Comedy Bang Bang: The Podcast - Kristian Bruun, Paul F. Tompkins, Vic Michaelis

Episode Date: October 14, 2024

Actor/friend of the show Kristian Bruun joins Scott to talk about the upcoming second season of The Recruit, his character Slugger Jackson on Murdoch Mysteries, and his college band Franklin’s Fault. Then, Malt Shop owner Bing Lujo stops by to talk about spooky malts, family dinner, and The Music Man. Plus, fire safety officer Hannah Burn drops by to share tips on how to be safe from fire. Get tickets for the Comedy Bang! Bang! Into Your Mouth Tour 2024 over at https://CBBWorld.com/tour Get access to all the podcasts you love, music channels and radio shows with the SiriusXM App! Get 3 months free using this show link: https://siriusxm.com/cbb 

Once when I was walking by, a little bird pooped in my eye. I did not cry, I did not sigh, I'm just glad Dave Matthews' band can't fly. Welcome to Comedy's Bang Bang. Comedy's Bang Bang. I'm pluralizing this show for some reason. Comedy's Bang Bang. Mainly because I'm looking at the submitor or submitress of this particular catchphrase. Chicago's little lady had an apostrophe S, so I added one to comedies.

Hi, everyone. Welcome to Comedy Bang Bang. My name is Scott Aukerman, and we're going to get into the show in a second. We have a... looks like we have an actor, we have a mall shop owner, and we have a fire safety officer here with us today. But before we get into that, I want to get into a plug before the plug bag. That's right. We have something pretty exciting happening now. You know, this week we start a little East Coast leg. We're doing of the Comedy Bang Bang Tour, we're doing Montreal on Wednesday. We are doing Troy, New York on Thursday, New Haven, Connecticut on Friday,

Tarrytown, New York on Sunday, and Red Bank, New Jersey on a week from today, Monday. But we have just added the last show of the tour of the 2024 Bang Bang Into Your Mouth Tour. We are going to do a big giant show, December 13 in Los Angeles, at whatever they're calling the theater at the Ace Hotel now. I think it's the United or something like that.

United Theater on Broadway. Oh, Shimee. What's up, Scott? United Theater on Broadway. Yeah, man. Have you been there? Nope. I know you've been trapped here for-

I just keep track of name changes. Really, any name change? Yep. Okay, so let's see. Go ahead. I don't want to. This is a subject I want to bring up. No man's goo.

I love it. Well, you know, the most famous one, of course, of any name change is staples.com arena has turned into crypto.com arena. That's right. I can't believe it's still there. Can you imagine? I mean, is crypto.com still going? Nope.

They had a fire. They had a fire of all the crypto burned up? All the crypto burned up in a fire. Oh no. This is terrible news, Shime. It's too bad. Yeah, it is too bad. You wanna hang out for a while?

Gotta go. Okay, see you later, Shime. December 13th, we're doing a big comedy bang bang live show opened by Hey Randy. The Hey Randy show is going to open. Two great shows for the price of one. December 13th, tickets are going on sale this week. I believe the pre-sale, if you have the password,

which is bang 24, is Wednesday, and then tickets go on sale to the general public on Friday. I'm gonna try to make this the biggest CBB show of the year. It's here in LA where everyone is. So I've already locked down a lot of the talent and it's gonna be really good. So hey, Randy, and Comedy Bang Bang, or Comedies Bang Bang,

December 13th, buy those tickets and come see us on the East Coast this week. All right, now let's get to the show. They both met on the set of Orphan Black, the television show up in Canada that was licensed by BBC. I don't know what the behind the scenes mechanics of it all was. Turned out to be quite a splash they both made. She went on to win the Emmy award.

He went on to star in such shows as Constable Johnstable. She became the green super heroine, the She-Hulk. And I still get hate messages directed. the green super heroine, the She-Hulk, and I still get hate messages directed at her via the Instagram posts we've shared whenever she's on the show. She wrote me a message and said she wasn't coming right before the show and he is here. Please welcome.

Yeah, I showed up, baby. Please welcome Christian Bruhn. Always here, nothing to do. Happy to be here, Scott. Hello, buddy. Good to see you. Good to see you. I noticed you didn't say stars are back.

You usually do. Would you have said that if Tatt was here? Probably. Probably. Okay. And then my follow-up question is why aren't you saying that now that Tatt isn't here? Why am I saying that she isn't here? I said it right. No, no.

Why aren't you saying that stars are back when it's just little old me here? Should I just say stars aren't back? Is that what you'd prefer me to say? No, I think you did it the right way. Welcome back to the show. Thank you for having me. So good to have you.

Now, we were gonna have both of you on the show, and Tatt wrote to me right beforehand and said she wasn't coming. Now this is, I believe, the fourth time this has happened. What do you think of behavior like that? I mean, she has an Emmy. She can do whatever she wants. That's how it works in this town.

Yeah, but I outrank her. I have two. Ooh, that's right. Are you part of the Marvel universe? I- Cinematic or otherwise? Otherwise. Otherwise. I am, and in fact- Oh, shit.

News of that will be coming out on Thursday, I believe. No, no, no, let's drop a Scloosie. No. Damn it. Damn it. But look for that news on Thursday, look to my socials, or if you're New York Comic-Con, you can check that out. So which movie are you gonna be in?

Are you getting your own movie? Is that like, can you get the kids? Now you said otherwise. So it's just another comic book, you're like writing or ghostwriting, or someone's ghostwriting for you, and you're putting your name on it? I'm ghostwriting, it's ghostwriter.

It's ghostwriter. Oh, great, perfect. But it's Nick Cage now in the comic book universe. We're drawing him like Nick Cage. Oh, perfect. He basically, after every scene in the comic book, you hear cut and then it follows Nick Cage back to his house. He breaks the fourth wall like a very Deadpool-esque.

This is actually not a bad idea. I want to read this now. But in any case, yeah, you guys are great friends, and yet, has your friendship always been plagued by this kind of non-reliability on her behalf? No, no, she always shows up for me. Hmm, interesting. Was she late on set a lot? Never.

She was like the first one at set and the last one to leave. Why is that? She had to be there because she had to be there early. Well, okay, so maybe like the makeup and hair has to be there as well because they had to like get her into whatever cologne. Sure, but was she late to that? I know that was before any of you got to be there because she had to be there early? Well, okay. So maybe like the makeup and hair has to be there as well because they had to like get her into whatever. Sure.

But was she late to that? I know that was before any of you got to said. No, because we would get pickups. So they would like make sure that we weren't late by picking us up, which doesn't always happen in LA, but in Toronto it's common. Should I have done that? Yes, you should have picked her up personally. Yeah.

Or in one of those self-driving cars. Yes. One of those, one of those like Amazon things that delivers packages. What if that came to your door? Would you get on it? Would you hop on it and start it? Like just a little robot scooter thing? With a little flag on the back?

Yeah, I'd give it a go. Yeah, why not? Yeah. Some of the hills in my neighborhood might be difficult, but. I don't know. With my weight. You want them to be strong enough to go up a hill. That's true, but usually they just have like a small order from in and out and not, you know, like a full grown man.

I'm surprised we don't see full grown anybody like riding those in West Hollywood. I have a friend who says, anytime you see one, kick it over. Oh, that's so mean. Someone's food is in there. I love these little things. Yeah, but they're taking jobs.

Oh, that's a good point. They're so cute though. Kick anything over that takes someone else's job. They're so cute. They are cute, that's a thing. Yeah They're so cute though. Kick anything over that takes someone else's job. They're so cute. They are cute, that's a thing. Yeah, but I would kick AI over. Yeah. If I could. If you could, but that's the thing,

it's all ones and zeros these days. How do you kick a one? You can't, can't kick a zero. Believe you me, I've tried. Tell me about it. I'm kicking you under the table right now. Oh wow, why? Christian, it's great to have you on.

You are of course the titular Constable Johnstable. And what's he up to these days? He's dead, he's been dead for years. Constable Slugger Jackson has been dead for years. What happened to this guy? This is a TV series, he got shot. He died off camera. Off camera? He got shot on camera.

And what, he just stumbled off and the camera didn't pan over? Look, there was three Constables. We were... Okay, this is an old-timey show that's still going in Canada. It's like 17 seasons now. It's called Murdoch Mysteries. I was on it for six years and I played Constable Slugger Jackson. And, uh... Why was he Slugger? Was he someone who would hit, uh... He was a baseball player.

He was basically a dirty cop who would hit, uh, all the criminals? He was a dumb cop who would sometimes get into fights and problems, but he, his first episode, my first appearance was as a baseball player. And that's how I got the Slugger. Hold on, hold on, hold on. Old-timey baseball player. Hold on, hold on, hold on. Old timey baseball player. Hold on, hold on, hold on. Back up now. The first episode.

That I'm in. That you're in. You're a baseball player that they, all these other constables are investigating or a crime happens on a baseball field or something? No, it's the annual station four versus station five rival baseball game. And I am a slugger on the other station and they want to take me out because I'm like their star. I'm their, you know, Otani. And so they want to, they want to take me out. And, and so they get me drunk until I punch,

punch someone in authority and then they arrest me. So I can't play the game. And then it turns out I wasn't a good baseball player and that they got that the game. And then it turns out I wasn't a good baseball player and that they got that all wrong. And then hold on. You weren't a good baseball player. Had, had you stepped up to the plate?

They had seen me crack a home run just in practice and it was a fluke, but they thought, oh my God, that's the ringer. And yet you came out and yet your nickname was slugger. I guess it's an ironic name. You know, so you, so they, they asked someone really name, you know. So they asked you to be on- And someone really tall is called Shorty. They asked you to be on this baseball team. Yeah.

To play against the, and it's a rivalry. This is the first time- The two stations are against each other. You had not played in it before. You were just hired as a cop, I guess. You're a rookie cop, perhaps? I was just a, could have been a rookie cop, sure. Or you transferred from another station or something

like that. I was transferred from that rival station to that. So this is the first time that you're playing against them. Yeah. You're called Slugger because everyone you're playing with on your team knows you suck at it. I think they just called me Slugger because they thought I was really good. And it turns out I was really bad. So even your own team thinks you're really good.

So much so that they start calling you Slugger. I don't think I've ever called anyone a nickname before I've seen any evidence to the fact that they should be called that nickname. Well, it's stuck. And Slugger Jackson. You can't just move on to it's stuck. Admit it didn't make sense. Are you saying Canadian TV is bad?

And not well-read? Now, now, now, now, now, of course. We all know, what is that show that, uh, Eugene Levy was on? Schitt's Creek. I mean, SCTV, if we're going way back. Yeah, before that. Before that, uh, he was in a production of Hare. No, Godspell.

Godspell, damn it. Know your Canadian history. Know my Canadian musical theater. Um, so in any case, you, so you, you are bad at, so you're arrested by, how do you end up on the force with all these other people? They transferred me to the station for some reason. Because you were so bad at baseball? Because I was a great actor that they wanted to work

with more off camera. Were you hired just for that episode and then it became a regular gig? It was a two episode arc. And then the next season they were like, hey, do you wanna be a recurring constable in our station? Because you're just such a good gig. It was a two episode arc. And then the next season they were like, Hey, do you want to be a recurring constable in our station? Because you're just such a good hang.

I guess, I guess they liked the qualities that I brought to Slugger Jackson. They thought it might be fun to have a Slugger Jackson around. So then you get onto the other police force and you decide to become a slugger in the real sense of the word of your. Yeah. I clobbered some people. I would say, it's clobbering time. And then I would start hitting people with billy clubs.

As a bid to get into the Marvel center. It hasn't worked, but I'm hoping in the next Fantastic Four movie that I will get to play. No, they cast that dude from The Bear, unfortunately. Does it burn you up that The Bear is more popular than whatever your show was? I mean, I'm on another show now. What's that?

It's called The Recruit. It's on Netflix. Oh, yeah. This is the thing with that guy. Noah Centineo. Yes. Yes. Yeah, we talked about this.

You say he's a really, he's a stream to work with. He's fantastic. He's great. And how many seasons are we in now? Our second season is coming out soon. Now, we talked about this five years ago. Yep. When it was just premiering.

I mean, do you want to get into the politics of streaming and how often they release seasons? Yes, I do. What's going on with Netflix? They cancel everything after one season. We got a second season order somehow. We survived the strike, which was great. They bring you back, but it's five years later. It's two years later.

How is anyone supposed to live? These are my questions that I have for Netflix as well. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, I know what you're saying. Doesn't make any sense to me. Well, that's great. You're on the, what is it called? The Archer. The, uh. The Archer. The Recruit. The Recruit. The Recruit. The Recruit. Okay. And you play some, you were telling me off camera some sweaty FBI guy? Yeah, he's a sweaty CIA lawyer named Yanis, Yanis Ferber. Yanis Ferber?

Yeah. Why do they cast you as a Yanis? I mean, I look like a Yanis. I could be, you know, he's probably like, what, Pennsylvania Dutch or something. He's of German heritage, I'm sure. You haven't done any kind of character bio for this? I have done a lot.

Please don't challenge my process, Scott. What have you done? What's your history? What's the history of this person? He went to Brown. And? That's it, that's all I figured out. Oh no,. That's all I figured out. Is that more than I ever did. Okay, great. Perfect. He's a great character. He's really fun. He's slimy, you were saying. He's just sweaty. They give me a lot of sweat sheen on my armpits. It's like you're basically

doing those Top Gun movies where they spray everyone down right before every take. A lot less sexy, there's no volleyball without my shirt on. But I- So there is volleyball, but you insist on having your shirt on. Exactly, I mean, for everybody. There's season one. I think it would be-

Hey, Shime! There's no volleyball unless you have your shirt on. Okay, thank you, Shime. No volleyball without my shirt on. Do you want, what side are you, by the way, on the Comedy Big Big volleyball team? Which team are you playing for? Skins.

