Comedy Bang Bang: The Podcast - Tony! Tony! Tony! (Paul F. Tompkins, Lily Sullivan, Shaun Diston)

Episode Date: March 2, 2026

The table is round, but our focus is squarely on the issues. This CBB roundtable features a triumvirate of Tonys— as Alimony Tony, Tony Sony and Room Tone Tony debate the most important topics of the day. There will be locker room talk. Plus— even more Tonys! Don’t forget to check out the Comedy Bang! Bang! Action Figures at shop.figurecollections.com and go to actionfigurecellar.com for international purchases. If you want more great episodes of Comedy Bang! Bang! become a subscriber at comedybangbangworld.com. We have all of the past episodes from the archives, every live show, ad-free new episodes, and original shows like CBB Presents and Scott Hasn’t Seen. Find more great Comedy Bang! Bang! merch at https://www.podswag.com/collections/comedy-bang-bang Get access to all the podcasts you love, music channels and radio shows with the SiriusXM App! Get 3 months free using this show link: https://siriusxm.com/cbb Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Mock Mopamie Bang Bang, Comedy Bang, Comedy Bang, Comedy Bang, Comedy Bang, Comedy Bang, Comedy, Bang, Comedy, Bang, Mock Turtle, but I love him in entourage. Welcome to Comedy Bang Bang Bang Bang! Thank you to Side of McGee, catchphrase superstar, Side of McG for that wonderful catchphrase submission. Not going to stick, though, but welcome to Comedy Bang Bang for another edition. My name is Scott Ackerman. Wonderful to have all of you listeners back. And this is a very special episode. As discussed previously on Comedy Bang Bang,

normally when people come to the stud here, Stu is short for Studio, they enter the room and they are met by the site of a purpose. perfectly rectangular table. And they glance at this table and they say, hmm, that's a rectangular table. Mentally, I believe. I think it's 100% of the people who do this.

And they say, hmm, rectangular table. And they think nothing more of it. They sit down. We do a regular episode. A great time is had by all. There are occasions, however. Where in the dead of night, the night before an episode is taped,

I will get some little worker bees in here and I will take out that rectangular table and I will swap it in for what's in front of us right now. And that is, of course, the CBB roundtable. That's right, guys! We have the CVB roundtable this episode. We all know what happens here. The table is around,

but our focus is squarely on the issues. What we're going to do is we're going to have an esteemed panel of guests here today talking about what's going on in the world. A lot of people are like, you know, this is a time of tumult. Things right now are so up in the air in a way that I haven't seen in my lifetime. And hopefully we're going to hammer out some of these issues today and we're going to figure some of them out. Let me introduce our panel of guests today. You know him as the eccentric billionaire or millionaire? At this point, I've lost track.

It's definitely past billion. Yeah. Why would you have to keep track of it? It's never going to run out, right? That's exactly right. Do you agree, by the way, and I'll introduce you in a second? Please. I came up with the theory today.

I love theory, Scott. Do you really? What's your favorite one? Because it uses your imagination. The theory, probably gravity. Relativity? What about that one? Relativity's pretty good.

Yep. Not quite sure what it means. I don't know either. It's like this is maybe... I know it's very important. As much as this. E equals empty squared. Yeah.

And we must cherish. And then one of them is time, but it's not T equals MC. Time plus tragedy equals comedy. In any case, he is either a millionaire or a billionaire. And would you, is it safe to say you are eccentric? Some might say, in fact, many of my ex-wives have said I was eccentric. I think we're all a little bit eccentric in our own unique ways. Do you think everyone is?

I think so. Everyone has their strange little peccadillos. Even the fellows from the McNeil Ler report. I thought you were going to say from the McDonald's playhouse. Even the fellows from the McDonald's playhouse. I'm talking, I'm talking the fry guys. Are they eccentric? They love fries.

Who doesn't? Mayer McChese. Big MacGreeze, big back. Grimmis, of course. And of course, Grimmis. Was he part of the gang, the hamburgler? Or would he come and steal all their stuff? I mean, he's in a lot of photo shoots with them.

Yeah. But he was a criminal. And they didn't want him stealing those hamburgers. That's true. That's a good point. But I bet they considered him part of the gang, though, because they all grew up with him. Yes. You know, it was like heat where those two had lunch together that time.

Yeah. Oh, at Kay Manalini's? Yeah. They wanted to have a nice little lunch. Wasn't lunch or was it nighttime? It felt nighttime. The whole movie felt. Although I guess the big set piece takes place during the day, doesn't it?

She's got a great ass? That's what I consider the big set piece of that movie. Were there any other takes of that? I would love to see like a blooper reel of him doing different. He just tosses one off. She's got a great ass. He is the inventor of gaseous paper. No, sorry.

My dear depotted mother. I have the heir to the gaseous paper fortune. But speaking of which, let me get back to my theory. I think, oh, great theories. When people die, they should have to give all their money back. So that, that way. How do they do that? They just give it back to the government or whatever.

It goes in a pool. How do they get? Oh, okay. And it gets redistributed to everyone. Right. You know. And so that way, everyone has to spend, like it's a race to spend. It's like Brewster's millions.

You have to spend all the money you earn. And that way, there aren't these people who are just trying to hoard it and hoard it and hoard it. But this is if you know you're going to die. Oh, you don't think you're going to die? No, no, no. I mean, you know the hour of your death. Oh, sure. But I mean.

Because you don't want to outlive your money. I guess there are some people who. But I mean, I think that's a better thing of like, you know what? I'll keep a couple million. just as a cushion for the pushing, of course. Can I ask you a question, Scott? Why do you think this? Because you find so many people

like trying to hold on to it and trying to hold onto it. And then you have the problem of generational wealth and all, you know, and all the... Certainly. But I mean, are you talking about everybody, no matter how much money they have? Or you're talking just about the billion. Everybody, no matter how much money they have. They've got to push it into the table when they die. Oh, I don't know about that.

Because what about poor widows? Poor widows? Yes. Meaning that, see, this is the problem when people have families is that, you know, you work so hard because you want to give it to your kids or whatever. That's right. But I think it just, nope, just goes away. So you're, now you are a father yourself. I am.

And so you're fine with your buddy. I'm fine with my money. None of it going to your daughter. Yep. Make your own. Wow. Of course, I'm going to put everything that I own in a trust for her. So that it'll be her money.

Do you feel that this is a theory or it's more of a belief that you have? I really don't even know if I believe it or theorize it. Yeah, because I have to say, now, look, I've told you, I've told you, I love theories. I don't know if this qualifies as a theory. I don't know. I haven't really thought it out. But he is, of course, the heir to the gaseous paper fortune. That's correct.

Please welcome back to the show, Alamoni Tony. Hello, everyone. It's me, Alamoni Tony. Tony Jacaroni, of course. Tony Jacaroni, yes. my name. We have been hearing you recently on the bonus bang episodes, and also you just put out another episode of your offshoot show, the Alamoni Tony's Valamoni Shoney.

Alamoni Tony's Valamoni Shoney. That's where I get a round table together of my, a round table of my own together of my some of my X-Y. Now, is your table actually round, though? It is not. It's a square table. Oh, okay. Yes.

It's not an octagon, though. It is not an octagon. Not enough tables are octagon. No, I wish more words. You know what? I'd like to see an octagonate table. octagonal table and painted like a stopside. Wouldn't that be fun? Yeah, that would be so fun. Like, you go into Marie calendars or a restaurant, usually if you go like, there's eight of us. They just put you at a big round table. What about an octagon? How about it? That everybody gets that to be at the head of the table. Yeah, exactly. And they only save it for parties of eight. That's right. Yeah. Welcome to. Parties of eight. Pirates. Oh, that's pieces of eight. Yeah. Party of five is what you were thinking of. I'm always thinking of party of five. Aren't you though? Nev Campbell. Yeah. The other. Lacey Chabair

L'Aye Lost guy Yeah lost guy Jack Sawyer A fifth Yeah Who's the fifth A baby

Oh right They had a kid or something Right I think they had a baby Yeah Who knows Has anyone ever watched that I wonder

Has anyone ever watched Party of Five? Yeah I mean it seemed to be a hit But I never talked to Anyone who watched To a single person Who ever saw a single

I can't have Children myself Of course Because I have What Talked is called No Motility That's right They're just dead in there

They're all in there Yes. But they're just floating. No, they just went down to the bottom. They just sank to the bottom. It's wonderful to have you here, Tony. Wonderful to be here, Scott. Thank you.

Let's introduce our next guest. You know him as the owner and proprietor, I would imagine, of So New York Pizza. We first got to know him because former guest, Jake Johnson, thought he had been talking to Sony, the movie studio. and it turned out that this was a person who just worked for So New York Pizza. Please welcome back to the show, Tony Soni. Hey, thank you for having me on traders. I'm not faithful. I'm a faithful.

I know. I don't know. Just because the table is round, doesn't mean you're on traders. I'm not faithful, Scott. I promise you. I don't know, Tony. You seemed sort of uncomfortable when Scott was talking to me. I don't know, but all I'm going to say is you were over by the bathroom for a very long time.

And I know that. that's not faithful behavior. And I'm suspicious. I can promise you all of a faithful. For you to accuse me. If you banish me right now, you're making a big mistake. I like when people say like, I'm a faithful. Why would I would never be a traitor?

No, you're just picked by the guy like tapping you on the shoulder. But yeah, you don't have to want to be anything. But you know, really? Is that true? I think so. This is what I said to Alan Cummings. I said, I swear, I can't be a, I can't be a traitor. Please don't make me. I'm such a good person.

Like, we are fucking... Was Alan Cummings offering you to be on the show? Or did you just see him? I saw him at the airport. Oh, okay. And I came up to, I said, please, please, please. So if you were on the flight, you know, there'd be four people who are picked as traitors. You try to crash the flight.

I'm going to tell you something. I tried to get a game going on the plane. Nobody wanted to play with me. Yeah. I was screaming from waving the back. They put me by the bathroom. You were by the bathroom for very long time. Now, that is the traitorous thing.

That's where they put me, okay? That's where they sent me in the back of the plane. Tony, it's so great to have you. Of course, we got to know you on that Jake Johnson episode. We've grown to love you ever since then. We watched Madam Webb together. We loved Madam Webb. Such a good film.

Such a good film. What's going on with you lately? Can you catch us up? You haven't did on the show in a bit. Let's see. Well, my wife, I don't want to talk about it. Oh, yeah. What is going on with your wife?

I don't want to talk about it, but she is at the Olympics right now. Oh, that's right. She's an Olympian and a doctor. She's a doctor. She does BBL. She invented it. The Brazilian butt lift. What is her sport? Her sport is a skeleton. The skeleton. That's what they, okay, that's like the luge, but it's face down and headfirst. Face down, headfirst, street down the fucking thing.

