Comedy Bang Bang: The Podcast - Bonus Bang: A CBB World Speed Force Thanksgiving Special* (*It's Actually Skanksgiving)

Episode Date: November 27, 2025

In order to save the future of CBB World, Rudi North (Shaun Diston) must use the Speed Force to bring Scott Aukerman and some of his most infamous Comedy Bang! Bang! guests from the past together for a Thanks–er–Skanksgiving Feast. Starring Lily Sullivan, Zach Reino, Matt Apodaca, Will Hines, and Devin Field. Music and sound design by Brett Morris. (Originally released as episode 5 on the CBB Presents feed on 11/24/21.) Don’t forget to check out the Comedy Bang! Bang! Action Figures at shop.figurecollections.com and go to actionfigureseller.com for international purchases. If you want more great episodes of Comedy Bang! Bang! become a subscriber at comedybangbangworld.com. We have all of the past episodes from the archives, every live show, ad-free new episodes, and original shows like CBB Presents and Scott Hasn’t Seen. Find more great Comedy Bang! Bang! merch at https://www.podswag.com/collections/comedy-bang-bang Get access to all the podcasts you love, music channels and radio shows with the SiriusXM App! Get 3 months free using this show link: https://siriusxm.com/cbb Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Hey, everyone. Scott Ackerman here and welcome to another bonus bang where we are re-releasing great episodes of comedy bang bang out from behind the paywall. And guys, we have something very special this week. Because this bonus bang is coming out exactly on Thanksgiving Day, we're going to put out something from the CBB Presents archives, which is a Thanksgiving special that we did. This is called a CBB World Speed Force Thanksgiving special with the parenthetical. It's actually Skanksgiving. And this was originally released in the CBB Presents Feed on November 24th, four years ago, 2021, and has only been available there until now. We're getting it out here and we're going to let everyone hear it. This, of course, was a time-bending, mind-warping adventure. And it starred our good friend Rudy North.

That's right. Sean Diston playing Rudy North. It also has Lily Sullivan, Zach Reno, Matt Apodaca, Will Hines, and Devin Field. So a great, great cast, plus incredible music and sound design done by Brett Morris. And this is a big Thanksgiving special from Rudy North. I want you to listen to this and then make sure you hear it all the way to the end, even past the wrap-up, because something very interesting happens at the very end of the episode. and you're going to want to hear it. So listen to the whole thing.

But if you enjoy this and you want to hear other great episodes of Comedy Bang Bang, as well as CBB Presents, become a subscriber at CBBWorld.com. We have specials like this. We have all of the past episodes from the archives, every live show we've done, add-free new episodes, and original shows like Scott hasn't seen, other neighborhood listen, college town, so much great stuff over there. We're going to be back Monday with a new episode of Comedy Bang-Bang, But until then, a happy skanks giving to you and yours and enjoy this bonus bang.

CBB Presents In the beginning, there was only Scott Ackerman. And then there was the great bang bang. In an explosion of creativity and business savvy, he created CBB World, thus spawning the CBB world averse. Then came Rudy North, a being of unknowable power. They connected at Speed Force Thanksgiving 1,304 days ago. But since that Thanksgiving, in a mysterious set of circumstances,

the Speed Force and CBB Worldiverse have become intertwined, setting in motion a series of events that will change CBB world forever. Damn, that Marvel movie was good as hell. They got some Eternals in that motherfucker. Hey, excuse me over there. Are you cleaning up this movie theater? Yeah, that's my job. Now it's your job.

Yeah, that's right. Looks like I got a new job. This is going to be fun. Clean about the popcorn and shit. What the hell? What the... Rudy. Rudy North.

Wait, who are you? Are you? Me? Yes, it is I, Rudy Prime, Rudy North from the future. Wow, I look good as hell, man. Black does not crack. I came here to give you a warning. The CBB Worldiverse is in trouble.

What? Well, we all know CBB World and the Speed Force have a mysterious connection. Well, yes, that's canon. And the Speed Force feeds on new Canon, Canon created by you. I actually didn't know that. Since you've been in Canon Rehab, the Speed Force has grown weak. It's dying, Rudy. And with it, so is the CBB world averse.

Well, what do I do? There's only one thing you can do. You must host a Speed Force Thanksgiving special. and Scott has to have a good time. Future Rudy, I think I could do that. If not, the CBB Worldiverse may be destroyed forever. Well, it looks like I'm off the wagon. Previously, two days ago, on Comedy Bang Bang.

Okay, bye guys. Thank you so much for being on the show. Oh, man. Time to stretch out and relax and do my post-show stretches. And here we go. What the? Scott, it's me. It's Rudy.

I made it. I made it right on time. Rudy North? That's right, Scott. I'm here and I've got a new tease. Oh, no. What's going on? Why are you here?

Scott, I need you for something. Really? I need you for the Speed Force Thanksgiving special on CBBWorld.com. Okay, whatever you need. We're going into the Speedforce right now? That's right, Scott. I know I'm not supposed to be using my powers because of in the canon I am.

Yeah, I don't really remember. Yeah, yeah. But I must use them for Speed Force Thanksgiving, Scott. Are you ready? Whatever you need, buddy. Let's do it. Welcome to the CBB World Speed Force Thanksgiving special, y'all. I'm your host, Rudy North, and I'm here with my guest of honor.

Co-host with the brosest, with the bro-most, with the-the-brough, with the- We talked about this. What do I say? Co-host with the bro-brost. Because I broasted a chicken for this. My co-host with the bro-brost. Roast. Coming through with the bro-brose. Scotty Ackerman. Scott, how you doing?

I'm great, Rudy. So good to see you. Was I coming in hot just now? You were at least medium temperature, but you're edging up to hot. I feel like I'm coming in hot. You definitely are hot. I'm feeling good today. Yeah, I'm glad. Hey, I just want to make sure are we recording this because I don't, I don't talk unless I'm being recorded. Yes, Scott. This is the CBB World Speed Force Thanksgiving special. Okay, good. Yeah, I need to monetize any time I open my mouth. I wouldn't just invite you over to have dinner or some shit. Yeah, good.

We got to make some fucking money, man. Now, Scott, I'm so glad you're here because I had something to tell you, Scott. Oh, really? Oh, okay. Let me guess. Let's see. You want to tell me you are in a relationship. It's not some kind of my thing.

Maybe you purchased something for the holidays. Okay, no, you're getting closer. Maybe you're a family member has passed away. No, Scott. Scott, I got a news. job. Oh, of course. I should have known. Yeah, you should have known that, Scott. What was your last job? I don't remember. You were trying to clean up. I think my last job was I was a Zoom security guard.

Oh, right. And that didn't go too well. There's not a lot of call for. Not a lot of call at this point. You know, we'll open it up. We're not too much on Zoom. Well, I'm so glad we could be here in person, Scott. In poison. In poison. Do you have a new accent, too? I've got a new affectation. Scott, I'm so glad we could be here in person inside the Speed Force, Scott. Oh, my God. Some of my most favorite times in my life have been spent in the Speed Force with you. For the people who don't know, me and Scott in 2018 celebrated our first Speed Force Thanksgiving together.

Four years ago, we traveled inside the, you know, for those of you who don't know even this, Rudy, you have the powers of the Flash. I have the powers of the Flash. I got the powers of the Force from Star Wars. I do think I could stretch my arms like stretch arms strong I've never seen that and you've never even tried I tried to do it one time

did not work So why do you think you have these powers That's a good question Scott I think therefore I am Oh okay So it's one of those things But you know Scott I'm so glad you're here

We're in the speed force for the listeners How many times are you gonna say You're so glad I'm here Hold on I'm so glad I'm here I'm so glad I'm here I'm so glad to be here I'm freaking glad to be here Scott Because we celebrated four years ago, and we haven't really kept up the tradition of Speed Force Thanksgiving.

No, I mean, honestly, the pandemic happened. It happened. And we can't, in the Speed Force, by the way, the Speed Force is about a, it's a six by six-by-six room. Yeah, it's also very COVID compliance. You need to, like, do home testing. They kind of shut stuff down. A PCR test 48 hours in advance. We were like, fuck that.

They shut stuff down in the Speed Force months before they didn't in L.A. Yeah. And I had been, you know, I'd been holding. up with Sprague the Whispers. You were hanging out with Sprague the entire pandemic. And you guys were having fun, huh? We had a lot of fun. What you guys been up to? We did not take it seriously for the first eight months of COVID. You guys were in restaurants and shit, kissing people. And so you guys have fun. You've

been watching movies. That's been sounded like a blast I heard. Yeah. Oh, it's been so fun. I mean, I've missed you, obviously. Oh, we're best friends, Scott. Oh, of course. We're best friends. But I hang out with him exclusive. Oh, truly. Truly. Well, we became best friends in the speed for us. We did. I didn't much know that much about you or care that much about you and then we went to the Speed Force together. We spent multiple years in the Speed Force

and they came back to the very moment we left, Scott. And it's interesting because it was a lot like Picard in that one episode of Next Generation where he mentally goes into someone else's body and ages you know, but when he gets back to his own present he hasn't aged a day and that was what happened with us.

Gain the wisdom of a lifetime. Exactly. He knows how to play like a weird flute, which I also do. Yeah. You do, don't you? Yeah, let me see you. Let me see if you could play that weird piece. I saw you brought it. Let's see. How you playing it?

Yeah, that's not. Yeah, you might want to flip it around. There you go. It's pretty weird. That's a lot. I got to say, that was pretty good. How long did it take you 45 years to learn? 45 years to learn that.

That is a lot of time. My wife was bummed. Oh, by the way, I was married in the Speed Force to someone else. Would you marry? Oh, I married the Black Racer. Oh, yes, the Black Racer. Yes. From the candidate of, you know, the flat.

yeah of course yeah well i mean we share canon with the flash yes yes we all share the same way you share the the canon of the star wars the canada of everything i have the powers of the flash but you know scott the last time we talked i was in canon rehab yeah i remember something about that and your um your sponsor was my sponsor cake boss yeah and i just had a lot of trouble recently too with like you know fucking up his hand yeah he like nailed his hand into a cake or something i remember what that dudes was. But, you know, the last time I was here, I said, I'd never use my flash powers again. Right. But I thought to myself, it's Speed Force Thanksgiving. We got to get the homies together. I got to get the homies together. And look, there might be some sort of convoluted reason why we need

to do this to save the CBB world of us. I'm just here for you. We don't need to discuss that. No. Right now, Scott, you're about to have the best Speed Force skanksgiving. Skanksgiving. That's that you've ever had at your life. Scott, it's going to be a skanksgiving. Basically, when all the skanks from Halloween who have dressed up like slutty versions of whatever. They forget to change for a month. And then they come and they're like,

what, y'all eat turkey in here? Ask skisgivis, Scott. Now, Scott, are you ready to explore your own life, Scott? I don't know what that means. So I couldn't tell you if I'm ready. I probably am because I don't give a shit, but go on. Scott, the meaning of Speed Force Thanksgiving,

as we all know, is to reflect. on the things that you are thankful for, Scott. I didn't realize that. That's almost like regular Thanksgiving. It is. Oh, hold up. Let me check my Twitter real quick. Regular Thanksgiving is canceled.