The skins. Slugger Shimi. I see you're getting ready for it already. You're oiling yourself up. That's right, gotta be greasy. That's right, bye. Bye. See ya.

Volleyball isn't a game where you have to be greasiness. It helps, it helps. In what way? Because no one's tackling you. It don't hurt. Exactly, to be greasy necessarily. It helps. It helps. In what way? Because no one's tackling you. It don't hurt. Exactly. It don't hurt.

It don't hurt. Yeah. If you're greasy, it don't hurt. Yeah. There should be a rhyme. If you're greasy, it's easy. If you're dirty, it hurty. Yeah.

Something like that. All right. All right. So the recruit comes on when? I'm not allowed to say. I just found out the date a couple days ago So okay, let me back up. Okay, let me back up because the fact that they haven't announced it means we're still Probably three months out

But so they would tell everyone four months before then I'm like, okay, we settled on the date So we're probably talking February? Pretty close. Q1. I'll say Q1. Q1? All right. Noah Centinino fans. Centineo. Okay. Centinino is not correct. Noah Centineo fans are a buzz now. Q1. Oh boy. Q1. Not the fiscal year, by the way. Q1. Oh boy. Q1, not the fiscal year, by the way. Fiscal year. So April through June.

Yeah, we're going by taxes here. Netflix only worries about taxes, death and taxes. Well, that's exciting. You filmed it all? It's all filmed. Do you die Constable Johnstable style? No. What child- I don't know. I can't say.

Oh shit, I don't know. Brings me back to why are you shot and then die off camera? Because I think it okay. Well, they did that. And then between seasons, I moved from Toronto to Los Angeles. Basically like taking yourself out of a job. No, they asked me before I moved They didn't know I was moving when they wrote that one of the so one of the constables dies They knew one of the constables was gonna die because it's not a good hang No, it was for it was for contract negotiations because they wanted to figure out with the other people in the cast

So your contract is up people were making I mean, it's Canadian TV like our contracts are up every year, right? Okay, and so they're trying to figure out I mean, it's Canadian TV. Like our contracts are up every year. Right, okay. And so they're trying to figure out financially who they're bringing back or not. You moved to Los Angeles. Which is a cost that they would have to incur flying me back and forth for sure. But they made it sound like maybe I'd be back.

And I was like, and they're like, would you like to keep doing the show? I was like, yes, of course, I would love to. Did you ever say like, and I'll fly myself there. They said, what if we could fly you once or twice? Like, would you be okay with that? Could you stay with like someone in town and work as a local?

I said, yes, I could do that. And then? And then about a month before they went to camera, I got an email from my show runner and it just said, so. So not even two plane tickets are in our budget. No, that's Canadian TV. Wow. Yeah.

So was moving to Los Angeles the worst decision you ever made or? No, I booked a show that ran for a couple of seasons there. What show was that? That was Carter with Jerry O'Connell. It was a Sony show. Why have I never heard of any of this stuff? Because, I don't know, Scott. Because I'm-

You gotta be on one of these shows like The Bear or Abbott Elementary. Oh, you sound like every uncle I have. A modern family. You gotta get your agent to get you on that Game of Thrones show. I'll tell you, anytime anyone resigns from the Daily Show, I get the wonderful text from my mom of like, hey.

You know what you should do? You should get on that Daily Show. Is that what she sounds like? Yeah. Right, I thought so. I think that's wonderful for you. It was a great, yeah, I moved down here and it was great. I've worked consistently, I'm very happy, I'm on a job,

it's great, everything's good, everything's wonderful. Leave me alone, Mom. Okay, but that said, Tatiana thinks she can big time us here and just not show up. This is so long. Yeah, yeah. I agree. What the F, tat? It sounds strange.

I mean, we're here. I was making my big announcement on a show with, you know, big announcement about December 13, big comedy bang bang Hey Randy show. Yeah. On a show where we have this huge star on it, a lot of years on this episode and now, you know. Now it's just me. Yeah.

God, I can smell the disappointment. You don't have to smell it, I'm gonna just tell it to you. I'm disappointed. So am I, I haven't seen Titan in a while. Yeah, what's going on? You both live in the same city. Yeah. Used to be you would see each other like three days a week.

She lives a little bit further away now. Actually, sorry, a couple of weeks ago for her birthday, briefly, which was nice. You know, she invited me to a party once. Yeah. I can't remember if it was a birthday party. The day before, I reached out and I say, hey, what's the address?

And she goes, oh, I canceled that. What is up with her? Well, I don't know. Let's call her. Let's just call her and ask her. Could. We could. Yeah, we could do it.

We have the technology. Let me see if I can get her on the phone here. I'm going to call her. Do you want me to? Oh, I hear it. Can you hear this? Yeah. Great. to call her. Do you want me to, oh. Can you hear this? Yeah. Okay, great.

See if she picks up. What if she doesn't? It's gonna feel even worse. Yeah. Honestly. Oh man. Oh boy. Not only does she cancel the show, she wouldn't even pick up the phone. Oh, my heart.

It's a voicemail. And not even a personal voice message. To voicemail. Shimmy. I love a good toast. I'm gonna go. Okay, I'm just gonna ask him about his favorite toasts. Oh man.

May the road rise to meet you. Cinnamon. I thought he was an avocado. I was gonna ask him about his favorite toasts. Oh man. May the road rise to meet you or- Cinnamon! Oh. Oh wow. I thought he was an avocado. Just talking about his favorite horses. I think he switched topics. Okay.

Well, Christian, it's always great to have you on the show. Thank you for having me. You've been an old friend of the show. I know you're sad. I, you know, honestly, you're the next best thing. Story of my life. I'm sorry, what I meant to say was you're usually next to the best thing.

I was in a band once and we had a song called Mr. Next in Line. How did that song go? I'm your Mr. Next in Line. It's like a funk song. I like it. Just standing here waiting all the time. Girl, you gotta give me some condo sundae

cause I'm your Mr. Next in line. You gotta give me some condo sundown? Girl, you got condo sundown. That's a dirty sax. What is that voice you're doing by the way? That was my funk, funk voice. Yeah. Yeah. What does that, it's like all vowel choices,

but what is it all about when you're singing funk, you gotta go. Oh, girl Is that what I sound like a little bit? It's just you're getting into it. I get that you're feeling the sun down It's girl. You got to give me some kind of sign now cuz I'm your mr. Next in line. Those are the class I didn't write the lyrics. Okay, that goes to Dan Banger McKay. What band was this Franklin's fault? That was the name of our band in college. And then what instrument or what role did you take in the band? Vox. You were on Vox. I don't know if you didn't just hear the gold that came out of my throat. I assumed that you must have been

involved in the maracas or? I was backup trumpet. Backup trumpet. Yeah, I was second trumpet. We had a better top of the player. You're like the understudy? Hey, look, I'm busy singing half the time, okay? Half the time I'm singing. Franklin's fault. I thought I got a text back from Tapp,

but instead it's just all donations are six times matched. Oh, wow. Yeah, this might be the time for me to actually donate here. Yeah. Wonderful. Well, it's wonderful to have you on the show. Uh, we'll be looking for the, whatever the recruit season, season two, remember February, anything I do.

And that's maybe March it's, uh, Q1 that's you one. Uh, so that's between January and March, certainly of 2025. Could be. And we'll be looking for that. And we're gonna take a break here, but when we come back, we have a malt shop owner. You ever have a malt? I love a malt.

Yeah, would you prefer a shake or a malt? I would take a malt just because it's easy to get a shake anywhere, but you know, a good malt, that's rare. The places that have malt? Yeah, they're usually fantastic. Yeah, a lot of times you'll say, can you make it a malt?

And they go, we don't have any of that. What's that? Yeah. What's that? You own a shake shop, sir, or madam. Shake Shack, you think Shake Shack has a malt? Yeah, they do. Oh, shit.

I just ordered one. Oh, damn, okay. That sounds pretty good. We love our friends at Shake Shack. We would love it if you were to sponsor the comedy bang. Wow, In-N-Out. Comedy's bang bang show. In-N-Out is out. I believe they just have the shakes, yeah.

And they're not gonna sponsor you after that plug. No, these are all questions. And by the way, after you mentioned them and how light their food is as opposed to being, you know. Just heavy and. When you were talking about them being transported to someone's house, you talked about how light their food is. Oh, In-N-Out is so light.

We all know the In-N-Out fries are trash. Come on now. They're garbage. They're fine. They make them right in front of you. They're not worth lining up for an hour to get that crap. You think they're lining up for the fries? Give me that crinkle cut any day. It's not called In-N-Out fries,

it's called In-N-Out burger, you fucking buffoon. Listen, the burger ain't all that. The burger ain't all that. Unless you get an animal style, then it's good, but that's it. All right, I want you to leave now. Okay, this has been fun. Okay, bye guys. All right, we are gonna take a break.

When we come back, we have a mall shop owner, we have a fire safety officer. This is a big show, regardless of whether She-Hulk shows up or not. Regardless of no stars being back. And she won't even answer the phone. I don't know, we'll figure that. Maybe we'll get a call from her during the episode,

but we're gonna come right back with more Christian Brune, more Comedy Bang Bang right after this. No, no, no, no. Yeah. No, no, no, no. Yeah. Comedy Bang Bang, we're back here. Christian Brune and not Tatiana Maslany is here

and welcome back the Centineo on coming soon. The recruit on Netflix season two, season one's out there. You can watch it. Yeah, why not? Really fun. Great show. I love it. Centineo really keeps the mosquitoes away.

Oh, mosquitoes what? Yeah, Centineo. Centineo. Really keeps the mosquitoes away. Right. Sorry, Christian, this is our next guest. Oh, hi. Sorry, am I not allowed to talk yet?

No, you can talk. I'm sorry. Yeah, it's great. It's great. It's great to hear from you. I think it's Centinella. Okay. Yeah.

So Noah Centinella? Yeah, Noah Centinella. Okay. In the recording. I mean, you know him, I don't. You've never met him? I've never met him. Wow, I'd love to meet him. He's a stranger, which means he's afraid I haven't met yet. I've never met him. Wow, I'd love to meet him.

He's a stranger, which means he's afraid I haven't met yet. That's right, oh God, I would love to meet him. Can you put in a request to have him come on the show? Yeah, yeah, absolutely. Wait, in Q1, can you guys come on together? Yeah, I could do that. Can I be there? He'll back out right before.

Can I be there? Wait, are you blaming the backouts on me, Scott? I don't know. I don't know, it's just kinda weird. A case could be made, I suppose. Oh, come on. I wanna introduce you, sir. You've been on the show once before.

We met in Boston, is that correct? We did, it's nice to see you again. Nice to see you again. He owns a malt shop. Please welcome back to the show, Bing Lugo. Hello, Bing. Hi, it's Lujo. I'm so sorry.

Like Kujo, but with an L. Lujo. I'm so sorry. Like Kujo but with an L. Ah, yes. That's how you remember it. You know, the slobbering dog was rabies and wants to eat you. It's not me. Did anyone, when the movie Kujo was outstarring D. Wallace, did you ever see a marquee where someone had taken off

the top part of the sea and it said Bing Lujo. Oh no, I guess it would just say Lujo. Because the Bing search engine. I definitely didn't see that. Yeah, it wasn't invented at that point. I thought the sea came as a full letter, not in parts that you could take apart. Well, no, you could just break off the top,

meaning sort of like a Kit Kat bar. Have you ever seen the commercials for those? Do you have those up in Canada? Yeah, we have Kit Kat. You do? What are they called up there? We have much more chocolate than you have down here. Better chocolate, 100% coffee crisp, caramel.

I wouldn't lead off a coffee crisp. Oh, Henry. But we have the Oh, Henry bar, of course. Oh, shit. They've got the Hank Aaron. That's right, yeah. Hammerin' Hank Aaron. Also the $100,000 bar was named after him.

That's right. Because he was the first. He's got two bars? He was the first person to $100,000 with a candy. Yep. You must know a lot about candy. I know some about candy. Chocolate, of course, I got to know about chocolate for the mall shop.

That's right. Now, what is your mall shop's name, by the way? It's called Bing Lujo's Mall Shop, I think. We don't have to get into specific questions, right? I like how theater marquees, by the way, they now like say Megalopolis. Is that what it's called? Yes.

They'll say Bing Megalopolis. So like you do your own research on it and then come back here and buy a ticket. What? What is the Bing part on all these marquees? Search engines. That's why I was confused thinking you would say Bing Cujo. Should we start over?

Bing wasn't invented yet. So I corrected myself. Good job. Um, so Bing Lujo small chop out there. Hey, did you ever see that movie Cujo? I did. Yeah. First R-rated movie my parents ever allowed me to see.

Oh, so scary. I was too young. A woman waiting in a car for 90 minutes. No. While she waited for. I can't get out there, the dog's gonna bite me. And then a dog. I'm gonna stay in the car.

Terrible. Finally got tired of it all and just wandered off. That's right. And then credits. Finally just to come to the rabies. Yeah. That's the secret. Just gotta wait it out. Wait it out.

No, that was about, I read it way, way, way, way, many, many years ago. It was about a dog who got rabies, but then they started to suspect maybe it's Satan, right? I don't remember that part. I think they- I think there was some sort of like, maybe this is possessed by the devil. Was there- Like the family thought that? Or you the reader do? No, he just got bitten on the nose by a bat. No, or the narrator was trying to imply it perhaps. I don't think so. When you read a Stephen King book,

do you imagine his voice saying all the words? Yeah. Imagine a coke that was mine. That's definitely in the Coke Eats. Talking a mile a minute. How does he write so many books these days without the Coke? Amphetamines? Yeah. Trucker's Speed? Yeah, baby trucker's speed. Baby lot of coffee. Yeah. How does he write so many books these days without the Coke? Amphetamines?