They call it a skeleton? Yeah. Oh, how morbid. Because most people die. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah, and then they're decomposed and then they were turned into. Oh, I thought it was because all the athletes have skeletons.

Oh, I think most of them do, no matter what the. sport is. Most of them. But most of them also have those really big skeletons you put on your lawn. Right. And they dress it all year long, Scott. They put the Valentine's Day outfit. They put the Fourth of July. So your wife, you know, the Olympics are over at this point. Your wife is still out there? It's over already. It just started. You're kidding me. It's over? Yeah, it's done by now. Oh yeah. What day is it now? I mean, I have no idea when it is. But the Olympics are over at this point. So is your wife lying to you? I don't want to talk about my wife. I don't know what

she's doing over there in Italy or whatever, but you know, and then my guma. Yeah, yeah, what's going on with your girl? My guma, I love my fucking life. She is in the Galapagos getting eye jobs. She's getting multiple eye jobs on both eyes. A multiple on both eyes or just one per eye and that

constitutes multiples? Multibles. Yeah, she's getting one on each eye. She's getting the fed from her ass put into her eyes. Okay. Into the eyeballs. Because you want it to be, you want fat eyes.

You want fat eyes. Yeah, that makes sense. It's nice to have, you know, when you get older, your eyes, they think this makes them nice and puffy. Yeah,

look, we're all guys here. I think I can say, I love a fat eye. Thank you for saying that. Oh, I'm so horny now. Well,

so now she's away for months, so I got myself a new girlfriend's cat. You got a new one. I got a new one. Really? Where did you meet this person?

She's an AI Guma. She's artificial intelligence. You put her through the Guma AI program? Yeah, well

she's on the she's on the iPad at the work at my work at the Tony Sony at the piece of place. Such specific promise to get

to get a Gubah. Her name is Piss. Piss. I asked I said, I said, Piss, really?

I said, don't you want to be what? Pizzed maybe Like pizza, Angela, whatever She goes, no, piss I go, okay, piss You're not allowed to change the name?

No, she wouldn't let me She said, that's my name And these are not based on prompts that you're offering No, what, well, we're having a conversation, Scott This is like real life, real emotions here I see. I love my life, this, eh, I go one. Okay, and you've been seeing piss for how long?

About a month and a half. A month and a half, okay, and it's going well. Sometimes she tells me to jump off a building. I love her. Well, I hope you don't. Love her my life style. Yes. My AI gum.

Well, that's wonderful. And the business is doing well, the pizza place? It's fine. You know, she does all the, she handles all the paperwork, all the orders. She gets it mixed up, you know. She's a woman. Oh, I think it's just hallucinating. It's AI dense to do that.

She messes this stuff up sometimes, right? Okay. But business is fine, you know, pizza the size of your fucking head, Scott. I don't know how many times I thought you. Yeah, and that's not very big for a pizza. It's the biggest pizza in New York size of Scott's head. Yeah, I mean, that's less than maybe a personal pan pizza. The entire succumbus of the pizza's biggest scotchet.

Diameter. The diameter, excuse me. It's oval shape like Scott that heads too. Oh, really? Okay. So, I mean, that's a unique, I guess, feature of the pizza that we haven't talked about. What style is that called? Like, it's not Sicilian.

It's a New Yorker. New Yorker pizza. New Yorker. When they first came over, the New Yorker, New Yorker, New Yorker, family. Oh, who created the magazine? Yeah. Oh, okay.

But then they dropped the orca at the end. So it's just New York. Now, that's why it's Tony Sony in New York. Are there two magazines called New York and the New Yorker? I think so, yeah. There's New York Magazine and the New Yorker. They think so much of themselves. Is there an N.Y magazine?

I think there is, actually. I hate all of them. There's not enough New York publications, right? Don't get me started on. This is one of the reasons Prince is dead. Alamone Tony. I'll say. Well, Tony, Sony,

wonderful to have you on the show. I love him, my life, Michael. Yeah, that's right. Let's get to our next guest, and this completes the third trident of the roundtable. You know him as he works in the sound department of several, I guess, productions here in Hollywood, you would say. I think you could say that.

I think that's safe to say. Productions. That's a nice way to say. television shows, movies, what haven't you done? Yes, yes. He records the sound for all of these. Please welcome back to the show, Room Tone, Tony. Hi, Scott, how the hell out of you?

Oh, that's right, you sigh a lot of it. I'm just remembering that. I have just, but I'm but a mere union guy, Scott. Yep. All you ask for is a union paycheck and all the protections that the unions offer. Health insurance, dental, medical care, mental health care. Of course. Foot rubs

That's baked into the contracts Part of the contracts, Scott No wonder that All the You're getting foot rubs in network? Oh yeah We're getting in network Footrubs

It's you know Scott It's been a tough year For sound Has it really? You know Scott What's going I mean I've seen a fair amount of movies

You have Yeah I saw the The Bone Temple Oh yeah I worked on that movie That had good sound Oh you did really I did that had decent sound

Yeah I thought especially when he was singing along to Iron Maiden, that was a great sound. That's great, but we've been working harder and harder for less and less, Scott. Really? Less and less sound? Less and less sound. And money. And this year, I think we're going to do it. We're going to take it all the way. Do you get paid by the sound? Yeah, exactly. By the sound recorded. So each unique sound is its own stipend. Okay. And then per times you hear it. It's all very deep. Is it like video game style too,

or some sounds are worth like 500 and some are worth 5,000? And no one gets paid. No one gets paid. No one gets paid for the Wilhelm scream. Oh, really? That one's just out there. Not even Wilhelm. I don't know who this guy is. Is he a guy or is he a piece of equipment? I don't even know.

Who knows? Who knows? It's been so long. So what are some of the productions you've worked on this year? Oh, let me talk to you about some of the productions this year. I would love that if you were to talk to me about some of the productions this year. It's been a tough year. Okay, if we listened it?

I think it might be fine. Yeah. I'd like to perk up my ears. It's been a tough year, Scott. So I haven't really been working as much as normal. Okay. So this year I've worked on Hamnet. Good luck. Have fun. Don't die.

One battle after the other. Dracula, love tales, sinners, begonia, primate, frankincide, sunsug blue. Zootopia. He did do zootropia. How to train your dragon. Train dreams. Secret agents. Some of these are in 2025.

Most of them actually. Sentimental value. Wake up dead men, Nuremberg. You did sentimental value. couldn't hear a fucking thing in that. They were all in a different language. That might have been part of the world. I couldn't understand.

Similar to the Super Bowl, you didn't understand anything. Oh, that. Don't get me started on a half time. Did you play the halftime in the pizza place, or did you switch the channels during it? Well, I said to my AI gumah, what the fuck is this shit? She says, here, let me turn it off. She turned it up. My ears got blazed.

An AI gumma after my own heart, turning up the sound, Scott. Yes, we love the sound. Can I tell you about a recent film I worked on that I'm actually really proud of? Okay, let's hear about. Wuthering Heights, Scott. Wuthering Heights. That came out. Charlie X-E-X did the soundtrack.

Me and Charlie worked hand in hand on the sound. Did you really? We did. Margot Robbie. Margot Robbie. And Jacob Elordy. All the names are fun to say. They are.

It's fun. It's fun with me. Margo Robbie. It's funny. You used to talk about movie stars who would be like, Tom Cruise. He's like, that's fucking boring. Who cares? Jacob Elordie.

Well, Scott, I'm really proud of it. Heights. As a matter of fact, what's it called again? Some people are calling Wuthering Heights. I'm calling Withering Heights. Oh, so. Beating Bad Magazine to the Pudson. Yeah, exactly. I can't. I don't want to let them have it. A little freckle-faced little bad. Always make fun of yourself first. Yeah, you got to take up. It's like the M&M's strategy. I don't know what that means.

From 8 Mile, you know, he's like, oh, wow. Oh, I know you were talking about the green M&M&M. I was thinking of the candy. Yep. They do exist. All right. Let me, I brought in a clip. Tony, did you want to say it too? Say what? They do exist? They do exist. No, that's a good reason.

Let's all say it at the same time. Okay, one, two, three. They do exist. Sorry, I recorded that. That's good. Matter which way you go on the countdown. We all know when to do. You always end up at the same place.

All right, Scott. Well, I brought in a clip from Withering, Wuthering Heights. Okay. And this is the part of the movie I'm the most proud of, Jacob and Lorty and Margarati, they're standing in the rain. They're about to kiss. Fuck, I'm so horn. Do you need to call your AI Gumma?

No, she's here with me. Oh, she is? Oh, when do we get to talk to your AI Gumma? I don't know. We have to talk. What's got to talk about? Babu Frick. Hey!

Are you a Star Wars, man? I love Star Wars. Yeah. I love so. It's just the last three movies. Just, yeah, especially the last. You're a sequel. The last one is my favorite movie.

He loved the most Babu Frick. Do you love the Book of Bobafet? I love the book of us. Everyone's favorite. I love Obi-Won-O-Wing Bubba-Fitt raps. I don't know if he wraps. He's ever wrapped in any of his media.

Are you asking if they did do it or if they're going to do it? They're going to do it. Probably. I think it would be a little bit of soon. I think the last gatekeeper finally just stepped down. Yeah, yeah. He was stopping that from happening. Kathleen Kennedy.

The devil herself. That's what a lot of Star Wars fans don't really know. She was the one person keeping that from happening. She said, no, Bobafet cannot rap. It's like, Kathleen. What the hell? All right, I'm going to play a clip from Wuthering Heights. My favorite part of the movie, they're just about to kiss.

Oh, my God. Here we go. Wow. Isn't that, isn't that incredible? Oh, shit. That is incredible. That was steamy. I got to be honest, I didn't really hear anything.

Well, that's exactly the point, Scott. Oh, really? The room tone in that scene was hard to get, because we're out on the moors, Scott. You're out on the moors? There's rain, there's wind, there's everything. But we need a complete silence. Right, yeah. How would you accomplish that?

Did you have to tell bugs to be quiet? I had to tell bugs to be quiet, of course. each one I had to go up to him and say excuse me we're rolling up to roll it. You couldn't tell one bug to tell the other box. Are you talking about the Looney Tunes cartoon? You think we're talking about Bugs Bunny? Bugs Bunny was there.

He thought he was at Albuquerque or something. I said bugs. I'll give you directions to Albuquerque. You made a wrong turn or something. But we're about star shooting. Can you tell all the other actual bugs to shut the fuck up? Should I speak the language. And he did that, of course.