What? Regular Thanksgiving is canceled. The word Thanksgiving should not be used anymore. They finally canceled Thanksgiving? God, this is cancel culture. Okay. So I think we can't say Thanksgiving, Scott, because, you know, the history of Thanksgiving is tainted, Scott.

Oh, I mean, yeah, on both sides. Both sides, some very fine people. There's fine people on both sides. It's tainted on both sides, Scott. So, you know what? I think we should rename this thing right off the bat. Okay, what do you? Let's spitball some ideas.

I want to call it. We could call it Skanksgiving. We kind of already have that. It's pretty good, actually. We just stumbled into it. Okay, is it better? I know you came in with something that you were very fond of, but let's just put it up against Skanksgiving.

Yeah, yeah. Am I going to get canceled for some? saying speed force thanksgiving or speed force skanksgiving i like skanksgiving i don't know okay okay here's what we're gonna call it a cbb world speed force thanksgiving special asterix actually it's skanksgiving okay all right i think we won't get canceled for that no no no how could two guys like you and me get canceled i'm cancel proof baby i punch people to throw it all the time i steal people's jobs i am cancel proof scott yeah exactly and so i'm am I, right?

Yeah, right? Yeah, exactly. Oh, your eyes are darting around really fast. Just don't listen to the CBB archives. Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'd say start at episode 600, if to be safe. Yeah, that's probably around when we started really. Well, Scott, Thanksgiving, I mean, Thanksgiving, can only be celebrated in the

Speed Force with friends and families. Oh, okay. Well, four years ago, it was just you and me. It was just you and me. And, of course, the Black Racer. And the Black Racer and the Reverse Flash. Yeah. And I think King Shark was in there.

But the weather wizard. The weather wizard was in there. Just to eat and then like was like, oh God, I got another. He's got another thing and I'm like, okay, weather wizard. He's going home to like jack off or something. Weather wizard always jack it off. Jack it off in like a sleep store. He's crazy.

That's kidding. Now, Scott, I have gone into your history, into your past, into your soul, Scott. Not the CBB archives. No, no, no, no. kind of hovering, starting around episode 600. I have assembled a motley crew of a Thanksgiving

family, Scott. Oh, like you've brought in some of my favorite guests of all time? Some of the most iconic, some of the most memorable. I say iconic too, baby. Some of the most iconic, memorable guests that I think

when you had them on, I think when it was over, you said, we need to be friends outside of this. I want to invite you to actual things. Okay, this is amazing. I mean, the mind is just reeling of who could possibly be here. Who are you thinking about Jason Manzookas or something? Oh, of course. Yeah, I mean, yeah.

You know, probably Santa Claus or something. Not too fine. Yeah, you guys get into a lot of fights. Yeah. But, Scott, I'm about to fetch our first guest. Okay. I'm so excited. But in order to do that, I do have to dip into the speed for Scott.

Oh, okay. Yeah, that's understandable. Are you picking up these guests from? I'm picking up these guests. these guests from episodes past, Scott. Oh, okay. This episode, God, I don't even fucking know.

Sometime last year, sometime hovering around the 600s. Scott, you ready to meet this guest? Oh, yeah, definitely. Oh, God, this is amazing that you would do this for. Here we go. I'm about to go. And... Yeah!

Scott! Oh, my God. You're all sweaty? I'm all sweaty. That was really hard. Scott. Wait, were you jacking off too? No, Scott.

I mean, look, when you're running, I will say when you're running through time, there is a sort of friction that happens on your body that is very hot. Very pleasurable. It is very pleasurable. Okay. But, Scott, I have brought one of your favorite guests, Francesca Bolognazes, Scott. What the heck am I doing here? Hi, Francesca. How are you?

Hi. Hi, Francesca. I'm glad that you look about the four years older. I just saw you like probably like three months ago. Sorry. Sorry, I'm so sorry. I guess you had a rough for a few months. Okay, I guess.

Francesca, how are you? Thank you for being here. Welcome to Speedforce Thanksgiving. Thank you for having me. I'm honored. What's your name, Rudy? Oh, my name is Rudy. So used to talking to my best friend.

I mean, my other friend spray. Yeah, I wouldn't bring that up again. I'm cut my piss me up. Okay. What is she doing here? She's one of your favorite guests, Francesca Polynesia? Francesca Polonaise? Yeah, yeah, absolutely.

She hates me. No, no, that cannot be true. Oh, okay. All right. Hey, Francesca, I'm so glad you're, I'm so honored you're here. I heard everything you guys say. Oh, she. Oh.

Such a piece of shit, everything you guys say. No, what do you mean? Listen, I want to start a clean slate, okay? I'm going to have a good time today. Okay, well, thank you for coming to speed. I did dip into the episode and pull your ass out and said, we're about to have Thanksgiving dinner, come with me. And you said, okay, whatever.

Oh, in the middle of the episode? Yeah, yeah. I pulled about the middle of the episode. Like mid-sentence? No, it was kind of around plugs. Oh, okay. During the actual plug thing. I was talking about the new Twitter handle that I found out about.

L-I-L-Y, Y-I-L-L-Y. Too confusing. It's kind of weird. I'm not confusing at all, it's a very simple. That'd be kind of wasteful if you had that as a Twitter hand. No, it's not my Twitter, right? No, Jason Menzutkis. Yeah.

Okay. Oh, he's here. He's coming, right? No, no, no, he's not. Jason Benzugue. I don't think, I mean, maybe. Maybe keep hopes up. All right.

Now, Francesco. Yeah, so. Tell me about your connection to Thanksgiving. Are you happy to be here today? Are you going to. Do they even celebrate it? Where are you from again? I am from Italy.

I am from Sardinia. Okay. That's why I am so small. Okay. Oh, interesting. Have we talked about how small you are? We have not taken up. I don't know that they did it ever come up.

Did you start doing the show when we were on Zoom? I can't remember because everyone looks big on Zoom. Exactly. So you guys don't know that. So your camera was just right up. So you were, that big sardine can you were sitting on, that wasn't like a big chair. That was an actual sardine can. Yeah, exactly.

So I am one foot. One foot tall? One foot tall. One foot tall. 12 inches 13 inches If you want to On the good day

There's an easy way to prove this Let me just Here we go So six of those And a half Six and a half Now Francesca Okay so you're from Italy

So you're not that familiar With Thanksgiving No Well I have lived in the US For a long time now And I had to say I think Thanksgiving is so fucking stupid I think it is the stupid

It's a little holiday What do you mean? Well, okay, so I work for Bedbeth and Beyond, as we all know. We all know you work for Beth and Beyond. They open a new department called Bed, Beth, and Holiday. Okay. But what happened to Beyond? Well, this is just an offshoot of Bed, Bet, Beth, and Beyond.

So when you go into Bed Bath and Holiday, there's nothing beyond. Everything is beyond. Oh, okay. Is this like the Metaverse? Yes. Oh, okay. Everything is beyond that. But specifically, Bedbeth and Holiday, we specialize in only holiday stuff.

And so I have to work on the stupidest days. And people come in, oh, can I get a turkey? Can I get a turkey? That might be their problem. They might be confused. It's a lot of meat. A lot of... What meat?

Okay, I realize they changed the name of the store. Okay, so Bedbath and holidays kind of now butcher shop. Yes, so people come, you know, can I eat the chicken or eat some stuff in it? Chicken isn't even Thanksgiving related. It's kind of weird if they would want to check. Unless it's like a turkey or something. But so anyway, everybody comes back, oh, I want to return my turkey. It tastes like a woodchip.

So when they buy a turkey? They want to return it. And they can return it. And of course, well, they try to return it. They come to me. I work in returns. They come, they say, oh, I try to eat this turkey. It tastes like wood.

cheap. I want to return it. Or I had this mashed potato, it tastes like a bunch of little wood chip. Are you guys advertising that you sell food and then sell people wood chips? Because that would be odd y'all. I mean, no, this is a high quality, best, bad and beyond style. It is the finest quality. So are you working on Thanksgiving?

Is that what you're saying? You don't get to celebrate with your own family, Francesca. Well, I don't want to celebrate with my husband. Keith. Have we talked about Keith before? I don't know that he's ever come up. He's come up. I don't know that that's actually his name.

Oh. But no, Keith. In the Speed Force on that they're off. In the speed force, everything is canon. Keith is always, oh, can you come to my family's house to spend things? Give me with my mom, Sandra, and my dad, Thomas. Those you remember. And I say, I think not this year.

I work at Bedbed Immune Stacks. Oh, so you're picking up shifts. Yes, I'm picking up. But really, you know, I would not go. I think Thanksgiving is so stupid. Why you have to be so grateful for your stupid fucking life? Your life sucks. Okay, but, okay.

You have a bad life. But it's kind of like, okay, you don't have anything to be thankful for, Frances. I am. I mean, I have a good life, so, but I don't mean I have to be telling you? You hate your husband. You seem to be very upset. said job. You hate me, I think. Well, yes. But my life, my life is not as bad as say some guy named Brad who work at like communications, some kind of financial place. Okay. That guy's

life so stupid. Yeah, Brad probably stuck. Thank you for that. Yeah. I guess so. But I guess I think everyone feels that way about their own life. Like someone would look at you and go like, oh my God, she's married to Keith with, you know, whose parents are Sandra and Thomas. Thomas, right. You know, and she works at Bed, Bath, and Beyond. And why does she have to be thankful

for her stupid life, you know? My life is so good. Well, you should be thankful. That's the perfect reason to be thankful, but you don't think anyone else in the world deserves to be thankful. Exactly. Well, I think everybody here

have really lost standards for their lives. Their lives are so bad. Okay, but so Scott, for instance, he's got a lot to be thankful for. I don't know. He's got, you know, he's got a beautiful wife. He's got a beautiful career. Why is that where your mind goes immediately? Scott has a lot going on.

