Comedy Bang Bang: The Podcast - Jon Hamm, Drew Tarver, Ryan Gaul

Episode Date: November 20, 2023

The strike is over and stars are back! Actor and friend of the show Jon Hamm returns to talk about the new fifth chapter of FX’s Fargo, The Morning Show, and how actors secretly memorize lines on set. Then, music festival expert Jesse stops by to recommend what to do at Coachella. Plus, finance expert Doug Gropes returns to discuss his program to make people financially secure and read real reviews from program participants.

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🎵 🎵 🎵 🎵 Collect the Strike 3 and out ye shall be welcome to comedy bang bang Thank you to umpires Maximus 300 AD for that catchphrase of mission Thank you so much umpires Maximus 300 AD and welcome to comedy bang bang and boy. Oh boy Strike is over and stars are back.

That's right, we can talk about the projects coming out. Finally, sure we have had your right last, but he's a director, the DGA caved so early, but not this guy, he was out there on the front lines, coming up a little later by the way we have an expert so that'll be interesting But before we get to him stars are back And one of the brightest shining stars in our Hollywood universe Her eyes, virtue eyes. Where's it? It's a future so bright. It's so bright. I got a shame

That's right or at least look through what over those things you had to stare at your whole camera pinhole camera Refracted reflected light. That's right, or at least look through. What were those things you had to stare at through? Pinhole camera. Pinhole camera. Refracted, reflected light. That's right, you went to school to be a scientist. I tried, I tried, but I found the method too difficult. Really, the scientific method. The scientific method. So you just started like going at it in different ways. So I just wanted a method.

The scientific way is to work briefly for the cleaning products company method. Really? That did not pan out. So you were a method scientist. I was a method guy for a long time. Yeah, now you're a method actor. Yep, that's it. Are you truly method by the way?

Absolutely not. I'm what they call a friendly person. I'm a pleasure on set. It is interesting that all the method actors, they're method when they have to play jerks. And then they just act like jerks to everybody. They don't get cast in the friendly guy who just has to be nice to everybody. It's like delivering dead rats. That doesn't seem to be.

How is that helping your bullets dipped in blood? That's not fun at all. Didn't Oscar winner Jared? Oscar winner. Let's make sure we get that in there. That's right. But someday he'll win an Oscar, but he certainly won an Emmy.

And I was there clapping along from side of the stage that night. I don't know if you recall. I do remember that night quite a Yeah, I was looked over we caught eyes Maybe someday we'll podcast about it. But he is look he's a star and he's on a show that we can finally talk about coming out this Friday It's called Fargo, Season 5. That's right, he waited till Season 5 to get on this show. Our old buddy, John Hamm is back. Hello, John. Hello.

Going on, thank God you can be on it. Oh man, thank God I can freely talk for the first time in solo. I believe I reached out to you maybe a month ago to say like, hey, do you want to come on Bang Bang? And then you were like, no, the strike's on and I had forgotten. I have that little effect on my life. Talk about crossword puzzles.

I was like, is that why I'm not working? The news. Fargo season five. Chapter five, you know, recently, sometimes they give you these talking points and they say, you're not, you shouldn't refer to it as seasons because each season, each chunk is a separate entity. It's in two chapters are not like that in a book.

True. They all they don't just sell chapters of a book. But you can buy one book. Episode, not episode chunk. I don't know. Let's call it chunk. Yeah. Yes. Boy, that would be great for the go chunk five.

The goonies chunk to Electric chunk a Lou. Yeah, what did he do? What was the dance that? Shuffle shuffle shuffle. Yeah, I recently saw that over the strike. I caught up with a lot of things I hadn't seen you never Never seen the goonies really and I watched goonies and I was pretty it holds up It's a good film. We should do a John hasn't seen Show that is that is there's a lot. Yeah, where we watch things that you've, because you were, you were too busy acting. No, I think that was in the 80s.

I think it was probably too busy, like bowling and playing Pac-Man. I should have seen the goonies. I just, for whatever reason, didn't. You're, what age were you at when the goonies came out in 1900, maybe five? I thought, well, I was, I was 85 I was 85 so maybe I was a little old. It seemed like maybe it was a little too kid.

Right, I saw it, 15 and thought it kind of sank. Maybe that was it. But I thought I enjoyed it. So that was 85. That would have been right around Top Gun. I think I moved on to these factions. That's right. And now you're in Top Gun, Maverick.

Or you stare at Tom Cruise and you say lines like Maverick. This, you Maverick. I think making a third Top Gun are you gonna be back where it's like? That's what one's gonna be called Top Gun. Oh, God, no! I don't see how they bring you back for a third one. I'm sorry to say unless you're in talks already.

I'm not in talks. I think they very much could bring me back. Tom might be the tough one to bring back What you think you're gonna be doing mission impossible until the mission is literally impossible I know I've show up. I worry that I'm gonna be watching one of those mission impossible Movies and ten minutes and he's gonna die in it and then the credits will just come up Oh, oh well, and then then a thing at the end, I'll say, please don't reveal any spoilers. And no spoilers.

The first 10 minute movie. It's really the real crying game. And then suddenly everybody's just weeping at the end. Everyone's out there. Quantum died. They kept on seeing. How did they keep that? How did this is crazy?

I could have sworn he did press. Maybe they do an hour of his funeral, like after the credits, as like an Avengers bonus scene or something. Mid credits funeral. That would be weird. But you know what, I'll tell you one other thing that I saw during the strike that now we can finally talk about is that's right.

John is on season three of the morning. TMS. Not TMI, TMS. TMI. A show that dares to ask the question, what if Elon Musk were handsome? Such a strange alternate universe marginally more sense where he can pull chicks Not just any chicks

Jan Astin you had a big naked ass love scene with you and you were we were rolling in the sheets Yeah, what is equal to rolling in the deep because I can't I mean you did your share of love scenes on the madman sure But I don't recall none of them were with a friend. That's right. Yes Friends with benefits it turned into it. It really did That's right and the benefit in this case was sex. That's right Yeah, a lot of people don't get like what is the benefit is it like you know, you could money Yeah, some sort of like no trust fund it's actually sex really that sounds like a good better it was I mean it's not it's not a detriment friends with detriments that would be interesting

where they like it's starring it's starring Ashton Kutcher and Justin Timberlake there's just no women in and they're like what are we doing what are What are we, what are we, we're just friends. We're all this, this is detrimental to our friendship. We're in the same movie together. Tell me about the morning show. You're out there. You're a space rocket guy in the show. I don't, I'm not gonna give away spoilers even though you did have sex with General Rams.

Well, and also it's all of the episodes are out. So if you haven't seen it, that's on you. Exactly. They came out weak by weak. They didn't drop them in a binge, binge worthy lump but it's out there on the apple TV plus thing which costs can cost up to 25 50 75 I you know I do I do the apple one bundle I just bundle it just bundle everything I mean

but sometimes like you'll be you'll you'll you'll click pay on this apple TV plus thing you'll get the bill back it'll be like holy, holy shit, I just spent $5,000 on watching one show. I think you're clicking it too many times. I think just one click is the, is the, I don't know. It's the most expensive service, but, but tell me about what it was, but it's the best to be out there on you. What is it you and you, you B.C.?

What is the, you B.A.? You B.A. The fake network. Yes. You B.A. You B.A. Al B.B. Oh B. Yes. You be a you be a I'll be be oh be a Wow, that's Austin Powers Network

They show exclusively just Austin powers my colleagues from the Austin Powers universe Oh be a It is yes I play it sort of a mashup of all of the of the billionaires who want to go to space So what do we take from who? We got Bezos. Maybe Bezos is rocket shape. It's very phallic.