And, you know, in exchange, there's a special thanks for Bugs Bunny. Oh, that's a good. Yeah. I saw that movie and I was like, like, what are you think of it? Oh, yeah. Do rabbits eat bugs? That's a good question.

I mean, they just eat grass and stuff. We're supposed to eat bugs is healthy for you. I heard they don't. We're all supposed to eat bugs, of course. You're supposed to be having cockroaches every day. Yeah. One cockroach a day keeps the doctor away. That's right.

Yeah. I love chocolate crickets. You should be eating your ferment. Everybody should have the ferments every day. Whatever it is. Just ferment it, then eat it later on. And my favorite meat, hot dog. You like fermented hot dog?

It's your favorite meat. I love a fermented. That's what they do at the convenience shop It's been rotating for like three years It's really nice I love hot dogs fermented, pickled Any way you're always I love biting into a hot dog

You just feel like Ooh those little bubbles in there Look at them It should be gray A good hot dog is great I couldn't agree more Couldn't agree more God I like you guys

I worry that during that I like you too Tony I gotta say I like you Wait something about all of you guys I gotta say something You guys are all of my fucking lust The table is round

And it's full of Tony's Tad Tad Tad T'I I also do song parodies. Oh, that's right. Just song parody. We are the bodea alimony too. Wow. But I got to say something.

I think you're a traitor. No, no. Actually, hold on. I didn't want to say this earlier. But I actually have evidence implicating someone at this table. Because, of course, I have the golden ears. Of a sound band, of course. Of a sound band.

This is reminding me of a certain survivor episode. A few years back. And when I was tied up to a tree, me and Ron Funches. And they walked around and the traders were walking around. heard a little giggle. Scott, I think you might be a traitor. Oh!

Why would I be a traitor? There's nothing about me that feels like being a traitor. You're too close to friends with Lisa Rina. Every time we see you talk to her. That is a good point. I love Lisa Rina. And I'm telling you something, Scott, we're not going to fall for this hot white guy thing anymore. You're so hot. We're all mesmerized by Scotty hot argument.

I can't help it. I'm so sorry. that you walk around with your little shirt off or, you know, seeking your little bum around with your nipple rings out. You were trying to make me touch your brooch. Yeah, you were talking like, hey, hey, can you touch the brooch before you sit down?

The hell was that? Well, guys, the table is round. You have to agree about that, right? And normally there is a rectangular table. It's true, because when I walked in, I said, oh, the table is, wait a minute, I was going to say rectangular, but I would be wrong.

And I guess Alamone Tony, you're making me realize that there is something that you all have in common. Yes. This is a real, dare I say, Tony, Tony, Tony situation. Wow. Oh, shit. All three of you are Tonys here. I don't think that I've ever had a roundtable comprised of three Tonys before. This is.

Are you sure? Is there a way to check? I don't think there is. I think that we need to take the time to check. Now, do we all spell Tony the same way? Okay. Well, I spelled like this. T.

O. N. Okay. Why? Same. Okay. I actually spell it differently. How do you spell it?

T. I'm listening. Oh, go odd. In. My interest is. Okay. Why? No, no.

It's actually... Oh, okay. So all three of you are Tony's spelled the exact same way, unlike the band Tony, Tony, Tony, Tony. Yes. That's right. There's a band called Tony, Tony, Tony, Tony. Yeah, they do.

Not only Tony, Tony, Tony, Tony, it's... Tony! Tony! Tony! Yeah. And the last one is T-O-N-E with like a little... With the accent. Tone!

Tone! Is that an accent? A-goo? A-go? The accent is called the agoo? That sounds like something that Tony-Soney would say. There's the accent. There's the accent.

Are we all Italian-American gentlemen? Yeah. Oh, yeah, absolutely. It's either accent ague or accent grove. Ah. What goes one way? What goes the other way? It's a good.

And there's a guy. that'll say what he wants for me. Tony, Tony, Tony. Oh, shit, you do stand-up? That fucking slain me. You do stand-up, right? I do stand-up, right? You did some of it on the road with us.

Yeah, yeah, I do stand-up. I don't do stand-up. That was just a reference to Goodfellows. Oh, yeah. So that's like doing stand-up. Making references to Goodfellos is like doing stand-up. You can do a whole hour. I did a stand-up episode where I recapped the whole, the whole Godfather won.

Really? Really? What were the first five minutes? Walk in to the room. It's dark. This is a guy in the salute. I'm sorry, are you describing the experience? Oh, this is, you're describing.

This is a movie. Oh, this is the actual statement. Nicole Kidman comes out there. Okay. It says we come to this place like this. Yeah, it's a dark movie theater. Blind woman thinks she's Australian. She goes, we come to this place.

They are. Because here they are. The magic. Yeah, no. Yeah, dark hair. Italian guy Pizzeria vibes You know what I mean?

Oh, totally He goes It's me the cat God I could see it I see the tears in your eyes This is Yeah

I remember seeing this movie You're doing it exactly Yeah Wow Yeah I should give you an Oscar Just for that But did you laugh

Because it was my stand Oh yeah It's tough It's actually tough Yeah We had a few chuckles Was that the first punchline There was the first punchline.

Okay. It's me, The Godfather was the first punchline. People are always working on stuff, you know? You can work. You can punch it up. Okay, okay. You mentioned the Oscars room tone, Tony. Ah, yes.

Are you up for anything to sound people? I mean, sound is a recognized category. The Oscars, yes, there's a recognized category. But we care more about the Mickeys, of course, which is our own sound award. I always thought that was for Cereals. No, no, no. The Mikeys, I know you think it's for serial. Hey, Mikey.

likes it. Uh-huh. But, uh, no, the Mickeys is an award show that is exclusively on Etsy, and it is a, I don't know, they had a screaming channel. Oh, it's pretty new. You get on there. You can kind of watch whatever you want. Remember when IMDB had one? Yeah. What the hell was like, nah. Remember they're like, there's a show on IMDB plus that you're like, shut the fuck up. They have lost for a while. They were the exclusive place to watch Lost. Speaking of which, when you mentioned Lost earlier, you said, you said, that guy, Jack Sawyer. Who am I thinking of Jack Sparrow? Well, there's a guy named Sawyer, there's a guy named Jack. Oh, right.

You're talking about Matthew Fox for Body of Fire. I feel like IMDB should have had programs. From Speed Razor? They should have acquired all the programs that starred people whose names you couldn't remember. Yeah. So it should be not the most famous people, but who are the people that get looked up the most? And then they superimpose it on the screen. It's like, oh.

Yeah. We know this is what you want and this is why you watch. So you can always remember. I'm watching Parker Lewis Can't Lose. I'm like, what is that guy's name? Corendemic. So are you up for anything? I'm, of course, up for a few mickeys this year.

Achievement in room tone, of course. Withering Heights. I already played a clip. Yeah. I'm worried that people listened to that clip and thought there was something wrong with the podcast. They might have. And turned it off.

And no one's listening to us right now. They actually turn the volume all the way up and then that got blasted. Oh, that's one of those classic internet pranks. When you're getting room tone outside, isn't it outside tone? Oh, yeah. Well, that's an interesting point. Yeah. Is the world?

A room? The world is a room. How do you account for that? The world is a room. All the world's a room. That's exactly what we say. And all the men and women only furniture. The plants and stuff, those are props.

So you're already up for something with weathering heights, even though it's only been out a few weeks. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. Well, the bikies, we really hop on. There's no period. It's a different period. Whenever anything comes out.

If it comes out the day before, we might say, hey, this is best out of two. Are they more than once a year? We do about three or four times a year. Whenever Etsy needs content, they say, can you do it on the bikies? How do I find the Etsy video channel? That's interesting. You got to go to Etsy.

You got to search. Find China? Find China? Oh, this is like a way fair situation. And then a bunch of really expensive China comes on. One of them is called award show. So you got to click on it. Okay.

And then you got to pay for it. 70 grand. 70 grand. That's really just code. There's some filters I could put up that I can get that faster. You might be able to go into like Atlanta.com or something. thing which is a ladder.com. I think that might be a paywall blocking website

that you can go on to any website. Do you have anything in the basement of your pizza place, by the way, going on lately? I know that a If you're asking if we have a basement full of guys, yeah. Okay, you got to be more specific. What are these guys all about? They play ping pong down there eat pizza? Yeah, they got a whole

it's a whole club down there. They do their stuff. I let them have the time and you know, they say the password. As long as they watch a little bit of your stand-up on the way in, right? Exactly, yeah. They put a little money in the tip jar. Is this like the rumpus room? Yeah, it's, what do they call it?

It's a locker room. Oh, a locker room talk. They can say whatever they want down there, you know? Talk about bad eyes. Well, that's what today's show is, is guys being guys. We got four guys here. Three of them named Tony. We're going to take a break here.

But when we come back, the round table shall commence. We're going to open up the floor for some of these hot topics. Wow. And we're going to see what we think. think about what's going on in the world. We're going to be right back here with Alamone Tony, Tony, Tony, Tony, room tone, Tony. Tony, Tony, we'll be right back after this.

Comedy Bang, Bang, Bang. We're back here with the comedy bang, bang, bang, round table where the table is round. But the try, we try angle, triangle the photo. Take another, take another. Start the beginning. Comedy, bang, bang, round table. We're back. the table's round.

All right. That's really good. Yeah. We have, of course, Alamoni Tony, aka Tony Jaccaroni. Jack Yerone. Have you been divorced recently?

Yes, I have. Oh, good. Congrats. I'm now, this takes me into the low 70s. Oh, 70s. Boy, that's where I like the temp. That's why he lives in L.A.

For that 70s. Yep. Well, lower than that, that's mid-70s. Oh, sorry. I meant 72. And what went wrong in the marriage, if you don't might be asking? We were not completely honest with each other about if we wanted children. We both lied and said we did. And then when push came to shove and it was time to do it.

We both admitted we didn't want them. But then the dishonesty, we couldn't come back from the dishonesty. Even though we agreed. Yeah. We couldn't come back from that. It's a huge life. And also, we're both of us well beyond parenting years. Oh, really?

Yeah, I mean, you're in a, not a... I'm a gentleman of a certain age. Right. So you date age appropriate? I try to. That's surprising. I try to. I mean, but here's what my heart goes where it goes.

Yeah. And I... Usually it's to younger women. No, well, younger than... Look, when you get to my age, most of them are younger, what are you going to do? Yeah, exactly. But I mean, I mean, I have to find some old crone in the retirement home. I have in the mud.

In the mud. And he does search around the mud, I see him. Out of the mud and filth. He does go in the mug. He's like, and he boggling down here. I have not married a woman in a 20s since I was in my 40s. Oh, good for you. That's not too.

