Comedy Bang Bang: The Podcast - She's Back, Back in the MCU (Tatiana Maslany, Dave Theune, Stephanie Burchinow)

Episode Date: May 11, 2026

Tatiana Maslany returns to promote her new Apple TV show, “Maximum Pleasure Guaranteed,” as well as to update us about her legal actions with the MCU! And speaking of legal issues, boy attorney Robby Delmuda talks about his ongoing cases and his new career. Finally, we’re joined by a sentient and surprisingly complex Starbucks egg bite! Don’t forget to check out the Comedy Bang! Bang! Action Figures at shop.figurecollections.com and go to actionfigurecellar.com for international purchases. If you want more great episodes of Comedy Bang! Bang! become a subscriber at comedybangbangworld.com. We have all of the past episodes from the archives, every live show, ad-free new episodes, and original shows like CBB Presents and Scott Hasn’t Seen. Find more great Comedy Bang! Bang! merch at https://www.podswag.com/collections/comedy-bang-bang Get access to all the podcasts you love, music channels and radio shows with the SiriusXM App! Get 3 months free using this show link: https://siriusxm.com/cbb Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Brammy Bang Bang, Comedy Bang, Comedy Bang, Comedy Bang, Comedy Bang, Comedy Bang, Comedy Bang, Comedy Banc, Comedy Banc, Keeper, Bank, Bank, Emob. Brace yourself, I'm divorcing Godzilla. Welcome to Comedy Bang Bang Bang. Thank you to Juicy Jesse, the Juice Man, Jesse for that catchphrase submission. And welcome to Comedy Bang Bang for another week. We're in our 18th year, celebrated our 17th anniversary, and in our 18th season, as they say. Or if you break up a year in four seasons, we're in our 64th season, perhaps. But welcome to Comedy Bang Bang, nonetheless, regardless of how you celebrate your seasons.

My name is Scott Ackerman, and we have an exceptional show. We have a little later on the show. We have an attorney at law. And in our first segment, soon we will have an actor, someone in the entertainment industry, an actor, someone who studies lines and recites them for a living. We'll have all of that. What a beautiful way to put it. You're not on the show yet. Oh, okay.

Bye-bye. I got a big announcement. We're announcing our final show of our guy. And you can chime in, of course, and offer your opinion. Go ahead. Give me the details. Give you the deets. Okay. Good or bad. I want to know your opinion on what you think about this. On your delivery and on the details. Yes, exactly. All right. So we're announcing our final tour date of the Comedy Bang Bang 2026 ground beefing tour. What is that the delivery or the information? I don't like that it's the final one. Oh, you want more. Okay. That's one of those great criticisms that you get in like, you know, when you get on a job application.

You want more? In an interview? Question mark? Well, just one of those like turning a criticism into a positive, you know? Oh, yeah, yeah. Like, I work too hard. Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

But it is our final tour date. It is going on sale this week. September 19th in Los Angeles at the Orphium Theater with Hey Randy opening the show. That is going to be a big show. And it's going to wrap up our tour for not only this year, but for the foreseeable future. So that's going to be the last one. So it goes on sale this week. Goes on sale Friday, in fact.

And the pre-sale is this Wednesday at 10 a.m. local in LA. And the code is beefing. So it's Paul F. Tompkins, myself, and you know how we do L.A. We got a lot of people out here. So we want to see all of you that goes on sale this Friday or Wednesday with the code beefing. Okay, what do you think of that? You get a discount on that beef? In what way?

Like, does that get a discount? Do I get a discount? Yeah, do you get a discount on your own tickets? How many can I have? No, how, how, what's the pricing? I don't know the tiers of pricing. I'm sure that there are, it's, it's dependent upon how close you want to sit. Who's getting the cut? Everyone involved, who's on the show. Even guests? Yes, can I guess?

You want to be on the show? Yeah, sure. We'll work out your rate. Don't worry. You free on September 19th? No. No? I'm not. How do you know? How do I know? As James L. Brooks once asked America via Paul Rudd. He did? How do you know? Yes. James L. Brooks asked via Paul Rudd.

How do you know? Was he dead? Who, Paul Rudd? I don't think so. Was Paul Rudd? I don't think James L. Brooks is yet either, unless in between this taping and... Oops. Rest in peace. Maybe. Are I possible? Who knows? All right. So we need to get to our first guest. I mentioned we have an actor on the show. And she is an Emmy Award winning actor. Has one of the big golden statues. Where do you keep that thing? I think it's in a box in my house in Toronto. But a lot of your stuff is in boxes. Not just that. What if that was the only thing that was in a box? Yeah, in a golden box.

Yes. No, it's it's shoved away. It's shoved away. Do you have yours about? I don't like to. I don't like to brag. Bookmarking the shelf. But she is an Emmy Award winning actor from the show, Orphan Black, which was on BBC America, amongst others.

Channels, I would imagine. I think it moved to a channel that exists. I think it moved to Netflix. Oh, was it on Netflix now? Yeah, it was on Netflix like recently. So you can watch the show about people wanting to have cyber tales. Yeah, people wanting to cyber each other. People wanting cyber noses and all that.

There is a tail. I forget about that. Someone has a tail, right? A very graphic, moving tail. I watched a whole bunch of them when I was enlisted by you to moderate a panel. Did I ask you to do that? You did ask me to do it, yes. And-

Thanks for doing it. Yes. Yes. And I watched a whole bunch of them. The whole season in San Diego, or where was it? It's South by Southwest? Yeah, but you watched the whole season then. In Austin, yeah, like the day before the panel.

Oh, my God. Trying to cram it. No wonder your eyes were so red when I saw you. Yes, and so now I don't recall any of the details, but people had Cyber Tales. But you also can see her in such films as... Cyber Tales. Cyber Tales, Cyberduck Tales, the monkey, which. She finally got the poster.

Yes, and I haven't put it up yet. Well, it's kind of a big coffee stain on it. And it is kind of crumpled at this point. It's seen a lot of life. And she has a new television series, premiering May 20th on Apple TV called Maximum Pleasure Guaranteed. Please welcome back one of our best and best friends on the show. And I'm going to look her up to see exactly what timers club she's in.

Yeah, I was trying to think of that this morning, if it was... Why didn't you, like, just go online and figure it out? Because I'm trying to use my goddamn brain for once in my life. She is entering the... Ten timers club. Is today 10? Today's 10 on Comedy Bang Bang.

What do I get? What's my commission on this one? Her 11th year on Comedy Bang Bang. Please welcome back to the show. Tatiana Masladi. Hello. Hello. How are you?

I'm doing good. Doing good. Thank you so much for returning. I'm so happy to be. here. I can't believe it's been 10. 10 times. Now there were there was a series of years where you were filming up in Toronto yeah that you could not be on the show but now that you're more around your you've been on quite a few times. I could not be also because I think I was too nervous to be on the show. No. The first time I did this show I was like because I'd only ever listen I'd listen to you guys so

much. We talked about this when you were first on 11 years or so ago you you you used to bike to set and listening to the show? I would bike to set or like if we were doing a night shoot Christian and I would listen to you guys. Christian Brun of course. Christian Brun. So I think when we first came here, it was like we're we didn't know to speak. I understand being starstruck. We really were.

About TV or movie stars, but podcasters? Podcasters is the big one because you live with them in your ears. You're like in your private home and you're like so. So I've been in your bedroom practically. Yeah. And physically. You've been in my bathroom, practically. You make my bed every morning, which is such a sweet.

And we talked about the first time we met how you came to a live show in San Diego during Comic-Con, and you assumed the entire crowd would be dressed in costume, and you came as one of the teenage mutant ninja turtles. You and Christian both came and then realized you were the only people who were in costume. But we were trying to hide. You're also trying to hide because you're on a Comic-Con specific type show. Right, right. No one recognized you right. No one knew.

It was off-site. No one cared. That's right. We drew more attention to ourselves. You guys mocked us from the stage. Of course. And then cut two, 11, I'm sorry, smash cut two. Yeah.

11 years later. Whitpan too. A Star Wars wipe two. Diagonal wipe two. 11 years later, you're on a television show called maximum pleasure guaranteed. How does this make sense? I don't know, man. What confluence of events in that 11 years?

led you to this moment. I guess just acting really learning all those lines. Yeah. How many did you have on this show? There's, uh, I had 43, uh, episode. 43 episodes of the show? That's a big order. 43 episodes, 100 lines is a day. A hundred lines a day. Times by four, the four sandwiches, uh, that you get at, at 10 a.m. Right. Okay. Got it. Equals. I talked a lot in the, you talked a lot. Are you the, are you the, uh, main character? Are you number one on the call sheet? I play Maximum Pleasure and she's guaranteed. A.k.a. Max.

A.k. Yeah. Max. She's just a cool kid. She's got a sideways baseball cap. It's a little weird to have a show on Apple called Maximum Pleasure Guaranteed with like a rival streaming service, Max, as the first three letters. It's like if on Max you were to watch something called like the Apple Dumpling Gang,

you know, isn't it strange? But that's how show business works sometimes. where just like these things happen and no one can explain them. No one, they can't be explained even though HBO Max changed their name like a year ago.