Yeah. Trucker's Speed? Trucker's Speed. Baby black coffee. I like when you come out there and you're like, oh yeah, I stopped doing Coke. I did so much of it. And then you're like, I still do the Trucker's Speed. Write some of the books.

Yeah, I like that. I like that too. I like that. Great to have you on the show. It's great to be back. Yeah. Now remind me what we talked about last time. Well, we talked about maltids and shakes.

That's right. That's my stock and trade, of course. Yes, you've perfected those, have you not? I like to think so. My customers are complaining. Yeah. Do you like a shake? Do you like a maltid?

I like a maltid over a shake, but I'll take either. So you pour one on top of the other. Yeah, I do, like a sandwich. That's decadent. Like a sandwich just has bread. You're like Caligula. Yeah, in more ways than one. What's another one?

I've just recently been re-released without all the sex. What? Did that happen? Why would they do that? I don't know. I tell you, I remember going over to my friend's house and watching that movie and it was just me and him and then his grandmother came home and then there was a big sex scene going on, intercut with scenes of Malcolm McDowell going,

oh, all of you enjoy yourselves or whatever you think. And she would look at the screen anytime Malcolm McDowell was on and then look away whenever the sex would happen. We was making us laugh so hard that it just was naturally occurring until finally she looked at the screen and there was a blow job happening and she went,

oh, he's eating his thing. Still lodged in my head 40 years later. In any case, Bing, it's wonderful to have you on the show. And your friend was Tony Soprano? Yes. That was his grandmother? He started the bada bing. Your friend, Paulie Waller?

Based on that. His grandma came home? Based on that, yeah. He said, well, if it rhymes, it's good enough. I love Collegue. That's a good movie. What's your favorite movie, Bing? Favorite movie of all time.

Of all time, okay, or we could say within the last three months. I mean, oh within the last three months? Sure. If you need some parameters, maybe that'll help you whittle it down. Tell you what, in the last week, favorite movie that came out in the last week?

The Max We Do of Salem Slot. Okay, great. Of all the movies that came out last week that I saw, my favorite. Spooky Season is right around the corner, right? Some would say we're experiencing it right now. Well, it's October, you know, it's spooky season. We're serving special spooky malts. Do you really? What are these? They're orange. Okay. Or black. Okay, no combination? No, it doesn't work. That would just be a dark orange. It's just dark orange or light black.

Yeah. Or sometimes purple. Purple's now been folded into the Halloween color palette. Isn't that strange? Well, you know what it needed it to. It is, I mean, I guess it is the color of some seasonal vegetables. Exactly. That's why I think Halloween is orange so much is because of the pumpkin.

I think you're right. If the pumpkin did not exist, I think Halloween would all be black. That could be a world where the pumpkin did not exist. What would be different in that world? Let's see. The great pumpkin of Charlie Brown fame would not world? Let's see. The great pumpkin of Charlie Brown fame would not exist. That's right. It would just be called Charlie Brown. It's Charlie Brown.

It's Charlie Brown. It's Charlie Brown. And then Charlie Brown would come out, look at the screen, office style. All the kids just hanging around for a while. I would love to see it. Commercials for Donnelly Madison's back cakes. And then it's over. Love to see a Charlie Brown special now

where it's shot like the office, where like all these snaps zooms and he looks into the camera. Oh, I'm good. You don't wanna see this? Nope. Okay, all right. So orange-

I'm not trying to yucky on y'all. Cause you said you'd love to see that, but for me, no. Okay, so orange, purple or black milkshakes, do they have any special flavor? And malted. And malted. Yes, we got a pumpkin spice.

Is that the black one, or is that the purple one, or is that the orange one? It's the orange one. The black one tastes like anything. It's like licorice, like black licorice. Now, is that selling well? No. I have that.

I love it. I love black licorice. Now is that selling well? No. I'd have that. I love it. I love black licorice. I'm very old man. And so I grew up with shitty candy. Yeah, like licorice all sorts. Yeah, licorice all sorts. But it was wonderful to have it because that was all you wanted.

Of course. Like you want a special treat. Here's some hardtack. Hardtack? Yeah. How old are you? Here's some cinnamon hardtack. He's very, very old. Mm, mm, mm, mm. Cantack? Yeah. How old are you? Here's some cinnamon hardtack. He's very, very old.

Mm, mm, mm, mm. Yeah. Can't find it anymore. Now what is the purple milkshake? Is that beets? Yep. Beets are red. It tastes like beets.

Beets can be purple-ish. Beets can be purple. They got purple beets? Radish, oh radish is purple. You sound like you're going into the headphone store. You know what I bought? I bought some vegetables. What? So what, you bought this, these headphone store. You know what, I brought some vegetables. What? So what you brought, I just need some vegetables.

So which one's the purple eggplant? Eggplant. Eggplant. Of a moji thing. You have a certain sweet potatoes. Oh, Japanese sweet potatoes. We know a certain sweet potato. I sound like I'm Dumas.

Is that how it's pronounced, Dubois? Who? You know that Instagram handle that tells, I sound like I'm Du-ma. Is that how it's pronounced? Du-wa? Who? You know that Instagram handle that does blind items? Oh, doi-wa. Doi-ma. Is it doi-ma? That sounds kind of insulting.

I didn't say that, so it's not that. You did say that. Doi. Doi-ma. Doi-wa. This is like that scene from The Pink Panther with Steve Martin about the burger. That's The Pink Panther that you know? No, I go to the classics.

I go to the originals. It's just that burger scene is ridiculous. I thought it was Dieu Moi. Good. I agree. And I believe I'm correct. I think you are. Dieu Moi.

Do you speak French? That's beautiful French. I do not. All right. That was funny. That was funny. Oh, he's doing the King Tut. That's I do not You remember a lot of people too young to remember at the time King Tut they just found them right and so that yeah They were just like King Tut, they just found him, right? Yeah, they were just like, who the fuck is this?

King Tut? King Tut, they sent him on it because they'd heard of him. Yeah. And then they found him, like, oh, King Cut. So let's- King Cut. King Cut? I'm that King Tut.

Sometimes my dentures slip a little bit. And so they sent him on a tour all over the place. Yeah, they're like, everyone's going to want to do this. Look at this dead guy. Yeah. And then Steve Wighton said, I got to get a look at look at this dead guy. Yeah, and then Steve Watson said I got a race all around this Yeah, this is the kind of thing that deserves to be a try. That's right. I'm like, what was your song called? the condo next in line

Yeah, what is the name of the band Franklin's fault? Any recordings out there? Yes. There's a few there There's a few out there. Where can people find you? Hopefully nowhere. Everybody get on big and look for Franklin's fault. Big Franklin's fault. Oh, Jesus. Bing Cujo. Bing Cujo?

No, come on. I would love for people to Bing Cujo these days because I feel like everyone's forgotten about Cujo. Yeah. I like how they forgot about Dre. Nowadays, everybody wants to. Go for it. Do it. Do the whole thing. Let's go. People have remembered Dre. People. I felt like, see, this is the thing when they came out with that song, it was like, oh, and everybody's talking about it. Everybody's forgotten, forgotten about Dre. Like, this was maybe three years after

his last song. Like people are still talking about it. You know what I mean? Right. Yeah. So the whole premise I don't buy into. Okay, okay. Nowadays, sure. Okay. He hasn't put out anything in a while. He owns Beats, he owns Beats, doesn't he? He did do the Super Bowl.

So I would say like it's on the wane, but come three years from now, yeah, maybe people won't be talking about Drake, but at the time, no. Right. Well, no. Right. Well, that's settled. But do you agree? I'm duly aware of who these people are.

You don't know who Dr. Dre is? Oh, he's a doctor, good for him. M&M, you must deal with a lot of M&Ms at your place. Why? Because it's a mall shop. You don't ever get requested to like, toss some M&Ms on top of that bad boy? We do, a lot of people,

they think we're like a friendlies. Are you familiar with that saying friendlies? Yeah. And friendlies will use a lot of candy in their shakes. Oreo cookies you like. Yeah, we don't do that. Just purely the flavor. Just purely the flavor.

They should call you unfriendlies. Please cut that out. Oh, really? I don't think that's good to have that out there. I don't think I can. Let me make a note. Please make an apology. If you can't, I still haven't gotten an editing mission.

No, let me jot down the time code. If you can't cut it out, please make a formal apology right now. Okay, I apologize to. Formal, I said. Like black tie or white? Well, just be more fancy about it. I hereby.

There we go. I would love that when a certain ex-president would write the word hereby in a tweet to make it sound more official. I hereby wish to extend my sincere apologies to Bing Lu Joe, AKA Bing Cujo. No, come on. I'm having a little fun in my formal apologies. It's gotta be formal. Formal's not fun.

Everybody hates it. So you gotta hate while you do it. Have you ever dressed for dinner, meaning like white tails? When I was little, of course, we had to. The whole family dressed formally for dinner. We were very poor. What year was this?

Every year. Every year. What a drag that was back in the day. You would have to go into the closet and get all dressed up and then come out. And then the littlest one would have to go into the closet and get all dressed up and then come out. And then the littlest one would have to announce the next biggest one and so on and so on. Yeah. So, Do Re Mi Fa So La Ti Do style or whatever the-

I don't know that. Good night, farewell. That's what I'm thinking of. No, this was at dinner time. Oh, yes, sure. So, I was the littlest one. So it's a reverse good night, farewell. I was, okay, if you like. I don't know what that would, I was a little. So it's a reverse good night, farewell. I was okay.

If you like, I don't know what that is. I was a little. Sound of music, hon. I don't know what that is. I mean, I know the concept. You've heard, you know, what the music sounds like. La la la la la la la la la. You're almost doing Doe of Deer.

What is that? Sing what you were just singing, but sing the words Doe Adir. La la la la la la la la la. But then. Doe Adir, Doe Adir, Doe Adir, Doe Adir. You're halfway there. Is this a Franklin's fault number?

They weren't that sophisticated. Doe Adir, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop. Mac, I'm trumpet, come on in. Oh no, our trumpet players falling ill. Look, I can cover, I can cover, but I gotta sing. What were we talking about? We were talking about M&Ms and how you refused to put them in your shape.

I think we were past that. Okay, we were talking about, oh yes, you go home. You would dress for dinner. I would dress for dinner, so I would go to the closet and I would put on my little tuxedo and I would come out and I would go into the closet and I would put on my little tuxedo and I would come out and I would say, Greta Lujo! And then my little sister would walk in. And then- Wait, you were the- My older sister, but she was very little.

She was little at the time. She was the littlest one in the family. Right. Oh, height. But she was older than me. Right. Every wise. So height, width? Depth.

Every wise. So height, width? Depth. The three. She was on your turkish eye-ways so you couldn't see her. Yeah. So you would introduce her and then she so on and so on. I would say, Ladies and gentlemen, good-da-loo-jo.

And this is to no one. That's right, because I'm the first one there. Greta Lujo. And this is to no one. That's right, because I'm the first one there. Then I would take my place behind my seat at the table. And then Greta would say, and I can't do a voice, but it sounded like this. Ladies and gentlemen, Beatrice Lujo.

And then Beatrice, and my oldest sister Beatrice would come out, Greta goes to take some paper and put a table and a chair. Then Beatrice would say, little brother. The Earl came out, he was our older brother. Now he didn't talk much because he was very shy. And so he would come out, he would just stand there.

And then after like a certain amount of time. How much older is he at the time, by the way? And I guess now. We're all one year apart. One year apart, oh, okay. So he's only three years older than you, but he's shy. He's shy. And so he would just stand there.

And then our next brother, he would know like, give it a pause, give it a beat. You're right, yeah, give him some room to breathe. Yeah, and then he would come out and he would cough his name so it was announced. Right, sort of like that when it's really fun. I don't know if you've seen this recently, but people, if they're talking to someone who they don't like,

they'll kind of cough and say the word, they'll go like, uh, asshole. But they'll pretend it's a cough. Have you ever seen that? It's very- But they do cough and then they say the word asshole? Well, they say the word, let me see if I can get the chronology right.

They say it while they're coughing, I believe. And then they always have plausible deniability. They can be like, I was coughing. But nobody believed that. I did the first few times. The first 100 times. The word asshole doesn't sound like a cough at all.

Let me hear what it sounds like when you cough. Asshole. Did that sound like a cough? Honestly. I said cough. Don't say the word asshole. No. I know we could cut to the chase.

OK. In any case, so we have who's older than Earl? Who is your oldest son? I know we could cut to the chase. In any case, so we have who's older than Earl? Who is your oldest? Leonard. Leonard. And anyone else? Oh, would he introduce the parents or? He'll introduce my mama.

Okay. Who's your mama? Grace Lujo. Okay. And then Grace, it would be her responsibility then. We would all then stand behind our chairs at the table and say, and now the moment you've been waiting for, here he is, direct from working hard all day to put food on the table. You know him as dad. It's Buckley Lujo.

Wow. And then, I mean, what a windup for Buckley Lujo. Wow. And then, I mean, what a windup for Buckley. He would come out, we would clap for him, he would bow. That is not, I mean, especially like back when you were a kid, people were working 80 hours a week at these terrible jobs that- I worked 80 hours a week,

my dad worked 120 hours a week. And you were a five-year-old boy. Yeah. Wow, what a life back then. Oh, I loved it. Everything's so different now. It's so different now. For a toy, we had buttons.

Yeah, fun. There were a lot, you could have so much fun with a button. So many games you could play. You could play checkers. You could play checkers. If you had enough of them. If you have enough of them, they're different colors. And you could play hide the button.