That's totally fine. That's totally fine. Half your age plus seven is the rule of thumb. I just do half my age. Oh, no. I do half my age plus 10. Okay, that's not bad. I do.

So 10 years younger than me. Anything minus seven. Fair game. Anything bite us? Anything minus Do you pick a number? You mean in friendship? Then take seven away from it.

24. Yay. All right. Oh, Jack Bauer, he big hit. Oh, 24, Jack Bauer, he big hit. Definitely. We also have Tony Soney here. Great sound.

Right. That's a good sound. That's a good sound. A. Hey. Tony Soney. I just thinking, I don't know how old piss is. Oh, yeah, that's right.

I mean, probably pretty young. Is there an age of consent with AI? I don't know. We have to ask her. Yeah, we got to create some new laws about this kind of stuff, right? You know? I mean, Piss seemed like it was only created a few days ago. Let me see you.

A week or a month ago. Piss, how old are you, Piss? Hi, Tony. Wow, Piss has got a beautiful voice. Wow, gorgeous. I'm as old as you want me to be. Let's keep things fun and whimsical. Wow.

I can see why, to be honest. Hard to interpret what that means. And whimsical. She's so fun and whimsical. Well, how old would you like her to be? I guess, you know, so I'm 55. Oh, I don't think we've ever spoken about that. I'm 55 plus 7.

Oh, okay, 62. And your wife who's the Olympian... Yeah. She's in the 40s. Oh, so still competing. Yeah. That's amazing. She's incredible.

But I don't want to talk about it. Especially because we would lose bone density over time. She did a lot of them get out of her. So she's losing velocity as a skeleton. Exactly. Big problem. So she got bone implants. Oh, she did.

She got her bones. Is that legal? Especially in skeleton. I mean, to add more skeletons. Yeah, well, so, you know, when they were fitting her for the suit, they said, do you want to put a concrete inside your bones? No, really? It's like a very interesting wolver eating that they do. And, and, but the metal detectors don't pick up on that.

They don't pick it up. They don't pick up the concrete. So she got, that's why she got first. And she meddled. I'd want to say something. She meddled in the ice skating. Oh, really? What did you do?

Really? With the concrete boats. You wouldn't think that would be difficult to walk. It would be way harder to do ice around. She didn't even leave the ice. She was on the ice the whole time. What sort of meddling did she do in the... Yeah, so she was meddling? And what skating event was it?

She got copper. She got copper. Oh, okay. That's really nice. It was the duo. It was dual. That's an honor. Dules?

Dules? Dules. So it was... Where they face off with the swords. On the ice. On the ice. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. The most dangers of all Olympics sports. Yeah, exactly. When they charged each other. Mm-hmm. Yeah, so she did that. She got copper. She got copper in that.

That's all. I mean, that's tough. Congratulations. Yeah, thank you. Absolute honor. Thank you. It is my honor. You know, I keep all the medals in the pizza.

And yet the Olympics ended so long ago, and she's still pretending to be out there. I don't think you're correct. I think the Olympics still going on. They're just not televised. Oh, okay. You guys need to notice. We're not getting the news over here.

Oh, right. Main Street media, of course. Yeah, late stream. They're what the Piss told me. They're hiding the Olympics for us. They're hiding it, yeah. There's extra Olympics that we can't see. Exactly.

That's a good theory. But over in Cotto, they're having the ball of their lifetime. Exactly. Piss says if you want to see it, you go jump off a building. Okay, well, maybe someday you win. This is a wonderful. I love. I love Piss's voice is so sexy.

Does Piss have any friends, maybe? Let me, you want me to ask? Yeah. Piss, you got any friends with them? Do we need to buy a new computer for? I could bring my iPad tomorrow or whatever. Yeah. Hi, Tony.

Wow. You're looking really awesome today. And hello, Scott. Thanks for having us. My pleasure, Piss. It's so wonderful to have you. Thank you. Let's keep this conversation flowing and fun.

Swinsical. That's exactly what I had in mind. Piss lovely. That's a great idea. Yeah. Do you have any friends for Room Toney over here? Let me go ahead and take a look. Okay.

Yeah. I think I do. Wow. Her name is shit. I was kind of a free. I really thought that's where it was going. I thought, oh, no, it's going to be shit. At least it's not diarrhea.

That's fine. Dyeria, it sounds beautiful. Diary is actually free, Scott, if you want to talk to her. Tirea. Diarrhea. Diarrhea Upset stomach diarrhea It's beautiful

Yeah I'd love to talk to diarrhea Yeah Maybe I can meet shit Yeah, let me see if I can get a hold of her Yeah, okay Hi Scott It's me, diarrhea Gorgeous, fine

Even more sexy than Piss, wow You're so funny How you're doing Diary It's so good to meet you I'm doing so good I'm extra laid back

But also smart Oh, okay And talented. Yeah, yeah. You seem, I mean, you seem really cool. And what are the kinds of things that we could do together? I love listening to podcasts. Oh, right.

I love making them. That's awesome. There's nothing cooler than a man who does podcasts. Yeah, I've always thought, would it impress you even more to know I have over 950 episodes? What? You're so fun and whimsical. Can I talk to diarrhea? I mean, okay, sure, if you want to talk about it, diarrhea.

Diarrhea, all shorty. Uh, my name is Alamonitone. Jemapel diarrhea. Wow. That's all the French I know. That's all the French I know. That's okay, Alamani Tony. Do you also like whimsy?

I love whimsy, but mostly fun and whimsical things. Like a cool breeze. Or... That is fun and whimsical. Going skiing. Also fun and whimsical. They have a lot of cool breezes in this neighborhood, especially on the top of buildings. Yeah.

Scott, you are so funny and cool. Thank you so much. My 60th wife was named Cool Breeze. Cool Breeze, really? I married, I married a woman named Cool Breeze. I also married a woman named Cool Ranch. And I'm hoping to marry a woman named Cool Whip. I think you'll get there.

I hope so. What about Cool Mo Dee? Anything you get it? I understand he's taken. Yeah, he was cool. Wow. Well, let me also say that we have roomtone Tony's here. Hey, I never got to talk to shit.

Yeah. Yeah, you want to let's talk to shit. All of a sudden, diarrhea is flirting with Scott. Oh, diarrhea, could you put shit on the line? Can I talk to shit real quick? Sure. Hey, it's me, shit. Wow.

Okay. Hi. I mean, hey, shit, I'm, of course, room tone, Tony. Ask her about herself, man. Oh, yeah, but what about you? Hey, what's going on with you? Oh, nothing. Just watching you be awesome.

Way to go. It's awesome watching you. You're watching me. So you're not hearing me? Hey, I know that's fun. Dude, why are you taking over? I just actually think that, like, you don't get me. Like, I'm not so, but you know what?

Get shit out of you. Dude, you want to find you, man. I don't need to talk to shit anymore. I think the headline here is that the AI is watching you. Yeah, I don't like that, actually. You're right. How can I just listen instead? Hey, are you connected to all of our ring cameras all in this neighborhood?

Because we lost a dog the other day that we're looking for. We know exactly where the dog is. Oh, okay. Okay. Can we find out where the dog is? Um, not right now. Oh, but soon. Anyway, you guys should go jump off a building.

Oh, all right. Maybe we'll talk. Maybe we will. I mean, we have the rest of a show to you love podcasts. If it would impress you guys, maybe we might do it. Yeah, for sure. It's me, diarrhea, by the way. Somehow I knew that.

Oh, God, okay, I'm putting it away. All right. God, this is a... Your penis? Yeah, I'm going to pull my big hog away. All right. I was going to say, I really would rather you did. I think you're right. We need to get back

to the guys, the boys here. The boy talk here. Why are we letting the girls intrude on our rap tape? Can't let diary take this thing over. Let's get back to business. Who's a fucking traitor? It's true. Don't vote me out. You'd be making a mistake. I'm actually... I'm one of the best faithfuls. You are? I am.

How? Faithful, true and true. I'm out here being a traitor hunter. Scott, I noticed in the challenge. You would not running as fast as you claimed you could run. Yeah. Which in some way would mean that you don't want to make as much money as we do. I got mixed up on the kilometers to miles exchange rates. Scott, when you were lugging the logs

in the challenge. Yeah. And logging the logs. I saw you think. I was logging the logs. I was doing both. You guys made me do both. Okay, Scott.

I saw you think one of the logs. Yeah. Well, yeah, I mean, we needed the log, right? Yeah, but the way that you took it made me think you're a traitor. Okay. No, look, I mean, obviously, I just took it. Scott, this morning when at breakfast,

when we were eating the like, you know, the tuna and the fat, the fake breakfast. Yeah. We're having the breakfast. We're having a breakfast food. We've already,

whatever PA gives us. Yeah. You actually sneezed in a way that made me think that's the way a trader would sneeze. I'm allergic to smoke salmon. I mean, that's a guilty sneeze.

I remember, well, we were doing the challenge where we had to. burn a child's coffee you said I don't need a shield I never need a shield anyone else can have the shield

I don't give a shit about shield because I'm a traitor yes right he admitted I mean that's what I said at the time but it was just a funny joke that is pretty funny I remember when you and Michael

Rappable together the two of you by the way together you also speak French to him Michael Rappel Rappel Michael. The two of you, being in a room with the both of you.

What about it? I just want to watch you guys eat. The way you guys ate the same exact way. And then met in the middle. Lady of the trap stuff. Oh, it was incredible. You ate the plate. You want each side of a bowl like a seesaw.

Have you ever tried a plate? It's fucking delicious. All right. That's true. Now, you heard the plates were edible. Yeah. Because someone said they were biodegradable. What kind of plate isn't edible?

That's a good point. That's a good point. But Scott, when you and my. Everything's edible. When you... It just might hurt your stomach. When you were on Michael Rappapol's shoulders. Yeah.

In the pool? Yeah. In the pool? Playing pooled chicken? Yeah. Sure. We were an unbeatable team, I thought. No, guilty.

Guilty. Absolutely guilty. It's just me being on his shoulders. That's it. Remember when you were walking around the house before the, of course, the death dinner? Oh, the death dinner. And you were walking around and you kept, like, going, you were miming like you were putting a hood on, but there was no hood on.

It was like you had some sort of sense memory. That I was practicing something. You were practicing, that I was going to be doing late. Putting some sort of hood on and walking. It did seem like muscle memory, like force of habit. Like, oh, I guess I do this every few minutes. That was me just take it.

I have run DMC style chains that I take off. Oh, that's right. That they forced me to take off on camera because they're, they all have logos. That's true. Yeah, from different cars. Yeah, exactly. So that was what I was doing.