Just to Max. Just to Max. Or is it no? Is it back to HBO Max? Oh. Branding was not good. That branding took away our prestige. So what maximum pleasure guaranteed

is it is from by all accounts it's a television show. Sure. And it's coming out on May 20th. And in the other research you've done about it, you've discovered that? I have discovered it stars you. Uh-huh.

And other than that, I know zero percent of the information about it. You watch the trailer? No. You watch the other trailer? Oh, yeah, that one I watched. No, I didn't watch either trailer. Well, what you're going to find is it's a propulsive thriller with dark comedic elements to it, following a woman who is a recent divorce day trying to get her life back together.

She's trying to get custody of her kid, but she's a little bit of a mess. Oh, no. Why do you want to play a character like that? You know, like, come on. Because I'm so together in my life. It reminds me when my mother saw the movie Flight, starring Denzel Washington about the alcoholic pilot, who, spoiler alert for the end,

goes to prison and gets his life together and becomes religious and teaches other prisoners how to get their life together. And she said, oh, I hated that movie. I said, why? Because she's like, because he was just such an alcoholic. Like I said, at the end, he got his life together. And she goes, he couldn't have done that in the first five minutes.

She wants all movie conflicts to be resolved. Resolved. Just want to watch nice people. Yeah. Exactly. But speaking of nice people, who are the other nice people that are in this show with you? The other nice people in this show are we got Jake Jans. We got Jesse Hodges.

We got Kiera Goldberg and Charlie Hall. We got Dolly de Leon. I thought you were going to say the Dalai Lama. We've got the Dalai Lama. We've got Hotma Gandhi. We've got Joe Rogan. We've got Lynn Manuel Miranda. Two sides of the same coin.

Yeah, you know, those two guys always competing for airtime. Yeah, the first five that I said were correct. Murray Bartlett. Murray Bartlett, we love Murray Bartlett, don't we folks? Do you know who Murray Bartlett is? I do from the White Lotus, of course. Yes. Yes.

And from The Last of Us. A wonderful episode of The Last of Us with Nick Offerman. Oh, boy. Oh, boy. Zombies. You ever going to do one of those zombies? Are there zombies in this show? I did do a zombie movie.

What'd you do? I did George Romero's Diary of the Dead. I never saw that one. Okay. I got to put that on the list. I die quick. I was a zombie for one second. No.

I like become a little and I'm shocked. Did you get all the makeup? I got a little bit of makeup. Then what? I got by, because my face was blown. Oh, blown twice? I don't know. There was a lot of shoot.

I was not doing well in that movie. I was religious in that movie. Oh, good. Good for you. That's why I died. So what, I mean, so you're a bit of a mess, and you're trying to put your life back together in this show, and then something happens, like a murder or something, or what happens?

She witnessed, she, okay, so she gets involved with a camboy. What? I don't know how much of this I can say. She gets involved with a camboy. Well, I mean, you can say a camboy, because no one knows what you're talking about. You don't know what a camboy is? No, what's a cam boy? How are you, friend,

on the internet at all recently. Sorry, tell me what I apologize. What is a camboy? Is a sex worker who works via video chats and will, you can, you pay them to do. Did you like how I pretended not to know what a campboy was, by the way? You had done some campboy in your life. That was really good. I believed it.

I actually believed it. And so you witness a camboy doing what? Maybe being attacked. Okay. Maybe die. This is like a rear window for the next generation. Wait, did you read that on the internet? No.

Good job. Thank you so much. That was a big reference for some of the visual stuff that we do in the show. So it's a hitchcockian. It's more like hitch your cock. Ian. Ian a Campbell. In a Campbell.

Okay, great. Well, this is fantastic. And how many episodes are we talking one or? We got 10. We did one through 10. We started with one. And we went, let's just see where this goes. Let's improv the rest.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So we just freeballed it. And so 10 episodes, and they're one a week? Or what are we talking? I think we do the two to start and then one week after that. We really want to hook you guys. I love it. Now, moving on to new business.

Big news in the Marvel universe. Yeah. You've, according to what I've read, you've patched everything up. Okay. You're back in. Okay. Yes. Yes, I am.

Tell us how this happened. This has all just been rumored, but I wanted to confirm it with you. I went back groveling. Okay, good. Hat in hand. Hat in hand. I said, you know when I won that lawsuit against you guys? Here's the money.

You gave the money back for the lawsuit because just to catch our listeners up, you sued Marvel because Marvel kicked you out of Deadpool. They fired me from Deadpool even after I shot scenes, but they didn't like my politics. Right. Feminist politics. And they also didn't like your delivery. They hated my delivery. Because you're always, I mean, one thing that I noticed on that Sheeulk show is you were always looking in the camera and talking. And they, they, I guess the editors didn't notice and they just left it in. Yeah. And so you were doing that on the movie. But when there's a movie, there's a little more scrutiny. And so they were like, hey, can you blow it up higher? You can see where the eye line actually is. So people were like. It was too down the barrel. It was called buzz. It's called buzzing the lens. Oh, okay. So people were saying like, hey, could you knock off the talking to the audience stuff? And you refused to, I read. Yeah, I wouldn't. And then they even went in. And then they even went in. And they were like, could we, do we have the budget just to move her eyes slightly to the right or left?

And they didn't have the budget for that. They didn't have it. They fired all the animators. Yeah, yeah. It's hard. And then also Deadpool started copying your style and talking to the camera as well. And you were upset about that. So you sued Deadpool for all of that.

I sued Deadpool the character. I sued Ronald Reagan. I went back in time I sued Ronald Reagan. Right. For setting things up so poorly for women. Trickle down. And you won that lawsuit to the tune of how much money did you end up winning on the lawsuit? Bloop.

Whoa. Yeah. That's a huge amount that we just had to bleep. Yeah. But it's confidential. You signed an NDA. I did sign an NDA because when I went back hat and hand, I said, here's the money. Thuf, dumped it on the table.

I dumped it out on the table so it's sort of spread. Oh, that's awesome. Was it one just giant big novelty check? Yeah, it was just one thin piece of paper that sort of rolled. But they were like, oh my God, this is awesome. Now we can make more shows. So you're back in? I am.

You're doing the Secret Wars or what is it called Doom Quest or whatever it is? It's called Doom Wars Secret, the Secret Quest. The Secret Quest. And that's new information too because they were making two different movies, Avengers, Doom, whatever, and then Avengers Secret Wars. And they combine them into one. They said slop them into the same guy. Just cut between the two. So you shoot the two thumbs separately.

Okay. And then you just cut between the scenes. Just cut between this. Oh, this is brilliant. It's actually going to be quite beautiful. Okay. Because you sort of get that like, oh, the Hitchcockian thing of like, you put this image next to this one.

And that suddenly like tells you. Also, just run them both at the same time with a split screen. Yeah. And that way I get two movies for the price of one. And you can just cover one eye if you're like, I don't like that one as much. Yeah. Yeah. So this is great.

So, but you're not playing the same character I read? I'm not. No. Who are you playing this now? the maid. You're playing the maid? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So this is like the help meets

Spider-Man or something? It's Doom Wars Secret Services or whatever. And yeah, I'm in a little maid's outfit and I'm just going, oh, I'm so sorry. Yeah, yeah. I'm going, oh, I'm so sorry. I apologize all the time. Who are you apologizing to?

Tony Stark or do? Anybody. I keep walking into rooms and I go, oh, I'm so sorry. and then I dust my way out. Okay. So you're like dusting Iron Man's armor and... I'm trying to, but I keep walking in

when they're talking about important stuff that... Oh, okay. So sorry, so sorry. So sorry. And does anyone get annoyed at you or... Everyone's annoyed at me the whole time. Oh, okay. And so they take...

They're basically like everything they wanted to get out on me, everything that they've collected from Reddit. Oh, I see. They're using the lines that all of these guys wanted to say to She-Hulk. Okay, so everything that they review bombed, you, your show with. Yeah. Tony Stark is saying it and Captain America is saying it.

Black Panther. They bring back the Ant Man and Wasp. Both of them are going at me. Whoa. Tiny and large format. No. Yeah. From a small. From a small. And you just have to sit there and take it. Yeah. But it's worth it for me just to be part of that universe again. Yeah. I mean, it was so rewarding to you. It was.

It was. It was just such an incredible experience. to be part of that. It did. It did really good things for my self-esteem and for my... Yeah. So that's great. So it's all patched up so people can look for that this Christmas. It's coming out on Christmas.

And they've combined the movies. Yeah. And they... We're doing Santa a mall tour. Wait, is Santa in this movie too? Santa might or might not be one of the secret war. It is like Iron Man flying around in the sky and then suddenly you hear, who, who, oh, oh, oh.

Yeah, and they collide in mid-air. No way. All the presents fly everywhere. everywhere and then all the children who usually don't get presents get presents. It's like a kind of equal opportunity thing. Okay, so it just levels the playing field. It levels a playing field. Between naughty and nice. Right. Okay, so Dr. Doom is getting presents, even though he's really naughty. And Thanos gets a present. Yeah. And they look at each other and a tear comes down their eye, I would imagine. Yeah. And that's what changes them into good guys. Yes. And then the Avengers, they don't,

they don't get the presents, so they become bad guys? They don't get the presents. So they turn evil naughty. No way. And all their hair kind of swoops to the side. Oh, wow. Just sort of over one eye, Spider-Man style. Oh, cool.

