Comedy Bang Bang: The Podcast - Bonus Bang: Live From The Bell House Pt 1 (Hot 4 Scott)

Episode Date: September 18, 2025

This week we've reached the final episode in our "Hot 4 Scott" series, featuring Adam Scott. Recorded live at the Bell House in Brooklyn, NY, Scott is joined by Jason Mantzoukas, Adam Scott, Big Chunky Bubbles, John Lennon, and Silver Screen Sammy to celebrate the release of Comedy Bang! Bang! The Podcast: The Book. (Originally released as episode #808 on 4/22/23) Don’t forget to check out the Comedy Bang! Bang! Action Figures at shop.figurecollections.com and go to actionfigureseller.com for international purchases. If you want more great episodes of Comedy Bang! Bang! become a subscriber at comedybangbangworld.com. We have all of the past episodes from the archives, every live show, ad-free new episodes, and original shows like CBB Presents and Scott Hasn’t Seen. Find more great Comedy Bang! Bang! merch at https://www.podswag.com/collections/comedy-bang-bang Get access to all the podcasts you love, music channels and radio shows with the SiriusXM App! Get 3 months free using this show link: https://siriusxm.com/cbb Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Hey everyone, this is Scott Ackerman, and welcome to another bonus bang, where we are re-releasing great episodes of comedy bang-bang from behind the paywall. Now, this is your host, Scott Ackerman. I mentioned that already, but it's so nice. I had to say it twice. And we have reached the final episode in our series that we're calling Hot for Scott. Scott, you mean like me? No, of course, Adam Scott, our good friend, who we saw at the Emmys. I'm taping this in advance of the Emmys, but congratulations or I'm sorry to him. Sorry to this man. Either one, whatever applies. But we took this opportunity to re-release great episodes that he has been on with us.

Now, this week we're re-releasing the episode called Live at the Bell House Part 1. This was originally released April 25th, 2023 as episode 808. This is a live episode that we did for, the Comedy Bang Bang Book, which came out a couple years ago. And this is at the Bell House in Brooklyn, New York. It also features Jason Manzoukis. Paul F. Tompkins has big chunky bubbles. Mike Hanford as John Lennon and our good friend from Blank Check.

Griffin Newman as Silver Screen Sammy. And this is a very, very funny episode. Everyone's great in this. Now, if you enjoy it and you want to hear other fantastic episodes of Comedy Bang Bang, become a subscriber at cbbworld.com. We have all of the past episodes from the archives, every single live show we've done, add free new episodes,

and original shows like CBB Presents, and Scott hasn't seen. We're going to be back Monday with a new episode of Comedy Bang Bang, but until then, enjoy this bonus bang. Comey bye Comey back bye

Comey back bye Comey back bye Comey back New York City Thank you so much

Thank you Thank you so much Welcome to the bellhouse You can teach an old dog new tricks No, fucked it up already Fucked it up already. I feel like Chris Rock in his life special. You can't teach an old dog new tricks,

but you can smear peanut butter on it. Welcome to Comedy Bang Ben. Thanks to AJ. Hope that's AJ from the Sopranos. Just a stone's throw from here in New Jersey. People from Jersey here? and proud of it I have no idea

I've never been there thank you so much for coming to the show this is not only comedy bang bang but this is in celebration of comedy bang bang the podcast the book thank you did you all get a copy of the book

coming in here feel free now turn to page 65 in your hymnals. We're going to have fun celebrating the book here tonight. We have some contributors here from it, as well as one other guy. And by the way, now that you all were given something heavy coming in,

if at any point you don't like the show, feel free to throw the books at us and say, I don't like this. Totally get it. We do have a really great group here with us today. Some people, we are very proud of the book and hope you really enjoy it. And sincerely, I'm really happy that you guys

are interested enough to read it. And let's get to the show because we have some great people who contributed to it. What do you say? I think there are too many chairs out here. Don't expect seven. Two, three, four, five, six, seven.

Nope. All right, well, let's get to our first guest. He's not really a guest. more of a co-host for the show. You know him as one of the hosts of the How Did This Get Made Podcast? Please welcome Jason Manzukas. What's up, jerks?

How we doing, Brooklyn? That's right. Throw your books now! Hey Nong, man. Hey Nong, man. I've never seen you so amped. I love this side of you. That was it.

That's it. Okay, shut him down. That's all I had. Power down. Hey, pal. Hi, pal. So good to see. Ow!

Look at us in a... What? I cut myself on your nipple. It's so erect right now. Yeah. So happy to be back on stage. I'm so turned on by this. Very sexy crowd here in New York.

Hot crowd. Hot crowd. I asked them to put an extra seat for Elijah. Okay. Good. Who's doing Elijah tonight? You'll see. Jason's so good to see you. I'm thrilled to be here.

You were... I used to live right here at the Bell House. I don't care. What I was going to say... You go, your thing. it's good to have you on the East Coast because you were supposed to do some of the East Coast dates with us

on our tour last last summer and then what happened? I got COVID. Oh. Oh. After years spent hiding in my house, where you truly

barely came over to my house. No. And the first few times you deigned to come over to our house outside, you still wore a mask the entire time. And so you avoided it for the longest time. I did, and then we did the How Did This Get Made Tour?

Night 3 in Texas. Houston, Texas. Boy, did I get COVID. I just got full-blown COVID. Yeah. Yep. Had it gross. Had somebody had the had the nurse came to give me the test and a bunch of other,

stuff and I was like, you know, is this something that could have been avoided? Because the new booster was coming up, right? Oh, you hadn't even gotten that, yeah. There was a shot that was going to be out in two months or a month or something. I think I got it right after the tour, so yeah. And so I was like, would this have been

like, would I, am I just not have enough antibodies to quit, blah, blah, blah, if I went and got waited until that shot and she was like, I'm not the right person to ask. I don't really believe in vaccines. And I was like, Madam, you are a medical professional. You are here in scrubs.

So super quick, who here believes in vaccines? That's right. That's right. Not 100% agreement. I'm hesitant to ask the other question. Anybody here?

Not believe in vaccines? Cool. Hey. The bellhouse, baby. Well, you're here now. I'm so glad. Thrilled. Thrill to be here. Amir Stone. I used to live in Carroll Gardens and then... Oh, so back to your thing.

What's that? Oh, yeah, back to my thing. Go ahead. Boy, this neighborhood wildly different than when I lived here. When I lived here, there was a huge movement to stop Whole Foods from moving into this neighborhood. Now, having just driven here,

this neighborhood appears to be all Whole Foods? All Whole Foods all the time? I was like, what the fuck is going on? The people at the Park Slope, food co-op would not allow this. These are very local references. Local jokes. I appreciate you

bringing this to the crowd. I don't know. I don't know. What's going on with the glasses? They're coming on. They're going off. I'll be honest. I want to wear them to see better, but I didn't clean them backstage. Feel free to clean them right now.

I'm going to clean them in a minute when we're talking about talking else. Something else. Okay. Well, Jason, you When I leave stage, that's why. Scott, that's why. You have to do it backstage? I've got to go backstage. For what?

The little cloth. I don't want your cloth. Front row lady waving a cloth like she's surrendering to the bad guys. I don't need your cloth. I don't need your eyes schmuts on my eyes. These motherfucking New Yorkers are trying to give me pink eye. Nice try. You have your own special cloth devoted for this purpose.

Of course I do, Scott. Could someone find it, bring it out to you? No, I don't want them to. Because that would mean someone else touching the cloth. I don't want them touching my special cloth either. My special cloth. Tell the truth, is this your blankie from when you were a child? It's the last little scrap of blankie.

And it doesn't clean my glasses. It just scratches them to the point where they absolutely can't see through. How you've been? I've been good. And Jason, I wanted to thank you. Sorry. Am I not allowed to touch you? You can.

Okay. I wanted to thank you because you wrote something. Well, I mean, you didn't write something for the book. Sure, I did. Well, I mean, yes. Yes. Can we bring it up here on the screen? What Jason wrote?

This is the only time I will write anything that looks like I'm published in the New York. Yes. This is your real name, Jeffrey Karateaweides. Of course, and my real headshot from, I think, 2003? That sounds about right. When I think I took that picture. With a strange ring on my finger. I don't remember when I wore a ring, but I did.

So much so that I was like, I need it in my headshot. I identify with this ring. I think it was 2003 because normally the Twin Towers would have you in the shape. but there's never forget plenty of light plenty of light on you I heard someone go

shh lest you think here in New York we're going to shy away from 9-11 jokes we are all in but it was very nice

you wrote about I took this I took this on the top of building 7 controlled explosion Okay, now we're starting to lose people. Now this is the... Now we're starting to lose people.

Jet, fuel, can't melt, steal. All right. I'm just trying to get a sense of what this crowd's all about. Honestly, most of you are too young for 9-11, right? Yeah. You're one of the few pro-vaccine. 9-11 was an inside job type... I love the vaccine, mostly because I want Bill Gates to know where I am and what I'm up to.

It's not that I don't believe in the conspiracy theories. I like them. You want to be involved. Chip me. Please chip me. Hey, someone want to chip me tonight? But basically what you wrote for the book is your... Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, the book, the book.

The story behind the development of your character, which we're seeing right now. The Jason Manzook's character, the abrasive, loud, obnoxious. Which a lot of the jokes about 9-11 are things you wouldn't actually... Jeffrey Character Wheaties would never make those jokes and finds them reprehensible. Right.

And tonight we'll make sizable donations to offset what he's said. When do you slip out of the character? When you go home, do you drop it? Like, when you shut the door behind, you do this? Here's the thing I used to, but now I can't. It's really hard. I have to stay Jason Manzukas all the time. Otherwise, nights like tonight suffer.

I appreciate it. I mean, no one appreciates it more than me. Oh, my God, thank you. It really is special what you've done. And it's a testament to your hard work. And I'm glad that finally you're getting the word out because otherwise no one would know that you've been involved in the deepest of cover.

Oh, yeah. Well, I mean, I lived here in New York for 13 years doing comedy, this is where I really built this character. Yeah, I mean, you were doing horrible comedy. Terrible. Just terrible. Describe some of, like, your improv. Were you doing improv before?

I did an improv show for over a year at UCB at midnight, Saturday's at midnight, there was an improvised Saturday morning cartoon in which I played Ricky Martin. Real show called Cartoon chaos. We did it for a year. Saturdays at midnight, never once successfully. The show was terrible. Top to bottom. T-to-Bee, never succeeded. So you were playing the gay, Hispanic

Ricky Martin. Correct. And this was during the Jeffrey Character Wheaties days? Nope. Jason Manzukas. Trying to crack that code unsuccessfully. What was some of the stuff you would do as Jeffrey character Wheaties, though, before you develop the character. Oh, well, that was all just, you know, mostly just theater. Spacework. Yeah, Spacework, Meisner. You know, it was like a lot of just deep, immersive theater, lots of performance art.

