, you can get it anywhere. You get, it's actually being sold on little flash drives at truck stops. Oh, okay, great. I got an episode in a bottle at a bodega.

Oh, okay. It was fucking great. I got it open, I thought it was gonna be a sober lizard drink and then it turns out it was a full episode of three questions with Solomon Giorgio. It was fucking crazy. Scott, I wasn't allowed to ask a question. Oh, yeah, please ask Andy a question if you like, yeah.

You did, oh, no, you're right, you didn't, okay, yes. Well, I guess my question would be something I've been thinking about a lot, which is if you had to put a name between your first name and your last name, what would that name be? Oh. If you had to, no, a third name, probably.

If you had to put a name between your first name and your last name, what would that name, sort of in the center? No, that's the middle name. Weirdly enough, you were on pattern and you weren't here earlier. Scott. Whoa, what the fuck is that?

It's me, I'm you, Scott. Oh, wait, who, what, who, where, when, why, how? There are gorgeous questions. Wait a minute, this can't be young, Scott, this is just a tall white comedian guy. No, no, I'm you, when you were 15. Oh my God, a portal just opened up in the studio. Another teenager.

And this lanky good-looking fellow just stepped out of it. What math are you taking? Algebra. Ah, what a genius. What a fucking liar. Okay. Look, I came here today to stop you from doing something. Today, your whole, your whole life.

You're a time traveler? Yes. Yeah, someone came to me and said, today your whole life gets ruined. Oh. As an adult, man, start talking about how hot a 15-year-old is. Oh, you're a little late.

And every, what? Yeah. Don't even worry, I'm not 15. What? I'm 14. Oh, oh, oh, wow. Oh, no. You're young for a sophomore, I gotta say.

Thank you. When was your birthday, December? Wouldn't you like to know, Scott? I'm too late, I missed it. You missed it, I, oh, I'm so sorry. Classic, hang out, Scott. Do you want to take off that messenger bag full of comic books?

It seems like it's so heavy. It's affecting your posture. Yeah, yours. This is all that matters to me. This is all I have right now. Oh, no, don't tell me, did they find out about the other thing? Ah, what other thing?

Did people find out that we had a dream where we were kissing our mom, but in kind of a like a sexy way? I think they just did. You just said it on mic, yeah. What is, what am I, Andy Richter's here? Yeah, Andy, yeah, do you remember? Let's see, I'm 29, so this is 14 years ago.

He wouldn't have been on TBS yet. Does this surprise you to know that he's on TBS? I was wondering why the young you is sepia tone. Wait, no, he's in the prime. He's when I was number one on the call sheet a couple of times. Yeah, wow. You know Andy, we know Andy Richter.

That's when he was a private investigator. We do know Andy Richter, yeah, can you believe it? I mean, what an honor. All right, so things are going good for us? I mean, I don't think. They're going fine. It's more of things are going bad for Andy. Yeah, exactly, exactly.

I mean, I. And if you use that to measure your own success, which is what something a lot of people do, is like, well at least this person's doing awful, like I can bounce, you know, and I use that, you can use that. Oh, I use that constantly. Yeah, exactly.

At least I'm not this fucking guy. Yeah, yeah, that's how I get most of my ambition is like, that's fucking guy? Yeah, wow. Typical Andy, right? Yeah, it's one of your fans. Andy did one episode of comedy bang bang. It was like, I got to get my own.

It's this easy to sit there and let other people fucking answer questions. Yeah, yeah. Like do other people make shit up and you just sit there and watch the cat roll in? I can do even less questions. Hello, Italy. Hello, three figure salary.

What are we, are we a radio? Are we a talk show? Yeah, it doesn't, a podcast? Do you know what a podcast is? No. It's like the radio, but less cool. I don't know if you know what a digital video recorder is, but I consider podcasting to be like DVR radio.

Yes. You can listen to it. This is what's crazy, because this blew my fucking mind. I'm a radio major. Say Tevo, he would probably understand. Oh yeah, Tevo. Yeah, did you know what Tevo was? After 2001.