Yeah. You could play find the button. Where were the buttons usually? Wait, hide the button just means you hide them and then that's game over? No, you still have to find them. So that's the next game. So hide and find the button is one game?

Yeah, hide and find. They're two separate games. Oh. Okay, how do you play hide the button? Hide the button is one person hides the button. Everybody else gotta find it. Find the button is the button is hidden. By whom? Everybody must find it. All right. Find the button is the button is hidden. By whom?

Everybody must find it. Meaning just you lost a button. Yeah. Hey where's our button? Hey let's play find the button. Let's make a game. Everything, that's the wonderful thing about being just common folk with not a lot of means. You can find joy in anything. And it just proves that money doesn't buy happiness. You can- This is more formal than the apology one. You never finished the apology. I could use some of that sauce on the apology to be frank. But I mean, nowadays when you see the modern world

with all of its technology and phones and apps- Everybody play connect four. Everyone's on x.com so many hours of the day. Everybody sang Silly Party. Is our lives better for that? Do you remember when they had the game? There was like a little, a little plastic, uh, seat through tank with water in it. And then you press the button, you try to get the hoops on the crab or whatever,

or this claws. I don't remember this. I don't think we had enough money to buy one of these. I thought that was the most innovative thing in toys. Yeah. It was so exciting. Yeah, I was too old to play with it, but I wanted to. Yeah.

I wonder why I didn't hear about that. You used to see so many commercials for toys. Does anybody know what I'm talking about? No. You used to see so many commercials for toys. Does anybody know what I'm talking about? Nope. You used to see so many commercials for toys and now you don't see them anymore. Yeah, I just see commercials for coffins. I see coffins? Yeah.

That's your demo. Oh. It's my demo. You see prescription medication commercials. Yeah, I'm watching the news at 430 a.m. There's a lot of commercials for coffins. But you used to see, like, every show you... And presents for grandchildren.

Every...prisons for grandchildren? Presents. Oh. I thought that was your new platform. No, I would never throw my grandchild on the bridge. How many grandchildren do you have? I have 76 grandchildren. As many as the music man himself had of trombones. Well, he lied though.

Well, it came true. Is it a lie if it eventually comes true? It came true, but it was a lie. He didn't make it come true. Somebody else made that come true. Who else made it come true? The people that paid for the instruments. He didn't do anything.

Yeah, but then he bought the instruments. He didn't do anything. Yeah, but then he bought the instruments. He didn't do anything. He bought the instruments. He took the money. And then bought the instruments. No, he didn't. Yeah, eventually he did. Did he wear that into play?

At the end of the thing, you see everyone with all their trombones. You see everyone with all their trombones. Wait a minute. He sounds like a con man. How do you not know what the sound of music is and you know the music man so well? The music, because the music,

I hear the music man, and I say, I want to know who's is and you know the music man so well. The music, because the music, I hear the music man and I say, I want to know who's this man. Being the music man. But so you, so at the end- Where's the scene where he buys the instruments for the people? They cut over it. Where's the scene where he goes to the bathroom?

You don't see everything that happens to a man in a movie. I think they cut out the bathroom part because it's not Geraint's story. But this, your mind automatically goes to, oh my gosh, this experience changed him so much that he went and got the money. They want your mind to go there. How come when they arrest him, he never says, hey, hey, I bought the instruments. He never says shit. No, because then he does buy the instruments. After he gets arrested? Yeah. So that's the experience that changes him? He does not get arrested.

They're about to arrest him. This is spoilish for the music man, by the way. They put him in handcuffs because he's directing the band with handcuffs on. Not everyone who's put in handcuffs is arrested, dear. Boy, that's a good point. Some people are just kinky. And we don't kink, Sean.

So he's directing the band. Yeah. He's not been arrested yet. They he is, he's directing the band. Yeah. He's not been arrested yet. They put him in, they're about to. He's directing the band and he's, and he's saying, think, think, think, because he's been using the think system. That's right. And someone starts playing, one of the little kids starts playing horribly.

Yeah. And the, the, the. Cause he's a kind of man who didn't teach him anything. And the parents, because it's their little child that they love so much, start crying and saying, it's beautiful. Yeah. And that's my boy. Right.

And every, all the parents are like, what are you talking about? This guy's a con man. He taught all these kids how to play these instruments, which by the way, the instruments were there at the time. You have to admit that. They were there. That's right. which by the way, the instruments were there at the time. You have to admit that.

They were there, that's right. So then it does a slow fade, the slower the better as far as I'm concerned with these fades. If you're directing a movie, turn that shit up to 60 seconds. And then it fades into a big parade where all the kids have the instruments

and he's not arrested. He hasn't served time or anything. That's right. You're agreeing with me. No, I'm not. Where do we differ? I'm letting you play this out. And so the mind is then led to believe like, oh, he wasn't arrested.

If he's in handcuffs and the children show up with the instruments, how did that happen? How did what happen? Why did they put him in handcuffs? Because they were about to arrest him for being a con man, but then... Why wouldn't he say, Hey, before you put those handcuffs on me, I bought all the instruments with the money you gave me? Because he only had a few of the instruments at that point.

The plan was to abscond with the rest of the money. Wouldn't you say, I do have a few of the instruments, the rest are on their way. That's what he did say, but then his, these people from another town. The guy from the train. Yes, from another town that recognized him as a con man, shows up to alert the authorities.

Right. The authorities say, hey, you're a con man. And he says, no, I'm not. And they say, if you're not, then have these kids that you supposedly have been teaching how to play these instruments. Who now have their instruments. Who now, some of them have instruments. Some of them have instruments.

Let them play. And his plan. So the guy from the trade explains to them, here's what he does. He buys a head full of instruments. And then his plan is to abscond with the 90% of the money. And that's what this guy says? That's what this guy says. Look at him right now.

Big it. Bing it. Big it. Look at who right now? What am I supposed to Bing? Don't take Kembe, RIP. Me. No, what?

Sir. What? You didn't know to Kembe? No, tell me that's not true. Did Kembe express on? It's unfortunately very true. He passed away a couple of weeks ago. What you didn't know to Kimbe? No, tell me that's not true It's unfortunately very true he passed away a couple of weeks ago, so so I can't he do it no no no to the great Reaper to the great Reaper In any case I can't believe I'm saying this but I'm right about this he it comes true They never arrest him it ends up coming true. So you can't think of a way to search

for this specific scene in this movie. Look, I didn't have any luck calling Tatiana, but okay, yeah, let's see. Final scene, music. All machines are the same. Okay, here we go. This is the 76 trombones. Here we go.

I have to- That's gonna be an ad before this. That's gonna be the parade. Here we go. He's in handcuffs. Back it up, baby. That's too soon. That's as early as it goes. I don't have the whole movie.

But see, they all have the instruments. Pause that. Yes, sir. This proves nothing. And what you're doing is you're avoiding shooting the part that we're talking about. What are we talking about? We're talking about the... We're talking about the...

We're talking about the... We're talking about the... We're talking about the... We're talking about the... We're talking about the... We're talking about the... We're talking about the... We're talking about the... We're talking about the...'re avoiding shooting the part that we're talking about. What are we talking about?

We're talking about the men. Shut that shit up. I'm not avoiding shit. This is the clip that came up. Do you want me to rent the movie? Yeah. And then fast forward to it. Should I go home?

I'm sorry. This is our next guest. We're in the middle of an argument, ma'am. So I'm saying if you want to get into it, I'm fine to go home. No, no, no. I just want you to say I'm right. It sounds like maybe renting the movie sounds like it would be a good time. Do you want to watch it together tonight? I love that movie. I'll watch it anytime.

Then why do you not know the plot of it? If you love it so much. I'm saying that I do know the plot of it, and I'm saying you're wrong. What am I wrong about? You've never said that. You've said, oh, they don't have the instruments. I just proved they have the instruments. You said, I never said they don't have the instruments. Oh, you never said that. I say, why do they have the instruments? That's what I said. And did you answer that or was it purely just a hypothetical you were throwing out? No. If I was asking the question, why would I have the answer for it? Because some people ask questions they know the answers to, honey. That's called lawyers. We're not in court, baby doll. And I'm telling you right now, you are. You know you're wrong.

I know why they have the instruments. It's because- He buys a few. He buys a few, right as they were about to doubt him, the Wells Fargo wagon comes. The guy from the train shows up and says, here's what he does, he buys a few instruments and then he runs away with the rest of the money. That's the fucking scene that you ordered a Google

because you're a coward. I said that they do that. I'm agreeing with you that they do that. No, I'm saying they don't do that. He says it off camera, much like Constable Johnsebal was shot, but we are led to believe, because we, the audience already know this information.

He was shot on camera, he died off camera. We, correct. The audience already know the information, so we don't wanna hear it again. Which information? The information that his plan is to abscond with the rest of the money. When is it established that he buys a handful of instruments? Where do you think the instruments come from? If they don't, if he didn't buy them? They come from nowhere is my point. What?

They just show, they come from what, their divine intervention? My point is, it's shoddy. My point is not that there's magic in the world where an angel delivers insurance. You're saying it's a plot hole. That's all I've ever been saying. It's not a plot hole. It's just you don't need to be spoon fed this information because we understand it. I think if you're watching a movie about a con man who makes kids play pretend instruments

and takes their money for weeks and weeks and then all of a sudden some instruments show up which the guy has made a play and his whole thing is he's never going to buy these instruments. No. Right as they start to doubt him and go, hey, I think this guy might be a con man, the well, he's thought so far ahead, the Wells Fargo wagon comes and delivers some, and they're like, oh, see, he's not a con man.

It buys him a little time for him to get more of the money out of them. That's horseshit. You know it. I know it. You know it. I know it. You know it. I don't know it. You good luck sleeping tonight.

We list on your conscience. You know what, I rescind my formal apology. I didn't even get to talk about how we're gonna have a trick or treat party at this small town. I can get out of here. No, I'm sorry Hannah, I want you to stay. Maybe I should leave. Maybe, but we do have to take a break.

We'll see, and maybe Christian should leave too. Okay. Still haven't gotten a call from Tad. We're gonna take a break, and all of you listening can go watch the Music Man. Go watch the Music Man. And we'll put up a poll and I'm telling you, 99% of the people are gonna side with me on this.

99%? Yeah, that's a lot, right? Do you think Comedy Bang Bang fans are huge musical theater people? I'd like to think so. We have Andrew Lloyd Webber on this show. Have you ever heard of him? I'm not sure if I've heard of him.

Who? He's the guy who wrote that musical that Nicole Scherzinger is in with all the blood running to her face. All right, we had to take a break. We'll be right back with more Comedy Bang Bang after this. Comedy Bang Bang, we're back. We have Christian Bruhn here from The Something. Just look up The in Netflix. It'll come up. Scott the recruit.

The recruit, Q1. We also have Bing Lujo who during the break admitted he was wrong and I apologize. That's not true. That's not true. Hey man, yes, I am. You're gonna turn this Lujo into a Cujo. Oh.

Is that, by the way, I've been looking up your Yelp reviews and there are so many that say, I turned this Lujo into a Cujo. Is that like a thing that you say to your customers all the time? It is, yeah. And it's a thread of like, are people misbehaving in the store a lot?

A lot of kids misbehave in the store, yeah. They come in there and they try to dump bots on each other. It has to go hand in hand with a business aimed primarily at children, which you would agree that your business is. For children of all ages. But kids, like as an adult, you can't take that much sugar. Well, you're not every day, but you know. That's the thing, but you want everyday customers, don't you? Do you not? I want customers every day, but I don't necessarily want everyday customers.

But like a Starbucks. This is one kid comes in, wears a leather jacket, he keeps banging on the jukebox thinking he can I want customers every day, but I don't necessarily want everyday customers. But like a Starbucks. This one kid comes in, wears a leather jacket, he keeps banging on the jukebox thinking he can make it turn on. Does it ever? No. That's not how jukebox works. You should get like a remote control for it.

He left a bunch of fist grease on this one area. Was he eating fried chicken right before? Yeah. He gets a belly full of fried chicken and then he says, now I gotta work on that jukebox. You really shouldn't have opened your place next to the fried chicken emporium. They opened after me.

Did they? Yes. Oh man, what's that place called again? It's called Fried Chicken right next to the mall shop. Very descriptive names. It is. But everybody, I thought it was kind of a clever name. Everybody knows where it is.

Sure. Because you're the biggest and only mall shop. The biggest and only mall shop. Yeah. Everybody loves a malt. Is there a Shake Shop? Where are you? Cause I would love to come check it out.

We're on the street. Okay. So come on by. Yeah. They're not on the sidewalk or anything. No. Right there on the street. We got maltes, we got shake, and we also got for weirdos, egg creams.

Yeah, man, I had an egg cream once in New York City. It's disgusting. They're so gross. I went all the way out there thinking like, oh man, because I'd read about them in a book about this guy who moves back to his hometown of New York and all he can think about is having the perfect egg cream and he finally moves back to New York City and he has one.

So I read this book. At 12 years old, I go go into a place I order an egg cream. It's the most disgusting thing I've ever had in my life. What was that stupid book? It was called The Old Neighborhood. Thumbs down! Thumbs down to that. Oh great book though. Made me uh really anticipate this egg cream though. I'll never forgive it for that. Let me guess this guy moved away from New York and he's like New York where's the best? Why did I ever leave? Yeah, I feel like it was one of those pre-Liar, Liar movies about like a guy who's not- Can you imagine the world? Pre-Liar, Liar?

Where he's not in touch with his like, what made him love, you know, he has a son himself and he's too busy or whatever. He moves back to the old neighborhood and gets... But he turns Cas in the cradle into a movie? Yeah. And then he gets back in touch with this egg cream loving. So I've never forgiven... That's what it's all about. I've never forgiven the book.