Okay. Musk's is, I feel, is more triangular and right. Okay, so you got the rocket shape from Bezos. I think we got the conniving weasily attitude from Musk. Sure. And then who's another good billionaire? Well, Jay-Z, what do you get from Jay-Z? Well, just a flow. Sure. And then who's who's another good billionaire? Well, Jay Z, what'd you get from Jay Z? Well, just a flow. Sure. Of course, that's what we should mention in the

morning show. You do a freestyle rap in the memory. Every episode, every as soon as I come into my own rap, which is a very, I look, it was a big swing. But I think it breaks the third wall. You basically go up there and start high-fiving the camera crew. Yeah, we go. It's almost like a Larry Sanders kind of thing. They start doing it it in, they're not on film anymore. They're like in the video thing, and I just go right around the whole crew. It's the backwards where it's like film for the show,

and then just cheap looking video for your rattle crowd work with the wrapping. But I think people like it. People like it, they people would shittomily like it, and think maybe you're one of the best rappers of all time. That's what I've heard, but mostly from the rap community. Right, yeah, like the fans, they don't really understand. They don't get it, but that's,

which is really not for them. It's the other community. It's for the community. Yeah, it's for the culture. They're out there saying like, wow, you're one of the best of all time. And I say, hey guys, I look, I'll take it. All I did was just shit out a few words.

I mean, I mean, look. Off the top of my head, or dome, as'll take it. All I did was just shit out a few words. I mean, I mean, look off the top of my head, or dome as sometimes I say. A dome, yeah, off the top of my dome. So you're out there and you're a billionaire and you're about to buy Ubisoft. I'm trying to buy, I'm trying to buy a legacy media network in this case, UBA, UBA, where the titular morning show is based. That's right.

Is it called the morning show on that or is it called something else? I can't remember. I think it is called the morning show. It's crazy that the morning show hasn't already been taken by any of the other shows. It really is, that's a, that was a easy, that's a way up. Yeah, like they don't get that title, I don't know what they mean. Good morning America today, the morning, I mean.

Today? Today. Oh, today. Today show. Today is one of the first things I do in the morning actually. The today show, the today show is. Right is one of the first things I do in the morning. The day should the bed ish is my coffee. It's on another network.

It's all toilet network. So you're out there and you try to buy the thing and then you don't buy the thing and then it doesn't work out and and you're a big side ways. And it turns out I was really trying to move money and try to maybe play both sides against the middle. But but but I but did I really really have feelings for Alex Levy, Jennifer's Anastance character. That's right.

Who knows? Maybe, stay tuned. But what I loved about the show is you and Alex Levy kind of break up and you have a big tearful goodbye and then you just jump into your rocket ship and you go, goodbye forever. And you're just like, goodbye, goodbye. Blast off into space.

I just steal John Levitt's failed attempt at a catchphrase and off I go, oh, it's so good, such a good show. Well, I turned into a cartoon at that part too, and it's all of this around your interest in the news. Woody Allen did it in Annie Hall. It's, you know, breaking, again, we take big swings.

And it's a great thing when you want to compare your current work to Woody Allen. That's what I really appreciate about you. Big swings, big swings. Tell me about Fargo chapter five. What obviously we've all seen chapters one through four. Well, on other shows, I've ranked the seasons in terms of quality. Well, no, I would like to, you're honest opinion.

What did you think of the talk about big swing of where they went with episode four, the chapter four, Chris Rocks. I thought there were some very interesting things in that season. Me too. I enjoyed it. I thought it was an ambitious season.

It's four in the total list. So now, let me tell me about chapter five. Well, I'm hoping it ranks higher than four. You think it should be you should be in the top three. I hope. I mean, I hope I think it's I think it's it takes place in the in the present. I think I can say the present day present day really. Well, or 2022. A pre-pandemic present, but.

So 2019? Okay, 20. So, every time I talk about the between two ferns movie, I mean, rolling that. It's foremost on everybody's minds. Have you seen this? How did they expand a three minute webisode in the 90 minutes?

Oh, interesting. It didn't work. Ham was great. Sure. We love the credits, but the preceding movies maybe not to our taste. They really maintain the integrity of the font. I think your time's over.

Of course. It's hard to say without really kind of getting into this specific. Is it gangster or is it is they're all crime rules? Yes, there is some there are some organized crime elements as there are in all of the season more like disorganized crime. Hey, oh, you know what I mean? These clowns in Washington anyway, go ahead. But there and there is as you as you stuitly may have guessed a federal government angle really the feds. So so I won't get too deep into it, but I play a character who who is a is a local sheriff who kind of thinks he is above the law

above the law. Yes, not in a Steven Segalway. And I'm like sure that Joe Arpio kind of Oh, interesting way for for those of us who else is in this cast because they are There it's always a star-study man. We got some big swingers. Juno Temple. Wow Jennifer Jason Lee Love both of them for fans of County Dave Foley Dave Foley is in this in an eye patch. No less incredible Where's it one I Dave Dave. Left or right? I don't know. Sharp-by-viewers keep a...

Maybe he switches every scene. That's what I'm saying. Maybe there's a mirror effect. Maybe it's not real, maybe it's who knows? Lomor and Morris. Great. Yeah, we got a lot of... He's in those bank commercials.

Yeah, he's BMO in these things. I found every commercial these days is for a bank or for a drug. It's like give us your money and then also just like you. I didn't understand the whole point when they're trying to say that you're supposed to call it bemo and the guy in the commercial goes, oh, BMO and the guy goes, no, it's just BMO. How is that shorter or different in any way? And BMO, no, it's just BMO. Well, okay. Why are you mad at me? And you John, you're able to critique commercials

because you're in 90% of them, right? That and I worked as a fake advertising man for a decade. That's right, yeah. You were like, okay, I'm gonna work as a fake advertising guy and then everyone was like, let's just get that guy for- Should I be in? Should he just be in home?

Well, I do like money. They listen to your carousel monologue then everyone was like, let's just get that guy for in. I'm like, shouldn't he just be in home? Well, I do like money. They listen to your carousel monologue and they're like, listen, but that guy and all the company just get him in here. What are you gonna be selling next? What's, do you have any coming up for the holidays or a Super Bowl commercial? Not as yet.

You got a landing offer. You got a landing offer. It's entertaining. So maybe a sharp-eyed listeners out there. Sharp-eared listeners. Sharp-eared listeners. Sharp-eared there. Sharp eared. Sharp eared listeners. Sharp eared viewers. I'm available.

Okay. So Fargo season five, it's on FX. It's coming out this Friday. That's which is incredible. 20, yeah. The 20th. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, so this Friday.

Something like that. And of course, this Friday. Something else this Friday. This Friday. This very next Friday, we run into this very one. And then something else caught my, or this Thursday, I guess, something else caught my eye. Just reported on deadline,

you are teaming up with Sean Ryan on a live action television series. Oh, this is a rich from today's headlines. Adaptation of the podcasts. Yeah, how about that? American hostage, what the fuck, dude? Well, it's a narrative, it's a, you know, it's a narrative podcast. You're cheating on comedy bang bang with another podcast. Well, it's a narrative. It's a you know, it's a narrative you're cheating on comedy bang bang with another podcast

Look, it's not alive. It's a scripted part. This is not scripted. We're not writing any of this down That is a scripted podcast. We're writing it down after the fact that transcribts anyone Transcripted that's a transcript it but remember when you could do that and you could buy a transcript of a television Shuffle like Jerry Springer somebody needs to do a documentary on the people that did that. Had to do that. Just holding transcripts. Like this was a great episode of 60 minutes that I bought. But John, why aren't you doing an adaptation of this show?