Oh. Yeah, you would know, right? No, I think, yeah, you would know what Tevo was. Yeah, it's early adopters of Tevo, so yeah. Do you know who Bruce Springsteen is? Oh, thank you. He has a great podcast with a guy named Obama who's gonna be coming around soon.

Okay. Is that true? Yeah. Okay. Yeah, they did a nice eight episode series or something. That feels like a lot of work. Well, if you come from 2001, you might not like the name on bottom.

Yeah. Might be a little close to something else that's going on around the time of 2001. Oh, okay. Oh, all right. You may want to stay here. Well, can you do me a favor? Because you came here to save Scott.

Could you pass a message back to 2001 when you get there? To Mark Wahlberg? Yeah. Tell him to get on a plane. Get on the plane. And he's the only one who can stop us. Oh, until Seth MacFarlane, take the flight. Okay.

Yeah, I know Mark Wahlberg. You know Mark Wahlberg? I know who that is. Marky Mark. Yeah, good vibrations, yeah. I know everything you know. Where's the time machine located? It's not in the World Trade Center, is it?

No, no, no. Okay. It's in our parents' big minute. Oh, okay. Imagine if he goes back and then all of a sudden there's no Ted. Oh yeah, how would our lives be different? Wait, I have a question.

Does that mean that it didn't work? Because if we know who Seth MacFarlane is right now, does that mean he went back in time and it didn't work? Oh, well, that's if you subscribe to the traditional single-tail time travel theory. I can't do that. I can't do that, actually. I'm sorry I asked the question.

I know someone who didn't understand these kind of things the last time they were on the show. Maybe I want to go ahead. I got very confused about it. Yeah, I think, Susan, you've got enough stuff floating around in there. We don't need to add quantum physics. Susan, Paul, like me.

Do you know why Paul doesn't like her? Is that something that's happening right now? He might be in his father's balls by the time you go back. Or maybe in a coffee cup. Help us on that. I'll do the Mark Wahlberg thing. I don't know the Seth MacFarlane.

Oh, okay, around your time he's singing karaoke at the Brass Monkey here in town. Okay, he actually seems easier to get a hold of. He's actually there with a bunch of porn stars, if I remember correctly. Okay, all right, yeah, I'll try that then. We'll see if the little 15-year-old get it with some porn stars and a guy singing karaoke at a bar.

All right, I'll try that. In my experience, they absolutely will. Might I recommend a short wig and a hat? It lets you get away with a lot, apparently. You'd be surprised. Art Blanche. Yeah, okay. Can you change anything about my life?

I mean... Well, what I was thinking of doing, you tell me, because we're the same person, but at this time in our life, I know we really wanted to be in O-Town. The little porn hit factory. Ashley beat us out. Ashley Angel, yeah, he beat us out for that.

So I was gonna try to go back and see if I could do something to change the narrative. Yeah, turn him into an actual angel. This is why you have the Pearlman tattoo? Yeah, exactly. I knew he loved the guy. I didn't know why. Well, I thought it was funny, it's a pearl necklace

because it's around my clavicle, and then he asked... A Pearlman necklace. He asked if he could give me a pearl necklace and I kind of got everything confused, so... Pearlman! That's what still loves Lu Pearlman in this time, right? That's what still loves Lu Pearlman in this time? He's no longer with us, so...

Yeah, and people were excited about that, that he passed away. Oh, wow, a lot of stuff is... Oh, here's the thing, I wouldn't use... Oh, I don't even want to explain what the internet is, but I wouldn't do any modern research as to some of your favorite actors and... What, the internet?

I didn't have the internet until 2011. Oh, no, no, it was... I mean, back in the 90s, maybe even the 80s. Jesus Christ, I was on Prodigy Bolton Boards in 2010. The band? Yeah, I was going like, who is the fire starter? Go play my game, I'll test you out! You know how to be Drew Barrymore?

Really? Oh, man, I hope he fixed his hair. Yeah. But is there anything else? He's no longer with us, unfortunately. Anything you want to change? Anything we could, I mean... Yeah, I mean, if you could just...

