Comedy Bang Bang: The Podcast - Be Our Geft (Gareth Reynolds, Carl Tart, Hannah Pilkes)

Episode Date: September 22, 2025

This week, Gareth Reynolds joins Scott to talk about his eleven years in podcasting, his fear of being lobotomized, and his new podcast, Next We Have. Then, private detective The Chief returns to update us on the whereabouts of Carmen Sandiego. Next, A Girl Who Had The Craziest Night drops by to recount her escapades. And finally, we get a visit from Jimmy Buffet!Check out Gareth’s new podcast Next We Have on Apple Podcasts or YouTube! Don’t forget to check out the Comedy Bang! Bang! Action Figures at shop.figurecollections.com and go to actionfigureseller.com for international purchases. If you want more great episodes of Comedy Bang! Bang! become a subscriber at comedybangbangworld.com. We have all of the past episodes from the archives, every live show, ad-free new episodes, and original shows like CBB Presents and Scott Hasn’t Seen. Find more great Comedy Bang! Bang! merch at https://www.podswag.com/collections/comedy-bang-bang Get access to all the podcasts you love, music channels and radio shows with the SiriusXM App! Get 3 months free using this show link: https://siriusxm.com/cbb Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

I'm a comedy bang bang, bang, comedy bang, bang, comedy bang, comedy bang, comedy bang, comedy bang, comedy bang, comedy bang, comedy bang, comedy bang, comedy, bang, comedy, bang, comedy. I'm being hunted, most dangerous game style by character actor Mark Strong, please help. Welcome to Comedy Bang Bang. Hmm. Thank you to Craigie Kay for that catchphrase submission. Submitted in January of 2023. Thanks so much for that. Hope you're still alive. And welcome to Comedy Bang Bang for another week. We have a fantastic show.

Coming up a little later, we have someone who works in law enforcement. Always wonderful to talk to someone who works in law enforcement these days. We also have a girl. That's going to be a really. really fascinating. We also have, but this is, I'm bearing the lead, of course. Coming up a little later, we have legendary musician, singer-songwriter Jimmy Buffett will be on the show. That's going to be incredible. I'm a huge cheeseburger and paradise fan amongst other songs that he has, Margarita. I wonder if he does any non-food-related songs. So many questions to ask him,

this is going to be a huge honor. That'll be coming up a little later in the show. But let's get to our first gift. You know him. He's gifted on so many podcasts. He also hosts his own podcast. By the way, my name is Scott Ackerman. I don't know whether I said that or not, but that is my name. But he is the either hoft or co-hoft of three podcasts at this point in time.

I don't know if they're all still an active concern to two R. One, maybe not. Or three R. They're all an active concern. figure out the math. Yeah, once I introduce him. The podcasting question are the Dallup. We're here to help. And he has a new podcast, which we'll be talking about. I have guessed it on this thing. We'll talk a little bit about my experience. This podcast is called Next We have. Please welcome to the show for the first time, Gareth Reynolds. Hi. Gary Rift Reynolds. Thank you very much. Yes, exactly. To stay on the theme. Thank you, Scott. Yeah, you were great. We had a lot of fun when you were on, and you got a lot of great prizes, which is... I did, yes, and we'll talk about that in a second. But as great a guest as I was, I hope you will also be a great guest on this show. Well, I won't be as good of a guest as you were, but I will try. Okay. Yeah. That's all I want is your best, 110%. Absolutely, as much as one could give. Yeah, not even 100. I don't want 100%.

It's 10% less than what is possible. Exactly. I want 110 right now. Yeah, absolutely. Well, you're doing great so far, I have to say. This first part felt pretty good, and I'm excited for this next moment to see. We have a wonderful chemistry. Yeah, there's great banter so far, and I think we should keep it going. Let's talk about your past, and then we'll talk about your present.

Okay. I love gifts. But you started in this podcast game, and look, on Comedy Bang Bang, we love having podcasters. Fellow podcasters on this show? Oh my God, the fans are so excited. No, I know. They open up the podcast app and they say, a fellow podcaster is in A block. Well, yeah. You get some big names in the entertainment industry and that's cool, but wouldn't you rather see someone you've seen in this role do it on something that is very similar to how they've already done it? I am so used to seeing you with headphones wrapped around your ears. I don't know what it would look like if you were to actually act in something, so who needs it?

Yeah, no. Why transfer your talents to this big or small screen? Look, I left the Hollywood game a while ago. I won't do that. Good. And less offered, then I will jump at the chance. But as far as, you know, really being invited to anything, that doesn't happen. So it's headphones for me.

Headphones for you. And you started out, how many years ago did the Dullup start out? Well, we just did our 700th episode, which isn't an answer. No, it's not. That's not an answer to your question. It seems like you're being evasive and I can't quite pinpoint why. I'm giving it 110% and I want to point that out.

I, uh, about 11 years ago. 11 years ago. Now, this is a show by your own admission. Uh, we talked about it on a previous episode of my other show, Scott hasn't seen, where a gentleman by the name of Dave Anthony, lunatic person I've known for a long time. Correct. Uh, tells you about things in history.

Correct. And then you say, What? Well, you're having fun, and I do a lot of times go, wait, what? And then I'll do an accent. So I want to say, there's a lot. Which accent is one of the ones you still can do? Or one of the ones you're not supposed to do it?

No, it's become very limited because my skill set was in areas where I can't do it anymore. And again, I've apologized for that. This was 700 episodes ago. Your notes app is filled with apologies. God, and I mean them all. I'm very sorry. But yeah, no, my role is very much to go, that didn't happen. Really?

Did you ever say that didn't happen? And he goes, yeah, you're right. I was just making this up. I don't think that has happened. Then why say it? Yeah, I don't, well, it's just one of the, it's like I'm, you know those key chains that you just have, like, catch for you to hit a keychain and it would be like, it would make a sound effect? That's me on a podcast. I just have my few things to say.

Okay, well, I'd like to hear you try it with me sometimes, you know, if I, yeah, yeah. So you've been doing the doll up for 11 years. Wait, what? Seriously? Yeah, okay. Try that good, yeah. I mean, you're great at it. Thank you very much of this.

Wait, really? You know how in comedy there's straight man and, I guess, is there a name for the opposite of straight man, funny guy? I used to do the accent, and I won't anymore for... Yes, but is there a term for what you do like in comedy? The guy who goes, huh, what? Lucky, the non-worker, the one who sits there and just shows up. What a fun show.

You must, do you retain any of the knowledge or does it just slip out of your brain the second that the podcast ends? A lot of it leaves, but then there are the ones that stick with you that are, you know, like there was the guy who started the lobotomy and he became like a showman. He started at me. He's a doctor operating on someone? Yeah, it wasn't too long ago. I think he was in the 1900s at one point. But he, you know, he came up with the technology. Oh, he created the lobotomy.

Yes. I see. I thought you were just saying he started a lobotomy and I was waiting for the other half. So he started a lobotomy and then he was a showman. Well, that's when I jump in. Wait, what? No, but he invented the lobotomy. And then he started to do multiple.

This is one of our great scientists. This guy's amazing. This guy... Basically, he figured, like, if I take out the brain, then people won't think anymore. Well, and I think there's somewhere, if you cut the lobe, nothing happens, which is my favorite one, the one who's like, oh, no. Great little balls, cut the lobe. Wait, what? No.

And he... But then he started, like, making it a show. So he would, like, come town to town, and he would get five people up on stage, and he would kind of ice-pick multiple lobes. And then he started driving around in a car called the Labatomobile. Wait, and these were people where he found out if you cut the lobe, nothing would happen. So he would. No, no. These were people that they wanted lobotomized.

Yes, it's a roll of the dice. But when you hear he's coming to town, like, I would go on vacation. Yeah, no, I definitely. Just in case anyone is like, hey, we got a volunteer over here. Yeah, it's a little like Gallagher. You're just like, don't put me in the front. I don't like crowd work. No, and then so he became, so stuff like that.

So the Labatomobile, you were saying? Yeah, he had a cape and a cane And he drove, he like started to feel himself a lot He started to be like, I'm good Like I'm the man And then, you know, eventually people are like, you know, like everything They were like, wait, what have we been doing for the past 15 years? This is insane

Why did we like any of this? Yeah, well, all he's doing is like stabbing someone with an ice pick Yeah, and then you have relatives You're like, well, they're catatonic now And that guy, you know, he'd made his McMillian So he was sort of off Did he did, was he promising like, oh, I'll be able to fix this afterwards And then

Then the curtain goes down for Act 1, he goes, I'll be back in Act 2 to fix everyone. Then he just skips down. Car start. I love your sound effects, by the way. Oh, they're the best. Car start. Well, again, it's not, again, I don't want to say I'm just reactive.

I do a lot of sound effects, too. Car starting, man driving away. Okay, yeah, let's hear water dripping. Water is it tripping. Really good. In a cup. We've got to get a record going. I would love to.

Paul L. Tompkins and I have been working on our sound effects record for, we're up to track 14, I think. I think it would sound a little like this. Scott Ruffman and Paul Lepton. sound effects record. It's not bad. Yeah. Yeah. Something to think about.

So you, so that's stuck in your head. Yeah. And why is that? Because you, are you afraid of being lobotomized or? It's a fear. Yeah. Now that we're talking about it, it's a fear. It's on there.