Because it would be... I'm playing the same character. And the same character that I play in American hostage. Yeah. That would be... Listen, write it up. Again, I'm entertaining offers American hostage was a yes was a scripted podcast that I did over the pandemic that came out

It was about a real life true hostage situation from the 70s in Indiana where a man Took somebody hostage and strapped a shot gun around his head With a with a thing if he dropped the gun that we would go off Right, and it was a 60-some-hour Ordeal incredible. So this is the this is a dramatization of that and it's got how many seasons do you think it's gonna go? It's gonna go one season. You strap different guns to himself like in different No, they're just just the one gun and they're just the one season for that one But then the the next season will be another hostage situation

a lot say perhaps Attica, perhaps Patty Hearst. Oh yeah. There's some other ways we can go with it. So it's exciting, Sean Ryan, probably best known for the shield, but also for the Knight agent. Okay, I'll take your word for it. The Knight, something on Netflix, I should know that. And did you work with him on the

unit? Yes, that's right. I remember. Because I remember we were all excited for you when you got on the unit. And you did like four episodes. I did. I did quite a few episodes. And it was it was weirdly it was between when I shot the pilot of madman and when madman was picked up. And I came back to do after madman had come out. I had to do one more episode of the unit because I the first I was cast by David Mammoth right on the unit who was directing that that episode, which was awesome for me. I was like, wow, this is great. You know, big fan of his work. Oh, Leanna. And, uh, holy, and, um, and, uh, and so I had to come back and, and they said, uh, wait, you're on that show now? Wait a minute.

That show was awesome. Because yeah, you have like a maybe very... It was a big hiatus from when we shot the pilot to when we did the thing. And then also a big break, I think I came, started in one season of the unit and came back. Right, right, right. And tied up my character.

Because you had like five episodes and it was, you were a very tertiary character. Thank you. And then suddenly, but it was great great because we were all like, yes, John's on a good show. I got a yeah, look, that was that was it. That was a job. Again, we're talking about network television. Yeah, that was like a CBS. Yeah, you be a prime 10. Yeah. Yeah. John, uh, these days though, I'm going to issue you the John Ham challenge. Okay. Name one thing you've ever turned down. Extrude desserts. Thank you. Wonderful. Wonderful. Well, Fargo is out this Thursday, I'm told. And we're going to take a break. When we come back, we have an expert. We also have a someone who's

in finance. Oh, that'll be interesting. We'll talk to a finance here, but it's, yeah, that's right, yeah. We're gonna take a break and we come back. John Hamm will be here. We'll be right back with more comedy bang bang after this. Buh. Buh. Buh. Buh.

Comedy bang bang, we're back with John Hamm. Fargo chapter five. Chapter five. Is out this Thursday or Friday? I'm not quite sure. It's a day. It's a day. It's a day. You'll know.

You'll catch up. It's on effects. If it's on effects and you tune in and there's a bleak landscape, chances are you've hit Fargo. Is this in black and white or is it in saturated color? Living color. Living color. Yes.

Beautiful. Almost like Wizard of Oz, like Technicolor. When you get to Oz or Fargo, as I call it, it is your eyes, it's a feast, a visual feast. I cannot wait. I cannot wait to see Fargo, a big fan of the show, and cannot wait to see you in it. It may take me out of it a little bit because we're friends. I listen, I can, talk about it. This is the John Ham guarantee.

You might have that experience 10, 15 seconds. I'm like, hey, this is my friend John. That's cool. that experience 10, 15 seconds of like, hey, this is my friend John. Oh, that's cool. 15 seconds later, you're gone. You're in it. You're in Fargo. I will tell you, whoever this guy is that's talking at you, he's going to scary a little bit. He's not, he's certainly not good old John. He feels he's above the law from what I hear. Sir, you're like, this guy might go rogue and I'm a little, I'm a little scared. I will say that to the point where you might text me and go like Everything will be cool. Are we are we are we are right because you're scary because you're scared even though I don't recognize you anymore

It is a testament to both you and Bob Odin Kirk's acting that Even though I know you guys well I Have lost myself in your characters in in all of your shows So and it's not like that with some people. Any number of people that I know, if they pop up in a show, I'll suddenly start to look at the sets and the props and realize that they all have sides.

You know, that they're sitting underneath the couch and stuff like that, but with you, I've definitely done that a couple times where you see something in somebody's back pocket and you're like, I know that, those are sides. But those are sides. I know that's a phone I know that's those are sides. Those are sides. I know that's a phone and I know that those are sides. And this is Game of Thrones. They shouldn't have either one of them.

I said, and we've talked about with Amy Poehler, like if you, any TV show, just realize that everyone is sitting on pages with lines on it. 100%. One layer under whatever things are on the desk, is this script. If someone's wearing a skirt, they're up there in the skirt. Like they're on. One of my favorite things are on the desk. They're hiding them somewhere. If someone's wearing a skirt, they're up there in the skirt.

Like, they're on. One of my favorite things, and you can go back and watch this on ER, was that somebody told me, and I don't know if this is true, and I certainly don't feel like I'm talking out of school, but the reason that George Clooney's character always had that medical clipboard

that he was constantly looking at, what the blood work was coming in was, because that was his lines. Yeah, there were way too many lines and they had to say I'm way too fast. I feel like we talked about this with Marylyn Ricecub where she was trying not to do that on her computer screen because she wanted to purely act. And then that lasted maybe half a season. You're going to have to just like put these up on the computer screen please.

Cannot do it. Cannot do it. All right. Well, that's that I never, I've never done that. You've never done that. You're a great memorizer. I am. That's one of my, I'm under my special skills on that day. How many pages can you memorize?

I memorize. Well, over 10. I've definitely done over 10. Have you done over 10? Yes I have. Last one of the second or last day of comedy bang bang, we did 29. Oh my gosh. And I remember, it was like 29 and 3 quarters or something and like everyone took pictures of the calls.

I did. I had to do that on one of the black mirrors, the black mirror that I did. There was a day that was the day that I was talking through the screen to the guy and it was all this dialogue back and forth. And it was something like 16 pages. Wow. But that was that was much easier because of it in chunks like the Junis. All right, let's get to our next guest. He's an expert. Is that a joke that was offline that made it online? No, we were talking about it earlier. All right, let's get to our next guest. He's an expert.

This is exciting. I've never talked to an expert on this show before, but please welcome to the show for the first time, Jesse. How we doing? How are you? We're doing good. I mean, at least I'm doing good. I don you we're doing good? I mean, I'm doing good I don't want to speak for John. Oh, I'm John. Thanks. Yeah stars are back. Stars are back on the show. They're back

They're you almost said we're back. I was worried. I changed it very quickly. I am not a star You're not there back. I I to be frank when I saw your face. I was like has he been at the star of major movies and television shows? No, a lot of people say I looked like a melted version of a real celebrity. Sort of a, sort of a Madame Tussauds accident. Right, although like Harry Dean Stanton, he sort of looked like a melted version. Rest in peace.

Rest in peace, of course. RIP, I'm blanking on what his face looks like. You're like, you're in between a celebrity and Harry Dean Stanton, I would say. There we go. You're in between. You're like, you're in between a celebrity and Harry Dean's stand, I would say. There we go. You're just melted enough. Between celeb and Dean's stand. Okay.

How we do it? You don't need to keep asking us that. We're doing all right. We're just still good. Still good. I will keep checking in. Because it'll change quick. It may, yeah, it may.

It's about to change right now if you don't get to your thing. Okay, that's true. You are gonna be now if you don't get to your thing. And that's true. You are going to be angry if I don't set up this privilege. OK. OK. Well, I am an expert and I am an expert on music festivals. Music festivals. I have been to all of them and I love them.