Spider-Man 3 style. Spider-Man 3 style. Yeah, when he's bad. You know. Yeah, of course, yeah. You created that. And he goes and does a dancing. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So they're all dancing. Okay. And, but they're like now evil. And then does your character, because this is rumored on the internet. Yeah. And I don't know whether this is true or not. Your character, the maid, picks up Thor's hammer

and turns into something? Yeah, she peels back her face with the hammer. She peels back her face with that hammer? She goes like, I'm sorry to tell you, but peels back the face. We get really great. It's actually practical. It's practical effects. Oh, wow.

And it's She-Hulk underneath. Oh, this is awesome. But she's small now and she's not. imposing. She's not imposing. She's not scary. Okay. Her hair's regular. Right. No muscles. Okay. This is good. Wearing a practical, you know, just t-shirt and jeans. Yeah, but with a push-up bra and like, when you say jeans.

Yeah, but boobs up to her short, up to her chin. You mean like little cutoff Daisy Dukes. Yeah, yeah, where you can see the bottom of the butt. Yeah, yeah. The butt bottom. The BB. This is great. This is how I wanted to see She-Hulk. I feel like we've actually seen this so many times at She-Hulk in this exact outfit. But this is great. So finally the fans are getting She-Hulk the way we wanted to see She-Hulk. Yeah. And she still sometimes does the little maid thing too. So everybody's happy. Oh, cool. Oh, that's great. Yeah, that's

perfect for her. Well, congratulations on your success. This is an amazing twist and turn of events here. Yeah. This is great. But you're back. You're back in the MCU. I'm back in the MCU. And the last scene, and I'm just going to spoil it now is one of those, like, you know, the added scenes they do at the end. So you've got to wait. Okay, got to wait until... Because, and then I was also reading, because I know what you're talking about. Yeah. This is one of the post-credit scene, the post-post-credit scene scenes. Yeah.

So, like, the post-credit scene happens, and then 15 minutes of black. Yeah. Where everyone's like, oh, I guess it's over and they're all leaving. Yeah. And then 15 minutes later, it just pops up. Yeah, the lights are up. The guys are cleaning up the popcorn. There's like, you know, come to the AMC for experiences, sort of like...

The movie trivia. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, who played Popeye? Right. So we've moved on. They're like, please leave the theater. Gene Hackman, B, Robin Williams.

C. Trick question, both of them. They did. Gene Hackman played Popeye Doyle in, of course, the French connection. So in this last scene, it's a cut to black. So we're staying in the black. Yeah. And you hear, I can't pour this out, but you hear sort of sound of water, water hitting water.

Okay. What's that? And then you hear... You're like, maybe that's someone cleaning up and they're pouring out a Coke onto the floor. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. And then you hear this.

And then you hear... And then you hear timer go off for two minutes. Uh-huh. And then you hear, oh no. And then what? And then it just cuts to you. Because I shot these myself, so I didn't have the budget. Oh, okay.

You couldn't afford any sets. Because I gave them my big slap of money. Yeah. see just a close up of a pregnancy test. No way. She Hulk's pregnant? Maybe, maybe not. Depends how many lines show up.

The lines are showing up slowly. And we cut. And we cut away before the... Oh, my gosh. God, I wonder who is the father? Or maybe she's... Maybe she's acting as a surrogate for one of the couples who already exists, like Hawkeye and Linda Cardalini.

She's trying to make good. Yeah. Wow, this is a mate. She's back. Back in the MCU. She's back. Back in the MCU. Yeah, we love it.

Do you love it? We love it. We love to see this for you. Thanks. Yeah. I really hope they go with it. I think they will. Because I wrote it as I wrote all the shows.

Yeah, you wrote all the... As I've written every show that I've ever been in. You wrote the She-Hulk show. You wrote the Orphan Black show. Yeah, which is why it's good when people write to me and go like, Hey, I would rather this plot happen. I'm like, oh, shoot, I should have written that. Yeah, yeah.

Well, you know, you've also written a show called Maximum Pleasure Guaranteed. Yes. And that's coming on May 20th on Apple TV. We need to take a break. Can you stick around by any chance? I guess. So we have an attorney at law, which is very exciting. Ooh, speaking of which.

Okay. So why don't we take a break? We're going to come right back with more Secret She-Hulk. Tatiana Maslani is going to be right back with us. more Comedy Bang Bang. We'll be right back after this. Comedy Bang Bang. We're back.

Tatiana Mislani, of course, maximum pleasure guaranteed, May 20th, and Apple TV. And how much is an Apple TV subscription running these days? It's like, for a while,

it was something like $50 a week, and then they bumped it up to like, okay, now it's like $500 a month. Yeah, like how much are we talking these days? I'd say if you want to just throw four, Four grand a year of them. Four grand a year and that'll probably get you.

That might cover most of the shows. Minus tax and tip and all that kind of stuff. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And commission. Yeah. I love to tip my streaming services. If they do a good job, that's going to start. If there's no lags? Right. I don't mind throwing like a couple hundred bucks out of them, you know what I mean?

If they immediately roll you into watching something else that you didn't want to watch right after you finish something, that's awesome. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Here's a little walking around money. Yeah. You know? Buy yourself something nice. Yeah, exactly. Buy yourself a new Applecore? I don't know.

Buy yourself a new Applecore. Used, eaten? Uh-huh. And anything else on the horizon for you? Any thing you're shooting that you can talk about or... I'm shooting a movie called Green Bank. Green Bank. Directed by Josh Ruben.

Now, normally banks are like beige or white. And this is... And what's inside. the banks is green. Yeah. So they flipped it. So now the outside of the bank is green and the money is like beige. The money is, uh, the, the bricks are money. Oh, the inside is just a bunch of, uh, you know, like concrete. This is actually not a bad idea for a movie because like everyone when they break in and they, they do a heist of a bank. Yeah. They go and do the safe to get the money. Yeah. This bank hides

the money in the bricks and all the bricks are the money and no one's the wiser. Right. And then all those dumb dums go down. But then someone finds this out and says what we need to do is steal the building. Right. And so they, what do they do? Attached like a rope to the building and put it up like. Yeah, they lasso it. They lasso it? They lasso it. The best cowboys in the West. There's a team of cowboys. It's a team of cowboys because they got to hold that big lasso. Right, right. It's got to go around the whole building. Yeah, like Paul Bunyan lassoing Babe the Blue Ox or something like that. Did you get these American folk stories up in Canada? How funny you bring it up. My Oma and Opa in their basement had a Paul bunyan pinball machine. So that was my only experience.

How interesting you should bring it up today. So in Regina, in Regina, Saskatchewan, there is a Paul Bunyan, somehow a Paul Bunyan pinball machine made its way across the border. And it's him sitting there kind of like smiling and just a bunch of ladies, scantily clad. Tiny ladies? Doinkling all around him.

and I think Babe is up in the corner doing his little cow thing. Wow. Yeah. That's incredible. What was your high score? Okay. So, so interesting, you should bring it up. My first, my high score was, so there's two rounds.

First round I got 333. Okay. And then I got my highest score. But then I got my highest score. Okay. Which is 4,000. Whoa. This was an old, this was like, ch-ch-ch-ch-t.

And it was just one point at a time. Yeah, it was like, Like that's how the points went in. Okay. This wasn't digitized. This was really old school. This is good. This 4,000 is good for that.

Yeah. I never got any higher than that. Why were we talking about him, Paul Bunyan? Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, the lassoing the bank. Right. Yeah, and who do you play? David. You play David in the movie.

Okay, great. All right. Let's move on to our next guest. They are an attorney at law. Please welcome back to the show. Robbie Del Muda. Scott. Thanks for having me back on the show

Yeah, no problem Hey, this is Tatiana Hi Tatiana how are you doing today? Have you guys met? I don't know, this is Robbie Del Muda Obviously he's a how old are you? I'm 11 years old. 11 year old boy

And just catch us up on your backstory You're an 11 year old boy But you're representing yourself in court And you had to become a lawyer I had to become a lawyer I represent myself in court I'm often in court Against my dad's company

Granite Investments Right And what was the reason? Because your dad got you involved in some shady dealings that his company was making, made you sign the contracts or something? Scott, I'm in over my head right now. All right, there's been a lot of stuff going on. I'm back in night court.

I'm in fifth grade during the day. I'm in night court during the night. And right now I'm in a bribery case against my dad. Oh, my dad's a bribery case against me. So the previous cases has been settled since the last year? They're ongoing. They're concurrent cases. Yes.

Okay. So what is the bribery case now that you're involved in? Scott, I'm frazzled. I'm going to admit this right now. I'm pretty frazzled. It seems like you're in that state every single time you come on. I know one of us has a history test later. I'm pretty sure it's you.

Yeah. Because if it's me, then... How do you think you would do? I think I would do very, very poorly. Oh, yes. Well, what period of history here is it covering? The 90s. Okay, I might do okay, actually.