He's got a banging ass wife. Great dogs. An incredible career. Best friends. Yeah. Like me. Yeah, sure. Okay.

So you're saying Scott has another to be thankful for? I mean, that's crazy for. I think in Scott's mind, he has a lot to be thankful for. But from outsiders' perspective, no, thank you. Okay. This is some beat shit to be saying on Skakesgiving. On Skakesgiving. Oh, by the way, for Halloween this year, I want to tell you about my sexy costume.

Yeah, what was your sexy costume? Yeah, what was your sexy costume? For Halloween this year, I was a Denny Davido, but sexy. Oh, okay. So, bald cap. bald cape. With hair in the back, I would imagine. Yes.

Like, but not in a specific role, like the penguin or Louis de Pono or anything. From Matilda. Oh. Was that what he was at, as sexiest? I think, yes. Okay. So, like, with a G string or? No panes.

No pants at all. So he's Donald Duck? He doesn't want, yeah, Donald Duck style. So just the top and no bottom. Okay. So what did you do? You're naked from the waist out. I just wanted to do it.

Did you have like a packing penis or something to make it look like this is clearly daddy? packing penis. It's a press, it's a, it's a sex toy used in the lesbian community to simulate a penis Don't you, aren't you guys thankful that you learned that piece of information? I love it. That was the best information I ever learned. I still don't understand what it is.

Are you simulating the, because I would imagine you're using your own pubic hair and then putting a fake penis on top of it? No pubic hair. Oh, cool. I don't need to know that. Okay, okay. I didn't know that that was Danny DeVito's thing. No, but in Sardinia, nobody has pubic hair. No, really?

Everybody, very small. Yeah, you can't waste any, like, surface area on pubic hair when you're that small. Did you want to be Danny DeVito because he's almost, how tall is he? He's, like, two feet three or something like that? He is a big guy. Well, to you, yeah. He's huge. Francesco, what?

So you like Halloween. Is Halloween a fun time at the store? Halloween, I love. I take my son to go to the different houses. Wait, you never talked about your son? Yes, I haven't talked about my son. Again, I don't remember his name. Okay.

No, my son's name is Daniel. Why do you say it like that? You seem contemptuous of anyone else. Anytime you say a name, it just seems like you're upset. No, it's just a stupid American name. Oh, did your husband force you to name? Yes, it's more. My grandfather name Daniel Plains.

What did you want? I mean, what's it like a Sardinia name? For me, I would do something like, uh, uh, Qual, Kuali. What do you say?

Kuali Kuali Kualikapakanini. Gualika Pekanini. Is that two names or is that like one single? It's a hyphenated name. Oh, hyphenated. Guilina Paganini. Interesting. Or, um, Arrencini.

Aruncini That is a pretty tight name It's a pretty nice name What about Rudy? No It doesn't Say Rudy How does it

Come off the tongue Rudy Okay You have this Aventation Like you're imitating A dumb American You say

You did sound a little Cosby in that moment Rudy Thanksgiving You know Cosby It's gonna get canceled Right now

Yeah we can't talk about Cosby Do you realize that his name on the show Wasn't just Cliff It was Heathcliff. It was Heathcliff, Cosby? Yeah.

He was on the show, wow. He was on the Cosby show? Oh, no. That he meant on the comedy bang, but I'm thinking. What? Because in your archives, I thought maybe. Oh, well, you know.

Don't listen to the archives. I wouldn't fucking the archives. Yeah. Well, Francesca, I'm sorry. Brow you here. I thought you'd be a person who'd be excited to come to dinner with me and Scott and record on special.

I guess it is fine for me. You know, it's better than being with my family. Yeah, or at the. store i guess well i mean but you were pulled it's not thanksgiving for you in your reality you were pulled from the middle of an episode i was filled from a middle of an episode yeah and how was that episode going oh so good i get so many lives yeah it's true everybody afterward going to tell me wow he blew me away scott's going to say please come back please please i beg you i don't remember doing that i mean i just show up in my producer as book guest oh okay

Oh, please, Francesca, we need you. The show is doing so badly. Will you please come back? To be honest, yeah, this sounds kind of familiar. That's kind of the kind of thing you do. You get down like sort of cuck. Now, Francesca, I have low tea. Yeah, you do have low tea.

That's canon of the speed force. Now, Francesca. Yes. Bedbath and holiday. Drown out the holidays coming up with the December season coming around. You got Christmas. You got Kwanza. Yes.

You got Hanuk. Yes. Boxing Day. You got boxing day. You got New Year's. Boxing Day. How are things around the store in that time? Do you start to feel like people are returning less food and having more fun?

Wow, such a good question. I'm a great interview. I think what happened usually about the Christmas time is everybody coming. They say, oh my gosh, things are going crazy for us. We need to come up with a ham for Thanksgiving. Can you please give us a ham? They need to come up with a ham for thanks. So they're in a bind where they...

Something's going on where they need a ham. And they need to come up with it. Please, we have to come up with a ham as soon as possible. There's maybe some ham shortage in town. Are you sure you're not misinterpreting what these people? You think there's no language barrier thing going on? Oh, no. I understand perfectly everything that they say.

So what do you say back to them when they're going to? And I say, okay, I have something for you. A little stupid idiot. So you say it at that volume? And I give them I give them one of the Bedbetter and be on the hams Bedbet and be on the ham

And that's what it's called And then they come back to me Oh, it takes like a wood chip So can I get something else? Which for me at this point I'm like, why you keep coming back here? You guys see you at Thanksgiving. I see you now again.

Sounds like they came once And then they were dissatisfied with the product So they came back again. That's why they came back. Exactly. They wanted their money back. So I just tell them, listen, why are you not taking your big, fat, stupid I am? Go fly into a river of blood and suck in the blood and die.

You know, Francesca, it sounds like you don't like your job. I love my job. My favorite job. Do they love you in it or are they just concerned that if they were to fire you, it would be like, you're so short. It's almost like you have a disability. Yeah, it's kind of like. They're just keeping you on because it's kind of illegal to fire you.

Yeah. Well, they say to me, I honestly think they may not know I still work there. Oh, okay. Because I basically, I am in the deli, um, inside of the counter. So there's a deli. So I kind of, hanging out inside with the meats and everything like that. Which is like a mansion to you. It's a huge.

He smells so good. But my husband always, why do you know, come back home? How big is your husband? He is a 10 feet. 10 feet tall This is a fucked up relationship But you got to be thankful Because you've got yourself a fine tall man

I am very thankful Because that is the number one Most important thing for a woman Find the tall man Does he think you're a pet Like does he Are you married to him or does he think you're like a cat Or something like that?

Well he put me in his pocket We cannot walk around The neighborhood He showed me off He said please don't touch This is mine This sounds like a relationship These sounds like a healthy

Man and Women in a relationship Wow well Francesca Thank you for being here I didn't know you hated Thanksgiving I wouldn't have pulled you here If I do you hate to Thanksgiving No it's fine I'm happy to see you But not Scott

Oh wow Please man this is really putting a damper on my good time Sorry you know what Scott Don't mind Francesca She's here she's gonna have a great time But maybe I should pull Get a good guest You know what

You're a great guest But I'm gonna get a Hall of Fame guests Okay, yeah, great Now we're gonna get a Hall of Fame guests We're gonna get to really celebrate this thing Let's get the family, Scott Okay, yeah, the fam here we go Here we go

I'm running into the Speed Force My nose is bleeding this time Oh my gosh Scott I have pulled from episode 641. 641.

I'm trying to remember. What was that? Somewhere where you were, you were definitely not saying anything cancelable by that time. No, yeah. But he's one of your favorite guest,

Scott. Dash grab him is here. Scott? Oh. Hey. You remember Dash grab him, right? Yeah, I remember Dash grab him. Yeah, I was talking about

after I heard you shouting from the room. I don't know anything that guy just said. I'd rather he didn't come I'm back. He was confusing. Is that really what happened? When I left? Yeah.

Yeah, he thought he couldn't hear me, but I was hiding. What? You were hiding? Yeah. Like Jay Leno style? Who's that? Oh, he's not a Pokemon. I saw your eyes light up.

I'll catch a Jay Leno and I'll add him to my collection. Trying to think of what his strengths might be and his weaknesses. Sounds like a denim type to me. Anyway, I do a lot of hide. You got to be hiding all the time. Well, Dash, I'm sorry. that's the way that episode ended, but I wanted to welcome you to Speedforce Thanksgiving. Hey, thanks. Who are you?

Oh, I'm Rudy North, of course. Whoa. You want to listen to my previously on? What's that? Never by. Yeah, yeah. Now, Dash, thank you for being here. I wanted to introduce you to Francesca Bolanez.

Hi, Francesca. Hi, nice of meet you. And, um, I... Now, she's great. She is, isn't she? She's so small. Yeah. She's about as big as a Pokemon, right?

Or maybe not. Maybe Pokemon's are huge. I have no idea. Yeah, you know, you just described two different options for Pokemon, Scott. Small or small? Some are big. The world is wide and full of wonder. And each and every Pokemon is different and unique in its own way.

But they all have lessons to teach us if we're only wise enough to listen. Wow. This guy sucks. And then we take them and we make them fighting brutal battles against each other. Oh, that's right. Squintching the earth beneath them. the stirring dominance over each other to win trophy and money, money

prizes. Well, now, Dash. That's a lot to take in. Sure. Now, thank you for being here. I'm really happy to be here. Just wanted to repeat that for Scott. I'm happy to be anywhere all time. I'm pretty medium about being here. We know that, Francesca. Now, what's your relationship to Thanksgiving,

Dash? Are you a celebrator Thanksgiving? Do you have it in the Canto region? That's right from Scott. You remember. Right, Scott. You do like this guy. Because there's a lot of inkeepers who have food. They got food. Yeah, there's a lot of hospitals.

There's a lot of police stations. There's a lot of Italian restaurants where my bosses hide. There's a lot of bushes that you cannot get through. Okay. I've seen bushes in this world and you can just like go through those bad boys. Yeah. I mean, you're bigger than a bush. These are rock solid bushes.

You're trying to go through these bushes. You can't do it. Okay, but what about Thanksgiving? What's that? Oh, yeah. No, we don't have that. As I understand it, that's the holiday that y'all celebrate where you sort of celebrate your sort of subjugation of the problematic time in America's history. Of the native people of this land that you then took. And they're like, can we have it back?