Do you still remember any of the movie? I'm not going to do anything of that. Okay, all right. I see where you're going. I see you trying to find a footing. Hey, I'm a guy who got pimped last night into doing his Disneyland audition dance. Wait, what? I did a show here

last night. Oh, here? What was it? We don't need to go into it. It's a great show. We're not promoting other podcasts. We're not promoting other podcasts. We're not promoting other podcasts?

We're here to promote the book. Oh, yeah. Well, it's really special. When do we do the Q&A with the audience? Do you want to do a Q&A? Is that what you said? At the end of the show, I think we should absolutely do a Q&A. Do a talkback?

Talk, yeah, let's, don't all book tours feature a talkback with the author? I think at the end of the show, it makes absolute sense that any idiot here be allowed to ask anybody on stage a question. I get. I mean, technically, I'm not the author. You wrote more pages than I did, I think. If I'm not mistaken, I believe you wrote no pages.

Come on, I wrote a few. Did you? Yes. Okay. Approximately three. I'm pretty... Are you sure Koolov didn't write those pages? I may have written some pages that someone else purported. reportedly wrote, but, well, it's great that you're here.

Are you bruised? It burns. It burns. Why does it burn? It's the Hellfire touch. No. Whatever no sphere burns at the touch. It's great to have you. Jason Manzukas, everyone, aka Jeffrey Character Weedy's. How do you want to do this? I don't know. Yeah, I mean. Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh. We don't want to scare away the next person. We have a big show, so we need to get to our next guest. Let's do it. Not seven people, but six. Or eight.

We could bring another chair out. I look back there. There's a bunch. There's a bunch? I came so close to coming on stage with a chair. So close. I was like, too heavy. All right, well. I'm having fun. Okay. It's so good to have you.

I'm so glad we took a trip together. We're so happy we're here in New York together. We love each other. All right, let's get to our next guest. This is a gentleman with a wonderful CV, as it were. It's great that he's in New York City and could join us. He started off on NBC's The Office, and then he now has a show on Apple TV called Spasm. Please welcome Adam Scott.

Adam Scott, everyone. Thank you, Adam. Thank you, Adam. You miss some over there. You miss some over there. I just want to eat them all up. I just want to eat them all up. I just want to take each one. Mnam, num, num, num, num, num.

If you could eat people, would you? Oh, I would eat all of these people. Oh. Numb, num, num, num, num, num, numb, num, numb. You know? Just, oh, yeah, this is a chompable crowd. Oh, just eat them all up. M'n-nom.

Guys look delicious. Aren't they? Adam's so good. to have you on the show. Thank you. Wonderful. I mean, you've done so much great work. Thank you so much.

Congratulations to you in the entire spasm cast. Thank you very much. All of us over at Spasm are really excited that I was able to make it here tonight. You came straight from the Spasm set, did you not? It came right over from Spasm. This is, I mean, are these your Spasm clothes? These are my Spasm clothes. These are the clothes that I perform spasms in.

Tell us about your... The signature spasms that we all go through. Tell us about your character Del Roy. Del Roy. Delroy is... Some people call him naive. I call him just a little off. Okay.

But it is spasm. So... Wonderful. How are you? I'm good. Nice to have you here. You, of course, contributed to the book. I'm looking over your shoulder at the screen.

Yeah. Not at anyone creeping up behind you. You look behind. It looked like you were alerted to somebody creeping. Someone with a knife. You're very jumpy tonight. What do you mean? There are people who, because of spasm, are out to get him.

That's true. Yeah, a lot of spaz heads. Spas heads. Yeah. Having their spas attacks. Not sure we can say that anymore? I don't think we are supposed to say that. I'm a pretty percent sure we cannot say that.

But that's what they call themselves. So what are we supposed to do about it? The spazids? You know, I heard something, when I was backstage, I heard something out here that really got me excited. I don't know which one of you said it, but jet fuel cannot melt steel. Adam, I'm thrilled that you are as interested as me

in talking about 9-11 for the whole show tonight. Is everybody up for this? really up for this? You brought a slideshow here. I sure did. No, but speaking of a slideshow... It's not working. Isn't this how you doing? We're going to watch Lose change.

I think you're just miming it is the problem. Yeah, that's what... I don't have anything in my hand. That's the issue. But speaking of the slideshow, I did... You did contribute to the book. Could we see Adam's contribution to the book, if that's okay? You gave us a blurb on the back. Yeah, this I wrote this Yeah

Do you want to read it? Yeah, I do That's what I want to do Uh This Oh, you want to do it out loud Well, can we Oh, can

No, I was just going to read it Can we talk about it first? Yeah, sure, of course Can we want to talk about What about this? Do you want to talk about How long it took to write? Yeah, I mean, you named the topic

Yeah, I'd love to talk about how long it took to write. I will say, as a fellow contributor, mine, I spent months on mine. Yeah. That's mainly because you wrote it right before the deadline. That is correct.

I was supposed to write it months earlier, and I did not. Well, I wrote mine. I think you had asked me a couple of times to send me something. The typical Adam Scott interaction, which is to text you incessantly and then get a one-word response

weeks later. Yeah, you're welcome. That's usually the response. So I believe this, if we're going to talk about the amount of time from when you first asked me to have a blurb to when I sent it to you, this took months. Yes, and how long did the actual writing of the blurb take you? Probably about as long as it'll take me to read it right now.

Okay. Okay, so what I'm talking about in the blurb is the Comedy Bang Bang Book that we're all here to celebrate an honor. By burning it. A big pyre right in the middle of the room. We're gonna fly a plane into it. Now, hang on, guys.

I know you're thinking, this is a lot of 9-11. I was with you earlier, this is now too much. But we're only a third of the way through. Oh, yeah. Seriously, though, if there is any steel in this building. Okay, so that's what I'm talking about the book, the book that we're all here to celebrate an honor. Okay, so just so we're clear, that's what this is about, okay?

Got it, good. You set the table. Okay. So, here we go. So, when I start reading it, that's what I'm going to be referring to. When I say CBB book, Comedy Bang, Bang Book. Oh, okay. I didn't even get that when you gave it to me.

Okay. I'm glad I'm going through this. those of you who have it here, which is I think everybody, you are holding the very book. Yeah. That is what's Adam. Thank you, Jason. Thank you. Does anyone have one? Everyone has the book here, yeah.

Do you mind if you? This is the book. Okay. That's actually super helpful. Not for the podcast listeners, but for people in the room who might not know the book we're talking about? Yeah. For the podcast listeners, do you want to describe the book?

Yeah, it's like eight feet wide. Okay. Should we explain what a book is? Yes. Is this at all? What about paper? Are people going to understand what paper is?

Trees? Should we start with trees? Yes. I'm lost already. Anyway, this is it. Comedy, bang, bang, the book, this is it. Blurb that I wrote is on the back here, among others. We've blown it up much larger on the screen.

Thank you. You know, Adam, I was thinking everyone has the book. Maybe we could all read it at the same time. Turn it around. It's on the back, and we can all read it together out loud. Make sure it's not upside down. Yeah, because then it'll sound different. Yeah. Scott, just briefly while people are taking out their books and getting ready,

did you ever think to publish the book at this scale? I know. It's really tempting now that I see it. Honestly, also because so much easier to read. Oh, yeah. I mean, that would be a trim size of... the proximate leaf. We shouldn't talk about trim.

That's a separate podcast. Are we talking trim tonight? That's our show, Drip and Milk, and this is not an episode of that. Drip and Milk, season two, talking trim. Okay, so if everyone's ready, we're going to read it together. Everyone has their book out. Here we go. And we do not read the quotation marks out loud, just FYI.

Before you start. Nor the commas. We don't say comma out loud. No punctuation. Um, other than that, I think we're... Sure, sure, sure, of course. If you don't know a word, just sound it out. Sound it out.

Or you can ask one of us. That's what we're here for. Should we take it? I'd also like to just give, if we might, a single piece of direction. Okay. In that we pronounce the text in blue, in all caps, the way that it's written.

Right. That's true. You don't have to scream. You should, though. When you say the blue text. Okay, are we ready to kick this off? All right, let's go. Okay, here we go.

Three, two, one. Quotation mark. Whoa. No, no, no, no. Let me stop you. Let me stop. Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry. I almost did it too, so that's good.

I'm glad. Force of habit. Can I ask you, when you're on the set of spasm, yeah. Each of your lines, do you start by saying Delroy? I do first, at first, and then we cut that out usually. Put in the blooper reel, and then we're able to keep going. Oh, you know what?

I actually, I'm glad we paused for a second, just because I'm looking at the words, and I'm not sure, there's one I'm not sure how to pronounce. Oh, okay. I'm just going through all the words, it's right there. Words? Okay, got it, thank you. You said it right actually before you said you didn't know how to pronounce it.

Interesting. Yeah. Yeah. I'm glad we're doing this, Jason. I'm thrilled. This is helping me a lot. I've just noticed how I'm sitting in this chair. I have one of my legs over the armrest.

Okay, Adam, thank you. Because here, I have a huge grievance and grudge that all comedy podcasts think they need to put you on stools. Yeah. Hi, stool, so you're like... Yeah. I always feel like I'm a little kid, like, hi, I'm doing a show.

Hi. Why don't you sit cross-legged then down on the floor? Chris Cross Applesauce? Yeah, sure. Go ahead. I would love to. I would love to also just sit on a regular goddamn chair. So my feet are on the ground. So if an attack happens, I can get out of here quick. Meanwhile, I'm like... Let me see the difference. Adam, do you mind playing an attacker really quick? Absolutely, no problem. Let me see the difference of how quick you can do it this way from... Okay, so let's like say we're just doing the... Yeah, we're shooting the show. Yeah, we're shooting the show.

Do you want me to come from behind or from where I am right now? I think how do attackers... You know what? I think from the audience, because that's where these fuckers are coming from. Let's be honest. They've got a very important note I need to read. All right. Anyway, what a great time.

Oh my God, I'm having such a good time with you. Jason, I love performing on stage with you. Sorry, guys. Yeah. When you want me to start the attack. Just give me a signal. Just give me a signal. Okay.

What kind of signal? A hand signal. Got it. Like a... Like hang loose? Like a shaka? Hang loose? Okay.

So we'll just do like it's the regular show. Right. So writing the book, I feel like for you must have been an incredibly... It's incredible... I mean, those three pages were just so difficult for me to write. Did you feel at any time like you knew what you wanted to say, but we're having a hard time getting it? it out? Yeah, but I just relied upon Thesaurus.com most of the time. Thesaurus.com. So you're here

promoting Thesaurus.com? I would just put it on random. Put it on random. Whatever word popped up, I would throw into my... Oh, wow. That's interesting. I never would have thought of it. I'm realizing we forgot to give you the signal. We got so into it. We got so wrapped up in our own thing. And Thessoris.com. Yeah. That one's not up yet. It's okay. Sorry, we'll remember to give you the signal right now.

Adam, turn that the other way. No, no. Hey, whoa, no way. I'm stuck. I'm stuck above. I'm too high. Yeah, these chairs are bullshit. Yeah, right?