I didn't know that the 90s were so long ago. We're covering it in history class now. We're focusing mainly on Pearl. Dysography. When did verses come out? Verses, I believe, is 99 if I had to guess. Scott, you are poor at this. It was 93.

Oh. Wait, I thought that was 10. That was 91. Scott, what grade did you graduate from? You're right. You're right. That's the one with the sheep or whatever. What is that?

A sheep? Yes, it's a sheep. How old were you? You weren't even alive when this, but you've been studying it in school. I've been studying it. Scott, you got to know your history. You're doomed to repeat it. I wouldn't mind repeating Pearl,

versus. It's a heck of an album. Yeah. All right. Well, great to see you. Thanks. Good to see you too, Scott. Anyways, a bribery case.

Yeah, what's going on with that? My dad's trying to frame me. Again. Yes. He says, I bribed. He says I bribed one of his competitors, marble, marble investments. And he said that I bribed them to get some detailed documents from granite investments.

And I did. I'm sorry, let me, let me figure out the chronology here. You were trying to bribe marble investments. Yes. To get documents, some incriminating documents on granite investments. So I could use the documents so that I could use them in one of my many ongoing cases with granite investments. And why would marble investments have these documents? That what, Scott, you got to get in court with me because that's what is, that's the same thing I asked the judge.

And the judge said, no, dismissed. And I was like, what? The case? He's like, no, you're questioning. So anyways, I had to get out of the witness booth. Have you ever been in class? And they say, class dismissed and you think you're in court and you celebrate because your case was dismissed? Yes, I do.

And then you realize, no, it's not night. I tear my textbooks up and a half. I say, finally it's over. And then Mrs. Bunker, my teacher says, Mrs. Bunker. Mrs. Bunker. She says, Robbie, sit down. And I'll tell you what, my face gets all red. and you know, Deanna Bermuda, my girlfriend.

Oh, that's right. Did you guys get together? It's on and off again, Scott. Oh, right. Did we meet her? I can't remember. We met her a couple of times, and it's tough because I'm juggling a lot right now, and so it's hard to make time. You've got to make time for the ones that you love, and right now I'm struggling to do that. Well, I can understand. It sounds like the majority of your waking hours are spent either in class or in court, so it must be hard to go on date.

It certainly is, and Scott, there's an added rinket. wrinkle right now. Oh, no, not an added wrinkle. Scott, I'm trying to take my mind off of school at times and off of my court cases. So I've picked up a little extra side hustle. Okay, in the gig economy, that's common. Sure, sure. And right now you're looking at the brand spanking new private investigator. A private investigator. Yeah, Scott, I am sticking up for the little guy. All right, I'm sick of getting dumped on by the big guy. And so I said, I'm going to help some others out. And maybe if I help others out, that will in turn help me.

So you're sort of like an Encyclopedia Brown type. Do you know who that is? I mean, maybe that was before your time. You're only 11. You were only born in 2015. Scott, we went over 80s history. I'm well-versed in an encyclopedia. Do you know Encyclopedia?

Did they have that in Canada? Encyclopedia Brown or would it have been? Yeah, but I don't know what I named. You don't know what it is. It was a smart, very smart young lad who would take on cases. It seemed to always be one guy, like the bully. Yes. It was always stealing everyone's pens or whatever.

And he would always go question them. Yes. And then at the end of the story, it would be like, he would say, I know who stole it. You did Bruno or whatever his name was. And then it would ask the reader like, do you know why? And it was something that was said in the questioning. And if you were smart enough, you picked up on it. I never picked up on it once.

So then why do you want to be a private investigator? Scott, I just feel the need to help others out, all right? I've been struggling so much. And sometimes I feel like I'm not getting any help. I'll tell you what, Dean Oxton, my bully at school, also the dean. You have a dean of your elementary school? Yes. And he bullies you.

Yeah, he's my main bully. Okay. Not my only bully, but he's my main bully. Okay. Anyways, I feel like Dean Oxton should be helping me out from time to time, but he's not helping at all. So I decided I need to help myself and I need to help others. Okay. And you're the first person I've decided to help.

Wait, you're going to take on a case for me? Yes, Scott. This is incredible. I didn't know I needed help. Scott, I noticed that you haven't had a cat around in a while. Yeah, that's kind of intentional. I'm allergic and... Wait, what?

I'm allergic to cats. I don't really... Do you not have a cat? No, I don't own a cat, no. I thought you had a cat, and you lost your cat. So I've been looking around for a bunch of cats. For a bunch? I brought...

Yeah, a bunch of cats. I brought a few of them in here today. Oh, no, it's in that sack next to you? Yeah. Oh, no, I... Please don't open the sack. I... God, I said, please don't open the sack.

I don't know if you heard me. I'm sorry, Scott. I only heard... I tuned it and tuned out. Oh, so you heard, please? And then you tuned out for don't. And then tuned back in for open. I was right back in it, Scott.

You can hear these cats. They're so cute. Listen to them. Ah, you can hear them later. I mean, they're silent. Are you sure they're alive? I'm pretty sure they're alive, Scott. Pretty sure.

Yeah. I would love for you to be 100%. Okay, let me take a look. Are they moving around? They're moving around. Scott, they're cats for Pete's sake. They ain't going to sit still.

Okay. So you brought a bunch of cats over here, even though I'm allergic and have never owned a cat? I've blown this first case. Hey, Scott. Tatiana, do you want a cat or? I got to be honest, I'm super allergic to cats. This is a nightmare. I can't, I can't go near that sack.

Not one program that you've been on has had a cat in as a focus. Did you ever have a cat in one of your shows? Not a single show. And if we did, we had to kill it because it couldn't be around it. So they wrote a cat into Orphan Black. Yeah. And then you got the script and said, kill this thing. I said, you got to cast it and kill it.

So you wanted it. The cat and kill the cat. Kill the cat is a book. It's a very famous screenplay, right? Oh, right, right, right. Yeah, notoriously you have to kill the cat in order to win the girl or get the gun. Ah, yes. Oh, I love here the insider Hollywood stuff from time to time.

It takes my mind off of my life. It's great. Yeah. What's your favorite piece of Hollywood gossip? Do you read Doumois? Oh, Scott. Yes, I read Dumois. Scott, hey, did you know?

this. Sylvester Stallone, he's going to make another Rocky. Wow. I mean, that's not like insider gossip. I mean, I guess it hasn't been announced to the trades. Is he going to be the Rocky? Yeah, is he? Yeah, he's going to be the Rocky.

He's going back one more time into the ring. Okay. And it's going to be very exciting. And the hope is, the hope is that the hope is that he wins. Okay. I mean, I would imagine he controls that aspect of the character. Yes. And it's as easy as if the script says he doesn't win, just crossing out doesn't.

I mean, it's my hope that he wins. I haven't read the script yet. I guess I'm just hoping that he writes that he wins. And where did you hear about this? Do moi. Okay. And it's just a new Rocky movies coming out. New Rocky movies.

It's not the juiciest piece of Hollywood gossip I've ever heard. Usually Hollywood gossip is more about like who's having sex with who or who's really an asshole on set or whatever, you know. Well, not every day's a big news day, Scott. All right. He's got to fill it in from time to time. So this is just news that you. you read today. This is news I read today. Sorry, there's not some big gossipy explosive thing

happening right now. I don't control what's going on. Okay, but you're the one who wanted to talk about it. I didn't even... Yeah, I do want to talk about it. But now I'll tell you what, I'm not as excited to talk about it. You don't like the cats. You don't like my gossip? Well, maybe you write some of the gossip that Tad has brought us, you know, with the Marvel universe stuff, you know? Yeah, you got any sweet gossip from that universe? Tadiana, look, I'm already in fifth grade. I'm in court cases, And I'm the private investigator. What do you want me? So you never watched Shee Hulk?

Huh? You never watched Shee Hulk. Wow. Wow. Open your fucking ears. Scott. That's an 11 years old. Oh my gosh.

I thought that I'm so sorry. I'm still catching up. I'm still catching up on the regular Hulk. The regular Hulk. The regular Hulk. You're starting from scratch. You start chronologically. Eric.

Banna. Bana. You went for band at first. Or Lou Forigno would be original. Because you can't understand a Shee Hulk if you haven't seen Hulk yet. You know what I mean? Yes. You have to understand that.

Lour. Yeah. Yeah. You got to know your history. Scott. I don't know if I told you this earlier, but you got to know your history. You're doomed to repeat it. I think you did tell it to me.

Yeah. Well, that's too bad that you never saw Shee Hulk. But once you do, please, I'll give you Tats personal info. You can let her know what you think about all the issues you have. And I'll bring you over the screeners and I'll sit down with you and watch them. with you. That's the service that I. Do mind if I invite Deanna Bermuda along? Because it'll be, that sounds like a great little date. I love the idea. What is your favorite thing about Diana Bermuda? Oh, she's got the

prettiest hair. Her hair is so pretty and she's so, she's so funny. She's so funny. And not like, you know, she's not even trying to be funny. She's naturally funny. She just makes me laugh all the time. And I just like, I just find anything. She's just talking, she could talk about the weather, Scott. And I'm loving it. And it. be funny if she talks about the weather? What kind of thing might she say about the weather? She said, well, what is it? Raining cats and also more cats?