And I go around forgiving books a lot. I've never forgiven that one. I wouldn't forgive that book. If that book begged me, I wouldn't forgive it. That book came to me on its knees. I love now most books at the end in a postscript they have I beg of you, please forgive this book. If you didn't like this book. Yeah, it's like Shakespeare. If we spirits have offended think but this and all is mentioned terrible apologies That we have butt slumbered here Maybe your ass fell asleep watching this stupid fucking show.

They start saying, if we have offended, they know what they did. It's like, guys, that's not a real apology. No. If I happen to do something that you took the wrong way, get the fuck out of here. Fuck. It should be, we spirits are humans

and we're learning and growing every day. That's right. Thank you for the feedback. I will try to do better. Thank you. I like you. I like you. What did you the feedback. I will try to do better. Thank you. I like you. I like you. What'd you say, we're friends?

I think we're friends. I like you. No, we're, I mean, we're definitely work colleagues. For now. Sure, but I think something might come out of this. I really do. A bro-bance? Yeah, maybe a musical theater podcast.

Do you agree, bros before hoes? Of course I do. That's all I wanted to know. I agree too. All right, we got to get on to our next guest. Perfect introduction. Should I get out of here? No, no, you're good.

You're good. Welcome to C-Block, where everything gets loose. Wow. Okay. I'm sorry, and I'm just going to be so quiet, and you introduce me, and I'm not going to everything gets loose. Wow, okay. I'm sorry, and I'm just gonna be so quiet, and you introduce me and I'm not gonna say a word. Okay, great. They're a fire safety officer.

Please welcome Hannah Byrne. Hello, Scott Ackerman. Guess how are we? Guess how are we? I said guests. Oh, guests, yes. I thought you wanted me to guess how I was. Oh, I'll take it.

What a fresh face shift for a young person. Oh, hey, well, thank you for saying that. I appreciate that. Do you like egg creams? Huh? Do you like egg creams? Fun fact, my dad got an egg cream at the Santa Monica Pier Carousel one time. Really? She had them down there? And that's a fact?

He's from Queens and he said, I wanna try one and he tried it and took one sip and that was it. Yeah. I feel like I should go back to it and maybe try it again with a more cultivated palette. Nope. Nope, still disgusting. Have you tried one three years ago?

I'm gonna go ahead and say, you don't have to do that. Yeah, it's just, you expect them to be sweeter, but it's so much of just like soda water. How much egg is going? Is it a beaten egg? No, no egg. Is it raw? No egg, carbonated. Wait, what the fuck? It is carbonated.

It's carbonated water and chocolate syrup. It's a lie. There's no egg in an egg cream? No egg. Carbonated. Wait, what the fuck? It is carbonated. It's carbonated water and chocolate syrup. It's a lie. There's no egg in an egg cream? No. There's no cream in an egg cream. No cream in an egg cream. Imagine the bulls on the guy who named this.

Seriously. The what? The bulls. The bulls. On this guy. The bulls. Hungarian. He has bulls on him?

It's so wonderful to meet you, Hannah. You're a fire safety officer. Yes, and right now I'm on a big tour doing public outreach on fire safety. Okay. Now, are you pro or confire? Pro or confire? Yeah. I think fire is its own beast.

I'm just here to protect people. Okay. So you think the invention of fire, which a lot of people say happened when God basically kicked Adam and Eve out of the kingdom of Eden. Sure. The garden of Eden basically he was like, he was like, uh, okay. A lot of people think the apple is code for sex.

Like, Hey, don't have sex while you're here. And then a lot of people think that a lot of people. Yeah. 99% of the people think that. Well, let's put a poll up on that. If we can put a poll up on. She's upstairs. Big bang. She's upstairs, no. Comedy big bang.

But, and then they say, okay, well, what happened was they kick you out of Eden, but here's your consolation prize. Thunder, lightning, whoopsh, fire. Man, to get kicked out of Branson, Missouri like that, can you believe it? Straight out of the Garden of Eden. Yeah. Just a shame.

I thought that was knowledge of good and evil. That's what they say, but when you're talking about good and evil, you're talking about the old in and out. Sex is knowledge? Urge, not burger. But then the Bible also talks about sex, so why would they in this one part be euphemistic? That's the thing, anytime you're in church

and they're like, the Bible's actually a very, it talks about sex, the Song of Solomon is a very sexy book. No, it's not. See, I love this. Fire safety gets a discourse going, and that's what I appreciate most about it. Yes, thank you. Do you believe that Prometheus actually stole fire from the gods?

Yes. Do I believe that Prometheus actually stole fire from the gods? Yeah. Here's how I like to, here's my relationship to fire. I don't like putting value judgments on fire or people who interact with fire. So it's neither good nor bad. My role is to give tips and rules about being safe if you choose to interact with fire. You dodged my question. What was your question?

You repeated it back to us. Do you believe that Prometheus stole fire from the gods to give to humanity? Again, I'm not putting a value judgment on fire or Prometheus' motives. That's not what I'm asking you to do. Well, because I'm saying you say stole and stole seems to sort of inherently give some sort of a value on what he was doing. The fire belongs to the gods. Why did they wanna keep it?

I'm just saying, can fire really belong to anybody is my question. I think if it belongs to anybody, gods. Sure, which one? All of them, they all had the access to fire. But it's sort of like the song Happy Birthday. You got Patty and Mildred thinking they own it. No, it belongs to everyone.

If I'm being totally honest, the San Diego Fire Department hasn't given an official line on this. And so I'm not totally sure how to proceed. I think they need to put it on the website. Yeah. And so maybe you can at San Diego Fire Department, fire can be fun. And you can just go ahead and let them know that. And we could definitely put that in our top of the list.

Is the whole handle fire can be fun? Is that fire can be fun? It's at San Diego Fire Department, fire can be fun, but spelled in a little bit of a different way than you think it would be. So this FY, like the Fire Fest? Yes. Why are they promoting fun fire if they're the San Diego Fire Department? Fire, like the Fire Fest. F-Y-R-E. Fire can be fun. Billy, what's his name? Billy with a fire fist? We put a lot of money into the new fire festival that's gonna be happening. Really? Yes, the San Diego Fire Festival. Who's performing this year? This one's gonna be great.

I think it's gonna be great. I think so. How's it feel to have three men all just hammering you with questions? I love it. See, I spend most of my time in a fire department building. And so that's a lot more men. You all are so much smaller than all of the firefighters that I'm normally around.

So this has been really great. Do you mean in width, depth, or? And sort of, yeah, you know, like all around, I'd say an all around, an all around smaller circumference in mind and body of things like that. I'm taller than I look, I'm just bent over. Can you stand up?

Ugh. Wow. Do you think we could sell calendars of- It was like you stretched up rather than stood up. That was incredible. Let's figure the elongated man, Ralph Dibney himself. Do you think we could sell calendars of the three like you stretched up rather than stood up. That was incredible. Just figure the elongated man, Ralph Dibney himself. Do you think we can sell calendars of the three of us with our shirts on? I think you could.

I don't think people will buy them. Hey, I'll take it though. Okay, so hey, that's something. And there's something for everybody. Again, my job is not to put value judgments on anything. I'm just presenting information. That's your job description. I am, I'm just here to, hey, we're just doing a tour.

We're letting people know about fire safety. It's so important. Let us know about fire safety. There has to be, I mean, I've just here to, hey, we're just doing a tour. We're letting people know about fire safety. It's so important. Let us know about fire safety. There has to be, I mean, I've been around fire, gosh, it seems like all my life there's been one somewhere around. Hey, congratulations. So I feel like I know it all,

but there has to be something I don't know, right? Well, first and foremost, I think one of the most important things is you have to make sure that you have fire detectors anywhere. So I'm looking around this room. Fire detectors. I'm seeing we have one fire detector over here.

So that's good. Is that different from the smoke alarm? It's different from the smoke alarm. The fire detector? Yeah. There's usually a smoke alarm built into the fire detector. That's a true fact. That's usually what helps it detect the fire, am I right?

Is the smoke detector? Is the- What am I calling it? Am I seeing a fire detector? You are. This is a new thing that the San Diego Fire Department is putting out. They're trying to rebrand it. Oh, wow.

Where it's one of those things where like, that's the smokes department, the smoke fighting department sort of deals in that, and we're the firefighting department. Well, people say- Call us when there's a fire. We don't want it when there's smoke, there's fire, there is, but sometimes it's like, when there's lightning, there's not always thunder.

You know what I'm saying? Thunder always happens when it's raining, though. When it's raining. Is that true? Yeah. Okay, I'm gonna look at that. Players only love you when they're playing. We're gonna beg Matt later and we'll sort of figure out if that is true or not. So yeah, you have a fire detector.

I'm assuming that there is a smoke department will come in and sort of talk about their back end on that. We'll get someone different for that. How do you get along with the smoke department? Do you guys work together or is it like the FBI, the cops? Can I be honest? So pedantic. They're so pedantic. They're gonna get along great with you guys. Were they excited when the show Lost came around?

There was the smoke monster. They're like, we're back at business, baby! Yes, that movie, The Happening, did you see that? Oh, I did not. They loved that one. It was also Stephen King. The one where the trees were fighting humans. Oh yeah, and I'm actually remembering now

that I'm talking about. Oh, that's Lord of the Rings. So I'm saying, you know that movie, Stephen King wrote that and he also wrote The Mist, which is the movie I'm talking about. The Mist. And The Happ know that movie, Stephen King wrote that and he also wrote The Mist, which is the movie I'm talking about. The Mist. And the happening of course was in Shetland. Which is different.

The Mist though. Did you see The Visit? I did not. I saw The Visit. Well, I'm here to visit to talk about. Love it. What was that recent one where they have a concert to trap a killer?

The trap. The trap. And that question feels like a trap because I'm trying to move on to my next point. I love it. So here we go. We're not old. Old. You are, but not so much.

So don't worry about it. Thank you so much. You, on the other hand. I'm old. Turning to dust in front of me. I can be on that beach. Oh, that's fun. I was saying the reverse beach.

So make sure you got smoke detectors. So that's a fire safety point. We're like, we stood on water and we went out to sand. Yeah. to be on that beach. Oh, that's fun. I was gonna say the reverse beach. So make sure you got smoke detectors. So that's a fire safety point. Where like we stood on water and we went out to sand. Yeah, reverse beach. Yeah, reverse beach. I love that.

Write that down. You shouldn't be saying this on these podcasts. That's a tip for free from the San Diego Fire Department from us to you. So give us some more tips. Okay, so yeah, first one, check your smoke detectors. That's a fire safety tip. Check them.

I thought that they were supposed to alert us to trouble. No, so okay, so here's what you should be doing every two weeks. This is true. You should be checking your fire detectors slash I guess smoke detectors if you want to get like in the weeds about it. How do we do that every two weeks? It seems like that's a lot. Do we do we maybe add a day every two weeks? Well, that's

just the calendar or something. That's a guideline. Honestly,. Honestly what I do personally is I check them like two, three, four times a day. And for me how I do that is like I remember like oh make sure you're eating a meal because you know like sometimes stuff is going on in life and you just got to have a reminder and so I'm like oh make sure that as I'm checking the smoke detector I'm remembering to like eat and brush my teeth and it gives me something to wake up for it. And so that's kind of nice, right? That's a fire safety tip.

Interesting. Eat and brush your teeth. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just make sure I'm sort of like- So you look so forward to brushing your teeth that gives you something to wake up for. I wouldn't say I'm looking forward to it. I'm saying I've sort of been living in a bit of a malaise and that sort of reminds me that, you know, honestly, I'm here about fire safety.

I don't want to get into my personal life. So that's fire safety. We could though. I mean, we have time in the segment. Well, you know what? Hey, you know, honestly, I'm here about fire safety. I don't want to get into my personal life. So that's fire safety. We have time in the segment. Well, you know what? Hey, you know what? Let me get through my fire safety tips. And if it comes up, it comes up. If it doesn't, you know, and it won't

because I'm a professional. That's why they sent me out here. How often do you make that noise? Huh? I've never made that noise in my life. You just made it. You just made it. I just heard you do it.

I remember telling you. Point number three. Check for fire hazards. Okay, that's really important. So we're just looking around. So like, you know, I think like a lot of Americans, I'm in the process of moving. I had a, okay, well, ah, ah, ah.

Oh, you just made that noise again. Be careful. It sounds like you're choking on your teeth. So here's the thing. I'm like a lot of Americans, I'm going through sort of a life change. So like I'm moving, we got boxes everywhere. I'm sort of like splitting apart my life from my,

you know, whatever. And so, you know, like her stuff is in some boxes and she hasn't come pick them up yet. So there's a, this is a breakup. Huh? This is a breakup of a relationship. I don't want to talk about me personally. Oh, sorry.

So it's just sort of like- You're going through some changes where you're moving- Like most Americans, there's boxes everywhere and sort of like, we're rolling up posters of like events that we'd put on together. And so it's like, you know, the- You would put on events together? Those kind of things would be, huh?

What happened? When she's a firefighter and it's fine and we just like, we don't wanna talk about it, she moved over to the smoke department and our lives sort of changed for the worse. What kind of events would you put on? Hmm? Well, like fire safety events like this, you know?

Anyways, I do not wanna talk about me personally. Is this an event? That's sort of like, I'm putting up a, like fire safety events like this, you know? I do not want to talk about my personal life. Is this an event? That's sort of like, I'm putting up a boundary. So you used to be like a team? Yeah, so it's like, you know, like smoke and fire. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. That was us. She was smoke, I was fire.