Yeah. Yeah, right? That bit's gonna play great in audio only. I mean, because it played so well in the room. So let's read this. Yeah. Okay, here we go. Do you, by the way, can you read it in under five seconds?

How quickly do you think you could read? I can, I'll promise you this. I can read it in under seven minutes. Okay, yeah, sure. I'll take that. Okay, here we go. Everyone have their book set? Everyone's ready?

Okay, because we're all going to read it together. Here we go. One. Should we count one, two, three, or three, two, one? You guys care? Let's count. up to 10. Okay, here we go. One, two, three, four, five, six.

I feel like we should go down though. I think you're right. I do feel like it should be in reverse. Down from 20. Down from 20. Sure. Okay. Also because that will help everybody get in the rhythm. Yeah, that's right.

And you can make sure you have your books out. Here we go. I'm not, I'll be honest, a lot of you don't have your books out. I'm a little worried. Which makes me. think you're not going to read from the book. So how are you going to participate? Yeah. You know what? We should give them more time to give their books out. Down from 40. Ready? Yeah. 40, 39, 38, 37, 36, 35, 34, 33, 33, 32, 31, 30, 20, 29, 28, 27,

26, 25, 24, 23, 22, oh 20, 20. You said 21. You jumped. You jumped. Oh, God damn, I'm sorry, we've got to start over. Let's just go straight in. Go, well, go again, straight away, let's go again. Okay, and 40, 39, 38, 37, 36, 35, 34, 34, 33, 32, 32, 31, 31, 30, 30, 29, 29,

28, 27, 26, 25, 24, 23, 22, 22, 21, 20, 20, 19, 18, 17, 16, 15, 15, 14, 14, 13, 12, 11, 11, 10, 10, 10, 7, 5, 14, 14, 13, 12, 11, 10, 10, 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, Three, two, one. Everything you want in a CBB book. Chapters, pages, words, letters, pictures, syllables, winks, gravy, live bees, and, of course, Scott's signature dance. I'm going to read it five more times than go back to sleep. Adam Scott! I'm in a full body sweat

That really was exhausting That was electric I think I have COVID now I felt like... Can you get COVID from reading out loud? Yes! Yes! Droplets! All these fucking monsters just show... We asked them to shout droplets right at us. But still, I just want to eat them all.

Well, Adam, thank you so much. for participating with that. And it means a lot that you're here tonight. Thank you. And, yeah. Yeah. I love it. You know what?

I love it. I love it all. I love seeing it up on the screen. I love that. I'm just going to be honest. When I wrote this, I never dreamed that I would see it up on the big screen. Did you?

Did you? Because now you're a published author. Absolutely. Now you're a published author. Do you feel as though that adds just another element to your career that's exciting to you? Are you going to develop this into anything? Thank you. Thank you for saying that.

You're welcome. I mean, it's more than just a feather in the cap, okay? Which it is. But yeah, I think... If you could have a feather in your cap, from what bird? Enu. In you? Pigeon.

But you, I mean, Adam, you have a cap full of feathers. So many feathers. Your head is just covered with feathers like an Indian headdress. You might as well hollow out a bird and wear it on your head for how many feathers you've got. That makes me really hungry. I mean, you're a published author. Yes. You're a bad actor.

Yes. Other things. But those are two feathers. Yes. Yes. Most caps can't even carry that. Adam, I'd love to talk to you about the movie TORC. Absolutely.

That's your other show. Oh, sorry. Sorry. We're not doing how to this get made. We're not doing how to this get made tonight. But it is really special, and I thank you so much. And usually when you thank someone, they thank you back. No, thank you.

I appreciate it. Oh, okay. I appreciate it. I appreciate it being asked. I appreciate it being asked. Yeah. And it is great to see it on the big screen. It's like.

It's like seeing it on the big screen. This technically is better than any movie you were ever in. It's more fulfilling. I got paid more. Was there ever a point in which myself or Adam were going to be featured in the cover? As such huge contributors, but I can't help but notice neither of us is featured in this cover. Because there's Rob Schneider is there in the cowboy hat. So he made it on there.

He made it on. Randy Quaid is there in the back. It's a gorgeous cover, so... It really is, but no, I never... What's worse that I didn't ask you or didn't even think to ask you? They're both really bad. Yeah, I'm seeing that now.

But thanks for being part of the back of the book. No problem, thank you. The very last thing anyone will read. Adam Scott, All right, everyone. All right, well, a wonderful panel already. And I'm afraid... And we have seven more people to go.

I'm afraid I'm going to bring the mood down a little bit. Oh, boy. No. Because I genuinely am friends with both of you. Yeah. Are we friends with you? I don't, only you can answer that question. And by the end of the show, those questions will be answered during the Q&A.

What if Mori Popovich came out with an envelope and told me whether you were my friend or not? The big friend reveal at the end of the show. I dance around. Scott, would you be surprised to know that Adam is not your friend? Ooh, boo, you dance around. But the next person I'm bringing on, I genuinely hate. He is a children's entertainer of note. Please welcome Big Chunky Bubbles.

Hi. BCB, how are you? That's right. It's me. Big Chucky Bubble. Do you remember what I do for a living? You are, for those of you who don't know BCB, he is a children's entertainer. That's right.

You blow bubbles. for children. I don't blow bubbles. Your breath is not involved. No, I mean, I'm breathing while I do it. Thank God. Yeah. I'm sure you're real relieved.

Have you ever forgotten to breathe in the middle of a performance? What are you talking about? Forgotten to breathe. Like I'm up there doing my thing and then, oops. I forgot to inhale. Hey, that's the opposite

of Bill Clinton, right? Yeah. Did you just try and high-five me with the back of your hand? Yeah. Well, I felt bad about, like, giving you the part I touched stuff with. Oh, okay.

You know what? I appreciate that. You didn't feel bad doing it to me. You're disgusting. This is my left. You should feel bad about making the Bill Clinton joke in 2023. We're coming up on the 30th anniversary, I believe, of him.

Oh, good. I'll send you a cake. What do you... What do you play? You celebrate it every year, don't you? Of course. 29 years. 28. 27.

26. I don't blow bubbles. I'm a bubble artist, and I create bubbles out of soups, stews, and chowders. See, the people know. The crowd furiously checking the wiki. Correct me if I'm wrong. Oh, I will. I'm ready.

By the way, we're all right here on you. There are but two chowders, are there not? No. Go on. What do you think the two chowders are? And corn. But there's multiple clam chowders. There's multi, see, even he knows.

But those are all variants of clam chowder. All chowders are variants of chowder. But those are variants of soup. Oh, this hamburger has lettuce on it. Hmm, must be a different strain. I don't know. I'd have to explain food. to you.

What? They made a blue car? Now I've seen everything. Adam, what... I wonder if you could make... If you could make clam chowder with the blue milk from Star Wars. Yes.

And then you would have blue chowder. Right. Well, why don't we have Hans Solo whip us up a badge since we're getting things from a... a fictional universe. Is it contagious what you have? Now everybody's dumb? Oh, you're telling me.

Oh, wow. You're gonna, I'm trying to support you. Look, look, look, look, look, like. I'm trying to support you. You don't think it would be great to go to a kid's birthday party with... Jason. Star Wars Blue Chod?

This motherfucker, Scott. Jason. This motherfucker is getting on me. How did you get up from your chair so fast? I don't know. Let me tell you something. There's no amount of... fictional milk that makes a children's birthday party

something you want to go to. They're the worst audience is in the world. Come on, tell you... These people out here who have kids who don't want to go to a birthday party, you're telling me that if you said there's going to be Star Wars blue milk bubbles there, those kids are going

in a second. Made out of a seafood chowder? Yes. On a hot summer's day? Who doesn't want pink eye and diarrhea from bubbles? That was one of your taglines, right? Why do I come on this show?

I don't know. You're very disrespectful. I'm trying to be friends with you. You are? Oh, I thought you were, this was, is this not marketing for you? Are you not trying to get jobs? I am, of course I am. This is you, this is you being friendly.

I had no idea. I'm sorry. By the way, I apologize, he's more of a trekkie. Thank you for apologizing. That's not true either. You were telling me backstage. My favorite sci-fi show of all time, of course, is Blake 7. I don't even know what that is.

I barely do, but listen. That's why it's your favorite. We shouldn't press you on specifics. I don't want to, I didn't come here to talk about that. So I won't. Adam, what is your favorite soup if you had to pick? Well, let's just say, like, an intruder comes to your house. Yes.

What would I be making when he walked in? Sure, but also if he were to, he had, you know, some sort of weapon pointed to the back of your head. He's going to kill you execution style. Some sort of weapon. Yeah. But it pointed at the back of your head. Sure. Could be a baseball bat.

A cat of nine tails. Cat of nine tails pointed directly at the back of your head. He's going to whip the back of the nape of your neck. Right. And I have to say... And you have to say what your favorite soup is. What do you say in that moment? This is the weirdest home intruder I've ever encountered. He's a weird guy, I admit.

This was the original plot of funny games. The original. Right, before they changed it. Before they changed it. Think of a lot, Michael Hanukkah. The studio Big Wigs got more. Oh, yeah. I mean, I would have to go with some sort of challenge.

Really? Absolutely. Okay. And since there's only two, it's a flip of a coin at this point. I would have to go with a clam. But which kind? Manhattan or New England?

Well, Manhattan, of course. Whoa. They've discovered a third chowder. Whoa. What is it? Do we have to go over this whole thing again? I want to do the whole thing. again. Forty

39. No, no. 38. Boom. Sorry, we're pasting something from Brett's phone. Turn that mic. If I don't like something, I'm just going to yell. Did you think someone who was coming up from behind you? I did for a second, yeah. What the fuck is going on?

Get a little feedback, I just want to make sure. I didn't think the show could get less professional, but you found a new speed. Do you think I'm unpleasant? Yes! Big Chunky Bubbles is like the Stattler and Waldorf of the show. Just up in the, up in, just sniping. They should have been the whole show. You would watch that.

They're my favorite part. I'd take that as a spin-off. Because I hate frogs. Frog? Are there any... Are there any... Are there any soups with frogs? There are.

Frog legs? You can make a frog leg soup? Can you? You can make a soup out of anything, Greg. But does it make good... But does it make for good bubbles? Oh, boy. That was an homage to your coworker.

Can you make soup out of me? You can tell them about that in the morning, if you like... Sure. Different soups make different bubbles. Of course. It stands to really. What is the best soup for making a giant bubble? A really big bubble?

The biggest bubble you've ever seen. The biggest bubble? I mean, beyond for artistic purposes, just for record setting. Now, are you in the record books in any way, shape, or form for the size? We have a contact at the Guinness Book of World Records. It's not Fred Guinness, isn't it? It's Fred Guinness. That guy can go to it.

to hell. You've interacted with Fred Guinness? I've contacted him several times. Really? And he doesn't return your call? He always picks up for us. He and talks, it seems like he has a personal relationship with everybody else we know. These are all callbacks to his show.