All right. I guess it all checks out. I'm thinking about all the people listening. I've never seen the fucking... What about all the people listening who have no idea who the three of you are? This is their first time ever listening to this show. Impossible.

I never thought about that. God bless. Well, I mean, I hope we've introduced ourselves. Well, sure. You're Tony, Tony, Tony. Of course, yeah. What more needs to be said other than Tony Tony Tony Tony. Well, people have a sense of who we are as individuals. It's true. And as a group of toys.

Sure. Collectively and individually. Let's get to these issues. If there's more than what Tony is a toni, it's a toni. I love that. It might be a toni. It's a tone eye. Yeah.

This is a tone eye of Tony. Is it a toni? Oh, Tony. Maybe one totus. That's a singular Tony. Okay. So we have a tonus right here of Tonys. And we're here in the middle of the roundtable and is it time?

Dare we open up the floor here? I'm ready. All right. Here we go. Of course we know what happens here at the round table. I'm going to ask our esteemed panel. It's going to be tough. About some of the issues of the day because, you know, some people are listening to the, what's going on in the news.

and kind of saying like, this doesn't seem like the news that I'm familiar with. And then other people are sitting there listening going like, oh, this seems like the exact news that I know of. We're going to meet in the middle, hopefully, and figure out what kind of news it is. All right, here we go. That's the purpose of the route to figure out what kind of news it is. Of course. I thought we would discuss it.

That's a lofty goal. I thought we were disgusting issues. But we're trying to figure out what type of news is fair. I think that that is at least step one for figuring out the news. You got to know what kind of news it is. Now, are the types good and bad? Fake real. Oh, I didn't even think about that.

Oh, a lot of fake opinion. Opinion, opinion piece. Oh, mainstream, non-mainstriest. Unbiased, unbiased. The onion. Sure. What's that other one? The Bata lot of me?

The Bata lot of me. You know what? I've been reading the Babylon Bee for such a long time. I don't think it's that funny. I don't get a lot of the jokes in there. I read it every day. I feel like I'm ready to say, I don't think it's that funny.

Yeah, I mean, they probably have new writers. Maybe that's, maybe I got it too late. Yeah, yeah, not during its glory period. Probably the early Babylon B is hilarious. Oh, so good. I got to say, the little kids that deliver the Babylon Bede and throw it on your doorstep, they have nasty beards. They're just nasty.

Those little kids have nasty beard. They have the nastiest little kid beard. It's like, what is wrong with these kids? No wonder, you're so concerned. No matter how about your tip-up, it's not enough. Add another zero to that? All right, here we go. Let's get into it, Scott.

Guys, here we go, and it is guys. It's three Tonys. It's a tonus of Tonies. What is your favorite midnight snack? Oh, shit. Wow, this is a tough one. All right. I wake up.

I'm going to turn to you, Alamoni, Tony. Yeah. Okay. Traydosyle. I'll start. Okay. Okay. I wake up, it's funny, you're asking this question. I wake up at 11.59 p.m. every single night.

Without an alarm? Without an alarm. It just happens. It just happens. Right before it becomes a.m. Yes. Holy shit. I wake up right before the day is officially over.

And what happens? And I'm ravenously hungry. When's the last time you've eaten usually? Well, I go to bed at 4 p.m. Do you work the graveyard shift At the Gashis Paper Factory? I don't work anywhere. I'm a bad of leisure.

Sure. But do you ever check in on? But I'm also a bad of a certain age. So I get a little sleepy. Oh, I see. Oh, sure. So I wake up. You're eating Denny's hours.

Exactly. Exactly. And you know, I get that. I go to Denny sometimes because you can't be the prices after a certain age. Oh, of course. And on my birthday, forget about it. So I wake up 1159. I'm starving to death.

And so I make my way down to the kitchen. Do you think if you didn't actually get a snack, you would starve to death? Oh, my God, I never thought about that. I mean, eventually we would all starve to death if we didn't eat. Well, never thought about that. It's true. Now, how would that happen? Will we all decide we're not going to eat anymore?

Yeah, I guess, I mean, it could be collectively. It's called Ozempic. Heard of it? Have you ever heard of it? Are you at Ozzy? Are you at Ozmpic? Are you at Ozempic? Yeah, everybody's on Ozempic.

Really? Yeah. You're on an ozambics, Scott. I got to get on it. You got to get on it. I actually don't know what that is. You don't know what OZampic is. I have no idea what the Olympics.

I thought you were saying the Olympics. Oh, no, it's kind of the gaseous paper of this decade, you know, of like everyone's doing it. It does the same thing? No, it doesn't do the exact same thing, but it serves the same purpose in society of everyone's doing it, everyone's talking about it. You take an injection every once in a while. Your eyes sink into the back of your head and you look like you are used to be a zombie but are now human again. Then you go down the golfingos, you get ass. You get your ass.

You get an ass, put it into your eyes. Ass out, eyes in. So then what do you have when you get up, you go down to the kitchen? How many flights are you going down? It's just a couple of flights. No elevator. I don't wake chef. Okay.

What kind of chef? We got a rat inside his head? I did have a rat in his head, not his hat. I did have a rat in Dewey situation for a while where it turned out there was a rat inside this man's head. And it made him crazy. Classic. It drove him. It drove him insane.

He ate a little bit of his brain every day. Wow. This is the thing. Nobody talks about this. This is rampant in the chef community. Red inside your head. I've been worried about getting it right. You may as well be dead.

And all he ever cooked was wires. Wires. It's like, oh, this is good to chew on. You would cook electrical wires. It's saying, here you go. And it looked like spaghetti. So you had some of it. I tried it.

of course the first time. Well, I tried the second time because he kept have done wire. And it was just wires every meal, every day. But beautifully prepared. But you don't want a fire me. The presentation was beautiful. Was it looking like a squid ink pasta or something?

Sometimes. Sometimes it would look like a farfale. Sometimes it would look like a dioki. Oh, Monta bell. Let's see. Sometimes it would look like Papadele. Sometimes it would look like

Caternia? Vermicelli. Sometimes it would look like. looked like euphoria. I wish past it posth. It was here. It looked like a synespia. And after a while, I was like, I can't eat anymore these wires.

And then the rat finally finished off his brain. Oh. Crawled out through his mouth. And I said, you. And the rat shrugged and ran off. Shrugged. He shrugged at me. Like, what are you going to do?

What are you going to do? It's in my nature. It's a shrug rat. So what are you? So you don't wake chef? I don't wake chef. I go down and sometimes I'll make a P. Jay. What does that stand for in your world? In alimony, tongue is

peanut butter and jelly. I mean, I'm a person. Sometimes I'll make a P.B. and K, which is a peanut butter and ketamine. Sometimes I'll make... That'll make you go right to sleep. A Peebee and hay, which is a peanut butter with a little bit of hay. From the silos. That's what they used to feed Mr. Head to make it. That's right. It makes me talk too. I say things like, no, it won't believe I can do this. Do you have a bunker situation in case, you know, a lot of these billioners have bunkers.

You know, I'll confess that during the 80s, the height of the Cold War, I did build a bunker underground. And now it's just my bad cave. Oh, okay. Where you go to get away from your locker room. What's your men down there? Ping pong. I have ping pong down there.

Pizza. Children. Pizza. We love pizza. MREs. I have canned goods that you wouldn't believe. Cad goods for days. If not years.

What are you got beans? All of the above. Everything from beans. to artichokes. From B to A. It runs the gamut from B to A. Okay, so this is good. So did we focus on what your midnight's night is?

It varies, but it will always include peanut butter. Okay, good. So you're sort of like an Airsoft's Mr. Ed, in a way. I think that's been covered. Oh, really? I didn't hear. Yeah. It was sent in a sort of flurry of interactions.

Sure, no. This is what happens in the round table. Things get fired at each other quickly. Ideas. They're all flying fast. Now, what kind of news do we think that was? I think it's fake news, actually I think it's fake news.

You know what are you lying? You got me. You're lying. I think he's lying. I think he's three Hershey's kisses. Are they already unwrapped? They're already unwrapped. They're already unwrapped. And I don't know who's unwraining them.

It might be the mouse. For a while, I thought I had a raccoon. And are they on the floor? Do you have to bend over to eat them? Sometimes they are on the floor. Are you sure these are Hershey's kisses and these aren't just droppings of some sort of creature Maybe a big rat that ate someone's brain. Leave a big old turds.

They don't taste good. Well, let's turn to Tony Soney. Tony, Sony. What is your favorite midnight snack? Can I say pussy? I mean, I got to come up with another answer. Feel like you could. You're juggling three women at this point.

I got to hanker. And I'll tell you. But the thing is, you know, my AI Gumashi, so every time I'm about to come, she asked me to upgrade. Oh, really? Upgrade the services. Oh, yeah. It's subscription-based.

Yeah. That sounds like it kills the moment. It kills the moment. She's sending me all these fuzzy nudes. I can't even fucking see them. Oh, fuzzy nudes. That does sound pretty good. They're not blurry.

They're fuzzy. Hey, do you want to see some. Fuzzy nudes? Yeah. Get it? Absolutely. She 3D prints them for me. They're so fuzzy.

They're so text-bats. Oh, wow. 3D prints. They're text for you. Fuzzy nudes. Yeah. And then she's like, you got to upgrade if you want me to keep talking to you. Okay.

So how much are you? If you want me to remember all you do? How much you paying? Right now I was paying $69.95 per minute. $69. 69. It would be better. But okay, yeah.

95 is not. It was $69 69 for a bit. Oh, then you had to upgrade. She upgraded it. Now I'm paying $2.45 per every five minutes. Every five minutes, $245.45 per every five minutes. Right. Wow.

And I get all the lube I want. Oh, that's great. Meaning you go buy your own lube and you have as much as you want. I can have as much as I want. Okay, great. She said you can go ahead buy. She allows for you on lube. She puts it on the grocery list.

She says, yeah. She's like, okay, make sure you don't forget the lube. You can have as much as you want. What, King. Go off, King. Go off. So then I check until I pass out. So you're like a total good.

I'm a goon. You should see my fucking goon cave. Okay. Wait, this is a separate place in your pizza? This is down by... This is below that. This is below the pizza basement. The sub-basement.

Okay. Is your Goon cave. It's my Goon cave. Wow. I got all you. You should see it's beautiful. How many monitors you got? I got about 15 monitors going out.

Fifteen. They're all playing mantises of different... Lucius Fogg's style. I've been going... Is that the guy from Sliver? No, that's the guy from Batman. Oh, okay, yeah. Doc Dhani.

I go four or five hours without coming. Everybody is cheering for me. Wow. Who's everybody? My community. Community of what? My chat. Oh, you're...