She was a firefighter turned smoke advocate awareness officer. Can I ask you, your last name is Byrne. Why weren't you like, and it's B-Y-R-N-E. Why weren't you like Byrne and like Byrne Cream? Okay, I'm hearing the note and I'm going to take the note. Thank you, Scott. I appreciate that. I feel like you're asking your own question.

Where is Cream supposed to have come from? Where would Cream have come from? Byrne and Butter. Her last name was Carpaccio. Oh, like the little fresh meat. Her last name was Carpaccio. Oh. Like the little... The fresh meat. Fresh meat that you would tablescape with?

It's spelled so different, Scott. Oh, like, let me guess. C-A-R-P-A-C-C-I-O? That's exactly it. Okay, interesting. Yeah, so you've heard of us. I haven't, no, I confess, but I'm not out there in those streets, you know, like looking for this kind of thing. So anyways, you know, that's sort of like what's, you know, so like've heard of us. I haven't, no, I confess, but I'm not out there in those streets,

like looking for this kind of thing. So anyways, that's sort of like what's, like a lot of Americans, I'm going through a life change. What was the issue between you? I don't wanna talk about it. She went over to smoke department. Again, I'm sort of like, I am putting up a boundary there. I am here to talk about my job.

But a lot like fire, fire doesn't respect boundaries. A lot of times. Boy, that's true. Yeah, so you know what, again, I'm not putting value judgment on fire. That's sort of giving a big motives to fire. So you shouldn know, again, I'm not putting value judgment on fire. That's sort of giving me a big motive to fire. So, you shouldn't put a value judgment on me for not respecting your boundaries. So, you're sort of calling yourself fire in this situation. Sure.

But, was that your role in the fire? The desire for information about the breakup is spreading. Number four. Look for people at risk. Okay. Right? So, you can sort of like look at your surroundings. Like, if I was in this room, I would be looking at all of you frail old

weak men and I would go, okay, how do I get you guys out of this situation safely? Should a situation arise? You want to be prepared for it? Yeah. You want to know who you can fireman style throw over your shoulder? And who I have to leave behind type situations. So I'm evaluating the risk. Yeah.

What if I am a frail old man? I'm sorry? What if I am a frail old man? I'm sorry? What if I am a frail old man? What if you are a frail man? Yeah, frail old man. So I'm looking at you and I don't think you have to say what if, I can see that that is the situation. I'm saying what do I do?

Oh, what do you do? No, I think what Hannah is trying to say is that you'd be at the bottom of the list of people that Hannah, right, you would not save him. Well first off I would say correct, you're right, and good knowing yourself, I think that's wonderful. So that won't be true, as Shakespeare says. In a situation that I could, I would alert

the proper authorities, but in a situation like, I'm at home, I'm by myself like most Americans, and I sort of am looking in the mirror, and I'm like, oh, that's a person at risk'm at home, I'm by myself like most Americans and I sort of am looking in the mirror and I'm like, oh that's a person at risk, you know what I'm saying? Because it's a breakup. I don't want to talk about the breakup. Does that make you more flammable? Is that what you're saying? I'm just sort of saying that like emotionally. Emotionally, yeah. And so it's sort of like you know I think you're in a bad place right now. Huh? You're in a bad place. I would say I'm I'm doing my job and I'm doing what I can. You know what I love about what you do is you have a big smile

on your face and you are being very professional. Thank you. But that said, you can drop the act if you need to. I mean, we're all human beings here. I mean, this is the least professional environment. We've all had breakups. We've all had breakups. I mean, some of us more than the others.

You must've had so many. You've lived such a long life. I've had three breakups. Is that true? That's it. That's actually a lot. I've been with my wife for 75 years. Wow, and you just broke up, you were telling me?

No, she died a few days ago. Oh, that's right. Oh, Jesus. I'm so sorry, fire related? No, but she wants cream in it. Okay, well, hey, again, fire, we don't put value judgments on fire. We don't put value judgments on fire.

I'm sorry to hear that. And also what a beautiful ending. Fire is good because you can make a hamburger or you can burn up your wife. We have that on a poster at the station. Incredible. Did you and your former partner create that together? You know, we created a bunch of logos.

Scott, you're married, right? I am, yeah. How's that going? It's going well, yeah. I think so, I mean, you'd have to ask her. Okay, did she sort of promise to love you forever? Yeah, I think that was in the vows. And she's sort of like holding onto that promise?

Yeah, I mean, I think we're both kind of like, we've done 85% of the vows at this point. Cool, 80% of the vows, what do you mean by that? 80, 85, somewhere in there. Standard vows or specialty vows, customized? We wrote our own and then I think we also did some of the standard issue like check mark. Give us a taste.

Give us a little taste. Come on, give us a little taste. You can't just throw that out there and then not give us a little taste. There's the old like, I promise when you're old and disgusting that- You said that? Yeah.

And she's still hanging? Yeah. She knows she's gonna get old and disgusting. Right. I'll get there hanging? Yeah. Okay. She knows she's gonna get old and disgusting. Right. I'll get there first. Whoa.

Like when, I know when you're old and disgusting, I'll already be old and disgusting. So that'll be cool. That's the beauty of marriage. That's amazing. You know? That's amazing. Some good stuff. But you're saying that your partner did not keep her vows?

Well, you know, we sort of said like, hey, we're in this, we're in this for the long haul where there is smoke, there is fire and I love you was sort of what we used to say. So you were married. You were married. We were married. Yes. We were married for four beautiful years. Sort of a high school. And then she sort of said, I graduated. Sort of a high school. Sort of like a high school amount of time. Oh, I see. Yeah. Yeah. I like to divide times in terms of high schools. So I've been alive for seven and a quarter high schools at this point.

Congratulations, Super Seeker. Good for you. I love that. So, okay, next point, evaluate and act. Okay. What do you think caused the final rift? She evaluated the situation and she acted in getting out of it. Was counseling ever part of it?

Was counseling ever part of it? Was it counts and a part of it? Counseling I believe is what it was. Was counseling ever a part of it? Thank you. Yeah. I find it weird that we understand you now. We've just been hanging out so long.

We're bros now. I was just talking English. This is really helpful. I'm sorry. I came here to give you guys advice and I feel long, we're bros now. I was just talking English. This is really helpful. I'm sorry, I came here to give you guys advice and I feel like you're giving me advice now. Well, we could. Advice for advice? Yeah, we're all adults and you're talking to us about, hey, check your smoke detector. And it's like take a penny, leave a penny.

I love that. That's really beautiful. A lot of these can be used in a relationship. If you're checking on your fire that you're your little thing every three times a day you can check in on your partner and see how they're doing okay that's really beautiful the beep beep beep is is like hey you're neglecting me can i be honest um as you guys have probably can tell by my outfit i'm kind of like i'm kind of a rock star in this community yeah i mean fire safety community you're writing sort of of like, what are those suits

that Elvis used to wear? Jump. Jump. Yes, that was it. I'm wearing a jump suit with a bedazzled. The bedazzled is what I was talking about. SDFD on the back, yeah. The flames are a neat touch as well.

It's winged, as you can see. Yeah, very nice. So yeah, and I think we grew really fast and I was sort of like the front man of the duo and she was just really into the work. Could you raise the visor on your helmet because I can't see. Of course, of course. Yeah. I'd like to be able to see your eyes. Evil can evil style. It's very patriotic though, a lot of red, white and blue. Thank you. I appreciate that. Sort of like our manager said that that was the selling point,

that was the community that we were talking to and that's sort of what was going to sell. And she was really all about the work and she was like, we just got to stick to the work. And I was like- Your manager? Yeah. At the fire department? Yeah we're rep by 360. It was just one of those things. So you're rep by management 360? Yeah we're rep'd in a big community. I want to talk about them of like what's great about them is you'll end up exactly where you started. Oh you're talking. So for us in the fire world, management 360 means that sort of tower

that you sit on top of where it's all made of glass. So you can sort of look in a 360 degree angle on the fire trucks. Yeah, so we're wrapped by that guy. His name is Alan. What is, what are the dogs all about? The Dalmatians. The Dalmatians.

What's their purpose? Show sport. It's sort's their purpose? Show sport. Show and sport. Show and sport. Sort of like how the city of Irvine just bought that cyber truck. It's all just for show. Did they actually? They did.

For what? Turned it into a police car. Police car. Spent another 150 grand turning it into a police car. Fun fact, the city of West Vancouver has a bug police car. That's gorgeous. That's adorable. It's adorable in a way that is unsettling that that's where my knees going.

I think you can only arrest children with that. Yeah. I wouldn't mind being arrested by that. I'd be like, oh, it's so cute. How do you do a backseat divider? Are there four doors on a bug? No, two doors. No, two doors.

I think it could be a four. You gotta put the seats forward. So yeah, the officer has to literally put the seat forward to get somebody in the backseat. That's why they gotta be kids. Yeah. Anyways, our management company really sort of had some big ideas and I, not gonna lie to you, I got seduced by big fire and my wife sort of was really into the work and making sure that we were staying true to our roots and that we would sort of go bullet point by bullet point. And I said,

why can't it be sexy? You know what I mean? Yeah, you were trying to add a little riz. Yeah. I was trying to, you know, I really think of myself as a performer first and foremost, you know what I mean? And I wanted to give the people what they wanted. And she said, safety is what people need. So you were trying to rock star to, how would you give it a little more extra glitz and- Cocaine, and we did a lot of cocaine

during that time period. Like Stephen King? Yeah. Wow. Yeah, with Stephen King sometimes. Wow. Wow. Place to place, yeah. So, okay, that was a fun noise. That's how we got the Tommyknockers. Do you think?

Do you think that? Having read it, yes. Before you read it, you were a hard no, I remember. Record, plan, and train. Record what? Record, plan, and train. Record, plan, and train? Yeah.

Are you saying record planes, trains, and automobiles? Record yourself on a plane, train, and automobile? Yeah. Are you saying record, planes, trains, and automobiles? Record yourself in a plane, train, and automobile, recording yourself planning and training. What does record, plan, and train mean? Record, plan, and train means, I don't know what the record part means, but plan and train means that you should be planning your exit strategy.

Why don't you know? And you should be training. I'm sorry. Why don't you? Because that was the part, sorry. I'm not gonna cry, sorry. That was the part that my wife used to do. That was sort of something, sorry. Why? Because that was the part, sorry. I'm not gonna cry, sorry. That was the part that my wife used to do. That was sort of something, sorry, am I X?

Maybe it's smoke related as opposed to fire related. So that was something that was sort of her part. Maybe it was record? We would double team that one, no it was record. It was definitely record. I'll save your record. Get on planes. And if I'm honest, during that part in the presentation,

I just have this vivid memory of I would look over and I would look at her face and it would be that part in the movie where everything would just kind of go silent and a song would play over it and I would just watch her mouth and it would zoom in on her mouth and I just thought she was the most beautiful person

in the world. And yet it all fell apart. What's the Christian, what's the- That was kind of a low blow. No, no, no, I'm just saying, you know, like maybe it wasn't reciprocated. Thank you, Christian. I appreciate, no, I appreciate you grabbing me.

To an earlier part, I am now in a lot of therapy and I'm sort of learning what my part in this situation was and I am taking accountability and I'm moving on. Was it my fault? You were looking at the mouth too much. You think that that was the problem was that I was looking at your mouth too much. Of everything I've said, you think that that was the issue? I agree. My therapist actually didn't even bring up that part

so I'm happy you're here. I'm just hatcheting a guess. Hannah's having a breakthrough right now. No, because right now I'm looking and it's zooming in on your mouth and I'm like, it's so beautiful. And you're single right now and I'm single right now. True, but I mean, I'm still mourning, I guess.

And also don't look at my mouth. I have that used. I have, I went out of my toothpaste. Topol the Smoker's Toothpolish. What is your name sir? Big Lujo. Oh, Big Lujo. If you ever need to come up with a fire safety plan.

Bing. Bing. You know those famous search engines? Bing? Google? Scott's favorite search engine. Right, Yahoo. Bing.

Dogpile. Bing, you know if you ever want to come up with a safety plan, I can help you out. Well, I'm worried that your safety plan kind of leaves me falling through the cracks because I am an old frail man. I can't get around so good. And it seemed like in your plan, if you saw me, the idea is to write me off as a loss. That's not true. I would help you escape in a fireman hold unless they didn't have time or didn't want to.

Will you pick me up and throw me over your shoulder? As long as I had time. Like a continental soldier? I said will you pick me up and throw me over your shoulder? Like a continental soldier. Do your ears hang low? You've heard that song. No, bingsers are tied in a knot and a bow

straight above his head. I can see it. It comes back to me now. You say you would put me, you give me a firema hold if what? If I had the time and I wanted to. Why would you not want to? I'm nice. Well, I'm just saying it sort of depends on what's happening in the situation.

Like what? What would prevent you from taking me out of a fire? It's all about risk assessment. Risk assessment. If there's children in the room, if there's pets in the room, if there's somebody with a higher likelihood of survival in the room. But isn't it better to let the kids die in the fire because they don't know what they're missing? They haven't achieved anything yet.

I hear you and I understand. Plan and train. This is a really important piece of it because you need to come up with a safety plan. We'll record, but again, I don't know what that is because I wasn't paying attention during that part. If you think about it, the children are closer to not being alive than me because I've been alive longer. Well, they're probably like five years out

from not existing. They're closer to not existing at all. And you're what? When do you think you're gonna be? Oh my God, I probably got like another two years left. So no, you're closer than they are. So that would mean that you're closer, yeah. A year and a half.

But I mean, I've been in existence for a long time. Sure, but you're closer to not existing. I'm closer to dying for sure, but not closer to not existing. But you won't exist once you die, do you? So your sort of point is that you're gonna like exist in people's memories, and so like people will remember you for longer.