Nobody's heard yet. I called him because I am, by far, the most successful bubble artist working in suits, twos, and chowders. Wow. No one else is even close. So why did he turn you down? for this. Why, I mean, why aren't you in the book?

He said it was too weird. I didn't think he was allowed to say that. What does he tell you? He's one of the weirdest guys in the world. He, like, devoted his life to writing a book about weird things. They're not all weird. To be fair. I mean, it's a guy who can fit, like, a million cigarettes in his mouth. Like, oh, now you're defending the man who you just moments ago were deriding for ignoring you.

Well, because my thing isn't weird. There's records for the fastest person who ever ran. Aren't those just like Olympic records, though? Are those? Yeah, but they put them in the book. Why wouldn't they? That seems like cheating. These should be Guinness book-specific records.

How would that work? Do you think Guinness contracts people to do certain things? He should be out there on the ground reporting his own records. He can't just, like, contact the Olympics and go, hey, who's the fastest person who ever... Does he contact him? Just watch them on TV like everybody else. That's the thing!

This motherfucker. If you can't remember, now it's in a book. Why have you got me defending this man that I just cried? I'm on your side. Can I... If you don't mind me, can I ask a question? I do mind you, but go ahead. I appreciate that.

How come you don't seem to work, or have you tried and not been successful with BISCs at all? Great question. The crowd, very interested in this. So much so that I don't want them on my side. It's all right.

It's an actually interesting question. Congrats. Man, the more you neg me, the more I want to fuck you. Is that what you're up to? No, I'm still grieving my wife. That's right. wife who, by the way, for those of you who

don't know, she passed away in a... She passed away, how was it exactly? It was in a tragic bubble accident. Oh, no. Oh, no. I made a soup that was too hot. Was it your fault?

It was my fault. She was so proud of me. She was my biggest supporter and cheerleader. And she... No. You can't take it that seriously. Shame on you. You're adults.

Don't feel bad. I was working on, as a matter of fact, a bisque bubble. Oh, no. The mist bubble is the holy grail of bubble tree. Of course. I'm assuming a lobster bisque because it's so rich and expensive.

Well, of course. Nothing but the best. Nothing but the bisque? For my bisque bubble. So I was almost there, and I called my wife in, much of the way that Alexander Graham Bell called for Assistant Watson. What? You're almost as inaudible as Dr. Sweetchat at this point.

Holy shit. You never heard of the telephone? Alexander Graham Bell would enter the telephone. He would say, ahoy. The first thing he did was yell for his assistant to come. in and see that he'd done it. Watson, I need you. That's right.

Yes. So, I said, honey, I'm doing it. I'm doing it. The bisque bubble, it's real. She rushed into the bubble laboratory. La-bubble-a-tory? No. No. Okay. Scott. Come on.

Wow. I'm sorry. This is where your wife passed away. Yeah, good chiming on the story about my dead wife. Just so sorry. Grinding the show to a halt. Who's over there? for word right there

this guy trying to do sciops on me and she started rushing towards me to embrace me and I said honey no it's too hot she got two clothes and the bubble burst it burned her skin right down to the skull

wow like an Indiana Jones it was like opening the arc of the covenant oh my god she just like it happened so far it happened so fast. My wife standing there, from the neck down, a person, and from the neck

up a skeleton head. Oh, no. Did she ever go to the doctor to get a checkup from the neck up? What do you mean? Scott? What do you mean? I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Sorry, this is...

It's all right. I know you're still sensitive about this, right? Yeah. Well, I mean, I guess that makes sense why you haven't attempted the best. bubble again. And I'm, and I didn't know that, so I, sincerely, I didn't mean to. Or have you attempted Bisk bubbles since then? I've thought about it every day since.

Hmm. And every... Yeah. Get a life. For real. Oh. That's bad. They're so enraptured by the star.

I mean, he's a wonderful. Oh, they're inside. Whatever you can. say about him he's a wonderful storyteller every time i collect the ingredients for the best and start putting it together inevitably i look down in the tree and i see my wife's grinning skull looking back at that you got to take that skull out of your train yeah i appreciate it as a tribute but you really should not keep it in there it's not our actual skull oh okay i have a weird guilt vision, don't you get it?

But do you, well, I feel like if this, this is, if your life, oh boy, if your life was a movie. Are you all right? If your life was a movie, if we made a movie of your life, which would be a great idea. I would actually like to do this. Act three would be you having to

finish the bisque successfully and in doing so, finding true love again. Yes. First scene is your wife's face melting off. Yeah. that just started with a bang and then you keep flashing back to it

and you're turning your back on the bisque yes and on her well because she's dead it's kind of hard to get psyched about this I hear you I hear you but we could I bet if we beat this out for another 10 20 minutes we start putting

note cards up we can get this done we can break the story yeah you could play yourself Or you could play your wife Or you could play everybody Eddie Murphy style clumps Yeah Or you could play everybody

Eddie Murphy style clumps Yes Yeah don't they call it clumping it They say you can clump it You could clump it up Clump clump clump clump clump it up Did you see that movie the whale One clump? Forget it

That's my point I am waiting for the other clubs to show up. Instead of just a movie about a fat man having a feelings? Weird. I thought Eddie Murphy did great in it. No, he's terrific as always. Big Chonky Bubble. Good to see him in Whiteface again.

And that was just them being like the Clumps technology is being ignored. Big Chunky Bubbles, I did want to bring up your contribution to the book. What book? Oh, we're here doing a Comedy Bang Bang Book. Everyone has one. Bang Bang Book. There's a book. Yeah, it's a book.

We actually have something that is related to you in the book. Could we bring that up on the screen? What? How dare you? This is a review from the newspaper of your act? This happened in Montreal.

Gila Schatz, that hack? It's, pardon me, I thought that we had your permission to put it in. No. Why would I ever grant permission when this to make my... It is public domain, though. It's in the newspaper, so I think maybe we contacted them. Oh, you're mad at Fred Guinness, though?

I think that... Why are you hanging out over my head? I don't think he's mad at Fred Guinness. You're mad at Fred Guinness. I'm mad at Fred Guinness. You got me going crazy. We love Fred Guinness. You are attacking his policies, though,

putting Olympic Records out of the Guinness by my record. A new wrinkle to big chunky bubbles. The monitors here are as bad as Largo. Where are they? They are just the speakers pointing out. Right. That's not a monitor, son. Now, because we've established it from Adam's piece as well,

we're going to count down from 40 and we're going to read the whole thing. The whole thing. It's long. It's also cool. quite brutal against you. It is. Very unfair. Sorry, I just, you know, you wouldn't write me back

when I asked you to write a piece for the book, so I, you know. Did I not have the right email address, or? No, you did. Those filters work like a charm. Instagram filters? Oh, email filters. Try it sometime.

I will. Are you down, a big chunk of... Are you down to inbox zero? Yes. That's admirable. That's impressive stuff. I pulled it off last year. Very exciting.

I even replied to all the spams. Oh, wow. I just wrote back, I'd rather not, thanks. I finally realized I should just cut and paste. Please take me off your list. I'm perfectly happy. with the size of my penis.

Are you happy with the size of your penis? I love it. You love it. Yeah. Well. That's the quote. I'm perfectly happy. See, if you just would have written that,

I could have put that in the book instead of... I was very suspicious when you asked me to write something for your book. Yeah. Sorry. It seemed like a trick and a tramp. Not a treat or a treasure. no we had a lot of people contribute things to the book

and you know brock love it do you know brock the treasure hunter yeah sorry wet treasure right yeah one time he found a diamond ring in one of my soups he said finders keepers where did it come from

an old lady threw it in there she told somebody a story of her life and then threw the diamond ring in a bowl of soup this guy has old ladies throwing jewelry out of night and day. I would love it so much more if James Cameron was more interested

in the depths of soups and stews than our own oceans. Yeah. I read an interesting article the other day about if that were real. What were? The diamond? The throwing the Cordillamere into the ocean. Right.

That the insurance, if they found it, the insurance company would have kept it. What are you, what are you reading? What are you reading? Insurance? You has a gall to call this an interesting article?

I read an interesting article. You ought to be tried at the Hague. This is a war crime. Like 9-11. Yeah, no shit, guys. False flag. Okay. Honestly, where did you read that?

What honest to God are you reading? It was germane to the interest of Brock Lovett and myself. Was it Your Majesty to it as well? That's the show. Black it out. It's not getting better. So the insurance... What happened at the insurance...

Basically, what they were positing is that if Brock Lovett were to retrieve the Cordillamere, Right. Billy Zane's character would have... Shut the fuck up. You read an article about Brock Love it? Yes. Got it.

That Billy... Whatever Billy Zane's character's name was... Cow! Okay. You a big Titanic fan? Love it. I dare you not to cry. He would have insured the diamond

because it was worth so much. So his airs, he drowned on the boat, didn't he? Or did he get off? No, he was a coward. He was a coward. He took someone's baby to escape. He ate someone's baby to escape? Yeah, he ate someone's baby to escape.

Took an eight, don't even sound alike. That's in the deleted scenes. So he got off, he would have filed an insurance claim for the... What are you doing? For the court of LaMere. Who cares? So when it was... found it would be the property of the insurance company,

not of Brock Loven's. But it wasn't Brock Loven's property anyway. It was Rose's property. Because Cal gave it to her as a gift. Did she declare it for tax purposes? That's the other thing. Well, that's paragraph 8. Anyway, if he were here, I would tell him all about it.

But do we know that he wanted it for his own personal gain, or did he just want to find? from the Titanic. Was he like one of those it belongs in a museum types? No, I think you just... Maybe. I don't remember.

What types are those? You know, like, not to bring up a movie that will trigger something for you, but Indiana Jones with the melting faces. I was trying not to say it. God, Big Charlie Bubbles, you're crying.

I'm weeping. I'm so sorry, Petey, oh, by the way, that's, your name is... Do you feel like if you... Sorry. Sorry, your name... No, it's right. For those of you who don't know, I called you Petey because... That's right.

My given name is not big junkie bubbles. Big surprise. My stage name. My real name is Pity Amin. I don't think I knew that. I gotta read the wiki. Sorry, so what were you going to ask? I was going to ask, do you feel, because you just, I mean, we're here with you tonight,

you seem truly still so heartbroken at the loss of your life. Do you feel like if you could accomplish the Bisk bubble, it would give you closure? Yeah. Is there moving on from this? That's a pretty big question. Scott asked me to come out here to ask the big questions. Yeah. He said, I'm going to ask the little dumb questions.

I'm a coward. If you could focus on. on big, interesting questions. I know that my wife would want me to be able to do the best bubble. Oh. Oh, Pedy. What was her name?

I don't remember. Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't. That can happen when a woman's face melts away. Exactly. There are no distinguishing features left. I haven't talked about this in a while. It's so hard.