And everyone thinks that that would be ridiculous for some reason. Right. Right. Well, today we're celebrating Skanksgiving, so you don't got to worry about it. Oh, I tell you about my sexy Halloween costume. Okay. Yeah. Where were you?

I guess that, yeah, let's hear about it. I was a six C bicycle Okay Wow Sexy bicycle Yeah How does that you know

You got on a bicycle And you can suddenly go So much faster than you could before Okay Yeah I'm waiting for the sexy part That's the what do you mean That's the sexy part

That's just You can go so much faster than you could If you were just walking around Because now you're a sexy bicycle Okay Like I don't think going fast is what you want in sex I think like you Usually want to go slow and long

you know, from what I heard. I'm going to be totally honest with you, Sky. I am not 100% certain on like what sexiness is. Oh, have you ever, I mean, have you ever been in a relationship, Dash? Yes. I mean, because how old are you again? 12. Right. Okay. Yeah, maybe you shouldn't be talking. How do you think, how do people reproduce in Kanto or reach? I mean, is it something that you learn in school? Rudy, I'm not supposed to say, but you say, but you say I can say it. Yeah, you can say it. They fuck Rudy. Oh, geez. What did you say? What was it? You can say it out loud That's how they do it

Okay Do you ever see people doing it? I mean, they don't know I'm sneaking around I'm not supposed to know Well I don't do it I don't purposely try to find people Having sex

But as I said before I'm always hiding Yeah Well sometimes you're in a place And people don't know you're there I'm just trying to catch a zigzagoon I'm just hanging out Trying to find a

ZigZegoon And then you're there All the sudden And then people start having sex like, ooh, there's no one there. Bad for two reasons. One, now I got to watch sex. Two, you don't like.

It scared away all the zigzagoon. Yeah. You seem to like the sex, though. You say it's kind of fun, no? I feel torn about it. On the one hand, I'm like, ew. On the other hand, I'm like, okay. What's the best sex you've ever seen?

Okay. Describe it. Apart from the zigzagoon part. Yeah, I guess if the zigzagoon got in there, sure. Well, it didn't, but then they left. And then I caught a zigzagoon. Oh, okay. So that's what they did.

That was the best sex. That sex ended with me having a zigzagoon. Do I want to ask what a zigzagoon is? Yeah. Okay. Oh, you do. It's okay. What is a zigoo?

In your world, you know, like a raccoon? Take the nose. Okay. Pull it out. Okay. Now it's far away from where it was before. It's long and pointy. Now take the stripes.

Run those bad boys all the way up and down that raccoon. That stripe from tip to tail. Okay. Now give it powers, Rudy. Okay, I don't know my powers. Give it fighting powers. Okay. All right.

That's a zigoon. Okay. I guess I'd rather watch people fucking. I'd choose a zigzagoon, you know what I mean? I don't. No. I choose a zigzagoon every day. What does that mean?

Are you having sex with a zigzagoon that you've enslaved? Dash, you can say it. I don't think so. Okay. What are you doing with it? Because maybe you don't know what sex is. I say zigzagoon, scratch. Okay.

Okay. I say zigzagoon. dig oh shut it real loud and then he does it okay interesting do you still have Andy Richter in this in the

in your Pokemon no I did have a long conversation with officer Jenny who said you can't take Andy Richter around with you in a little tiny void right because he has

actual humans yeah which I sort of knew but it's one of those laws that it's like you got to as a Pokemon turn you gotta push the boundaries you want to be the very best like no one ever was you got to be willing to sort of

break a few eggs you want to make it home I know it's a more recent law but yeah you can't really keep humans anymore you can keep animals though and make them do whatever you want usually now I kind of see you right now sort of edging over to Francesca with that little thing yeah with your Pokemon

ball what is it I don't think you should try to capture she is a guest of ours okay but she's like so small I know she's very sure she also doesn't have any pubic hair She doesn't have a... Don't you dare talk about my pubic hair Scott, you fucking creep?

You talked about it first. I didn't talk about my pubic hair. I mean, you was so proud of it. What the fuck is the wrong with you? It makes you look like a Pokemon because Pokemon's don't have pubic hair, right? Right? Help me out here, Dash.

Some of them got so much, Scott. Like which ones? Like the real fluffy ones? That's pubics? Like, uh, Ursuling. That's pubis? You know, you say some of these references. They kind of go over by Scott's heads.

Sure. But could you, here's what I want to ask you, Dash. Okay. Because I'm tired of talking about this Pokemon bullshit. Yeah, move on. Wait from it. Dash, it's Thanksgiving here in the Speed Force. Skangskine.

Hashtag Thanksgiving. Hashtag Skangskine, Rudy Scott. What do you have to be thankful for this season, Dash? Well, I found something recently that really changed my life a lot, Rudy. And I'm very, very thankful for it. Wow. Religion? In a way, it is now.

I found rare candy You found rare candy? I found rare candy Like it's not cooked all the way through You know that Like a well-done Reese's pieces That might be true I don't know what it is

I don't know where it comes from I find it in the weirdest places Sometimes in boxes Sometimes in the corpses of Pokemon Who I have to feed it Did you bring any for our feast today? Yeah you want some here Take them there

That's how you share food for Thanksgiving right This is so rare Let me tell you, if you eat this, you're going to, can I say it, Rudy? You can say it, Dash. You're going to feel fucking fantastic. Boy, Dash is growing up. He's got that age, right? You know, in the speed force, time moves a little bit differently.

It's going to make you feel strong. Okay. It's going to make your bones grow. Now, hold on. Oh, I don't want that I like being small. You do? Yes. Okay.

Dash, this thing you put in front of us, kind of looks like a couple lines of powder and what are we supposed to do with this? I think you put it right up your nose. Okay. Should we, I mean, should we do some of this work. I guess, yeah, I guess we should. This is rare.

I went to, a man in the corner gave me this one. I said, do you have any rare candy? He said, nose candy? I said, yes. Okay. I don't want an insult Dash over here. We should definitely, probably. All right.

All right. Oh, fuck. I think it's too much. You okay? Franceschi, you okay? It was just a regular line, but to her. It's like a giant. I can't feel my tongue over my head.

That's your tongue and heart leveling up. I got to say, I am feeling very good right now. This is good. I mean, this is, this, Skyskivings looking up. Skyskivis looking up. I feel like I came in very hot earlier. I was cooling off and I'm hot again. You're hot as hell.

Super effective, Rudy. Dash, I'm so glad you came through with that rare candy. Thank you so much for being here, Dad. My pleasure. I also brought curry. It's the only thing we eat, really, most of the time. Curry? Curry.

A bunch of curry. Okay. Okay, well, I'll pass on the curry, but if you have any more that fun candy. Yeah, if you got any more that red candy, like, stop holding out on it. Well, I got to give some of the zigzagoon, but you'll share what I got. Okay. Sure, yeah, okay. But maybe, yeah, maybe me and Scott could put some money together and then you could go hit up your guy.

Yeah, your guy, yeah, who has all the guy in the corner, where was he, you said? Is he in the Kanto region? I wish I could remember. No, he's here. He's here? Okay, cool. He's here at the Speed Force? Yeah.

Okay. I might know this guy. I might know this guy. This might be Black Racer, to be a little. Oh, okay. I don't want to see black race, right? You know what we broke up. And it's black because his costume is black. Yeah, no, we're not talking about like Jesse Owens or anything like that.

Oh, Dash, man, you, thank you so, Dash, you have brought in some energy that maybe Francesca did not bring in. What the heck? It's your fucking problem. You know, it might have been my fault. I might have pulled some of the wrong, you know, Scott, I haven't used my powers in a long time. No, yeah. So I'm pulling people out. I feel like I have powers right now.

You're pulling a group of people that were supposed to alienate Scott, make him feel alone? No. Oh. Oh, is that what I was. Okay, that might have been the mistake. Yeah, because so far with these first two guests, it seems like, you know, there's not, not my favorite. No, no, no, no. I no, Scott.

I no longer can you feel my leg. Okay, you'll be okay for it. You'll be okay. Just lead up against that matchbox. Now, okay, you know what? Here's a little champagne, you know, one of those things you want to twist off of the, just sit on this. Oh, you mean a cork? Yeah.

No, not a cork, but the little. little metal thing. The little metal thing. Yeah, this is like a beach chair for you. It does look like a tiny stool when you take it off the top of the champagne. Exactly. Rudy, can I have the champagne? Dash, you can have a little bit of champagne just because it's the holiday.

I'm going to drink all of it, okay? All right. Do whatever you want. Wow. Okay. You know what, Scott? I'm actually, I might have fucked up. Really?

I might have fucked up. I was underestimating the level of guests that we need in order to have a successful Thanksgiving specials, Scott. Okay. So, but now you're going to course correct. Now, you're going to course correct. I'm not going to course correct. I'm not going to get your.

Jason Mansookas just yet. Okay, all right. But I am going to bring one of your all-time faves, Scott. Oh, boy. Here we go. I'm gear it up to run it to the speed port. Here we go.

Ah! Shit. Okay, I hit my toe when I was covered in. Woo! That thing's huge in red. It is. It is throbbing like one of them Tom and Jerry cartoons.

Yeah. But it's going to be all worth it because Scott, I brought one of you. best friends Buck Tango, Scott. Who? Hey,

it's, it, hello, it's me, Buck Tango. Who? This is, you know, I hate to, I hate to say this

this way. Rudy, you did, you fucked up. What do you mean? I mean, I'm happy to be here. I'm happy to see you. We know each other,

but I met Scott one time. Oh, wait, no, no. One time. One time. I thought you guys were great friends. I mean, I repeat for a third time.

Who? you might remember me as well last time I saw you you were coming from my meck I built a meck and that was like my whole thing coming from his me I'm gonna switch my question to what so

there lies the problem we were having a real back and forth a tete of tete if you will with the Sparks with the Sparks brothers and Edgar Wright and Jack Jack Furze was also there

oh yeah the Night Wolf or he takes pictures of Night Wolf and I came in I came in hot with an announcement. I thought I was going to blow the roof off very much. You told him about your crazy announcement? He was not interested? They, they, if you could believe it, nobody in the room knew what I was talking about.

Okay, okay. Nobody understood what a mech was. You have to drop it on his answer. A bunch of older white guys. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I didn't realize that trying to explain what a mech was to, uh, two 70-year-old was going to be an issue. And the sparks. Scott is actually 72.

Okay, Francesca. Now, Scott, this is my friend. He's building a mex, Scott. Yeah, we're homies. We're homies. That's not been established. Bucktango, Rudy Doors. Our adventures are storied.