Where are the dogs? And she's not trying to be funny. She's not trying to be funny. Sounds a little like she's trying to be funny. She's not, Scott. She's not. That's a genuine question that she asks, and that's why I'm like this one. She genuinely thinks that it should be, like dogs should be falling out of the sky.

Scott, do you not think that's the cutest thing? I mean, if she genuinely believes that, then I worry for her sanity, actually. Well, Scott, I'm also worried about her sanity, but that's because I care, all right? Okay, well, I don't care, but I still think she might be a little off a rocker, but that's okay. I'm glad that things are working out for you. And listeners of this show, you've been on a few times, they pointed out, for an 11-year-old, you have a relatively deep voice. Yes.

Have you been through puberty? I don't recall. Scott, I go in and out of it. So when you're on the show, you're in it. Yes. And then when I'm out of it? It's like, uh, you know how it's like when someone from, let's say someone from the south. Let's just use that as the example.

It could be anyone. Sure. It could be from anywhere. It could be from anywhere. It could be from anywhere. It could honestly be from the north. But let's just say it's from the south. And they have like a deep, beautiful southern accent.

But when they're out of the south for a little bit, they might lose it. But when they go back home, they're right back in. So you're code switching because you're around adults. As that intentional, Scott, this is just what happens. All right. I just do, I just live. I'm around. adults, I feel like I just get into the rhythm of it. And when I get back around my age,

then I got, there's no armpit hair, there's no nothing. Oh, okay. So it recedes back into your body. It retracts. It goes right back in. Is that painful? Horrifically. It's horrifically painful. Yeah. I got to grip my teeth and I bear it because I got to stay focused. Otherwise, Mrs. Bunker's could be like, could you quiet down, Robbie? And I don't want to say to my armpit hairs go back into my body. And that's what your voice sounds like when it's when you're... Right. Yeah, got it.

Right. It sounds like you have a real contentious relationship with Mrs. Bunker. She has a real contentious relationship with me. Yeah, I mean, yeah, sure. But so all of these cases are ongoing. They're all ongoing, Scott. None of them are being resolved. A couple of them are on recess right now.

And speaking of, I am also on recess right now. Yeah, thank you for making the show. Yeah. No, we are going to wrap it up at some point. Great, because I got a tether ball. I got to get too soon. Okay, so you recess. I would imagine it's lunch recess because recess is normally to, or what, 15 minutes or so?

Is it 15 minutes? Yeah. But when you're my age, they feel like they go on forever and they feel like there are no time at all. Don't they, though? But it's really just an excuse to get the kids out there running around so they're not fidgeting in their seats and scream at you, right? Yes, that's right. At least that's what Mrs. Bunker tells me.

Yeah, interesting. So all of that is going on at night. Right. You have become a private investigator at points during the day. Have there been any other cases other than this disappearance of the. mysterious cats that I don't own. I've cracked a big one, Scott. Really?

Yes, I've cracked a big one. There was a man. All right? And he said he was injured. It was I was working for a big insurance company. I know I said I was talking for working for the little man, but in this case I had to take a little bit. Yeah.

One for you, one for them. Yeah. And so he was saying that he was injured. So I had to prove whether or not that he was actually injured because he was trying to get workman's comp. Okay. How did you do it? Did you take photographs when he like to

took off his neck brace or whatever. I took a photograph somewhere he took off his neck brace and I'd follow him around when he would go for rides. And I'd say, what is he going to the gym? How would you follow him? Because you're an 11 year old boy. What do you mean following? I'd lose him right away. Are you on bicycle?

I picture you on bicycle. Are you on bicycle? I'm on bicycle right now. I'm on bicycle right now. And I lost my kickstand. It's been a balancing act and I'm struggling here. Scott, my legs are getting, my core is getting tired. You can put the bicycle down, but I didn't know that you were.

still on that. You feel free to do whatever you need to do. No, because I got to go. I got to find this guy. He's at a gym. I'm not sure which one. So you, you were tailing this guy, but you'd lose him within seconds. I lost him within seconds, Scott. So I just like, I was like, well, I guess I'm going to go get a slurpy. So then I went, I got a little something to drink. It's hot outside, Scott. We're approaching summertime and it's going to be so great. I can't wait to be out of school for the summer. Okay. And anyways, just to wrap this one up. So I, uh, Sure. By all means. Take the time you need, but please wrap it up within the conceivable future. Anyways, I think he is going to the gym. And so I've told this an insurance company, I don't know if you heard of it. It's not a few of the states. It's not some of the states. I'm not going to say which insurance company is.

I think I know what to talk about. Okay. That's right. Yeah, yeah. 100% of the states. Yeah, you know what it is. Scott. And anyways, I think that he's actually faking it. So I think. But you have no proof because you haven't been able to actually follow this guy. Not at all yet. But I got a hunch, Scott, and I'll tell you what, I got a six cents like nobody's business. Have you seen the six cents? No, don't tell me how it starts. Okay, but how it ends? Yeah.

Yeah, Bruce Willis is a ghost. Yeah, I know that part, but I don't know how it begins. Okay, just leave that up to me to see it. I mean, it's how he becomes a ghost. I mean, good for you. And what are they keeping on retainer? How much do they pay you to do this kind of stuff? I do have a retainer.

Scott, I'm getting braces. and... So they're paying for your retainer in braces in order for you to tail this guy. Scott, Deanna likes straight teeth and I want her to approve. Okay, yeah, well that's great. I mean, you know, how's her teeth?

Oh, straight and pointy. Pointy? Yeah. She has a little sharp teeth? Yeah. Has she filed him down? Or is she like a goth or what? God made her that way, Scott.

I love it. Wow. She's a woman. She's been on the show, right? Yeah, she's a child. She's not a woman. Well, I mean, she's not a girl, but not, you know, Britney Spears said. Yeah, yeah, exactly.

And so, yeah, she's got pointy teeth and she's got a, she's got a humor that won't quit. And her hair. A humor that won't quit. Yeah. Okay. And I'll tell you what's got. She's not even trying. All right.

She doesn't even try. She flash her little sweet little sharp teeth after she makes a joke? She flashes teeth that she gives me a little wink with both eyes. And it is the cute. cutest thing you've ever seen. And then during lunch, does she like tear into just like raw meat or? Yeah. Yeah.

I don't know that she's a human being. What? Is she up during the day? She's, um, she's often, she's, she's sleeping during the day. She's sleeping. She does nap a lot during the day. And then, um, she's always like reaching out to me at night, but I'm like, I'm in court right now. You can't talk right now dead.

I'd love to, but I can't. Have you ever taken a photo together or seen her school photo? I've taken a photo with her, but every time I get it developed, I tell you what, it's like she's got, she got camera shy at the last moment, she's gone. I have a feeling this is some sort of cryptid or something that. What? Oh, I don't, yeah, I don't know. You know what I'm saying, Tatiana? Let the right one in, sort of thing.

A legendary being, like a Bigfoot or? Like an angel? Scott, I couldn't agree more. Diana is an angel to me. Did she levitate? Oh, yeah. Okay. Yeah.

And it's so funny when she does it. Yeah. And she's not even trying to be funny when she does it. But I laugh and I laugh. It is so great, Scott. Okay. And she just floats around and then sometimes she gets real tiny. And she's at school with you sometimes?

Yeah, sometimes. When she comes to school, is she near the window? Can she sit anywhere? Oh, no. She's a bashful gal. So from the window to the walls till the sweat drips down my balls, any of that going on? Scott. What does she think of Lil John as a musician?

as an artist. Yeah. Because this will tell us a lot. Yeah. She thinks what we all think about him. He's great. Okay. Okay.

All right. That's in the human column. That is in the human column. Yeah. But then again, cryptids might think that little John is great too. I don't know. I don't know what a cryptid is. You know, like a Bigfoot or a Loch Ness monsters.

Oh, oh. A Sasquatch. Not specifically, but a mythical being. Uh-huh. Right. A unicorn. Sure. I mean, yeah.

A demon. Is it, that's a good question for the internet. Is a unicorn a crypted? A unicorn is considered a cryptid in the broadest sense, an animal whose existence is unfairified by science. That's a cryptid. Okay. Yeah.

So I think, you know, I don't know that this is Deanna. Deanna, what's her name? Deanna Bermuda. Bermuda, and you're Robbie Delmuda. Yeah. That's cute. Thanks, Scott. You guys are practically married.

Oh, my gosh. I couldn't even. Tatiana, I'm too young for that, but also I want that more than anything in the world. Do you guys ever talk about what that day would look like for both of you? Yeah, sometimes we do. She said, if we do, we'd have to take on or we'd have to do a ritual and I would have to, she says I'd have to become one of her, which I agree, like once you get married, you kind of infuse with the other person, right?

Yeah, this is like a splash situation, isn't it? Right. You know what I'm saying? Like he's going to have to be. a mermaid or whatever she is. Put a city fountain in his living room. He's going to have sharp teeth, whatever it is by the end of this ceremony. Yeah.