There's a lot of fears. But I wouldn't like that one. Yeah. I think that one, I don't think I could give a hundred ten percent if I had that low. You know what I wonder about? They say evolution is real, right? The whole Charlie Darwin. Yeah.

Of it all? Yeah. And yet, we have to buy helmets when we ride skateboards. It's like, hey, let's make the skull the helmet. You know what I mean? I do think God gave us all a helmet. Right. But God didn't create skateboards, probably.

The devil created skateboards. And God's like, look, I gave you a skull so that it would protect you for anything that's not moving as fast as a skateboard. And then little Lou Cipher, if you know what I mean. Yeah. Seeing there going, he, he, he, he, I created a skil. It's board for you. Wait, what? Yeah, I think, well, I think that's the skateboard.

If you fall, that's God's way of saying, you know, we're good. Yeah, like Akaris, you've flown too close to the sun. Yeah. Or too fast on your board. Yeah, so it's your time. And so, uh... Do you know any skateboard tricks? Oh, yeah.

How many? I know offhand. Yeah, or if I had time to do a podcast about it and come back. I kind of wish you would prepare to the answer to this question. but okay yeah how many uh four four three that i'll talk about okay great the ollie classic that's a big i want to sort of named after that's named after john ollie is it really yeah really not oliver north who just got married congratulations oliver north friend a show getting married to fawn hall finally these two friend a show get together hmm um but uh so the ollie what uh what else do you do

the seven 20 the seven 20 That's a lot. Yeah. That's two complete turns. That's right. Wow. Okay. Not to be mistaken with the 180.

Sure. Do you do that one? I do that one too. So those are the three? Yep. Yep. So there you go. And there's a four.

You don't do a 360? Is that a move? I've never heard of that one. Seems to be like if you do a 180 and you do a 720, yeah. 360 would be natural. I don't know. I don't know.

I guess if you're accidentally messing up a 720, you may be doing. with 360, but that's not one of the ones that I've... Okay. Yeah, no, the Ali's... Can we talk off air about the one that you don't want to? Yeah, as long as we... Outside, we can. I'll have the headphones on, but... Let's go outside. Let's do it off Mike. Let's do it. Let's... Listeners, promise not to listen. Yeah, okay. All right, let's go outside.

Oh, you got a beautiful yard out here. Isn't it nice? This is really nice. You've got to come by more often. I would really love to. I didn't want to... Let's see each other socially sometime. Do you mean that? Yeah, I truly do. I would really like to do that. Yeah, in a social setting. Yes, yes.

You know, maybe some alcohol, the looseness up. I agree, I agree. And then maybe sunscreen. So I would love, I have to. I have to wear sunscreen. Of course, yeah. That's not an option. You're a fair gentleman.

Well, I mean, I. Tough but fair. Well, wait, what? No, I'm kidding. I know we're never going. No, I really am. I burn pretty badly. Yeah.

And it's a real problem. Okay, let's cut the shit. What's your, what's your other? History in my family of. Hey. What's your other trick? My other trick. Oh.

Tell me, motherfuckerucker. Jesus Christ, Scott, what are you doing? I thought you said, we were going to hang out socially. Yeah, we'll do that if you tell me this. The skateboarding? Yeah. I didn't even know you really wanted one. I thought you just wanted to get out here.

Did you? Okay, okay. Were you lying about the trick? No. You actually do a fourth one. Yes. What is it? All right.

But remember, it's not a lie. Okay. The blimp. I do a blimp. What is a blimp? That's where I get. it's so high up, I inflate, and I float for a little while, and then I come back down. That sounds freaking cool.

Well, you see why I didn't want to talk about it in there? That sounds cool as hell. Oh, look, look. Do you want to do it? Do it right here? Do you have a board? Oh, yeah, here it is. Oh, wow.

Wow, man, I wish I could do sound effects like that real sound. Yeah. Okay, and then, oh, here's your ramp right here. Hey, who built this? Oh, George Ramp. Oh, he's the inventor. Yeah, the inventor of the ramp. Yeah, okay, all right.

This is one of the original ones. Really? Mm-hmm. Yeah, it's kind of... From the 1920s. It's got a lot of, like, splinters coming out of it. Yeah, well, watch out for those. Yeah, okay.

Well, I'm not going to need it if I do the blimp. Oh, sure. Of course not. I might be gone for a minute. All right, you said up there? Yeah, yeah. You've been taking all this time to climb up to the top of the rim. I understand.

I just want to, we really should socially do something. I just want to circle back to that. Let's put it in the books. Let's pencil it in. Great, great. All right, great. Or a pen, erasable pen. Those never fully erase.

Didn't you ever find that? I always found like there was the ghost of the pen. I know. Why did they even? Well, they were trying to show us that the tech was there. One there. That was the last pen invention or penvention. I was going to say penvention.

You know. Or invention. Because that was like in the 80s, wasn't it? Yeah. They were like, hey, we got this new pen thing. Hey. And then nothing. Nothing since then.

chastised so much for what they lied. I mean, it was big pen lying, obviously. Everyone bought one. Oh, you're cool. You could only buy 10. I mean, that's far. You could only buy them in bulk. I know. Yeah. All right, you ready for this trick? I've really enjoyed this chat outside, but yeah, here I am. Here we go. All right, ready? Yeah. Huh. Do you want me to do that too? Yeah, that would great. Ah! Ah! Ah! God damn it! I'm so mad at my dad! Oh! All right. Here we go. Okay.

One, two, three. Oh, my God, he's doing it. I wish you could see this. He's doing it. He's, he's inflated. He's floating up into the air. He's going so high. Oh, no.

He's going too high. He's going up towards the sun. He's never going to be able to breathe in the atmosphere. Oh, no. Oh, no. Let me get my shotgun. Let me get my shotgun. Here, Garrett, Gary, I'll shoot you down.

Oh! Oh! Oh, my God, that was incredible. I just think I was trying to wow you so much that I... You inflated too much. I know. You shot me. Yeah, are you okay? Yeah, because it's just in a part that was full of air. Oh, thank God. It just went right through you.

Yeah, went right through me. Oh, that's so good. Here's a Band-Aid. Oh, thanks. Oh, God. Okay. Well, tell you what, let's go back inside me. Yeah, I feel bad. Start doing the podcast again. Yeah, okay, okay.

I really want to do that social thing, though. Hey, welcome back. All right. Mum's the word on that one, my guy. I will not be telling anyone about that. Nor should you. So now let's hear about your other shows. Of course, we're here to help.

Yes. Has been going for how long now? Two years? Two years. And what does this show describe it? It's a call and advice show I do with a friend of mine, Jake Johnson, and we have people calling with small problems. And this is a massive, massive success, is it not? I don't know.

It seems to be doing well, yeah. But, you know, we're not very good at solving the problems, but we sure do try. Yeah, why would anyone want advice from you? Yeah, I think that's a really fair point. I mean, there's an edge to it, which I don't love. But yes, it's a very fair point. Why would they? And, you know, sometimes we help, sometimes we don't.

And I've heard this show is just the listenership is through the roof. Oh, the numbers are... You guys are doing great. The numbers are big. The numbers are big. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine. Way higher than that. So much after that.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You shouldn't have even started there. It goes, well, yeah, yeah. I'll start at 10, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 50. Yeah, even then, I would think you could go wait. Yeah, exactly. Just even more, yeah. 20, 20, 21, 22, 23.

We don't need to count it, but I think you would be wise to start at a bigger number. The numbers are huge on this. Thank you. And now you have a new program. Mm-hmm. Thank you. Next we have. Thank you.

Next we have. Now, describe next we have. I know all about it. I was on the GD thing. Yeah. But tell our. Dumb shit listeners who don't know anything about this show. Right.

They're sitting there going like, oh, I have no idea what this show is. I'd like to court them a little bit. So I don't know if I want to frame them like that. I mean, I think they're, you know. I'm sick of them. Well, I just, I wouldn't say that. I really, I, as someone who is four or five or six. Connie Vanne has the dumbest listeners.

No, no, Scott, Scott, Scott, maybe we should go. And I hate them. Scott, let's go outside real quick. Okay. Yeah. Hey, look, I know you've been doing this for a while, but I want to talk about your listeners like that. That seems wild. They're just, they're so on my nerves right now.

I know, but you've got to hide that. Really? Yeah, of course, yeah. You're a professional podcast with three podcasts. Look, I'm sick at everyone who listens to my stuff. I understand. I hate my fans. I hate my fans.

Do you hate your, who do you hate more? Your fans are your family? Oh, my God. Because it's a dead heat for me. Yeah, I'm furious at my family. Yeah. But I really hate my family. I know the fans.

I'm so sick of them. But the point is that you lie about how much you like them. Like, that's what I do. Oh, I appreciate so. Yeah. What do you mean? I'm a sort of George Washington type. Well, he, I believe, was a pretty bad guy.

He had, well. I remember hearing about him once and doing a wait what. I really do. I think I wait a what at him. The whole wooden tea thing, if you really investigate that. Now it's even worse. Not a really good thing. All right, I'm an A-Blinking guy.