Okay. Everyone's always talking about the classic times that Rudy and Buck had. Okay. I mean, I kind of remember you. What is it? You're building an exoskeleton because people... Yeah, a mechanized exoskeleton because of my slight frame. I am Tweed.

I'm a bit of a I'm bitch made. I'm really, really small. But what do you think, Francesca? I mean, he looks huge.

I'm five six. Massive person. He's like, huge guy. Compared to Francesca, you're just an adorable size. You can tear your ass up, Francesca.

What the fuck you get? Scott, hold up, we can't get casted up in you. Can't speak of that. Well, I did fuck up because I brought you here because I thought you guys

are friends. I'm like bringing up to do it once. I barely even remember. I think we talked about. If I remember correctly, you said to, that you told me, see you in 2036. I'll see you in 15 years. Oh, right. Well, that's, it's kind of 2036.

Yeah. Well, that's the thing. I have a, if I could. Yeah. I have an announcement to me. I brought something to Thanksgiving, and I'd like to announce that I brought it. Okay. Now, now we're talking.

Scott, this is going to get your shit going. All right. Well, yeah. I mean, I haven't had a great time here today. No, you're having a good time so far. This is kind of a disappointment. best time of your fucking life so far. I brought rare candy.

You look so much less old than you did when we started. Yeah, the rare candy was a good part. You looked so old today, Scott. I don't know what was going on. Have you been to any weird beaches lately, Scott? Okay, what's just one that Bet Midler was at? That is one weird beach. That's so weird.

Anyway, what do you got? Well, I'll just get right to it. I, you know, in the speed force, I've completed my me. I went back to the drawing board and I completed it. What the fuck is a Mac? You guys don't know what a Mac is? Oh. Okay, Dash knows with a Beck.

Jesus. Macs are so cool. This is what I needed. I needed the spirit of the youth to hear my announcement. We had some problems with the last one. It made me look smaller than I actually was. Oh, yeah, you had to crouch to get into it. And it looked like I was sitting on a toilet.

It was not very flattering. It basically was like a toilet with like a suit of Yeah, but it accentuated my, if I can be frank for one second. We're all friends here. My sweet, juicy can. It made my ass look gigantic. You're one of several people that I've had on the show recently who have giant asses. Look, they're all the rage.

If you don't got one, you got to get one. Meanwhile, like a week ago, we had someone with the flattest ass I've ever seen. Whom? This guy, Maurice, who was on like about a week ago or so. Anyway, yeah. You know what? Good luck, Maurice out there. Well, Baris isn't here.

Buck tango is here. That's right. Yeah. But to be honest, I didn't like Marisi. Okay, okay, cool, cool, cool. If I can just unpack that for a second, which guests do you like? Yes, Scott. Look, even the ones who have been on several times, I don't even like that.

Sure, sure, sure. Kayla Dickie. Kayla Dickie's okay. Yeah, maybe. I don't know. Let me think of some more. Now, Buck, you brought, do you want to do you want to do? a demonstration. Do you want to show us what this

MEC can do? Well, I showed up in it. I'm in it. Oh, you're in it right now. Okay, so this is a you can't. You're wearing a three-piece suit right now. Well, yeah, it's under, it's underneath. Oh, okay. So you've got a tailored suit over your MEC? Exactly. I didn't want to oh, by the way, real quick, can I tell you guys

about my sexy Halloween costume? Oh, yeah. I was a bicycle and Francesco was Dean of Vito. Okay, I was I was an optimist prime. I was really in the mech zone. So I was like, I had, you know, robots on the brain. And so when I transformed, though, I'm not at a car. I'm just a huge rod.

Just a huge piece. So you're optimist pride that transforms into a dick. Yeah, that's right. A dildo or like a fleshy dick? This is a good question, Scott. Thank you for asking. No, great question. It did, yeah, it, I grew, I grow flesh.

I'll throw on the outside. It flips inward and then it becomes, yeah. So flesh on the inside. So every piece just flips. Yeah. So you can imagine. 180 degrees. Yeah, what I'm a robot for.

I'd rather know. That does it sound like my husband Keith. Oh. I can tell that you... It's so big. It's waving. Francesca, if you keep rolling your eyes that hard, you are going to break them. Okay.

So, yeah. Yeah, do you want to do a demo of this? I mean, there's not a whole lot to it. It's just, it's an exoskeleton. So it acts as part of your body, but mechanical. So I... Okay. So do you want to take off your suit and show us what it looks like?

Yeah, I'll just, you know, it's a sort of tear away suit. I'll just tear away suit. Oh, okay, yeah. There we go. Billy Flynn style. Yeah, I don't have time. Oh, you know, can I ask, it's clear and plastic. Yeah, yeah.

And you're not wearing anything underneath. Okay. I mean, it doesn't count as clothes. You can't wear clothes underneath the mex. How is it supposed to interface to your neural system if you wear clothes? You look so old. Dash, thank you. What happened?

Well, at least paint it. I also got to say, it looks like the way it's connected to your neural system is through you squatting and those wires coming out of your butto. Yeah, it just looks like you're squatting again. Okay, interesting. Where would you plug in a me? I just don't know. I guess you only have so many holes. Yeah, I got...

Maybe the ears? Was it your bottle power the whole thing? Well, it doesn't power the whole thing. It goes into that's the only way I can get to the nervous system. I guess in the matrix they drill the hole in the back of the head and they attach that thing, you know, but... I misremembered that. Oh,

you just thought they used it in the butthole? I forgot. I remember when Keanu was in the goo. He was naked. Yeah, he's nude in the goo, and he's very frail in this part of the movie. By the way, I think that goo came from him. You think the goo came from him. Yeah, I think he was...

Like he brought his own goo from home, I didn't know. Where did he get it? Well, we can't say to you, but he just... Maybe there's the champagne talking. I'd rather put it up my butt than have someone drill a hole in the back of my neck. I don't have a butt hole, so I don't know. What? This is Francesca.

That's crazy. I know women have no but all. Oh, okay. I didn't. Women have no butthole or? I had heard that before. That makes sense. That tracks for me.

I have the only woman here. I'm the only one who know that. That's true. You know what? We got to believe women. We got to believe women. I did try to grab some other women very difficult. Also, do all the men.

Maybe try to not grab them. You know what? Let's not isolate what I just said. Now, Dash. Thank you for finishing the me. You're welcome. You're back to Dash. How you're done with Buck.

Buck, thank you for finishing the meck before Speed Force Thanksgiving. Very similar names, by the way. Almost as yours was inspired by him. I wouldn't say that. Names are similar. Some names are similar to the name. I don't think they share a single letter. No.

No, but like the the syllables and the way you say them, Dash grab them. Buck tango. Okay. Yeah. Sean Diston also is in there. That's a name of that. I had to meet that guy. Yeah. That sounds interesting guy.

One of my favorite actor. You're talking first syllable, one syllable name, two syllable, second. I'm near a more. You're hammered. Go to bed. You know what? You could curl up. You know what?

Maybe have a little more rare candy. That'll set you straight. So my device. Okay. Now, Buck, thank you for finishing the Beck, but did you bring the pumpkin pies and stuff that I asked you to make? Yeah, I'm so hungry right now. I don't know what it is about this candy, but it's like, I'm fucking starving. So the mech is supposed to help me in the kitchen, sort of.

I'm not a very good, inept cook, so I was going to, you know, put the exoskeleton on and get to baking, but I forgot all my ingredients. Oh, God. Did the suit pick other things in the kitchen that it thought was ingredients? I brought a whisk, one whisk. Okay. I brought an air fryer. It's not really helpful for when making a pie.

You probably could make a pie in there. I guess we could put some of this candy in there. some of that in the whiskered stuff if you need stuff. What else did you bring for your kitchen? Oh, what else did I bring? I brought the microwave. Oh, wow. I brought an empty ice cube tray.

I brought the Britta filter. We don't have any... Just the filter only not the... Yeah, we don't have any food to put that stuff into or put... And so none of that's edible, huh? Yeah, yeah. No. What kind of food would you put in fucking Brita filters, Scott?

Soup, you got filter soup. Francesca, you got to get out of Scott's face. Get it back to his purest in form water. For the listeners, Francesca, Francesca jumped up on Scott's knee and started getting into his face. By the way, like, we took the candy and we were pretty cool. I'm pretty chilled. She's got worse.

What's up with you, Francesca? Now I am in on Scott's shoulders, giving him a massage. God, you look like the angel or devil. Yeah, stop switching sides. Am's changing costume. She said I am good. He said I am bad. Say on the bad time.

Now, Buck, I mean, this is a... I got a... say you were supposed to bring it home here I thought that I know there's not a lot to me there's sort of you know we've exhausted our questions yeah there's not a lot for me to you're a guy who makes a mech we're not interested in the mech and that's it yeah you look like you have wires

coming out of your butthole and a clear meck costume and even that and even that's not enough yeah I have a question yes for a jessica think that maybe your personality is so lacking that you thought you need the meck or you know maybe you're using a mech to cover up or your personality you sound like my mom

exactly I added questions around here nobody else no other interview and that's what I'm saying in a nice in a maternal way she does say that maybe your personality you think you got to build this mech

so people like you you're great on your own and I say shut up mom but now I'm hearing it for you it's starting to change my tune a little bit so maybe you don't need a stupid meck. Yeah. Well, I worked really hard.

How do we build a meck for your personality? Yes. What do we have to do? An emotional mech. Oh. I don't mean to be a devil's half a fucking here, but where I'm from, mech solve a lot of problems. Okay.

That can only be solved by megs. Where are you from exactly? I'm in the Cantor region. Yeah. Maybe you should go live there. I wouldn't mind a change of scenery, you know? Yeah. I mean, your mom probably couldn't go.

Oh. Oh. Well. Yes. That fuck you. loves his mom. I don't really does. I think it's cute how much he loves his mom. I told you. I got I got to bring my home with me. You are bitch made. That's what that cursive tattoo on your arm says. It's, uh, I'll cross my knuckles too.

Bitch made. Right. Right. Bitch made. Now, you know what, Scott? I feel like I've, I've failed you so far, Scott. I've brought some guests and they're great, of course, but they're not the caliber of guests for a thing. No. We got, let's bring this home. We got to get to, we got a What is happening here? You know what? It kind of sucks that you're talking shit about us right to our face. Okay, you know what, Scott? I have an idea.