You start to forget about those people that you've lost, including their names. Yeah. Does anybody remember? No. Okay. Let him host the show. Yeah.

He thought you were talking about Alexander Graham Bell earlier. He got that confused. I don't need the explanation. Okay. I better name was something like that. I want that for you. I want for you to find closure in this world so that you can move forward

and have happiness again. Find true love. Thanks, weird stranger. Also, your children need a stepmother, you know, your wonderful children. Robbie, Bobby, and Tag. Names you remember immediately.

They're still alive and around me all the time. Their faces still are right where they're supposed to be. You seem to not like them. You seem to not like them? They're not my favorite. Okay, maybe start

working on the BISC bubble again. Oh, Jason. You're more upset at that than the 9-11 stuff? This crowd is unbelievably weird. Go ahead. Were you like this before

your wife passed away, or? Unhappy to be on this Joe? No, it hadn't happened yet. Because we've only known you in the shadow of such an incredible tragedy, and you're such an incredibly awful person to be around. I'm just wondering if you were different before then, if she added some... You know what, bro? I'll grant you that. I'm not the most pleasant fellow.

And yes, there was a time. When I smiled and laughed. I was quick with a joker to light up your smoke. Would you make tonics in gin? Yeah. I remember one time going to this bar. And it was Saturday. It was a pretty good crowd.

For a Saturday. For five o'clock, were you there midday? Or wait. You think midday is five o'clock? What are you, a vampire? You know, when I have a drink, It's midday somewhere. To answer your question, yes, I was a more fun guy before.

Well, I hope you get back there. Maybe we could set you up with one of the guests on the show sometime. I don't know. I mean... To discover that joy again. Do you feel like the making of the bubbles now remind... It's got to remind you of that tragedy. You know, to have a family like Adam does and like I do.

And well... Someone, he's married to show business. I do have a family, by the way, have those three miserable kids. But I will confess, I've been perusing the apps. Really? Are you on... Are you on Bubble?

I'm on Raya. Oh, yeah? I almost went on Bumble because it was so close. and, you know, swiping this way and that. Sometimes all I can see is just a skull. Would that be attractive to you if there was just... My question is, when you see a beautiful woman's face, are you picturing the skull beneath it?

Yeah. Wonderful cheekbones. I think that's what I just said. Oh, sorry. I didn't mean literally there's skulls on riah. Yeah. I didn't know. Maybe.

Would that turn you on if you saw someone who... Ew. ...was like the red skull, but... The red skull? The Marvel villain? Yeah. I mean, I know what a skull looks like. You don't have to bring comic books into it for me to understand.

Hmm. But no, it wouldn't. I liked my wife when she had a face. But I love her always. Whatever her name was. Big Chunky Bubbles, everyone. Can you stick around, BCB? Yeah.

Well, we have a wonderful guest right now. Adam, you and I have several podcasts about music. Yeah, yeah. We've covered you two. YouTube, yes, yes. I am. Sa? Sausalis.

Sosses. Sources. The band. Are we doing a short-form improv show? Yes. We're hoping to go off Broadway with it for next season. That's right. This is a little preview.

We're going to start at the Beacon. Cherry Lane, get to the Cherry Lane. But there's one band that we haven't covered. That's right. And that is, of course, the Fab Four. And please welcome to the stage John Lennon. Wow. They're sitting up.

They're standing up, I should say. Amazing. Jason is giving you a standing and walking out of the room ovation. That makes sense. John, so good to have you here. Oh my God, it's so great to be here in Brooklyn. How about that?

You know, I came all the way from Manhattan. It's great to... Oh, thank you. Okay. Usually you... Thank you so much. I haven't been on stage in a long time. This is big chunky bubbles.

He's an entertainer as well. I saw him backstage. It's a pleasure to see you. Moving around and doing bubble stuff. I was moving around and doing bubble stuff. You were doing bubble stuff backstage? Yeah. You've never done it on stage.

Why would I? He put me in a bubble. He did the thing and I'm sitting there in a big stew bubble. Did you say it was? It was a big stew bubble. Very exciting back there and now I'm out here. But I was going to say, You know, it's so great to be in Brooklyn with all the...

Look at the hipsters out here. Drinking coffee. You know, hipster, you can always tell a hipster because they're drinking coffee after 6 p.m. I've, you know, I of course don't see any right now, but you've got crazy haircuts out there. Look at these people. Wait, you're one of the people with the original crazy haircut.

The mop top itself. That's right. That's right. Because we were all so thin back then, you know. So we had mop bodies and furs. first and it was uh so they would they would call you in the press they would call you the four mop bodies right the four sticks you know and i'd say wringo i think they're talking to you because he would use drumsticks because he played the drums in the back of the whole land he's behind us

right so i didn't see him i like him the most but i didn't i saw him the least so you thought they were referring to his two sticks but they were seeing double or I know, I thought they were talking about his two sticks and the backups. Hey, he always kept a backup. When you were playing live shows, how often would you turn around and look at Ringo? Very seldomly, only to be, what song are we playing next? Oh, Ringo. Was he the guy who had the order of the songs?

He had it all written down on his one drum. If he'll go back and look at videos of him playing, film, he would. He would, you'd always know, he'd always know. he'd never hit the floor tom because that's where the set list was taped he would always consider it yeah right and then decide not to throw us all off but oh right he doesn't want to hit that one drum we should add a drum to the second floor tom so we can put that on it or maybe put the set list you know on the floor in front of you guys instead of could be could a bit where were you we need i don't think i was on this early

yet but you're stealing your dad's balls John have you started working blue I'm doing stand-up now I'm doing a lot of stand-up you are I would love to see some of crowd work stand-up I'll do it for you go I'm seeing it yeah I'd love to say who would like to see John Lennon do stand-up can we get a spotlight? Can we get a spotlight on here can we get a spotlight I don't think you're on there's no spotlight and my mic's not on yeah did you I'm going to keep talking. Oh, here we are.

Is there a spotlight? No, okay, okay. Okay. They can make the lights very bright. On Broadway. Scott, you'd fit in perfectly in this town. Hmm. Anyway, I thought you said something about Broadway.

Okay, I'll do some of my crowdwork. What do you think you're some... You fuck face. What do you think you're so great? You think you're so special. I'm John fucking Lenin. I can have you thrown into a dumpster. What are you laughing at?

You say, you're all, get him out of here. I don't want any of these people in here. Wouldn't that be something if we just had this conversation by ourselves? Here still. That's good stuff. Yeah. I might steal a couple lines from you.

Oh, that would be an amazing double bill. John Lennon opened by Big Chunky Bulbulbals. We don't know the order yet. That sentence. By the way, Adam, I don't know if you know this, but John Lennon, you're a big music fan. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. This hasn't made it to Rolling Stone or anything like that. But John was dead.

How did you die again? I was shot in the body. Directly in the body. I fled everywhere. No, you were killed. You were murdered? On site, yes, right. I was coming out of my home, which I live in now still, the Dakota.

All right, I don't think I have any neighbors here. Look, they're all hipsters, you know. You were coming out and a man by the name of Mark. Mark Summers. No. Got his hands on a gun. That's a different guy. He was the host of Double Dare.

I think... I get those confused because I've always wanted to be on Double Dare and I always wanted to not die. I remember those were my one... The two things I want. Got him transposed, yeah. Also, his name. famous summers and you died in the winter in December of course right oh man thanks well it happy ending because came back to life came out of the ground so how did that work how did you

I was in there for four years in a casket in the ground and you get very bored in there and I remember I had a book I can't even remember the name of the book now and I read it and it was boring and I said I don't like this anymore got out I'm walking around I'm doing everything I used to do but I don't tell Yoko that I'm alive please don't tell you I'll go live because I'm borrowing one of her forays, and I don't want to give it back. I'm still married, I think.

But that's the only reason you don't want her to know because you're borrowing. Pretty much. And, you know, I'm having a fun time being out without her. Yeah, it's so strange she hasn't run into you yet. It's... We run in very different circles.

In Manhattan. You're still at the Dakota. Still at the Dakota. She actually might have an appointment. apartment in there I see someone who looks exactly like a from behind and in the front too but I'm all you know I'm always wearing the big nose and mustache and big glasses hat trench coat bubble coat over the trench coat shoes too big and an extra watch which I'd only usually around her would only wear one watch

and she looks at my wrist oh two watches okay never met this man don't know him at Although he knows my name. So you address her sometime. Right. Hello, Yolko. How's your day been? How are our children? Do you disguise your voice and all?

I try to. I try. Let's hear it. I do a lot of that, too. Hello, Yolko. How you doing, mate? How are our children. Oh, so you say, you say, how are our children to her?

Are our children? Does one still look like me almost exactly? She said, oh, kind of, but he doesn't wear two watches. Got away with another one, I see. How many, just out of curiosity. How many children do you think you have with Yolka? Well, she. I'm asking as a fan.

No. Well, I got the, I had two watches. Do you need to check the wiki? I don't know. I have two wives and I think between us we had, I want to say three kids. My birthday is October 8th. Take the win, take the win. Out of curiosity, and forgive me if this has been covered before,

before, but John, have you seen the movie yesterday? I've heard about it. This is very interesting. It really... By the way, he means the movie called yesterday. He's not asking if you saw a movie yesterday. Oh, then I don't know what you're talking about. I'm so glad you clarified.

I just got HBO Max. Is anyone a Max Easter? What? What is he talking about? He comes out here half drunk. No, I'm not drunk. You were saying?

There's a movie. I think they're covering it on blank check next week, a podcast where the fans will really let you know if they don't like you. Or if they do. That's nice, too. You know, there are nice people on the Internet, too. We forget about them.

But it's a Danny Boyle film that is a movie about suddenly everyone in the world except for like three people forget who the Beatles are. Right. Right. And I will say this, in spoilers for the movie, you are still alive in the movie. I've heard of this. In the timeline, yeah.

Somebody playing me shows up. You're an older man. Wait, it wasn't you, was it? No, I didn't, I'm not an actor. When I got my glasses, I was. Just in that one wall movie and I got those glasses. That's the other. a fact a lot of people know about me.

Well, you were also in help, you were in... Sure, but I, those were glorified music videos. But what do you think about that supposition that if the Beatles never existed, you would still be... I mean, you are alive, obviously, but... I'd be alive, right? And would I have all the money? No, I think he was pretty broke. Broke? And I would like that. I'd like to be more of a beetle guy who has all the money in fame. You like where you're at right now.

I like where I'm at because I'm alive. I can do anything I want and people don't bother me and I can play music if I want. No, I don't want to. And you've never, I keep beseeching you to come bring your guitar and play some songs. The damn thing. Well, you know where it is.

It's Rigo's got it. He's still telling me he's going to sign up for guitar lessons. So you guys are in touch. Oh, every day. That's why I was watching movies with yesterday. Oh, wow. What do you guys watch? What kind of movies do?