If you ever hear the word podcast, if you could just like stay away from it all, and just go like, I'm not going to do those anymore. I'm going to focus on my writing career, my directing career. Oh, cool! I have a pitch. Demand a sequel for Shark Tale. Yes.

Demand a sequel is part of the deal. When they tell you no? Okay. All right. Don't take no for an answer. All right. I'm going to write that down there. Shark Tale is the fucking nexus of society.

If we get Shark Tale 2 and God forbid, Shark Tale 3D, we can get the world back on its fucking axis. Yeah. Tell Jeffrey Katzenberg that $175 million in the theaters and U.S. alone is actually good for where the movie business is headed. All right. So he's going to wish he had a $175 million

for their animated feature, but Will Smith and Jack Black. Oh, Will Smith? Will Smith, yeah. He's, well, he's not doing all that great these days. But do we know him? Yeah, we're big friends of his. Whoa, holy smokes. Andy Richter, Will Smith, what a life.

What are you complaining about? Uh, I'm more of a Chris Rock guy, so I worked with him on the Oscars, so. Oh, okay. Fair enough. So yeah, that won't make any sense to you for quite a number of years. It didn't look like it made much sense in the room.

It doesn't make a lot of sense, though. Wait, did you watch clips before coming in here? No, just this room right here, I'm saying. Oh, okay. There's no reaction when you said it. That's all, yeah. Oh, well, I'm used to that, by the way, by the way. Yeah, the 20 years that you've been.

Yeah, that makes sense. On the break, we'll watch, we'll show you King Richard. Yeah. So you can have some context. So you'll know who Venus and Serena are. You don't even know who they are. Yeah, that's what you need for the context, is to watch King Richard.

Then you'll understand everything. It's going to make perfect sense after that. Did we ever get to singly, Miss? No, unfortunately, no. I got to watch it a couple of times. Okay. You like play, Miss? Well, yeah, we love it.

It's our favorite musical. We love it. Aside from the Music Man and sometimes West Side Story, depending on casting. Right, exactly. Really? Yeah, well, sure. Sometimes you see it in an all-white city

and it feels a little weird watching that one, but then sometimes you go where it's cast a little bit better and it feels like more of a fun production. Wow, what else do you like? We like all the stuff. We like comic books. Same. Our favorite color is... Yeah, of course.

Green. Oh, green is purple. Purple is green type of color. I love green and purple. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it's very gnollish, green and purple. It's very gnollish. Right, hey, younger me.

Yeah, I think you got a shot with this beautiful, beautiful 14-year-old. Is this the one you call smoking hot a bunch of times? You need to back off this, Scott. I can hear you whisper into your... She's really... I don't think you guys should be that close to each other because if you accidentally touch,

God knows what can happen, right? We've been touching under the table. Okay. We've disproved that theory. I see even young Aukerman has wildly long legs. Yeah. Oh, they're like twirled together like pasta underneath here. What the fuck is going on?

It feels comfortable. I don't know. It's like wrapping yourself in a blanket of yourself. I think you could take her into the Airwolf restroom, the one where you can't flush toilet paper for some reason. And you could maybe get something going here, you know? I mean, I was a virgin for so, so long. You could change that.

Okay. I would never have to do podcasts anymore. Okay. Yeah, maybe that's the one I'm here for. Maybe that's why I'm here. Yeah, lose your virginity in the future. Okay. Okay.

Scott's really rolling the dice here on his younger self. Please. I'm totally having sex, but if you could break the curse of virginity, that would be good. Everything would be different for me. Go ahead, go ahead, hit her up. Hit her up.

This is fucked up. I don't want to be pretty. It's really weird. It's really weird. Sound speeds. Hey, yeah. Hi, you like Les Mis? Yeah, I love Les Mis.

This is my favorite musical. Wow. Oh, sorry. My phone is buzzing. Do you want me to answer this? Yes, please. Hello. Yeah, I'm still, I got a fucking nails.

I got hammers. I don't know what we need to get done here. Fuck off, Johnny. Okay. Sorry about that. Wow. Well, you have a phone that's that small? Yeah.