Let's list them. Coachella, the rest. The rest. And I'm glad that you skipped the rest, because mine is only about Coachella. Oh, okay. But there's Lala Paloza. There's outside lands. Sure. Glastin race. Bumber, shoot. Bumber, yes. Yes. Yeah. I feel like at some point when they started just going making making those names. I know. After Lala Paloza, I'll be sure. Bumber, Jim, Bingle, Dome.

Buckel, Bucky, Bue. Buckel, Bucky, Bue. Dumbledkel Bucky Buu is a good one. But I am excited for this year's Coachella, and I have all the recommendations that you're gonna wanna go to. Okay, because I don't think the lineup has been. Hasn't been there, do you? Inside and out. Inside and out.

I have inside info. Oh, God, tell us, yeah. I did it out in one of the Porta Potties last year, and they packed me away, took you to the office where they make all these decisions. And I'm a couple floors below where they make the decisions. Oh, wow. So I have been hearing a lot of cool. Wow. Tell us. I mean, yeah, yeah, this, I mean, Coachella's usually in April. That's right. And it's coming up. There's two weekends in April, April. And this year, you have to see Maggie Rogers. Okay. Maggie Rogers is going to be there.

She was there. Maggie Rogers has been there a couple of times. She has and she's back and she's going to be at the Dyson vacuum 360 stage and it's going to be very fun. This year. Interesting. Yes. And don't leave too early because when you leave, you will be able to walk out of there

with a few Dyson bags. Dyson bags. And I know those are bagless back you but they're bringing back back. They bring back bags to the Dyson. You have to carry your vacuum in something and that would be a Dyson. Yeah. Yeah. It's not the bags that go inside them. It's a more the carry dust. It's the carrying. It's like a travel case. A travel case. You don't want to get your vacuum dirty. No. And if you're traveling to a very dusty place, you're going to need that back. You need a dust you never know where you're headed and you want to have you

You do know where you bought the plane ticket sometimes. I'll show up in the airport and I got no I surprised me Surprise I spend the way do they always send you the most expensive place Yeah, they do it. Yeah, say loves that right? They Fully kill me. Right there. Are you a ticket counter? Are you in debt right now? Oh yes. Yes. Now to Dyson choose to sponsor this particular stage because they want everybody to vacuum up the desert. That yeah. That's what we're here. That's a solution that no one has ever talked about.

It's like there's a problem that probably deserts would know water vacuum that all up. We're taking a lot of dusty. We don't need. We could clean these things up. These deserts. And why don't we sweep the floors in California? So there are so many floors for us. I think we should start sweeping the floor waxing the fence. Yes. Painting the fence and then maybe wax on or wax on. Nobody takes care of anything anymore. That's right. What he does it anymore. Wait, but you're here to talk about Coachella. You're not here to go off on a chunk

about nobody taking care of anything anymore. You're right. I think that's a fun little side thing that maybe we could find something. No, Mr. Rogers' daughter Maggie is performing. I did not know that. That's an interesting piece of trivia that she has Mr. Rogers on.

Well, she comes on stage, she takes off her shoes and her card again, and then she does her music. So it's pretty cool. Anyway, by the way, about Mr. Rogers, I think he was wearing a shirt underneath that card. I would have been a very different show. That would have been so different.

Can you imagine episode one? He takes up his card. And he's just talking to children and puppets with a pump of the fair chest. Yeah, that wouldn't have been right. But guys, Fred Rogers, we've got a couple of notes. It's Steve from PBS. We got a couple of notes. Oh, you want me to take off the pants?

Yeah. No, no, we didn't say what we'd like. And then just hear us out is just maybe a t-shirt or some other layer under the cardigan. Yeah, real quick. Do you guys know if there's a Hollister nearby and if they're having a sale on underwear, and I need to buy the biggest loose boxers I could find what even know what a holester is Erra why do these underpants need to be so big you know, you know I'm that type of guy that wears jeans in his box is kind of right up and

Top you know that guy is there a name for that type of guy that wears jeans in his box is kind of right up and Bill O'Hughan is over the top. You know that guy. Is there a name for that sort of puffy Part of the boxer there should be there should be because if you you want to get a basically call that the Nimbus the Nimbus You want a Nimbus if you want to be a cool guy just overflowing like when you order soup And they deliver it in your port and a bowl and you're like holy shit This is gonna go over the top of the bowl. Yeah, it's not given us so much soup. That is the thing. I'll pay for it even if it's less. Or give me the soup and give me the little milkshake cup

off the side with the soup, that's a solution. Or give me the soup and then buy me new bowls. They're big. Should I go back to the bit or should we talk about soup? I don't know, I don't really know. To be honest, it's a bit coinfully, but at this point. Where did it at? Listen, you don't want to miss Calvin Harris this year.

Okay. He will be there. And then you want to grab a beer at the off bug spray ballers only lounge. You're going to love it there. I can love it there. Okay, what is the off bug's, oh, I know it all bugs. Off bug spray. Off bug spray.

I thought this was like off Broadway, where it is. Connecting with the bug spray. Yeah, I'm the lounge is only for ballers. Ballers only. Oh, okay. Yeah, I'm allowed just only for ballers. Ballers only. Oh, okay. Yeah, so it's your cool and you also hate mosquitoes. This lounge is perfect. For sure.

And you're clearly cool if you're coming from that calvin' show. Yeah. It's not his real name, by the way. Really? No. What's his actual name? Something else. And Hobbs.

Austin Powers. O-B-A-F. O-B-A-F is a really good network. I love that network. Guys, this year's Ed Sheeran set is brought to you by Paramount Plus. Wow! Very exciting. Will they be streaming it live?

They will, and they're encouraging you to dress up like any one of your favorite Viacom-owned characters. Okay, who are we talking about? It's gonna be fun. Kevin Costner and that's it. Yeah, I mean, I personally, I think that's the right stuff. Do they? Wait, I mean, it's a weird situation where Paramount owns it, but Peacock has the right stuff to be meant to be. What sidebar and really get into the dream you're about to get on the other stuff?

You're out of your own yellow stuff. Who owns that? Well, the federal government does last time I checked. Oh, right. It's your national park. Yellowstone who owns that well the federal government does last time I check National Park it's I'm gonna dress up like Gary unmarried or MTV news VJ Kurt load It's interesting that they've never offered you a part on Yellowstone I know that because you haven't been on you. Don't turn anything down. I Think it's interesting. I've never been an MTV VJ

I would love to see you on that I would do do it. I would take Matt Pinfield's job And oh yeah, absolutely that's that's you know, and I think you could be on euphoria And that's actually really exciting because the cast of euphoria is gonna be at Coachella. Oh, what are they doing? Yeah They're just taking pictures with people Honestly, that's all really anyone I really want. I can't feel like Coachella is popular, but people would rather the music not be playing and they could just take pictures. Take pictures, yeah.

I mean, the booth there is sponsored by 23 and me. Oh, yeah. How does that tie in? I don't think it's, I think it's just brand smashing. Oh, yeah. You have to be 23 years old, be there or me. Do you get tested when you go in there and they find out if you're somehow related to any

of the cast members? Well, yeah, they will check to see if you have any relation with Jacob, Alority. I did do a twenty-thin. The crazy thing is it turns out that Sydney, Swini is related to all of the rest of the cast. Interesting. Yeah, there we are going to closely relate. Very closely.

She's somehow everyone's sibling. Oh, strange. And none of them are related to each other. None of them are related. Yeah, it's just she's the link. Yeah, I did a 23 in me, and it was pretty exciting for me. I was a 1-3 German, 1-3 Irish, and then 1-3 old-used cigarette butts. Just kidding.