Yeah, okay, great. I cannot tell a lot. Yeah. Is that weird two presidents couldn't lie? I mean, imagine those days. You know. That's so funny. Imagine

Imagine what a president Couldn't lie Fuck, that is really good Yeah That's gorgeous Yeah, I gotta remember that Okay, yeah Remember that

But okay, let's go back in Let's do it And maybe when we get back in there Say something nice about the fans Oh, okay, yeah All right Let's go Oh gosh, you okay

Oh my God What is that? That's a fucking back Why was that sword? Ah, I fell on my sword I didn't know you had us Why do you have a sword? I mean, I've often

said I'm figuratively going to fall on my sword. Yeah, but that's... To literally fall on my sword? What are you doing? That's sticking out my back. Here, here, here, I got a Band-Aid on my side from when you shot me. Here, let me put that on this. Oh, that's better. Way better. Okay, all right. All right. Okay.

Anyway, Comedy Bang Bang has the greatest listeners in the world. I've met a few of them. I love them. I love them so much and I want you to tell them what is this show next we have. Well, I love my fans too a lot and my family. But I will say this show is, it's geared. towards the shorter attention span, which I've just sort of...

Would you say? I'm joking, of course. I'm paying attention. Do you remember what I just said? It's geared towards the shorter attention span, is what I said. I'm kind of waiting just for you to stop talking about. Okay, let me just get through this.

But it's basically a lot of games with guests. We have fun short segments. My mother appears on it a lot. Well, you know, some... You know how it is. We're all reacting to things. We involve the people who work on the show. it's very much like

a fun little family. It's a, if I can take over for you, because that sounds fucking terrible. Your show is, it's like a variety show. It is, very much so. There's games, there's little segments. Some interviews with people who are interesting, but it's really, it's quick.

15, 20 minutes segments of a few per show. When I came on, we played a fun game, which was guessing how much your producer, I believe, went to a swap meet. And we were supposed to guess the items that he purchased, how much he paid for them. Yes. And unfortunately, we didn't know that he was a psychopath and that he would pay top dollar for the worst shit. Yes. So. So, so. He didn't haggle. No. And, and they, they were on to him by the end of it because they just kept upping the prices to everything.

Well, they were probably, this motherfucker will pay anything. They're probably on a group text going like, this guy's awesome. Get him over to your booth as soon as possible. He's buying everything. So now everything that I won, the first thing I won was a novelization. of a movie water world water world that's right and now our good friend adam scott uh who by the way on our bonus bang series we've been doing uh our series great scott which is all adam scott episodes uh so he's a great friend of ours and of mine uh he collects these things these novelizations of movies yes and so i said uh that was the first thing that i won and i said oh i'm going to give this to adam and then uh you ended up giving me all the prizes about 11 things yeah you want You won a lot of them, but yeah, I did donate whatever I wanted.

You donated all of the rest of them. So I had like 11 things including a very large pot of some sort that no one could figure out what it was. We couldn't really figure out what the point was, but it was $40 or something. For him it was. For the rest of us, it would be two. But, and I promised you that I would get Adam Scott to hold all of these items. Yes. And I did.

Well, I said to you as soon as we were done, you don't need to do that. And you said, oh, no. Oh, no, I'm seeing him tomorrow. This is happening. I'm going to give them to him, and I'll get you a picture of him holding all of them. And you did deliver. Which I did deliver. And we can put that photo up on our page as well.

Yeah. As well as I'm sure it's. We've, next we have. Your landing page of your website. No, it's everything. It's by far the biggest thing that's happened on the show. Adam Scott says, thanks for all the gifts. Yeah, well, it was corroborating evidence that we have star power.

That's right. And, no, but he looked really happy. I haven't actually heard the behind the scenes of the picture, but he looked real happy. He was so happy. Oh, he was thrilled. He was holding 24 pounds worth of junk that he seemed. First, I gave him the book, and he was thrilled.

And then I said, you also have to hold all of this. He went, why? Yeah. I could tell you or you could just do it. Or we can hang out and get this out of the way. And he just did it. It was a great picture. So check out that picture.

But this is what next we have is all about, is about friends and colleagues having fun, doing these, riffing on these little things, these little games and these little segments. It's a fun show. Yes, and when, you know, when the producer goes back to the flea market or wherever he was,

we would love to have you back to play another round. I would love to come back. You were great. It was really, really fun to do. So, Gareth Reynolds is here. Next, we have Out Weekly, as well as your other two shows, which have a more sporadic release date.

They're weekly as well. Oh, yeah. It's a whole week. You're a three week. That's a whole nightmare. All right. Fantastic. All right.

Well, we have to get to our next guest. Speaking of fast-paced. Yeah. You know what I mean? Are you saying that you're moving on for me quickly? Is that what you're? No, I'm just saying like, you do a fast-paced show. I do a fast-paced show.

But sometimes I feel, if I may have. Two fast-paced shows. I know. I love that. But sometimes I feel like when you have a non-podcasting guest, it made the segment, this part maybe might be a little longer. The A-slot goes a little longer. Do you find that?

How interesting. Yeah. You haven't run the numbers necessarily, but I got to put that through the calculator or whatever we use. Let me know when we hang out. You can kind of give me the printouts or whatever, however you're going to do it. Definitely going to do that. I love to have a look at that. Let's go to her next guest.

She's in law enforcement. She's an old friend of the show. We've talked to her many times. Please welcome back to the show, Chief. From the Isle of the Balkans. Scott, I bid you adieu. Now, is that the adieu of hello or goodbye? Both.

Oh, okay. Thank you very much. I simply must leave. Oh, no, please, Chief. You just got here, please. You want to go at least one minute longer than Garrett. That was one of the longest A segments I've ever heard. So you've been tracking these, okay. Much like you've been tracking whom. Well, a certain suspect. Hoomst? A culprit. Whomst? Scott.

Say the name. Say her name. What is her name? I don't even remember what it is. Carmen San Diego. Right. Right, right, right, right, right, right, Carmen San Diego. Who's accused of what? That swashbuckling swing bat. You've been, now, you've been chasing Carmen San Diego.

All over the world. And you, you heard. She has been stealing the world's biggest and most prized artifacts. I mean, yeah, the biggest ones are usually the most prized. Exactly, Scott. You hit it on the nose. I'm stuffed with balkin breakfast. Have you ever had balkin breakfast, Scott?

I don't know exactly what the qualities of a balkan breakfast are. Peppers, salt. Just peppers and salt? That sounds disgusting, actually. Cheese. I mean... Bread, hard bread. Is the cheese just...

The bread is so hot, but it's fresh. What? Nothing. Why were you in the Balkans if you don't mind? Searching for Carmen San Diego. What she spotted there? That damn blind puller. She's a blind puller?

What does that mean, exactly? I don't know. have time to explain, Scott. I am on the case. Okay, I'm sorry, I don't mean to distract you. By the way, this is Gareth over here. Hello, Gareth. Greetings, gumshoe. Oh. Yeah, well, greetings to you. Yeah. What a

lovely breakfast, it sounds like you have. A balking breakfast? Yeah. Let's go through it. No, no, I was going to say, don't go through it again. Yeah, yeah. Hard bread. Cheese, cheese, too. Yeah, yeah. Tomatoes. Oh, no. Tomatoes. Oh, you didn't bring up the tomatoes. Yeah. The more things you say, the better this sounds, actually. And you rip the tomato your head with your hands. What?

As the Balkans do. Oh. Your bare hands or can you wear gloves? Your bare hands and a pair of bear hands. May I, you mean you're wearing a pair of bear gloves? Yes, you may. Okay, okay. That's fair, made it clear.

But you're not going to, okay, well, we can move on. You may have seen Chief, you had a television show where you were chasing Carmen San Diego. Well, in the world is Carmen San Diego. It ran on public television. No, I remember. Which Scott's president is taking away. Oh, boy. I'm so sorry, yeah, for your loss.

Is that why you don't have a show anymore? I mean, we haven't seen you around it all. Yes, they told me in 1994 that 30 years later, they would be canceling the corporation for public broadcasting and viewers like you. Did you ever get one of those tote bags? I never received a tote bag. That tote bag was $78,000. That is the donation you would have to give in order to receive a tote bag. Would you get one of those, like, opera video cassette?

or something like that. I got singing the 50s. Duke of Earl. Who was singing the 50s? The original artist? The original artist. Oh, okay, yeah. If you're going to hear anyone sing the 50s,

you wanted to be the original artist. The original artist. Or at least Seanana. They're very young bandmates. Usually the lead singer of the band is alive much longer than the backup singer. Well, I think back then during the 50s, there would be a gentleman or a lady who would start a band,

then they would get a few barely lead. folks to back them up and uh and they die first and they um so what is going on with carmen san diego these days are you she's just walking around swinging those huge gigantic normas breasts she's like a scofflaw in a way isn't she i mean she's just she's out there committing these crimes apparently yes although she's had no due process no due process what do you make no due process well i mean she you've never arrested her in order to get her due process, I guess. No, because I haven't caught her. She just floats away on those things. You've never come close. How close have you come to getting her? I've come close to coming

many times. No, no, no. I'm sorry. I think you misheard my question. Yes. How close have you come to getting Carmen San Diego to capturing her? Very close. Have you ever laid a finger on her perhaps? Oh, I've laid two fingers. And then what happened? Why was that not enough to be able to take her down? She shot up in the air and flew off. Oh. Sounds to me like she knows your Very familiar. I mean, nothing. Nothing. No, we didn't say anything.

She might have been doing a 720. Do you, do you two spend time with each other socially outside of it? No, no, it's purely a headphone relationship. Yeah, we're not even talking about doing something. And why is that door open? Oh, yeah, that door is fine. Yeah, that door's not open. Oh, Chief, you are a riot.