I don't think I could pull someone from your past, Scott. Oh. I need to pull someone from an alternate dimension, Scott. Oh, an alternate dimension. Okay, like the multiverse? Yes, Scott. Another dimension? Like a Hawaiian region?

No, no. Like a dimension where is only Bad Bath and Beyond. Well, look, there's, that exists. The beyond part. Like, it's the things you know, but everything's Hawaiian. But no, Scott. There was a guest.

Why he only talked to Scott? Because it's kind of the only way to keep this character go. I don't say my name. Even not he responded to Scott. Francesca asked him the question. Thank you, Francesca. But Scott. I think there's someone that you want to see that

recently was banned from the show well if they've been banned from the show they can't be on the show anymore so you know you know who can be Scott his counterpart in CBB World 2 oh the parallel CBB world that's right Scott we know that

there are in minor differences yes that's right Scott we know that there are infinite CBB worlds and in CBB World 2 it's exactly the same but this guest is not banned from the show that's the only difference in CBB World 2 that's right Scott. Also, yes, and also

Barack Obama was president for 12 years. Oh, awesome. Pretty great. He FDR did. He totally FDRD it. But I'm going to bring him, Scott. Okay, you didn't disappear. You're just taking your shit right now. Yeah, hold up. What a mess. Oh, God. Okay.

All right, okay. I can't do that. You know what, Scott? I feel like the only way to pull him from the other dimension is if we all go to sleep. You're all asleep. Fallen asleep Here in the Speed Force You're asleep

And at his eye, Morpheus Oh my God, Morpheus? The Lord of Dream Morpheus, the Lord of Dreams Morpheus 2 Morpheus from CBB World 2 Morphus so CBB World 2 But my name there is

Morpheus 2 Oh, more children when they speak Is that T-O-O? Yes Is there a first one? Not here, it's a confusing name It implies It implies that there was things before, but those things shall not be spoken of.

God, Morphiates, it's so good to see you. So good to see. You got voted off of the show by... So I heard. Not me. Oh, a different Morpheus. Right. Yeah.

There are several dream lords, one for each aspect of the universe. And whenever one of them perishes or is voted off in a survivor-like game show, they have to upload their files to Dropbox and then the other Morphy eye. Okay. Lead the Dropbox files and catch up. So I've read all about what happened to original Morpheus. Not only that, I went down a real rabbit hole of like CBB episodes. Oh, that's great.

Oh, okay. What do you think? The ones before 600 are a little dicey. They're not worth going into, I don't think. But I had a good old time. Made some corrections on the wiki. You know, would it be cool if we just treated you like the Morpheus dream lord we knew? Not worry about any sort of differences

and pretend like I was the same person. Yeah. Line with me. Okay. That's great. But wait a minute. Are we in a dream right now? You are in a dream of the speed force.

I can only be seen by people who are asleep. I only exist in people's dreams. Did you, by the way. If you see me, you are dreams. Is that hard? Were people... What's that? Is that hard?

For me? Because what if you want to like have a birthday party? But everyone weighs that. That's what I can only have people who are sleeping come to my birthday party. Thank you, young man. That is very empathetic of you to appreciate.

Oh, Morpheus, this is dash, grab them. Dash, this is more. I know Dash well, I know from his dreams. But the dash of CBB world, too. Yes, it's not you. Okay. I love an unbothered spirit. Were people dreaming on October the 31st this year?

Yes, why do you ask? Oh, I just wondering if you dressed up at all. Oh, yes, I'm dressed up right now. Oh, you're still dressed up. Yes, yes, yes. You don't recognize my costume? No, who are you? I can't quite place it.

Maybe things are different on CBB world, too. That could be, yes, it could be different. I am, let's see, sexy, sexy Bugs Bunny. Okay. So sexy Bugs Bunny, but a sexier version of that? Well, no, the two sexies cancel each other out, and I'm just regular BugsBuddy. Sexy, sexy Bugs Buddy is just regular Bugs Bunny. You're not even wearing the dress that Bugs Bunny wore.

Well, it doesn't make any sense. Once you put on a second dress and they cancel each other out and you're just back to regular bugs Bunny. That's why I have the ears. You see the ears. Yeah. Okay. That's why you have the ears.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I thought that was just Morpheus's thing that he had bunny ears or something. Well, also you're wearing your cloak and it's, you know. Oh, yes, sir, let me move my hood back. Yeah. Yes, I didn't even think. There you are, yeah. Morpheus, this is Francesca Bolonaisi.

Oh, greetings. Hey, and they're so nice to meet you. You are asleep, young lady. I hope that doesn't bother you. That's why. That fucking creepy thing. You caused me. Have we talked about this?

I wouldn't appreciate that for, I don't think that's right. What's the Bill Cosby of CBB World 2 doing? It's worse. Oh, shit. You don't want to know. Shit. He's not only, he did all the things he did here and his old albums are bad. Oh, no.

There's just nothing with people. That sucks. You know what you mean? It's like not, it's not even the art and the other situation. That shit sucks. It's actually better for everything else. That actually makes it easier, yeah. Wasn't that hot to cancel the guy.

But that's why Francesca, you'll see here you are 10, feet tall because you are the person of your dreams. Well, but I actually am realizing I don't want to be this tall. I like being small. This is a nightmare for you. It seems like a contrarian spirit is what I'm picking up on. I sort of feel like I gave you a heart's

desire and you're kind of bummed about it. I'm stupid to me because part of the reason actually that me and my husband Keith are soul. Do you not like him? Yeah, this is just how he says. I only know of him from your dreams of him. He is a love of my life.

I love him so much. But the way that we have sex is like going through his pocket. And then I do all the stuff to his dick. His dick is so big. What is it? Like two inches? He's a two. No, one in a three quarter.

Oh, my God, huge. He's a massive bigger than yours. Yeah, okay. Yeah, for sure. Anyway, so yes, for me now I'm kind of rethinking. How do I have sex with my husband? Well, this is only in your dreams. And you wake up, you'll be back in your regular bio.

Oh, thank God. Okay. Is it okay if I ask a couple of questions about pop culture? Because I only know TV and movies when people dream about that. Right. And it's confusing. Oh, okay. So when I get it...

Sometimes when I dream about a movie, I dream about the way I want to be, not the way it actually it is. Those are the only movies that I can watch. Right. Yeah, ask us anything. Okay, there's a television show, and it's got something to do with poor people in Korea

competing in a murderous game for money. Yeah. Parasite. Maybe, perhaps. Yes, it sounds like a class. It's a lot of confidence. Commentary on class people Squid game

Oh man that sounds right It could be that But everybody is a grandmother And they're naked the whole time Oh I mean you're thinking of a squid game But but I think someone's mixing up Mixing up their own grandmother into it Is it good?

I can't stop watching it You know I keep thinking it's moving too slow But I binge right through it The squid game I saw is when a tentacle and a tentacle And a tentacle play water polo together Okay Yes I've seen that episode So you've dreamed about that, but it's pinpoint accuracy.

No, that's not a dream. That's the real squid game that I watched. Right, yeah, but you've dreamed about it if he's seen it. Oh, yes, I guess so. I mean, it was quite a match. Sorry. Not at all. Sorry.

You know what, Dash's had... After they'd say anything, she'd say, sorry. Yeah. Dash has had a little to drink tonight. It was a little... I had a haul of the champagne bottle. But Morpies... Good for you. Good for you.

A man without vice is a man without virtue. No, Morpies... Sorry. You live in the dream dimension, of course. Correct. What is it? I administer the dream dimension. You administer the dream dimension.

It is my responsibility. It is so creepy. It's like a live work situation. That's correct. What is your relationship with the holiday of Skanksgiving? Deep and intimate. You celebrate my favorite holiday. Skanksgiving is my favorite holiday.

Interesting. Yes, that's right. Do people have very vivid dreams on Skanksgiving? Skanksgiving is when we are closest to the dream world. Whoa. Dressing in sexy costumes for a moment. month brings us ever so close to our primal thoughts and desires.

Skanksgiving is a sacred time in the dream scape. And the triptophan from the turkey probably helps too, huh? Oh yeah, everyone's asleep. You know it, pal. But what are the traditions of us skanksgiving? Is that hard for a... Tiny Italian? You're temporarily

big, so it'd be easy for you now. Thanksgiving. What are the traditions is the same as a Thanksgiving? No, no, very different. For skanksgiving, you go around and say what your most slutty for. Oh man. Okay, okay.

So that's a little bit different. You dressed, of course, you're dressed in a sexy Halloween costume. Sure, yeah. That way, that way, we haven't talked about our costumes. No, no, dear. No, I mean, I'm, I'm sexy Native American, obviously. Oh, I mean, the feathered headdress, uh, around my ass. Uh-huh.

Well, there's several things that could ruin you in that costume back to you. No, Scott's uncancelable. Here, the speed force, he's unconsolable. What are you, though? I can't quite tell. I am sexy Scott Rockerman. Oh, okay. I wondered, the sweater, the G-string.

Painting all those old, old lines on your face. Yeah, exactly. That's why your dick is so small. Well, yeah, exactly. That is why my dick is so small. It does seem you went out of your way to let us know that you have a small dick in that costume. There's like the little outline on the pants. I had to go all out.

But another holiday of Skanksgiving is to play ska bands, who like to skank. So it's only ska music on skanksgiving. Like, which ones? Let's see. Methascafeles. Are we talking second wave, third wave? Well, in the dreamscape, it's only the dreams of these ska bands.

Oh, okay. All waves would be welcome, but also just the dreams of them. Like a pie tasters? Are they a band? So in you there? Or are you just dreaming about people tasting pie? Is that the thing we're the studdiest for? I know I didn't bring my pie, so don't rub it in everyone's face, okay?

I also do have some delicacies that are only existed in dreams. Oh, I love that. I'm so hungry right there. It's not like turkey or... I'm surprised we went to sleep. We had so much of that rare candy. Yeah, but you know what?

I'm fucking... I know that my body is twitching right now. I'm grateful for it because I wouldn't be able to see unless you were unconscious. Here's a delicacy. This has not existed except since the old times.

Prehistory delicacies. Whoa. These only exist in people's dreams? Yes, that have been talked about and passed down through oral history. Through the oral tradition. That's correct. So they only live in very few people's dreams, but I have it for you here.

This is... Let us add it. What is it? Banana bread. Oh, no, we... No, we... Maybe it's different on CBB1, too. Banana bread.

Okay, yeah, Dash don't have that. The most exotic of desserts here. Probably only in ancient Persia, the oldest of the... No, we... It's not curry at all. It's not curry. It's not curry. Okay, well, enjoy the breakfast.