It would be difficult for you guys to do with your last names like a Brandelina type thing because it would just be either Bermuda or Delmude, Delmuda. It's Dermuda. Del Muda or Bermuda. Yeah. I guess Delmuda would be the closest thing, like just changing it to a liquid you. Yeah, I guess you know what? I never thought about that, Scott.

I guess I've just been so wrapped up with great. Granite investment court cases that I guess I just really even thought about what our names would be. I'm just trying to live my life one day to time, Scott. Look, one day of time is all we can really do. Also, one heck of a show by Wright Scott, 80's history. Now, you're blinking at me. Yeah, you're trying to wink, but you're using both eyes and you're doing it so slowly. Yes, and your tongue is sticking out.

Okay. Well, look, Robbie Del Muda, it's great to hear an update on your life, the continuing saga. Scott, I feel like I've just monopolized all the time I did. I ask nothing about you and what's going on. Oh, no, that's okay. No one needs to know about me. But we are running up here on a break. I tell you, well, why don't we take a break and we'll come back?

You can both stick around, right? Meow! Meow! Oh, they are alive. Robbie, why are you saying meow? Sorry, I was just trying to get. Are you trying to pretend that these cats are alive? Scott, I'm sure they're alive.

Diana didn't ask you to get this bag of cats for any reason. Yeah, deliver it for her? She asked if I would swing by afterward and drop them off. Whichever cat Scott didn't take. I think she's eating the cats. I think she's eating the cats. She's eating the dogs. Why do we all know that?

All right, we're going to take a break. When we come back, we're going to have more Robbie Del Mooda, more Tatiana Monsalini. We'll be right back with more Comedy Bang Bang after this. Comedy Bang Bang. We're back. Tatiana Mislani is here. along with Robbie Del Muda. Maximum Pleasure Guaranteed is the show May 20th.

Is this like a sexy show? Why is it called Maximum Pleasure Guarantee? Like, you know what I'm talking about? Like, do you... Do I know what sexy is? Do you do the dirty deed in this show? There might be a little deed dirtying. No!

But don't worry. It's fully clothed. No one sees butts. Okay, and everyone's standing up? Everyone's standing up at a distance across the room from each other. Okay. And mostly just writing on pages,

this is what I would do to you. Oh, that's hot. It's quite erotic, actually. Yeah. Yeah. Hell yeah. I love that. And the pages just get wetter and wetter.

They use them to sop their... Just your hands, because your hands are sweaty from all that writing. Oh, I see. Okay. Because you're sort of writing paragraphs. Yeah, I thought your genital juices might have been... My what?

Nothing. Nothing. Nothing. Has any interviewer ever said those words? They've said, I was just wondering about your genital juices. Only four. Variety, Hollywood Reporter,

business insider, and ink. Wow. Well, Tatiana Mislani is here, and that's fascinating stuff. Knock, knock. Knock. Is there an order for Scott?

Sorry, guys. I think I Uber-eat. Yeah, Scott. Did you order a Starbucks egg bite? Oh, yeah. Yeah, come on in. Oh, Scott.

That's lavish. You can, you know, I said it to be delivered in like at the end of the show, but sometimes they're a little early. Come on in. Come on in. Where are you? I'm sorry, I can't see you. Oh, I'm down here. You can put me on the table.

I'm inside the cocoa. You're what? I'm inside the cocoa, the autonomous vehicle delivery system. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. With the little blinky eyes. You have a little blinky eye guy. Yeah, you can unlock me and let me in. Wait, you're the, why?

You're the delivery person, but you're inside an automated delivery person? I'm a Starbucks egg bite. and I'm inside of a cocoa. Oh, you're the egg bite? Oh, okay, let me open it up here. Oh, no, that's the bag with cats. Excuse me. Oh, God, they're all dead.

You have to open the butt of the cocoa. That's where it pops out. Oh, okay, yeah. Let me just get behind it. And, oh, it's not opening up. Let me do with my teeth. Okay, okay. I opened up the butt of the cocoa.

That's good. Okay, here you are. You did great. Oh, hey, there you are, a little cutie. I don't know This is where I'm going to die Oh I guess are you

I mean you're a sentient egg bite I don't know that I yeah Yeah I'm an egg bite No you can eat me it's fine You can eat me it's fine I'm so sorry I look If it's in a consolation I asked for you to be warmed up

I thought you would have died during the heat of that No I'm built to sustain to travel Oh okay Okay but then not to sustain within my stomach I guess the acids in my stomach lining and all that will kind of tear away at you and eat you. Yeah, that's how I'm going to die. I'm so sorry, you're so cute, though. Thank you.

I mean, I could not eat you, I guess. Really? I am very, very hungry. Scott, you're protein deficient. We all know it. We've all been talking about it. Scott, you got to eat. Yeah.

Yeah. I know. You can eat me. It's fine. You can eat me. No, I mean, I don't have to eat. You seem really hungry, and you can eat me. I'm feeling really bad for you.

Well, I didn't get a very long life. Yeah, how long? Yeah, what's your history here? Well, I got frozen six years ago, and I've been kind of in a cryo state, sort of in a freezer. Like Walt Disney? Yeah, I guess. Do you know who that is? I'm so sorry.

Oh, yeah, yeah. No, I know who Walt Disney is because when they pull me out of the cryostate and I get reheated in the oven. and then they download me with kind of the consciousness of the entire world. So I do know about Disney. Oh, wait a minute. Fifth Element style? Okay. Yeah, fifth element style.

So when you got to like World War II and you saw pictures of Hitler, did you cry? I said, no, skip that, keep going, keep going. And we kept going and it was fine. Okay. So you have the entire, this is like AI or something, you have the entire everything that's ever been learned. It's not like, yeah, it's like, I guess it's AI. They show me a video of Michelle Obama. kind of explains what's all happening that I'm being reheated so that I can feed it and feed the world.

She taped that, really? Before she left the White House or after? It was time stamped four years ago. Oh, and she said Star Day. Yeah, it was Netflix branded. Oh, okay. This is higher ground. Yeah, she said it was a higher ground thing. And then you can see Barack in the back. He's waving. He's waving. Oh, that's so nice of him.

Is he waving at the camera? Is he waving at somebody else? It seemed like maybe he was waving to someone off stage. Like somebody's playing basketball with or something? Yeah, I think Michelle just didn't warn him that he was kind of walking through set and he was just kind of like... Was he sort of going like, hey, don't you want to read my 20 songs of 2026? That's exactly what he was saying. He was saying, don't you want to read my 20 songs of 2226?

My big list. Yeah. And what was the answer? What did the person say? The person was like, shush, shh, shh. We're filming kind of thing? Yeah, yeah, yeah. They really shush.

They shushed Brock up good. Okay. So then, and then once that was a... over the prologue. Yeah. Then suddenly the entirety of all of human information. All of human consciousness. And then I got putting a cocoa.

So what, you must have heard all 970, whatever episodes of this show. I heard a lot of it. I will say I tuned out for a little bit, but I was in. I would say just the first 10 years don't even bother. Yeah,

I was in, I was out, but I caught a good chunk of it. Okay. Very funny. Thank you so much. Okay. Always nice to be a fan.

Some of it confusing. Is it your favorite podcast? Well, no. My favorite podcast is The Office Ladies podcast. Oh, yeah, that's understandable. Are they going back through the episodes they've already done yet? Of the Office Ladies? Yeah, they're starting to recap.

Oh, wait, there's a recap of the Office Ladies' podcast? That's the one that I'm watching. Oh, who does that one? Oh, it's Kevin from the office. Oh, okay. And he recaps Office Ladies' Podcast. I understand. Yeah, it's really funny.

Got it. It's really good. It's really funny. And you learn a lot, but you can eat me now. You can kill me. Oh. I mean, look, I love hearing about, you know, before I kill my guess, I like to talk about their lives. Yeah, definitely. Okay, yeah.

So you started out as an egg. You were a fertilized or unfertilized egg or? Unfertilized. My mother never knew love. Oh, I'm so sorry. Did you know your mother? No. Because you came out of her butt hole or whatever, right? Yeah, I came out of my mom's butt hole and then, and she sort of nudged me to the side. I never really got to know her. When would you say you had consciousness inside your mother?

Oh, inside my mother? This is a good question. I'm just want to get it straight. Yeah. Because if you remember that, that'll settle a lot of issues. Yeah, I would say I would say I got it. Conception probably. Yeah, I got.

Was it when your dad, if you had a dad thought about fucking your mom or was it? No, I gain consciousness at about like 20 weeks. Oh, yeah. Great. Yeah. That settles it. Yeah. Okay.

Perfect. So, yeah. It was like, Scott, you either could have killed me early, but now you can kill me now. Okay. Well, I mean, I feel bad doing it now. I mean, now that I've got to know you. I barely got to live. What did you do when, after you were born after you, you know.

Well, I got. I guess you weren't born. You came out of your. I came out of my mother's bottle and then I got cracked into like a big old pot and I got mixed up with a bunch of other eggs and they added bacon and cheddar. Wait, so you're a whole bunch of different eggs right now? Well, I'm an egg bite. Yeah. So you're a whole, but you're like 20 different eggs?