You're so funny. You love talking to you. I'm having the best time, by the way. Have you ever had a balk in breakfast? I really, what answer gets it to not be repeated, I guess. Do you know what that is? Yeah, yeah, I know what it is. Pepper, salt, cheese, hard bread, but it's fresh.

Tomatoes, you have to break with your bare heads. Yeah, you put some gloves on that are bare. Salt. Okay, sure. Lemon. No, I thought we were, yeah, I know what it is. Various meats. Okay.

So meats are involved in this as well. Meats are involved. Okay, yeah. The Balkans have the meats. Wow. Okay. I feel, yeah. Okay, great.

That sounds really complete. Yeah. My friend texted me something about meat the other day. What did they say? Something about when. Do you remember? Oh, wait, why would you remember? Anyway.

Scott and I are opening our Broadway show. That's right. It's called Anyway. That's what I've come here to promote. Yes. And it. opens when does it open i can't i i so many emails i've the 12th oh yeah of what of just the 12th you'll have to figure it out could be the 12th year it'll be the most exclusive show on

broadway that's right an audience of one an audience of one but we do have one comp available if you'd like to go that's gareth i would i would love to a couple what is the one ticket cost surely the overhead for a broadway 250 million dollars 250 million you only got to sell one ticket. Yeah, no, I, the business model is a bit of a Hail Mary, but I don't hate it. Yeah. Garift. Yeah. Gareft. No, sorry, that was a typo from earlier. It's Gareth. Garift. Okay. Everyone who has sat in the A slot and who has gone as long as you have all have a ticket. I didn't go that long. I really don't. I've heard people go way long. The longest time I've ever heard in that spot. Chief, no way. It was way. I should know. I travel. I've been to the ball. Don't do know. Do not bring up the

breakfast. I speak for, please, please. Look, look, Chief, Chief, we, because Gareth went so long, we do have to take a break. Wow. What I mean? That's normal. Unfortunately, we have to take a break, but can you stick around? I simply have to leave. But please, stay, stay. I get to talk to you so infrequently. We do have rehearsal left of this, Scott. That's true, but we're starring in the show as well. I didn't know that. That's why we split the 250 million. Exactly. Oh. Yeah. We're going to come right back. Gareth, you can stick around, right? Yeah, I'd love to.

For a little while longer, I hope. Oh, the full show feels good to me. I mean, I don't know. I might kick you out before the end. As much as you want me here, I'll be here. Okay, fantastic. When we come back, we're going to have more comedy bang bang, we're going to have more chief.

We're going to have more Gareth Reynolds. We're going to have everything plus a girl coming up, and remember the legendary Jimmy Buffett. Towards the end of the show, we're going to be right back with more comedy bang bang bang after this. Comedy Bang Bang, Bang, we're back. Gareth Reynolds is here, a three-show guy, as he's described himself. Yeah.

Three-a-weeker, he's said. Yeah, three-show guy, absolutely. Yeah. He's got, of course, the podcast, The Dollop. We're here to help, and next we have. Yep, that's three, baby. Do they all come out on the same day? No, different days.

That's smart. Yeah, I don't want to overwhelm people. Mm-hmm. So what are we talking? One comes out on Sunday. One comes out on Saturday. We got a, no, none of we can release. No.

One comes out. on February 29, whatever that happens? No, no, no, they're all, no, there's just weekdays. It's a Monday, Wednesday, Friday. Yeah, that's gentlemanly. What was that at the beginning there? Yeah, yeah. Is that good, or?

I can't quite sure. You know what I make that noise, I don't know why. Okay. It doesn't, okay. It's gentlemanly. I'll be honest. It doesn't sound super. I know what you mean.

I got to talk to my doctor. Yeah. I have vocal nodes that make me do that. Wow, I thought Nodes was like a thing where you couldn't be loud. Oh, is that what those are? Yeah, because that sounds like a, like a miced baby. I got to check me with my doctor. Am I annoying?

No. Speaking of annoying, Chief is here. Hey, Chief. What do you mean by that, Scott? I don't know. I'm just trying to segue. But what I will say is there's another mystery afoot. You don't say, Chief.

Oliver North has been married to Fawn Hall. That's right. Yeah, congratulations to the lucky couple. Finding love after all these years. Oliver North, she was Oliver North's secretary. That's right. In the 1980s. Oliver North's been married to the same woman since 1967, who died in November of 2024.

And I don't want you to say anything negative about it. I would never say anything negative about it. You might end this show. If I were. I'll take this show out. But, yeah, the mind reels. They met each other again, rekindled at her funeral. I think it's such a wonderful story of two people.

who were in a professional relationship and because they were in a professional relationship had no thoughts about attraction towards each other who then years and years later meet when circumstances change and suddenly a veil has been lifted from both of their eyes and they say, oh, you actually are attractive

and then they get together. It's a wonderful, wonderful story. What I can't understand is that Oliver North is 20 years older than Fawn Hall. And he always will be. Always will be. But now she's in her 60s. Gross.

Wait, that's what you don't understand? Wait, what do you mean? Why didn't he do it in the 80s? Well, I, I, well, because he was married. Wasn't that what we just the same? Who cares, Gereft? I, look, it's Gareth, it doesn't matter, okay? It doesn't matter.

But I will say, I think a 60-year-old could be attractive, Chief. Name five. Well, how old is Carmen San Diego? Well, yeah, what about you, Chief? Carmen, San Diego was a perfectly supple, 21. years old. What? But she's been around for so long. She doesn't age. The breasts are still supple. I remember you referencing that earlier. Absolutely. That knock-kneed naysayer is she never ages. What about you, Chief? Some sort of a high land. You're an older woman. Me? Yeah. I am

very old. Are you, what are you? 59? You wish that. You wish I was 59. A woman doesn't tell her age. Hmm. Okay. But if she were to, it would be Seventy-eight. 78. So you haven't lost any of your luster. The bloom isn't off this rose. The bloom is definitely not off this rose. You look great.

Definitely not off the rose toy. Excuse me, Gareft. No, it's Welsh. G-A-R-E-T-H. Look, Garifts, please stop correcting Chief. Please. No, I'm not. Okay.

How dare you correct a black woman? I know. Don't do that. Do not do that. I think you look. Don't white mansplain to Chief over here. I wasn't. I didn't even know that.

I didn't even know his chief was black. Let's go through. Let's go through some of these accents. No, no, I don't want to... I've been all over the world. Some of them are... It's kind of aged horribly. I don't want to redo that cheap.

Why don't you tell me about the Balkan breakfast? That's not a pretty interesting. Yeah, what is that? Have you ever been to North Macedonia? I don't think I've been to South, North, North, Northeast, nor West. You should go. I have been to the center of Macedonia. They have breakfast there.

They do. Okay. They eat it in the morning. Right. Pepper. Tea. So it's a balkan. Hard bread. It's the balkin.

What about salt? Salt. Meat. Lemon. Cheese. Meat. They got the meat. They got the meat.

Cheese, too, right? Cheese. And the bread is that hard? That's it. You know, my friend texted me something about meat the other day. What did they say? Wait a minute. Never mind.

Look, we have to get to our next guest. We have a packed show and I want to save time for Jimmy Buffett at the end of the show. I want to say the B slot, Phil, nice and long, too. I think everybody's having a nice long slot today. That was the shortest slot. No way! Let's get to her. This is fantastic.

This is the first time she's ever been on the show. Please welcome Girl Who had the craziest night. Hey. Hey. Boo. Did I scare you? I don't know, Gareth. Are you scared?

No, it wasn't scared at all. Chief, I'm frightened right out of my panties. Good. You have taken off your panties. Yeah. I wish you would put them back on. By the way, no, keep them off. I'm not here to make things comfortable.

You heard the woman It's so nice to meet you, girl, who had the craziest night Yeah, I bet you want to know how I am But you want to get in this thick skull Get in the side of this Tootsie Pop Yeah, I wouldn't mind just figuring out what makes you tick How do you think I am? Why don't you guess?

I'd like to see you trying I'm using defensive You don't seem happy, a little aggressive Yeah, a little agitated But I imagine that has to do with your experience I've seen shit you can't even believe Try me I mean this guy I'll probably say

Huh? What? Well I've seen shit that makes your nightmares Feel like dreams Makes your nightmares feel like PBS Makes your nightmares feel like Clifford The Red Dwar What would my dreams seem like? Your dreams

Your dreams Would be bad too I'm a little Wait so the reality is Clifford The Red Doe Times a constant struck. I didn't even know I got here and you get to put in my invisible line.

Maybe you visited Chief's friend Bill Cosby. It's a little joke. Obviously, if that happened to you, I feel terrible for you and I don't want to joke about that. But tell us, you had a crazy night? Yeah, at the craziest night. But you guys once you hear my record, once you guys hear my music, it's going to change

it. Oh, wait, you're a musician? Well, yeah, of course. Once you guys hear it, everything's going to make sense. Oh, okay. I didn't. I mean, I guess I didn't. that's not on your bio here. You can't tell I'm a musician? Not really. I mean, you don't have any musical instruments.

Yeah, but I got this instrument right here. It's called my voice. It sounds a little... I'm sure you really step it up when you record. It sounds a little shaky. That would be the only reason why I would say maybe.

It's not the most pleasant listen. I don't got nodes. I got throat goblins. I got goblins so deep. They're tangled up in there. I got goblins at war. Because everything inside leaves at war. Someone's been eating a balk in breakfast.