Oh, I'm actually getting into it. They got really small for a while, and then they gradually are getting bigger and bigger. Oh, weird. It says President Seth MacFarlane is solving climate change. That's pretty exciting. Wow.

President Seth MacFarlane. President Seth MacFarlane. No, we said tell him to get on the plane. Oh, but still, that means I must have done something. So maybe. Maybe Seth MacFarlane stopped 9-Eleven? Oh. Yeah, that's what we learned about in school.

So much better, instead of having 9-Eleven, we'll have more Teds. Right. He'll be president. As a lifelong New Yorker, I can't believe I'm going to root for the fucking Florida pilot class. I can't wait for the crooning fireside chat.

More than the 16 Teds that we have to learn about in history class. Oh my God, the whole, our whole reality is changing. Wow. The TCU. Oh my God, wait, let me check my penis. Nothing different. What?

You've never sealed the deal? How do you think sex happens? Your penis changes as you get older? It's more satisfied. You know more about sex than I do? No, I know the exact same. Maybe you've lost some knowledge. It's 8-7 Eastern time.

We got to sing the national anthem. It seems today, like, oh, you see. That French entendu me. Life is a family. Kick, ring. Family guy. I just checked while we were singing. I looked at my dick to see if it changed

and I have tattooed the words giggity, giggity, down my shed. Oh, no. But I have normal human balls and they're full of come, Scott. So when it's off it just says Gigi, and I show it after I play pick up basketball. So everyone knows I'm just saying good game.

By the way, this is a podcast. That's another definition. We talk about penises and balls a lot. Yeah, it's something everything happened. All this stuff happened to everyone except for us. We're the exact same. We're exactly the same. Well, I don't know.

I wish you could change my life, but it looks like I'm locked in here. Well, Andy, there's one thing I've always wanted to ask you. Sure. What's your middle name? Oh, no, we covered this already. Yeah. I can't do anything.

No, you're not gonna find out for another 20 years. No, I changed it. I changed it to Jay. Oh. Yeah, just so it's because since I work for Jay now, I... Can I just say? The timeline is, the timeline is false. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Andy plays bass for Jay. They play bass for his band. You're not the psychic guy for it. And I shine the fan boat. That's what I do. As a comedian, your time on that show was really important to me. It taught me that...

You're a comedian now? Well, it taught me that comedy's not for everybody and I should maybe do something else. Oh, okay. What do you do now? It kind of inspired Susie to get into denim and then construction. Yeah, what's your life like now, Susie?

Me? Yes, you. I'm listening. I bet your life's way less complicated. It's pretty simple, actually. I'm a teenager and I go to school and then also I'm a team foreman on a construction site and then also my stepdad Frank unfortunately passed away

in a really unfortunate mall-related accident and so now I run his pyramid scheme. Oh, wow. What's a mall-related accident? What falls under that category? A bunch of jeans that the gap fell on it. Oh, no, low-rise jeans? Yeah.

Oh. More like no-rise jeans once they fall on Frank. All right, Kate. Yeah, all right, Pete. Rest in power, Frank. But are you with, you know, what's his name? Kevin.

Paul. Oh, you're with Kevin. Oh, there's a Kevin. We need to talk about Kevin. Yeah, the three Kevin's in my life, the mean Kevin from the drama program, my best friend Kevin G and then Kevin Giari. What about checkers?

Yeah. Check. Check. Yeah, he decided that he was gonna get into the visual arts. Oh, okay, which visual arts are we talking about? Painting. Oh, okay. That's the most visual.

Yeah. Okay. One of the most visual hands down. Wow, it's so weird. It seems like my life is the only one that changed with the... Yeah, with going back and stopping 9-11. Maybe I was too focused on her and I did everything.

I'm sorry, I shouldn't have told you to try to hit on her. God, I fucked everything up. The last thing I remember is you said, come in the bathroom with me and I elbowed you in the nose. Oh, no. At least your nose looks better. And then you held the tissue to your nose, then you flushed the tissue down the toilet.