I was pretty cool. I can see that now that you mentioned it. Yeah, it's more into the skin tone. Yeah, I came in here on an astray on wheels. You guys saw that. It was like the weiner mobile, but for smoke, but it was just like a weiner mobile. And Scott, listen, you are, are you directing it at me? I don't want to slow down because I'm afraid we'll go off on a tangent about who owns Yellowstone. Do like, okay, uh, you're going gonna want to get VIP.

Oh really? You are gonna want to. Absolutely. What can I do? Well, you get access to a fake book marketplace golf cart. And that's gonna be very fun for you. Oh what?

I blew it. All I had to do was say Facebook. You said fake book. You said fake? Spook. Spooks fake book and I blew it You you get miss for something's ever so slightly and it's and it just ruins it Well, but it's a two-on-us Marketplace. Yes, you

Which is a which is a marketplace that only sells fake books right interesting so like we're talking moby dick, but it ain't right right interesting so like we're talking moby dick but it ain't right movie dick there's no way there's no way it's just about he tried to do it yeah it's mostly about a penis of vegan penis yeah the first line call who a ham exactly there's so each make no way to do it but yeah one of the most famous opening I pull you blew it. I pulled a fake book. You fake book that right, right quick. But first line is I dated Natalie Portman and it's all about Moby's dick. Yeah, they can buy a lot of that new story.

You should be an MTV VJ. Remember these things pulling trivia like that. Yeah, the fake book golf card is really awesome because on there, you can get a free neck tattoo of your favorite big tech CEO. Feel free to look down at your notes the entire time instead of trying to maintain eye contact

and then messing up all of your punts lines. But I want to look up as well. You know we're not on camera, right? I can't figure out if I should improvise or do a written thing. And you're hard to go back and forth between in the middle of a sentence. Somehow I'm doing neither well. And Scott, this year, Mezkel but plugs are back.

Oh, thank God. So they ever go away. They were not there last year, apparently we're upset. So go ahead and shove some smoky alcohol up your butt so you don't miss any of Diplos set. Okay. You're gonna like it.

Real quick. Oh, real quick. Well, you guys donate to my really long short film. How long is the short film? Well, I mean, it's about my relationship with my father and it's over an hour. Okay. That's more of a film. I don't know. A film has to be what? Seventy minutes? Yeah, it came in just below. Sixty-nine. Yeah. And it shot high-fiving me. Come on. Up top for that. Sixty-nine. Well, somebody say 420 soon, because we need to get a high five on the books with that.

Okay. All right. It's shot really well with the dialogues bad. Okay. You can fix that in post. You've already made it? Yes. So why do we need to get false?

Listen, I'm in debt. We've already gone over this. I'm driving an ass tray. I'm driving an ass tray. I'm getting killed at the ticket counter at JetBlue. They're sending me on these really expensive vacations. I gotta get paid back for this film. It feels like you need a sponsor.

Like if only one of these Coachella sponsors could maybe sponsor you. And you mentioned Mezcal Buttplugs. Maybe that's a hot liquor. It is. Maybe I coasts talk to Clinties. Cloonies. Yeah, there's a lot of guys out there making them. Cosmings me. Goes. Cloonies. Yeah. There's no guys out there.

Customing. Customing goes. Customing goes. Customing goes. Every television show has a mezcal related to it these days. Sure. Um, yeah. What's Ryan Reynolds? Uh, he's got a gin man. He's a gin man aviation.

Yeah. I thought he owned a full phone company. I know. He also that. He looks at other companies that are the most successful of all time he goes, I'm gonna get involved with these. Good God. Any owns a soccer team. Yeah, football, excuse me.

Excuse me. He also owns his own career, which seems to be doing just fine. It's like just focus on that. Damn. He's killing it. He is, but the thing about his phone companies, he's listening to all the conversations that everyone makes. Is that true?

That's true, yeah. And he'll interject sometimes. Sometimes, yeah, if you're lucky, he picks one lucky subscriber. And he'll just Deadpool quips. He just, no. While you're talking to, you know, to talk to your great,

because everybody talks on the phone these days. Sure, exactly. Maybe to a medical professional or something. And he'll just pop in with a couple of Deadpool's. Yeah, anytime I'm talking on your great, because everybody talks on the phone these days. Sure, exactly. Maybe to a medical professional or something. Sure. And he'll just pop in with a couple of dead pools. Yeah. Anytime I'm talking on the phone, the other person on the other side is using my full legal name. What do you have next on this list?

What do I have? Let's see what I get. Feel free to look. Time is here. Okay. Time is going to be there. That great. It's been, it's been a while since they've had line coach, I know. And they are back. If you love singer songwriters,

you're gonna love them. And then right at the end of their set, they are gonna throw their keyboard player player. God damn. You were trying to maintain eye contact. So hard to prove you can do it. So cool. Don't care. It's not blown. The punchline isn't blown yet. They're gonna throw their keyboard player through the window of a Tesla Cybertruck to see if it breaks. So that's really exciting. That's not one of the three-hime girls though.

It's just there. No, no, no, it's another person who plays the keyboard. Okay, good. Also, this year you get three free pukes in any Uber Excel. Oh, amazing. So that's exciting. Okay. It's really exciting. Yeah. It's got

real quick. Do you have a any parrot bay? Parrot bay. What does parrot bay? It's like it's a liquor that's it's a rum. Yeah, I don't believe I have any parrot bay on me. So I can't get a parrot bay neat right now. Yeah. All right. Cool. Just thought I'd check check real specific order. I think that one you didn't fuck up. I Think that I if I can get drunk I could be a little bit You need a little take the adjoke. We got a lot of cool drop-ins this year. Oh real? Yeah, you know when somebody comes out in the middle of somebody's set Sure, I mean the lineup isn't even announced so anyone is a drop-in to me But that's true Harry Styles is gonna be featuring Stevie Nicks

What very cool Phineas is gonna bring out Austin Butler's Elvis Really? Yeah pretty pretty still in care. Just still doing it the way that he was during the entire press cycle He is just wandering around kind of doing dances and he will be there. You know what? I'm here for it. I don't mind to see that. Yeah, for sure. Katerinawda is going to be featuring Ronald from Jury Dooty. Really?

Yeah. Which one was Ronald again? He's the main guy. I think I got a trick. The non-actor. And this time they're going to convince him that his whole family died. Oh, okay. That's terrible.

That's terrible. That's terrible. That's terrible. That's terrible. That's terrible. That's terrible. That's terrible. That's terrible. That'd be great if they kept pulling tricks on you. Like I know every season they go, okay, here's a new guy. Yeah, but if I hear that he rung in the world and all of a sudden, you're at the DMV, are you hyper village vigilant at this point? No, you have to assume they'll never make this.

Never. Why would they do this? And then weird shit starts to happen. I can't talk about it. You're like, what's going on? You can get him twice for sure. Because his guard is down now. Probably three times. Probably twice. I think you can get him twice for sure because his guard is down now probably fully twice

I think you could do jury duty again, and he would still fall for I genuinely think you redo sets did he get paid? I don't know I feel like they gave him like a big prize at the end for being on it They get or something. Yeah, like here go educate yourself. So you don't fall for this again case a pair of Yeah, they sent, go educate yourself. So you don't fall for this again. The case of Parrot Bay. Yeah, they sent him to trick school. And you won't get tricked anymore after this. But we are going to trick it. They just gave him a copy of the who's don't get fooled again.