Oh, I loved salt. I don't do lemon, I do peppers, jalapinos, red peppers, and then you can't imagine when it comes out, it's not pretty. It comes out the other end, you mean? You be the judge. So, so you're- You guys want to climb on the roof? Not especially. Okay, I guess cheap does.

Climb on the roof. You want to get on the roof? Yeah, let's get scared. I mean, this is a pretty tall building we're in right now. I think I might be a little bit scared. Let's see. You can jump in the pool. I think we all could

If we wanted to But it's kind of a cold day You can dive in the pool I hear it's only four feet deep Oh my skull crushing That's what I'm talking That's my lower back tattoo Skull crushing is your lower back

Let me look at this bad boy Just the word skull crushing Wow Out of context Skull crushing and soul crushing Because once you hear my music We never can go back Did you bring any of your music

Is that where you're here to talk about? Honestly I thought you were here to talk about this crazy night that you had, but, uh... Shit, I saw last night you can't put in school books. I'm not looking to do that. Could we hear it on a podcast, perhaps? I saw last night you can't even put in words. You can't even put into sounds, but it's close to this.

It's one sound. Yeah. Would it help to maybe say a little bit of what happened last night? Because it feels like you're... Well, once you hear my record, that's all you're going to need in here. So we hear the record, and then we know... You made the record the... since last night?

Yeah, I do a quick turnover. Okay. I got a studio in my studio apartment. Okay. That's not, I mean, it's not usually the sign of quality. Like, I just did this in the last hour, you know, but I, but sure, yeah. My music's so rogue. I got nine mixtapes I put on Spirefights since two hours ago.

Wow. I need to get my membership back. I'll give you a discount code. It's called Scone Crusher 69 69. I'll remember that. I will remember that. Not in a sex way. That's my area code.

69, 69. You're from the Balkans. That's right. I love their breakfast. But I don't eat breakfast. I eat them. I eat them. I crush them up and I'd swallow them whole.

Well, let's hear some of this music then. I guess that'll explain what happened to you last night. Is that... I'll give you a little tease. Okay. I mean, you give us the full thing if you want. It's 14 minutes long. Just a taste.

Just a taste. Hey, because I collaborate. Actually, it's 32 because I collaborated with fish. Oh, okay. Oh, the band? No. Oh. The actual...

The fish. The fish. Marine life? Yeah, it's marine life. Okay. Well, yeah, let's do the non-fish part and maybe a sample. Yeah, sure. Yeah, and maybe just like 30 seconds.

Yeah, not a lot so that everyone goes out and buys it. You guys definitely want to hear it? Yeah, yeah, Chief. I mean... I would love to hear it. Are you sure? Absolutely. All right.

Give me a count in? Do we need that for you to press play on this thing? Yeah, just going to give me a count? Before I give you a count. I need to know the tempo of the limit. It's like, I know, it's a weird. One, two, three, four.

You think, you know, a person, but you don't. I was with my friend, and I was doing it twice. How many? Twice. Twice. I mean, that's just a taste. Oh, sorry, there's more. Oh.

Oh. Do we need another count? The same tempo? And it's twice as counts. Twice as counts. Okay. One, two, three, four. Girls are on the goal with their friends.

I love my life to the very end. I'm with my girls in Christ and all. I love my life and Jehovah's Wimbus. Okay. I mean, that was interesting. Yeah. You guys ever considered Jehomba's Wimbus? Jambas Wimbas.

Is that related? The religion. Yeah. Related. Is it really? I guess you've traveled so you know these things. I've traveled. Yeah.

You familiar with Jehomba's Wimbun? I do know the book of Jehomba's Wimbers. Tell us more. That's a book. Wait, I thought you knew about it. I'd like to hear from her. You sure? She had a crazy night.

Yeah. I had a night you wouldn't believe. I had a night that there was so much fire. They said, they said, call it ambulance, but I said, let's burn. Let's let me burn on the ground. I mean, honestly, it sounds really interesting. I kind of wish you. would tell us about it. I mean, the song...

I got like 35 vines of it if you guys want to see. Uh, no. You could just you know, off the cuff tell us about it. Honestly, your music, your music was interesting. All right. I don't normally listen to a cappella music, uh, necessarily. Oh, then you shouldn't have come to my college. Oh, I don't know what that means.

I was in, I was in a lot of acchapal groups. Oh, yeah. I didn't, no, I didn't go to college with you. I don't know if there was some sort of confusion about that. Oh, you rubbing it in that I didn't get my bachelor's? Just my associates. No, no. I Congrats. I mean, that's more than I got. Oh, really? You think that's great. That's less than you don't go college. I went to college, but I never picked up any actual degree, and yet here I am.

A successful person in show business. Dreams really do come true. I went to University of Texas, Rio Grande Valley. Congratulations. Did you graduate, Chief? I didn't. I showed up to the graduation, and they said, get out of here. Oh, so you just went that one day. Yes. Oh, okay. Yeah, you got to clarify that kind of thing.

I don't know if that count. Yeah. Which college did you go to? Girl. None. None. None. Couldn't afford.

Well, I got my associates, but I don't know my bachelor's. I didn't want a piece of paper because the government. Okay. The government. Yeah. We brought the government into this. You seem to have a very interesting, conflicting worldview. You bring up Christ in the government.

Jehovah's Wimbus. Jehovah's Wimbus. And tell us a little bit about yourself. How did you get to this place? You can leave out the details of last night I mean what happened last night You never recovered back from that What happened last night

It was so dark and so bleak That it was like a cave That you can't escape from It sounds like the inside of this Tootipop How many licks What happened before? You've bitten into it It was a new Tootty Pop

And it seems like You lost a filling when you did it Oh I don't care about cavities It's just straight blood And glass in my mouth right now Yeah What were you going to say? Gariff? Well, I just, Gareth, I just was going to say, did you, what led you to this before

last night? Forget about last night. What led you to the events of last night? How were things before last night? Oh, I was at a Briss. A bris? As a Jehovah Vimbas? Yeah, well, I live a really multicultural life. As do I. Yeah, yeah. Tell me more. Well, I saw you at the Briss. I was there. Thank you for bringing the bulk of purpose. Absolutely. I never show up to a party, Handed. I would have eaten it, but I was on 10 hour old. And because it was a brisk, I didn't leave empty handy. Did you see the snip? Absolutely. I was under the bottom and I caught it. Is that what you mean? You left with the tip? Yes. Okay. They don't need it anymore. Just the tip. That's how I'm doing it. I believe the moyle, he has that funny joke about keep the tip. And then he like

throws it to a lucky person in the crowd. And you know who that lucky person was? Great thing's gum shoot. Oh, that's right. Your catchphrase. Have you said it until now? No, I'll say. I said it to you, Gareth. Yeah, but not on air, I think. You said it to me a bunch before. It's all you were saying to me before we started, actually. I didn't want to blow it. In the green room.

One time I got a mikva. You got a what now? A mikba. A mikba? What is it? Holy Water. Oh, okay. I converted to Judaism.

Oh, okay. That's great. Thanks. Yeah. So is that what happened last night? you, that was related to that? No, what happened last night, there was bones, there was Skittles, there was bumbles, they were freaking out and they were like, they were like, get inside and I was

like, I'm not going to do that. I don't know what bones are bumbles. I'm in a, I'm on the four or five freeway. I'm doing donuts like you can't even believe. Doing donuts on the 405? I mean donuts doing donuts, doing donuts on a four or five freeway? You mean in the car or do it? I'm doing it eating donuts.

You're eating donuts in the car. Oh, you're eating donuts in the car. Doing donuts. So you're eating donuts on the 405. Are you eating donuts and doing donuts? I'm eating donuts, doing donuts on the 4-05 freeway. I got so many donuts in my face. I can't even see in front of me.

I'm blind by donuts fast and the furious style. I'm running down the street. That was last night. That was freaking... Okay, so that, what time was this? After the bris. After the bris, so probably... I mean, that's usually an after-0-3-3-30?

It's like 6.30? So, yeah, 6.30 or so? It's like 1 p.m. moderate traffic. What time were you in bed? Probably like 8 or 9 p.m. last night. Very reasonable. This doesn't sound like a crazy night. You went to a bris.

You ate some donuts on the freeway. You woke up, watch Good Morning America. Went to a bris. Trove those speed limit eating some donuts. Got home. Hadling cuisine. Guy in bed. Pray to your home.

Bimbus. I don't know that the lean cuisine's going to help after eating all those donuts. Yeah. Okay. What you're saying about me? I thought this is a side. I'm not commenting on your body at all. No, it's a guy feeling eating it.

Although I'd like to. Which flavor? I had the lasagna special surprise. There's a surprise inside Like a toy? Yeah, there was a wedding ring A wedding ring, congratulations! Are you sure?

Are you involved with someone Who's maybe proposing to you? I don't get married, the government. Oh, yeah. Okay. I don't believe in that stuff. Time's a construct as is love. Oh, who's in love your congratulations?

There's capitalism. You're all over the place. Wait, what? I mean, it applies right now. In God's name we pray I'm in Murray. Okay, yeah. So it sounds like a pretty, at eight evening for you you just no i was freaking freaking freaking freaking freaking freak my ass off

woke up at 820 study 810 roll over in the morning yeah she slept for over 12 hours 12 hours 12 and you've made an album too is yeah maybe recorded nine sign clouds sound clouds went to gold's gym what did you do there pumped pumped did you listen to your album while you pumped listen to my music made sure all the levels were good like you do yeah yeah yeah i mean We listened to some of it. The levels seemed fine. Yeah, the levels were not an issue for me. For an a cappella, no instrument.