Yeah, I mean, it's Starbucks, Scott, they're not doing single eggs. It's a big mixture. There's a little bit of, there's a bit of egg formula that's not entirely egg, but they can brand it. So are you like a split personality, like a sibble or something like that, but an egg bite? If you want to call it that, that's fine. Who am I talking to right now? Which personality am I talking to right now? Right now you're talking to, well, eggie.

Eggie. You're talking to eggies. Okay. Can you access any of your other egg person? personalities or... Yeah, but you don't want... You're like some of them. Some of them are a lot meaner than me.

Okay, well, who else is in there? All right, let me try to channel... Let me try to channel Yokesy. Yokesy, come out. Yokesy come out. It's me, Yokesy. Oh, Yokesy? Tad, are you all right?

No. You've never been around that type of male energy. No, it's so aggressive. You want to eat me, bitch? Oh, my God. Try. Oh, my God. Yokesy.

Yokesy. Hey, hi. This is Scott Ockerman. I'm about to eat you. All right. That's fine. What was your life like? Oh, my life. I got popped out of my mom's butthole and then I was mixed up into a bunch of stuff. And then I went into a big freezer, went to cry. Oh, learned about the world. I came out and I have dreams.

What are your dreams, Yokesy? Well, I'd love to, I'd love to have sex with Frankie Munez. Okay. I mean, I don't, look, Dad and I work in Hollywood and we don't want to brag, but I think we can make that happen. I'm serious. Because when I came out of cryo and they were downloading stuff, I got really into Malcolm in the middle. The new one or the old one? Oh, the, well, I'm saving the new one.

I'm loving the old stuff. If we could, okay, so an egg bite is circular. If we could cut a little tiny hole in the middle of you, is that where you are yokesy? Or because I want to make sure you. Oh, you're dead seller. Oh, no. Oh, of course. Well, I hear a little bit of Hollywood gossip real quick.

Yeah, please, Robbie. Frankie Munis has had some hair work done. What? I'm still on the season six, so I haven't seen it. Oh, no, they're back doing a whole new season of, uh, did he have to go back into puberty? Did his hair go back into his head or is he, his own head? Oh, is that what happened?

He lost all of his hair because he was regressing into before puberty. Well, is this like a now time? Is it like Malcolm now or is it Malcolm then? Malcolm now. It's Malcolm now. But he thought it was, he was like, hey, we're getting the group back together. Right. So he regressed his hair.

Yeah. Oh, I just changed. I just channeled all of human consciousness and I got the answer. Oh, okay. He was sort of having a receding care line, so he went to Turkey. Got it done no problem. Oh, the Andrew Garfield. Oh.

Oh. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Common knowledge. Okay. Oh, interesting. Well, Yokesy, I would cut a hole in the middle of this egg bite so that Frankie

Mewis can stick his penis into you, but I'm worried that he would take out the part of your consciousness. No, I'm going to have sex with Frankie Munes. Oh. You're going to do. Oh, okay. So you want to be stuffed into him. Yeah. Would you eat Yokesy and Aggie after that? After that? Yeah. Would you let them live their lives and then eat them? Oh, please, Scott. Please let me go inside for you mute and then eat me.

It's not the worst thing you've ever done? No. It's not the grossest thing I think that I've ever done. What is the grossest thing you've ever done? I don't think that I want to say it on this show. Oh, I forgot. I have all of human consciousness. And I know and it's nasty. Oh, shit. I do know it's next.

Have you been looking at me through my computer? Yeah, well, no. Nice setup, by the way. I know what everyone's thinking about everything. Oh, really? Yeah. You can just interpret it or interpolated? It was all downloaded to me when Michelle Obama gave us that speech.

Oh, okay. What is Tatiana thinking about? I've always wondered, because she's very opaque. Oh, closed book. Uh-huh. Tatiana's talking something about She-Hulk and the Money? That's right. I am thinking about She-Hulk and the Money right now.

Are you regretting your decision? I was just thinking she Hulk and the money. They're both green. And then dot, dot, dot, dot. Yeah, she's thinking something about how she didn't give all the money back. What? Wait, what? Oh, my God.

I don't know what that means. Yokesy. This is why I was afraid of Yokesy because Yokesy is a truth teller. Oh, no. How much did you keep for yourself? If you don't want the truth, you can just eat me, bitch. Maybe I will. No, no, no, no.

Oh, Yokesy's retreating. Oh, wait. Whoa. Oh, hey, who else is coming back? Who's coming back? Hello. Oh, some sort of British egg? Oh.

Hello, I'm Whitey. Oh, a British or Australian? Like a Scotch egg. Yeah, I'm a Scotch egg. Oh, Scotch. I thought I recognized that accent. Yeah, this is a Scottish egg. We'll settle on it at some point.

Top of the morning, dear. No, that's absolutely Scottish. And I've also studied dialects. That is a deep Scottish accent. Yeah, we're doing a show in Glasgow soon, so I really want to pick up. Yeah, you're going to want some tips. Oh, they'll love this in Glasgow, I can tell. Oh, okay.

I'm absolutely positive. And what's your name? Oh, I'm Whitey. You're Whitey. Okay, I don't know. Is it Whitey or Whitey? It's Whitey. We're saying the same thing.

Whitey. Oh, okay. Whitey. Is it like Wally where it's White Dash E or? Yes, it's white dashy. Whitey. Whitey. Okay, well, Whitey, so wonderful to meet you.

Oh, fantastic. Whitey's kind of like a lad. Yeah, yeah. I sort of want to have a pint with Whitey. Yeah. Oh, you guys want to have a bite? Let's go have a pie. What are you all about, why?

Do you tell us about your life? Oh, me? Well, I was pooped out of my mom's butthole. It's a pretty common theme. Yes. And then I was mixed up into a big old bowl. Scottish? I was mixed up into a big old bowl.

And then I was mixed up with some other eggs and bacon. Just think Shrek. Just say donkey. I have to say donkey. I have to do that too sometimes. There you go. There you go. I was mixed into a big old

ball in You're asking it Say donkey Any time you lose it Say donkey Donkey Donke And then I was

I saw the Michelle Oh Donkey Donkey Donkey Donkey Donkey Donkey

Donkey Donke All the human consciousness has confused my accent a little bit Oh I understand That you've just heard

every single person I've heard every YouTube video Every podcast No exactly And I guess I guess

You can eat me if you want fine, whatever. Okay. I just, I would love to see Oppenheimer before I go. Oh, you, wait, so all of human consciousness was downloaded into your body except Oppenheimer? I missed it. So you saw the Academy Awards telecast where it was celebrated?

Yeah, yeah, I saw that and I go, I got to catch that one. And I just missed it. Why would they? I saw Barbie twice. Oh, they thought they were showing you Barbenheimer instead of just Barbie twice. I just liked Barbie, so I saw it twice. Don't get, don't get. So, don't get.

Okay, we need to talk to someone else, Hey. All right, cheers. Who's back? Is this eggsy back? Who do we have? Eggie. Yeah, you guys, Eggie.

Oh, hey, Aggie. Wow. What a trip inside the egg bite that is you. Wow. Yeah, I'm a lot of stuff, but you can kill me now. Um, all right. I mean, we were thinking about sticking you up, uh, Frankie Muley Oh, you talk to Yokesy.

Yeah, yeah, you've talked to Yokesy as well. Yeah, Yokesy's, and he's mixed in with me. He's talking about Minky Mewis. So we were thinking about doing that unless you have any objection. I mean, look, you're going to be inside someone's body, either the front hole or the back hole. Yeah, I guess it's kind of the age-old question. Would you rather be in Scott's stomach or Fanky Munoz's urethra? Oh, wow.

Oh, wait, you think you're going in that hole? I don't know. What are you guys? Docky. I think we're, uh, there's, there's a different one that I think we were talking about, but that's okay. We, we don't need to get into the physiology of it. No, and like whatever you're into, go for it. Yeah, sure. Yeah. Well, I guess, I can, we can ask Yokesy, what do you think?

Oh, is Yokesy coming back? Yeah, you can, you. Yeah, which hold did you want to go into Frankie Munis? I was thinking you're rethro. Oh, yeah. Okay, then why did you? I was, I was saying we would cut a hole in you and Frankie would Yeah, I thought you were cutting a hole so that you would just get me out of it. of the egg bite and then stuff me in the hole. Oh, no, he'll stick his penis in you.

I think he'd be more into that, honestly. Oh my God, let me check with the boys. Make sure that's okay. You're good. You're getting content with all the personalities. Why do you call if Frankie Munispo's dick in us? All right, don't get. All right.

No problem. No problem, brothers. As long as it's okay with Iggy. Yeah, that's okay with me. Okay, so you're one of those split personalities that only has three. Okay, interesting. We don't, we don't really. You know, even Tatiana played seven different.

people. How many did you play? None of them were eggs. Yeah. We thought that. We thought that. Were any of them Scottish, though? No. Did you ever get to say donkey? I didn't. I tried desperately and they cut it. Oh. Because it's hard. It's next to impossible. Yeah.