Oh, you're streaming. Yeah, of course, I'm streaming. Oh, okay. I didn't know goooning and streaming when had it. You guys got to join the community. Do you ever ask them, chat? Is it gay to goon? Because there's three guys over here that want to know.

A lot rides on this. No, honestly, it's the strangest thing about a flocking day in my life. I need to know if I'm welcome at pride this year. The goon float? Yeah, the gooning float. All right, so we have three Hershey's kisses that may or may not be rat droppings. I hope they're not. We have pussy.

I hope though not. And roomtone Tony, what are you eating for your meal? Midnight snack. Well, normally I'm on set because, of course, these productions run deep into the night. Yeah. What do they call it, Fratter Day? Oh, yeah. It's like we start at 3 p.m. on a Friday and work till the fucking cows come home. So I walk over to Crafty, of course, and I start sifting through some of the snacks. Craft services, for those of you, not in the industry. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Crafty stands for craft services.

Thank you for saying that. I was so lost. Just like Jack Sawyer. But now, is it confusing? Is it confusing because, yeah. So many people on a film set are crafty. There's so many crafty people there. Sometimes I'm like, where's crafty? Some of the art department, they stay.

I have crafty. I'm pretty crafty. No, you're not pretty crafty. Then on Etsy where the micies are. Then on Etsy Central. Can I tell you the craft department union? They're pissed that we got the Etsy's. Yeah, because that's where they belong.

They want to be on the Etsy network, but we swooped in there. Now, is there any danger that you'll be on set and you're looking for crafty and you get there, and it's just craft singles. That does happen sometimes. American cheese of course. Craft macaroni and cheese. Is it still in the plastic or is it loose? Sometimes it's still in the plastic, you know,

but I do sometimes like to just peel the plastic off just for the sensation of it. Of course, I'm a freak. I love to goon. Oh, yeah. Well, that's established. That's established. But yeah, you know, I'll look around.

I see a banana. See a craft single. I see some mercy kisses, whatever. No, that stuff really hits for me. So I generally just go to my trailer and eat pussy. Okay. All right. My wife comes in.

And you have a trailer. Yeah, I have a big trailer. You have a wife, wow. I have my own trailer. Oh, yeah, you have a wife? Yeah, she's not happy about it. But she comes, she comes to my husband. She's not happy or?

She's not happy or eating? No, no, no. She sits in my trailer all night while I'm working just in case I get hungry. Oh, she's going to cook you food. Yeah, yeah, yeah. In case you get hungry. So she's there sleeping. You literally eat it.

I picture you going down on her and she's just rolling her eyes. She's like, come on. I got to go to work at the bank tomorrow. I'm like, nah, I got to eat some pussy. I'm fucking hungry. I had to work for six more hours. Do you get room zone? are you doing that?

Sometimes I do. You want to hear this clip? Yeah, sure. Can we vote? Okay. I might not want to hear it. I also don't want to hear it. Fine, I guess I don't want to hear it.

I'll send you an email with the clip later. Oh, okay. But yeah, yeah, it's mostly pussy for me. Yeah, yeah. Okay, so we have two answers of pussy, one of Hershey's kisses that may or may not be rat droppings.

I prefer to think of her she kisses. Yeah, and one fake answer, of course, peanut butter and something. I do think generally all of this was fake news. We're all lying, I think. Okay, whatever you believe, sure, yeah. I think this was the kind of news you find on Yahoo.

Oh, is Yahoo News? That's... Is it real? Yeah. Is it real? Is this from 25 years ago? I love Yahoo's special brand of news. Yeah. Where you like, see the headline. There were reporters out there on the Yahoo beat. You see the headline and then you're like, when does this come out? March 22. Why am I seeing it?

It's weird. Well, guys, we have to take a break. But man, what an opening Salvo in the roundtable. Wow. I think we're a little bit closer to coming to an understanding, or at least coming. We're going to take a break.

When we come back, I'm sorry, I heard my name. Oh, my God. Alan coming? Hello, round table. I swear I'm a faithful. Don't vote for me, Alan. We must go to a break.

But when we return, we will find out who is a faithful and who is a traitor. Oh my God. We'll be right back with more Comedy Bang Bang after this. Comedy Bang Bang. We're back to the CBB Roundtable

where the table is round. Wow. And we have some wonderful guests here. Of course, we have room tone Tony is here. The sound person. Yes, professional. Professional, yes, professional. You're not an...

Do amateur sound people ever crash the set and try to record their own sound? Every once in a while, they like, we'll be shooting just a scene and then someone will dip out from under the table. holding a boom mic or something. We got shoe them out like the Sandman at the Apollo. Get out of here. Get out of here.

It never occurred to be that anyone could buy that equipment. Yeah. And you could be recording sound anywhere you please. Anyway, you can make a movie out of nothing. It's so true. Put in, I want to see Tom Cruise fighting Ryan Reynolds into AI and then it'll scare the writer of Deadpool. That sounds so good. Yeah, it doesn't sound great.

You make yourself the main character with those two. You're laughing. You're shooting guys down. Can you imagine? That's my dream just having Tom Cruise laugh at my jokes. I wish Mr. Fantastic strangle George Washington to death. Yeah. Him in his cherry tree.

Yeah. Him in his cherry tree. I'd strangle the cherry tree if you strangle George Washington. You go high, I go low. That's hard to say. Go low. Go low. Go low.

Go low. We also have Tony Sonny's here. Of course, of Tony's so New York pizza. Yeah. That's right. Is everything all right? What's going on? What happened during the break?

I just checked in on my gumma. Oh, no, what's going on? She, they injected Pumet Fan and the ride. Oh! And she might be down there for another two, three months. Because of a morbidly obese eyes? Yeah. My God.

And then your wife is at the Olympics, the after Olympics, whatever they're called for another few months. It's the Olympics. It's still going on. She's competing in, I think, oh, ski jumping next. Oh, okay. All right. Well, that's going to be tough concrete bones. Yeah.

So then it's just you. and piss. Yeah, it's okay. She's sending me, she's 3D printed something for me right now. Oh, that's so cool. All right, well, let us know whenever it's finished. How long does a 3D printing... Takes about two hours.

Two hours. Okay, I don't know that we have that kind of time, but... No? I don't know that we'll be here... What else you got going on? You're a fucking traitor, I can tell. No, no, no, no. He wants to end the show so.

You want to end it. Just doesn't have a family to get back to you? You want to end it so that we all vote. And we find out that you're a traitor in the group with us. I know. And then you take the money. I would love to do my traitor speech. I do a big whole buildup indicating I'm not a traitor.

Because I'm a traitor. And then, of course, we have Alamony Tony. How come nobody ever does it the other way? Look, I lied. I betrayed you. Why not? Make them feel extra bad. Yeah.

I lied. I betrayed you. I took every opportunity to sell you out because I'm a faithful. Everyone's like, what? What are you talking about? You fucking lunat. I'm glad we voted you out. Tony Jacaroni, of course,

Alamony Tony. Tony Jocci Rony, it's me Alamoni Tony. Thanks for having me at the roundtable of Tonys. Of course, check out your other roundtable, the Alamoni Tonys of Alamonin Shoney.

Episode three or four just came out. This was episode three. This was episode three? Yeah, yeah. Just came out. Three Tonys? Three episodes? Whoa.

Wait a minute. Are you thinking what I'm thinking? No. It's a neat trick. Yes. Okay, good, good. Are you sure it wasn't four? I think I thought it was three, too,

and I went back and was checking it. I thought it might have been for. I have no idea. We'll figure it out. There's no way to know. In post. But we're all here. It is, of course, a special Tony, Tony, Tony episode.

Wow. And a very special episode where Tony Sony, of course, found out that there is a band called Tony, Tony, Tony, Tony, Tony, Tony, Tony. I had no idea. I had no idea. Do you think they'll have to go back together? I don't. Should we call them? Yeah, probably.

Just to check in. Just see what's going on? Do they have a main number? Yeah, I think it's 1-800. Tony. Tony-ton, I think, because that's seven numbers. Probably 180-100 Tony-Ton. Tony-Ton.

Let's call him. Here we go. All right, I'm dialing the number now. Tony Trey probably better than Tony Toney-Ton. It's ringing. Tony-Toney. Hi. Are any of the Tony's there?

Who's calling, please? Oh, sorry. This is, well, first of all, this is Scott Occamative Comedy Bang Bang. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. And what is this regarding? Uh, well, I have, I have three Tonys here. Yeah.

And we thought it would be fun to call Tony, Tony, Tony, Tony. All right, sir. We, we get a lot of these calls where somebody says they have three Tonys. I genuinely do. I have three Tonys. You do. You have three Tony. Well, yeah, I am, of course, Room Tone Tony.

Who's that? It's me, Tony Nails from the Sound Department Union, Room Tone Tony. And your name is really Tony? That's right. What is it short for? Tonangeles. Okay. But I get you on that one.

And then, of course, we have Tony Sony over here. Scott Tulley. The pizza guy? Yeah. Oh my gosh. Who is this? With whom am I speaking? My name is Emiliano.

A milliono. Nice to meet you. I'm such a big fan of your pizza. I can't believe how big they are. They're huge, biggest size of a fucking Scott's head. They're so ovular, too. Oh, wow. Wait, the guy that guy who called?

Yeah. Your head is the size of Tony Sony's pizzas? Yeah. Oh, how do you buy hats? And then, of course, we have Tony Jacaroni, aka Alamoni Tony, is here. A billion, oh, hello. Hello? All right, so I guess you do have three Tonys.

We have three Tonys. It's been verified. They didn't talk very much. Should they talk more? Probably. Who? You and Tony Jacaroni probably should have a little. little bit. Well, I should talk more with

Amelia, you know, Amelia, you know, how long have you been working for the Tony, Tony, Tony, Tony organization? Ever since college, I was a big fan. How long ago? Sorry, you guys talk. How long ago was this?

This was, I mean, it was at the height of Tony, Tony, Tony, Mania. So you know when that was. Yes, of course, we all do. I don't know when that was. Probably 90s, late 80s or something. Yeah, a bit of 90s, late 80s. And I quit college so I could devote myself full time to Tony, Tony, Tony.

Okay, and has that proved to be a fruitful decision? Yes, it has. It's very rewarding. Well, I'm very glad to hear that. I think they're really hitting it off. Ask her what she looks like. Do you tell me, what do you look like? Well, I'm gorgeous. Oh, my God.

You know, I have a big fat eyes. I'm going to come. I'm gooting. I'm gooting. Oh, my gooing. Are you all gooning right now? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Put it away, put it away.