One, two, three, four. I'm so happy to be here with my girls and my guys and my ladies and I love of my life. And I'm a two and it twice. Boom, boom, boom, bum, my leg, your job. I like that one. Yeah, I don't love that one, too. The levels were not a problem. Levels were great.

It's not really my style of music. I don't even know what I would call that style of music necessarily. What would you call it? That was a duet with the girl that sings, put your records on. There were two people in there? Oh, Corinne Bailey, Ray. Oh, I freaking love that song. I don't think we heard her voice.

Did we stop it before she came on? Should we hear her? Do you have any with her? No, that was both of us. I was in the background doing stuff like, oh, that was her? Oh, okay. Yeah, I guess I didn't recognize your voice.

It's been a minute since I've heard one of her songs. You didn't hear me to it again. One, two, three, four. Three little goose and the art thing when they're being a boom. I don't remember Corinne Bailey Ray of making so many panting noises. Scott, when's the last time you heard of Corinne Bailey Ray, so?

Honestly, it's been since the 2010s, is sure. Jeez, from London. Okay. Fantastic. Have you ever had a British breakfast? I have, yeah. Yeah, it's very similar to a Balkan in some ways. Name it.

Name what is on a British. Say his name. Say his name. Say his name. Say his name. Say it's name of the foods. Yes. Well, there's toast.

There's baked beans. There's eggs. There's hash browns. There's some sausage. Talk about the bangers. There's bangers. There's a lot of bangers. too. A lot of bangers.

Bangers. Is the bread hard? Bread? The bread? No, it's soggy. Everything in England is soggy. I don't think that's fair. It's so, it rains all the time.

It rains constantly. It's hard not to get it on the food. They don't use refrigerators. They keep their food on the stoop. Well, but I mean, you're talking about, first of all, I've been there a couple times. I've never seen stoop food. Oh, he's been there. Oh, you've never had stoop food.

Depends on what time you're walking. You're just walking down these streets and, like, there will be, you know, plates of food just on every stoop around lunchtime. I'll concede that. But while it sounds like a strange breakfast, the Balkan breakfast also sounds very, you know, it's... Gariff, how dare you? Well, no, I didn't mean anything.

No, Chief, I didn't mean anything by that. I really... Why are you taking such offense? Are you English? I am not English. I would never claim to be. Okay. Well, I mean...

I mean, right before the show in the Green Room, you did introduce yourself as the English law enforcement officer. The English law enforcement officer is the film that I'm right. writing. It's a part two of the English patient. Oh, okay. This makes sense. It's a mixture of the English patient and police academy. Oh, my God. Is Hightower going to be in this? He is. Michael Winslow himself. Making all types of sounds like. Making sounds like. What that sounds very familiar? Tackleberry? Yes. Can I get it on blueberry? Absolutely not. It only comes on DVD. Okay Only slightly out of date Got to buy one of those Standard definition

All right Well look Girl who had the craziest night I mean It sounds As nights go It doesn't sound Incredibly crazy

But No it's crazier Than you could Ever believe Who wants to buy my record It's I only take Doge Oh

I don't have any Doge I don't have any Doge I'm all out of Doge Chief You got any Doge? I have no Doge Oh Oh, we're a doge-less podcast today.

I'll get some doge and definitely. Yeah, get some doge because I've got to get my Uber home. Yeah, I don't know if I'm going to be able to get it that quickly. Yeah, by the time you need to Uber home, because we only have one more segment. But you know what? You're a musician. Yeah. We have a musician coming up in C-block here.

So is a musician going to pay me in songs? I don't see how that's going to help me. You could swap songs, maybe. That's a good bartering system. In the Balkans, they swap music. And then, you know, for your Uber, you could have your Uber drive you home. home and then you say you know what i'll drive you home oh we could do it like burning man where our currencies our music i you know what i bet we could get a ride home for her i really i i i'll

just call my sister okay great yeah okay that seems that sounds perfect actually that would have solved all of our problems oh yeah probably walk there it sounds like so we're gonna have to walk like 40 yards uh 40 yards is not that much some people do that in four seconds yeah it's like 84 outside some people i mean well look we have You have to take a break, but, oh, and Gareth, do you have to go, right? Yeah, I actually do have to get going. Okay. But, hey, would you hit me up?

I really want to do the social thing we're talking about. What are your numbers? One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten? It's all that sort of rearranged. Rearranged? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, I'll figure it.

You know what I'm talking about? Yeah, I know exactly. Yeah, yeah. Okay, that'll be great. All right, we're going to take a break. When we will have more chief, we will have more of the girl who had the craziest night, but this is such an exciting time for comedy, bang, bang, We have Jimmy Buffett, legendary singer-songwriter on the show.

We'll be right back with more Comedy Bang-Bang after this. Comedy Bang-Bang, we are back. Garif Trenald's had to go, but his shows, next we have The Dallop, and we're here to help our weekly, apparently on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays. He takes Tuesdays and Thursdays off, I think, which is nice. Recovery days. Recovery for, yeah, yeah, oh, my gosh. After podcast,

Absolutely. You must rest the muscles. That's right. The throat muscles. That's right. Chief is here as well. Am I? Oh, am I, Scott? You are and you're still on the hunt for... I'm still on the hunt for that cumbering computer girl, Carmen San Diego. That's right. Yeah. What are you going to do if you catch her? Oh, I'll tell you, Scott. I'm going to tie her up. I'm going to chain her to the wall. I'm going to spread honey all over her and release fly. eyes in the room. Okay. It seems like it's the Song of the South, which I haven't seen, of course.

Wait a minute. But, I'm going to spread honey and butter all over her body. Okay. And place soggy British bread right at her feet. Okay, yeah.

Which I will clean thoroughly. The feet or the bread? The feet. Okay, great. You know, my friend texted me something about meat the other day. What did they say? Never mind.

I'll tell you later. We also have the girl who had the craziest night. Sorry, British Bread is the collab I'm doing with Adele. British bread. When you say Adele, do you mean Adele computer? Yes, that's correct. I'm doing it on the Dell computer. Okay, cool, yeah.

This sounds really good. Well, look, we've been hyping it up for the past two segments. We have to get to him. This is so exciting. I'm such a huge fan. Cheeseburger in Paradise, Margaritaville, all the rest of his songs. These are the songs that our next guest, who is a. legendary singer-songwriter has created.

We're going to ask him all sorts of questions about his process, about his singing, the fact that, according to Wikipedia, he passed away a few years ago. We'll clear all that up. Please welcome to the show for the first time, Jimmy Buffett. Let me just open this door.

Hello, all right, then. All right. Wait a moment. Hello, Mr. Buffett. I guess I didn't realize you were a... It's like when you listen to the Rolling Stones, you're like... Sorry. Oh, my gosh, who's that American woman singing?

But then you find out it's this British guy named Mick Jagger. It's actually James Buffet. But Jimmy to my friends. What? Jimmy Buffet? Yes. Caterer to the stars. Yes.

You're not Jimmy Buffett, the singer-songwriter? No, no. I believe he's passed on, hasn't he? Oh, wait, so his Wikipedia page was correct? Yes, Jimmy Buffett. is dead. As a doornail? Yes, as a doorknail, unfortunately.

Made my life a lot easier when he went, though. I'll say that. So fucking stupid. Yeah. So stupid. No, it was a stupid mistake. Scott, I'm going to cover you in the same, honey, that I'm going to cover Garmin, San Diego. Will you give me the same soggy bread?

Yes, and I will clean your feet. Oh, sorry, if I missed something. Scott's got a weighted blanket. Oh. But it's great to be here to talk about all the buffets I've done all over. the world for all of the stars, some royals. I guess we could do that. I mean, I'm sorry, I had

10 pages of questions for Jimmy Buffett here. Mark, I could do some of those as well. Oh, yeah. Yeah, go on. How'd you write Margaritaville? Oh, oh, gosh. I just Killed a hobo.

Really? Yeah. I'll be honest. I can't posture as it too. Ask me another one. I think it could work. How's to write cheeseburgers in paradise? Oh, I drowned a white. A wife? Yeah. Sorry.

Yeah, I'm like it. Yeah. I don't think you can answer any of these Jimmy Buffet. No, sorry about that. But Jimmy Buffet, James Buffet. You sound like an interesting person. Oh, fascinating. I think you're going to be, I think you'll be happier that I'm here than Jimmy Buffett.

You said you're a caterer to the stars? Yes, I'm in town for the Emmys. Oh, did you cater the Emmys? I did, yes, but not one of the main ones. Oh, side. Like, what do you mean when you, you like? You know, you see the different echelon of all the stars and I was sort of. I've castigated to one of the smaller side Emmys, sort of...

The side Emmys. Yes, exactly. I haven't heard of the side Emmys. Well, they're doing the big one. Sure. And that's great. And I love those. And those are big stars.

And I, you know, but I work for a sort of smaller, smaller known quantities. Oh, okay. But I was in town of the air. Well, that sounds great. But you were in town. Yeah, in town, yeah, doing the whole thing. Tell us about some of the stars that you've catered for. Oh, gosh.