Oh, no. And it created a space-time continuum skip. And now who knows where the fucking universe is gonna land? By the way, do you have a time machine to get back or are you stuck here now? Oh, no. Oh, you didn't think about this? Well, when you're in a time machine,

you don't think about that. Oh, sure, yeah, you're so excited to go forward or backward at the time. Oh, no. I think we're coming up on a good sitcom idea here, though. Scott raising his 15-year-old self. Yes. Oh, yeah.

I'm a very stern parent, I bet. Okay, yeah, you can teach me all the things that you would have wanted to know when you were a kid. Sure, yeah. I don't know. And was there any lessons that went, as you got all these, I wish I would have known that sooner.

Well, you know. It's a sex thing, definitely. Always wipe. Oh, okay. Always wipe. No matter what. Yeah, not 50% of the time, not when you want to wipe.

I'm starting to learn that one. A good one, too, is like, when you're pushed down the stairs, tuck your chin and keep your elbows close to your body. Oh, don't flail. Yeah, exactly, yeah. Just because if you're gonna be Scott Ockerman for the next however many years of your life,

you will be shoved down multiple places. Yeah, exactly. Just listen to the whole Always Wear Sunscreen song. Yeah, yeah. That takes care of it. That was out already when you... I think so. Oh, but it's out now,

so since you're stuck here, you'll hear it, yeah. Okay, perfect. You may have to chase it down and find it. You can listen to it on your Android. Everybody's phone, the phone that everybody uses. Yeah, I wonder what happened in the past where we all have Android phones.

Dude, Seth McFarlane, Stopping911 has fucked us completely. Fuck everything up. Everything is cats and dogs, living together. Yeah. It's fucking twisted. I wish you could go back and change everything. Well, maybe I can.

I was sitting in our parents' basement listening to the new Mulan Rouge song, you know, for the hit movie. When all of a sudden, the power of the four queens singing came together and it was they helped me transport through time. Oh, okay. So maybe if the four of us sing together, is that...

Didn't we do that already? Maybe that's what caused it to be here. I don't know. Yeah, but we didn't know the words. Yeah. And I was singing with you that time, the national anthem that we all kind of hummed, but didn't know.

Yeah, I was in on that too. No, believe it or not, that's how it goes. Really? Yeah, if you really want a half-ass in. Strangely, I still have never seen an episode, even in this reality. I think it's against the law, though. Yeah.

To watch an episode or to not watch an episode? To not watch an episode, yeah. Think I'm a felon? That means you've never been to church. Always. I don't even know what that is. Me neither. It's just in my fucking brain, I can't stop saying it.

Oh, wait a minute. You know what? We have an ear-wolf time machine. We do? Yeah, it's right over here. Oh, heck yeah. Are you still allowed to use it or you gotta use the CBB world?

I gotta go through serious channels. You know what, I gotta run out the chain. I gotta ask Dr. Rod Dogg himself, the head of Rod Dogg Company. Yeah, hey, can you call Dr. Rod Dogg Devin? Devin. Devin! We're not talking about Devin.

Devin! He's doing the Home Alone. But if you're wondering why he's shouting that, it's because he's slapping his cheeks. Devin. You know the famous part of Home Alone? Kevin Macalester slaps his cheeks and yells his own name.

Ha ha ha ha. Look, I'm just gonna clear this. Okay, you can go back and tell Seth Macfarlane not to get on the plane. Maybe if we all sing Moulin Rouge, it'll send both Scots back in time. No, I don't wanna go back in time. I don't wanna fucking sit here and keep listening

to you yammer on and on. Wait, you think you're gonna be the host of the show if I can sit back and talk? No way, this guy's got fucking three questions lined up and ready to rock. I'll engineer all this shit. Shit. All right, I'll go back with you.

Okay. All right. I feel like this is the worst thing we can possibly do, but let's do it. Let's see if it's gonna scare the shit out of your parents. Okay. They don't notice. Look.

They can ignore two people at once. Yeah. Let's do it after our final feature though, okay? Because we're running out of time. We just have time for one final feature on the show. That's a little something called plugs. Here's the thing. Here's the thing.