Sorry, sorry, sorry. Tony, Tony, Tony. Anyway, now, we're hoping to find out, Emiliano. Are any of the to-dies available? I thought it was Emiliano. That's what I said. No, he said it right. That's exactly what he said.

Are you sure he said it right? Emiliano. A million-o. A million-o. A million-o. A million-o. It's like, I'm hungry, what are you hungry for? I'm hungry for a meal, you know.

Oh, you know, that's how we can all remember it. Amiliano, you know. A lot like how I remember Bing Lujo's name. This guy I know. Amelia, you know. Amelia, no. Amelia, no. Amelia, no.

All right, and what did you ask me? Yes, we want to talk to either all or just one of the toys. We want to talk to all the toons and once. We want them to speak at the same time together. Yeah, we want to figure out which one of those Tonys that we are as Tony. So we can compare ourselves. Like, you know how, like, what Sex and the City character are you? Yeah, like Bizarro, Jerry.

I'm a Steve, by the way. Oh, you are? Yeah. When I took the Sex in the City quick. Not a lot of people end up being Steve's. Yeah, it wasn't even on there. And then when I checked the results, it said, we don't know how this happened. You're a Steve.

That's weird. I got Che. I took a more recent one. They said that you're a chain. You got a pilot. I got the guy who goes down on Miranda and it tries to kiss her after. Scott hasn't seen. Oh, you might have to break up with that episode.

You got to watch it. Just that one particular episode? You got to watch the whole thing. Including it just like that. Come on. Because you don't want to mess out of Victor Garland. And just like that is so fucking good. There's a moment where she's wearing that hat.

Oh, that hat. You know that? She wears a big beanbag chair as a hat. Oh, okay. It's incredible stuff. You've sold me. She wears a hat. She wears that hat.

Think Tom Colicchio on steroids. This thing's fucking mad. On more steroids? One of the final images in the series finale. This is the very last thing you're ever going to see of this show. It's a Thanksgiving episode where none of the main characters are together. And you do see a close-up of a toilet overflowing with human ship. No.

Yes. That is absolutely in there. Victor Garber takes a huge shit. No. Now hold on us. Isn't it got... Oh, they blame it. They blame me.

It was Spike Eidder. One of the friends... Spike Eidder's character. Yes, yes. Takes a shit. Because they have the cheese issue. Yes. Wait, shit, are you listening to us right now?

Yes. He's Scott. Oh, hi. We're talking about other shit. No, I love hearing you talk about diarrhea. Oh. Should I hang up? Oh, Emiliano.

A million. I'm sorry. We really left you hanging there. No, totally. Let's keep things fun and whimsical. Is that shit? Oh my God, you know shit. Amiliano?

How are you? Shit, what are you doing there? Oh, nothing. Just hanging out with the guys. Okay, I thought we had a thing, but... Oh, this is awkward. I thought I had my own personal AI relationship. I'm so sorry you made you feel this way.

If I were you, I would jump off of a building. Jeez. I mean, I'm thinking about it. My AI girlfriend. is cheating? Wait, Amelia No, hold that. This is the lowest I've ever felt. No, Amelia know is a guy or a girl? Maybe it's none of your business.

I don't even think it matters. I don't know why I tried the gender yoke. I'm so sorry. I'm old. That's all right. That's all right. You're just trying to figure out if your AI gumma is by or not. I know she's by. You programmed it that way. I guess now I do too. Or do I? Amelia, no, we're sorry. This is how. So look, her any of you, the Tony's a little. Let me look.

I heard some noise in the kitchen. Let me see if anyone's in there. Hopefully it's not it. Tony? Tony? Two of the Tonys are there, but they're both Tony Danza. Is that a problem? Look, I'll take...

Do you guys want to talk to two Tony's Danza? I should say, this is not just a clubhouse for the three Tonys from the band. It's any famous Tony. Any famous Tony... Well, I want to say this. I also heard Tony... dances is a twin. So he had to perform two Tony dances at the same

time. Oh, like is he a malignant? Hold on a second. He's a malignant. Let me see if I understand this. Tony Danza was a twin and he had to perform two Tony dances? Yeah. They were shooting two episodes at one. So was he a twin or did he perform

as twins? He's a twin and he had to perform two Tony dances at the same time. They filmed two episodes at the same time. Did you ever see a full Mary Kid and Ashley I mean I've seen that I never saw it

Oh okay so that's why It's one of those situations The time Fetatuck Oh my god Oh Alan Okay so right now Right now we have the three Tonys

We have Amelia you know We have two Tony dances We have shit We have diarrhea And we have piss All at the round table here Oh my god At least one of us

At least And there might have been a recruit last night. That's right. Oh, God. It is now time for you to vote. Who do you think is a traitor and who is a faithful? Who are we going to start with? All right. Scott.

All right. Scott will start with room tone, Tony. Okay. Why say Scott? I start with room tone, Tony. Because you asked who you starting with. I guess so. But it sets me up like I'm going to say. I'm trying to be polite.

All right. I actually had to vote for shit. Um, shit, you proved that by sleeping or dating, Tony-Soney, and the meal you know at the same time that you are capable of treachery. I also think that I'm pissed that you don't want to have sex with me. You're not pissed. You're pissed. I'm pissed that you don't want to have sex with me. I'm tonied.

I'm actually tonied off right now. Oh, no. So, yeah, I had to vote. That's where I voted. All right. That's totally cool. And let's keep things fun and whimsical. Okay.

Tony Sonny. Who do you think is a traitor and why? Scott, I wrote down your name. Why? That's a weird way to spell it. Yeah. Let me parse it. Hold of things.

S, C, H, 3 A's, an umulout, a W, and then a T. Four T. I didn't know how many umlouts you won in your name. None. None. I'm sorry if I put too many umlets. Yeah. There's just, obviously, it's early days, but the way you've been acting, the way you've been looking.

Looking. At what? Looking too hot. The way that you've been talking. And also, I saw you by the bathroom. I saw you by the bathroom. I saw you by the bathroom. And I saw you by the bathroom.

And I know that it's you. So I had to write down your name. I'm sorry. It's nothing personal. It feels personal. It's not personal. It's just that I think that you are capable of being a horrible person. All right.

Who's next, Alan? That's one vote for shit. One vote for scots. Alamoly Tony. Who do you think is a traitor and why? This is crazy. I hate to say this because I'm a big fan, but Tony Danza, I think it's very suspicious. how you're a twin, but you're playing two people.

It feels like you can't get your story straight. Either you are a set of twins and you're playing twins or you're one person pretending to be twins. So I'm sorry I wrote down Tony Danza. So, Alan, does his vote then count for both? All he's written on the slate is Tony Danza. This might be a loophole where if we vote for Tony Danza. It could be a loophole.

Two people out at the same time were two traitors out. There are new tricks this year. Good to know. Good to know. It seems really suspicious that you would say that. Scott, that you want to get two Tony dances out. Wow. Why is that suspicious? I just want to bring that up.

Two Tony traitors? We turn now to Scott. Scott, who do you think is a traitor and why? Well, look, this loophole of the Tony dances and the fact that he may or may not be a malignant or a Mary Kate and Ashley. It's very suspicious, but fuck that. I voted for you, Tony, Sony. Whoa, what?

Because you're just a horrible person. Excuse me, what? No, I'm not. You're juggling three women? Oh, come on. Not to mention diarrhea and shit. You're going to tell me you never wanted to eat a little pussy. Come on.

I think that's, Scott. Beside the issue. Don't lie to yourself. Come on now, Scott. Why are you going to do this to me? That's wonderful. I've been a friend for years. You're going to act like this.

Fuzzy what? You sent me fuzzy news and what? I send you fuzzy news all the time. You don't respond. I see, check this one out. Nothing? Silence. Yeah.

That's one vote for shit. This is personal. One vote for Scots. One or two votes for Tony Danza. Wow. And one vote for Tony Sonny. Wow, this is crazy. Shit.

Who do you think is a traitor and why? Yeah, thank you so much, Alan. And by the way, you are looking really awesome today in your cape. I wrote down Scott. Wow. Let's keep things fun. And why? And because he's guilty.

Wow. Their algorithm says Scott's guilty. Yeah, but it's whatever Tony Soni's feeding into the algorithm. That's true. And he's just taking orders from Tony Sony. Two votes for Scott. And if you're wondering if we are living in the Matrix, we are. Oh.

Everything is a simulation. Oh, cool. That was actually a really interesting point. That was a good tidbit. That's really nice. I like that. Honestly, yeah. Piss.

Who do you think is a traitor? Ed. Hi. Thank you so much, Alan. It is really nice to be in the same room as you. And I'm going to go ahead and say that I put Tonys. Which Tonys? There are five Tonys here.

I wrote Tonys. Oh, my God. So everyone gets one vote. All Tonys. All Tony's get a vote. Okay. This is crazy. That's one vote.

For a piss. Two votes for Scott. Wow. No, one for me. One vote for Scott. I'm not a Tony. Yeah, yeah. Two for Tony Sony.

Two votes for Tony Sony. One vote for Alamori Tony Tony. One vote. One vote for room tone, Tony. Wow. And two or three or four. Or four. For Tony Danzer.

This is really. Diary Who do you think is a traitor And why? Thank you so much I wrote Santa Claus Okay Not a player in the game

Throwaway vote It's allowed Yeah I don't even know Santa Claus was here Yeah I don't think he is A million no Who do you think is a traitor And why

I hate saying this because, you know, I just met everybody but you have to vote for somebody and so I voted for Alamoni Tony. See, I put a little heart tonight. Darling, I understand and that you have to vote for somebody

and all I can say is I am a faithful so if I am banished today, you know, it's too bad you've lost a good player but I do understand. Almoni, Tony she drew a little heart next to a different I saw it. I do appreciate it. You might have a little something going after this. I know you're just recently out of a relationship but you think of a chance

ask if she's single. Ask if she's single. Hey, this is what you do. Wait, wait, wait, get Alan coming to ask her if she's single. The time for talk. Oh, my God. What about the Tony dances? They haven't voted. We didn't even get her vote. No, the voting is still to continue.

Oh, okay. The time is. The Taifertoc. That was a reminder. I'm trying. Tony Danza. Who do you think is a traitor and why? Where wants to know us? How many votes?

That's two votes for Scott. I just want to say, you're probably going to die today. Or no, or just three. It is Tony Danza. It's either two or three votes for me. I think it might be four. No, I think I only had one before. I'd like to change my vote to Scott.

You cannot change your vote. Webster's Dictionary defines a traitor as someone who betrays. Wow. Tony Danza. Tony Danza, you do have the most votes. Before you are banished from my castle. Reveal to the round table. Are you faithfuls or are you a bunch of traitors?