It's one of the hardest things the person can do. Well, tell you what, Tad and I will both, I think, Frankie from different angles. Yeah, Frankie gave me half of his phone number. Did he give you the other half? He did, yeah. Okay. So, war game style, we have to be next to each other and do it. Just sink your phone. Okay. Sink your phone with me. Okay, I'm sinking my phone to yours. And, yeah, it is a long process. Can we visit the set?

Of Malcolm, the current Malcolm in the middle reboot? Yeah. I mean, if it's still film, I'm pretty sure. I bet it'll get picked up, right? Yeah, they're doing very shoes. It's not one of these Star Trek Voyager type. No, no, they won't. Whatever is called.

What was it called Star Trek? Friends? Friends? Star Trek Friends. Star Trek Friends. Yeah, the cast of Friends, they do a little episode. They get into the Star Trek universe. I would love that.

Yes, we're blending crowds, we're blending audiences. Yeah. Yeah. Anyway, we're going to text him once we sync our phones, if that's okay. And then we'll shoot him over to you. He'll, you know, stick his penis into you, or shoot you right back here. And then you'll kill me.

And then we'll kill you. Yeah, that sounds good. What a life. What a life, though. I mean, what an experience. A lot of people don't even get to do half of that. Yeah, I'd still, I'd love to see Paris, but whatever. Oh, I don't think that's in the cards for you.

I don't think you would last that long, honestly, now that you've been cooked and Yeah. Do you mean Paris, Paris or Paris Hilton? Paris Hilton. Oh, okay. I think I've got her, the middle part of her number, but not the front and the last bit. Oh, I have her sex table. I'll just show that to you. That'll do the trick. Sure. And then I'll die. Yeah, and then you'll die, yeah. But I mean, look, a lot of people never even get to see her sex date.

It's so true. Yeah. So, I mean, you know, you're one of the lucky ones. I have all of human consciousness and I actually have seen it. Oh, you've seen all the sex date. What did you think? I thought it was beautiful. Yeah, it's like really well shot. Two human beings enjoying each other. What could be more beautiful than that? Speaking of which, maximum pleasure guaranteed May 20th. Two women, people enjoying each other.

Uh-huh. Two women? Is that a spoiler? Yeah. Yeah, it's a spoiler. Well, speaking of that, egg bite and eggie, I guess is your name. We are running out of time, but we only have time for one final feature on the show. that is, of course, a little something called plugs. The outside world is looking weak. We could use a smile.

A budd project just might do the trick to shut it out for a little while. So no matter your content, I'm glad they help you pay your rent, unless you're rich, in that case, which I'll buy it in. All right, that was J.K. about pirating piracy funds narco-terrorism by the Canutzen. Thank you to the Canutzen for that plugs theme. If you have a plugs theme, head over to CbbbWorld.com slash plugs and upload it over there. You also have everything you need to make the plug-bag remixes for the closing up the plug bag. And what are we plugging? TAT, obviously big year for you. We have maximum pleasure guaranteed coming out May 20th.

Maximal pleasure guaranteed May 20th on Apple TV. And then also the Avengers, what is it called again? Secret Doom Avengers Wars, colon friends. Colon friends. Oh, okay, great. So they're colon friends? A lot like what Frankie Muniz is going to be. Is Frankie in this?

He is, yeah. Who's he play, Iron Lad? Yeah. I'll be checking out. The tiny egg. And yeah, he's great. It's great. Okay.

Work with the legend. Can't wait to see you back, you know, as that big green girl. Me too. But she's tiny. Don't worry. And she's in intimidating. Yeah. She's got big, big boobs.

Still got big boobs, but she's very small. So most of her body is her brass. It's just boobs. Yeah. Okay. Got it. So weighs the same. Ways the exact same, but it's all.

It's all just sucked into the boobs. Yeah. Fantastic. Robbie Delmuda. What do you want to plug? Scott, I think if you want, you could be checking out St. Dennis Medical on NBC, more like. at this point on peacock and also on Netflix.

Now, when Mickey Leaper was on the show, yes. I guessed that there would be a scene where someone adds a little tail to the D of St. Dennis. So it says St. Pines. And he confirmed that that was going to happen. But I understand from fans of the show that that scene has not been on yet. Is it because I spoiled it before it actually came out and they erased it?

Scott, it hasn't happened yet. but filming of season three starts up soon. Okay. So I'd say just, you know, keep your fingers crossed and keep your eyes glued to the screen. This is going to be amazing. Okay.

Yes. And if you want to also check out some stuff, you could check out, you could check out Dave Tooney doing some improv comedy at World's Greatest Improft School, Sunday nights in a show called Living Room, or you can check out shows at UCB,

like Ben-Rand. In Los Angeles. In Los Angeles, California. Do they live stream these, though, sometimes? They live stream a lot of these shows. Scott and you can check them out right from the comfort of your own home. Oh, and I hope their homes are comfortable.

They are so comfortable. You've got to imagine it, Scott. If they made it a house, they made it a home. And so you could check out Ask Cat or Bangorang and check out those shows as well, Scott. Okay, fantastic. And Aggie, I mean, your life is almost over, but do you have anything to plug? Yeah, I would say you could check out Steph Burch one, I think, on Instagram and she'll post about shows. There's an awesome improv team called Shagg that plays in Los Angeles.

And then also is going to New York in June for the DCM. For the DCM, yeah. Fantastic. And speaking of live shows, I'm going to plug, of course, that's Los Angeles show, September 19th here in Los Angeles at the Orphium. It goes on sale this week, Friday. But if you want pre-sale tickets, use the code beefing on Wednesday at 10 a.m. And also check out all of our other live dates. The tour is rapidly approaching.

We start May 24th in Toronto. And we're going to. the Midwest after that, all sorts of places, and then we're going to the south and then the east, and then the west. You're going central ever? We're doing Denver. Is that central? I mean, central time zone, isn't that Chicago and everything?

Don't ask me. Okay, I won't. Because you're from Regina. Like, what do they even use for clocks over there? We're the only province that doesn't have daylight savings time. Congratulations. And in my basement. There is, of course.

Paul Bunyan, pinball machine. Wow, two great facts about Regina. And I'm so glad you ask. So anyway, check out all of the live dates and you can get tickets for those. They're still on sale over at CBBWorld.com slash tour. And while you're over there at CBB World, check out all of our shows. We have great shows like, Hey, Randy, and the neighborhood listen, and Scott hasn't seen. So much stuff over there.

All right, let's close up the old plug bag. Oh, hell yeah. That was, close the bag and open your butt remix by Brandon E. Gaylor. Thanks so much to Brandon. And guys, speaking of a thank you, thank you to you. Tatt, wonderful to see you. Great to see you, Scott. And I hope to see you back in December, plugging the Avengers show.

Yeah. And, you know, let's make it a more regular occurrence that you're here. Yeah. Yeah. Ten times over five years or six years. 11. What? That is not a good ratio.

I mean, it's almost once a year, so it's not bad, but let's get your stats up. I need more, I need more jobs. I need more jobs. You need to be plugging more stuff because I only like to have you when you're plugging something. That's true. You're such a fair weather friend. I really am. You're like, are you working?

I'm glad you noticed. Yeah, I did. And Robbie Delmuda, thanks so much to you. Thanks, Scott, for having me on. I'm just going to leave a couple of these cats here. No, please. I don't want you to leave the dead cats here. In fact, I think that Diana, is that her name?

Deanna? I think she's hungry, so I think you're going to want to bring them all to her. You know Deanna pretty well. She's pretty hungry. Yeah. Let me know whenever that ceremony occurs, by the way, that turns you into whatever she is. You'll be the first I invite. Okay, great.

And Eggie! Yeah. Did we get, Tad, we got to check in with Frankie Bunez. Did we get anything back? He just sent three eggplants and one egg. Oh, yokes, he's going to be thrilled. Okay, well, I mean, let's, uh, Is this machine still here to transport you over to Frankie Munis's house?

I can hop in the cocoa and zip on over to Woodland Hills. We can just input directions into him? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, great. Well, and then... And then I'll come back and you can kill me. Okay, yeah. How long do you think it's going to take for Frankie to do all this stuff?

You guys know him better than me, but... He's a fast operator. Yeah, okay. Yeah, he's kind of in and out. Because I am starving. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sort of thinking that maybe I don't let Frankie have a crack at it because I'm... Maybe you just go.

Why are you? You just nibble a little bit of you before I... You can hop in the coke. Okay, you can... Let me just nibble a little bit of you. I don't know which part of you I'm going to be eating, but... You can aim for the side because that's Shelly and we don't like her that much. Shelly!

Oh, okay. Really? There's some shell in there's some shell? Yeah. Well, just a little bit, and it's a small enough amount that they can still market it as food. Oh, okay. Let me nibble just a little bit of you. Oh!

Oh my God! No! Oh my children! Please! Please! No! Ah! Oh my god! He won't just like take a full bite!

He's just gnawing! Your teeth are so sharp! They're sharp like a cryptid! Yum yum yum delicious. All right, we'll see you next time. Thanks, bye!