More people have met you, so it sort of exists to more people. More people have met me, so it sort of exists two more people. How many people have you met? More people. 50 to a hundred million. 50 to a hundred million people. So 50 million to a hundred million. Or just 50 to a hundred million.

50 people to a hundred million people. I see, I understand, plan. Plan. Coming up with a good safety plan for ourselves. Like in this room, I would sort of say single file, we step up and leave. For me, when my marriage- There appears to be two egresses, perhaps three. Huh? What is an egress?

It's a big bird. A big bird. Look out. Right. I see. And I understand. It's BT Barnum used to say this way, he's had a great egress. Did you know him? I see and I understand. It's BT Barnum used to say, this way to the great aircraft. Did you know him?

I met him when I was a baby. My parents took me to the circus. Your parents took you to the circus? He would meet everyone at the circus? Yeah, he'd do a meet and greet after the circus. Go around cheeky everyone's hand? Yeah. Sign photos?

Yeah, he gave me a jawbreaker, but I didn't have teeth. The greatest showman. The greatest. They don't have that in the movie where it just goes around just shaking everyone's hand. Handing toddlers, jawbreakers. They probably, you know, cause they don't want to spoon feed it to you. Yeah.

Right. They just give them that part in the audience. You're just supposed to be. He promised to have them after the circus. So plan. I would say that we would be leaving in a single file line personally. Okay. Size order, size order,

all of the dollars. Here's where I differ with you on that. Okay. I think we're four in a row. Sure. Four wide, four people wide. You think we would be four wide, why would you think that that was a good idea?

Cause we all wanna get out at the same time. I see, so sort of make a rash rush to the door. Yeah, and we all arrive at the same time and we all burst through. If we're four across, we're still single file. Yeah, that's a good point. Just single file on the wrong plane of existence. That's sort of how I'm feeling a lot these days.

What about diagonally? You know what, diagonally? Connect four. Connect four. Pretty sneaky, Kish. Yeah. Yeah, diagonally. You are making less sense the longer I'm listening to you talk.

Unfortunately, he's making more sense to me because I know these commercials. Okay, so this is wonderful. Sometimes when stuff that doesn't make sense is making sense, it's a sign of a stroke. Could be a fire stroke, could be a heat stroke. You should call the ambulance and a doctor immediately. So two calls. Me calling ambulance and doctor, you calling the ward. Exactly. Is heat stroke and sun stroke the same thing? No.

I know about heat stroke and unfortunately, she knew about it. Smokey. What was her name? Her name was Smokey. Smokey Carpaccio was her name. We got to get Smokey Carpaccio. I'm so hungry all of a sudden. She won't come on if I've been here.

I've been calling and calling and calling and she's been sort of staking out the places that I've been going so she can not go there. Can I trick her into it maybe? Yeah. Do you want to try calling her? I'm going to all of a sudden. She won't come on if I've been here. I've been calling and calling and calling and she's been sort of staking out the places that I've been going so she can knock on there.

Can I trick her into it maybe? Yeah, do you wanna try calling her right now? Yeah, let me try to call her, let's see. Do you have her number? She was booked on the show today initially. Yeah, she was booked. Yeah, I wondered why both tat canceled and then smoky carpaccio also canceled.

Let me see. She was the most beautiful woman in the world. What happened to her? Round eyes. What happened to her? Why is she not beautiful anymore? Perfectly round. No, she's still beautiful.

I mean, I haven't seen her. Oh, she goes by a different name now? Stage name. I think I've heard of- Who's Rich Vasalis? Rich Vasalis. Rich Vasalis is the stage name and just started going on the road,

going on the road, trying to sort of like do a one man, sort of like I'm doing right now. I'm trying in place to place. You think you're doing a one man? Okay. Yeah. This is sort of like do a one man, sort of like I'm doing right now. I'm trying in place to place. You think you're doing a one man? Okay. Yeah. This is sort of like, I'm working on some jokes, I'm throwing jokes in between. I haven't got there yet. Oh, great.

Oh yeah, let's hear some. Oh, I, no, you don't wanna hear that. Do it. It's a fire, it's a fire. You gotta train, right? You gotta train. Chug, chug, chug, chug, chug, chug. Knock, knock.

Who's there? Fire. Fire who? Let me ask you, fire who? I do a lot of crowd work, it's sort of my big thing. So I go, okay, so hey, hello sir, where are you from? Me? Yeah. I'm from town.

You're from town, which town, sir? What, come on, you got an ass? Really? Yeah. I'm from town. You're from town? Which town, sir? What? Come on, you got an ass? Huh? He's from the town that has Bing Lu Joe's malt shop. Oh, I see. Oh, Bing Lu Joe's malt shop.

Hope that doesn't catch on fire. Hopefully you've checked your smoke detectors at least once in the last two weeks. Oh my god. I haven't. You think it's the danger of catching on fire? I think it could be. Do you think it might be on fire right now?

I don't know, but let's, I think that's probably a pretty hot malt shop. Do you want me to call it? Yeah, if you could call the malt shop. Is this still the joke? This is all part of the crowd work. Okay, great. Let me try to call it.

Let's see. Hopefully, the malt shop, the person that's working isn't on Do Not Disturb because that's going to be a problem. English as a malt shop. Hi, are you on fire right now? Let me take a look. Hi, are you on fire right now? Let me take a look. Maybe?

Okay, what? What did they do? No, keep going, keep going. Do you want something or can I help you? Me? Is your refrigerator running? No, no, no, that's bad. That's bad.

Do something different. Stop, drop, and roll? No, no, no, that's bad, that's bad. Do something different. Stop, drop, and roll? No, no, no, that's just more of a fact. It's gotta be sort of a joke base. Record planes, trains, and automobiles.

No, hold on, wait. And that was a fire safety tip. That was one? That's sort of how you end it. That's sort of, that's where I've got you with my standup. I'm trying a lot of new things. Wait, but there's a fire in that place. I mean, we just called it,

there's a fire going on in your workshop. Hailey's a baby. Maybe. Who was that by the way? Hailey. That was Hailey? Yeah. Who is Hailey?

Hailey's one of my employees. How old is she? She's a senior in high school. Okay. So she's lived approximately four high schools, four and a quarter. She's closer to not existing to me. And she was saying damn kids when she hung up. She's a kid herself, but she was like, God damn kids.

Lived her own life. In the contest. To be fair, she said fucking kids. Yeah. And it is the kids who fucking do it. Step six review. Netflix review? What?

Step six review. Do you do Netflix reviews? Me? I do. What do you think of the Constantino or whatever it's called? The what? Constantin potato. What is this called? Constantin potato?

The recruit? Yeah, yeah. The recruit. Constantin potato? What's his name? Noah Constantin potato? Noah Centineo. Noah Centineo.

I haven't seen that one yet, but I'll put that on the list. But what I did watch was, do you want to guess? Bridgerton. Yes. Wow, what'd you think? Not enough fire safety sequences, I think, if I was gonna, if I had a bone to pick. There was a lot of fiery passion in it.

If I had a fire to put out. Sure, sure, if we sort of want to be metaphorical about it. And again, I don't put value judgments on that. But for me, there wasn't enough sort of like outward, I wasn't seeing any lit up exit signs. I wasn't seeing any, if we can do gel acrylic. There should be more lit up exit signs. If we were doing gel acrylic nails and lashes,

I think we can also do a close up on a lit up fire exit sign. It feels like anytime you see a restaurant scene, you never see the lit up exit signs. Which show? You have to have them everywhere, right? And I actually. So that's part good point. It feels like anytime you see a restaurant scene, you never see the lit up exit sign. Which show? You have to have them everywhere, right? And I actually- So that's part of life. It's more realistic to see.

Yeah, how come we never see anybody go to the bathroom? If I had a show, that would be all it was. People going to the bathroom? I don't doubt that. Let me ask you, what's your favorite TV show or movie or even book- In the last week. Or play that has.

You're not gonna trick me. Fire safety demonstrations. Okay, you're not gonna trick me. I'm not trying to trick you. Come on. You're not gonna trick me because here's where you're gonna go. You're gonna say Dante's Inferno.

Backdraft. Ha ha ha ha, backdraft. Ha ha ha ha ha. Everybody's laughing about it. And no, that's wrong actually. We're all laughing in backdraft. I did think backdraft was pretty funny. Everyone thinks it's so funny.

Go to the single lonely fire safety officer and do a bunch of movies about fire and or volcanoes and we're going to laugh really hard about it. Dante's Peak. Dante's Peak. Ha ha ha. Very good. Now, do you know what my favorite movie is? What's that? Pompeii.

My favorite fire safety related movie is the television series, Friends. In what respect? In the respect that they live on a walk-up and they're constantly going up and down the stairs and showing all of the entrances and exits to the apartments so you can make a safety plan for yourself. That's a good point, there's a lot of doors. There's a clear layout. I bet I could guess your least favorite movie.

Let's hear it. Cube. Cube. Yeah. We said it at the same time. Cube, gleaming, though? No, just cube. You can't tell where. Written by the creator of Oraming the? No, just cube. You can't tell where. Written by the creator of Orphan Black. Is that true?

You can't tell where any of the exits or the entrances are. There's no, there's no lit signs, there's no smoke or fire detectors. What about saw? Saw? Yeah, like that would be terrible. The first one? That one is actually great.

Have you ever seen this? My friend Andrew Lloyd Webber was telling me about this. What did he say? But I saw it about a year ago, pun intended. Pun not taken. And, sorry about that. But that would be terrible to be in a saw situation then a fire breaks out.

Do you think the saw guy, what was his name, Jake Saw, would he be like, oh, oh, sorry, you know what, I'm gonna let you out of this because a fire started. Open all the doors. That's like saying it would be terrible to be in a flood and then somebody picked your pocket. And here we're gonna have to go ahead and disagree because here's the thing. Saw in constant communication with the participants

and that's a really key important thing to fire safety is being in constant communication with the people around you. He is sort of like you should have been with your ex. Oh boy. Okay, so and that was. No, no, no, I'm just saying, I'm doing a lot of therapy right now and I'm listening to this old man being

talked to me, so I'm, I can, I can take it. I can take it. And thank you. Those rules are great. I don't put a value judgment on fiery speech, so thank you. I appreciate that. But I mean, she probably has good cross talk. Okay. But I mean, she probably had some shoes. That was a good cross talk. Okay, we'll ping that in stereo. Getting wilder than a fire, than a wild fire.

Take that one back to the lab. What about the song Wild Fire about the horse? I haven't heard it. Wild fire. Well, if that's what we're going off of, I don't think I care for it very much. I mean, I'm no, who is it? Franklin's Promise.

Franklin's Promise. Franklin's Promise. That's gonna be my next fan. What are you guys doing after this? I don't know, what do you wanna do? I'm taking that. I'm staying up. Okay, so sort of maybe I'll be in between.

I'll sort of, I'll sort of glazily look at my Instagram to see if Smokey's posted anything. If you could send one message right now to Smokey Carpaccio, what would you say? Just one? Yeah, what would you want to hear? I guess I would say, hey, it's me. It's me, Hannah. I don't know if you still have my number. This is Hannah. Just wanted to say thinking about you. Thinking about you. I am thinking about you all the time. I'm thinking about you every day. Hold on a second. It sounds very false. And it sounds like you're, what, you got to speak

from your heart. You share the life with this person and then you're not gonna say hey, how you doing? Yeah, but number What do you want to know? Let's cut down to the bone. What do you want to say? Um, I guess I would say fire has no color without you anymore. I Can see it clearly because without smoke there is no fire. Oh without you anymore. I can see it clearly because without smoke, there is no fire. Oh, beautiful. Ooh, transparent fire.

And my life is icy cold without you. And I'd like to mount that in a way in which we have both checked all of the smoke detectors, tested them weekly, check for fired hazards, look for people at risk, evaluate and enacted recorded, planned and trained, and then review the plan ourselves. Probably also ask her what recorded means. You're right. Yeah. I'll ask her what recorded means.

Do you think if scientists were to invent a transparent fire that had no odor and had no sound, that would be dangerous, wouldn't it? I think that if I was gonna ask scientists to create something, there's a bunch of things I would hope were in front of the line than that. You know? Something that mends the heart.

You can't think of anything, can you? Just a pill to mend the heart. Sure. Everyone talks about jet packs. Well, they sort of have them already. Everybody talking about them. You're hoping that science is gonna create a silent sort of like carbon monoxide is what that's,

and don't even get me started on the carbon monoxide My god, no, it's something completely different don't department assholes Are you coffee do you need some water? Wait, do you have a choking tips as well? Oh that Henry Heimlich does those? Yeah, so you don't want to get it. You don't want to get into another Pokemon trader situation. I can't. Hannah, can I ask you a question?

Yes. Do you ever feel like, because I was thinking about your message to smoking a patio. Sure. Do you ever feel like you're torn between loving fire and having to tell people how to prevent it and be safe about it. Yeah, fire is my reason for living.

People, they're the reason I'm alive. Wow. That's beautiful. Do you know what I mean? No, I got it. Do you understand? Would you be out, I got it. Do you understand? Would you be out of business if there was no more fire? Honey, we get it. Am I being clear?

What? Is this checking out? Dear, we have brains that work. We can understand. What drew you to fire like a moth? I just, I'm so sorry. I have to point this out. Scott, I noticed you have two butterfly clips in your hair

and just one strand that you've dyed pink. Yeah. It's kind of my new thing. I'm getting into anime and so many of the characters look like that. Congratulations, that's really exciting. I'm so sorry, what was your question? Not hentai by the way.

Anyway, go ahead. Different. I don't know. I'm sure they are different because whatever I'm watching is not hentai. I just don't know what hentai is. Right. Is manga a food?