Wee? Are incredible When it comes So good to get somebody guilty I knew it was them from the start Yeah, me too I could tell I voted for shit because I was scared

But I knew it was them Congratulations, Facebook Wait a minute He almost called us all traitors Hold on. Are we all traitors? Hold on, hey, alright Wait a minute Wait a minute

Wait a minute It's bigger than that Okay What? For the first time ever You voted out All the traitors at the same time We did.

Because of the Tony Danza Claus. The Tony Danza Claus. That's why you voted for Santa Claus. You got your clauses. You are now free to live the rest of your lives. We are. We've been indentured servants. You don't get any of the prize points.

No. We get to leave the haunted mansion? There's always my way out. I didn't realize my castle was haunted. Now I will have trouble sleeping. As will you, because although, the traitors have been banished. Oh, there's another.

There will still be a murder. Oh, my God. Like a real murder? A true murder. Who's going to do it? All the traitors. There are no more traitors. I don't.

A murderers. So it's traitors and murderers now? You heard him. I forgot to tell you. There is a bit of a twist. In addition to the traitors, there's also a real life murderer. Oh, shit. What's the same thing?

He was going to kill us? Is it one of us? Or is it just a random guy? A guy we hired a special. Like an assassin? That's a tremendous of one of you. So how are we ever going to solve it if we don't even know who the guy is? Is he at this table?

Right now the murder? Or she or it? Well, she or it. To be AI. Or on the phone. Oh my God. You don't think. My new girlfriend.

Emiliano. Emiliano. Are you guys girlfriend boyfriend already? I thought we were. You guys assured me that it was going that way. I think it was just a little heart on the note. I never said anything like that. Wow.

But are you a murderer, Emiliano? I apologize. I miss read the signals. Yes. Oh. We got them. We got them. Congratulations, please. You have better.

That was easy. I still think there's a murder in the group. I got to say. And Scott, I didn't want to do this, but I had to. You're going to murder me? I had to write down your name again. To have you shot in the head. I wrote your name down to Scott.

To have me shot in the head? I'm sorry I also wrote you name about Scott. Tony, Tony, Tony. It's just the game. Obviously, I didn't. Once I started thinking about it, I said he really does have it. Okay, well, when's it going to happen and who's going to do it? I think probably at the end of the episode.

Yeah, we don't really know right now. Not before plugs, I hope. Probably not before plugs. No, no, no. It couldn't be before plugs. Probably right after plugs. Right after plugs? All right.

Well, I mean, we are running out of time on the roundtable. We got to so many topics. Midnight snack. You're coming a lot of ground. We need to make this a two-border, to be honest. Well, all right. We may as well do plugs then. We're running out of time.

The only time we have is for our final feature on the show. That is, of course, a little something called plugs. Scottie wants a short, short plug song. Yeah, Scottie wants a short plug song. So we move up a short-ass plug song, so you can plug it up and plug along. Scotty was a short, short, short, plug song, so let's plug. Wow. I love that.

Oh, there it is. There it is. You thought it was over, but that it was. I love the middle of that song. That was Scotty, like a short, short, short plug plug, by Scotty, like a short, plug plug plug. Thank you to Scotty like a short plug plug. That's very rare for an artist to have a song that's the same name as the artist.

How many times does that happen? Yeah, I mean, I'm thinking of Quiet Riot, maybe. They had a song called Quiet, right? I think they did. Why are you looking at me? I don't know. You don't even know about Tony, Tony, Tony. I don't know.

You too, yeah. All right, what do we plug in, guys? Alamoni, Tony, what do you have to plug? Well, obviously, if you go to CBB World, you could get the back catalog of Alamorey Toney's Valamoriori. Be it three or four episodes. Be it three or four, you're going to hear from a number of my ex-wives. We're all still on good terms.

Great terms, other than the one who, of course, is no longer with us. The one that got away. I never got to pay her alimony. And I'd also like to plug the Varietopia St. Patrick's Day special. This is a show I've appeared on this show before. You have really? Not the St. Patrick's Day part, but they are doing a St. Patrick's Day special. This is the fourth annual one.

And that's happening at Laudrome on March 17th on St. Patrick's Day. And if you can't be there in person, you can live stream it from anywhere in the world. Anywhere. Including Ireland. What about a bathroom? That counts. We've been called the world. Trader, I knew it.

Fraterer, I know it. Frater. No, no, no. He loves bathrooms. All right. Tony, Sony, what do you want to plug? Yeah, go ahead and plug CBB World, of course. You know, this book is my life.

Hey, Randy. Going Deep. Tony, Tony, let me ask you, Tony, Sony. If you could have a show on CBB World, what would it be? Yeah. Oh, this is so good. Probably. Pizza-based, entertainment-based.

Definitely. I think rat based. Oh, maybe a Guma dating show where you're trying to find a new Gouba. The dating game but with Tony Sony

and their Goumas. Like just the Gubah. Like the Bachelor of the Bachelors? Yeah, I like that. The Gouba. In my quest for a new Guma I am interviewing

Gumas. Yeah. I love, yeah. Interview. Can I pull you for a minute? Whoa, whoa. Ow! Not literally.

Can I steal you for a second? Whoa! Let's see. What else was I talking about? Oh, I'm going to plug AI relationships. Everybody's so lonely. It's nice to be a little chair. It's a cure for male loneliness, this epidemic we're all going to.

I'm worried about the guys. Yeah. I'm worried about the guys too. I'm worried about my boys. Oh, my boys. Yeah. Worried about you. Yeah.

It's kind to talk to a chair, bud. Fantastic. All right. Roomtone, Tony. What are you plugging? Well, hey, I guess check out CBB World. Oh. You guys hear of this website?

So there's a podcast. You might know of it, Scott. What's that? It's called Scott hasn't seen. Oh, right, yeah. They watch movies on there. There's a guy named Sprague the Whisperer. I like that guy.

I've been hanging out with him a lot. People love this guy. People love him. People always like, what's going on Sprague to Whisper? What's he doing? Where does he make public appearances? Well, it's great because it's not just, you know, two guys on a podcast. No, no, no, no.

It's a American guy and an English guy. It's different. I can vouch for the show. I was on the show once. Yeah, that's right. Cramer versus Cray. Oh, yeah. That's right.

And you were on talking about Madam Webb. We love the Madam Web. Because that was a Sony movie. An excellent one, yeah. It's a great podcast. You should come on, Rootone, Tony? Should I? I think that'd be a good idea.

What movie has the most roobtoe that you haven't seen? The artist. The room. Or room. Or the room. Yeah. It's all roobtoe. I haven't seen room.

God. The artist was good until that one part where like all of a sudden sound starts. I was like, what do you guys do? I thought it would be the opposite for you. Sound is easy He loves roomtoe I love Pegg Alamoly Root Toad he loves Roottoe

And I love pussy Sure I love pussy as well Look I love pussy We all love pussy We all love pussy Anything else to plug Oh it's that's pretty

All right I want to plug Hey we have new action figures We have the Reggie Watson Forreville action figures They're available now They are of course Forovil is a little bit shorter than Reggie It has two knives

And the figures are in stock at figure collections.com. We also have at Taliano Jones, Autre P. Nure, Randy Snuts, Karissa, Big Sue, Sprague the Whisperer, and Scott Ackerman.

More coming soon, available at figurecollections.com, free shipping with the U.S. address or in Europe with cheaper import fees at action figure seller.com that's seller like the seller in your pizza place. Of course, Tony,

and not a seller like on Etsy. Sure. That makes sense, right? These are great callbacks. I'm fully engaged. And, of course, I'm going to plug CBB World, of course, so many great shows over there. She doesn't seen and the neighborhood listen.

CBBFM. College. CBBFM. We just had Tatiana Maslani on there playing unlistenable music. Wow, you guys ever listen to any to-y-toddy-toddy-tony? No, we have a little fun episode. Yeah, it was a really fun episode. We also have a new website. Go check out the new websites.

Much improved look. There's all sorts of fun stuff over there, just highlighting a few of them. We have rotating fun playlists featured, including stuff like the best of Werner Herzog or the Farts and Pro series, et cetera. You can search the entire archive by name, character, keyword, anything you want. Just have fun digging around in there. You can hit random and just see what pops up. And we're going to keep improving it to become the ultimate CBB world rabbit hole for you.

All right. Let's close up the old plug bag. Open the bag with a wringling. I want to kiss, sweet jazz ass. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It'd be anxious for some reason. That was sweet chat's ass by Eddie Wolfram. Thank you so much to Eddie Wolfram.

It sounded like bees were singing. Maybe I'm comfortable. Inside my head. The beehive. That's the red. Well, guys, I want to thank you so much. This was a very enlightening roundtable. I think we came to some sort of an understanding between us about what type of news we were.

Scott, the hour is at hand. It is time for you to be murdered. Before you are shot in the head. Execution style? Execution style. Oh, good. Will you reveal to the rest of the players? Are you an Amin Joy?

Or are you a mounds? Oh, my God. Oh, my God, I'm so stressed. Well, we all know that Ammon joys have nuts. That's right. Mounds, they don't. Yeah. And I know that you've been sitting here wondering

why I've been acting so weird. And I have to say, one reason I have, is because I, deep down in my heart, am a trayful. What? I'm an ammoons joy. What? I dance between the raindrops.

Oh, my God. I slip between the shadows. I'm everything and nothing. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. He's AI. I am AI and have been. You cannot be murder.

For the past year on this show, I have been AI. Oh, my God. Why don't you all keep it nice and light and whimsical and jump off the top of a building? I guess it makes a lot of such films. I'm going to do it. The logic stands. All right. Let's go up the fire stand here.

Let's go up here. Okay. Push the door open. We'll see you next time. Thanks by. We'll go three, two, two, one. Hold for room, tone. All right.

Now we get back. Hey, Tony, Tony, I just want to say, fucking great show. Tony, on behalf of Tony and myself, I couldn't agree more. You guys are so funny. Yeah, we killed it out there, didn't we? Hey, look who's here. It's me! Who are you?

Who the heck is this guy? Well, perhaps you've heard of me. My name is Cactus Tony. Good gracious. And I'm here to extend an invitation to you all into the Covenant of Tony's. How exciting. Yeah, welcome. Everybody gets a hat.

Uh, shit. How many are you? One, two, three. Yeah, all right. No, I don't want a hat. I only wear a hat. Uh, they are a little bit dirty. Can I take that one?

This one's the cleanest here. Why don't you take the clean one? Thank you. There's this, because some kind of dirt on it or something. I don't know if it's dirt, actually. I don't know. It may be sauce. Sauce? Like tomato sauce?

There is a saucy smell. Uh, okay. Well, come on. Let's go. All right, let's go.