I was doing... Do you know? Jonathan Taylor Thomas Yes From home improvement He's awesome Troubled child star He's always a big problem

Yeah he was there Allegedly No he really is No but he was there He was at the show At the side Emmys And then he was at the after party We just had a great time

Cool Yeah so there's a lot of people there Who are just You know side stars Smaller star Yeah I mean that's cool Yeah it was great Look, we all knew his name, right?

Yeah, exactly. Yeah, he was there. Cool. Yeah, and it was pretty much him. Oh. Last night was, yeah. Was it his, wait, was it his party? Well, sort of.

He's not, he's in between. Why are you shouting? Can I ask? Am I shouting? That's my thing. Oh, sorry, I could take it down a little bit, Chief. I apologize. No, that's all right.

I just, I'm excited to be here. Yeah, I'm excited. Were you at his house? Yes, I was at Jonathan Taylor Thomas's house. So, but it wasn't his party. It wasn't his party. It was my party that I was putting on for him. And we had a big buffet.

And I do all big buffets. Jimmy Buffet, James Buffet. I see. So what are, I guess if that's the only star that you've been around, I guess we'll segue to your buffets. Tell us about your buffets. Oh, I've worked all over the world for loads of people for a long time. Oh, okay. Yeah.

Like, like, I did Sean Connery's buffet. Sean Connery's buffet. Yes. He's huge. He was a big star. Listen to this. Bond, James Bond. shaking not a sturt.

Yeah, he really, yeah, it's very good, yeah. Very good. Did he do that when you were? No, no, he was not. He didn't like that sort of thing. So you did do it and he didn't like it? Exactly, yeah, did it often, actually. Okay, and he hated it, yeah.

Got it, got it, got it. So we did, I did, I've done his, I've worked for royals. Royals. So which royal? Because we have a guest, Byron Deniston, who is a royal water. He'd be fascinated with all this. Oh, yeah. Well, I'm always just to fly on the wall, you know.

I mean, I just set up behind the walls, actually, most of the time. Like, in the walls. Is that right? He's hiding out, usually. Yeah, no, so I'm just putting the food out there, but I don't ask a lot of questions. I've worked for the Finnish royal family. Oh. I've worked for the Dutch royal family.

Okay. I've worked for the Macedonians. Oh. I've worked. Have you ever had a Balkan breakfast? Oh. Have you ever catered a box and breakfast? I have, yes.

Do you know what's in that? Yes. Obviously, you do you cater to it. Yes, it's a bit difficult, honestly. It's a, I don't. A bit simple, to be honest. Oh, really? Oh, okay.

Excuse me. Name it. Say its name. Say its name. Say its name. And say it's ingredients. All the ingredients? Oh, gosh, it's a bunch of hodgepodge.

We'll start you off. Salt. Salt's a big player. It's mainly salt. Hard bread. Yeah, but it's fresh. They're always bragging that it's fresh bread. But it's hard.

It's hard. Tomato that you squeeze with your bare hands. Are you all right? Is she all right? I think she's all right. You got to hear music to really hear. You guys mind if I nuke this linguine? Yeah, go ahead.

Yeah, I think the... What flavor is it? This one's soggy peas with a cider hard... That's going to stink the place up. That's okay. We only have about 15 more minutes left on the show. You guys got... It's 25 minutes, I got to heat it.

That's fine. You can stay 10 minutes after it. I work in the food business. 25 minutes. It's way too long to something like that. To nuke something? Yeah, that's far too long. Is it really too long?

I think so, yeah. Oh, okay. She put two quothals in the... plastic. The longest thing you've ever cooked in a microwave. The longest thing duck. Duck. How long does a duck take? Duck takes about two and a half hours to be cooked. In a microwave? Yeah, because you can

have duck raw. And you don't want to do it or you I don't know what you're saying. You can't have duck raw. You can have duck raw. You can have everything raw. No, you shouldn't. Oh, okay. You can't have it raw, though. Too late. I'm just trying to. Oh my God.

Got a duck with my bare hands. mention the meat? Are we back to the Balkan? My friend texted me about me the other day. I don't understand. Yeah, it's all right. So tell us about these buffets.

Do you do like specialized buffets depending on the star? Yes, it depends on what they want. So if someone, let's say I'm dealing with someone who's a soap opera star. Okay. Right. Let's say I'm dealing with someone

who's a soap opera star. Oh, okay. Yeah, so I want Lucci. All over. Yeah, so something like that, right? I'll sort of work in a dramatic fashion right oh okay yes like the the manner in which you're working build the drama throughout the buffet what does that mean so you start off there's no plates okay that's a crisis oh meaning you

didn't bring any plates well there's none there okay and then as they go further down the line do you do you have a scene where like you're saying to susan lucci or whomever it may be exactly oh no there's no there's no plates oh okay and then she'll come up to me and then i'll say wait a minute the plates were here all along. Okay. And then they're there. And then they're there. And then it's mostly just macaroni and a few other things.

Okay. Yeah. I mean, do you clue them in at the end of the evening? Like, oh, there were plates and we're just doing this because you're a soap opera star. No. So you just seem inept. Well, let's say it's an action star. Oh, okay.

All right. Susan Lucci. All right. They do donuts with donuts in the street. What was that? They doing donuts in the street. All right. Yeah.

How much time we have on this soggy piece? by the way. 1824. 1824. Love that show, 24. Sure. Not show. Love that number 18.

Keeper Sutherland. You know what I mean, Chief. Absolutely. I'm sorry, I don't understand. What was that? Carmen San Diego is a highland. That's what they call inside joke. So, okay, so an action star.

So say I'm an action star, right? Someone big, like a... Sean Connery. Okay, great. We start off, there's no plates. Okay. Right? Plot developing.

Same thing. Same sort of thing, right? He comes up. Do you say, oh, no, there's no plates? There's no plates. What are we going to do? He's highly motivated, right? Motivated to what?

Find the plates. Oh, he wants to find plates. Well, of course he would. He's got a buffet. I'm sure he has plates at his house. Well, he's not allowed to use those ones. Is that part of the rules? Yes, I've taken them.

So it's a real what's going on. Okay. And then as he moves on, And I say, uh, there are actually plates. They're in here somewhere. And then it's just kind of rolls and macaroni and things like that. So this is like a murder mystery party, but for plates? Well, it's more of an action movie, really.

Have you ever seen The Rock? Uh, the action star? Yeah. He's in Fast and Furies. Yep. Yep, that ties it all together, in my opinion. You ever seen O Rock? Ah, sure.

Shit goes hard. You guys mind if I open the mic? I got to add my trow. Yeah, sure. open the microphone or wait a microwave it's got a real smell to it whichever thing you want to open

just go ahead got a real smell she shortened it to Mike yeah that was a bit straight got a lot of cabinets and torrent I've never thought about that

microphone kind of has cornered the market in shortening to Mike yeah other than Michael other than Michael you can't really do it

with any other word that starts with Mike Michael what are you doing were you doing a Knight Rider that was my impression of all my garden

where's Michael Oh, that's home alone. Why would Paul McCartney say Michael? Michael, she's mine. Oh, okay, that's right. The duet. The duets, yes. Did you ever work with him, Michael Jackson?

Oh, I did actually, yeah. What sort of thing would you plan for him? Well, I worked with Michael when he was at his peak. Oh, okay. So, 1983? Yeah, exactly. Right around there when things were really going well. Wow.

And so what I thought is, I thought, all right, let's make this interesting. Okay. We can really cater to that. this towards his strength. Sure, yeah. Start off, no plates. No plates. And he comes in, and he's curious

where the plates are. And it's just very, it sort of starts it off on the right tone. Do you understand? I, no, I understand. I guess what I don't understand is are you like some

one-trick pony with the plates thing? I mean... The plates is a big part of what I do. Do you advertise as like the plateless caterer? Well, I cater towards every event specifically. I see. Maybe you advertise as the plate full caterer,

and then it's a surprise when you don't have any? Well, I wouldn't want to tip my hand too much because every event's different. Why are you shouting? I'm really not trying to. I'm really not trying to. Michael. I'm really not trying to.

Michael. I had to give you to try. The girl is mine, Michael. Michael. Michael. Michael. No, you don't get to do it. Why?

Yes, kid. Why? William Daniels from the graduate Was the voice of Kit And from Magnum Pia And from Boy Meets World That's right Oh yes

What a career Did you ever work with him I did the youngest Savage I absolutely did yeah Catered a number of events of him One of them is graduation Oh for the for not Fred Savage But the Ben

Ben Savage Yeah he didn't Run for office recently He sure did But could have done so much If he'd just been given a chance Just one Yes just one

The thing about politicians, like, you have to win in order to do all the stuff you... I've done a lot of political events. Oh, really? Oh, absolutely. Okay, like what? Well, I do... Careful. I don't know what.

I'm not affiliated with any party. Oh, good. No. Your own parties. Well, my... Exactly. I do parties for... That's quite good there, friend.

Yes. But what I'll do is I'll make sure, like, let's say it's a Republican event. Okay. We'll start off. Yum. Let me guess. Sorry, that's because you're eating... Stofer's with me.

It's only 10 minutes through. I like it when it's thud. And it's elite cuisine, I thought. Why'd you put it in for so love? I'm doing a UK breakfast. Nice and saggy. Hey, what? Okay.

So let me guess. No plates? No plates. So they show up. Just a lack and an absence of plates. What are they going to put the little stacks on? I guess they make their hands? Well, that's the only option.