Are Ringo, I mean, that's, wow, isn't that interesting? To think about John Lennon and Ringo Starrs sitting together watching a movie. What are you guys up to? Like, what are you watching? Well, we're mostly dishing of whoever we see on TV. But these days we're watching, we're getting into the Batman series. The Christopher Nolan? Christopher Nolan, Batman.

And then we're going to watch the one with Paul Dano. You're a big Paul Dano fan. Love Paul Dano. I absolutely love everything he's been in. From the girl next door, all the way up to There Will Be Blood. And then the movie I just mentioned, Batman. So you skip over from There Will Be Blood to the Batman movie he was in.

Right. And I saw some of the fable ones. Sure. Some of them. Well, here's what happened. I put it in a DVD player that I got at Best Buy. It was a $20 DVD player. because I only have a few DVDs I want to see

so I don't need to buy an expensive one anyway because mostly it's streaming it seems like this side of the room doesn't understand it's mostly streaming honestly god this side of the room are assholes don't even deal with them I'm not even going to bring up Blu-rays heads of blow up

bought a $20 DVD player put the Fableman's DVD I watch about half of it, it stopped completely stopped the movie stopped Movie stopped, image jerked off to the side, and... It jerked off. It just went, goodbye.

The image jerked off to the side? I knew what I said. I do it. This is about a young boy. By the way, I would love to watch that version of the movie. And, yeah, I couldn't watch any more of it, but when I saw, I didn't really find too engaging. Did you try, like, take it out and rubbing it on your pants and then putting it back in?

That's what I always do. I don't have time to tell you the amount of service. I rubbed it on. We've rubbed it on everything to try to get it clean. You think we didn't try that? Did you try blowing in the DVD player inside? Shit. We were unplugging the plug, blowing all over the plug and putting that back in. Because Ringo said, I read this article about how plugs get dusty now,

and that's a big thing. I said, okay, you're doing the one reading. You're reading around here, I'm not. Wow, a fascinating article. Did you catch that one, Scott? Yeah. I read the headline. When you and Ringo are together, you never think to, it's never inspiring to come up with new music or nothing creative starts happening. I'll sit down at the piano and then we'll invariably get into most of Weird Al's catalog. So you just start playing something and then it just like, oh no, Weird Al.

We know this one. It's Eat It will go into that. Because we're usually trying to replicate. Have you guys ever thought about doing a Weird Al cover band? That would be fun. Who would go to... Well, who would really want to go see John Lennon and Ringo doing weird Al covers? By the way, millions of people.

Literally everybody in the world, that would be incredible. At least once. God. I got a pitch. What if instead of a Weird Al cover band, you become a Weird Al parody band and you parody the songs

that Weird Al's already parody. So now... Or you parody the Weird Al parodies? Like, you mean like continuing it? Yeah, what he said. Exactly what I said. That's what he said. I'm asking for clarification.

I'm glad the sound is finally traveling down to you. What he said, but me. Right. Welcome to Comedy Bang Bang. What he did, but I say it. Oh, but also louder. What he said, but moments ago? Yes.

Okay. I'm glad even though there's no women on the show, he can still fit that behavior in. So y'all sing, take the songs and make them sillier or go back to the originals? No, just equally as silly. No, make them sad. Oh, sad songs. Take a sad song.

Right. And make it sadder. And make it sadder. Yeah. I recognize that lyric from something. It's one of your songs. One of the greats. One of our great songs.

Paul, Paul, what about, or John? The Beatles? It's a Beatles song, sure. John, what about a Pope? Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you.

Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fight. Fight, fight, fight. Fight, fight, fight, fight, fight, fight, fight, fight, fight, fuck, fuck, fuck. Don't do it. What were you saying?

He was saying fight. You were saying. We're the same sometimes. Adam, we were interrupting you. What did you do? No, I wanted to know. I wanted to know, John, what about Paul? Paul, we're talking about Ringo, what about Paul McCartney?

He's still with us. He's still with us. He's great, but he's touring. You know, he's always so busy touring. But does he know you're alive? He knows, yeah. I go in and I help him, you know, run some of the songs, rehearse the songs for tour and get him ready because he's such a nervous guy, you know.

I'm not ready. Are they going to go out there? They're going to throw popcorn at me. I say, you know, Paul, first of all, the stadiums he plays in a humongous. To get a piece of popcorn anywhere is difficult. anyway. So he's nervous and I get him calm down. We run the songs. Ringo and I and him and George Harrison's son come by. We

do all the songs. The Wing's songs, the Beatles songs, anything he wants to do. This is, I mean, people would pay to see this. Don't trust me, I know. They've told me and I said, I'm not going out on the road again. Why? Are you afraid of the popcorn? Right, because they sell popcorn outside of movie theaters and stadiums. it's everywhere now. They can get you anywhere. No, but for real, though, for real.

For real. I'm just joking about it, but for real. I don't want to travel with those two because those two get together and they prank me. This is, okay, so this is the real. Is this why the Beatles broke up? We've never heard these stories. More or less. It's only so many times I could walk into a doorway and have a bucket drop on my head,

filled with water or worse. I read that the, you know... Whoa, whoa, whoa, what's worse? Can I just interject? No, no, please go ahead, yeah. Are we talking... Chisholm? No, my God.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no worth it. I mean, a whole tour. No. Well, right, you run out of ideas, and then... No, just you're saving it up. Huh? Oh. No, you guys, those guys are like the jackass of music.

They're constantly just pranking each other. Bingo. Oh, my name's Paul McCodney. and welcome to Jackus. Was that a good liver, pudlian accent? The best. Hey, I just listen to you

and I do it exactly the way you would do it. Yeah, so, right, I didn't want to do the pranking anymore. That's understandable. It's hard to be... You know, you go to bed and find a cockroach in it. Wait, are you sure they did that? or were you just in a nasty hotel? Who's to say, but it was all around the same time of the pranking.

So it felt like it was all at me. Although the bad energy, it was a lot of bad energy. So you found one cockroach in your bed one night. Right. And you quit the Beatles. Well, when you say it right, when you say it like that, you're right. I mean, can you even be sure they put it there, really? No, you can't be.

Did you ever ask them, hey? I was always shy around them. Because you don't want to say the wrong thing or they'll throw it in your face. This all might have been just an enormous misunderstanding. I know. Looking at it now, all these years past, I can't help feel foolish for not speaking up.

And that's something we're all working on these days, right, folks? When we're in therapy or with our loved ones, things are a lot easier when you communicate. I like that you keep trying to engage the people that are behind you. I feel so bad. Versus, I'm like, fuck these assholes. Oh, my God. Can we talk about what you wrote for the book briefly?

Let's bring it up on the stage. You were kind enough to send us something that you wrote. You wrote a track-by-track review of, the Beatles record one. My absolute favorite Beatles album. Yeah. It's got the hits. Well, it was the best of.

Best of. Well, number one is not just best of. The best. Of. So you graded all of the tracks. Graded all the tracks. A lot of them got A's. B plus.

Somebody did some drawings there. I don't know who did that, but... Oh, those weren't you? I assumed that was you doodling. Oh, no, I mean, I did doodles and then sent them in and say, do something like this. And they did, then they did a worse version of my doodles.

And you were like, oh, no, I meant for you to do a better version. Right, do a better version. And then I think a lot of email exchanges, and I think the last one was just, well, you fucking deal with it. And then that was to me. So then I had to go out and hire somebody with my own money. I had somebody really great street artists. You know, tagging is what the, he was tagging everything.

It was tagged me. I was walking by him. And I said, you know, I jumped. I left out of the way because any time you hear a hissing noise from the spray can, I hate snakes, you know, so I jumped away. You famously are known for hating snakes. Absolutely hate them. There were a lot of your songs.

were about your hatred of snakes. It's one of the things everybody knows about you, that you have three children, that your birthday is October 9th, 8th, 8th? I say 8th. Yep, sorry. You might be right, I was guessing. And you just hate snakes.

Hate snakes. Can't stand them. So, ooh. It's because of the no legs, you know. You hate, because I don't mind lizards. Yeah. And you feel about spiders, they're full of legs.

Well, they've got quite a few legs, but I don't like how light they are. I don't like, I don't like them at all. I said, well, I'm with you. Yeah. Chunky bubbles? Big chunky bubbles. Big junkie. I forgot the big part.

Wasn't the song, Imagine about snakes originally? You know how, like, yesterday was about scrambled eggs originally? Right. Well, imagine all the people fit. better than imagine all the snakes. And we added an extra, but, yeah, imagine all the snakes slithering around, crawling into your shoes,

crawling into your coat pockets, getting, it was a Christmas song, and getting into the presents, and looping the presents with their tail and scooting them out of the room, opening them and slithering up to your bed and saying, you got a Lego set.

It's a ruining Christmas for you. So in that rendition, the snakes speak, and everybody understands. Like, everybody speaks parcel tongue or something. It was like that to me. Is that the case for, because I feel like watching the Peter Jackson documentary, it seemed like the raw materials for a lot of those songs

had to do with all sorts of stuff. Like, were most of the hits we know snake-based? Right. jumped in, he started, well, not him, but whoever shot that documentary. The guy who wanted you to perform in Egypt or whatever it was. Whatever his name was. That motherfucker. Michael something.

Egypt, though, Egypt, you know, a lot of snakes. Bingo. They worship them. Yeah. Remember when Indiana Jones, sorry. Opened up the tomb. Oh, my God. Pedy is crying again. Oh, I just, you know. I let it go when you mentioned Danny Boyle.

Incredible. I can't believe I got that joking. Did you miss it and have been waiting all this time? I did miss it. That's a great one. I kept on thinking about it. Okay, now you can relax. But Indy opens the tomb and it's full of snakes.

So many snakes in Egypt. Yeah, that's a big thing. walk-out moment for me. You saw it in theaters? Yep. Anytime it comes out, any time it's printed they show to theaters, I go see it. Wait, Indiana, the first Indiana Jones? Because it came out in the four years

that you were dead. Right. So I see it when they do, yeah, when they show it now. And then you walk out every time. I walk out every time the snakes come. And I don't see the end of it. I don't know how it ends. And honestly, I don't really know how it begins, because I'm always so late to go into the movies. So I'm there for 20 minutes. So if you wouldn't mind, just for a brief moment. Can you tell us what you think the plot of Indiana Jones is? Sure. Which one is this again? Raiders of the Lost Dark.

Raiders of the Lost Dark. Sure. He's got... Well, you've got the hat. You've got the hat, right? And that's where you start. It's about a hat. It's about a hat. And what's under the hat is so important, which I think is really the lesson of that movie, because we all sort of wear our own hats and what's under it is the courage and determination to sort of teach at a school. So you walk in when he's teaching at the school. So for you, it's a college movie. Right.

And I walk into that scene, I go, where's his hat? Because I saw the poster, he's got the hat on. So eventually he puts it on and he's zipping around with his whip and, uh... I'm sure there's a car in there and he throws somebody into a propeller of a... Oh, actually, so you have seen quite a bit. See quite a bit. I walk out and in. I'm all over the place.