Banana bread. Thanks. No, we have it. We have that kind of thing. Sort of the mech of treats. All right. No problem. This shit that's a bit better beyond bed better and banana bread.

By the way, this tastes like wood chips right now. The way banana bread is supposed to be in dreams. All right. Here's a second delicacy. This is an ancient one from an undersea kingdom whose records have been lost to modern time. Oh, okay. Mike and Ike's candy.

Okay. Little boxes pass them around. Wait, Mike and I were Atlantian? I mean, yes. Mike and Ike were Atlantean. This is a delicacy. Only the kings and queens of Atlantis would enjoy Mike and Ike. We have these.

These are pretty shitty gummy cubes. Oh, they're not good. Okay. Okay. Can you, Dash, can you calm down? Everything you bring out, Dash, is just going nuts for. I mean, he's having a great time. We're all good.

Okay, Dash. You're welcome. Just take them and re-gift them if you need or whatever. All right. I don't think I can even give these away, honestly. Yeah, I can't either. You guys really are open with what you think about things in front of people. but all right, no problem.

Final delicacy. Just enjoy. This only existed before there were humans, before there were living creatures on Earth. This is going to be some present-day bullshit. Like a fossil? Like a fossil. Like a caboose.

That's correct. This is a tuna noodle casserole. Oh, God. These things are so much. This one sucks. Okay, I got to throw this shit back into the speed force. All right. Well, just think of it.

He's a dasha. He's mad at you. You take some Campbell's, you know, crev of mushroom. Oh, God. You take some Campbell's soup in this? Yeah, yeah. You ruined the soup and the tuna. Oh my God, Buck.

It looks like you're throwing up inside your bag. It's a real fucking mess in here. I'm sorry it's clear. That's fucking disgusting. It's nice to see you anyway. I asked you to bring. I asked you to bring. Thanksgiving dinner.

Yes. And this is the bullshit that you... This is the finest delicacies. Yeah, two or three. You know what, Morpheus? I'll allow you to continue to live in our own universe from today on. Oh, I love it. Morpheus has returned.

I would respect in continuity. Yeah, I would love it if he came back to CBB World One with us. I mean, I'd like to have Morpius back on the show. Morpius, well, we'll bring you back to CBB World One, but I got to say, you didn't deliver today. Yeah. I appreciate your honesty. And you are welcome in the dreamscape

Anytime you sleep All right I mean that's kind of your job I can't really have You're welcome to going to bed bath and beyond Anytime you want to go Yeah Still you're welcome here

You're welcome here Scott please no We don't want you there You're all welcome here Can we wake up? Yeah yeah let's do it Okay Oh my god

That was a crazy dream You're back of sleep real quick Okay Just I'm gonna keep listening And whenever I want to talk You'll just fall asleep You're awake you're awake You're awake

you wait back to sleep for just like two seconds it felt like Scott I'm so sorry because it's coming towards the end of speed force Thanksgiving right now and I feel like I'm so hungry for companionship there's no food there's I mean there's a motley crew of yeah I'm gonna say weirdos here some of the worst guests I've ever had on the show I unfortunately also puked in real life yeah you mama cast this you know what Scott maybe I was Scott, you know, I think I might have been thinking about this all wrong, Scott. I've been here trying to make you be thankful for things in your past, Scott. Okay, I can see where you're going with this.

Maybe. We're ending it now? No, no, no, no, no, no, no. What I was going to say is, oh, okay, there's more. There's more. Maybe, Scott, you could be thankful for guests from the future, Scott. Okay. You mean, meaning guests I haven't even met yet?

Yes, Scott. You know, because I have the powers of the flesh, I can run into the future, Scott. Oh, of course, yes. Well established. I have seen the future of comedy, bang, bang. Oh, my God. Is it good? Am I canceled?

I don't want to really get into the details of that. Okay. Yeah, you're kind of canceled. I'm kind of canceled. That's fine. Everyone will be. By that point, everybody's canceled. We're all walking around.

It's all good. Was it the Halloween constant? Yeah. Really? So I'm canceled immediately? Scott, I'm going to travel into the future and bring one of your favorite guests that you haven't even met yet, Scott. Okay, great.

Are you ready? Yeah. All right, I don't think I have to take a shit again. Okay, you're feeling light? You can travel to the future? Here we go, yeah. Actually, you know what? I might just walk.

Let me just... Okay, yeah, if you can get there by walking, why are you following? I'll be right back, y'all. Okay. Oh, shit. Walk is still hurt, too. Okay. I cramped up a little bit

when I was on my way back. Damn, Scott. Ooh, okay. I had to stay at a hotel halfway. That shit sucked. But, Scott, I brought your favorite guest, Scott. His name, Ron Snapper.

Scott. Ron Snapper. That's right, Scott. Ron Snapper. This is like a taste of what's to come. Of CBB World Future. I'm a taste of your future, Scott. It's me, Ron Snapper.

Nice to meet you. Hello. Hi. Strange. Strange to be meeting you. when I've already met you so many times. This is like a Doctor Who, you know, River situation. I don't know what you're talking about.

They don't have Doctor Who in the future? No, I just don't know. I just don't know what that is, okay? You're very, you're coming in so hot, even hotter than Ruby. Well, this is how we got to make it in the podcast world. Okay, I know a little something about podcasting. I am, of course, the host of podcast rescue. This is the preeminent podcast rescue reality show.

It plays exclusively on those TVs at gas stations. Oh, okay. Okay. Okay. So that's your deal. That's correct. Yeah. If you want to encapsulate it and one short little soundbite, that's my deal. Is that how you met Scott? That is how I met Scott. But I've had you, wait, I met you and then had you on the show or I met you? No, no, no. You were ambushed by me. Oh. You were hosting a normal edition of your show. Okay. I first appeared on your show sometime in late 2021, maybe early 2022, whichever is most convenient for this time.

okay running out of runway in regards to that you know who knows and 2022 is looking tight maybe a little optimistic for you as well

got it got it was convenient for you Scott yeah who knows but who knows who knows what it is but yeah I mean who knows what can happen

I can people can drop out of course what happened was a lot of your past guests and producers contacted me they said

Scott is running one of the worst podcasts and podcasts this is a true shit show was what one guest said God, why would Devin do this?

Was the guest me that's... I don't know what you're talking about. Yeah, my producer, it was. It was Francesca. I assume I am still on the show. That's correct. Yes, okay. Yes.

In fact, all of these guests are my recon spice. I sent them in a head to be guests on this podcast, experience it from the guest chair and figure out just how terrible it was. Go ahead, go ahead, everyone. Tell them what a terrible time you've had on this show. You told me I was... What was the word? Opeak.

I did. Yeah. I don't even know what that means, barely. Me neither, but it sounded like there was malice behind it. Yeah, yeah. Well, I'll attribute the time that I had on the show to it being a trick for you. That's what happened. Yeah, I had a bad time.

Well, I mean, you sucked, though. No, no, it's not that. Yeah, I sucked because the experience was bad. Listen to how you're talking to these guests, Scott. You're all asleep. You're all asleep. Okay. I actually had a great time because I wanted to come to this university.

Yeah, it kind of worked out. I did agree to spy, and I was, you know, he had a dream and asked me. But then I was like, you know, Morpheus was an outlier. We cut his footage out of the episode because I didn't really support the narrative. You got to kill your darlings. Okay, you're awake. That's right. Oh, yeah.

So I was called to bring. I was brought in to save your podcast. May I say your deal, if I may be so bold, is very complicated right off the bat. I would strip out, like, suddenly you've hired spies and like, we have any. even establish really what podcast rescue is. Podcast Rescue is a show where I rescue podcasts. I come in. I am one of the great producers of podcasts of all time.

I'm in the Podcast Hall of Fame. You are? I am. There's a podcast Hall of Fame? There's a podcast Hall of Fame. Who's on Mount Podmore in the future? Well, of course, it is the podfather himself, Ricky Jervase. Oh, okay.

Conan's up there. Conan is up there. Dax Shepard, who I was the one who convinced Timmy was interesting. The office ladies. The office ladies are. there but Scott Scott I got good news from where I'm sitting in 2036 you're on Mount Podmore right now yes really that's right so there's a big Mount Podmore it's there's how many heads or there's about 25 heads whoa okay I've only scratched the surface on the

head where is this Budmore a Minosola wow the derogatory tone yeah it's in Minneapolis oh yeah dead on well how did you fix this podcast because maybe we could get a heads up on it right now. No, this would be a good time because what I came in and I gave my signature tough love and I burst in your studio and screamed at you at the top of my lungs. This sounds like a terrible episode. It has

to happen. It was a great episode. People loved it. Highly reviewed. And I went on to become your most frequent guest of all times. Okay. I mean, look, I believe it if you're saying it. What I lie to you? You need to open your ears

and accept the truth. This is just the beginning. I don't think he's a liar, Scott. Scott, where your podcast is at right now, you're losing $820,000 a month. I'm losing money doing the podcast? You're losing $820,000 about this podcast, okay? From lack of efficiency, okay? Really, it's just efficiency. Lack of efficiency.

Shottie works with Shipp, okay? Failure to focus. But we've never lost money before, and I've been shoddy this whole time. Yeah, well, you made some bad investments, and I think Rudy might have taken, written a couple checks in your name. I did. I'm sorry about that. Oh, you're writing bad paper. Rudy.

Yeah, I'm writing bad paper. I didn't take one of those classes. You got to take a class. So what did you do? How did you turn it around? We don't want to spoil the episode, but no. Of course, we don't want to spoil the episode because that's what? Bad podcasting, okay?

Okay. Yeah. You want to keep that. Okay. No, here's what I did. I came in and I offered my tough love. I gave you some some guidelines of like, you know, for example, first of all, did you check any of these people's IDs before they came in for?

No, I haven't even thought about doing that. You didn't check a single ID. What am I checking for? A 13-year-old said you got no idea. What would be wrong with that? I don't know. Hold on. Maybe we should check everybody's IDs.

Check everybody's ideas. Francesca, can I see your idea real quick? Oh, you didn't want to see my ID? No. So no? No. Okay. Which she said no.

What are we supposed to do? That's it. Then you just got to ask. You're only liable for asking. You just got to check and ask and they go, no, thank you. Is that the same like legal for bars? Like, they just got to ask you, you say no. This one trick that everyone in a bar hates.