Here's the thing. Here's the thing. Well, here's the thing. Here's the thing. Here's the thing. Here's the thing. There's the thing. Here's the thing.

Now, here's the thing. It's clubbering time. That's the thing. That was the thing. That was Here's the Thing by Chris Finke. Seems like they took every time anyone said here's the thing on the show. And then put clubbering time.

Put clubbering time by the, yeah, interesting. Thanks so much to Chris Finke for that. All right, what do we plug in? Andy, what do you have here? Obviously, three questions is out there in the world. It's been going now for about approximately two years or so? No, no. Longer than that, but I'm not good at that sort of thing.

Okay, maybe three years. Coming up on the third anniversary or so. Yeah, three or four years, something like that. Yeah, there's the three questions. And then, I don't know. You know, I've been in things, but now I don't know what our present reality is, so I don't know what to plug.

Is New York Minute still a thing that you're in? I believe, yeah, that will not go away. Okay. That survives in all time. Well, you gotta remember the low notes, so the high notes really sing. You know, I did two hours of work on that movie. I'll tell you the story later.

Oh, that's right. I think we talked about it before. I'm just waiting for that one to get me canceled. Oh, really? Yeah, I do a like Charlie Chan, Chinese accent. Oh, dear. Okay, let's not have that in the plug bag at all. I'll see what I can do.

I'll see if I can go back. Thank you, thank you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. See if you can stop the Olsen twins. Okay. Good luck. Just stop you from doing their movie. You don't need to stop me.

I needed the money. Yeah, that's true. And young Scott Ockerman kills Mary Kaynassley Olsen. Missed read the assignment. Yeah. Gina, anything you want to plug? Yeah, you know, I don't really have much going on, but one of my favorite Long Island comedians after...

Oh, this has got to be Alec Baldwin. Yeah, it's after Alec Baldwin, one of my favorite Long Island comedians and stuntmen. And I just got to bump it down to the second best guy, you know, go past Jerry, Eddie, you know, all the way down. All the way down. Tim Dillon, you get down below that. Dr. Jay.

You got John Gabrus. This guy's fucking great. The original Dr. Jay. Yeah. You know, he apparently is just leans into the gay stuff because it's like, it helped him be bullied in like seventh grade and developed who he was. Got it.

Yeah, and like... Why, what's he up to? He's actually, it turns out he's hosting a travel show with Adam Pally on True TV. So if you happen to live in a hospital waiting room or another place that has True TV, tune in on July 14th at 10.30 p.m., because that's the premiere episode.

Okay, so that's a... 101 places to party before you die. Wow, it's a little far away from there right now, but set your DVRs right now and maybe you'll come back and talk about it. Yeah, maybe I'll come back. Cause you know, John texted me and he's like, do me a favor, you gotta gas me up.

I'm on True, I don't know what the fuck where my life is going and shit. So I came in here, just try to fucking get it popping off. All right, fantastic. No, and thank you for that. Oh, of course. Intergeno and Susie Tuman, what do you want to put here? Just say a little prayer for me.

I got a math test on Tuesday and then after that, I got to lay off a bunch of guys right before Christmas cause they're trying to get healthcare. Oh, jeez. Say a little prayer for her. This is really before Christmas, by the way. This is six months or so. Yeah, but I got to gear up for it.

Oh, okay. Wait, you're doing it right before Christmas and you're just like gearing up for it? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I've decided I'm gonna do it just cause it's more fun that way, you know what I mean? Yeah. And I guess if you really want to do something,

you can follow at VICMMIC across all social media platforms if you really feel like it. If you really want to do something. Yeah, okay. And young me, what? I've only been here for like a couple minutes, but I already know that one of the greatest improv shows in all of Los Angeles.

Oh, so you're into improv? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, if you like improv, you're gonna love 2000s. That's when people give a fuck about it. Right, yeah. I'll get ready. You still like it? Yeah.