Yeah, real quick. You guys going to spank your kids. A lot of us hasn't got a young child. Yeah, that looks the best of the plan. Have already spanked. You're already spanked. And they're really out on this. this where the respanking now are not I do it. And I say this is because I love you. I feel like it mitigates. Okay. It's fine. You're not doing timeout

She's pre-verbal though, right? She doesn't know what you're saying. It's more for you saying that or or I guess the Pre-verbal that was the film industry before the usual suspects. Oh, yeah, verbal. It was it was verbal. Kent great ladies gonna be with Chromio the one who goes on the one who falls out of the bucket. Well, it's a reference for maybe 2013 lady. She part of the fruit of the loom. Oh, that would be a good tie-in. That would be. Why didn't they hire her right away? Damn, that would be better.

Great, ladies, partnering with fruit of loom to fall off the stage and die. Maybe I'll submit that. And then we got Lemon Party live at the EDM tent. Oh, okay. Well, this is a good lineup. It's pretty good, right? Yeah, I mean, it's, yeah, it's a little different. I mean, that sounds like that's just the first weekend though.

So why don't you go through all of the second weekend. No quick. Yeah, quickly. I don't know. I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, because somebody bumped into you. Okay. After Billy Eilish, the Pope is gonna come out and talk about his opinion on divorce. That's pretty fun. And if you get run down, you can recharge

at the guided meditation tent sponsored by browsers. Pfft. Scott, can I get a shot of a card? I don't, I'm afraid I don't have any rumm of it. No rum here. So that's the one that's just... No rum? No rum in the house.

Yeah, sorry. Well, if your phone runs out of charge, don't worry You can go to the Samsung lounge and when you're there they automatically Air drop you a sneak peek of chicken run to so that's exciting Okay, that's really exciting. This is this is getting more exciting by the By the list we are on the last page. Okay. Oh, there's more pages. Unfortunately, yes. And they get less and less funny as we go. Not how they should. We should load it more and more. This is a lot like previous guests on this show.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I love diminishing returns. Yeah. Join hinge during post Malone set and get 10 free kissy faces to send your matches. Is that what we do on the inch? Yeah, he says not knowing. Yeah, I don't know. To be tattooed kissy faces. Yeah, you need that's true. That is true.

Find out if you're a shower or a grower on the Spotify Ferris wheel this year. So they're measuring you on the Ferris wheel? You get and measured if you get on. Real quick. You guys going home for Thanksgiving I Probably people are coming here. Okay. Yeah, we kind of only go home for Christmas now We kind of stay in town for Thanksgiving's that how it feels we have it at our own homes here in town We are we lippy. Oh right. Okay. Yeah, I guess this this is part of the real quicks. Yeah, these are part of the real quicks

I got the real quick. I got the asking for drinks. And then I got the, well, they're asking for drinks was part of the real quick universe. It is within the real quicks. Let's see guys, before Sam Smith hits the stage. Look, can you just do one more and do it strong and just read it the entire time? Okay, okay.

Let me pick. I like where you're going with Sam Smith. You did like just read it the entire time? Okay, okay. Let me pick. I like where you're going to Sam Smith. You did like that one. Yes, I think that's all right. I do. Is that the one you're going to end with? Okay, I do. Look down at it.

Do not look at us. Say, I want to connect though. We don't. It feels like the connection is the problem. Is the problem? I think just be reading. Maybe you're getting lost in Scott's eyes. Yeah, you're right.

He's got those baby blue. Maybe John was doing 16 pages a day. You can't even do one line. I can't do a thing. All right, before Sam Smith hits the stage, microdose while you sign up for TSA pre-check in the US Department of Homeland Security. You that word?

You hit our eyes at the very end of it when you were happy. You had the all of the little. Real quick. Yeah, can I get some yellow shots on Thursday? No, that we can do. All right. Look, Jesse, it's wonderful to hear this was really fun.

This is good. This was really fun. I really enjoyed it, but we have to take a break. Does that surprise you at all? No, it does it. I understand, but when we come back, we have a finance expert. You're an expert on double expert shows. It's a two expert show.

And I am in debt, So this is gonna help me. Yeah, I think he'll help you a lot. That's not surprising. When we come back, we're gonna have more with John Ham, more with Jesse and a finance expert. We'll be right back with more comedy bang bang after this. Da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da John Hamm Fargo chapter five this week at some point just look just turn on your TVs It'll come it'll come on at some bleakest thing you can find yeah just I'll be there just say Alexa bleak me Bleak me yeah, and then you'll get there also we have Jesse the expert is here

I love I love I guess I was notes I've checked out about that. I was just you're still looking down at a page I'm rummaging around looking for a little captain Morgan don't mind me. Well, let's get to our next guest. He's an expert in the the world of finance. He's been on the show before. Please welcome back to the show. Doug Groke. Hi, good to see you. Hi, nice to see you. Everybody here. I'm so excited. I got out of bed today. And I literally I put my feet on the ground and I was ready to rock the day away It's a rainy day here in Los Angeles, but that doesn't matter. That is just the Gods sweat raining down. I've always heard it was tears. It's actually sweat. You can call it any because he's working hard Hard, making money. God does working hard making money. Yeah, the driver's

Strikes over strikes over making God books. That's what I was going to bring up. Thank you, John. You're welcome. The strike Is that why you haven't been on the show in a while? I'm not allowed to promote anything including my I am a screen actor I think I am screen actors guild in that Hold your ass from promoting any any of my business. You're a sag muslim, right? I was a sag muslim, which means I'm one job away from making me leave. I'm trying to say you're a sag. I'm a sag. I'm a sag.

Yeah, listen, it doesn't matter. The day is great. The sun is shining behind the clouds. Sure. We understand how clouds work. What are you doing here, Doug? I'm having a ball. I'm having an absolute ball.

You need a list. You need a list. I have this. All these papers in front of me and I am going to read you guys a bunch of things. No, honestly, can I be honest with you? Please be honest. And I hope I can be. This is probably your fifth or sixth appearance on the show.

I would love complete candor from you. I owe you everything that's happened. All the successes with my business, I owe to you and I came here today to specifically thank you for all your help along the way. On my business is booming. If you know what that term means. Uh, doing well, I think. Yeah. I mean, if it's like that's a shock to me, I didn't know that was a popular term. I didn't realize that. But your house was blown up as a child. That's why you don't like that word.

I've had a lot of things blow up your house. That your house was booming. Yeah, my house did blow up. Well, if I can go into a quick story, when I was four years old, my house was blown up. And it was blown up not by a natural gas. And it was not by a traditional bomb.

It was blown up because a bunch of kids, I know it's funny to you guys. Just take a breath, though. Take a breath, I know it's a traumatic experience, but it was on Halloween and a bunch of kids came into the house and they strapped a bunch of what they called homemade bombs to the inside of the house and they blew up my house. So nobody was in it. We were at Epcot and Epcot on Halloween. Yeah, Epcot. Not centered. No. No, no, Epcot. The printing store? Yeah. We were at Epcot printing store. Oh, sorry, my bad. Eppson, we were at Epcot's.

We were at Staples in the epicest department. Yeah, that makes more sense for Halloween. Yes, we were getting because I get your business machines in order. Well Need to get more sion. House blew up. It blew up. And here I am. And that's where I get. Heart cut to now. Heart you are. A smack. What do they call it in the business?

A smash cut. A smash cut. Good news is, businesses, businesses. Business is boom. And you might know it all to you. Because you've said your phone number on several times on the show. 310-980-4053.

Anyone can leave you a message. That's your number. Please call me. You've been getting messages now for over a year. Over a year. Many phone calls. Sometimes I pick up by mistake and then immediately hang up. And there have been some mostly very polite text messages.

And when I say mostly, I mean close to 40% of them have been polite. But here's the thing. I want to thank you. And I want to tell you I am going to give you a little kick back. Oh, okay. This is great. I would love to wet my beak. Just get a taste.

Sure. And what does that mean? A percentage of whatever you're making. Well, you said what your beak. That sounds like dipping your penis. No, no, no, the beak is the mouth. Does it give you a little water? Yeah, it's a little taste.