If you, it's, you go up. They say, can I see your ID? You go, that's actually a violation of HIPAA. Oh, HIPAA, God. Always using HIPAA. Now, Dash, can I see your ID, please? Uh-huh. Here's the Pokedex.

Okay, I don't know what the fuck is. This is a digital ID that tells us about all the Pokemon I caught and also my name. I'm 12. Yeah, he's 12. Is that cool that he's cool? 12 is cool, as long as he has an ID that I can read. And I'm drunk and on those kids. And that's something I, that's some of the tough love I got to get.

give you got a root full of people snorting cocaine on skanks gimmicks this is cocaine i thought this was rare candy rare candy did you bring any of course i brought some but only i could do it because i'm not on the clock i can't feel my stomach you got a you got a one-foot tall woman who can't feel her stomach you're all asleep oh we're asleep now somebody wanted to see my identification i guess yeah i don't have traditional identification. What is this? This is a furry creature called a Grouse. Oh, okay. Do we ask it? Yeah, he speaks to true names and identities of whoever you thought. Okay, who was your master? Let's Morpheus. Okay. Okay. Thank you, Grouth, and you're all

awake. I got to accept that as an idea. Is that okay? That's an okay idea, but God, I mean, listen to how fractured we are. The canon is all over the place. By the way, Grouth came, he's here. Groutth is now a guest on the show. He should only exist. This episode was already running out of steam when you brought in the fifth guest. Now you bring it into sixth.

What the hell is going on? You're right. You're right, Ron. We need you. I can see why I've had you on the show so many times. Exactly. I'm a creature and a big fan. I'm a fan of the cast.

See, now this is great because this is enthusiasm. This gets into what we got to do to turn this podcast around, okay? All right, let's get into it. To turn this podcast around, I got to hear catch phrases. I haven't heard a single goddamn catchphrases. Those are my groceries.

Boom. Those are my groceries. That is a white hot catchphrase. That's going to take you very far, Graves. Very good job. Hey, appreciate it. You're welcome. Okay.

Well, does anyone else, I mean, I could, like... And if none of you got a catchphrase locked and loaded, there's the door. I think of mine will be... Is that your catchphrase, by the way? That's what? There's the door? Scott, if you don't like the catchphrases, I bring it into the show, there's the door. Okay, it works.

It's pretty good. It works. It's pretty good. It works. Every time I say that, my listenership goes up 12%. That's incredible. 12%. Some people are listening extra hard when you say that.

That's correct. If anyone's got what, Francesca? I think mine would be, oh, no, no, my tommy. Oh, yeah. It's good. It's good. You know what? It's a different energy than a lot of catchphrases.

It's a lot lower, a lot softer. It's going to drop listeners in. For me, those are my groceries. See? You can hit it as many times as you want. You ever don't know what to say, there's the door. You know, you just hit that. I think mine's going to be, I catch that.

Nice. A little sassy. I think you might be deciding a little drunk right now. Also, it sounds like you're on like an STD billboard or something like that. Yeah, I mean, a what? You got an adult man talking to a 12-year-old child about STDs. What the hell is going on? Okay, you're right.

Sorry, sorry, sir. It was okay. Do I tell you, sir? You call me, sir. Yes, we're very close friends, but you call me, sir. It's hierarchy is so important. Okay, well, you're very high status. I know this.

Well, now, Buck, do you have your catchphrase lock? It's a little long. Okay, listen to. Wait, is that it? That's, yeah, that's, speaking about the court that has to go up my ass to power the... I like this. This is good. So it's like, when it comes to the cord that's up my ass right now, it's a little long.

It's a little long. You got a guy with a cord up his ass in the middle of his studio. That's unsanitary. That's a health code violation. Don't forget, I'm covered in barred. That's probably bad, dude. That's disgusting. Can I say something?

Yes. Okay, in my opinion, being on this podcast has been so bad. It's been a lot of things that I would have changed about it for you. But I want to say for them, maybe you could give them advice that they need to be nice to us. We're your guests. You guys being mean to us the whole time. Oh, I need someone better. You know what?

Francesca, you're right. Wow. Wow, that is your catch right now. I don't think that. I don't know if that one's going to stick. I think I'll still be looking for one of the time. But Francesca, I have to say, you know, and Rudy, I'm going to bring you in on this as well. Skingsgiving is a time for people to look around at all the sluts that he's around and really just realize that, yeah, maybe we've had our differences when you've been on the particular episode.

but those differences are what make the show really interesting and fun. And yeah, maybe we don't get along and I don't find any of you interesting, but... Wow, grouse, that hurts grouse. But the guests do. And you know what, this Thanksgiving, I just want to say that I apologize if I've treated you poorly. And I'm so glad that all of you are here. Wow. Wow.

Scott, thank you. And I'm sorry if I'm confusing for you to listen to sometimes. Because that's not your fault. I'm old. I'm an old-ass man. I get it. And yeah, I don't know what a mech is. I don't know what a Pokemon is. But, you know, five-year-olds probably do. And I could use some five-year-old listeners. So thank you guys. Yeah, if I can apologize, I'm sorry that there's just not more to who I am as a person. Yeah, you were pretty thin. Physically and just in terms of conceptually. Yeah, absolutely. Grouse wants to apologize for shoehorning himself at the end here when, you know,

Nobody expected him. To be honest, I pimped you into that. And I told you that you were here and then you just were. Grouse appreciates it. Grouse wants more time on the cast. I would like to catch Grout. No, no, you can't catch Grout. Not on Skagit.

No, not on Skagit. You know what? I want to apologize to Scott because I think I have been so much funnier than you the whole time. And it must be so hard for you. And I'd never thought about it from your perspective. Franceschi, you're right. in the skanksgiving tradition I'll accept your apology

but next time I see you again and I'd like to apologize as well for coming in with a gimmick about as aggressive as possible and for really you know coming in hot it's okay but I mean you know on skanksgiving we want people to be hot

that reminds me should I tell you what my Halloween costume oh yeah please yeah we didn't cover that oh it's no big deal it's just in honor of my favorite podcast the Legion of Skanks I'm a sexy Oh, no. I'm a sexy Big J. Okers.

Oh, shit. Sexy year. That's right, yes. It mainly just Big J without the pants. Okay. So that's your favorite podcast, is Leisure of Skags, huh? Look at their numbers. Tell me they're not doing great.

Okay. All right. And Rudy, most of all, I just want to say, I really appreciate you. I know that this may be, you know, not the group of guests that I wanted, but I think it's the group of guests that I needed. That's right. And thank you so much, Rudy. You've been such a great friend to me.

and I apologize I've been spending so much time with Sprague and I started a different... I don't know if you know

this but we started a different show together. Say what now? I apologize. You know, watching old movies that talking about them

are you? Yeah, just like every other podcast. Scott, that was our thing. We talked about that at Speed Force Thanksgiving four years ago.

Sorry, but then you disappeared. But look, Rudy, I want to, I want to reestablish our relationship and Thanksgiving here. It wouldn't be possible without you.

So thank you so much. Well, thank you so much, Scott, and to all our guests Listen, Scott, I just have one important question for you. Did you have a good time, Scott? You know what, Rudy? Oh, should we get the turkey before I?

Oh, yeah, let me go get the turkey. What am I thinking over here? Not getting the turkey. Scott, I'm going to go get this turkey. Put a pin in my answer. Put a pin in your answer. I mean, I was going to say yes, but let's have the turkey first. Let me go check out of the turkey.

You know what? I bring a lot of turkey with me from Bedbaden. I don't want to... I actually have a good turkey, Francesca. Rudy's been cooking this all for the past five years. I have some loose turkey jerky in my pockets. No, don't need that shit, because I'm married to this turkey for a decade. Grouse is turkey.

You're turkey? Yeah. If you want to eat me, I'll just be recreated. Okay, you know what? I have a turkey. Okay. And we can all have this turkey. Let me just go check on it in the kitchen.

Okay, yeah, great. No! No! No! Oh, my God. Oh, no. Rudy, everything okay? Scott.

Scott. Rudy, are you taking another shit? No, Scott. I, um, about the turkey. I, um... Yeah, my mouth is watering. You just even bringing it up. Francesca.

Dash, Buck, Morpheus. What's his name? Ron. Oh, right. I forgot to turn on the oven, Scott. What? Oh, no.

You did what? That's right. I don't have a turn. turkey. We're all starving here and you forgot to turn on the fucking oven. Scott, I'm picking up a little rhyme there. There's the door.

Scott, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I didn't make the turkey, but it still was fun, right? I mean, we had guests. We celebrated stuff. We were thankful. This is the worst Thanksgiving I've ever had in my life. I hated it.

I'm out of here. Scott. Well, wow. It looks like the only way for me to save the CBB world averse is to merge my cannon with the speed force. Jesus Christ. That's what makes sense. What is the matter with you?

How is that related to what is this happened? It's so got ballooning. No, no, no. It makes perfect sense. I don't understand. No, no, you don't understand. The only way for me to save the speed force. Okay.

And Thanksgiving and the CBB world averse is if I'm, I merge with the speed force. It makes perfect sense. You can make it a mostly walk on. Why? That grouse doesn't understand. It's a little long. I'm just going to do it.

Okay. Okay. And here I go. Goodbye CBB world. Rudy North must die. So CBB world can live. It's like the end of people's dreams of the search of spot.

He was saying he's going to, like he's going to die. No, no. I think, right? Maitam. Thank you for listening to the Speed Force Thanksgiving special. This has been a Whisper Studios production in association with Brett Morris and CBBWorld.com.

Special thanks to Lily Sullivan, Zach Rayno, Matt Apodaca, Will Hines, Devinfield, and of course, Skorockerman. That's Cannon, baby. oh god wow so this is the speed force afterlife which is different than hell which i did kind of go to at one point became the devil but this is totally different it's a speed force afterlife well Looks like I have all of eternity to reflect on my dirtbag misdeeds. Rudy! Oh, cake boss!

My sponsor and mentor, what happened? Rudy, what have you done? I mean, I just saved the CBB Worldiverse by merging my cannon with the Speed Force. It's a long story, but I can't get into that right now. Rudy, by pulling guests from old episodes to shave our reality. You forever change their future Creating Branch CBB Timelines Branch CBB timelines

That's what I just said Oh no! Yeah, yeah, oh no, it's right I got bit by a cake lighting bug And I had a vision of the future Is it bad? No, it's good Yeah, that's why I can't

Of course it's bad Oh God We need to prepare There's a crisis coming A crisis Unfinite BangBerg! Bing!

Rudy North will return.