It can be. Manja. Vincent, can we? It's pronounced manja. Manja. Then manga is the thing where you eat food on video or people pay you money. Yeah. Manjbang.

Mukbang. I don't know, but I'd love to find that out with you. Here's what I want to know. Okay. What drew you to fire and when, and do you think it's the same thing that drew you to smokey carpaccio? Can I be honest with you right now? You didn't understand what I said?

I didn't understand a single word you just said. What drew you to fire originally, and is it the same thing that drew you to smokey carpaccio? Is that really what you said? I swear to God. Verbatim. We all heard it. It's really hard to pinpoint where my love of fire came from.

Some can say you're just sort of born with a love of fire. It's sort of like your eternal flame that's inside of you. Oh, like you're a sociopath. I wouldn't say that. That's a value judgment that you're putting on me that I don't appreciate. Like a pyro, a pyro baby. I don't put a value judgment on it. Some would say that maybe it's just something

that I stumbled across and it just became an interest. And then others have posited that maybe it's because my house burned down and my entire family died along with that, that sort of like spread that interest. I would go with that, sooner than you stumbled across fire. You stumbled across your family burning.

How did you escape? I just think it's really hard to say. How did I escape? How did you escape? By the way, you don't have to- I looked for the smoke detectors. You don't have to repeat every question I ask you. I looked for the smoke detectors.

I tested them weekly. I checked for fired hazards, looked for people at risk. I evaluated and enacted the quarter-trend and trained and I reviewed. It was sort of like a metronome to my heart. You know how some people's hearts go, ba-bomb, ba-bomb, ba-bomb. My went smoke detectors to the, I think, detectors for people.

But now, okay, so what do smoke detectors, how? Think but this, and all is mended. Yeah, exactly. If you get on the prep, if you get on the prep, how come the house burned down and did you have anything to do with it or not, I'm not placing a value of judgment. Did I have anything? Because, yeah, again, not every question, like 75% of them, you can repeat.

Well, here's what I'll say. Well, I think with me, Hannah is making sure. She start doing it with me too. Here's what I'll say is, I don't know what you guys are doing with this, because again, I'm in sort of like outreach, so we clip everything for TikTok. So just in case we wanna clip out your voice for anything,

it's just so then we have the question. Got it, this is reality show rules. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So that's just sort want to clip out your voice for anything, it's just so then we have the question. This is reality show rules. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So that's just sort of like where I'm coming from. And it's also like a very famous on the road. Because again, I can't stress how famous Smokey and I were at the height of our- Right, in fire circles. In fire circles, in fire safety circles. I can't stress how big and how popular we were. And so sometimes people would be asking us questions left, right and center, like, is

this fire safe? Can I name my kid after you? Like all that stuff. And so sometimes people would be asking us questions left, right and center like, is this fire safe? Can I name my kid after you? Like all that stuff. And so for me- People were asking if they could name their children after you. We were sexy in the fire safety circles. And what people say is this fire safe? Did they have a fire with them? It would be sort of, well, it'd be an object, right?

So they'd have like something that was, something that was soggy, a carrot, a piece of wood, things like that. And they would just sort of go, will this survive? Is this fire safe? And so I completely live for interpretation. I apologize. No, hey, that's A, okay. And thank you for asking.

And I appreciate you admitting when you're wrong. That's something I'm really working on. Yeah. You could perhaps do it about the movie, The Music Man. Were you talking to me? Yeah. I don't see anyone else standing here, so I must be talking to you. There's a few people here.

Oh, the movie, the music man, that one where Harold Hill stole a bunch of money and those instruments magically appeared? That's right. Right. I love that movie. Somebody gets it. Well, look, we got to get Carpaccio. To our next guest. No, we got to get Carpaccio on this show.

She won't come. I got to. She won't come. How do you know? Because I tried to get her herepaccio on this show. She won't come. I gotta talk to her. She won't come. How do you know? Because I tried to get her here today. I've tried everything. But maybe she'll come if you're not here. Oh, so you're inviting her back without me.

Yes. No, we could sneak you in. Yes, yes, this is your lifestyle. So to sort of be a- This is your lifestyle, right? This? Sort of sneaking and then not saying anything and then trying to build up the courage to say something

and then chickening out last minute. We gotta get Smokey on, we gotta get Greta, Beatrice, Earl, Leonard, Grace, Buckley. I was wondering why that threw him down. Tatiana, Tatiana, jeez. What a show that would be. Boy. Looks like you got next week's episode all lined up.

Let's make sure we meet again if all of those, and only if all of them can come. I love that. All right. Are all your siblings still alive and your mother and father? No. Can we AI yet?

I am the out there. Oh, just AI yet. Oh, you can AI yet, yeah. Yeah. I love that idea. Yeah, that's a great idea. You think I had to bring back Edith Roe, I think it's beautiful.

You see that new alien movie where they bring back John Hurt. Would you like that if like a movie popped up after you die and they just put you in it? I'd love to be an alien. With John Hurt? The thing is- Acting opposite John Hurt?

I mean that would be a dream. You haven't been in any of the prior movies. Yeah, that's not my problem. Throw Robert Kardashian in there too. I don't know why they would do it, but I would watch it. You basically found out it was my idea. I'm just enjoying the idea of it.

You, Robert Kardashian, and John Earth. He's in the next Alien movie. Tupac, Abba. Kim Kardashian's dad. Obi-Wan Kenobi. Yeah, Robert Kardashian. Princess Leia. Who did you think we were talking about when we said Robert Kardashian?

Some old actor. You guys talk so fast. I'm not understanding a single word in what you're saying. The alacrity at speed is not, I think, the issue here. But look. It seems like you agree that Robert Kardashian's to be there, so I don't see why you're arguing with me right now. I'm not the one that's trying to hurt you, Scott.

All right. Well, we're running out of time, but we gotta get all of them on the show, at least in AI for the most part. We gotta get all of them on the show. But we're running out of time. We do have one final feature though on the show, and it's a little something called Plugs.

It's the end of the show. It's time to plot the fane It's time to throw what we'd rather disdain We're science for it all, so we know exactly where to go Oh yeah, that was Plug Away by Charles Whitbourne. I think that people need to know that as soon as that started, we all began dancing. Charles Whitbourne has to know that. Absolutely. At the very least. The Woodborne has to know that. Absolutely. At the very least.

The first second. Yes. Thanks, Charles. If you have a plugs theme, head over to cbbworld.com slash plugs and there you'll find all of the resources you'll need other than AI in order to make a song. So just get your own AI thing

and then you can start making songs. For Ramo Kardashian today? Yeah, or even Kim Kardashian's father. Who's that? So just get your own AI thing and then you can start making songs. Floorama Kardashian in there? Yeah, or even Kim Kardashian's father. Who's that? Thank you so much to Charles Whitbourne. All right, what are we plugging guys? Christian, you have, obviously you have the Constant Tomato coming up. Is that the sequel to the Constant Gardener?

I think it might be. What a movie that would be. He's just refined it down to tomatoes. He finally grew something. Yeah, finally. Good God. I've got the recruit season two coming out. Check out.

All I can say is queue on 2025. Yeah, check out season one while you're at it. Yeah, check out season one. I'm in it. Yeah. Watch She-Hulk. Wait, that's not my plug. That's not my plug.

Um, yeah, I'm working on a few other things right now, but I can't announce them. So I'm just going to say recruit season two and, uh, watch my whole back catalog of acting. Just go on IMDB. Check out all the credits. Hit every single one. Hit, hit up every single one. Franklin's Fault, two CDs out there.

Recognize Me Now and, uh and a self-titled release. Good luck trying to find them. That's all I'm gonna say. Incredible. Thank you. All right, let's see. Bing Lu Joe, what would you like to plug? Check out great actor Daniel Moslany on The Artful Detective.

It's back for season 55. Or Murdoch Mysteries if it's in Canada. That's right he was on that right. Did they keep him instead of you? He's still there. Tetiana's brother Daniel. Yeah. Daniel Mazzlani. I know you're listening. I know you're listening. Occasional guest star Claire McConnell. Claire McConnell. Fantastic actor. So also check out Fantastic actor. So also check out the Riotopia, Charleston, South Carolina, Saturday, November 23rd. It's the last Riotopia of the year. Wow.

It's going to be a good show, a Charleston musical. It's selling out, so make sure you check it out. Incredible. And Hannah, Hannah Byrne, what do you want to talk about? So I am currently on the Where There's no smoke there's fire tour. And we are sort of doing the Southeast and then we're gonna be on the West Coast. Where there's no smoke there's fire.

Correct. And when you say we, you just mean you. Yes, so that's gonna be a solo show. That feels like it's misinformation though. Huh? What do you mean? Where there's no smoke, there's gotta be fire. You know what?

You go ahead and send me a list of all of your notes you have in an email and I will read that and we're gonna implement those. Cause this is actually, I think really good. It feels like more of a list of all of your notes you have in an email and I will read that and we're going to implement those because this is actually I think really good. It feels like more of a text. Huh? More of a text than an email?

Okay. Well, hey, we'll exchange phone numbers. Then maybe I can get some free seats where there's going to be some really great houses that we're playing. We are playing Santa Fe Fire Department. They got a really great house out there. We are playing others. It's going to be so great.

Oh, wow, others. Please come on out. It's going to be so great. Oh wow, others. Please come on out, it's gonna be so fun. And then as well, just wanna plug a lot of really bad anti-trans bills happening across the country, you can follow Trans Lifeline, donate to them or find a local organization in your community that's doing good on that front.

Hey, voting is coming up too, so you can always vote against some of these, right? Sure. I mean, that's right. Not Christian, but other people. I'm not that's right. Not Christian, but other people. I'm not a felon. Jesus Christ, I'm a Canadian. Worse. Probably.

Okay, I plugged it, but I did a pre-plug on it, but December 13th, Comedy Bang Bang and Hey Randy, big, big show. We're gonna make this the ultimate Comedy Bang Bang show. Tickets on sale this week. The pass code or the precode or whatever you wanna say is bang 24 that you can use on Wednesday.

And tickets go on sale Friday to the general public. And then- Including ranking Roger? RIP. I'm sorry to give you more bad news. What? Dikembe and ranking Roger. Within like the space of three years. Can you imagine? I'm sorry to give you more bad news. What? Dikembe and Rankin-Roger. Not Rankin-Roger.

Within like the space of three years. Can you imagine? This is like when we lost Bowie and Prince in the same year. You didn't know about- Not the famous ones. Yeah, the famous ones. What? Not Prince Harry.

Oh, thank God he's safe. He's still with us. Not Prince Andrew. Oh, thank God. Oh, thank God. I'm glad he's lived long enough to have that surgery to correct his sweat problem. He lives to see another plane ride with you. Don't worry.

Don't worry, Bing. I'm not at the fight lodge. We're also doing shows this week. So on Wednesday, we're in Montreal and on Thursday, we're in Troy, New York. On Friday, New Haven, Connecticut. On Sunday, Tarrytown, New York. And on Monday, Red Bank, New Jersey. Tickets for all of these shows,

the links, you can get them at cbbworld.com slash tour. And we're gonna close out the year strong. I'm telling you that much. And if you've been listening to the tour episodes, you know how good they've been. This has been a real joy to be on tour this year. You can hear all those episodes at CBB World as well as so many other things. What did I say?

Yeah. Yeah. Um. The gum you like is coming back in style. Ooh, spooky for spooky season. All right, let's close up the old plug bag. We're gonna see. F. Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo Tell me your plug. Oh man, I'm gonna fly back. I wanna hear all your buzz now's the time to tell me your plug. Oh man, I'm gonna fly back.

All right, that was Not Like Plugs by Headley Lamar. Thank you, Headley Lamar. Guys, I wanna thank you so much. Christian, always great to have you here. Thanks so much, buddy. Such a pleasure. Thank you for having me. Wonderful hanging out with you. Always, I love it.

I love it. I love it. I love you. I love the abuse that you give me. It's great. And you know, it's all 100% meant. Yes, yes. I discuss with my therapist and it helps. I have discussed with my therapist as well. Really, about what?

About me and him? I've discussed. Just discussed. Oh yeah. Why are we paying these people? I don't know. You know what I mean? They hate us so much.

They keep asking me questions. They sit there just like in judgment of us. Saying, oh, you should do this, you should do that. I'll figure it out myself. Tell me about it. My therapist keeps asking if we're going to put out another album. You were in Franklin's Promise or Franklin's Fault?

Sir. I wanted to be Franklin's promised now. You're Franklin's Pregnant? Thank you so much, Hannah. I'm so sorry about everything that's going on in your life. Hey, always look on the bright side of life. Yeah, if you can get Smokey back here, would love to talk to you both and we can hash this out.

And I'm sure we could solve whatever differences you have on the show. Do you think? Yeah, I do, I honestly do. Who would be on to talk to us to help us solve out our differences? The three fellas. All of us.

The gang. The gang. And all the AI avatars. I'm gonna see what I can do. Let's promise to do a Flula episode thing where it's the same guest come back. I love that. The next time you're here.

What does that mean, a Flula episode? What is a Flula? Just check our archives. Pass. Pass? They're okay like from 2022 on. I don't have a lot of time left on this earth. You're closer to death than a two-year-old baby. But I am he is closer to not existing than me. I still am not tracking that. All right we gotta make that. All right, we gotta- It makes sense. All right, we're gonna watch the music man here. We're gonna end the- Dim the lights.

Dim the lights, we're gonna end and watch the music man. Dim the damn lights on Broadway. That's right. That's what I keep saying. We're gonna watch the music man here. Dim the lights on Broadway for the Kimbae Muthambo. Come on, he had to go at least once to a conglomeration. I'm betrayed to you. Until it's your birthday again.

Why is my baby? Alright, we'll see you next time. Thanks, bye. Yay!