A little taste. What is the, when I'm thinking, what am I getting, I'm getting it confused with something where you dip your penis. Yeah, I don't think birds have penises. I think they, that's not true. Also, and I know that. Pretty sure a penis has never been referred to as a beak. where you dip your penis. Nothing birds have penises. I think they... That's not true. And I know that.

Pretty sure a penis has never been referred to as a beak. What does your dick look like? Is it hard and curved? What's the thing on the top ahead of a chicken? A comb? A mouth? A mouth? No, the hard part is in the front.

Eyes. They have hard eyes. Now you're talking about the ear-to-ear down. A chicken beak is what you're talking about. You're a cheek because out you're talking about you're talking about chicken be sure that's him but again that has nothing to do with the penis well yours a mine uh here's a sharpened point you like that and open and yellow yeah and it I there was a bag of feed in here earlier and it's gone I don't know what happened Scott does keep his chicken feet under the table, which in this case probably a bad thing. No captain more of you guys.

So that's what I was planning to feed. Anybody in this room right now, can you look me straight in the eye and say that you don't occasionally poke your penis into the ground and eat pieces of dried corn? And if you can do that. 100% I've never done that. You've never done that.

You are a liar. That is a lie. You've never eaten corn with your penis. Never. Okay, well, I guess I'm weird. No, Scott seems very hesitant. You did not immediately answer. I'm not gonna take a stand on this issue, but.

What if it's grain? What if it's little loose grain? Little worm, little worm after the race? Maybe a worm, little worm. Have I ever tried to rub my penis against a worm? Let's sure. We're all human. Thank you. Oh God. So, Well, sure. Well, human. Thank you.

Oh, God. So, hey, here's a little friends. Yeah, you wanted to have a buddy, a similar looking buddy. I have siblings and I love siblings. I like to get my dick near other dick. So it has fun times for sure. I like you.

I gay. No, I like that. I like that. I like that. I like that. I like that. I like that. I like that. I like that. I like that. I like that. I like that. Just like my dick. Nearodis. I like that. Nearodis. I like that.

Nearodis. I like that. I like that. I like that. Nearodis. I like that. Nearodis. I like that.

I like that. I like that. I like that. Nearodis. I like that. Nearodis. I like that. Nearodis.

I like that. I like that. I like that. Nearodis. I like that. Nearod anything. Business is booming. Usually you're here to give tips on what people should do with their money. I'm always willing and I am, what would you do if I told you right now? My program, a 12 month program, is free. Right now for 12 months, you can get... What would you do if I told you you could get? I'd be calling that number. I'll tell you you that much I would probably say I don't have 12

months to devote to this so I wouldn't take advantage of it well I'll show it what I've shorts and so much what if it was six months what if you could get six months for free what if you could get three months for free what if you could get one day for free one day for free in the rest I pay for. Yeah. Can I tell you a couple of people, I need you to be my agent. I'm here for you, but wow. Can I tell you what a couple of people said about my program? Sure.

A couple of people have said that. This is usually not phrased this way. What would a couple of people say? Well, if you want to stick with the traditional method, you get traditional returns. Fair enough. I'm talking about pushing yourself into a new program. Tell me what a couple of people. Well, if you want to stick with the traditional method, you get traditional returns. So I'm talking about pushing yourself into a new program. Tell me what a couple of people is going to do. Okay, so this is what Sharon from Blackstone, Massachusetts said, the explosion of the test bomb

is a bravera of dance and imagery and sound, but also lack of sound. It's an understanding of power without any of the essential characters in that moment, knowing precisely what's to come. Now here's what? Now I get it. And you said that's Sharon from Blackstone.

Are you sure that's not Black Sharon Stone? Hold on a second, I'm dyslexic. That says Blackstone. I'm sure it's Stone, yeah. That's what sounds a lot like her. Thank you. Yeah, but this is... So many jokes running through my mind that I don't want to say.

Well, let me move on quickly. Let me move on quickly. Let me give you another one. It's a noble try, an interesting experience, and an absolute fascinating example of the director as a superstar. Can I say one more? Yeah, no. As emotional beautiful and thought provoking as this film is, it's that much more powerful because it's based on historical events. It's a film I won't be able to shake for a long time. Now,

here's the thing. Do you just take these people's word for it? I get my program. These are not about your program. Yes, they are about some movie. I can't help if a movie stole Mike. If you're thinking of something else, but these are directly, these were put on my wife. These are not reviews. Did you interview people leaving a theater with a haunting, Sillian Murphy as Jay Robert?

No, I'm not. These are Oppenheimer reviews a person who knows the most personal Michael that is fascinating as it is flawed now Am I gonna run out and get a product if I hear that sure but if I hear something like this Don't be intimidated by those long lines ET is worth standing in line for those long lines. ET is worth standing in line for. Steven Spielberg's story is the essence of fairy tale. We've moved on to ET now. Okay. No, we haven't moved on to anything. I don't know what you're saying. The word Oppenheimer only has half of the title ET in it. That is

interesting. That is how you know he's even being half the movie. E.T. was just that's for sure. 12 months for free. That's how confident I am. And at the end of that 12 months, will you be able to create a film like Oppenheimer or E.T. Maybe this will answer your question. But really, it does not really get much or any more classic Disney than it's a small world. With a melting of beautiful messages of global community, impressively artistic animatronics and a relaxing boat ride. No, the song does not get a compliment though.

I do love it. Small world has all you could want out of a Disney ride. A classic that is still heartwarming and excellent even today. Why are people reviewing this? Yelp. It's a really cool thing. These are reviews that came into my website on my program and that are helping people. Are you not even sort of intrigued? Yeah, I know when we started this conversation

you said I don't have time, but. I sure, yeah. I would sign up, I mean 12 months free, that's great. The Toyota Camry performances, stop the reviews. Stop the, 12 months free. That's great. The Toyota Camry performance is paramount. Stop the reviews. Stop the reviews. All right.

We get it. The reviews are through the roof. The reviews are great. But what happens after 12 months? Well, I think it'll speak for itself. I mean, people that have used my program after 12 months, if you're not in a position where you've become financially secure, then I give you all your money back. But we haven't offer we can't refuse. I know, but we haven't paid anything. No, you've taken.

Yeah, I was 12 months for free. So 12 months we get free back. It's $699 a month. Okay. No, I'm confused. I thought you said it was for free. No, I said, what if I told you Oh, I see. Well, no, no, no. So it's not free. So yeah, no, it's not free, but what? You could tell us. But Jesse, what do you think about this? Because it looks like you're zoning out. Boo. I live in a porta potty inside an office building, and I am in.

I am into this. I will sign up today. I'm going to have to step on my Malibu. I did have some Malibu. I'm sorry. I will sign up today. I'm gonna have a sip of my Malibu. I Did have some Malibu. I'm sorry. I did take I've been sipin on a dark and stormy over here Which I am loving but I did take one class yesterday. You did really how did you like? Well, you did great the new installment of Hunger Games brings everything that you love from the original Can you put that on my website? Yeah, absolutely and that's just what I was feeling. Okay. All right Well, this is how I mean it doesn't sound like a great deal

It sounds like the odds will ever be in our favor Can I ask you how you're doing currently financially because it seems like just by your attitude and your or in your energies, your... The strike is over, so I can not work again. It's time to not go to work. Absolutely nothing will change for me. I don't believe that at all. I've seen your movies and they're great. I mean, I know that you've probably seen one on OBA, Austin Powers Gold member, but other than that,

I don't know what other movies I've been in. Yeah, well, I've seen the ones you've directed as well, and then it really, really great. Kind of a, uh, choices. Not in the casting department necessarily. Not the casting was off. I don't know what you were thinking. Were you limited budget or what happened?