What do people do before plates? I believe they're off rocks. Just put it on, like, flat rocks? They put it on a flat rocks? They'd put it on a flat rock. Yeah, sure have, yeah. It's great, yeah. Lost a lot of weight.

Yeah. Yeah, you know why? Why? No plates. No plates. Yeah, I worked one of his things. Okay, that's so interesting. Yeah, if you want to lose weight, if you, like, don't do these crazy fad diets.

Just throw away all your plates. Get rid of them. Yes, exactly. That's very good. Use your thumbs. Yeah, well, I don't know if that's. Opposable thumbs. Yeah, I'm not sure what that.

Yeah, of course. Yeah. The spork of the hand. Mm-hmm. Yeah, right. Sorry, I'm for sure about that. But, yeah, no plates. And then when they show up, they've got a lot of questions.

Sure, like, where are the plates? Where are the plates? They're furious. Right? They're fast and furious. Well done. And then I sit around and I say, oh, gosh, it would be great if there was some plates, right? And we've got, like, bread rolls, we've got macaroni, things like that.

They can make sandwiches out of that. Yeah. And then it's a bit of a mystery for them. A macaroni sandwich. Nothing better. A lot of carbs. Now, look. Load up.

Before I run 40 yards and four seconds? Yeah. Four point two seconds. It's quite a distance. But yeah, so that's the buffet style of that one, yeah. I mean, it sounds great. But if it's a Democratic event, obviously, it's very... Yum.

Are you still eating that linguine? You guys mind if my sister comes into peeve? Yeah, whatever. I mean, as long as you get a ride after that. I don't want to be driving. She's going to be here a while. Okay, that's fine. She drank a lot of catering.

Why? What? Truck meat. She has a track meat later? Boy, she'll be here in four seconds, it sounds like. She just got her permit. She got her permit. She's a year older than me, 16.

Wait, so she's going to drive in this. You're 15? What? She's going to drive in this track meet? What is it? It's not really, it sounds like an automotive race. She's going to drive through the 400 meter touch. Yeah, I don't know.

That's, see. I think she'll be disqualified. I don't know. I think there's nothing in the rulebook about it. Just show up with the car. You're allowed to drive those. Yeah. Yeah.

To show up with the car one day. 40 yards in 4.2 seconds. Oh, here she is. Hey. Oh, hi. I got a piece of all about insulin machinery. Oh, yeah. Use the, use the bathroom if you don't mind.

Kink, think, think, think. I'm wearing my lupitons. You see those high heeled lupiton? That's wild. What's the sound. Fantastic. Well, you know, I got to say, Jimmy Buffet. Yeah, James, yes.

James Buffet. Yep. You know what? I didn't have high hopes for your segment, but. No one did. Yeah, but you're fascinating. Well, listen, it's quite, I mean, we're talking about 45 years of doing this now, so there's lots of stories. When you love what you do, though, it doesn't feel like work.

I'd love to come back. I don't think so. Oh. But I'll tell you what, we're running out of time. We only have time for one final feature on the show, and that is, of course, a little something called plugs. Oh. You got something to plug, everything new, everything you've ever done, everything everywhere. All that one is chaos and chaos.

on yelling scotty i keep pockets been jelling new book new shirt new shoes new shell ready to sell i just made something bad now i just make something forever i just make something bad again again All right. That was Plug It Forever by Micah E. Wood. That was good. It feels like you're abusing the time a lot. I mean, we've given you, though. We give you a minute so you don't do 46 seconds like that was. We give you a minute so you, like, come in at 30 seconds. You know what I mean? Do we need to shorten this? I like that one. Yeah, I loved it. I just, at 23 seconds, I was like, oh, it must be over. And it was like, no, it's only halfway through at that point. Well, according to my research. That song would have been in perfect time if the A segment hadn't gone as long as it'd

That's a good point. We had plenty of time for a full minute if the A segment Sorry, James Buffet. We had a guest who really abused his time privileges here. The A-oh, you mean you started off? Yes, yes. You were in C block. He was in A-block and just, like, ran so long.

Oh, the energy in here was still very, very vibrant when I came in, so I wouldn't worry about that one bit. Interesting. Hey, let him cook. But you cook because you are a caterer. So what do you have to plug? Well, on behalf of your A-block guest, I've got a couple things. Did he give you some plugs to?

Yeah, well, I just found a sheet here. Look, if you want to book me, you could go to jimmybuffet.com. That's where I am. He's got a few podcasts. I think you've mentioned that, and also is recording a special. Did Jimmy Buffett only get dot-org? October 4th in Chicago, and you can go to his website, which is garethrenalds.com. What was your Jimmy Buffet question?

Jimmy Buffet, though. What about him? Did he only get dot org? Like you got Jimmy Buffet. He was just a bit of a musician. Yeah, yeah, yeah, wouldn't worry. Garith Reynolds.com for him. Oh, Garithranos.com for the South of God.

And Jimmy Buffet for booking me. Dot com. Is it confused? I feel that's pretty straightforward. I think it's pretty straightforward. Some sort of show in Chicago I heard. Correct. I wasn't listening.

Love that. And Chief, what do you have to plug? I love podcast. And I love getting them shut down if I don't like what they say. But this one, I do like what it says. Okay, what is it? The name of the podcast is the flagrant ones. Oh, I've heard about this.

By Hayes, Davenport, Sean Clements, and Carl Tart. It's on the Hollywood Handbook, Patreon. Patreon.com forward slash Hollywood Handbook. Okay. I have a question. Do they ever drop the act? I still don't know. Okay, interesting.

Also, if you like the Soprantos, Carl Tart, and Lamar Woods, host the show called XOXO Bada Beans, where they are watching every episode of the Suppranteau. And this is a spinoff of their exo-Xo Gossip Girl show. Gossip Kings. And apparently you were unavailable. It's all over the trades. I did.

Oh, I was unavailable for the Sopranto show the other day. You simply must come on. Because they wanted me to do it on a weekend and, uh... Oh, excuse me. Wow. Your weekends are so busy. Well, I do have a child now. Whom?

You got to come by the house. We have to hang out socially, chief. Let's hang out socially, please. We have to do this. And a girl who had the craziest night, what do you want to plug? I got, I just uploaded like 14 SoundCloud songs since I did the interview. And I am on Leanne on Netflix, well, Hannah Pilkis, she's cool as hell. She's on Leanne on Netflix, all 16 episodes, season two coming soon.

That's right, and my wife was watching this, was laughing her a little butt off. Oh, that's awesome. And then I have got a live show September 27th, 7.30 p.m. at Elysian Theater. So go ahead and catch it unless this episode's not out. Oh, it'll be out. All right, sing his boat. All right. And what do I want to plug?

I want to say, hey, head over to CBBWorld.com. We have, we have so many great shows over there. First of all, you have ad-free episodes of this show, plus the entire archive, every live episode we've ever done all of our tours. Plus, we have shows like CBB Presents, where people who are on this show have their own shows. I think we have a new show coming up on CBB Presents that people will be really interested in. What's that? Well, I don't want to say until it actually comes out.

That's right. And let's see, we also have Scott hasn't seen where I want it. Gareth, our guest, who left. Oh, the A-Block. Yeah, the A-Block. He was on that. We watched Battlefield Earth. Oh, that sounds lovely. What a waste of time that was.

I'll tell you, that A-block. I'm sorry, I missed it. I just can't get enough of A-block. That's right. But so much stuff going on over there. CBBWorld.com. You got to go check it out. All right, let's close up the old plug bag.

And they need some closing We need these bags Because we're nosing Knows it, knows it, knows it It's time to Open up the Slug Bank You got to Join me 25

I'm talking over in the South Bank You got to Then you are alive All right. See 35 seconds. That was nice. Wow. That was Nose and Round by Lout Ha Ha, ha, featuring Benny Shaw, Bobby Moynes, and Scotty Oaks. All right. Thanks so much to them. And if you have any sort of plugs theme, head over to CBBWorld.com slash plugs. You'll find everything you need to upload your own songs and the stems for all of our remixes. And guys, I want to thank you so much for being here, of course. Chief, wonderful to see you again.

it's been a minute. Always good to see you, Scott. Yes. I'll be back in no time. Okay. Well, I hope you'll take a little bit of time because I am actually done for recording for the day, but I'll be back before you know it. Okay. And to the listeners, keep it wet. I'm talking about the bread. Oh, okay. In London. There are a lot of British listeners on this show. That's right. You should come back for wet day, perhaps, if you really want to keep it wet. But I also want to thank Girl Who Had the Craziest Night. We never really got hearing exactly what happened, but hopefully another night like that doesn't occur. Thanks for having me. We've got to go, Allison, we're going to miss the check meat. All right, let's go. Wow, two very, I mean, look, their sisters, that's why they have similar voices. Twins. Twins.

Twins, but one year apart. Oh, okay, interesting. So just let it cook for a little while longer. That's right. All right. And then, of course, we want to thank Jimmy Buffet, James Buffet. Yes. Wonderful guest. Wonderful to have you. Yeah, I would love to have gotten into the British bread stuff a little bit. Oh, yeah.

would have loved to, but unfortunately... Maybe we could do a little bit longer of the... Ooh, no, unfortunately, we have a timer. The show we do it, New Year's Eve style, where there's a ball that drops, and... Oh, look, 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. My food's ready! Hey, hey, hey, see you next time. Thanks, bye.

Thank you.