The people who do it love it. People now, they feel like it's just better if you write things down. Okay, all right. Well, I'll maybe take that note. Maybe not, we'll see. I got it, I'm petting it now. There's this great show in LA called Holy Shit Improv.

You can follow them at Holy Shit Improv on Instagram. They do shows every Monday. They've had groups like Big Grande. They've had Lauren Lapkus, Carl Tartt, all your favorites. You can watch it online or in person every Monday. Holy Shit Improv, check it out. Okay, great. I want to plug, obviously the Comedy Bang Bang Tour

is coming up all of August, August 1st through 28th. We're going to be hitting all of your favorite cities if you like the cities that we're going to. And from Minneapolis to Toronto, everywhere in between, we're doing it all of August. So head over to CBBworld.com. There's a tour page where you can get ticket links. And then while you're there at CBBworld,

obviously there's a lot of shows happening. We have Scott hasn't seen and the Andy Daly podcast project. And CBB presents a lot of good ones coming out lately. All right, let's close up the old plug bag. Take one hand, put it up. Take the other, put it down. You're gonna make a box.

It's time to start to close it. But don't close it too much or you open up the plug bag. We're opening up the plug bag. And when you open up the plug bag, you open up your heart for the rest of the world. I'm talking open up the plug bag. I open up the plug bag. Open up the plug bag as I am like you can.

Then you open up your heart. Open up the plug. You played the short version. Yeah, wow, that was the 2022 closing up the plug bag theme by John Astonish. Thank you so much to John Astonish. Now, Gino, you took your headphones off. We got six more months.

That's for all of 2022. First of all, yeah, you saw a shadow. So we got six more months of it. Guys, I want to thank you so much, Andy. So great to see you. Thank you for coming on. A fellow podcaster, of course, and a fellow broadcasting legend.

Yes, one of the merry few. And inter Gino, of course. Bob-a-boo-ee. Yes, you got it out. Say oh no, by the way. This is the oh no era, by the way. You haven't said oh no the entire time. Oh no.

There you go. Okay, thank you so much. Susie Tumen, great. Yes, you. Okay. Yes, I'm talking to you and I'm listening to you. Thank you so much. Scott, thank you.

All right, and Scott, young Scott. Should we do it? Do you want to go on one last adventure? Let's do it. Let's go back in time and then Andy can take over the show. Okay. And Gino, you'll, will you no longer?

I'm busy. You're busy. Yeah, I got some shit to do. What are you doing? No, I don't want to get into it, but I got a job at Stumptown Cream and Coffees. Oh. So I got to stay yacked up on Cialis and fucking THC

and all the stuff, a little bit of red wine, all the stuff that gets you a little randy, you know? All right. Are you also only coming in every four months for that job? Yeah, I'm coming in and I'm being fucking emptied. That's for sure. Susie, you want to come back in time with us?

No, thank you. Okay, all right. Well, let's do this. You ready? Let's go lose our virginities together. Okay, I'm starting up the time machine. What lucky woman will get to fuck the same man that is 20 years age?

Do you want to double team anyone back then? Like a weird Pepsi challenge. I'd love to. I pushed him through. Oh my God. I'm staying here. You're never going to take my show from me, Andy. What?

I knew this was a big plot on your, you brought the time machine in here to begin with, didn't you? I already told Jay. You and Jay together? Yeah, we were going to do it together. This sucks. Young Scott seemed more chill. It's less sad that he was in the crowd.

Fuck you, Gino. Ah! He throws beans in! Ah! Gino, I pushed him back in time too. Oh no! And I'll do it. They pushed me back.

They had a 30 second interaction with someone from 2000. Seth McFarland pushed you back. Seth McFarland. I was like, giggity, giggity. He shoved me right in the chest. Wait, Gino, where are you from? I'm from Long Island. What?

No, my brain is telling me I'm from Maplewood, New Jersey. Oh no! He's putting a gun in his mouth. No, no, no, no, no. Don't play the closing up the blood bag song, please. Honestly. I'm a cowboy. I'm a steel horse I ride.

All right, we'll see you next time. Thanks, bye. And cut audio and episode.