Either way, either way, what I wanna do is. I know one of the cast members said it was the most money they'd ever seen in their life when they got the offer. Oh God, yeah, I can imagine that. If it was over, well, this is the thing. Like when people are offered a certain amount of money, any amount of money, in my case,

any amount of money at all, in fact, will you take any amount of money to take this class? If I were to offer you to take my own class? Yeah, I want you to take your own class. I would. Here's what I worry about. You'll pay for me to take my own class. Yes, because every time you come on the show, you have bad ideas. You have to be mean by that. This time you've come on, you don't even have any ideas. What do you are supported by reviews that also don't relate to the product offered? Yeah. And I talked about his home blowing up. I worry that you're not taking your own class.

Yeah, what's up? My home. So here we are. I'm four years old. It's a day before Halloween. The printer goes down. I hear my dad in the other room. And he's like, well, what are we supposed to do?

Marian. That's my mother's name, Marion. But Marion or Marion? Marion. Marion. Marion. Marion, you didn't let me finish. Marion and Joan. Marion and Joan.

Oh wait, so you had two mothers that he was a bigamist? He was, I don't think he would appreciate that term, but yeah, he had two and used two wives. So here, we had to and he used to. He well, he used them both. We had, so he's like, well, somebody look up a coupon to staples. I'm like, look up how?

I'm four years old. We don't even have a way to look these up.? I'm four years old. We don't even have a way to look these up. So, I'm four years old. I called my neighbor. Stop saying you're four years old. He just wants, this is pre-internet. I think he's trying to say, he's pre- I'm running around. I don't have any clothes on except for, uh, that's four year old, what clothes?

Way oversized boxers. I mean, where'd you get those? Your dad was a bigamist. You're probably wearing those undergarments. That's. I'm more than an undergarment. Where'd you get those? Your dad was a bigamist. You're probably wearing those undergarments. That's all I'm saying. So I tell him like we got to go to Staples in my four-year-old voice. He's already said look up a Staples coupon. But go ahead.

Yeah, well, I got that. I skipped by that. Smash cut to me having a Staples coupon. And we go to staples Now the guy at Staples comes to the front door because this is back in the day when they had Greeders at Staples, okay. Did you just fart? I laughed it sound like you farted Please you have to smash cut to the end of the story

We have limited time here which stars are back, but they have limited time. Okay, so, so smash cut house blows up. We've told this story already. Well, I thought we were gonna read it. It did help, I will say, it did help to have a little back story. We understand where, you know, understand where you were coming from.

It was interesting, this problem. The problem, big and missed angle on it. It was really huge. I was maybe it also was new that this was a two-day problem Yeah, because it started on October 30 and then didn't resolve until October 31 Well, we didn't get the coupon more details coming out I do want to say that the bird feeder I brought in here is completely out of seed I don't know what that has anything to do with your penis, but yeah, it's got it's crazy What's happening in between breads? We are loose. Yeah, we are losing a lot, a lot of

bird's eaves to make. We used to make bird feeders. We would take pine cones and roll them and peanut butter and then roll them and seeds when I was young. And just put them in your pants and see what happened. That's a great idea. Doug, that is a great idea. We're out of time. No, I don't think so. I think we have plenty of time. I haven't even gotten to my program. We've talked about your program way too much.

I'll get it to it next time. I'll get to it next time. I want you to take your own program. So the next time you come back here and you're a financial success, will you promise me that? I will take the program and come back and report to you. Okay, great We are running out of time though. We only have time for one final feature on the show That is of course a little something called plug Do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do That is the John Ham Scott Aquaman extended remix of that song. It's just nominated for an Emmy. Yeah.

I think it was. Plugs. Interesting. That's the John Ham Scott Aquaman extended remix plugs theme by Wolf Pop Talk. Wow. Yeah, we really do. Do you remember that episode?

I sure don't. Neither do I. Boy, howdy. What are we plugging, John? Obviously, this week at some point. Fargo chapter five. Clearly that. I'm available for mouth base

and anybody's track if they would like, and I could realize how good it was at that. And Super Bowls coming up, so if you want John and any of these commercials. I will mouth base that, and it will be great. Fargo, a chapter five coming out. What's the name of your character? Can we reveal that?

Sheriff Roy Tillman. Tillman. Yeah. Oh wow. The Morning Show. Currentlyman. Tillman. Yeah. Oh wow. Um, the morning show currently streaming. All episodes, all episodes streaming Apple TV plus catch it. Uh, that's all. That's all. Yeah.

That's enough. That's plenty. Yeah. That's plenty for one year. Uh, Jesse, what are you plug in here? Listen, you, we, we gotta we got to log on to Facebook. Of course, Facebook is still happening. Remember your mistake. It's hard. But Facebook is, there's a Bible on there. Jesus does not appear in

it. So you're going to like that. All three seasons of the other two are on max. You can check those out there. I gotta check those out. You gotta check those out. And the big Grande Boys have a new season of the teachers lounge that just came out. Really, yeah. That's a great show. Biggranddaywebsite.com.

And you can just buy seasons. You don't have to subscribe or anything. Alacart. Alacart. No subscription. Alacart is smart. Mm-hmm. And Doug, gross.

What a long time. Christopher Nolan's most stirring plea the humanity yet a three-hour drama that plays like a Terce thriller. This is dark night movies. Deep sea fears first of what wait, hold on that's the wrong. Oppenheimer is a somber and electrifying dizzying and bloating a Contradiction that never quite comes together, but at the same time is one of Nolan's best and most political works to date. Doesn't come together and it's one of his best. Zach Galfanakis is undoubtedly the star of the movie. With a number of cameos from various Hollywood celebrities, this movie is bearable.

Bearable. And fun to watch. Also because it's the right duration. There's no storyline to the movie. I mean, and one shouldn't expect it in the right duration. There's no storyline to the movie. I mean, and one shouldn't expect it in the first place. There was more of a homage to that in his ferns, plus his very popular internet vignettes that pretty much everyone who has anything remotely to do with YouTube and Hollywood would have fun across and love. There's a lot that can be forgotten in the film,

but the irreverence and unmistakable style with which the Hollywood celebrities are roasted is extremely entertaining. That's all. Wow. Okay. There you go. Not the worst review that we got. I mean, listen, take that. Parable and then a bunch of comp.

Take that. Put it in your back pocket. I mean, if you, Frank, we were 80% on Rod and Tomatoes for a good, we can have. 20 hours. Well, that dropped, but I think it's doing all right. After three hours of viewing, you will understand up and out. Shut up.

All right, I want to plug. Look, hey, the neighborhood listen is over there on CBBWorld.com now. Also, we have new, a new pressing of the Farts and Procreation vinyl. All of the proceeds go over to Harris Whittle Scholarship Fund, and that's at Newberry Comics. And let's close up the old plug bag. What do you say? Here we go! As far as I Oh my god, I keep looking at my eyes, Oh my god, I can't even hear that.

Ah man, when we said under a minute, we did not mean 58 seconds. Be more specific. That's a sound of de plug back by Ding Dong Dip Shit, thanks to Ding Dong Dip Shit. And when I say thanks, I also want to extend it over to you to John Hamm. Stars are back. Thank you so much for being the first star. Oh, it was good.

It was good. It was here on this. And continued success to you. And what's your name? Jesse, I... What's up? Real quick. Could you give me some Malibu in a coffee mug? A little roadie.

Another real quick endug. Yeah. It's a stunner. And one more way, director, Christopher Nolan reminds us. Cinema is a vital art form, not a disposable one. We'll see you soon. Okay, thanks. We will see you soon! Bye!