Then I want to say that And I want to say the credits roll At a very inopportune time It's the end of the movie, right? Well for me, you know, inopportune Because I wanted to see the 20 minutes I missed Maybe if I asked if maybe just loop it back You just keep it on a loop

And then I can watch it and then leave when you're right So in that instance, the credits would be in the middle of the movie Right. have on God. It would be an interesting way of doing that. I think. So, in other words, the post-credit scene for the movie

would be 20 more minutes of movie? Right. Yes, exactly. You must really love what the Marvel movies are doing with the post-credit scenes. I absolutely love the Marvel movies. Yeah. I'm there at day one on each one of them. Have you ever thought maybe you should be in a...

I mean, Adam's going to be in a Marvel movie. Is that so? He's in Madam Webb. Yeah. There are no snob. in that movie, so you can come see it. A lot of spiders, though. But spiders.

There are spiders. That's fine. Yeah, but you will not want to see this movie. Why? It's not good? No, well. Thanks for the heads up. Thanks, Adam, so that's a good poll quote.

Put it on the back of the book. What does Madam Webb do? What's her deal? I don't know. But there are, there are, spiders. But we should continue to dig in on it, right, and ask you a bunch of very specific questions? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But what an incredible casting coup that would be to get me in the... To get you in a Marvel movie. I would have a dream come true. I would love to be an Ant man. Yeah. Ant man. Ant man. Quantum realm. Why would you want to be in that one? Get small,

get big. That's... I mean, that's really says it all. It says it all. I mean, you look around this room if we could read the minds of people in here. Every one of them. Yeah, my superpower I'd want is getting small and getting big. That's it. What else is there?

Flying around, you can do that when you're big, apparently. Sometimes, he's got the suit. Wait, who's big that flies around? I think he's more of a, no, I misspoke. I think he's so big he just steps to like the next country. That's better than flying, right? Just walking around. Walking around the earth.

It's sort of the flying of the flying of the land. land. That's a good way. Being a giant? Just walking. Walking as a giant is the flying of the land. Or you're saying walking period. Walking period.

What about cars? Shit. All right, John Lennon, everyone. Thank you. It's incredible that John Lennon's here. I'm getting some late-breaking news from Engineer Brett, who's backstage. Everyone, give a hand to Engineer Brett. All right, Brett.

Types of chowder. New England's clam, Manhattan clam, corn. We've mentioned those. Potato. That's right. Potato chowder. Fish. Yeah.

Shrimp. Yeah. I just want to say, looking over your shoulder, I am shocked at how many more there are. I tried to tell you. Why didn't you list any of these before? Because I wanted Scott to suffer.

And also it gives Brett something to do. Yeah. Cream. Cream chowder? I'd rather not, thank you. Tonight, when you guys are making love to each other. Please say, give me your cream

chowder. I love that you imagine any of these people are going to go home and fuck after this. Are you kidding? After this show they're going to be all horned up? I think this crowd's going to set a record for breakups. Why did you drag me to that?

I told you I wasn't going to like it and I didn't like it. Why didn't you bring your brother? Now we have chicken corn. Chicken corn. That's... Chicken in the corn?

Chicken in the corn? So the corn can? Chicken and the corn can... So the corn can... I don't know what that is. I don't either. Yeah. Anyway, a lot of variants of lobster and corn.

I mean, that's just corn. Yeah. So now it's just mix and match? Yeah, I don't know. Why would it stop at clam? Why not... Like any other kind of shellfish kind of scenario? Well, I'm saying, why would they make a clam chowder

and they'd say, that's it for chowders? Oh, yeah. What is a chowder? It's gross. Yeah. You know how disgusting soup is? Why do you do it? What if it was...

Because the bubbles are beautiful when they glisten in the light. But you hate children, you hate soup. Yeah. You love the bubbles. What if soup was thick, viscous, and full of clam? And if you left it too long,

developed a film on top. Yum. That's good bubbles. I don't eat the bubbles, genius. Why not? Why not I say bubble? Like, why not use bubbles to feed people? You're never tempted to eat the bubbles?

How? Which stupid question do I take first? How many do you have time for? I got time for two more. Take him than me. I think feeding people with bubbles is like a slap in the face to someone who was hungry. It's like giving someone a slice of Swiss cheese, you know? How?

It's like, just give me the whole thing, you know? No, that is the whole thing. The thing is the whole. Are you hungry? Here's a block of cheese. Hello. Make it last. I won't be back here for another year.

Is this someone in witness? protection or wait, what? I won't be back for another year. And that scenario he's the federal agent checking in on?

That's what I assumed. Wow. That was, you quickly, you talk about the flying of the land. You built that narrative so quickly. It's so fast. Which is a lot of backstory.

I thought I was really, who's the only person that gives someone food for a year a federal agent who's checking in on someone in witness protection? who's incapable of getting food for themselves? Maybe an Instacard delivery person

right before it's about to start snowing? I don't know. That's a long storm, you're looking at. Well, that's on the person who ordered it from Instacart. They only ordered a block of cheese, and that was it? Can you order a block? Can you order a block of cheese on Instacard? That would be a big wheel.

We should try to get one delivered here tonight. Do it. I don't know how to make that come true, but I would love it. Just a big block of cheese. Maybe your chowder researcher could get on it. You know that at like a 1.30 a.m. There's going to be a poor guy out front being like,

I got a wheel of cheese here, and the place is like fully closed. 1.30 a.m. Sir, we just ended 30 minutes ago. Where will you? Are you trying to get us to rush it along? John? I just thought it'd be funny to think of time in a different way. Okay.

Not unlike the quantum realm, if you really think about it. Well, you know, speaking of movies, we have another guest. And this is someone who has not been on the show before. Someone who did not contribute to the book, but I heard he was in town. And this is, I don't know what they did. do in movies, but I'm guessing by his name, he has something to do with movies. Please welcome to the show, Silver Screen Sammy. Hello, Scott. Thank you so much for being a fan of my work.

Hello. Thank you so much. So nice to meet you. Thank you so much. I'm Silver Screen Sammy. That's three S's, and I'm, of course, a K, K, K, What's that? Cotona's cutest cinema critic. Cotona, New York, cutest cinema critic in Cotona. Sight to be here on stage with such luminaries of the industry. Of course, the dragonfly from Doolittle. Of course.

Of course. James the Dragonfly, my number one role. James the Dragonfly from Doolittle. Of course. You're not going to have a lot to choose from. Later on Shark Tale, I chose. Adam Scott, I went through your I&B, wouldn't know any of your work. Did a thorough search, it would all be right above my head.

And of course, Chunky Bubbles, famed children's entertainer, love his work. Big Chunky Bubble. Well, of course, I'm sorry. John Lennon, Yellow Submarine. Oh. Voice. One of my absolute favorite vehicles.

Out of curiosity. Yeah, ask away. How old are you? Eight. Okay. That helps. That helps me. Critic, don't know Adam Scott's work.

You look nice, though. Thank you so much. No, I meant him. Oh, okay. Thank you very much. Okay. Thank you so much for responding to my PR lady's email, I've been looking for more gigs trying to get on stage.

Mostly on the small screen is where I work. Right. So what do you actually do? The tube. Yeah, you keep miming the size of the... Because this is the size of the screen and I'm Cotonas Cuted Cinema Critic. I guess I didn't realize

that you were an eight-year-old film critic. News 12 Westchester doing the movie reviews, of course. It's a bit of a family business, a legacy business. My father was a triple S as well. By the way, don't say those three Ss together. Otherwise, John here will think it's a snake. My father was a... Were you sleeping?

I was asleep. My father, of course, Stormy Spring, Sammy, local weatherman, Westchester, Newtown. He was a weatherman, oh, okay. A weatherman named Stormy. Well, no, his name's Sammy with Stormy Springs is the name, gotta have a gimmick. Gotta have a gimmick.

So you talk about, about movies, sort of like that show Blank Check. Have you ever heard that? No, I only care about the TV. That's legitimate. Although I heard their fans are rabid on Reddit. Weird access to grind

somehow forget all the context of the guests and anything they've done previously in their career. It's the kind of show that you listen to if you like hearing people eat on mic. That's what I've heard, and I think no.

Especially if you like hearing people decide what they're going to eat on Mike, and then half an hour later, they eat the whole thing. Once again, I've never listened, but I hear that some people like it. I can't imagine that's true. But I'm serious about the TV, and I feel a cultural responsibility because these days people aren't that media literate. Yeah, I've actually found the opposite to be true. At the end of the day, it's all.

about story. Movies need a great story. And kids these days, they love their Mario movie, but they don't know anything about film history. So I feel responsibility to get on the tube right there and tell them about some of the classics that they don't know about. Like what? Like sing two and Puss and Boots the Last Wish. You got to go back into the archives and watch the classics. Yeah. You're an eight-year-old boy. What was the first? movie or television show you ever? Sing two, followed by Pussin' Boots, the last wish. Have you seen Pussin' Boots?

The first movie? I've heard great things. Okay. Yeah. I did have a bit of a breakthrough recently. Oh, really? What was that? Came to my attention. Breaking news. I don't usually do that on the program. Usually stick to the film reviews.

But I got some news that, in fact, movies were made before I was born. Yeah, I mean, there's a long, rich tradition of cinema history dating... This is what I'm finding out. The very first movie of the train coming at the screen. Well, that sounds scary. Believe you, me, it was terrifying. I would scream if I saw that. Scream, also the name of a series of movies.

I'm learning, I'll take notes. Look, the point is... It would be good for you, especially if you are on TV talking about films. if you could get a better sense of like what are the most influential movies and like Jason what an incredible tea up you keep reaching for your bag what is what is inside what are you got in there I got a black Adam swag bag haven't seen it sounded a little scary to me that is do you want to show everybody that actually that is a it is a black Adam swag bag and a black Adam notebook wait it lights up it lights up it

Lights up. Absolutely. Oh, wow. Wow, the power dynamic on stage just changed. Hold on one second. It's exciting to see something light up, isn't it? It's fun. So, I recently did some digging.

That's a Black Adam thermos as well. Absolutely. Yeah. Comedy rule of force. Yeah. As it pertains to props. Of course. I watched the Academy Awards with my...

My father, and I went, this is great. They should do this every year. I hope it continues. And he said, they've been doing it for a very long time. And I went, whoa, Nelly. So that gave me a bit of a watch list. Okay. Oh, so you've written down movies that you should...

I feel a little, a couple capsule reviews. Yeah, I mean, it's a good thing to be a little more aware of the medium that you're You're critiquing. I'm trying very hard. I'm constantly learning, getting better every day. Now, I can't help but notice looking over your shoulder that on the top of the page, you've written Silver Screen Sammy to remind yourself of your name. God, how embarrassing it would be if I flipped up one of those words.

Anyway. So now, just to properly set the table, these are movies that you hope to see or move? Best picture winners I have watched. I've been going down the list. Going down the list. And by the way, I hope to see some of you and Best Picture winners in the future. Oh, that would be amazing.

Wow, that would be incredible. Did the dictator win Best Picture or? I heard that was a very chill set. So here are some Best Picture winners. I watched this is what confused me. Because I watched the Oscars with my daddy said, this is the best that cinema has to offer, and I watched some of these older films,

and I thought they had all sorts of problems. Oh, okay. Plot holes. Things sometimes don't age well. I would love to hear what you think about. Plot holes. Here's one I watch. Kramer versus Kramer.

Now, this is a wacky sci-fi movie. I could not get my head around this concept. It was the most confusing film I'd ever seen. I don't, Silver Screen, Sammy, I don't know that it was sci-fi. It's got to ground a movie and some sense of reality. This is what I always say

when I'm on the TV that you need. What was confusing to you about it? Well, because this premise is so unreasonable that a mommy and daddy would not stay together forever. Uh-oh. Oh, boy. I understand you're doing wacky sci-fi,

but the buy-in here is so high. Let me ask you, obviously your mommy and daddy are still together. As is law. I don't like you using those words. Can I ask, do your mommy and daddy fight the way that the characters was that believable to you?

Of course, and that's the little bit of relatability in there, of course. You know, my parents are both working professionals. Do you not know what divorce is? Well, I've seen the movie. I don't think it's really a concept that's going to carry through in the cinema, but... To you,

it's something like a lightsaber. You think it was made up for that actual movie? Technology doesn't exist, and it never will, much like divorce. Wow. Yeah. I mean... Next movie.

Oh. Terms of Endearment. Uh-oh. This movie was confusing. Uh-oh. This young lady splits up with multiple daddies. Apparently, the Academy loved that. And then at the end, she takes a nap, and her mom freaks out.

and the movie ends before she ever wakes up from the nap. I mean, talk about an unresolved cliffhanger ending. Oh, boy. This movie's got plot holes. Let me ask, was it believable to you when the mommy got sick? Of course. Everyone gets sick, including mommies. Like, but that sick?

I mean, is your mommy sick right now, or? Sicking the head, go on. When you wake up in the morning every day, do you see your mom? me and you daddy? In love. Okay, Greg. Okay, that's good to know. Yeah. Yes, absolutely. Have you ever... And sometimes she sleeps, but she always wakes up. I hope... I mean, I mean, that's what's supposed to happen, so that's great.

Have you ever seen the movie Loose Change? I think it should be required viewing for all eight-year-olds. I haven't. Tell me. Here's wide open. It's about, well, it's fun to have loose change in your body. I like that, jingle jangle. What else he got? Okay. Platoon.

You watched it. Now this is one of the wackiest movies I've ever seen. It's about the weirdest summer camp I've ever witnessed. All they do is play paintball all day, every day. But here's the thing. When characters in the movie lose a paintball, they disappear, and you never hear for them again. That's where the story would get good.

get good. How bad they feel that they lost the game. Do you lose at paintball all the time? All the time. Oh. Oh. I feel bad. I feel bad. I got to say. He can't hear us right now.

The French connection. Okay. Now, this is a movie about a bunch of grown-ups being very serious about baking powder. So mean. I hate that you're taking my baking powder.

It's at every supermarket. It isn't hard to find. This one guy hates subway trains. He hates them. Don't remember that part of the movie. He hates them. Some of these movies would probably play better if they were more recent. Well, I tried to go as mainstream as I possibly could.

How did you feel about the French part of it? Yeah, have you ever... Can I ask if you ever... Because we're all pretty anti-French. Well, I was going to say, Have you ever kissed a girl? Whoa, whoa, whoa. That's what you were going to say?

Or a boy. Hey, man. Hey, man. This kid's eight. I'm not saying you should kiss us. I'm asking, like, you don't want to understand, you don't want to help the kid understand death or any of these other things, but you want to know about French kissing?

Well, I just. You want me to kiss everyone on stage? My job on the diversity booking, by the way. What an incredible lineup of daddy's for me to kiss. Middle-aged dudes, that's who listens to podcasts. You put it out there, and this is what responds. Clearly, you book someone who didn't even contribute to the book. I would love to see this list in the book, though.

Maybe we could put it in the paperback edition. Volume two. Volume two. Here's another thing in the French connection. Oh, you asked me what I thought about all the French in it. No, loved it. More movies should have minions. That's what they sound like to me.

Here was another thing in this movie. They hate drinks. They love baking powder. They keep on talking about female heroes, but there are no ladies in the movie. How do I get myself a heroine? Where's the heroine? I want to find a heroine.

Almost no speaking part. For Ladies. More than this show, though. That's true. That's true. Shakespeare in Love. Okay. Right there in the title, In Love.

The weirdest thing happens in this movie, I call it a plonhole. The two main characters take off all their clothes and fight each other. They get into a round. wrestling match. They do some biting. I thought they were in love, not arch enemies, and then the next scene they never talk about it ever again. Silver Screen Sammy, I think you're misunderstanding these movies. The classics.

And I feel like maybe it's our responsibility to inform you about some of these subjects. First of all, being sex. Jason, go ahead. First of all, which? Sex. Yeah, go ahead. Did you call it big sex? I thought you said big sex. I heard big sex tune. I don't know what either of those words.

You both heard me say big sex. But it was being sex, the first of which being sex. The first of which being sex. Like we both heard big sex. Big sex. Anyway, tell me what big sex is. Okay, so big sex. There's big sex and there's little sex.

Okay. I'm little silver screen standing. You know what? I don't want to explain it anymore. Next movie on the list. It's too convincing. The first best picture winner ever. It's called Wings.

Now, they said this was the best movie the year. They forgot to turn the microphones on. I watched this thing. This is such an embarrassment. What a blunder. And then some years later, 2012, the artist, they forget to turn the microphones on again. Best picture, Mike Tush.

Whoa, language. Language. Come on, Silver Scream, Sammy. It's not that kind of show. I hope it's not big sex. Okay, here's another one I watched. This one I had a lot of problems with. American Beauty.

Mm-mm. Oh, well, I mean... I'm curious what your problems are. I think the audience... That's one of the ones that hasn't aged especially well. I agree, in my opinion, attempts to satirize the American petite bourgeois, but instead presents a pastiche of suburban cliches

undercut by cloyingly overwritten dialogue. And the weirdest thing is, two boys kiss at the end. That's not who kisses. Unless you're at a comedy bang, bang, bang, book release, apparently. Well, look, Silver Screen, Sammy, I'm assuming you don't have

any more. No, you're wrong. Second page. Based on what I'm seeing over his shoulder, the entire time we've been out here, he's been doing this. Look, I hate to put a guy at the end of the show and then cut off his bit, so go ahead. Okay, here we go. I'll keep it quick.

Speed round. Moonlight, this movie is about two friends who thumb wrestle on the beach and then spread a bunch of clam chowder in the sand. Now, what is that? Big Chunky Bubbles. Don't try to pass this over to me. The Godfather.

Two movies, two best pictures, six hours long, zero Muppets. Did you think there would be Muppets? The last emperor. This is nothing like the Emperor's new groove. Silence of the lambs. Okay, first of all, don't eat people. At least you understood that.

It's a moral tale. Secondly, Jody Foster goes to prison. Some guy throws clam chowder on her. Where did he get it from? Big chunky bubbles. Couple best picture winners I love. No notes. Green Book, driving Miss Daisy.

Crash, Gone with the Wind. And last of all, the biggest plot hole in any movie I've ever seen, I watched this thing, Schindler's List. Oh, oh. Okay. We all know the Holocaust didn't happen. Oh, boy. Aye, aye, aye.

What is this? Oh. Now your KKK-KKK thing makes a lot more sense now. Anyway, that's everything I spent. Silver Screen Sammy, everyone. And now a one hour Q&A. I see we've reached the two-hour mark of the evening, which... How's the cheese wheel coming?

Yeah. Is that going to come to us at some point, or... Did you run the show on a time? Minimum? Yeah, unfortunately. Why? I like people to feel like they got their money's worth, right? I mean, they got a book.

Well, I mean, if I went to a concert, I would want to see at least two hours plus. Yeah, exactly. You know, and a Q&A. I think I saw the strokes once. They played for 40. 45 minutes, no Q&A. No thanks.

Strokes. Do you know what the strokes refers to? A couple of the best picture winners I watch have talk as strokes, but I didn't quite get it. What? Well, now's

the time when you, we as the audience, would like to rank all of our performers. So we'll put our hands up. above everyone's head and you applaud for your favorite ones. John Lennon, everyone. Okay, big chunky bubbles. Adam Scott.

Jason Manzukas. Silver Screen Sammy. Silver Screen Sammy, you won! Yay! Yes. Amazing. Sing the song. Underdog Story.

Sing your theme. No, you sing the song for the winner, Scott. I heard you have a musical theater back then. And do your dance. Yeah, we haven't seen the Disneyland dance. Scott Ackerman's world-famous Disneyland dance. No, wait, this was you auditioning for Disneyland, and you had to dance?

It was a three-day audition process where we had to learn a dance. Okay. What would you have been... been, had you gotten it, what would you have been? I did get it. Oh, you, I'm sorry. I didn't mean, that wasn't... I didn't know. I genuinely didn't know. Who the fuck do you think you're talking to?

Language. Language. Sorry, Silver Screen, Sammy. What was the song that you danced to? Let's see, it was 1987. Right. So... Was it a Disney song, maybe? Oh, that's right

I originally thought it was she drives me crazy but because of 1987 but yeah Bibbidi-Bobbidi-boo Are we still allowed to say that? Only because it's so scary? I'll sing it if you'll do the dance

I don't How is this the second night in a row? Or of 20-minute Q&A. Like, 20-minute dance or 20-minute Q&A. Whichever one you want, stop. Come on, let's go out on a hunt-me-hmm. All right, you want to sing Bibbitty Bobby, Boo? Yeah.

But if you forget any of the lyrics. No. I know this song by heart, like everyone does. And everyone can say, along if they want. Sure. You ready? Yeah.

It begins with Angela Lansberry giving a little spoken word intro. I'm a witch, and it's World War II. Let's have some fun with me and you. The budu-dood-da-do-d-d-do. Aras-a-du-le-hi-du-le-bib-de-bab-de-de-bo.

A rapa-di-de-de-de-do. A squeed-de-de-de-do. A rep as a zoo, A big of your jew La Bebidi-Bi-Bi-Bi-Bee. Everyone likes to go to the zoo If you go to... Scott Ackerman, everyone. That was wonderful.

I almost broke my ankle again. Those are not the shoes for that dance. No. Those are loose-fitting shoes. And I think I got COVID for the second time. Sorry. You shouldn't be doing that. You're genuinely winded.

At 62, you should not be doing that. 62! All right, everyone. That's our show. Thank you so much. Jason Manzukas, everyone. Griffin Newman. Adam Scott.

Mike Hanford. And Paul F. Tompkins. Scott, Thank you, everyone. Enjoy the book.